#and yes i could have handled it better

[inkskinned]

you were raised in comparison.

it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.

you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.

you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.

what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.

it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.

you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.

you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?

a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.

you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.

it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.

something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.

[welcometogrouchland]

I miss them so bad (Dick and Damian)

[killerandhealerqueen]

You know, when I go on instagram and read comments about Logan (idk why I do that it’s safer on tumblr for the most part), they always say he was a shit driver but it’s like…none of them want to acknowledge the fact that he was driving a SHITTY car made with parts from the previous year, making it heavier AND he didn’t have the same upgrades as Alex. He was making the best of a shitty situation. I don’t think anybody could have done better than him in that car, honestly. But it’s always easier to blame the driver rather than blame the team, right?

[cryptiduni]

“white mourning.”

[wraithsoutlaws]

i think theres a conversation to be had about how taash's story explores gender roles and transness in ways that could be seen as reductive but if your take away is "they could've given us a butch lesbian and instead we get THIS" about a canon nonbinary character i simply don't want to hear anything else you have to say about it

[aretarers]

i think my biggest character growth over the past 5-6 years? is being able to do this these days

[lecliss]

The choice from Sunday is kinda weird cuz the options are build a cage in the house for the bird or build a nest where it fell and one leads to the bird growing up but dying once its set free and the other one probably leads to it dying much sooner. They both feel like the same option and even tho obviously the most kind, caring, morally right thing to do is keep it inside so at least it lives longer even if it's in a cage. But like to me both options suck and are basically nothing cuz I'm sorry if I look like a bad person for this, but I'm not sorry, but I'm not fuckin touching a wild animal. Even if I knew it was there even if I bothered to check out the sound to find a bird, which I wouldn't, I'm not touching it. I'm not even getting close enough to find out it's too young to fly yet. Whatever happens to it happens man and I'll never know what happens to it cuz I'm not even gonna look at it. Like, where's the 'you seem like an asshole but really it's quite a normal choice' in this whole trial thing??? That's usually an option you can pick. Sunday!!! Sunday, listen!!! There are more than two choices!!! You don't have to always do something!!!! You can just walk away!!! You don't have to try to do something for everyone all the time!!! Think about yourself sometimes!!! It's not selfish I promise!!! SUNDAY!!! OH MY GOD HIS WINGS ARE COVERING HIS EARS HE CANT HEAR US!!!!

[autistic-katara]

there r fics that make u insane (so amazingly good it’s removed ur sanity) and then there’s fics that make u insane (you need to fistfight the author for how they did a specific thing that caused u to rant for hours)

[dirtytransmasc]

maybe it's because I'm in the "I'm so obsessed and hyperfocused on my little guys I will make any song seem like it's about them even if it couldn't be any father from actually relating to them at all" stage of my Theon and Asha hyperfixation but like...

I feel like 'I bet on losing dogs' by Mitski is about them.

it's about Asha and her relationship with Theon.

he's her baby brother. the baby brother who looked up at her smiled when she had gone in his room, intent on strangling him to stop his cries. he's her losing dog. the dog she keeps fighting for when no one else will. she never gives up on him, not truly, even when he is so clearly doomed, because she loves him, she won't give up on him.

and Theon is, in so many senses, a dog. he's been passed around from owner to owner, home to home, trained and beaten and domesticated, made to behave how his owner at the time sees fit. he's a good dog, a good beaten dog.

and now, in a way, he's Asha's dog. she doesn't want him to be her dog, she wants him to be her brother, and Theon's trying, he really is trying, she knows he's trying, but part of him will always be doomed to be a dog waiting to be hit, waiting for a command, waiting to be trained.

he's her losing dog, she knows it, knows he's doomed, deep down, there's little hope, he'll die a damned dog, but fuck it she doesn't care, he's her blood, her baby, he will be by her side no matter what. she'll always go back for him, she'll always fight for him, she'll always tell him to stay, she'll always give him a chance, she'll always try.

~~~~

[jrueships]

This is lowkey a stupid ass question but is your username jrue ships like different ships involving jrue or is it jrue’s hips 😭😭😭

yes !

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

[ficoandleo]

[Please convince your violent husband to use the sensory deprivation tanks at Darkwick General instead of committing crimes against his own body. I've already wrangled permissions for him to use them freely, he just needs to show up.]

@ask-doctor-isami

He starts to type 'He's not my husband' but concludes that it's besides the point and a waste of time to say. He knows who he means.

He hasn't done anything abnormally dangerous since then, but if I think he's acting strange again I'll see what I can do

Not that that BTH listens to me. But he might consider it more if I suggest it

On the other hand the more I think about it the more I don't know if leaving him alone with nothing but his thoughts is a good idea

He flies off the handle at random. He might just feel worse in there

Maybe he'll tell me why he doesn't like the idea at least

[malewifehenrycooldown]

man I sure wish one day I can play the original Deus ex…

[transingthoseformers]

Time traveling Roddy's gonna have a lot on his plate: Stopping Overlord from rampaging, making sure Luna 1 goes more smoothly than last time, trying to ensure Getaway DOESN'T go full on Starscream, just to name a few. In short, he has his hands full to say the least.

Exactly

I'm very very torn on how the Getaway stuff would go besides it being different. Because I feel like Getaway might zero in on not liking Rodimus a lot earlier than in canon thanks to Rodimus's attitude towards the mech already being quite poisoned (via now knowing about the future treason and danger he puts Rodimus's mecha in)

I like to think that Rodimus is a better mech at the start of round two than he was in the initial timeline, which causes interesting results (especially with his dynamic within LL Command)

Trying to puzzle out ways that Rodimus can find out about Overlord without it being suspicious, because I feel like he's going to try to hide that he's done so much of this before. But rarely do things go smoothly with Overlord involved.

[menstits]

Still thinking about the anon from yesterday and the more i think about it the more mad i get like you're insane for calling kaeya mid i hope you blow up. Bitching in the tags ft arguments my smart sexy boyfriend brought up yesterday while we were talking about this so credit where credit is due

[frankdelfino]

derek in s2 going around and turning vulnerable teens into werewolves, training them day in and day out, hoping and praying for a scott 2.0 only for isaac and erica to get their asses whooped in every fight… he was truly one derek pack ass whooping away from sending scott a gift basket with a card attached reading please join my fucking pack we’re dying out here