#anyways I love titch so much

[youling-the-ghost]

Titch my beloved <3 (ft. Derek)

[i-may-be-an-emu]

I forgot to post this on tumblr too so here’s a ditch edit I made the other day :D

mild warning for bright colours/light

Audio credit: “Cassiopeia” by bears in trees

Video credit: @shootimpro (Improvised Play #30 - The Unrelenting Aubergine)

(Btw the empty sfth blog is because someone got the url and is saving it for if sfth ever want to join tumblr)

[sinking-in-a-gentle-pool-of-wine]

Hii!! I love your writing so, so much-- it's soo good!! I'm not sure if you're taking requests, but I'll send it anyway :)

What about something where Sebastian and Ominis are fighting, and the reader tries to intervene, but Sebastian just starts fighting with her as well? So she goes on a mission (they were supposed to go together) alone? And he's looking for her and asks Ominis, and he tells him that she's in the hospital wing. And he goes to her and he apologizes?

Thank you so much, and if you don't like the idea, and you don't want to write it, it's perfectly fine!

HELLO. I’VE DONE IT. I… may have gone a titch overboard—I got really invested. Thank you sm for your request. Here it is (if you wanna see a nicer formatted one (italics, etc.) check out my Wattpad it’s on there too!):

Keep Me Honest // Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Angst/Action?/Fluff

Word count: 4k+

(All characters aged to 18+ (really just ‘cause, there’s nothing in here that requires it))

———————————————

“I don’t care that no one got hurt!” Ominis shouts. “You broke your promise, Sebastian.”

You stop in your tracks. You’ve just descended into the Undercroft, ready to meet with Sebastian for a practice session, when you overhear the stirrings of an argument between the two boys you know best. You quickly duck into the shadows, not wishing to interrupt. It wasn't clear to you yet which of their arguments this one was: would it rise to a head and resolve, or would one of them storm off in the heat of the moment and drag the conflict on? You could never tell with these two; both had quite the flair for the dramatic.

“Look,” you hear Sebastian start tersely. “You and I agree that Anne should be able to protect herself. How is this any different?”

“Do you think I woke up yesterday?” Ominis jabs back. “Protecting oneself does not require Unforgivable Curses!”

“Sometimes crucio is all that a goblin will listen to. Anyway, it's already been done, Ominis. What do you expect me to do about it now?”

You knew Anne had been trying to get back on the saddle in terms of spell practice, but you had no idea what all Sebastian had been teaching her during his visits to Feldcroft. You weren't sure how you felt about it, but if Anne had asked him, you supposed it was all right... Ominis did have a tendency to shy away from knowledge that posed any similarity to dark magic. But all the same...

“Promise me that you will never teach Anne another spell that puts her morality in danger. That puts yours in danger, too,” Ominis says.

“I can promise you that I'll not tell you the next time I teach Anne a spell.”

“That's not how we've ever worked, Sebastian, and you know it.”

That was it. Before you know it, you're striding into the torch light to provide some back up. Ominis was right: the three of them had been a team since as long as you had known them. Cutting Ominis out was not the answer; you knew Anne wouldn't stand for it either. As you round the corner, you finally see the scene of the argument.

Ominis was standing ramrod straight, clenching and unclenching his fists, bright red nail marks in his palms. Meanwhile, Sebastian looked erratic as ever, his hair sticking out at all ends from messing with it too much, and his wand held loosely in his hand as he paced back and forth, casting shadows on the wall behind him. When he turns for his next loop, he sees you and halts, his hand tightening on the wand and his eyes wide.

“What are you doing here?” he demands.

Your mouth hangs open, unspeaking, for a few seconds. You don't know what you had expected him to say, but it wasn't that.

“Y/N?” Ominis asks, unmoving.

“Yes, it's me,” you respond. “I got here a few moments ago and... overheard you two arguing.”

Ominis lightly kicks at the ground, agitated.

“Well, if you're here to intervene, don't bother,” he says. “I don't want to hear it. I'm tired of you two galavanting off to who-knows-where to put yourselves in danger despite my warnings, and I'm even more tired of you coming to Sebastian's defense no matter the transgression.”

“Actually, I... wanted to second your wish, Ominis.”

Ominis's jaw drops slightly; he clearly hadn't been expecting your support. Sebastian, on the other hand, looks mutinous.

“Seb,” you start, “I know you want Anne to be safe--we all do!--but going behind our backs isn't the way to do it. Particularly Ominis's.”

“When he refuses to be reasonable,” Sebastian starts, shaking his head, “what choice do I have?”

“Did Anne come to you with the wish to learn Crucio, though?” you push.

“Why does it matter whose idea it was? She seemed happy to learn it!”

“You know she does all she can to please you,” Ominis cuts in.

“So what?” Sebastian responds. “You think I manipulated her--accidentally? How is that even possible?”

“No one's saying you manipulated Anne, Seb—”

“Stop calling me 'Seb'!”

This time, you really weren't expecting him to say that. Your face flushes, and you take a step back. Perhaps you had misread this situation--this friendship, you think. You thought you and Sebastian had grown infinitely closer this last year... that he wanted to tell you everything the same way you did him. That fluttery feeling you'd gotten every time you received a piece of exciting news lately because it meant you'd get to tell Sebastian--it feels empty and silly now. How could you have not noticed until now?--that this feeling hadn't been reciprocated.

You take a deep breath, watching Sebastian white-knuckle the wand in his hand. Willow wood.

“I'm not one of you guys,” you start. “I know that. But Ominis is your family as much as Anne. You owe it to him to be honest.”

You see Ominis's face soften in understanding, his mouth still set in a grim frown. Sebastian, however, tenses his jaw and finally looks at you.

“You're right,” he says. “You're not one of us. So stop butting in where you're not wanted.”

“Fine! I won't,” you say, turning on your heel and all but stomping out of the Undercroft, throwing the door open and not bothering to shut it behind you.

“‘Fine, I won't?’” you mutter to yourself. “Couldn't have thought of something with a bit more finality?”

You feel hot pricks behind the backs of your eyes, and you shove the heels of your palms against your eyelids, shoving the tears back. You wouldn't cry. Not for this. Not when you still had work to do. You'd almost forgotten in the heat of the discussion that this particular training session was only the prelude to another task of yours and Sebastian's.

One thing Ominis had gotten right was the fact that the two of you did often get up to a bit more trouble than you’d bargained for. That being said, the trouble would come no matter what the two of you did, so you figured it was best to go it together, at the end of the day. Now you could hardly imagine back to only a few months ago, when exploring on your own was the norm. You supposed that was about where you were now, though. You could reach out to someone else, but you thought the solitude might do you some good. Perhaps it was time to retrain your independent side.

It wasn't really all that dangerous, anyway. All you had to do was take out a bandit camp, a bit northeast of the Forbidden Forest, that had been causing some trouble for residents of the Hogsmeade Valley. You had hoped that tonight could be the night you introduced Sebastian to Merlin trials, though that didn't appear to be possible anymore.

You run the rest of the way through the hallway and through the main doors into the crisp fall air. You inhale deeply, the smell of damp leaves, dirt, and fresh grass comforting to you. Looking around you once to make sure no prefects were outside to see you, you summon your broom to you and mount it, before bursting off the ground and into the sky. You've come to know Hogwarts enough to not need a recalibrating pause in order to know where you were going--North, South, to the Forbidden Forest, or Hogsmeade, or Feldcroft...

You shake your head, willing the glum thoughts away, and squint to see better in the actively darkening sky. The most recent modifications that Albie Weekes made to your broom are nice, and you feel yourself cutting through the air more cleanly than you ever have. Already, the Forbidden Forest looms up on your left, and you bank right and begin to slow down, searching the ground below. A calm, clear stream runs lazily through the grasses, and you see a figure on its bank. You slow to a stop, watching from a distance still, and the figure stands up from the water and begins to walk back into a patch of trees.

That's gotta be it, you think. You fly closer to the ground but remain on your broom, drifting slowly and steadily through some of the taller grasses to stay as hidden as possible. You see a warm orange glow through the branches of the crop of trees and hear voices on the other side of the thicket. You pull your wand out and are about to dismount, when a blast knocks you off your boom.

The broom is ripped out of your hand, but you keep your wand grip tight as you catch air. Praying that you'll fall in grass or the water or anywhere but a jagged rock, you pull your knees up and make yourself into a ball just before crashing onto the ground. Cold water floods your senses, and you feel your robes instantly soak. You stand up as quickly as you can, slipping in the mud and adjusting your hat so you can see. What you see in front of you makes your blood run colder than the water streaming below you.

Bandits. At least a dozen of them, and a few more apparate into the group as you watch. One of them must have seen you coming, and their spell drew the rest.

“Damnit!” you swear under your breath, and a masked bandit near the front of the group laughs.

“You thought you could sneak up on us all alone, little girl?”

Little girl? You seethe.

“It's not like I haven't singlehandedly taken out camps of your bandits before.”

“Bold words for someone who's just been dismounted.”

“I prefer fighting on the ground, anyway.”

“Is that so?”

With a slight flick of his wrist, the bandit shoots a basic cast at you, and you barely throw up a protego in time to deflect it. You try to follow up with a stunning blast, but the bandit easily deflects it. Taking this as their cue to start engaging, the rest of the bandits begin hurling curses and fire in your direction. You can't get a spell in edgewise. You fumble in your bag for a mandrake and whip it in their direction, wincing against the muffled sound of its cries. Though they've scattered slightly, slowly trying to form what you fear is a circle around you, most of the bandits are affected by its screams, hunching down to cover their ears with as much fabric of their cloaks as possible.

“Bombarda!” you yell, aiming at the largest group of bandits you see. The spell lands cleanly, and dirt and rocks explode, sending the bandits stumbling and falling over themselves. You then disarm two of the bandits closest to you before summoning your broom. You don't want to flee, but you need to get away from the trap you've tripped and restart your approach somehow. As your broom, slightly splintery but still very much intact, flies to you, you spot another bandit mounting their own broom. You throw your leg over the wood and leap off the ground as quickly as you can, kicking a bandit in the face as you do so.

You hear them swear colorfully as you accelerate in a random direction. You refuse to flee back to Hogwarts, but you don’t know where to go that’s safe. You look over your shoulder to see not one, but three bandits flying into a V-formation behind you. The odds of losing all three of them were quickly dwindling, and you could feel now that your robes were slowing you down. The cold air was biting your hands as they gripped your broom, and the fabric sagging off your frame threatened to harden with frost.

Swearing, you shoot down into the trees of the Forbidden Forest, dipping below the canopy line but staying well above the ground. You don’t want to lose the bandits just to find yourself face-to-face with a troll. You can hear the whistle of the wind behind you, signaling the presence of the three following you. As you zig-zag around trees, you think you can hear them panting--with effort or with thrill for the chase? You hope for the former.

You then hear a SMACK! followed by a string of yelling. One bandit down, you think, but don’t dare to look back and confirm. And the end of the tree line is already in sight... so close to the castle.

“Diffindo!”

As you break through the treeline, you feel a slash of pain on your back, crying out as you feel the skin tear as if under the crack of a whip. Your grip on your broom loosens involuntarily, and your vision blurs with tears, even as you see the lights of the castle up ahead. You will your broom to go faster, faster, almost there, you bank on the hope that a prefect or professor or someone will be out on the grounds when you arrive, otherwise there's no stopping the bandits from finishing you off in the front gardens.

You look over your shoulder to see just that one bandit--the other got left behind, you suppose--but he's wearing a wicked grin. As you both rise over the outermost wall of the castle, the bandit is stopped by an invisible barrier, but you hear him throw out one last spell before you make it through the first gate:

“Depulso!” he shouts, and you are thrown from your broom, blown forward and unable to hold on tight enough. Your back, still bleeding, sears in pain from the pressure of the spell, and you tumble through the air, hearing the laughter of the bandit behind you. You can't find the strength in your limbs to form into a protective ball again, and as the ground looms up beneath you, all you can do is shut your eyes.

————————————————————

“Where is she?”

Ominis sighs.

“She wouldn’t be in the Slytherin common room, now would she, Sebastian?”

“How do you know who I’m talking about? I could be asking about a Slytherin,” Sebastian protests.

“Who else would you be talking about?” Ominis retorts.

Sebastian clears his throat.

“Well?”

“And why are you looking for her at this hour?” Ominis asks.

“Ominis, it’s 2 o’clock in the afternoon. And… we were supposed to go on a mission together last night, but—”

“But you broke her heart and sent her into certain danger by herself?”

“Merlin, Ominis, when you put it like that—”

“That is what happened, Sebastian.” Ominis sets down the scroll he was fidgeting with. “You’re lucky I didn’t run off into danger, myself. I must admit, you made it tempting, but thankfully I’m a bit more level-headed than our Ravenclaw friend.”

Sebastian runs a hand through his hair; his wand feels slippery in his palm.

“You don’t think she actually went off without me, do you?”

Ominis can’t hold back a snort at this.

“What do you think?”

————————————————————

Your body has never felt more stiff.

You wake up with a crick in your neck and soon discover it’s from sleeping at an odd angle due to the rough bandages spanning the length of your back. A bitter taste sits at the back of your throat, and your head is throbbing. You feel for a moment that you may be sick, but a few deep breaths through your mouth settle you.

A slow scan of the room lets you know that you’re in the hospital wing. Huh, you think, not remembering being brought here. What was the last thing you remember?

A flash of red, dirt, blood, the cobblestone rising up to meet you—

You wince, turning to see a glass of water on the table next to you. You start to reach over to grab it, and it’s only then that you realize your arm is in a sling. Your wand arm.

“Shit.”

“Miss Y/L/N!” you hear the nurse from behind you, and sure enough, she walks up to you, a frown on her face. “You will not use that language in my hospital wing.”

“I’m sorry. But could you please help me with that glass of water?” you ask, holding out your other hand. “I can’t reach it.”

You feel pathetic—unable to finish a mission on your own, unable to heal yourself, unable to lift a glass of water for Merlin’s sake. Hot tears threaten to show themselves again, and you bite your bottom lip—hard—to stave them off.

She passes the glass to you, and you raise it to your mouth. It’s still cold, and you feel it fill your stomach and ease your nausea. You close your eyes and take a deep breath.

“Thank you,” you say.

“Mhm. Now, I’m not going to ask you how you came to be rushed into my wing, all battered and bruised, with a broken broom, no less—and at the ripe hour of three in the morning!—but I am going to tell you to not do it again. You’ll take a bit to recover; some injuries can’t be undone with the flourish of a wand, you know. You’d do well to remember that.”

Throughout her speech, you felt your face growing hot, and you didn’t know if it was from indignation or embarrassment. You hold your tongue, though, and watch as she flounces away, off to get some Wiggenweld potion, or patronize some more students, or what have you.

Now you were left with nothing but your thoughts… and the almost empty glass of water. What had gone wrong? You couldn’t believe how quickly the previous evening had turned to disaster. You typically kept such a cool head during combat—and allowing a bandit to sneak up on you was unheard of. You know Professor Fig would reassure you that the fact that it had only happened once was an accomplishment, but you expect a level of performance from yourself that exceeds simple assurances. Had going without Sebastian truly thrown you that off your game?

Frustration—at Sebastian or at yourself, you didn’t know—bubbles up inside you, and you wish you could just stand up and walk out of there. You hate being stuck—feeling stuck. Your relationship with Sebastian hadn’t felt stuck at all until last night. Sebastian helped you feel free, capable, clever, brave even. Were you not those things without him? Or did he just help you unlock those parts of yourself? You know it’s the latter, but you still wish you could continue to share those moments with him.

Despite the argument in the Undercroft, you find yourself wishing you could see Sebastian—just try to make him hear you out one more time. And if he really never wants to see you again, then that’s fine. The last year of friendship could mean nothing to him, if that’s what he decides, but you know you would fight.

As you’re steeling yourself to wait it out and perhaps imagining hypothetical scenarios in your head, you hear that very same Slytherin’s voice from outside the wing.

“Let me in, Peeves.”

Your skin starts tingling, and your heart racing. You really didn’t think the time to talk would come so soon. You gulp and look around; none of the other students seem to be paying much mind to the ruckus on the other side of the door.

You hear Peeves blow a raspberry.

“What’s the password?”

“Eat my shorts.”

“Nope! Not even close. Man, you Slytherins really aren’t that clever, are you?”

“Peeves, I’ll curse you if you don’t get out of my way.”

“Oh yeah, and why do you need to get in there so badly? A certain Ravenclaw need your attention?”

Your eyes go wide; you look around frantically and see that some of the students have started to pay attention to the ongoing debate.

“I bet she could guess the password,” Peeves continues.

“Peeves, I swear, I will sic the Bloody Baron on you,” Sebastian responds.

“Ha! Like you have any pull with him.”

The conversation goes quiet, but you hear muffled speaking—Sebastian’s voice. The other students in bed are indiscreetly leaning towards the door as well, trying to catch a phrase or two, when suddenly it bangs open. Sebastian stands in the doorway, looking a mess: his hair is in his eyes, and his robes are askew. His left shoe is even untied. He takes in the room, squinting his eyes when he notices his eavesdroppers, finally landing on you. His whole face changes, the lines disappearing and his eyes brightening, as he strides to your bed and grasps your hand in his.

“Thank Merlin you’re all right. I was afraid I wouldn’t find you in one piece.”

“What?” you start, indignant despite yourself. “You think I couldn’t handle going out alone?”

His eyes harden slightly, and he lets go of your hand.

“What? No, I just heard from Ominis—after much prying, might I add—that you had been rushed to the hospital wing in the small hours of the morning.”

“Oh,” you respond weakly. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

“So I was worried,” he says flatly.

You could cry—he had come in exactly how you pictured he would if you could have your way. And then you ruined it.

You sighed.

“But I could go, if you’d prefer,” Sebastian starts.

“No!” you gasp, grabbing his hand back. “No. Please. I’m—I am… embarrassingly happy to see you.”

He smiles, his eyes softening again. You were vaguely aware of the eyes and ears on you both—here in the middle of the hospital wing—but you didn’t care. Not with Sebastian here, looking at you like that.

“So—” you start.

“Listen—” he starts at the same time.

You both laugh.

“You first,” he says. “You first, please.”

You swallow dryly.

“You, um… I—” you take a deep breath. “I wanted to apologize, for being reckless last night, and for crossing a line or not respecting a boundary of our relationship, I just…”

You pause, but the earnest, open look Sebastian is giving you propels you forward before you can stop it.

“I just want to tell you everything, always. I want to share just about every experience with you. And if that’s weird, that’s weird, and I’ll stop trying to do that, and… And I’ll certainly not expect that of you… but… Well I know what you said last night, actually, so I’ll assume that’s not wanted, either, so. Actually… yeah.”

While you were stumbling through whatever that confession was, Sebastian’s face was taking on an expression you hadn’t seen before. You weren’t sure if it was melancholy or joy, or trepidation. When it’s clear that you’ve said your last filler word in an effort to prolong his response time, he grins.

“Please, never listen to a word I say ever again,” he says, releasing your hand to cup your face in his hands. “You are the best person—the best thing to happen to me.”

You feel the lines in your face release, and you reach up to hold his wrist.

“You keep me honest,” he continues, “and I think I sometimes hate that. But I’ll work on it—I am working on it. I lashed out last night, and that’s not okay. I’d maybe hope that if we get into an argument again, you won’t go and get yourself diffindo-ed, of course…”

“Yeah yeah,” you laugh, rolling your eyes.

“Really, though. I mean it. Because I’ll be with you next time. And the time after that. And the next one…”

“But then we’re done,” you interject.

“Yeah, all right,” he laughs, lightly punching your shoulder.

“OW!” you yell, gaining back the attention of those in the room who had finally diverted it.

Panic immediately sets in on Sebastian’s face, and he’s about to fall over in his haste to get the nurse, when you start laughing.

“Merlin, Seb,” you say. “Learn to take a joke.”

“I’ll kill you first,” he says, smirking.

“You got any classes today?” you ask.

“Not ‘till Astronomy this evening.”

You scoot over on the bed and pat the space beside you, the question on your face. Sebastian pretends to look around for the nurse in secrecy before gently climbing in beside you. Both of you feel the release of relief settle over you, and you let your head drop onto his shoulder.

“What was it you said to Peeves that convinced him to let you in, anyway?”

[weemssapphic]

Hello! I'm in a bit of a ✨️Mood✨️ and was wondering if I might request an insecure reader, with Brienne to reassure them? Just a titch of angst with loads of (romantic) fluff? 🤗

I Wanna Get Better

A/N: Hello, darling! With how long ago this request was placed I am certain the ✨️Mood✨️ has passed, but also one can never go wrong with Brienne being a soft, loving girlfriend. I hope this turned out alright 💗 (the title is literally just because I was listening to Bleachers as I wrote this and it semi fit, I just could not think of anything lol)

Words: ~1.3k | ao3 link in title

Content/warnings: insecure!reader, body image issues, hurt/comfort, fluff

Standing in front of the mirror, your eyes trailed over your body, stopping on every single flaw, every little imperfection. You could feel it happening - could feel yourself starting to spiral as the thoughts in your head became louder and louder, drowning out the world around you. Everything you hated about yourself was amplified in the first rays of dawn, in the silence of your little bedroom. You hadn’t even meant to look in the mirror, you’d simply woken up early and gotten up to get some water - yet here you were.

The feeling of strong arms wrapping around your torso from behind ripped you momentarily out of your thoughts, and your eyes snapped up to meet Brienne’s sparkling pools of sapphire in the mirror.

Your eyes traveled over her form, or what you could see of it as it was partially hidden behind you - her chiseled face, pale lips pulled up into a sleepy smile; her golden curls, soft and messy after a night’s sleep; her broad shoulders and muscular arms, dotted with the cutest little freckles; her large hands, long, slender fingers splayed out across your bare abdomen. 

Brienne was just so… perfect. So beautiful. So confident - at least outwardly. Of course she had her own issues with her appearance, you knew that. But she seemed able to take them in stride somehow, seemed to be able to focus on other things, while you felt yourself drowning.

“You weren’t in bed… What are you doing?” Brienne’s eyebrows furrowed in concern at the somber expression on your face, lips parted gently as she held your gaze.

You dropped your eyes to the floor and attempted to untangle yourself from your girlfriend.

“Nothing,” you mumbled, eyes still cast downwards as you turned away from the mirror, crossing your arms self-consciously across your chest. “Just on my way to get some water.”

Of course, nothing went unnoticed by Brienne, whose gaze immediately dropped to your crossed arms and your slouched posture. You felt her fingers grip your chin and push your head up, ever so gently, so that you would meet her gaze.

“What’s going on?” Her eyes were filled with so much concern it nearly made you sick. You hated seeing her like this, and you hated being the cause for her worry - you hated yourself for it. Your stomach churned uncomfortably, your cheeks slowly turning pink as the familiar sting of tears pricked at your eyes, shame coursing through your veins.

Brienne stepped closer, her hand sliding from your chin to cup your cheek, her thumb wiping away a stray tear that had begun to fall. Nuzzling your face into her warm palm, your brain scrambled (unsuccessfully) to come up with an excuse for your sudden mood.

“I’m not good enough for you,” you whispered finally, so quietly that you hoped Brienne hadn’t heard you. Unfortunately for you, she had - she was always able to see right through you anyway - and the crease between her eyebrows deepened. 

Without saying a word, Brienne crouched slightly and - quite literally - swept you off your feet to carry you bridal style. You let out a yelp as she lifted you effortlessly into the air, and soon you were deposited carefully onto the bed. Brienne settled next to you, her face a mixture of concern and pure adoration as she opened her arms and pulled you into them. One hand splayed across your back to press your torso tightly to hers, while the other hand came to rest on your hip, fingers dancing across your skin in soothing patterns.

“What makes you think you’re not good enough for me?” she murmured softly into your hair, pressing her lips to the crown of your head. She let you tuck your head under her chin, knowing it was sometimes easier for you to talk about your feelings when you didn’t have to worry about making eye contact.

“Just look at me,” you whispered, unable to keep your voice from trembling. “I’m not special, I’m not pretty. I-I have stretch marks and my clothes don’t fit like they used to. And you’re so beautiful. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met and- and I don’t know why you would choose me.” The tears began to flow freely down your cheeks and you buried your head deeper into the crook of her neck.

You felt Brienne’s chest shake before you heard it - her deep chuckle. When you raised your head to get a look at her face, you saw nothing but admiration in those bright blue irises, in the gentle upward curve of her lips. Her eyebrow was slightly raised, and you felt your cheeks redden again.

“It’s very flattering that you think of me that way, my love,” she chuckled, her own cheeks a bit pink. “I used to think it was all a big joke to you. I have been insulted by so many people throughout my life, ridiculed for my appearance, stared at like some sort of beast. I believed I was the ugliest girl alive. Brienne the Beauty, they called me. You’re the first person who truly means it. And I believe you.”

Brienne removed her hand from your hip and traced a scar of her own on her abdomen. You watched, entranced, as her fingertips pulled at her skin, moving further down towards the light stretch marks littering her hips. “Do you think they make me less beautiful?”

You shook your head vigorously as you buried it further in Brienne’s neck. You could feel Brienne smile against the crown of your head, pulling you closer and reaching out for your hand to intertwine your fingers. Holding her hand managed to soothe you instantly, and you gave it a light squeeze. You sniffled.

“Why do you think yours make you less beautiful then?” Brienne’s voice was gentle and calm - you found yourself clinging to it, desperate to stay afloat. You shrugged, feeling a bit sheepish.

“You look badass… I just look ugly, I guess.”

Brienne let go of your hand to cup your cheek once more, this time with a little more force. She made sure you met her gaze before she spoke.

“You are the most beautiful woman to grace the Seven Kingdoms.”

Brienne’s eyes burned with sincerity and adoration, and there was a certain graveness to her expression that made your cheeks burn. She sealed her words with a kiss, pressing her lips to yours so tenderly that it left you breathless. Her lips began to trail reverently along your jaw, down your neck, across your collarbone - she pressed soft kisses all the way down your body, focusing on areas that she knew you were self-conscious about; your stomach, your hips, each and every stretch mark. You could feel Brienne’s love for you with every peck of her lips, and it somehow managed to make your heart a little lighter.

Her nose nuzzled against your bare skin - it tickled a little and had you giggling in spite of yourself. You could feel Brienne’s lips curl up into a smile as you laughed and her kisses turned sloppier, until you were shaking with laughter and gasping for air. 

When you finally looked down the length of your body, still fighting back giggles, Brienne was curled up at your hips, her chin resting on the swell of your stomach, looking adoringly up at you. Her eyes shone with affection and warmth, her cheeks were rosy, her hair mussed - the sight took your breath away.

“You are impossible, Brienne of Tarth. You know that?” You couldn’t help but mirror her smile as you beamed down at her.

“So you’ve told me,” she said with a grin, before crawling up next to you again and hovering over you to press a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “And you are beautiful, my love.”

“I love you, Brienne,” you said, a little breathlessly.

“I love you, too,” she replied, before mirroring your earlier actions and nuzzling her face into your neck.

x

taglist: @oceansblooming @alexusonfire @brienneswife @rosieathena @pro-weems-places @bigolgay @kimiinou @imprincipalweemspet @h-doodles

as always please let me know if you wanna be added to or removed from the taglist!

any and all comments will literally make my heart sing &lt;3 thank you for reading!

[marabout2772]

It's missing Ditch hour ✌🏽 !

Had the urge to draw their pretty faces hehe

(If you saw me upload, then delete, then re-upload this, no you haven't lol)

Is it me or Derek is kinda giving Disney princess vibes here ? Just look at him seriously 💅🏽

Ofc Titch has his usual resting bitch face ( AND FRECKLES, very important addition)

Close up of the babies ⬇️

Im so happy with how Titch came out, I think I'm starting to get a hold on how to draw his face ! (Finally !)

Also I don't know why, but I headcanon Derek to be from a sort of "old money" family. He cut ties with them because they were ✨assholes✨, and he's now living his best life in the country side (So much potential for family traumas :) )

Anyway, I don't know where that came from lol, bon appétit and love y'all !

Likes are cool, reblogs are cooler btw, it keeps tumblr alive !

[thenightshadowqueen]

Hi...If you don't mind, can I ask, who are your top 7 (or top 5) favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon) and your top 10 favorite characters ever from any media? Why do you love them all? Thanks if you want to answer....

Hi! Thank you so much for the ask! I love making lists, so I’m going to have a great time with this.

(Also I’m not sure if characters from Shoot from the Hip videos (improvised comedy group, if you haven’t heard of them) fall under the categories you laid out for the ships, but I decided to include them; I hope that’s all right! If you want me to redo the list without them, let me know.)

Ships

7. Bubbamiah (Bubba x Jeremiah, Inside the Mysterious Cube (Shoot from the Hip), canon)

They have such a wholesome relationship. They’re gay farmers (funny that SFTH has done that twice) from the southern US, and they’re just so genuinely happy together. Also their story is so gorgeous? I love that they fight side by side—Bubba got cube legs just to follow Jeremiah onto the battlefield, and I assume that was something he hadn’t really wanted to do (because he’d have done it sooner if he wanted to). But he did it anyway so that Jeremiah wouldn’t be alone. And then Jeremiah dies (in what is genuinely one of the most beautiful death scenes I’ve ever witnessed), and Bubba’s response is to get revenge, because he knows that’s what Jeremiah would want. And then Jeremiah comes back, and I’m so glad he does, because they deserve to go back to living their comfortable, peaceful lives on the farm.

6. Ditch (Derek x Titch, the Unrelenting Aubergine (Shoot from the Hip), canon)

Oh, look, the other gay farmers from a SFTH play. Who would have guessed? Okay, but seriously, these two are so fucking adorable. Derek is so helplessly in love. Honestly, despite the clear sexual intent of the title, they are so wholesome. Also: Titch, my beloved. He’s so scared of his own feelings, and Derek is perfect for him, too, because he knows when to give Titch space and when to push him to make a decision. They just have such a beautiful story.

5. Hornchurch (Andrews x Betruvia, the Phantom of Hornchurch (Shoot from the Hip), headcanon)

Look. Look. They have everything I look for in a couple. They remind me so much of Evervale, so it’s honestly no surprise I gravitated toward them. The thing is, no matter how much I love more wholesome ships, tragic and toxic ships have always been and will always be my favourite. And they definitely fall insert both categories. They’ve spent millennia reincarnating just to fight each other, and that, if you ask me, is very gay.

4. Esmerelda x the vampire slayer (the thirsty vampires sketch (Shoot from the Hip), canon)

Honestly I’m not even sure I can talk about them because I just want to scream. They had so much fucking chemistry, for a start, and I loved their characters individually. But together? I just. I just. Also, the fucking ending… I loved it before. But the ending just solidified it. Because, as previously stated, I love tragic or toxic ships. And so here we are. (Also is there a ship name for them? Because I need one.)

3. Castlelair (Alastair Lowe x Gavin Grieve, All of Us Villains and All of Our Demise by Amanda Foody and C. L. Herman, canon)

Okay so. So. Um. I’m unsure of how to express my love for them, because holy shit. This is enemies to lovers done right. I remember reading the first book and thinking that they had chemistry, but I didn’t think anything would come of it, because Alastair was with Isobel. And then I read the second book, and I screamed. They’re so perfect? I have so many annotations just screaming incoherently about them (honestly calling them annotations is a bit of a stretch). I love how they’re opposites of each other from the beginning, and yet so fucking similar deep down. Also, I love how obsessed Gavin was with him from the beginning, especially when compared to the fact that Alastair literally never bothered to learn his name at the beginning. Also (and this is probably bad), I love it when my ships torture someone else together. I don’t know what it is, but something about it compels me like nothing else (again, in FICTION). So that is quite the bonus for them. I could genuinely write a whole wall of text about them (albeit not a very coherent one), but I’ll leave it for now.

2. Evervale (Eli Ever x Victor Vale, Vicious and Vengeful by V. E. Schwab, headcanon)

Evervale is kind of what I look for when I’m looking for ships. They have so much history, which is probably the thing I love the most in ships. I wrote two posts a bit ago about all of the things I love about them, so I think this bit will probably just be a shorter version of that, but here goes. They are the only people who have ever understood each other, and they are the only people who ever will. They mean so much to each other, even ten years after everything went down. And even though they hate each other, they still care so much about what the other one thinks. They’re so fundamentally similar but different in such key ways, and I love them so much, and I think I’m going to cut myself off here, because I already did two posts about this.

1. Merthur (Arthur Pendragon x Merlin, BBC Merlin, headcanon)

It was never going to be anyone else. They’re a classic, and there’s a reason for that. The tragedy of it is a big part of what draws me to it—Merlin is left wandering the world, alone, forever, without his other half. But there’s also—and I think I made a post about this, too—the element of unbalanced dedication. Merlin loves Arthur so deeply that he rewrites his entire moral code, crosses all of his lines (“Who says my destiny has to include murder?”), literally gives his entire life trying to keep Arthur safe. And Arthur has no idea. And that, more than anything else, is the thing that makes this ship for me. (I told you I liked the darker relationship dynamics.) Obviously, there are also a million other reasons why I ship them—the way they talk to each other, the fucking looks—but I think that the the reason I love them as much as I do comes down to the dedication and the tragedy.

Characters

10. June (Vengeful by V. E. Schwab)

I’m genuinely so intrigued by her. I don’t have that much to say about her, to be honest, because we don’t have a lot of information on her, but I just really like her. She’s so interesting, and I really want to learn more about her; I hope we get more of her backstory in Victorious.

9. Merlin (BBC Merlin)

Honestly, he goes through so much. He deserved so much better, but truthfully, his pain is part of why I love him so much. The thing is, I don’t often find myself liking main characters, because I fine “good people” to be irritating (in fiction, obviously). But Merlin intrigues me, because he starts with such a strong moral code, but he ends up sacrificing all of that for Arthur’s sake. And that? That kind of character progression fascinates me.

8. Juliet Caesar (Caesar and Juliet (Shoot from the Hip))

I love murderous women, okay? She’s insane, and I love her for it. Her line about women getting corrupted by power just like men was iconic. Also, I’m just so interested as to her character development. Because of the time-skip, we go from her being fourteen and a pretty innocent, sweet girl—albeit with a definite hint of desire for power—to her fifteen years later, as a full-grown woman, murdering people and running the entire country. And I just really want to see those fifteen years. (Obviously they didn’t have time in the play; this isn’t a criticism of that.) But yeah, she really interests me.

7. Arthur Pendragon (BBC Merlin)

The first time I saw Arthur Pendragon on a screen, I was twelve years old, and he was a dick. And the first words out of my mouth were, “He’s going to be my favourite.” And he hasn’t let me down. Arthur is a flawed character—which I actually really appreciate, especially since a lot of Arthurian stories portray him as the pinnacle of chivalry—but he has a good heart and a lot of trauma. And I think he’s such a fascinating character, especially looking at the way his dad fucked him up. He made a lot of mistakes through the course of show, but he’s always genuinely trying to do what’s best for his people.

6. The vampire slayer (the thirsty vampires sketch (Shoot from the Hip))

She deserves a name. (I’ve seen a few fanon ones floating around, but I wasn’t sure which one to use.) She’s amazing. She’s so clever, with the way she infiltrated Ybbob and Esmeralda’s home, and with her seduction of Esmeralda. Also, I’m very much here for her very open interest in both of the vampires. (You could argue that that was for show, but I like to think that that’s just what she told herself, and it was actually fuelled by genuine desire. But that’s just a headcanon.) (Also Sam played her really hot—)

5. Gwaine (BBC Merlin)

Okay so. First, to get the obvious out of the way: who the fuck let him look like that? He’s both pretty and hot, and that shouldn’t be allowed. For the record, that is not the only reason I like him. Honestly, the main reason I like him is because he’s a sassy little shit, and that’s my favourite character archetype. He has absolutely no regard for status, and he has chemistry with fucking everybody, and he’s honestly just a queer icon. (Out of the MANY queer-coded characters in BBC Merlin, he is one of the few I genuinely physically cannot picture being straight.)

4. Gavin Grieve (All of Us Villains and All of Our Demise by Amanda Foody and C. L. Herman)

Gavin. Gavin. I think the reason I adore him so much—or, at least, the biggest reason, because I have a lot—is because of just how far he’s willing to go. That’s what I look for in a character. He knows what he wants—to survive—and he will do anything to get it. He mutilates himself. He kidnaps someone. He tortured two separate men. He will do anything, and I admire that. He took his fucked-up family and childhood, and he decided that he was going to prove them all wrong. And he did, and I’m so proud of him.

3. Victor Vale (Vicious and Vengeful by V. E. Schwab)

There are very few characters I relate to as deeply as I relate to Victor Vale. (Which, knowing the things he’s done, is quite concerning, actually.) The way he talks about something being “missing” from himself, more after he became an EO but before that, too, but not feeling like that’s necessarily a bad thing, is both fascinating and deeply relatable. Also, there’s one scene that has stuck with me since I first read it: Victor in the hotel the night they rescue Sydney, feeling that bone-deep restlessness. That is the first and only time I’ve ever seen that feeling—which I also experience (it genuinely feels like torture)—adequately described. I love Victor for a lot of reasons; he’s pragmatic, and he’s quite ambivalent about morals, and he’s totally obsessed with and locked in on Eli. But every reason I give just comes back to how much I see myself in him.

2. Alastair Lowe (All of Us Villains and All of Our Demise by Amanda Foody and C. L. Herman)

Alastair Lowe is my baby. Honestly, his family fucked him up so badly, even worse than the other families—and that’s saying something. His obsession with being a villain is beautiful, and I really love seeing how his relationship to villainy and being a monster evolves through the books. He starts out so sure of himself, and then, after Hendry’s death, he’s so unsure, and then he decides that he wants to become a better person. And then, when Hendry comes back, he backslides so gorgeously. Honestly, he is one of the best characters I’ve ever read. He’s so angry, and he’s so sad, and he’s so hurt, and he doesn’t even know it.

1. Morgana Pendragon (BBC Merlin)

I said that I love insane women, and I meant it. I love insane women. Honestly, her character arc was so beautiful. (It could have been better executed, but overall, I still really liked it.) She was my favourite character from the first episode, and that has not changed since I was twelve years old. Good Morgana is my favourite. So is evil Morgana. (Also, this isn’t why I love her, but why the fuck is she allowed to be that gorgeous? It is deeply unfair to me as a queer person.) I genuinely don’t know what to say, because I don’t think I can offer any kind of intelligent insight into why I love her. I just love her.

[originallandlockedmariner]

“The strength of any relationship is dependent upon communication. But more importantly, understanding. I can listen to you communicate, but did I understand what I heard? Did I hear the intention?”

Intimate Relations/Family/Types of Love unit

Chit Chat on communication and commitment…

And for those that would like to communicate with their own yard apes a titch bit more effectively… I share the ‘Rosetta Stone’ (or Babbel?) my Sociology class cobbled together…

RIZZ: charisma/’got game’

FIRE: awesome/so good

DRIP: style/outfit/your look

BET: affirmation/ yah/’you bet’/agreement

NO CAP: not fake/not a lie/truth

SUS: suspicious/questionable

BUSSIN: amazing/great

EXTRA: dramatic/over the top

GYATT: big bum/booty/butt

SLAPS: excellent/amazing/wow!

LOW KEY: subtle feels/keeping it on the downlow

SIMP: doing too much for a crush/partner/over-indulgent/’try hard’

W: a win

FANUM TAX: eating a friend’s food (similar to dad tax)

BOUJEE: fancy/extravagant/rich

CRINGE(Y): embarrassing

GUAP: money/huge wads of cash

DRAG: rip into/make fun of/mock/belittle

SKIBIDI: essentially means nothing/ridiculous/bad

SIGMA: popular/stoic/strong/cool guy

OHIO: weird/creepy/lame

MID: below average/mediocre

SALTY: bitter/resentful/irritated

GAS: marijuana/something cool

SLAY: do really well at something/’killed it’/exceptional

FINNA: getting ready to do something/fixing to go

BRUH (BRO): whoever you are talking to/no gender/mom :)

PS. I'm not 100% sure these are accurate, because - as I've perhaps neglected to mention - I rarely understand what they say to me anyway?

[robotgirlservos]

Alright, so

I have had a few questions from other sites and dms and stuff and I think yall need one of these

healing lessons with Titch!

Covered in the next few minutes or so will be a few basics on healing.  Even if you aren’t a green eye and don’t have healing powers, this should still be useful so that you know the limits of your green eyed friends.

Just like any other eye color, green eyes see the world with a different “tint”, ours reveals the “healthiness” of a living creature.

If someone has an injury, the injured part will lose its healthiness tint, some injuries are severe enough that the healthiness tint is drained from a larger area than the injury covers.

Bodies can recover on their own, even adapting to the loss of major body parts.  We will come back to this in just a bit.

First, we need to understand violet tint, which highlights the shape of a beings soul.  Most of the time, a persons violet tint matches their body with only minor deviation.

The most common exception to this is people who have lost fingers or maybe a limb, and while green tint may show that they’re in fine health, violet tint will reveal the parts that are missing.  Some people and animals are just fine even if they are missing some of the parts most members of their same species would typically have. They will also be missing that part in their violet tint.  Some people are just built different and we gotta respect that.

A few times, I’ve met people who had waaay different violet tints compared to how their bodies looked.  Some were as minor as gender differences, and one guy I met had the soul of a dragon!

All of these also can be healed, but it takes quite a bit of skill and power to get right, and it could be dangerous to the patient if done wrong.

Something less fun we should all be aware of was how some things can hurt you without leaving a visible mark to anyone but a violet eye.  Things like being heartbreak and harassment actually literally crush the soul and too much can permanently harm or even outright kill someone with no physical (healable) injury.  Fortunately souls can regrow over time, just be sure to stay safe.  If you need any help you can always come to me.

On a slightly more positive note, even if someone has died from a physical wound, a quick enough healer may be able to bring them back if set to work immediately.  The soul sometiems sticks around for up to a few minutes after the body can no longer support it. 

Generally, 3 minutes is the accepted timeframe for being able to bring someone back, but certain factors can raise or lower the time.  Cooling the body way down or having a loved one present drastically increases how long the soul will stick around for.  It’s never a guarantee, though. 

Some things are just out of everyone’s control.

...

Alright!  Now for your burning questions about eye transplants!

First off, even without his eyes, this guy can still use his orange eye powers, though he cant see anything, so he can’t really see anything in an orange tint.

Next, we’ve given him green eyes, and with his green eyes he can see!  in green tint!  However, he is still an orange eye at heart and can’t use any green eye powers, but he can still use his orange eye powers

Finally, after a while (or if someone just healed him) the green in his eyes fades and is replaced with regular orange tint

Eye color change is never permanent.

The closest I could think of is when someones soul got totally crushed, but their body just continued on as a husk.  Then something else came and took over it.

Anyway, hope this clears things up!  I’ll be happy to answer any questions you may have

[storm-alert]

OKAY LADIES (plus some men)

I’ve been meaning to post this video since Thursday but I’ve been super busy and I’ve rarely been home so my 3g would never be up to posting this.

ANYWAY this friend of mine interviewed Titch and had him record this video message for me and I’m just so 😭😭😭😭 dead honestly because this is so cute!!! Plus Titch is so cute and this is so sweet of both of them!!!

also he pronounced my name wrong but who even cares because this is the best thing ever I literally love this more than anything in the world right now

[irishseeeker]

                                        the story of us

summary:  Five times Kate Sheffield and Anthony Bridgeton were just friends and one time they were more.

find chapter 1 here or here

find chapter 2 here or here

find chapter 3 here or here

find chapter 4 here or here

find chapter 5 part 1  here or here

----

chapter 5 part 2: all along there was some invisible string tying you to me

Anthony Bridgerton was an idiot.

He wasn’t just an idiot. You see, usually idiots are not aware of their idiocy. They live carefree and blissfully unaware of their idiocy.

Anthony knew he was being an idiot.

It was eating him alive.

He didn’t stop it, though. He didn’t know what else to do. He kept his distance from Kate as much as he could. It was the only thing he could think to do.

It was just so difficult.

He would screw it up. He would break them. It’s what he did. He screwed things up. He had nearly screwed things up with Daphne and Simon, he had screwed things up with Siena and he would screw things up with Kate.

Kate had been a constant in his life since he was nineteen years old.

Kate was his lifeline.

Anthony knew he shouldn’t put that all on her but he didn’t have a choice. There was nothing he could control when it came to Kate Sheffield. He had been completely hers since the moment they sat down in that lecture hall and she announced that he was wrong to their entire lecture.

Then proceeded to argue with him for the next thirty minutes.

He never stood a chance.

Kate deserved everything. She didn’t need someone who had an irrational fear of dropping dead from a bee sting and couldn’t manage a healthy relationship.

It’s not like he tried.

What was the point? They weren’t Kate.

Anthony needed time.

He needed time to figure it out. He could manage it. He had to get his head straight and learn to just erase his feelings and the constant pain. He had to learn to adapt and inevitably watch her be happy with someone else.

If they got too close, they would implode. The fine line between them had grown thinner and thinner and they were in the danger zone. They had been since their kiss.

It couldn’t happen again.

The thing about Kate was she still had that magic.

Kate believed in love. Kate wanted that struck by lightning, unconditional and inconceivable type of love. She deserved that type of love.

Kate deserved to feel the way Anthony felt every time he looked at her.

Anthony wasn’t a complete pessimist, he knew love existed. He had grown up watching his parents madly in love until his dad died. His mother had barely recovered from it. Anthony still hadn’t recovered from it. Violet Bridgerton still had bad days, days where she forgot to pick up Hyacinth or Gregory from school or lay in bed all day, barely moving. How could he do that to Kate? How could he let himself go through that?

That type of love wasn’t something he could give her.

That’s why he couldn't try with Kate. If there was a chance something could happen between them, he wouldn’t take it.

He wouldn't ruin that kind of love for her.

He would always love her, he would just have to let someone else do it.

He just had to figure out how to.

His only plan so far was avoiding her.

That plan was pretty flawed so far.

Anthony didn’t want to hurt Kate. He knew he was hurting her anyway, he didn’t miss her hurt expressions or uncharacteristic silences when he made an excuse that he had to go out for a while or that he would be late coming home. He was trying to fix things before something bad happened.

It’s just incredibly difficult to avoid the one person you spend all your time with and you happen to live with.

He wasn’t necessarily avoiding her, he was just distancing himself temporarily from her while he sorted things out. which is something he liked to convince himself of to try not feel like a complete and utter asshole.

He had even booked hotel rooms to try to get some sleep. How could he sleep when Kate was a few metres away from him? How could he concentrate on anything but Kate when she was close to him?

He needed to protect them.

He needed boundaries.

He also needed Kate.

“Anthony!” Hyacinth shouted cheerfully, grinning widely at her brother as she ran towards him from the school’s front door. Anthony had been leaning against the railing of the gate, waiting for Hyacinth and Gregory to finish school.

His afternoon meetings had been cancelled so he called their nanny, Pippa and told her to take the rest of the day off. His mother had been down at Aubrey Hall for the week with builders planning some reconstruction and she was due back this evening. She hadn’t said anything yet but he suspected it had something to do with preparations for Daphne’s wedding. Anthony wanted to see his siblings and he needed a distraction from the million thoughts running through his head.

“Hi titch,” Anthony said, grinning back at her as he leaned down and picked her up, resting her on his hip. She was too old at seven to be carried around, but he didn’t really care. He needed Hyacinth to stay little for as long as possible. “How was school? Have you seen Greg?”

“It was fun,” She murmured, resting her cheek on his shoulder and letting out a small yawn. “We had to draw our favourite animal, so I obviously drew Newton.”

Anthony couldn’t stop the smirk breaking out on his face. “Obviously. Can I see?”

Hyacinth nodded slowly, wiggling out of his arms so she could open up her Jurassic Park backpack. She pulled out a piece of paper with her drawing, which had a crayon version of what Anthony guessed was Hyacinth, Gregory, Kate, Anthony and the ginger blob in the middle that was Newton.

Something inside of Anthony���s chest clenched.

“Be careful,” Hyacinth scolded, prying the paper out of Anthony’s hands. “I’m going to give it to Kate.”

Anthony bent down to Hyacinth’s eye level, smiling at her as he held open her back and put the picture back inside. “Kate will love it.”

Kate would love it. She was so incredible with Hyacinth and Gregory and they adored her. Kate kept everything they had given her over the years, it had been pinned up on Anthony’s fridge along with the drawings and pictures he’d received from them since Kate had moved in.

They also adored her demon corgi, who had taken over Anthony’s flat for weeks. The little shit climbed into his bed every single night and he knew Anthony wouldn’t kick him out. He had given up a long time ago.

He also started walking him whenever Kate couldn’t, she usually brought him in the evenings and Anthony in the morning when he went for his daily jog.

It made Kate insanely happy when he did it, so obviously Anthony was going to do it.

He had quickly snapped a sly picture when Hyacinth wasn’t looking, he had to send it to Kate. There was no harm in it. Right?

It was just a picture.

Anthony: [sent an image]

Anthony: Your demon inspired Hyacinth’s picture for animal day. She’s excited to show you this later.

Kate: omg. I want to cry that is so bloody cute. Can’t wait to pin it up on the fridge. You look like you’ve put on a few pounds though x

Kate: please do not talk about your godson like that

Anthony: Please, I’m still the best looking guy you’ll ever know.

Kate: sorry, it’s spelled p-a-t-h-e-t-i-c*

Anthony: Sorry, it’s spelled I-am-letting-you-live-in-my-flat*

Kate: My presence is a gift.

Anthony: Also-We’re not getting into this again. I have no familial relation to Newton.

Kate: He has your middle name!

Anthony: Dogs don’t have middle names!

Kate: Do you want to see his birth certificate?

Anthony: Do you mean the certificate you made yourself and framed on your wall? Unfortunately, I’ve seen it more than once. That’s enough for a lifetime.

Kate: [sent an image]

Anthony: Your middle finger is a bit wonky.

Kate: [sent an image]

Anthony: I hope your boss saw you take that.

Anthony chuckled under his breath as he looked up from his phone, spotting Gregory talking to a few of his friends across the playground before waving at Anthony, jogging towards them. He glanced back at the text chain, internally cursing at himself. Why did he always have to flirt with her? He couldn’t help it.

“Hey mate!” Anthony grinned as Gregory reached them, wearing his football kit. They were heading straight to Gregory’s football training in a nearby park, where Anthony and Hyacinth would go for a walk and wait for training to finish. Anthony ruffled his hair, taking his bag and sports bag. “Good day?”

“Hey!” Gregory said, grunting at Hyacinth before beaming up at Anthony. Anthony knew it wouldn’t last forever but he’d pay every cent he had to keep Greg looking at him like he was his hero. “Are you coming to watch me play football?”

“Of course I am,” Anthony said, nudging at Hyacinth to start walking towards the car. “I can’t wait. Are you excited? Come on, we better get going.”

“Anthony! Hello!” A blonde woman Anthony had definitely seen before was standing around a group of women, with their kids running around them and screaming. She practically pushed another woman out of the way to get to him. “How are you?”

He couldn’t for the life of him remember who she was. “Hello,” He said lamely, glancing at Gregory and Hyacinth who looked bored and were absolutely no help. “I’m great, thank you. How are you? Nice to see you again. I’m sorry, we’re just in a bit of a rush.”

It was slightly rude of him but once one of these parents cornered you, you’d be stuck there for hours. He wasn’t going to get stuck talking about a bake sale for the next half an hour.

“I’m lovely thank you-Oh! Yes, of course. You’re such a good brother. Have a good day!” The blonde woman called after Anthony as he hastily nudged Hyacinth and Gregory along. “If you need any help or are interested in the bake sale next week, I can give you my number-”

“Get in,” Anthony practically hissed urgently, waving his hand in the direction of the women but quickly flicking open his boot and car.

“One of them is Sasha’s mum,” Hyacinth grumbled, glancing back at the herd of women whose eyes had followed them towards Anthony’s car. “They think you’re good looking.”

Anthony threw their bags in the boot and opened the back door, winking at Hyacinth as she climbed into the car. “Well, they’re not wrong.”

Anthony laughed as Hyacinth and Gregory both made disgusted faces.

Gregory frowned at his passenger side. “I’m too old for a car seat.”

Anthony rolled his eyes. “The law would argue otherwise. In.”

Gregory took one look at his brother’s face and didn’t argue, grumbling as he moved into the car seat. Anthony checked their seatbelts and once everything was set, he climbed in himself and drove off to the park.

“When are you and Kate getting married?”

“What?” Anthony’s eyes snapped towards the rearview mirror, widening as he looked at Hyacinth.

Hyacinth didn’t seem phased whatsoever by her question. “When are you and Kate getting married?”

“We’re not,” Anthony said with a steady voice, glancing towards Greg who was too consumed with his Nintendo to care about the conversation. Is that what they both taught? “Why would you ask that?”

Hyacinth shrugged. “Daph and Simon are getting married.”

“That’s because they’re engaged.”

“Oh,” Hyacinth said slowly, her eyebrows furrowing slightly as she processed the conversation. “Why aren’t you and Kate engaged?”

“Kate and I are friends,” Anthony explained, feeling the dampness of his palms against the steering wheel. “We’re not like Daphne and Simon.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Anthony said, a slight edge of irritation in his voice as he focused back on the road. He didn’t need to be mean, Hyacinth didn’t understand what she was talking about. “Why are you asking so many questions?”

“Well, people in love get married right?”

“Yes.”

“Daphne and Simon love each other?”

“They do.”

“Did Mum and Dad love each other?”

Anthony felt himself soften. “Very much.”

“Don’t you love Kate?”

“I do,” Anthony said hesitantly because he did in the exact way Hyacinth was asking but he didn’t really feel like getting into that. “People can love each other and not get married. It’s different for Kate and I-”

“No it’s not,” Hyacinth interrupted, a finality to the tone of her voice. It was the tone she used before she had a complete fit or meltdown. “I better be a flower girl.”

Anthony knew he was fighting a losing battle, and the irony of that statement wasn’t lost on him in relation to his current predicament. “At our non-existent wedding? Of course you can.”

Hyacinth stuck his tongue out at her and it reminded him so much of Kate, he nearly laughed out of relief and pain.

There it was again.

Kate.

Kate was constantly on his mind.

This was the problem. It was hit fault. This wasn’t the first time a family member, well, not just his family-anyone-had suggested there was something going on between him and Kate. They weren’t just friends. Kate was his best friend, she was everything but she had always been something a little bit more.

He had found her eight years ago and he didn’t know what to do.

Now, it felt like it was too late.

What the hell was he going to do?

Anthony couldn’t get Kate’s hurt look out of his head as he charged out of the house. It even momentarily distracted him from the blind fury he was feeling while he drove to the police station.

Benedict and Simon were right behind him, Benedict climbing into the front and Simon into the back. Anthony put the car in gear, speeding out of the driveway. The police station Colin was detained in wasn’t far and Anthony had already sorted out everything.

“Why did you do that?” Benedict asked, breaking the silent and tense atmosphere in the car as Anthony danced along the speeding limit, his foot pressing onto the accelerator to get to Colin.

He was relieved his brother was okay because Anthony was going to kill him himself.

“What?”

“Why didn’t you let Kate come? Over Simon?” Benedict asked, staring flatly at Anthony. “No offence Simon.”

Simon shook his head, pursing his lips. “None taken. I’m happy-well, not happy-happy to help.”

“I didn’t let Kate do anything.” Anthony said, in complete disbelief Benedict was bringing this up. There was a reason he didn’t let Kate come, he was trying to distance her from all of his shit. She didn’t need to be involved in this.

“Oh right,” Benedict said, sarcasm dripping in his tone which pissed off Anthony even further. “That makes sense. As if Kate isn’t involved in everything to do with you and our family. Kate is a part of our family. Why haven’t you done something about it?”

“She doesn’t need to be involved in this.” What the hell was Benedict doing? Why did it feel like everyone was against him? Anthony was trying, he was bloody trying and everything still went to complete shit.

Benedict didn’t buy a word of it. “Are you ever going to tell her?”

“Don’t start this shit tonight Ben,” Anthony said, his tense voice a warning, not a request. “Our brother is in jail.”

“I’m just saying-”

“I didn’t ask,” Anthony interrupted swiftly, his grip on the wheel tightening significantly. He could practically feel the vein in his forehead bulging. “Drop it.”

Anthony could see Benedict glance back at Simon, making some sort of gesture but Simon just shrugged, shaking his head.

Smart move, Hastings.

“Let’s go,” Anthony said once they arrived at the station, getting out of the car and walking into the empty police station. He paid Colin’s bail, filling out a form as he waited for an officer to bring Colin out.

Colin eventually appeared, looking worse for wear. He didn’t look in any way hurt, which made Anthony relax slightly. The blue shirt he was wearing was rumpled and the mop of brown hair on the top of his head was sticking up in various directions, but he was okay.

“Anthony-”

“Not a fucking word,” Anthony snapped, his voice deadly low as he looked at Colin who shut his mouth quickly. “Follow Ben to the car. Now.”

Benedict lightly squeezed Colin on the shoulder as Colin walked towards him, opening and closing his mouth before deciding to do what Anthony said.

Anthony had to take a few deep breaths before he walked out towards the car. He needed to keep his cool. Whatever happened, Colin was his brother and it didn’t need to result in a huge argument. As long as Colin took responsibility for his actions, it would be relatively okay.

Colin was twenty-two years old and still acting like a complete child. He traveled whenever he wasn’t at university and didn’t show any responsibility when it came to their family and his own life. Anthony was trying to not get too involved, getting Colin to even go to university had taken ten years off his life but sometimes Colin really tested his patience.

Anthony’s cool temperament lasted about twenty seconds once he got into the car.

“It wasn’t my fault.”

Anthony snorted while Benedict sighed deeply. “It never is, is it Colin?” “I was drunk,” Colin said, slumping in his seat like Gregory did when he was annoyed about something. “Marina dumped me. I met up with my mates and got drunk. It was a mistake. How was I supposed to know you’re not meant to piss on statues?”

Anthony hesitated for a moment, glancing back at his brother’s face. Colin was in pain. He had really liked Marina, the whirlwind he had met while skiing in France over Christmas. Anthony had never seen his brother fall so hard. “I’m sorry about Marina, Colin. I am. That’s not an excuse to act like a complete and utter idiot and break the law.”

“It was an accident!” Colin snapped back, his voice rising in line with Anthony's. “What do you want me to do, Ant?”

“I just bailed you out of jail,” Anthony snapped, the anger he had been holding in finally coming out. He was racing home within the speed limit, the confinement of the car making him claustrophobic. “I made sure that that stayed off your permanent record so you didn’t get thrown out of university or asked about in job interviews. Instead of acting like a spoiled little brat you could be a little more grateful and shut up.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re right,” Anthony snapped, really focusing on not losing his head. “Yet I did it anyway.”

“I’m so fucking sorry I’m not perfect like you, Anthony,” Colin said, his voice full of venom as Anthony pulled up into the driveway. “That I’m not perfect like Ben, Daph, El, Franny or fuck it, Dad! I’m so sorry I don’t live up to your perfect expectations.”

“Oh shut up Colin,” Anthony snapped, his voice just as angry as Colin's. “You fucked up. I’m not interested in listening to your sob story to make yourself into a victim. Take some responsibility for once in your life.”

Anthony felt the guilt flood his body as he spoke to his brother. He knew he would be ashamed of himself later, he already was as the words sunk in. He was just so angry. Colin never took responsibility for anything and this was just another time he had gone too far and expected no consequences and Anthony to pick up the pieces.

“Fine,” Colin said, shaking his head as he flung the door open. “Here’s some responsibility for you. I’m dropping out of university.”

Then he slammed Anthony’s car door shut and all hell broke loose.

Anthony didn’t have anything left to say.

His fight with Colin, every insult and dagger he had thrown at him, circled around in his head and rang in his ears. He couldn’t find the words to speak as Kate drove them home. He wanted to say something, to put Kate at ease as she anxiously glanced at him the entire way home.

He just didn’t have anything left in him.

Colin’s words were on repeat in his head like a broken record.

“I don’t need to try to be a carbon copy of Dad to figure out my life. I’m not you, Anthony. Desperately trying to be someone he’ll never be.”

Colin was right.

Anthony sat down on the couch in his flat, his limbs heavy and deflated as the reality of his brother’s words hit him like a tonne of bricks.

He then did something that he hadn’t done since the day his father died, in his mother’s bedroom, away from his family.

He cried.

The sobs hit him like a wave and moved throughout his body, flooding out of him and everything he had been holding in for years. He cried for his dad, who he missed so much it killed him a little bit inside every single day. He cried for the man he desperately was trying to be but knew he never would. He cried for his family who had a gaping hole in it he could never fill. He cried for his family, who he tried so hard for but somehow always managed to fuck it up.

Anthony cried for everything that he had lost, everything that he was selfish enough to be angry about. Everyone he didn’t go, everything he didn’t do and everyone he didn’t meet because he had to step up.

He cried for Kate, the person who made him feel like he was worth something and that he was doing something right sometimes. He could never allow himself to let her know how he felt. He couldn’t do that to her.

Kate held him against her chest, her head resting on top of his as she moved her hand up and down his back, murmuring soothing words as he cried until nothing else could come out.

Anthony was surprised when Colin showed up at his flat the next morning. Kate had made him a cup of tea before putting Newton on his lead, throwing one final glare at Colin and a reassuring smile at Anthony before leaving their flat.

His flat.

His flat.

It was incredibly awkward, as both the Bridgerton men sat on Anthony’s couch in complete silence. Colin was tapping his foot against the ground, looking up at Anthony and back at the floor as his mouth opened and closed as he decided what to say.

“I’ve always liked Kate.”

That took Anthony by surprise. “Who wouldn’t?”

“For a second there,” Colin said, a half chuckle coming out of his mouth that was muffled by his pained expression. “I didn’t think she’d let me in.”

“As someone who has been on the wrong side of Kate many times,” Anthony said, smiling slightly as leaned back into the couch. “I wouldn’t recommend it.”

“She’s terrifying.”

“Absolutely petrifying,” Anthony said, nodding in agreement. “Don’t tell her I said that.”

“Do you hate me?”

Anthony’s head snapped up, the strange lightness of their conversation fading completely. “Of course I don’t hate you.”

“I’d hate me.”

Despite everything that had happened, Anthony was reminded of who was sitting right in front of him. Colin was so like their dad it hurt Anthony sometimes. He was fun, happy, irrational, spontaneous and he cared so passionately about the people in his life. He was also young and still trying to figure things out. He made mistakes. He had his heartbroken. He was just trying.

They were all just trying.

“I love you, Colin,” Anthony said firmly, because it was true and there wasn’t anything his brother could say to ever make Anthony think or feel otherwise. “There’s nothing that could ever happen to make me not love you. Okay? I only want what is best for you. I know how unreasonable I can be sometimes. Maybe I was wrong for thinking what was best for me is what is best for you. I just want you to be okay if something ever happened to me.”

Colin visibly gulped. “Nothing is going to happen to you, Ant. I’ll never be more sorry for what I said about Dad. I didn’t mean it. I am a horrible person for saying that to you. I’ll never forgive myself for it. I do mean this, though. You’re not Dad, Ant. You’re you. You don’t need to be Dad. You don’t need to be anyone else but you. Everyone needs you to be you. We all have gotten this far because you’re you, Ant. Not Dad. Not anyone. You.”

Anthony was absolutely speechless as he listened to Colin. Colin and him had clashed over the years but they were so alike in so many ways.

“I know I haven’t always made things easy on you. I think about him a lot. If he would be proud of me. I don’t think he would.”

“Of course he would,” Anthony said firmly, finally finding his voice. “There’s so much to be proud of. You’re a fantastic person, Colin. You annoy the shit out of me sometimes but you’re an incredible person.”

“I want you to be proud of me.” Colin’s voice was shaky as he spoke, the emotion of the situation finally coming to the surface.

“Colin,” Anthony said seriously, looking at his brother. “There’s no world where I’m not proud of you. You shouldn’t worry about what I think-”

“Anthony,” Colin said seriously, looking his brother in the eye for the first time that morning. “All I think about is what you think. You’re the voice inside of my head. Even if you sometimes annoy the shit out of me, I need you there. I know we all wouldn’t be okay if it wasn’t for you. I’m so sorry I haven’t shown you how much I appreciate that. I’m so sorry. I’ll never be more sorry for that.”

The large lump in Anthony’s throat was becoming extremely painful. “You don’t need to apologize-”

“I do and I am,” Colin said, standing up and moving towards Anthony. “I love you. You’re the type of person all of us can only hope we can be. You’re my big brother. I’m going to hug you now. It’s going to be awkward but I feel like it’s necessary.”

They wrapped their arms around each other, slapping each other’s backs and holding onto each other tightly.

They eventually pulled back, both turning their heads slightly to compose themselves and wipe their eyes with the back of their sleeves.

“That’s enough emotion for a lifetime,” Colin murmured, moving back to his original seat and letting out a sigh. “Beer?”

“Beer.”

Of all the places Anthony Bridgerton imagined himself to be at this point in his life, it wasn’t at his sisters and best friend’s engagement party.

Simon had surprised Anthony by showing up to his flat after him and Colin had sorted things out. Simon had kept a respectful distance since Anthony had found out about Daphne and him, not pushing Anthony into anything and forcing their friendship back to the place it was.

Instead, something else had happened. They were in a new place. They were starting off a clean slate. They were back to hanging out, playing golf, grabbing dinner and drinks. Anthony was his best man. He didn’t want to hold grudges anymore. He wanted his best friend back.

The past week had surprisingly been great. He had decided to put everything on hold with Kate and he had spent an unbelievable amount of time with her this week, going against every part of his initial plan. The only bad part of his week was moving Kate into her new flat. The flat felt so empty and lifeless without her.

He even missed Newton, which is something he’d keep to himself until his deathbed.

Simon joined him at the bar, smacking his back. “Good speech, mate.”

“Mm,” Anthony said, giving him a sarcastic grin as he finished off his whiskey. “I’m happy you enjoyed it.”

“It really came from the heart.”

“Let’s not get soppy,” Anthony said, nodding in thanks to the bartender as he topped up his whiskey glass. “I have just decided I can tolerate you again.”

“Please, I was your favourite person until Miss Kate Sheffield came along,” Simon teased, grinning at Anthony’s side-eye. “Not that I blame you. She’s really something.”

“Back to that speech though,” Simon said, his back to the bar as he surveyed the buzzing dance floor. “I don’t think it was us you were entirely talking about.”

Kate.

Anthony’s heart stopped in his chest. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Of course you don’t,” Simon said, downing the rest of the contents of his glass with a gleeful smirk. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to go dance with my fiance.”

Bastard.

His family really needed to learn to mind their own bloody business.

“Anthony.”

Anthony’s vision was fuzzy. He could hear a light buzzing in his ear. Kate’s words were still playing in his ears.

“Forget me. I don’t want to speak to you ever again.”

He couldn’t let this happen. He wouldn’t let this happen. He had tried so hard to protect them and it only ended with him fucking everything up so royally.

He felt like he wasn’t in control of his body, his eyes were stinging and his limbs were moving out of his own accord. He was bustling through the crowd, trying to find Kate who had disappeared into it.

“Anthony!”

Anthony barely heard his own name until someone grabbed his arm. Francesca.

“Did you know Michael was here?”

Anthony was still moving across the room, Francesca still beside him. “What?”

“Can you believe it?” Francesca said, her bottom lip sticking out as she shook her head in disbelief. More emotions were running across Francesca’s face than Anthony had ever seen in his life. “Ben invited him. John didn’t even know! Apparently he’s Ben's new protégé.”

“Fran, can you hold on a second?” Anthony said, shaking his head and running his hands through his hair, pulling at it. “I’m sorry. I-I need to find Kate. I have to find Kate.”

“Anthony,” Francesca said, her face flooding with concern as she steadied Anthony’s balance with her two hands on his arms. “What is going on? What happened?”

“Anthony.” Benedict had arrived, with Sophie beside him, an anxious look across his face.

“Piss off Ben,” Francesca snapped, her anger at her brother not fading in the slightest as she turned back to Anthony. “Anthony? What happened?”

“He’s asked to intern with me this summer! What was I meant to say Fran? I didn’t realize there was something going on between you-“

“There is nothing going on between us! I’m with John!” Francesca hissed, her anger momentarily shocking the two Bridgertons and Sophie. Francesca had always been calm, cool and collected. That wasn’t what was happening tonight. “I don’t need any relationship advice from someone who snuck around for over a year. Get off your pedestal.”

“It seems like Benedict can’t keep his nose out of anything.” Anthony spat out his brother’s name and didn’t care for Ben’s slight flinch. He needed someone else to blame.

He needed to find Kate.

“Someone had to do something!” Sophie snapped, her eyes completely on Anthony. “We’ve all watched this go on for years and it’s exhausting. Where’s Kate, Anthony?”

“What happened with Kate?” Francesca asked again, her eyes solely on Anthony.

“I was going to find her-“ Anthony said helplessly, his chest tightening which was making it hard to breathe. He had messed it up phenomenally. She was never going to forgive him. “It’s bad. We had a fight. A bad one.”

The meaning of his words seemed to translate as Sophie’s eyes widened, her mouth dropping open slightly as she hastily turned to look around the room.

“I think you’ve done enough.” Sophie snapped, Anthony, Francesca and Benedict’s eyes were wide as they watched Sophie storm away in search of Kate.

“Ant-“

“It’s fine, Ben. I’m sorry I ruined your night. I have to go,” Anthony said, “This is my mess. I’ll fix it.”

“You don’t have to fix it alone.”

“I have to fix it with Kate.” Anthony said, charging through the rest of the crowd and searching everywhere for Kate. Benedict, Colin and Francesca were on his tail, trying to convince him to come inside and sit down and talk to them. He couldn’t. He tried her phone a million times that night but she didn’t pick up. He had to fix this.

Eventually, it was confirmed by Sophie that Kate had left the gallery. She had refused to let Sophie into her flat and that was as much as Anthony was told.

Kate was gone.

Anthony woke up with an excruciating headache and aching limbs. He grumbled as he sat up, feeling a hard exterior under him. He was sleeping in his old childhood bed.

The last time he had slept in this bed was the day before he had left university. The day before he met Kate and his life changed forever. He hated saying it, but it was true. His life had completely changed the minute he met and argued with Kate Sheffield and now-

Now he could have lost her forever.

“You’re up.”

Anthony jumped slightly as he saw Benedict and Colin standing at the foot of his bed, “Were you two watching me sleep? That’s creepy.”

“We were making sure you didn’t choke on your own vomit,” Benedict said carefully, a stern expression on his face but he cowered slightly as Anthony looked at him. Benedict had certainly meddled last night. “You drank a lot after Kate left.” “I’d be impressed with how much you drank if it wasn’t because of such tragic circumstances,” Colin joked, failing to lighten the mood with a joke. “I made you some coffee.”

“Thanks.” Anthony said sourly, nodding at Colin but not appreciating the reminder of what a terrible person Anthony was. Kate had gone and he couldn’t cope, so he drank until he passed out.

Why did he open his stupid mouth and tell her about the kiss? Why didn’t he tell her he loved her back? Why did he try to explain to her why they would never work? It was the everything he had been telling himself again and again and when he had said the words out last night, they were meaningless and stupid. The only thing they had achieved was destroying them both.

What was wrong with him?

He couldn’t get the look of anguish on her face out of his head.

He had done the one thing he had sworn he would never do.

He had hurt her.

“I’m sorry about the gallery, Ben.” Anthony said, shaking his head in shame.

“I’m not,” Benedict said, shrugging as he leaned against the wall. “We sold all of my pieces. I knew what I was doing when I put that piece up there. I’m sorry, Anthony. I really am. I never wanted it to cause all this.”

“You didn’t cause any of this,” Anthony said, shaking his head and letting out a deep sigh. “I did.”

“No, he definitely caused this,” Colin said, completely ignoring Benedict’s glare. “That was a dick move. Ant and Kate were always going to come to blows and have it out but you just threw the toaster into the bathtub with that stunt.”

“Anthony got involved with my love life!” Benedict exclaimed, turning around to glare at his younger brother. “I wanted to help-”

“That’s because Ant is relatively okay at sorting out everyone else’s love life and is absolutely shocking at sorting out his own,” Colin said, shooting Anthony a cheeky grin who just glared back. “Tell us what happened.”

“I was furious about the picture.” Anthony said slowly, not wanting to relive the events of last night ever again. He would have to, everytime he told this story and when he saw Kate again. If he saw her again. She had never responded to any of his calls or messages last night and he hadn’t tried again this morning.

He didn’t want to hurt her further by harassing her.

Anthony needed to see her and speak to her.

“I was acting really unfairly. We started arguing. I said some things. Kate said some things. I said something really stupid,” Anthony said, letting out a deep breath before he continued. “Kate told me she was in love with me. I didn’t say it back. I told her I remembered that kiss I had pretended to forget on my birthday last year. She told me she never wanted to speak to me again.”

“That,” Colin was the first one to speak, “That is a lot worse than I imagined.”

“Helpful Colin,” Benedict said dryly, sitting down on the bed beside Anthony and patting his shoulder. “You messed up. Yes. Kate is hurt. She’ll forgive you. You’re Kate and Anthony. You can fix this.”

“I don’t know, Ben. I’ve never seen that look on her face before. She won’t speak to me,” Anthony said, falling back onto the bed and feeling utterly hopeless. “She’s never going to forgive me. I don’t know what to say.”

Benedict bit his lip, nodding his head. “Ant, you’ve never been able to talk to us the way you’ve been able to talk to Kate.”

“The one person you can talk to won’t talk to you.” Colin said slowly, as if he was putting something together in his head.

Anthony and Benedict both turned towards Colin and raised an eyebrow.

Colin’s face lit up, as if he had just won the lottery. He grinned widely at his two brothers, who looked at him suspiciously. “I have an idea.”

Colin’s brilliant idea was therapy.

Apparently, Colin had a heart to heart with Penelope Fetherington the morning after their argument. Penelope and Eloise were studying together for the day at their house and Eloise had left Penelope in the kitchen with Colin whilst she went off for a shower.

Eloise had not been talking to Colin after the argument, which led to his and Penelope’s strange but heartfelt conversation.

Penelope recommended Colin go to therapy.

That’s how Anthony ended up taking Colin’s therapy appointment at 10am that Saturday morning.

“Why are you here today, Anthony?”

Anthony hadn’t been to therapy since university. It wasn’t for this reason. He had been stressed, having bad panic attacks and feeling overwhelmed by everything. He was back again, for similar but different reasons.

“My brothers thought it would be good if I spoke to someone.” Anthony answered honestly, not feeling entirely comfortable to open up to a complete stranger whose office he had walked into two minutes ago.

“Do you think you need to be here?” His therapist asked, scribbling something down in her notebook.

“I suppose so. No. Yes, I do. I do think so,” Anthony said, scrambling over his words before he sat up straighter in his seat. “I do. It’s what Kate would tell me to do.”

“Who is Kate?”

“Kate is my best friend,” Anthony said instinctively, the meaning of the words hitting him a few seconds later. “Well.”

“Well?”

“It’s complicated.”

His therapist looked straight at him, giving him a friendly but stern smile. “I’m trained in complicated.”

“We’re not currently speaking,” Anthony said slowly, deciding to just let it all out. This is what therapy was for, right? He could be honest for once in my life. “It’s all my fault.”

“How long has it been?” His therapist asked, glancing at the round clock on her wall.

“About 12 hours?”

“Okay.”

“That’s really strange for us,” Anthony hastily explained, quickly feeling embarrassed about the situation and if he was appearing overdramatic. “We talk all the time. We lived together up until last week.

His therapist continued to write down a few sentences, the scraping of the pen against her paper making Anthony’s skin itch. “Tell me what happened.”

“It was a bad argument,” Anthony began, the memories of last night filling him with a heavy dread. “My brother had put a picture of us, multiple pictures of us, on display in a gallery. I panicked and I reacted badly. We both said hurtful things. The worst we’ve ever had. She told me she was in love with me. I told her I remembered our kiss I pretended to forget over a year ago. It ended with her telling me she never wanted to see me again.”

“Do you love her back?”

The question caught Anthony completely off guard. This was the most honest he had been in a very long time and his therapist was brushing over a lot of details, focusing on particular ones. “No, I do.”

“But you didn’t tell her that?”

“No.”

“Hmm,” His therapist said, nodding her head as she continued to scribble down a few sentences. “That is complicated. Could you tell me about your parents?”

Anthony’s breath caught in his throat. He couldn’t face that today. When he had gone to therapy previously, they had sometimes spoken about his parents, mainly his father. Anthony didn’t have the strength. “I don’t want to talk about my father. I need to know what to say to Kate.”

“That’s okay,” She said, nodding her head slowly. “You have every right to not answer this question and I will drop it. Why do you not want to talk about your father?”

“He died when I was eighteen.” Anthony explained, figuring it would come out sooner or later.

“That must have been difficult.”

“It was.” Anthony’s words were caught between his teeth.

“Do you have any siblings?”

“I have seven,” Anthony answered, cracking his knuckles in his lap. “I’m the eldest.”

“I can imagine that’s a lot of responsibility at the age of eighteen,” She said slowly, as if she was trying to figure something out. “Especially when suffering from such a loss.”

“It is,” Anthony said, avoiding her eyes completely as he looked around the room. He didn’t want to talk about his family. That’s not why he came. “It’s my family. I’d do anything for them.”

“Why do you think you don’t deserve love?”

Anthony gaped at her. “I don’t think that.”

“If you were willing to step up and take responsibility for your family and ensure their happiness,” She said, leaning forward in her chair. “Why can’t you do the same for yourself?”

“I don’t want to lose her,” Anthony said, his voice coming out a lot shakier and lower than it had in a long time. “She’s everything to me. Everything. I screw things up. I’ve never been good with relationships. I desperately tried to not screw things up and I did it anyway. I really tried to stop feeling like this. I even went to America to stop feeling like this and try to find someone new. It just always comes back to this and now-now it’s too late.”

“This is terribly cliche, but it’s the truth. It’s never too late and you will never know until you try. Why are you so sure you and Kate will fail? I say you and Kate as there are two of you in this. It seems like you put a lot of pressure on yourself. When it comes to your family and your relationships.” Her words were hitting Anthony forcefully, completely overwhelming him. “You should try giving yourself a chance.”

“I don’t think I can.”

“You are standing in your own way. Why is that?”

He was getting really sick of all these questions.

“Kate deserves better.”

His therapist raised her eyebrow slightly, “Isn’t that for Kate to decide?”

Anthony had no response to that.

“Anthony, we have absolutely no control over what could happen in the future. Our fears will still exist in the past, present and future. What we can try to control is now. Good and bad things happen everyday. Nothing also happens everyday. Nothing sounds quite exhausting, don’t you think?”

“Sometimes it is easier to do nothing. Sometimes, we have to take a chance on the good or bad things happening,” She told him, smiling softly at him. “Sometimes, we just need to take that chance.”

Something just clicked.

He had to take that chance.

“I have to go,” Anthony jumped up, running a hand through his hair and slightly waving the other one around. “I have to talk to Kate. If she’ll talk to me, I’ll take that chance. Right? Right. Yes. Wow. Okay. Thank you, doctor. Thank you-”

“I’ll have my assistant book you in for an appointment next week,” His therapist responded, a slight smile on her face as she stood up to open the door for him. “Good luck, Anthony.”

Colin and Benedict stood up as Anthony walked into the waiting room, curious expressions on their faces.

“I have to tell Kate I’m in love with her.”

Anthony glanced down at his phone, which began buzzing his hand. Edwina’s name flashed on his screen.

Anthony answered the call, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. Maybe it was Kate. Maybe she had lost her phone and that’s why she hadn’t been in contact with him last night. “Edwina?”

“Anthony,” Edwina’s shaky voice spoke through the phone, sending cold shivers down Anthony’s spine. “It’s Kate.”

Anthony had burst through the hospital doors, running up stairs and through doors until he found the room Kate was in after multiple directions from nurses, Colin and Benedict hot on his heels.

Edwina had reassured him that Kate was fine. Her brain scans and other injuries had come back completely clear, the worst thing that had happened was her leg had been broken.

He had to see her. He had to see her alive and breathing. He had to make sure she was okay.

“Kate.”

Anthony had never felt so nauseous and anxious in his entire life.

“Are you okay?”

Kate was there, sitting up in her hospital bed with her casted leg elevated in the air. She didn’t appear to have any other injuries, her dark hair was in a bun on the top of her head and she did have some scrapes and bruises along her arms, and a tiny scratch on her cheek.

“That's none of your business.”

That was the response he expected and it hurt just as he expected. He did deserve it.

“Kate was skating in Hyde Park when a cyclist ran into her, and she landed on her leg," Edwina explained carefully, anxiously glancing between Anthony and Kate. Benedict and Colin were behind Anthony, smiling awkwardly at everyone in the room and shooting a relieved expression at Kate. She smiled back at them, at least she wasn't icing them out.

Kate just refused to look at Anthony. “Get out.”

“We’re going to get some coffee in the canteen.” said Mary, beginning to drag an anxious looking Edwina out of the hospital room.

“Don’t you dare,” Kate snapped, raising her voice at her mother and sister. She pointed at the chairs they just vacated. “Anthony is the only one who will be leaving this hospital room.”

What did he expect? She had every right to be furious with him. It wasn't going to be easy and he would do whatever it took to fix this. To fix them. “I’ll wait in the waiting room until you want to talk.”

“I don’t want to talk.”

He nodded, making his way towards the doorway he had only come through. He knew Kate and pushing her wasn’t going to achieve anything. He had fucked up and he had to fix it in the way she wanted him to. “I’ll just be waiting then.”

And waited, he did.

He waited for two weeks until Kate was released from the hospital.

He tried everything. He had taken the time off work to be there during visiting hours, waiting for her to finally let him speak to her. He had drafted about fifty different speeches before she was released, thinking about everything he had spoken about with his therapist. He went to two more sessions during Kate’s stay and he felt something was really changing.

Except for Kate’s willingness to speak to him.

When he knocked on her door, she told him to get lost. When he brought her flowers, she threw them at him. When he brought her food, she wouldn’t touch it. She ignored his texts and calls.

She had every right to make him suffer and she was doing a superb job at it.

He spent his time on business calls or chatting with whoever was visiting Kate. Every Bridgerton but Anthony had been allowed in. He got to know her nurses and doctors, getting updates on Kate’s progress and asking them questions about her leg and the healing process.

Mary sat beside Anthony in the waiting room one afternoon, handing him a cup of coffee. “Thank you.”

“I started worrying less, you know.”

Anthony turns to look at Mary, frowning in confusion.

“Kate is a very good person. She takes care of people. She took care of Edwina and I more than she should have, especially after my husband died.” A sad expression appeared on her face. “My husband always said Kate tried to take care of him when her mother passed away. She was four years old.”

He smiled sadly, taking a small sip of his coffee. “That sounds like Kate.”

“It does, doesn’t it?” Mary nodded her head, wrapping her hands around her coffee cup. “I always wanted that for her. Someone who would take care of her and she would let them. I wasn’t so sure it would ever happen until she brought you home.”

Anthony blinked at Mary, completely taken aback. He had known Mary for eight years now and they had spent a good bit of time together, but he couldn’t remember ever speaking to her alone. Especially like this.

“I knew she finally had someone to take care of her. You’ve been so good to her.”

“I don’t know if she’ll forgive me this time Mary,” Anthony said, his voice croaky as he hung his head low. “I don’t know if I deserve to be forgiven.”

“Kate didn’t talk to her father and I for two weeks because we didn’t let her go to an Eminem concert when she was twelve years old,” Mary said, chuckling softly at the fond memory. “She will come around.”

“We all make mistakes, Anthony. I don’t know what happened between you two,” Mary said softly, reaching over to squeeze his hands. “I do know you’ll be able to fix yours.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Kate,” Edwina said, exhaustion flooding her voice as she pushed Kate’s wheelchair to a stop in front of the exit of the hospital. “Anthony’s car is the only car big enough to bring you home! You’re meant to lie across the back seat.”

Kate was glaring at Anthony with such an intensity, he was genuinely terrified. She was absolutely furious at the prospect of Anthony driving her home. “I’d rather walk.”

“I suppose you should have thought about that before you went skating on those death traps,” Anthony said, deciding that if she wouldn’t talk to him, he might be able to at least get an insult if he winded her up. Then, she would technically have spoken to him. “Hop on in.”

Kate’s mouth dropped open as she watched Anthony open up his back door, which had been filled with blankets and pillows to help Kate get comfortable. She knew she had no choice. The two nurses helped Kate into the backseat, buckling her in as Edwina got into Anthony’s car. Mary was following them home.

Kate, furious about recent events, was sulking in the back seat.

Edwina and Sophie hadn’t been overly kind to Anthony the first week after Kate’s accident. He didn’t blame them, he deserved every single bit of slack he got for what he’d done. They had eased up on him the last week, probably out of pure pity as he desperately tried to fix things with Kate who so far wanted nothing to do with him.

They finished their awkward car ride once Anthony parked in Kate’s flat’s underground car park. Now the fun really began. He would make himself useful in any way he could to help Kate, so Edwina and Mary had asked him to drive her home once he had offered.

“Kate,” Edwina said slowly, clearly nervous about what she was about to say as she opened her sister’s door. “Mum and I aren’t strong enough to get you out of the car.”

“Whose side are you on?” Kate snapped, realizing exactly what was going on. “There’s not a chance in hell-”

“I am on your leg’s side!” Edwina snapped, everyone’s eyes widening as Edwina’s temper flared. It was a rare sight. “I am losing the will to live here, Kate. Just let Anthony carry you upstairs and you can do whatever you want. Throw anything you want at him for all I care. Just get upstairs.”

Anthony leaned into the back seat, carefully moving Kate and her leg towards the edge of the seat. They were so close, his arms wrapped around her. If he looked at her, he could count the freckles sprawled across her nose and cheek and how many eyelashes she had. He had done it a million times before.

Except he couldn’t.

Kate refused to look at him.

He got her out of the car until she could support herself on her crutches, making her way towards the lifts. Anthony, Edwina and Mary brought all of her bags upstairs to her flat. Anthony had stocked her fridge and cupboards with all her favourite things and had gotten it professionally cleaned yesterday. He also had about five bouquets of tulips in each room.

“Simon dropped in some food from his restaurant,” Edwina said, smiling softly as she began to unpack the bag. “Thank god. I’m starving. Anthony?”

“I’ll go.” Anthony said, shaking his head as he headed towards the door after dropping the last bag on the floor. The hope he had of fixing things with Kate was really starting to diminish. She really despised him.

She wouldn’t even look at him.

Kate waved a crutch in his direction. It was the first time she had spoken to only him directly in over two weeks. “Stop getting me tulips!”

Anthony turned around to look at her, shaking his head simply. “No.”

“We are going to go out for a walk,” Mary suggested loudly, tugging at Edwina who gaped at her mother in disbelief and then glanced back down at the food. The two Sheffields practically ran out of Kate’s flat, bag of food in their hand, and surprisingly weren’t stopped by Kate.

This was his chance.

“How are you?”

Kate’s hard glare hadn’t faded. “Why do you care?”

He visibly softened. “Of course I care.”

“I don’t think you do, actually,” Kate snapped, aggressively fluffing the pillows behind her back where she sat on her grey couch. “I thought you cared until I realized what you had done. I thought you cared until I stood there telling you I loved you and all you did was tell me that you had lied to me and how we would never work. I never expected you to love me back, what did I expect was some-”

“Are you on drugs?”

“Excuse me?” Kate’s voice was almost a shriek.

Anthony had to really stop himself from rolling his eyes. “I can’t say this if you’re in any way inebriated.”

“No,” Kate muttered, crossing her arms across her chest, “I still despise you, so I’m of sound mind.”

“I should have kissed you. That night. When we were at Aubrey Hall. Seven years ago. I should have kissed you in the lake. I should have kissed you at the Law Ball in college. I should have kissed you when we were in Spain. When we were in my dorm. Your dorm. In the morning. In the afternoon. In the evening. There were so many times where I should have kissed you, Kate.”

“You did kiss me,” Kate spat out, tears flooding her eyes that made Anthony’s chest clench. “You kissed me and you pretended that you didn’t remember.”

“I’m an idiot. I’m a fool. There’s no rational explanation for why I did it. I was so scared of losing you, Kate. But I lost you anyway. I’ll never be more sorry for that, Kate.” Anthony took a few tentative steps towards her, crouching down so he was at her eye level. “I’m so sorry for hurting you. Please, just listen to me. I’ll leave you alone afterwards if that’s what you want.”

“I was on my way to yours when Edwina rang me,” Anthony said, trying to remember everything he had wanted to say and had written down so many times. “I was on my way to tell you I was in love with you. I was an asshole, the night of the gallery. A complete asshole. I panicked. I saw everything on that bloody picture that I have wanted and dreamed of for years, and I panicked. I was so scared of losing what we had that I was too scared to take the chance on having something more.”

Kate stared at him with her wide brown eyes, the ones he had missed so bloody much. He had missed everything about her and now he was here and he was trying. He was desperately trying and he had no idea if it would be enough. “What are you trying to say, Anthony?”

“I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since I was nineteen years old. I’ve denied it and denied it, because I’m screwed up, and I know you deserve better than me, but it's always been you Kate. It will always be you. I was terrified of screwing things up and losing you because I can’t live without you Kate. I don’t ever want to. You’re my best friend. You’re my person.”

“When I heard you were hurt and there was a chance that I could lose you-I can’t fathom life without you, Kate.” Anthony’s voice broke off as he spoke, his voice choking on air. “I can’t. I don’t want to. All I want is you, Kate. I’ll do anything to prove that to you. I’m all in. If you’ll have me.”

“Why do you get to decide?”

Anthony blinked at her through his watery eyes, hastily wiping them. He had finally said everything he wanted to say and the biggest weight had been taken off his chest. The anxiety of waiting on Kate’s response still clawed at him. “What?”

“Why do you get to decide that I deserve better than you?” Kate asked, narrowing her eyes as she looked at him.

“I don’t know,” He answered honestly, shaking his head as he leaned against the couch. “It wasn’t that I decided. It was just so obvious to me. You deserve everything, Kate. Everything. That isn’t me. All I can do is try-”

“No.”

His heart stopped in his chest, a rigid stance completely taken over. Was this it? Was Kate ending things forever? Has he lost for her good?

“You should have asked me.”

Anthony couldn’t help the sigh of relief that came out of him. “I know.”

“I’ve always been smarter than you.”

He smiled softly, nodding his head. “That’s debatable.”

“Do you always have to have an answer for everything?” She asked, completely exasperated, but there wasn’t any annoyance detected in her tone. It was almost teasing.

“I suppose,” He said slowly, his eyes never moving off hers. “Some things never changed.”

“No,” She said softly, her eyes moving around his face. “They really don’t.”

“I should have asked you too,” Kate added a few seconds later, visibly gulping as she pushed some of the loose strands of hair in front of her face behind her ears.

“I’m still so mad at you,” She murmured, blinking away a few tears that rolled down her red cheeks. “I’m so mad. I’m not going to suddenly stop being mad because you’re in love with me and I’m in love with you. We’re going to have to work at this. It isn’t going to be easy.”

“I deserve it.” He nodded in agreement, not being able to stop the small smile breaking out on his face as she said she loved him. “I know. I’ll do anything, Kate. Anything.”

She loved him.

She loved him.

Kate was in love with him.

“Hold my hand.” She murmured, extending her fingers towards him. Their fingers interlock smoothly, her soft, petite palm and his large, rougher hand against each other.

“If you had asked me,” Kate said, her voice coming out wobbly as she spoke. “I would have told you that you’re it for me. It’s always been you. From the moment I met you, it was always going to be you. I didn’t stand a chance. It’s not about deserving, Anthony. It’s about being there for someone no matter what. You’ve always been there for me. And I always want you to be.”

Their faces were extremely close now. He could smell her again, that soft scene of lilies and soap that he had missed so much. He could count the freckles on her cheek and her long, delicate eyelashes. His lips are “I’m sorry it took me so long.”

“Us,” Kate corrected him, her breathing small and shallow. “It only took us eight years.”

“This isn’t how I imagined it.”

“I’m so tired of imagining, aren’t you?”

He kisses her.

It’s better than he’s ever imagined it.

Why?

Because it’s real.

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

Comfort (wonho)

A/n: A sweet little commission!

Summary: Hoseok hadn’t planned on falling for you, but here he was, waiting for you just so he can comfort you.

Warnings: none, just fluff and a titch of angst, mention of last year’s debacle but no detail

Word Count: 1068

“Jagiya?”

His voice is soft and low when he calls you and you squeeze your eyes shut against the tears that burn behind them.

“I just need a minute,” you say, and it comes out harsher than you’d intended.

You’d been dating only a few months, and you didn’t want to take out all your frustrations on him. Sometimes you felt like you did everything yourself, as if you had no one to help you or comfort you. Today had just been one of those days, where everything had gone wrong and every fault seemed to fall on you. 

Hoseok is so sweet to you, you’d never want to bark at him because of something small like this and hurt his feelings, so when he comes over as always for your Friday night date, you hole yourself up in the bathroom when he asks about your day.

You’d tried to be what you thought he wanted, what all guys wanted, anyway, just a good time, fun and flirty. You’d liked him so much the first night you met him that the two of you talked all night.

You’d told him all about your new apartment and the kitten you’d gotten and he’d smiled wide and asked, “What if I come over and meet her on Friday?”

Ever since then, like clockwork, he’s at your apartment every Friday, making a point to greet Nix, your little black kitten, first, before kissing you. 

You haven’t had a really bad Friday before, and although you’d had bad days before, you’d been able to deflect them easily through text or on the phone. With him here, though, you know he’d see it on your face. He’s always so good at reading you.

You wish you could read him as well, you wish you knew exactly what you were….but he’s sweet and friendly to everyone, and the hot and hungry kisses you’d shared on your couch don’t mean that you’re his one and only.

Hoseok’s hand pauses at the door of the bathroom. He’s trying to give you space, can see that you haven’t had the best day the second he asked you about it and you excused yourself. He’d think you were sick if it weren’t for the way your lip trembled when he asked about your day, and now he stands outside the door, contemplating what to do.

Jagiya,” he says again, more softly. “Come out and tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong,” you call back, but he can hear the quiver in your voice.

Your bathroom is through your bedroom so he sits down on your bed, waiting. 

He’d never been in your bedroom other than to go to the bathroom even through the few months you’d been seeing each other. He was fine with you wanting to take things slow, although he has to admit to himself that he hadn't expected this, hadn't expected more than a fling from you or anyone.

After the mess that had happened last year, you'd been there, been there for him in a way that no one else had been, and he hadn't ever imagined giving his heart away again but here he was, unable to move from watching the bathroom doorway because he knows you need him. You'd only been friends then, it was before he ever kissed you but yet you'd listened when he raged and held him when he cried and he can't leave you now.

He's quiet, hands folded, and when you come out you startle a little, as if you'd expected him to go.

"Hoseok, you don't have to-"

Hoseok doesn't let you finish, reaches out and grabs you around the waist, pulls you to him, turning his face into your stomach. 

"I'm here for you," he mumbles, muffled by your shirt.

He feels you trembling, trying not to cry, and he pulls you down into his lap. He doesn't force you, you go limp in his arms the second he touches your shoulders. He even has to pull your knees around his waist, put your head down on his shoulder as your body shakes with sobs.

He runs tight circles on your back, fights his own tears because now is not the time to be an empath, because you need him like he'd needed you before.

He starts to rock you back and forth gently, humming some half written song into your ear, and eventually you quiet.

He brushes your hair behind your ear where it's fallen free.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

You whimper in response. "I got your shirt wet."

That makes him laugh, makes his heart feel lighter. "I can always take it off."

You hit at his shoulder weakly. "Always an excuse."

Hoseok figures if you're teasing him, whatever happened must not be too horrible and you're feeling better. Sure enough when you lift your head there's a ghost of a smile on your face.

He thumbs the corner of your lips. "You look pretty when you smile."

You scoff, sniffling and wiping your eyes. "I look a mess. Didn't want you to see me this way."

He frowns. "Why not?"

You duck your head then, embarrassed.

"Because I like you," you murmur, barely audible, but it makes his heart gallop in his chest.

There's fear, at first, this split second feeling of oh shit, not again, because he hasn't had the most luck when he's let himself fall. But he loves the upturned corner of your mouth already, loves the curve of your jaw, watches it when you speak and if he thinks about it long enough, he's been in over his head for weeks, maybe months.

"I like you too," he manages, even though it comes out hoarse and strained.

"Don't sound so enthusiastic," you reply, deadpan, and it makes him laugh again, loud and open.

His arms are loose around you but he hugs you tight when you make him laugh, kisses that lovely upturned corner of your mouth.

"I like you happy or sad, jagiya," he whispers against your ear. It's easier to say this way, not looking at you, his heart pounding hard against his chest plate.

He feels rather than sees your upturned mouth when you press it against his, and he thinks maybe this isn't so scary after all, maybe there's comfort in it instead of just fear.

[geeks-universe]

Veritas Vos Liberabit

The truth will set you free.

Next Part

A/N: This is part one. There won’t be too many parts, so expect like max 15. And yes, this is a Lucifer/Sherlock crossover.

For the first time, you felt absolutely free.

Your father was in Los Angeles, far away from your newfound home in London. Well, temporary, you were sure.

While your freedom was certainly enjoyable, you felt a twinge of guilt for leaving your father without a proper goodbye. However, you knew if you said goodbye, he’d convince you to stay. He was always good at that sort of thing.

You loved him, you truly did, but he treated you like a child. Which, yes, compared to his age you were most definitely a child, but he was forgetting that you weren’t like him.

Well, not entirely like him at least.

Besides, London was giving you a chance to experience life like a normal person. You’d spent so many years hidden away from the world, you’d barely had time to actually live your life.

Your father told you it was for your safety, which was fair enough considering the amount of enemies he had, but you still needed to experience life while you could. You knew deep down your father wouldn’t understand, even if he tried.

You sighed, looking on the city with a sense of trepidation. You’d been living in Los Angeles for a while now, but you’d had your father with you. This time you were completely alone in one very large city.

You shook your head, facing the door next to the home you’d decided to rent. You lifted your hand to knock, but as you did somebody opened the door.

“You were taking too long,” the man stated, his eyes narrowed as he looked you up and down.

It was analytic, you could tell. Considering who your father was, you tended to attract stares everywhere you went, just as he did. Something he once said floated back into your mind.

“Humans tend to have an affinity for the divine. It’s… desirable.”

This was different though. He was scanning you, looking for answers by observing. It was unsettling, to say the least.

“Okay, um, hi.” You raised a brow.

“American?” He inquired, leaning in a titch more. He smelled all around your collarbone before stepping back.

“Something like that,” you muttered, “can you quit with the,” you gestured vaguely.

“Yes, right, what’s your case?” He asked, leaving the doorway to head up the stairs. Curiously, you followed him up.

“I don’t have one,” you replied, “I’m here for the apartment next door. I wanted to introduce myself.”

“Ah, yes, the new neighbor,” he said, “delightful.”

“Who are you bugging now, Sherlock?” A new voice questioned from the room just beyond the stairs.

“We’ve got a new neighbor,” Sherlock introduced, ushering you into the room.

It was a bit messy, but in a way you knew the inhabitants could easily navigate through it. The man that Sherlock was talking to was sitting in a chair, setting a paper aside so he could properly introduce himself.

You took notice of the damn blink that everybody did, usually right before they try to charm the wits off you. It was all too familiar, and annoyingly comforting in a weird way. It made you feel closer to your dad.

“Hi,” he breathed, “I’m John Watson.”

You smiled politely, holding your hand out for him to shake. He did so, though you noted that his touch lingered longer than acceptable.

“Right,” Sherlock drawled, watching his friend closely.

“I’m (Y/N),” you introduced yourself.

“You’re from America,” John concluded.

Once more, you let that tidbit of information slide by. If they wanted to believe you were from America, so be it. It was easier to explain than where you were actually from.

“I hope that’s not a problem,” you laughed awkwardly.

To be quite honest, there were still many things you felt entirely trivial about. One of those things just happened to include the rest of the world besides Los Angeles, considering you’d never been.

“Not at all,” John assured you with a friendly smile.

You let out a relieved sigh.

“Glad to hear,” you mumbled, looking from one occupant to the next. “I just figured I’d stop to say hi and, uh, if-“

“Why did you choose here?”

Sherlock interrupted you, still scrutinizing your every move. If you hadn’t been so taken off guard, you may have laughed.

“I’m sorry?”

“You’ve got a lot of money from your…” he leaned forward an inch, his eyes flicking down to your hand, then back to your face, “father. Could’ve had any flat in London and you chose here. Why?”

“Uh, I-“

“Nervous, but happy,” he paused thoughtfully, “running from home? First time outside of America. No, even more, first time outside of home. Where is it? A city, has to be. You’re fine wi-“

“Stop that.”

John was quick to stop Sherlock’s tirade, an apology in his expression and a hand on his friend’s shoulder that was meant to shut him up.

“Quite the mind reader,” you joked weakly, chuckling nervously. For your sake, you seriously hoped he wasn’t. Humans couldn’t be, but you could never be too sure on what creatures lurked about, especially outside of the comfortable corner of the world your father carved out for you.

“Observation,” he corrected, and you nearly breathed a sigh of relief before deciding that doing so would be far too suspicious.

“He’s quite good at it, and won’t let you forget it anytime soon.”

You smiled politely to John. Of the two, he was the more familiar one. You had met so many different kinds of people during your stay in Los Angeles, and none had been able to pick apart your character by way of observation.

“I’m from Los Angeles,” you supplied.

Sherlock clicked his tongue, as if that had been one of the cities he’d narrowed the list to. Basing his ability solely off of the brief interaction you’ve had with him thus far, you wouldn’t be surprised if it was.

“I’m not running from home, exactly.” You shrugged, a half smile on your lips. “I am an adult anyways, not like it’s illegal. I just wanted to see more of the world, explore life outside of home.”

Sherlock hummed to himself, like he was trying to piece you together and he had managed to click that extra bit of information into a slot. John, on the other hand, seemed to find your response endearing.

Unlike Sherlock, he wasn’t analyzing your every word and move. He was taking what you said at face value, and empathizing with your story. 

“Never been to Los Angeles myself,” John cleared his throat, hoping to continue the small talk.

“You should, it’s an interesting city,” you offered a genuine smile, ignoring the twinge of longing. You really did love Los Angeles, and being away from home hurt just as badly as it felt good. “If you ever do find yourself there, stop by Lux. My father owns it.”

“So I was right,” Sherlock muttered, “rich family. Old money or new?”

Your expression turned to something decidedly mischievous.

“To be quite honest, my family has never really needed money.”

If Sherlock was confused by your statement, he made no effort to show it. The brief furrow of John’s brow was the only evidence you’d even spoken your words aloud.

“Anyways, I just wanted to introduce myself. My door is always open if you need it.”

“Likewise,” John said kindly, a soft twinkle in his gaze. The exchange was interrupted by Sherlock’s annoyed huff.

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous John, the door is locked quite often. As should yours, London can be a rather dangerous place.”

“Unfortunately for London, so can I,” you joked lightly, tugging at the chain around your neck. It had become something of a reminder of home.

On it was a gift from your father, something to carry with you so you can always remember him. A promise, really.

See, Lucifer wasn’t your father in the biblical sense. (The irony.) He raised you, but you were, by all rights, his baby sister. (Emphasis on baby, you’d only been kicking for 22 years.) Instead of being raised in the Silver City, you had been left at the gates of Hell, without a word of explanation. While Lucifer hadn’t asked, nor wanted, the newfound paternal responsibility, he assumed the role with minimal complaints.

If you were being honest, he was an amazing father. He had allowed you to flourish and be the person you wanted to be, not the vision he had for you. However, he had a tendency to be overzealous and project his fears onto you. He was worried the whole world was against him, and if he weren’t there to protect you, then you’d be taken from him.

The concept seemed ridiculous to you, considering you were 22 years old and had never had so much as a scraped knee, but he was adamant. Thus, the only way to escape his watchful eye and truly experience life- if only for a little while- was to leave.

“I can give you my number,” John suggested, quickly backtracking as soon as he realized what his words implied. “If you- I mean, so you can let me know if you need anything.”

Your smile was wide as you handed him your phone. Truth be told, outside of the few close confidants you had in Los Angeles, there were few people you’d had the chance to really get to know. John and Sherlock seemed like nice enough people, and they were going to be your neighbors for the time being.

He typed his number in quickly, as Sherlock watched the interaction curiously. There was something in the way he observed that had you smiling. The staring was familiar territory, but the intent was different.

“I suppose,” John began, handing you back your phone with the utmost care.

He exchanged a glance with his roommate before rocking on his feet.

“We work odd jobs so there may be some noises…”

You quirked an amused brow. They seemed a fair bit more interesting than you were expecting. You waved off his worry.

“I survived living with my father for as long as I did, I promise it can’t get any weirder or noisier than that.”

The look John gave you made you think he definitely thought it could, but he didn't voice any more concerns. Instead, he gave you a gentle goodbye and walked you back to the door of your actual apartment. Sherlock hadn’t bothered to come, even though you were almost hoping he would.

There was something peculiar about him, and you wished to have more time to evaluate just what that was, but in the meantime you were left alone to your devices.

Once John had left, you found yourself leaning back against the door to look at the bare interior of your new home. The thumping of your heart slowed to a near standstill as you took in the wooden floors and the brick walls. It wasn’t overly fancy, like what your father owned, but it was yours. (Well, you were renting it, but the fact still remained.)

Tears filled your eyes, and you couldn’t quite understand why. The aching in your chest was rivaled by the freedom in your veins. You’d never really had the opportunity to answer the question of who you were. It’d always been what your father thought best, or what you could do to help him. Now, nobody would tell you what to do, or how to decorate your new apartment, or who you could befriend. However, your father wouldn’t be there to tell you everything would be okay, or remind you how very important you were to him, or how capable you were. 

Freedom had never tasted so bittersweet.

“Decorating tomorrow,” you told the empty space, a small smile on your lips.

For tonight, you’d continue to be the person who left your home in Los Angeles to start over in London. You’d be the one who ran from home to discover a life out from under the man who had raised you.

Tomorrow, though, you’d finally start the journey of figuring out who you were.

It’d start with furniture. Then a job maybe, some friends, a hobby…

The options were endless, and you found yourself buzzing with the opportunity to discover what would make you happy.

[be-your-fantasy]

~ Surprise ~

Reader x SF9 Zuho (Married) feat. special guest Huru <3 Genre: Super soft fluff, a titch of angst. Summary: You and Juho have been trying to grow your little family for a while now and it’s not been easy, but finally the time has come to surprise him and you decide to recruit your favourite furry baby to deliver the news. Warnings: Mention of trouble conceiving. Word Count: 1.1k Requested by the wonderful @wordsicantsayforyou​ ~ You stared at the tiny window on the pregnancy test in hand for what felt like forever, it never truly felt like 3 minutes, more like an eternity. You debated not even taking one today since you could barely stand to look at yet another negative pregnancy test. You’d lost count of the number of tests you’d taken before now, the doctors visits, the nights you cried quietly in bed wondering what was going wrong while your husband Juho held you to his chest tightly. He would gently stroke your back and place sweet kisses on your forehead, whispering how much he loved you and providing the reassurance you needed. You heard the bathroom door behind you creak open as Huru pushed the door to get inside, he walked up to you and rubbed his body against your legs, waiting for you to give him the attention he wanted. You set down the test to pick him up and cradle him in your arms like the big furry baby he is, he could tell when you were nervous or upset, when he sensed this he always glued himself like a magnet to you. You sat on the bathroom floor with him in your arms, a very welcome distraction while you waited. Suddenly your attention was drawn away from Huru, the timer you’d set on your phone went off.  “Should we look?” You said to Huru, tilting your head to the side while looking deep into his golden eyes? He responded with a soft pat to your nose with his paw. You reached up to the counter behind you and grabbed the test, closing your eyes until it was right before you.

Pregnant. You froze, almost in disbelief. You just slowly blinked at the small screen that read the word you had wanted for so long. The emotions quickly came crashing down on you and all you could do was cry, tears of joy. Finally. You buried your face in Hurus soft belly, listening to his rhythmic purrs as the tears just kept coming. Juho was at his studio right now and you wanted so badly to call him and practically scream the news at him through the phone, but one thought that you’d played with recently was surprising him when you finally were pregnant. You had come up with a few ideas and purchased a few possibilities before stashing them away around the apartment so he wouldn’t find them. The longer it took the more and more you wanted to make a big deal of it. It wouldn’t be any fun to tell him when he wasn’t home anyway you thought to yourself when once again your attention was stolen by the noise coming from your phone. The screen lit up with Juhos handsome face and a new text. JuJu <3 Just finished up, I’ll be home in about 10 minutes jagiya. Panic. You now had just 10 minutes to get ready and finalize a plan before the man of the hour walked through the front door. You knew Juho would know something was up right away if you didn’t tell him today, your bright smile and puffy eyes would give you away immediately! You looked down at the furry companion in your arms and the light bulb could practically be seen above your head, Huru was both yours and Juhos first baby and you wanted him to be included in the momentous occasion. Huru looked at you quizzically as you set him down and darted for the bedroom closet. You started pulling boxes down from the shelf, you knew you hid it among the christmas decorations... but which box? You figured that the christmas boxes was the safest location to hide things from Juho since he is rarely ever rummaging around in them, and it was currently still summer, but you hadn’t figured on outsmarting your future self. After a few stressful minutes you finally found what you were looking for, you pulled out the little shirt from all the tinsel, it was a shirt meant for Huru to wear. You flipped it over and read the back, ‘Soon to be Big Brother’ was written in bold letters. Was it cheesy? Yes, but you knew he would find it cute and that’s all that mattered. Next was to wrangle Huru into wearing it. You looked at your watch and you had just a few minutes left give or take. Thankfully Huru was still close by, now playing with the Christmas decorations that were strewn all over the floor, you pulled the shirt over his head, much to his protest. You headed back to the bathroom with Huru in your arms and quickly pocketed the positive test just as you heard the code being entered in the front door. You peeked your head around the corner to watch Juho walk into the apartment, setting his bag down by the front door. “Jagi, I’m home” You set Huru down so that he could greet Juho ahead of you, as expected he sauntered over to Juho and started rubbing on his leg as he usually did. “Well hello Huru-ya...” His sentence trailing off as he tilted his head to better look at the new shirt Huru was wearing. While he was looking down you quietly approached, test in hand behind your back. Juho finally noticed you approaching and looked up with a curious expression, but when he saw your face, it clicked. His body didn’t move, he just looked at your for a moment completely still. You could see his eyes glistening as he said: “Are you pregnant?” You brought the test out from behind your back and showed it proudly, tears once again began to flow from your eyes. Juho very quickly closed the distance between you and wrapped you in his embrace. “Y/N I love you so much.”  You could hear his voice catch in his throat as he experienced the same wave of emotions that you had experienced not 20 minutes earlier. He pulled back slightly to place one of his hands behind your head and pull you in for a deep kiss. When you pulled away to look at his face he had the most radiant smile from ear to ear, his eyes brimming with happy tears.  Juho quickly placed one hand behind your thigh and the other under your butt as he lifted you up, guiding your legs to wrap around him as he carried you to the bedroom. You both wanted to tell your closest loved ones as soon as you could, but you both also wanted to bask in this new joy for as long as you could, just the two of you plus big brother Huru <3 ~ This one really hit close to home, I hope you enjoyed and have a lovely day <3

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Riding High Ch 12: I L Y

Chapter Summary: Its Christmas…and we reach the end of a stressful year for Frank…but as he looks back he realises, it ain’t all been that bad.

Chapter Warnings: Bad Language words. Talks of SMUT but nothing major

Chapter Pairings:  Frank Adler x OFC Fliss Gallagher

A/N: Yeah yeah I know it’s the wrong time of year but hell, we’re all on lock down so the days and months don’t actually exist anyway at the moment… so let’s pretend its CHRISTMAS!!!

As always I’m a ho for a REBLOG and COMMENT! This is the end of Part 1 of Riding High! Thank you all for sticking with me and loving FRISS ( yeah I went there, eat your heart out Kimye…) as much as I do! Part 2 will see us jump forwards few months into 2018 and I have BIG things planned for our duo

Thank you, thank you, thank you to my wing-woman @icanfeelastormbrewing​ for letting me bounce the ideas, proof reading and finding me appropriate photos of our man. You can thank her the picture in the top left corner here…yeah, it made me thirsty too

Chapter Song:  Fairytale of New York by the Pogues

Series Masterlist  Main Masterlist 

I kept them with me babe, and put them with my own. Can’t do it all alone, I built my dreams around you.

Frank looked up as Fliss walked into her parent’s kitchen and his mouth dropped open. She was dressed in a gorgeous long legged strapless jumpsuit along which the neckline was embellished with lace flowers which spread down the sheer sleeves. Her long hair was styled in loose curls and she’d done something to her make up that made her cheek bones stand out even more. Her eyelids were adorned with a deep green that shimmered and made her dark eyes pop and she had a clear gloss on her plump lips. Fuck, she looked stunning. But as he watched, he saw her face fall and she bit her lip.

“Is it…is it not ok?” she asked shyly “I can change…I mean…”

“Don’t you dare.” he said sternly, stepping forward, his hands falling to her hips “Honey, you look amazing.”

Her face lit up and she smiled at him, shyly “I wasn’t sure how posh to go or…” "Lissy…” he chuckled “Stop it.”

“Sorry.” she said, wrinkling her nose. She stepped back slightly and looked him up and down, taking in his dark jeans, boots and light denim button down. “You look pretty good too Sailor.” she smiled, running her hands up his chest to his shoulder and he noticed then she was also wearing her Pandora. He smiled back, his eyes also spotting that her neck was bare and then had the perfect idea for a final Christmas Gift he had been struggling to come up with. With a soft smile he leaned down, taking in that she was slightly taller than usual thanks to her heels and he pressed a gentle kiss to her mouth.

“Get a room…” Bill shot as he walked into the kitchen, Mary in tow.

“Bore off.” Fliss shot back, looking at her dad as he sent her a grin before he did a double take.

“Wow, you look cracking Titch.”

“Thanks” she smiled

“You ready to go?”

“Sure you don’t mind dropping us?” Frank turned to look at Bill “It’s no problem to get a cab.”

“Nonsense.” Bill smiled “I gotta pick up the Thai V has ordered anyway.”

“You’re getting Thai?” Frank raised an eyebrow and glanced at Mary “Funny that just so happens to be your favourite…”

She shrugged “Verity asked what I wanted for dinner.”

Frank sighed and looked at Bill “You spoil her.”

Bill shrugged “And?”

Frank rolled his eyes a soft smile playing on his face. The way that Bill and Verity had welcomed Mary, and him for that matter, into their lives still amazed him. Whilst he and Fliss had only been officially together four weeks or so now, they’d opened their doors to him the day they had met pretty much back in August and he was eternally grateful. Mary got a sense of family, something he had wanted her to have all her life. It had even been brought up at the Court Hearing earlier that week where the paperwork had been signed awarding him legal guardianship status, the woman from the Child services department commenting in the court room that Mary had been gushing about Bill, Verity and Fliss, and seemed extremely settled. Frank was simply relieved all of it was more or less over. The last 2 weeks had been stressful as Greg had been handling the main discussions with the state for him and when they’d sat down one night to go over the notes for the settlement they had proposed, Greg told Frank that 2 major conditions would be set. Firstly that he found a home to allow Mary a room of her own and secondly that she was given access to a higher, more challenging form of education. After a bit of discussion with Mary, who had insisted she didn’t want to go to a posh school, Greg had done a little research into previous cases and come up with a suggestion that Child Services agreed with. They would provide a scholarship grant that would allow Mary to attend a number of University classes a few days a week and then her normal school the rest. It was a middle ground, giving Mary the mental stimulation she needed but also allowing her to be a normal kid. It was agreed she would return to normal school when term started in January and the arrangements would be made with the University to start there when their term picked up the middle of the same month. Frank had insisted that she wouldn’t be taking any exams or anything like that, just doing the work, keeping herself occupied. The judge had accepted the proposal, giving Frank 6 months to find alternative living arrangements, and had then awarded the Guardianship temporarily with the instruction it be awarded permanently upon a review in 6 months. So whilst not 100% complete, it was almost there, and Frank knew that as long as he did what they said, there would be no problem. The other good thing was nothing had legally been awarded to Evelyn, after she had remained completely absent from the proceedings. Which meant that if she did reach out, Frank would have total control over where and how often contact took place. Which suited him fine as he could ensure it was on Mary’s terms completely.

“Hey…you ok?” Fliss asked, rubbing his arm. He jerked round, realising he had been completely elsewhere and gave her a smile.

“Yeah, sorry, was just thinking.”

“Did it hurt?” Mary asked and Frank shot her a look as Fliss and Bill laughed as Mary left with the drink she had come in to the kitchen for.

Frank followed her into the living room as she perched on the large sofa next to Verity, the pair of them looking at something on the laptop.

“Behave.” Frank looked at Mary. “Go to bed when V and Bill tell you, no back chat or arguing…”

She saluted him and V looked up smiling. “Stop fussing Frank, she’s never any trouble.” Frank nodded and then headed out to Bill’s Range Rover catching Fliss up.

“You do realise she’s gonna be up until midnight, pigging out on junk and watching movies right?” Fliss said as he reached her side, looping an arm round her waist.

“Yup.” Frank said “But she’s staying over there and not in the Annex, which means she’ll wake them up at stupid AM in the morning after no sleep and not us so I don’t much care…”

A little while later Frank guided her into Bongos Beach Bar and over to a booth at the far side. Fliss smiled as she recognised Greg, and Frank introduced her to his wife Zara, then his friend Jake and his fiancée Lisa. Finally she smiled at Simon who then excused himself heading off to meet his date at the door.

“Date?” Frank raised an eyebrow

“Yeah he’s been seeing her for about 3 weeks.” Zara supplied “He invited her tonight…”

“Ah, he’s back.” Greg nodded over Frank’s shoulder and he and Fliss turned to see the tall blonde man walking back with a familiar face by his side.

Oh for fucks sake…

“Bonnie…” Fliss smiled at her as the woman stilled when she saw her and Frank.  

“You know each other?” Simon asked, frowning slightly.

“Yeah, errr…” Frank began, wondering how the hell he was going to get out of this when Fliss spoke up.

“Bonnie is, was, still is I suppose, Mary’s teacher.” Bonnie shot her a grateful look and Fliss simply smiled as Simon made a noise of comprehension.

"I should have twigged!” he said, as they both took a seat at the booth. Zara handed out a few glasses of prosecco from the bottle that sat on the table to Bonnie and Fliss who both thanked her, the men grabbing a beer from the bucket.

“Thank you.” Frank whispered into Fliss’ ear as she turned to look at him. “I didn’t know he was seeing her, or that she was gonna be here, I promise…”

Fliss frowned and shrugged “It’s fine.” she said, almost as if she was puzzled as to why he was apologising. The confusion on his face must have shown as she smiled and lay her hand on his knee.

“Frank, I don’t have a problem with Bonnie. I still think it was a stupid thing to do but…” she shrugged.

He smiled at her and dropped a kiss to her cheek. “You’re fucking amazing you know that?”

“Yep…” she popped the p, grinning at him as she took a drink from her champagne glass.

Fliss kept up with the conversation, but she soon realised that as nice as they were Zara and Lisa were just not her type of people. With both their husbands having well paid jobs, as a lawyer and a bank manager, both were stay at home mums with a lot of money to spend and time on their hands. Plus they clearly spent a lot of time together so a lot of the chatter they made between themselves, leaving Fliss to simply listen.

At one point she glanced at Bonnie who was sat, nervously twisting her fingers together before she excused herself and headed over to the bathroom. Fliss gave it a few seconds before she too did the same, Frank moving so she could squeeze past him, hands falling to her hips as she went.

“Hey…” Fliss looked at Bonnie who was stood leaning on a sink. “You ok?”

“Yeah, I err, well, I don’t know about you but I feel a little out of place. I mean they’re nice enough but…“

"Kinda feels like we’re outsiders.” Fliss nodded finishing the sentence for her.

Bonnie snorted “I feel like they’re judging me a little. Like I’m a teacher…who has to work, and it’s not a great job…”

“Dude, I shovel shit for a living and Frank’s a grease monkey.” Fliss said causing Bonnie to snort. “It’s not that at all, they’re just friends and we’re…well…”

“Strangers…” Bonnie nodded.

“Exactly.” Fliss shrugged “Trust me, I’ve done the whole awkward social circle thing before, this…well, this is actually kinda nice in comparison. I met some real ass hats when I was with my ex. These guys are ok”

Bonnie smiled and then she grinned cheekily "Wanna go do tequila?”

“Fuck, yes.” Fliss nodded and they left the bathroom giggling, heading straight to the bar. Bonnie placed her order and slid a note over the bar as they both settled on a stool. Fliss glanced round to the booth where Frank was sat talking to the rest of his friends before she turned back to Bonnie who slid her a shot over. Without a word they both had their salt, downed the shot, then bit into the lemon, both grimacing and laughing as Fliss ordered another two and asked Bonnie what long drink she wanted. Turns out she was also a gin and tonic woman.

“I’m glad you and Frank ended up together.” Bonnie said, smiling at her. “It’s nice.”

“Thanks.” Fliss smiled at her. “Kinda crept up on me a little, you know? I wasn’t looking for anything but…”

“I’m glad me and him didn’t ruin it.” Bonnie said gently “That entire night was a huge mistake…I could tell the day after he regretted it.”

Fliss shrugged “Well we all do dumb shit.”

“Say that again.” Bonnie mumbled as their second shots arrived along with their gin.

“You know when he told me he’d told you it was a mistake I went mad at him.” Fliss snorted “I mean, talk about a shitty thing to say.”

“Oh that’s not the half of it, he-…” Bonnie trailed off and shook her head as she took a drink of her gin. “Forget it, doesn’t matter.”

“What?” Fliss pressed.

“Nope.” Bonnie shook her head firmly.

“You can’t just say that and not tell me!“ Fliss whined as Bonnie downed her shot, before she sighed.

"He called me by your name, twice.”

Fliss choked on her gin, her eyes wide “What, when you…”

Bonnie nodded.

“Ok, so I feel like I should be apologising…” Fliss said, “Not sure what for but…” Bonnie chuckled as Fliss shook her head and continued “How did you not rip his cock off…I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m very glad you didn’t but…”

Bonnie laughed loudly as Fliss sprinkled more salt onto her hand “It’s not a big deal, he was mortified when I told him.”

“So he should be…” Fliss said, as she picked up her tequila.

She turned to look at Frank who was now looking round the bar, questioningly. He spotted her at the bar and raised an eyebrow and she met him with a look of her own. “I’m dating an ass hole.” she said, turning back to Bonnie “He’s cute though.”

There was a pause before they both laughed, and Bonnie gestured to the empty glasses. Fliss shrugged and Bonnie, with a grin, ordered another 2 shots.

****

“So, how’s the new job Frank?” Simon looked at him and Frank smiled, taking a pull from his bottle.

“I don’t start until January.” he said, “But yeah, looking forward to it. Full time wage, benefits…what’s not to like?”

“And a boss.” Greg said, and Frank laughed.

“Well, be kinda nice not to have to think about where the next job is coming from.” he shrugged, “I still get to do what I enjoy but less stress…”

Greg, Simon and Jake all exchanged a look which Frank didn’t miss. He gave a sigh. “What?”

“Nothing…”  Jake smirked “Just watching you finally growing up is bringing a tear to my eye. I mean, you brought a girl to our Christmas gathering, the first one ever…in the history of the Circle of Truth holding Christmas gatherings…”

"Yeah, I imagine this is what it’s like waving your kid off to university.” Simon nodded.

Frank raised his middle finger at them all, causing them to laugh.

“We’re only joking.” Simon said, winking “In all seriousness, it’s nice to see.”

Frank shook his head “You make it sounds like I’m some kind of utter disaster case…”

They all paused and once again looked at each other. “Oh fuck you.” Frank snorted as they all laughed again.

“Anyone seen the ladies?” Greg said, looking around suddenly.

“Oh, I think Zara and Lisa are on the dance floor…” Jake said looking round.

Frank glanced round the bar, looking and saw that indeed they were but there was no sign of Fliss. Or Bonnie for that matter. Fliss had gone to the bathroom a while back but surely it couldn’t be that long to pee, even if you were a girl.

“Oh, looks like our girls are getting on…” Simon said, nodding with his head to the bar. Frank turned in his seat and glanced over and saw Fliss laugh at something Bonnie said, before she licked a line of salt off her hand, downed the shot, and bit into the lemon. He couldn’t decide if he was relieved or a little weirded out at how cool Fliss was around the woman he’d almost ruined his chances with her over, but as he watched her cutting loose, talking to Bonnie, the two women locked in a very friendly exchange he felt his chest warm. Fliss had openly admitted to him not long back she was a little lonely, her own friends being in England and the ones she had in Boston, well, they’d not really been her friends, more his. He supposed it was nice to see her with someone like that, even if it as one of his one night conquests. As he watched Fliss spluttered on her drink and looked at Bonnie, another exchange was had before Fliss picked up her next tequila and looked at him. He raised a questioning eyebrow but all she did was smirk and turn back to Bonnie. With a slight shrug he turned to Simon.

“Wanna join em?”

Simon nodded “Yeah, why not.”

They excused themselves from the booth and headed over. Fliss smiled as Frank slid an arm round her waist and dropped a kiss to her neck, before Simon grinned and nodded as he added another 2 tequilas to their order.

Several more shots and gins later Fliss was drunk. So was Frank. Which was the reason the two of them had ended up on the outside beach dancefloor, dancing to some random Christmas shit. It was also the reason Frank’s denim button down was now un-done revealing his white sleeveless which he had on underneath, giving Fliss a perfect view of that collar bone tattoo she loved so much. It hadn’t surprised her in the slightest when he had explained where the words were from, being a man of philosophy and all that. She also loved the reason behind his Taurus tattoo, it being Mary’s zodiac sign. Basically her sailor underneath all his bravado was a huge sentimental sap. A huge, sentimental sap whose hands were once again now cupping her ass as they moved to the music. Fliss had long given up reaching around to restore them to the bottom of her back and simply smirked to herself slightly as she looked round the dancefloor and out across the dark ocean.

“Still not right.” she murmured.

“What?”

“This…” she made an elaborate gesture with her arm and hit a guy next to her. “Whoops…sorry.” she grimaced as Frank snorted, the guy simply shrugged and carried on his way. “I mean…no snow at Christmas…”

“Yeah but, you’re outside, on a christmas dancefloor, on the beach” he shrugged “I mean it’s kinda cool…”

“Suppose…” she said, and then she paused, and Frank watched as a gorgeous grin spread across her face whilst she cocked her head to the music. It had just morphed into Fairy Tale of New York and she let out a whoop “I fucking love this one!”

There was a loud cheer from someone and suddenly the two of them were squashed together as Simon and Bonnie appeared, followed by the rest of the group and they found themselves in a circle,  arms tangled around shoulders, the girls singing the girls part and the boys singing the boys part. At one point someone dressed as Santa muscled into the middle of the group, simply giving a loud cheer before he exited and moved elsewhere, causing Fliss to snort hysterically, hanging onto Frank’s arm as she did. As the song ended, everyone belting out the last line the group descended into giggles and Frank just watched his girl. Her cheeks were flushed, hair was slightly frizzier now thanks to the humid outdoor air and she was absolutely the wrong side of wasted but god did he love that woman.

He loved her.

Frank Adler, one time self-proclaimed bachelor, king of the Friday night fucks was in love. When did that happen?

As he watched her lean in and say something to Greg who burst out laughing he realised he couldn’t pin point it. It had crept up on him, like a slow burn, a deep fire in the very core of his belly. And damned did that fire feel hot.

Frank reached for his girl and pulled her away from Greg. She stumbled slightly into his arms and she looked up at him, giggling a little and he cut her off with a deep kiss. And before he could stop himself, he blurted it out, right there in the middle of a temporary beach dancefloor.

“I love you.” If anyone else in the group had heard they were tactful enough to all turn away, pretending not to, but there’s no way they could have missed Fliss when she pulled back, a look of shock on her face which morphed into a grin and she pointed at Frank.

“Youuuu loooooveeee meeee!” she said in a sing song voice. Frank felt himself blush.

“Yeah, do you hafta announce it to the entire of South Pass?” his Boston accent dripped off his tongue. “Youuuu loooooooveeee meeee!” she said again and he groaned, pulling her closer. She leaned up so she could whisper into his ear, and damned the touch of her lips against his ear aroused him far more than was appropriate for the middle of a public dance floor.

“Wanna know a secret Sailor?” she asked. He turned his head to look at her and she smirked at him “I love you too.” Well fuck.

Despite the fact they were both trashed, they both knew this wasn’t just a heat of the moment thing. Both felt it, both knew that whatever it was they had was different, special, a part of them now and Frank felt himself mimicking the stupid smile on her face. He leaned down to kiss her again, and her hands tangled into his hair, the feel of her delicate nails on his scalp sent hot pokers to his belly and his already half growing arousal was, well, aroused even more.

“And that’s even though you’re an asshole who calls someone else’s name during sex…” she said as he pulled away. With a groan Frank hung his head as her arms linked around his neck, his hands locking behind her back.

“You know about that?” he asked with a little hiccup. “She told you?”

“Yup.” Fliss narrowed her eyes “And FYI you do that to me I’ll cut your balls off and feed them to Thor.” “Harsh but fair.” Frank conceded after a short pause.  She grinned and leaned up to kiss him again before she pulled away.

“Can we go now ‘cause I’m kinda horny.”

Ok, so Drunk Fliss was another Fliss to add to his list of favourite Flisses. Along with Sassy, shy, stern, sleepy, just fucked, just woken up…basically all the Flisses

“Nope.” he teased “I’m good here.” “Really?” she asked, pressing closer to him, tilting a little and he grunted a little as her hip bone pressed into his groin “Sure about that?”

“Yup…” he managed to squeak out.

“That must be a spanner in your pocket then. Or a screwdriver, or some other form of pointy tool…” she said, hardly able to finish the sentence she was laughing that much.

“Yeah, those…damned pointy tools…” he shook his head as he leaned down to kiss her. It was sloppy, open mouthed, full of tongue and absolutely filthy and left the pair of them in a bit of a daze. Frank pulled away and looked around, taking a deep breath “Ok, we can go now.”

Somehow they made it home in one piece. It took Fliss 3 attempts to get the key in the lock, the pair of them giggling like a couple of school kids, before she finally managed it and Frank leaned over and pushed the door open. Fliss stumbled slightly and Frank caught her, laughing.

“Shhh” he said.

“What for?” she asked, kicking off her shoes.

He paused for a moment and then shrugged “Actually I don’t know…”

“Idiot…” she sniggered, pushing his undone shirt down his arms before pulling at the bottom of his sleeveless. He moved so she could pull it over his head and as her fingers started to undo the button at the top of his jeans he reached round and gently found the zipper on her jumpsuit, sliding it down, his fingers gently skimming her back as they backed to the couch. Fliss fell over the arm with a thud, Frank following, before the momentum tripped him and he rolled onto the floor, pulling her with him, landing with a thud on his back. She fell on top of him, her elbow catching him in the ribs and he gave a loud huff, before she laughed and leaned over kissing him. His hands tangled into her hair, keeping her head angled perfectly, the kiss searing, leaving them breathless. Fliss pulled back and he brushed her hair back with both his hands, smiling softly at her.

“I meant what I said you know.” he looked at her

“Remind me again what that was…” she teased.

“I…” he leaned up and pecked her lips “love…” another peck “you.”

“Tell me when you’re sober…” she sassed back and gave a squeal as he whipped her over so she was on her back on the rug by the coffee table, framed between his strong arms and legs.

“In vino veritas.” he quipped and she propped herself up on her elbows, the front of her jumpsuit fell forward slightly and Frank blatantly stole a look down it at her lacy strapless bra, giving a groan.

“Yeah, and in vino a load of non-sensitas too…” she grinned and he gave a snort, as he dipped his head.

“Shut up.” he mumbled, his lips pressing onto hers again. ***** Frank groaned, blinking against the light that was streaming in through the crack in the curtains. Jesus Christ his head hurt. Rolling over he was met with a face full of hair and he blew it out of the way, smoothing down Fliss’s wild locks which were splayed all over the pillow. Gently sliding an arm under her neck he dropped the other one round her bare waist and pulled her into him, her back pressing to his chest as he snuggled close, screwing his eyes closed against the painful daylight.

“What year is it?” Fliss groaned and Frank chuckled slightly.

“Feeling rough baby?”

“Rough?” She croaked “I feel like I have a smurf in my head with a pick axe. This is all your fault.”

“My fault?“

"Yes you let me drink tequila with Bonnie.” “Ok, first off I didn’t know you were doing that until I saw you at the bar…”

“Yeah, and then you and Simon joined in…

“…and second off, you’re a grown ass woman. You make your own decisions.” She groaned again and then stilled “Fuck, we had sex last night…”

“Wow…” Frank said, laughing “Way to ruin my pride sweetheart…” “No I mean…” she shuffled onto her back and looked at him. “Did we…use…“

Franks eyes went wide. "Oh, erm…” No, no they hadn’t… fuck, fuck, fuck.

“I mean, come on, surely, we’ll be fine right?” he asked, “I mean, one time…what are the chances of…” “No, it’s not that I’m worried about.” she shook her head “I’m on the pill…I just..” she trailed off.

Frank propped himself up on his elbow as he cottoned on to what she was saying “Are you being serious?” he snorted.

“Well I don’t know where you’ve been!” she said indignantly “well, ok, maybe I know some of where you’ve been, but…” Frank snorted and shook his head “What do you take me for?”

“An ex ho?” she shot back immediately.

He fell onto his back laughing “If you must know I’ve never had unprotected sex with a one night stand in my life. And the other week I went and got tested, just for you. And I’m clean so…” “That’s so romantic… ” she grinned at him.

“Well I try.” he raised an eyebrow.

“Still love me?” she quipped and he turned his head to look at her.

“Fraid so.” “Too bad.” she teased, shuffling over to him “Coz that means you’re stuck with me…” “Oh no…” he said sarcastically as he turned onto his side, glancing down at her bare breasts “How will I ever cope?”

“Sure you’ll think of a way.” she arched an eyebrow before she suddenly went green. “Oh shit…” she mumbled, before she shot out of the bed and into the bathroom.

Frank listened to her barfing and snorted a laugh before he swung himself out of bed, glad to find his boxers on the floor by his feet. Although where the rest of his clothes where he had no idea. He knocked on the bathroom door.

“You ok?”

He heard the toilet flush and she emerged, wrapped in a robe and looked at him. “I’m never drinking tequila again. Ever.”

Frank had to hand it to his girl, despite her raging hangover she still managed to teach 4 classes of kids that day, and made it through to 9pm before she completely crashed on the sofa, falling asleep as the three of them sat in the apartment living room watching The Grinch, Mary’s choice. As the film finished at little after 10, Mary, who was lounging on Frank’s lap looked over to where Fliss lay, her head resting on the other arm of the couch, her feet nestled under his thigh, and nudged Frank.

“I know.” he said softly “Leave her be.”

Mary grinned and reached up to run her hand through his beard “you love Fliss.” He looked at her for a second, eyebrow raised “What makes you say that?”

“Roberta.” she shrugged.

Frank snorted. “Well, she’s not wrong.” “Did you tell her yet?” Mary looked at him.

“Yeah.”

“What did she say?”

“That she loves me too.”

Mary grinned “Lissy and Frank, sitting in a tree…”

He rolled his eyes as she chanted off the rest of the ridiculous rhyme and then looked at her “you finished?”

“Yup.” “Good, bed time.” “Awww Frank….”

“No arguments. Bill told me what time you stayed up till gone 1 am last night.” “Grass.” she narrowed her eyes.

“Yeah, you better believe it. Go on, wash your face, clean your teeth.”

“Shower?”

“Quit stalling Stack you had one when you got back from the stables…”

With a groan she pushed herself off his knee and he stood up as she headed into the bathroom. He pulled a fresh pair of pyjamas out of the clean pile of laundry he needed to sort that was on the chair at the back of the room and lay them on his bed before he moved over and knelt down by Fliss’ head.

“Honey…” he said gently, pushing her hair back off her face. “Baby…“

She made a noise as she wrinkled her nose, and he smiled as she blinked and looked at him.

"Oh, shit…sorry…” she said as she realised she’d fallen asleep. “What time is it?“” “Not too late.” he smiled “Just about to put Mary to bed. You staying here or…”

“Yeah if that’s ok?” “Course its ok.” he smiled.

She smiled at him as he dropped a kiss to her lips and then sat up, running her hand through her hair as she blinked, yawning. “Fuck I’m so tired.” She stood up, stretched and then smiled as Mary came back into the room. The girl shot Frank a filthy look and stalked past him into his room. “Ok, wow…” “She doesn’t want to go to bed.” he shrugged, “moody little madam.”

Fliss laughed as she headed into the bathroom. Frank sat down on the sofa and a little while later, Mary emerged and shot straight for her bed.

“Can I at least read?” she looked at him.

“10 minutes, tops.” he said, “Whilst I do the dishes…”

She grinned and he turned off the TV and headed into the kitchen, clearing away the remains of their takeaway, stowing the left overs in the fridge for lunch the day after.

In the bathroom Fliss was busy groaning to herself as she realised she’d come on. She knew she was due, but still, this was a pain in the ass. Sorting herself out, she washed her hands and walked into the kitchen. Frank looked up and raised his eyebrow, misinterpreting the look on her face.

“You been sick again?” he asked.

“No… ” she shook her head as she bit her lip. “Look, Frankie, I’m gonna go home…” “Why?” he frowned.

“I errr…” she flushed “I forgot…I…” she trailed off and his frown deepened as her hand moved instinctively to her stomach before a look of realisation crossed his features.

“Oh…” he said, nodding “Well, ok, if you’re more comfortable going home then that’s up to you sweetheart…” He dropped a kiss to her head and she looked at him, confusion flooding her brain. “You don’t want me to go?”

“Why would I want you to go?” he frowned.

“Because…” she looked at him, unable to voice what she was getting at. As a memory flooded her mind, one of John screaming at her for the sheets being marked, she was jerked back to the here and now as Frank closed the distance between them, tipping her head up to look at him. “Lissy, talk to me…”

“Sorry, I err…” she rubbed at her head “He used to make me sleep in a separate room…” “Are you for real?” Frank blurted out, and she could see the anger flooding his system. “Seriously?”

She visibly recoiled a little at his tone and Frank cursed himself as she looked at him, eyes wide as she began to apologise.

“Hey…” he said gently, reaching out to her. “Stop. You’ve nothing to be sorry for I shouldn’t have shouted I just….” he took a deep breath “That’s fucked up.” “Don’t you think I know that?” she said quietly, looking down as his hands rubbing her arms, before she looked back up at him, her eyes now had a fierce spark  “You wanna know what’s really fucked up?“ When he was trying to get me pregnant, every month he’d stop me taking pain killers. Told me it was my own fault for not managing to conceive.”

“Jesus Liss…” Frank shook his head, as she shrugged, her head turning to the side. “Baby…” “Don’t” she shrugged “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.” “Ok.” he said, nodding. “You wanna stay?”

She nodded, smiling softly.

“Good.” he said, dropping a kiss to her forehead before he moved away from her and reached over, filling the kettle.

“What are you doing?” she asked from behind him.

“Making you a tea.” he shrugged “Used to help Diane…”

“Thanks…” she said softly after a short pause.

“You got everything you need or you need to go the store?”

“I’m good.” she nodded “Ex Girl Scout, always prepared…” He gave a laugh.

“Think I might take another shower though, if that’s…” “You don’t need to ask.” he said gently

“Ok, well…” she nodded and he smiled, before she moved over and wrapped her arms round his waist, nuzzling into his chest. He gently rubbed at her back, before she leaned up, kissed him and headed out. The kettle boiled and he leaned on the side, dropping his head slightly. What kind of fucked up asshole did that to his own wife? To a wife he was supposed to love and protect no less. It broke his heart to think anyone could be so callous, so mentally and physically abusive to someone so soft, so gentle, so damned amazing….he looked up as he saw her making her way into the bathroom, bag in hand and she smiled at him, shutting the door.

Once he’d made them both a hot drink and grabbed the Advil, he made his way through to his room, placing one mug on the bedside table on the side he slept on and then another on the sill behind Fliss’ side and leaned on the doorframe, looking at Mary. She was still reading.

“Please just the end of this chapter…” she said, holding up the Harry Potter book. Frank took a deep breath, then decided fuck it. She’d fall asleep at some point, there was no school.

“Lights off after that.” he said “I’ll be out to check.” She grinned as he dropped a kiss to her head. “Night Stack.” “Night Frank.”

Back in his room he stripped off, tossing his t-shirt into the hamper before folding his jeans and dropping them on his dresser. He settled on the bed, stretching his legs out as he kicked the duvet down and flicked on the small TV, flipping through the channels looking for something to watch. Grinning when he found an episode of Family Guy, he turned the volume down low and had been watching for about 5 minutes when he heard Fliss talking to Mary who mentioned something about the book before he heard her bid her good night, and as Fliss opened the door he saw Mary’s light flip off.

He smiled at his girl who had her hair pulled back in a braid and was dressed in a pair of bed shorts and a tight camisole type top, her shoulders bare, long legs stretched as she dropped onto the bed besides him.

“You ok?” he asked, dropping a kiss to her shoulder as she reached round for the drink. She paused as she saw the Advil and then picked it up, smiling at him as she turned to face him.

“Yeah.” she assured him as he kissed the bridge of her nose. She tossed down two pain killers and sipped her drink, her legs bent in front of her as they sat in a comfortable silence, watching the TV, both laughing softly at the show. Eventually she placed the mug down and snuggled closer to him. He reached down for the duvet and pulled it up round their legs as her head lay on his chest, his arm falling round her, fingers lightly brushing down the back of her neck, shoulder and then up again. It was an action he knew she found comforting, and he was proven right as little over 15 minutes later he looked down to find her fast asleep.

With a soft smile he turned off the TV and gently moved her so that they were both lay flat and she gave a soft hum of contentment and snuggled into him closer. With a yawn he pressed a kiss to her head and closed his eyes.

******

The rest of the two weeks remaining to Christmas was spent in a whirl of tree-decorating, paper-chain making, shopping and eating more crap than Fliss had thought humanly possible. Steve and his wife Sian arrived on the 22nd and Verity cooked a huge family dinner where Mary was introduced to their twin boys. Frank watched her with interest, they were both her age and he was pleasantly surprised to see she actually seemed to mingle with them quite well. Steve was also noticeably warmer towards him too, which was a relief, and Frank was more than happy to take him out for a beer with Bill one evening whilst the women stayed at home and wrapped presents whilst drinking copious amounts of champagne. A Gallagher tradition Frank was informed, a tradition he eagerly told Bill he could fully get on board with, especially when Fliss had offered to wrap Mary’s presents as well.

By the time Christmas Eve rolled round Frank noticed that Fliss was ridiculously excited and was happy to admit it was because she was looking forward to spending it with him and her family. When Verity had invited him to join them for Christmas dinner he’d been reticent to accept at first, not because he didn’t want to, but because he didn’t want to put her out. When she’d told him she’d be more offended if he refused he’d relented and made the mistake of telling Mary who hadn’t let the subject drop for the last 2 weeks. Fliss joined them in their traditional Christmas Eve celebration with Roberta, where they exchanged gifts, Roberta made up with the chunky silver bangle Fliss had spotted in a shop and the photo frame which Mary had made one evening with Bill by glue-gunning sea shells onto a plain wooden one she had gotten from Target. Once they were done, they packed Fliss’ jeep up and headed off to the annex. After watching “Elf” in the cinema room with the rest of the family,  wearing her new Chrstmas Pyjamas (another Gallagher tradition that all the kids in the family got new ones to sleep in on Christmas Eve)  they three of them headed back over to the annex and Mary shot up to bed with no fuss at all, leaving Frank and Fliss to enjoy the rest of their evening which they spent making out like a pair of horny teenagers on the couch until they’d ended up fucking like a pair of horny teenagers on the couch too. Christmas morning Fliss cracked open an eye and grinned as she sat up, listening to Mary who was calling from the spare room, before she started to sing We Wish You A Merry Christmas, which was punctuated by barks from Thor. Besides her Frank gave a groan and she nudged him.

“Wake up scrooge.” “Fuck off.” he mumbled.

She laughed and nudged him again before she climbed out of bed, wearing his T-shirt and pulled a pair of denim shorts on “I reckon you got about 2 minutes before Mary barrels through the door…” "Fucking Christmas…” Frank said, but she caught the smile on his face as he swung his legs out of bed and stretched, the muscles on his back rippling as he did so. Standing up Fliss watched as he moved, his ass looking pretty damned fine in his boxers as he headed to the bathroom, banging on the spare room door as he did. Fliss heard it fly open and a few minutes later Mary came shooting into her room and bounced on the bed, a half-eaten chocolate Santa in her hand which she had unwrapped from her Stocking. Thor followed, taking up position on the foot of the bed and Fliss hugged Mary, grinning. She loved Christmas, she always had done as a kid. Granted, it hadn’t always been fun with he-who-shall-not-be-named, but the last 2 since leaving him she’d gotten that childish excitement back, and today was no exception.

“So, I just stand here do I?” Frank asked as he leaned on the doorway, gesturing to the now full bed. Fliss grinned at him and shrugged.

“We’re not staying here.” Mary looked at him “We got presents to open downstairs…” “Hmmm not sure we do.” Frank teased as he pulled a shirt from his bag in the corner of the room “I mean, does Santa know you’re here and not at the apartment…” Mary rolled her eyes “I haven’t believed in Santa since I was 5”

“What?” Fliss said, horrified “I still believe and I’m like 33!”

Mary gave her a scathing look. Fliss shrugged. “What can I say, I believe in Christmas magic” “I did…” Mary shrugged “Until he didn’t bring me a puppy.” “He doesn’t do live animals.” Fliss reasoned.

“Or a piano.” “Too big to fit on the sleigh.” “Or an algebra book I wanted.” “Yeah, why the hell would he bring you maths books?” Fliss snorted “That’s school work.” “I like it. "she shrugged, before she shoved the rest of her chocolate in her mouth and jumped up, bouncing on the bed. "Come on! Get up!”

Thor looked up, gave a huff and Frank told her to stop bouncing. She flopped down and looked at him, folding her arms and Fliss laughed “ok, let’s go!”

The two of them raced down the stairs, Frank following as Mary burst into the living room to see her presents piled by the sofa, and her eyes immediately went to the large wooden box which wasn’t wrapped that had her name painted on the side, and a large painted white pony on the top, resembling Monty. She moved to it and opened it, giving a squeal as she began to pull out the various grooming products that Fliss had bought her to make her own little pony box.  As Mary began to hastily rip the wrapping paper off the rest of the pile of gifts, Frank moved to the tree and pulled out 2 boxes. One large, one small.

“Merry Christmas baby girl.” he said, dropping a kiss to Fliss mouth. She grinned and sat down on the couch, opening the little box first. Inside was a silver necklace a pendant in the shape of a Daisy which Fliss beamed at.

“I love daisies!” she smiled at him “They remind me of home.” “I know.” he smiled as she looked at it again before she moved to the next box. This was the one Frank was excited about. They’d cost him a small fortune but, turns out when you don’t spend every Friday night in Ferg’s you actually saved a fair bit of dough. Who knew? “Oh my god…” she whispered as she cleared the paper away from the contents and glanced down at the tan Cowboy boots. She took a deep breath as she picked one out of the box to examine the detailing on the leather before her eyes widened as she saw her name ‘Lissy’ stitched on the top.

“Do you like them?” he asked softly, although he could tell from her reaction that was a stupid question.

“Frankie…” she looked at him with tears in her eyes, God this man really did listen to every damned word she said.  “I can’t…” she leaned over and gave him a kiss. “Thank you…”

He smiled as she slipped them on and stood up, giving Mary a twirl. There was something about her wearing them along with denim shorts that Frank wasn’t ashamed to admit he found a little arousing.

Frank laughed when he got his presents from Fliss, a new Paul Smith shirt, a Red Sox Cap and a new Samsung Smartphone as she informed him his Nokia had gone out of fashion in 2009. Which was before Mary was born, she pointed out. But it was the gifts they both got from Mary that surprised and reduced them to tears of laughter.

Fliss held up the cowboy hat, grinning from ear to ear as she slipped it on whilst Frank held the white Navy Captain’s hat up and shook his head. “Where on Earth did you get these?” he asked, laughing.

“Bill helped me.” Mary shrugged, looking up from where she was now jamming a pink Ariat baseball cap which she had just unwrapped on her head.

“Remind me to thank him later!” Frank rolled his eyes as Fliss snatched the hat from him and stuck it on his head.

“Mary, get in…” she patted Frank’s knee and Mary hopped up, as Fliss held her phone away from them, snapping a selfie of the 3 of them. Frank watched her as she smiled, inspecting it and he had to admit it was a pretty good snap of the 3 of them. All smiling, all wearing some form of head gear, and for the first time in as long time he realised he was enjoying Christmas morning because HE was having a good time, not just Mary. To him it normally meant a fuck load of expense and the fact another year was rapidly drawing to a close. But he was more than happy to draw a close on 2017. Not simply to shut the door on a mentally draining court fight, but also because he was looking forward to the future. He was starting a new job, would be in the market for a new home and moving through all of those changes with his girl by his side excited him instead of filling him with dread.

As Mary slid off his knee to examine another present he turned to Fliss who grinned, knocking his hat off his head.

“Merry Christmas cowgirl.” he grinned,

She smiled, leaning over to kiss him “Merry Christmas Sailor!”

[meztliel]

Launchitz (Launch/Raditz).

Launch is sick and can't stop sneezing, and poor Raditz is the only one brave enough to take care of her.

***********

He can almost hear the sound of a thousand Saiyan antecessors laughing at him from the afterlife. A small part of Raditz wishes that the green man would have done his job right, that he’d given Raditz a swift warrior’s death so that he’d have been eventually spared the humiliation of playing caretaker to a puny human woman.

"Thanks, Radi. I really appreciate this. Mmm. Smells delicious."

Horrors seizes him as Launch, inhaling the vapor rising from the instant miso soup he prepared for her, twitches her nose. Hell. He knew he should've omitted the chilli peppers. He only added them because that fucking overgrown turtle said it would help with her congestion.

Raditz grudgingly waits for the inevitable to happen as he watches her sneeze.

"Achoo!"

Launch, now magically blonde, makes a revolted face and spits out the soup back into the bowl.

"That's disgusting! How can someone mess up instant miso?"

"I added some extra shit in there that's supposed to make you feel better. You're fucking welcome."

Launch is slightly thrown off by this, her anger subsiding just a titch. She frowns impetuously and sinks back into the pillows, the soup steaming on one of the bedside tables, next to a framed picture of her with a chubby kid Kakarot and a few other earthling fools.

"I can take care of myself."

Raditz narrows his eyes doubtfully at her, noting how clammy her forehead is and how pink her cheeks are. Her voice sounds like a hoard of cats has been scratching at her throat from the inside, and her normally lovely eyes are watery and droopy.

"That's bullshit and you know it. I don't know much about human ailments, but I can see that you must feel like absolute shit because you look like it."

He dodges the pillow flung at him, grinning. There's still some spunk in her.

"Why do ya care anyway? Thought you only liked me for my body."

Raditz scowls.

He's only helping her recover for his sake. The faster she recovers from this inconvenience the faster she's going to stop switching personalities every goddamn-

"Achoo!"

Two to ninety seconds. And the less personality switches she has per minute, the more his stay here is going to be a little less miserable.

"So you do care! Oh, Radi, I could give you a hug, even, maybe a little kiss," Blue Launch giggles into her hands and smiles shyly at him. "But I don't wanna get you sick."

Why is his face hot all of a sudden? Maybe his own immune system is compromised and he's coming down with whatever this freaky human disease is.

Launch looks at the bowl sitting on the bedside table, reaching for it.

"No don't!"

She retracts her hands immediately and looks at him with a mildly shocked look in her eyes from his sudden outburst.

"I'll, uh get you some tea and veggies or something. I don't think I can fuck that up."

Launch smiles sheepishly. "It wasn't that bad, really, and I do appreciate the extra mile you did in making it extra nutritious for me! You really do have a good heart."

Raditz feels his features contort into a grimace as she continues to smile sweetly at him.

"Whatever. I'll be right back."

He's preparing a pot of water when he hears her sneeze, then sneeze again. Then sneeze again a few more times in succession to the point he doesn't know which Launch he's going to get when he goes in.

"About fucking time."

Blonde Lunch.

"I could just throw this cup of tea at your tits."

"You'd like that wouldn't you. Damn perv. Give it here."

He'd be mad if she didn't look and sound so damn miserable, so he carefully hands it over to her.

Slowly, she takes a sip from the teacup, sighing in gratification when she takes a gulp. "Decent. You're catching on to our ways, Radish-boy."

"We had something similar to tea in Vegeta, but it was made out of different plant life, some of which gave us a significant boost of energy. Not like the weak shit here."

"You think everything from Earth is weak, and yet here you are. Serving me tea."

Raditz's tail twitches with the urge to wrap around her mouth and shut her up.

He could even kill her if he wanted to, but he has no desire to do that. Crazy bitch that she is, she reminds him a lot of the fiery, strong-willed women from his home planet. Even the soft side of her reminds him a little of the rare gem that was his mother, and Blue Launch is definitely easier to get along with when she's not sassing him back.

"Thanks. Not sure why you’re doing this, but if you weren’t taking care of me, nobody would. Tien is off who knows where the fuck where, I don't want Roshi anywhere near me, Yamcha is out getting whipped by Bulma. Turtle is a turtle. Goku is, well, Goku. And everyone else is too chicken shit to be around me like this, and I don’t blame ‘em. So thanks."

Raditz massages his neck, unable to keep his eyes locked with hers any longer

"Um sure."

The corner of her mouth briefly quirks up, then disappears as she opens her mouth and makes ominent noises, and he's already grabbed her tea to save it from spilling all over her and the sheets as she lets out another germy one.

Blue Launch sniffs, then lets out a soft chuckle. "You better go back downstairs before you catch what I have."

"Saiyans don't get infected with human ailments and diseases."

"You sure?"

He's not, but he'd rather she not know that.

"Well in that case…"

She lifts the bed sheets off her person in a flourish, a sudden surge of energy she didn't have before passing through her weakened body.

His mind has hardly any time to formulate a response as she props her knees up on the bed and angles her chin up to kiss him on his face, only a whisker's length away from the corner of his mouth.

She throws herself back on the bed, giggling as she hides herself under the blankets.

"I can't believe I did that!" She says with a thrill in her small, high voice.

He can't either. He's frozen still, heart jackhammering his ribcage when he hears that little dreaded sound come out her mouth again.

"I can't believe I did that!" A huskier voice calls out from under the sheets, and at that Raditz manages to get his feet moving forward, promptly escaping the premises, breathing hard as he slams the door, runs downstairs, and drinks a glass of water.

He's catching something. He must be catching something because this warm, dizzying sensation that’s shooting up his blood stream and filling up his head is unlike anything he's ever experienced before and it's sickening.

"Damn that woman. And her damn germs."

[remus-whoisleft]

red tongues and hands | remus&sirius & hope

It was restlessness and discomfort, boiling blood just beneath too-tight skin and a pounding headache; it was the full moon.

There wasn’t much to do but let it happen, though the added bonus of being at home meant Remus could, at least, self-medicate a titch more than he could while at school. It didn’t matter if he was a bit more fuzzy headed than usual, prone to dozing off on Sirius’s shoulder while the pair of them sat on the couch, or slow on the uptake when asked a question (simple things like ‘would you like some tea, love?’ or ‘has the potion kicked in yet, baby?’ that, mercifully, never strayed too far from requiring a simple yes or no from him).

Remus had, by his own insistence, spent a small portion of the day outside. Gardening was something he didn’t get to do at school, not when he could barely keep a magical plant alive; the fresh air was good for him, anyway, especially knowing he was about to spend an entire night trapped in the too small, slightly moldy and highly stuffy cottage basement. So he gently snipped away overgrown flowers, replanted them, tucked one particularly lovely wild violet behind Sirius’s ear - and then went inside to wait, content with the feeling of having done something at least halfway productive.

So he dozed, no worries about Hope and Lyall feeling suspicious about his head’s heavy gravitation to Sirius every time he nodded off. They’d know the truth soon enough, and a slightly drugged up Remus having trouble keeping his eyes open wasn’t going to be the thing that turned on that particular light bulb for them. That, and he hardly noticed Hope watching the pair of them fondly - but worriedly, it was a full moon after all - while he laughed gently at Sirius’s jokes and hummed his soft “mhms” in an attempt to hold a conversation while he was awake and willed his body to resist the change.

It wouldn’t work, it never did; but it didn’t hurt to pray that one day it might just stop. 

His lower back tensed in a tight, sudden spasm and jolted him fully awake, letting out nothing more than a soft, resigned hiss at the pain. Luckily it was quick, just leaving a dull ache in its wake; nothing comparable to the pain he’d be feeling in - 

Christ. Remus blinked at Sirius first, realizing the firelight illuminating his partner’s face was quickly becoming a necessity as the sun sank lower and lower in the gloomy March sky. The curtains were pulled back on the nearest windows, giving the Lupins and Guest full view of the unstoppable countdown happening in the pleasantly chilly dusk Welsh sky. It was soon.

“Almost time already?” He mumbled, rubbing at his eyes like a stubborn toddler refusing to admit they were ready to be put down to bed. Remus glanced over the back of the couch, watched with that normal sense of dull dread as Lyall near-silently continued his ritual of casting protection charms along the perimeter of the house.

Didn’t want any noises getting out, was the thing. No neighbors for miles, but the wolf made a bloody loud racket when it was trapped. When Remus had nothing to do but throw himself against walls and howl for freedom and for blood and for food and nothing to scratch and bite but himself. Remus blinked slowly at his father, shuddered against Sirius; nothing to worry about yet, just the unpleasant sensation of his blood starting to boil. Like the moon inching its way to its dreaded peak was slowly cranking up the heat on his normally cold body in tandem with its climb.

He’d be burning up soon enough, probably half an hour tops; it’d melt away the last of his rational thought in about an hour, along with every sharp crack and twist and painful reformation of his bones.

“Sorry you have to - be here for this,” Remus added, his voice slurring ever so slightly, though he framed it with a brave little smile. Hope was sitting in the overstuffed armchair nearby reading now, though she hadn’t flipped to another page in minutes; she turned her head to look at Remus, worrying at her bottom lip. Remus pretended not to notice her concerned stare, and he knew Sirius would tell him not to apologize, but as he fixed his house guest with tired, achey eyes he hoped the other boy would realize what he actually meant:

I’m sorry you have you stay upstairs for this. I promise I’ll be alright, even without Padfoot there to keep me company.

@sirius-whoisleft