#and you dont have to think this is normal because if you by now havent harbored some sort of
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AsaDen x Metaphor Re:Fantazio
#*akademia theme plays*#i dunno what really possessed me to do this tbh#i just really love the art direction for metaphor#the menu art is just... so perfect to me#and i wanted to do it for one of my favorite ships#the longer i look at it the funnier i feel because like#why did i make this aldkjas#literally just THEM doing nothing#but i guess its just a thing where i combine two things i love#i already loved asaden and got inspired to do more art for them when i posted a piece on reddit#and then metaphor came along and completely took me by the hand and inspired me to do more#if you havent go look at the menu art for it and listen to the akademia theme#you'll get it once you see it i think#i dont really expect a ton of people to like this since it feels so normal haha#also im always cursed to draw one or the other slightly off#and this time it's denji lol#also i know they'd have some softer features bc theyre japanese#but i'm always weirded out by not showing jaws n stuff#idk its a style thing#also yes this is my mobile banner now im sorry sasunaru#anyway im done rambling in the tags sorry about that#my art#chainsaw man#asaden#asa mitaka#csm fanart#denji#denji hayakawa#csm x metaphor#artists on tumblr
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ruyan is literally so beautiful that i get ill looking at her
#a lot of my time as a person who cant recognize himself to the point that if you start asking about myself im going to lie to you#is that i really like to engage with media that asks you to be present in the text by creating an outside being who simply has#some similarities to me#like the concepts i know i have. but make them their own unique person#so ruyan is really fun in that if i was a well adjusted person she would probably be a self insert and not her own person#but instead by the grace of god and my own mental problems she exists and is a full person that i practically see as a friend#like when i like a character so much that they become a comfort to me (emil) my brain engages in relationship interpretation to that#chartacter. emil is my daughter who i feel paternal sentiments to despite me being a human person and her being code in a video game#for ruyan she is like a friend where i want to go to her wedding and see her kids and hear about her life#i may have made her but i watch her as if i just met her'#recognizing this thing i have going on has helped me immensely be comfortable with myself#ruyan is a friend to me a sister tock is my daughter who i feel a real world father-daughter dynamic towards#i feel the need to nourish her and entertain her and put her to bed and let her know i love her#and you dont have to think this is normal because if you by now havent harbored some sort of#This Guy is Weird sentiment towards me youre either like me or VERY kind#but i know that i have parts of me that are weird. i am 23 years old bringing toys to the beach#but i dont chase validation so much as i just enjoy when its given to me#but i dont need validation because i cant even form my own self to need validation for#im learning about myself like im wiping down an old mirror. that doesnt need validation because im seeing it for the first time#im having my understanding moment here and you are free to leave the room and leave me to my mirrow
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So I drew cyrus in one of his outfits from TACO salad!! A amazing fic by Lady_Sandry on ao3. Some close ups under the read more and notes in the tags!




#octopath traveler 1#octopath traveler#cyrus albright#okay Now i can ramble#So. first off i honestly dont think i did a great job making him look like cyrus. i do struggle to transfer characters into my style without#lowkey redesigning (the curse of rarely doing fanart and being a character designer)#constructive criticism welcome btw!!#but some general design notes!!#i wanted to add purple into his color scheme because its simply a color i associate with him (to me Therion is light purples and cyrus is#dark purples)#despite his actual color being black. i just dont like using black unless im doing like blank and white w pops of colors#same thing with white. i normally use off whites.#about his eyes!! they are grey in the fic so here i gave him very grey light purple eyes (for previously mentioned reasons of not liking#black and white)#and!! to represent his magic are the blue yellow and red eye shines. red being the main one since its mentioned he was naturally inclined#towards it in the fic#i used paper and pencil (overlined w a blue pen) then took a picture and drew atop that in ibis paint (great option if you only have a phone#btw.)#also i havent drawn since. literally my last post#so im Rusty#getting back into it yippie<3
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#so for the last like. as long as i can remember. ive had a shit sleep schedule#mostly like sleep all day and stay up all night kinda shit#but i got sick/burnt out recently and slept for almost two days straight#and somehow it reset my sleep schedule to something normal#like i went to bed at 10pm and woke up at 5am for the last few days#and i havent had to nap#and the not needing to nap is really fucking with me#like im used to waking up. feeding my dog. and then napping until i go to work#i should be napping rn. but im not tired#i dont have to get ready for work for another four hours and ive already been awake for three hours#i went to the coffee shop and to walgreens. im in real clothes instead of pajamas. i did a load of laundry#im laying in bed (its so hot i might be dying) and i just. dont know what to do with my time#im probably gonna do some cleaning and packing because im moving in two months#idk im just feeling some strange type of way because for the last few days ive been. alive#instead of sleeping my life away#its so strange. i got sick. slept for a few days. and now my biggest problem is just fixed? and i can have a life now?#its 70 degrees today and the world is my oyster. what should i do?#i have a list of chores im gonna do. i might walk to the coinstar machine so ill have money#yeah i want to do that cuz im in the negatives in my bank account but i want to get a cool drink before work today#my dad texted me this morning 'noticed your bank account is overdrawn for the second time this week. whats going on kid?'#which is such a sad text to get because i know im broke. thanks dad. lets pls ignore my financial hardships#if you want to make my dad less sad hmu for my venmo /hj#anyways ill probs do that today. get some cash so i can get a frozen lemonade from wawa or something#yknow that post thats like 'seasonal depression seems fake until its 50 degrees in march and it feels like you took a party drug'#i think thats partially whats happening here. its 70 degrees and sunny and my systems dont know what to do with that#i hope youre all having a great day that you dont sleep through. i love you!!
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i havent been very active here because i havent actually been struggling too much lately. i usually go here when im exhausted or having a hard time relating to my disabilities but over the past while ive been really good. yayayayay
#i keep this blog and my normal regular blogs separate#because i dont like being worried about#so this is meant to be away from my friends where i dont have to make myself tired and struggle#like ive said i CAN type normal like im doing now but#this blog is for when i just cannot force it anymore.#this masking ability is ONLY online. i cannot mask in real life. if you saw me type like this after hearing me speak with my voice#youd think we're different people#but yeah thats why i havent been on really! i can talk easier. still hard but i dont need to hide and rest
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feels like the universe (trans people I follow on tumblr dot com) is telling me I should get into tf2 again to spite my ex who tried to convince me playing it meant I was apparently cool with white supremacy somehow
#realizing im the regular amount of insane ive always been and ive just been gaslit into believing im extra insane and unlovable is crazy#what do you MEAN my last delusional episode was over 3 years ago and not like. last december?#what do you mean my professional diagnoses have stayed the same and im not worse worse worse infecting everyone around me??#i can't do it because it would actually be very mean and bitchy of me but i think it would be so funny if i messaged them erev yom kippur#like 'i know you dont celebrate but i wanted to say before the day of atonement that i forgive you and im grateful you left'#dont worry about the thousands of dollars you owe me because id rather not hear from you ever again. im sure you already werent worrying tho#seeing as you havent made any effort to pay it back at all :^) just keep the furniture as a reminder of the time you uhhh.#broke a glass and told me i ruined your life because i was sad a family member died#also it was really cool how you left me and then gave me a ring and then kissed me even though i didnt want to. normal behavior!#glad you finally got a job now that you cant just use my money anymore. crazy how that works isnt it?#ugh i feel evil rn. just thinking about how happy i could be if i didnt respond to their message like i was thinking i shouldnt years ago#i guess i cant be sure. everything would be different. but i wouldnt have been so specifically manipulated by them and id have more money#which would be helpful for like. medical stuff#id still be on psych meds which would be nice bc i do feel like im on an eroding cliffside rn
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really have some "family" problems going on right now. A full grown adult acting like petulant child situations, messing up things because they arent getting their way.
#just found one of my jars of leave in hair conditioner just....scooped out clean#not even used in hair-just she just dumped it either down the sink or in the trash#just because she wasnt getting the things she wanted#its.....a thing happening right now#i dont know myself too well mentally but i havent been talking or doing things about this#just going to work and coming back home doing things normally#i think thats backfired on me somehow?#im just very tired and just-well not underperform at work-but dont have the energy they want me to have#so thats why i took my leave of absensce#they asked when i'd come back (it doesn't start until the 20th of this month) but im not even sure#i think i just need that time for me to actually make stuff you know?#inshallah i can rest well
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Can you write some scar fluff/comfort? As in kissing slashers scars (And trying to not get stabbed /hj) or vise versa? Maybe with Jason, Micheal, Brahms, and Thomas? (Feel free to change them up)
Kissing their scars (Jason, Brahms, Thomas and Michael)
and the days writing begins! hoping to get a lot done, even if a lot of it wont be posted today to avoid spam- wooo!! notes: reader is gn, you kiss their scars, michaels part is admittedly short mostly due to the admin still not totally used to writing for him yet- havent quite felt ive got his personality down cws: healed injuries, nothing intense but i like to be safe than sorry
JASON
he has more than his fair share of scars, and honestly? hes not all that worried about them, hes not ashamed of them- he takes them as a sign that hes been doing well with protecting his space as well as you
still open to you kissing them, theres lots to choose from.... hes got them on his hands, his back, shoulders, youre sure if you look there would be a scar somewhere
the moment is so tender that he may shutter a little with some emotion, being slightly more emotive than he normally is
take his hand and press his scarred knuckles to your mouth for a gentle kiss and hes going to be melting in your grasp
its not much different than the kisses you press onto his mask but the intention feels different- if that makes sense.. hes bad at describing things...
BRAHMS
does not like his scars at all- he thinks they look unsightly and they feel uncomfortable against his skin thats not scarred over
covers most of them with his mask and clothing, but you can see some splotches here and there
he... doesnt quite know how to feel about it when you kiss them, but hes not going to deny himself the extra attention and affection that youve giving him
with time he may grow to accept them; whether or not he stops covering them up is a totally different thing, though...
one thing is still the same, the second you give him some extra loving hes going to expect that to be the new normal- surely you wont mind cuddling into him while trailing kisses up and down his body where his scars reside!
MICHAEL
similar to jason, he doesnt mind his scars all that much... in fact he doesnt care about them at all, and you probably wouldnt have known he had them if you didnt see him without his usual coveralls on
shows no visible reaction to you lightly pressing kisses to the scars he lets you get close enough- usually reserved to the ones on his hands hes gotten from minor burns or nicks
does not seek affection, but its a good sign that hes not pulling away or otherwise getting you to stop... because if he truly wasnt interested in it he wouldnt indulge you
doesnt quite understand the sentiment behind kissing his (now healed) wounds but you do you
THOMAS
you make him feel better about his looks, youre always uplifting him so you kissing along his face- especially concentrating it around where his nose once was- makes him feel.. nice
it does come as a little surprise at first, though, not that he thinks youre revolted or not fully willing to show your devotion and love for him... its more so the act never crossed his mind until you did it
youre cupping his head in your hands, fingers lightly tangled in his hair... perhaps even massaging his scalp as you lean in for another kiss
truly he is in heaven as you give him all of your love, youve never seen someone look at you with so much love in their eyes... much less look at you like that
it does make him more willing to take his masks off around you, now fully reassured that you dont mind his appearance at all and that you like the face he was given
#jason vorhees x reader#jason vorhees imagine#jason voorhees x reader#jason x reader#jason voorhees imagine#brahms heelshire x reader#brahms imagine#brahms heelshire imagine#brahms x reader#michael myers x you#michael myers imagine#michael myers x reader#thomas hewitt x you#thomas hewitt x reader#thomas hewitt imagine#slasher x reader#slasher x you#slasher imagine#slashers x reader#slashers x you#slashers imagine#canon x reader#canon x you#x reader
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Yandere batfam with a sick reader?
Yes but sick reader who is still defiant because hello, they kidnapped you?????
Reader is just glaring at them with tired eyes and a red nose as they once again tuck her under the covers, Dick is highly worried as he frets over you like a mama hen because he did have a heart attack when he caught you standing in front of your open window, where "harsh" gusts of cold air were "attacking your fragile form", so of course, he had to drag you in and wrap his arms around you, rub his cheek against you because he NEEDS to warm you immediately, lest you die of hypothermia.
Yes, Dick overreacts. And yes, Damian will accompany his brother in his delusions, or well, take any chance he gets to scold you.
"You should be in bed, Y/n." Damian said sternly, his eyes narrowed because how dare you worry his favourite brother like this. "Didn't Dick tell you to rest? Are you that incapable of following simple commands?"
You narrowed your eyes back at him, opening your mouth to say something mean but got cut off by your own coughing fit, making Dick rush to help you drink some water, rubbing your back along it. Your throat felt scractchy, and it hurt to speak, but you still wanted to convey your feelings so-
You flipped him off. For a nano second, because Dick immediately grabbed your hand and tucked it back under the covers while Damian's eyes widened at you disrespect, but before he could make any more gremlin noises, but Bruce walked in and Damian knew better than to complain to him about you when youre already sick, cause Bruce wouldve still favoured you.
"Y/n? How do you feel now?" Bruce asked, his voice gentle as he walked closer to where Dick was throwing away your mountain of tissues.
"Im fine. I wanna go out-" "No." "And why not?" "Because youre sick." "You may be Batman, but youre not a doctor!" "I am your father though."
No, youre not. You wanted to say, but knew that would only piss him off and you need to be on his good side if you want Dick and the others to be off your back so that you can escape.
"Whats her temperature?" Bruce asked Dick, who put a thermometer in your mouth quickly. Dick sighed as he told Bruce how you were out of bed and standing in your balcony in the cold just moments ago.
Bruce placed a palm over your forehead, and you tried to move away but there wasnt really any space or energy for you to do that. Bruce's eyes shifted the slightest bit at your burning forehead. "Why do you insist on getting out of bed and sleeping on the floor? Ive already had to pick you up 3 times in the past 2 days."
You pulled out the thermometer and glared at him. "Im fine. Its just sniffles." Bruce's lip quirked a little. You looked absolutely adorable in your delirious state, like an angry kitten.
"I dont think its just sniffles this time. And-" Bruce pulled the thermometer from your hands that you were hiding under the covers. "-dont hide the thermometer from me." His eyes scanned it and the twitch in his brow was enough for Dick to know that the number was too high.
Bruce then eyed the cough syrup next to your side table- its still full.
"Why havent you been taking your medicine?"
"Im not sick-"
"White paint has more color than you do right now. So why havent you been taking the medicine?" Bruce asked and even though he was a little annoyed, he had enough practice dealing with the other kid's rebellious phases to have the patience of a saint.
You shrugged. "How do I know its just cough syrup and not a sedative?" "It is a sedative too. Its supposed to make you sleepy." "Well, I dont wanna sleep and let my guard down in a house full of 5 strange men." You obviously never counted Alfred- hes the only normal one here- except for the part that he wont call the cops for you, but oh well.
Bruce just casted a look to Dick and before you knew it, Dick was pinching your nostrils close and titling your head up while Bruce grabbed the syrup and poured some in your mouth before clamping his hand over it. You struggled to break free, but you were obviously no match to them. Still, tears of frustration pricked your eyes as you looked at them in betrayal and hatred.
"Drink this and dont argue with me, please." Bruce said- well, he genuinely requested at this point.
You didnt have much of a choice other than swallowing it.
With a defiant glare, you begin closing your eyes as your body gave into the effects of the drug, the last thing that you felt were Bruce kissing your forehead while Dick pecked your cheek.
Jason finally decides to drop by the Wayne manor, only to be greeted with the sight of reader lying on the kitchen floor. His heart stopped for a moment- you werent breathing-
"Y/n!" He rushed to your side, only to be smacked in the face by you.
"Shush. Dont be too loud." Your voice sounded like sandpaper against rocks.
Jason huffed. "Well, sorry for freaking out. I thought you were dead-"
"From a cough? Im not weak."
"Yeah? So, what exactly are you doing on the cold floor in the middle of the night?"
"..."
"Well?"
"What? So I cant even take a nap in this house? Jesus Christ, am I allowed to have any autonomy here?"
"Y/n." Jason called, clearly unamused by your sarcasm.
"Fine. I may have fallen and then didnt have the energy to get up, so im just catching my breath here."
"Why are you even out of bed?"
"I was hungry and Im not gonna drink another spoon of Alfred's bland soup again." Alfred made it bland on purpose so that your throat wouldnt be irritated.
"Please stop wasting whats left of your voice on complaints of the soup that you cant even taste." Jason chuckled as he picked you up, only for you to push at his chest weakly.
"I dont need your help. I can walk on my own."
Jason quirked a brow. "If you can make it to the front door without fainting or throwing up, I'll help you escape." You stared at the front door- it wasnt too far, but judging by the fact that its even hard for you to breathe properly and that youve fainted way too many times by just standing for more than a couple of minutes.
But youre stubborn. With great effort, you pushed yourself off Jason and used the kitchen island to pull yourself up. Jason decided to walk in front of you and stand near the kitchen exit because he really wanted to see your struggling face.
You took a trembling step, then another, one hand still using the support of the island until it ended and you were only a couple of feet away from Jason. At this point, you were already out of breath and when you took another step, your legs gave out and the room began spinning.
Luckily, Jason was quick to react. "Alright, just place your arm around mine- or just fall on me, that works too." He teased when you couldnt hold your body weight.
You slumped in his arms. "Just take me to my room." You huffed.
"Alright." Jason lifted your legs up and carried you back up the stairs. "You know you'd get better a lot faster if you just stayed in bed and took your medicine on time. Wouldnt that make your chances of escaping the manor better?"
You stared at him blankly. "Wow. The world must be ending for Jason Todd to be making logical suggestions."
Jason rolled his eyes as he tucked you in bed. "Im just saying, if you get better faster, you'll get to try running from us quicker too."
How do you explain to him that you just dont want to comply to them, even when they're helping you. How do you explain that you dont wanna listen to them because the soft pitiful, patronising look they get in their eyes when they look at you makes you wanna scream and carve your skin out. These are strangers, rich men who just kidnapped you to be a part of their family. No one is that kind. And nothing ever comes for free. Nothing.
"Do you need something? Food, perhaps?" Jason asked. You shook your head. "No, I think Im gonna throw up."
"Oh shit." Jason was hauling his ass out of the room t get you a bucket, only to return with a backpack.
You barely held your puke as you asked. "Wait- whose is this?"
"I dont know!? Damian's?!"
You grinned. "Oh, perfect." You proceeded to throw up into Damian's bag. That little shit just got on your nerves.
BONUS:
"I know you have attachment issues with your blanket but its been a couple of days now and you need to let me wash it." Dick said, trying to tug it out of your grip.
You sniffled and glared. "Im not a child who needs their blankie, Dick. Im just too cold without it and no other blanket can warm me up the same way it does."
"Give the blankie, Y/n." Dick said seriously.
"Its not a blankie." You retorted, but before you could react, Tim suddenly grabbed you while Dick ripped away the blanket. And even though he immediately replaces it with a clean blanket, you still let out a gut wrenching cry
"You'll have it back tomorrow-" Tim starts saying, only for you to sneeze directly in his face, making him freeze.
"And that's why we use tissues." Dick says, wiping both your nose and Tim's face with tissues, while you're not making any effort to suppress the grin that comes on your lips.
#yandere batfamily#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfam#yandere bruce wayne#yandere jason todd x reader#yandere jason todd#yandere dick grayson#yandere damian wayne#yandere tim drake
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Bloody Letters | Banda Sunato x GN!Reader



Summary: Banda is in prision, you the only survivor of his killing are still being haunted by him in a simple way. Letters.
Warnings: Banda is a warning himself - Toxic!Relationship - Traumatic!Reader - Obsessive!Banda - Mentions of Gore and Mutilation - Mentions of sex - Reader gets called Bird - MDNI - +18 -
The first one came after he was arrested. It was only one week and yet he seemed to be missing you.
"Hello my Bird, each day in here its a torture I cant endure without you. Do you remember that week when I could not go out because the police was near our home? We had such a great time. I dont remember a place where I did not fuck you nice and full. The house never smelled better, sex and blood...the memory of it makes me hard while I write this. Why dont you send me some of these pics I took during that time? It would help me so much.
With devotion, your Banda"
You had pucked after it, wishing that by ignoring him he would let you alone. But you knew better.
At court you were called to testify against him. And you did, the horrors you had survived were showed to you once more. But you stood your ground. The most sickering thing was him. He looked proud of himslef after each relate of how he killed and dismemberment a victim was told, and when he looked at you. It was a look so confused, his eyes like an abyss of pure evil and possession.
You had to stay in your parents home after that day.
"My Dear Bird, you looked so stunning at court today. Are you eating well? I see you having lose some weight. But thats fine, we can work that up once im out of here.
I must say, I was quiet sad that you did not testify on my side. Didnt you say you loved me ? That we would be together till death ?
Maybe you forgot your place. Maybe your wings are growing again.
See you soon my bird"
"Bird.
Why are you not responding ? Do you know how hard its to get these letters out ?
Do you think you can go back to normal and escape me ? Im in your life now, I left part of me inside you multiple times. You cant just ignore that, or what ? Did you get a new partner? Bird no one would ever care for you like I did. We bathed together in the blood of that woman!! Do you remember ? You were crying so much and it was such a good thing to see..."
Each day you waited that they will stop coming. That whoever was allowing these letters out would have some compassion for you.
You could not sleep or eat. Each sound made you remember him and his tortures. The dark was once again your biggest fear, each shadow made you think it was him.
"My Dear Bird, sorry my last letters were too violent, I now see my mistake.
The therapist here says I should learn to control my impulses, how would he react if I told him i already imagined him dead by my knife ? Do you think he would react at all ?
You know I havent see it in so long. I miss it. Remember who I used it to ambush you that night ? I accidentally cut you, that was a real accident. I did not get to enjoy the moment. All the other ones....oh I did. The moments we shared are engraved in my mind forever now. Much like how my name its on your skin.
You havent remove it have you? I put so much effort on it...it would be a shame if you removed it.
Well I guess i will have to do it again then. We can do it as a part of our reunion.
With care, Banda"
The wait for his sentence was long. One more time, you had to see him one more time and then he would be gone of your life forever.
"My Bird.
Can you believe we will be seeing each other again ? We will soon reunite!!
I hope you smile more this time. You know I always loved that smile of yours....
You can cry too. It did things to me when you cried.
Have I mention how I keep dreaming of you? Its a shame I cant shove my dick inside you like I used to. You made the most delicious noises, specially when you were not fully awake and then when you did notice what whats happening...
Im getting hard just by thinking of it..."
"For the crimes the accused Banda Sunato has commitmet he is sentenced to death penalty with no chance for a appeal" The judge said and you felt like the world was off from you. You fell on the court's chair your family and Friends crying and hugging you. The family of the dead victims crying too.
But him. He was not crying. He was smiling that sick smile of his. His eyes pointed at you like a predator seeing his prey. For the first time you held his gaze and you saw how he did a move to try and come to you but was soon stopped by some guards.
"My Little Bird...
You were so beautiful at court today as well. And with your family no less, I have wanted to meet them for sometime now. What does they think of our relationship? Does they like me ? Does your father aprove of me ? I hope your mom cocks just as well as you used to. I cant wait to sit all together and tell them all the fantastic times we had together.
Where should I start ? The first night? The first time I took you ? When you saw me murder another person ? Maybe when you cocked their flesh ?-"
"Stop stop" You said covering your ears as your father read the letter with more and more ferocity.
"I will kill him myself" He said almost throwing the letter when a part catched his eyes. He went pale as he read it.
"What is it?" Your mom asked as she hugged you.
"I- I dont think-"
"Please Dad...what is it?" You begged now
"Dear Bird, do you know they grant a final wish for these whos sentence is death ? Besides a meal we get one final wish. And my wish was to see you once more, just you and me alone in a room. I hope the judge sees my love for you and gives me that final wish....I cant wait to smell you again-"
"No!!" Your mother screamed taking the letter from your father then throwing it. "He cant ask for it! I wont let them go, the judge wont- the judge wont aprove it" Your mother said between sobs.
But justice failed you and did grant Babda his final wish and even demanded that you must be present or pay a big amount of money.
The light blue room and too bright light was making your skin crawl back as you waited. You knew there were officers and your own parents behind the glass but that still did not ease your nerves.
Finally he came guided by another officer, he was chained, feet and hands. Once sat in front of you the guard made sure he could not move or reach you before leaving.
Banda smiled at you "Hello my Bird, did you get my letters ? You never wrote back" He asked a slight mocking tone on his side.
"I burned them. You are never going to hurt me again. You are dead Banda, after this you will be nothing" You said back trying to keep your voice steady and calm even if your fingers were thighten the edges of the chair.
This caused Banda' smile to slowly dissapear. His posture now tense, he was studying you. Like many times before.
"Do you really think this is the end? That I wont ever be part of you again? My Bird...we are mean to be together till the end. If its not by my hand then i can assure you. Fate will bring us together"
"You can go to hell Banda, and take that fate with you too. We are done" You got up giving him one last look before walking out of the room. Once outside you collapsed on your parents arms, the start of a panic attack coming.
"Its over Dear, its over"
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○
Shibuya was always packed with people and while you were not really feeling that much need to go out, you knew you needed to take your life back.
The lights changed and you started to cross, lost in the music from your phone you failed to notice something from the sky...
Next thing you knew you were in the middle of the city but...it was empy. No noise, no cars, nothing. Fear went over your body as you checked your phone. Dead, no signal.
What...was this another episode ?
"Well, seems like fate does wants us together my Bird" The voice who owned your nightmares spooke from behind.
You turned and there he was, his smile back and blood dripping from his hand where now a knife stood.
"Oh dont look at me like that...you know I cant contain myself if you do" Banda said twisting the knife with expertise "five minutes, thats your head start"
Your heart fell as your legs started to tremble but you could not move. This was not possible. How could he be here...and where were the people ?
"Run little Bird, becuase once I catch you. You wont be moving for a long time..."
And so you ran knowing he never said these things without meaning them.
#alice in borderland#aib imagine#aib imagines#alice in borderland x reader#banda sunato x reader#aib x reader
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On the off chance you've come across this in your own medical research, my partner (POTS, joint hypermobility, ND) needs to crack/pop her joints several times an hour, especially her fingers, wrists, ankles and knees. She specifically remembers it starting when she was 16. It's not really a problem except that if she can't pop a specific joint the feeling develops into pain, and sometimes she just can't get it to happen for a few hours. Is this something you've heard of in connective tissue disorder literature? Doctors have been, as you would expect, totally useless about it, and while it seems harmless now...
this is off the cuff; i havent heard about this but it does just sound like one of those things that could theoretically happen to someone with weird joints. on the other hand joint "popping" is something most normal people also can do, and in the last research on joints popping in those (non-hypermobile) cases that i read (which was a while ago so maybe out of date), it was discovered that joint popping isn't really "doing" anything, it was just making a bubble of gas and a sound using a vacuum basically, but it seems to have a powerful somatic effect which is why chiropractors use it. it's also a really, really common stim for various ND people. i wouldnt assume your partner's joint popping is purely somatic/habitual though, who knows what's going on in there or how it differs from non-hypermobile people
my concern would be that in 99% of the cases of "weird human tricks" that hypermobile people can do, doing those weird human tricks will loosen and damage tissue further and doctors agree that you should absolutely not do them unless demonstrating a symptom to a doctor or something. i would be concerned about continuing the joint-popping habit for this reason. but at the same time, pain is a really strong indicator in the opposite direction. so who knows.
actually now that i type all this out i am reminded that when my neck or hip gets out of joint i have to pop them back into place. i dont know for sure that this is a subluxation (minor dislocation), because im not standing inside an xray when it happens, but thats what it feels like. i do know that this happens to a lot of hypermobile people. the problem with trying to search for the term, which is a real medical term, is that chiropractors (fucking again) have decided that everyone on earth gets subluxations (false) and also that chiropractors can heal every disease by "aligning" your skeleton with powerful blows (false, especially for hypermobile people, who should avoid chiropractors even more dedicatedly than normal people). this is bullshit and can be safely ignored. however, many hypermobile people do actually get minor dislocations frequently, because the connective tissue holding joints together just isnt doing its job. ribs are a really common one. for me its the neck tendons and femoral heads.
i dont think a doctor will have any idea what youre talking about. maybe a physical therapist would be more helpful though, even just to ask questions and see what they think about the "joint popping is possibly damaging my joints further" vs "not popping my joints causes pain" situation
#asks#this is an anti-chiropractor blog#they're quacks and charlatans and they injure thousands of people a year
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my tsats 2 expectations!
Nico looking healthier: At the end of tsats1 we see him thinking "how could i not eat when it gives so much pleasure?" or smt like that. I can see him improving significantly his eating habits and at least gaining a bit of muscular mass (is that how we put it?), which will make him more powerful, since normally eating a grape a day might reduce your necromancy powers.
Nico being cute: we can absolutely expect that he will be insufferable next to will in this book. Like, he was already being the cringiest nerd ever at the first book, where he still had a LOT of emotional limitations, he wouldnt let go of will, always touching him and showing absurd amounts of affection through his touch. We can expect him being a little shit even more now that he seems to be getting more and more comfortable with wills touch.
TEENAGER COCOA PUFFS: (god i love this one). I think it could be something like: the more nico grows comfortable with aspects of his trauma, the more the cocoa puffs grow. The more he accepts and deals with shame, the more the little ball of darkness grows until it actually evolves as something with a physical form. I remember seeing something about the cocoapuffs taking animal forms as they grow and i LOVE this concept. Imagine some monster or deity trying to taunt nico with shame or envy and this teenager sized bear shows up from the darkness. God, i cant, nico is the coolest character EVER.
COCOA PUFFS: i like the concept of them also growing independet, as much as the idea of some little balls of darkness following nico is very dear to me, i also like the idea of them exploring the world or evolving as creatures too. They would be independent creatures but as an extention of nico, they have their own personalities, connected with their respective trauma but you can see the action part being similar to nicos.
COCOA PERSONALITIES: Shame being shy but when cornered they get angry and defensive. Envy being full of pride and "comunicative" but when triggered they get quiet and cold.
NICO GETTING HADES' BLESSING: i think one of the things most of the nico stans have in common is an absurd love for his demonstrations of power 🙂↕️. The thing with hades' blessing is: we dont know what it is, up to this point we havent seen anyone get it and deal with it yet, which is very cool because we can overpower it on our heads 🤭! I THINK, the hades blessing would act to counter the biggest weakness of most (ig) children of hades, it would waste way less energy. Of course it would seem sick, like making nico actually look and perform as a creature of the underworld, him getting horns, maybe? nico getting black eyes? his skin turning grey? his hair turning white? nico having less form? being completelly engulfed by shadows? God i loooove fanservice, lets go rick and mark yall have one job, and it is to make nico look like a dragon ball transformation, so we can look at it and think "sick". I like to think that his fighting style at this state merges with his powers, going for a kick at his oponents head then suddenly apearing behind them? sick. stealing the life of his oponents? killing them while healing himself from it? sick. getting shadows with venon around him? absolutely sick.
NICO BEING GOOD AT GAMES: i love gamer nico. It matches his personality soo well. That is like the best remedy to insomnia, right? Im not really a gamer myself aside from competitive online games, and i cant really imagine nico playing league (ew), but i could see him ending resident evil 7 in a night. Playing tomb raider? yes! I could see him playing most adventure, suspense and horror games, and the thing is: bitch can play the most gut wrenching games with the scariest jump scares EVER, and he wouldnt even flinch. on the other side, him getting easily scared by anything on this games would also be super funny. Bitch screaming like a prey runing from a lion while playing dbd. He went to tartarus and is dissolving by a jumpscare? funniest concept ever.
NICO LOOKING HANDSOME: and way more intimidating. With some sun, actually being happy for once, better eating habits and accepting himself i think he would look quite good. I see him now with very black hair and very black doe eyes, a full mouth and a very straight and a bit too big nose, a bony face shape and a little bit of eyebags. I like to think he still has these features but his face is really symetrical and his skin makes him look like a doll, his lips and beautifull but his eyes, even though they look beautiful, the look is haunting, and make you need to look away. He looks like he's reading your mind, but he also looks so handsome you want to keep looking. I think he has long lashes too, and his scar only makes him more intimidating, it is the only not symetrical thing on his face and it makes him stand out. He has a cold look in his eyes, you never know what he is thinking (aside from will that reads him like a book), and the fact that he is constantly getting healthier and more handsome is very haunting.
NICO ACCEPTING HIS GOOD PARTS AND WILL ACCEPTING HIS BAD PARTS: I think this one is my favorite so far, Nico being able to sustain himself in a fight, stealing life from oponents (i loooove this one), or simply learning how to heal because he understands that death and life are the same thing. While Will understands that not all lives are meant to be saved, and to save more lives it might take some difficult choices like not saving others. It might make him get the hability of necrosing things just like nico, or (like canon) giving diseases just like he heals.
thats it for now! english is not my first language! be kind.
#nico di angelo#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo#solangelo#the sun and the star#tsats spoilers#will solace
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yeah no im fine dwbi
sorry 4 everything btw
What
What are you sorry for wwhat
You better be okay ehat the hell
#im getting stressed over shit i cant control and i have so much schoolwork and i feel guilty about everything ever and#yeah#having a time#i think i projected on akito too hard and he took revenge and projected back onto me#because im feeling all the emotions i made him feel recently#this keeps fucking happening. i wrote akikoha making out can someone come and make out with me now. please. i dont want the other shit#aghdaghsjgdaghjsdhg explodes#i think if i could cry this would be better but i literally havent cried in going on 5 years#yeah 5#bc it was 3 when my mum went into hospital#eyeah i knwo how time works#idkkkkkk i think every emotion ive ever felt has just. sat. in my brain. and ive been ignoring them and occasionally my eye twitches#and thats the closest i get to emotions these days#and then i feel like tearing out my organs and giving them to the nearest person whos ever shown me kindness bc i dont deserve shit#cause i cant give it abck yk#also bullshit keeps happening eye arr ell and its Stressing Me Out more than it normally would and i Dont Know Why#combination of everything i think#i need to drop a subject that would fix me i think. or two.#i think if(when) we meet up irl you are Getting Hugged and i might start sobbing#bc im not sure theres anyone irl rn who i actually love#and i 100% love you#idk#dies ont he spot#sell my organs for the money itd probably do you more good than dealing with (gestures vaugely)#tomi tag#dont read all this lmao im just rambling
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if Jimmy and Timmy get married, how would the wedding go? Who proposes to the other? how does the proposal go?
this is the best ask ever i forgot how much i love schmaltz <3<3. heres some quick doodles as a bonus <3
as for the wedding and events proceeding, i think its go well! they deserve a little break from the stuff in their life, as a treat /q. Unless something like the syndicate crashes their party (i.. dont think theyd be that evil to do that tbh, i havent really dabbled w them story wise but idk, its a wedding im sure they'd be civil for once..) or some interuniversal threat pops up that needs their immediate action (something like garnet's wedding from su). which tbh would probably inhance the expirence for timmy, hes a straight menace and thinks stuff like that is awesome </3. but anyways
in general relationship stuff timmy may be the more forward one but i think jimmy would be the one to establish the milestones, plus that hes more traditional in my characterization of him. that being said, timmy would totally unintentionally propose or joke about marrying him and jimmy would 100% take him up on that with no hesitation.
now onto wedding stuff bc damn do i have a soft spot for this kinda stuff <3<3
the flowers i chose are forget-me-nots and pink / peachy orange aster flowers with a touch of roses in those same colors as well. i implore you to look up the flower meanings i had fun w em <3
I chose the color peach/a coral (is that what that color is ??) for the wedding because its a combo of timmy's pink and jimmy's redish orange (vermillion ?). i just think combining their colors when it comes to ships is just so so CUTE <3<3<3. this is also why that jimmytimmy painting i did a while back has primarily those colors <3. it didn't fit the theme but timmy wanted them so he gets a green, hot magenta pink, and purple flowers for his suit so his only family that loves him can be there.
this is uhh kinda angst implied but it wouldn't be something i made without a bit of angst <3. timmy's biological family would not be there, his mother would probably call once she heard that he got married but timmy decided to abandon that life and those people for good, and for the better tbh. the rest of the nicktoons unite crew would be there + maybe their plus one ig, but dib instead of zim, or maybe them both (zim wants to look normal so attends these events where its expected u show up yk, and dib follows bc clearly. hehe). cindy would probably arrive and agree to being a bridesmaid to show she isnt homophobic but would probably cry and/or drink in a corner the whole time </3, losing both of her boyfriend prospects at once /j
when they toss the bouquet danny is the one who catches it.. he looks over to manny and they share a flustered look while everyone else cheers <3
this is how id imagine it to go at least, there might be more sketches of this in the future i just gotta clean em up first </3. aaah this post is so long </3. told u i loved this kinda stuff SHHSHUSH !! <3<3<3
#jimmytimmy#jimmy timmy power hour#timmy turner#jimmy neutron#danny phantom#spongebob squarepants#nicktoons unite#S☆K♡#art#clip studio paint#digital art#tigerghost#ask thingy
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Mer Legend/Link x gn!reader
back on my merman legend propaganda
progression of legend x reader, but with a strong focus on mer legend instead of hylian legend! won't have anything to do w/the chain, so he will simply be called link (though even then its used very little lol), and reader is a hylian native to legends hyrule :)
its prtty long, a lot of my rambles about him, but yk
hope you enjoy!
the first time you two meet he's in his mer form
youre in absolute DISBELIEF
youve been pretty sheltered most of your life, so you havent gone out and seen/experienced much, and now that you live by yourself you don't put any effort into learning about what everyone in the larger parts of hyrule think/know
you definitely dont think merfolk are real
AND YET heres this blonde haired mer, blinking up at you from the water
he looks just as shocked as you do
theres a lot of attempted gaslighting on his part
he isn't real, youre totally making him up, mer people?? nahhhh never
you, of course, don't believe him
he must realize he can swim away, because he does just that, leaving you hanging
it becomes a common thing, though, to stumble across this really odd mer
thankfully, over a lot of time, he starts to stick around a bit more and you guy get to talk
you learn his name is link, and that he's rather grumpy (though, maybe that's a bad word for it. tense and untrusting, maybe?)
he never answers ANY of your questions about what it's like to be a mer, and he'll often leave right after you ask him any questions
so, you learn not to ask questions!
instead, you talk about yourself, your interests, your family, your friends, just.. everything
the first few times, he doesn't seem to be really listening to anything you say. he's just collecting a lot of stuff off of the riverbed and stowing them away.
(the first time you ask what he's collecting he near growls, gets clearly embarrassed about that and promptly flees. you don't ask again)
either way, at some point he starts listening to you as he gathers materials.
he's not sure when he started to like listening to you talk, but it happened at some point and now he's come to look forward to it a lot
he gaslights himself into thinking its just funny to listen to your complaints when he's done and gone through so much. that it was just nice to be reminded that not everyone in hyrule is going through literal hell
it gets harder to convince himself that's his reasoning when he realizes he doesn't need to go back to the river near your house anymore
he doesn't want to go somewhere he doesn't need to, but eventually he gets super stressed by everything he has to deal with and decides thats a good enough excuse to go listen to some random person's ramblings
at that point, though, it's probably been weeks, so you've also stopped going
why would you go when the mer you liked talking.. uh.. to isn't there?
so, he shows up and is promptly bummed when he realizes you aren't there.
we all love link, i know, but you guys i fear he's a little dumb, so the thought of... taking the mermaid suit off never crosses his mind.
like he could take it off and just go knock on your door like a normal hylian would, but he could also depressingly lay on the riverbed like his lover has gone off to war and hasn't responded to any of his letters
anyway.
he repeats this a couple of times before deciding you've gotta come down eventually, right? and even he'll admit it at this point; he's starting to miss you
so everytime he comes, he'll bring an itty bitty shell of some sort and set it on the shoreline.
you think he's a mer, and he doesn't plan on telling you he isnt, so he might as well play into that
and hes right, eventually you do go down to the river and see the little pile of shells he's left you, like he's a bird waiting for his owner
you're definitely a bit surprised, but you collect the shells.
you go down early the next day with the shells in hand, a knife, and some string
as you wait to see if he'll turn up, you carve little holes into the shells and pull string through them
they're a bit too big for a necklace, unfortunately, but you can still make it into a decoration of some sort no issue.
he does show up eventually, and he gives you a smile when he sees you, which is probably one of the first youve seen from him. its small, but its meaningful
so anyway, you thank him for the shells, he gets a bit embarrassed and defensive, so you quickly move on
you start up the old routine of rambling on about different things
at first you had set your work aside to chatter, but unlike before when he would swim around while you talked and he gave idle, bland comments, now he sits with his arms crossed on the bank, head sitting on them and staring at you unnervingly
so, you pick the shells back up and keep working while he watches you
this guy does not realize he's acting weird in your eyes, so he remains where he is, tail and most of his upper body floating in the water, his chin and arms on the river bank
that becomes the new routine! eventually though, you do run out of shells to use and have to face his stare
for a minute the first time you stutter and choke on your words - you live in relative solitude, and, as aforementioned, you were relatively sheltered, so you really arent used to people paying such close attention to you and your words
you get by it though!
he does catch on at that point, and makes it a point to look away or start scratching random designs into the dirt under his hand whenever you end up stuttering again, which helps to get you more relaxed
he isn't really sure at what point during this he starts offering more about himself to you, but he does
his age, the fact that he's done a lot, how stressed he is (though, never the details) and other miscellaneous things, like his enjoyment of traveling and magic
youre thrilled to learn what you can about link
and after you find out about his tendency to hoard things, you offer the shells he gave you that you strung up back
he declines, and says that they were meant for you anyway, so you might as well keep them
i think thats when he realizes he must have developed some romantic feelings for you at some point, and just hadnt picked up on them
it definitely scares him at first
the last time he'd felt anything towards someone that he was confident he could label as being romantic, it was marin, and.. well..
so, yeah, it scares him off for a little bit.
you learned your lesson last time he disappeared, and still go down to the river pretty frequently.
anything that's not a house chore and can be done wherever starts to get done by the river, and that's just how it is now
he does come back eventually
he realizes that he knows damn well he isn't dreaming (though sometimes he isn't sure, but ever since all of that happened, hes never been too sure about anything)
he also decides that if this, if you, are a dream, maybe its a sign from Hylia herself to just kinda stop falling for people
so anyway, when he comes back he brings one of his necklaces with him. hes not sure if youll like it, or if youll wear it, but its really simple
just a black cord, and a small charm on it thats enchanted for protection
when he gives it to you, youre thrilled
maybe you wear jewelry a lot, maybe you dont, but either way its something easy to slip on and off and it's rather nondescript
plus its from link so of course you wear it
anyway, it snowballs from there and he starts gifting you random, small items
theyre either enchanted to protect you in some way, or they really are just random items
eventually YOU realize you like him too
for you i wanna say its an easy thing to accept. you like this silly, grumpy mer guy, and thats that
so youd confess first, probably after you confirm its not just a fleeting crush, and link probably glitches or something
anyway, you guys would totally have your first kiss with him awkwardly half out of the water and you on your knees crouched down
you fall in right afterwards, because the angle is so awkward
i think at this point he'd be worried you wouldnt like him once you find out hes not a merman, and he isn't really sure how youd react to him not being one, so i think he'd just show up at your door injured one night and panicking (though he won't say he's panicking)
you, also, panic before doing your best to help him
blah blah blah, he heals up, you guys talk about the fact that he is not, in fact, half fish, and you reassure him you dont only love him because hes half fish
thatd be silly of you
its something i think youd probably have to reinstate throughout your relationship with decreasing frequency over time
he never admits hes a bit insecure, but youve learnt to read his silent signals over time, so you can tell
he does appreciate it a lot, and he appreciates you even more
he's forever glad he decided on the river by your house to gather materials from
though, sometimes he still expects to wake up and find out it was all a dream (he never talks to you about that one, i fear)
idk might take this and do more with it, i kinda just rambled a loott and it all feels like it might be a decent template for a full fanfic but who knows!! not me, thats for sure LMAO
nsfw continuation here!
#gn reader#lu x reader#link x reader#lu legend x reader#mermaid legend#mer legend#no use of y/n#linked universe#requests open#ramblings of an obsessed woman 😌#legend of zelda#loz
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actively fighting a full blown panic attack born out of sadness and anger after having to drive by yet another victim on the side of the road
it makes me livid how accepted it is to just let cats suffer and die disgustingly horrid deaths and live awful short lives just so what, for what?? so you dont have to play with them for an hour a day??? when i was little it was just kinda normal that they disappeared at some point, i didnt understand what it actually meant until our outdoor cat i loved dearly was found in the bushes near our house in a condition so horrible my dad has never told me and i have never dared to ask, she only made it to 6 and had horrible scars and infections before that i allowed my family to convince me to let my first own cat outside, we only had her for a year, she died at only 2 years old, i am still suffering from the guilt, it has never let me go, she went missing for a week and i walked the entire vilage up and down every day, yelling her name, wandering into the forest alone, talking to every stranger i met until one morning my mom told me that our neighbour who works for the city asked if we had a white cat with a very specific collar she had- he found her on a busy road crossing in the next bigger city, i never even got to bury her, its haunting me, the thought of her wandering lost and scared in the city for a week until meeting an awful end gives me headaches, the fact that i was the last one to see her alive, that i put her outside bc we were late for school and had to leave quickly, that she had come home with oil in her fur from crawling through maschines and cars before, that i was worried but still didnt act, that it is my fault, any time i am up to late its coming back, it will never let me go, if i had stood my ground and not allow her outside unless on a leash or similar shed still be alive today, any time i read a description at our local shelter it comes back, they still advocate for outside cats, all of them, even if they have only been an indoor one before, its madness my older sister had a cat, i dont even know how old he got but it wasnt long either, he got hit by a car in front of their house, she has two now again and the only reason she hasnt let them outside is because they havent shown much interest in it, i tried to warn her before and she didnt listen and shes still resistent, even after losing one too
i have seen so many on the side of the road, anywhere i drive i see them, i cannot forget a single one, we are surrounded by farm land and all its giant maschinery, its still common to poison rodents, why do people value them so little, you wouldnt let your dog just live outside in the woods and streets for half the day or more, you wouldnt just throw your guniea pigs on the road and tell them have fun, you wouldnt just let your bird roam outside, there probably assholes that do that too but you cannot tell me its as common as outside cats
i dont understand it, i dont, i wont, i never will, i will never forgive myself this poor little animal that was my responsibility having to pay the price of my ignorance, or my own weakness letting my family convince me despite the awful way we lost one before, it makes me want to explode it hurts my brain in grief and anger i can barely contain
cats deserve to live a safe and long life, i get only having them inside may feel like you are locking them up, but do you think that not doing so is worth having them die a painful death? being poisonend? on purpose even by disgusting people that hate them? abused and chased by other animals and dogs? hurt and lost? cutting their lifespan in half? if they even make it that far? the amount of wildlife that they kill unnecessarily so when all of that is already in a steep decline everywhere? and if they eat what they hunt get infected with diseases or again, poison? die somewhere in agony? if cared for they dont care about going outside, plenty can be leash trained or given a secure way to roam like those cat proof aviary like things, if you dont want to put effort into caring for a cat DONT GET ONE, ALL pets require adequate care, and if you think cats are the easiest bc you only have to feed them every now and then IF they come home? you suck, you are an asshole, i hate you and you do not care about them, if you just want to occasionalyl feed and pet an animal go to the petting zoo
(this is about pet cats of people who can absolutely afford to keep them healthily inside, i know feral cats and those in poor neighbourhoods are a thing, even if not here where i live, and thats a whole other but still similar problem and not the point of this post)
#ganondoodles talks#personal#tw pet death#tw cat death#i hate everything so much and my day is ruined#sorry to come at you with this but its just#the grief and anger i feel for these poor things is more than their owners ever will feel im sure#just getting another one like its a consumable piece of candy#its so common here i hate it#why are people so insistent on it#the fact that the shelter here too advocates for outdoor cats in every cats description makes me twice as mad#do you actually care for them or do you hope they die quickly so people get one more frquently or what#i thought about writing them but i have had both of my cats from there and i am afraid they would not take it well#i dont know how to approach trying to make a change in this case#(my current cat is indoor only obviously and shes about 10 now- which is the oldest of any cats i have known has gotten)#this is germany specific btw ... if theres anyone that knows an organization trying to change this pls let me know
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