#apparently i juST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS!
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fanart for @qoldenskies's caged lungs fic 💥💥
it isn't based on any scene in particular, just my overall interpretation and visualization of things I felt. mostly bad things. but apparently human brains enjoy that. so let's go
I'm gonna ramble now, buckle up
Frankly that's the first personal piece I've drawn in months, and I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful that I was able to feel emotions and wanted to draw something again
I struggle a lot with empathy and understanding of other's feelings and displaying my own but. I hope people will feel something by looking at it, too
I've got inspired by the old tale that we used to read on literature lessons, altho I for the life of me can't remember the name of it, or anything else from the plot for that matter. There were a competition for retrieving the jug from the bottom of the river, where many men tried and failed, as they couldn't reach it. As you can already tell, it was a reflection of the jug that was hanged on a tree all along.
I liked the concept of something unreachable being seen as being very close to you :) hence the whole water situation
generally water is seen as a positive symbol in art but for me it's cold, slippery, you can't see shit in it, misleading and uncomfortable. go figure
and I really like how CL displays yellow as a color with negative connotation while it's classically being the The Most Happy Coded Color Ever.
while I'm at it I wanted to share a song I associate with caged lungs in particular
just let it die!
I would have liked to talk more about how awesome the fic is and how invested I'm in the plot and characters and how noticing details and parallels makes my brain go brrrr but I'm shy and not really eloquent with my words. I hope you will get the idea anyway. I love it <3
& textless version :0
If you spot any symbolism, it's probably there. or not. up to you really. that's how art works. have fun
#this art is about diluting yourself for the cause that deceptively seems reachable#i feel so embarrassed every time i engage with the fandom#i fight my cringe for my freedom every day#I couldn't NOT include the bird in my art that isnt happening#I couldn't NOT include the skeleton in my art that isnt happening#canary continuity#rottmnt#my nerd self tells me that turtle ribs dont work that way but my artist self tells me fuck it we ball#digital art#art#Spotify
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Part two of monster!141 x chubby reader
Part One.
CW: reader isn’t in a good place mentally and it’s affecting her reactions and the 141 absolutely take advantage of it. This is definitely not accurate in terms of reality. Reader has a lot of self-esteem issues, especially regarding her weight.
The thing is, you know you should be panicking way more. You know you should be fighting back, trying to think of an escape plan.
But you don’t. Exhaustion clings to you like a second skin, and you simply decide you don’t have any energy to do anything much- especially against shifters twice your size at the minimum. If they want to kill you, so be it. You doubt there’d be anyone to miss you; your parents only ever cared about your other siblings, your friends weren’t exactly your friends apparently, and you ex…
“Penny for your thoughts, dove?” The harpy whose lap you are perched on murmurs, wings fluffing out around you, the feathers soft and warm. You haven’t been on any couches or cushions ever since you woke up here, always in one of their laps. You had been terrified at first, and fear still lingers even now, but all they do is hold you tight and occasionally sniff you. Nothing more.
“Not worth much.” You whisper, closing your eyes as you take a deep breath. The feathers around you rustle again, tickling your skin ever so slightly, and you can feel him nuzzle the crown of your head.
“I disagree,” Kyle says, voice musing.. The arms wound around your waist tighten, and you are pulled impossibly closer to him. Your head still finds it hard to believe just how strong they are- easily maneuvering someone even of your size like your weigh nothing. Your ex never bothered; often just made a passing mention that maybe he’d carry you like that if you hit the gym and lost a few pounds. “Worth quite a lot to me. To us.”
You don’t have a reply to that; it’s still weird and unbelievable to you. Soulmates. What a joke. Even if they existed, you doubted anyone would like you like this. Not to mention the soulmate of a harpy, a werewolf, a dragon and a wraith? It sounded like a crappy plot you’d find while scouring the internet, written by a college student driven insane in their last year.
But they insisted they were right, and refuse to let you go, and now here you are being cuddled to one of them while the other three thud about upstairs. You can hear their voices, but not what they are saying. Though it sounds like they are quite busy.
“You cold, dove?” Kyle asks when he feels you shudder again, at last wrapping his wings fully around you even before you can answer. The feathers are so soft, and he smells so nice, like jasmine and vanilla. You almost felt hungry, simply smelling him.
“No.” The answer is quiet, croaked out tiredly. Sleep tugs at you even though it hasn’t been that long since you’ve woken up, the pounding, hungover headache long since dissipated.
You hate this syrupy slowness that lets you remain snuggled against him. You hate how safe you feel, despite your mind screaming at you otherwise. You don’t know these men, don’t know anything about them except their names, and yet your body has never felt quite this comfortable.
“Sleep, precious.” Kyle croons, his hand rubbing down your back. He buries his face in your hair, still crooning, and leaves a trail of kisses across your temple. “Sleep. You are safest and soundest here, with us.”
And so your eyes flutter shut, and your breath evens out; sleep comes to you as easy as breathing, and for one, ephemeral second, you don’t worry about your weight being too much for him.
#noona.writes#cod x reader#cod#cod x you#tf 141 x reader#tf 141#tf 141 x you#cod imagines#john price x reader#poly!141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly 141#kyle gaz x you#kyle gaz x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#kyle gaz garrick x you#gaz x reader#johnny soap mctavish x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader#noona.posts#simon ghost x you#ghost x you#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x you#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#john price x you#soap x you
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lot of people have OPINED on this post that i got it INCORRECT and id just like to SET THA RECKORD STRAIGHT,,,
"touchy" is not the corresponding adjectives for the tactile sense to "smelly," "tasty," and "noisy"!!!
what is a "smell"? it is a sensation of the type that the sense of smell perceives. it is a "quale" (<- singular of qualia apparently) of the sense of smell. "smell" + "y" = "one of the type of sensation you get thru your nose" + "adjectival form of previous, describes what it is like"
the word "smelly" meaning "bad-smelling" implies that if something is a "smell" [and therefore "smell-y"] then it smells bad. by construction the word "smell-y" means "has the characteristics of a smell" but by convention it means "smells bad". therefore something that has the characteristics of a smell is something that smells bad. therefore the default kind of smell is bad. likewise if something is a "taste" and therefore "taste-y" it tastes good, "having a taste" = "tastes good." "noise-y" things sound unpleasant, "having a noise" = "sounds unpleasant".
but the prhase "a touch" does not serve this lexical role for the sense of touch. "a touch" is not a texture or a quale of the sense of touch. things with textures or things which feel like things to touch do not "have a touch" or "make a touch" or anything like that. you could maybe make the case for "feely"? but feely on its own does not mean anything. so there is no default kind of haptic quale the way there is self-evidently a default type of quale of hearing or tasting or smelling.
"sightly" has also been suggested as the corresponding adjective for the sense of sight. it is not as egregiously wrong as suggesting "touchy" for "touch" but i contend it is still illegitimate here. something that smells a certain way clearly "has a smell," something that tastes a certain way clearly "has a taste," something that sounds a certain way "makes a noise." does something that looks a certain way "have a sight"? "make a sight"? do anything "a sight"? no. and if that is not sufficient "-ly" is not the same suffix as "-y" at all! the "-y" suffix is widely attested as literally meaning "has" or "is" or "makes" or "is like" or similar, for whatever is prepended to it. the "-ly" suffix barely ever makes adjectives at all.
the word "smelly" is very straightforwardly constructed in such a way that it should mean "has a smell," but in fact it means "has a bad smell," which is why we can draw conclusions about the default way that things have smells from it. the words "touchy" and "sightly" are not straightforwardly constructed in this way. they merely gesture vaguely at the senses they are associated with
the default way for things to taste is good. we know this because "tasty" means something tastes good. conversely, from the words "smelly" and "noisy" we can conclude that the default way for things to smell and sound is bad. interestingly there are no corresponding adjectives for the senses of sight and touch. the inescapable conclusion is that the most ordinary object possible is invisible and intangible, produces a hideous cacophony, smells terrible, but tastes delicious. and yet this description matches no object or phenomenon known to science or human experience. so what the fuck
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Alive Hale family, friends/bfs Sterek, they both benefit from each other greatly.
I mean, sure, Derek gets this supposedly all powerful spark who can control mountain ash with just a thought, but you know what's better than that for this middle child syndrome ass werewolf?
A second home with no werewolves that know when he's lying or to listen in to whatever he's doing, especially with the soundproofing wards (tho, all the Stilinski's have a pretty good bullshit detector but they won't try to press him if he really doesn't want to answer)
The best part, no younger cousins or sister to bother him, no older sister or uncle to purposely piss him off in order to trigger his shift as a way of "training," and he trusts Stiles and his family, so he feels he can lower his guard and can act as "wolfish" as he wants
Whenever he stays over night, or just for dinner, he gets to actually be part of the one and only conversation that's happening. Not that he does every time, he's fine with the knowledge that he can join and will be heard along with just watching and listening to the Stilinski's arguing about whatever.
Stiles, apparently from a long line of only children from both sides of his family, is ecstatic every time to go to the Hale's home.
He gets this big house full of people that match his energy in terms of like, when parents want to tire their kids out. Which is great for him since he tends to have a lot of pent of energy, when the kids and him do exhaust themselves, they end up puppy piling together on the couch and it's one of the best things ever
Up there with the puppy piles, is the nights he stays over and is able to do storytime and conjure up little lights that take the form of the story that's he's reading (he also goes about using his magic to relax the kids, in a sense? to be sure they do fall asleep by the end of the book, like the way one would use lavender to relax).
Plus they live out in the middle of nowhere and are a part of the supernatural, so he doesn't have to worry about using magic in front of the windows with the curtains open because the Hale's have no neighbors to be potentially looking in or overhearing things.
#sterek#stiles stilinski#derek hale#stilinski family#the hales#the hale family#stiles x derek#derek x stiles#eternal sterek#same age stiles and derek#spark stiles#teen wolf au#teen wolf
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[ID: A digital comic with a simple drawing style. It consists of long text that is accompanied by small drawings, matching what is said in the text. The text reads as follows: "I've always been a big reader. I was treating earlier and faster than most of my peers my whole childhood. [Three books: one is titled "Magic treehouse" and has the caption "kindergarten", one is titled "Harry Potter" and has the caption "first grade" and the last one is titled "Percy Jackson" and has the caption "third grade".] and my tastes have alwaystended towards the magical. fairytales, myths, and fantasy have been longtime favourites as far back as I can remember.
As I got older, my tastes didn't change all that much. They did expand, to being ok with things like horror, violence (and mild gore), death... As children's tastes tend to do. But I still loved fantasy stories just as much. When I hit eighth grade, however, they noticed a bit of a problem. I was getting a bit old for a lot of the middle-grade fiction books I liked. I thought: "Okay, sure! I've read adult-level books with no problem before, I'll just head for the fantasy section!" I asked a couple of friends for book recommendations, and culture reading except… [A drawing of many different scraps from books, all clearly from romantic and/or steamy scenes] ... All of it was just so stuffed with sex and romance. [A drawing of a person shaking their heads in disbelief and saying "ew" while reading the book, with an arrow pointing to them saying, "14 and very aro/ace"]
Needless to say, I did not want to read those books (and haven't to this day.) Thought bubble of the person just described continuing: okay, this is probably just my friend's stuff. I know they like these kinds of things. I'll just look for myself! [A drawing of a person standing in front of a big bookshelf that is labeled "young adult and teen fantasy". There are many different phrases pointing to the box on the shelf. The phrases read: "sex scene on the first page", "sex", "twilight", "romance "' subplot'", viscerally upsetting description of making out", "fade to black sex scene", "no sex but only technically", "sexy elves", essentially a romance really", "insane amounts of kissing".]... you gotta be kidding.
Over the years since then, I've tried to find fantasy stories that I can actually enjoy. [A drawing of a list titled "typically good". The bullet point read: D and D based (sex jokes but party focused), comics, fanfic, older media (pre-90s), MG fiction (last resort)] I've had some success at finding patterns that work for me, but a lot of these categories are very digital. (At least for me.) And because of that, all the time I once spent reading is now on my phone.
I don't really know where this is going, or what the solution is. Most people do like sex and romance, and reading about them. And this is just a thing for making a terrible comic day. I think it's pretty common for aro and/or ace people to feel left out, since so often these are treated as universal ideals. But to anyone feeling that way: I promise you are not alone. Also, allos: get better writing material, seriously. And better friends, since yours are apparently so terrible you can't write deeply meaningful relationships without kissing. (Half joking.) / End ID]
Note: this image description is not fully complete, as I left out some smaller drawings that I couldn't add into the text in a way that makes sense and weren't crucial for understanding. Also, I apologize if this description isn't clear to people who use screen readers but I do not know how to make it any better. If you have any suggestions, tell me please.
My (late) contribution for Make A Terrible Comic Day! I've been going to the library more often lately so this has been coming up a lot, cause I want something to read but have had trouble finding anything that I'm comfortable with.
If anyone has recommendations please please let me know because I am struggling.
#I'm not romance-repulsed but the older I get the more aspec I get apparently because I'm growing more tired of romance ansd sex in books#so this is a mood and a real issue#check out the notes on this post there are so many romance or sex free book suggestions#aromantic#aro#asexual#ace#aspec#boosting aro art#romance free books#sex free books
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labour // leah williamson
a/n : i giggled a lot writing this.
warnings : none really, set in a hospital, reader being gobby
Leah was ready for anything. At least, that’s what she’d been telling herself for nine months. She’d read books, watched videos, and even gone to a birthing class where she’d accidentally fainted during the “miracle of life” video. But now, with you gripping her hand like you were trying to crush her metacarpals, she realized nothing could have prepared her for this.
“You’re doing amazing,” Leah said softly, her thumb brushing over the back of your hand.
“shut the fuck up you evil woman,” you growled, your head snapping toward her with the intensity of a woman possessed. “one more bloody ‘you’re doing amazing, and i’m going loose it”
Leah blinked. “Alright, cool, cool, cool. I’ll just… stop talking.”
“Good idea,” you hissed, then immediately let out a pained groan that shook the room.
The midwife, a chipper woman who apparently didn’t fear death, tried to help. “Let’s focus on breathing—”
“Don’t you start with the breathing! I AM BREATHING, AREN’T I?!”
Leah glanced at the midwife apologetically. “She’s normally lovely. I promise.”
“Don’t you dare apologize for me!” you barked. “You did this to me, you fucking cunt! You and your stupid, sexy smile!”
Leah couldn’t help but smirk. “You think my smile is sexy?”
“NOT THE TIME”
An hour later, you were in what the midwife called “active labor” and what you called “the seventh circle of hell.” Leah, to her credit, was trying to keep it together, but you weren’t making it easy.
“How about I go stand up front with the midwife?” she suggested, trying to be helpful. “You know, cheer you on from the sidelines—”
“ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY NOT!” you yelled, grabbing her wrist then smacking her arm with surprising strength for someone in so much pain. “YOU ARE STAYING BACK HERE, WITH YOURE WIFE. I can feel my fanny ripping in half, ain’t no way in hell your seeing that”
Leah blinked, torn between amusement and terror. “Babe, that’s not—”
“NOT TAKING ANY BLOODY CHANCES!”
“Alright,” Leah muttered, holding her hands up. “I’ll just stay here then.”
“Good,” you snapped. Then, as another contraction hit, you added, “But you’re still not getting sex for a year. Minimum.”
Leah gasped in mock horror. “A YEAR?!”
“Maybe two! Depends on how long it takes me to forget THIS,” you shouted, gesturing wildly to your entire body before screaming in agony once again.
“Didn’t you say earlier that you’d forget everything once you saw the baby’s face?” Leah asked you.
You leveled her with a glare so sharp it could’ve sliced through steel. “FORGET WHAT I SAID EARLIER! one more word from you woman and i’m getting a divorce.”
By hour nine, the room had descended into chaos. You cussing out at everyone in sight, including the poor anesthesiologist who had tried to offer you an epidural.
“I don’t care if it’s late in the game!” you shouted. “Stick the bloody needle in my spine, you fucking COWARD!”
The anesthesiologist froze.
Leah quickly intervened. “She doesn’t mean that.”
“I MEAN EVERY WORD!”
“She’s in pain,” Leah added, patting his arm. “She called me a ‘stupid, gorgeous twat’ earlier. It’s just how she expresses love.”
The anesthesiologist looked unconvinced but did as you asked, and for the first time in hours, you seemed to relax.
“Thank God,” you muttered, leaning back against the pillows. Then, turning to Leah, you added, “Don’t get comfortable. I’m still mad at you.”
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the midwife smiled. “Alright, one more big push!”
“One more?” you snarled. “THAT’S WHAT YOU SAID THREE PUSHES AGO, JANET!”
“Her name is Emma,” Leah whispered.
“I DON’T CARE WHAT HER NAME IS!”
Leah bit her lip to keep from laughing.
“Alright,” the midwife—Emma—said patiently. “Let’s do this together. Big push!”
With a guttural scream that would’ve put banshees to shame, you gave one last push, and suddenly, the room was filled with the sound of a baby’s cry.
“She’s here!” Leah exclaimed, tears streaming down her face as the midwife placed the tiny, squirming bundle on your chest.
You stared down at your daughter, your entire world shifting in an instant. “Oh my God,” you whispered, tears pricking your eyes. “She’s perfect.”
“She is,” Leah agreed, leaning down to kiss your forehead.
“She’s also loud,” you added. “Definitely gets that from you.”
“Oi!” Leah protested, but her grin gave her away.
Later, as your daughter nursed contentedly, you looked at her with a soft smile. “You know,” you said, stroking her tiny hand, “your muma is going to be so jealous. You’ve stolen her favorite spot.”
Leah gasped, clutching her chest dramatically. “Innocent ears! Did you just tell our newborn daughter about—”
“Yes,” you interrupted. “And she’s got a right to know.”
Leah shook her head, feigning devastation. “I can’t believe you’d corrupt her like this. On her first day. What kind of example are you setting?”
From the corner of the room, Leah’s mum, who had been quietly observing the whole thing, finally spoke up.
“Right, well,” she said, smirking, “this has been the most entertaining day of my life.”
You groaned, burying your face in your free hand. “Oh, God. You’re still here.”
“Still here,” her mum confirmed, grinning. “And I can’t wait to tell this story at Christmas.”
Leah burst into laughter while you muttered something about filing for divorce.
That night, as you lay in bed with your daughter snuggled between you and Leah, you sighed.
“I guess I forgive you,” you murmured.
“For what?” Leah asked, her voice soft.
“For putting me through hell today.”
Leah grinned, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “Does this mean the sex ban is off?”
You shot her a look. “Don’t push your luck, Williamson.”
#woso#leah williamson#leah williamson x reader#woso imagine#leah williamson imagines#leah williamson x you#leah williamson one shot#leah williamson fluff
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CLIMB THROUGH MY WINDOW
PART TWO — [fuckboy!chris x smart!reader. alcohol, drugs, dj on the vj, fingering, eating pussy]. you find yourself gravitated towards chris at a party, letting up more than you thought you would.
ʚ part one ɞ — ʚ part three ɞ
despite your studious lifestyle, and somewhat good decision making as a teenager, you didn't always turn down a party. if you had done all your work for the week, and had found a good lie to tell your parents, then you’d show up.
after that night in your room with chris he hadn't really spoken to you, other than in class or around school. you hated to admit it, but it bothered you. a lot.
it had been a week since then and you’d already seen him chatting to other girls by their lockers, leaning on them like some idiot as he chatted them up.
you didn't let that bother you. you knew chris, and what he was like. he was a fuck boy, of course he was gonna do exactly that and fuck other girls. deep down you wished you had the sexual confidence to sleep with other guys, maybe make chris feel shit. although a part of you knew he wouldn't even care.
you also knew that not having sex with him was bound to push him away, but you weren’t stupid enough to just sleep with him to keep him close. if he didn’t want what you was giving him then he could fuck off. which is what he would do.
this was your first time at a boys party though. you thought there'd be no difference, it was the same clump of teenagers in their school that showed up to all the parties. but apparently, not having a girl as the host meant there were a lot more rouge plus ones and a lot less organisation.
the house was poorly lit, only adding to everyone's intoxication, as well as the mixed smell of bo and alcohol.
you walked through the crowd, clinging onto your best friend's hand in the hopes that you wouldn't be separated. the both of you thought that making a beeline for the garden was the best idea, but the second you got out there it was just as busy.
“who the fuck are all these people?” you mutter to bella. “no idea.” she huffed, looking around to observe all the new faces.
as you make your way through the garden, you spot chris. he’s sat on an outdoor sofa, surrounded by other rowdy boys and some girls who were very obviously flirting with him and his friends. you tug at bella's arm, motioning towards chris.
“no, i don't wanna go over there.” bella huffs, raising an eyebrow. “c’mon. it's just chris, you know he's nice. besides, he's my friend.” you say, slightly desperate to go over there.
“friend?” she questions, giving you a certain look. “you guys are fucking.” she mumbles under her breath. you scoff at her words. “i'm literally a virgin.” you retort, as if that changed anything.
“you're still doing stuff with him.” bella mumbles back, trying to tease you. “okay whatever, i'll meet up with you in a bit.” you say, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “kay love ya.” she hums back before you separate ways.
you walk over to chris, noticing the half rolled joint in his hand. as soon as you’re close, he immediately looks up, a bright smile on his face. “didn't expect to see you here.” he says, returning his gaze to the joint as he delicately compacts the tobacco and weed into a cone.
“why not?” you remark, taking a sip of your drink, the already decided first and last of the night. he shrugs, licking the paper. “dunno, hardly see ya at parties.” he responds, folding over the paper meticulously before looking up at you. “thought you'd have too much work to do.” he remarks.
you raise your eyebrows at his comment. “well i don't.” you say with a smug smile. “hmm, that's a first.” he mumbles, the joint hanging from his lips, making his words even less clear.
“shut up.” you roll your eyes, frowning slightly. he smirks to himself, leaning forward to get a lighter off the table.
you hesitate slightly, going to sit on the armrest of the sofa. he takes note as he leans back, “you can sit y’know.” he says, bringing the lighter up to the end of his zoot. you sit down, fixing your skirt slightly to be composed on the small surface.
he wastes no time wrapping his arm behind you, his hand gripping onto your hip. you’re a little shocked at the tame yet out in the open pda, but watching chris relax as he inhales the weed makes you realise that it was very possible that he'd done other shit tonight too.
“you want some?” he asks, smoke tumbling out of his mouth as he speaks. you look down at the joint being offered to you, hesitating for a second.
“you can say no, m’not forcing-” you interrupt, pinching it from his hand as you take a toke. he smirks, watching as you smokes. he won't deny, you looked very attractive.
you hand it back, appreciating the burn to the back of your throat at the strength. “good?” he questions your reaction.
“better than any other weed i've smoked.” you answer honestly, taking a sip of your drink, hoping it would soothe your throat, despite the fact it was a vodka-coke.
“that's cos i’ve got good shit.” he says, his face scrunching as he inhales whilst talking. a couple of his friends leave, creating an open space next to chris. he taps the side of your thigh, motioning you to move to sit next to him.
you stand promptly, walking past his spread legs to sit next to him.
“what you drinkin then?” he asks curiously, a little smile on his face like he's teasing you for drinking. “guess.” you respond, holding it out for him to try. he sighs, reluctantly grabbing the cup from your grasp to give into your little game.
he takes a sip, grimacing slightly. “you drink vodka-coke?” he questions, the judgement clear in his voice as he hands the solo cup back. “it's better than doing coke.” you mumble, a stupid jokey remark you were almost embarrassed to say out loud.
he gives you a look, a slightly amused smile on his face. “that was a poor joke.” he tells you, despite the grin on his face. “well, it's true.” you say sharply, giving him a look of disappointment.
he shakes his head with a smile before taking a toke. “since when d’you care bout the drugs i do?” he asks casually, a small frown on his face, contrasting his slight smile.
you could tell he was a little offended, and that he actually didn't like the joke you’d made. you shrug. “i wouldn't say i care, s’just not good for you.”
“hmm.” he nods a little, which was him nicely telling you to fuck off. “so like, you wouldn't let m’do a line off you?” he mumbles, looking over at you with an intense gaze as he takes another puff.
you almost choke on your drink, your eyes wide as he asks. “uh.” you cough a little, composing yourself slightly. “what d’you mean a line- like where on me?” you question, now a little curious at the proposition.
he grins at your response, shrugging. “dunno, between your tits or somethin.” he says casually.
“and how many girls have you done that with?” you question, calling him out a bit.
“between the tits?” he repeats, thinking for a second. “none.” you roll your eyes at the obvious insinuation that he'd done lines off other parts of girls bodies.
“want anymore?” he offers, his eyes now a little more red and sleepy. you take it from him, relaxing back on the couch as you inhale.
“so, s’that a no on the line?” he murmurs, clearly high as a kite as he looks over at you with a lazy smile, subtly holding out a baggie with white powder.
you look over at him in slight disappointment, snatching the baggie from between his fingers as you shove it into his coat pocket. “don't just pull that out.” you panic slightly, not loving how carefree he was sometimes.
he looks around, clicking his tongue against his teeth. “no one here gives a shit.” he grumbles, frowning a little before his gaze meets yours again, his eyes silently asking.
“you actually want to?” you question, not really understanding the point. you take a toke of the zoot after speaking, stubbing the end out into the ashtray on the table.
he shrugs with a small smirk. “why not?” he questions, like he's daring you to do so. you sigh, questioning your own judgement as you actually consider it.
he senses your hesitation, leaning forward a bit as his elbows rest on his knees. “doesn’t have t’be between your tits.” he mumbles, his eyes roaming over your body like he was looking for another spot. “could do it off your thigh.” he suggests, his voice almost hoarse as he speaks, making it very apparent that he himself liked that idea.
you definitely preferred that idea, it seemed like less of a hassle. maybe it was the mixture of the alcohol and the weed, clouding your judgement, but you were down to do that. “m’kay.” you mumble, giving in. it's not like you yourself were gonna do a line.
he nods a little, almost proud of you for saying yes and venturing out a bit. then he stands, offering his hand to you before he leads you through the house, your delicate hand gripping onto his more rough one as you tag along behind him.
he took you to an upstairs bathroom, letting you shut and lock the door behind you. you turn and he's already got the baggie out, holding it open. “shut the lid, n’sit.” he tells you, motioning towards the toilet.
you do as told, mindlessly chucking your bag onto the floor before you take a seat on the closed toilet lid, the plastic cold against your upper thighs.
“this is so stupid.” you mumble, feeling a little nervous. “and pointless.” you add, watching as he sorts out his shit.
“nah, it's hot.” he corrects, walking over to you before he gets on his knees in front of you. he holds his id card against your thigh, almost creating a barrier before he sprinkles a small line over your skin.
you watch intensely, feeling your heart rate spike at the sheer adrenaline of the situation.
“don't move.” he tells you, using the edge of the card to straighten out the line a little. you take in a small breath, trying your hardest to remain completely still.
he puts the baggie and his card away, looking up to see your slightly nervous expression. “you good?” he asks, his hand coming to gently rub your other thigh. you nod a little. “can you just do it, i'm scared i'm gonna flinch or move or something.” you say quickly, clearly quite stressed about the prospect of spilling the expensive substance on your thigh.
he chuckles slightly at your panic, more calm as he trusted that you wouldn't move. but he complies, reaching into his back pocket for a dollar bill.
he rolls it into a tube before leaning over slightly as he brings it to one nostril, pressing the other with his finger. you feel the dollar bill touch you slightly, before he runs it along the line, snorting the coke.
he's quick to tip his head back, his face scrunching as he sniffs, making sure it's all in.
your grip on the side of the toilet seat loosens slightly, as the muscles in your thigh relax. you look over at him as he puts the bill away, sniffling a little as it passes. then your gaze shifts to the tiny trace of the substance on your thigh, a miniscule amount left.
he pops his thumb into his mouth before collecting the remainder on your skin. “you want it?” he offers, although he's not expecting you to say yes. you shake your head. “how are you meant to snort that?” you question.
he smirks before sucking it off his thumb and then wiping it clean on his jeans. “like that.” he says, watching as you look at him curiously. “huh.” you mumble.
“s’not a lot, won't do much.” he shrugs, before looking back up at you.
neither of you move as his gaze shifts over your body, specifically at your exposed thighs and short denim skirt.
the coke was obviously getting to him as his gaze became fixed and concentrated, whereas your mind was spinning slightly. you were minorly cross faded, making you more brave than usual, as demonstrated by that little performance you just took part in.
“what kinda underwear d’ya wear.” he mumbles, his eyes not leaving your thighs. you smile at his question, finding amusement and confidence in the fact that he thought about that kinda stuff.
instead of answering you begin to part your legs, revealing your black lacy underwear, the material only partially see through.
his mind blanks at your action, his mouth filling with saliva as he admires the view and boldness. “you wear lacy shit?” he questions, his voice hoarse and lustful. “only when i dress up.” you respond with a smile, looking down at his reaction.
“looks fuckin sexy.” he mumbles, moving his hand forward to lightly brush his fingers over the fabric, feeling the slight dampness.
his head falls against your thigh at the feeling of how wet you are, his other hand gripping your calf. “fuck.” he groans, keeping his fingers there.
he looks up at you eventually, his eyes heavy. “d’you have any idea how wet y’are?” he mumbles. you nod with a small smile, basking in how much it was sending him over the edge.
he refrains from moaning again, instead returning his attention back to the heat between your legs. you gently play with his hair as you watch his fixation. “can i?” he murmurs.
you don’t even know what he's asking, but you’re quick to respond. “yeah.” you whisper, catching your bottom lip between your teeth.
he pushes the bottom of your skirt up, watching as it bunches at your hips. then he hooks his fingers into your underwear, tugging it down your legs. you lift your hips up, helping him, and that's all the confirmation he needs to know you’re more than ok with this.
he separates your legs, admiring your naked form. “fuck-” he whispers, reaching out to touch you, sliding his fingers through your folds. you slouch back, looking down at the movement of his hands. you keep an eye on where his hands are going, almost waiting for him to do something.
his middle finger moves lower, gently prodding at your entrance. you flinch slightly at the new feeling.
“you still not into me fingerin you?” he questions, fixated on the way the tip of his finger slipped in slightly. “you can.” you breathe out, suddenly desperate to feel him. maybe it was your intoxication talking, but either way you knew you wanted chris, you just struggled to rationalise and vocalise it to him.
“you sure?” he asks, tilting his head up to look at you. you nod eagerly, opening your legs a little wider to give him access.
he wastes no time slowing pushing his finger in before gently twisting his wrist to get the right angle. you bask in the new sensation, never having had anything up there. then he speeds up quickly, curling his finger up into your g-spot.
“oh fuck-” you gasp, your body tensing slightly at the intense pleasure. he concentrates on the rhythm of his arm, making sure to hit the spot inside you perfectly.
“can't lie, i really wanna go down on you.” he murmurs breathlessly, clearly overcome with lust in the moment.
“what..?” you mumble out, returning to reality for a second as you focus your eyes on his face, and the desperate expression on it.
“y’know, when you give a girl head-.” he explains with a sly grin. you shake your head quickly. “fuck off.” you scowl at his sarcasm. “i mean like, right here?” you raise your eyebrows as you question.
he looks over your body, your legs spread for him, exposing yourself at almost eye level. “well, i mean…” he raises an eyebrow, making a point about the position you were in right now.
you think for a second, looking over the situation. he senses the hesitation, bringing his hand to gently rub your thigh. “it’ll feel real good. promise.” he tells you, venturing closer.
your heart rate picks up as he brings his face closer to your heat, a peak in anxiety and insecurity as no ones been that close to you like that before. but all that vanishes as his tongue presses over your sensitive clit, making your body jerk in pleasure.
“mghh..” you groan, threading your fingers through his hair. he gets the message, immediately going all in, circling his tongue over your clit expertly, his hand still gripping your thigh.
“you're really good at that.” you croak out, your mouth momentarily falling open at the feeling. he smirks against you, concentrating on the task at hand as he soaks in the praise.
after a few minutes of the delicate touch of his tongue, he shifts so that he can hold both your thighs, pulling you closer to his face. for comfort you end up mindlessly resting your legs over his shoulders as he goes in further, sucking and nipping at your clit.
it makes your back arch, chris holding down your hips with his hands. “fuck-” you moan, your voice cut off by a gasp as he gently slips a finger in.
you sit up a little, looking down at him with an already fucked out expression. “wait- i’m gonna cum if you do that.” he removes his mouth, looking up at you curiously, “is that not the point?” he taunts, his finger slowly moving in and out of you.
“yeah, but i'll be too loud.” you whimper, reminding the both of you where you were, anyone could be outside that door waiting for the toilet.
his smirk only widens at your admission, “be quiet then.” he ushers before his lips connect with your clit again. he leaves you with no time to dispute before gasps and whines are tumbling out of your mouth again.
he's quick to match the pace of his finger with the movement of his tongue, applying more pressure to your sensitive nerve as his finger hits your g-spot repeatedly.
you grip onto his hand that's still on your thigh, holding tightly as you try to make less noise.
from the constant simultaneous stimulation you feel, waves of pleasure coarse through your body, digging your nails into his skin as your orgasm builds up.
“gonna come.” you squeak, trying your best to stay silent. you resolve to covering your mouth with your hand, poorly muffling your moans as your high hits. he looks up at you from his position between your legs, not wanting to miss the sight of you coming undone from his touch.
your hips desperately grind forward onto chris's mouth as you come, his movements slowing to a reasonable pace. he removes his mouth, watching his finger pump in and out slowly as your body shakes and you come down from your orgasm, eventually pulling his finger out.
once you've calmed down, he gently removes your legs from his shoulders, planting your feet on the floor.
“holy fuck.” you breathe out, almost in shock from how good that felt. he basks in your orgasmic haze, loving how good he made you feel. “you taste really good.” he comments, sucking your slick off his middle finger.
“don't do that- that's disgusting.” you mutter, frowning judgmentally.
“what?” he chuckles, amused by your reaction. “i just had m’tongue on your pussy.” he points out. you grimace a little, despite the truth of it. “don't say it like that.” you mumble, shaking your head slightly with the same disgusted look on your face.
he rolls his eyes playfully as he stands up, “you're ridiculous.” he tells you before he goes to wash his hands.
you sit up, your legs a little shaky as you pick your underwear off the floor, stepping into them. you stand, pulling them up before fixing your skirt.
“you good?” he asks, leaning against the counter as you sort your stuff. before you can answer there's a bang on the door followed by a loud voice telling you to hurry up.
your eyes go wide, and you want nothing more than to curl up into a ball and hide. “chris, i can't go out there.” you whisper, picking your bag off the floor.
“s’fine.” he says, like that's supposed to just reassure you completely. he saunters to the door, unlocking it and pulling it open almost theatrically.
chris daps the guy up, and from the friendly interaction you can tell it's one of his friends.
“you guys hookin up?” he asks, looking between the both of you with a grin, his gaze remaining on your legs for far too long.
“nah, just doin the usual.” chris says, subtly wiping his nose as he speaks. the guy's eyebrows raise before he looks over at you again. “you do coke?” he questions, clearly surprised.
you go to respond, your words getting caught in your throat. but it doesn't matter because chris is already talking. “she did a bump, wanted to try it.” chris says, leaning closer to the guy as he speaks.
then chris's arm wraps around your waist, pulling you further away from the bathroom. “see ya around.” chris says to the guy, before pushing you so that you were now walking in front of him, a part of you thinking he did it to block the view of your ass from his friend.
“you okay?” he asks you, walking behind you as you descend the stairs with slightly shaky legs. “fuck off.” you tell him, trying to act like he hadn't just made your legs complete jelly.
he chuckles a little at your attitude, holding his hands up in surrender. “m’just asking.” he mumbles, a grin on his face.
you both reach the bottom of the stairs and you turn to look at him. “well i'm fine.” you hum before looking down at your unstable legs. “my legs are just a bit shaky.” you mumble under your breath.
his eyebrows raise a little, his own cockiness taking over. “oh really, why's that?” he asks, leaning on the bannister with a sly knowing smirk.
you roll your eyes, not wanting to feed into his ego further, although to be fair that may have been the best orgasm of your life.
“why'd you always ruin it?” you huff, moving to stand in front of him, his arm still over the bannister. “m’not ruining nothin.” he mumbles, pressing his lips together as he pulls you in by your hip.
your bodies are flush, and you can feel his steady heartbeat against your own chest, a contrast to yours. you look around at the crowds of people, some in conversation, others walking past the both of you to go upstairs. “you sure you wanna be seen like this with me?” you question, taking note of the increased pda when he's coked.
he pouts, a soft frown forming on his face. “what's that meant to mean?” he mumbles, although he knows exactly what you mean.
“we just look very couply right now.” you point out, looking at the lack of space between your bodies. he shrugs like it's nothing, but you know it is.
“so, we're just two people havin fun at a party.” he says, his other hand coming up to brush a strand of hair out of your face, tentatively tucking it behind your ear. “just cos we look couply, dont mean we are.” he adds.
“m’kay.” you mumble, just accepting his silly answer. “what?” he questions, frowning down at your change in expression.
“nothing.” you say, spreading a smile across your face to reassure him. “s’not nothin, what’d i say?” he asks, his hand now playing with the ends of your hair although his gaze is focussed on your eyes, following their every move.
you sigh, unsure of what to even say. “it's just-” you're cut off by him kissing you, his hands gripping your face to hold you in place. the kiss is hot, but softer than usual. his tongue isn't licking across your lip like usual, instead it's just the soft plush of his own lips. the intensity is there, it's just not in the action, rather in the emotion. which scares you a little.
he pulls away, pressing a soft peck to your lips. “stop thinkin so much.” he tells you with a small smile, rubbing his hand over your cheek.
you look up, into his eyes, aware of how adoring your gaze must be right now. “sorry.” you mumble out, drawing your eyes away from his.
“you're good.” he says shortly, before he kisses her head. you feel cold as soon as he's no longer touching you.
“i'm gonna go find bella.” you tell him, taking a little step away trying to keep it casual after that interaction. he nods, looking around a little. “i'll see you later then?” he says. you nod before parting ways.
you watch him walk away, letting out a breath you were unknowingly holding. fuck.
©sturnsrecord
notes . reupload from my previous account @/plan8sturn, I will be continuing the series here
#sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturiolo fanfic#sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#nick sturniolo#sturniolo#chris sturniolo#★sturnsrecord#★ctmw
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ALL’S FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR - LN4
↳ pt.3
summary : Feelings are complicated and you and Lando aren’t a great mix to express them. A tension filled boat that leads to sexual chemistry so thick that you end up in the same bed.
og summary : Its the vacation of your dreams! With your best friends, rich men, live music, and flowing drinks, nothing can ruin it. Even if a certain Formula 1 driver (who seems to have an affinity for annoying you) is there every step of the sandy way.
listen up : ho this is long. suggestive comments!! hope you like part three!!! muah! previous part
word count : 4142
⋆。‧˚⋆
“Boat day! Boat day!” Alex chants while walking down the dock with Lily on his shoulders. I woke up to over a hundred texts to get to the dock with a swimsuit and sunscreen.
Charles’ friend doesn’t just have a boat he has a fucking yacht. It’s not gigantic but it’s definitely the nicest boat I've ever seen. “Uh Charles… you do know how to drive this, right?”
Alexandra shares my worried stare as Lando and Carlos race each other onto it. Kika throws her arm around me and grins as we walk onto the back. There’s four steps and my jaw drops as we go ‘inside’.
There’s a huge couch that turns into a dining area, a TV, followed by a small kitchen. Kika and I hurry to the front where there’s one day bed that shaded and one in the very front that’s for tanning.
Apparently there’s three bedrooms and two bathrooms! “I think I need a yacht.” I say to Kika as we check out the table and chairs on the side.
She looks like a mermaid today, in a bright blue bikini and sparkly nail polish. I’ve taken more of a siren route in dark red.
I’m all for woman doing things in ‘male’ fields, but I let the men figure out how to get the boat working. Alexandra, Lily, Kika, Rebecca and I, put our things down in one of the rooms and make our way to the Bow where the sun is hitting us perfectly.
Rebecca pulls off her shirt to reveal a light pink one piece while Lily runs over with a speaker in a multicolored bikini. We start blasting Dominic fine as Charles evidently figured the boat out, and we start to leave.
The moment we only see clear blue water, the girls turn to me. I’m laid out on the tanning bed, sunnies on and fully ready to take a sunny nap, but Rebecca pokes me.
“So, you and Lando are still alive!” She says the obvious as I sit up and lean against my arms, “How’d it go!?”
I want to tell them everything. I want to tell them that It was genuinely fun and I had a great time and i’ve never laughed harder, but I can’t. I shrug, “It was okay.”
Alex eyes me, “Just… okay?”
I nod, “He fucked up my plan so we didn’t go anything crazy and we got kicked out of a pottery place.”
Kika perks up at this, “Pottery? Did he do that thing like how the movie stars do it?” She gets behind Lily as they start to recreate those weird sexual pottery scenes.
I roll my eyes, “No. Like I said, we got kicked out. Then we just went to the hotel and split up.”
Lily frowns, “Lando said you two got a drink.”
Shit. “Oh right, I went to sleep pretty early.”
Kika groans and falls down next to me, “So nothing happened at all? No flirting, no kissing?”
Lots of flirting and fuck yes kissing!
I love my friends, and I trust them! I just don’t trust them to not tell their boyfriends. “Did you have this ‘couples day’ just so Lando and I would have a chance of hooking up?”
Lily leans in, “So is there a chance!?”
I look at all of them to make sure everyone is listening, “No chance! I told you I wanted to have a fun vacation which does not include you trying to set me up!”
Rebecca slouches a bit, “You’re right.”
“Sorry.” Alex mumbles, “We just feel bad.”
“It’s not your fault i’m single and you’re not.” I stand, “I’m going to get some water.”
My plan to hide away on the couch is immediately ruined by Lando taking up the whole thing. He’s scrolling on his phone, shirt and shoes off.
I turn quickly and go downstairs, running into Pierre, “Hey Y/n! Looking for something?”
“Uh… water?”
There’s a little mini fridge that he pulls a bottle from, “You okay?” Pierre is sweet and it makes me happy for Kika.
“Yeah!” I open the bottle and drink.
“Just that… Lando told us what happened.” I choke on the water, coughing as his eyes get panicked, “What!?”
“Are you- Uh… He just said that you two ended the night weird. We all thought it would magically turn you into friends but I guess not.” Fucking hell he just scared me so bad.
“Oh! Right… I guess some things just aren’t meant to be.” So everyone was rooting for us to become friends yesterday?
Pierre just shrugs and moves past me, walking up the stairs without another word.
⋆༺
LANDO
I’m playing poker with my friends while the girls dance around the front deck. We’re anchored on the water and after an hour of swimming, we all needed to pause.
I’m shit at poker but it doesn’t matter because i’m already distracted by the shadow of a girl through the window.
I kissed her. I kissed her and she’s avoiding me.
I think i’m an idiot but I know i’m not because anyone smart would fall for her. Not that I'm in love or anything, I’m just… intrigued?
“Lan?” Alex kicks me under the table, “What’s got you so uninterested in money?”
I just shake my head and look back down at my cards, “Something happened, didn’t it?” Pierre asks, clocking my weird mood. “With Y/n.”
“No.” She would kill me if I told, and I already said too much by drunkenly explaining that the night did not end well to Alex and Lily.
They would definitely tell their girlfriends, so I keep my mouth shut, “You’re a shit liar.” Carlos says, “But whatever, None of my business.”
Charles frowns, “Totally our business! We all love Y/n and want to know what happened!”
“Nothing happened.” I shake my head, taping a chip against the table, “Drop it.”
Just then, Y/n walks in while clutching her hand, her face scrunched up, “I need a bandaid asap.” Charles stands quickly and grabs the first aid kit from a cabinet, “Your girlfriend pushed me off the boat!” She points to Pierre who cringes.
She’s soaking wet, her hair dripping water onto the floor as she crosses her legs. She's in a red bikini and I think I might faint.
I instantly feel bad when I remember her hand is bleeding and i’m just checking her out. Kika runs in, “I’m so sorry, Y/n!”
Y/n just shakes her head, walking over to the kitchen and washing off her hand, wincing at the pain, “Don’t worry It’s just a scratch, i’m just joking.”
I stand and walk over, looking over the sink to get a better look at her hand. She’s got a cut along the side of her hand, bloody and sort of gross. “You sure you’re okay?”
She nods without saying anything, just turning to Charles who has his kit ready.
I bite my lip and sort of awkwardly walk towards Carlos who’s already watching me. “The fuck did you do?”
⋆༺
YOU
Besides my little incident with my hand, I’m having a great time.
Charles drives us to a secluded area with caves which you can swim in. I personally stay out in the open air but Rebecca, Pierre, Charles, and Alexandra check them out.
I sit in a tube with my head tilted back and my hair floating around me. My stomach and chest are warm while my back is cold against the water.
Someone dives in near me and I can hear my laughing as they jump and flip off the boat. I regret opening my eyes as soon as I do because I catch Lando back flipping off the boat.
It’s one of those moments where I don’t remember why I don’t like him. I suppose that’s not as true now, but seeing him flip off is still hot as hell.
I end up dunking and swimming back to the boat, sitting on the back where my feet dangle in the water. I know Lando’s the one walking down and sitting next to me before I see him.
“Hey.” He sounds nervous and quick.
“Hi.” I stand and walk up the stairs, screwing up my face and mentally yelling at myself. I hide in the kitchen, grabbing some fruit before venturing out to sit with Lily and Alex.
They’re all cuddled up and giggling so I spare them my company and sit at the table on the side of the boat.
The music is quiet and I can hear my friends talking across the boat. I bite into a strawberry and stare at the water below.
My anxiety is through the roof and i’m on a boat in fucking turkey. I’m annoyed that Lando just being near me is making me on edge.
As if he heard me, his head pokes out from behind the door, his hair wet and his eyes shining. “We’re gonna take off soon. Might wanna hold on cause of Charles’ driving.”
“Ok.” It’s like I can’t control my feet. I just stand and walk past him, giving him a quick smile and leaving him.
I then interrupt Alex and Lily, loudly stepping down the steps so they sit up. I hear everyone else getting out of the water and Lily can tell something wrong immediately.
“Could you get me some water?” She turns to Alex who gives her a quizzical look.
“You can’t do it yours-” She gives him another look which he immediately understands. Alex leaves quickly and Lily hurries over to me. I sit with my knees to my chest as she puts her hand on my arm.
“What happened? For real this time, what’s wrong?”
I look up at her, our friends walking past and up to the kitchen. I try to say it but I just groan and shove my face into my knees, “Y/n!”
I mumble it but she pokes my face so I look back up at her. I take a breath and force it out, “Lando kissed me.” And then she screams.
I shove my hand over her mouth so fast that her scream is muffled. We practically wrestle as she tries to get my hand free, “Lily!” She licks my hand and I gasp, pulling it off her.
“I’ll stop! I’ll stop!” She shuts her mouth and sits on her feet, staring at me, “We saw him last night… He looked drunk and completely in a different world.”
I groan into my hands, laying back on the cushion, “We were drunk! Sort of… We had a great day and it was actually fun like the type of thing friends do.” she nods at my words, “But then we were on the beach drinking and joking and he just… kissed me.”
Lily leans in, whispering, “Did you kiss him back?”
I bite my lip at the memory, nodding slowly. She screams again. I lay face down on the cushion as she taps my shoulder repeatedly and the boat starts to move. “Was it like a peck or make out?”
My cheeks get red so she already knows the answer, “Who stopped it?”
“Me? I think.”
“Did you like it?”
“Yes… God, Lily!” she’s smiling at me again, “He’s a good kisser. Also please don’t tell anyone! Especially the girls. I just don’t want it getting around or making anything awkward.”
“Of course I won’t! Even Alex, I promise.” she attaches her pinky to mine and grins, “I have so many questions and we will talk about this later but I have one thing I need to ask.”
I sigh, “Go ahead.”
“Do you want it to happen again?” I think I'm going to be sick.
⋆༺
LANDO
I find Lily and Y/n at the front, Y/n looks panicked at my appearance. “Can I talk to you?” She looks at me, then Lily.
I actually think she’s going to jump off the boat to avoid talking to me. But instead she goes for a quicker route, “I gotta pee.” I roll my eyes as she runs inside, slipping a bit at the wet deck.
Lily and I both watch her run, she just blinks and shrugs, “Good luck with that one.” She probably told Lily and it’s making me ultra aware that she knows I kissed her friend.
I settle back inside on the couch, listening to Charles tell a story while my eyes are completely distracted by Y/n laughing with her friends and eating raspberries.
I need to talk to her. She’s got a good poker face when she isn’t blushing and it’s practically impossible to get her alone.
“What about you, Lando? The only single one left!” Alex laughs and nudges my arm.
I laugh awkwardly, “Right.” I know the girls can hear this and I don’t want it to continue.
“So… how many models are you talking to?” Carlos asks as I scratch the back of my neck.
I shift my gaze to Y/n, who’s looks frustratingly good with her back arched, her elbows on the counter, and her eyes trying not to meet mine.
I run my tongue over my teeth and look back at Carlos, “You really wanna make that joke when your girlfriends a model, Sainz?” His face drops immediately and he punches my arm.
Charles and Pierre are crying laughing, “You two really wanna laugh?” They shut up real quick which makes me hear Y/n’s laugh.
It makes me smile and as soon as I realize why, I stop. “What about that girl you were debating on bringing?” Pierre snaps back fast.
“Hey, I was drunk and-”
“Pussy whipped!” Pierre coughs as Kika throws a raspberry at his head.
My friends start a new conversation (per the girls request) and move it out to the deck, Charles and Pierre arguing in french while they drive. I watch Y/n excuse herself and slip inside, and I follow.
I corner her outside the bathroom, her hands brushing through her half dried hair. She freezes, “Excuse me.”
She tries to walk past but I don’t let her. “Did I overstep?” She looks at me confused still, “Because I feel like an asshole.”
“No… You didn’t overstep.”
I groan, placing my hand next to her head against the wall, “So then talk to me.”
She crosses her arms, “I don’t want to.”
“Tough shit. You kissed me back.”
“I wish I didn’t.” She’s not looking me in my eyes and I haven’t been able to forget how she kissed me so I know she’s lying.
I step closer, “Try again, pretty.”
She looks up at me, her mouth pouty and her eyes big. “It was a mistake…”
I frown, “Mistakes can happen more than once.”
“Not this kind.” She lets out a breath, “I can’t stand you.”
“So use me.”
She opens her mouth, then shuts it. Y/n bites her lip and it takes everything in me not to physically whine. “You’re not mine to use.”
“I’m offering.”
“I’m rejecting.” that hurts way more than I expected.
“I’ll get on my knees.” Her hand goes to my arm that’s braced against the wall, her touch is soft and makes me weak.
I swallow and she clocks it instantly. “Go on, then.” I think I'm dreaming, but I’m not one to pinch myself.
I slowly sink to my knees, my hand trailing down the side of her body. I didn’t think she’d say yes. Right here? Where anyone could find us? I’ve never been more down for anything in my entire life.
She smiles, cute and innocent as if i’m not kneeling in front of her. God she’s beautiful. Her tanned leg moves to my shoulder and just as I think she’s about to pull me in, she shoves me back down.
I stare at her from my new place on the floor, her smile much wider now. She gets down to my level as I try to pull myself back up, she pushes me back down. “In your dreams, Norris.”
I breathe out as she walks up the stairs, my view cushioning the embarrassment I feel, “Trust me, you will be.”
⋆༺
YOU
My lovely friends have decided to have another lovely couples night. I honestly am excited to have a moment of peace after today's day.
I get all dressed up in my favorite outfit. A red cocktail dress that fits like a glove, white heels, and my hair wavy and salty.
I’m in a great mood, it’s the type of mood where i’m avoiding everything but am by the ocean so I can’t be sad! Everything is nice and well until I get turned away at the restaurant.
It’s the one place close to the hotel that I haven’t been, “I’m sorry, there just isn’t any table for tonight.”
So it appears that every single person has decided to settle down and wallow in self pity at this restaurant, “Please!”
“I’m sorry, we just can’t have you sit unless you have another-”
I hear him swear before I see him. He’s dressed up too, arguing with another waiter as he sets eyes on me, “Great.”
Lando’s face below me flashes in my mind as he looks at me as if he wishes I was anybody else, “I’ll eat with her.”
“Don’t seem so happy.” I cross my arms, my clutch in my hand as he walks closer.
“My beautiful date.” The word beautiful makes me drop my annoyed expression and I'm lucky he’s looking at the hostess, “One table, for two, please.”
We’re shown our table, given water and ordered drinks, but I refuse to talk first. Lando seems to have the same idea, sipping his drink and looking out at the dark water.
Still, He clears his throat and looks at me. His jacket is hung over the chair, a curl falling just perfectly down, and with his green eyes in the moonlight, he looks like a prince.
“Have a good day, pretty?”
“Are you small talking me now, Norris?”
His brow quirks as he brings his glass to his lips, “You’ve been ignoring me all day, what else am I supposed to say? Would you rather me beg?”
Maybe I would. “I saw Kika push you into the water today. You hit your head?” I fake pity, pouting.
“I must have because suddenly I'm imagining a very pretty girl run her very pretty hands through my hair.” He sits up straighter, “Hm… must be the head injury.”
I thought I would be more upset because of our dining situation. But I find myself smiling as he teases me. We order and he does the oddest thing… he starts asking me about my life.
“I know you. I’ve been around you. I’ve kissed you. Yet I don’t even know where you live.” I’m surprised but should I be? Just because I didn’t like him, doesn’t mean I didn’t laugh at his jokes.
So we start talking. And for about an hour and a half, it’s all we do. We talk with a side of food and a beautiful view. We talk about Formula 1, we talk about my work, we talk about my hair, we talk about his family.
He asks me about my pets and he doesn’t complain when I make a jab at his food which is plain as can be.
It’s the first time that I really believe we could be friends. It’s when I truly see the potential that my friends have seen. “We were too alike.” I snap my fingers together, swirling my pasta, “That’s why I hated you.”
“So you hated yourself? That’s quite harsh, pretty.” He’s finished his food, and is lounging in his chair. The restaurant is almost empty, we could sit wherever we’d like and leave too, but I keep talking.
“No. I mean you just clashed with me because two of the same personality is too much.”
“I think I think ‘too much’. Has me enjoying our date.”
I shake my head, “Not a date.”
“Totally a date.” He winks and I drop the subject.
“I think I didn’t like you because I liked you.” He says it so casually that I almost don’t understand it.
“What?”
“I really like you.” He nods and I wonder how many glasses of wine he’s had, “Y/n, i’m not drunk. I’m just honest. Don’t freak out i’m not gonna get down on one knee…” this makes him smirk, “Or two!”
“You can’t just dislike someone because you fancy them!”
“I don’t fancy you! I just… like you. I like the way you are around me and I really liked messing with you. You’re easy to frustrate.”
“I am not!” He raises a brow and I shut my mouth.
“Let’s get going… everyone’s party already at the beach club. You wouldn’t want to miss your local lovers.”
“Um… are you dining and dashing? We have to pay.” He scoffs. Actually scoffs at me!
“I already did. Come on.” He takes my bag and walks out.
At my request, Mamma mia plays from his phone as we walk down the path next to the beach. I spin around with my heels in my hand and my hair in my face. “Why can’t I live on an island!?”
“Why can’t you?”
I eye him, “I’ll live on an island when you buy me one.”
“Woah- I bought you dinner and you just started to tolerate me… Save the island for next week.” I smile and almost trip over something that hisses.
“Aw!” I practically scream and kneel down to it. It’s a tiny cat, orange and brown and rubbing against my outstretched hand, “Oh my god!”
“It’s gonna bite you.” I just roll my eyes and tug at his pant leg to join me.
The cat takes to him immediately, rubbing up against his leg and clawing up to his chest. I laugh as it falls off and comes back to me, “Cutie…”
I scratch its ear with my nicely done nails which he clearly appreciates. He starts licking my hand and I wish I had something to feed him. A small smile settles on my lips as the cool breeze brushes back my hair.
I look up to see Lando staring at me. “I really did mean it, when I said you were beautiful.” I feel a little sick at his words. The good kind of sick. The butterflies kind of sick.
The cat runs away when someone joins us on the path and I stand with him, “We should hurry, party time.”
⋆༺
LANDO
She left her purse in my room. We were heading back and I had to put down my jacket so we stopped in my room.
She left her bag which explains why she’s standing at my door in a matching pajama set and hotel slippers on her feet
“I need my mints.” She pushes past me and looks around for it. I help her because I have no idea where she put it either.
She had guys buy her drinks all night. You have no idea how much it killed me to see them all over her as if she wasn’t having dinner with me an hour before.
“Your room is a mess.” she says as she tears apart my nicely made bed.
“You’re tipsy, huh?”
She giggles as I lean against the door frame. She falls on my bed and looks up at the ceiling, “Guys love me!”
I shake my head and yawn. I finally find her bag, it’s in the bathroom for some reason and when I come back into my room to hand her it, she’s passed out on my bed.
“Y/n!” I shake her a bit but she only slaps my hand away, “You are so close to being in the correct bed! I found your purse.”
Her eyes open slightly, then she rolls over and moans louder, “Shh!” Then she’s out like a light. I hear her soft breathing and rustling around as I give up and sit next to her.
“I’m not sleeping on the couch!” I tell her but I know she’s already asleep.
She looks oddly peaceful. She looks tan and happy, even asleep on my bed. I accept my fate quicker than I probably should have, “Goodnight, then, pretty.” Flipping off the lights and pulling the blanket over her, I slip next to her and push a pillow in between us.
I don’t want her to wake up screaming after all.
I see her outline in the dark, the weight of someone sharing my bed, and the smell of her perfume I know is going to be there tomorrow. I see her, and curse myself.
She really is beautiful.
#fanfic#formula 1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fic#lando norris fanfic#lando norris#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando norris angst#lando norris fluff
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Thanks for the tag!! Hmm silly lore tidbits
1. When I was younger my mom took me to a psychologist apparently because I was bad at social interaction and I ended up going to some counselor thing?? Weekly for a while and I don’t even remember what the actual goal was I just remember she’d show me videos, ask me “what does this character feel?” And ask me to emulate the facial expression of that emotion LMAOO (I rarely did it because I thought it was embarrassing)
2. I have a large scar on my left calf because of a mosquito bite I got as a child that swelled up a really large size (might be post inflammatory hyperpigmentation cuz some tiny mosquito bites I for a few months ago also left dark spots on my skin)
3. I took piano lessons for at least 6 years as a kid before I quit at 12/13 years old but I’m only officially ABRSM grade 2. I never took it seriously haha and especially during the later years I’d just chat with the teacher half the lesson and ask her about interesting medical cases (which she somehow knew about for some reason) partly out of genuine curiosity and partly to avoid playing the piano for as long as possible
4. I was a very late walker! My parents had to hold my hands on either side to keep me upright to walk into kindergarten interviews because I couldn’t actually walk properly myself lol
Tagging mutuals (we actually have a lot of the same mutuals 💀💀) (do it only if you wanna haha no pressure) @irunaki @milwkwyxd @lankanweirdo @honest-khmyh @sevensees7
it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore
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CHAPTER 3 | ALL OUT OF LUCK
w.c. 4.0k (i know)
tags. fem!reader, pro-hero!katsuki, aged-up (26), much cussing, some adult themes (again, no smut y'all), bkg and reader go through one stage of grief: bargaining, the plot thickens!
a/n. wrote all this in one day—i couldn't put the doc down until i finished it. this chapter is jam-packed and has lots going on, but we're only at the beginning. i hope you have as much fun reading it as i did writing it!
links. masterlist, ao3 (coming soon)
“…Though I trust you’ll understand if we set some—” he pauses, and you’re 99% sure it’s for dramatic effect, “—precautionary measures in place?”
“Waddya have in mind?” asks Bakugou, his rough tone laced with unmistakable skepticism.
“Well, for starters…”
Their leader glances back at the bionic woman. “Sayaka, are they ready?”
Sayaka nods. “Ready for installation, Masaki-san.”
You scramble to take a mental note of their names—as well as try to ignore the fact that the robotic girl sounds like a robot, too—as you watch Masaki gesture to the escort from earlier who’s standing at the sides and in the shadows.
He emerges into the dim lights with a wide stride, but to your surprise, another leg steps forward right beside him. Your eyes trail up until they land on the other person, widening in confusion because they look just like a carbon copy of the intimidating escort—tall, ginger head, pale skin—only it’s a girl.
There’s no mistaking it.
They’re twins.
Twin bodyguards. In a quirk supremacist group.
You fight the urge to let out a dry laugh.
But apparently, neither of the two finds the situation funny, because they’re nothing but serious as they approach Masaki and bow politely, before heading to Sayaka and taking what looks like tiny…metal pieces?
You don’t get the opportunity to wonder about what those were, though, because, in the blink of an eye, the twins are already stalking straight toward you and Bakugou, glaring daggers.
“Those are bugs,” Masaki explains just as the twins arrive right in front of you, with the guy from earlier towering over Bakugou and the female staring you down a few inches away from your face, decidedly a little too close for comfort. You barely manage to stop yourself from gulping and looking away.
“They’ll be tracking your speech and movements 24/7. And don’t worry, they’re waterproof.”
You sense Bakugou’s about to spit some smart-ass comment, judging by the way he puffs up like he tends to do when he’s about to drop a curse-riddled quip, but he doesn’t get the chance to deliver the blow because the twins are on you in an instant.
You accidentally let out a yelp as the woman grabs the hem of your tank top so roughly you think it’s gonna tear, before she stuffs her right hand up. Mortified, you struggle against her hold, but her left has a death grip on you.
“Relax,” she seethes, obviously very much already done with you. “I’m just installing it.”
At her words, you manually will yourself to calm down, and it quickly dawns on you that she’s not touching you violently or inappropriately. You tamp down a shiver as her cold fingers come into contact with the center of your chest, right at the dip of your bra and between your breasts, feeling the surface before sticking something that you promptly identify as the tracker.
And as she retracts her hand and steps away from you, right at the same time as her twin like they’re wired for synchrony, you reflect on how it’s so light that you barely feel an added weight to your body. It’s circular, too, and you debate for a second whether or not to peer down at your chest to see what it really looks like, before ultimately deciding against it.
You can do that later, in the privacy of the (hopefully not downstairs) bathroom.
If such a concept even exists.
“Thanks, you two,” comes Masaki’s gentle voice, before shifting to regard you and Bakugou. “You can get to know your designated guards later on, but for now, let’s continue.”
As if on cue, the twins take a further step back before eventually returning to their dark corner.
“What we just affixed on your chests are special devices, again, designed to monitor any sound you make as well as your specific locations. They’re not your ordinarily engineered trackers—they’re Sayaka’s thanks to her quirk—which also allows her to directly receive the feedback and project it for others to see and hear.”
Ah.
You don’t know how that works exactly, but you bet the expensive ass perfume that you got for your birthday last year—the very one you wear for special occasions like now—that it’s got something to do with her robotic parts.
“Does everyone in your group get one, too?” questions Bakugou, who’s now looking a bit miffed. You’re sure he didn’t enjoy getting felt up by a stranger who he just called someone’s little lackey.
“Only the new members,” Sayaka answers succinctly, her voice sounding like it’s filtered with autotune.
But especially you two, you finish for her in your head. And really, you can’t blame them. Taking in a pro-hero, let alone Japan’s #2, is a huge gamble, and Bakugou quite literally can make or break their whole plan to attack. This level of precaution is not at all uncalled for. You’d even go so far as to say it’s not enough.
Bakugou must be thinking the same thing, too, because he doesn’t offer a follow-up question.
Masaki takes your silence as a sign for him to go on.
“Of course, that’s only the first layer of protection.”
Shit.
You hope you didn’t just think that into existence.
The plain-looking leader puts on that prudent smile of his, before turning to look at the old man. “Kouki-san here has a very handy quirk. Teleportation,” he glances at Bakugou, “A sought-after power in the hero world, isn’t it?”
Bakugou shrugs, although you’re guessing the answer is yes and that he’s just too stubborn to admit it.
Figures.
“Well, he’s gone and mastered his quirk, and has since been indispensable to our organization. Essentially—” Masaki huffs, like he’s preparing for the bomb he’s about to drop, “—the very moment you even hint at betraying us, we’re gone,” he snaps his fingers, “Just like that. And you won’t be able to trace us.”
“Really?” drawls Bakugou. “You’ll abandon this cushy, not at all seedy ass headquarters of yours?”
“This is only one of many, Dynamight,” Masaki responds, seemingly unbothered by Bakugou’s taunt. “And this is actually not our headquarters.”
He picks up his glass of alcohol and lightly twirls it around in his hand. “I also trust that you’re aware of what a distinguished group such as ours entails? Naturally, we need to have somewhere safe where we can conduct all our activities under the radar.”
“As you can imagine, it’s not just us five. We have many, many members who share the same principles, and this club can’t possibly be large enough to host all of us.”
“Where are you going with this?” Bakugou demands.
“What I’m saying is that we have a separate place as our headquarters, a place much bigger than this. And—” he cocks his head toward Kouki, “—we get there via teleportation.”
“Obviously,” sneers Bakugou, “Otherwise that’d be a huge waste of the old man’s quirk, wouldn’t it?”
“Yes, but that’s only one of the reasons. You see, it’s also so that you won’t know where it is located,” Masaki pauses once again, which you decide in a split second is warranted because of what he’s going to say next.
“And for that to work, we’re also going to have to lock you inside.”
Your breath hitches. Bakugou bristles.
“The fu—”
“We’re going to have to make you stay with us—” the plain-looking man interjects with a slightly louder voice, “—at least until the day of the attack, as we cannot risk you two being seen constantly going in and out of this club every night.”
You’re about to contribute to the conversation for the very first time but Bakugou beats you to it. “Fucking stay in? Isn’t that gonna cause even more suspicion?”
“It wouldn’t if you both come up with a good excuse to disappear,” Kouki retorts with a smidge of attitude. He eyes Bakugou with a raised brow, “Wouldn’t now be a great time to have a top-secret ‘mission’ overseas? And I’m sure your friend here can whip something up.”
You brush off the annoyance that shoots through you at the dismissive mention. Instead, you finally bring yourself to speak up. “I thought you just said we’ll be stuffed in a secret hideout?”
“Ah,” Masaki sounds out, “You are, but this is our gateway, so to speak. You go here to get teleported to the headquarters, and from there, get teleported back here to return to the outside world. We won’t hesitate to teleport away from both places the second we have to, but that doesn’t mean our HQ is easily disposable to us, hence all these measures.”
“All this to say,” he furthers, his timid tone juxtaposing the threatening words you’re sure he’s about to utter, “You two better think twice about betraying us.”
There it is.
He smiles again. “Do either of you have any questions?”
Beside you, Bakugou mutters to himself for a second, before clearing his throat. “You’re yapping on and on about what you’ll do if we betray you and shit. Ain’t that such a warm welcome for your new members?”
—A rhetorical question, because he doesn’t let anyone get a word in. Instead, he presses on.
“But what if we don’t? What’s in it for us?”
“You get to live out your ideals, boy,” comes the old geezer’s snappy reply.
Bakugou snorts, and you’re sure it’s not because he found the guy hilarious.
“That’s a shitty deal on our end, don’t ya think so?” the pro-hero shifts his weight on his other foot. “How ‘bout this, you guarantee protection for my…friend here, and we’re even.”
You hold your breath.
Looking past the way he just so awkwardly referred to you as his friend, that segue just now wasn’t exactly the smoothest.
Still, you have no choice but to roll with it. So, with much conviction, you morph your face into that of shyness—one that you hope is charming enough to win their graces.
“Just her?” asks Masaki, placid as ever.
“I can get by,” comes Bakugou’s confident response.
Once again ignoring the mildly degrading remark, you ready yourself to use your quirk. You closely examine the leader’s features as they transform into an expression of contemplation, even as he turns to the other two and engages them in quiet conversation.
You and Bakugou stand there for a few moments, waiting, before Masaki finally turns again.
And all that preparing to utilize your quirk goes out of the dilapidated windows once you catch a glimpse of his face.
“I guess that’s settled, then.”
Called it.
Masaki then raises an eyebrow at the two of you. “Any more concerns?” he smiles to himself, “Heartwarming requests?”
Neither of you says anything.
“None?” he asks again, before patting his thighs in a gesture of finality. “Well, then, I believe it’s time for you to see your new home! Kouki-san?”
At the mention, the old man slowly gets up from where he made himself very comfortable on the couch, and walks leisurely towards you, planting himself in front of and between you and Bakugou.
“Hang tight,” Kouki smirks, reaching out for both of your hands, and you’re just about registering how eerily cool his are when the ground that was perfectly carpeted and steady just a second ago suddenly collapses from beneath you.
A violent wave of nausea instantly hits you as the room completely vanishes before you, replaced by pitch-black darkness in a second. You scramble for purchase—tightening your grip on the person responsible for whatever the fuck this is—as the noise instantaneously gets sucked in a vacuum, leaving you in full silence. Your legs are jelly as you stumble on your feet, and you’re convinced you’re going to fall to your death down to the abyss below you when—just as fast as the lounge disappeared—a warmly lit hallway materializes in front of you.
But it’s too late, you’re already out of balance and lurching forward—inch by excruciating inch—right until you feel a hand grab your forearm and you’re unceremoniously yanked back into an upright position.
You whip to look at Bakugou as you wobble on your feet, and he’s staring at you with such alarm that makes you feel so…vulnerable. He retracts his left hand a beat later when you eventually steady yourself, his serious and unrelenting gaze fixated on you before shifting to study the place you just got teleported to.
You follow suit, eyeing the hallway as you place the hand Kouki was holding into your pocket to warm it up.
Similar to the club and the room you were just in, the area is barely illuminated, but it’s bright enough for you to make out the dark wooden doors that line both sides. You’re right in the middle of the hallway, and at one of the ends you think are staircases leading both to a lower and an upper level, while at the other end is another door.
If these lead to what you think they lead…
Then, damn.
They weren’t kidding about lodging.
From the corner of your eye, you see the old man look at you and follow your line of vision, shifting to study the aforementioned door at the end of this hallway.
“That’s your room,” he offers curtly, like this job of chaperoning you to your place of residence for who knows how many days is beneath him.
Room, you parrot in your head.
Room singular.
“Well?” he asks, not even bothering to hide his impatience when neither you nor Bakugou makes a move. “Aren’t you going to check it out?”
You hesitate, glancing at Bakugou to find him frowning at Kouki, before turning to look at you.
“We don’t have all day, you two,” Kouki adds on with a sigh at the same time you raise your eyebrows ever so minutely at the pro-hero, as if asking for confirmation. “Go on, I’ll wait here.”
It only takes a small nod from Bakugou to pull you out of the paralysis, and the minute that he does, you’re already moving to the spot beside him, matching his pace as you trudge towards the door.
As inconspicuously as you can, you check the corners of the room along the wall facing you for cameras, only to find none.
And so you do it.
With your backs turned against the Teleportation master, you finally let your emotions show on your face.
You also chance a peek at Bakugou, only to find him already eyeing you with the very same expression you’re sure is written all over your features.
The one that says you’re fucked.
You don’t get to dwell or comment on the shared sentiment, though, mainly because they’ll hear every word you say, but also because you arrive in front of the door. Bakugou looks at the knob and then at you warily, and you can only nod in encouragement.
That seems to be enough of a push for him, because he reaches for and turns the handle, pushing past the entryway so you can walk in from behind him.
Now, the first thing that registers after you startle at the door closing is the fact that the room is small. Tiny, even. There’s another door at the back, which you think leads to the comfort room.
But that’s pretty much it.
That, and there’s only one bed.
To your credit, though, you’re able to refrain from gasping in horror at the sight of it, which you can chalk up to the next thing that you see—a couch.
It doesn’t seem like it’s foldable or can be converted into a larger bunk, but it’ll have to do. It’s brown and hopefully real leather this time, and is crammed right next to the bed. You remind yourself that they were only expecting Bakugou, and so you can’t really complain and that you’ll have to make do with sleeping on the couch for the next n days.
Aside from all those, though, the room is relatively bare.
Well, apart from the cameras with the blinking red light at the upper, four corners of it.
But you don’t get to wordlessly warn him about it, let alone come to terms with the fact that they’re deadass going to be watching your every single move, because something seizes your wrist, spinning you around, leaving you face to face with Bakugou.
You’re too preoccupied with the sudden motion and the fact that you’re just a breadth’s width away from each other to notice the darkened look in his eyes.
Which, in hindsight, you should’ve noticed.
If you wanted any chance at bracing yourself for what he’s going to do next.
“Wha—”
You yelp—cutting yourself off—when Bakugou, the Bakugou Katsuki—Japan’s #2 Pro-hero, Vogue Japan’s Hottest Bachelor of the Year, and the dickhead who used to be your biggest, fattest crush—grabs at your neck and smashes his lips against yours.
You involuntarily jerk away from him, but his free hand shoots up to roughly clutch your hip just as his grip on your neck tightens, pinning you in place and right against him.
And you don’t know how the fuck it happens, but he does something with his tongue, or his mouth? His teeth? You don’t know at this point, and frankly, you don’t want to know, because coupled with his scalding hold on your body, it causes you to do the unthinkable.
You moan.
And again, you don’t even get the opportunity to feel the utter humiliation, because just as quickly as he pounced on you, Bakugou pulls away, but not before scowling at the cameras as if he just noticed them—which you doubt—then taking your hand, dragging you out of the door and into the hallway.
The old man glances at you. “Are you don—”
“Take us the fuck back now,” Bakugou spits as he pulls you right beside him.
At that, Kouki’s eyebrows furrow. “You ought to know better than to speak to an elderly like that.”
But the man who just fucking kissed you apparently can’t give a single flying fuck, because he retorts without missing a beat. “Take us back now.”
That must’ve been the final straw, because Kouki’s face finally morphs into the scowl that you think he’s been trying to suppress this entire time, but to your surprise, he moves closer to the two of you and once again, reaches for your hands.
You don’t know what the fuck is going on, but what you do know is that Bakugou’s onto something here, because he wouldn’t have pulled that stunt just now without any reason, which means the last thing you should do is resist.
And so you take Kouki’s hand, just as Bakugou snags the other, and when you do, the floor gives out from underneath you.
You’re still overcome with a sense of dizziness as your surroundings shift and the noise dissipates around you, but as you find the lounge slowly appearing before your eyes, you find that it’s not as bad the second time.
Bakugou’s still holding your hand when you arrive at the second floor of the club, right back where you stood from a while ago.
Sayaka is the first one to notice you, most likely thanks to her quirk and the goddamn device stuck to your chest, but it’s Masaki who speaks up when he catches wind of your arrival.
He puts down the deck of cards you think he’s just been shuffling before shifting to look at you. “Back so soon?”
Kouki turns around to face him, “Bakugou demanded to—”
“Why the fuck are there cameras in our room?”
Offended, the old man whips around again to glower at Bakugou, seemingly ready to unleash the sermon of the century. “Young man—”
“Turn them the fuck off,” the pro-hero interjects, “And the mics, too.”
Bakugou hesitates, as if unsure of how to properly say the next few words. He glances at you, expression inexplicable, before turning back to face them. “…At least at night.”
Silence.
“Oooh, I see where this is going,” comes Masaki’s reaction a moment later, a knowing smile creeping on his face. You feel yourself flame. “You weren’t being clear with us earlier, Bakugou. You didn’t say you brought your girlfriend.”
“Didn’t think it was necessary to point out,” comes Bakugou’s terse reply.
“Yeah, well, I’m afraid it doesn’t matter either way. The surveillance is for our safety, which comes above everything else, even the privacy of our esteemed members.”
“You promised you’d protect her at all costs,” Bakugou counters. “Protecting her modesty from the perverts you call your surveillance people is part of that.”
Now, you’re not a hundred percent certain, but you’re pretty sure he just shot the cyborg a look at the latter half of the sentence, which you think would’ve been a noble gesture—if it weren’t for the fact that it’s not just her, judging by the sheer number of cameras in this room alone.
Your attention drifts back to Masaki, however, when he heaves a sigh, leaning against the couch with a tired expression on his face. “Tell me, then, Dynamight. How do you propose we make sure you don’t brew something behind our backs off surveillance?”
“I can turn off the bugs,” Sayaka pipes up before Bakugou can answer, her mechanical voice drifting across the room. “They emit a blue light at their circumference that shuts down when I turn the device off.”
“As for the cameras…” she drones on, “The blinking red light should be gone when they’re offline.”
“That shit won’t do,” Bakugou declares decisively, not even letting the suggestion simmer. “There’s no knowing for sure that they’re actually off and aren’t just hacked to seem like they are.”
“The cameras should also face down. And—” he huffs, “—We get to remove the tracker.”
A chorus of protests erupts from the group—particularly from Sayaka and Kouki—but even the twins who are still stationed at the sides. Masaki, in contrast, only sits in silence as he studies the pro-hero, but there’s no missing the uneasiness decorating his features.
“It’s only at night,” Bakugou reasons, voice now a bit louder to be heard amidst the sea of complaints. “You can set up guards around the perimeters of our room. We’ll surrender them at the door before entering, and we can’t go out beyond the doorway until they’re attached again.”
And when no one says anything, Bakugou pushes. “How does that sound?”
You chance a glance at Masaki, who does not seem to be getting anywhere near convinced.
Bakugou must be noticing it, too, because he squeezes your hand so imperceptibly that you almost miss it.
But you don’t, and quite honestly, you could have and be okay with having done so, because you were on it, anyway.
You quickly scan the room.
One, two, three, four, five.
Five.
You can do five.
And so with the most innocent tone you can muster, you speak up.
“That sounds reasonable to me.”
All five whip to look at you, and the second that they do, you pull—swiftly and in succession—eyes jumping from Sayaka to Kouki to Masaki to the male twin and then to the girl.
Your gaze darts back to the leader right after to make sure you got him, but his remarkably serene countenance is enough to tell you that you’ve successfully done it.
You did it.
You just won Bakugou and you the window of time to discuss the mission in the privacy of your own room.
And Bakugou must be seeing the palpable shift in their demeanors because he squeezes your hand once more, only this time you think it’s in gratitude.
You feel a surge of pride swell in your chest.
Let the games begin.
˖⁺‧₊ as always, reblogs, replies, and tags are appreciated <3 feel free to drop an ask, too—i'd love to chat with you. have a nice day
tagging. @bunnysaursushii @yawnzzzzzzzz @cholios @kashee-h @iluv-ace @lotuslovers @elarakive @sugurusmoon @napbatata @k0z3me @h0ngh0ngh0ng @honeyoru @yoongiwithglasses @hellokitty-doll | @junehasnotbeenfound @sugalarity @haechansbbg @sikuthealien @reiniella3 @ita606 @xoxoblueyy @mutsu422 @eyesforbkg @kalulakunundrum @venus-xxoo @lemuhr @pinkpantheris @ashers-playpen @bakugouswh0r3 @certaindreampost @3ve88 @tsumuus @4acoffee @anonymity-222 @lousypotatoes @homeless-clown @sk8wh33l | @matchat3a @harryzcherry @h0nestly-though @cc1306 @gold24fish @bakukags @zennypiee @wannabewolf @kameko-ko @lovra974 @arc6021 @kooromin @surprisemodafakas @ilovedenk-i @st4ntwic3 @j1tterbugaboo @call-memissbrightside @arael-asuka @bakugosgothhoe | @js-favnanadoongi @stxrrielle @panikk-attackkk @lotusstarr @ordola @simpforeveryone @typsichryle @arsonfrogger
#buzzing with excitement!!!#bkg didn't just do THAT#bakugou x reader#bakugou x y/n#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou imagines#mha imagines#bnha imagines#mha scenarios#bnha scenarios#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bakugou x you#bakugou imagine#bakugou fluff#bakugo x reader#bakugo x y/n
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i haven't watched the episode. don't really care to. but apparently eddie is looking at houses in el paso?? and i've always related way too much to buck and the way people in his life leave so much so.
listening to 'please don't go' by abbey glover while writing this is devastating btw. highly recommend to add to the hurt.
tw for suicide attempt.
Buck drops Eddie off at the airport and then just...doesn't go home. He doesn't think as he drives, taking turns and just alert enough to be safe on the road, but honestly? He has no fucking idea how he ends up in the mountains, parking in the small dirt lot at the end of the hiking trail.
Everything feels numb. Static fills his brain and spreads down his neck, all the way to the tips of his fingers.
He turns off the Jeep and takes out the keys. Drops them carelessly into the cup holder.
He should've seen this coming, right? People leave; they always have, and always will. Everyone from his own sister to his ex-girlfriends, and his ex-boyfriend. Now his best friend.
There's just something buried deep into his very being, something built into the coding for Evan Buckley, that makes people leave him. No matter how much he clings and wants to fight for it, they'll walk away from him and his love.
It's him, it has to be.
Buck leaves behind his wallet, his keys, his work bag. Everything is left in the Jeep except for his phone, because no matter how much people leave him with barely a goodbye, it goes against everything that makes Buck, well, Buck to do it himself.
He knows this trail. Tommy and he have been on it before, once or twice after Buck dragged him along with him. They'd stopped at the top, where a small cliff overlooks the beautiful scenery with LA off in the far distance.
He remembers the way Tommy pushed him against a tree and sank to his knees, looking up at Buck with an adorable, bright grin with scrunches up his nose. Buck misses that grin fiercely.
The sun is just beginning to rise as Buck starts his walk. He doesn't go up the mountain with a specific plan in mind, didn't wake up to take Eddie to the airport at four in the morning, and think I'm going to kill myself today, but the higher he gets on the trail, the more he knows.
It's early enough that he has the trail to himself. That's good. It's not, he needs to turn around and go back to the Jeep, go home but his feet keep moving him up, up, up. There's nobody around who will have to see what he's about to do and be traumatized by it.
He's seen more than his share of deaths through work, he knows how badly it can fuck you up. He doesn't want to do that to someone else.
When he gets to the top, Buck stops and just breathes. The air is fresher up here, cleaner. It makes some of the buzzing in his head quiet down. He can feel his fingers again, feel the way his heart pounds from the cardio workout of climbing, and make his hands throb.
He walks to the edge of the cliff and sits down, his feet dangling over the edge. There's a boulder a few feet away from the edge that holds memories of him leaning back against it as Tommy kisses him, holding Buck's hips with hands hot enough to brand him.
His very soul feels branded by Tommy. His chest aches every day, making his stomach sink with a homesick feeling he hasn't had since before he moved to LA. His apartment is still full of the baked goods that he creates every time he has to try to not call or text him.
He doesn't stop himself from calling him today.
Buck almost thinks it's going to go to voicemail before it's picked up at the last second.
"...Go for Kinard?" Tommy answers, clearing his throat. His voice is sleep-rough and deep, and Buck hasn't heard it in so long that it's like applying balm to very shattered, torn edges of a wound. "Hello? Who is–Ev—Buck?"
"Did I ever tell you," Buck starts, and he sounds just as rough, but he's more awake than he ever has been, despite the bone deep tiredness that fills him, "about the fact that I was made to be a savior baby for a brother I never met? My parents made me in a science tube so that they could use my bone marrow to heal my brother, Daniel, but it didn't work. I thought for a little while after I found out that it was because I was defective, but I get it now."
Sheets rustle on the other line before Tommy sits up again. "What are you talking about, Evan? What's wrong?"
Buck continues talking, bowling over Tommy's questions like he didn't hear them. "I think there's something inside of me that's toxic. Toxins drive people away, it makes them sick, it's the only thing I can think of that makes sense for why everybody I love gets sick of me and leaves. It has to be me, right? Nobody stays, not forever. There's something wrong with me and I've finally figured it out."
"No, Evan," Tommy says, voice soft. He can hear the concern, though, the urgency hidden under his tone. There's the sound of jingling keys and a door opening and closing. Tommy's too far away to stop him.
"Sometimes, people leave. It's just what they do, it is nothing about you or what you've done. It's them. Their problems. My problems, that we should–we should sit down and talk about. Evan, where are you? I'm worried."
He almost doesn't want to tell him, but maybe it'd be better for someone to come out and collect his body so he doesn't ruin the trail. Leave it as you found it, or whatever. He gives Tommy his location and ignores the way it starts a mental countdown in the back of his mind. He doesn't have long now.
"It is me, Tommy. I want to believe you, but I can't. Not when hard evidence for almost my entire fucking life says otherwise. My parents emotionally left before I was even born. Maddie. Abby. Other girlfriends. I even lost the 118 at one point–thanks to that stupid mistake with the lawyer. Everybody leaves. And–and now with you, and Eddie. I'm tired, Tommy. I'm so goddamn tired."
Tears drip down Buck's cheeks. It's exhausting, viewing every relationship as a ticking time bomb waiting to go off, waiting for them to exit left out of his life. He thought things might be different with Tommy, it was one of his longest relationships, but he was wrong.
"You know, when you broke up with me that night, you said you'd be my first, but not my last. You were wrong. I-I love you so much, Tommy, even though you broke my heart. I hate you for leaving just like everyone else, but I also love you. You'll always be my first and last now. It's my turn to leave."
"Evan!" Tommy shouts into the phone and Buck cringes. "Evan, please, don't do anything. I'm on my way, okay, baby? Please just sit still and wait for me and we can talk–about everything. Please."
It'd be so easy to lean forward and let gravity do the work to drag him off the edge. The side of the cliff digs into the bottom of his thighs and he kicks his feet, knocking against some of the dirt and watching it tumble down.
His phone starts buzzing insistently in his hand with texts. Tommy must have sent out a message. He doesn't look at any of them as he pulls his phone to set it on Do Not Disturb before putting it to his ear again.
He doesn't know what to do. He wants the hurt to stop, he just wants it all to stop, but he's afraid. What if he's too weak to commit? Just like he's too weak to not let people back into his life, even if he knows they'll just leave again.
Weak and toxic.
He drops his phone onto his lap and hunches down, elbows pressing into his knees as he covers his face. He can hear sirens in the distance getting closer.
A strangled sob rips its way from his throat and he makes his decision.
"Okay. I'll wait for you."
There's an audible sigh of relief from Tommy. "Thank you, Evan. I'll be right there, okay? Keep talking to me, baby."
He doesn't know what to say anymore and tells Tommy as much.
"That's okay, Evan. I-I heard from Howie that you were baking lately? What have you been baking?"
Buck knows what's Tommy's doing. He's stalling so that Buck doesn't kill himself before Tommy and the first responders can get to him. He's done it dozens of times before to people on the edge while he's rescuing them.
"A lot of bread, really. Pumpkin bread, banana bread, butternut squash. I even, uh, have a sourdough starter that I've been feeding for a couple of weeks now. I named it Billy because it looks sometimes just like the, uh, boils I got from the curse when it expands."
Tommy lets out a watery laugh. "Of course, you'd name your sourdough starter." He clears his throat and the sirens are suddenly much louder in Buck's ears before they cut off abruptly. Quiet, rushed talking that Buck doesn't understand before Tommy starts running. "What else?"
"I made baked Alaska pretty soon after we broke up. It took me hours to make, and the entire time it was setting in the freezer, I had to bake other things to stop myself from calling you. I-I don't know if Chim told you that's why I started baking, but it is."
When Tommy responds, it's not through the phone. He comes to a stop beside him. "It sounds like your coping mechanism was more productive than mine, at least. Want to get away from the edge for me, Evan?"
He holds out his hand and Buck takes it with a shaky laugh. "Oh, yeah? What was yours?" The knowledge that Tommy was moping just as bad as Buck makes him feel...something.
"Eating entire pints of ice cream by myself on the couch while watching rom-coms." Tommy pulls Buck to his feet and wraps his arms tight around him. Buck can feel how badly Tommy is shaking. "Thank god you're okay. Thank you so much for calling me, Evan. Fuck."
Buck hugs him back and ignores the paramedics lingering behind him. He knows he's going to be taken away in the ambulance and put under a 72-hour hold because of this. He doesn't think about that, or what it means for his job when he's let out.
He focuses on Tommy and the way he clings to him. He came back. Sure, maybe he'll leave again when the initial scare of everything fades away, but it's more than most people have done in the past.
Tommy pulls away first and holds Buck's face gently in his hands. There are tear tracks on his cheeks and more spill over as he looks Buck over. "I love you too. I didn't say it earlier and didn't say it then, but I am now. I love you so much, Evan Buckley.
It doesn't fix everything, doesn't even scratch the surface, but it raises something dangerous in Buck's chest.
Hope.
#bucktommy#tw suicide attempt#katie.txt#moosh worbs#what is fanfic but therapy through osmosis or some shit#uploading this to ao3...tomorrow or smth#911 spoilers
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Real -Chapter 1
Summary:
While hiding from his parents in Gotham, an ill-timed encounter with his neighbor, Jason, has Danny pretending to be his own twin. Fortunately for Danny, the more he pretends the easier it gets. Until he is not pretending at all. Or: Danny names a duplicate and via ghost logic, said duplicate ends up becoming real.
Next->
Also on AO3
Notes:
This story was written thanks to @jackdaw-sprite who commented on a Tumblr post a wrote asking what I should write next with "I haven't read nearly as many of your works as I'd like to before saying which ones I'd like to see continued, but there's one where Danny names a duplicate, and because of ghost logic, the duplicate becomes real. It feels like such a neat idea to play with!" So here I am writing a whole fic about it! Structurally, this is still very much half-fic outline with some important scenes written out. I'm not planning on expanding it beyond what it is. Still, I hope you enjoy the story. :) A note for readers, those here for the DC content especially: this is very much a Danny heavy fic. The focus will be on Danny and Jamie's relationship as the clone goes from just a duplicate without its own life, to a real person with his own identity. The Bats, Jason especially, will be present, and important for Jamie becoming his own person. But those relationships are definitely secondary to Danny and Jamie's.
After a reveal gone wrong, Danny runs from his parents and the GIW. Soon, he finds himself living in a crummy apartment and trying to keep a low profile. He doesn't have very much, so he is very excited to find an actually in decent shape couch that someone was throwing out. It's late so, figuring no one will see him, Danny duplicates to have two pairs of hands to get the furniture up the stairs and into his apartment.
Of course, Danny does get spotted by his neighbor, Jason, who offers to hold doors open and help with the unwieldy couch. Names are exchanged: Danny and, after a pause as Danny realizes he has to come up with something for his duplicate, Jamie. The "three" manage to get the couch inside. But now Jason is worried about what appears to be a pair of twins, 16 years old at the most, living alone in the apartment with one ratty couch and a bookbag between them. Jason isn't pushy or overly concerned, but he does make a point to check on his new neighbors regularly.
After the second time running into Jason and being asked about "Jaime," Danny realizes he's going to have to pretend to be his own twin. Duplication is very helpful for that, though he tries not to do it too often and for too long; it does use a lot of energy. He'll just have the "twins" make regular, short appearances together. It's not like he's trying to get close to anyone in Gotham
But inevitably, short appearances escalate into having dinner with Jason. The first is a one off; man claimed he made too much and Danny didn't really have money for food. Plus it was really good. Accepting the hospitality just this once wouldn't be that bad. Of course, "Jamie" has come to dinner too.
One dinner leads to more meals with his neighbor, to Jason trying to teach "the twins" to cook more than easy mac.
Jason's youngest brother meets the "twins" when he pounds on the door during dinner and barges in, complaining that "Father is being unreasonable" and had ground him.
Damian and "the twins" end up huddling in Jason's apartment during Danny's first rogue attack since he arrived in Gotham. Jason ran off as soon as the alert went off, claiming that he was needed at the fire station where he worked. He pointedly says that Damian can stay and look after his non-Gothamite neighbors since he's grounded. The preteen is prickly but does stay put. Danny starts to get restless, unable to re-merge and starting to fear that his energy will waver and "Jamie" will pop out of existence. He nervously eyes the door and Damian threatens to stab him if he tries to leave, saying that "Todd is apparently fond of you both and will be quite peeved" with Damian if something happens to Danny and Jamie.
Well.... Jamie will definitely disappear if Damian stabs him. So Danny manages to maintain his duplicate for five hours, more than twice as long as any time before. By the time the threat is over and Danny can go back to his apartment, he is straining, desperately trying to hide how exhausted and shaky he is from the excursion. He loses hold of the duplicate as soon as the door is closed.
Despite the hardship, maintaining a duplicate is somehow so much easier after that. He can stay duplicated for longer and gradually, he realizes controlling the secondary body is becoming easier. At the beginning, he needed a lot of effort and control to pilot the duplicate, having to mentally direct it to speak or move. He played "Jamie" as being shy and quiet, so there was less talking to dictate. But overtime, the need for mental prompting becomes less and less. Playing "Jamie" became more automatic, more instinctual. Almost like the duplicate runs on auto-pilot, mostly acting how Danny himself would, though more reserved. To an outside perspective, it looks like "Jamie" is finally getting comfortable and coming out of his shell. But to Danny, this was a relief, spending less energy running his duplicate and less time worrying about being found out.
Slowly, Danny meets more of Jason's family. One of Jay's brothers, Tim, runs into him at his coffee shop job and, blinking sleepily, asks which twin he is, before realizing that Danny is wearing a name tag. This leads to Danny's coworkers finding out about "Jamie" and his "twin" visiting him at work.
As the act grows and more people end up meeting "the twins," Danny spends more and more time pretending to be a pair of twins in more and more ridiculous situations. Playing both of them gets easier and easier, more and more comfortable until the twins can banter, share inside jokes, and tell stories from their childhood. Maybe it is intentional, maybe it's subconscious. But slowly, differences develop to differentiate the twins. "Jamie" is growing out his hair. He loves toast and watching documentaries about history. Danny, more and more convincingly, pretends to have a brother until at some points... it no longer feels like he is pretending.
Despite his new friends, Danny is still so lonely. The apartment is still almost bare, the money he gets from his job barely enough. It's never the job he wanted; he wants to be in school now, applying to colleges so he can get into NASA. But he can't do anything to draw attention to himself, not with the government breathing down his neck or the danger of the vigilantes running him out for being a “meta”. And he misses his friends and sister so badly.
One particularly hard night, when he is heartbroken and hurting, Danny lies on his second-hand mattress in the dark, weeping. He mourns his parents turning on him, his heart aching for Sam, Tucker, and Jazz. He wishes more than anything that he was not alone right now.
Suddenly, there is a yanking on his core that leaves his gasping. A full body pulling sensation that almost feels like being peeled, except somehow it does not hurt. A second later, it is over and through his blurry eyes, Danny can barely make out a figure kneeling in front of him. Arms coax him into sitting up and pull him into a hug. Danny cries for a long while, not thinking about what just happened, not thinking about what... or who... is holding him. He just accepts the comfort, savors the feeling that he is not alone.
Finally, after the tears slow, Danny pulls back and looks. He lets himself realize what he is looking at. And as he takes in eyes like his, the feeling is something between awe and fear. There is a light in the blue eyes, a spark that he does not recognize.
And as the brow wrinkles in confusion and the mouth slowly works, words spiral out. Words that Danny could never have predicted.
"If we... if you keep doing this..." Each word is slow and deliberate, as if each takes great effort. "This...." One hand motions slowly, vaguely, as if un-used to movement. "Jamie won't be a lie anymore."
Danny is stunned. He stares for a long while, unable to process. He does not understand what the words mean, why the spark in those eyes makes him just as elated as it makes him afraid.
So he takes the duplicate's hand and pulls the ecto-energy back inside himself. He reabsorbs it and "Jamie" disappears. And Danny thinks.
Slowly, he realizes how easy staying duplicated has become, how distant and foggy memories from his duplicate's perspective are. He replays the words in his head. 'If you keep doing this... Jamie won't be a lie anymore.' He wonders if they mean what they suggest, and most startlingly.... he wonders where they had come from, if not from himself.
For a few days, he avoids anyone who has met the twins or claims that his "twin" is busy whenever someone asks. But inevitably, his trusty neighbor Jason notices the avoidance and invites himself over to cook dinner. Reluctantly, Danny duplicates; there is clearly no avoiding this conversation.
The dinner is awkward. Danny has a hard time looking at Jason.... and an even harder time looking at his seeming twin. None of the three say much and by the end, their neighbor huffs a sigh and says his piece.
“Look. I know that no one, especially two teens, live in a shitty apartment in Crime Alley if they can avoid it. I don't know if you got kicked out, ran away from home, are hiding from something. And I don’t care. I won't ask. But I was an alley kid. I lost my mom younger than both of you, ended up on the street. I know what it's like just scraping by, trying to survive all on my own. That's why I look out for the kids here. I want to help you guys, no matter what your story is.”
Danny stammers out a disbelieving thanks. He is touched, really, despite the fear of discovery, of vulnerability quivering in his heart. Jason is a good guy and it feels good to have someone who cares. But... the maybe-not-a-lie sits on the couch beside him. A story he could never hope to explain...
Jason smiles, ruffling both of the twin's hairs. He stands to leave. "Take care," he says, almost afterthought. "You're lucky to have each other."
"Jamie" seems to lean, just the tiniest bit closer to Danny at the words.
Jason leaves and it is just Danny and his duplicate. The half ghost releases a breath, letting some of the tension release. He reaches to reabsorb his double and-
A shaky hand grips his forearm. Danny looks, meeting the blue eyes. The spark is back, just the smallest hint in the posture that something is different. Slowly, the brow wrinkles, becoming something worried.
"What is it?" Danny finds himself saying, as if he expects a real response.
"Have... each other." Again, the words are slow as if just the act of thinking is hard. "Not a lie."
Now Danny's brow is wrinkled. "Not a lie? Are you saying that's true? Or asking if it is?"
"Not a lie." The words repeat. "Jamie not a lie."
Danny's stomach knots. He’s heard his duplicate speak dozens of times, even been surprised by some offered puns. But this…
“Not a lie.” One more repeat, this one faster, surer, almost desperate.
Danny looks up again. “Jamie.” He says the name. He’s spoken to his double before in front of other people, as part of the act. But this… it feels as bizarre as it feels right. “Jamie…. Are you… real?”
For just a second, there is something like hope in the other’s eyes. Then, the brow furrows in great effort. “Yes… No….” One more longer, unsure pause. “Becoming.”
“You’re… becoming real?” The words are breathy. Danny isn’t sure whether they make him feel that same hope, or if he feels sick.
The half ghost looks away, staring down at his lap. He doesn’t know what this is, how this is happening. A moment of panic stabs. Is he sick or insane? Or… is it a trick? A trap?
Danny reaches with his mind, trying to feel. A parasite infecting him? Another ghost, trying to overshadow. There is a connection, a bundle of a dozen fine threads. It is a link to… something not quite separate. Danny feels the almost presence at the end, the not-quite himself he is speaking with. And… It is like cradling a baby bird. Small, fragile, and so young. No malice, just pure innocence.
The half ghost looks up again. His hand shifts, feeling the cold flesh. His fingers press, the almost flutter of a heart beneath the skin.
The awe from that late night rises, a question echoing in his head. What happens if he lets this continue?
He… won’t be alone. Danny remembers that night, crying on his mattress and desperately wanting comfort. And all those times hanging out with Jason. The jokes and banter started as an act to sell the lie. But… weren't they so much more now? Danny had pretended to have a brother and in pretending had imagined one… Now that brother, that twin sat beside him.
But at the same time… fear spiked. What would happen if he didn’t stop this? Could he even stop this if he wanted to? It feels inevitable, unstoppable. Not if he stays living next to Jason. But… if he tells the truth? Or if he runs, starts again somewhere else. He could reabsorb his duplicate now and let this whole thing fade into memory. Jamie would disappear…
A wave of fear surges from outside himself. Danny meets terrified eyes. Something in him softens, crumples.
“Jamie?” Danny asks again and can almost feel the heart-flutter solidifying. “Do you want to be real?”
There is a pause, the fearful face becoming something narrowed eyes and sure. “Yes.” So much determination. Danny feels the one thread of dozens snap.
“Alright then.” Danny heaves a sigh, deciding.
He will hold out as long as he can. He will stay duplicated, keep Jamie here until he’s not a duplicate at all. Jamie will be real.
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Kamala Harris spent a large chunk of the tail end of her campaign trying to appeal to the median republican voter and lost. "dems are a minority" in the sense that the voter difference in the 2024 election amounts to a difference of less than 3%. Trump still got less votes this time around than Biden achieved in 2020. The average voter is not ride or die for any particular candidate or, really, any particular party. The majority of voters are currently registered independent, half of which "lean" republican. This does not mean that they are ideologically, inherently aligned with Trump and crave his policy, or are staunchly anti-abortion and pro-Israel. People vote because there is a psychological expectation to choose A or B, and as Harris constantly told people she "wouldn't be much different from Biden," which, for a lot of people, meant that the economy would not change for the better. US Americans seem more interested in a lower cost of living than anything, and I imagine the allure of Trump, who again, promises "something different" gave them a potential "out" from rising costs. You talk to me about how anyone offering a "simple solution" is a fool or an extremist, but you are also vastly oversimplifying things (both the US election, US democracy as a whole, and Israel).
"But whatever the right or wrong of 1947 was it was 80 years ago." OK. Let's drop the past and look at the present. It makes sense to think that Israeli Jews have a right to live where they are born, sure. Simple, straightforward morality. Do the Palestinian people have that same right? Amnesty International posits that the state of Israel is committing the crime of apartheid against Palestinians living in Israel and in the occupied territories.
Here's another for you.
The Jerusalem-based nonprofit, B'Tselem, outlines how the Israeli government demolishes the houses of Palestinians suspected of committing crimes (or, what is much more common, suspected of being *related* to Palestinians suspected of committing crimes) as a form of "collective punishment," forcing those Palestinians to relocate. If the US government did this to its black and/or Hispanic citizens, how would you feel?
Human Rights Watch put out a report citing several people who have held high ranking positions in the Israel government, who admit to an apartheid state created by Israel and used against the Palestinian people.
The Israeli government segregates Palestinians based on race, blocks aid from going into Gaza, and bombs people indiscriminately.
The first link I share in this reply, from Amnesty International, has this to say on the de jure discrimination against Palestinians in Israel and the Occupied Palestinian Territories:
Israel denies Palestinian citizens their rights to equal nationality and status, while Palestinians in the OPT face severe restrictions on freedom of movement. Israel also restricts Palestinians’ rights to family unification in a profoundly discriminatory manner: for example, Palestinians from the OPT cannot gain residency or citizenship through marriage, which Jewish Israelis can.
So there is clear discrimination against one type of person, but not against another.
We can talk about the war crimes Israel committed during Operation Cast Lead during the 2006 "Gaza War," the war crimes committed by Israel during the invasion of Lebanon, or the war crimes committed by Israel during the Six Day War. Most moral army in the world, folks! Clearly nothing has happened since 1947; the Palestinians, who are all apparently to blame for anything Hamas does, though I doubt you'd think that all Israeli Jews are to blame for the extreme actions of it's government and "Defense" Force," (but hey "it's the only democracy in the middle east, and since majority rules in a democracy according to you, I guess the majority of Israeli Jews love committing genocide! Somehow I doubt this) just need to keep their heads down and believe in peace and order (not complaining while the Israeli government displaces, starves, and murders them.)
Change, or go fuck yourself.
was watching this video the other day and Ilan Pappe makes a pretty good point, where the reason why Israel doesn't have a major left wing (and if it did at one point, it definitely doesn't anymore) is because people can see through the logical fallacy of "progressive settler colonialist genocide" and I feel like the same thing is happening with the Democratic Party in the US, where you can't be the party of social equality and violent imperialism at the same time without becoming a walking contradiction, and this is probably why a lot of leftists get filtered out at the lower levels of the party while the leadership remains staunchly conservative in everything other than slogan
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SKZ Pack Chapter 8
Trigger Warnings: None
2 hours to go and Chan goes to work. 3 hours to go and Y/N will be left with Jeongin, Minho and Felix. Y/N was determined to decorate the living room with Felix. Felix had started slowly pulling the boxes out to hide in his room, while the wolves got ready to go out. Hyunjin was working on Chan's assets while Jisung and Changbin worked out at the gym. Seungmin was out getting more Christmas supplies, even though he threatened Chan would spank her for it because he hates it going up early, but did Y/N care? Nope. She was ready. As soon as Chan gave her one hell of a kiss goodbye, promising he was leaving for three hours, Y/N knew her plan was going to work as soon as Felix knocked on her door. "So we need to somehow get rid of Minho," Felix whispered. "I'll lock him in the kitchen. Do you have the keys to the doors? I'll barricade the alcove." Y/N said. Felix nodded and pulled out the keys while Y/N ran down the stairs. The first one Y/N had to lock was the back door, which Minho didn't notice. Once the second door was locked Minho turned around in confusion as to why Y/N locked the door, but he ignored it and went back to his cleaning until he heard the scrape of a table come past the alcove. "What are you doing little wolf," Minho asked causing Y/N to snort with laughter. She was almost dying on the spot at his confused look. "What's going on?" Minho asked again but Y/N ignored him and dragged the corner table over and placed it between the alcoves. "Locking you in." Y/N giggled.
Minho crossed his arms and stalked closer, watching her like she was his prey. Y/N giggled trying to get him to stay back while Felix dragged the tree into the living room. "Little wolf." Minho sang. "Nuh-uh. Stay right there. All day." Y/N giggled. "If I kiss you will you tell me?" Minho asked boldly. "If I give you lots of kisses and attention and. And. And. And. Help you in the kitchen you will not get mad." Y/N begged as she looked at the wolf. "Hmm." Minho hummed and brought her chin forward, ready to kiss her when he noticed two ball balls run out the door. "What is that?" Minho asked just as Y/N pulled him into a suffocating kiss as she slid her tongue into his mouth. Minho gasped and a hot feeling swelled in his stomach as he grabbed the wall. Y/N brought her hands up into his hair pulling his head back to deepen the kiss. When Minho suddenly pulled back his saffron eyes appeared. Y/N felt nervous when she saw his eyes. Did I do something wrong? "You're such a little distraction are you not omega? Now tell me what you are up to. Hmm." Minho asked slowly. "Putting the Christmas tree up," Y/N said nervously. "Alright. Let's do it. Felix doesn't know how to put it up." Minho stated, pushing the table away so he could get through, while Y/N nervously watched him. She wondered if he was going to tell Felix to stop. Felix jumped, almost knocking the tree down when he saw Minho. "Baby, why is Minho here?" Felix asked nervously. "He said he wanted to help," Y/N said innocently, while Minho gave them a grin.
Minho pushed Felix out of the way to put the tree up, because Minho liked it a certain way. It had to be simple but elegant. While he did the tree, Y/N and Felix decorated the living room with Christmas pillows. Even the fireplace was decorated in garlands with cute little ornaments. Seungmin joined later with bags of snacks and some weird-looking ornaments he got because he was apparently under pressure in the store. Minho scolded him for that and told him to put it somewhere else so Seungmin decorated the hallway. "Shall I cook some of the snacks," Y/N asked as she took the bag into the kitchen. "No. No. I can do it." Minho said as he put the ornaments in Felix's hands. "Ya. I can cook Min. Let me cook." Y/N assured as she pushed him lightly into the room. "Did you not like my cooking on your birthday?" Y/N jested. "Yes-" "So then go and decorate. I got this." Y/N gave him a quick kiss before heading into the kitchen. Y/N looked at the foods Seungmin bought and preheated the oven while she set up some savoury snacks in the kitchen.
Y/N smiled to herself in the kitchen, as she thought back to the first time she met them. She feared them if not hated them back then and now things had changed. She felt safe with them. She loved them. She loved all of them in different ways. She loved Chan's patience and caring nature. She loved Minho's silent attentive nature that isn't always recognised as it's hidden deep within his cold façade. She loved Changbin's sense of humour and playful nature when he didn't want to do something. She loved Hyunjin, and despite him still being a closed book she loved his determination to keep her free from isolation. She loved Jisung's neediness and paranoia to get things right. She loved Felix's naiveness but his hidden strength to protect when he needed to. She loved Seungmins aloofness but also his irrevocable sexual nature. She loved Jeongin's determination to be the best alpha, but most of all she loved his protectiveness. Love was a strange thing for Y/N and she didn't think she could ever love again, but one thing she learned was you can only love once. You can only love someone once in that way. Love forms in different shapes and sizes. There is no way you can love someone different in the same way. People are far too different and hold many flaws. Even Y/N was flawed. She was flawed in many ways but her scars and wounds had started to heal. She was in a new place with new people who loved her. She felt safe.
Y/N jumped when she felt someone wrap their arms around her waist, placing their chin on her shoulder. It was Minho. He didn't say anything at first, only embracing her as he watched her put the snacks in a bowl. "Why do you look sad but feel happy?" Minho asked. "I'm happy. I was only reminiscing and thinking about how things have changed. How I feel safe here. Loved." The last part was a whisper, but Minho heard it. "You are loved, Y/N more than you ever know. I'm glad you feel safe here. You deserve to feel happy." Minho said, his voice softer than usual. "The living room is done. Chan and Hyunjin are on their way but I diverted them as I've asked them to pick up sauce." Felix stated eagerly. "We don't need sauce," Minho stated as he moved to open the cupboard where a variety of different sauces lived. "He doesn't need to know that. I wanted to watch a film with Y/N before they get here, or at least part of it since Chan is going to shout at us." Felix stated. "He won't. I'll defend it." Minho stated as he pulled Y/N towards the nicely decorated living room.
The living room was cosy and the fireplace had been lit. The sofa was nicely decorated even though Seungmin had already sprawled himself out on it with a bowl of crispy peaches. "What?" Seungmin asked. Minho ignored him and smacked his legs off so he and Y/N could sit down. It was quite awkward for Minho as this was the first time he was being openly affectionate. He allowed Y/N to sit in between his legs, cuddled up to him, while his other leg hit the floor. Felix sat next to Y/N as he flicked through Netflix to find a reasonable film while Y/N placed her legs on him, leaving a sulky puppy bunched up in the corner alone. Minho during the film would occasionally stroke Y/N's hair or rub circles on her hand, making it difficult for Y/N to concentrate on the film. Y/N was feeling a warm little bubble spread in the bottom of her stomach as she looked at the three wolves who were close to her. Even Seungmin had his hand resting on her foot so she knew he was there. "Why is there Christmas shit up," Chan called out. "Ask Minho." Seungmin and Y/N called out. "The living room looks nice. I can tell Minho did the tree." Hyunjin said as he poked his head around the wall to see the living room done up. "You did the living room! What did i-" "Ya," Minho shouted. "It's Y/N's first Christmas with us. She's allowed to celebrate early this year and we're going to make it the best Christmas. So take your grumpy self elsewhere." "Hyung calm down," Seungmin stated as he picked up half the food he dropped down himself from Minho's shouts.
Chan sighed but seeing his sweet omega's face looking disappointed at his actions made him feel guilty. It wasn't that Chan hated Christmas, it was that he didn't understand why they had to decorate two weeks before December. It made no sense. "I think it looks nice, but these blankets are awful." Hyunjin frowned in disgust. "You buy them then," Seungmin answered back. "I will. I'll take Y/N shopping soon." Hyunjin glared as he took one of the snacks off the table. "Hyunjin's right. It does look nice. I'm sorry baby." Chan apologised. He could see Minho's reasoning behind wanting to decorate early and he was right, she deserved it. She deserved better memories. "But no more decorating, please baby," Chan begged. "We're doing the kitchen tomorrow," Y/N answered and Felix grinned, causing the alpha to shake his head as he sat on the stool pressing play on the film they were watching.
Taglist for the iconic readers:
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#stray kids#stray kids x reader#stray kids smut#skz#skz x reader#skz smut#abanb#bang chan#bang chan x reader#bang chan smut#lee know#lee know x reader#lee know smut#changbin#changbin x reader#changbin smut#hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin smut#han jisung#han jisung x reader#han jisung smut#lee felix#lee felix x reader#lee felix smut#seungmin#seungmin x reader#seungmin smut#jeongin#jeongin x reader
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I interpreted the "adaptation from the manga" thing to imply that they'll animate the 3 Yuus (like you said) but my partner proposed smth to me that raised my concerns... what if they only animate Yuuka? or like- default to a female Yuu? I could see that bc it would be probably easier for them to have only one protagonist.
don't get me wrong I like Yuuka and I know a lot of TWST fans are women but since the studio involved is apparently known for shojos I'm scared they'll make it seem like the story is romantic/the game is an otome... Which I mean- we do have SOME fanservice stuff but it's definitely not a romance story. That's why I'm scared 😭 if they do go that path... I much rather prefer the disconnection (?) of having 3 different Yuus than the possibility of this...
Also I'm just 🥲 I'm scared ppl will see that and say ahhh So Yuu has always been a woman!! Because as a trans guy, one thing that rlly made me feel valid in a way was seeing that in the game Yuu has no gender at all... I don't go by they/them but I'd much rather be referred as that than to be misgendered. It's a small thing but it's such an important detail for me (the fact that Yuu is gender neutral/can be whatever u want them to be) that it being erased in the anime would make me pretty sad... even more if ppl take the anime as "confirmation" of Yuu's gender, which it wouldn't be regardless if they end up giving us a girl OR guy Yuu- it would just be another Yuu interpretation different from the game.
But yeah, personal stuff aside, I'm more scared by the possibility of them making it seem like it's a romance story 😭 or ppl calling TWST an otome... which I mean... some people already have that misconception, even some fans...
[Referencing this post and this news!]
I definitely think they're probably leaning towards a new Yuu every season; otherwise, there would be a very uneven distribution of screen time for one Yuu over the others, and that leads into the problem of one Yuu being "more" canon than the rest. Yes, it will probably be easier logistically speaking to keep the same Yuu for the entire anime--but I also said the same thing when we only had the Episode of Heartslabyul manga, and look what happened with that. We ended up getting Yuuka and Yuuta following Yuuken, regardless of the logistical inconvenience of it all. I think if the anime intended to have a singular Yuu to follow for the main story, they would have chosen to adapt the light novel (which has Yuuya across multiple volumes) instead of the manga. The conscious decision to adapt the manga (with changing Yuus) says something to me. So really, I don't think we have to worry about one "kind" of Yuu dominating the anime. I took a look at the portfolios of the two studios collaborating for the Twst anime and didn't see a ton of shoujo myself. There was definitely a handful of them, but overall there was a spread of genres. I think Yumeta Company (one of the studios) has Tokyo Mew Mew New under its belt, which is probably one of its better-known works and maybe that's where the "they're known for doing shoujo" allegations are coming from? Don't quote me on that, though. I'm not someone who closely follows anime studios.
I would, however, like to point out that we shouldn't put all our stock into the studios behind the anime. Yes, they are obviously animating the project and thus have an influence on how the final product is. However, there are tons of other people involved (like the script writer) that will dictate how the anime looks and feels. (In fact, the script writer for the Twst anime, Kato Yoichi, is not known for writing shoujo.) I highly doubt all the staff involved at every possible level of production are conspiring to make Twst a genre it's not. (Related: I blame socialization for this, but it's a little sad that most of us by default think one woman + a bunch of men in a cast must be romantic.)
Now, to your main point. I understand the initial fear of people misunderstanding Twst as a dating sim/otome from how it is presented. Really, I do. I also understand the frustration that comes with people claiming Yuu's identity or gender or what have you is "confirmed". But to that, I ask you: so what? And I don't mean that in a "your feelings aren't valid" way (because your feelings are very valid!) I mean in like... Do these misconceptions others have truly impact your own enjoyment? Do the people believing in these falsehoods erase what you know is the truth? I would wager it doesn't. There has been and always will be those who see Twst or interpret Yuu as something they are not. Lots of us (myself included) thought Twst was an otome game when they first heard of its concept. People claimed Yuuken was the definitive Yuu when the first chapter of the manga dropped. That's fandom, especially the larger they get. If we fixate on those sore spots, it will ultimately make us unhappy because there will never be an end to misunderstandings. I would advise that you try and detach from those worries and just focus on having your own fun in the fandom rather than worrying about how others are consuming or reacting to Twst. Yes, we want Twst, a franchise we've seriously been invested in and love, to be seen a certain way--but I don't think that should come at the cost of your enjoyment. Fandom is meant to be fun, and we don't want to make ourselves miserable by stressing over the "what ifs", you know? Please focus on yourself!!
#disney twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twst#twst anime#twisted wonderland anime#notes from the writing raven#advice#twst manga#twisted wonderland manga#twst light novel#twisted wonderland light novel#Yuuken Enma#Enma Yuuken#Hirasaka Yuuka#Yuuka Hirasaka#Yuuta Mito#Mito Yuuta#Kuroki Yuuya#Yuuyra Kuroki#Yuu
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I have fallen again. I HAVE FUCKING FALLEN AGAIN. I recently learned that I have (mildly?) hypermobile joints, which apparently comes standard with the autism package, and this is why my ankles betray me all the time. I was walking down two short steps on the deck, just two, and my ankle rolled and basically ceased to ankle. I fall so fucking often that I immediately grabbed whatever railing I could reach and managed to sit straight down rather than tumble. Like, I have training for this, at this point. Unfortunately, I did have to put a lot of weight on that guilty foot while I stabilized myself, and now it’s angry with me, like it has any right after what it did. So I’m limping a bit, and my back doesn’t feel great, but I do have a whole repertoire of physical therapy exercises now.
I really, really want the spinal clinic to x-ray me again and see if the herniated disc has resorbed at all. I’m basically down to maybe a Tylenol/Advil combo once a day for aches, no prescription painkillers or muscle relaxers. I’m getting my second pain block (read: slow-release epidural that lasts three months) in a couple weeks, and I really don’t think I’ll need a third one. Assuming my ankles get back in the game, damn.
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