#anyways let me know how accurate I was
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A (somewhat) genuine “What your favourite hermit says about you” chart because my joke one was so popular
Obvious disclaimer: do not take too seriously! these aren’t necessarily true! this is like 50% a joke! i mean everything here positively!
i am still right though. anyways let me know who you are I’m a zed fan
#some of these were hard because I haven’t encountered too many blogs that were HUGELY dedicated to a hermit#like cub was easy. there are a billion convex accounts. they all have the same vibes.#on the other hand. very few gem stress jevin hypno etc#like there were some I could find but only one or two per. so I went off their youtube fandom and general vibes#also some of these are more specific than others. sorry about that. same reasons as specified I just may not have encountered fans of them#much. or the things I could think of were kind of unsuitable for this#anyways let me know how accurate I was#locus fandom time#hermitcraft#mcyt#hermitblr#hermitcraft memes#shitpost
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One thing I like about Apollo in Hades 2 is that he is usually polite, especially respectful towards his elders, but if they provoke him he will get back at them. But in a subtle manner, and only after a few seconds will you realise that he was throwing shade.
I'm paraphrasing here but here are two examples:
Hera: you are just like Zeus (derogatory)
Apollo: did you just compare me to your husband ? How awfully kind of you :)
Poseidon: haha Apollo has finally decided to join the war because he couldn't withstand the pressure from his dear mortals anymore
Apollo: it's because I want to help you, uncle! since I know that you guys cannot handle this situation on your own :)
#there's one between Demeter and Apollo#where Demeter says “oh the reason mortals are so ignoble is because they aspire to be like Apollo”#and Apollo is like “WHOA lady!! what did *I* do?! lets just focus on our dire situation instead of insulting each other yeah?”#i hate that they've turned Demeter into a cynical hateful grandma :/#but if i was in Apollo's place Demeter would have heard some colorful words from me#but anyway i like that they have made Apollo be respectful towards other Olympians#i think that is pretty accurate#I'm actually dying to know more about how they're gonna represent Apollo - Artemis and Apollo - Hermes#hades 2#mine
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@sasheneskywalker i love when you enable me to ramble about things because oh my god do i have thoughts.
so recently, i made a post discussing the phenomena of DC x DP and DC x MLB crossovers and why they exist and part of that post was discussing how largely speaking, at least half, if not more of the Batfamily fandom doesn't read the comics. if they interact with canon DC material, it's adaptations that are their own sequestered universes and oftentimes not remotely comic accurate or seeking to be. the most obvious example is the Young Justice cartoon. i'm adding a cut to this post because it just got so long i'm so sorry.
a lot of times, when people are discussing the "why" of this oversaturation of fanon-only fandom, they blame Wayne Family Adventures. and i think, to a point, i agree WFA is responsible for a boom in this fandom. but as someone who's been in the fandom long before we had WFA, to me it's the other way around. WFA was DC's way of meeting the demand for this easy-to-get-into, easy-to-consume content about the Batfamily that predicates itself on the comics just enough to be vaguely the same characters, but has a more sitcom, slice-of-life sort of vibe so DC could profit off of this section of the fanbase that otherwise wasn't consuming its primary material. and well, it's definitely worked. not only that, but i have a weird theory that the decline in the MCU also led to the rise in the Batfamily fandom. when you consider the fan content that made the MCU popular within fandom, it's that 2012 "they all live in Avengers Tower and Thor is eating poptarts and Clint is in the vents and there are movie nights every Friday" sort of vibe. those were the fics that were a hallmark of the fandom. and as the MCU has strayed from well... quality content in general, but specifically well-thought-out crossover content where characters can have their own arcs but also exist in a wider story where they clearly care about each other, that fandom was sort of homeless. so where do you go, if you like a superhero found family where you can have villains for angst but also stick them all in one big family-like home for silly crack and have a plethora of options for gay ships? well. you go to the Batfamily. if you write a crack/fluff Batfamily genfic with silly vibes and low stakes instead of say, a fic about a very specific comic issue even if it's a popular comic, you're *going* to get more traction for the former. because the fanbase largely just isn't reading the comics.
and i feel... complicated about this. because on one hand, Don't Like Don't Read has been a tenet of my fandom experience. i'm very pro-fandom and that includes fandom content i don't like. and to an extent, i do think this sort of should apply to Batfamily fanon. i enjoy having my moments with other comic purists, giggling over exceptionally painful OOC headcanons or even facepalming in pain over some content but it is on me to not interact with that content. you don't make fandom a better place by being hostile to fans who engage with canon in ways you don't approve of. and frankly? we as comic readers are not going to get non-comic fans to read the comics by being asshats to them. no one is going to want to pick up any comic if we get a superiority complex about it. and also, i feel like we're all lying to ourselves a little bit insisting comics are so, so easy to get into. they're not. we can just all agree, they're really not. i've been single-handedly helping my sister get into comics, specifically Wonder Woman and no matter how simple i make it, i watch her get frustrated trying to understand what pre-Crisis and post-Crisis and New-52 and Flashpoint and all these things mean and what a retcon vs a reboot is and what a Crisis Event is and what the hell Diana's current backstory even *is*. sure, you can give someone a beginner list of comics to start with and slowly dip their toes in the water but sooner or later, *something* is going to confuse them. comics as a medium straight up aren't going to be everyone's cup of tea. and if someone *just* wants to read silly fluffy fanfiction about the Batfamily, i can't entirely begrudge them for not wanting to take the hours and hours out of their day to understand this medium. it's not an accessible medium to get into. "read this and this, but this run is out of print and this run wasn't collected in trades at all but also make sure you read that event in order and this is a good comic but the backstory in it is retconned and you *have* to read this it's so important but it's also really bad because the author kind of sucks" sounds. ridiculous for someone who like. just wants to read some stuff about Nightwing. sometimes, we all make reading comics sort of sound like a chore, not a hobby.
so my point is, i do extend some grace to Batfamily fanon for existing. i think my biggest gripe is, as i said in my other post, misuse of tags (if you're not creating content about comics, maybe you don't need the comics fandom tag on Ao3, just the all media types umbrella tag) and my far bigger gripe: when panels are taken out of context to support fanon only headcanons. if i could impart *anything* onto the Batfamily fandom as a comic fan it'd be this: if you haven't *read* the comic, don't spread the panel. if you don't even know what comic it's *from*, don't spread the panel. it's fine to use comic panels to discuss your headcanons, but so often i see someone spreading a comic panel from a comic they haven't read, and when asked where it's from, they can't source it. a silly example that comes to mind is a post going around, taking a panel where Dick, in his internal monologue goes "here comes the sun. do do do do." and the post is claiming it's from him getting buried alive. when that panel comes from Nightwing (1996) #140, and he gets buried alive in Nightwing (1996) #127, two completely different moments frankensteined together. if you're going to not read the comics, that's completely fine, but unless you're sure of the source and the context, panels shouldn't be spread around. i'm sick of this specifically happening to Red Robin (2009), with ppl claiming Tim has totally killed people because he blew up some of Ra's' bases, when those panels within context, make it clear he gave everyone time to escape. and in a later arc in that very comic, Tim grapples with the idea of murdering Captain Boomerang, and *specifically chooses not to*, because he doesn't agree with murder, even against the person who has hurt him the most. if you'd like to write fanfiction where Tim is pro-murder and has done some sketch things, i'm totally on board and would probably like to read it. but there's no need to pretend it's canon from a few panels you saw out of context.
beyond that, i think it's not *entirely* correct to say that fanon is harmless. whenever i see very WFA-positive posts, they often default to the argument that WFA is fun and silly, and comic fans are killjoys for not liking it. which. i think is complicated because the issue is, WFA and fanon don't exist in a vacuum. if you like WFA power to you, i don't think it's the worst thing ever, but i do think it's degrading to these characters because honestly? they feel incompetent in the webtoon. it's one thing if WFA was solely a slice-of-life sort of deal, just having silly episodes where Bruce is taking on a PTA mom or they're all fighting for the last cookie. but when WFA attempts to take on more serious plots with these characters, it *fundamentally* falls flat in understanding them. i get it, Bruce comforting Jason having a panic attack because a noise reminded him of the crowbar felt cute in a microcosm, but i'm so serious when i say that storyline destroyed how like. half of this fandom understands Jason Todd's relationship to his trauma. it doesn't understand how he reacts when he's triggered, what coping mechanisms he seeks out, and how he would handle Bruce comforting him. even if i can believe for a brief moment Jason *would* be triggered by something like that, him running and trying to hide and then getting a hug from Bruce to make it okay is just. painful. WFA needs everything to be wrapped up in a nice, neat little bow. so even when it starts to tackle interesting concepts, it makes them fall flat with its need to be soft, low stakes, hurt/comfort. there was a two-parter episode that dealt with the complicated mutual hatred/jealousy between Tim and Damian that *almost* really interested me because for once, it felt like the webtoon wanted to explore canon messy dynamics. but of course, it had to be fixed with one conversation and a hug. you don't mend the *years* of issues these characters have like that. WFA isn't in character because these characters are hyperbole cartoonified versions of themselves to fit within the medium and be a cute happy family.
because that right there, is the crux of it. the Batfamily fanon seeks to simplify the Batfamily and force them into a nuclear family. there are so many fantastic posts on here discussing how the nuclear family-ification of the Batfam is eroding decades worth of complex histories so i won't go too far into that. but what i will say is that there's this need, in the Batfamily fandom, for the Batfamily to exist as a unit. they are a *family*. (honestly i think calling it the Batfamily is a misnomer and has been for years but we're in too deep now.) they exist to each other first, and any teams or friends they have come secondary to this family unit. you can *specifically* see this demonstrated in what headcanons are becoming popular these days. i have an entire lengthy meta in my drafts about how i *loathe* the "the Batfamily meets the Justice League" genre of fanfic because it makes no *sense*. in order to have this genre of fic exist, you must operate under the assumption that no one in the League, or adjacent to the League, knows the Batfamily exists and are thus utterly shocked to discover Batman has kids. and to make *that* work, you have to strip *every single Batfamily member* of such important dynamics and friendships so you can lock them all in Gotham for their whole lives. Dick can't have the Titans, Tim can't have Young Justice, Duke & Cass can't have the Outsiders, Jason can't have the Outlaws, Damian can't have the Supersons, Babs can't have the Birds of Prey, and so on. because if they had these relationships, they would be known to the League. the Batfamily fandom doesn't care about this, it's just "silly fanfiction", it's not trying to be serious. but how can you say you like Dick Grayson as a character if you don't understand the Titans *are* his family? at some points of his life, moreso than the Batfamily even is. it is constantly repeated to us in most comics with Dick how much the Titans mean to him. he *needs* them to be who he is. the same extends to every other Batfamily member, most of which have been full League members at this point. but in fanon, that doesn't matter. the Batfamily are a sequestered unit first, and all of those side relationships are secondary and easy to toss away, if it makes your fanfic work better.
and because they have to be a unit first, you have these forced relationships that dump years of actual canon material for the sake of making them get along. the Batfamily fandom has its favorites and well. it's no secret it's usually the boys. Jason and Tim by *far* stand out as fandom faves so, their dynamic is a heavily explored one. it does matter that in canon they don't tend to get along and especially don't see each other as family. what matters is that you can push dynamics onto them. and so fanon gets all twisted up about which Robin Tim actually idolized as a kid (Dick) and what member of the Batfamily is pro-murder but still an older sibling figure to him and looks out for him (Helena, or if you want the dynamic of once tried to harm Tim but they've reconciled, Jean-Paul) in favor of who's the most popular. Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian are always going to be the standouts for popularity, but it's specifically Jason and Tim who are getting fanonized the most. and that's because really, we don't have much canon content of Tim that *isn't* the comics. for Dick you've got Young Justice (tv), for Damian you've got the DCAMU, for Jason you've sort of got the Under The Red Hood movie, but Tim sort of lingers in this limbo. (yes, he's in Young Justce (tv) and Titans (live action) but in neither is he the main character nor given much depth) so, he gets a *lot* projected onto him and has become fanonized. and even with Jason's animated movies, you don't see him interact with Tim, so people build it from the ground up how they want to see it, disregarding of canon comics. i think it's what makes him so popular in the first place- he's malleable into whatever you want or need him to be.
and of course, the fanon ignores other characters in the Batfamily it doesn't know about. i feel like you could create a tier list of Batfamily characters by their popularity, going from the fandom main characters: Tim, Jason, Bruce, Alfred, Dick, Damian. to the underrated: Steph, Duke, Babs, Cass. to the forgotten about unless they're convenient for a story: Kate, the Foxes, Helena Wayne, Carrie, Selina, Harper Row, Maps, Minhkhoa Khan. to the absolutely unknown: Helena Bertinelli, Jean-Paul Valley, Onyx Adams, the Clovers, Julia Pennyworth. it's not lost on me that the ignored characters tend to be women and people of color. which is both a canon and fanon problem, DC will continue adding interesting characters to the Batfamily, play with them for a few years, then drop them to default to the "Batboys" again. and it's a vicious cycle of the fandom only caring about the "Batboys", and thus people entering the fandom via fanon osmosis won't have content about the other characters, therefore, they won't be interested in those characters enough to create it, and it's just this ouroboros consuming itself, no matter how much canon content we have of these other characters. and it's ridiculous just how large the Batfamily is becoming because of this, which is why i'm a pre-Flashpoint fan, because then the Batfamily was contained enough to actually feel like a family with every character having nuances relationships with each other, but i digress because those thoughts could be their own post.
and the thing about fanon is it doesn't exist in a vacuum. DC has started turning the comics to accommodate for what fans are asking for, because fans will beg and beg for content they're not going to consume. Tim Drake: Robin had Tim as a coffee drinker because that's the fanon accepted headcanon. and the resolution of the recent Gotham War arc was for Bruce to buy this new manor for everyone to move in and call him. nevermind that most of these characters have their own homes and have zero reason to be moving in with Bruce. Tim had his marina in Tim Drake: Robin, Dick has Bludhaven, Cass and Steph have their little side of town in Batgirls (2022), and so on. these characters are being forced together as a unit, as one big happy family living together, to appease what non-comic fans want and it's damaging comic relationships. Robin: Knight Terrors saw Jason and Tim team up and working together, which i've seen varying opinions on but i personally despised. their interactions made zero sense for any of their canon history, but it appeases them being this close sibling relationship that fanon acts like they are. also the fears they faced in their respective knight terrors didn't make sense for either character and *only* worked as a moment of bringing them together so they could reassure each other and have this weird dreamscape bonding moment. the canon is bending itself to the will of fanon rather than building on the pre-existing complex relationships. Tim barely even gets along with his most important team in Dark Crisis: Young Justice because it seems the only important relationships the Batfamily can have is with each other. and when we do see them outside of the Batfamily, it only seems to be to relive the glory days like with World's Finest: Teen Titans, instead of developing them as they currently exist. this isn't recent in the comics, it feels like you can trace it back to the New-52, but it does feel a *lot* worse over the recent years. WFA is fine when it exists in its own bubble, but the simple truth is, DC content never exists on its own. the adaptations will reflect back onto the comics. (the damage the Young Justice cartoon has done to some characters should honestly be studied) and so it does frustrate me a bit when fanon-only or adaptation-only fans act like we're being nothing but killjoys for being frustrated with this. since they don't read the comics, they don't see how the comics are suffering as a result of this.
people argue about what's out of character for the comics they don't even read. i'm sorry, but "bad dad Bruce" is consistently canon. that man is just kind of shitty. when you take someone who has the drive he has, who has this need for the Mission first, who needs a teenager in spandex next to him to keep him off the ledge, that guy is sort of going to be a shitty father figure. he just is. not on purpose or with malice, but when you compare him to any other dad in a big DC family, he sure takes the cake. it's why characters like Oliver Queen tend to *really* fucking hate Bruce for how he treats his kids. Bruce loves fiercely, but he doesn't do well with putting that love first. and his love is a controlling one, he is very particular about controlling how others in the Batfamily are "allowed" to operate. it's what drives the wedge between him and Dick, it's why Steph is never a true daughter to him. (besides the reason of her needing to be a love interest to Tim first, anyway-) i've never understood the massive outcry of people reacting to Bruce kinda being shitty in comics they're not reading. there are some moments that get ridiculously OOC with how cartoonishly evil he is (the whole Gotham War arc and that... complicated mess with Jason) but largely if you want sitcom loving nuclear father Bruce, you have to accept that is a fanon thing, not a canon one. the Batfamily being a nuclear family in *general* is fanon. most of the "Batkids" don't actually see Bruce in a particularly fatherly light and begging for moments where he calls them his kids or they call him dad outside of incredibly specific circumstances is just OOC.
it's getting harder and harder to exist peacefully in this fandom it feels like, if you don't comply to the standard fanon has set. i'm happy people are having fun with their blorbos, even if in ways i dislike, but that "harmless fandom fun" does ripple it's way back to canon, eventually. so i end up pretty tangled with my feelings because are fans at fault for DC making these poor decisions? probably not, but it certainly feels like an unfortunate cause-and-effect situation whether at the end of the day, nobody is happy. and of course, i know some fanon-only fans are striving to be more canon accurate and care about canon dynamics more than others, but for them it's always going to be an uphill battle with the above-mentioned out-of-context panels thrown around and ever-pervasive fanon overtaking anything that's truly seeking to be canon compliant. so really, it sometimes feels like we're all losing.
#necrotic festerings#batfamily#batfamily meta#dc comics#fandom meta#fan studies#fanon vs canon#i deleted paragraphs of this to try to make it shorter. it failed btw.#anyway i got into comics when i was like 12 with the dark knight returns#and if i hadn't been into this medium for a decade i don't think i would be able to get into it as an adult so i get it#bc i'm trying to get into marvel comics and fuck ME am i confused as fuck.#do marvel comics have like. an equivalent to crisis events?#is the ultimates like their version of the new-52? i do NOT know#it's so hard and daunting so trust me i get it#if you never wanna pick up a comic god i respect you you're so right this is fucking miserable#i want to live and let live in fandom but *god* i'm struggling here#i used to bend to the will of fanon fun fact#i wrote my share of tim and jason fics playing into fanon tropes. god i hate them *now* but they did fucking numbers.#and i used to care more about getting attention in fandom than being accurate#i've matured now. it's why i write on anonymous so much to remind myself this should be for me.#anyway i could do a character study on every batfam member as fanon vs canon#ESPECIALLY tim and jason. i know so much about them trust me.#jason todd fans annoyed me so much i once sat and read almost every fucking jason comic. i didn't even like him.#but i tell you what i know that man and he will never leave my top five characters on league of comics.#this is so long. is anyone going to read all of this.#if you do you're a fucking trooper i'm saluting you.#this isn't even all of my thoughts i had to condense myself.#bc i also have thoughts about how this means some characters no longer get to exist outside of the batfam#because they only exist as a member of the unit#ergo we have very little current content of helena bertinelli or onyx adams or duke thomas
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THE FEAST IS COMPLETE 🎉🍖🍇🍞🥕🎉
this is an augmented reality I Spy game created in Figmin XR! the hidden items are all suggestions made by you guys :)))
you can play this on your phone by joining the mobile beta via our Discord server 👀👀👀 here's the download link for the Feast scene- have fun!!!! 😁😁
#art#3d art#digital art#ar#augmented reality#vr#vr art#virtual reality#figmin xr#video#food art#this took.......... so long.........#SO long#i tried to stick to thematically accurate medieval foods#and there are exactly one billion gazillion little items#it was incredibly fun to work on though. and has made me VERY hungry#anyways if you get this working on your phone PLS let me know#i'd love to hear about how it goes!
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finally made one of these again! :)
this was so funny to make, i missed doing these. i had so many thoughts so i'll put them in the tags as usual hehe
bonus :3
#i imagine nne and tano probably made up chess. when they were bored in their cave one time#maybe not CHESS but some sort of game#whatever it is. it accurately portrays their dysfunctional family when they all played it HFDGH#idk i usually play board games with family so this automatically makes me think of them a Dysfunctional Family#ANYWAYS#top 4 are self explanatory BUT if there was a throw the chess board option kenge would be that#or a cheat option. shupavu would be that#i decided to let nduli goigoi and dogo win! as a treat :)#good for them!#meanwhile janja chungu and tamka don't know what the fuck is going on#reirei kiburi and mzingo are smart enough to win but don't#njano nne and tano are self explanatory lmao#of course CHEEZi has to ask that#get it#lmao#anyway i laughed making this because their pictures look like how they'd react 😭#the lion guard#tlg#tlg outlanders#tlg outlanders memes#god i really did miss making these
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random but i'm so curious as to know how your eyes look, the way you described them in the past have me intrigued
weird girl eyeball compilation
#ignore my crusty lashes & swollen eyelids beauty was never my strong point - neither is my personality#y my eyeballs look so smol when on their own tf#HOW THEY LOOK SO oval here and so circle IRL#I swear over the years they went from bright blue to green to grey to now whatever all these are I just cbf lookin for older pics#now I guess they just look like a swamp and look differently depending on my surroundings#BC some of these looked SO DIFF when u could see the clothes I was wearing in the pic#like maybe our minds construct colour based on our surroundings idk bro#so Ive come to the conclusion they r basically grey and reflect whatever it is in the room like my soul#ofc even my eyeballs are pro at masking I should have known#turns out I’m not unique just weird#also these r mostly all in bad lighting so I’ll let u know if I ever enter the great outdoors#bc I’m being told they look so diff to all these when outside#I guess they reflect the sky more IDK bruh they r actually blue outside as not demonstrated here rip#I’ll keep u posted if I ever discontinue bedrotting#also these r shitty old iPhone quality lMAO#btw u can tell which of these r the most recent bc the light inside of my eyeballs died#actually it died long before any of these pics but even more so now#also rn the white part of my eyes r red so this is not an accurate portrayal of current day is it LMAO#Anyway these pics r making me want to apply mascara correctly but I cbf
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Sunday Six???
hi gang i've been actually swamped. Who knew being a narrative lead would be so stressful? But I found the time while things were trying to boot on my computer to dig through the WIPs and find the one thing that was poking my brain. Yes, Shinumi is back. Hope you're not sick of him bc he is my son.
So, tagging @four-white-trees @jichanxo @passthroughtime @mike----wazowski @phantasy14 @skysquid22 @ikainkspills
and probably should also tag @bordemsgardem bc... hey guess what! Someone you'd wanna see is here.
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“So where are you from?” Shinumi says, the last word making his voice crack. He winces, but the bartender seems unfazed.
“Yokohama. What about you?” She picks up another glass to dry as she turns to face him.
Shinumi wrestles with the question for a second. “Nagoya. You know, I think I went on a trip to Yokohama at some point.”
“Really? Where did you go?”
“My school did a field trip to… Seriyo High, I think? Either way, it was some highschool there for some sort of dance thing.” Shinumi didn’t realize what he had said until he saw the bartender’s widened eyes.
“Dance? Like, as a competition?” She cocked her head with curiosity. Shinumi blushed with embarrassment. “...It was a long time ago.”
“You definitely have the body for it, but you didn’t answer my question.” she throws a wink at him.
Shinumi takes a deep breath, attempting to ignore the past welling up within him, “Sometimes it was for competition, sometimes it was more like… a performance. I was a fan of the latter.”
#sunday six#well. there goes that being a secret lmao. surprise!#shinumi my boy shinumi#i am unsure of the other tag for the other character. gobl you can let me know I guess#BUT ANYWAY!#I hope i'm writing her right...#i took notes from the beeg document but it might not be accurate and just. ack.#this is like... 2008?#a lot of new things with this WIP#a lot of research into T and how that affects the body#it's been neat. all of the time i've able to work on it (which is. not much.)#but I'll definitely be poking at it when I can
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have to work on a project today and an unrelated thing happened that just made me so so so so so mad (just some irl personal stuff), which normally derails my entire day because i find it so hard to come out of the angry/upset state and tend to just circle back and obsess over whatever triggered it but! today after 20 minutes of that i had a council meeting about it (<- what i call my decision making process) the outcome of which was putting it aside (!!!) for later when i could actually talk about it and resolve it (!!!) & in the meantime we could just do other stuff.
local man exuberant and jubilated to achieve feats of basic emotional self-regulation and was seen excitedly telling reporters he "never thought this day would come" and began giving a thank you speech to nobody in particular. more on this story as it develops
#good idea generator#more and more i find the most effective way to get things done is to have like. a council discussion in my head about it#my thoughts always feel really noisy especially when im upset & its easier to process what im thinking/feeling#if i imagine it as coming from many different sources with different opinions. rather than contradictory ones from me#bc then i get stressed about the contradictions. council discussion is easy bc you can let everyone say their whole perspective#so everyone gets listened to + then theres space to ask questions like 'is this helping or hurting?'#if you're wondering who 'we/everyone' is. its me. this is probably obvious but i never know what is typical when explaining how i think#or if im explaining it in a way that makes sense and is accurate to whats actually going on up there#arguably i dont think any language is ever truly 'accurate' to whats going on up there#feels like trying to see if other people see the same red as you do. what do you ask? and when you think you know how do you check?#anyway. i like the council because i used to just try to shut down negative or spirally thoughts#and it never worked ever it just made me feel more out of control. whereas now i have to listen to the whole thing#+ try to identify what the underlying fear or need is and try to address THAT#also awhile back i read the handbook for internal family systems therapy which has def influenced how i think of myself#now i have never actually done ifs or spoken to a practising professional so grain of salt and whatever#but i have found it is by far the way that makes the most sense for me personally to think abt myself and try to solve problems internally
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Lines in my own fic I still think are funny:
"You call me Drake because you're a transphobic little shit!"
"I do not!" Damian says, appalled despite himself.
#batfam#fic ideas i probably won't write#tim and damian are brothers your honour but they don't get along!!!! it's hard!!!#damian is quite accurately a little shit that does not know how to communicate with literal sacrasm + Perfect Socialite tim!!!!#tim does not know how to be nice to tiny cult-raised assassin who tried to kill him because tim holds grudges like a MOTHERFUCKER#anyway this is a. tim is trans but hasn't picked a name yet <- writing the whole fic without referring to him as tim is HELL but it's also#dami's pov with makes it easier#+ league of assassins: bro your gender does not define how well you do Murder wtf#tim: your grandpa.....is not transphobic?#damian: he is however still a murderous cult-leader who enjoys brainwashing and cultural genocide. let's not provide too many points for+#one singular act of decency#in context of this fic tho. tim: you're transphobic!#dami: shocked pikachu.jpg#but also. tim: you call me drake because you're transphobic!#damian: i call you drake cause you SUCK
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Sorry everyone i finally found a color-accurate suit for aoki im going to be so annoying
#snap chats#IM LYINNGGGGG. about being annoying. ok no im not#i dont know what im lying about POINT IS YEEAAAAHHHHHHH#the place i go to was having a sale and i was like LOL. let me visit#i wanted to get new clothes anyway and then i walk in and what the fuck i see. //screams//#i wont get more accurate glasses. unless i see them in the wildBUT FOR NOW UGH. im so sick#i almost wanna post cosplay pics but 1.) my camera’s a gym sock 2.) im bad at selfies 3.) we dont need to see my mug more than usual#‘snap how are you still weird about your face you stream your face regularly’ lmao right 🥰#not everyone watches streams tho… nor does everyone watch the vods.. which are only link accessible#just havin My Face out there in the open…. wo Ah…#anyway if i cosplay aoki during a stream no i dont#ok bye I Should Really Get Food. or start heading home at least stream soon AH
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for the writer ask
💭🚦💛 💌
💭 What inspires you and your writing?
this is a real marketing major-ass answer (from your local marketing major), but i love sharing knowledge and telling stories. writing’s one of those things that’s a bit of a compulsion for me—i’m always writing something. i took a five-year break from fiction writing before i stumbled ass-first into fanfic last year, but even in those years when i was focusing on my career, i was writing guides and trainings and a ton of other stuff—just not anything fun, lol.
writing is also so cathartic. sometimes i set out to tell a specific story, but at other times, a particular emotion gets me in a vice grip and i have to put it to words before it’ll go away. my stories tend to wind up as emotional dumping grounds as a result.
i don’t write things pulled directly from my own life, but there are bits and pieces of myself and things that have happened to me scattered throughout stuff i’ve written, and usually when i’m about 75% of the way through a piece, i’ll realize it’s absolutely related to something i’m currently going through. funny how art works that way, even when you don’t intend for it to.
and occasionally i just have a fire lit under my ass about an issue and i get so hot about it that i gotta compile my thoughts. looking at you, silver snow
🚦 What sort of endings do you prefer to write: ambiguous, bad, happily ever after, etc.?
look, i would love nothing more for them girls (pick whichever girls you please) to have a happy ending where they kiss and are stupid in love for the rest of forever. i love reading those kinds of stories. but in my heart of hearts, i love an ambiguous ending. i like when there are still questions after the story ends. i like thinking about where things could go or how the characters will go on after the events of the story. like, shared space could be read as having a happy ending, but i don’t really think it is. and with the victors; the vestiges, well. you’ll see :0)
come to think of it, i’m not sure i’ve ever written a happily-ever-after, but i don’t think i’ve ever written a 100% bad ending, either. i read too many bury-your-gays stories and watched too many sad european queer coming-of-age films in my youth to ever be happy putting that kinda thing out into the world. i want to write about love with all its ugliness, but not despair or hopelessness. i think what most appeals to me about an ambiguous ending is that lingering feeling of hope. it’s not the same as the kind you get from a happily-ever-after, and something about it speaks to me.
💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?
honestly? how to take criticism. i took a creative writing class in high school where we had to read our work out loud and then receive feedback on it from the other writers in the class, and that did a lot for me. going into that class, i’d already been writing for forever and had won some little local writing contests and such, so i was a wee bit of a pretentious douche. but i’d never gotten real critique before beyond, essentially, spelling and grammar checks. it humbled me lol. it made me grow so much as a writer, and i could see where i needed to improve or where my head was wedged way too far up my own ass for others to follow. it also helped me recognize strengths i didn’t know i had, and that was huge. it’s easy to get into a self-doubt spiral when making creative work, and good, constructive criticism can do so much to help avoid that.
to this day i love critique. i like knowing what worked or didn’t work so that i can continue to improve as a writer and do better next time. did my themes land? did something really work, but another part fall flat? i’d love to know!! i try to treat everything i write as practice for the next thing, and frankly that’s helped take some of the pressure off so i don’t go into total Perfectionist Mode.
i know critique is kind of a sensitive topic in fan spaces, but i think that’s because a lot of people have gotten unsolicited criticism that is purely critical and isn’t constructive. but getting good, constructive criticism will do so much to help a person grow as a writer. it’s scary, and sometimes it hurts! writing is very personal for most people, and it stings when things aren’t received the way you think they will be. but i know i’ve grown more from having my failures pointed out (and, very importantly, having the good things about those efforts acknowledged) than anything else.
💌 Is there a favorite trope you like to write?
actually Just answered this in another ask!
#sterge.eml#foxyjeongin#thank you for playing my little game and letting me talk about stories (and about me lmao)#sorry this is kind of a long post#i talk too much#i think i sound pretentious in this ask whoops. sorry#unfortunately i kind of am. i’m working on it.#… i guess the short answer to that first question is ‘emotions and mental illness’ lol#if you follow me on twitter (not recommended as it’s just me complaining about the weather and not being able to ride my motorcycle)#you know that every time i bring up my writing in therapy my therapist rocks my shit by revealing the story is#in fact.#NOT about what i thought it was about#or more accurately it’s ALSO secretly about whatever’s going on with me in real life lmao#y’know what’s really fun? looking back at something you wrote in a manic or depressive episode and going ah. hm. interesting.#the signs were. in fact. there.#(this is in fact not fun and i don’t like it. but it always happens.)#everything i write is accidentally Also about being bipolar. no getting around that#i tend to have issues organizing my thoughts and feelings to even figure out how tf i’m feeling#(forget making any attempt at doing so verbally. i have chronic foot-in-mouth disorder and accidentally say shit i don’t mean all the time)#but writing stuff down has always helped me sort through whatever mess is going on in my noggin and i love it for that#learning how to take critique is my no. 1 piece of writing advice but no. 2 is to read#read the classics. find out why they’re classics. read weird shit. read shit you don’t like. find things you like about em anyway.#and importantly: figure out WHY you do or don’t like it#it’s funny to re-read a book i haven’t read in a long time and discover OH. that’s where i get that technique from.#or that’s where i got that idea. or that’s why i had X thing happen in this story.#or why i like this type of character or scenario#nothing’s truly new and original#we’re all an amalgamation of influences and that ruuuuules#celebrate it!!!
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so like. lately I've been feeling like there's some kind of Thing living in this house with me, like a spirit or creature or something, and i feel like it's been here a long time bc of how long things have been going missing in this house with no explanation. and i noticed when i got really badly sick i lost something and it made me like. sob uncontrollably bc it was important. and then i started Finding things in odd places. so i started thanking the mysterious entity. and now I'm finding More Stuff more often. and like i feel strange for believing in this entity bc I've always been told believing in pagan things is childish (??????) and feel awkward thanking it but also i Want To bc it's polite. anyway i wanna like. leave a little offering or something but don't know what would be appropriate bc i also dont know what entity this is
#first thought is like. house fairies#I've always thought it was something fae related i think?#but like i. don't really know a lot about real fairy folklore bc of all the Media I've consumed#i don't really know what's accurate and what isn't#like sometimes fairies are depicted as extremely powerful and like. human sized#sometimes they're just tiny little trickster guys#and also i don't know what folklore like. applies to me if that makes sense?????#im White™ and whatever culture my ancestors had was scrubbed away to force jesus in instead and i don't know how much my blood matters#I'm mostly german and welsh and was raised like. loosely catholic#and the word appropriation has been watered down so much by The Internet that i can never tell if I'm Doing That anymore#I'm just scared to do literally anything bc what if someone says i am#but also i feel very very drawn to certain myths and stories and entities and feel like letting that go would tear me apart in a way#like I'd just lose something and there'd be a hole that couldn't be filled by any other belief#I've TRIED to fit in other beliefs but they just don't click#i dunno. im scared of doing something wrong but it feels like home to me#anyway i want to leave an offering to this Entity in my house to thank it for returning some things#but dunno what i could use#do you think a fairy would appreciate lactose free vanilla coffee creamer. we dont have normal milk#i also wonder if candy would work. i have a ton of chocolate and caramel#though i also wonder if the Entity is stealing candy from the jars on my windowsill#i wouldn't mind that i don't mind sharing
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Cptsd brain be like: SHUT IT DOWN protecprotecprotec (don’t look at me/okay I am ALLOWING you to look at me) imsorry imsorry imsuchaburden wHYareyouevenHERE this is it i’ve finally screwed this up theymustthinkimweakandanidiotandoverreacting
…then…finally… with processing feeling this way for days and people who HAVE doggedly chosen to stay
…maybe…I won’t lose old&new.
#tiger’s roar#mental health bullshit#saw a post recently about ‘sometimes you can’t wait for your ducks in a row. you gotta scoop em up and make a run for it#’or you’re never crossing the street’ and…yeah. that is accurate#I give so much grace to others that I just struggle giving myself#…but…I do have my limits. i can get to the point of not wanting Any interaction the second I no longer need to keep a bridge stable#because cutting down bridges too soon wouldn’t have let me survive#sometimes you have to be ‘fine’ even when you don’t want to be#and…it was so hard to let someone New see that#but if I didn’t…I was afraid I’d accidentally ghost them Because of how much I Don’t want a community to find me on Newer social media#it’s…not like New hadn’t already seen my tendency to flee and didn’t know I have panic attacks and triggered reactions#but…this gave New the shape of it. and that is…terrifying#yes he’s shown himself to give a damn about me. admits where he struggles to reciprocate. expressed interest in reciprocation#of a different kind once that’s possible. is probably the only IRL I’ve never had to feel like I had to fight to be heard by#(well. kinda.)#so…he’s shown repeatedly he’s actually trustworthy. gives a damn about me and trying to learn my own boundariea#but…it’s still…hard.#but…I have to collect my ducklings and RUN anyway
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great news: the brainrot's terminal
youtube
special thanks to my sibling for providing the english translation
#kamen rider geats#kamen rider buffa#michinaga azuma#dear god did i forget how long video editing takes#i accurately remembered subtitling time at least#thank you xbox live recording feature for letting me live another day in the ignorance of how to hardsub because i am fucking impatient#anyways *screams*#thank q hamster loving sibling#youre the only mfer i trust out here#god knows we dont trust the wiki#also damn i havent uploaded to youtube in a hot minute#if this gets yeeted into the copyright void i will cry#not for long but i will cry#yeah so this is what i worked on instead of the episode 46 no spoiler meme review#a full spoiler review if you would :3#Youtube
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Haha don’t pay me any mind oho
#vent#ok. so#I was! fine for the most part today! but then! idk what happened!#I’m like sad now! depressed? like. I kinda don’t feel real#I think I was giving myself anxiety over thoughts. got really clammy. literally shoveled goldfish crackers into my face#now don’t judge me but#I’ve been looking at things that make me feel bad for like. at least 4 hours now haha..#I dunno man it’s the adhd I got one thought about thing that made me upset and now I’m hours in and my emotions are fried#and. shh don’t tell anyone I feel things but I know have a fantasy of someone I can cry around#whehe how pathetic is that. scraping the bottom of the barrel here looking for another human just let me cry @ you#hmm. how did I go from thinking up poems for valentines only to. feel so cold and alone#I’m not crying. but. I definitely need to later haha maybe this all kickstarted from my two whole hours of sleep last night 😎#mhm so uh. if your reading this with the most cold unfeeling monotone voice then you are exceptionally accurate!i am currently not all here#can’t sleep now tho gotta. do other shit I guess#I’m laying in bed for a second though. my legs were very cold to the touch. unfeeling unhuman#oh and I might be balding potentially but that’s still just a theory. my dad noticed and pointed it out#haha what would I be withought my hair? another germ just populating this Earth?#oho ahh. hm. I’m just a trying to say I don’t fell right now if that makes sense. anyways
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So uhh continuing off of this post but separately because that one was getting kinda long and also the topic has slightly changed-
This is like... Gotta be the 10th time Tall Boy has come up to me to talk to me about something completely random
Maybe he's just really friendly? Maybe he does this to everyone? He's also the only person that consistently responds to my messages in the group chat which makes me feel appreciated
I sent out a thing talking about how I hope everyone got some rest and that we all had a great show tonight and Tall Boy responded like... Immediately as per usual
And then also came up to me at the post show dinner and started talking about random things
And then our choir director put us next to each other in choir so now I sit directly beside him and he'll make random small talk to me when I don't think we've ever said two sentences to each other before September
So uhhh yeah do with that information what you will because I sure as hell don't know what to do with it
#panda posts#panda pines#tall boy#mystic before you come asking who im talking about i don't think you'd know him if i told you his name#but he is in the musical and literally if you take one look at this man you will immediately know who im referencing because of how fricken#tall he is-#so you'll see him tomorrow#also like... i have noticed that i very rarely get crushes anymore i think because i've realized im somewhere on the aro spectrum and have#been trying to define romance and like... there are people who the thought of them asking me out sends me spiralling because i don't know#them well enough and then there are people who it would just be awkward to date because i only see them as friends#and then there's people im friends with that i feel no romantic attraction towards but the thought of them asking me out does not send me#spiralling like bisexual girl and now km realizing tall boy#which is weird for me because i know... one singular guy that could ask me out without me freaking out about it and i've known him for...#7 years maybe? and then i've known of tall boy for 5 years but only really talked to him for three months and i still wouldn't necessarily#call is friends but yet for some reason the thought of tall boy asking me out doesn't scare me#which is extra weird because it tends to be taller guys that scare me the most because of what im blaming on the fear of amab people#instilled in afab people to 'protect them' but yeah-#anyways we stan tall boy please let me know what you think of his behavior or if you have more questions to draw an accurate conclusion
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