#anyway! if something is messed up just tell me i copied and pasted a lot of stuff

[captain-marble]

silly thought that i’ve been rotating at might write someday (although knowing me…)

anyways!

someone gets mad and pranks the justice league by releasing clips of their embarrassing moments on tower (nothing that could reveal identities but still embarrassing)

it’s stuff like marvel failing at cooking

batman being sleep deprived and trying to parent different league members (namely marvel)

flash running into walls and things (a lot)

superman being afraid of a shoe and litterally leaping into the air to get away from it. (it was green)

anyways everyone find this hillarious and the members are a lil mortified. But fawcett takes it into their own hands to give marvel food (litterally he has too much food to know what to do with) to the point he ends up like going around sharing it with the homeless kids and stuff

not only that but the league decide to take it into their own hands to teach marvel. cut to videos being released of marvel learning to cook with different leaguers

superman: marv can you pass me a rolling pin? so what you’ve got to do is-

marvel looking at a pot of utensils questioning…. before tentatively holding out a masher: ?

superman: (blinks)

supes probably teaches him how to make apple pie and talk about how if you don’t use the sugar you can use the pie crust to make savoury pies too and blah blah life hack. his parents probably mean he’s the worst offender for trying to shove food or recipes onto marvel

hal and barry prolly teach him how to make like single guy with a shitty job type grind shit that’s like carb loaded and you can just bulk make and store ands got everything you need (cuz they always busy as hell and ain’t rich or anything so don’t got the time or stuff to make tons of food) (it kinda looks like struggle food but yk it gets them through)

hal: so yeah you just dump everything in and if it starts to look radioactive then you know it’s cooked-

billy ‘orphan street rat will eat anything’ batson: damn bitch you live like this? /silly

diana teaches him a greek dish from her childhood that she thinks marvel would feel nostalgic for (i mean billy doesn’t but he remembers eating it in past lives and the thought diana put into it really comforts him)

bruce either a) refuses to teach marvel anything as he himself cannot cook and won’t let the work know that (as all of these cooking videos have been being leaked to the internet who are EATING IT UP like it’s not just fawcett anymore everyone loves cap now becuase you can tell he’s just that authentic cuz his ass does not know these are being filmed) b) cannot cook so it ends up just being a hot mess c) they learn to make a new recipe together d) he has alfred teach him how to make something so he doesn’t embarrass himself e) he teaches marvel how to make struggle food that’s worse than hal and barry’s

marvel: aren’t you funded by a billionaire?

batman: hm

marvel: batman….damn bitch you live like this???????????

everyone just dogs on batman online for like banging bruce wayne (no one believes that the butts match :/ ) and yet still being ass at cooking, like bro is at nuclear levels of damn you live like this with his struggle food

anyways cap finds out about the cooking with cap vids and immediately gets all embarrassed that people know he sucks at cooking, fawcett lay off a little on giving him food now they know that the JL are helping him, but he regularly receives copies of old cook books and someone’s nans favourite recipe and stuff and he’s taking home enough food from the JL to actually eat well and is therefore a lot happier and so the JL are like wow marv really likes cooking, and so at least like once a week (usually more) someone (or sometimes just he will) will cook with him and he’ll take home the left overs (if people eat any otherwise he just takes it all himself (despite him frantically offering the food out to people cuz he feels bad for taking so much))

years later when the identity reveal happens they’re like wow??? this makes so much sense???? i’m so glad we’ve been inadvertently feeding the homeless child??? yippee for him not starving and being more healthy that he would’ve been????

but yeah it’s so silly and i think billy would actually love having the chance to eat foods he’s never had before, especially where he spent so long on the streets that he kinda was forced to like ration and buy cheap food, so like he’s being treated by trying new foods and risking not liking it and stuff

but yeah i just think cap cooking and baking is neat teehee

[the-doomed-witch]

21 with wanda x reader with wanda being insecure about her body after having the twins and is insecure about her stretch marks and all that but reader reassures she’s perfect and kisses them

✦ When You’re With Me, No Judgement

Wanda Maximoff x GenderNeutral!Reader

Prompt:

21. Having your lover list everything they’re insecure about, and responding with gentle caresses, kisses, and compliments about those areas

Warnings: 18+ MDNI (general), fluff, bodily insecurities (specifically post-pregnancy), not proofread

Author’s Note: hello anon, sorry that your request took quite a while, i have been having some stuff going on so yeah :( but this request made me so happy, thank you very much! i hope i did your request justice <3 (let’s just say this is an AU where agatha doesn’t mess w the twins🥲)

Masterlist

YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED TO REPOST OR COPY MY WORK.

— ✦ —

“Wanda! What a pleasure! Your sons look perfectly healthy for an outing today. Why don’t you take them out to the beach?”

Wanda's face gets tense. “No Agatha, I think they’re just fine at home. Besides, they might even eat up the sand. It isn’t safe.”

“You haven’t even stepped out since you gave birth to them. Are you sure you don’t need a nice day out? You could go out with Y/N, and I can take care of Tommy and Billy.”

“Thank you, but it’s really fine by me. I’m too exhausted anyways. I would rather prefer having some sleep.”

“At your service madam. I’m gonna take care of the babies today, you can have a day to rest all by yourself” Agatha concluded the conversation, not allowing Wanda to deny her.

You heard the entire conversation and felt quite unsure about Wanda’s new obsession with staying home at all costs. For the first few months, you thought they were just hormones, but it was starting to get concerning. Besides, Wanda and you had your special memories related to the beach.

Once Wanda packed all the important stuff for Billy and Tommy, and sent off Agatha for the afternoon, you grab her by the waist. “Hey, sweetheart.”

“I’m sorry detka I don’t feel quite… well right now. My head is really fuzzy. I’m really sorry Y/N.” And she walks away. You immediately sense something has been on her mind since the past few weeks.

You find her upstairs, in the bedroom. She was laying on the bed, tilted to the other side, clutching her body close. You go and lay down next to her, hugging her from behind. “Penny for your thoughts, my love?”

“I don’t feel like talking right now Y/N.”

“Tell me what’s wrong Wanda. I’m sure we can work it out, it’ll get better!”

“No Y/N. I tried everything, but nothing has been effective or helpful in the slightest.” She turns towards you, burying her head in your embrace. “It’s okay, baby. You can talk to me, you know you can.” you rub her back to give her some comfort.

“I can’t- Y/N, giving birth to the boys has given me stretch marks. Lots of them. All over my body. Stomach, thighs, arms. I just cannot wear anything that shows my body even a little bit. I’ve been so insecure!”

“Oh baby, it’s okay. Stretch marks are normal. Don’t let their standards define you. I don’t want to force you to feel beautiful all the time. But feel like you are yourself. These marks - they prove how loving of a mother you are, how you carried the babies for months, took care of them.”

“You’re right, I know that you are. But I cannot stop feeling so left out. My body has bloated and I feel so uncomfortable about it.” She breaks a sob and it makes you want to cry. You stop yourself from doing so, because you feel the need to help Wanda feel better first.

“Take off your shirt, will you, love? Can I see them?”

For a moment, she hesitates, but takes off her multiple layers of shirts, till she’s wearing only her bra. You look at her with deep affection in your eyes. The stretch marks don’t change the fact that she’s a sight for the sore eyes, not that they carry any negative effects.

You let her lie down on the bed again, and climb on the top of her. Holding her hands in your hand, you softly ask her, “Tell me all the places where you cannot love yourself, and I will extol them for you.” and kiss her hands.

She pulls you down for an intense kiss. The emotions were much more raw than the moment you both were having.

Leaving a trail down her outline, you reach the waist. “You are extraordinary, Wanda. I love you so much.” You begin planting kisses on her stretch marks, telling her how powerful they make her look. Wanda’s eyes shut themselves, her breathing strained. You can feel her anxiety lingering under you, so you place a warm hand on her chest to help her calm down.

She holds you gently by your nape and kisses you again, leaving no scope for breathing this time. “Thank you detka, you make me happy in ways I cannot even imagine telling you. I love you endlessly.”

[theimaginatrix27]

So it's been a year since I began delving into Star Trek fandom properly

It's officially my birthday in my timezone! This time last year, I was gushing on the server @kintatsujo made for our circle of mutual friends about the best/most well-thought-out part of my Star Trek AU, now dubbed Galactic Warp, after its most important advancement. In a few weeks, it will be the one-year anniversary of my joining the Trek server where I would make all the friends I have in that fandom (particularly gonna shout out @roguetelepaths, who you may have noticed I've been reblogging a lot of posts from of late).

A lot has happened over the past year on that front, if I'll be quite honest. I've posted eight! fanfics for DS9 (holy shit), bringing my number of works on AO3 up into the double-digits and totalling about 140 thousand words! And there are many more to come, I assure you—the plot bunnies living in my brain evolved into tribbles and started churning out ideas for this fandom and these characters, as if making up for lost time.

I hit a lot of milestones this year (remembers the name of the first Trekfic I posted and laughs). Let's see if I can remember them all! :D

I discovered I can write Sci-fi, actually! Honestly I'm looking back at my confident assurance of the exact opposite of this and laughing, because I have proven that claim false in several ways over the past year. (See my Threshold fics for the most obvious example). But like. Also. The backdrop of one of my original series is kind of a Sci-fi setting, so I've been doing this for a while. Yeah, Kinta, laugh it up, you were right and I was very silly.

I can write Star Trek fanfics, actually, and if I mess up on anything, nobody's gonna care! I was so scared I'd embarrass myself in front of a fandom I found very intimidating, but so far, everyone's been so welcoming and people like what I've put out there! They really like it! I'm honestly humbled and grateful for all my lovely readers who have said such nice things to me in fic comments, and in private on Discord. You're all wonderful! But critically, I did make a mistake, and nobody gave a single, solitary shit. The story's an AU anyway, and people have been enjoying it, and I was worried for eleven years over nothing. You won't believe what that does for a lady's confidence.

I've learned some stuff about my own personal writing process, which is a big step forward! I've been taking in writing advice for as long as I've been fully online. I've listened to writer after writer tell me how they work, how they do things, and I've tried plenty of it myself, but to no avail. Earlier this year, I ran out of words to paste into 4TheWords, a website I'd joined several years ago because I liked its premise (turning writing into a game, where you could defeat monsters with words you wrote). I hadn't written on it live before, due to copy/paste issues I was able to resolve (the font in the site editor is different to the font I use on my computer when writing offline), but I actually started doing it because there is a particular group of enemies that are specifically time-based (all enemies have a time limit in which you must defeat them, but these guys set a timer within which you must keep typing), and I thought I could use that as freewriting sessions. Freewriting was something I'd been sure would work for me if I needed to get unstuck, and I'd actually noticed I could untangle issues I had by talking about them with friends in private, often without them even being around to help. So I tried it. And wonder of wonders! I got unstuck! On multiple stories! Just by rambling about them on a timer! And then I started writing words to defeat other enemies on the site live, and wait. How many words did I write this week? On this day? It's been a real game-changer, particularly as my edits count as more words, which impresses the fundamental truth that every word you write matters, even the ones you delete. Even the ones you edit away because the sentence didn't feel right. Even the passages that ultimately don't work. It all matters, and it all helps. And if I get stuck again, there's always the endurance monsters to help me out! About half of the stuff I've posted was shared in the last three months. And it's all thanks to 4TW. If you think this sounds cool, look them up! They're good eggs and don't support generative AI in creative writing. :)

I've also achieved a few writing firsts as a result of that last point!

This probably doesn't come as a surprise to my writer friends, but I've fully accepted the fact that the first thing I need to do as a writer is write. I have heard that a thousand times before, and I knew it was true on some level, but I would always let my anxiety and perfectionism get the better of me, and overthink myself to a standstill. With the method I've been employing on 4TW, I've had to press forward if I want to beat the clock, which has pushed my ADHD brain into doing what I want it to (part of why 4TW works for me is that it sets little deadlines outside myself. I cannot set my own deadlines, I know the person who drew up that schedule and she's too easily distracted and also likes to have fun too much). With even the low-stakes pressure of beat this guy before time runs out, I've been able to at least get started, and once I've picked up a little momentum, I get excited about my stories again, and we can have days where I write over 6000 words in twelve hours, because I don't want to stop!

I've stopped trying to force my chapters to be a certain length. I let each one be as long as it needs to be, and if that's a couple thousand words longer than the last one, fine! It achieved it's purpose for the story, and I'm not going to cut stuff when it was all important! Besides, I've noticed that each story finds its rhythm if I give it the space it needs, and the chapters end up being close to the same length anyways.

I've been getting bolder and bolder about the stories I write or consider writing! Too often in the past, I've been unsure about whether an idea will work for my audience, but the more times I've let myself be weird on main, and nobody has come out of the woodwork to yell at me for it, the easier it's been to be that little bit more wild with my ideas. And having friends to babble to helps with that too, people who tell me to go for it are super important and I appreciate every one of them!

I've actually written stories inspired by prompts! I'd never really done this before. Being prompted by a post is one thing (love ya, Threshold AU), but actually doing prompts for a challenge? That was always difficult for me. I'd always second-guess myself if I came up with any ideas for a particular prompt set, and then procrastinate on trying for years. But this year, I participated in Dominion Week, and although I've only posted four out of the seven prompt fills, I do have ideas for the other three days and will write them when the tribbles are done filling in any gaps they think should be patched in the AUs said prompt fills are relevant to. :D

Related to the above, I wrote oneshots! That stayed oneshots! And one of them stands completely on its own! That. That has never happened before. I've said several times on this blog that I'm not wired for short stories. I wrote my mother a story for her birthday and it was a backstory event from my Ylonaverse because I couldn't think of an idea that could stand on its own. And then Dominion Week happened, and I started two series of single-chapter stories, and wrote a oneshot that was a thought experiment and won't be a part of any of my currently existing AUs, and I'm still mind-blown that that even happened.

It has been a good writing year for me, in other words, despite its ups and downs.

Oh, and I also have had the capacity to Braille up my stories for a year now, and although I'm a perfectionist about this and want the Braille versions to be just right, because I intend to podfic them, I'm still very glad I can Braille things up at all.

But that was gonna happen anyway. The Brailler and paper were part of last year's birthday present, much as the binding combs and binding machine were part of this year's one. And the discussion of that part of my creative life should have its own post at some point. Probably when I have compiled enough to start actually podficking.

[forabeatofadrum]

Do you sometimes wake up and think to yourself: "Today, I am going to do something batshit insane?"

That's me today. I'm doing another WIP Wednesday Hospital. Since it's been 8 months since the last one, here's a quick reminder of the Hospital metaphor, copy-pasted from the previous Hospital post: "the WIP Wednesday Hospital is inspired by a post by @facewithoutheart​ called a WIP Wednesday Graveyard, where Christina put her abandoned WIPs to rest and I was obsessed with the idea, but I also realised that I wasn’t ready to put my WIPs to rest since I had the intention of finishing them. So instead of a graveyard, my WIPs reside in a (long-stay) hospital ward. All my WIPs are waiting for me to discharge them (aka finish them)."

As usual, I recommend people to do this as well, since it's a fun way to look back on older WIPs. Below the cut are 10 patients waiting for a visit. You can go say visit all of them, or just skip to the ones that interest you. I bolded the fandoms/ships etc. for easier browsing.

Leave your name at the desk and be safe: @quizasvivamos @blurglesmurfklaine @coffeegleek @esperantoauthor @otherworldsivelivedin @caramelcoffeeaddict @sillyunicorn @bazzybelle @dragoneggos @raenestee @tectonicduck @nightimedreamersworld @urban-sith @thnxforknowingme @captain-aralias @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @justgleekout @cerriddwenluna @tea-brigade @ivelovedhimthroughworse @moodandmist @whogaveyoupermission @bookish-bogwitch @confused-bi-queer @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @ionlydrinkhotwater @1908jmd @special-bc-ur-part-of-it @larkral @chen-chen-chen-again-chen ​ @cutestkilla ​ @nausikaaa ​/@wellbelesbian ​ @martsonmars ​ @facewithoutheart ​ @shrekgogurt @boyinjeans @rockitmans @bitbybitwrites @blackberrysummerblog @whatevertheweather @artsyunderstudy

I have two summer challenges that I signed up for, namely the Madison and More (OMGCP) and the Klaine Back-To-School AU (Glee) and both challenges are due in August and unfortunately for me I have written nothing yet. But that will change today!

I cannot tell you which prompt I claimed for Madison and More, since it's an anonymous fest, but I think this doesn't give away a lot:

Jack's tired. He's been tired for a while, which is why this vacation is needed. He's on the beach. He's lying in the water, but at the shallow part, enjoying the sun. Damn, he needed this. He can feel himself doze off.

I think I am allowed to share the prompt that inspired me for the Klaine Back-To-School AU. Like I said, I have written zero (0) words for this, but I have been thinking about this fic so here we go.

Kurt is about to lose his mind. He has no idea where it has gone wrong, but it's gone wrong. "Fuck," he yells, because he's fucked. He is so totally fucked. It's his third year as a pre-school teacher and this has never happened before. He needs to reel in the swearing before the kids arrive. He also needs to fix this mess before the kids come in. They will be devastated if they find out that ten of the classroom pets have gone missing. "Fuck!" Kurt says again. How did this happen? These animals are all cared for. They live here. This classroom is reserved for them. Kids come here to see the animals, not the other way around. Suddenly, Kurt hears a voice. "Everything all right in here?" he hears, "I heard swearing."

The joke is that I don't know how this fic ends (yet), because like Kurt, I also have no idea where the animals are.

Anyway, up to the next patient. It's the small fic idea that I came up with during my vacation. Here's Simon's POV of the "cat leaves paw prints on Baz's fancy car" fic:

Buttered Scone is a typical housecat, but every now and then I take her out for a walk. Yes, she wears a collar and a leash and she doesn’t complain at all. Penny says it’s a good thing, because this way I can keep an eye on her, since London is huge, and Buttered Scone doesn’t disrupt the local biodiversity by roaming freely. So yes, I have her under control. Most of the time. Except this time, I looked at my phone and when I turned back to Buttered Scone, she was atop of a car.

This made me realise that Buttered Scone's initials are B.S. Huh.

I am still thinking about my good ole Sarah Jane Adventures Extended Universe fic aka Luke Smith's Gay Adventures at Oxford (mostly) aka me exploring the alien side of Luke as an added bonus, so uhhh:

"Have you been up every night?” “I guess.” “That’s fine,” his mum says, “Just… please be a bit more quiet next time, okay?” “Why?” “Because you woke me up. From sleep.” Luke stares at his mum. Sleep. He’s heard of that. Maria once came over and she said she was tired because she didn’t get enough sleep. His mum told Luke that he can ask her anything. “Mum, what is sleep?” His mum looks dumbfounded. “You don’t sleep?” “I don’t know. Do I?”

Look, his super alien brain is the cumulation of thousand other brains, it makes sense that it is hard to turn off.

Patient no. 5 has been here for a while. It's Matty Chris D, our boy, aka Just Some Guy, aka the Snowbaz from an outsider perspective fic. MCD still doesn't care about the guys at all, but the existence of Simon and Baz is noticable. So what happens when Simon doesn't show up?

Simon Snow does skip class. I don’t care. But then he skips again. And again. And again. Not only that, but his friend Penelope Bunce isn’t attending classes either, and that’s extremely weird. Weirdly enough, she’s not the reason something feels off. Sure, she usually is very present in class, constantly asking questions and adding her own commentary, but it’s Simon’s absence that is weirding me out. I usually do not care about his presence in class, since he doesn’t participate as much as Penelope Bunce or Tyrannus- oh, I mean, Baz Pitch, but his absence is noticeable because there is a lack of magic surrounding us. I didn’t know I had gotten so used to the Chosen One leaking magic until now.

For context, this is the 3rd year, where Simon and Penny disappear for a few months. In the scene before this, Matt's friends lament that being the Chosen One must have some perks, cause it means you can skip class in order to save the world or something.

Okay, next one! I actually read The Sun and the Star during my vacation and it completely throws everything out of the window re: my Solangelo fic, but that's the beauty of fanfiction, isn't it? My version of getting-together is more angsty.

Nico leaves the infirmary before any more deaths occur, but they do occur in the days after. It feels like a blow to the camp that even days after the big battle against Gaia, people still die, but that is how it is. Nico spends most of his time in Cabin 13. It’s empty without Hazel, but he makes it work. He told everyone that he’s staying, and Nico is committing to that. He asks Annabeth for some decoration tips. The Stolls steal his shoes and he can’t even be mad at them. He congrats Clarissa La Rue when she gets her university acceptance letter. Jason tells Nico about his new plan for honouring the gods. Camp Half-Blood is still grieving, but life goes on.

Not going to lie, I do not know if I will ever finish this, but that's also what I said about, for example, aap noot mies.

I also published a Love, Victor fix-it last year after the series finale and I said I was going to write more fix-its (the ending really sucked, guys) and I did start one and I have been adding things to it every now and then:

Benji hurries to the bar and Victor does a double take when Benji comes back with a glass of milk. “Did… you just order that?” “You should’ve seen the barperson’s face,” Benji says with a wink and he raises his glass, “Good for your bones, you know?” “Cheers,” Victor says. “So, you come here often?” Benji asks.

I am somewhat a Venji-truther, but I just didn't like the way how they ended up together. It felt rushed and they didn't discuss why their relationship failed in the first place. They just kissed on the ferris wheel, which is a nice way to bookend the series, but come on! So in my fix-it, they meet again after 3 years of not seeing each other.

No. 7 is a quick check-in with the Glee/CO crossover. I mentioned it to @bitbybitwrites, who has recently read Carry On! In a shocking twist of events, I actually managed to come up with (a draft of) the summary before finishing the fic. The fic is far from finished, but I thought it'd be fun to share the summary:

Baz thought that his obsessive and insufferable Gleek days were behind him when the show ended, but when Simon accidentally transports the two of them into the Glee universe, his knowledge might pay off. Blaine is very confused when he realises something’s wrong at Dalton Academy and that there are two new people roaming around that clearly don’t belong here. He and Kurt try to understand what is happening. Can the four of them find a solution to this situation that doesn’t involve Baz outing himself as a Klainer 12? Will Simon finally make sense who he is now that he has Kurt and Blaine to guide him? And can Kurt and Blaine ignore the fact that their unwanted guests clearly know more about Kurt and Blaine’s lives than they let on?

No. 8 is a fic I have been stuck on for a while. It's a The Legend of Zelda fic and it definitely an example of the two cakes principle, because it's about Link being sad after Link's Awakening. I also don't know if this will ever get finished, but I like this:

Link’s playing his flute in the grass of the castle. It’s a lovely song and Zelda takes her time to enjoy it. She closes her eyes and she lets the music overtake all her senses. She lets out a happy sigh. The music abruptly stops. When Zelda opens her eyes, she sees Link looking at her with wide eyes. “Don’t stop on my account,” Zelda says. She sits down next to Link. “I don’t know that song. It’s lovely.” “Thanks.” “What is it called?” “The Ballad of the Wind Fish,” Link says and he shoots Zelda a serious and almost pleading look, as if he wants Zelda to recognise it. She has to disappoint him.

Hey, remember AU, Please!, the OMGCP fest all about AUs? I wrote Center Ice for it. I love that fic. But I actually had another prompt that I claimed, but I had to let it go since I didn't have time to finish it. It's about Dex's unusual power. The mods allow writers to publish it later outside of the fest, ....

His mother had sat him down when he was six years old. She crouched in front of him. “My son, one day, you will unlock the family’s secret power. It’s been passed through from generation to generation and only one person each generation has the power. We do not know how it works exactly, since it’s not passed down from parent to child, but it is within our family, and we have reasons to believe you are the chosen one.” Now, Will loved Superman, so he was stoked to hear that he had powers. Unfortunately for him, the powers of his family are less fortunate. “You will have the ability to turn into a lobster, my son. Use it wisely.”

And lastly, a returning patient who will be semi-discharged soon. It's my fic about Asian identity in Glee. It got some renewed interest after I mentioned it on my post about Jenna's comments on the racism she experienced. As a result, I am thinking about posting it as a series of standalone ficlets. The reason I haven't started doing that is because I don't have a title or anything. Classic.

Anyway, this was inspired by, I guess, my life, but it is in on my mind again after I saw someone wear a bamboo hat on the train station. I wish I had the courage to just... do that. Kinda messed up that I am too afraid to wear Chinese clothing in public due to backslash, but that is life.

Tina stares at her hanbok. It is beautiful. It is by far one of the most beautiful pieces of clothing that she's ever owned. It's to small for her now. Her mother bought it for her when she was in Korea with Mrs. Danvers and An Unnamed Character. That was years ago. Tina was still a child and she was so happy when her mother showed it. Times were simpler back then, because Tina would soon learn that others did not share her joy. Every time she would wear it in public, people saw it as a reason to target her with racially slurs. Tina wanted to feel pretty, but they made it clear that she was ugly in their round eyes. So Tina put it back in the closet and she could only wear it once a year during Halloween, when she would dress up "as a Korean" and she'd be surrounded by all the other white girls with cheap Geisha-esque wigs, taped back eyes, flimsy fans and whatever "Oriental costume" they bought from Target. It's such a beautiful hanbok, and it got reduced to a Halloween costume, and now Tina's grown too much to wear it.

I actually cleaned out my childhood bedroom today and I found the shoes that my mother brought from China (together with the cheongsam that inspired this snippet) and yeah, they don't fit anymore, just like the cheongsam.

Okay, damn, sorry to end this visit on a bummer, so have an extra snippet from the same fic that is more upbeat:

“Mike, it’s Wes!” Tina says excitedly and she clutches her boyfriend’s arm. She is completely ignoring the fight she had with Mike, since she is so excited. “AsianDancer?” Wes asks, sounding expectant, “Or just Mike?” Mike takes a look at Wes and he does a double take when he sees that Wes is wearing a Dalton uniform. “GavelMan92?" Wes nods. "You’ve got to be kidding me,” Mike says as well.

AsianDancer 🤝 GavelMan92 🤝 XxGothGirlTayTayxX BFFS 4 ever!!!

Anyway, if you've made it this far, have a flower 🌺 as well.

[lazyfandombean]

So bury your roots (Deltarune - Sweet-centric)

Summary: He wasn’t sure why he’d decided to fix it. Maybe because it gave him something to do that didn’t have to do with survival. Or maybe it was because he wondered if they were the same; if he’d been thrown away because he was broken. --- Sweet spends the first seven years of his life not knowing who he was or why he was abandoned. He spends the next seven years of his life figuring it all out. --- A.k.a.: Sweet gets adopted by Queen and also meets the CC in SCC AU, all built around ONE SINGULAR JOKE THAT I HAD NO INTENTION OF WRITING SO MUCH FOR. Anyway sorry I suck at summaries :') Warnings: Lots of manipulation, a bunch of hurt/comfort, and SCC ARE BROTHERS AGENDA!!! Also angst. ALSO be warned that this is entirely unedited and not beta-read and I hate it very much but I'm posting it anyway out of spite for the sleep I lost finishing it. Also also this was supposed to be crack. It is not crack anymore. Also also also it uses an unhealthy amounts of headcanons. I've added too many also's. Words: 17,657 Notes: I'm gonna be honest, I have no clue what I'm doing here. I've never actually cross-posted a fic onto Tumblr before, so if this format isn't working, just let me know and I can figure out something else. ALSO there's some stuff in the author's notes of the Ao3 version of this fic that are exclusive to that site (mostly because I don't feel like copy-pasting all of that and fitting it into this format). A link to the Ao3 series will be at the end of this fic so you can check those notes out if you want.

— — —

He first met her while he was playing in an alleyway. Not the one he usually stayed at, but it was close to the Queen’s castle, so that meant it had the best food. He wasn’t there to eat though; instead, he sat in a little corner fiddling with a small robot. 

He’d found the poor thing in one of the dumpsters. From what he could tell, it used to be able to walk and move its arms up and down, and it even had a little button that played garbled music when pressed. But it had been broken, so it’d been thrown away. 

He wasn’t sure why he’d decided to fix it. Maybe because it gave him something to do that didn’t have to do with survival. Or maybe it was because he wondered if they were the same; if he’d been thrown away because he was broken. 

He didn’t think about it too hard as he shuffled and fixed various parts. He didn’t totally know what he was doing, but somehow he could tell when he’d gotten something wrong or right. There was a remote that the robot was supposed to have that he hadn’t been able to find, but that was fine; he could build one for it later. 

He’d just managed to fix the speakers that played the song (turns out it was hip-hop; not his favorite, but not bad) when a shadow suddenly loomed over him and said, “Wow Cool Robot.”

He looked up and replied, “Thank you,” because you were always supposed to be polite to strangers. Especially the Queen. 

She looked down at him, tilting her head as question marks appeared on her visor. “Why Are You Sitting In: My Backyard?”

“Sorry,” he said automatically, “I didn’t know this was your back...yard.” He held up the robot as it continued to play a song he didn’t know. “I was fixing him.”

“Fixing Him?” She repeated, looking down at the toy. He nodded. “Was He Broken?”

He nodded again. “He’s supposed to walk an’ his speakers were messed up before,” he explained. “I fixed his speakers and legs ‘n stuff, but I can’t find the remote to make him move.” 

“That Is: Impressive,” She said with a hum. “Most Children I’ve Met Don’t Know How To Do Stuff Like That Yet; Even The Bigger Ones. What’s Your Name?”

“I don’t have one,” he replied, wondering what she meant by ‘bigger ones’. “What’s yours?” He mentally kicked himself for asking that— obviously her name was the Queen. 

She didn’t reply for a moment, and he felt his system heating up in embarrassment. He was right about to apologize for the dumb question when she answered, “Technically My Name Is Serial Number Q5U4EX7YY2E9N, But Most People Call Me: Queen.” 

He blinked his eye. “Oh. Well… it’s nice to meet you, Queen.” Probably. Meeting the Queen should be nice, right? 

“It’s Nice To Meet You Too, Nameless Child,” she replied, before pausing and shaking her head, the word NOPE flashing onto her screen. “No, No, I Can’t Just List You As: Nameless Child; Too Long.” She looked at him. “Are You Sure You Don’t Have A Name? Not Even A Designation?”

He shook his head, unsure of what a ‘designation’ was, but unwilling to ask. She made a weird ticking noise with her mouth. “Well, What Can I Call You Then?” She looked back at him, but kinda seemed like she was looking more through him, so he didn’t answer. After a moment, she snapped her fingers. “I Will Call You: Sweet. Because You Are: Sweet. How Does That Sound, Sweet?”

He paused, thinking about it. It sounded nice, and he’d never had a name before; having one might be fun. Sweet nodded. “Good. Thank you for the name.” 

Queen waved a hand dismissively. “No Need To Thank Me. I Already Know I’m The Best.” And then, to his surprise, she held her hand out to him. He flinched, because people usually only did that if they were gonna hit him, but she didn’t; she just kept it there as she spoke again. “How Would You Like To Come To My Mansion? We Can Like. Watch TV Or Shrink In The Acid Pool Or Something.” 

Sweet had no idea what either of those things were, but he definitely wasn’t gonna pass up the opportunity to see Queen’s castle in person. And even the inside! He moved the robot in the crook of his arm and reached his hand out to hers, hesitating at the last second to see if she’d move it away. When she didn’t, her eyes just changing to four question marks again, he grabbed her hand. It was warm. “Yes ma’am.” 

— — —

Two of Queen’s friends — Tasque Manager and Swatch, she’d told him — didn’t seem to like Sweet very much when they’d first seen him. It’d made him nervous at first, because he didn’t want to get kicked out right as he got there, but Queen reassured him (after having some long fight with her friends) that he wasn’t gonna he kicked out, and that apparently they were just worried because the first thing they saw him doing was getting into the ‘acid pool’ with Queen, which was apparently ‘unsafe for children’. To be honest, he wasn’t entirely sure what was going on or what any of that meant, but he was just glad he got to see more of Queen’s castle. 

After that, they’d started on a tour; then being Sweet, Queen, and Tasque Manager. Queen was the main guide, but sometimes she’d get distracted or start rambling, which was usually followed by Tasque Manager reminding her of what they were doing. It was a lot of fun! He got to see all of the guest rooms (although there was one they wouldn’t show him), all of the dining halls, all of the paintings… and all of the pottery. Queen really loved pottery for some reason. Maybe ‘cause they all looked like her face. 

By the time the tour was over, Cyber City had gotten dark; well, as dark as it ever got. Sweet was reminded of the fact that he hadn’t eaten yet when his lower speaker growled. It was then that he wondered if he’d overstayed his welcome, if he should leave, but instead of being kicked out by Queen or her friends, they instead made dinner for him, which he ate happily. It was even better fresh than it was from the garbage, and he didn’t have to worry about anyone trying to steal it from him here! 

They all got really weird looks when he mentioned this, though, so he didn’t talk about it after that. 

Queen made him play this game called ‘Minecrap’ on her phone after dinner, which was fun. He really sucked at it though, so he just watched her play for a while. His eye started getting droopy as more time passed, and as more of Cyber City’s lights winked out (but not all of them; never all of them), he started to feel more and more guilty for taking up so much time. So, once Queen had beaten this thing called ‘the Ender Dragon’ after her ‘speedrun’, he decided it was time to rip the band-aid off. 

“So when do I have to go?” He asked hesitantly once she’d turned off the phone. “Because I can leave now if you want.” 

She paused, and for the nth time this evening, he wondered what he’d said that was wrong. “Do You Have A: House To Go Back To?” 

Sweet winced. Was it bad to not have a house? “No,” he muttered, scuffing his shoe on the floor. 

Queen shrugged, putting up her phone. “Then You Don’t.”

He blinked. “Don’t what?”

“You Don’t Have To Go.”

He froze. “What?” 

She turned towards him, seemingly noticing his utter confusion. “Well I’m Not Just Going To Toss You Back Onto The Streets,” she said, which only confused him more, because that was exactly what he’d expected her to do. “Why Do You Think I Showed You A Room Labeled: Sweet’s Room?” 

He blinked. He’d forgotten about that room. And that Sweet was his name now, when he saw it. “Oh.”

…

“Wait, didn’t you just name me like… three hours ago? How’d you make a room and a label in three hours?”

“The Swatchlings Are: Fast As Heck.” 

— — —

Being a permanent resident of Queen’s castle (or mansion, as she often corrected) was probably the best thing that’d ever happened to him. He got to eat regularly, was allowed to play with whatever he wanted, wherever he wanted (as long as it was in the castle and also not the acid pool), and he even got a bunch of clothes from Queen! Even if they were kinda hard to fit over his box-shaped head and body. 

There was some stuff he didn’t like, though. Queen made him do stuff like school (which wasn’t very hard for him, but it still wasn’t fun), and he had to get check-ups from an Ambyu-Lance a lot, and it always took a while, and he always had to stay still, which was annoying. Those were helpful though, ‘cause they were able to figure out a lot of stuff even he didn’t know about himself. Like the fact that according to his ‘make and model’, he was around seven, he was short for his age, and only having one eye was normal for him. 

So it wasn’t information that he liked hearing, but it was good to have. 

He still had a lot of fun, though! Playing with the Swatchlings was fun (even though they only really played when Queen told them to), and the tasques were all super fluffy and soft, and they didn’t even hiss at him anymore after the first week or so! He liked hanging out with Queen, Swatch, and Tasque Manager too, but they were too busy for him to play with very often. 

Which was the biggest problem, actually; he didn’t really have a lot of people to play with. Even the Swatchlings couldn’t stay with him all the time (they still had other guests to attend to, after all), and other than the Addisons who would sometimes come to visit Queen, he was pretty much left by himself when he wasn’t learning or playing– which was a lot of the time. He spent most of his days wandering around Queen’s mansion, exploring the places that hadn’t been on the tour. He even found a bunch of secret shortcuts all throughout the mansion! 

He avoided the guest room that they had kept him away from, though. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know what was inside. 

But even then, within the first couple of weeks in the mansion, he’d explored all there was to explore. Every secret hallway, every floor of the mansion, every room… the only place he hadn’t explored was the basement, and that was only because it was always locked (and no one even acknowledged there was a basement at all when he asked). So it didn’t take long for him to get bored. 

Sweet knew he shouldn’t complain, and he didn’t! Not out loud, at least. It was a lot better than when he didn’t have a house; back then, he didn’t have anyone to play with, and he didn’t have regular meals, and he didn’t have other changes of clothes, and he didn’t have any protection from stuff like Virovirokuns or maice. He could deal with a little loneliness, especially when he had so much other stuff that he hadn’t had before. 

Then again, he didn’t really have the time to worry about loneliness back then. 

He never brought it up to Queen or Tasque Manager or anyone, but apparently they noticed anyways, because after almost a month of him living there, Queen decided to send him and Swatch out to the Cyber Fields for a ‘vacation day’, but she was too busy to go with them. He wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but Queen saying ‘Go Make Lots And Lots Of Friends While You’re Gone’ was what really tipped him off. 

And he tried, he really did. The Cyber Fields were really fun and were so much different from the City. Swatch didn’t seem to like it very much, but he never said anything and took Sweet wherever he wanted to go, so Sweet figured it was okay. Actually making friends, though, was harder than it sounded. He met a lot of people, like the Plugboys and some Darkner named ‘Fommt’, but he wasn’t ever able to ask to be friends before they had to go somewhere. 

He’d been thinking about giving up when he met them. 

Swatch was busy buying CD Bagels from a vendor, leaving Sweet to wander aimlessly. He didn’t really know where he was going; he just wanted to walk around. 

He eventually found a place that looked a lot like a trash dump, except it looked like someone had been trying to build something with the trash. He walked around, picking up a piece of ‘junk’ about half his size and examining it. It looked like a broken engine… maybe he could–

“Hey, what’re you doin’ with our stuff?” A voice yelled from behind him, startling Sweet enough to almost drop the engine. He tightened his grip at the last second, preventing it from crashing towards the ground and breaking even more as he turned around. 

A Darkner with a cassette player for a head pointed at him… angrily? It was hard to tell, because he was wearing sunglasses, as well as a blue jacket that looked a little too big for him with a white shirt and black pants. Behind him stood a taller Darkner who had a CD player for a head, wearing a black jacket and green pants. 

“Sorry,” Sweet apologized, putting down the engine with care. “I didn’t know this stuff was yours. I was just looking.” 

The Darkner huffed, but he stopped pointing at Sweet. “Well, it is. But I guess it’s okay if you didn’t know.” He crossed his arms. “Who’re you?” 

“I’m Sweet,” Sweet replied, fiddling with his fingers now that there was nothing in his hands. “What’re your names?” 

The other jabbed a finger at himself and the monster behind him. “I’m Cap’n, and that’s my older brother Cakes,” he informed, then grinned. “And this is our shop!” He gestured around the junkyard. “Or, it’s gonna be. We’re working on it.” 

“You can just call me K_K,” the other monster spoke up. “It’s short for Cakes!” 

Sweet waved. “It’s nice to meet you two,” he said. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Cap’n waved a hand, walking over to Sweet. He stopped just in front of him, pausing. “So where’re you from? I’ve never seen you in the fields before.” 

“I’m from the City,” Sweet explained, pointing out towards where you could just barely see the city’s large buildings over the horizon. “I’ve never been to the fields before.” 

Cakes, who’d stayed behind, tilted his head and spoke again. “Really? What’s the city like?” 

“Big,” Sweet said with a nod. “ Really big. And blue. And there’s lots of lights everywhere. And it’s super noisy.” 

“We barely get any noise in the fields,” Cap’n complained, moving to sit on a pile of junk. “The only people who ever wanna make any noise are me ‘n K_K!” 

Sweet looked down at the engine he’d set by his feet. “Sometimes I feel like it’s too noisy,” he muttered. “I can’t even hear myself over it, sometimes.” 

“That sounds like it sucks,” Cap’n replied, picking up a piece of junk and messing with it. “Especially since you’re a speaker ‘n all.” Sweet just nodded, and Cakes started to pick up some junk too, tweaking some of its parts. Sweet tilted his head. “So you guys are making a shop… out of the junkyard?” 

“Yup,” Cap’n replied. “No one ever does anything with the junk here in the fields, so me ‘n K_K decided to turn it into a shop where we can build things and sell music!” “The music’s free,” Cakes added, stacking some junk up in a pile. “What?! Why’re we even gonna play music then?” 

Sweet watched them work and talk for a minute, starting to feel a little nervous. “Can I help?” he asked suddenly, causing them to pause. “Build the shop, I mean.” 

“Nuh-uh.” “Sure!” 

Sweet felt his spirits fall and lift at the same time, which was a confusing feeling. 

Cap’n whipped his head around to look at Cakes. “K_K! This is our thing!” 

Cakes shrugged, putting another box down. “So? We can let him help too. It’ll go faster that way.”

Cap’n opened his mouth, but paused, closing it again. “That’s true,” he muttered, looking at the ground. Then he looked back at Sweet. “Are you any good at building stuff?” 

Sweet blinked. “Um, I think so. Sometimes I fix robots for fun?” 

“See?” Cakes said, giving Cap’n a look. The latter stuck his tongue out at Cakes, before looking back at Sweet. 

“Fine, you can help. But don’t expect us to pay you!” Sweet beamed. “I won’t, thank you!” 

They spent the next hour talking and working on the shop, getting to know each other. Cap’n told him that his name was short for something, but he wouldn’t tell him what. Cakes told him about everything to do in the Cyber Fields, including the unfinished roller coaster. Sweet told them about playing with the Swatchlings in Queen’s mansion; which had sparked a whole new topic of conversation.

“Woah, you live in Queen’s mansion?”  

Sweet nodded in answer to Cap’n’s question, soldering a few pieces of junk together (no, he was not going to question where they got the soldering iron). “Yeah, I met her a month ago and she gave me a name and then let me stay in her house ‘cause I didn’t have one! She’s really nice.”

“Huh,” was Cap’n’s response. He set down a CD bagel he’d been munching on (apparently Cakes was really good at making them). “So she’s like your mom?”

Sweet blinked. “What’s a mom?” 

“It’s a grown-up that takes care of you who’s usually a girl,” Cakes answered, pushing around a broken toy car instead of helping. “Vroom vroom.”

“Oh.” Sweet paused to think about it. “Maybe. I’ll ask her when I get back.” 

A loud, somewhat shrill voice suddenly pierced through the air, shrieking Sweet’s name. It took a minute for Sweet to recognize the voice (both from its high pitch and the fact that it made his ears hurt), but once he realized it was Swatch’s voice, he set down the soldering iron. “Sorry guys, I think I gotta go.” 

“Aw, really?” Cap’n whined. “But I wanted to hear more about Queen! She must be a very fine madimoyselle!” 

“A what?” Sweet muttered, confused, but shook his head. “Sorry, but I really do have to go.” He winced as Swatch’s unusually high-pitched voice rang out again. “I don’t wanna get in trouble or something.” 

“That’s okay,” Cakes said, putting down the toy car. “You can tell us more next time.”

Sweet brightened. “Next time? Y’mean I can come back?” 

“He can?” Cap’n asked incredulously, but paused when Cakes gave him a  look. “I mean, sure. Yeah, you can come back ‘nd help some more. And tell us all about Queen!” 

“Okay! Thanks, guys!” Sweet beamed. “I’ll see you…” he trailed off for a second, but quickly moved on, “Whenever Queen lets me come again!” 

“See ya later then, Sweet!” Cap’n waved with a grin. 

Cakes waved too. “Smell ya!” 

“Bye!” Sweet waved back at them both, skipping out of the shop. He got to come back, and they were even letting him help work on the shop! 

Did this mean he had friends now? 

Sweet was jolted out of his thoughts when he suddenly bumped into a tall figure. He looked up, only to be met with the panicked and stern face of Swatch. 

Oops. 

— �� —

Despite the fact that Swatch had initially gotten onto him for running off, he did seem happy that Sweet had made friends. Even if he got a funny look on his face when Sweet had mentioned meeting them in the junkyard. Still, he let Sweet rant about it the whole way back, and didn’t even stop him once they’d gotten back to Queen’s mansion. 

Queen herself had been glad to hear that Sweet had made friends too! Or, he thought so, anyway. Sometimes it was hard to tell what she was feeling. 

He mentioned that they’d said he could come back sometime, and asked if Queen would let him. She seemed hesitant at first for some reason, but eventually they worked something out: Sweet could go once a week as long as he got all of his studies done before mid-afternoon. Sweet agreed readily; even if school wasn’t fun, at least it was easy! And that meant he got to see his friends again! 

Right before Queen was about to send him off to dinner (she couldn’t join ‘cause of a meeting, apparently), Sweet paused, remembering something. “Hey, Queen?” 

Queen hummed in response, not seeming to really be paying attention. “Yes Sweetie Pie?” 

“Are you my mom?” 

Queen froze, and for the first time since he’d met her, her visor went totally blank. Weird. “Haha Sweet That’s A Good Question How About You Go Help The Swatchlings With The Maice Okay Bye.” She walked away suddenly, leaving Sweet feeling very confused.

Especially since they’d gotten rid of the Maice problem over a month ago. There was always a chance they’d come back in the seven hours he’d been gone though. 

— — —

Going back to the Cyber Fields to help Cap’n and Cakes (or K_K, as he kept insisting Sweet call him) with the shop quickly became the highlight of Sweet’s weeks. He never thought he’d find people who liked building and music as much as he did, and it was awesome! The only bad part about it was when Sweet had to leave. 

They bombarded him with questions about the City every time they saw him (although Cap’n’s were mostly related to girls), and he asked just as many about the Cyber Fields. They always made it sound so nice that he thought they had loads of friends, but to his surprise, they just shrugged and said they didn’t when he asked how many. 

“I think everyone’s just intimidated by our coolness,” Cap’n had explained, K_K nodding along. Sweet found it hard to disagree; Cap’n and K_K were pretty cool. 

“So is Queen your mom?” Cap’n had asked another time, to which Sweet had just shrugged. 

“I dunno. She dodges the question every time I ask.” Literally, too. She’d jumped in the acid pool to get away. 

“Bummer.” 

They asked him that a lot, Sweet realized; Cap’n most of the time, but K_K asked every now and again if Queen was his mom yet. It made him wonder…

“Who’s your mom?” Sweet asked as he took a screwdriver to a particularly stubborn screw. The question made Cap’n and K_K pause, glancing at each other before looking back at him. 

“We don’t have one,” Cap’n replied, messing with a pair of headphones. “We live in the orphanage,” K_K added, eating a CD bagel while drawing with his other hand. 

Sweet paused. “Oh. I’m sorry.” 

“Why? It’s not your fault,” K_K asked. 

“Yeah, and it’s not like you’ve got a mom either,” Cap’n shrugged. “We’re all momless. Unless Queen really is your mom.” 

Sweet shrugged too. “I can keep asking, but I don’t think she’ll answer.”

Despite the ‘heavy discussion topics’ (That’s what Swatch called them, anyway), visiting Cap’n and K_K was always his favorite part of the day. He started talking about them so much that Queen even decided to let him visit twice a week! Life was going really well for him, better than it had for his whole seven years of existence. 

Things didn’t stay that way, though. 

— — —

Sweet was thirteen when he first started hearing Queen talk about someone called ‘The Knight’. He wasn’t sure what that meant or who that was, but once he started pestering enough, Queen eventually told him that the Knight was a Lightner, come to enlighten their great City. 

Sweet was excited at first (Lightners were what gave them purpose, right?), but as Queen began talking about the Knight more and more, she started spending less and less time with him. So did Swatch and Tasque Manager, with their responsibilities practically being doubled. Even the Swatchlings only ever helped him with chores and studying anymore; the rest of their time was spent serving Queen and the Knight. He wasn’t sure why the Knight needed so much of the staff, but it wasn’t his place to ask. 

At least one good thing came from this, though, and that was the fact that he got to hang out with Cap’n and K_K pretty much every day! As soon as his studies were finished (or sometimes even before; Queen didn’t notice much anymore), a Swatchling would take him down to the Cyber Fields to visit their junk shop. It was fully built now, and Cap’n and K_K had started selling CD Bagels out of it. They let Sweet help too, and he even got a cut of the profit (despite him vaguely remembering that Cap’n said he wouldn’t)! 

He even got to have sleepovers if Queen was too busy to send a Swatchling to pick him up! Like right now. 

“Why’d you run away from the orphanage anyway?” He asked, settling into the blanket pile they’d made on the floor. They didn’t have any beds, but that was fine; Sweet was still used to sleeping on the concrete (or cardboard, if he was lucky), and the big pile of blankets was much more fun than a regular bed anyway. 

“‘Cause it sucked,” Cap’n deadpanned, leaning back on the blankets with his arms crossed behind his head. “None of the kids liked us ‘cause of my fingers and K_K’s…” he gestured at K_K, who was busy rearranging some of the blankets. “Y’know. And none of the adults were able to help. They didn’t even try, sometimes.” 

“Oh…” Sweet muttered. He stared up at the ceiling, his soul twisting for them. “You know… if you guys wanted to come live in Queen’s mansion with me, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.” 

Cap’n scoffed. “You kidding? First of all, I don’t really wanna go anywhere near that place if that ‘Knight’ you keep talkin’ about is around,” he started, K_K nodding along as he too laid down in the blankets. 

Sweet rolled his eye. “They’re a Lightner, Cap. It’s like, the best thing that’s happened to us in… in ages .” He tried to mean it, but it still felt like a lie coming out of his speaker. 

“Yeah yeah,” Cap’n waved a hand. “Second of all, though, livin’ it up in her fancy mansion… as fun as it sounds, it’s not really me ‘nd K_K’s style, y’know?” 

“My style is funky tunes,” K_K agreed. 

“And like heck we’re abandoning the junk shop,” Cap’n added. “We built this thing with our own bare hands!” “And soldering irons,” K_K said. 

“Well, duh, but you get the point!” “I get it, I get it, jeez,” Sweet said with a sigh. “I wouldn’t wanna make you abandon it anyway. I helped build this thing too, y’know.” 

“So we’re at an agreement!” Cap’n huffed. “You go live in Queen’s big fancy castle and we’ll stay in our junk shop.” Sweet pulled the blankets up over himself. “When you say it like that, it makes me feel bad,” he murmured. 

“Don’t,” K_K said with a shrug, pulling other blankets over himself and a squawking Cap’n. “You’re happy in the mansion. We’re happy here.” 

“Oh… okay.” 

The three lapsed into silence after that. Sweet stared up at the now barely visible ceiling; it got a lot darker in the Cyber Fields than it did in the City. It should have made falling asleep easier, but instead, Sweet found himself unable to power down. He tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable (which was already hard enough with his box-shaped head), but what K_K had said was really getting under his circuits for some reason. 

He was happy at the mansion, he was. He was definitely happier there than he’d been on the streets, so that had to count for something, right? In her mansion he had food, a bed, nice clothes… it was his first real home, so he should be happy there. And he was. 

Or, he had been. 

As he turned his head to look at the two next to him, he wasn’t sure he was anymore. 

It made him feel ungrateful, but… he hadn’t talked to Queen in person in a long time. He saw Cap’n and K_K much more often than he saw Tasque Manager. He talked to them about what was going on in his life much more than he’d told Swatch in quite some time. He’d played more games with them than he could ever remember having played with the Swatchlings. 

He stared at the (supposedly) sleeping forms of Cap’n and K_K. He was… happier with them than he was at Queen’s mansion. 

Was it possible to have two homes? 

“Hey guys,” he said, suddenly having an idea. Whether or not it was a good one remained to be seen. “Are you guys awake?” 

“Yes,” K_K spoke up, causing Cap’n to groan and stir. 

“I am now ,” he grumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. “Whaddaya want?” 

“We should form a band.” 

Silence for a moment. 

“Well duh, that’s why we made the shop, isn’t it?” Cap’n deadpanned, flopping back down onto the blankets. “Let me go back to sleep.”

“I wanna do it now,” K_K replied, sitting up to look at Sweet. “Can I be a keyboard?”

Sweet blinked. “Do you mean play a keyboard, or do you actually wanna be a keyboard?” 

“Yes.” 

Cap’n groaned, rolling over to give Sweet a half-hearted glare. “Fine, we’ll talk about it now,” he muttered, sitting up again. “Don’t know why you two couldn’t wait until mornin’, you maniacs.” 

“I can be the DJ! I’ve been working on a special turntable, too!” Sweet said excitedly, before pausing. “Wait, I thought you guys made the shop to sell CD Bagels.” 

“Yeah, and music, remember?” Cap’n muttered with a yawn. “So obviously we were always gonna make a band.” 

“Oh, right.” Sweet nodded, but paused again. “But wasn’t that just gonna be yours and K_K’s thing?” He hesitated. “Is… is it okay if I’m there?” 

Cap’n and K_K both stared for a bit. 

“Sweet, you helped build the shop,” K_K said. “You were always gonna be part of the band.” 

“...Oh.” 

They eventually started talking about who’d do what, and how they’d advertise their band, and what they’d name it. They stayed up almost the entire night, and yet the whole time, neither Cap’n nor K_K said anything about the fact that a tear would fall from Sweet’s eye every now and again. 

— — — 

The band’s start was pretty rough. They advertised it as much as they could, but there weren’t enough people in the Cyber Fields who really cared about music enough to come to their concerts. Even when they handed out flyers while selling CD Bagels (which they always sold a LOT of; K_K really did make the best food), the only person who ever came to their performances was an overly-enthusiastic Plugboy who couldn’t even make it to all of their shows. 

It was nice that at least one person really liked their music, though. Which made Sweet feel kinda bad for what he ended up suggesting. 

“Playing in the city? ” Cap’n scoffed, packing up his box of CD Bagels (not that there were many left). “You’re outta your mind, Sweet. We’ve never been to the city; they’d crush us out there!” 

“I don’t wanna be a soda can,” K_K agreed, his own box already under his arm. 

“Come on, guys,” Sweet groaned, folding up his own cardboard box as they started to head back. “I know it’s big and daunting, but I really think we’d find a bigger audience there! Plus, I could be your guide!” 

Cap’n kicked the door of the shop open with a grunt. “You, our guide? Sweet, you’ve not lived on the streets of the city since…” He paused in the doorway, causing K_K to bump into him. “Sorry K_K. But still, it’s been what, five, six years since you started livin’ in Queen’s mansion?” 

Sweet rolled his eye as they all filed into the shop. “Just because I don’t live on the streets anymore doesn’t mean I don’t remember anything about them. Plus, I still live in the City . I don’t just spend all my time in the mansion, y’know.” 

“I think you spend most of your time here, actually,” K_K piped up, which, yeah, that was a fair point. Sweet spent so much time at the Cyber Fields that sometimes he’d forget he lived in the city until a Swatchling came to pick him up. 

Still, he didn’t want to back down from this, but he didn’t know how he’d be able to convince the two of them to try playing in the City. Unless…

“Hey Cap,” he said as he closed the door. “Don’t you think it’d be cool if we met some ladies while we were performing?” Cap’n froze. “Sweet, no.” 

“I’m just sayin’, the City’s full of girls who’d love to hear us play.” “I’m not fallin’ for that, Sweet.” 

“I could probably even get Queen to listen to one of our concerts.” 

Cap’n whirled around, pointing finger guns at Sweet. “Well why didn’t ya say that sooner? It’s a deal.” 

K_K, who’d just been staring for the entirety of the interaction, frowned. “I’d rather stay in the Cyber Fields,” he muttered. 

Sweet patted his arm. “The Cyber Fields are good and all, but don’t you think it’d be nice to find people that actually appreciate our music?” he asked. “Plus, I bet I could get Swatch to give you some recipes from the Color Cafe.” 

K_K hesitated, thinking it over for a moment before sighing. “Okay,” he said. “Can we still play in the Cyber Fields sometimes though?” 

“Of course!” Sweet nodded. “We still have to sell CD Bagels y’know! We’ll just play more music in the city.” 

“Just for the madimoyselles,” Cap’n added. “And K_K’s recipes.” 

Sweet rolled his eye. “I don’t think that’s how you pronounce it, but sure.” 

— — — 

Just as Sweet had predicted, their music was a hit in the City. Within fifteen minutes of the first place they tried (which they did ask permission to play at before performing), Darkners were coming out of stores and pausing in their walks to listen to their music. Which didn’t surprise Sweet in the slightest; despite the fact that Cyber City had all of the most famous music artists and songs playing in almost every store, it could be hard to actually hear the music over all the traffic, Addisons, and general noise of the City. 

Luckily, Sweet Cap’n Cakes had gotten really good at being loud. 

Their concert was pretty short, mostly meant to gauge the interest of the people there, but way more people stuck around until the end (ten whole Darkners!!), and some even asked for their flyers by the time they were done! 

There were still a few… complications though. 

“Watch out, K_K!” Sweet and Cap’n pulled on K_K’s arms, yanking him away from the street just as a torrent of cars flooded through. Sweet and Cap’n both flinched back, but K_K tilted his head as he stared out at the traffic. 

Cap’n glanced up at him in worry. “You alright, K_K? You didn’t get hurt, did ya?” 

“Do you think she’s single?” Sweet blinked in confusion. “What?” K_K pointed at one of the pink cars, crawling at a snail’s pace compared to the rest of the traffic. “Do you think she’s single?” he asked again.

“...That’s a car, K_K.” 

“Yeah.” 

Crisis temporarily averted, they moved on, looking for another place that would allow them to perform. They’d gotten unfortunately delayed by a lot of traffic, so most business turned them down as evening descended on Cyber City. 

Sweet sighed as they walked out of yet another store that refused to let them play in front of their shop. “Sorry guys, I really did think we’d get more listeners out here…” He scuffed his shoes on the ground as he walked. Cap’n shrugged. “Eh, it’s no big deal. Plus, we did get a lot more people than normal! We’ll just come out earlier next tiIIME-” Cap’n suddenly dodged out of the way, pulling Sweet and K_K with him. Sweet was confused until a Viroviriokun rushed past, closely followed by an Ambyu-lance. Sweet’s system heated in embarrassment; he was supposed to be the one leading them around the city, and he didn’t even notice the Darkners coming. 

K_K straightened up, grabbing Cap’n and Sweets hands to pull them away from the oncoming crowds. “There’s a lot more viruses out here than in the fields,” he mumbled. 

Sweet winced. “Yeah, sorry I forgot to warn you guys about that.” 

“So that’s normal? ” Cap’n brows raised so high that they were visible above his sunglasses. “And you lived in this?” 

Sweet shrugged as the three of them started walking. “I mean, yeah, but I didn’t really stick around these parts,” he explained. “And besides, I wasn’t out there for too long before I met–” He froze, then face-palmed. “Sorry, guys, I completely forgot to ask Queen if I could bring you over to the mansion…” 

Cap’n shrugged. “Eh, it’s fine. You can ask later and we’ll just see her next time.” He moved away to avoid a passing Addison. “Preferably somewhere that’s not crawlin’ with viruses and Maddisons.” 

“Addisons,” Sweet corrected. 

“Potato, potahto.” 

Sweet sighed. “Whatever. I’m still sorry I forgot to ask, though. Maybe I can–” He didn’t finish the thought as he bumped into something, yelping as Cap’n and K_K steadied him. The three of them looked up at the figure they’d run into. A Swatchling looked back down at them– or rather, down at Sweet. They blinked, and in a monotone voice, spoke up over the crowd, “Queen requests your presence back at the mansion.” Sweet gulped; lately, whenever Queen called for him herself, it was because he was in trouble one way or another (not that he ever really got any consequences, but Queen being disappointed in him never felt good). He hesitated, looking back at his friends, when an idea struck him; a way to fulfill his earlier promise to Cap’n and K_K and also maybe not get in trouble. He tilted his head at them, a silent question. It took a minute for them to get it, but once they did, they both nodded excitedly. 

He looked back at the Swatchling. “Can my friends come too?” 

— — — 

Bringing Cap’n and K_K in to meet Queen had been circuit-wracking. He knew that realistically that Queen wouldn’t mind —she never had before, after all— but that hadn’t stopped his soul from pounding loudly in his chest as he introduced them; so loudly he almost thought that it could be heard from his speakers. 

Judging by the lack of comments on it, that probably wasn’t true. 

He’d say it went pretty well, though. Even with Cap’n calling Queen ‘hot mama’ (Sweet heated up so much his speakers nearly cut out) and K_K talking about various objects he wanted to be (which, surprisingly, was a topic that Queen seemed to actually be invested in), Queen seemed to like his friends. 

Well, like might have been a strong word. She’d only gotten harder to read since the Knight came alone. 

Still, his hopes of no longer being in trouble were dashed once K_K and Cap’n left. This time, it was because he’d forgotten to tell her that he’d even be going to the Cyber Fields and then the City at all today, which was fair. What he didn’t think was fair was the punishment she gave. 

“I’m grounded? ” He asked incredulously. “For how long?” 

Queen waved a dismissive hand. “Oh Don’t Worry, It’s Just For One (1) Month In Total,” she replied, swirling a glass of battery acid. Which was weird, because last he’d checked, Swatch had banned her from having battery acid in Sweet’s presence (or in Tasque Manager’s presence; she got iffy about alcohol). 

But he didn’t focus on that. “But why? I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but I kinda thought you’d know already. Since, y’know, I’m always at the Cyber Fields these days,” he huffed, muttering the last part before continuing at a normal volume. “Isn’t a whole month kind of excessive?” 

“No, Because I Actually Wanted You Here For Something Today,” she said, crossing her arms. Her smile didn’t quite drop, but something about it seemed more… stern, than normal. 

He perked up a little bit at the sentence, though. She rarely ever wanted him for things anymore, so hearing that she actually needed his presence today was… comforting, in a way. “Really? Why’d you need me?” 

She sniffed, which was weird because she didn’t have a nose. “The Knight Was Here Today,” she responded, a weird undertone in her voice. “They Wanted To Talk With The Two Of Us About Something: Important. And To Actually Meet You Or Whatever.” She did frown then, looking down at him. “I’m Very Disappointed In You, Sweet.” 

Usually, hearing that Queen was disappointed in him would make him wince. It’d make him feel guilty for whatever he’d done that was wrong, or whatever he’d done to upset her. He’d apologize, and then she’d send him off to his room for an hour or so to ‘Marinate Like Spaghetti Sauce’. 

But things were different, this time. 

He stared at the ground, and instead of wincing, he clenched his fists. Instead of feeling guilty, he felt angry. The first time she’d actually ‘wanted’ to spend time with him in nearly six months, and it was only because of the stupid Knight? And she was grounding him over it, even though the Knight was at the mansion practically every other day? And she’d had plenty of opportunities to introduce the two of them, but the only time it’d ever crossed her mind was when the Knight themself mentioned it? She didn’t even care enough about him to introduce him to the Lightner that gave them meaning on her own?

Sweet knew that he was supposed to love Lightners. That Lightners were what gave every single Darkner a purpose. But in that moment, he didn’t think there was anyone he hated more than the Lightner who’d stolen all of his mom’s Queen’s attention and care. 

He almost hated her for letting them. 

“Are you kidding me?!” he blurted. “You only wanted me here because of the Knight!? You’re only grounding me because of the Knight!? You only noticed I was even gone because of the stupid , STUPID KNIGHT!?”

The yell that came from his speakers was so loud that the paintings on the walls shook. The nearby tasques shrieked and ran away from the sound. The maice that had once again infested the palace since the Knight’s arrival skittered away from the noise. Queen’s visor went entirely blank, and yet Sweet couldn’t bring himself to care over the anger he felt at it all; at Queen, at the Knight, at the whole palace, at the entire city. 

“ You haven’t talked to me in person in weeks! I barely ever see you or Swatch or Tasque Manager anymore! I rarely ever even get to see the Swatchlings! I spend more time at the Cyber Fields than I do at the mansion! Sometimes I have to spend the night in the Fields because you forget to pick me up! You forget to even send someone! And it’s all because of the Knight! It’s because of the STUPID F##KING- ”

“Sweet,” Queen interrupted in a low tone, halting his rant. Instantly, all of the rage and aggression he’d been feeling bled out of his circuits, quickly replaced by an icy fear. “Go To Your Room.” 

Sweet stammered, suddenly frozen in place. “I-I... I-I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean-”

“I Wasn’t Asking, Sweet,” Queen said, voice colder than he felt. “Go To Your Room. Now.” 

Sweet didn’t have to be told twice, tripping on his own feet as he ran out of the room. 

— — — 

Oil dripped from his eye, dropping into his second speaker, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to care as his body, curled up on his bed, shook with sobs. He couldn’t believe he’d said all of that. He couldn’t believe he’d actually sworn at her. He couldn’t believe he’d yelled so loudly at her. He hadn’t even realized that he was so upset about everything, but the more he thought about it, the more it hurt. 

She hadn’t even refuted anything he said. She had watched with a stone-cold face as he listed out all the ways she (and the Knight) had hurt him, and then she’d dismissed him to his room. Maybe that meant she already knew how much it affected him, and she just didn’t care. The thought made him sob harder. 

A knock on the door sounded out, and that was the only warning he got before the door clicked open. He froze as he heard the sound of heels on the metal floors, thinking it was Queen, but the purrs that accompanied the steps gave away that it was Tasque Manager. 

He sat up and hurriedly wiped the oil out of his eye, knowing how much she hated disorder and uncleanliness. She didn’t seem to mind this time though, as she sat next to him on the bed despite the fact that the bed was unmade. He slept in it so little that there was hardly ever a reason to fix it. 

“I heard your fight with Queen,” Tasque Manager said gently. “Well, everybody heard it; your speakers got quite loud.” 

Sweet winced, his systems heating up in embarrassment. “I didn’t mean to yell so loud…” he mumbled, crossing his arms over his legs. 

“But you did mean what you said.”

Sweet hesitated, but nodded. 

“That’s fair,” Tasque responded, “and Queen is sorry that you’ve been feeling that way. We all are. However, there’s a lot at play that you don’t know.” 

Sweet looked up, curious. 

Tasque Manager sighed. “The Knight, although we dare not speak ill of them,” she gave him a pointed look, to which he cringed, “has been keeping everyone very busy as of late. They’ve been filling Queen in on many matters; both the issues of the Dark World, and of the Light World. Many such matters have required a large amount of listening ears. However, the matters discussed are quite heavy, and not so… children-friendly. Queen has been sending you to the Cyber Fields to shield you from our... honestly bleak future, but the Knight insisted that it was time for you to know today. When we couldn’t find you, the Knight was… displeased. They have since been delayed for quite a few months.” 

“Oh,” Sweet muttered, now feeling pretty guilty. So Queen did have a good reason to be upset at him; he’d practically driven the Knight away by… not showing up? I’m 

“That isn’t all, though,” Tasque Manager continued, cutting off his train of thought. “We…” She sighed, and then she looked at him sadly. “We really are sorry that you’ve been feeling this way, and that we haven’t done much to help. But…” she sighed again. “When we couldn’t find you today, Queen was genuinely… distraught, to say the absolute least. We were all worried, of course, but Queenie was nearly frantic in our search for you; in fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so panicked. Or heard her worry so much for someone else’s safety.” She laughed at what was apparently supposed to be a joke, but it quickly tapered off, and she coughed before continuing. “I must say, she showed a remarkable amount of self-control while your friends were present. And even more so after you yelled at her.” 

Sweet winced, now feeling ten times worse than before. She really did care, she really had been worried about him, and what had he done? He’d gone and shouted at her so loudly that the entire mansion could hear, and he’d been so wrong about everything. He was so stupid. 

“I don’t blame you for lashing out,” Tasque Manager spoke, apparently having sensed his line of thought. “It’s clear now that you were dealing with a lot of pent-up emotions, and we failed to notice when we should have. For that, we are truly sorry.” She paused for a moment, and then added: “Queen doesn’t blame you either.” 

At that, Sweet looked up, a spark of hope in his chest. “Promise?” His voice felt small; it almost reminded him of his first days here. 

Tasque Manager smiled at him comfortingly. “I promise.” She stood, smoothing out her dress. “Queen has requested that you stay in your room for the time being, to give you time to rest up before dinner.” 

Sweet nodded, honestly grateful that he didn’t have to see Queen again so soon after fighting; he didn’t know if he could take the shame. A thought occurred to him as Tasque Manager walked to the door, and he hesitated before calling out her name. “Hey, Tass?”

She paused in the doorway, turning back to him. “Yes?” 

“Can you ask Queen if she can send a Swatchling to the Cyber Fields? To let my friends know I’m grounded.” 

She smiled. “Of course. I’ll see what I can do.” With that, she shut the door, leaving him to get some rest. 

— — — 

Dinner that evening was… extremely awkward. For one, it was the first dinner he’d eaten at the mansion in… well, at least a month. Secondly, for the first time in even longer, everyone was actually at the table; Sweet, Swatch, Tasque Manager, the Swatchlings… even the Tasques got to eat in the same room. 

And, of course, and most importantly, Queen. 

No one spoke for the first fifteen minutes of the dinner. Although the dinner itself was pretty good, with heaping servings of Spaghetti Code being the main dish, premium Butler Juice (or ‘Butt’ juice, as Sweet and Queen used to snicker to themselves) being the beverage, and CD Bagels for dessert (Sweet couldn’t help but compare them to K_K’s. He really liked those bagels), but the tension was so thick that Sweet found it hard to enjoy the dinner in front of him. Apparently, everyone else did too. 

The first time any of them spoke to each other, it was Tasque Manager asking Swatch about how business at the Color Cafe was going; apparently, the Knight was taking up everyone’s personal time. 

Things were a little smoother sailing after that. Sweet still didn’t talk much, but then Swatch asked him about Cap’n and K_K, and suddenly he was talking about everything he’d been doing with them over the last year; having finally finished the junk shop, selling CD Bagels with Cap’n and K_K, starting their band… there was some stuff he didn’t tell them though, like the fact that they’d both run away from an orphanage, or the fact that none of them ever had anything good to say about the Knight; he stuck to the smaller details, like how K_K was really good at baking and cooking, and how Cap’n was super bad at flirting. 

That was when Queen had joined that particular conversation, attesting to Cap’n’s terrible pick-up lines. It was a really stilted conversation at first, but after half an hour, everyone was talking and laughing with each other, just like old times. 

Just like the times before the Knight came

He cut off that particular train of thought. 

He even managed to confirm with Queen that she’d send a Swatchling to the Cyber Fields, and after they’d all finished dinner, she took him down to the acid pool to ‘Just Hang Out’, while the others took care of dinner. He was still too young to go in the acid pool, so he just watched her float around on a donut tube as he swung his feet over the acid. 

They talked for hours, just catching up. She told him about all the trouble she’d gotten into, he told her about how he’d made his own turntable that could fly. She suggested that he get into building as a side job, with how good he was at it, and he said he’d think about it. 

It was during a lapse of silence that he remembered a question Cap’n had asked him once; one that he’d asked Queen multiple times. He hadn’t bothered to ask since he was ten, but he was feeling… curious, maybe, and wondered if it was worth the risk of losing time with her just to see if he could get an answer. 

He hesitated for a while, but eventually, he blurted, “Queen, are you my mom?” 

She froze, in the same way she had back when he first asked, and he quickly backtracked. “Sorry, that was a dumb question, I shouldn’t have asked, I’m really-“

“I’m Your Legal Guardian,” she answered, cutting Sweet off in the middle of his rant. “But I Suppose If You Want To Call Me: Mom, Then You May.” 

Sweet blinked several times, moving to speak several times, only to stop himself. “Oh,” was what he ended up saying. 

They didn’t talk about it again after that. 

— — —

The rest of the month that he was grounded went by much the same. He was still extremely bored by being stuck in the mansion all day, but at the same time, it was nice to have things back to… mostly normal. He was able to hang out with Swatch in the Color Cafe, he helped fix paintings with Tasque Manager, he played Minecrap with Queen, he played games with the Swatchlings… he even got them to tell him about that one closed-off guest room, previously having belonged to someone named Spamton G. Spamton. They didn’t tell him much about it, but from what he did hear, he was glad they didn’t tell him more. 

They still wouldn’t acknowledge the basement, though. Bummer. 

Despite all of this, he still found himself missing Cap’n and K_K. He missed hanging out in the shop, he missed playing music with them, he missed selling CD Bagels, he missed eating K_K’s CD Bagels, he missed bantering with Cap’n, he missed having sleepovers… he even missed performing for the one singular Plugboy who bothered to listen out in the Cyber Fields. 

That was why, the second he was un-grounded, the first thing he asked to do was visit Cap’n and K_K. Queen agreed, sending a Swatchling to go with him, and he was practically bouncing the entire way there. 

He spotted them selling CD Bagels at their boxes, and his soul lifted. “Hey, hey guys!” he yelled, jumping and waving. 

The both of them paused, turning to stare at him. After a moment, Cap’n scoffed and turned back to the customers, while K_K gave him an uncharacteristically small smile before doing the same. 

Sweet blinked, confused by their reaction, but figured they were probably just too busy serving customers to talk at the moment, so he sat down to wait. 

He didn’t have to wait too long, because the lines were pretty short, so as soon as the last Plugboys was out of view (with no other Plugboys arriving), Sweet hopped up and bounded over to them. He stopped right in front of their boxes, soul once again lifting in delight. 

“Hi guys!” He chirped with a wave. K_K gave a small wave back, but Cap’n scowled at him. 

“What do you want,” he muttered, harshly shoving leftover CD Bagels into the box. 

Sweet blinked rapidly, taken aback by Cap’n’s aggressive attitude. “Wha- what do you mean, what do I want?” He asked incredulously. “I was just saying hi.” He looked at K_K. “Man, it’s been so long since I’ve seen you guys, I-”

“And who’s fault is that?” Cap’n snapped, closing his box so hard it was nearly crushed in his grip. K_K followed suit, but handled his box with much more care. “What, did you come back to rub it in?” 

Sweet blinked once more, now thoroughly confused and feeling a terrible sinking feeling in his circuits. “Rub what in?” He asked, bringing his hands up to grab his arms. “I-“

“Oh, nothin’,” Cap’n cut him off sarcastically, “Why don’t we all just pretend that you don’t think you’re better than us, huh? That everything’s just fine and dandy, that you didn’t just totally ditch us once you remembered how nice it was to live with Queen?” He threw his hands up in the air, a sardonic grin on his face. “That sounds like so much fun!”

“What are you even talking about?!” Sweet exploded, throwing his own arms up in the air in genuine confusion- and now a little anger, too. “What do you even mean?”

“He means because you don’t want to be friends anymore,” K_K said quietly. 

Sweet froze, a horrible feeling settling over him like the crash of a wave. “Huh- what? ” He sputtered. “Why- why would you think I didn’t wanna be friends anymore??” 

“Why wouldn’t we think that?!” Cap’n yelled, kicking his box of CD Bagels. “You go totally radio silent for almost a whole month, and then when we finally get ahold of one of those ‘Swatchlings’,” he put his fingers up in mock quotation, “the guy says that they’ve never heard of ‘mAStEr SWeEt’ having any friends! Especially not from the ‘Cyber Fields’! They didn’t even know our names!” He yanked the sunglasses off, his glare now on full display. “So yeah, it’s pretty f##king obvious just how much you care about us!’ 

Sweet- didn’t know how to respond to that. His whole body felt cold, like someone had just dumped an entire gallon-sized bucket of ice water on top of him. It almost even felt like he was about to start glitching out in the same way that getting water in his circuits would do to him. “I-I- that’s- that’s not-“ 

“Whatever,” Cap’n scoffed, muttering under his breath. “It must’ve been real nice to go home and remember that your wittle ‘mommy’ cared about you.” 

And just like that, the ice turned to fire. He had no idea what was going on. He had no idea why they thought he didn’t care about them. But Cap’n just insulted Queen. He’d just insulted the one person Sweet was actually sure cared about him anymore. 

He didn’t think about what he said before he said it. He just knew he wanted it to hurt. 

“At least I actually have a mom, #sshole.” 

Sweet slapped a hand over his speaker. Cap’n froze. K_K dropped his box. 

The heat of his anger melted away, only to be frozen solid. He couldn’t even say it felt like ice; it was so, so much colder than that. Every circuit froze up, every system stopped responding, each of his speakers went dead silent, and even his mind felt like it’d been frozen in place. 

It was so, so cold. 

Cap’n abruptly picked up the box again. Sweet struggled to find his voice. “Cap-“ 

Cap’n didn’t stop, whirling around. Sweet practically begged. “Cap- Cap, wait, I-I’m- I’m so-”

“Go f##k yourself, Sweet,” Cap’n deadpanned, not even bothering to turn back. “Clearly, she never should have named you that in the first place.” He marched off into the distance until Sweet was staring despairingly at nothing. 

After a few moments of silence, K_K bent down to pick up his own box. Sweet looked at him, pleading. “K_K, I’m- I’m so, so sorry, I didn’t mean it, I swear I didn’t mean it, I’m so sorry-”

K_K stood at his full height, Sweet’s voice catching in his circuits. K_K wasn’t smiling, but he didn’t look angry. He looked profoundly sad. Quietly, he said, “I think you should go home, Sweet. Cool off.” With that, he turned and followed after Cap’n, only glancing back at Sweet once before he too disappeared from Sweet’s sight. 

Sweet didn’t know how to tell him that he was already freezing. 

— — —

His trip home felt like it took eons. The Swatchling sent to accompany him barely spoke the entire time, leaving Sweet to swim around in the icy water of his thoughts. He might as well actually be frozen in ice; with how slowly he moved and the way his hands trembled, he didn’t think he’d be able to tell if he suddenly was. 

No one was there to greet him when he arrived through the front door. He couldn’t bring himself to feel angry about it, or upset, or even resigned. He just felt cold. 

He didn’t bother trying to make it to his room; he knew if he did, he’d just end up collapsing on the floor to sob. Instead, he made his way to the Color Cafe and dragged himself into one of the plush chairs inside. Swatch wasn’t there. 

No one was in there, he realized belatedly, and he vaguely wondered where they all went. He couldn’t bring himself to get up and find out. 

Hours passed in the cafe, or maybe it was just minutes; at the moment, Sweet couldn’t tell the difference. Nevertheless, after some amount of time, he started hearing voices fill the mansion’s lobby. Swatchlings started filing in, not even seeming to notice his presence, and not even five minutes later, Swatch himself walked in, pausing next to Sweet’s chair. 

“Oh, hello young Master,” he greeted. “How was your day?” 

“Where was everyone?” Sweet mumbled in lieu of an answer. He didn’t bother trying to put genuine curiosity in his voice; he knew it wouldn’t come out any differently no matter how hard he tried. 

Swatch didn’t seem to notice Sweer’s numbness. “Ah, well, that’s the exciting part,” he replied, feathers fluffing as he smiled, “The Knight is coming back sooner than expected! In just two weeks, to be exact.”

“Oh.”

Sweet found himself even colder, somehow. 

— — —

He spent almost the entire first week holed up in his room. He had sobbed, once he’d gotten there, and since then he had barely stopped sobbing. It’d gotten to the point where he started vomiting oil instead of crying it, which was almost a better alternative to the constant tears. No one ever came to check on him except for the stray Swatchling every now and again, who would usually just come to leave food in the room. 

They never seemed to notice that he barely ate it. 

He tossed and turned every night, unable to sleep. Every time he closed his eye, his mind would replay the argument, repeating his words back st him over and over and over. Every time he left his eye open, he’d get colder and colder and colder. 

He left his room in the middle of the second week, practically in a haze. He ran into Queen, who barely gave him a greeting before rushing off. Before she could leave his sight, a question he hadn’t even realized he’d been thinking about fell out of his speaker:

“Did you ever send a Swatchling to let Cap’n and Cakes know I was grounded?” 

Queen paused, fully stopping in the hallway. After a minute, her visor switched to LMAO. “Oh No I Totally Forgot About That Lol.” She laughed, then walked away. 

That was when he broke. 

It was already late in the evening, but Sweet didn’t care. He didn’t care that it was dark already, he didn’t care that most people were sleeping by now, he didn’t care that it was definitely too late to ask Queen for permission, he didn’t care that he’d probably get grounded again. 

He left. 

He didn’t run, not at first. He walked through the mansion’s hallways, down into the lobby, and out of the palace doors. He passed multiple Swatchlings on the way out; none of them tried to stop him. 

As soon as the doors closed behind him, that was when he ran. 

He ran past the Addisons trying to sell him products he’d never use. He ran around the Virovriokuns spreading their viruses into the air. He ran faster than the Ambyu-lances on their way to fatally-wounded patients. He ran past the blue, he ran past the few lights still on, he ran into the dark, he ran through the dark. He ran all the way out of the city. 

He ran into the green of the Cyber Fields, into a darkness much more prevalent but much more soothing than that of the city’s. He ran past the houses of the sleeping Plugboys, past the few Virovirokuns that lived out here, past the unfinished roller coaster. He ran past the place the boxes used to be, he ran past the place the Hacker lived, he ran past the green, green, green.

He didn’t stop running until he reached the shop. Their shop. 

He froze in front of the door, ice running through his limbs yet again. He warred with himself, wanting to knock and being wholly afraid of the prospect at the same time. 

Just knock. 

I can’t.

You can. 

They hate me. 

Just knock. 

If I knock, they’ll just tell me to get lost. 

Just knock. 

They’ll throw me away, just like everyone else. 

Just knock. 

I can’t do it.

You can. 

I can’t knock. 

You have to. 

I can’t.

You can. 

I can’t knock. 

JUST KNOCK. 

His hand was rapping at the door before he’d even realized which side won. 

Immediately, he froze. He shouldn’t have knocked, he should have left, they’ll hate him, they’ll toss him out, he shouldn’t have knocked, why did he knock, why did he-

The door opened, and Sweet was equal parts relieved and horrified to see that it was K_K at the door. His breath caught in his circuits as the taller monster rubbed his eyes with a yawn before looking down, blinking when his eyes landed on Sweet. “Hello-?” 

“I’m sorry!” Sweet burst into tears, sobbing hysterically and clutching his arms tightly in his hands. “I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, I didn’t mean it but it was still so bad to say, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m such a terrible friend, I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry-!”

He was cut off suddenly by long arms wrapping around him. He flinched, but realized when K_K knelt down that it wasn’t to hit him or shove him away; it was a huh. 

“I forgive you,” K_K said. 

Sweet took a deep breath, before breaking into sobs once again. He wrapped his own arms around K_K, clutching him tightly as he sobbed oily tears into his chest. He cried and sobbed and screamed, and K_K didn’t let him go or throw him away; he knelt there, and when Sweer’s legs buckled and he collapsed into sobs on the ground, K_K fell with him, and Sweet sobbed into his shoulder. 

They’d been sitting that way for a while before Sweet heard a groan from inside the shop. K_K turned his head, and Sweet froze, oily tears still running down his face, as Cap’n stumbled into the doorway, looking worse for wear himself. 

“Who’s makin’ so much noise at-” he cut himself off as he noticed Sweet sitting there. He glared, before he paused and suddenly looked unsure. “Uh… what-”

“I’m so sorry,” Sweet blurted, hiding his face in K_K’s shoulder again. “I’m so sorry I said that to you, that was so horrible, I’m so sorry I said that, and I’m sorry I made you think I didn’t wanna be friends, and-“ 

“Woah, hey,” Cap’n cut him off, and Sweet chanced a glance at him, only to see Cap’n looking extremely uncomfortable. “I, uh… Man, I don’t know how I could just not forgive you, when you’re cryin’ like that…” 

Sweet shook his head vehemently. “Don’t forgive me,” he said, hiccuping on another sob, “don’t forgive me if it’s- if it’s just ‘cause you feel bad. You shouldn’t  forgive me, I’m a terrible friend, and I’m so, so sorry I messed up so bad-”

He was cut off (again) by Cap’n joining the hug, slouching against K_K and Sweet. “‘S too late for this,” he muttered, and Sweet thought that maybe he could hear tears in Cap’n’s voice as well, “we should go inside.”

“In a minute,” K_K replied, shifting his grip to hold both Cap’n and Sweet tightly. Neither of them tried to argue. 

— — —

A minute ended up turning into thirty, but none of them complained. Sweet was actually pretty sure that Cap’n complained more once K_K deemed them ready to go back inside, but those protests were also short-lived once the three of them crashed onto K_K’s bed (Sweet didn’t know they’d gotten beds) and almost immediately fell asleep, still curled up in a hug and holding each other tightly as consciousness faded away. 

That was how they woke up the next morning, all tangled around each other. Things were super awkward, especially between Sweet and Cap’n, but K_K just got up and made pancakes, chatting about random stuff he and Cap’n had done while Sweet was gone. 

Breakfast itself was quiet, even though none of them were actually eating. Cap’n was nudging the pancakes around on the plate, K_K was sitting with his hands folded while looking off to the side, and Sweet stared at his plate, unable to bring himself to so much as touch the food. 

“Sweet?” K_K spoke after several minutes of silence. “Are you okay?” 

Sweet hesitated, folding his hands under the table. “Why are you even asking me that?” he muttered, willing himself not to cry again. “You should hate me.” 

“Tough sh#t,” Cap’n deadpanned, coughing when K_K gave him a disapproving look. “‘Cause we don’t hate you,” he continued, “but we’re still pretty pi- ticked off that you ditched us for apparently no reason.” 

“He’s trying to ask you why you left without saying anything,” K_K explained. Cap’n opened his mouth with a sputter, but paused and then nodded with a sigh.

“I was trying to have a little more tact, but yeah.” 

“K_K was more tactful than you,” Sweet murmured as he twisted his hands together. He went quiet for a moment, hesitating. Most of him wanted to try to explain, but a small part of him whispered that they wouldn’t like what he had to say, that they’d say he didn’t try hard enough, that they’d kick him out if he said anything. It was almost enough to keep his speakers quiet. 

But they wouldn’t do that. He knew they wouldn’t. K_K had forgiven him just last night, before he’d explained anything at all. He should explain; he wanted to explain. 

So he did. 

He told them about how he’d been grounded, how Queen had promised to send someone to let them know, about everything that’d happened while he’d been gone— about how he missed them. They told him stuff too; like how they’d gotten concerned when he didn’t show up for a week, how they’d gone to Cyber City by themselves to look for him, how the Swatchling they met had said they’d never heard of Sweet having friends in the ‘Cyber Field’ (and this time, Sweet didn’t miss the negative undertone of the words), how they’d waited for him to come back and say it wasn’t true for a week before losing hope… Cap’n begrudgingly admitted that he’d ended up fully believing that Sweet didn’t care about them anymore, while K_K had still held out hope that it was all a misunderstanding. 

They all pointedly didn’t talk about the fight. That was fine with Sweet; he’d been forgiven and he didn’t want to think about it anymore. 

“So when’re you gonna go back?” Cap’n asked a while later, all three of them lounging on the couch and listening to a radio station playing electro swing. At Sweet’s flinch, he hurriedly added, “Not that we want you gone! But like, are you sure you’re not gonna get grounded again for this?” 

Sweet shrugged from where he laid against K_K’s left side, with Cap’n on K_K’s right. K_K had his arms wrapped around both of them; a gesture neither complained about. “Maybe, but I doubt it,” he replied. “She only got upset last time ‘cause I messed up things with the Knight.” He paused with a wince as he remembered what Tasque Manager had said about Queen being worried, but he was now more sure that it was more about the Knight than it was himself, so he continued. “Plus, I doubt she even realizes I’m gone.” 

Cap’n snorted. “Yeah right,” he said as he leaned back against K_K. “You only left in the middle of the night and still haven’t showed up by morning. She’s probably flipping right now.” 

Sweet stifled a snicker at the mental image (although Queen literally flipping out didn’t sound too out of character for her), but stared at the ground. “She’s only talked to me, like, once in the past whole week. She’ll probably only wonder where I am when the Knight comes.” 

“She hasn’t talked to you in a week?” K_K asked, tilting his head. “I thought she was your mom.” 

Sweet hesitated. He’d thought so too, but with everything that’d happened (why did the Swatchling pretend they weren’t his friends?) , he wasn’t sure anymore. “She… said I could call her mom, but I’m not sure she considers herself my mom.” He wrung his hands together. “But her not talking to me for a week is pretty normal, ever since the Knight showed up.”

“That sucks,” Cap’n hummed sympathetically, to which Sweet just shrugged. “Still though, she’s gotta have noticed that you’re not in the mansion at all anymore, right? Or someone’s probably noticed, at least.” 

“I doubt it,” Sweet replied, feeling bitter for a second before he squashed it down. “They don’t usually notice stuff like this; otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten away with nearly as many sleepovers.”

There was a pause. “I thought that was just the first time,” Cap’n said, something strange in his voice. 

“Yeah, didn’t they know about all the sleepovers?” K_K added. 

Sweet shrugged. “I mean, maybe they figured it out eventually,” he replied, “but most of the time it was just because they’d forgotten I was in the Cyber Field.” 

No one spoke for a few moments. Sweet looked up questioningly, only to freeze when he saw the concerned looks on his friend’s faces. A mix of unease and defensiveness washed over him, and he added, “Okay first of all, it was for the Knight, okay? I mean…” he hesitated. “I didn’t– I don’t like that they forget about me sometimes, or– or just ignore me in the hallway, but there’s a lot to do whenever the Knight arrives, so it makes sense that they’re busy.”

“Too busy to remember that you were gone? ” Cap’n asked incredulously. “Dude, that’s like– seriously messed up. They shouldn’t just forget that you existed!” 

“I think that classifies as child neglect,” K_K added, no less incredulous than Cap’n. 

Sweet scowled, part of him wanting to defend Queen and everyone even as another part of him quietly wanted to agree. “But it’s for the Knight,” he argued, and then before he could think about it, “And it’s not like the orphanage treated you better; they treated you worse .” His brain short-circuited, and he froze as he realized what he said. “I– I’m sorry,” he stammered, pulling his legs up to his chest, “that was unfair of me.” 

There was silence for a few moments before K_K spoke. “It was, but it’s okay.” He paused, then amended, “Well, no, it’s not okay, but I forgive you.” 

Cap’n sighed, and the tension Sweet hadn’t noticed before bled out of his shoulders. “Yeah, me too,” he muttered. 

That was the second time they’d forgiven him, in less than twenty-four hours. 

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, oily tears welling up in his eye. “I’m sorry I’m such a bad friend. I really don’t deserve you guys, or Queen, or Tasque Manager, or Swatch, or anyone–”

K_K pulled him closer, wrapping his arm around him tighter. “Don’t say that about yourself,” he said quietly. “It’s not true.” 

Sweet sniffed, willing the tears to not fall from his speaker. They really were too nice for him. “Yes it is,” he muttered, wiping at his eye. “I keep being awful to you and Cap, I yelled and swore at Queen, I’m being ungrateful towards everyone in the mansion, and I can’t even get it through my big, stupid head that the Knight is ten times more important than I’ll ever be.” 

“Shut the f##k up,” Cap’n growled, startling Sweet. K_K hugged him tighter while giving Cap’n yet another disappointed look. Cap’n ignored it as he continued, “First of all, you swearing at Queen is bad#ss. Second of all, f##k the people in the mansion! Sure, they took you in when you were younger, but that doesn’t change the fact that now , they’re treating you like sh#t. Third of all, and most importantly,” Cap’n paused to clamber over K_K (who noticeably said nothing about the multiple swears) and practically threw himself on top of Sweet, who let out an ‘oomph’ at the impact. “I don’t care about some dumb fancy-pants Knight. Maybe Queen and her cronies don’t think you’re important compared to the Knight, but I don’t care. You’re important to me. You’re important to K_K. Don’t you dare say otherwise ever again.” He hugged Sweet tight, although Sweet had the feeling that that wasn’t the reason he suddenly found it hard to breathe. 

“What he said,” K_K added, hugging the two of them tightly. “You’re important to us. You’re both important to me. I don’t care what you do or say; there’s nothing you can do that’ll make me stop caring about you, and there’s nothing you can do that’ll make you unworthy of love.” 

Sweet’s resolve to not cry crumbled, and as the three of them sat there in a group hug, he could’ve sworn he felt tears from the other two fall onto him as well. 

Sweet knew by now that it was possible to have two homes, but he thought it’d be okay if he just had this one. 

— — —

He still went back to the mansion the next day, despite Cap’n and K_K’s reservations. He explained to them that one, he still lived in the mansion, and two, he was legally Queen’s… ward? Ward or child. Still, this meant that she was still in charge of him, and he really didn’t want to get grounded again. They eventually agreed, but only after they made him promise to come back the next day, and said that if they didn’t hear from him in a week, they’d go to Queen’s mansion and break him out themselves, whether he wanted it or not. 

He didn’t mind that in the slightest. 

Cap’nhad shuffled awkwardly from foot to foot as he’d been getting ready, rubbing the back of his head while K_K stood nearby. “Hey, uh…. I’m sorry for assuming the worst after you got grounded,” he’d apologized. “And for swearing at you so much yesterday. Even if you kinda deserved that last part.” 

Sweet had paused. “Oh, uh. I forgive you?” He’d already forgiven him, to be honest, but he was also so used to being the one apologizing that hearing someone else say it was uncanny. 

“I’m sorry too,” K_K had added. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, K_K.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t notice you were hurting when I should have, and for not taking action to help you.” 

Sweet’s breath had caught in his throat. Despite the fact that K_K shouldn’t be taking any responsibility for that, it still felt nice to hear. It was reminiscent of Tasque Manager’s apology, but it felt…. different, somehow. 

“That wasn’t your fault, K_K. But if it helps you feel better, I forgive you.” 

They’d all hugged goodbye, taking an unusually long amount of time due to them not really wanting to be separated, but eventually they’d let go, and Sweet headed back to the mansion alone. He tried not to miss Cap’n and K_K the whole way there. 

Although once he got to the mansion, missing his brothers? friends? friends was somehow both the last thing on his mind and at the forefront of it. 

The palace was in disarray, with Swatchling’s running amok and carrying different materials. Tasques prowled around the place as though they were going to pounce at any moment, and the maice that had been so bold before now skittered back to their hiding spaces in the walls. He was pretty sure he heard Tasque Manager in the Color Cafe and Swatch yelling frenzied commands at the Swatchlings. 

The only person who seemed unaffected by the chaos was Queen, who stood at the bottom of the steps, surveying the lobby as she drank a glass of battery acid. 

No one spoke to or acknowledged Sweet in any way as he ducked and dodged through the traffic, trying to make it to Queen to figure out what the heck was going on. They didn’t even seem to notice him when he accidentally tripped one of them up, just stepping around him like he wasn’t even there. 

Once he made it over to Queen, he hesitated. What if she had noticed he was gone and got angry at him? 

Still, he was already right there, so it’d be kinda hard to sneak away now. So instead, he cleared his throat and asked, “Queen, what’s going on?” 

She didn’t respond for a few moments, and only seemed to notice him when he repeated the question. She looked down at him with the biggest smile he’d seen on her, and yet nothing about it looked genuine. “Oh Lol Hey Sweetie Pie, You Just Missed The Knight.” She took a sip from her battery acid. 

Sweet froze. “The— The Knight? But I thought they wouldn’t be here for a few more days.” 

Queen shrugged. “They Got Here: Early.” She took another sip from her battery acid and didn’t say anything for a few moments. Just as Sweet considered walking away, she added, “Oh Wait Sweet There’s Something I Have To Tell You.” 

He paused, a feeling of apprehension coming over him. “...yeah?” 

“I’m Going To Ban All Music Lol. Except Noise Music And Reverse Diss Tracks.” 

“...What?” 

“I’m Going To Ban All Music Lol. Except Noise Music And Reverse Diss Tracks,” she repeated, downing the last of her battery acid. Then she suddenly threw it on the ground, glass shattering with a loud crash. Sweet flinched away from the shards that went flying, but the Swatchlings didn’t even seem to notice what had happened; instead, they just stepped on and over the shards of glass, not a care for the mess or potential injury while they had other tasks to do. 

“The Knight Said I Should Ban Like; All All Music, But I Decided I Still Wanted To Listen To Music I Like, So I Only Banned: Most Of It.” She laughed like it was the funniest joke she’d ever told. 

Which was what this all had to be; a joke. There was no way she was actually doing that; why would the Knight even say something like that? “You can’t be serious,” he said slowly, waiting for her to come out and say that it was a joke. 

Instead, her visor shifted to ???. “Why Would I Not Be Lmao.” 

Sweet blinked. Then blinked again. Then blinked some more. “You— you can’t just ban all music!”

“Most Music,” she corrected, “And Actually I Literally Can Lol.” 

“I’m literally in a band!” 

“Will You Only Play Noise Music Or Reverse Diss Tracks?” 

Sweet sputtered. What even was a reverse diss track? “No??” 

“Then You Can’t Be In A Band,” she stated simply. 

Sweet froze. He couldn’t be— but he had to. They were a trio; Sweet Cap’n Cakes. He couldn’t just not be in the band. And he was literally a speaker; playing music was his whole purpose. “What if I just play other music anyway?” 

She tilted her head. “I Would Have To: Ground You.” 

“Over playing music in a band?”  

“Yes.” 

Sweet gaped. This was genuinely the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. “Well— I’m gonna do it anyway!” he blurted after a second. “I’m gonna go be in the band, and I’m gonna play whatever songs I want, and you can’t stop me!” 

Queen laughed. “I Literally Can Lol.” 

“No you can’t-!” 

— — —

Turned out she very much could. All she had to do was order a Swatchling to bring him to his room and tell him he was ‘indefinitely grounded’. 

He’d tried to get out as soon as the Swatchling had left the room, but the door was somehow locked from the other side. Had she switched the locks while he was gone? Or did this happen while he was grounded the last time? 

He tried to kick the door open, but it wouldn’t budge. He tried to get the doorknob off, but it didn’t move. He even looked around his room that could get him out through his second-story window, but all he could find were two different outfits that were definitely not going to be enough. 

After he tried (and failed) to escape for thirty minutes straight, he sat down on his bed, head in his hands as he thought. He couldn’t get out of the room right now ; anything that might have helped him escape before, he’d taken to the junk shop at some point and hadn’t brought it back. The room was nearly bare of any personal belongings by this point. 

Except for one thing.

Sweet’s gaze slid over to his dresser. The toy robot, the one Queen had found him fixing all those years ago, stood there, untouched. He hadn’t used it since he was at least twelve; he’d thought he’d outgrown playing with toys.

Now he might not get to use it ever again. 

He tore his eye away from the robot, looking back at the door. He couldn’t escape right now, but maybe when the Swatchlings came back to feed him (they would, right? They wouldn’t just forget he was there) , he could slip past them and get out. 

— — — 

The first time a Swatchling came to bring him a meal (which was dinner, supposedly), he didn’t try to escape; instead, he ate the meal and went to bed, so that when he did try to escape, he’d have the energy to do it.

It was hard to fall asleep, though. He stayed awake for hours before he managed to doze off. 

At breakfast time, he’d tried to dash out of the room while the Swatchling was putting the meal on the dresser, but he’d been quickly grabbed and deposited on his bed before the door had been locked again. He’d tried to hide behind the door and slip out at lunch, but an additional Swatchling had caught him and brought him back in his room. He tried to hide under the bed to confuse the Swatchlings at dinner, but all they did was leave the food there and lock him in the room again. 

The next day passed much the same way, although he did get close once at lunch when he set up a contraption to drop his other two outfits on the Swatchlings to distract them while he ran. Unfortunately, he’d been caught and brought back by Swatch himself, and when dinner came around, three Swatchlings had been added to the first two, making escape practically impossible. 

He’d been pacing in his room for the past hour when he heard a knock on his window. 

He swung his head around, only to freeze when he saw Cap’n��s face staring back at him. His soul lifted as he rushed over to the window, and he yanked it open. “Cap! How’re you even-?”

“Shhhh!” Cap’n shushed harshly. “There’s tasques prowling around everywhere; me ‘nd K_K barely got in!” A quick glance down revealed that K_K had extended his upper body all the way up to the window, with Cap’n sitting on his shoulders. 

“Sorry,” Sweet whispered, then paused. How did they even know he was grounded? He remembered now that they’d said they would break him out if he didn’t show up for a week, but it’s only been two days, so… “How did you guys know to come get me?” 

Cap’n huffed. “Just get out here! We’ll explain later when we’re not at risk of gettin’ our butts beat by Queen!” 

Sweet nodded and began to climb out the window, then paused. “Give me a sec, I’ve gotta get something,” he whispered, then tumbled back into the room, ignoring Cap’n’s exaggerated groan. He grabbed the toy robot from the dresser, never to be left behind again. He ran back up to the window and climbed onto the sill. “Okay, I’m ready.” 

“Finally!” Cap’n whisper-shouted, then held his arms up. “Okay, I’m gonna grab you, and then K_K’s gonna slowly bring us all down.” Sweet looked at Cap’n dubiously. “Are you even strong enough for that?”

“Shut up and get out here, Sweet.” 

Sweet nodded, slowly lowering himself out the window, and to his credit, Cap’n did manage to grab and hold him, even if Sweet felt his grip slipping every other second. 

“I didn’t know you could extend your limbs that far, K_K,” Sweet whispered as K_K slowly started to lower the three of them to the ground. 

“Neither did I!” K_K whispered with a grin. “We were gonna kidnap a Swatchling if this didn’t work!” 

Sweet blinked. “Wait, you were gonna what-?” 

He cut himself off with a yelp as Cap’n suddenly let go, only to be caught by one of K_K’s arms. He scowled as he jumped out of K_K’s arm, just as Cap’n jumped off of his shoulders. “What was that for?” he whispered. 

Cap’n breathed deeply, leaning over with his hands on his knees. “Sorry,” he wheezed, “I didn’t realize how heavy you are.”

Sweet narrowed his eye. “I’m not that heavy.” 

“Yeah, he’s not that heavy,” K_K added. 

“Just shut up,” Cap’n groaned, standing up straight. “We’ve gotta get out of here.” 

That, all three of them could agree on. 

— — — 

The three of them collapsed on the couch nearly the second they made it back, the adrenaline from sneaking in and out of Queen’s mansion bleeding out of their systems. The only thing Sweet had done before letting himself sit down was check to make sure his turntable was still in the junk shop’s back room– which it was. After that, there was nothing to stop the three of them from sinking to a heap on the couch. 

As Cap’n mumbled at K_K and tried to shove him off, with K_K refusing to let go of Cap’n or Sweet, Sweet just sighed, sinking into the couch with relief. 

“So how’d you guys know to come and get me?” Sweet mumbled, causing Cap’n and K_K to pause. “It hasn’t been even close to a week yet.” Cap’n shrugged, struggling to sit up with K_K holding him so tightly. “We got the announcement that Queen was banning music this morning,” he explained, giving up on trying to escape K_K’s grasp and flopping back down against the couch. “We already knew that you weren’t gonna take it well and that Queen fu- freaking sucks, so we just decided to go early.” 

“Oh,” was Sweet’s reply, and he gripped K_K’s arm almost as tightly as K_K was holding him. “...thank you.” 

Cap’n just hummed with a nod, leaning back against K_K. Everything went quiet for a moment, before Cap’n spoke up again. “So what’re we gonna do now? Can’t exactly be a band if we can’t play any music.” 

“Unless we only ever play noise music,” K_K pointed out. All three of them shuddered at the thought. 

Sweet stared at the ground, thinking hard. Cap’n was right; all of the music they’d written was banned. They literally couldn’t play any of their songs anywhere unless they wanted to get in serious trouble. 

But he found that he didn’t really care so much. Playing music with Cap’n and K_K was the happiest he’d ever been, and he’d loved music even before Queen took him in. Abandoning music would practically be abandoning himself; and it almost felt like abandoning Cap’n and K_K too, even if it was only their band. And again, he was literally a speaker; the words ‘never play music’ in that specific order weren’t in his vocabulary. 

Besides, he would probably already be in trouble for breaking out of the mansion while grounded anyway. 

He stood up suddenly, K_K’s grip having loosened during the silence. The two of them exchanged a look, but he ignored it as he looked for an RCA connector cable. “Sweet? What’re you doing?” Cap’n asked, sitting up. 

“I’m gonna go play music,” Sweet said firmly, finding the cable he was looking for. 

“What?” Cap’n and K_K yelled at the same time. Cap’n jumped off the couch, K_K not far behind. “I don’t know how you already forgot, but we were literally just talking about the fact that we can’t play music anymore,” Cap’n added. 

“I don’t care,” Sweet snapped as he stalked off to the back room and walked up to its door. “I’m getting my turntable and I’m playing music as loud as I can from my speakers.” 

“You’re going to get in trouble,” K_K warned, grabbing the doorknob before Sweet could reach for it.

Sweet rolled his eye. “I’m already gonna be in trouble, K_K,” he replied, glancing between him and Cap’n, who crossed his arms.

“You’re gonna get in more trouble,” Cap’n amended. “And we just busted you out of Queen’s mansion. Do you really wanna go back and get to find out what the dungeons there feel like?” 

“Queen’s mansion doesn’t have a dungeon,” Sweet muttered, but shook his head. “But that’s not the point. I need to play music; I’m literally a speaker .” He pointed at Cap’n. “And aren’t you a cassette player?” He pointed at K_K. “And you’re a CD player. You guys need to play music even more than I do.” 

Both Cap’n and K_K hesitated at that. “We can handle going on nothin’ but noise music,” Cap’n replied, but it sounded unsure. 

“For how long?” Sweet asked, crossing his own arms. “How long are you gonna be okay with playing nothing besides noise music or a ‘reverse diss track’? We don’t even have many noise music songs; how long are you gonna be able to play the same four songs on repeat, for the rest of your lives?” 

K_K and Cap’n shared a wary glance. “It’s better than getting in trouble, though,” K_K said hesitantly. “She might not have a dungeon, but I don’t want to know what she’ll do to enforce that law.” 

“The law we’re not even gonna be able to follow?” Sweet asked incredulously. “Can both of you honestly say that you’re gonna be able to go for the rest of our lives playing nothing but noise music? Playing nothing but the same four songs over and over?” 

Neither of them said anything for a moment, seemingly wanting to look anywhere except at Sweet. After a minute, K_K spoke, “Sweet, is this because of the music, or does it have something to do with Queen herself?” 

Sweet frozen. He hadn’t quite considered that, but it was a real possibility. He did feel bitter towards Queen; he felt bitter towards everyone in the mansion. Maybe even everyone in the city. Maybe this was all an attempt to get back at Queen, for everything she’d done to him. 

But everything she’d done to him included taking him in when he had no one. 

And it wasn’t just about her, either. It was about the fact that he was made to play music. It was about the fact that Cap’n and K_K were made to play music. Music was a part of them, even more than it was for him. He could handle playing a myriad of different things from his speakers, even if none of them made him want to dance the way music did, but Cap’n and K_K would have practically nothing. 

“I think it might a little,” Sweet said slowly, “but it’s also about the three of us. We’re the Sweet Cap’n Cakes; playing music is what we do . And it’d be that way even if we weren’t a band.” He tapped his foot on the ground. “And it’s not just about music either. If Queen’s gonna decide to be as petty as to ban something like music she doesn’t particularly enjoy, what’s to stop her from banning other things too? Like- like staying out too late, or being able to sell CD Bagels, or crossing the road without a permit, or–” 

“‘Crossing the road without a permit’?” Cap’n deadpanned. “And being able to sell CD Bagels? That’s taking it a little too far.” “And banning music isn’t?” Sweet retorted, Cap’n quickly shutting up. “You think it’s crazy, and that’s because it is crazy, but we also think that banning music is crazy, and what’d she do? She banned music! She banned music when some of her own subjects were literally made for making music! She’s already taken things ‘a little too far’. What’s to stop her from going further? Are we really supposed to just lie down and take that?” 

Neither of them answered him for a moment, just glancing at each other again. After a minute, Cap’n sighed. “So what, you’re in your rebel phase or somethin’?” 

Sweet sputtered. “It’s not a phase!” he snapped, before pausing as Cap’n snickered and K_K grinned. “No, no do not laugh at me that is not what I meant–” he paused again. “But, well… kinda.” 

“So you’re having a phase?” K_K asked. 

Sweet groaned, shaking his head. “No, it’s– not about the phase part, I meant the ‘rebel’ part.” He put his hand on the doorknob that K_K had stopped paying attention to, pushing the door open. “Queen’s banned music, and if she can get away with that, what else can she get away with? So we should show her that she can’t get away with it, that we’re not just gonna let this happen. So- so let’s be rebels! Let’s be a resistance against Queen’s stupid laws!” He gestured at the turntable. 

…

“That was so overdramatic,” Cap’n deadpanned, but then grinned as Sweet sputtered. “But I get what you’re saying; and to be honest, I don’t really like the thought of playing noise music for eternity.” He popped his knuckles, walking over to the turntable and hopping up onto it. “Plus, I’ve got a few other bones to pick with Queen myself. Even if she is a madimoyselle.” 

“That’s definitely not how you pronounce that,” Sweet muttered, before looking up at K_K, who seemed unsure. “Cakes, c’mon. You can’t seriously tell me that you’re okay with what she’s doing.” 

“I haven’t been okay with what she’s been doing since the time you first came back to the Fields,” K_K said plainly, but still hesitated. “I don’t want things to get worse for you.” 

Sweet looked down, feeling guilty, but more determined at the same time. “...And I don’t want things to get worse for you and Cap.” 

K_K stared at him for a few moments, eyes searching. Sweet wasn’t sure for what, exactly, but it made him feel uneasy all the same. “Okay,” K_K said eventually, Sweet’s spirits lifting, “but just music. And nothing that’ll get us in too much trouble; we’ll just play the songs we like and that’s it.” 

“Deal,” Sweet stuck his hand out, and with a small smile, K_K shook it. The two of them turned towards the turntable. “Now let’s get out there and– Cap don’t you dare touch that I will actually kill you!!!” 

— — — 

Embarrassingly, Swatch didn’t notice that Master Sweet had managed to sneak away until the next dinner, when he’d accompanied the other Swatchlings to bring him his meal. The window was wide open, but nothing resembling a rope was hanging from it, so Master Sweet had almost certainly had help– most likely, his two friends from the Cyber Fields. 

According to the Swatchlings, the room had been empty the entire day, but they had figured he was hiding under the bed again and thought nothing of the open window. Swatch had half a mind to fire them right then and there, but ultimately, that decision would be up to Queen. 

Unfortunately, that wasn’t where Swatch’s trouble ended. Shortly after the discovery, Swatch caught wind of a video of three protestors of the music ban vehemently opposing Queen’s new law and defending themselves against Queen’s new Werewires. He had a sinking feeling that Master Sweet was involved in this, which was proved to be correct once he actually watched the footage. The video itself was quickly trending, and he knew it would only be a matter of time before Queen saw it– if she hadn’t already. 

He decided that the best thing to do would be to tell Queen about this, hopefully before she came across it herself. So after submitting a request to see her (which was immediately granted, as all requests sent from Swatch or Tasque Manager were), he made his way to her bedroom/office/whatever was most convenient for her at the moment and knocked on the doors. 

As he waited for her to open the door, he had to squash down a lot of feelings of apprehension. Her Majesty the Queen was rarely in the wrong, but he could not, for the life of him, understand the music ban that she’d set into place. Especially when her surrogate son was part of the subsect of Darkners created to produce music. 

However, it was the Knight’s will, and the Knight was only wrong as often as Queen was. If Queen saw it fit to listen to the Knight’s advice to set this ban in place, so be it. 

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the door suddenly opening, although Queen was not directly behind it. This wasn’t an odd occurrence, so he walked inside, only to stop short when he saw that she was sitting… in her throne. Which she’d brought in here, for some reason. He shook it off quickly; Her Grace often did things he didn’t understand, but she always had a reason. Even if he never understood those reasons either. 

She appeared to be watching something, with her facing away from him, and while he was loathe to interrupt her, she had allowed him in the room, so he cleared his throat. “I have some… unfortunate news for you, Your Grace.” 

“Yes Swatch Darling What Is It,” she hummed, her statement sounding nothing like a question. She often spoke with an odd cadence, and even more so when the Knight arrived, so he ignored it. 

“Master Sweet…” he hesitated, swallowing, but pushed on regardless. “Master Sweet managed to abandon his grounding at some point yesterday. I and the other Swatchlings deeply apologize for our lack of attention.” He paused, still hesitant, but continued, “Furthermore, it appears he’s joined his friends from the Cyber Fields in… rebelling against you, My Queen.” With that, he snapped his beak shut, bracing himself for her ire. 

“Oh Yeah I Know Lmao,” she replied, turning her chair around to reveal she’d been watching the very same video he had; the one that showed Master Sweet sending a volley of attacks at a Werewire. 

His blood went cold for a moment, before he realized that she didn’t sound upset at all. “You… are you not bothered by his?” he asked, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. 

She laughed. “Of Course Not, He’ll Be Fine.” She waved a dismissive hand. “It’s Just: A Phase.”

Swatch couldn’t quite keep the disbelief out of his voice. “Just… a phase.” 

“Yes, He Is Just Having A Phase,” she nodded, dismissing the video. “Once He Grows Up A Little Bit He Will Realize He Is Wrong And Will Come Back. The Knight Told Me All About It, Trust.”

Hearing that should have put his mind at ease. It should have reassured him that there was nothing to worry about, that there would be few to no repercussions for this development. Instead, it only filled him with a sense of unease and the feeling that something was deeply wrong. “And you’re not worried about him at all? That he’ll get hurt resisting you?” he asked, fighting to keep the apprehension off his face. 

She merely shrugged in response. “I Have Informed Every Werewire And Swatchling To Bring Him Back Unharmed, So No.” She waved him off, bringing a new video back up. “Now Shoo, I’m Watching The Latest Season Of: Cyber World’s Funniest Home Videos.” 

Reluctantly, he bowed and exited the room, still feeling as though something just wasn’t right. He tried to ignore it as he walked back to the Color Cafe, but something told him that new, terrible things were coming, and that whatever Master Sweet was going through, it wasn’t ‘just a phase’. 

— — —

Notes: I hate this a lot. Like, a LOT a lot. If I never have to look at this again it'll still be too soon. But I'm leaving it here anyways 'cause I spent too much time on this to leave it rotting in Google Docs. Also here's the link to the series if you want it (it's not an actual series; it's more of a place for me to dump my SCC-centric fics):

[catnippackets]

How to come up with tunes basically. Like how to make music that sounds good. How to put different sounds/instruments together in a way that is enjoyable. All I have to work with is GarageBand but I feel like everything I’ve tried to make just sounds like… disorganized? Idk it never sounds like it flows well. I try to do it like the songs I’ve enjoyed do it, where it starts with one sound/instrument/beat and then more sounds are added one at a time until the additional complexity makes it sound better and better - like what you did in Help Like You. How do I do that is what I’m trying to ask, I don’t know if I’ve articulated that properly. How do you put different sounds together in a way that doesn’t sound like a mess?

this still feels very vague to me so I'm just gonna try to explain what I do and hopefully that's of at least some use to you lol I'm not good at all with explaining my process behind any art that I do so I honestly don't think you're gonna get much out of this but I'll try anyway (I also cannot read or write music so idk if that will make my advice better or worse lol)

music does not come naturally to me, at least making songs never feels very natural. usually in the past when I've made music it's felt like I would just wake up one day and my brain would know that something had to come out today and then I'd write the song and then I wouldn't be able to do it again for another like 8 months. it's a little easier to do it now though. when the melody doesn't just come to me like that I usually either fiddle around w a keyboard (I'm sure there's one in garageband if that's what you're using) and hit some notes that sound nice together and then just kind of go from there. OR what happens a lot is I'll be in bed right on the verge of falling asleep and I'll get a little tune in my head that comes from nowhere and then I have to quickly roll over and hum it into my phone before I forget it and then when I wake up I do something with it lol. usually I come up w the melody for the chorus and then for the verses you just sort of build off the chorus to do something that fits with it?? idk how else to explain it

another thing that works in my favour in this regard is I'm really bad at mimicking other people's styles (both visual art and music sounds), so if I'm listening to a song and hear like a drum beat that I really dig I can think "hm I wanna make a song with that drum beat" and then when I recreate it, it really sounds nothing like the drum beat I was trying to mimic, but it still sounds nice and then I have a nice new song that you can't tell was inspired by something else at all bc I can't copy things lol

I would say if you're having trouble, do a bunch of covers of songs you like first instead of starting with your own music. make a playlist of songs you really like and study them, see how the different sounds work with each other, and then try to recreate them, so you can see how many layers go into a song and what makes other people's songs work. you can start small, with the bass/harmony and then singing along with it, like someone who just plays the guitar or piano and sings, and then progress to adding more instruments. adding harmonies will make the melody stronger. adding a bass line (no specific instrument but it will probably be very low) will sort of support the melody and give it a little more depth without distracting from it. the beat will indicate the speed of the song (generally the beat is what you dance to, instead of the melody). you don't need all of them to make a good song, it can be as simple or complicated as you like, but there's plenty of songs out there that only use like one instrument and still sound lovely so you don't have to get too crazy, especially not at first

also I've never used garageband cuz I don't use apple products but before I bought fl studio I used bandlab, which is free for anybody to use and super easy, they have a wide range of instruments and you can also add premade loops too! just in case anyone else is reading this who can't use garageband, the layout looks very similar to it (the only annoying thing is you only get 16 layers which sounds like a lot at first but truly is not lol)

good luck!!

[boxfullaturtles]

1,10,11,14,16,37,39,42,43,60,65,75

smoly hokes dude okay,,

1. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered fics?

I think I actually prefer one-shots. Shorter, faster, telling a tiny story rather than a lengthy one. I actually struggle with multi-chapter and it's been years since I finished writing one. Hoping to change that with Adagio...

10. Cltr+f "blinks" on your WIP & copy paste the first sentence/paragraph that comes up

They were eyes that never blinked, never faltered, and captured every moment.

Kinda cheated and dropped the "s" so I would have something to actually share lol. Not telling you which WIP this is from either >:3

[the rest under the cut because this got so long,,,]

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

Uh uh uh b-but I don't I mean I have a lot of favorites I don't have like a tier list this is a lot of pressure um,,

Okay for strictly TMNT fics, I guess I really love Little Scraps of Wisdom by clandestineClairvoyant because it's just. The softest damn thing and I love the characterization of the turtles. Dawning of the Hour by that brilliant bastard Faiakishi has been killing me slowly and I adore every agonizing second of it. And The Lemonade Leak by TurtleSoupSwimmer keeps yanking the rug out from under me just when I think I've gotten shit figured out. Also shout-outs to basically everything Dandy writes but in particular Tapping Out because I relate to that fic so hard and it makes me feel Seen, Violet Neon Nitro by TractorTeeth because fuck me does it scratch that Mad Max itch in my brain box and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the descriptions in it, and The Last Ronin Discord Shenanigans for giving Ronin a happy ending and some very interesting and well written character interactions.

But if we're talking not just TMNT? Then Poor Wayfaring Stranger by lithos_saeculum is one of my number one fics; a FFXV fic and I don't mind if it never gets finished because it's already 60 incredibly well written and amazing chapters that I have reread multiple times. The Good Mourning / Ghost!Jake AU by corruwuption is a Micoverse fic gut punch that I adore and it's written so well and just!! Ahhhgg! Ghost Jake wrecks me every time. And Audience: 822,000 and Homeland Security by WerewolvesAreReal is just. It's my favorite Leverage fic and it's so in character and silly and I absolutely love well-executed outsider perspective fics.

14. how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

As an extremely emotional person who cries about anything and everything, yes and yes. I definitely put myself in the character's shoes. Although this sometimes has a habit of backfiring as I start writing myself into of the character and then have to go back and edit everything. Oops. But yeah I also draw from personal experience where I can. Different people experience different emotions different ways, everyone reacts differently. But having gone through Some Shit helps me understand certain things better.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Uuuhhh something like...eleven? Or twelve fic ideas? I think? Haha can't stop, won't stop lmao heLP

Man I dunno which ones I haven't shared anything about yet...I guess my extremely self-indulgent, almost everybody lives, future au crossover thing that would be a multi-chaptered nightmare of a beast and will likely never be written. I should just mess with that for funsies sometime.

Anyway, here's a sketch thing I never finished based on it. Like I said. Very self-indulgent.

37. How do you choose where to end a chapter?

Eh, vibes. Usually when I'm writing and I feel like I'm near the end of a chapter, I just get a feeling. Like "aw yeah, this is the moment". Once in a great while there is a pre-planned cut off point, a scene I know I want to end a chapter on, but that's an infrequent thing.

39. Share a snippet from a WIP.

You really just want all my secrets, huh?

42. What's the last fic you red? Do you recommend it?

Oh man, looking at my history and everything I've read recently has just been updates from fics I already subscribe to. I haven't had a lot of time to try and read something new... Looks like the last thing new thing I read was a one-shot of 2003 Leo called Oh Shoot by halogalopaghost. And yes, I do recommend it! A very good study in 03 Leo being a fucking dumbass. :)

43. Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

Do you even know me!? I delight in whump and suffering! I have a Bad Things Bingo Card for a reason! My turtlesona is Goretello! Mad scientists, unethical experimentation, body horror, and non-consensual body modifications are my bread and butter! I am an unashamed edgelord gorehound horror lover!

60. Have you had a writer you admire comment on your fic? What was that like?

It was like: "ajkdhsfjald omfg this really cool, very talented, very awesome person liked what i wrote omg??" because I am a child. For real though, it's always really flattering to see someone whose talent you admire respond to something you've created! It feels good and it makes you like your thing just a little bit more, I feel.

65. Tell us about what you're most looking forward to writing - in your current project, or a future project.

There's stuff in "Adagio in Green" that I am really looking forward to! Things ramp up rather quickly and I'm very excited to get to the stuff I have planned! Not gonna lie, it gets a little bit...how do I put this...well, I think I've mentioned already that I plan on giving these Rise boys the Farmhouse Arc they were robbed of in the show. That's not the only thing the show's cancellation robbed them of and I'm wedging so much of that shit into Adagio it's almost stupid.

Okay last one...

75. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took you longest to write? What was difficult about it?

Uh well, buddy, you didn't provide me a fic sooooooo guess we're going with "Adagio in Green".

It wasn't just a scene but the entirety of Chapter 6, the chapter that's going up next week, gave me A LOT of trouble. I deviated from my outline (and I'm still deviating from it because of chapter six) and it threw everything out of whack. I couldn't figure out how to get things going. It either felt too rushed or too stagnated.

I feel better about it now that it's actually finished, but I'm still nervous about it.

Actually, I get nervous about every update I post,,,

[goldenpinof]

Hi me again, sorry for sending another ask on this, i just think the conversation is really interesting, feel free to delete the ask if you dont feel like another long post lol

Its an interesting perspective definitely, I liked reading it and I agree with a lot of what you said, and I dont think either of us or anyone other than them will know the real behind the scenes. I just think that the idea that dnpg is only there to keep veiwers happy is and serves no other purpose, undersells a little bit how much they themselves like the content that they made/are making. I guess, I dont know if they plan on expanding it, or if you're right and it may be the same content (except more unhinged I agree) and then fizzle out again after a few years once they move on to different things — But I just dont really agree that its nothing more than something to squeeze an extra couple bucks out of the dan and phil brand. Im not naive enough to think that money plays no factor, and maintaining their brand is unimportant, they have a very expensive mortgage and relatively extravagant lifestyle to pay for, so obviously making money is important, but i also believe that they are really passionate about entertainment, and I think that they are geniuinly proud and happy about the dan and phil brand and what theyve made over the years. Especially with how much dan has spoken about how important it is to him that what he produces represents him authentically, and tells the narrative how he wants to tell it, so i dont necessarily believe that even dnpg could just be a throwaway project for either of them. I want to believe that they are doing it for a purpose more than monetary gain, even if that purpose is to transition into newer content. Because as proud as i think they are of what they've made, i think they are ready for a new era, I dont know that either of them are really all that passionate about the 2016 style of youtube vlogging and gameplay anymore. But i also think they are finally understaing that completely disregarding it and their history doesnt work either. To be honest, I didnt say it, but was quite nervous about a dnpg return bc even if some of it was a mess, I really quite liked that they were evolving their content, that they were exploring new avenues, bc to me comfort videos can only go so far. Before the revival i hadnt watched a dnpg video in over a year. I only really thought about dnp when they uploaded something, and I was starting to fall out of the loop with everything. But once that first video dropped I could see this isn't exactly a copy and paste of 2018 videos. They have matured they have changed their style a bit and im happy about it, but I also really want it to evolve further bc if its just nostalgia hour for another 4 years, idk how long ill be hooked for. Im not 14 anymore and I dont want to be 14. I want to watch content made for a maturer audience, that represents who they are now. I grew up with them and that means a lot to me, I thought i would never outgrow them, but it only really works if I actually get to grow with them, if they grow aswell. Which is why im skeptical about the style of dnpg as it is, and im hopeful that this is just a transitioning period. Idk maybe none of this makes sense, and it doesnt even really matter anyway, bc honestly ill probably still be keeping up with them to some extent even when im 50. Its just interesting to think about all the directions thos could all go in, and its interesting to hear another perspective on it all.

(This follow up ask was far longer than i intended it to be, i apologise in advance)

you see, i agree with you on mature content and heading in this direction. i was asking for it for years. i just never thought it would land on dnpgames. AP was my main target because it became the main source of content after 2018. Dan's content was already mature for a couple of years before he "left youtube". idk how gaming would be mature though? swearing doesn't make it one. and that leads to other types of content like podcast or regular liveshows.

idk, if it's a mechanism to protect myself or just bitterness. but after 2019-2022 i don't believe they (Dan) will jump on dnp brand and do what we have been begging them to do since 2019. i just don't believe he completely changed his opinion after wad, sat down with Phil and made a whole ass 5-year plan for dnpgames including all our wishes and suggestions (which he was so opposed to right till he went on tour). the timing is very suspicious. the timing of everything including the change of their managers. money is involved, and that's okay with me. (i want people to understand, that when i comment on dnp doing something for money, it's not a negative comment. it's their job. if the revival of dnpgames is 80% to make an easy bank — good for them! as long as we have content that we enjoy i don't care if money is a huge factor in its existence. again, youtube adsense, sponsorships, brand deals — it's their job. as long as they are not killing themselves or losing all authenticity in the process, go right ahead. i worry about their marketing like my life depends on it, because marketing gives more views and engagement = more money)

call it a stupid trauma or whatever but i am afraid they're gonna drop us suddenly again. we got dnpgames back but it's so fragile because we don't know the reasons, plans or anything that could secure us. in 2018 liveshow Dan said, "i'm not leaving youtube", and then he did. and they killed everything dnp related, one by one. i remember the feeling, and i don't like it. i had to completely forget about dnpgames, bury it, and let it go. and now, here we are :)

for you and people who think like you about dnp's plans for dnpgames, i hope you're right and won't get disappointed. i, personally, can't allow myself to get my hopes up ❤️

[rise-my-angel]

The Rhaegar and Lyanna plot point is the one plot point that has been the most hurt by GRRM seemingly abandoning the series and projection from the show depiction lol. Personally, I don't think they 'ran away' for either love or prophecy. I think Rhaegar and the KG ran away with Lyanna to Dorne to protect her from Aerys or Aerys men because she was the KOTLT. I think he wanted to avoid conflict and then ended up creating an even bigger conflict that annihilated his family - it's the kind of irony GRRM would do. I do think Rhaegar and Lyanna fell in love/lust/infatuation along the way. I don't think both ever ran away with the intention of having a sexual or romantic relationship or to have an adulterous affair, though it ended up happening anyway.

Now, this being said, it's still super problematic and even if I believe Rhaegar had nobler intentions, than even his stans think he did, this all still makes him a borderline pedo/pedo because he's a man in his 20s lusting after a 14/15 year old girl. This leads me to my next point, I don't think Martin understood this when he wrote it. I'm just gonna say it - GRRM has a weird fixation on barely out of their pre-teens girls and sexualizing them and romanticizing these relationships they have with men in their 20s and 30s. It's a pattern across the series and I think he uses the 'muh medieval ages' as cover to depict these relationships. No, I'm not accusing him of anything IRL but I think he uncritically includes relationships like this to be edgy and because he's a bit of a freak when it comes to his writing. Like, no, Martin, a grown man lusting after a 13/14/15 year old girl was not normal or a ok thing back in the medieval ages and sure as hell isn't now. Except instead of seeing these men as deeply morally depraved for their pedo-ish tendencies, Martin thinks this is some quirky personality trait that makes them 'morally grey.'

It's a hot mess and it's one thing if Rhaegar and Lyanna were some irrelevant side relationship in one of his histories, but unfortunately they are a central couple. An under-discussed reason he's not finishing these books is because so many of his ideas will no longer fly in 2024. When you take 30 years to work on a series, social mores change so much that a lot of what was fine will be skewered by critiques and readers now as opposed to the 90s.

So you have made me wake up and choose violence, so be it.

First of all, his ideas do still fly because Rhaelya is still a popular ship that people will die on a hill defending. But most importantly, in regards to the canonicity of that ship I prefer not to speculate about grrm too much. You and I don't know him. So we have no idea what his process and ideas really look like. I do not want to have a morality discussion surrounding the intents of an author, that is not my interest in the series.

That being said, to be nice, I am going to verbatim copy and paste something from an ask I preciously answered about Rhaegar and Lyanna to explain why I completely disagree with you:

"Likely somewhere around the Vale is where this happened, considering the timeline of where all of the Starks currently were at the time she disappeared. So when she is in the south, Rhaegar has a lot more resources to do this. So he waits for a time Lyanna is alone and approaches her. Now she's just a 15 year old girl now suddenly alone with the Crown Prince, likely as intimidated as she is a little star struck considering who he is. Rhaegar needs to lure her away far enough that she won't just run for help. So he promises that as the prince, he can help legally break Lyannas unhappy betrothal for her but does not tell her how. Offer her something she wants without details and get her to come with him. By the time Lyanna likely put together this isn't what she thought it was and that she's too far away from her family to be safe, is when the actual kidnapping occurs. She goes with him willingly thinking he wants to just help her with something in her life, with no way of knowing he was about to separate her from her family. By the time Lyanna realizes she is in a bad situation, she's too far away from anywhere she knows to get help and has no choice but to go with him. She is 15 years old, she's just a girl now fearing for her life if she tried to run or fight now. And by the time he takes her to Dorne, he keeps her in a tower with three of the best Kingsguard to ensure she does not escape and no one comes to get her out. He then stays there until he knows shes pregnant, a situation she also likely did not fight back on because of how isolated and powerless she already is here. She is all alone, fighting back could mean her life. Then of course, word gets out of what Rhaegar has done, Brandon Stark, who has no way of knowing he's taken her to Dorne, goes to Kings Landing to try and demand his sisters return, accompanied along with their father to help and the rest is history. Make no mistake. They never spoke before that day. Rhaegar was the Prince and heir to the Iron Throne, who is married to a Dornish Princess and now has 2 children of his own including his own son and heir. Lyanna is a 14-15 year old girl, and the firstborn daughter of a major Northern house who live a thousand miles apart in completely different regions of the country. They would NEVER have been able to share any correspondence together and no one knew or would have found out long before that day.

Ravens dont just fly to the person the letter is for, it goes through a system of people, usually a Maester who facilitates the incoming and outgoing letters, who then either himself or a squire, hand delivers the letter to the correct person. Note most times especially in the first season, when important letters are delivered to the Starks its by either Maester Luwin or Grand Maester Pycelle, and the letters seals have already been opened, hence why they know who to deliver the letter to. Example: How would Luwin have known the letter at the start of the series was from Lysa or how would he have known it specifically was for Catelyn if he did not have to open it first to read its contents to find out. SOMEONE in the Stark household would have realized that the 14-15 year old Lyanna was receiving letters from the Prince, if not just someone important from Kings Landing, and stepped in then and there. And if he wrote her out of the blue, the first thing Lyanna would have done was tell her family that the PRINCE had sent her a letter. We know the Starks are all very honest with each other, if he wrote her out of the blue, she would've told her brothers. Also, there are spies everywhere in Kings Landing. If Rhaegar was sending secret letters, someone would've found that out and to whom. Note Catelyn had said she doesn't trust a raven to carry the words to Ned about the attempt on Brans life, or her saying Lysa's head would be on a spike if the wrong person read her letter about the Lannisters. Meaning even she well knows that it is very easy for letters to get into the wrong hands. Someone (lets be real, probably Varys) would have learned Rhaegar was sending letters to Lyanna. Which in the well over a decade after her death, would have said something to SOMEONE that they were sharing correspondence. Davos line in season 2 of "Lord Varys knows what you had for breakfast three days ago. There are no secrets here." Is clear cut enough to imply that even a man who grew up in Flea Bottom, knows that if you live in Kings Landing, Lord Varys knows you and your secrets already. Rhaegar was not sending secret letters to Lyanna and no one knew or no one said anything in the conflict that followed or in the decades since. Lyanna did not run away nor go to him willingly, she would have no way to even communicate with the Crown Prince and heir to the Iron Throne without a single soul learning that information. Her family would have found out and the Starks would have done something about it then and there. Lyanna likely went with him thinking that he was taking her somewhere reasonable to help her legally end a betrothal she didn't want, not knowing it meant he was taking her away from her family and by the time she realized, she was likely too powerless and in lands she's never been in before to try and run. Also Lyanna deeply cares about her brothers. The story of the Knight of the Laughing Tree is all the evidence needed to show that she is deeply loving and loyal to her family and the people of the North. She would not run from them just beacuse of a betrothal she didn't like, she loved her brothers dearly. She was taken from them. She was tricked into walking into a kidnapping under false pretenses. Rhaegar was a fully grown man in a position of great power who used Lyanna's young naivety and venerability to his advantage. Lyanna did not need to be carried away kicking and screaming for it to still be a kidnapping. Also the idea that Lyanna did not want to marry Robert because he already had bastards and slept around, would leave her entire life and family behind to run away with a man who is married with 2 children is braindead."

Also there is ZERO proof ANYONE knew who the Knight of the Laughing Tree was let alone AERYS. The idea thats why he took her is so out of left feild I think you just made that up. But no offence, that is the most nonsensical explanation I've ever heard.

But remember, grrm introduced Rhaegar by telling us he kidnapped and raped a 15 year old Lyanna. He did not paint this as a love story. Go re read the first book. Neds perspective showcases that this was never a love story and grrm did not start this series portraying it as such.

The idea too that he is taking so long becasue of Rhaelya is kind of dumb. Its a non canon ship that has no actual evidence what do you mean? Go re read the series and tell me where he's written himself into a hole on that one.

He hasn't. Because he has not written it as a love story.

[livycheshire]

❄️~°• Arctic's heart •°~❄️

❄️ Part 3❄️

Synopsis:

No summery 😓

Disclaimer: I do not own happy tree friends, I have made this au with the help of @thetravelerstale, I do not own Flippy, Flakey, Flipqy or Tiger general, I only gave them last names and first names for the storyline, everything else, plotline and other characters belong to me.

Warning: language, time skip and pov changes

~°Justin's POV°~

'I'll show those bitches, who they think they're messing with.' I thought to myself as I sat at my desk, typing away on my computer as I typed on my blog, oh revenge is sweet~

Especially, when it's you dishing it to your enemies.

I smile as I keep typing, sometimes to look back at Red, just to make sure she's ok. I mean, she had me worried all last night. But when she came back, I was relieved, but also worried, she was too pale this morning, and me, being the good friend I am and because I'm a nurse in training. I figured she could have signs of her drinking past her weight. But, Then again, there's always the possibility of it becoming a pregnancy. She did tell me that she did meet someone at the club this morning, plus her legs felt like Jello? Signs of her having intimacy for the first time. Plus, I don't think she's on any birth control. But then again, also a sign of a feverish virus. She hasn't always been the best at dealing with sickness' well.

"Hm?" I snapped out of my thoughts and freaked out a bit "must've been too into my thoughts…" I sighed and deleted everything that was related to my thoughts and rubbed my tired eyes, before getting up and looking at the time. 'it's already five o'clock, damn, well I better head to the store to get a few things, before night school starts'

With that, I quietly sneak my way to the closet, which is by Red's bed, as I don't want to wake the possible pregnant princess, if she is, plus I do not want to be a shish kabob, trust me, it's happened before and it's highly unpleasant.

Anyways, after heading into the restroom and getting dressed, I headed outside of the dorm, making sure to take my copy of keys, and head out the door, locking it up, before heading downstairs and out of the dorm building, and to the parking lot, where I get into my car and drive to the store.

~°No one's POV°~

Meanwhile, Red woke up two hours later, groaning and yawning, before stretching out, her quills, shivering and rattling as she stretched out before sighing softly and relaxing once more.

Picking her head up, expecting her roommate to already be in class, she sighs, before noticing a gift basket for her from her roommate sitting on her nightstand and a box of pregnancy tests.

She sighs before giggling tiredly "Justin…"

She inhales deeply and sits up, rubbing her eyes and looks around 'well, at least I can watch a movie, since he won't be back until midnight. I have the whole dorm to myself' she smiles before getting out of bed and heading to the kitchen to make her something to eat. And to the bathroom, to put away the box of pregnancy tests. 'jeez, we don't even know if I am or not, but I better put these way'

~°small time skip°~

After getting herself some vanilla ice cream, she sat down in the living room, and turned the TV on, pulling up Netflix, and going onto her own profile. "Hmm, I wonder if they have any good comedies. I mean, they should, but let's find a good one." She smiles before scrolling through the streaming platform.

After a while she picks a movie, and lays across the couch, watching the movie and eating her ice cream with a few cookies in the ice cream. Laughing, at a few parts, and overall having a good time.

By the end of it all she had fallen back to sleep, closer to the time Justin would be back, with a few tubs of ice cream and cookies around her, as she snores softly.

Unaware of the sound of the unlocking door, as it opens.

But upon seeing the scene, Justin stopped and sighs before smiling "jeez Red, that's a lot more junk food, than you've eaten before, this better not become a problem" he sighs before closing the door and locking it back up. Setting his stuff down, he goes to Red and picks her up and lays her down in her bed, before heading to his bed and falling asleep instantly.

~°•few weeks time skip•°~

~°Red's POV°~

"It's been a few weeks since that night, and I've been so sick, I don't know what it is Justin, I can barely get out of bed, what if I just have a stomach bug or I ate something bad?" I sat, sighing as Justin raised an eyebrow at me "or, you could be pregnant, Red, this is serious. You've been throwing up all morning, every morning for the past five weeks. it's time to take that test, but if it comes out negative I'll let you shish kabob me" Justin reasoned, causing me to deadpanned before sighing "fine, fine, I'll take a test, but that won't prove anything" I said pointedly at him, before sighing and heading to the bathroom, to take a pregnancy test.

~°small time skip°~

"Ok… the recommended time to wait is about fifteen minutes" I said softly while looking at the box in front of me, while reading the instructions. "So I just have to pee on it, and then wait for the results" I nod, before tearing open the box and taking out a test, before doing what needs to be done.

1 minute…

5 minutes…

7 minutes…

I sighed and waited for the results, sometimes, pacing the bathroom, as my thoughts started to consume me. 'oh what am I going to do? I don't have that much money to raise a kid, but I can't stay here if I do end up pregnant, I mean, sure I can get a babysitter, but it won't be fair to the other tenants-' "gah-!" I jumped out of my thoughts by the sound of knocking on the bathroom door.

"Red?" Justin called out "are you ok? It's been thirty minutes" 'really? It's been that long?' "o-ok, sorry! I just got too into my thoughts, I'll be out in a sec" I sighed and grabbed the test before opening the door, and looked up at Justin.

He smiles softly "ready to see?" He asked as I smile, nervously, and nod, "yes"

With that we headed to the living room, and sat down on the couch. My nerves are going through the roof.

The big reveal…

As I inhale deeply Justin pulls me into a hug before I look at the test… pin drop silence, as we stare at the test, waiting, but clearly we both see it… the one line that showed our results. I slowly turned to look at Justin, who sweat drops and chuckled nervously. "Umm… false negative maybe…?" He asked with uncertainty in his voice.

My quills sprout from behind my long, red hair, as I stare him down with the most unimpressed look on my face. Making him flinch, and his eyes widen.

"You have until I count to ten, to grab your dorm keys, and run like hell." I say with my voice dangerously low. He nods quickly and gulps "n-noted, running away now…" he said, his voice strained in fear, backing away slowly. before he bolts for the door, taking his keys and running like his life depends on it. Which it kinda did.

After counting to ten, I bolted after him, quills slightly laxed, as I raced after him. Following him every which way. Stopping for a bit when I followed him to the stairs.

Losing him, until I looked down, and saw his tail, sticking out at the very bottom of the stairs. Smirking slightly, I quietly sneak down the stairs, stopping just above him, before crouching down ever so silently.

Hehe, hearing him scream like a baby, really made My day. I hope the next will be better

[ariondevereux]

nikkaaaaa, hello!

Ask incoming heh, what song would you assign your oc with? Like their theme song! 👀✨

i wanted to do as many ocs as i could but this was so much harder than i thought 😭

maya: be kind - halsey

i don't know why you hide from the one / and close your eyes to the one / mess up and lie to the one that you love / when you know you can cry to the one / always confide in the one / you can be kind to the one that you love

so we all know about maya’s emotional baggage 😔 this song is pretty much what jordan and the team especially phoenix want to get through maya’s head. they just want her to let them be there for her

lira: people i don’t like - upsahl

everybody in this party's fucking fake / i really wish that I could say it to your face / but i won't, so / hello, it's so good to see you / we met before, but nice to meet you / yeah, i don't really wanna be here

lira isn’t snobby but she barely goes out of her way to socialize because as the mayor’s daughter, she’s seen enough fakery and has had enough people butter her up for connections and she doesn’t want any part of it

abby: that way - tate mcrae ft. jeremy zucker

every time we talk, it just hurts so bad / 'cause i don't even know what we are / i don't even know where to start / but i can play the part / we say we're friends, but i’m catching you across the room / it makes no sense 'cause we're fighting over what we do / and there's no way that i’ll end up being with you / but friends don't look at friends that way

still can't tell / if we both mean well / keep me guessing / if this is life or hell / think i might've said too much, bit the dust / now i’m kinda dizzy / overthinking us until i’m drunk and sick of this whole city / don’t know where to start / don’t know how to hold my heart / and if we're really what we say we are / then why is this so hard?

the duet version screams shiloh and abby. i have like a better explanation in my head but i can’t put it into words 😭😭 but it’s about them exchanging mixed signals because there’s shiloh whose flirting can be straightforward but sometimes he’s careful because he doesn’t want abby to feel like he’s stringing her along. like i imagine that’s also him lowkey trying to make his feelings known but there’s abby who always takes it the wrong way and thinks he’s just a natural flirt and that at the end of the day she’s still just his best friend and that’s all she’s ever gonna be because sometimes he’s too flirty and sometimes he’s not flirty enough and as much as she swears she can sense there’s something going on between them, she’s scared it’s one-sided and like if her heart is gonna get broken by someone, she really doesn’t want it to be shiloh. ugh the pining is so good but also frustrating because for two people who claim to know each other better than anyone else, they have too many mixed signals

piper: dear no one - tori kelly

so if you're out there, i swear to be good to you / but i’m done lookin' for my future someone / ‘cause when the time is right, you'll be here but for now / dear no one, this is your love song

the rest of the song is so piper actually, especially the verses about her enjoying her own company but i’m not gonna copy and paste the whole song djsjsks anyways like implied in the lyrics, piper is a romantic but she’s not desperate and rushing. she definitely wasn’t looking for anything when she met nikolas. it just sorta happened but it felt right from the get go sooo <3

cece: take off all your cool - sabrina carpenter

you don't always gotta leave me guessing / i know you wanna leave a good impression / but you did it, you did without tryin'

idk how the romance route is gonna happen in canon but in my head, reese and cece catch feelings for each other at around the same time. not just the “she’s hot/he’s hot” kinda crush. it’s more like reese genuinely feels comfortable to show cece this side of him that’s less smooth and more goofy, like more him. in my head, he starts to smile a lot more than he smirks and yeah. cece likes it 🫣 lololol but yeah cece didn’t really mean to like Like him but she sees him in a new light and she badly wishes she’d see that reese more often

emory: love again - new hope club

tell me, have i lost my mind again? / i get the feeling you might feel the same / tell me you can feel that love, feel that love again / and even though we're in this crowded room / i’m feeling like there's no one else but you / tell me you can feel that love, feel that love again

i think it’s self-explanatory 😭 but yeah she never really got over qiu and this is exactly how i imagine her thot process when she meets him again

bianca: fucked up summer - rosie darling

it’s gonna be a fucked up summer without you / ‘cause i can't stop thinkin' about you / kissing your tattoos, smokin' in your room / i let my guard down, i never meant to

ignore the fact that this is a song about an ex or smth as well as the “summer” part lmao anyway bianca didn’t mean to find love shortly after a breakup but she met shay and the heart wants it wants </3 idk how it’s gonna happen in the game but if shay’s down, bianca would definitely want to try and make the long distance work because there’s no way shay would ask her to stay in sg when she has her studies in nyc. either way, the lyrics are what i imagine bianca thinks about when she leaves sg—just her reminiscing the short time she spent with him. there’s also a line that goes “my bracelet, shoelaces i stole from your combat boots” and that is something bianca would definitely do

[lovelivingmydreams]

Oooh. Oh wow! Virgil looks like he is having a bit of a moment there. I'm guessing you guys want me to go ahead and tell you what happened huh? Well...

Almost the instant Virgil woke up he wanted to hide under his blanket in embarrassment. He remembered very clearly how Roman had carried his half asleep behind to bed. How was he that fit? Roman hadn’t minded, if he had he wouldn’t have done it… he was a bit of a people pleaser but Virgil was pretty sure that they had gotten to a point where Roman would have just told him to get out off the couch and to bed by himself if he had issues with carrying him. His embarrassment over that situation fading just a little, though he was almost certain Roman would tease him about it the second he stepped out the door, he remembered looking up at Roman and suddenly thinking that from that angle he looked very similar to Poetry Prince. Was it problematic that he was that familiar with the jawline of Poetry Prince from that specific angle that he could say with a fair amount of confidence that Roman’s was similar? Maybe? He was not too keen on asking Pikani that. Emil was great. But even he might struggle not to laugh at him if he told him about this situation. Anyway. Classes needed to be attended and stuff like that. As predicted, Roman was not going to let last night go. “Good morning Princess,” he greeted playfully. There was still a part of Virgil that squeezed in a sort of pleasant nervous way at that nickname. “Morning charming,” he replied as he combed a hand through his hair. “I have to head out a little earlier today, so I won’t be joining you for breakfast. Try not to miss me too much,” Roman winked before petting Nox and heading out. “Later!” Virgil called after him as he sat down and immediately found Nox by his feet demanding attention. “You are a little monster you know that?” Virgil wondered with a smile as he stroked their fur. Receiving an approving mewl he copied playfully.

Virgil surprisingly made it to the weekend with nothing weird happening. He had made a habit of sharing lunch with J when they could, Janus loved the Hill pastries and Virgil gave him the directions so they could get them next time they were feeling like having some quality baked goods. According to Janus, ShockWave was planning a thing on Sunday and they agreed on bringing a game of Uno along to kill some time. On Friday he had some time in the computer lab to work on a few things his laptop couldn’t support. He kinda liked working on his own. As his fingers flitted over the keyboard and his commands wove together to something sensible for the computer to work with, building a usable bit of software bit by bit he got in that pleasant zone where he barely felt like he was in his body. He was still doing the work but it was almost like he was on an autopilot.

His thoughts free to drift to some weird dreamstate where his anxiety didn’t exist but his thoughts were still as active. Just not as scary. Thoughts of seeing Prince and a fun spontaneous get together with the gang flitted through his mind, Janus meeting his other friends, traffic being a mess and better taking the scenic route home today, smaller chance at an incident, Saturday… Lots of stuff on Saturday… Numbers on his screen… Like the lottery.

“Mister Grimm!” Virgil looked up a bit dazed, glancing at his screen where the nearly finished project sat glowing back at him. He glanced at the clock. Wow, he should head home soon. He then looked back to the man who’d been calling him. His AI professor. “Oh hi professor Daniels. Sorry. Zoned out for a minute there,” he said sheepishly as he finished the last bit of coding and saved it on his student’s profile to review and sent to his software professor later. “I gotta get going. Sorry again,” he insisted as he walked past the concerned looking professor. Weird. Surely he’d seen someone space out before right?

He found Roman on the couch, half watching a movie, half typing up something on his laptop. “Better luck next time,” he said without looking up. It had really almost become a standard greeting between them. “Dinner’s in the microwave,” he added while buzz lightyear led his friends on a mission to save their friend on the screen. “Thanks. Toy story marathon?” Virgil wondered as he went to the kitchen to heat up his plate. “Yeah, I couldn’t focus in a quiet room so…” Roman explained as he typed something down. “What are you working on?” Virgil added. “Spelling and grammar assignments. We were given actually published works and we have to correct them. It’s the worst,” he replied. “That sounds like actual torture. I think they put those subjects in just so we wouldn’t forget school is the worst,” Virgil mused. “That’s a conspiracy worthy of one of your videos,” Roman noted, making Virgil laugh.

“By the way, I got a date with your crush on Sunday,” he announced as he settled on the ground to eat at the coffee table to be more sociable. “… He is not my crush,” Roman sighed annoyed. “Good, then it’s no problem he’s going to sweep me of my feet on Sunday,” Virgil retaliated, not believing him for a second. He was way too invested in the fan section of their parlor. “You are way too happy about that. Do you have a crush on him or something?” Roman challenged, a bit too defensive, just saying. He had a point though. “Now that would be embarrassing,” he stated simply. Not wanting to elaborate on the platonic gay panics Prince had caused over time. “You probably should find a way to give Prince a heads up so he knows to plan it in his schedule,” Roman muttered. That… Wasn’t a bad idea actually. “Hm… I’ll think on that,” he muttered. He did. But it was a bit tricky to contact Prince. He didn’t want to use the prince pager to meet up for a coffee to give him an update without warning. Virgil knew he always rushed to the scene when he used the panic button his dad had insisted on. He'd seemed upset the one time he’d been late. So he didn’t want to disturb the guy if he didn’t have to. Funnily enough, they kind of did end up meeting for coffee by coincidence.

He’d decided to pick up some professional coffee and some Hill pastries for their lunch on Saturday. Right when his order was called he heard police sirens and shouting outside. When he left the building he saw the agents put a masked person in the back of one of their car. “Well, this is a new one,” a voice noted from above him. Virgil looked up and found Prince grinning down at him, floating in midair, slowly lowering himself down. “For once, you are not in the crosshairs,” he teased as he landed besides him. “Special order?” he wondered pointing to the two cups in his tray. “Yeah…” Virgil stated. “Pumpkin Spice Late with caramel and extra sprinkles. Right?” he grinned smugly. “Roman tattled,” Virgil huffed. “A fair trade for your favorite nickname I’d think,” Prince shrugged. “I don’t think I properly thanked you for introducing us. It was truly an enlightening experience,” he added. Virgil supposed they had earned some retaliation for all his sass and teasing. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to be salty about it. He started walking home. Prince strolled along. “I must say I was surprised. I took you for a ‘coffee as black as my soul’ type,” Prince mused. Virgil shrugged. “I am. I’m just not that bitter and a little spicy… And gay,” he added. “Sprinkles are gay?” Prince wondered. Virgil nodded sagely. “Extremely,” he stated as if it was a scientifically proven fact. Prince grinned and leaned in a little. “Then you should have way more,” he grinned. Virgil huffed and started walking faster. “See you tomorrow. Noonish!” he announced as he noticed that Prince was letting him walk away. “Until then Princess!” Prince called after him.

When Virgil got home he tossed the pastries on the table and put the coffee down. “I brought lunch,” he called out with a sigh. “I know that smell. You are a life saver,” Roman grinned as he emerged from his room and headed to the kitchen for plates. “How is it going?” Virgil asked. Roman had decided to take the weekend to clean up his notes for all his courses. Rewriting them in a more comprehensive way to make it easier to use them for study rather than the accumulation of his random mental notes as they occurred during the lecture. Virgil agreed to join him and had left the house for some fresh air. “Honestly? I haven’t read another letter since you headed out the door,” Roman admitted. Virgil chuckled. “Should’ve joined me. I ran into Prince in a not nearly lethal way today,” he announced. “Oh? Well that’s a new one,” Roman stated. Virgil looked at him. “Okay. That is almost exactly what Prince said,” he stated. Roman blushed and laughed a bit awkwardly before changing the topic to the pastries. Not a crush huh? On Sunday Virgil had a shift at the library that happened to end around noon… Okay maybe he’d asked Jay to try and line up the kidnapping with his work schedule so he wouldn’t be an inconvenience to his boss. Mrs. Carlson was a very sweet lady and he wouldn’t want to stress her out if he could help it.

Virgil liked working at the library. It was quiet, didn’t trigger his anxiety or his power that much and when it did it was usually fairly obvious what was about to happen. When he was picked up as he walked out of the building he had his deck of uno cards tucked away securely in his hoodie pocket. “Welcome back mister Grimm! I am sure you are wondering what vile scheme has lead you here today!” Shockwave gloated as Virgil was brought before him. “Is it going to involve failing to embarrass Poetry Prince but instead making him way more popular?” Virgil drawled feeling a little bored as he reached his cuffed hands into his back pocket and activated the tracker. ShockWave scowled. “You are feeling much to comfortable in your predicament. I’ll take that feedback into account, don’t worry. But I’ll leave you to your sitter. My genious plan shall unvail itself with time!” ShockWave announced. “He was so going to monologue about it,” Virgil huffed as he was sat down in a somewhat secluded area but not out of sight with Janus who took his cuffs off since the room they were in was being locked from the outside. “Agree. So you bring the game?” they wondered. Virgil showed them the goods. “I warn you. I’ve never lost a game of Uno, ever,” he stated. Janus rolled their eyes, not believing him. Well. Guess he’d find out the hard way then. “Let’s play,” they stated.

Very soon Virgil was pretty invested in the game only half paying attention to the chit chat. Something something, watersuply, something something, red 5, something something, bakery, something something deranged speech… “Prince incoming in three, two, uno!” Virgil stated as he held out his card, a color change, in triumph while Prince blew the doors open. “That’s a good pager you got. Also dumb luck on that first round,” Janus insisted as they collected the cards and started shuffling them again. Virgil just chuckled and they played another round, and another, and another. Prince should watch his step. “Two paces to the left Princey, also Uno!” Virgil announced. “How…” “How did you win again!?” Janus demanded. Virgil shrugged. “I warned you.” Not long after that Prince defeated shockwave and let them out after he dealt with the latest diversion. “Thanks for looking after him I guess,” Prince allowed. Janus, now looking like Bob Ross, waved him off. “No problem. Now go be happy little gays somewhere else,” he stated. “That look does not suit a sore loser,” Virgil grinned before he let Prince take him away. When he got hope, Roman seemed to be back on a ‘waiting for him to freak out’ mood. It wasn’t uncommon in Virgil’s social circles. Even Logan who was the most chill about everything occasionally expected him to be more upset than he was. But the breakdown didn’t come and they went on with their lives, though Roman kept glancing at him weirdly on occasion.

Still life went on and college resumed on Monday. Roman did manage to finish his note purge though showing off his colored booklets that would get new clean notes added more regularly the rest of the year he promised. They both chuckled at the likelihood that this would be as clean as the notes were ever gonna be and each headed to their first responsebilities of the day. That evening Roman came in a bit later with groceries. Prattling on about this cute kid he helped get his balloon back like he was a damn Disney prince yet again while putting the groceries away. He was pretty much dancing around the room and shoed Virgil away whenever he tried to help. “T’was such a darling sight, when his eyes were so alight!” Roman sighed cheerfully and Virgil stiffened. Almost like his power. But not quite. It wasn’t the rhyming, though it did help. No it was that pose. Something about it made so many things line up so neatly all of a sudden. “Oh my god!” he exclaimed.

@kittylikesflowers @just-my-interpretation @naturallyunstablegamer @meowthefluffy @moonlightshow00 @frida0043 @angelic-cali @selenechris @theblackveilinreverse @roseianxiety

Raven poetry

Chapter 13: Puzzle

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[maedaex2combo]

More Than Pale

Chapter Two: When Feelings Go Unspoken

Post-retcon / Post-sburb

[CH 1] ==>

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Pairings: Dave x Karkat x Reader (GenderNeutral!Reader Human!Reader)

Warnings: Strong language, Alcoholism, Angst.

Word Count: 16.3k (itsmorethistimeimsorry)

Summary: After sobering up and getting your music career up and running again, you reconnect with an old friend from your tour. This causes more than a few issues between you and your two "platonic" best friends. Is it jealousy or is it for your well-being?

A/N: Holy shit I finally finished this chapter LMAO. God this took me forever y'all I'm so sorry. I'm literally in a foreign country right now for study but I'll be damned if I let that stop me (I only let it slow me down significantly). Anyways I was kind of struggling with what direction I wanted to take the story to get the boys to realize their feelings, but this is what I came up with! I hope it's good because I can't keep reading over this monstrosity of a chapter anymore. But we've got a new character and high high tension in this one. Sorry for all the angst! But it'll be worth it in the end ;) Enjoy!

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Lets get into it x2

It’s been a month!

A month of sobriety. A month of working on your new album. A month since the breakdown video, which ended up getting cleared up with both the public and your friends. The dinner with Rose and Kanaya was awkward, you’ll admit, but they actually helped with their advice about staying sober. The picnic with Roxy, Calliope, and Jade was helpful as well and encouraged you to spend more time with your other friends. All in all, you were doing a lot better now! You even wrote one of your songs about your journey towards recovery and self-love so far. In a livestream, you ended up crying at how supportive your fans were. Things were really looking up for you.

The album was maybe about halfway done now. At the moment you’re currently working on your track with Dave as a feature and writer. He’s been having trouble with his own writing, despite all his work being very good, as you continue to tell him. You think he’s just being especially hard on himself since he knows this will be largely produced and listened to by millions. You’ve been patient though, always, for him.

The room is scattered with papers, whole ones and crumpled ones. Really, this was not very eco friendly. You probably could’ve written in a tablet or something. All the tech though was being used for recording, beat making, mixing, etc. There's cords everywhere like a death trap. It’s a mess.

You’re reading over one of the verses for the thousandth time when Dave walks back in again with AJ and a water for you.

“so what do you think?”

“Dave. Every time I tell you it’s perfect! You’re the one who’s nitpicking.”

“yeah but if it’s perfect then why do you keep giving me feedback?”

“Because you insist!!!” You laugh a little at the ridiculousness of the past several hours spent going back and forth like this. You stand up and hand the paper towards him for the last time. “This is it, Dave. This is the final draft. I officially have no more comments.”

“but-“ he starts to protest.

“Nope!”

“ok just-“

“Nuh-uh.”

“dude-“

“No!”

He finally breaks out into a smile. “okay! okay. but just for the last line. I think that-”

“What was that?? I think someone’s calling me, I can’t hear you. One second.” He sighs as you clearly answer a fake phone call. “Hello? Who is it?… Oh my gosh, Barrack Obama???… Wow, such an honor to talk to you sir. To what do I owe the pleasure?-“

“hey. don’t bring him into this.” He says, but there’s still that little amused smirk on his face.

“Oh, what’s that? You read the copy of Dave’s verses I sent you? Thank you, sir! And what’d you think? Oh, wow…. Really??? You think it's THAT bangin?? That’s great! I’ll let him know!” Dave rolls his eyes behind his shades as you pretend to give Americas greatest president your farewells.

“thats not funny. identity theft is a crime (y/n).”

“You know what’s not a crime? Being confident in your bomb ass work. Seriously, why are you so anxious about it? You like your own music, don’t you?”

“of course bro. i write the fucking sickest raps on this planet.”

“Then why-“

“this is different. im not just posting this on my shitty little personal noisecloud account. this track might end up playing in every goddammed mall, cafe, club, and whatever else is on earth c. this is gonna be like- my own official debut. if i put this song out there on your album, its gonna be the whole planets first real look at my music. people are gonna search me up- and if it’s too good then theyll look at my old songs and be all ‘aw shit dude this guy actually sucks’. but if its not good then theyll just assume my music is ass and wont even bother-“

“Dave.” You cut off his rambling suddenly, taking a step closer to him.

“what??” He snaps, clearly stressed, as he whips his head around to look at you.

“It’s good. I promise it’s good.” You take one of his hands in both of yours. “It’s just as good as all your other music. I promise you. Your debut will be a huge success, I already know it. You don't have anything to worry about.”

It’s silent after that. He just stares at you for a while, and the assumed eye contact feels weirdly intimate after a moment passes. From your point of view, you think maybe you went too far. You just wanted to reassure him, but you probably made him uncomfortable. 'I really have to draw the line for this stuff somehow' You think. You start to blush a little out of embarrassment, and quickly let go of his hand to turn away and clear your throat. Not that that makes it any less uncomfortable.

From Dave’s point of view, well, he’s not even quite sure what he’s feeling. He's had these weirdly intimate moments with you ever since he found out you had feelings for him. Did he ever get this flustered around you before that? He cant remember. It’s a good thing that he doesn’t usually blush very much, because it must’ve been unnoticeable to you. He wishes it was unnoticeable to him too, the way his heart started to beat faster when you touched his hand and comforted him, and even faster every second your eyes stayed connected. It felt so nice, it left him speechless long enough for you to think he was uncomfortable. this is weird… this feeling… i have a matesp- boyfriend. so why do i feel-

And then you’re pulling away. And he shakes off the weird emotions he doesn’t want to address as quickly as they came.

“Anyways.” You quickly add onto that comically awkward cough as you make your way back to your own desk with your own writing. “If you want to keep perfecting it, that’s fine. But y'know that one saying… Uhh what was it… Don’t fix what isn’t broken? Right?”

Dave nods. “yeah i guess.” He replies as he goes to sit back down at his desk. Right before he can take a seat, someone knocks on the door of your workroom. You both know who it is of course.

Karkat opens the door before either of you even get to say anything. “HEY. SORRY TO BOTHER YOU TWO WHEN YOU’RE ‘IN THE ZONE’ OR WHATEVER. BUT SOMEONE'S AT THE FRONT DOOR ASKING FOR (Y/N).”

“Huh?” This catches your attention, turning your body in your chair to look at him. “Who is it??”

“NO FUCKING CLUE. HE SAYS YOU KNOW HIM.”

Your heart sinks a little, immediately assuming the worst. “Oh, shit. Is it one of the guys I’ve dated?? Tell them I’m not here!!”

“NO, (Y/N). UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME, I THINK I WOULD RECOGNIZE THEM. IM PRETTY SURE IM SO TRAUMATIZED BY ALL THOSE DATE NIGHTS, THAT THEIR FACES ARE ENGRAVED INTO MY FUCKING THINKPAN FOREVER AGAINST MY WILL. BUT I'VE NEVER SEEN THIS DOUCHE BEFORE.”

Now you’re curious. And apparently your two friends are as well, when they follow you into the hall and quietly peak their head out from behind the stairs to see who the mystery man is.

When you open the door, you need to take a second to get a good look at him. He has curly black wolf-cut hair, and when he takes off his expensive-looking maroon shades, he’s got really well drawn black eyeliner on. You immediately recognize him now that you can get a good look at his face. He was one of your openers on tour! You spent a couple months together and he was really cool from what you can remember. You can’t believe you forgot to keep in touch! Then again, a lot happened for you.

“Rael!!!” Your face lights up and you excitedly pull him into a hug, taking him by a bit of surprise, but his smiles big when he returns the hug.

“(Y/n)! Hey! I missed you, dude!” The two of you pull back, grinning. “How you been? I saw all that stuff that happened last month and got worried. Thought I’d come check on ya!” Karkat and Dave share a confused glance with eachother.

You laugh a little, embarrassed that he had to read/see about that. “Ooohhh yeah… that was crazy! Haha.. But I’m doing a lot better now! I’m working on my next album!”

“I heard! I bet it’s coming along great.” He compliments, putting his hands on his hips. "Your tracks are always groundbreaking."

You blush. “Hahah.. Thanks! But yeah, it is coming along really well." You’re smiling bigger than you have in a while. It feels so good to see another artists from your tour again, brings back good memories, as exhausting as the trip was. There were people who made it worth it. “Would you… like to come in?” You suggest suddenly on a whim.

“Oh, that’s okay! I know you’re busy. I just thought I’d come by and say hello, since I was in the area.”

“Are you sure? I'd love to have you over for a while! Maybe I could show you what I’ve been working on?” You suggest, a little bashful. You haven’t shown anyone but Dave and Karkat your work so far. It’d be good to get another artists opinion as well.

“Hmm…” He takes a second to think, looking off to the side. “Well, alright! Since you insist!” He agrees suddenly, and the two of you laugh, chatting some more as he walks in alongside you into the house. Dave and Karkat go back into the workroom when they notice you coming in.

When you two enter to see them, Rael is the first to speak. “Hey! These must be the god-friends I heard you talk about so much!” He announces, and you blush a little. “Its nice to finally meet you two! The famous Dave Strider! I heard your beats are nice!"

"sup." Dave nods in resonse, his hands in his pockets.

He looks over to Karkat. "And uh… Wait don’t tell me… Kitkat?”

“KARKAT.” He sneers, immediately put off by this guy.

“Oh right! Haha, funky name.” He totally misses the aggravated response. Humans sometimes have a hard time with troll names, but it comes off as xenophobic if they don’t even try or apologize. It’s one of Kar’s many pet peeves. He only didn’t go off on the guy because Dave immediately took his hand behind his leg to calm him down subtly. You laugh a little awkwardly to fill the short, yet thick, following silence.

“and who are you?” Dave asks, melancholy.

"Oh right. Guys this is-"

“Name’s Rael! I’m a friend of (Y/n)’s. We were on tour together!” He cuts you off, but you don't think much of it.

“His music’s really good! I thought he could help us out a little bit. Maybe give us an outside view for editing purposes?” You smile, intentions good, totally forgetting Dave’s thing about privacy and how much he would and does think that's an awful fucking idea.

“im good.” Is his short reply.

“What? Dave!” You immediately retort.

“It’s okay, I can just take a look! I don’t have to give any real criticism if you don’t want it!” Rael offers, but Dave’s cold expression doesn’t budge. There’s a very tense air in the room right now. The silence unfortunately pushes Rael to continue his paragraph. “Hey, I get it man! Some people just can’t take it, I’ve had a lot of friends go off on me for-“

“yeah. really. im good.” Dave reports again, cutting him off in the same tense tone. “you two can knock yourselves out though. think im all written out for today anyways.”

Then he’s grabbing all his writings that he can see and walking out of the room. Karkat follows behind, not without his signature dirty look glaring directly at your friend. The door slams after him.

Yeah. They’re never really elusive or subtle with how they feel, are they? As much as Dave tries to be. This doesn’t surprise you, but you’d be lying if you weren’t a little upset. Also, it was a little bit out of character for Dave to be so cold to someone new. Why was he acting so weird?

“Well then!” You say, clapping your hands together and faking a smile, trying to forget that strange interaction. “Shall we get started then?”

You two spend the next several hours in the workroom. Every laugh from behind the door seems to vibrate throughout the whole house. The intense air followed the two boys into the living room where they’ve been biding their time doing whatever the hell they could think of. Mostly video games. Theres no real one set reason to why the events of today seem to put the two in a bad mood. Karkat of course didn’t like this 'friend' of yours based off first impression, but he doesn’t ever like new people honestly. He’s also just pissed he has to deal with him being in the house for this extended amount of time, even having to see him walk out to use your bathroom once. It was silently pissing him off. Or as silent as he can get, only warranting a few angry outburst rants to Dave saying things like “HOW LONG IS THIS ASSHOLE GONNA STAY IN THERE?” and “HE MIGHT AS WELL FUCKING MOVE IN AT THIS POINT.”

Dave on the other hand didn’t really have a problem with the guy, other than the way he greeted Kar earlier, which also set a bad first impression for him. He’s more-so annoyed with you, for suddenly bringing in a stranger and offering to share his personal work with him when you know- or should know- he wouldn’t like that. He was already struggling with the track, and now he can’t even work on it for today. But it’s whatever. (It’s not.) At least that’s the conclusion he’s come to.

Finally, after what feels like forever, at 11:48pm, Rael finally gets escorted out into the front hall. He says goodbye to your friends, which grants him what sounds like a muttered goodbye and a headnod without eye contact. (I’m sure you know who’s who.).

You hug him in the doorway and send him on his way, satisfied with how tonight went. Other than maybe one thing.

You walk into the living room and stand in front of the TV as to get your best friend's attention. They both look up at you.

“Hey… I’m sorry about earlier. I know what he said was maybe rude, and a little intense. But I promise he’s a cool.”

“YEAH RIGHT. THAT GUY SEEMED LIKE A SHITHEAD.” Karkat says immediately, sitting tucked into the corner of the couch.

“Karkat.” You frown at his never-failing bluntness.

“its cool. just maybe dont bring him into the workroom again.” Dave says from his spot chilling on the floor, looking at something on his camera.

“Why not?”

“because dude. i got my work in there too. you know i don’t want some random people seeing my personal feels-jam shit.” He says plainly, glancing up at you now.

“Okay, well, he’s not just some ‘random guy’, he’s my friend.”

“big emphasis on ‘your friend’.”

You sigh, moving forward to sit on top of the coffee table. “Okay, I’m sorry. I just thought maybe he could help you get inspired! If you gave him a chance, I'm sure you’d see he’s really great and you two would hit it off… Artistically, I mean.” You say the last part glancing at Karkat nervously. He didn’t care of course.

“maybe. but i just met the dude today.”

“AND HES AN ASS.” Karkat adds again, arms crossed.

“He is not. You’ll see. I’ll bring him over again and you guys can actually talk this time.”

“PLEASE DONT.” He chimes.

“Karkat, can you at least try to give him a chance? This could be good for us.”

“FOR US? WHAT THE HELL ABOUT THIS IS GOOD FOR US? NEITHER OF US WANT HIM OVER.”

“But you guys should really be meeting more people! I finally have the chance to introduce you to someone you don’t know, but I do! This could be a chance to maybe socialize? I think you guys need it.-”

“and i think you obviously have a thing for this guy.” Dave suddenly adds.

“What!?” You blurt out, very thrown off by this accusation.

“cmon (y/n). you were putting on the happy-go-lucky ass demeanor you always have when some dude youre into is around. and you were laughing like every minute.”

“LOUDLY. IT WAS INTERRUPTING MY GODDAMN THOUGHTS.”

You frown at this sudden accusation, and blush intensely at their teasing. “I do not have a thing for him!! He’s my friend!! And I’m trying to make him your guys too!”

“hard pass.”

“DAVE!” You shout in protest. He finally has to let out a snicker at how insistent you were being about this. It really couldn’t be more obvious. You blush harder.

“alriiiiiiiight alright. fine. if it means that much to you then ill try.”

Your smile finds its way back again slightly, still blushing. “Thank you.” Then you turn to Karkat.

“NO.” Is his immediate response as soon as you make eye contact, because he knows exactly what you’re about to ask.

“Karkaaaaatttttt” You plead. “Pleeeeaaaaaseeeeee!”

He glares at you, and you keep strong with your pouting, waiting for him to give in. This is held for a weird amount of time, as Dave watches, pretty amused by it. And then-

“UUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH” He groans loudly and throws his head back, signaling that he's given in.

“Thank you!!!” You immediately respond to his groaning. You go over and give him a big hug, to which he weakly tries to retract from, as an attempt to show how much he did not want to agree to this.

“OH WHATEVER! GET OFF ME!!!” He yells, starting to blush lightly, but you can tell by his weak squirming that he didn’t actually dislike it. If he really wanted you off, he’d be clawing at you like a cat or something. You’ve seen it happen. 

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And so your fate was set.

After that night, Rael comes over and tries again with the two boys. It goes better than last time, but they’re still not quite convinced. So, he comes over again, and again. And again. But it unsurprisingly becomes less and less for their sake.

One day, the two of you actually go out on an official “date”. To which the boys are very skeptical of, considering past mishaps. You insist to them it’ll be fine.

“We’ve been hanging out with Rael for a few weeks now! It won’t be any different than how it usually is hanging out with him! I’ll be fine.”

So, hesitantly, they let you go. They’re silently anxious and impatient when they wait for you that night, trying to bide their time in a way that tried to make it seem like they weren't both feeling this way.

To their surprise and relief, you come back totally sober. And happy! They haven’t seen you this happy in a while. Maybe this is a good thing after all… Right?

It’s an hour since you got back from your date with Rael and you’re in the bathroom doing your nightly routine. When you hear a knock on the bathroom door, you give your permission for them to enter, and in walks Karkat. “Hey Kar. What’s up?” You say, only glancing at him for a moment before going back to applying toner.

“SO… TONIGHT REALLY WENT WELL? LIKE YOU’RE NOT LYING AT ALL?”

“Yes. I promise you it went well.” You assure him again, despite having done so ealier.

“OKAY… YEAH. BECAUSE YOU SEEM REALLY HAPPY… ITS KIND OF WEIRD.”

You hold back a laugh, but it comes out anyways kind of like a snort. “What’s that supposed to mean?! It’s not like it was a date with just any random person like before!” You exclaim and he nods, leaning against the door, arms crossed. “Plus, you should know since I’m totally 300% definitely sober. Do you still want to test me just in case? I’ll walk in a straight line, look!” You start to do so as a joke, but realize after a few seconds that something is off with him. He looks lost in thought. “Kar.. What’s up? Is something wrong?”

The question seems to snap him back to the moment suddenly. “WHAT?! YEAH. I MEAN NO!! IM FINE.”

You frown, titling your head a little. “Are.. you sure?”

It’s quiet for a moment.

“…YOU REALLY LIKE HIM THAT MUCH?”

You smile, making sure once again that he knows you’re very serious about this. “Yes! I really really do. Seriously.” You reassure him, but you don’t realize that’s not at all what he wanted to hear. “I’m actually thinking about asking him…” You continue, but trail off.

“TO BE YOUR MATESPRIT???” Karkat shouts, eyes widening slightly and arms dropping.

“Well… yeah. I mean…“ You look away sheepishly. “Do you think I shouldn’t? I know how you guys feel about him, so-“

“YEAH. GO AHEAD. DO IT.”

Your head shoots back to him, surprised, not noticing the tensity of his response. “Really?!”

“YEAH. DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. GO BE HAPPY WITH HIM OR WHATEVER.”

This time you notice the harshness, but you brush it off as the usual grumpy commentary you get from your friend, not reading much into it. “Oh!… Okay! Thank you! I-“

“IM GOING TO BED. NIGHT (Y/N).” He says and he’s leaving before you can even protest.

“..Night..” you say weakly, even though no one’s there anymore. You hear a door slam down the hallway. Something in your heart sinks as you replay what just happened and analyze the look on Karkats face that whole conversation. It was almost…

You don’t even know. Really, what was that?

Anyhow, after that night, you two do make it official. Rael is over more often. Then, suddenly he’s spending the night “since he stays so late anyways”. The boys get used to him, but no closer to him at all. They more-so just put up with him for your sake. It’s what they had figured they might have to do when you eventually made it official with someone unfortunately. But there’s still always been something off about Rael, the way he’s so “chill” and “happy” all the time, to the point where it seems almost passive aggressive. There was a time where they watched while you disagreed with what they were ordering for dinner, and it almost seemed like he manipulated you into agreeing. But he was so subtle and upbeat about it that it was hard to point out. Plus, it’d be weird to address that they’re being that observant. Things like that happened pretty often, but they never decide to address it outwardly.

Work on the album continues as well. You’re more inspired and motivated than ever. Dave and you finalize your collab together, and all that’s left now is recording. What could go wrong?

… Lol.

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A few weeks pass since you got into your new relationship. You, Dave, and Rael took today to go to the studio together. Karkats been alone at home for a few hours, not wanting to tag along. He decided to actually try and bake you two something as a surprise, being the romantic yet non-physically-affectionate troll that he is. He knows the baking is done when the oven starts smoking. That’s definitely how this works.

As he goes to take the (basically burnt) pastries out of the oven, the door swings open with a loud bang, and then slams close with the same volume. Karkat nearly drops the container when the sound comes out of nowhere, followed by his clearly aggravated boyfriend flying into the room. He takes a seat on one of the dining room chairs. It stands quiet for a moment as Karkat stares at the blonde in shocked-confusion, oven mitts and pan still in hands.

“…DAVE?” He finally says to get his attention. 

Dave quickly whips his head around to face him. “yeah? whats up?” He asks without hesitation, acting as if he didn’t just make a scene, and isn’t home earlier than expected.

“WHAT HAPPENED?? WHY ARE YOU HERE??”

“what? a dude can’t fly into his own home and take a seat on his comically high dining room chair?”

Karkat blinks a few times. “ISN’T IT EARLY FOR YOU TO BE HOME? ARE YOU FINISHED DOING YOUR-“

“yep. we finished early.”

“OKAY… WHERES (Y/N)-“

“probably still recording.”

“PROBABLY??? BUT-“

Another unnecessarily loud bang as the front door opens, and you come flying in.

“CAN WE NOT JUST OPEN THE DOOR LIKE NORMAL FUCKING PEOPLE?!” Karkat yells, now very aggravated after almost dropping the baked goods on the floor for the second time.

“Dave!!” You yell, remaining hovering above ground when you come to a halt in front of him. “What the hell was that about?! What do you mean you won’t do it?!”

“WONT DO WHAT??” Karkat asks from behind you, still confused.

“i just don’t feel like doing it anymore.”

“What?! But we spent so long working on the song! What happened?”

“YEAH SO IM SURE ITS A BIG FUCKING SURPRISE TO ALL OF US, BUT IM WONDERING THE SAME THING!!” Karkat interjects between the two of you, really desiring some type of answer.

You sigh, looking over to Karkat. “Dave suddenly said he didn’t wanna do the song anymore after we spent like not even a half hour trying to record it. He just said he didn’t want to do it and flew out!” You turn to look at Dave again. “I had to leave Rael at the studio to come chase you!”

“yeah well why don’t you go back to him then?”

“UGH! Why are you being like this??! I thought you liked the song!”

“i do.”

“Then why?!”

“i just don’t want to produce it anymore.”

“But!… but…” You trail off, not sure what to say anymore.

Silence. The three of you stay still for a moment, Dave looking to the side, you staring at him, and Karkat staring back and forth between both of you with—you guessed it— a still very-confused expression. You guys usually never argue like this. If you fight, it’s always lighthearted, but this felt different. None of you know how far you can take this. You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down before you speak again. You lower yourself so your feet touch the floor, slowly.

“Fine.. fine. We won’t release the song.” You say as calmly as you can. “But… can you please tell me the actual reason why?”

“…”

You and Karkat both stare at him, waiting for his response. The silence is deafening.

“i don’t want him working on the album.” He says, finally turning his head back to face you.

“What??”

“your boyfriend.”

“Why not?”

“because he ruins my flow.”

“Your flow.”

“yes.”

You turn your head from him to roll your eyes.

“Dave. He’s been helping me with almost this entire process. I can’t just not credit him or exclude him from production suddenly.” You tell him, crossing your arms.

“then i don’t want my song on the album. ill release it on the next one or something.” he says, mirroring you by crossing his arms, and leaning back in his chair.

“Are you serious right now?” You say, totally taken back at how stubborn he was being.

“yeah.” The two of you glare at each other, him straight-faced and you just straight-up pissed off.

This is really the first time things have ever gotten this heated between you guys, surprisingly, and it felt so weird. This never even happened when you three were stuck in the same building on a meteor in space for three years. There was bickering, sure, but never actual heartfelt aggression. The worst it’s ever gotten was when Karkat and Dave first met and fought all the time. But you’ve never actually fought with either of them in a serious light.

At this point Karkat’s had about all he can take while being silent. “ALRIGHT.” He finally drops the pan on the counter, and whips back around to address you both. “CAN YOU TWO JUST FIGURE OUT A GODDAMN SOLUTION? WITH ALL OF THE FUCKING BARELY-ANYTHING I KNOW ABOUT THE SITUATION, FROM MY POINT OF VIEW THIS IS PAINFULLY STUPID AND POINTLESS.”

“Tell him that! He’s the one who’s being totally unreasonable!” You retort, gesturing with one hand to Strider.

“i just don’t want my song on the album, is that such a big fucking deal? you have plenty of other ones. just make one with him or something.” He says coldly.

He’s never been this heartless to you. His words sting. You really wanted to release this song with him. It felt special, since you two put so much into it, it’s one of your favorite pieces off the whole disk.

Your frown gets deeper. “I want to release our song Dave. We worked so hard on it!”

“okay let’s just release it as a single then.”

“BUT WH-“ You take a sharp inhale. “Yknow what?” They both watch you as you carefully calm yourself down. “Fine. Let’s just release it later then! If that’s what you want.” You finally get out, in the most passive aggressively upbeat tone.

“okay.”

“Okay.”

“cool.”

“Great.”

“awesome.”

“Amazing.”

“rad.”

“OH MY FUCKING GOD. CAN ONE OF YOU JUST FUCKING LEAVE OR SOMETHING?! MY EARS ARE GOING TO START BLEEDING.”

“Gladly!” Are your parting words as you take his advice and fly up to your room. That’s when you know you’re upset, you don’t even bother using the stairs.

Karkat looks over at Dave somewhat sympathetically. Dave avoids eye contact with him, already knowing the look he’s getting.

“YOU WANNA TELL ME WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED NOW?” He asks, walking over to take a seat next to him.

Dave sighs hard and slumps into his seat, sinking into the hoodie he’s wearing. “i just cant fucking stand that guy. i dont even know why. i hate that i have to work with him. i already feel uncomfortable enough releasing my shit officially.”

Karkat nods along. Usually it’s him ranting, so he does take special care to be a listener when it’s Dave’s turn, which of course he's still good at with his history of people relying on him with their problems.

“-and like. he didn’t even say anything specifically. i don’t even know what it was dude. something just ticked me off and it was the last fucking straw i swear. like if i told you youd be like 'wow thats a fucking stupid thing to get pissed and quit about' but its not just that-“ He continues to rant for quite a while.

Meanwhile, you’re upstairs ranting to Rael over the phone. He only lets you talk for a short amount of time before he has to go, but he promises he locked up the studio and everything before he left. Still, you can’t help but feel discouraged about the whole thing as you lay on your bed, listening to your unreleased album through again with your headphones. Why was he being like this? Things were going so well… What happened?

You decide to go to bed early.

Time goes by too quickly for your liking after that. Dave stays stubborn, despite your pleading. And you really do end up releasing the album without one of its best pieces you were hoping to showcase.

Still though, it does incredibly well. It hits all the top charts, and passes record streams in less than a week. You’re getting bombarded for interviews, music video shoots, magazine features, etc. And yet, you haven’t taken any offers. You still barely go outside. You spend most of the day sleeping and just scrolling through the stats and comments on your phone. Things have been tense and awkward with your housemates ever since the argument. You’re not sure anymore if you’re still upset at Dave or upset at yourself that you actually went through with the release without him. Is that what he really wanted? It seemed like it. Karkat won’t talk to you about it either. It’s kinda been like the silent treatment.

You hate it.

Your boyfriend tries to beg you for some publicity, which he’s very rarely successful in. It gets a few appearances from you, but fans are still not satisfied. The little publicity you two do together, though, also gets him a lot of attention. Everyone wants to know more about you two and how you met.

You’re so tired. Why are you tired? Your boyfriend tells you that maybe you need to get away from your environment for a while. Maybe he’s right.

——————————————————————————————

It’s been about two weeks since the album release. Tonight there’s a dinner party being held at Kanaya and Rose’s gigantic house, to celebrate the album’s success and discuss deals with professionals interested. There’s lots of people there, musicians, producers, artists, directors, etc, and of course your friends. No reporters were invited, per your request stemming from past events anxiety. Karkat and Dave show up as well, to your surprise. You’re silently glad they still decided to show support in some way, despite not actually talking to you in several days. They came after you, and when you spotted them you got excited and nervous as hell at the same time. You never feel this way with them, it's like they're strangers suddenly?

You’re greeting all your friends as you make your rounds through the giant event hall. Everything is decorated so beautifully, of course the married couple always having an incredible eye for interior design. You make note to thank them again for all this later.

“Roxy! Calliope! June, so nice to see you!” You exclaim, making your way over to the group of three familiar faces. 

The black-haired girl in thick glasses and a blue dress stands up to greet you. “(Y/n)! Big congrats on the release!! I listened to it when it came out and I love it! Really inspiring stuff.” June says happily, beaming that toothy smile.

You mirror her reaction. “Thank you so much. I appreciate the support guys, really.”

“Of course babe!! We got you no matter what.” Roxy smiles, giving you a sly lil wink.

“Yes.. I’m happy to be of sUpport to any of my friends.” Calliope adds. “I hope to see yoU continUe down yoUr road of sUccess!”

You keep conversing with them for a little while before moving on. You talk to Terezi and Vriska, Dirk and Jake and Jade, and many other visitors for a little while. Eventually you get pretty exhausted from all the social interaction, and decide to take a break at the snack table you've been eyeing for the past half hour.

Your boyfriend accompanies you as you approach the table, decked out with insanely delicious looking treats. You don’t even know where to start.

“Hey sweetheart. How’s it going? How you feelin?” He asks, placing a hand on your lower back.

“I’m great! The album and the party have been such a success... What wouldn’t there be to be happy about?” You reply without looking up at him, placing a few fruits on your small porcelain plate.

“You say that, but I know something’s been buggin' you. You know you can talk to me, right?” He replies. You feel a pang of guilt for masking your feelings so much around him lately. You’re scared to complain to him about how much not being able to talk to your best friends is effecting you.

“Yes! Yeah. Of course." You try to shake off the awkward feeling of secrecy with someone you're supposed to confide in. "But.. I promise, I’m okay! I’m more than okay! I just can’t believe this is all really happening.” You insist as you move right to grab some small cakes, putting on a half-fake smile. You really are happy with how things are going. Everything besides that. You wish it weren’t bothering you so much.

“Yep! ...It’s all really happening, just for you. You deserve it, babe.” He reassures you. You smile, your heart warming at his words, finally looking up at him, but see that he’s actually looking around. Your smile wavers. He turns back to meet your gaze a little late.

“Well… I couldn’t have done it without you! You’re the best.” You say half-heartedly.

He smiles fondly, and gestures at a glass of champagne in his free hand. “You sure you don’t wanna celebrate with some booze tonight?”

“You know I can’t.” Is your automatic response.

“Yes, I know how you feel about it. But really, you’ve been so good about being sober. You deserve to let loose for just one night!”

You bite your lip a little, cursing yourself in your mind for even thinking about taking the validation as permission. But still, you shake your head. “I can’t, really. But I’m still enjoying the party! Don’t worry!”

He nods, not bothering to push anymore for now. “Well, I’ll be making the big announcement in couple hours. Make sure you’re ready, cus I’m gonna get some people to record, okay?”

You nod, smiling. He leans down to kiss you quickly before saying he’s going to socialize some more, leaving you to your snacking. You wave as you watch him go, long after he’s already disappeared into a crowd of people.

He’s so sweet. Really, it’s all you could’ve asked for.

So… Why did it still feel wrong?

Rose later approaches you as you’re dipping your 4th marshmallow into the chocolate fountain. “(Y/n). May I talk with you about something?”

You finish popping the whole thing into your mouth when you muffle back “Mm? Myeah, whasshup?”

She chuckles a little before continuing. “You'll have to forgive me for asking, if it’s somewhat out of line, although I can't imagine it being so. But is there something going on between you and Dave and Karkat? …Davekat? You three haven’t talked all night. Usually nobody can get you to separate.”

You feel your stomach sink a little at the unwanted question, and take a moment to finish swallowing your snack before you respond. “Oh, it’s nothing really. We just had a little argument a couple weeks ago and-“

“An argument? What about?” She inquires, keeping a calm gaze with your eyes even when you start glancing around awkwardly. Oh boy.

“Ohhhh Dave and I just had a disagreement about the album I released.. But It’s really not a big deal. We’ll get over it.”

Rose’s eyebrows perk up a little as she becomes more intrigued. You usually know when to keep quiet, but to be honest, you haven’t really had anyone to talk to about this. You haven’t even wanted to talk to your boyfriend about it, since it involved him for some reason, so you’ve kept it to yourself. So, in your early defense, you were probably just desperate for someone to rant to.

“So yeah...” You think maybe you shouldn’t continue.

“And what did this disagreement entail?” She pushes again in her subtle way.

“Okay so, we were supposed to have this track together on the album, right? And we spend sooo much time-“ aaaand you’re spilling. Man, that was easy. She didn’t even have to pry it out at all, you were like an open book sitting on a teachers lap during story time.

As you’re telling the story, you come to realize you’re not even mad anymore. You’re just sad. It starts out frustrated, but becomes a little depressing and self-depreciating as the explanation goes on. “And now I’m not even sure where to go from here. Do I apologize? Do I wait for him to apologize? Should I just be the bigger person and say something? But what if they don’t want to talk to me or-“

“I fail to see what else there is to do besides talk about it.” She bluntly cuts off your ranting a bit early.

“Huh?” 

“Lets say, hypothetically, you decide not to bring up the fore-mentioned subject again. I’m assuming talking to them at home is quite awkward right now because of the lingering elephant in the room, correct?-” You nod in response, which she knew was the answer, because she immediately continues. “-So, you continue to avoid them, and they continue to avoid you. But then, really, what’s next?”

You take a moment to think about it. What’s next?

“Well… I don’t know. But what if they don’t continue to avoid me?” You retort genuinely. 

“In that quite unlikely situation, knowing my brother and my practically-brother-in-law pretty well, then it would probably warrant the same outcome as if you were to be the first to speak. But the point is that someone needs to initiate some type of communication about the situation, or this unusually awkward train isn’t going anywhere. And like I mentioned, we both know well how stubborn those two are." She watches your expression become more discouraged for a moment. "If you feel so guilty about going on with the release without Dave, then I see no good reason it can’t be you to initiate. Why don't you just apologize?” You start what is about to be a protest, but she holds up a hand to silence you before you can. Then she takes a brief moment to bite into an orange slice she's holding in her other hand, from an orange you didn’t even realize she had been peeling. She looks to the side for a second to think while she snacks, then turns back to you. “Even if you feel like you did the right thing, or were only doing what he said he wanted, you still feel guilty about it regardless. If it’s bothering you that much, which I know it is since you just avoided using a chocolate fountain for several minutes to rant the subject to me, then I say you rip the damn bandaid off.”

You take her words in for an even longer moment again. She’s… right. Of course. “Yeah...” You sigh.

She places a kind hand on your arm to comfort you for a moment. "I'm aware of how much you all care about each other. Don't let something so fickle be what pulls you apart. That'd be a disappointing situation to see play out in this timeline."

You smile just slightly at her encouragement. “Thank you, Rose. I guess I’ll have to work up the courage to talk to them about it this week somehow.”

“Or how does right now sound?”

“What?!” You only look up for a second to see her smirking, staring at something behind you, before suddenly she’s taking you by the arm and leading you a few steps backwards.

Karkat and Dave are walking and chatting, looking at each other, before turning forward to see you two, at the same time you turn to face forward and see them. Your expressions of awkward-surprise are mirrored, not including Rose of course, who looks entirely calm and satisfied at how perfectly this moment just played out.

“Hello, Dave. Hello, Karkat. I don’t think I’ve gotten to speak with you tonight yet.” She greets. You avoid eye contact with them.

“HEY ROSE.”

“yo.”

“How are you two enjoying the party? I know it’s not your usual scene.”

“nah, its cool. you always throw sick ass events in your unnecessarily huge mansion.” Dave replies, ignoring the awkwardness of you being right beside her.

“Again, not a mansion. And interesting of you to say so when you hardly ever come to these so called ‘sick ass’ events in mention.”

“hey. im a busy guy, what can i say?“

“Is that so? Please enlighten me on such things that keep the great Dave Strider busy.” She jeers.

“oh yknow. god stuff. big responsibilities. nuff said.” He adjusts his glasses, smirking a little. Then he puts his hands in his suit pockets. You hadn’t failed to notice earlier that Dave actually dressed up a little for the dinner party. Karkat is wearing a sweater and black jeans, but it’s different from what he wears around the house at least.

“How mysterious.” Rose and Karkat both roll their eyes. You feel her nudging you forward a bit. “Well, it’s all for (Y/n) today. But I’m sure you’ve already congratulated her on the release and such related subjects, yes?”

“yeah sure.” “YOU COULD SAY THAT.” They respond at the same time, overlapping words. You’re still not looking at them.

Rose turns her head to the left to spot her wife waving to her. Taking this moment to complete her mission, she waves back and lets go of your arm. “Well, I’d love to stay and chat, but a host has her duties to attend to, doesn’t she?” She doesn’t miss when Dave smiles at the word ‘duties’ to no surprise. “I’ll see you all later.”

And then, to your dismay, she’s walking off in the opposite direction. Leaving you and the two men who you haven’t properly talked to in a couple weeks despite living in the same house.

It’s… uncomfortably quiet for a handful for seconds.

“UH.. YEAH CONGRATULATIONS ON THE RELEASE BY THE WAY.. (Y/N).” Karkat says carefully, and you look over to finally make eye contact with him. You notice that Dave’s looking off in the other direction when you take a quick glance at him.

“Thanks, Kar. Have you guys listened to it at all?” You ask, giving a weak smile.

“YEAH. IT WAS GOOD. I REALLY LIKED HOW TRACK 3 CAME OUT HONESTLY.” He replies genuinely.

Your smile also grows genuine now. “Oh yeah.. that one was your favorite, right? I’m glad.” 

Karkat nods, and when there’s an awkward silence afterwards, he nudges Dave a little bit to say something as well.

“i mean if you want me to be honest, i didnt yet. but technically i was there for the whole process of making it, so i already know what the tracks sounds like.” Dave comments flatly. Of course he was lying, he still listened to it when it came out, but he didn't feel like making small talk and half-assed compliments with the way things were with you at the moment. He just wanted to get to that snack table right now. Karkat scowls at him for his attitude, and continuing to make this conversation as awkward as possible.

You try your hardest not to get upset at this comment. “Well. I think it probably sounds a lot different now that it’s all put together… Maybe you could give it a listen?… Sometime?”

He finally turns to meet your gaze, pocker-faced. “yeah. sometime.” The seemingly cold response sends chills down your spine. It’s quiet again for a beat. “damn, im fiendin for a chocolate covered miscellaneous fruit right now to be honest.” Dave breaks the silence, completely changing subject and demeanor suddenly. He doesn’t bother looking at you again as he walks right past you to towards the table. Karkat follows hesitantly, and his eyes linger on you for longer than you’re able to notice.

Staring at the floor, you’re not sure what comes over you next. You start to feel a wave of emotion, everything from the past few weeks seeming to come up in your mind, everything you’ve been trying not to think about- and failing. You’re so sick of this. You have to say something. You remember Rose's advice, and it suddenly pushes you to blurt out:

“I’m sorry!!!” You say it out of nowhere, just loud enough for them to hear you. Dave stops, Karkat stops. They both turn over to look at you, and you slowly turn around to meet their eyes. “I’m sorry, okay?” You repeat.

“FOR WHAT?” Karkats the first to respond.

“What else?? For not including the song on the album!”

“dude, im not mad about the song.” Dave’s calmer than you expect when he replies.

“You’re not?”

“fuck no. we can release that shit whenever.”

“But.. then what…” You trail off. Karkat and Dave exchange a subtle glance. It’s really not an easy thing to explain to you. “Was it just the fight in general? I’m sorry I just stormed out and never said anything it was just-“

“yeah its not that either.”

“What??” It goes quiet again. You look very confused. Then you remember. Of course. “Oh. Is this about Rael?” You glance around a bit to make sure he’s not around when you ask this. The silence that follows tells you your answer.

You’re not really sure what to say, because you’re still not sure what exactly you have to be sorry about at first, regarding him. All you did was bring your boyfriend into your project. It made you happy. But you can think of one thing that maybe you crossed the line with.

“Okay well… I’m sorry then that I brought him into our song production. I shouldn’t have made you share that process with him. It was my mistake, really.” You’re looking at Dave the whole apology, so he knows you're being genuine. “Can we please just stop being so awkward around each other now? We can talk more later in private, if you want. I just hate having it be like this between us... So awkward, like you guys haven't seen me do a plethora of embarrassing things before, and vise versa. We're best friends, so why is our first instinct when we fight to ignore each other?” After a second, the two nod slightly in agreement.

“YEAH THIS IS FUCKING AWFUL. I HATE HAVING TO AVOID YOU IN OUR OWN HIVE. ITS SO WEIRD.”

“yeah this blows.”

“…So?” You wait for their response, mostly Dave’s, since he’s the one who has to accept the apology. You and Karkat both look at him.

“what? i just agreed that this is stupid.”

“So you'll forgive me? For now?”

“wait hold on. let me think about it. give me a second.” He says holding his hand out, and then bringing it to his chin to over-exaggerate his thinking. He takes a deep breath. “hm… yea i dont know im not convinced. how much AJ are you offering if i do?” He says in a way where you can obviously tell he's teasing, but it flys over Karkat's head.

"DAVE!" He elbows him, and Dave holds his side with a "what! i was joking!"

But then you're laughing, and they both turn to you curiously. It's the first time they've heard you laugh for a little while, and it puts you all at ease, making all the tension suddenly disappear. The other two smile slightly at you after a moment, and Dave joins in lightly chuckling with you. You beam, walking up to pull both of them into a hug. They’re both taken off guard at first, but then melt into it, hugging you back. You really needed this, and it was literally so easy to just talk to them that you feel stupid being so overdramatic about it this whole time.

“Thank you! I’m so glad you guys-“

“(Y/n)!!”

You turn to the sound of your name cutting you off. When you turn around, you see your boyfriend leaning out of the dining room doorway, waving you over. You nod and wave back, gesturing that you’re coming. You turn around a little sheepishly. “Sorry.. I should go see what he wants..”

“go ahead.”

“YEAH ITS FINE.”

“Thank you. I’ll talk to you guys later though, okay?” They both nod and you pull them into one last quick hug before quickly making your way over to the kitchen. They watch you go for a while, exchange a glance, and then turn to serve themselves some food.

It’s been over an hour and Karkat and Dave have been sitting on the couch on their phones for longer than probably acceptable at a social event. They’re leaning on each other, slumped, a sign that they haven’t moved for a while. There’s been no sight of you since you walked off earlier, which could be their fault. Still, they figured maybe you’d come find them. Finally, Dave leans back from his phone, his head pushing back onto Karkat’s arms, blocking his phone.

“yo i think im gonna go hit the bathroom and then grab a drink. you want anything?”

“NO IM FINE.”

“you sure? youre not thirsty?”

“YES STRIDER I ASSURE YOU IM NOT FUCKING LYING TO YOU ABOUT THE STATE OF MY HYDRATION.”

“aight. just checking. that shits important.” He responds, waiting for Karkats eye-roll in response before standing up and heading off.

On the way to the bathroom, Dave says hey to June and Jade and a couple other people. He forgot that there were actually a lot of people he knew here and not just random artists and whoever else Rose invited. The closer he gets to the bathroom, the less noisy his surroundings get, the chatter slightly fading to a muffle as Dave closes the door behind him into the hallway.

“jesus this place is a fucking maze.” He mumbles to himself, despite being alone. When he gets up to the bathroom door, he can hear a voice from inside. Figuring he’ll just wait until they’re out, he leans his back against the wall. Though it’s weird someone is talking in a one person bathroom? He ends up eavesdropping a little. That’s when he realizes the voice is familiar. It takes a few seconds and then… it’s Rael. He wasn’t going to think anything of it, just going back to minding his business, until he hears your name.

“Yeah (Y/n)’s party is going great! It’ll be announced soon and we’ll get to start the next project together. It’s all going hella smooth.” Dave doesn’t notice when he’s subconsciously leaning his ear to the wall for a better listen. “Dude what? Nah, it’s fine. When I break up with them, they’ll still have those two dorks they obviously like. I just need to get this part over with so I can start making bank. But it’ll be fun.” Dave’s eyes widen more with every word. There’s no way. He has to be imagining this. “Yeah, I’m good. I mean, like I said before, the other perks of the relationship aren’t bad either. You should’ve seen the way they-“

“no fucking way.” He mumbles to himself, and he feels sick listening to the rest. The anger and shock is so overwhelming, he’s not even sure what he should do right now. Should he confront the guy? Should he tell you? No, no way, it’d ruin your night. And would you even believe him?

Despite his burning urge to punch the shit out of your ‘boyfriend’ when he walks out, instead he starts speed walking back into the event room and to his previously designated couch. Karkat feels a sudden hand on his shoulder from behind the couch and a voice right in his ear “karkat!”

He jumps and swings around to face his boyfriend, his hand on his chest from shock. “JEGUS CHRIST DAVE YOU SCARED THE EVERLIVING FUCK OUT OF ME!!” He shouts.

“dude. you won’t believe the shit i just heard.” He says, ignoring the previous comment, his voice a little quieter than normal.

“WHAT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO THE BATHROOM?”

“yeah yeah i was. but (y/n)’s boyfriend was in there, and he..” Dave goes on to explain everything he heard.

Every word Dave continues with, Karkat’s face gets noticeably more pissed off. His eyes widen, his sharp teeth start to show more as his mouth opens in disbelief, he clenches his fists. “NO. FUCKING. WAY.”

“thats what i said.”

“YOURE KIDDING, RIGHT? YOU’VE GOT TO BE PULLING ONE OF YOUR DUMB IRONIC PRANKS ON ME RIGHT NOW.” He insists, despite knowing he must be telling the truth.

“no dude i would not joke about this. honestly i wish i were joking.”

It’s silent for a moment, and Dave just watches as Karkat seethes with rage, staring at nothing.

“so... what… do you think we should do?” He asks cautiously. But instead of saying anything, Karkat's standing up and darting off like he’s on a mission. Dave quickly tries to follow behind him, startled.

“wait. wait! karkat.” He shouts, catching up to him and grabbing his shoulder, making him stop.

“WHAT?!” He says, whipping around to face him.

“what are you doing??”

“GEE I WONDER. I’M GOING TO TELL THEM THAT THEIR BOYFRIEND IS A HUGE DOUCHEBAG!! WHAT THE HELL ELSE?!”

“you cant!” He replies immediately, and he’s not even sure where it came from, it was so automatic.

“WHY?!?!” 

“because!… i dont know. maybe its not the right time. cus yknow itd kinda suck if i got told my boyfriend was using me at a party im supposed to be enjoying and celebrating my success at and shit. right?” He explains, even a little unsure of his own words. Karkat takes a second to think about it, and it seems to resonate with him a little, but thinking about what the guy said again, his anger returns and he shakes the previous thought off.

“DAVE. WHO GIVES A FAT FLYING FUCK ABOUT TIMING!!" He argues, throwing his arms up to emphasize. "I GET HOW YOU FEEL, BUT IF I WERE THEM, I WOULD WANT TO KNOW. AND I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU’RE SO OVERPROTECTIVE WITH (Y/N) ANYWAYS. YOU SHOULD’VE TOLD THEM WHAT THEY SAID THAT NIGHT THEY WERE DRUNK TOO, BUT THEY STILL DON’T EVEN KNOW. DON’T THEY DESERVE TO KNOW IMPORTANT SHIT LIKE THIS??”

There’s a silence. He knows that Dave agrees, but he doesn’t understand why he’s being so careful anyways. “IM TELLING THEM.” And with that, he continues to stomp around looking for you, Dave somewhat anxiously following behind him.

They finally spot you from behind, talking to some people they’ve never seen before.

“(Y/N)!” Karkat shouts when he’s a few feet away from you, making everyone in the circle turn. When you turn around though, your face has a bit of a pink hue, and there’s an empty bottle in your hand. An alcohol bottle. Not only that, but when you see the two of them, your face immediately lights up and you smile that big, goofy, drunk smile. You stumble a little bit to meet them when they both stop in their tracks at the sight of you. Karkat reaches out to hold your arms, steadying you when you get to them.

“(Y/N)?? WHAT THE FUCK?! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING SOBER?!” He says and Dave nods, still in a bit of shock.

“Yeahhhh! I was! Butt yknoww Raelie said ‘ohhh come onnnnnnnn its ur night! u should be celebrating with booze!! dont be lame’ And I thought ok YEAH! I mean what’s one…. Or ah fwew drinks gonna make a big differance.. rhight?” You ramble, making big gestures as you speak. Both of their hearts sink as you talk, realizing what’s going on.

“he seriously peer pressured you into drinking again? even though he knew you were trying to stay sober?” Dave says, feeling disgusted at the thought of him again.

“Huh?? No i chouse to-”

“NO YOU IDIOT HE MADE YOU FEEL LAME FOR TRYING TO BE SOBER. THATS WHAT FUCKING PEER PRESSURE IS!! AM I REALLY HAVING TO EXPLAIN THIS SHIT TO YOU? ARE YOU A WRIGGER OR SOMETHING? DID YOU JUST HATCH??”

You frown. “I know what peer presure is!!! He didn’t preshure me!!” You shout back defensively.

“karkat chill. its not their fault.” Dave says, trying to calm him a little. Of course, those were not the best words he could’ve chosen.

“CHILL??? FUCK NO!! IM NOT GONNA SIT BACK AND WATCH MY BEST FRIEND GET ABSOLUTELY FUCKED OVER BY SOME DOUCHEY GARBAGE CAN IN A HUMAN FLESH SUIT. HE CAN SUCK MY GOUGING BONE BULDGE!! I DONT GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE.” He’s yelling louder than normal, and quite a few people have started to stare now. Dave looks around awkwardly. You are now confused and a little shocked at the sudden outburst.

“I’m sorry, I can do what now?” Comes a familiar voice from behind the two boys. They turn their heads to see Rael.

“YOU HEARD ME MOTHERFUCKER!! HOW DARE YOU WALK THE EARTH I CREATED JUST TO BE SUCH A FUCKING BULDGEWAD TO SOMEONE WHO ALSO FUCKING CREATED IT!!! I LOATHE WHATEVER KIND OF SORRY EXCUSE IS ABOUT TO COME OUT OF YOUR IGNORANCE TUNNEL AFTER THIS!” He shouts, pointing in his face, as Rael puts his hands up in defense- a little jokingly. Rael holds somewhat of a smug look on his face, faking surprise, which only pisses Karkat off more.

“Woah! Woah! Calm down, man!” He starts, moving past him with his hands still in the air, to be next to you. He places a hand on your back, and Dave has to hold Karkat back by the arm. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just trying to throw my partner a good album-release-dinner-party.”

Karkat shakes off Dave’s grasp to get up in his face again. “YOU DIDN’T THROW JACK SHIT. ROSE AND KANAYA PROBABLY PLANNED THIS ENTIRE THING THEMSELVES. AND YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL IM TALKING ABOUT YOU TWO-FACED BLITHERING FECULENT SHITHOLE!!” A few people in the crowd of people gasp at this, and Dave sighs, putting a hand up to shield his face slightly.

“What are you talking about?!” You finally shout back, extremely confused.

“(Y/N).” Karkat looks deep into your eyes, with a gaze more gentle than he was just staring up at your boyfriend with, placing both hands on your shoulders. Your eyes widen, and Rael stares down at you two blank-faced. “THIS GUY IS USING YOU FOR YOUR FAME. WE HEARD HIM SAY IT. WELL… DAVE HEARD HIM SAY IT.”

You glance over his shoulder at Dave, and he nods slightly, reassuring the statement. You go back to eye contact with Karkat, and he looks dead serious. “BREAK UP WITH HIM. TRUST ME ON THIS.” He tells you suddenly, and your eyes widen again, bigger this time.

“What?!” You say immediately, shocked, but Karkat keeps the same serious face. You want to trust him but…

You look up to your boyfriend, who’s not even looking at you, he’s making some kind of intense eye contact with Dave. “Rael… Whaht are they talking about?? You’re.. ushing me?” You mean to say as a firm question, but it also comes out a little nervous.

He turns to make eye contact with you, and for a half-second you can’t see any emotion in his face. Then he melts into a sweet loving tone “No, baby. Of course not.” He takes your cheek in one hand. “I would never do some lame shit like that. Why would I go through all that just for some clout?? I really don’t know what they’re saying.” You immediately feel comforted by this, but there’s still a doubtful gut feeling in you. Your mind is a little clouded from drinking, but you know you always trust your best friends. Why would they lie to you? They have never liked him though… But they still wouldn’t lie… Right?

Karkat, on the other hand, is about to go off the rails. “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW? I MEAN I KNOW YOU'RE A LIAR BUT COME THE FUCK ON?! WE HEARD YOU SAY IT.”

“Say what?” He says, turning to them, looking genuinely confused.

“that youre using them!” Dave cuts in suddenly, finally having enough of this conversation. “you said you were only working on the album for the fame and you were gonna break up with them! i heard your whole sleezy ass conversation in the bathroom. why would you even go to the bathroom to take a phonecall if it wasn’t for something you were trying to hide?”

Your heart pangs. Why are they so genuinely upset if Rael said they were wrong? Maybe it’s a misunderstanding?

“In the bathroom?? I was never talking to someone in the bathroom. And why would you even be trying to listen to my conversation if I was? That’s just weird." Dave opens his mouth to retort, but Rael cuts him off again. "But anyways, I’d never screw them over like that! You guys are making ridiculous assumptions!” He starts to get defensive now. It’s a really believable act, because you’re not sure who to believe at all. Although, you’re starting to lean towards Rael, despite your better judgment. Even if these two are actually telling the truth, then this party would just turn into a big scandal event and the next few months of your life will probably be hell again. You don’t want to believe it.

“seriously?!” Now Dave’s getting actually pissed, as he moves in closer to the rest of you. You can feel the heat rising.

“JUST TELL THE FUCKING TRUTH YOU FUCK. SERIOUSLY WE’RE GIVING YOU A FREE FUCKING PASS HERE.”

“I don’t know what the hell you two are talking about, I told you! I wouldn’t do stupid petty shit like that.”

“ARE YOU SURE?? BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO ME TO BE RIGHT UP YOUR DAMN DECEIVING ASS ALLEY.”

“I’m sorry, do you two have any kind of proof of anything? Because this is a lot to be accusing someone of suddenly. Is this a publicity stunt?”

“what?? no-“

“WHY WOULD WE NEED PROOF? WE’RE (Y/N)’S CLOSEST FRIENDS WHY WOULD WE HAVE TO LIE?! YOU'RE THE ONE DOING THE PUBLICITY STUNT WITH THEM!!”

So many people are looking right now. You start to hear whispers. Glancing around, luckily you don’t see anyone recording, but you start to remember the articles again, and you’re getting more anxious by the second.

“HEY. IVE GOT AN IDEA. HOW ABOUT INSTEAD OF DEALING THIS USELESS BACK AND FORTH WITH THIS FILTH SPEWING TAINT-LICKER, WE JUST FUCKING DROP HIM ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DAMN PLANET OR SOMETHING!!! THEN MAYBE HE’D STOP FUCKING UP OUR LIVES!!”

“ALRIGHT!!!” You shout, matching Karkat’s volume, immediately silencing him and making them all turn to you. You look around again anxiously before you continue, lowering your tone now. “Look. I don’t know what the hellss gotten into you two toniight but this is reaaally REALLY annoying and ridiculous!!! Ok!! I get yew dount like him!! Fine!! I know it everyday becushe you make it super obvuouhs always!!!! But can you not make the dinner party a huge fugcking scene! This ise embarrassing!!” You all hold eye contact for a few beats. You’re breathing heavy from the sudden outburst, and now some people are starting to try to pretend like they aren’t looking, to your slight relief. Then, you spot Kanaya and Rose looking over at you with concern. You look to them, and then the bottle in your hand, and suddenly you’re very embarrassed. The anxiety continues to build.

“(y/n)… do you not believe us?” Dave’s the first one to break the silence. The two of you now hold an intense stare now. Your eyebrows are furrowed, but they slowly lift as your expression softens. “I!… I don’t know. All I knouw is thaat you two have neever been supportive of us!! So… Ok yeah maybe itss kinda haurd to believe you now!” You cross your arms.

When you look at Karkat, your heart sinks again. He’s looking at you with hurt and disappointment. You don’t think he’s ever looked at you that way, not even when you had the addiction. Though you suppose you started that again as well. You feel more guilty. “I… I can’t do this right now.. Can we just talk about this later?” You say, tone suddenly much sadder from before.

Karkats expression phases back into an angry one again. “NO. NO YOU KNOW WHAT? ITS FINE. THERES NOTHING ELSE TO TALK ABOUT IF YOU DON’T EVEN WANT TO TRY TO BELIEVE A WORD WE’RE FUCKING SAYING. DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT THEN. FUCK ME FOR LOOKING OUT FOR YOUR WELL BEING!!.” He shouts and turns, starting to walk away from you.

Your eyes begin to water, but for some reason you're getting angry at the same time. “WELL… FINE. I WILL THEN! I NEVER ASKED YOU TO DO ANYTHING FOR ME ANYWAYS!! ALL I WANTED WAS YOUR SUPPORT!!” And you don’t even let them respond before you dart off behind you into a crowd of people.

Only Dave watches you go, and Karkat stops and stares at the ground with his arms crossed. He also can’t decide whether to be sad or angry, but angry is easier for him to show.

Rael continues to stare at them after you leave, keeping his place. The two boys both look over to him when they notice he’s still there.

“what the fuck are you still standing here for??” Dave snaps at him, exhausted.

Rael looks around to make sure no one was watching anymore, and they weren’t. In fact, most started to walk in the direction you ran off in, since the drama might presumably follow you. He then flags down one of his buddies and whispers to him to start the announcement. Dave and Karkat watch in confusion as the other guy runs off and Rael turns to make eye contact with them again. He’s smiling now.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SO SMILEY ABOUT, ASSHOLE?!”

“Haha! You guys are a damn riot, I’ll give you that. (Y/n) sure knows how to pick em.” He says giddily, suddenly changing demeanor so drastically.

“whatever dude.“ Dave comments flatly, not wanting to keep talking to this asshole.

“Hey, you got me, alright? I’ll admit it.” He runs a hand through his hair. “But it doesn’t matter anyways-”

“WHAT?!” ”what?!” They say in unison.

On the speakers a little further into the room, an announcement starts being made.

              [Hey everyone! Thanks so much for coming out to celebrate (Y/n)’s Third album release! There’s a few things we want to-]

“Yeah, look, they’re not gonna believe you. It’s too fucking wild of an assumption. Because really, why would someone go through all that for fame?”

“YEAH THATS EXACTLY WHAT IM WONDERING. YOU’D HAVE TO BE A REAL FUCKING DICKHEAD.” Karkat snaps back sarcastically.

              [-If you discussed any possible offers for (Y/n) tonight please make sure one of their managers has your contact information as well as-]

“Exactly. But I’m not like everyone. I’ll do anything to achieve my what I wan-“

“OH MY GOD PLEASE SHUT THE EVERLOVING FUCK UP.” Karkat groans, cutting off what sounded to be the start of a cringy self determination speech.

Rael laughs again. It rumbles over the announcement that continues to overlap their conversation. “Alright alright. I know you guys are sick of me now. But hey, think of it like this-"

              [-I mean truly, we're all so proud of the success that has continued to skyrocket from this long-awaited release, and there's sure to just be more great works on the way-]

"-You can have (Y/n) after the tour now, so it's not all that bad for you guys. Since you’re so obsessed with each other, I’m sure that’s what you wanted!”

“WHAT?!” They both say again in unison.

“Oh, I’m sorry did you not notice yourselves yet? Even if I did actually like (Y/n), which I almost did in the beginning by the way, how could I not see the obvious tension between you three? It would be impossibly awkward to be around you together all the time, and I can never seem to get them away from you either. You’re all they ever talk about for gods sake.” Rael even chuckles a little at the thought of it, clearly not even that bothered by it, just amused.

Dave and Karkat side eye each other for a few moments, trying to read each other’s expression about this accusation, and feeling slightly more guilty about the situation now than before. Were they really preventing you from having a relationship, even if this guy hadn't turned out to be a douchebag?

Then something clicks in Dave’s head. “hold on… did you say tour?” He asks suddenly, and Karkat looks at him confused as it starts to click for him too.

Raels smiles again at this, and he starts walking backwards towards where the announcement is being made. “Well. Maybe I’ll catch you guys later!” He shouts nicely.

“GET BACK HERE YOU FUCK!! YOUR PLAN ISN’T EVEN GOOD PEOPLE ARE JUST GONNA FUCKING HATE YOU AFTER!! YOU’RE A BUMBLING IMBECILE!!!” Karkat shouts after him, but he only laughs as he turns around and disappears from sight again.

“hey, it’s fine. i got that all on recording.” Dave says calmly, holding up his phone that still continues to take a video, and holding Karkat from going after him with his other arm. 

“WHAT? REALLY?”

“yeah. he was talking all that shit earlier about having no proof. but they have to believe us now, right?”

              [But anyways, enough of me! We’d like to tell you all some big news that we’ve finally made official! And I’ll pass the mic over to Rael so he can share it with you all!]

Karkat and Dave turn toward the speakers. There’s a lot of people gathered around a small platform where Rael's friend was just making the announcements. They can barely see over the amount of people, but then Dave spots your face as you walk up and stand behind Rael. There’s no readable emotion on your face.

              [R: Thank you all! Really! This has been such a great event. And I want to especially thank the lovely Rose Lalonde and Kanaya Maryam for knowing how to throw together such a great dinner party on such short notice!] 

Karkat rolls his eyes and huffs.

              [R: Now I’m sure you’re all curious what this big announcement is!]

Everyone cheers and claps a bit as confirmation.

              [R: Well… It took a lot of string pulling and quick planning, but (Y/n) and I are proud to announce, we’ve decided to go on a world tour!!]

Gasps and applause ring throughout the room. Karkat and Dave’s face change to a look of absolute horror. He wasn’t bluffing.

              [R: This will be (Y/n)’s second ever tour, and I’ll be accompanying them on stage! Please come and show support if you’d like to! Everyone here will revive a free ticket so-]

Karkat suddenly feels sick as he turns away from the stage, covering his mouth. This was a nightmare. A world tour. You’d be gone for such a long time again.

Dave puts his arms around Karkat to support him, and he looks over his shoulder to search for your face again above the crowd. When he does, you both make eye contact at the same time. Your slight smile immediately turns into a frown, and you're the first to look away again, almost shamefully.

You were going to tell them before it was announced, but everything happened so fast. You knew they’d be upset if they didn’t hear it from you.

Dave frowns and turns to walk towards the door with Karkat. Tonight was a lot, so maybe it’d be better to just go home.

But there’s no reassurance or making up afterwards this time.

They go home, but you don’t follow.

You don’t come home that night. Or the next night.

—————————————————————

The house’s atmosphere is intensely gloomy. The two boys can barely talk about anything other than what happened that night. Pent up anger they can’t express to you, since you won’t come home or answer your phone, ends up coming out at each other sometimes. They start fighting about small stupid things, and the arguments always eventually turns into something along the lines of “WHEN THE HELL IS (Y/N) JUST GONNA COME HOME ALREADY?”

When three days pass since the party, the anger dies down a little and worry starts to take its place. Calls are made to a handful of other friends asking if they’ve heard from you. No one says they have until they talk with Rose, who says you had come over briefly the day prior to thank them for the party.

At least they knew you were okay. But now they know you’re definitely ignoring them.

From your point of view, you had been spending the nights at Rael’s place, and your unsureness of the situation also caused you to be quite cranky. You tend to snap at Rael a lot, which causes him to just leave you alone most of the time. He goes out a lot as well, so you’re usually by yourself.

But you miss them.

You want to go home. But you’re too exhausted to want to deal with this, especially right before tour. You don’t even know what you’d say to them. You’re upset at them, but you feel bad at the same time, because you know they’re upset at you as well. Plus you can't stop beating yourself up about the relapse. You broke a promise to your friends, but more importantly, yourself.

You unlock your phone and go to look at Dave’s text messages to you for the hundredth time.

Tuesday 1:34pm     Dave™️💿: yo can you at least tell us where you are    Dave™️💿: and that youre like safe and not dead maybe? Tuesday 3:53pm    Dave™️💿: i mean i doubt that something heroic or just happened for you to actually be dead    Dave™️💿: but you never know    Dave™️💿: maybe you decided to push an old lady out of the way of a big truck headed straight for her because you realized shes blind and couldnt see it coming    Dave™️💿: or because maybe she just had like    Dave™️💿: really ass peripheral vision or some shit    Dave™️💿: you just fly in like superman and    Dave™️💿: wait fuck we can fly i always forget we can fly    Dave™️💿: yeah i guess that wouldnt happen since you could just fly away with her instead of pushing her out of the way which would probably still put her in the hospital anyways    Dave™️💿: but you get my point    Dave™️💿:  like i doubt something like that happened but itd be nice to be reassured Tuesday 8:20pm    Dave™️💿: karkats still super pissed off im ngl but im willing to talk about it if you want to    Dave™️💿: plus i have something you really need to see    Dave™️💿: but i dont want to send it to you cus i dont know where you are or where your heads at right now    Dave™️💿: ok ill stop spamming you but seriously text me asap    Dave™️💿: its like the damn twilight zone up in here

And that’s just from today.

You sigh. It’s really hard to stay away from them like this. You remember what Rose said that night, and you know you should really talk to them.

Rael walks into the room, looking dressed to go out.

“Hey.” You greet, melancholy. “Where are you going? Don’t we start practicing tomorrow? The tour is really last minute so we'll probably be rehearsing all day.”

“Yeah I’m just going to this party my friends invited me to. It’ll be fine.” He says, fixing his hair in the mirror.

“Again? Do you always go to parties this often when you’re not with me?”

“Yeah, why? Is it a problem?”

The attitude in his voice makes you feel sad, but you shake your head. “No.. I just didn’t know.. Sorry.” You respond and go back to your phone, not wanting to make a big deal. You're already exhausted.

He walks over to you and places a kiss on the top of your head, which permits a range of conflicted emotions inside you. “It’s alright babe. I’ll be back before midnight, okay?” You nod and he grabs his coat before leaving the room.

You stay staring at your homescreen as you hear the front door close. Your finger lingers over the 'phonecalls' application for a while. You reluctantly press it.

There’s still a ton of missed calls from Dave, and a few from some others. You linger again over the call back button next to Daves contact name, biting your lip. After what feels like a couple minutes, you press it, but the second it starts ringing you hang up again.

You grip the phone tightly, and then toss it to the end of the bed with a loud groan, falling back onto the pillow behind you. This is annoying.

Suddenly you hear a vibration, and you body shoots up to look at your phone a few feet away from you, but it’s off. Looking around curiously, you spot another phone on the dresser. It’s Rael’s. He forgot it.

You crawl over, hovering over the screen to read a name you don’t recognize. Eventually it stops ringing, and the screen fades to the lockscreen photo of Rael performing during your tour. You slowly take the phone in your hand, swiping up on the screen to the passcode input. You look cautiously around the room even though you know you're the only one here. You know his password. You saw him put it in once and laughed at how stupid it was, but maybe he changed it after? Only one way to find out…

No.

You stop put the phone down, scolding yourself for even thinking about snooping through your boyfriends phone. Why would you need to do that? You trust him, right? You trusted him that night so...

…

It’s not like he should have anything to hide…

Yeah. There’s nothing suspicious that should be there, so what’s the harm in looking? He wouldn’t mind.

You quickly pick up the phone again, rapidly sliding up and typing ‘6969’, the screen making a click sound and opening to yet another homescreen photo of him. You immediately go for the texts app, scanning the messages. You don’t find anything weird though, everything seems normal to you.

Of course.

You click on the photos app. Nothing weird here either. Screenshots of random things, photos of random things, a few photos of you two, and tons of selfies.

Okay…

You click the phonecalls app now, scanning through the recent calls. There’s not anything strange here of course, since it’s not like you would recognize any of these names. However, there is one number that isn’t registered as a contact. You’d brush it off as a spam call, but it was ongoing for almost 20 minutes. Then you notice it was the day of the party, and it was an outgoing call. Why would he call an unknown number and talk for 20 minutes with them? On the same day Dave and Karkat accused him of saying those things on call in the bathroom…

You can’t be sure.. but it is the only call made that day.. so what if..

You hear the front door unlock and open, and you immediately snap out of your daze you got caught up in. Hearing the footsteps down the hall start to get closer, you quickly throw the phone back on the dresser and try to sit natural like you weren’t just snooping through his history.

“Hey babe I think I forgot my-“ He stops in the doorway, raising an eyebrow at your weirdly composed position with your phone sitting at the foot of the bed. “Uh.. Phone.”

“Oh really? How’d you manage to do that?” You smile, which is out of character for you the past few days.

“What are you doing?”

“Huh? Oh nothing, I was just thinking about stuff..." Your eyes drag over to the television. "Like what I should watch on the TV! There’s.. so many channels.... ha.”

“Okay…” He gives you a weird look, and then glances over to spot his phone. “Ah! There it is. Alright I’ll see you later.” He grabs it and immediately starts doing something on it as he leaves the room again. Luckily he doesn’t seem to suspect anything.

“Okay! Bye!” You shout to him and you hear the front door open and close again. You let out a sigh of relief.

…

Your phone starts to ring, surprising you again. You look over.

It’s Dave.

—————————————————————

Tuesday 8:21pm.

Dave is chilling on the couch after just sending you todays ‘last text’, even though he knows he’ll definitely text you again tomorrow if you still don’t respond. Karkat sits on the other side of the couch, with one hand in his hair probably squeezing the color out of it, and the other tapping away on the down arrow of his laptop (husk-top). Really, he could not be hitting the button any harder. It’s practically ringing throughout the whole house.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

“dude. take it easy on the keys. i can hear them begging you for mercy at this point.” Dave comments, staring over at him. Karkat hasn’t spoken a word since yesterday. Which is honestly impressive, but it is starting to scare his boyfriend at this point. He just turns to make eye contact with Dave, looking just as pissed off as he has since they got home, and continuing to hit the keys like he’s trying to break them. Then he goes back to whatever he’s looking at.

“ok. cool. forget i said anything i guess.” He says passive aggressively, but also at this point he can’t seem to care anymore. He goes back to looking at his phone.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK-

“AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!” Karkat finally shouts out in aggravation, grabbing his face and throwing his head back, making Dave jump in his seat. “AAAAUUUGHGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!” And then he throws his laptop (HUSKTOP.) across the room. Wow.

“wow.”

“GIVE ME YOUR PHONE.”

“what? why?”

“BECAUSE IM CALLING (Y/N).” He says and he starts to reach over for Daves phone.

He pulls his arm back to hold it out of reach. “i already did today and they wont answer. why dont you just call on your phone?”

“THEY WONT ANSWER IF ITS ME IM THE ONE WHO CUSSED THEIR BOYFRIEND OUT.”

“ok well if you havent noticed, theyre not answering me either so were both shit out of luck right about now. hate to break it to you.”

“JUST GIVE IT TO ME!!” He shouts hysterically, starting to climb over him to grab the phone.

“dude calm down!!” Dave shouts back, startled, holding the phone up over his head now.

Kartkat continues to fight for the phone, and Dave continues to move further to keep it out of his reach. Eventually, Dave ends up sitting up on the couch and just holding it to his chest, buried in his arms to shield it from grabbing. Karkat gets on his lap and tries to grasp for it, but then Dave suddenly puts his arms around him, locking Karkats arms to the side of his body. Karkat squirms around in this position with all his might.

“LET GO OF ME STRIDER!!!! LET GO NOW OR I SWEAR!!!”

“nope! were staying like this until you chill the FUCK out.”

“THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE STATE OF HOW ‘CHILL’ I AM!! I NEED TO TALK TO THEM!!!”

“no shit we both do!! but they wont answer!!! you know they wont!” Dave protests, still keeping a tight hold on Karkat, his head tucked into his side as well.

Kakat’s struggling starts to get weaker and weaker after Dave says this, until finally he relaxes, letting himself drop his weight down and his head fall onto Daves shoulder. Dave lets out a subtle sigh of relief. 

“theyll call when theyre ready dude. itll be fine.”

It’s quiet for a while as they both stay in this position, breathing a little heavy in the beginning from all the struggling, and then calming down.

“man. they cant go on another tour. or at least not without talking to us.”

There’s more silence as Karkat just lays dead still on his shoulder. Dave clicks on his phone to check for a notification, to which there’s still just a blank screen. He sighs. The air stays still and calm like this. He starts to lightly rub Karkats back after a while, comforting him silently. Karkat begins to purr after a couple minutes of this, to his further relief.

“you okay?” Dave asks, breaking the silence as he moves his head a little to try to see his face.

“…YEAH.” He responds in a tired sounding tone, not moving at all. “SORRY.”

“its cool.”

…

“do you miss them?” He asks, and even he thinks it comes out a little strange after it’s left his mouth. When there’s no response, he tries again to get a look at his face.

“hey.” Dave says, shaking him slightly to try to get him to sit up. “look at me.” Karkat reluctantly raises his head a little to face him.

“WHAT D-“ Dave cuts off whatever he might’ve said by pulling him into a kiss. It shocks him, but he doesn’t pull away at all, and eventually he’s kissing back. He starts purring again. When Dave pulls back, he’s got a sweet smile on his face, and Karkat is blushing intensely, his bright red blood always making it so noticeable.

“WHAT WAS THAT FOR…” He asks a little sheepishly.

“what? a guy cant just kiss his boyfriend? are you homophobic?”

“NO! I MEAN-”

“thats fucked up karkat. to be homophobic in this day and age. honestly. you should be ashamed.”

“OH JUST SHUT UP ALREADY.” He crosses his arms, and looks away, still flustered. Dave laughs a little, and then leans back onto the couch, closing his eyes.

“things have just gotten so intense. i think we need to chill.”

“…YEAH…” Karkat looks back over and stares at him for a little longer, blush still lingering, and then eventually leans forward to lay against his chest.

There’s another long pause. Karkat sighs.

“I JUST…” He starts, but is still seeming to try to find the right words. “I JUST DONT WANT THEM DATING THAT ASSHOLE ANYMORE. AFTER WHAT HAPPENED. I DONT CARE IF THEY WANT TO GO ON TOUR OR WHATEVER. WHO ARE WE TO STOP THEM IF THATS WHAT THEY REALLY WANT? BUT WE KNOW THIS SHIT IS ALL HIS IDEA. HE WANTS TO GO ON THAT TOUR SO HE CAN GET ALL THE PUBLICITY AND MONEY AND THEN HE’S GOING TO LEAVE THEM.”

“i know..” Dave frowns as he starts to rub Karkats back again. “but theyll definitely talk to us before they leave. theres no way they wouldnt.”

“BUT HOW DO WE KNOW THEY WONT STILL GO?”

“well they might. but i mean they have to at least believe us about him? ive got the video.”

“I DONT KNOW. THEY SEEMED SO FUCKING HELLBENT BEFORE ON NOT BELIEVING US. EVEN IF THEY WERE DRUNK.” He sneers, still bitter about the way you doubted them that night.

Dave is silent for another minute before he speaks again.

“you remember what the douche said to us right before he made that announcement about the tour?”

“HE SAID A LOT OF IDIOTIC BULLSHIT BEFORE THE ANNOUNCEMENT.” Karkat responds.

“yeah but i mean when he was saying that stuff about uh..” He pauses out of awkwardness of what he wanted to say next, not even sure if he should bring it up right now. “like.. that we should date them or whatever? he said we must have a thing for them.. but thats...”

He waits for Karkat to finish his sentence, thinking maybe he could get his opinion without having to directly ask. To no avail, however.

“THAT’S WHAT?”

“i dont know…” He blushes a little, turning his head to stare at the wall. “what did you think when he said that?”

“I THOUGHT… THAT THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE.”

“oh.. yeah? why impossible?”

“I MEAN WERE BOTH ALREADY IN A MATESPRITSHIP. TO ALSO BE IN A ROMANTIC QUADRANT WITH THEM IT’D HAVE TO BE BLACK ROMANCE. AND I FEEL FAR FROM BLACK FEELINGS FOR THEM SO...”

“i mean yeah. but are matespritships always with two people for trolls?”

“OF COURSE? THE ONLY QUADRANT INVOLVING MORE THAN ONE PERSON IS AUSPISTICISM USUALLY, UNLESS YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR MORE THAN ONE PERSON FOR ONE QUADRANT BUT…”

“..but?”

“BUT THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING. YOU USUALLY ONLY HAVE ONE PERSON IN ANYTHING OTHER THAN AUSPISTICISM. I MEAN IVE NEVER HEARD OF MORE THAN TWO TROLLS IN ANY OTHER QUADRANT…” This thought seems to have him pondering hard about whether that would be sustainable. He had never considered it before, and surprisingly it had never been in any of his RomComs. He sits up a little to look at Dave, who turns his head to meet his gaze again. “DO HUMANS HAVE MORE THAN TWO PEOPLE IN YOUR ONLY QUADRANT?”

“i mean im probably like the last person to ask. hell if i know anything about human relationships, obviously i was never in one. but yeah im pretty sure people did that. polyamorous and like… quad.. amorous? i guess? no wait that doesnt sound right.” Dave now is pondering what the fuck a four way relationship is called, not to mention five, six, seven…

“DAVE. WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY?”

He snaps out of his thoughts. “huh? nothing.”

“NOTHING...” He's not convinced.

“i mean i was just thinking like… its weird that hes not the only person to have said something like that right? rose and kanaya asked us before and it made us super awkward. june and roxy asked me once.. dirk mentioned it but not even as a question he was just like ‘your two partners blah blah blah’ which totally threw me off? plus we never even talked about when they confessed to us that one night. we both know they have feelings for us but we never talked about how we feel about it. whats up with that?”

Karkat takes a moment to consider all of this. To be quite honest he hasn’t really thought about this subject in a lot of detail, but it is a little troubling. With everything happening lately, he's been realizing he's always felt for you the same he's things he's felt for Dave. You both meant a lot to him, and he cared for you both in the same way. 

“THERES NOTHING ‘UP’ WITH IT, WE JUST HAVEN’T HAD TIME TO TALK ABOUT IT.”

“dude. we have literally nothing but time, all the time.”

“OKAY! FINE. LETS TALK ABOUT IT THEN.”

“okay.”

…

…

…

The silence is deafening.

“WELL?”

“what”

“YOU SAID YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!”

“okay yeah but-“

“THEN HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT (Y/N)? DO YOU HAVE FLUSHED FEELINGS FOR THEM? OR ARE THEY STRICTLY PALE?” Karkat suddenly asks bluntly.

Dave's pokerfaced for a beat, like he’s loading. “…how... do you feel about them?”

“MOTHERFUCKER I ASKED YOU FIRST!”

“yeah but! if i feel one way about them and you dont then thats kinda awkward… and its gonna be a problem later on right?.”

“FOR FUCKS SAKE.” He rolls his eyes. “FINE I…” He stops, starting to think hard again. He knows how he feels, but at the same time he's not sure. Having feelings for two people at once, like he said, is usually not seen as a good thing. It's normally conflicting and problematic. Granted, it's usually not a good thing for humans either. They're both struggling with the concept of polyamory.

“I… I DONT KNOW.”

“you dont know?”

“IVE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT OKAY!!”

“really. youve never thought about being in a relationship with (y/n)? like all of three us?”

“HAVE YOU?”

Dave purses his lips for a moment, thinking hard trying decide if he should just come out and say it. 

“yeah. ive thought about it honestly.” 

“OH.”

Karkat's short response suddenly makes Dave a little anxious, and he sits up a bit to get closer to him and make eye contact. “oh shit but you really havent?? fuck... im sorry i just meant because we all live together i just sometimes think ‘we all might as well just fuckin date with like how much we sit around together all day and-’ man im sorry-“

“ITS FINE DAVE I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS A BAD IDEA. RELAX YOU DIDN'T HURT MY PRECIOUS FEELINGS.”

“oh. right. okay.”

“I JUST MEANT THAT I NEVER… I MEAN I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO…” He groans at how much he struggles with talking about how he feels about this. “I THINK IVE ALWAYS HAD SOME TYPE OF RED FEELINGS… FOR BOTH OF YOU. BUT WHEN (Y/N) WAS GONE AND WE GOT CLOSER... IT JUST ENDED UP LIKE..”

“oh.”

“SORRY NO I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT.. I MEAN.. WELL OKAY ITS JUST-“

“its cool i get it.”

"YOU DO?"

"yeah of course."

Insert awkward pause of silence.

“so… we both feel the same way about them?”

“I GUESS SO?" He gives a troubled look. "BUT WOULD A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THAT REALLY WORK?”

“i dont fuckin know. but im sure we could figure out a way. weve already lived together this long.”

“YEAH. THATS TRUE.”

Dave chuckles a little. “fucked up that raels the motherfucker that made us finally talk about this shit.”

Karkat snickers back at this. “YEAH ITS THE ONLY THING HES BEEN GOOD FOR AT THIS FUCKIN POINT.”

They laugh for a bit before letting out a sigh of relief, all this finally being off their shoulders. Feels like a huge weight is gone.

“god. we really need to fuckin talk to them now.”

“YEAH NO SHIT.”

Dave picks up his phone from the couch, going into his contacts yet again to click on your name. He puts it on speaker.

It rings…

And rings…

And rings….

No response.

The phone goes to voicemail and Dave hangs up again.

“GOD FUCKING DAMNIT (Y/N). PICK UP THE PHONE!!”

And then, as if replying to him, the phone lights up with a text notification.

[ 1 New Message Notification:    (y/n): ill be over in 5.]

The curtain closes again on Chapter 2, bringing it to a cliff-hanging END.

There are curtains this time. Imagine them. You’re imagining them, and they are closing.

See you soon for the finale!

[an-isolated-lifeboat]

Taming Paper Chaos

Something I think comes with being home more is you wind up seeing your mess more and that takes a toll when it is literally your only place to be. One thing that I struggled with for years that I finally have seemed to turn a corner on is paper clutter. While I have most things on paperless, there’s always still papers that I need to organize, whether because I have to keep a hard copy or those things that just don’t have paperless options. 

Note: If you don’t have your own place, I have options for bedroom and backpack options further down.

My System

I looked at A LOT of paper organization systems over the years and the one I’ve settled on is mostly inspired by the Minimal Mom on YouTube. One main difference is I have to keep my action items visual or I will absolutely forget them. 

I also don’t have “long term files” the way she does. I’m not sure why but it’s not really been relevant in my life. Perhaps because I don’t have kids and am not likely to be able to own a house.

A note - do not put this in your ideal place. Put this where people are dumping all their papers anyways. That’s usually going to be a flat surface, so try to find or make a vertical one right near it. 

With that in mind, here is my system. 

Pretty underwhelming right? But let’s talk about the components. The most visual part are my action items which I clip to the front of the fridge. All items get tagged with the task associated with them. This is...so key. Before I’d clip things up and it felt like it would take forever to deal with so I avoided them. Now I realize most paper items really only require one or two tasks at most to deal with and I’m keep the executive functioning of deciding what to do separate from the executive functioning of deciding when to do it. 

I also don’t fuck with due dates anymore. I just date them with the date they went up on the fridge so I can see how much time has elapsed. As you can see, this one has become a stuck task. I don’t feel too guilty about it because I know I’m working through the wall of awful around it and I’ll get to it when I can. I clear most things by the end of the week they go up. Anything that stays longer than a month - probably a stuck task. 

My items get clipped to the right side of the fridge and get green post it notes and my partner’s get clipped to the left side and get purple post it notes. That way it’s very easy to see who has what task and I don’t feel like I need to nag because it’s very clear, that’s hers and it’s her decision how to handle it. I don’t need to worry about it. 

I also use the post it notes to request her to do non routine tasks I need her to do (lifting things so I don’t throw out my back, maintenance she’s qualified to do but I’m not, etc). It cuts down on nagging because she sees it when she sees it and can decide to do it whenever she feels like it. She generally prefers to texts her requests of me which I’m fine with. 

Next is the time will tell bin. Coupons you’re not sure you’re gonna use - they go here. Catalogs you might order from - also go here. Can’t think of the next steps with an item but you figure you probably shouldn’t throw it out - put it here. 

The idea with this bin is that is that you go through it every so often, either as if gets full or at regularly scheduled intervals. You see what’s expired, what’s out of season, what’s no longer important to you and you toss those things out. At some point you’ll get tired of seeing something every time you go through it and probably toss it. Or you won’t and it’s fine because it’s contained in this little bin. 

The rule with this bin though is that you can only keep what fits in this bin. If it’s piled up to the point where it’s falling out on the sides, you gotta find something that’s less interesting or relevant to you to get rid of. 

Last is the important documents folder. This is for ID documents, legal documents, taxes, housing information like current and past leases, etc. This one was supposed to be very bright green so it would be easy to spot and direct people to in an emergency buuut the seller did not send what was pictured and I’m making do with this until I can swap it out. I sit it under the time will tell bin so it’s easy to file things when I’m sorting mail. 

If you only have a room...

If you’re in a dorm, living with roommates, or staying with family, you probably don’t have a big fridge to use to clip up action items. You could swap it for something like a bulletin board but I’m partial to wall grids like this and bulldog clips. You can attach them with removeable wall hooks so they’re very dorm/renter friendly. If you’re short on space you can even put one up on the back of a door. 

I still think it’s important to tag the paper items with the task associated with them and the date you put it up. Some grids have options for bins for pens and the like which would accommodate some post it notes as well, that way you can keep them close at hand. 

That takes care of your action items and the rest can stay the same. Find a spot on a shelf for your time will tell bin and important document folder. Set a reminder to go through it as often as you’d like to if it’s some place you will not easily see it fill up. 

If you’re very mobile...

If you’re very mobile, whether that’s for work or you don’t have a stable living situation or perhaps you’re young and you’re going between the houses of parents who’ve separated each week, you still have options. 

For your action items, I recommend a clear pocket folder with a zip so things don’t get lost and you can clearly see when it has items in it. I’d recommend putting the most urgent item at the front so it stays top of mind. You can keep some post its and a pen in the folder itself and make a rule to tag things with their action before you put it in the folder. 

For your time will tell bin, I’d probably use an opaque pocket folder with a zip. I don’t need to see what’s in it. If I need it, I’ll go looking for it and I’ll clear through it at least once a month anyways. If you get catalogs occasionally, it should be big enough to accommodate those - one of the main things that gets stuck in my time will tell bin especially in spring. It does mean you’ll have less space than a bin so you’ll probably have to churn through it quicker. 

You could also opt for a small accordion folder that isn’t brightly colored - to contrast with your important docs folder. I’d personally worry that that’d make me feel like I needed to sort things into categories which would slow me down and overwhelm me so I probably wouldn’t opt for that. But if that works better for you, go for it! 

And your important documents folder once again would stay the same - brightly colored accordion folder with tabs for personal ID docs, taxes, health records, etc. 

Since these are less visual, it’s extra important to set a reminder on your phone or calendar to nudge you to check them. I’d check the action folder at least once a week and I’d check the the time will tell bin whenever it starts getting full or monthly. Ideally whenever you’re setting up at a place, I’d keep them in a visual place, but I also get sometimes you’re moving literally everyday and that might be a hassle. Use your judgment. 

If you’ve got a backpack with a laptop pocket, consider getting a laptop sleeve for your computer and using the pocket for keeping your paper system in place. Keep it and your planner or bullet journal all in one place and you’ll always know where to look or in an emergency, where to direct people to. 

Flow

You have a document that you know isn’t trash. 

Is it important?

>>> If yes, is it urgent/requires action?

>>>>>> If yes, tag it with an action and today’s date. Put with action items.

>>>>>>If no, file in important documents folder.

>>> If no or I don’t know, put in time will tell bin. 

What About...

...school work?

Personally, depending on the amount of paper I’m getting from school, I’d probably just file it according to this system. Tag action items. Time will tell. Important docs - maybe a section for syllabi. I’d also probably use it mostly as an intermediary - digitize what needs digitized, get tasks into my task system (bullet journal; collections). 

But it really depends on what kind of school work you’re doing as to whether that would work. If you’re doing courses that are very paper heavy, an additional system for that work specifically might be needed. 

…receipts, more extensive financial files?

That is not my bag. I avoid that shit like the plague. Check out this video for mid and long term filing options. 

If you’re dealing with someone’s affairs after they’ve passed away, I highly recommend making a separate system (action, time will tell, important docs) for those items as they’re draining to see mixed in with your day to day items. Consider setting up a system like I describe for people who are very mobile and keeping it near by your main system so it’s easy put things where they need to go but you don’t have to look at it all the time. 

...children’s art work?

Memory boxes are great, for you and for kids. Check out this video. 

...schedules, papers I need to reference?

Tag schedules with a post it reminder to put the dates in your calendar, then toss (or scan and toss). For information you need to reference, use a scanner app on your phone to digitize it and attach to a calendar item if relevant or file with digital references. 

[jinxedjaz]

✨ some of MY OPINIONS on HOSAB ✨

SPOILERS AHEAD

• First of all, there’s just WAYYY too much going on. It felt a little too ambitious at times. too many plots, subplots and characters

• Bryce isn’t particularly likeable to me, she feels arrogant, selfish and refuses to take criticism or advice from others even when it’s valid. It’s her way or the high way. She’ll decide to do something and nothing anyone else says will sway her opinion, even when it’s clear to others and to the reader it’s a bad decision

• The others thinking Bryce could rule the fae at this point doesn’t make sense. She has no royal or strategic training, doesn’t think plans through, makes decisions mainly based on what she wants and the only moments I could see her fully taking charge was when the others compared her to her father. Someone who she claims she’s nothing alike/ wants nothing to do with yet uses his name and position to get her way, and cry’s ignorance once she has to deal with the consequences for her actions. She could get there someday, but I don’t think she’s ready for that comparison yet

• Cormac was a completely wasted character, he had so much potential and was just used by the others at every turn yet none of them really helped him. Bryce in particular messed him over

• Ruhn had the most growth in this book. He felt the most rounded out as the book progressed and his character was very endearing

• The Hind has become one of the most interesting characters now. No questions please.

• Bryce had no right hiding Emile from Cormac. That decision in the longterm is probably the right decision but Cormac, as Sofie’s partner, as someone Sofie died entrusting Emile to his care, had every right to at least meet with him once to check on him, tell him stories of Sofie and make sure he’d be cared and loved for before they took him away

• Danika began to feel like a tool to progress the plot or reveal information. It became almost a running joke for me while reading. The constant reveals about her past felt very heavy handed and it made it seem like Danika and Bryce where only surface level friends. They clearly loved each-other, but what did Bryce really know about her that others didn’t?!

• Ithan being in love with Bryce was a useless plot point. It didn’t need to happen, it has no impact on the story at all other than to make us and some characters feel sorry for him. He has so many other interesting plot points and characteristics and I think it would have been much more interesting to focus on his feelings of isolation after being cut off from the pack, and his brothers death, than it did for him to keep feeling bad about being in love with Bryce. Them having a more sibling esc relationship like they did in the first book makes much more sense

• A lot of the villains felt like the same person with a different appearance. Like okay it’s a war, there’s going to be bad people, but a lot of them, mostly the triarii, felt like Maas said ‘copy and paste’.

• I can’t even begin to describe my frustration with Tharion’s character. He was good for comic relief and I like him, but he had many outs he could have taken to leave the Blue court earlier, but ended up putting himself in an arguably worse of situation by the end of the book. His excuse of not wanting to leave his parents ended up being useless because he did it anyway

• Otters in vests… otters in vests!

• I did like how Maas showed the fanaticism on both sides of the war. With the humans and Vanir. It showed how at this point, there’d be no winners to the war and that everyone would loose either way

• The relationship between Bryce and Hunt felt unbalanced to me. It felt as though Hunt was constantly sacrificing, giving up and ignoring his own feelings and thoughts about things to go along with what Bryce wanted and what she decided was the right thing to do. Bryce didn’t seem to really take his advice or opinion into consideration when making plans, and I felt like there was a distance between them because of this. Again, they clearly love each other. But a lot of things Hunt said to her, concerns he bought up, went ignored. And him having self doubt when Bryce went behind his back to arrange the Emile situation, really hurt, because eventually he would have come around and wanted to help her but instead he felt ostracised.

• The constant calling men ‘Alphaholes’ when they voiced their opinion, acted a little defensive of those they cared about or said anything against the female opinion felt like forced feminism. It really said gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss.

• Based on the cliffhangers I’m nervous with the direction Maas’ work is going to take. I love her books sm but if she try’s to bring even more characters/ plots into Crescent City’s, I think it’ll become to much/ too overwhelming. And there’ll begin to be more plots left unfinished or bought to unsatisfying conclusions.

i have many more opinions these are just some of the main things i had issue with, it does feel a bit like a fu to Bryce, but I really had issues with her in this book :(

[zombvibes]

According to the tags of your last Allyswap post, you have other AUs. Would you like to share the premise/any doodles you have?

This sounds you’re interrogating me, anon. /lh

Anywho, I DO have other aus and YES I would LOVE to share junk about them.

So when I made the teammateswap and allyswap guys, I had multiple ideas for the characters (obviously). So one day I thought “Man. I still really like these ideas and I wanna use them.” So I did!! Which became the alt aus like as in : alt teammateswap and alt allyswap. They were originally called tms! side b and as! side b. (Which tbh? Might go back to those names…not sure though.)

Like normal teammateswap and allyswap : alt tms is susie swapping with noelle, noelle swapping with berdly, and berdly swapping with susie. alt as is susie swapping with berdly, noelle swapping with susie, and berdly swapping with noelle!

And if y’all don’t mind I’ll just share their (old icky) sprites and some haha hehe dialogue boxes :

TOP = alt teammateswap , BOTTOM = alt allyswap

(There’s also art of them but um. It’s too old and grody for me to show on here. Unlike twitter, I want to seem prim and proper on tumblr /j)

Anyways, I’ll probably redesign them at some point and make them ““official”” and also because some swaps don’t really make sense. (But mostly talking about the Susies and Noelles here. The Berdlys are only there so the Noelles could mess with them. Don’t tell anyone I said that though.)

There’s also like…other random aus I thought would be cool or funny but I don’t plan on doing a lot with them (which I will list now) :

THE TIMEOUT AU

- An old snowgrave au idea I had where during the Berdly fight right before Noelle does her spell, Kris rips us out of their chest and puts us in a far they found in a trashcan off screen. Kris would finish the chapter without you and you’d have to watch and think about what you’ve done. (Hence the name.)

- I already talked about how the au would work on twitter but I doubt you’d wanna go onto twitter to see something so I’ll just copy and paste everything here :

This route is called The Timeout route! Kris is tired of your bullshit so they stuff you in a jar they found in one of the trashcans from the city! You get to watch Kris, Noelle, and Berdly finish the chapter without you because you’re a prick! To start this route, during chapter 1 you have to make Kris play the piano (which they do poorly). (You’ll probably have to do many other things to piss Kris off but I can’t think of any at the moment..just know that playing the piano is not optional) Chapter 1 ends as normal! Chapter 2, you gotta start the weird route! Like just killing stuff, then you get the ring etc. But when you get to the Berdly fight, there’s a small chance that Kris stops Noelle right before she does snowgrave. Afterwards, Kris (still in battle) rips out their soul and walks off the screen. There’s trash can rummaging noises the the background. Noelle and Berdly stand there shocked and Berdly asks what’s wrong with Kris. Noelle said that Kris was acting weird all day. Kris comes back with a jar that has their soul in it. Noelle and Berdly proceed to flip their shit. Kris puts the jar in their inventory and grabs Noelle and Berdly’s hands and drags them off to the right thus ending the battle. You get to see Noelle and Berdly ask Kris plenty of questions that Kris ignores and says that they’ll talk about it later. When Kris and co meets up with Susie and Ralsei, they notice that Kris is different. Susie asks what’s wrong, and Kris says that they’ll talk later. Yadda yadda yadda Everyone gets caged (except for Ralsei). Things happen as normal with some things happening differently cause Kris is in control duh. When Susie and Kris are in front of the fountain, Kris takes out the jar and opens the jar. The soul comes out and does its thing. Susie stands there shocked. Once they’re in the lightworld, everything happens normal. Berdly and Noelle leaves thinking it’s all a dream. Susie after they leave looks bewildered at Kris then shakes them : “What the hell was that all about????” You can finally control Kris here and pick between : Tell her what happened and What are you talking about? Telling her what happened : Susie becomes even more confused and Kris (out of your control) says that they’ll elaborate at some point and the conversation ends there. “What are you talking about?” : Susie flips out even more and shakes Kris angrily. Kris doesn’t say anything (this is your doing) and Susie just says : “Whatever…” and leaves without Kris. Susie will still have the sleepover but will be weird around Kris (depending on what which option you choose). Everything will end the same but Kris puts you in the cage and not between the couch. You’ll sit there not being able to see what happened to Susie and Kris. You’ll hear what happened though, you just can’t see it. Then the chapter ends! …Btw you don’t fight spamton in this route, Kris just doesn’t fight spamton.

- (I would’ve made the route work a little different if I worked on it NOW but hey…you get the idea I hope.)

- This au was meant to basically Kris giving the player the middle finger

DELTARUNE BUT IT’S SUMMER NOW I GUESS

- Another old idea I had. It’s normal just deltarune but it takes place during summer school. (Or just the summer I didn’t put too much thought into it. I just wanted to see Kris and Susie have fun in the sun together tbh) It all started because I wanted to make a Phineas and Ferb reference—

TIMESKIP AU

- What kind of au hoarder would I be if I didn’t make a “They’re adults now” au? It mostly focuses in Kris, Susie, and Noelle (Berdly’s there too but I mean…he’s just there. Not too important). The darkners don’t really age in my timeskip au because I just…think they wouldn’t really age like lightners would? Since they’re objects? I feel like they would still look the same but like…with eyebags or dirt/dust on them or something. (Didn’t think about it too much,,)

- They’re all around 20 something? 25??

- There’s art of this too but again…too old and grody for me to show. Pretty sure I posted timeskip suselle stuff on here once but you’ll have to find it yourself I’m not linking it. It’s still a little embarrassing,,,

- I think I may redesign them in the future since they look too “self indulgent” and not how I would actually imagine them in their 20s.

- It’s basically The “Everyone gets facial hair now” au honestly LMAO

SPECIES SWAP

- Another obvious thing for an au hoarder to have— Basically, Kris is a reptile, Susie is a goat, and Ralsei is a human! (There’s also Noelle, who’s a bird, and Berdly, who’s a reindeer…but. I’ll probably not do that or at least it wouldn’t be “canon” to the au.)

- In this au, Susie is a darkner and Ralsei is a lightner (along with Kris.) And this is kind of a role swap as well (kinda?). Ralsei would be the one the player controls. Kris isn’t controlled by their soul and has their regular personality. Susie and Lancer were already established to be buddies before Kris and Ralsei arrived in the dark world. Though in this au, Susie’s personality would be a little goofier to match with Lancer’s. She’s still mean though but chapter 2 mean and not really chapter 1 mean. Ralsei would talk but we wouldn’t be able to hear him (like with human Kris.) He does talk way more than human Kris though. Kris doesn’t talk at all unless necessary or for a funny/dumb quip. For their dark world versions um tbh? I can’t really choose on whether Ralsei should have a sword (like human Kris) or magic (like goat Ralsei). I guess the sword would make more sense but goat Susie would feel a little empty if she isn’t swinging her big ol’ axe around. Again…didn’t think about it too much. OH YEAH AND darkner goat Susie is a prince like goat Ralsei is. (Not princess though because Susie still has her butch lesbian swag in this au)

- Uhhh I do have concept art but it’s not much…I hope to actually sketch out the concepts at some point because darkner goat Susie sounds so much fun to work on!! I have clear ideas of everyone’s designs in my head, just didn’t put it “paper” yet.

So uh…YUP! Think that’s all! If anyone’s interested on hearing about or seeing a specific au, I’ll try my best to elaborate on it more or quicking sketch out something)

(I’m asking you to send me asks about them if you’re curious)