#anyways for those lurkers on my blog

[kitakami-zorua-kin]

Hey, I'm wondering when you took over this thing What were you doing? I guess looking for russet like it's unlikely you stumbled on this app/site by accident with Russets account. What were you even going/looking for initially? Also you said this is a waste of time somewhere, do you still think that I mean you are "socializing" more here then you are in school?

// I think I posted my last ask off anon, didn't push the button just pretend it is, on that account, maybe so you know it's me tormenting people, im the on-your-side anon or Oys for short, hi.

Anyway great work on the blog I said this before but I love this all even if I'm new, still trying to backread on stuff, I like what im reading so far.

Have a nice day/evening/night/morning

... I was coming to look for Russet. I found one of his notebooks - he really needs to stop fucking losing them - so I was going to give it back to him. I found his computer still running and decided to check it, since last I knew, he didn't use the damn thing.

... I still don't see the point to the website. I don't really get it. I don't need to socialize, I don't need people to like me. All I've done here is argue with people, which feels... Pointless. The whole thing seems like more trouble than it's worth.

[eydi-andrius]

Clear Lilac Eyes (Aemond Targaryen x Reader)

summary: Aemond had bowed and prayed, something he had never done before no matter how hard his life had been.

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cw/tw: fluff, a bit of angst and hurt, aemond is a good husband, a dad and a king, childbirth, blood, implied war, patriarchy, threats, mentions of violence, threats and tags are not exhausted. Let me know if I miss anything

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a/n: Wrote this as an alternate ending for Don't Get Sad, Get Even but I thought it was too positive so I wrote it as a standalone.

Also, I posted this as a celebration as my blog turned THREE (3) today! YAY! 🎉🥳 Mannnnn, I used to be a lurker on this app then I started craving for my whatifs then wrote them. To celebrate, I will post for all the characters I have written so far and it includes this one. And maybe I have something in store for the others. 👀 A much awaited comeback hehehehehe if you have any request, you may send me an ask! 🥰 I may write them. 👀 Anyway, without further ado, ENJOY!

Likes and reblogs are welcome!

💚

There was an air of uneasiness that chokes out the life of those who breathe it in. The flicker of fire from the torches and the quiet of the hallways made an eerie atmosphere in the Red Keep. 

The shadows, the footfalls and the swish of clothings intensifies the feeling of distress in every mortal present at the birth of the King's child. 

This was an important event for the realm as this child may become the first heir to this new era of dragons. 

All the dragon-blood and silver-haired were almost wiped during the dance of dragons which happened for only a year.

Except for one. 

With his wit and strategy, Aemond Targaryen was able to win the war and was crowned king.

He was vicious and no one could deny him of his throne. Once the swords were down and the white flags were raised, all heads bowed to him.

However, right now, the King's head was bowed to only one, the Mother. The Goddess of Birth. 

While the realm was weary for his heir, he was scared to lose the love of his life.  

She had always expressed her fear of giving birth. When they were young, she had said to him that if she had a choice, she would rather not give birth. During that time, he thought it was silly. No one can run from their purpose. Especially her, whose sole purpose was to continue her family's lineage. She was a noble and a girl. There was no way for her to continue life without giving birth. 

Another blood curdling scream broke from her inside the room. It was loud. Terrifyingly loud. His gut twisted in fear. He had promised her not to enter the chambers while she gives birth but something was egging him on to force his way inside and to stay by her side. 

The room was filled with the familiar sweet metallic scent of blood. He had grown accustomed to it on the battlefield and never once the sight repulsed him. However, the white sheets and the white clothes worn by the maester and midwives were all covered in blood. Her blood. There was too much blood around her. The sickening feeling swirling inside of him tore new fear as he rushed forward and watched her delicate face, pale and deathly. Her lips dry and her hands cold to the tips. 

"My Lady wife, look at me, my dear. I beg of you " He watched her closely as her eyes fluttered softly at the sound of his voice. She looked at him and tried her best to give a smile but the look of it made him regret forcing her to go through the pain of giving birth. She slowly opened her eyes and looked at him before it closed with a deep sigh. He squeezed her cold hands with worry - he prayed that the Mother will show his wife mercy, as she did to all the mothers who had gone through similar pain.

A tiny scream of life caught his attention. He looked behind him and there it was, his child. He never saw that she had finally given birth and was blinded with worry as he rushed in. His small bundle of joy was wrapped in the familiar green and gold linen his mother used for him when he was born. His pride and joy finally came and his heart was filled with unfamiliar warmth. He had never felt like this before.

Without removing his hand that held his wife, he asked the maester to help him place his little dragon on his free arm. The silver protruding hairs on his head had proven he was his child. He looks so small, so full of life as it cries and he shushes him. He had never felt more at ease as he was surrounded with his family. The family he chooses and who chooses him. His love for them runs deeply and he could never express how grateful he was for them.

"It is a girl." The sound of the maester's voice brought him back to where he was sitting and he looked at him. The maester's face did not hide his disappointment but he will forgive him for now.

A girl? 

A smile broke through him and he apologized inside his head to his daughter as he called her wrong. With a gesture of love, he placed his nose on top of hers and his heart was full as he heard her stop crying and coo at him.

He was overfilled with happiness. It feels like nothing could go wrong. 

However, his joy was short-lived when he felt his wife's hand loosen its grip to his. He had now realized her palm was colder, almost like ice. His head whipped in her direction and he saw the familiar feeling of impending death. 

No. Please. Not her either.

The wrong feeling in his gut came back again and he ordered the maester to help his wife. They rushed forward and he stepped back as he cradled the child, who was now peacefully sleeping on his arm. She must have been tired as she forced her way out to this world. She was so innocent and pure that she did not realize the terror that was eating away at his father's core.

He had watched them closely as they tried their best to bring his lady wife back to life. She looks so small, and fragile. He was afraid that they would break her as they moved back and forth to revive her.

The wet nurse of his child had asked and begged him to go out but he refused to do so and did not leave the room until the maester had told him that his wife was safe from harm. No one could tell when she would wake up but he was relieved that she could recover now.

At last, he had entrusted his child to her caretaker and asked the others to leave them be. Him alone with his wife. He waited for the sound of the door closing, before he broke down. With shaking limbs and eyes blurry with tears, he cried and kissed her hand.

He apologized for what he had put her through. He apologized for what she had to witness. 

He apologized for exposing her to violence. 

He apologized and apologized until there wasn't anything he could say to her. 

If the life of his wife would be the retribution for his sins then he would never forgive himself. 

That night, on his knees, he prayed and prayed for her to get better until there were no words he could utter to the Mother.

💚

Three days had passed and she was still asleep. He had smiled at her sleeping form as he recalled his interaction he had with his daughter. She was fussy and loud, just like her mother. He knew she would grow up with her mother's tenacity and boldness. 

Ignoring her pale face and thin body, he bit the inside of his cheek and continued his story. This was worse than war. Sitting beside her and watching as she fights for her life. Waiting and not being able to help her. He hoped that his stories would make her feel strong. 

He never liked the idea of her missing the growth of their child. He knew her better and this will make her sad. She had expressed that she had always wished for her mother to see her grow when she was young but she died too early for her to even remember her face, which people had claimed that they looked quite a lot like each others'.

He could never deny that there is no moment that he never missed her. Every inch and corner of Red Keep reminds him of her. Half of his life was him being with her. He wanted each and every waking moment of his was to be with her.

Swallowing his selfishness and pride, again, he prayed for her to get well and wake up soon. He bargained to all of the Gods that he will do anything and pay for it in his power to make it come true. 

💚

The council room was obnoxiously loud. He watched them quietly like a hunter, staring down its prey.

If he had the choice, he would be with his daughter and wife. But alas, he had to create a strong foundation for this new nation for his lovely daughter. He had to muster all the patience he had to stay still and listen to them. 

After the discussion about the trade and economy, suddenly, all the old men present looked at him warily. Even without them uttering a word, he knew what they would tell him. 

A searing hot anger rises through him but he feels calm. Calm enough to not hesitate to stab and kill with ease, just like what he did during the war. Or maybe he could ask Vhagar to bite them off in half or burn them alive. 

"Congratulations on having a girl, your grace. How was she?" He forgot that man's name but he believed the one who first opened his mouth was a Baratheon. 

"My girl was doing well." He replied curt and short. 

He saw how some of the men gulped in nervousness at the sound of his voice. He intended for them to feel the venom and challenge them to continue so he can cut their tongue. They looked nervous and fear was all over their features. Only Larys and Cregan, looked somewhat calm and remained quiet. 

"We're happy to h-hear that." The Baratheon continued with eyes wandering around his allies, like a helpless sheep waiting to be slaughtered. Aemond moved back and leaned on his chair, he wanted to see them all on a better view. He lay his head to his hand as he stared them down.

The silence was loud as everyone stayed seated and waited for each other. No one dares to. They were afraid. Aemond, the King, was ruthless. They knew bloodshed would be inevitable if they opened their mouths to speak about the dying Queen and the King having no heir after she gave birth to a daughter. 

Each one prefers their head intact, except for one. Or maybe the wise old folk of the North had better places to be and so he started the conversation with a tired sigh. 

"I thought you have something to say about the Queen, boy." He looked at the young Baratheon who was seated across him with emotionless eyes. 

The Baratheon stared at Cregan and the air shifted. The old wolf calling his name had given him confidence to open his mouth and talk about the real reason why this council meeting was held in the first place.

"Your grace, as much as we all pray for the Queen to get better. Please understand that we talk about this with the clearest intention in mind. After what happened to the Queen and the uncertainty of her health, we believed that it would be better to take another wife…..for the sake of our budding kingdom. In that way, we could secure an heir." He spoke with an air of superiority. As if he truly knew what he was talking about. 

Aemond stared at the man. He doesn't know how long it was but he just looked at him. The silence was uncomfortable and some of the gentlemen in front of him looked nervous as they waited for him to speak. 

"Y-your grace?" After some time, the Baratheon spoke again. 

He breathed in and finally, with an intense stare at the fool in front of him, he spoke with a neutral chilling tone.

"Did you know how the war started in the first place, boy?" He tipped his head and waited for an answer. 

Not knowing what to reply, the Baratheon boy blinked and looked around for help. But when no one could give him an answer he replied, confused. 

"Your grace?" 

"When my beloved lady wife was almost dying from childbirth, I suddenly remembered how and why we were all here. Why thousands of lives were lost. Why did dragons almost die and were wiped out?" He said with a menacing smirk. 

"You see, it started on this very council. Who were greedy for power to have the dragon blood on their lineage. To have their blood on the throne. And a foolish king who wore his heart on his sleeves. Those greedy old men pretended to truly care for him by using the memory of his wife and in the end feasted on his heart, voraciously. "He was way too lenient for his own good and once he realized he was being used, it was too late to change anything." My mother once told me. 

And I — I always saw my father as someone who swims along the current because he trusts way too easily, not knowing that there were sharp rocks waiting for him at the end. Even if I knew he wouldn't give me the love of a father as he should, I respect him for being the king. I believed he did his best to be a good one and a fair father to us. It doesn't mean it was enough though." 

Aemond stared from afar as he recalled how he envied his sister. How she got all the love they deserved to have too. It was never their fault to be treated that way and so he blamed all of it on her. But after the war and during the time his wife had suffered the similar fate of the former Queen, he realized how lonely his father might have felt. He realized how his sister might have suffered from being a girl. It was a strong slap on his face as he sat in the middle of this council and watched how these men didn't care about what he had to endure and how the life of his wife was the only reason why he was keeping sane. They will never understand, never. 

"Your grace, w-we cannot understand-" 

"Of course you wouldn't. None of you would." He cut him off before he could continue to rebuke him. 

"If the Queen dies right after this meeting, those who had agreed to have me married for another one would be beheaded for treason. If she did not survive even though her body has been doing well for days, I will treat her death as intentional from all of you. Speak again of her that way, head will roll, and blood will soak the iron throne. The only reason why you do not have a mad King, who craves death, was because of her." 

He stood up and did not care with the way the men yelled in unison of their protest against what he said. The only ones who stayed seated were Larys and Cregan, who both shook their heads. He did not care if they agreed with him. His wife will not die and he will protect her even if it means he has to be a Mad King. 

💚

He stayed seated beside her, just like what he has been doing these days. 

He chooses to be with her at night. He cannot stand to sleep in their room without her. It feels empty and cold. 

The barren room, even though filled with gold and riches, feels like another room in a gloomy castle. 

Each night, he stayed with her. Talk to her until he falls asleep on her side. He will either hold her hand or weave his hand through her hair, to soothe her. Sometimes, he even sings to her in High Valyrian, hoping that she will hear him and finally open her eyes. She always tells him she loves his voice when he speaks his native tongue. 

He waited and waited but it seems like today was like any other night. She needed a whole day of sleep to recuperate. He slowly closed his eyes after he kissed her goodnight. And prayed again that tomorrow, is the day she will smile at him again. 

A caress…

He cannot help but smile at the soft feathery caress on his face. It reminds him so much of how she wakes him up in the morning. What a beautiful dream..

A dream…

He frowned when he realized it was just a dream. She was still asleep and sick. And with his brows knit together, he relinquished the soft touch of fingers on his face. It feels familiar and welcoming. 

Just a bit more, he wanted to feel that she's with him. 

He was slowly going back to sleep, after what happened today, he seemed tired than usual, and it did not take long as the sleep tugged him back again when a tap jolted him awake. 

Even though the war ended a long time ago, his senses were still heightened and he was glad he wasn't wearing his sword or so he probably would have killed whoever forcefully woke him up. 

A smile….

He stared, mouth agape, when he saw you giving him a tired smile. He blinked and then, he panicked as he rushed forward at you, careful not to hurt you with his weight.

"My love.." He said with so much worry in his voice. He was feeling the tears threatening to come out of his eyes as he gazed at her pale face and dry lips. He doesn't even know how he will touch her. A moment of hesitation, his hands stopped midair as he panics that he might break her. What if he hurt her unintentionally and she fell asleep again?

He watched her as she tried to move her mouth but failed. She swallowed and tried again. This time he went to where the water and cup was placed and he helped her up to drink. She was thirsty and her mouth is probably dry from being asleep for a long time. Aemond calm yourself! She needed you more than now.

Once done, he carefully assisted her to lean on the headboard and she sighed with relief. 

He was just looking at her. And she was looking back at him. It took a while, the staring, until his face contorted with relief and then, he cried. He was shaking as he held her hand. She felt her fragile hands weave through his hair as she shushed him. He knew she was smiling. Glad to be back on his arms. 

He never felt so relieved and so thankful. 

All his life the people, his loved ones and even the gods did not like him. 

No matter how much he tried his best. No matter how much he was better he will never be chosen for he was only a second son. He was there as a safety but never the one.

But you choose him. And never did your love wavered. 

He never felt so hopeless when you were in pain and bedridden. 

He never felt so useless despite doing his best to be the strongest for his family. 

It was the first time he felt so inadequate and weak. That he gave all of his strength to kneel and pray for you whenever he could. He begged and promised that he would do anything in his power just so he could have you back. 

And now, crying in your middle like a child, as you held him as tight as he did, he prayed for gratefulness. 

💚

A week after you woke up, you are still not strong enough to walk outside. 

You relinquished the sun on your window and watched as Aemond carried and sways your daughter. 

You have a feeling that the reason why he was able to be in your room, as much as he could, was because he threatened the nobles every time they tried to stop him. You tried to talk to him once, compromising that he doesn't have to be with you, almost the whole day, but he shrugged and rolled his eyes, stating that he would rather be with his wife than be surrounded by men. 

Aemond can be stubborn but he never runs from his obligations so this was truly new for you. 

You giggled as you watched your lord husband's eyes widen from surprise. He was teasing your daughter by placing his finger in her small palm, when she closed and squeezed him tight, never letting go. His eyes softened when she cooed at him. 

He looks so different from when they call him the one-eyed prince for being vicious and fearsome. You were truly loved by the gods for witnessing this interaction and being one of the centers of his affection. 

"I will make her my heir." He said with a plain voice, as if he was asking you how you were. 

"My love?" You frowned, confused. You have witnessed Rhaenyra being crowned heir and how the war started from there. What is going on?

"I will change the law to make the eldest an heir. No matter what gender they may be, they will be given the same education and treatment, fit as the next ruler. If the nobles disagree, not that I care about them, I will also add that a female heir and noble will always have a noble child. Compared to a prince, a boy, the one she would carry will have noble blood in their veins. I will use my life, my reign to establish this. My daughter will be heir and no man, no noble, will be able to take that from her." The initial worry and confusion you felt from earlier vanished, as you watched him share his plan with the softest eyes. The setting sun at the window, creating a soft silhouette of him carrying his daughter. He loves her more than the throne. Something you have never witnessed before. 

It warms your heart and you never thought you would fall deeper in love with him this much in this lifetime. You will forever be happy that he chose you. 

"My love…..you always prove to me why I choose you every single waking moment of my life." Without thinking you opened your mouth and spoke the words that always lingered in your end. 

Surprised, he stared at you and then, he smiled in awe. You don't even need him to speak for you to know that his eyes and soften feature was him telling you that he loves you. 

[whiteboi-inferiority]

Some of you been trying to get in touch lately. That's cool.

If you're just swinging by to say hi and thanks, then what follows doesn't apply to you.

You want me to talk to you though? Some hints and tips (and very common mistakes to avoid) that will increase your chances of an actual conversation or two and from there, who knows.

The best way is to have a blog with some original content. Pics of you, stories, captions, whatever. I'm looking for commitment and authenticity, some skin in the game, some evidence of actual fucking effort. In your message don't just fawn. I don't need that. Be brief, be articulate, be confident in what you like and what you bring to the table and be clear on why you want a place with me, specifically, over any generic black guy or Dom. Job interview etiquette applies and know I get 4 or 5 'candidates' a day. Respect the fact I am a busy guy with a life away from here, several real life submissives, and several more long distance things going on. My girls, gurls and bois are all different, all exquisite, and they all interest me in different ways. It's on you to show me what i'm missing and why I'm going to make time for you. Be a muse, be amusing. Wow me.

So!

If you have an empty blog, don't bother. I'm not interested in lurkers.

If your blog is just reposts of the usual stuff I've seen 100 times before, don't bother.

If you're just going to start contact with 'hey...', don't bother. I'm not interested.

If you're just looking for someone, anyone, to Dom you for the 2 minutes it takes for you to jerk off, don't bother. I'm not a jack off service.

If your blog is full of explicit hard core porn, don't bother - your account will be deactivated soon and you'll probably be disappeared before we start chatting away from here anyway. You don't represent a good ROI of my time. Of the 4 or 5 of you that make contact today, 2 of you will be gone tomorrow, and at least 1 more within the month. Even duvluvv and bangmybully my previous mainstays and inspo on this blog have managed to fuck that up and get themselves banned.

Unless your wife/gf/mom/daughter is hot, living near me and interested in hooking up, I don't care that you wish you could see them suck a cock like a Blacked girl right in front of you. If I can't see it, smell it, hear it, taste it or feel it - if its not actually going to happen on my cock - I don't care.

Outright headcanon fantasists and part-timers who 'don't need to dress up because they can imagine it so well...', hard pass. If I tell you to feminise yourself, take a pic in a certain pose, jerk off a certain way or make a post about something it isn't a question of whether you feel you need that to sustain your little fantasy. It's a question of whether you're going to pay the price of submission to talk to me. If you can't or won't follow simple instruction, then I have no interest in you.

Those of you who confuse sissy with trans, hard pass. Trans women are women. You are not a woman just because you fantasise about being sexually submissive and effeminate around a black man. You're a sissy, a toy, a whiteboi fuckdoll. That's all. If you can't or don't accept that, don't bother. Trans and sissy = OK. Thinking sissy makes you trans = not OK.

FLR, ABDL, Gooners: kittens I adore seeing you relinquish your masculinity and pride to roll around in your own shame and filth. But to be clear: these kinks are your weaknesses, not my interests. I cater to you because my mission is to enable every single last one of you whiteboi fucks to become codependent emasculated bottom-feeders of one kind or another, willingly, done by yourselves to yourselves, stripped of the convenient deniability of coercion. I'm fixing to cook and push good quality junk so you can fuck yourselves up, not share the needle. Definitely not looking to change your fucking diapers.

If you clearly haven't read this pinned note, don't bother.

Stay sticky, losers

D

[hurlingdown]

I’m usually a lurker, but the other anons talking about their fav side charas have inspired me. i also dont know how to do transitions so i'm just gonna jump into it.

I want to ruin Izou. I want to fuck him in his pretty clothes and make up, and reduce him to a crying, cockdrunk mess.

It probably starts off slow, you havent let him take his clothes off, only pushing them to the side to gain access and start eating him out. He'll complain that he doesnt want to get his clothes dirty but his hands are in your hair, holding you there as he grinds his clit against your tongue. His moans are quiet, and that just wont do, you want to hear his pretty voice get wrecked as he cries out your name. He’s still keeping up his usual demeanor, acting composed like he isn't dripping around your tongue like a leaky faucet. Of course, you know how to fix that. And right before he can cum, your hands are on his hips, stopping him from moving.

Before he can start being a brat, you tell him to get on his hands and knees - Still not letting him take off his clothes. You get undressed just enough to free your cock and push the fabric of his clothes up. You push your dick against his slick folds, covering it with his juices. You probably don't even need any lube, you can just slide in from just how wet he is. You slowly work him up again, pulling pretty moans out of him with each thrust. When you think he's being too quiet you give his hair a nice tug, drawing a loud moan out of him. The absolutely desperate whine he lets out when you bring jim to the edge again only to stop,, god it almost makes you take pity on him. But no, you want him to be truely wrecked when he finally cums. So you flip him onto his back and start again. This time you undo his yukata and push it open to fondle his tits- of course you dont let him take it off completely.

Maybe at some point you just focuse on his chest, fondling, marking, sucking; neglecting his needy pussy. Hes humping the air, trying to press your cock back into his empty hole; whining and being a bit of a brat. You hold his hips down and tell him to stop being a brat. When youre done abusing his tits, you kiss your way down to his leaking cunt; telling him if he can be a good boy and keep his hands to himself while you eat him out, you'll let him cum.

Of course, he fails. Right when hes on the cusp of orgasm, his hands fly down to your hair, gripping it tightly and desperately trying to hump your face as he begs for you to keep going. Tears falling when you pull away and leave him on the edge again. And so it starts again. You tell him he can cum if he can be a good boy, only to stop when he fails and start all over.

By the end, his clothes are a mess, covered in all the slick thats been leaking all night from his pretty pussy; make up smeared from his tears after you've edged him for the umpteenth time. He's long since given up his usual composure, having become a loud whiney mess begging for you to let him cum.

Satisfied, you start moving again. Pretty thighs twitch around your hips as you begin to move faster, working him up and drawing the most beautiful whimpers and moans from him- those noises only barely louder than the slick wet sounds coming from his pussy.

When he finally comes, he squirts- hard- adding the wet mess on his clothes. His walls are clenching around you as you fuck him through his high, finally coming deep inside him with his thighs locked around your hips.

Anyways…. umm didnt expect to write that much. Srry if it aint that good, im a little rusty when it comes to writing. Ah well.

Love your blog! Thanks for listeing to my ramble

ohhhhhh fuck yes. holy fucking shit. forgive me i've kept this in my inbox for days because i wanted to make sure i digested everything before answering the ask, and damnnnn.

this was so hot. i've always thought that kiku and izou should be more popular characters to send in thirsts on, so i've been waiting for this one. the way you write is obscenely good, you could start your own writing blog (if you haven't yet) and i'd read all your works. <3

[m1d-45]

Literally a lurker on your blog since ur early days but too shy to slide into ur ask box, hiii!!! I keep seeing cryo anon and teddy anon's brainrots and asks,,,, and like, regarding post impostor AU hehe

imagine after the hunt when your fave character/vessel begs you for forgiveness the most, practically turning their voice hoarse from their pleas to share just a bit of your mercy....

(you never showed your face to them, even when they were your most favored. how selfish of them, wanting more than they could ever deserve. but they can't help it. if you wanted them to die a thousand times over to repent, they would. just please, look at them again.)

post imposter au always tickles an itch in my brain I've never known existed. angry creator? boiling hot rage creator for their acolytes killing them when they've shown nothing but love and kindness for this world?? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP LORD

I wanna see guilt. And I mean GUILT. it's probably cause I'm petty asf and if I would be killed over and over and over again only for them to realize I'm not the fake I would literally lock myself up in whatever tower they built for me and never talk again. Creator's trust? Shattered, irreparable. Followers? Wallowing in the despair.

Thank u and goodbye heh. If it's not too much, can I be called Marcotte anon? Hehe fontaine reference hhhh,, anyways have a good day ily and ur fics <3

post-hunt can be incredibly good, entirely agree

the love you felt for the world is so strong already, and it only grows as you finally get to teyvat. being here, feeling the elemental energy, feeling the world greet you as you return after your rest.. what hate is more powerful than a love turned rotten?

you hid behind your veil, uncertain if you’re protecting yourself or them. it hurts to see their eyes tearing up as they plead, but what else are you to do? your hands shake when they draw close, and you can’t erase your own memory.

(you’d know. you asked nahida about it, but she’d only shaken her head. all she could do was clear the memories of teyvat, but not yours. it hurt, but was probably for the best.)

(despite it being a failure, that day was the calmest you’d felt in weeks. she was easy to talk to, and made lovely tea. perhaps you should visit again, if only to take a break from… everything.)

your solitude is comfortable, most of the time. a few of the hunters are a bit too comfortable with their sin, and are the ones tasked with bringing you food and other necessities. it’s not much better, though, since you can still see the guilt sinking in their eyes.

it’s a lose-lose all around. you want to see them, you want to see the world, but every leaf and branch is stained with the memories of the past, what used to be your favorite retreat now something else to hide from.

part of you is angry. furious at how easily they were tricked. it’s hard to stay mad at those you love, though, so you end up sitting in your window and watching the wind blow safely behind glass. your tea is from inazuma, this time, the faint edge of bitterness keeping you from sinking too far into much of anything.

leaves dance in the breeze. you won’t be seen again until they’ve long turned brown.

[benzakii]

my debut from the shadows and love letter to the fandom

this is my first attempt at graduating from lurker status..

dear kidstar and soma content contributors ,

while you don't know me, i've been familiar with you all for a REALLY long time. that sounds so creepy but i've been a silent supporter, saving your art and rereading your fics.

as i've watched the fandom get smaller and the archives get dryer year after year, i've been increasingly grateful to those whose passions haven't died. your content has gotten me through a lot of hard times and has allowed for me to maintain my own passion through consuming your great works.

even though i've had plenty of ideas and head cannons of my own, i've been content as a viewer. i check the archives every other day with baited breath hoping for any chapter updates or new stories but again, they've become few and far in between. and that's okay. we all have our own lives to live. but in that same breath, i don't think it's fair for me to expect people to create, when i myself have been hoarding my own ideas and (very few) creations. and while i am not (ever) a fan of my own work, someone else may appreciate some more contributions to the fandom.

all this to say that i'm gonna use this blog to try to contribute more and publish any of my prior creations even if i'm inconsistent and they're imperfect and incomplete. i'm also doing this in hopes to rekindle my own dead passions and as a way to honor all of my countless ideas that have now passed haha.

anyways, ill stop my rambling and i'm looking forward to being apart of this.

ps. i would @ specific authors and artists but that makes me too nervous lol, maybe later.

[putschki1969]

hello, thanks for uploading the audio rip of kaji fes day 1 and 2! is it possible if you make a ISO image rip of the Bluray and create a torrent file for it ? :) we usually download some ISO from jpopsuki just few days after release but somehow nobody have uploaded ISO of kajifes there yet XD

Hello there. Sorry for the delay, I've been holding off on replying to your question for a while. To be fair, when I saw this in my inbox just a DAY after my response to the Kaji Fes. MP3 ask, I was more than a little annoyed.

It's not like your message is inherently rude or anything (in fact, it's a bit more polite than the usual stuff I get) but it tells me TWO things about you:

You either purposefully ignored everything I wrote in that Kaji Fes. MP3 post or you never actually saw my original post and got the download link from someone who reposted it to another site. If you had made an effort to read my response from a few days ago, you would know that I always planned to share rips but first, I needed to receive my package. People are really out there thinking I have immediate access to everything. That is a misconception! The truth is, just like so many of us, I am at the mercy of endless shipping/customs procedures and have to wait very long for stuff to arrive at my place. Then I need to find the time to do all the ripping/encoding while working a full-time job and also having a life.

You've never actually visited my blog and thought it would be a good idea to use your first time here to make a huge request. I seriously doubt that you are one of my regular followers or lurkers because in all of my years running this blog, I've never ever provided t0rrents so I have no idea where you would get that idea from. Yes, I share a lot of content but I do this by uploading reasonably HQ files in converted formats to Google Drive for archival purposes. Early on, I considered providing ISO files but they proved to be too troublesome to handle on a personal cloud (they take too long to upload/download and use up way too much storage space - I already pay more than enough for my current plan). Also, I wholeheartedly believe that those who want raw files should simply BUY the Blu-rays and do the ripping themselves. You can't have high standards like that and not be willing to invest the necessary money and time. Contrary to what people may believe (based on the content I share), I am a big proponent of supporting artists by buying their releases. My main goal is to make life easier for overseas fans who struggle to overcome the countless hurdles between us and Japanese media but that certainly doesn't entail providing everything in the highest quality imaginable. To sum things up, all you can ever expect on my blog are encoded files which should have high enough quality to satisfy the vast majority of people.

Anyway, enough about that. I have good news! My package FINALLY arrived yesterday. BANZAI! Depending on how busy I am, I will hopefully be able to get the files uploaded by Thursday *fingers crossed*

[ultrameganicolaokay]

I, perhaps understandably, don't seem to get updates on my tumblr anniversaries (so I thought I'd just do this one myself), but, see, the the thing is... I was one of those lurkers with a blank blog for years before I first actually posted something. Which was, yes, five years ago today. Yay!

So, anyway... I guess I just wanted to say thanks. Thanks for the likes, posts, follows, reblogs, blocks, messages, crabs, Ides of March, Spooky Seasons, Goncharovs, boops and all the other stuff I'm forgetting about right now. It means a lot to me. Here's to another five years blah blah blah...

[aringofsalt]

hi sarah, i'm a lurker here but i just wanted to message you and say that no matter what has happened or will happen in canon, i'm so glad i found the bucktommy community on tumblr and specifically your blog. you're a fantastic writer and artist and you always give such measured, mature responses to whatever is happening in this fandom. thank you for letting us share in that <3

when i tell you i woke up and read this and nearly cried 😭 thank you so much anon 💛💛💛

i'm going to be taking at least a little step back from watching the show as a whole, again, not due to the breakup itself but how i feel it was handled on screen and in the interviews.

i know we're all angry and disappointed—i am too, deeply so—and i don't blame a single person who wants to take that step back, whether it be a break or permanently leaving the fandom

but. for me? this message itself is honestly a perfect example of why i'm not going anywhere. i've been really blessed with the community and friends i've found since coming back to tumblr a couple years ago, and the last six months in particular have been so lovely.

there is so much creativity and positivity and love in this little corner of the fandom, despite everything we dealt with. look at everything we did in the last six months! there's been so much amazing fic and beautiful art and community projects and frankly... i'm clinging to those positives for dear life. because i, for one, desperately need that and i know for a fact that i'm not alone in that.

anyway, all that to say, i'm not planning on going anywhere anytime soon. i'm still gonna be on this hellsite yapping about my little guys with you all. if you ever feel like not lurking, my inbox and dms are always open to anyone who wants to talk, either here or on discord (also aringofsalt over there)

i love you all 💛

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

first time anon but long time lurker and as always I find myself back to your blog(s). Was going through your masterposts (mainly hp but I look forward to diving once more in meta and fics about twilight too) and was wondering how come that nobody pieces together the clues and realises that lupin is a werewolf? (name aside, the bloke was disappearing and feeling poorly around every full moon and was for 7 years in a castle with the same people and nobody expect his dorm mates noticed??)

My question is, is wizardkind this oblivious/stupid/reliant on magic and looking things at surface level?

Would love to hear your thoughts about it bc I agree with many things in your meta posts and I'm kinda curious.

have a good day ✨

Because why would he be?

Why's There a Werewolf on Campus?

Why would Hogwarts be housing a werewolf? The idea, I imagine, would be untenable to anyone. And if they were unwittingly, surely, they would have noticed and done something about it? Lupin was able to remain hidden because he had extra support from Dumbledore as Headmaster. Dumbledore made it so Lupin had a place to hide during his transformations, so there was no wolf rampaging around the halls.

To suspect somebody's a werewolf, you have to say to yourself, "The staff knowingly is supporting a werewolf on campus" and that's if they suspect anything in the first place. Which they really don't have any reason to.

And even then, remember for most people that aren't Harry living in Harry canon, Hogwarts is supposed to be a safe and wonderful place. It's not supposed to be filled with horrible monsters/death around every corner. The idea of a werewolf being on campus would be something that would be as anathema to there being a troll on campus!

Remember that in canon, the HP parents were appalled when they found out that Lupin was a werewolf, and the man was immediately sacked.

He Ain't the Stereotype

Lupin, especially at a young age, would not look like what wizards and witches would think a werewolf would. While the whole point is that werewolves can be anybody, a young boy (even if he is scarred) who's still growing just isn't going to match the haunting image of Fenrir Greyback for people.

People are not going to look at his face and thing "WEREWOLF". In fact, given how sickly he acts (and unless these people are aware of how werewolves actually act around the full moon), they're probably going to think, well, sickly.

Who Notices Anyway?

Harry and the other students in canon notice that Lupin seems to be sickly/become regularly sick. Roughly once a month (but remember that the modern western calendar doesn't exactly line up with the lunar cycle) Lupin looks awful, and then he disappears for a few days and Snape comes to lecture them and says, "YOU LITTLE FUCKS EVER THINK ABOUT WEREWOLVES?!"

And even then, the HP students don't put it together (see above, why would their professor be a werewolf), even when they're looking up at the sky every night for astronomy (and either tracking the lunar cycle or else on non-overcast nights at least getting a chance to observe it).

And these are people in a position where they see and notice the man regularly. He is professor to all of these students; he is a person that everyone in the school will notice when he's absent and when he's not.

Lupin as a student would not be. First, the only people who would really notice him missing, consistently, are those he shares classes with, which is going to be mostly Gryffindor. Even then, most people are not going to be looking for him specifically, so you really narrow it down to a) people in Lupin's year and b) Lupin's friends who care.

Those who do know that Lupin is regularly sick--well, it's just that, the dude has magical tuberculosis or something. He's clearly only just healthy enough to attend Hogwarts, but every once in a while, he pushes it too hard and woops has to go on bedrest for a little while. If he's not seen in the dorms, people either assume he's in his dorm room (which people outside of the inhabitants don't have much reason to regularly enter) or he's in the Hospital Wing.

No one's going to notice that when Lupin disappears exactly coincides with the full moon plus or minus a few days.

Except, of course, his roommates who do see that whenever this happens--his bed is empty at night. Where exactly does he go? If he's going to St. Mungo's, why doesn't he say? James, Sirius, and Peter were in a unique position to notice far more about Remus's habits, the truth of where he is or isn't, than anyone else in the castle.

And if Anyone Did Think It, Which Why Would They...

Remus has his roommates and friends to cover for him, which I'm sure they did. They ensure anyone who thinks to ask that Remus is totally in their dorm room, sick as a dog (hur hur hur).

And why would they have reason to lie about this?

Similarly, this requires McGonagall and Dumbledore to be witting and lying, as if Remus was simply sickly, they would surely know and have made arrangements for him being in the hospital wing all the damn time/having to skip class so much.

And why would they have reason to lie about one of their students being a werewolf?

TL;DR

It's such a preposterous concept to most people, that they have no reason to ever even suspect that Remus Lupin was a werewolf.

They probably thought Lupin had wizard consumption.

[daisymae-12]

Hi Mae! It's nice ask day so I'm here to ask how you came up with the idea to start the @rwrbficrec blog? It's such a great blog and something that's been missing from the fandom for a long time 💖 I was excited to see it when you first popped up!

RAE Thank you so much for this question! ❤️❤️❤️ 

@rwrbficrecs origin story here we go (spoiler alert: it’s not that exciting of a story 😂)

I kinda had one of those days where I didn’t feel like trawling through AO3 and just wanted to read fics off a rec list and I thought I’d go looking for a rwrb rec blog! Imagine my surprise when I couldn’t find one. I thought for sure someone would have started one already 😬

Anyway I was telling my husband about my failed search and I was jokingly like “haha I should make one”. He was like “yeah why not, it’ll be a good project for you.” and I was like “huh maybe I will then 😂”

I brainstormed for a couple of days and we talked about all the spreadsheets and stuff he could do with his coding. He encouraged me some more 😂 and tbh he was right, I did need a project. I haven’t been able to work for the last two years for health reasons and I’d started feeling a bit adrift. It was the perfect thing for me to focus on, and it was nice to be passionate about something again! 

But I was honestly pretty nervous about it. Up until that point I was a lurker in the fandom - I’d been reading rwrb fics for years but I’d spoken to literally nobody in the fandom. I’m a really shy person so I expected to just be quietly making lists and that would be that 😅   

But then everyone was so nice and welcoming?! And then things spiralled from there and I’m just amazed that I went from 100% lurking to running a blog + discord community + making actual friends 🥺🥺🥺 Being able to contribute to the fandom in this way has been so lovely 🥺 Life’s wild and I’m so so glad I decided to create the blog ❤️

tl;dr I was looking for a rec blog, couldn’t find one, husband told me I should make it myself 😂

[szhmidty]

They are closing ranks around the confirmed pornbot

Hm, I'm not sure "confirmed" pornbot is the appropriate language here. The blog in question was known to post porn and known to send sugar daddy messages to random people.

There are real users who do that. If you run a porn blog, you'll run into them. The sticking point for me was that @honoratacarnage, the user who highlighted the sugar daddy spam, is not a porn blog: they're an art blog, and pretty much entirely SFW from what I can tell. Real users who want to roleplay as a sugar daddy don't generally spam random blogs with those messages; it's a waste of time. They spam other porn blogs run by young women, since those young women are more likely to be receptive to such messages. Like, the language "you’re pretty enough to be my sugar baby" just doesn't make sense when I don't think honoratacarnage has ever posted a photo of themselves (I checked their blog archive; there are no photos of them in the photos section). That, to me, heavily implies a bot or scammer who's fishing.

The real smoking gun would be to get a look at the kinds of porn basel-1995 was posting. Pornbots will post what is basically link spam: post after post after post of generic porn with links to cam sites or the like. Real users will sometimes reblog these --- sometimes the generic porn is just good --- but even then it's pretty easy to tell the difference between a bot and a real user from a cursory glance.[1] But, without that smoking gun, I don't think I can be 100% certain they're a bot.

Bot or not, I do think it's fair to call them a scammer. Scattershot "Pretty Babygirl, I Want To Be Your Sugar Daddy" is a common scam tactic: you ingratiate yourself with flattery and promises of money, get their bank details under the guise of needing it to wire over the money, and run off with as much as you can get. I've known people who fell for it, and scams like it. The difference between a scammer and bot is academic in this context; either way I don't think they should be on the vetted list.

But I don't run the list, I don't like how the list is promoted and organized even if I approved of the vetting process, and one of the vetters claims to have a contact in Gaza who can vouch for basel-1995. It's weird and messy. Without being able to audit their process myself, I'm not confident their vetting process actually works, and the whole thing is half moot for me since I believe I can do more good by just donating to aid organizations anyway.

If you do want to donate directly to a palestinian's crowdfunding campaign, I would suggest looking into Operation Olive Branch or Gaza Funds. I can't exactly vouch for either vetting process either, but it's a safe bet each has more resources to vet than random tumblr blogs do, and I'm not aware of any funds that are extremely likely to be scams on their lists.

Also, counter-intuitive as it may be, find a fund that is near completion to donate to.

1: This is actually an irritation of mine. People will get really upset about blank blogs following them, accusing them of being bots. Blank blogs aren't bots: the point of a bot is to generate links for people to click on and follow. They're there for SEO spam and brute forcing engagement through volume. A blank blog doesn't do that. The blank blogs are just lurkers, which is fine. Let them be while they get comfortable and they'll start posting and putting up a real bio/blog header when they feel like it.

[voraciousvore]

I would still check out your AO3 account if you started posting there, but tumblr is always where I go every Monday and Thursday (or the weekend if my week is super busy lol) to read your latest uploads! I write on tumblr and AO3 too, so I understand the low notes let down. It can be really disheartening, especially when other content gets so much interaction. But I always just kind of think of it like YouTube views. There’s tons of people who watch YouTube without liking a video, commenting on it, or even signing into their account to do either of those things anyway! But they still watch the videos and enjoy them, and maybe even come back each day of the week to watch more. That’s why there’s always way more views than likes and comments on videos. Tumblr is the same way. We just don’t see the view counter. As someone who lurked for a long time in the g/t community before I ever had a tumblr account, there might be lots of people reading your story who unfortunately don’t interact but they still enjoy it! Maybe their blog isn’t vore-related so they don’t feel like they can repost, or maybe they’re just starting to explore the interest and they aren’t sure about it yet. I know I avoided a lot of NSFW g/t and vore writing for a long time because I was mainly coming across stories that were one shots that were ONLY about that NSFW scene. I wasn’t really interested in reading that, so I’d skip. With Gianterra, I was already super invested in the story, so I kept reading when the NSFW scene with Bianca and the human men came up. Believe it or not, that whole scene made me think “oh my god, I might be into this” and I wouldn’t have known that without the very compelling and creative story to reel me in beforehand. I like the spicy scenes in your stories, but part of why I like them is because of the story itself too. That’s why I read the whole thing and enjoy it instead of just skipping around to find spicy scenes only. I know the characters more, rather than a one shot that’s just for kink. Long story short, I hope you don’t feel too discouraged. I wouldn’t be surprised if there were lots of readers and people who enjoy your stories who unfortunately just don’t interact to make notes. I wish more people would, but that’s unfortunately how it is. AO3 is good for seeing views, but I always imagine that there’s just as many views on tumblr too. Either way, wherever you decide to keep posting, I’ll be reading!

Thank you so much for the kind words anon! I needed to hear them today. 🥺 I am aware that people are less likely to interact with NSFW stuff even if they enjoy it (and I see all the secret side blogs lol). And I know that I shouldn't seek external validation. At the end of the day I write for the pleasure of it, and I just want to share that joy with others. I get discouraged at times but at the end of the day I'll never stop writing! And I'm starting to see the lurkers and invisible readers too. I will keep posting on here.

I'm also in agreement that I always love a good story with compelling characters! Oneshots can be amazing too but I think the build-up can make the scene so much more exciting and meaningful!

[dumbdomb]

👽 ☆ a short story about my encounter (fictional)

Read my pinned post BEFORE you interact: like, reblog, reply, dm, ask, or follow. Must be over twenty-five years of age to interact. 25+ only. You do not have my consent to "Like" this post without reading my pinned first. MDNI.

making a new alien believing friend and having a sleepover. after stargazing and getting excited about whatever latest info we share with each other, i suggest a silly alien themed makeover. we're both dressed in the sleaziest, futuristic clothes and our faces are covered in so much makeup!! at first, it's really funny, laughing so hard our mascara gets ruined. but then i'm just so fascinated with the idea of kissing your glossy, sparkly, irresistible mouth... i place my hands around you and pull you in close, barely even giving you a choice in the matter. you only have time to hold your breath, in shock, as my first kiss pulls away from your sticky lips. i blush and stare down at your mouth, obviously wanting more, but not saying a word. it's quiet... eerily quiet, like the kind of silence all those documentaries talk about. i begin to pull away, feeling embarrassed and like i just destroyed our friendship forever. "kiss me again" you say, except... i could've sworn you... didn't actually say anything. "...kiss me." i hear you, clear as can be, but i was looking at your mouth that time and your lips did not move at all... you grab my face and kiss me, passionately. and this time i'm trying to breathe through it, totally surprised. feeling confused and aroused, i relax and enjoy the way our lips keep sticking together with each kiss- undoubtedly smearing our makeup in the messiest way possible. you pause briefly before resuming our heavy makeout session, and your kiss feels different... like, your tongue had changed. i open my eyes and see a strange light around us, my vision somewhat blurry... i try to rub my eyes and suddenly realize i can't move. "what's happening?!" i ask, but my voice doesn't work. i could only think my question, but you had an answer anyway. "don't be afraid, i'm your friend. i want to help you..." and i'd never felt more safe or trusted anyone so completely before that very moment. that's when my room disappeared, and i knew i was somewhere else.

Read My Pinned BEFORE you interact! 25+ only. 🛸

NO: lurkers, likes only, inactive, empty, or blank blogs. DO NOT LIKE MY CONTENT. DNI. ♥️

[donnerpartyofone]

I'm on your Tumblr because we used to be mutuals, but I'm more of a lurker these days and I've remade several times under different handles and understand exasperation/hesitation at refollowing. I'm sincerely not trying to bait anything here, it's just that I've been depressed for the majority of 2024, and I think a really bad habit I've fallen into is not expressing gratitude to those who have a genuine impact on me. I'm sorry if this is uncanny and too parasocial. I have always admired how incredibly self-possessed and well-spoken/read/watched/cultured you are. I get an older sibling vibe from you that I never had growing up. You are one of the smarter people in the room for me. Sorry I'm sending this on anon, you don't have to publish it, in fact I hope you don't! I think you're one of the best blogs on this site and many things you have posted/blogged about have caused me to dig deeper within myself. In recent times, I appreciate that you force a situationally depressed individual (me) to challenge themselves for the better, if that makes sense. I'm sorry if this is disturbing!

[posted with permission] Man I have not been able to wake up all day for some reason and I owe some writing tomorrow, so this is actually a really helpful warmup exercise to try to get myself moving/thinking. I really appreciate this. I think your idea about expressing gratitude is really important and it's something I've been trying to do also, though maybe in a broader sense, like if I see a really inspiring movie (or whatever) I try to follow the impulse to write to the filmmaker and tell them. In my mind there's this invisible wall between creators and "fans" and that's usually fake; it's very likely that the people who made some of your favorite media are not rich, their futures are not secure, and they don't even necessarily know how their work has affected people. Worst case scenario they don't write you back, but only a snob would be actually bothered, and sometimes you even make a friend. I think the same principle can be applied to, you know, bloggers or whoever. Certainly I run this blog for myself first and foremost and I don't think I would or could stop even if absolutely no one was paying attention--it's a real compulsion and I think it's reasonably healthy to find ways to be in conversation with yourself--but it's valuable to know when you've been understood by anyone at all.

Not to make it weird but in Hebrews I think there's that verse, "If today you hear the voice of God, harden not your heart." That's really powerful outside the bounds of religion. To me it means, when you get that shred of energy or inspiration that says "I could do the dishes right now," do them immediately before you can talk yourself out of it! When you get that little spark that is so easily snuffed out by overthinking and taking that dangerous minute to round up excuses, that spark that you might be able to do the laundry, send the letter, watch the tough movie you're "never in the mood" for, pick up the book instead of watching TV, take a fucking walk, whatever it is: if you practice surrendering to these impulses immediately, almost without deciding, your life can really start to expand. Actually I believe it literally keeps your brain alive, to keep making it process new information, even if it seems trivial or you don't fully feel like it. But anyway a lot of us don't follow the impulse to say to someone "Hey, I think you're doing a good job" because it's so easy to imagine lots of different reasons they won't like it. But honestly that's unlikely (as long as you're not demanding something in return), and if someone responds poorly to that then chances are they're kind of an asshole.

(I mean sometimes I fail to respond to a message or an obvious social cue but it's usually because I just get overwhelmed by other parts of life and/or I'm not extremely skilled in forming and maintaining connections in any normal way. But it's rare that somebody has tried to reach out to me and I was like secretly hating them for it.)

Depression is really hard to talk about--I mean it's easy to VENT about, but it can be hard to converse about. There's that (American?) thing where you feel like no one should say anything that isn't *CEO voice* solution-oriented, and that's when people either avoid the topic entirely or react with all kinds of unwelcome and/or irrational advice. I have the illusion of being all full of wisdom on this because I've been severely depressed since I was really little and obviously there's something wrong with my whole operating system, but one of my best friends--who is not naturally depressive--is in such a bad way and it's not her fault and possibly there is no way out for real, and of course I have the urge to pump her up and keep her afloat, but if I'm too positive it will be totally dishonest. I have to split the difference between cheering her up and like, not lying to her. I'd be a total hypocrite if I denied her the understanding and acknowledgement of darkness that I myself always want and rarely get. It's hard, but on the individual basis it's useful to try to map the nature of your own depression and notice how it operates; just observe and take notes even if you can't see a way to control it right now. It sounds like you're doing some of that, there is a lot of dignity in that activity.

These are my thoughts off the cuff, with any luck they provoke something useful. Now I feel like I'm finally ready to shower and have ill-advised beverages and do my stupid homework assignment. Thank you for your thoughts, and the helpful prompt, and I hope you have a good day and/or night, for real.

[specialgradefckr]

Heyyo! I'm usually just a lurker, but your Heatwave series has been absolutely incredible and I had to write in. I'm not usually an ABO fan, but you are rapidly changing my mind. Started with the Yuuta/Rika piece and loved your characterization of that sad eyed dude. Sweet and mostly passive while also being fully aware of reader-chan's BS.

Day 4 tho??? 🥵🔥🥵 I'm a more recent Gojo convert and oh my stars, "...you think for a moment he sounds like a dog toy. You think you want to make him your dog toy." Arrogant, but also whiney and pathetic Gojo really hits for me. The Pining? Phenomenal.

Just wanted to gas you up a bit and let you know what an excellent writer you are. Totally looking forward to the rest of the Heatwave series and whatever else your big brain cooks up in the future! 😊

wanted to gas you up a bit

awwhhhhHHh THANK YOUUUU 🥺 i super appreciate it!!!

honestly i started this blog recently and i've been trying not to compare the numbers but sometimes i get discouraged, you know? like, i AM doing it for the art (i knew day 3 was not gonna get a lot of love) but i'm posting it bc it makes me happy to see people enjoying it.

it's super encouraging to hear from you (and all the others who leave comments or reblog etc.) that my work is doing well.

i'm trying to be more critical of my own writing, fix things i don't like about it, and sometimes i need a reminder that it's still worthwhile and enjoyable to read even when i feel like it could have been better.

I've been writing like? All 10 of the Heatwave prompts concurrently, and while it means I have all of them drafted and partly written rn, it also means I switch between them a lot.

Inevitably I start to kinda. Lose the plot sometimes of a scene I'm trying to write skdfhglsdhg like the intro to the Yuta fic was SOOOO long actually and it was rambling about social phenomena with alphas, basically the omegaverse version of red pill dudes LMAOOO

and that was also supposed to lead in to like. the idea of what a REAL alpha is. the non-gendered values of leadership, protectiveness, and actually being sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of people around them (a crucial trait for someone in a leadership position).

and yuta fits those things SO WELL. he is CONSTANTLY worried about the people around them, how they feel and what they think. he admires the shit out of his classmates who like, tried to attack him when they first met fghskjdfgh. he wants to protect them but he never looks down on them.

later in the manga we see that yuta's consideration and empathy isn't just for his classmates. he cares a lot even for people who are very capable of protecting themselves - he cares about their feelings.

so i just knew like. yuta and tsundere reader. yuta who can see though your fussiness because he's always been perceptive.

yuta who thinks you're hot bc he has a constant boner for strong women but also has a deep yearning to see you be honest and vulnerable with him, and goes feral for it.

yuta who you can be vulnerable with because you know him and his gentle smile, his kind words, how he looks up to you even though he's a special grade and stronger than you'll ever be,, hhhh....

but yeah anyways. *grasps you and shakes you by the shoulder* GOJO. GOJO SATORU BEING HIS PATHETIC NEEDY SELF. GOJO BEING YOUR SQUEAKY TOY AND LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT -

tmi but "fuck me until i sound like a dog toy" is actually something a previous partner said to me??? i've never been much of a top but hearing that just kinda had me... hsdfgjhdsg HHHHHH

i think a major part of gojo's appeal is how he can be arrogant and pretty AND sultry all at once. there's something utterly delicious about a slutty confident man who is also crying screaming throwing up for you to let him put it in you skdhflsdhg

next heatwave fic is sdkfgsdlhgshg uhhhHHhh different from the ones you have read, it's a yandere piece with gojo and geto.

After that it's another gojo piece i think you'll REALLY like >.> masochist!gojo is a favorite headcanon of mine and i was actually super hyped writing some of the smut there so far hehe.

glad you've enjoyed so far! more to come for sure ;)