#wrote this right in this text box lol

[thrandilf]

Claudia, Claudia

Predicting a being who always held more cards in his hand than she did was difficult. She'd resigned herself to searching for Aaravos, alone, figuring her best shot was going to Katolis Castle and cutting through whatever and whoever she had to.

His voice surprised her, a voice she could hear when some part of her mind seemed to buzz, a voice that she'd gotten used to only catching whispers of in her ear. Now, it spoke in her mind directly.

I'll come to you. Wait for me.

She stopped in the middle of the forest path she'd been taking west. "What?" she asked aloud. Aaravos had never been one to respond to her when she wanted, much to her fury. She spun around, as if he was really there, still not used to her makeshift new leg, stumbling slightly. "Aaravos, come on! I don't- I don't know what else to do!"

Of course he wasn't there.

Because no one was, nor would they be. Not anymore.

Claudia halted for the day, making camp early, wondering if there was anything to his command for her to wait.

When she next heard his voice, it shot chills down her spine.

Claudia, Claudia,

She bolted up in her bedroll, gasping for breath. Unlike before, when he spoke into her mind, his voice seemed to echo physically around her, cushioned by the canopy of leaves above her.

A figure stood behind the last smoldering embers of her campfire. Tall, silhouette outlined by the moon, every angle from the hem of his robes to the curves of his horns elegant against the sky behind him. His skin glistened with constellations from somewhere far away, but the brightest spots were under his eyes. Even his eyes seemed to glow.

Those eyes glinted for just a moment as Aaravos took her in, expression softening as he knelt. He reached out, the scene still like a dream to her, fingertips resting on her jaw, thumb wiping away a tear she hadn't known had shed in her sleep.

"I'm here."

It was still as though his voice enveloped them both, deep and reassuring, just a hint of breathlessness to it as though he couldn't believe it either, a crack in the mask. She meant something to him- she was the first person he wanted to see.

She was first, to someone.

Claudia stumbled out of her sleeping bag and into his arms without thinking. "He's gone," she said, rambling and trying to catch her breath. "And Terry, he didn't understand- I know he'd leave too and so I had to go first, and- I just-"

"I know." He radiated patience, understanding without condescending. Aaravos returned her embrace, after a moment of hesitation. Perhaps she should have waited, given him time, how long had it been since he'd touched anyone? She almost pulled back but he held her closer, finally not just his voice but his breath and warmth also in her ear. "I never break a promise, Claudia."

Aaravos pulled back enough to look in her eyes, caring smile placating her worries. "I know what true loyalty means, what a gift you are to me." Claudia sniffled, torn between wanting to sob over how the past week had been or trying to be strong, to prove she was powerful enough, to earn what had always been impossible to earn, but there was no need for any of it.

"You have never failed in tests of love," he said, as if he knew what she wanted to hear, what she'd needed to hear all of her life. His lips twitched upwards into a smirk, relishing his own words. "Others failed us, Claudia. We need only give them what's coming to them for it."

[urhoneycombwitch]

plan b

___

foreword: thank you to this anon, this was just the right amount of sitcom Spider-man pointing meme-ery that I needed. wrote this with husky!neighbor!Eddie since I thiiiink I’ve established that version of him is modern so hopefully this aligns with my made-up canon. lol.

wc: 1.9k

cw: weight mention (in the context of finding meds, no numbers used), embarrassment on R’s end of kink discussion, frenemies vibes between R and Eddie (they get under each other’s skin but in a hot way <3), Eddie is soft-domming in public, no actual smut but still +18 mdni

DISCLAIMER: Plan B can really fuck your shit up and shouldn’t necessarily be used when introducing new kinks. Please do your research and consult w/ a medical professional before using. Putting the fiction in fic with this one.

_____

Christ, there are too many options.

Your vision is swimming in the Family Planning aisle, fluorescent overheads of the CVS taking up residence in your left temple.

You press your fingertips against the spot, massaging gently as you pull different brands of boxes from the shelf to inspect the instructions.

This one says take within twenty-four hours, that might be- oh, shit, there’s a weight cap. Dammit. And this one’s… twice the price? For fucking why?

Frustrated, you shove the expensive thing back in place. The words on the blue label next in line catches your eye- Pre-Seed Fertility Lubricant- and you snap your hand away, as if scorched. Nope. Opposite of what you need. Christ. Pre-Seed?!

It’s almost giggle-worthy. You take out your phone, glancing up and down the aisle; the store is empty this late at night, just an older woman behind the front registers who had greeted you earlier with bored corporate formality, eyes fixed on her magazine.

Picture of Pre-Seed, taken. Check that one off the list. The only person who you’d want to share a laugh over text about this with is the one person who does not need to know why you’re in the goddamn Family Planning aisle at ten PM. On a Thursday.

At least, not yet. You lock your phone, pocketing it before zeroing in on the purple and green-themed Plan B that boasts One Tablet, One Step.

Although it’s pricier than some of the other morning-after pills, it’s the only one that you feel fully confident about buying. You give the box a little toss, feeling the next-to-nothing weight of it in your palm. Fifty bucks for a tiny pill, one that you may not even end up using- but you’ll be goddamned if you’re caught unprepared.

“Can I help you find anything?”

Your blood flashes cold, then hot, as you realize who the voice belongs to- attention focused elsewhere, you didn’t hear Eddie sidling up the aisle until now.

He’s leaning into his arm on the nearest shelf, grinning wolfishly at his own joke, chocolate eyes lit up at having found you here. He looks obscene- biceps and chest bulging at the stretched fabric of his t-shirt, hair unspooling dark curls from a low bun, black ink tattoos rippling over his bare forearms and peeking out from beneath his collar.

Honestly, you don’t know why he wasn’t stopped at the door by the woman on night shift. He’s bordering public indecency with those fitted Levi’s alone.

Fortunately the shock of hearing Eddie’s low voice is not enough to send the Plan B in your hand flying- too late to reshelve it without him seeing, you cling to it tighter, plastic creaking under your grip as you pray to every god ever that he doesn’t notice.

“Oh! Hey. Hi. Haha, very funny.” Well, that was smooth, but at least you said something comprehensible. “What’re you doing here?”

Eddie doesn’t seem to notice anything amiss, using his free arm to reach for a pack of condoms near your head- “Late night shopping. Stocking up for the weekend. Can’t seem to keep these around, seeing as I’m being fucked out of house and home.”

”Well… apartment,” you correct, heart leaping at the smile lines that jump around Eddie’s eyes. This is good, maybe you can just keep him talking and find a second to shove the Plan B into a random spot or perhaps launch it into the sun-

Nope, too late. Mid-crinkle, Eddie’s eyes drop to the package in your hand, and you watch his face drop as he processes multiple trains of thought at once.

“Oh, shit. Is that… did we…?”

There’s a pinch between his dark brows, likely running through the last few weeks of your hookups (which have all been protected) and trying to do the mental math; you shake your head, trying to stammer through the flush of embarrassment that’s overtaking your system.

“No, it’s not- not from us. Not from you. I mean…” you trail off, shifting uncomfortably from one sneaker to the other as words hit a jam in your throat.

Eddie’s in a full frown now, pushing off the shelf, standing to his full height, confusion and hurt seeping into his expression, voice quiet and pitched deep- “Is it from someone else?”

“Oh my god.” This was a nightmare, right? You’d like to wake up now. “No, no, not from anyone else. It’s-”

A sharp exhale, a shake of your head, and the words loosen all at once- “I was gonna get it for us, for me, for this weekend, if you wanted to give me a reason to use it.”

Eddie goes as still as you’ve ever seen him before, fingers stopped in their usual constant tapping, blinking at the box in your hands.

His face smooths.

Then he smiles.

Your stomach flips.

Eddie slides the condoms back into the wrong spot, not bothering to look as he leans in close enough for you to smell the spice of his cologne as he says in a sex-dipped timbre: “Well if you wanted me to fill you up with my cum, why didn’t you just say so?”

A horrified, awkward squawk escapes before you can bite it back; your head whips down the aisle to make sure no one else was within earshot of his dirty mouth as you blindly shove the Plan B away, deep into a shelf. “Oh my god. Jesus christ.”

”Eddie is just fine,” he responds mildly, the cool demeanor to your rapidly heating one as his grin simmers wicked between dimpled cheeks.

“Forget it,” you start, shaking your head and making to brush past, embarrassment flooding in hot, “Just forget-”

Eddie catches you by the elbow, effectively locking you in place with a single move, but he’s not looking at you; with his free hand, he snaps up the slightly crumpled box and scans the words.

“Y’think one will be enough?”

The flood subsides, gives you pause enough to stutter out, “W-what?”

Eddie’s fingers flex on your arm. He turns the box over in his big hand, rings glinting. “We’d better get two. Just in case.”

Your skin feels the impression of his palm even after he lets go, like a Polaroid in rapid reverse as he grabs a second box, warmth fading fast from your skin. “I don’t think- I mean, that’s not how they work, I should probably find a more permanent sol-”

“Just for the weekend.” His eyes are back on you now, self-satisfied smirk giving way to something darker, more intense. “Yeah?”

A shiver casts goosebumps down the length of your body. He’s goddamn toying with you, in the middle of a fucking CVS. Despite your flare of irritation, you nod, voice nearly a croak as you echo, “Yeah.”

The grin lights up his face again. “Good girl.”

Eddie doesn’t give you time to react to this (verbally, anyways- your cunt is most certainly responding to the praise despite your best efforts to remain unaffected), using one large hand to hold both boxes and another to press at the small of your back, leading you down the aisle.

Truthfully, you’re grateful for the help (regardless of his dominance-based tendencies that don’t usually get you this easy); based on the ringing in your ears, you’re doubtful of your own ability to navigate the maze of aisles.

Eddie walks you both to the front register, and you watch as if outside of your own body while the cashier scans the barcodes and Eddie swipes his card.

He pockets the receipt, slides a finger through the handles of the plastic bag, and holds it out between your bodies. Right in front of the goddamn cashier.

”For you.”

This brings you back to yourself, a bit, mortification giving way to annoyance (a much more useful emotion in this scenario), and you snatch it to your chest. It’s your turn to grab Eddie’s elbow, half-dragging him towards the exit.

“Come again soon,” the cashier calls, still in monotone.

So close. You’re less than a yard away from the sliding glass doors that would have swallowed Eddie’s reply- but as it stands, he gets in one last cheerful wave, an award-winning, dimple-charmed smile to match his bright response.

“She will!”

Damn him. You give a final tug and you’re both out in the parking lot, glass doors closing automatically with a whoosh behind you, cool night air kissing at your cheeks.

”Seriously?” You’re mature enough to recognize that your anger is misplaced, adrenaline-fueled, but that doesn’t stop you from whirling on Eddie, giving his shoulder a sharp shove that (unfortunately, tantalizingly) doesn’t move him an inch. “I can never return to this fucking store. Thanks for that.”

Eddie really doesn’t help his case, grin turned shit-eating as he rustles through his various pockets for his pack of cigarettes- “Careful, sweetheart- you know how hot and bothered I get when you’re mad.”

”Unbelievable.” You turn on a swift heel, slipping the bag loops up your arm to dig for your keys. “You just got me blacklisted from our local drugstore and you don’t even care.”

There’s the snick of a lighter behind you, while your car a few spaces down chirrups and blinks in response to the furious press of your fob’s unlock button.

Eddie chuckles, sardonic and unsympathetic. “Too bad this is the only CVS in the whole world. I think you’ll live, princess.”

Ignoring this, you stomp towards your car, petulant, bag rustling; the door is half-open when Eddie calls, “So, are you coming over tonight, or what?”

“Obviously!”

The door slams with more force than you intend, sound ricocheting across the lot.

From the respite of your tinted windows, you watch as a streetlamp-haloed Eddie takes a drag from a cigarette, smoke drifting thick around a hazy visage of the hottest man alive. (Maybe you’re a touch biased. But your opinion is based on personal accounts, so fuck the naysayers.)

He tips his head back to look at the stars, pale column of throat illuminated- with a flush of realization, you scoff. He’s putting on a show for you.

Two can play, you think, driving your seatbelt into place with a click. But first I’m gonna have to make a stop at home. Namely for new undies.

[sleepynoons]

sakura x afab!f!reader, sfw, not beta read

cw: n/a

notes: in celebration of summer coming to a close (how the heck is it back to school season already in the states...), i wrote this quick drabble on taking sakura to a summer festival. packed w/ a bunch of classic shojo tropes + a sprinkle of humor lol enjoy!!

SAKURA DIDN’T think this through. his excuse is that it all happened too quickly.

one late afternoon after school, he and suo accompanied nirei to a local market, who unexpectedly won a couples travel package to an onsen in a street-side raffle. since nirei doesn’t have a special someone, he gave it to sakura, thinking it was about time the two of you went on a trip together. suo only added fuel to the fire by bringing up the fact that sakura hadn’t kissed you yet in fear of screwing your first kiss as a couple up.

he really only agreed to go on the trip because he was baited into it. 

he sighs, peeking at you through his periphery as you clearly vibrate in your seat, admiring the mountainous landscape speeding by as you both ride the bullet train. 

the sight of your excitement and anticipation makes him sigh. fine, he admits, maybe he had other reasons for coming on this trip.

you swivel over, beaming up at him. “sakura!” you chirp. “what should we do tonight?”

he rolls his eyes. he knows that whenever you ask him this question, you usually already have an idea or two in mind. but he plays along anyway.

“nothing,” he grumbles. he tries to meet your gaze, but just sharing eye contact for a few mere seconds turns him into a blustering mess.

you hum happily, tuning out his grumpiness. “i heard there’s a summer festival! it’s close to our stay. wanna go?”

sakura simply rests his cheek on his propped fist with an expression that reads “do i really have a choice?”.

elated, you clap your hands and peer out the window again.

an hour later, the two of you arrive in a small town known for its onsens, even during the summer. it’s already seven o’clock, and having already eaten bento boxes on the train, the two of you head straight to the inn. sakura thanks his lucky stars that there’s a divider in the room because there’s no way he can sleep right next to you. you, however, are clearly disheartened at the sight, but sakura makes up some half-assed lie (“i’m a sleep walker, so it’s better that i don’t accidentally step on you!”) to appease you. anyway, after stowing away your belongings, you head out to grab some water.

in reality, though, you leave to prepare a small surprise for sakura. you know your boyfriend can’t say no to you, and he’s too busy snoozing on the tatami to know how long you’ll be gone. having done your research ahead of time, you found out about the summer festival yourself, and there is a yukata rental store nearby as well. not only will this be sakura’s first summer festival with you, but he also hasn’t seen you dressed up. you want to dazzle your boyfriend so hard that he nearly faints on the spot. you giggle at your mischievous antics and quickly make your way to the store.

sakura wakes with a jolt. how long has he been out for? he aimlessly searches for his phone, slapping his hand against the floor around his head until he feels the cool metal in his hands.

his eyes widen at the time. he was asleep for a whole half hour. he looks around – and where are you? it shouldn’t take you this long to get some water.

as if on cue, his phone beeps with a notification from you. you sent him a short text message: “wake up!! i’m already waiting outside the inn!!” sakura scrambles to put on a light jacket and his shoes, mussing with his hair as he speeds over to you.

when he’s outside, you’re nowhere in sight. there’s a family of four including a mother strapping a baby into a stroller, an elderly couple walking by, and a girl wearing a summer yukata – wait, is that you?”

you look over your shoulder, and sakura thinks time has stopped. the world has ceased rotating on its axis. there is no one and nothing else in the world except for the two of you. he zeroes in on your outfit, admiring how the colors and patterns contrast yet fit together seamlessly, complementing your skin tone. your hair is also done into a neat bun with decorative floral pins and embellishments. and your face. he’s not well-versed in makeup, but he at least knows what lipstick is, and the soft pink painting your lips is tantalizing. his first instinct is to kiss you.

but the instantaneous, almost primal thought catches him off-guard, and everything resumes. you’e watching him curiously, waiting for him to come to your side. sakura blushes and scowls, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets, before stalking over to you.

you roll your eyes (internally very delighted by his initial reaction) and ask, “why are you in such a bad mood? woke up wrong?”

your boyfriend sputters, trying to find his words, before responding, “why the hell are you wearing those shoes? can’t walk anywhere with those on.” 

“hey, the sandals go with the outfit!” sakura’s scowl only deepens, his eyebrows and forehead scrunched up even tighter. you flick him lightly before taking one of his hands into yours, leading him to the summer festival.

the festival is the busiest at this time. the fireworks display is occurring in an hour and a half, and families, couples, and friend groups alike are hustling and bustling about. you and sakura go to as many of the game booths as you can. for once, sakura’s grateful that you’re such a busybody because the games are a great way to get his mind off of you and how pretty you are. at one stall, he shoots down four objects in a row to win you a black cat plushie that you say reminds you of him. at another, you both struggle to fish water balloons, and after failing all five of his attempts, sakura throws his metal hook on the ground and calls it quits after being called a loser by one of the children playing next to him. finally, as the two of you near the end of the stalls, you make one last stop. it’s a narrow booth selling candy apples, and the lights strung onto the makeshift roof make the red glaze and plastic wrapping glitter like crystals. even sakura pauses to stare, and you decide to purchase one. you don’t think sakura’s had one before.

he objects at first, slightly leaning back as you hold it out to him. “huh? you didn’t have to, i can’t finish it all.”

you huff and only shove the candy apple closer to him. “i already bought it, and we can just share it.”

just when he has finally distracted his mind from solely thinking about kissing you, you pull this stunt on him. he chokes, barely muttering a “whatever,” and grabs one of your arms to pull you away from the booth.

despite the packed crowd, the two of you manage to squeeze into a small, unoccupied patch of grass on the field for the fireworks. the fireworks are starting in five minutes, and in the meantime, he unwraps the candy apple, ready to nibble away at it.

sakura seems to like it, you observe, as you gaze at him adoringly. you’re glad that he seems relaxed and is having fun, even if he still gets shy around you. it’s ok, though, because you’ll help him with that.

one more minute. your boyfriend asks if you’d like to have some, stuttering and tripping over his words. you chuckle, urging him to continue eating.

thirty more seconds. you wipe away some of the stickiness smudging his chin.

ten more seconds. sakura is fully occupied with the candy apple, completely oblivious with the way the crowd is stirring with anticipation.

five.

four.

three.

two.

sakura opens his mouth wide.

and one. he bites down, and you lean over, placing a chaste peck on his cheek. the first firework booms in the background, and as you sit back up, he blinks owlishly at you.

sakura could care less about the fireworks, the countless people surrounding you all, even the sugary treat in his hands. did you just… kiss him? because he wants to do it for real. he wants to make the first move, lick away at the gloss on your lips, confirm his suspicions that you are as sweet – possibly sweeter – than any dessert he’s had. he’s not even bothered by how ridiculous his wants are.

he’s going to do it. he’s going to go for it. oh, wait, he has to ask if you’re ok with him kissing you. right, right.

but as sakura’s about to speak, he forgets that a chunk of candy apple is still in his mouth. he bites down on his tongue, squawking before cringing and curling in on himself from the pain.

you watch as all of this unfolds right beside you. you can’t help but laugh loudly at your boyfriend’s clumsiness. through gritted teeth, he tells you to shut it, but you continue to giggle as you rest your head on his shoulder.

“it’s ok, sakura, we can take our time,” you say into his blushing ears. he replies with something you can’t hear over the fireworks, probably something snarky and not at all serious, but doesn’t make an effort to shake you off.

you think sakura’s already improved considerably tonight, and you’re looking forward to seeing how he’ll act throughout the rest of your trip.

[thewriterghost]

Lovely!!!! Would you write something about Bucky x reader/ friend who moved to another state for work? They used to be really close and talk a lot but as things go with life and distance they drifted a part a bit? But maybe from time to time she’ll think she’ll see him from behind or a side profile walking home at night and think of him and send him a “thinking of you / we should catch up! text not realizing that from time to time that who she saw was Bucky. He will check in on her and see how she’s doing in her new life

Hello!! I'm so sorry, this is so late 😭 between school and internship I hardly got any time to write. In fact, I wrote this at work lol, hopefully you like it! Let me know what you think!

Summary: You moved away from the compound because of school. It's been a lonely few months now. That's definitely the reason you think you're seeing Bucky from the corner of your eye every time you look around, right?

An autumn breeze catches you off guard, right when you are leaving your school building for the day. It was warmer during the day, you think as you walk to your bus stop. It's a lonely time of day, an orange glow of sunlight illuminates the empty bus stop.

As you make it a point to crash every red or yellow leaf you see on your way without being too obvious, out of the corner of your eye you catch a glimpse of a familiar metallic glow. That same feeling you always get around him, the butterflies and the hippos come back to your stomach, making your heart beat a million times a moment. Your eyes snap towards it, but it disappears all too fast for you to spot, leaving you with disappointment and longing.

You miss him. You try not to, but it's not easy not talking to him everyday like you did before, not being able to hang out on 3 am when both of you are too stubborn to go to sleep, or not being able to just exist at the same place at the same time with various animals in your stomach (figuratively).

You grab your phone from your pocket and click on his name on your messaging app. You hand hovers over the text box for a while, until you decide to just write to him. It's not like you haven't been talking since you left, it's more like you didn't want to talk all too much because of how much you'd want to just drop everything and go to him. Still, you think, enough is enough.

"Hey, you busy?"

You wait for a moment, anxiously nibbling on your lower lip. It doesn't take him more than 60 seconds to write back.

"Nope. You?"

You write back, biting down a smile.

"Nope. Just got out of school, going home."

You can almost hear his grumble-ish answers through your phone. A message pops up.

"Isn't it late? I thought you got off at 4."

You must've told him your schedule, but your mind doesn't come up with a memory to support it. You shrug it off and type.

"Yeah, I had to make a presentation and I was the last one of the class so the professor just agreed to do it now rather than next week."

"Does that mean you're free next week?"

You can't help but smile brightly. Looks like you're not the only one missing the other.

"Does that mean you miss me?"

You can almost see his scoff. You giggle to yourself.

"Does that mean we can meet?" He answers. You jump at the opportunity almost too fast.

"Yeah, sure. When are you free?"

"Whenever you're free."

"You don't have a mission or anything?"

"I'll bail." His answer makes you laugh out loud, maybe the first sincere laugh since you've been here.

"If it's not going to be a trouble for you."

"It won't. When should I pick you up?"

You check your schedule on your mind. You would be free tomorrow afternoon.

"Tomorrow afternoon? 2-ish maybe?"

"Sounds good."

You contemplate on whether to write it or not, but then think why not and type.

"I missed you, you know." And you put the phone on your pocket, face starting to burn up.

Your phone buzz, and you get the phone out faster than light.

"I missed you too." Your eyes glance over the letters more than once, each time smiling even more, until you find yourself giggling to yourself at 6 pm on an empty bus stop.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Another text appears on your screen, leaving you happier that you've ever been since the last few months.

Next day goes too slow for your taste. You keep finding yourself shaking your knee up and down with anticipation.

You are out of the door when the clock hits 2 pm. As you arrive at the school gates you realize you haven't told him where to come. You pull out your phone to type, but stop at your tracks when you hear it.

"Hey."

Sitting on a black motorcycle, blue eyes and black jacket catches you off guard. A smile creeps on to your lips.

"Hey." You return the sentence as you find your feet and move towards him. He has a gentle smile as well, uncharacteristically for him as people would say, but not for you. You've seen him like this before. When you were up all night and baked not one, not two, but three batches of cookies together, you've seen that same smile everytime your eyes have met. Or that one time when it was raining too hard and you were too sick to go to mission, and he stayed to look after you, cuddling you since he can't get sick because of serum.

He takes your helmet from the back and after looking at you with that sweet smile of his for a moment, he puts it on for you, clipping it with delicate movements.

"Hop on." He instructs and you obey, hugging him from behind with a pair of red cheeks which thankfully can't be seen thanks to your helmet.

As he takes off, you don't bother to ask where to. After a brief 10-15 minutes, he stops in front of a small cafe near a park.

"Were you around here yesterday?" You ask, recalling the silver glimmer you saw yesterday evening.

"I was on a mission." He shrugs.

"Huh." You mumble. Seeing his puzzled look, you add. "I thought I saw you yesterday, after school. Right before I texted you, in fact."

"You must've missed me a lot." He smirks, opening the door to the cafe for you. Always a gentleman.

"Must've." You return the smile as you walk in.

As you both get your coffees and pastries, you decide to ignore the fact that he probably was here yesterday. In fact, he probably was around since you moved here. Watching out for you, worrying about you, missing you.

"What are you smiling about?" You come back to real life when he gently nudges your shoulder with his.

"Oh, nothing." You shake your head. "I was just thinking, we should meet more often. It's been too long."

"Yeah, agreed." He replies with a smile of his own. You don't realize the look in his eyes, confirming your theory.

[suddencolds]

sending u a star!! ⭐️ sorry i wanted to go thru and pick a specific fic but im too sleepy lol but any yvescent piece u had thoughts on :D

[from Fanfic Writers - Director's Cut]

hello!!! THANK YOU N, IT MADE ME REALLY HAPPY TO RECEIVE THIS 🥹🥹🥹

I also realize am responding to this like 2 months late :') I thought for a long time on which fic to comment on, and now that I've posted Atypical Occurrence pt. 2, I thought I might as well write out my thoughts on it while they're still fresh and bc it's close to my heart (I hope that's okay hehe)

—

⚠️❗️ Warning that I will be attaching snippets from my deleted drafts below!! Please read the published installment before you proceed to read this post. This is a little embarrassing... all I can say is that those drafts were deleted for a reason 🥴

—

There’s a grocery store that’s a ten minute drive from Vincent’s apartment. 

I rewrote this scene... 3 or 4 times? It gave me sooo much trouble 😭 I think in the first draft Vincent actually tears up tasting Yves's cooking. (I know, Vincent, I want Yves to cook for me too 😭❗️)

Terrible (ugh 😭) first draft screenshot under the cut (screenshot = old draft, indented quote = current draft):

(Yves pulling up a chair at the end... you can tell he is totally at a loss on what to do 😭 and I, too, was at a loss on what to do)

I wrote this ^, and I was like... this moment just feels unearned? I personally despise outlining + I love going in (mostly) blind. Sometimes the first draft works out of the box, and in this case, the first draft (and the second draft, and the third draft) were all soooo bad that I literally had to take a month-long break to regain my confidence 😭

Anyways! I knew right away that Y was going to cook something for V (it's mentioned here and there throughout the series that he is a really good cook 😭 And in part 3 of Fool Me Twice, Yves promises to make Vincent something more ambitious than hot chocolate. He's finally kept his promise now, 12 installments later 🙇‍♀️ )

From draft 2, there was only one scene which I was sure I was going to include in the final draft, aka, spared from the recycling bin. (But I just checked the final draft and it's nowhere to be seen?? Interesting.)

I would have managed fine on my own.

On this (deleted) scene, and more broadly: I think it's important to me that Yves recognizes that Vincent is self-sufficient in many ways: when Vincent says he will be fine alone, he is telling the truth. Yves doesn't have to stay—he recognizes this too, when he heads for the door in the published draft.

Still, Yves stays, of course—initially, because he insists, and later, because Vincent asks :)

“…You won’t leave unless I eat, then,” Vincent says. He says it evenly enough that it barely registers as a question. Yves smiles at him. It’s not a wrong conclusion. “Exactly,” he says.

It was really, really fun writing the differences between caretaker!Vincent (in Fool Me Twice pt. 5) and caretaker!Yves 😊 I usually don't like to say too much on the end of character analysis, bc I like my work to be interpreted as it is: the text is canon, and everything I'm saying here is just me yapping on about my headcanons. (I have been roasted for saying this by a dear friend of mine, probably rightfully so:)

With that disclaimer: Vincent to me (I can only speculate, etc) is a very no-bullshit caretaker (he likes to enforce whatever will lead most directly to the person's recovery; he actually worries a lot, but his worry often manifests as frustration/snappishness), whereas Yves is a lot more permissive and, for the most part, manages his stress—he is the eldest sibling, after all! I think he does what he can to make it a more tolerable experience :)

“So this is just a Yves thing.” “What? Showing consideration for my friends?”  “Showing consideration is one thing,” Vincent answers. “You could have left after dropping off the files. You would still have been showing your consideration.” “I guess that’s true. But at that point, I was already here,” Yves says, with a shrug. “It seemed logical to check up on you.” “Well, now you’ve checked up on me,” Vincent says. “So you can go.” Yves supposes this is true.

Vincent takes things very literally (and I think he's actually quite aware of the social niceties around these kinds of things, which is in part why he is so skeptical to assume that Yves means anything more.)

There’s a hand on his sleeve, tugging. Yves goes very still. When Vincent notices what he’s done, alarm flashes through his expression, and he pulls his hand away as if he’s burned.  “Sorry,” he murmurs, again. And just like that, he’s back to how he always is—his expression perfectly, carefully neutral, in a way that can only be constructed. “I’m sorry.” But Yves doesn’t forget what he’s seen. “You can go.”

This scene means a lot to me!! It took a loooot of editing to hammer into place (the doc I wrote it on is titled "fixing this scene would FIX ME" haha). I think this is the first time Vincent has actively sought out Yves's comfort 😭 And he regrets it almost as soon as he's said it, because he does not do things without a good justification, and wanting something—even wanting it badly—does not feel like a sufficient justification to him. But give Yves an inch and he will take a mile!! He will take a hundred miles!! That is just the kind of person that Yves is.

I was talking with some friends previously about how I wanted to write Vincent reaching out for Yves. How I wanted Vincent to, through the haze of fever, cross a line that he'd previously not allowed himself to cross :') I think it is a time-old trope to have someone, in their feverish delirium, utter something embarrassing and utterly uncharacteristic of them, or divulge something that has been difficult for them to say.

This whole time drafting, I was thinking, how can I set up a moment like that and have it feel earned? How badly would he have to be feeling? What kind of setup would justify getting past his 590859 mental defenses? (I do not like to outline, but sometimes I do have an emotional beat that I have in mind, and then I have to work backwards to figure out the setup. This took SO much working back from, and I really thought about it for very long). I was almost sure that Vincent would regret it immediately after too 😭

Yves opens his arms out in offering, tries on a smile. “I’ve been told I give good hugs. Good enough to cure all ailments, obviously.”

Ahh, so Y offering V a hug is inspired by a fic I read 6 years ago, where a character offers another a hug as a joke and then the other character surprises them by taking it. Yves is really offering here, but I think he recognizes that joking about it will make it easier for Vincent to accept 😭

Yves has hugged a fair share of people in his life. He doesn’t think he’d be able to list them all if he were asked to. It’s different, though, being so close to Vincent—so close that Yves can reach out and let his hair fall through his fingertips. He can lift up his palm and feel the rigid line of his spine, the slope of his shoulders; he could reach out and trace the dip of his wrist, the form of his hand. Vincent’s chin digs slightly into his left shoulder. His nose is turned slightly into Yves’s neck—like this, he is almost perfectly still. Yves can feel the warm brush of air against his neck whenever Vincent exhales. He is so close that Yves is afraid, for a moment, that he might hear how badly his heart is racing.

I have nothing to say about this paragraph except that I edited it for like 40 minutes straight.

Last thing!!

“We had a habit of keeping the heat off, in the winters, and closing the windows.”

The scene near the end (where Vincent tells Yves about his childhood) is actually the scene which came the most easily to me. I also did not write it last; I jumped around. It took me around 1.5 hours. (By comparison, simply editing the scene before it took 11 😵‍💫)

I did always intend for Vincent to disclose... well, /something/ about himself. (You can tell that when I plan, that's really as far as I plan LOL)

Anyways, when Vincent wakes Yves up (after Yves falls asleep at his desk), I initially wrote it so that Yves wakes Vincent from a nightmare.

But (as direct a link to vulnerability as that might have been,) Vincent would not talk about his nightmare 😭 So I switched gears.

I also specifically wanted to write about Vincent's experience being cared for growing up. I think something that's culturally resonant with me (as an Asian American, and the eldest daughter to immigrant parents) is like, the ways families can and cannot say I love you—the quiet things that are done in place of a more direct expression of it. The way that while unspoken consideration can speak volumes, it can just as easily be invisible. But even now, writing this post, I feel like it's difficult for me to untangle the feelings and experiences I've had into something that feels sufficiently multifaceted.

Vincent has a different childhood from I do (it is probably worth noting that I do not project onto any of my characters, nor do I use them as a vessel to get my own experiences across). I think I'm just drawn to writing tricky/non-straightforward expressions of love, in general :) Sometimes that is the kind of love that resonates with me most.

[eveandtheturtles]

Massage

Yay, this one is finally donezooo. This was a request from.... I don't remember who, I'm very sorry but it's past midnight on Sunday night and I need to get to shower and sleep REALLY soon. Enjoy y'all! And lemme know if I did any good lol Reblog! Don't repost!

Tag for: @madammuffins @turtle-babe83 @thelaundrybitch @pheradream15 @dilucsflame33 @sharpwindow (anyone else who wants on this list let me know!)

Rating: E, like Explicit. Like Eyyy, this is some smut!

Pairing: Leo x fem!Reader.

Summary: You were stressed, Leo got ideas.

You were stressed and anxious. It was nearing the end of the finals, your job was trying to cram more shifts into your already busy schedule and your old ass mattress wasn’t helping you get proper sleep. On top of that your vigilante boyfriend was busy trying to bust some gang operations in the city. It all resulted in you being a bit more on the cranky side.

You tried to stay strong, it soon should all clear out and you’ll get your long overdue cuddles. Yeah, you could do that.

You pulled your headphones back on and tried to focus on the text. When 10 minutes later a bottle of soda got placed in front of you you jumped up a little turning to see who the intruder was.

“Leo!” You exclaimed tearing your headphones off of your head. Immediately you stood up and wrapped your arms around his neck. “I missed you so much.”

Leo leaned down to make it easier for you but his hands were a bit too busy holding pizza and a plastic bag of snacks to hug you back. 

“We bagged the baddies early, I thought I might surprise you,” he said and you two kissed sweetly.

“So thoughtful.” You chuckled relaxing against him for a second, then you snatched the pizza. “What did you get?” You opened the box all giddy. The smell reminded you you haven’t really eaten in the past couple of hours. Truly, Leo had the best timing. “Pepperoni!” You answered your own question and he huffed a little laugh.

Soon you both were on your bed with your laptop in his lap as you watched some new Netflix show. You were only half watching, enjoying how his fingers felt over your shoulder and neck while he stroked your skin absentminded. His cheek was resting over the top of your head and he’d kiss you from time to time. He really enjoyed the texture of your hair.

You tried to snuggle even closer despite almost laying on top of him but the angle you chose was a bit off and your back decided it will not have that.

You hissed and sat up.

“What’s wrong?” Instantly, Leo was alert.

“It’s just my back. It’s been difficult couple weeks,” you explained. “Not - crime-fighting, life-risking difficult but y’know.”

“Hey, don’t sell yourself so short, okay?” He frowned. “Just because we deal with different things doesn’t make it more or less hard. Let me see.” He coaxed you gently to turn your back to him.

“Is this going to be the bit of a sexy massage montage?” You joked and then hissed as he pressed his finger to a particularly hard knot on your back.

“Nope.”

“Aww…”

He was right. It wasn’t, it hurt like hell before it felt good. And when it felt good you quickly fell asleep. Then Monday rolled by you wrote your exams and the week just blurred until it was the weekend again. 

You finished your shift at work and were about to head back home when your Donnie-issued cellphone dinged with a new text. From your boyfriend. You smiled and opened it.

FearlessInBlue: "Do you have time tonight?"

You wondered what he could be planning. 

"Yeah, what's up?"

FearlessInBlue: "Drop by the lair. Everyone will be out."

A thrill bloomed deep low inside your belly. 

"I'll be there in 3 hours?" 

FearlessInBlue: "Awesome."

You raced to your place to get ready and then to get to the lair. You looked around and confirmed that indeed everyone was out.

“You’re early.”

You almost jumped out of your skin when you heard Leo’s voice right next to your ear. You spun around to face him and felt a rush of blood to your head. The way Leo was looking at you was simply dangerous. The intense blue gaze eyed you head to toe, hungry.

“Y-yeah.” You swallowed hard. “So, um- where is everyone?”

“They all went to watch a game,” he said. His body swayed a little as he wrapped one arm around your waist. “I said I had plans with you.” He pulled you close and nipped at your ear.

“O-oh.” You bit your lips.

“Come on.”

He pulled you with him to his room. When you stepped inside it you let out a deep sigh. It looked so intimate. Leo placed some loose red fabrics on the walls and lit up candles giving the room a soft glow. There were rose petals scattered around; elegant, white bottles, towels; a brown, mystery basket and soft pillows all of it around the centerpiece that was the mattress. The room also felt warmer than usual.

Leo stood behind you, his hands on your arms, and he kissed your shoulder.  

“You did all this?”

“I just ran with your idea,” he admitted with a low chuckle.

“Sexy massage?” You raised your eyebrow, amused.

“Sexy massage,” he nodded sagely.

You both smiled, Leo breaking character a little, as you pulled him further in with you. 

“Will you help me undress then?” You wrapped his arms around his middle looking up at him.

“I was planning to, yes.” He leaned down for a sweet kiss.

His wandering hands were already attempting to remove your shirt. You parted but held each other's gaze. The shirt slipped off of you to the floor. Next, Leo knelt down in front of you. He kissed your bare stomach, while his hands slipped around your waist. Off went your bottoms and underwear. His palms glided down your legs and took off your shoes.

Your breath hitched watching him work. The gentle way he moved made you feel like a deity. Worshipped.

“Lay down,” he whispered. “On your stomach.”

You obeyed and waited. 

Leo moved on his knees closer to the mattress. He opened the basket first. You eyed him curiously. The very first thing that came out of it was a feather. He tickled your ear and you giggled. He smiled softly and trailed it over your shoulder blades, down your spine, setting pleasant shivers in your body. The feather ghosted over the small of your back, circled each of your cheeks and down your legs. Your toes curled a little as he did all that and managed to make it so sensual. 

You certainly wouldn't be falling asleep any time soon.

Next he took one of the white, ceramic bottles and some kind of liquid dripped onto his hand. He worked it between his fingers for a moment, warming it up. You were getting excited just by watching him. So focused on his task. He noticed your look and huffed a chuckle. 

“What?” He asked.

“I love you.” You smiled

“I didn’t do anything yet.” He shook his head but leaned down to kiss your head. “Let me know if you ever feel uncomfortable, okay?”

“Okay,” you agreed.

Soon you felt him touch your back, slowly working your back muscles. From your shoulders moving down. The gentle kneading, the way the heel of his palm and fingers were undoing all those kinks you got over the week. The oil made it all smoother, the repeated motions warming you up.

“Mmm, god you are so good at this,” you sighed.

“Thank you. This is just a start," He promised. 

That's when he slipped over your ass. The thumb and forefinger spread pressing over the cheeks and going down. Then with a stronger grip of his whole hands. 

You let out a soft groan. It was getting to the good part. You felt his nails getting in on the action with gentle scratches over your skin. 

"Turn around," he told you and you eagerly did so. 

Now you had a much better view of him as he began to massage your arms. The slow, circular motion was turning your bones into goop. Then he got to your hands. A gentle press of his thumb, a kiss on each knuckle. He basically studied and explored your hand. And then sucked on a digit. His eyes were on you with such intensity… the way he slowly took your finger in his mouth, the sensation- you couldn't help but moan. 

A victorious, lustful smirk bloomed on his mouth. 

"Tease," you jokingly complained.

"That is the point." He said, proud of himself.

Then he repeated his magic on your other arm. 

Next, his thumbs rubbed over your clavicle, loosening the muscle there. You were already feeling like putty in his hands but were not protesting. You shivered as his hands slid down between your breasts. With the back of his fingers and knuckles, he circled lightly over them, stroking the undersides then squeezing them lightly. Always avoiding the hardened, dark peaks of your breast. You whimpered and shakily inhaled. 

He continued to tease for a minute, two, it stretched into infinity. Your nipples stiff almost painfully from the anticipation. You groaned, impatient.

"Leo."

"Shh," he shushed you. "Patience."

But he rewarded you. When he lightly pinched them between his knuckles, you moaned loudly. He lowered his mouth, helping himself to you. 

Feeling the rough texture of his tongue on you, you arched and cried out. Your oiled fingers tried to grip on his head but you kind of slipped. 

He chuckled, then took your hands then placed them back down. 

"No touching, sweetheart~" he kissed you sweetly and you whined in protest as he moved away.

"Fiiiiine."

He moved back down, slowly rolling your nipples between his fingers, pinching and pulling. He tested different strengths and watched your reactions. He implemented his tongue, slowly rubbing it over the stiffened peaks, making your toes curl. You were panting, gripping onto the fabric underneath you. 

Regretfully in your opinion, he moved away from your breast. Now it was time to knead your sides. He tickled your belly a little and made you laugh, giving you time to catch your breath in this high-intensity situation. 

You inhaled and exhaled as he positioned himself between your knees. He now was rubbing circled over your hip bones and traced kisses over your underbelly. 

You bit your lips. The next sensation was his nails lightly scratching the insides of your thighs. The knowledge of how close he was to your sex built up the anticipation further. You suspected that you were going to fall apart the moment he'd touch you there.

Leo could see the wet stain you created on the sheets and felt incredibly proud of himself. You were shivering with pleasure under his touch. All he did to you was making you breathless and the thought of that just swelled inside him. 

"You're gorgeous," he said and kissed your thigh. "You're like my personal deity." He kissed the other one. "I wish to worship you every day of my life."

You moaned hearing his honeyed words.

"Leo… please."

"As you wish," he said and kissed your nether lips, making you jump a little. 

Gosh!

He was definitely taking his time, frustrating you further. You could feel your core just scream for him already. His tongue, his finger, his cock. 

"Just fill me up," you whined but he didn't obey. 

He licked over your folds, then kissed over them. His tongue slowly pried them open to trace the edges. You realized he was tracing his name over you. Each letter was precisely licked and engraved over you. L, E, O, N, A, R, D, O. With one hand up he reached up to your breast, to tease it while he worked. 

Then with the tip of his tongue, he rubbed the seam between your clit and entrance. He put more pressure in there, movements rougher. He was tracing the now sensitive muscles that led inside you and you begged the gods for him to breach it. You were so fucking close. 

He didn’t. Instead, his mouth wandered up again. Wrapped around your pearl and gently sucked.

You cried out, your legs wrapped around his head, locking him in a tight prison and you wouldn’t let go. What’s more important he didn’t. He continued to stroke and suck on your clit, stronger, harder, with a vicious purpose. Your body was victoriously wrecked with wave after wave of orgasm. You didn’t even know you were crying out until you stopped, whimpering helplessly and your throat burned.

You laid there before him, completely boneless, head empty, twitching and whimpering when he pulled back as he gently pried your legs from around his neck.

He must have seen something in your eyes because he hovered over you and gently kissed you. His whole beak was soaked in you and you could taste herself on his tongue.

You couldn’t talk. You were just in pure bliss.

“Was it good?” He asked and you nodded. “Good,” he chuckled with a sense of accomplishment and a job well done.

He tried to pull back but you stopped him. A question appeared on his features.

“More,” you managed to utter. Your jelly knee nudged his waist. You were not going to let him sleep after that.

He pushed down his pants, stiff and ready after all that he did to you. He laid between your legs and slowly pushed himself in. 

You moaned, hands going around his neck and nails into his skin. 

“Yeeeessss,” you moaned into his ear. 

Oh, god this was so good. Just to feel him stretch you, fill you. You nearly sobbed you wanted him so close. 

“Don’t let me go,” you begged him. 

“I won’t,” he replied. He remained still for a moment, letting take it all in. Your breath evened out and you nuzzled his cheek.

“Move,” you ordered and he did.

He tried to be slow, but you could tell he wanted to chase his pleasure as well. He was so good to you.

“Please, Leo, fuck me,” you hissed into his ear. Your inner muscles squeezed him tight. You heard him moan and you knew you won this time. He may have still been going slow, but the hard and sharp thrusts were bringing stars into your vision as he bent you in half. Your tights were going to have his imprint on them and you definitely ruined all the fabrics he had gathered for the scene. And by God, you loved every second of it.

Hours later, both of you sweaty and barely conscious, laid on the mattress, entwined together in a way you couldn’t quite tell where you ended and he started. You were so happy.

“So,” you spoke from atop his plastron, “I will rate this massage experience 10/10, will you write me down in your books for another appointment?” 

“Sure, let me just check my calendar,” he replied.

Your eyes met and you both started laughing. You kissed but kept on giggling. Mmm, yes, an experience to repeat for sure.

[1starqi]

Not That Bad

genre: fluff, college!au (you briefly fight with your best friend/old roommate)

pairing: bassist!soobin x student!reader

wc: 1.2k

note: I've never moved anywhere don't come at me for how I wrote it, please. YXA is yesterday x alone lol

(Chapter List)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There had been tension all morning in the apartment you shared with your best friend, Lee Soyoon. Something had been off since you two woke up. When she woke up, she deviated from her usual routine and ate breakfast alone and the rest of the time had been lounging in her room, unseen. Finally, she came out of her room and stood in the doorway to the main room.

“I’m moving out.” She said tentatively. You could almost feel your heart stop. You paused rolling your kimbap lunch, resting it on its red cotton napkin.

You tensed your eyebrows as you looked at her, “What?”

“I’m moving out.” She said it with more conviction this time. “I’m moving in with my boyfriend.” She sounded apologetic, but firm in her decision—unfortunately for you.

“What the hell, Soyoon? You know I can’t afford this apartment alone. Do I really have to find a new roommate?” Your apprehensive question was rhetorical.

“He has a roommate too! He needs somewhere to stay. He can split with you, I’m sure of it.” Right, her boyfriend had to kick out his roommate to live with her too. Rooming with someone you didn’t know wasn’t what you expected this year—not at all. You were excited about girls’ nights and spending the year doing everything together, but that all came crumbling down.

“Are you joking? I’ve never talked to him! I don’t even know his name.” You were almost yelling, now. Your chest rose and fell with a deep breath to console yourself. “I know you like him. I’m sorry for yelling, Soyoon. This is just a big change for me. Give me his number, would you?” You told her. You couldn’t afford to be fighting with your lifeline at your university and also struggling to pay your rent, but you were still mad and processing the change your life was about to undergo.

“It’s Choi Soobin. I’ll text you his number.” She knew you were still mad when you closed your eyes and took another deep breath. Even aside from the obvious signs, she can read your usually bubbly personality like a book. “He’s kind of shy but he’s a sweetheart, I swear. If you don’t become friends you don’t even have to talk.” This would’ve been fine if you weren’t so excited to have someone to talk to all the time.

“Fine.” Ding. You got his number. The pads of your fingers grumpily typed out a message. If you had the power of hindsight then, you might’ve cared to reword the text.

That was how you got to where you are now, waiting for Soobin to finish unloading his last pack of things into the middle of your main room. After you sent him the text, he sent an apologetic one back. With rent coming up so soon, and him having nowhere to go, you figured it was best for him to move in. He seemed shy and reserved, the opposite of what you were looking for, but you told yourself it would do. Your new, scarily tall roommate ducked under the main door, carrying the poster child of a moving-in box—brown, cardboard, and full to the brim. He gives you a slight nod as he comes in.

“Want a tour?” You ask him, wishing for some semblance of human connection. He nods again, but it’s a larger motion this time. “That’s the living room,” You point to your left, his right, “that’s the kitchen,” you point to your right, his left.

“Where’s the open bedroom?” He asks in a soft voice. He seems scared to be in your—now equally his—apartment.

“It’s right over here! Mine is on the right, and yours is on the left. They have the same blueprint.” You tell him, guiding him down the short hallway that ends at the door to the bathroom. “What do you like to do?” You attempt to strike up a conversation.

“Not much. I study a lot.” You were wishing for a more in-depth answer other than studying, but you tell yourself you’ll work with it.

“What’s your major?” You ask him, both standing in the same hallway that Soyoon told you she’d be leaving in and it’s an unwelcome realization of cause and effect.

“Pure math.” You purse your lips and nod, silently asking for him to say more, but he doesn’t. “Um, I’ll tell you if I have any questions. I’m going to set up my room.” He flashes a slight smile that creases the edge of his eyes. His tall figure squeezes past you to get the boxes and haul them into Soyoon’s now-empty room. You watch as he picks up the first box, labeled bass before you turn into your room and shut the door behind you. Does he play bass? Does he just really like fish?

For the rest of the day, you don’t interact with each other. He stays in his room while you mill about the rest of the house. When closing the door, he didn’t know you had to really push it hard to close it (Soyoon would know), and his door is cracked open.

Trying not to be a respectful roommate, you try to walk past as fast as possible. But on your fifth round of walking in and out of your room, something catches your eye in his room. He seems to have unpacked nicely. His room is mostly dark, as he has the shades drawn, but you can see a glint of sunlight reflecting off of his dark mahogany bass—a guitar, not a fish. He’s sitting cross-legged on the carpeted floor, wearing chunky black headphones and a raspberry jam-colored sweater. He’s hunched over a book, maybe a comic book, and has a quarter-full water glass from your kitchen in his hand. He looks up. He looks up. You’ve been staring for too long. 

He pulls one side of the big black headphones off of his ear. “Are you okay?” He asks, voice gravelly from apparent lack of use.

“I was looking at your bass.” You push the door open a little wider to talk to him, it creaks on its hinges.

“Really? What about it?” He sounds suspicious. The way he says it is way out of character for your current impression of him.

“I play guitar so I just think it’s cool.” You shrug.

“You play!?” His eyes light up. It looks like his interest is piqued.

“You didn’t see? My door’s been open all day!” You tell him. His previously aloof atmosphere is gone. It’s like you broke his shell with one sentence in one day. Maybe you should start rethinking your lucky number.

He starts to defend himself, looking giddy, “I wasn’t looking! What kind of guitar do you play?”

“I started off with acoustic, but I play mostly electric these days. I like playing YXA, what about you?” You cock your head slightly at him.

“Did you say YXA?” He’s so excited he takes his headphones off and places them on the (new) patterned carpet under him.

“Yeah, do you know them?” 

“I play their music all the time! I love their music so much.” He’s almost giggling now. It’s really cute to see him fanboy over something when he was so aloof the rest of the day. Here, you realize he’s not actually aloof—he’s just shy around new people. “Want to do a duet sometime? I’ve been itching for a guitarist to play with.”

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad living with him after all.

[suleikashideaway]

All this love for ff8 flying around tumblr right now has got me thinking. 

So many people were so moved by this game that twenty-five years later we’re all banging our fists on the table and crying about it? It leaves me stunned. For so long I thought I was the only one. 

[Huge text post under the cut. As I wrote this I realized just how much soul-baring I was doing. This was emotional to write and just as emotional to share. Thank you to those of you who bravely paved the way with your personal stories so that I would feel strong enough to do the same. Sorry this got stupid-long lol]

My own journey with ff8, as it turns out, is very much tied to my journey in discovering writing. It overwhelms me to think of how my life is so much better thanks to both things. And how my life was potentially saved by both things.

Back in the early aughts I was not privileged enough to have any gaming consoles. My best friend, though, had just gotten a PS1 and the very first game she had was ff8. I would go over to her house every single Sunday afternoon and sit, transfixed, as she played through it. I had never seen anything like it before. We would read the dialogue boxes out loud (I was always Selphie, Zell, and Rinoa, she was always Squall, Irvine, and Quistis) and she was kind enough to save the important cut scenes on separate memory slots so I could see whatever she had played throughout the week. 

I remember adoring the cutesyness of Squall and Rinoa’s dynamic and crying when I saw the ending. But there was something more to it. I felt such an intense desire to have the game for myself, to play it alone and absorb everything in it. We finally got a little money and got a PS1, but my mom would only get games that the whole family could enjoy, so it was Crash and Spyro for a long time until I finally, finally got ff8 for myself. 

The intensity of Squall and Rinoa’s drama and romance was so important to my passionate little teenaged heart. He jumped out into space to save her!! And she brought him back from time compression with just her love!!! It was the story that set the bar for romantic love. 

And Squall…damn, I remember sitting, unblinking, at the scene when he’s curled up in bed…At age sixteen, seventeen, watching Squall voice these things was big:

“I’m fine all by myself now. I have all the skills I need to survive. I’m not a child anymore. That’s a lie. I don’t know anything. I’m confused.”

At the time, I didn’t know why I was so spellbound by that scene, and many of the other scenes of Squall’s inner monologues, but it makes so much sense now. I was a child made to believe I had to be fully competent and capable from way too young an age, parentified and emotionally stunted, and I was about to be kicked out into the world when I didn’t know a single fucking thing about it. 

But my love for ff8 was very private. I read some fanfic to extend that feeling of being in Squall and Rinoa’s world, but other than that, I never outwardly expressed how much this game stuck with me. I was definitely an awkward, shy kid, and luckily I found a group of weirdos in high school who had no fear in sharing their love for things like video games and anime and what-have-you. But still! Even with that! I barely engaged with the few friends who had a love for ff8. It was all very intimate for me. It was my private world. And part of me was scared of taking it too far, even amongst the nerds who took everything too far. I didn’t want to stand out in that way. I had the overwhelming urge to appear normal, and sane. And anyway I didn’t know how to articulate it.

There is a scene from my college years that is so burned in my memory and I think highlights this. I was in a very small major and so I had all the same classes with the same small group of people. In these classes was a very cool girl who I admired. One day someone brought up video games and I remember feeling paralyzed, like, “I can’t bring up my weirdly intense passion for this game! Everyone will think I’m so strange!” so I lied and said I had never played a single video game in my life. And in comes Cool Girl and starts going on and on about how much she loved final fantasy 8 and I could not fathom it. I stayed silent. I was not cool enough to go back on my lie and admit that I was just as into that game, if not more into it, and that I still thought about it regularly.

I kept my love of the game to myself, and played it once or twice when I went home on college breaks. It was enough. I was busy, and burnt out, and turns out, severely depressed on top of it all. 

That first major depressive episode lasted years. I managed to get out of it on my own through a variety of life experiences and found myself in my mid-twenties, looking for love. And what was more, I knew I had to find my Squall. I had to find someone who would constantly be willing to save me from my own flightiness, from my overly-passionate heart that didn’t think things through and constantly caused my own messes, and tell me (with brutal honesty) when to knock my shit off.

And I found him!

What I didn’t know is that I was really Rinoa all along. And Rinoa, my friends, cinnamon roll that she is, has a lot of shit to work out, too. 

It was helpful as I started spiraling into depression again: what if Rinoa and Squall were together and happy, but Rinoa had a major emotional breakdown in her late twenties? I imagined it obsessively. Thinking of their future was the only way I could fall asleep at night. (lol, any of this sound familiar, @angelosearch? <3)

Their story took such a hold on me. I could feel it wanting to scream itself out of my fingertips to the point that I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I started secretly typing it up, and every time I sat at the keys, I felt better.

And I stopped disassociating. I started sleeping better. I stopped hiding in the bathroom to cry at all hours of the day. I stopped thinking that I didn’t deserve to be here. I stopped therapy. 

I felt like I had been given a second chance at life. 

About a year ago, I was finally ready to consider posting my ff8 fanfic to share with the world. I had been writing it for over a year, and brewing it in my head for (get this) about eight years before that.

I could tell, though, that I was not a Good Writer. So I put on my bravest face and went searching for a beta. I immediately found one, my amazing @failed221b-chill, who I’ve gushed about before. And my world blossomed. I discovered the true joy that writing brings me, and even just writing this essay is way better than any therapy session I’ve ever had. 

I’m finally coming into my own. I’m finally realizing I had no reason to hide my passionate self. I have to share my inner world - it’s what makes me who I am, and only in that way can I truly connect with those around me. In fact, I literally went and bought an ff8 tank top and wore it in public yesterday and felt like a fucking superhero for doing so. 

So. All that said. I’m so incredibly grateful to be here in this moment, sharing all this love for a game that clearly has affected so many lives for the better. Happy anniversary, Final Fantasy VIII! And to anyone who read this far, I love you.

[ladyveronikawrites]

SORRY I FORGOT TO SET THIS UP LOL

WIP: Kinktober Edition

COUNTDOWN TO KINKTOBER!

@sitkowski and I need a push to write for kinktober and we want to encourage those participating in Kinktober to do the same!

I will be sharing sneak peeks from both my Motionless in White Fics as well as Bad Omens- any and all kinktober related fics are welcome to participate!

MIW Kinktober 2024

Bad Omens Kinktober 2024

HOW IT WORKS (rules modified):

In a reblog of this post (so people can find you in the notes) or new thread (w/ rules attached) if you want to play on your own, post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; with pairings and kinks included. (You can post more if you are doing both BO and MIW kinktober - keep it to at most 5 files for each band you are participating in, no more than TEN(10) total.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to play!

After you’ve posted, people (any and all readers and writers!) can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write at least three NEW sentences as a reply to the ask.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post.

Friday 9 AM EST to Sunday 11:59EST

Have a question? my DMs are open, feel free to ask!

Please use appropriate warnings, tags, and 'read more' cuts in replies to asks

WHAT I'M WORKING ON

BAD OMENS

BRIDGE PART THREE (Omens! gang bang - leather fetish, boots)

You take his cock so well, doll You want another? (Ruffilo x Jolly x Noah x Reader - Sensory Deprivation, voice kink)

IMPOLITE PART FIVE (Noah x Jolly x oc - Service Submission, tasks, and assignments)

Puppy Play Date! (Pup!Noah x Pup!Folio x Owner!Ruffilo - collaring)

IF PAIN IS BEAUTY, I'M A PRETTY BITCH (Noah x FemDom OC Vivian - Chastity, Humiliation, Sissification//feminization)

MOTIONLESS IN WHITE

oh no, my boyfriend's a vampire (Chris x Nicky - vampire boyfriends/breath play)

Come on Chloe, It's just a haunted house (Stepbrother!Justin x Bio Brother’s Best Friend!Vinny x OC -boots/haunted house)

more cocks more fun right? (Chris x Justin x Rick x Ryan x vinny x oc - multiple penetration /voyeurism) 

You got that dawg in you? (Owner!Ryan x Pup!Vinny x oc - tasks and assignments - body worship)

She's going to drive them wild (Chris x Rick x reader - leather/latex -femdom)

A little gift for you👑-Impolite Part Five: Jolly x reader x noah

The doorbell rings and you check the camera feed on your phone when another text comes in.

Mr. Karlsson: It’s for you.

Propping up your phone against your empty coffee mug, you initiate a video call which Jolly answers instantly. Grinning, you open the package and find a sleek latex catsuit with matching ears. You giggle to yourself with excitement as you tear into the next box to find-

“You bought me two dildos?” You look over to your phone where Jolly is on screen. 

“Not just any old dildos,” Noah adds, coming to crowd behind Jolly. “They’re us… well, silicone.” He starts to chuckle, a cheeky grin spreading on his face.

 

ASK!

Writers and Readers are welcome to make requests for snippets of what you would like to see! You can ask for a moodboard too!

[the-oceankin-collective]

A SirenKin ask!

anon said: "i realized i was a sirenkin when i acted in something my friend wrote about them, and ive never felt more myself! any advice? anything helps, im new to the community and considered very basic and normal irl..."

(I apologise for the scuffed answering, I can't access the ask box lol)

ID: a text post divider with 5 blue waves varying in hue from light blue to dark blue. Several blue sparkles and emoticon shells line the bottom of the blue waves.

I'm SirenKin too and discovered my kin in a similar way! It feels weird to not just be a regular merfolk right?

But to feel more like yourself: when in the pool, do the dolphin stroke with your legs only! (Like move both your legs in unison to kick, feels like a tail)

Try and buy some fins! Like, flippers! You can get a good quality discreet (like divers gear) ones for about £20 if that's an accessible price for you

You can collect seashells and decorate yourself with seaweed (if comfortable)

Also!! Eat some more fish! If you can: a whole fish that you gotta actually eat around the bones for! Makes you feel like you caught it and like you're eating like you once did :)

Those are all the tips I've found, I hope they help you! :)

- 🧜‍♀️ Mod Pins

[sabotsen]

🍀 dont you DARE put more angst in hashtags. Roland IS gonna get reactions out of me because anons dont die. That's the plot armor you get for wearing cool sunglasses.

I think if he heats himself enough it will keep a hooman alive. Maybe grumpy but alive and uh-uh who was it logging in every day to gather cogs to pretty up his dorm. Huh. Who was it. Us. So either he works his bread or he will forever be sitting with a [bed] or [shelf] text balloon in an empty box. Zero mood, you hear me.

On a side note Sabo hun can you please stop stabbing us for ONE MINUTE- QAQ I just found new goofy funny blondie and you be spawning angst with him bro chill massacre is a lipstick not an instruction for a way of living

I've been so drained by work I actually fully forgot what I wrote and my inital reaction was, "I would never do that to you nonny. 🥺 What are you talking about" but no I did write something in those tags lol. 🫶

May your cool shades and plot armor keep you safe eternally bc if anything happens to you, that's it. The show is over and he is left alone on the bloodied stage. You can't leave him alone like that, dear. A pierrot is no good without his companion.

Hey hey hey! He gifts you things for those dorm accessories!! 🫵 sure there might be a playful bomb in a few of them but they are still gifts! (Real talk tho his dorm sleepy line about him so unused to how soft a bed can be cripples me every time.... 😭 my guy there are so many soft, gentle things in this world you don't gotta burn yourself out for someone else's dream...)

Also lmao I'm gonna frame that. "Massacre is a lipstick not an instruction for a way of life" 😔 i didnt post any angst for him yet tho!!!! I sent it all to rezy instead lol. uvhash is such a silly little guy i love him. Who else proudly gives you a glow in the dark jaw bone? I'm shoving him in a jar and shaking him like a maraca. I hope he comes home to you nonny, I hope he bursts into your dorm room covered in blood and gore with a giant grin on his face bc he wants to show you something RIGHT NOW 🤲

I promise I'll write something cute/soft for him after I get these two angst fics out of my system. I have to hurt us both first so the soft moments are all the more enjoyable

[creativekha0s]

Liv Morgan x Rhea Ripley/ Liv 4 Brutality one shot! Finally I wrote some smutty fun for these two after teasing it in other works. This was fun coming off the top of my head 😅 Please enjoy! Also this is my first time writing smut in almost two years so forgive me if it’s a little rusty lol

———————————————————————

11:57 PM.

Another year older and the day was coming to an end.

Lunch with the family, dinner with her friends, going out for a few drinks afterwards to celebrate. Everything was perfect. Another year in the books. Well, almost perfect. Not being able to give the answer you want to give someone when they ask what you want for your birthday felt criminal. But what Liv really wanted deep down was something no one could actually wrap up in a box and give her. It was like asking Santa around Christmas for superpowers or bottomless bank account. It was silly. To Liv though, it wasn’t.

11:58 PM.

Not a phone call, not one text, a mention on social media, a Snapchat even. Hell, even a handwritten letter would make her fold with a drop of emotion. But nothing. Maybe it was silly after all to be this hopeful for something she ached for so bad. Maybe calling it an early night tonight wasn’t the right call and staying out drinking, not to celebrate her birthday, but to numb the pain she felt would make things easier. Maybe, just maybe, it was time to face reality and move on with her life. Others have done it to her countless times before and maybe it was time to play their game.

11:59 PM.

A loud knock on her apartment door sends a wave of panic throughout her chest. Not even three seconds pass before a series of quick knocks follow. Liv rushes over to fumble with the locks and turns the handle, and another wave of panic hits her when she opens the door.

Tall. Tattooed. Raven dark hair. Puppy dog eyes. Australian accent. A smile that could warm up the Earth in a blizzard. In her raised hands was a one chocolate cupcake with a single lit candle.

In other words, a birthday wish granted.

“Happy birthday, Livvy.” Her voice soft and gentle but three words spoken hit Liv Morgan right in her heart. The blonde’s eyes lit up and her lips curled into a sad smile. She wasn’t forgotten about after all. “You wouldn’t believe the day I’ve had trying to get all the way here to wish you this face to face. You can’t deny it isn’t spontaneous.” Rhea offered the cupcake with her hands. “But quick, make a wish. We’re almost out of time.”

Thirty seconds to midnight according to Liv’s watch. The blonde was at a loss for words currently. She only had one wish loaded in the chamber as of five minutes ago and it was granted thirty seconds ago. Thinking quickly, Liv took a step forward and slowly blew the single candle out and watched as the smoke drifted into the air. Rhea brought the cupcake back down and pulled the candle out, putting the butt end between her lips to lick the remnants off with a satisfying hum.

“I wasn’t sure if I’d see you or not….” Liv spoke softly as her eyes watched Rhea’s lips wrap around the candle.

“Oh darling, missing your birthday is something I never want to happen in this life.”

She was perfect. This….Liv could barely put it into words. It was all romantic in such a way only Rhea could make her feel. Making her wait all day, hanging onto that thread of hope, that there was a chance they would see each other today, until literally the last possible second….

The next thing they knew was Liv had pulled Rhea inside her apartment and crashed their lips together. Somehow in the midst of being pulled inside, the apartment door getting locked behind them, and being led towards Liv’s bedroom, Rhea was able to safely place the cupcake down on a side table for an after dessert dessert. When the cupcake was safe, Rhea hoisted Liv up so the blonde could wrap her legs around her body and carried the blonde safely to her bed, their lips gliding against each other’s while their tongues danced excitedly together.

“I’ve missed you terribly.” Liv gasped out in between kisses. Reaching down she began pulling Rhea’s top off of her body and over her head. In response, the Aussie leaned down and started to attack Liv’s neck with strong, wet kisses. “Please don’t ever leave me again.” Liv let out a soft exhale turning her head to the side for easier access, then a moan escaped her lips when Rhea latched onto a particular spot.

“Never again.” Rhea promised. This was it this time and neither were going to let any obstacles come between them. The heart wants what it wants, Liv and Rhea knew in theirs that they wanted each other. As her hands dipped up into Liv’s shirt, she quickly discarded it to the side of the bed, smirking when saw that it was the only article of clothing she wore, and targeted her kisses down Liv’s neck, to her chest, before capturing a nipple between her lips. Though it was well past midnight, Rhea was going to make damn sure that Liv enjoyed every second of her birthday gift. Liv was instantly in heaven having Rhea twirling her tongue around her nipples, sucking them gently, pulling one up with her lips while her fingers tugged the opposite one.

The blonde’s hands pawed at Rhea’s ass not once but twice, then she skillfully undid her bra and pulled the dark haired girl up to return the favor, sucking and teasing her breasts with a burning passion. The bedroom suddenly filled with gasps, hums, and low moans while the two battled for dominance over one another. Liv’s night shorts were on the floor, Rhea’s jeans had been pushed down past her ankles, their tongues aggressively fighting for supremacy.

Ultimately, Rhea gained control. Her hand pulled the front of Liv’s underwear to the side and began feeling just how much of a wet mess she made the blonde underneath her. When Liv whimpered, she knew that she had won. Teasing her fingers up and down, pushing along her glistening folds, each moan from Liv was music to Rhea’s ears.

“Fuck, baby…please don’t stop..” Liv groaned out.

“Mmm. Tell me what you want, birthday girl.” Rhea smirked and pushed her index finger slowly inside the blonde then back out, bringing it up to her lips to taste.

“You.” Liv shivered with another moan, gazing down at the raven haired woman between her legs. “I want you, Rhea….take me, mark me, fuck me….” Without keeping her any further from her wish, Rhea hovered her lips above Liv’s and pushed two fingers inside of her, grinning from ear to ear as the air from Liv’s gasp hit her in the face.

“You’re so fucking gorgeous, Livvy.” Their eyes remained locked on each other while Rhea began pumping in and out of Liv at a steady rhythm, watching how she moaned and attempted to buck her hips to match her pace. With her free hand Rhea traced her nails up Liv’s thighs, up her abdomen, slow up across her chest, and wrapping her hand gently around her throat before she cupped Liv’s cheek. “I’m going to appreciate every single inch of your body.” Her two fingers sped up fingerfucking Liv until she could feel when she was close, that’s when the Aussie dipped her head down to finish Liv off personally with her tongue, swiping it across her clit over and over again until Liv Morgan was an incoherent mess.

“Oh my. Fucking. Fuuuuuuck.” Rhea smirked at her actions that caused the blonde girl to quiver, watching her legs shake in pleasure as her tongue expertly helped Liv ride her orgasm as long as possible. Liv gripped the sheets on her bed and bucked her hips against Rhea’s tongue over and over until she was forced come back down from her high, laying back flat on her bed with the biggest smile on her face. Once Rhea lapped out everything she had to offer, the dark hair girl crawled up Liv’s body as peppered kisses everywhere until she reached her lips, the two getting lost in each other’s eyes. “You’re incredible, so frickin’ incredible.” Tasting herself against Rhea’s lips as they kissed turned Liv on even more, so she flipped the two over and straddled the Aussie, pulling her underwear down in the process while the girl on bottom giggled.

“Livvy, I don’t want your homemade cupcake to go stale.” Rhea heard something along the lines of only needing a few minutes herself, Liv’s words becoming muffler as her head dove in between Rhea’s legs this time. Rhea gasped more audibly than expected and looked down to watch Liv hungrily provide her the same passionate lip service, running a free hand through her blonde hair to pull her face impossibly closer. “Mmm, fuck yes baby. Don’t stop, don’t you dare bloody stop…” It wasn’t Rhea’s birthday but it didn’t stop Liv from granting her wish and continuing her oral assault until she made Rhea’s legs quiver just the same as hers did, smiling as she savored every single second of Rhea’s orgasm on the tip of her tongue.

Liv pressed a few more kisses up Rhea’s body and joined her in her embrace and rested her head gently on her chest, both panting quietly against one another. When she felt she had her leg strength back the blonde wandered over to the where the cupcake sat and grabbed in her hand and brought it back to bed with her. Rhea had climbed back to the pillows and rested her head as her eyes went from seeing stars to seeing a happy and very naked Liv Morgan peel the wrapper off of the cupcake.

“Some wishes do come true, don’t they?” Liv took a bite of the cupcake and shut her eyes happily to enjoy the flavor of a homemade cupcake. Ripping off a piece she fed it to Rhea, who used her tongue teasingly to wipe the excess frosting on the side of her lip. “This is amazing, thank you so much for everything, Rhea.”

“Everyone deserves to have an amazing birthday dessert after they’ve had their dessert.”

The two chuckled and finished off the treat together, entangling with one another as they shared sweet kisses with each other, doing their best to entice the other to cave first so they could go another round before their night was over.

[jichanxo]

senseific update ⭐

am gonna talk about senseific and my writing goal last month, so this is a long post ↓

my goal last month was to add 5,000-10,000 words to my senseific wip, and at 12:05am on the first day of the next month, i made it to 10,000 words 😭🙏 so stoked!! i made some serious tangible progress. for once. lol

it's currently at 45k words. i'm not sure exactly how much i added, since i deleted some of my placeholder writing and that cut into the word count as i worked, so realistically i added a bit more than 10,000, though i have no idea how much. either way, i made it!

i got a first pass done of all the dance club stuff, which is... the writing equivalent of me Eating My Veggies. it's not always the most fun (especially covering things that happened in canon) but it's necessary. feels like i've been stuck there forever, and now i can move onto other things... until of course i have to proofread it, but shhh...

robotics and boxing are next, i think. still very lost when i think about the biker stuff 😭 i did end up mentioning the skateboarding in passing, but i don't think i'll do much with that since the plot is so short. (i guess shikishima will turn up at the finale anyway?)

anyhow that still means there's a whole lot to do, and i need to keep doing my notetaking on the clubs 😔 back to the mines...

since i added so many words to chapter 3 (since i finally filled out the conclusion to the dance club plot) i had to change where i split chapters 3/4!

currently things look like this:

chapter 1: 7,011 words (this one needs minor adjustments when i sort out my shit with robotics club)

chapter 2: 6,895 words (i have a spot marked to add a robotics club scene)

chapter 3: 9,990 words (The Dance Club Conclusion. so she's fucking Big. after i take a break i'll need to give it a second pass)

just from looking at the word counts of these chapters you can see why getting 10,000 words done was a big deal for me... got a big chunk done...

chapter 4 got a new title and i shoved a few of the end scenes of chp3 at the start of this one instead. after that is an unfinished boxing scene, then some kitakata related plot to look at, so those are probably the next things i'll aim to get done.

chapter 4's currently called "talk too much", since the scene of kitakata saying something stupid to yagami got moved here instead of chapter 3. and also uh. gossip gets brought up. usually i need to think a lot for titles but this immediately felt right for once.

speaking of titles though, right now i'm unsure about senseific's title. again. but i have no alternative so i'll just have to keep thinking about it. maybe i need to ask around for opinions... it's not an urgent issue so maybe i'll stop worrying so much.

anyway it was kinda funny writing kitakata and yagami sorta getting along with the full knowledge that kitakata is going to ruin it all in an already written later scene 💀 don't give kitakata too much credit yagami, he's going to make you regret it later lmao

anyway i think that's everything. i wrote this text wall at 1am (though i will post it at a normal time)

[theminecraftbee]

6, 4, 13 :)

4. How many WIPs do you have right now?

a sensible two, actually! (that i am like, actively likely to work on.) you could MAYBE bump that number to three? but like, one that is actually active, one that i know i'll finish at one point, and one that i've promised but gotten next to nothing done on, so i'm reluctant to count it as active.

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

yeah but my ability to tell you the names is questionable i'm real bad at remembering like, the names of fics. if you're looking for recs i can gesture at "the sky weighs heavy tonight" or "77-2"? little too tired to go real hunting right now.

13. How much planning do you do before writing?

it depends! current wip has a barebones outline, which i needed to stay on pacing since it's long. most fics have like, a few specific scenes that i know i want to hit ahead of time. a LOT of the time though those scenes only exist in my head and i just sorta Start Writing, rather than doing heavy planning. if it's one of my tumblr drabbles i normally just had a single idea and wrote it, stream-of-consciousness, into the tumblr text box, lol

[mari--lace]

1, 3, 5, 7, 10, 13 (👀) e 19 per l’ask game <3

1. What is your favorite trope to write? I don't really know bc I rarely reason in tropes! Might be found family 💜 I'm not sure I've written it a lot, but I love it

3. What is the main program you use for writing (google docs, the ao3 writing text box, etc.)? I'm a basic Word girl!

5. The fic you’re most proud of writing? This is a hard question ç.ç Right now I'd say "Filling the voids" (Riempire i vuoti), I'm still not sure it makes sense for anyone that's not me, but I've wanted to write it for a loong time and I'm happy with it! (Also like every fic I've written with aspec rep!)

7. Favorite ship to write? Right now it's Matt/Nat! It changes with my obsessions 🫶

10. Best/funniest comment you’ve ever gotten on a fic? Okay but how can I pick? There's a few comments that come to mind. I'll mention one on the first fic I ever wrote about asexuality (Significa me/It means me) saying "if I were a teacher I'd read this in class", I was really touched. 🥹 Funniest comments, those ranting under my fics are pretty fun and always greatly appreciated!

13. Latest fic written/latest WIP? Okay, full disclosure: my latest wip is a crack fic I "have to" write because I lost a bet XD. It involves Matt exploring the magical world of Daredevil fanfictions, lol. That's my only current wip, I've got another idea but I didn't start writing it down yet. Latest written fic is a style exercise: one flashfic about Matt in first person pov, one flashfic about Elektra in second person pov, one about them both in third person pov. It was a fun experiment!

19. Have you ever created an OC for a fic? It says "fic", so I'm not going to count my original works. I created minor OCs when needed, but I don't think I ever built a complete character for a fic. I have explored characters who are names or little more in canon and built on them, but that's not really the same thing.

Thanks for asking <3

[boybandbaby]

Grown Ups Grow Apart

Pairing: Bestfriend!Eddie x reader, Eddie x Steve, Eddie x Reader (It's a mess all over honestly.)

Summary: Eddie and you are best friends but things become complicated over time.

Word Count: 4K+

Notes: I was high when I thought of this but sober when I wrote it. All mistakes and confusion are mine lol. I just kept writing whatever my mind came up with so this might be super confusing. I might make a part 2 or series if there's a demand for it. This is a modern au. THIS WAS INSPIRED BY THIS SONG

Warnings: cuss words, mean words between Eddie and you/ reader, if there's anything I missed please let me know.

I saw your picture in a box last night

Seems I'm always unpacking, yeah, I moved again

Did I tell you that?

It got me thinking

I've been missing you, thought of calling you

Yeah I wanted to

But I got anxious 'cause that's what adults do

And they start looking back

Don't you hate that

You were currently packing up your room, moving back to Hawkins by the end of the week. You had grown up there most of your life and had to move right after your senior year of high school. Now you were in your mid 20’s, headed back for a new job.

As you packed you decided to throw out things you didn’t want or need. This meant you had to go through every area and item you owned. As you reached down under your bed, you pulled the box you had shoved there the day you moved in about 5 years ago. The metal lunchbox covered in stickers of well known bands and local bands that you had seen with Eddie. Eddie. Your best friend or ex best friend from Hawkins. You hadn’t seen or spoken to him since the night before you left.

The Polaroid was the last picture of you and Eddie together. You were in your cap and gown, arm around Eddie’s shoulders as you both smiled at the camera. Unfortunately, Eddie was held back so he didn’t graduate with you. You never judged him for it knowing all his childhood trauma and struggles. You wondered what he was up to. Was he still in a band? Did he still love d&d? That you assumed was still true. Was he single? How was Wayne? Did Eddie graduate? Did he finally move out of Hawkins like you both always planned? You selfishly hoped he was still in Hawkins and that you could see him. Hear his voice again.

You wanted to hear his voice everyday that you were away. You wanted to call him, apologize for the things you said and the way you left. Left him alone in a shitty town with shitty people who judged him. Made him feel like a freak and an outcast. The same way you treated him when you left.

Now you're weighing on my thoughts tonight

Can you explain this

How can you know everything and nothing about my life

At the same time

Time is crazy, I don't know where all my life has gone

I told you secrets, did you keep them, do you miss home

When you start looking back

To those basements and backyard dances

Our song, the front seat of my jeep

In love and taking chances

The night you looked at me and said

Time won't fly, I won't let it

Promise you won't forget it

The way that it is, the way that we are

'Cause kids grow up and grown ups grow apart

Grown ups grow apart, ah

Eddie knew everything about your life from social media and a mutual friend, Gareth. You and Gareth occasionally texted, never really being close but being friends when he met Eddie. Eddie knew what your job was and what you currently looked like and where you lived and sometimes hung out. What he didn’t know was the personal things like your daily routine, current obsessions, or even your favorite color.

He knows your deepest and darkest secrets, well your old secrets. He’s sure you have new ones and he’s almost certain you share those with someone else now (you don’t). The idea that you have a new best friend, someone you dance with, sing with, laugh with, cuddle with, hurts his heart. Those were things you were allowed to do with others but only saved for him. He was the only person who saw you freely be yourself. You’d sing with your chest and dance like no one was watching (Eddie was ALWAYS watching), laugh from your belly even if it meant snorting or wheezing out loud and snuggle up tight with him.

He remembered the last time you cuddled together. During the summer right after graduation. It was hot and humid but you both still snuggled up together. An old, raggedy blanket thrown on the patches of dirt and grass in Wayne’s backyard. It was the night you told him you were moving. Two weeks, he remembers. You were leaving in two weeks. He only had you for two more weeks. You both promised to always be best friends. Promised each other to text and call and write to each other and even visit when you could. None of that happened. Promises were broken and time flew. 5 years had flown by without a single moment of contact.

Do you remember summer '09

On my birthday

After dinner, you introduced me to the guy you liked

Now in hindsight

You're so beautiful, I was insecure and I won't lie

It was my birthday and I wanted him and I hate

That I could hurt your feelings like that, yeah

And I can't take it back

It was your 18th birthday. You and Eddie had made plans to go to dinner, somewhere outside of Hawkins to make a big deal out of it. It was the year you were officially becoming an adult after all and Eddie was proud of everything you accomplished this year even if you felt like you accomplished nothing. After, you would go to the store and scan the shelves and racks for things you would never buy with an ice cream or shake in your hand. Tonight was different. Eddie had said he had plans afterwards with a guy he liked. You knew Eddie was bisexual, he had told you he was unsure of his sexuality in middle school. He fully embraced it (between the two of you) during high school. You were the only person that knew.

So when you both stepped out of the restaurant after sharing a family size bowl of pasta, you were shocked to see Steve Harrington leaning against his car, arms crossed, waiting for Eddie. You had driven you both to the restaurant in your beat up Jeep, telling Eddie he had to finally let you drive and pick the music. He agreed as part of your birthday gift (the other part of your gift being Eddie’s presence and him paying for dinner).

“Y/n, you know Steve right?” Eddie smiled, awkwardly hugging Steve.

“Yeah, yeah I do.” You replied, looking at your shoes as you stuck your hand out. Of course you knew Steve. Who didn’t? You had found him cute since freshman year. You never told Eddie because you thought he would’ve made fun of you having a crush on a jock.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Steve smiled. God, he was handsome. The way his hair fell slightly against his forehead, his jeans hugging his thighs, his arms straining against his t-shirt. You wanted him. You wanted to steal him from Eddie. You didn’t want Eddie to have him. You were a horrible friend.

You began to get jealous when Eddie would hang out with you less during senior year. You began to get jealous when he gained more friends. People he and Steve had in common and who played d&d with him. You would shut him out when he did try to hang out or meet up. The loneliness made senior year emotionally more stressful but allowed you to focus on your plans for after. During the summer you spent a little more time with Eddie knowing you couldn’t use school as an excuse anymore. Then came the news that you were moving. You knew he’d be okay without you. He had more than enough friends to fill your absence.

The two weeks between you dropping the bomb that you were moving was filled with amazing moments between you and Eddie. You had began to cry as you laid on his chest but Eddie told you to stop. You still had two weeks he said. So you wiped your tears and made the best of the time together. Then, the night of your fight and end of your friendship.

You both were sitting in his van, hotboxing and listening to your shared playlist. A mix of both his and your favorite tunes. “I can’t believe you’re really leaving.” He sighed as smoke left his mouth. He took another hit before passing it to you.

“But we’ll still be friends right?” You smile softly, “and when you graduate you’ll come live with me somewhere far away and we’ll make a life for ourselves.”

“Right.” He snorted.

“What do you mean?” You passed the joint back to him.

“You think I’m getting out of here? I already flunked school once, it’s just going to get worse from here.” He brushed some ash off of his jeans.

“So what? It was a one time thing. You’ll graduate in another year and can be on your way.” You stopped his hand, noticing there wasn’t anymore ash to brush off.

“You’ve always been naive y/n.” He pushes your hand off his thigh. “I’m not smart like you. I don’t have a plethora of opportunities like you.”

“What are you even talking about? You’re literally so smart.” You pull your hand into your lap. “Remember when you scored higher than me on that history test? You didn’t even study, you just knew the concepts and stuff.”

“I guessed on most of the test y/n. Mrs. Borris thought I cheated remember? Even called Wayne and had us in the principals office.” He rested his head back against the window of the van, the velvet curtain giving him a small sort of pillow.

“You’re still smart in other aspects Eddie.” You shrug.

“I hate when you do that.” He groans and closes his eyes.

“Do what?” You glare at him. “Sit here?”

“You make me feel like shit when you invalidate my feelings.” He finally takes another puff and doesn’t bother passing it to you. “I’m telling you how I feel and you’re trying to tell me the opposite.”

“I’m not trying to make you feel like shit. I just think you’re hard on yourself when you shouldn’t be. You’re seriously one of the best people I know. You are smart Eddie. And really strong and such a hard worker. I just don’t understand why you have to put yourself down.”

“It’s because that’s how I feel. You’re leaving and you’re going to do amazing things. I’m here y/n. I’ll never leave this place.” You can hear the way his throat closes slightly, he’s choking on a sob.

“I’ll always be here for you Eddie.” You scoot closer to him. “And you have Steve and Dustin and Robin while I’m away. They’re cool people.”

“It’ll be easier for me when you leave. I don’t have to compare myself to you and wonder why you’re friends with me.” He says. That’s when you snap.

“Damn it Eddie! You’re making me feel like shit now! Why can’t you just accept that I love you for who you are and I love being your friend.” You groan, slipping your shoes back on. “It’s like I have to justify all my actions with you.” You crawl over to the metal door and open it, slipping out and onto the pavement. You turn back and he’s already exiting the van with you. “I’m glad I’m leaving too. I won’t have to hear your shit anymore.”

“I’ll fucking help you pack if it means you get out of here faster.” He throws the joint on the ground and stomps on it unnecessarily hard.

“No need. I don’t want your nasty ass hands touching any of my stuff.” You growl. It was the only insult you could think of. “Wouldn’t want you anywhere near my stuff, you’d probably curse it with your Satanism.” Now you are grasping for straws. Anything that would hurt him as much as he’s hurting you.

“Oh so now I’m a freak? Just like everyone’s been saying?” He slams the back door not before grabbing your bag. “You’re pathetic using that as an insult y/n.” He tosses your bag at your feet. Good thing you didn’t have anything valuable in it other than your wallet and some gum.

“I’m pathetic? You’re the one who’s a legal adult and still in high school.” You pick up your bag. When Eddie doesn’t reply, you look up. His eyes are watery and his cheeks are pink with embarrassment. You’d always told him he wasn’t stupid or weird and told him not to feel bad about being held back. Now you were spewing every insecurity at him.

With a shaky voice he replies, “well you know what? I’m sorry that I’m your only friend. When you realize you’re lonely in a new town and have no one to talk to or hangout with, I hope you think back to this moment and how you ruined our friendship. I’ll be here with all my amazing friends who support me and think highly of me and you’ll be wishing you could call me. Lose my number when you leave.” He shakes his head and heads to the driver seat of his car.

“Oh yeah? Well, let’s see how many of those friends stay when they realize you’ll be holding them back. Just like you held me back all these years.” You shout and start making your way back to your car. Eddie hears it but doesn’t respond. He doesn’t leave when you do. Just sits in his car and sobs, thinking over everything that just went down.

-

Then the next morning, he second guesses himself. Everything he said and did. Was the entire thing his fault? Was what you said all true? He knows he has to go see you before you leave and hopefully talk to you. Maybe the weed fucked up both of your brains and just made you both say things you didn’t mean. Of course, Eddie wanted you to stay, he didn’t know how he’d survive without you. Yes, he loved his new friends and he wasn’t technically with Steve. Sure they’d went on a few dates but it really didn’t turn into anything more than that. No one knew him like you. As he quickly got dressed into something that didn’t smell like sleep sweat and weed smoke, he rushed to brush his teeth, wash his face and tame his hair. He then said bye to Wayne and rushed over to your house. He didn’t know what time you were leaving or even if you were still there. He hoped the latter wasn’t true.

Just his luck. The house looked abandoned and there were no moving trucks or your dented, ugly colored Jeep. Tears started to trickle down his cheeks as he parked the car. Maybe just maybe you were still here. He knocked on the front door as loud as he possibly could. After several minutes, he knew he was shit out of luck. You were gone. You hadn’t even said goodbye like you promised two weeks ago.

-

You made the drive back to Hawkins, still in the same old Jeep you had before. You tried to make it look better but it still remained an ugly light silver, several scratches and bumps on the doors. The only new addition was a cracked window on the right back passenger window.

You’d found a decently priced apartment. A one bedroom with a bathroom that had everything you needed, a very small kitchen and enough space for at least a couch. It was livable and you knew you could make it home with a few touches of color and decorations. The apartment complex was along a busy street across from shopping center. There was a grocery store, a pho spot, an insurance company, a liquor store and a cash checking store. It wasn’t much of a view from your apartment but it wasn’t bad. You parked along the curb and grabbed a small box to take up with you to start the move in process.

Eddie was with Steve, Robin, Dustin, and Lucas scanning the grocery aisles for snacks for their planned movie night. His car was at the shop, needing a new battery and front brakes. He would be able to work on it between cars at work. Today was his day off though and Steve picked him up since his car wasn’t working which means he’s crammed in the backseat with Dustin and Lucas. Robin and Steve are inseparable and have to be in the front together. I mean Eddie and Steve have kissed, cuddled and fucked over the years but he’s still shoved into the back seat when it comes to Robin.

Once the gang had picked out everything off of the list, they strolled back to the car. Steve pushed the cart and Dustin hung off the side, making it harder to push. Robin and Eddie were tossing fruit snacks into Lucas’ mouth as they walked, occasionally throwing one at Steve’s head and hoping it gets stuck in his hair.

Before Eddie can throw another one, he spots your Jeep. He knows it’s yours. The same color and dents from 5 years ago. There’s a partially ripped sticker on your gas tank lid. You’d tried to take it off even with the help of rain but it wouldn’t budge. Eddie branded your car with a homemade corroded coffin sticker when he first designed the logo. Eddies slightly hurt that you tried to take it off but he’s not surprised since you’d unfollowed him on social media and refused to answer any calls or texts that he made the first month you moved away.

Before he can say anything to anyone, his feet carry him across the parking lot and towards your car. He has to dodge the traffic, curse words and car horns screaming at him along the way. You’re not in the car when he arrives. He’s pressed against the cracked window, taking in the boxes as he steps on the sidewalk.

“Get away from my car!” You rush over towards him, not thinking of how dangerous this could be for you.

He backs away and turns toward you. How you didn’t notice the long hair and leather jacket is beyond you. There’s a pause, a long pause, and then he’s breaking into a smile. The prettiest smile you’ve ever seen. He knew it was you. He’s strutting towards you before you can flee the scene. His arms wrap around your waist and he’s lifting you up into his chest, your toes barely holding you up on the sidewalk. He breathes you in, the scent of your hair (something similar to an aromatherapy essential oil rather than the fruity scents you went for in high school). He wonders what else about you had changed, did you still like your favorite ice cream flavor? Did you still have the same favorite pizza toppings?

“Hi.” You squeak out, not minding how he’s squishing you.

“Hi.” He sighs. 5 long years without this. No one’s hug’s compared to yours. Steve’s we’re strong and shy, quick to separate due to lack of touch throughout his life. Chrissy’s we’re short and sweet. Amanda’s (a random hookup from the bar) we’re tight and clingy, mixed in with a few kisses on the jaw. Anyone he had hugged had not meant as much to him as you therefore their hugs didn’t compare. “You’re moving back?”

“Yeah.” You smile, arms clinging around his shoulders. “I’m back.”

As much as he doesn’t want to let you go, he pulls back, his hands on your waist. He takes in your clothes, your hair style, your demeanor. It’s much more shy than he was used to. Are you shy now? Is that who you were? Or was it that he was now a stranger?

“I can’t believe you’re here.” He states, almost amazed that this is real. You’re really here. “You missed me huh?” He jokes, tries to lighten the tension.

“I did.” You say honestly. “Everyday that I was away.” You take a step back, his hands falling from your hips and searching for you again. “Eddi-“

“Don’t. Please.” He begs. “I-“

“I’m sorry.” You cut him off, same as he did to you. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“No, no.” He shakes his head. “I’m sorry. I was such a sick. You didn’t deserve that and I ruined everything.”

“You ruined everything? Eddie it was all me. All me. It’s my fault we fell apart and I’m sorry.” Your voice wobbles with tears in your eyes. “I was a different person back then. I depended on you too much. I was jealous of you.”

“What? Jealous of me? How could you be? You’re this amazing person and I was a nobody.” He cups your cheeks, brushing away tears.

“You were everything to me. So free and fearless. So incredibly cute and funny and so many people loved you and wanted to be in your presence. You were everything I wanted to be.”

“You’re crazy! I wasn’t any of those things without you.” He kisses your forehead. “You are my best friend and I love you. I still do. After all this time, you’re still the person I want by my side through everything.” He smiles and runs his thumbs across your wet cheeks.

“I was so in love with you Eddie. A part of me still loves you. I’m so sorry.” You lean into his hand. “But you got with Steve and I was mad and it kept building when I would see you together. Then I thought he was hot and I wanted to fuck him and hurt you because I was hurt. I became this person who was capable of hurting my best friend and it wasn’t the person you needed in your life. Then I moved and I thought it would be what was best for you. I had no control over the move but I also didn’t fight it, ya know?” You rambled.

“There’s so much to unpack there and I don’t know where to start.” He laughs through his tears. Your hands rest in his wrists as he holds you close. “I’ve loved you. I always have. But you never seemed interested and I was exploring my sexuality. You’re right, Steve’s hot and all but we were both in a place where we just needed to experience things. We’re good friends now but that’s all.”

“I still hate you for that though.” You joke. “I know things are different now. I know we’re strangers but I need you back in my life Eddie. Whether that’s as a friend or lover or whatever. I just need you some way with me.”

“I need you too. I’ve always needed you. I’m not saying that to guilt trip you or make you feel bad, I just need you to know that I’m sorry and I love you.” He rests his forehead on yours.

“I’m willing to try to mend our friendship if you are. No bullshit or games.” You kiss his cheek.

“I’m not letting you leave me again.” He closes his eyes, “it hurt too much the first time. No one could fill that void.”

“I’ll forever apologize and try to make it up to you. You deserve love and happiness and all the good things in life.” You kiss his right palm.

“The only thing I want or ever need is standing right in front of me.” He smiles. He doesn’t kiss your lips as much as you both want him too. Instead he plants a kiss to your nose, slipping his hands down, yours follow with him. He laces his right hand with your left. “So? What next?”

“You can help me move in? And maybe stay the night?” You asks shyly.

“You sure? I mean, I may be trying to trick you and get payback for everything you did. I might try to curse every part of your place with my Satanism.” He shrugs and opens the trunk.

“Oh my god! Shut up! I’m sorry I said that okay!” You push his shoulder, laughing as he hands you a box. You’re both joking and laughing as if everything is the same it was years ago.

From across the street, Steve looks over at Eddie and meets Robin’s eyes. She had been watching him ever since Eddie left their group. He shakes his head as she gives him a sympathetic look. She says I’m sorry with her eyes. Steve says nothing as he gets back into the car and drives away without Eddie.