#anyways I just needed to get this out of my system lol
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Hmm
#i would genuinely rather barry date some weird gym rat personal trainer girl than a pop star who is a taylor groupie#like I pointedly dislike t*ylor sw*ft and anyone who is buddies buddies with her#have a pr relationship if you want but god pick a better match pls...#and we all fucking know the twt stans are so mean towards him bcs he's dating their precious pop girly or whatever the fuck#i wish he wasn't so mainstream now#like get the bag king but also can the normies pls not perceive him?#all the pictures comming out is making me bitter lmfao#gnawing on wood crawling on the floor r#he's probably flying on their private jets too lmao go queen kill the earth!#“hiding” it in the tags bcs im a pussy lol#sabr*na is probably a nice girl but ugh#anyways I just needed to get this out of my system lol#mouthy mint#🫤
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It must be weird to live so long that an integral part of himself is now accepted, he'll need more time to get there too
#veearts#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel redesign#alastor redesign#alastor#radio demon#redesign#charlie morningstar#charlie redesign#hazbin hotel fanart#hazbin hotel comic#aromantic#aroace#asexual#see peep the way the book he's got has ace colors...#his mouth ourple too...his clothes kinda green...my design for him is a lil coded lol#this is for aro week btw yeah. this is semi projecty too but not reeeally#anyway this was self indulgent I just needed to get this out my system#aroace character rep so important to me raaah
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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That causes Dande’s resolve to soften somewhat...
#dnd art#dnd character#comic#sketch#dnd#very rough but i needed it out of my system#dandelion treehollow#jalester silvermane#lionmane#dande was trying to get jalester to agree not to go to the feywild#where the party needs to go to fix dande's mistake/betrayal#but dande doesn't want them to go because he thinks they're gonna die. or something worse.#he's still freaked out from his few minutes back Home (with his hag mom)#anyway he was trying to have a serious conversation but his resolve was melted away by jalester saying a few quite nice things#dande is so easily emotionally distracted lol#“I feel like we don't wanna have the same conversation.”#links in the text are just to other drawings i did while ruminating on this scene#ugh this is so rough but i have actual work i need to do BOOOOO
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Blah blah blah the house always wins blah blah
#i didnt quite make it in time for his bday#alas#anyways happy bday to him. hope hes out there somewhere having a good time on his ipad#this is just a quick little thing bc i needed to get it out of my WIPs#mr house#robert house#robert edwin house#fnv#fallout#fallout fanart#fallout new vegas#also i think i figured out what i wanna do w my posting/tagging system#i think i want most finished pieces to go here and then fandom-specific sketches and stuff on their respective sideblogs#more than likely ill just keep posting wherever i feel like it on any given day tho lol#anyways
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Katie & Trip | Touch
#power rangers time force#power rangers#trip regis#katie walker#do NOT come at me for how shit these gifs are i TRIED OKAY#why was time force shot so much in the DANG DARK#the more i brighten the worse it looks ;-;#anyway this is for me and the two other people who will enjoy this lol#katie and trip make me go 🥺💕😭💖🥰#like what is their PROBLEM they don't do this with anyone else!!#my headcanon is that they are just besties with the same love language#and i also headcanon that xybrians need regular physical touch for stress & immune system regulation#like the way he's just doing some research on the computer with his hand on her arm?? whats that about#and the way she'll just drape herself over him any chance she gets is just... ;-;#i might keep working on these and replace them if i find out what else might work but with photopea and the best quality 🏴☠️ i could find#this was the best i could do#and i am now emerging from this hyperfocus oh my GOD IM SO HUNGRY I FEEL SIIIIICKKKKKK#ok ok bye bye
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Claudia, Claudia
Predicting a being who always held more cards in his hand than she did was difficult. She'd resigned herself to searching for Aaravos, alone, figuring her best shot was going to Katolis Castle and cutting through whatever and whoever she had to.
His voice surprised her, a voice she could hear when some part of her mind seemed to buzz, a voice that she'd gotten used to only catching whispers of in her ear. Now, it spoke in her mind directly.
I'll come to you. Wait for me.
She stopped in the middle of the forest path she'd been taking west. "What?" she asked aloud. Aaravos had never been one to respond to her when she wanted, much to her fury. She spun around, as if he was really there, still not used to her makeshift new leg, stumbling slightly. "Aaravos, come on! I don't- I don't know what else to do!"
Of course he wasn't there.
Because no one was, nor would they be. Not anymore.
Claudia halted for the day, making camp early, wondering if there was anything to his command for her to wait.
When she next heard his voice, it shot chills down her spine.
Claudia, Claudia,
She bolted up in her bedroll, gasping for breath. Unlike before, when he spoke into her mind, his voice seemed to echo physically around her, cushioned by the canopy of leaves above her.
A figure stood behind the last smoldering embers of her campfire. Tall, silhouette outlined by the moon, every angle from the hem of his robes to the curves of his horns elegant against the sky behind him. His skin glistened with constellations from somewhere far away, but the brightest spots were under his eyes. Even his eyes seemed to glow.
Those eyes glinted for just a moment as Aaravos took her in, expression softening as he knelt. He reached out, the scene still like a dream to her, fingertips resting on her jaw, thumb wiping away a tear she hadn't known had shed in her sleep.
"I'm here."
It was still as though his voice enveloped them both, deep and reassuring, just a hint of breathlessness to it as though he couldn't believe it either, a crack in the mask. She meant something to him- she was the first person he wanted to see.
She was first, to someone.
Claudia stumbled out of her sleeping bag and into his arms without thinking. "He's gone," she said, rambling and trying to catch her breath. "And Terry, he didn't understand- I know he'd leave too and so I had to go first, and- I just-"
"I know." He radiated patience, understanding without condescending. Aaravos returned her embrace, after a moment of hesitation. Perhaps she should have waited, given him time, how long had it been since he'd touched anyone? She almost pulled back but he held her closer, finally not just his voice but his breath and warmth also in her ear. "I never break a promise, Claudia."
Aaravos pulled back enough to look in her eyes, caring smile placating her worries. "I know what true loyalty means, what a gift you are to me." Claudia sniffled, torn between wanting to sob over how the past week had been or trying to be strong, to prove she was powerful enough, to earn what had always been impossible to earn, but there was no need for any of it.
"You have never failed in tests of love," he said, as if he knew what she wanted to hear, what she'd needed to hear all of her life. His lips twitched upwards into a smirk, relishing his own words. "Others failed us, Claudia. We need only give them what's coming to them for it."
#tdp#tdp spoilers#the dragon prince#aaravos#claudia tdp#tdp s6 spoilers#just needed to get this ficlet out of my system so i can do my finals raughhh#anyway. cant wait for this to be so fucked up. bless#tagging for spoilers bc of the teaser/date video but this is only inspired by it#wrote this right in this text box lol
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rafayel and sylus deciding to let each other pick their halloween costumes, sylus gets rafayel a cat costume because he knows it will annoy rafayel and that he will throw a fit, and rafayel gets sylus a dog/werewolf costume with a leash so he can drag sylus around all night, expecting sylus to hate it and to be able to tease sylus about it for the rest of their lives
#spoiler alert rafayels plan backfired because it just awakened something in sylus lol#idk why i was suddenly possessed with this idea but i needed to get it out of my system asap#anyways sylus and rafayel would lovingly hate each other and i am so sure of it#love and deepspace#lnds#rafayel x sylus#crowfish#(<—??? thats not as good as some of my other ship names but im going with it anyways)#lnds sylus#lnds rafayel#any homophobia or hate will be blocked so don’t waste either of our time the block button is free please use it
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life pro tip: buy miniature cookware. it saves space and a lot of mini appliances come with little recipe books as well. if it's too small to cook a filling meal in one go, simply prep your ingredients so you can make more servings more quickly. i.e. mini waffle maker makes too-tiny waffles?? you will have excess batter just make more. tiny skillet makes too-small portions?? set your chicken and spices or whatever you have aside and make more servings. plus your next serving is freshly cooked oooo. mini baking stuff?? make another batch babyyyy that's half of baking anyway
*DISCLAIMER: this user keeps buying mini cookware because its cute and is also currently fantasizing about living independently and is Coping. life pro tip may not be effective for all readers.
#ramblings with major#i just needed to get this out of my system lol#i bought a mini breadpan springpan and rolling pin set from the halloween section of my local grocery store. the pin is orange with bats.#i love it and i still need to make tiny bread with it#i also have. mini skillet. a separate mini cast iron skillet in the shape of a heart. and mini waffle maker#y'all don't understand those waffle makers come in so many colors and shapes of waffles#they have YELLOW HONEYCOMB. i NEED IT.#AND THEY'RE ALL LESS THAN $20. SOMETIMES CHEAPER.#i also have too many cookie cutters but that's unrelated#im gonna be so set on cookware when i move out#i hope my parents still have that cute microwave we had for a while....#i say as if i'm planning to move out anytime soon#ANYWAY mini cookware we love mini cookware in this household#im watching. so many renter friendly diy decor videos rn.
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Klavier Gavin deserved an arc. He could've been really interesting if he was given one. By starting him off with the ideals that the trilogy preached they didn't create much room for growth strictly in terms of politics and how he works in the courtroom because he was already ideologically aligned with the morals of 4. Which was a fantastic setup for a positive rival character. But they really didn't do anything super interesting with his character. They gave him a good work-life balance and they didn't create room to elaborate on any of his personal relationships because of that. There was still so much they could've done for him to get an arc as a character outside of the political commentary his character is supposed to make though. His feelings surrounding Daryan Crescend's arrest were really under-explored and his relationship with Kristoph is never fleshed out at all. Like the game presented that they were brothers, but we don't get to see them talk about or to each other for most of it. His dynamic with Apollo isn't even fleshed out, it just stops at Apollo being jealous of him. Klavier's feelings about Apollo aren't even stated clearly because Klav is just a guy who does his job like a professional. Him and Apollo aren't even really friends by the end of the game. They're aquaintances who may occasionally bump into eachother in the workplace. The closest we get to a contentious workplace relationship is with Ema, and she holds most of the animosity there. So he has like no defined relationships and no arc surrounding his political views when it comes to the legal system or his approach to prosecution. It feels like such a waste because I like Klavier a lot. He's funny. But fuck he's so shallow compared to the other prosecuters.
#the sentence flow for this is godawful lol too many periods not enough commas what a nightmare to read lmao#anyways#ace attorney#klavier gavin#genuinely just posting this to get it out of my system i might need to come back and edit this because i am not proud of the choices i made#grammatically and semantically
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🕸🎀˚.⁺⊹
#so i have an appt. to the psychiatric department for personality disorders tmrw...#and like i tried sending a self referral to them last year lmao#and they only said that heyyy you're doing amazing sweetie you are high functioning 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻#then i've ben to the health care center and since they think they cant treat me bc it's too severe they've sent referrals to other places#which have all declined me... so they also sent one to the psychiatric who sent a referral to this pd department#who that time also said that they can't accept me#so the therapist at the health care center like idk exactly but she sent a report on how they didnt handl my case properly#which made them call on me for an evalutation appt.#but i have 0 hopes. i honestly think the entire psych care is fucking lame and bullshit#i highly doubt they're even equipped to treat personality disorders#& even if they are theire budgetis getting cut bc ppl love having rightists ruling the government .... which means no funds for healthcare#anyway. PLUS it's a man.... -_- which reducuses my chances of being taken seriously even more...#i also hate talking to male therapists/psychiatrists... no fucking thanks. but i have to </3#i just really dont wanna go. like im gonna have to put energy into trying to argue for my right for treatment. w ppl who should inferstand#UNDERSTAND* i hate typing on my ipad ffs. they should understand my personality disorders..#bit health care proffessionals are horrible ppl and dont give a fuck abt their patients lol. so they're only condescending and rude 🤢🤮#i hate being in these environments bc everyone treats u like shit. the receptionists are so fkn rude and almost outright mean and insulting#the doctors and therapists and psychiatrists are all bullies who look down on u and make u feel small and worthless#so im really dreading it... but im also at my wit's end. i am missing out on my entire life. im desperate for help#even if i wholeheartedly believe that these worthless wastes of space wont give me any treatment i'll still need to go and try#then ig i'll just have to keep pestering the healthcare system. i might wventually even have to start going to the psych. ER so they put#that on my records and like idk. that costs money tho. plus from everyone i've heard from...#being at a psych ER esp when your situation isnt dire is awful and hell#my cousin who had been ther after a sui attempt had said that it 'scared him straight'#and that it was so terrible that he did everything to get back home as soon as possible and do whatever to never end up there again#so yuh... i'd rather not!#i was supposed to (my own decision) to write a list with ALL my symptoms and bring and be like LOOK MONGREL!!!#but since i suffer from avpd...... i havent. i procrastinated and now it's too late whoopsie. i'll just have to wing it fuckkkk 🥴#ofc it also has to be 8.45 .. so early in the morning for me im so mad ahhhhh i dont wanna go i am throwing up and screaming#but atp i'd have to pay $35 myself for not going so that will motivate me enough to force myself to go
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Oh fuck tomorrow I'm going to be a little birthday boy I keep almost forgetting
#it's probably bc i dont have specific plans im just playing it by ear based on how the newborn will be#(the amount of time I'll be needed w the other kids basically depends on how much sleep the parents got the night before lol)#so i dont wanna be out too late... ahh i miss the club bro i wanna go#i love kids just to be clear which is why i do this but i also think I've gotten any child rearing out of my system#so i dont want my own. in a way it's freeing bc my future will just be for me and i won't have to worry about this stuff long term lol#ah but if I'm free on the 4th theres also something else i wanna do so maybe i shouldn't get drunk anyway#maybe just wait for the next free day 🤷♂️ we'll see#I've been highover BAD though shit lasted until like 8pm the next day. and i had to take the day off w the kids#luckily there happened to be other family there that took over but dude it sucked. i remember trying to help them in the morning like#ok sorry 4 year old trying to find pants i have to lay down in your bed you can do it by yourself i believe in you#so. taking the day off was a good call for their sakes too lol#he was fine just to be clear he could've done it on his own either way. i was just unhelpful 😅 i promise im usually way more attentive
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what if I change my major again,,,,,
#a bit of a vent im sorry#who likes computer science anyway?#uhhh im having another crisis I think LOL#have I ever explained my full School Situation here before ??#idk#TLDR im was majoring in psychology. had an oh shit I don't wonna do 90% of psych things moment#already had 90% credits needed to graduate by end of year two. might as well tack on another major then#and instead of like... sociology. business. human development family services. I fucking chose computer science.#and im on my computer 99% of the time anyway..#whyyyy#fuck me I hate cs#head in hands#but idk what I want to do thats the issue#and I don't wonna get shoehorned into something I hate#but I feel like im not particularly Good At Anything anymore#like I spread myself too thin instead of committing to Just One Thing#ugh#:(#IDK it just made sense like. it was something I could do to get money#I just think I need to have a proper breakdown over this and get it out of my system
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finally finished all of one character's entire quests/optional dialogue/questions/etc.... 100,000 words... .... aughhh
#Given some of it IS lines of code and stuff but like.. minus all that it's still probably at least 85 - 95k words hhhhhh#AND I have to do this for another 3 characters. Then a few partial quests for 3 others. THEN the other random misc stuff in the game#(like there are public areas in the city like a park and a forest that you can go and do a few things at. and chat with a few random#townsfolk that aren't actually full characters or anything. And there's a community board where you can#browse some of the random job advertisments or silly things that happen to be posted around#and also pick up a few odd jobs of your own to help earn coin to buy gifts for the npcs. etc. etc.)#Originally I was thinking like 'ah I'll make a short little game just to try it out! :3 It'll take maybe a few months!''#haha........................hee hee........................................hoho#Also evil that it would have been done already if I didn't totally drop itand stop working on it for like 5 years randomly#i could have made 5 years of steady slow progress gradually. instead of like 'one initial idea dump + about a month of art and writing'#...... 5 year break..... 'sudden mad dash to try to get probably 400.000 words written in a year or less' lol#I just really want to be done and have something out there already so it can lead to doing other things in my world..!!!!!! T o T#Like this can be an introduction and then maybe from that I can make other games. or short story anthologies. or other such things#But there needs to be some initially not very complex easy to interact with starting point first I guess... if that makes sense#That's part of why I stopped posting worldbuilding lore dump stuff as often because its' like.. massive walls of novella length#text are much more inacessible to engage with than like.. ooh a game! and there's characters! so its more approachable! and theres#visuals! oo! and the text is broken up in small bits line by line with other things in betwen! oo! etc. etc. lol#Not that THIS is even very accessible. I think dialogue heavy interactive fiction/visual novel type stuff is pretty niche and considered#boring or tedious compared to something with more ''gamplay'' like where you can actually move around in a world#and shoot things or whatever lol. But its an inbetween point. something SLIGHTLY#more accesible for now. Since i just dont have the budget or means or ability to make some skyrim type thing obviously LOL#Though maybe if theres any interest in the visual novel that could lead to making other things too. or at least I hope. I have a VERY cool#idea for a more ''gamey'' type of game that is a super fun concept and etc. but I would need to hire at least 2 people to make it.. ough..#I could do all the writing and probably half of the art. But I think I'd inevitably need a 3d artist and someone who can Code For Real hbjh#the system for ren'py (the thing I'm making a visual novel in) is not that complicated if you stick to just simple dialogue and stuff.#Making a whole moderately sized 3d game with minigames in it and a bunch of quest features and etc. would be out of my simplistic scope#''just learn it yourself!!' ... i barely manage to eat and sleep reliably every day lol... i do not function well enough to spend months#learning that many new skills. I already have a lot of of things I'm good at (not in a braggy way but just factually like.. i already have#a wide variety of different things under my belt).. at some point I have to just be happy with what i CAN already do and focus on that#and admit I need to get outside help sometimes ghjbh... NO more new skills/hobbies!!! ... ANYWAY
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i always say im able-bodied bc i feel like it best describes my General Lived Experience but i do have that like. thing in my legs where if i walk briskly for some distance (like 500 meters) i get this crushing pain in my whole lower legs which gets worse and worse if i keep walking until i eventually have to sit down for a few minutes and wait for it to go away. which im still trying to get diagnosed bc so far artery scans and muscle ultrasounds render nothing. and ngl it is like, an issue often enough and is a pretty bothersome thing when it happens (like not only bc its extremely painful but also having to find some place to sit down in the middle of the street and having to stay there a while isnt awesome) so im not entirely sure "able-bodied" fully describes me but i also am not sure its a disability bc we dont know wtf it is. so i guess im kind of in a weird inbetween where i err on the side of just assuming its not a disability and its just like, an annoying body thing..
#97#i guess if it happened every single day or something i would probably feel more confident identifying it as like....#idk some type of disability or at least something worth integrating into my definition of my general health#and ensuing relationship to my body to the medical system etc etc#but bc it only happens when i walk briskly for a bit and i dont even go out for a walk every day it doesnt feel worth mentioning#anyway ive had this since 2019 or 2018 lol but the first round of attempted diagnosing i gave up early#and for a few years i just ignored it which is easier when i dont get out a lot anyway#but im currently in the process of attempting to figure out what it is again..#by september ill know if its compartment syndrome which has been brought up but is apparently unlikely#thats the last exam were doing so. if its not that then ngl idk what the next options are#bc this was everything my doctor could think of to explain it#another thing abt it not being diagnosed and not clearly being a disability is i dont dare ask for a seat in public when i need one lol#which has been an issue a few times where every seat is taken but i REALLY need to sit to stop the pain#if i could say 'excuse me i have (x thing) i really need a seat' id maybe dare to ask#but i dont manage to just be like 'hey could i get a seat my legs hurt' lol
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I won’t lie to you all… I’m on a holiday with a friend and it has mostly been lovely but today she was stressed about stuff and likely took it out on me at one point in a way that was really unfair and we did part for a while and I cried. she later said sorry and that I hadn’t done anything wrong so clearly felt bad about it (only after I apologised though, mostly to see if she’d let me get away with taking the blame but she took responsibility herself, which was at least positive) but like it is true that about 5% of the time this friend can be difficult and it’s just hard to manage when it happens
#also I’m sorry but sometimes she is inconsiderate and a bit rude#and at one point today it was especially staggering#bc I’d walked 30 minutes through the 37c heat to get to her#and when I arrived to the street I sat down somewhere a moment and said I needed a minute to recharge bc I felt overheated and dehydrated#she then is like ‘well I’ve been here for a while and kind of want to go right away. you don’t have to come’#like…….. excuse me? can you consider my real needs for a moment?#obviously I don’t want to be left here. I’m sorry but my mother would have kicked me if I’d said that to a friend#anyway she has apologised and it’s fine I just needed to get it out of my system#and quite frankly that wasn’t the main event that was about an hour later when we reunited#but I’ve made my peace she got hot and bothered. I know she cares about me it’s just hard sometimes#it’s also lowkey only child behaviour I’ve known other only children like this lol#moth.txt
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