#and yeah i know they are all adults and all im not saying someone in their mid 20s and late 30s can't be together its a personal preference
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1. Rick for sure, I like everyone in the family tho ! My favorite specific Rick's are Toxic(because he's awful and very very short sighted, idk i just think he's interesting in a sopping wet pathetic way.) and Flesh Curtains era(because let's be real how am I going to look at a 30 something grungey drunk and not be obsessed. thats like, some of my favorite people irl.)
2. I don't think it matters! Probably space beth, but eh 🤷♀️
3. No not canonically. I think it'd be really fun tho and I like all the theories. Ricks do mess around tho, hes a horndog and the citadel exists, a huge conglomeration of Him, i think it happens more often then it seems to.
4. Tilda. I will not elaborate.
5. Errh idk! A lot i guess. Theyve said before they want the like, classic adult cartoon run time(think futurama, family guy, simpsons), so as many seasons as humanly possible if the writers get their way. I think they step on their own toes a little since they seem to toggle between wanting to be an episodic sitcom, but ALSO a serial scifi thriller. I dont think theyve done badly in that regard so far, but theres absolutely aspects of both that are suffering because of the other's presence.(plot inconsistencies n that kinda thing.)
6. Smash, it would be a bad decision for both of us, but itd be fun !
7. Does the galactic federation count? Probably not since its an organization, but for sure that one. Super interesting stuff u can do with space bureaucracy(bc im boring) and state-sponsored violence. But as for an individual, I really really like Beths mytholog, that whole concept is really cool, and her design is hella badass lol. Also i guess Toxic Rick is a villain too !
8. oof I've tried to figure this out and i dont think i can narrow it down, but i really like Rattlestar Ricklactica, Vat of Acid, and a Rickle in Time.
9. uhh idk the one with the giant incest baby? I didn't enjoy Story Train either tbh. I don't think any of the episodes are like, unwatchably bad, but theres absolutely a few I skip when i rewatch the show.
10. I don't care about story lord like, at all. hes just. deeply uninteresting. Not a huge fan of Mr. Poopybutthole, but i think i just thought we were reminded of him too often.(i liked the intervention episode well enough tho)
11. Oh man this is hard to answer cuz hes just done So Much. Like, guys a shithead. The reckless disregard for innocent bystanders is pretty bad. I think it sucks when he orchestrates situations in which morty has to lethally defend himself, and then totally disregards his feelings(which is literally all the time lmfao). like, the kids 14. His casual manipulation of Beth is super fucked, cuz he knows how much he means to her and he exploits that. yeah idk, guys just a pos all around lol
12. Dated question, luckily no! I think the new voice actors are great :3
13. All the rnm blogs i follow are badass as hell. idk how to pick ill prob edit this l8r
14. Can I say rick without sounding like a total loser. mentally ill, substance abuse issues, ruled entirely by emotions, hedonistic while paradoxically engaging in self-harm/hatred. nihilistic(silly flavor). freaked out by commitment/attachment. the party friend(as opposed to someone you invite for brunch or to meet ur parents). also science is cool.
15. the entire "...couldn't let a dead snake be dead even after it bit his ankle, next time stay in the fucking car!" monologue. and the "a vat of fake acid are you Dying of Dementia?!" fight.
16. i havent finished my brackets yet ill get back to you.
17. same as above.
18. man idk probably. i dont actually watch it in a way that supports them(financially) anyway, but that would suck balls cuz its a fixation of mine.
19. done to death probably but mortys "come watch tv?" quote is my fave. it reads to me as incredibly reassuring. optimistic nihilism. like, "nothing means anything, nothings a big deal, lets chill and enjoy it while we can." ya know? like dying is the same as before you were born, and Everyones gonna do it, but we're here together right now, so lets eat pasta and get a little drunk.
20. i know hes doing his own thing but can i be snowball. hes cool and empathetic and capable of growth, also i wanna see how the dog utopia is going.
20 SHORT-ANSWER* RICK AND MORTY QUESTIONS FOR YOU:
*You can write long answers, if you'd like! Feel free to skip questions, too!
Who is your favourite Rick and Morty Character?
Which Beth is the clone: Domestic Beth or Space Beth?
Do you think that Rick-C137 and Rick Prime were previously romantically involved?
What do you think would be a good name for Birdperson and Tammy's daughter?
How many seasons do you think Rick and Morty will eventually have?
Rick C-137: smash or pass?
Who is your favourite Rick and Morty villain?
Your favourite Rick and Morty episode?
Your least favourite Rick and Morty episode?
Who is your least favourite Rick and Morty character?
What is, in your opinion, the worst thing that Rick C-137 has ever done?
Do you think that Rick and Morty will be affected substantially by having to change the voice actor for Rick and Morty and a bunch of other characters?
What's a good Rick and Morty blog?
Who is the Rick and Morty character that you relate to the most?
The funniest Rick and Morty bit/scene, in your opinion?
Best Rick and Morty season?
Worst Rick and Morty season?
Would you stop watching the show if Justin Roiland returned?
Your favourite Rick and Morty quote?
If you had to be one member of the smith family in the next season, who would you want to be?
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Okay Cal I’ve taken some time and calmed down and now I’m so very normal about this news. Nico’s back well isn’t that nice. I feel so very casual about that. Just :) so :) normal :)
First theme this round is non-human Buddie!
🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲 (IM OBSESSED WITH THIS ONE!!!! Really loving Buck’s hearing loss story and can’t wait to see where you take it! And I’ve got Thoughts™️ about how it might play into the Diaz family magic… It seems like you’re doing the publish once it’s all written thing again - how many chapters are you planning on having?)
🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️(IM INTRIGUED!! And lol this emoji has bracelets on the arm that totally reminded me of Buck’s line arm tattoo so it’s meant to be! There’s so many interesting directions I feel like this one could go and I’m very excited to watch it play out!)
-PCA <3
HI PCA! So happy you're so excited for Nico.
In the meantime, the creature fics!
96 for 🌲 (THANK YOU!!!!! That makes me so happy. I'm really pumped for this one. I want to hear your thoughts! Yes, publishing this once it's all done. I have a ten chapter outline!)
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It’s not for very long. Buck said the appointment shouldn’t take more than an hour, plus driving. No biggie. Eddie can handle that. He’s an adult.
He tells himself the fear is that when he’s alone, something will happen. He’ll cover his house in more leaves and turn more and more into an animal until he loses his human mind. His back will become completely hollow like in all his nightmares. He thinks his fears are rooted in pragmatism. But when Buck is actually gone, the truth of it becomes clear.
It’s painful.
Buck being gone is actually physically painful for Eddie. He doesn’t know why. He gets this ache all over his body. This gripping sense of panic and nausea combined. He can hardly function. He needs Buck to be back. He needs to not be alone. His brain sort of abandons reason and starts spiraling to some dark place where he’s forever shut out from any sort of human interaction forever. Where he is utterly isolated.
He doesn’t just think of Buck. He thinks of Christopher, hating him. His team at work, thinking he abandoned them. Adriana, missing without a trace. Shannon, dead. He starts to shake. It feels like some sort of withdrawal; or at least what he imagines that would feel like. He needs some sort of company. Anyone. Anything. Most of all, he needs Buck to come home.
There’s a knock on the door around the time Eddie is expecting Buck to get back. If Eddie was in his right mind, he would know it’s not Buck. He would know the door is unlocked, and Buck can walk in. He would know that Buck has keys, regardless.
Throwing aside any sort of precaution or rational thought, Eddie hurries to open the door. He doesn’t have much in the way of a disguise to conceal himself. He’s still wearing Buck’s sweatpants. Nothing for his face. He doesn’t even think about it. What he must look like to someone who isn’t expecting to see it.
He’s surprised to see that it’s Tommy at the door. Arms crossed, angry impatient look on his face. Tommy, Buck’s boyfriend. He’s probably here for Buck. But he’s Eddie’s friend, too. Maybe he can keep Eddie company until Buck gets back.
Not single thought of his own protection in his head, Eddie throws open the door.
“Hey, Tommy,” he says. “What’s up, man?”
Tommy looks furious and confused. He looks Eddie over, eyes scrunching with confusion.
“Where’s Evan?” He demands. He blinks a few times. Rubs one of his ears. “I know he’s with you and… And I…”
“Buck isn’t here right now. Should be soon. Do you want to come inside?”
“Do I…” Tommy’s eyes sort of glaze over. It’s like watching drugs settle in. The anger all but evaporates from his face. “Yeah, Eddie. Of course I want to come in.”
Eddie is pleased. That’s good. He didn’t want to be alone anymore. He can already feel the pain in his body beginning to subside.
“Come on, man. I’ll get you a beer,” Eddie says. No matter that it’s eleven in the morning.
“I’d love that,” Tommy says.
He leads Tommy inside towards the kitchen. He grabs two beers from the fridge. He doesn’t think about the tail creating a strange bulge in the back of his pants. He doesn’t think of the fact that he’s wearing Tommy’s boyfriend’s pants. He doesn’t think of anything and Tommy’s not reacting to anything. It all must be fine.
When he turns around to hand Tommy the beer, Tommy takes a step towards him, leaving very little room between him and the fridge. Eddie feels a bit cornered.
“Uh, hi?” Eddie asks. He tries to give Tommy the beer but Tommy doesn’t take it. Won’t even look at it.
“Eddie, I think we should talk,” Tommy says.
Eddie gets a bad feeling.
“Okay… Uh, sure. About what?”
“Us,” Tommy says.
Eddie coughs a little. “Us?”
“You and me,” Tommy says.
“What you and me?” Eddie asks.
Tommy smirks a little. “What we could be to each other.”
Eddie blinks. “Uh… Friends? Friends with someone very important in common?”
Eddie might be feeling a little out of it lately, but he’s not insane.
“Oh, come on, Eddie,” Tommy says. “You had to know there was something between us. If you hadn’t been seeing that woman. What was her name?”
“Marisol?” He asks. Or Kim? Both? Jesus, he’s a mess.
---
66 for 🧜♂️ (YAY! Thank you! I am excited to reveal my - and Annie's - plans):
---
He knows that it changes you. In lots of strange ways, some small and some large.
“I’d had an accident not too long before that,” Chimney says. “Nearly died, myself. But… I don’t know. It’s different for Buck. Especially about Bobby. I think he’s just jealous you’re the new, shiny person on the team.”
Eddie is hardly new and shiny. Buck just doesn’t know that.
Eddie nods. “I’ll… Well, I’ll try I guess. To get on his good side or whatever.”
“I don’t think he has a bad side,” Hen says. “Just be patient. He’ll come around.”
Eddie holds onto this promise. Hopes that it’s true. And really, really hopes his suspicions aren’t correct.
🌻
Things get worse.
There’s some downtime in the shift. Eddie decides to hit the station gym. Unfortunately, Buck is already there with Chimney. He considers turning around and walking away, not wanting to deal with the guy more than he needs to. But he doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction. He doesn’t want to be scared off in his own workplace. Not again.
So Eddie starts on the other side of the equipment from Buck. The punching bag. He gets a conversation started up with Chimney. They talk about the firefighter calendar, which Chimney wants a spot in. Something Buck doesn’t seem thrilled about. It’s clear Buck wants to win, from all the absurd selfies he’s been snapping.
“Are you gonna submit photos, Eddie?” Chim asks. “Be honest, you’ve probably got washboard abs under that shirt. You submit one of those classic shirtless suspenders photos and you’re a shoe in.”
Ha. No. Abs? Sure. A shirtless photo? No way.
Across the gym, Buck makes a frustrated noise. Mutters something under his breath. Eddie doesn’t hear it, but he gets the tone. And all he can hear is the sound of someone suggesting he isn’t man enough for the competition. Whether or not it’s what Buck says, it’s what Eddie takes in.
So he sort of snaps.
“What’s your problem, man?” He demands, marching over to Buck at the weights.
Buck looks up at him. He seems surprised to have been confronted. Surprised, but not unwilling to rise to the bait. He stands up, gets close to Eddie, peacocking his considerable height. He’s not that much taller than Eddie, but it sure feels like it, in this moment.
“Okay. You.” Buck says, voice low and tight. “You’re my problem. Your comfort level.”
Eddie’s comfort level? Is he serious? He’s been doing everything he can to make Eddie uncomfortable. Is Eddie, what? Supposed to know his place? Stay silent and in the background because he’s different? How does Buck even know that he’s different?
“You’re-you’re not supposed to walk in here like you’ve been here for years,” Buck keeps going. “It’s meant to be a getting-to-know-you period. You’re meant to respect your elders.”
“You’re not his elder, Buck,” Chimney interjects.
“I don’t know how old you are,” Eddie replies. “But I’m not a probie. I’ve been a firefighter-paramedic for six years. But if you have some sort of prejudice that makes you think I’m not fit for the job-”
“Wait, what?” Buck interrupts. “Prejudice?”
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she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let
and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment
and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.
and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment
and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?
to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.
and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.
you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.
#this btw is not including toxic friendships this is legit just something ive experienced MANY times now#writeblr#you ever have a friend in one of those relationships where ur like#u don't HATE their partner explicitly#but ur like. what the fuck y'all#like the weird part of being an adult is that you can't be like . CERTAIN their relationship is toxic#and also if u move too fast or push too hard u can hurt someone who is already in a scary situation so you just are like#frozen there. laughing awkwardly. saying ''haha..... yeah..... couldn't be me....''#and like u can't tell - is this banter or does he actually think like. he's better than her.#all you can do is be there for your friend and hope they wake up to it#or ... that it really IS good#and it's just odd to you#tbh btw id rather have my friends feel safe coming to me if they have a concern about my relationship#like yes it's not ur business but it also IS bc im making u hang out with them and also ur my friend#it's a weird thing to experience as an adult bc it is such a blurry line and when u spend time#around couples that aren't like ACTUALLY ur friends but instead ''extended friend circle'' ur like#.... i don't know y'all well enough and he just called you a cow. and ur okay with that . and i don't know how to respond.#so ur like :) okay. um. go to couple's counselling i think#but also you are NOT supposed to pass judgement so it's like.... this weird limbo of feeling like you SHOULD say something#but knowing you CANNOT#idk that there's a way to resolve it!!!!!!!! it's probably a different approach person to person#edited my tags bc tumblr's new system fucked em up#PS EDIT: btw i should have said:#the pronouns in this can work in any and every direction. every gender and every sexuality and every#type of relationship tbh. even non-romantic relationships where ur like ''what do u mean ur bff calls u stupid''
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Decided against romancing wyll because I feel like he's too young for my character, another chapter in the birdy is extremely fickle about romance in games saga...more at 11
#after i learned hes only 24 and ive been thinking of ellis as being in his late 30s i was like eh.#and yeah i know they are all adults and all im not saying someone in their mid 20s and late 30s can't be together its a personal preference#birdy plays bg3#could even change my mind on this#also if you factor in elf bullshit hes probably like 65 really 😭#being 27 myself im like i couldnt imagine dating someone whos almost 40 at that age 😭😭
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"bedrotting is a privilege because i dont have the time to bed rot. when i get home from work im excited that i get to bed rot" Do yall know what that word means
#like srsly#idk if i can rlly talk for this#bcos everytime theres conversation abt this it has to do with paying bills and all that#and i dont have to do that yet#but like for me i spent months almost always in bed#i wasnt even on my phone most of the time#i just lied there thinking abt how to kms and occasionally crying or sleeping#and i got rlly behind in school bcos i didnt do anything for months#and it rlly did fuck up my life#heavily#so idk for all the “bed rotting is a privilege” discourse#i see so many ppl talking abt it like it's just relaxing#and if yall are going to argue abt this can yall atleast know what it means??#like sure yall can have that conversation but atleast know what youre talking abt#and also is it even smthn worth talking abt#idk if it's mean but like what's the point in pointing out that bedrotting is a privilege if it is??#like genuinely#and also alot of the discourse runs on the idea that it doesnt mess up anyone's life and while im not completely sure if i count#bcos im not an adult that pays bills#but like idk i think it does#ik most discourse is stupid#but i dont understand the point of that one anyway#like yeah i guess?? maybe?? if we're assuming that the depressed or disabled person doesnt have their life completely fucked up by it#maybe??#idk. who does it help by saying that a person who can hardly get out of bed is privileged#maybe there is a point to it that im just not thinking of rn#and im sorry for being rlly shortsighted if i am#but like??#i dont understand someone being unable to bedrot bcos itd fuck up their life? bcos like?? yeah that's what it does#maybe i have the wrong definition here bcos im seriously confused
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If I had to describe the mood, it really is like when you grow up with an abusive parent; and there are bad days where you're just willing for them to go to work and be gone all day so you don't have to hear them yelling and slamming shit
#That plus mixed with like#Slightly more adult feelings of unspoken resentment bubbling under the surface#And complicated webs of need#Like I need a place to live - so as not to be homeless#You need - idk question mark? To feel heard and valued#Okay but like talking down to the adults in the house and plus the eighteen year old#Talking to everyone in an insulting babying voice#Because youre JUST TRYING TO BE CLEAR#It sucks man#Its been all weekend and yeah I was just like please go to work please go to work#And like I love my sister and my nieces but this environment is nothing but passive and active harm#And micro- to macro-aggression masquerading as control#And like when is the breaking point?#You really like.#Lose a LOT of your goodwill and empathy even for someone you love#When they react the same harmful ways that#Even the youngest child has pointed out is harmful! is negative! makes them feel bad!#But they just keep acting and lashing out bc they arent being heard#Bc SHES tired SHE didnt sleep SHES anxious she#You know?#Like to make your reactions to stimulus everyone in the houses triggers is#And to not try to find outlets to help make things better for everyone#Rather to say every time IM SUCH A BITCH IM SOOO SORRY. I SHOULD JUST. STOP. TALKING#Fuck man#I need my own space#(I need to drive off a bridge)#I just need to find a space away from all of this drama in this house man#Sorry this is a lot but i wouldnt be able to express this much feeling to anyone#Nor do I feel like I have a right to inflict my stupid bullshit life problems and whiny emo shit on anyone#Long tags are long
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there is nothing strictly heterosexual about the way leon looks at other men, i swear
#resident evil#imagine if a line was added along the lines of#'chris is hot and all but ada'#i saw that one image of leon looking at patrick from infinite darkness and#look i'll still headcanon leon as being extremely bad at socializing either due to neurodivergency or him suffering massive trauma#as a fresh adult#flirting with mfers and not understanding why cuz he's no good with social cues#unintentionally#but i know long time fans gotta think the same thing#leon kennedy is hot as fuck and every gender across the board wants to bang him right#if my guy was a lil bi it'd be dope yknow idk#he can still be loyal to ada and casually admit men are hot yknow#yknow im just saying#dedicates his life to one woman doesn't mean he can't have a lil crush on christopher redfield#the fans have valid reasons to smack their lil dolls of leon and chris together to make em kiss#but i mean if anyone's got a strong theory of being gay it is chris hell yeah#chris = gay 100#leon = 'straight' but someone didn't measure properly cuz that line is a bit fucked up#which is to say maybe bi cuz it feels like he's mostly into women but got a way he looks at guys sometimes yknow... yknow#i need to go take a nap man
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The Thoughts(c) are getting to me so I should probably go to bed but I have to say hmm maybe I should go to therapy
#teach says#not that im feeling at my lowest#im not im okay even if a bit frustrated#but i havent been to therapy in a while and the therapist ive had until now only focuses on issues related to childhood and family#they helped me so much and im grateful for that but ive kinda outgrown my problems at this point#which is good!#but i feel like i should look for someone that can help me put things in perspective in my adult and neurodivergent years#i clearly dont really know how to Feel stuff so i keep getting to a point every few months where all the negative emotions come together#and create the Final Breakdown (to the tune of the final countdown)#like now theres the dentist#the fact that i couldnt go on vacation#my friends live far#and then other stuff#and it doesnt matter if its big or small it will always combine like a megazord and come bite me in the ass#and then i become insufferable and i cry for a week straight without solving anything!!!!!!!#like bro i have zero free time i need to stay focused i cant just randomly cry in the office and not even know why!!!!!!!!!!!!#thats unprofessional as hell!!!!!!!!!!!#and i dont even know why im doing that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah#except having zero free time also means having no time to go to therapy#much to thonk about
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good evening to everyone except a certain few fucking anons
#go fuck yourselves like seriously what the fuck#im so sick of this#this is about the last two anons by the way. i havent gotten any more because i turned off anon asks#if you wanna know why anon asks are off blame those two assholes#seriously that stupid shits been getting to my head#you know why? because every fucking person around here (especially my mum) LOVES to criticise me and accuse me of victimising myself#literally every fucking thing i do is wrong around here down to my hair#all these fucking adults like to bully me about MY hair#fuck you if i want bangs I'll keep the bangs#literally it seems like they're just doing whatever they can to change me into someone else. someone they want#this fucking culture of mine is so shitty i swear to god#like they think that BULLYING you is people being honest with you#and that if someone's nice to you theyre shittalking you behind your back#(honestly considering some of the people i see i wouldn't be surprised)#and im not even doing anything thats WRONG either. im different and not one of these people can tolerate that#yeah my mum sent me a video of a goat with curly hair and implied she thinks my bangs are like that. in a derogatory manner btw#so yeah that's had me pissed and then the fucking anons were also making me pissed#fuck you I'm gonna be as selfish as i want when i post on MY blog#this blog is MINE#I decide what i write and how much i wanna shittalk someone who upset me to get my feelings out. if anyone wants to call me selfish fuck you#and you know what? fuck That Person too. they geniunely messed me up more than they helped me#yes. im still gonna talk about them. im still gonna complain because FUCK YOU I NEED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW OKAY#I NEED THIS SHIT OUT OF ME AND IT GETS BACK INTO MY HEAD SO I NEED IT OUTSIDE#and fuck you anons who gave your unwanted opinion. if you cant say anything nice SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS#i was taken advantage of and manipulated#and apparently I'm the bad guy for small mistakes like excuse me#and then that person even told a friend of theirs once to attack me (over text) like what#i just cant anymore it needs to be fucking out#and im not sorry for complaining about this because this is my blog and i will complain on here. this blog is for ME. for MY happiness.#and as such i will fucking complain shit and i will fucking post my vents because thats the only way i can send these emotions off for good
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promare fans were so intense abt how they thought gueira and meis felt abt galo but forgot the probably most realistic adult feelings of ‘this guys my friends boyfriend’. i know its not as Drama Filled as whatever ppl were tryingto do that wasnt in character (w lio and galo at least, we dont rly know enough abt guemeis but its safe to assume) but its kind of funny imo. at least at the start. untapped potential
#IMNOT SAYING THIS LIKE IM AGAINST THEM BEING FRIENDS OR ANYTHING AT ALL#BUT U ALL KNOW MY FEELINGS ON THE 'OVERPROTECTIVE GUEMEIS LIKE EVERYONE HERE ISNT A FUCKING ADULT' THING#also i thiink its rly funny if they start out like yeah that sure is our buddys boyfriend#we dont rly know him but he seems cool i guess. lio trusts and likes him and we trust and like lio so#LIKE IDK. HOW MANY OF UR OWN FRIENDS PARTNERS DO U HAVE SUPER STRONG OPINIONS ON#EVEN IF U DONT LIKE THEM VERY MUCH#but when u first start getting to know ppl its not like u Know. maybe someone rubs u the wrong way#but the overprotective towards their boss thing was so gbfhgbhhghf THESE MEN R ADULTS.#and its not like galo was w the foundation and gueira and meis like.. saw him working w lio#when they first met galo he was just the firefighter unknowingly aiding in their plan to get captured by FF on purpose#they probably didnt have super strong feelings abthim. THEN THEY SAW HIM LATER IN A CAVE. THRILLING#promare
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fh fandom back to wishing death on a fictional teenager for being mentally ill and not learning how to cope with that in a healthy way. what else is new
#do i think klck is correct? no#do i think a fandom full of grown adults should stop holding this (manipulated) (not sound of mind) teenager to wack standards? ya#like.... some of you are... how do i say this.... ~projecting~#and dont get me wrong this isnt me trying to say shes some kind of innocent misunderstood blorbo 🥺🥺🥺#i think shes a freak and a cunt. but im going to be normal about it and NOT say that she deserves to be killed (????)#pre-overtaking she was clearly aware that her behavior wasn't healthy#the fact she even went to jawbone at all (and was honest with him!) proves that imo#personally i feel like she might be neurodivergent -> struggling with knowing which rules to break and which ones to not#we literally JUST had an episode where the principal of AAA told students to their face that studying and working hard is dumb#i think kipperlilly came to aguefort. couldn't get a grip on what they Actually wanted from her#(parents went to mumple. she couldnt have been prepared for aguefort)#and out of frustration she fixated on people who were doing well and compared herself to them#and the only major surface difference she could find? tragic backstories#it only makes sense that she'd assume that THAT is what was missing. her inability to adapt to AAA was out of her control#so instead of blaming smth abstract (neurodivergence/other mental illness)#this single. concrete. and obvious difference is way easier to latch on to#but yeah. imo she just reads as someone super neurodivergent who received No Help because she 'made do'#and when thrown into a situation that required a skillset she wasn't born with. she shut down and got defensive#noone is born wanting to die yadda yadda#i think it's very interesting that when jawbone turned the question around on her (asking what SHE could do to get better)#she got quiet and awkward#its almost like she was trying her best? and just couldn't figure out where to go next?#and OH would you look at that. jace offering her a trip to the mountains of chaos. for a ~super dangerous adventure~#🙄#anyway.#awfully convenient. isn't it.#this has been me. having takes on ms goldendoodle shibainu#goodnight everyone (its noon)#not tagging this out of fear of the *** stans out there who will not stop taking things personally
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nothin prompted this on here but. not to be dramatic but if one more 14 yr old on discord calls me (grown adult man) "kid" ill morph into a lampshade can they just not. it feels so weird when ppl younger than me do that like i get yall do it as endearment but PLEASE im AN ADULT !! /lh who tf r yall gonna call kid in ur life anyway u cant even by energy drinks or go to see the fnaf movie like calm down..
#gen like even if ur my friend plz try not to call me kid or whatever it feels. infantalizing#and i know no one means it that way but#growin up autistic and with “childish” interests and ways of reacting ppl calling me a child or kid or whatever is so. eugrgh#also btw. as a man who has been through some shit online#its NEVER a good idea to present yourself as more mature than the adults around you because you never know who will latch onto you#i was used as a helpline from the ages of 14-16 and it was traumatising all because i was seen as more mature and able to handle it#its. yeah#like not saying everyone is like that but#idk my own two (very biased and traumatised) cents on the matter#be all end all is dont talk down to me at all#also if anyone acts like that on anon and u dont sign off as someone i know i might just block you#i block very freely so if u just annoy me too much ur gone.#if any of my friends go “oh im scared i annoy you too much” ill eat your fucking sofa this isnt about u here close ur eyes gang /lh#and again. NOTHING PROMPTED THIS POST OTHER THAN SOME ANNOYING KIDS ON A DIFFERENT PLATFORM#vent i guess?? more complaining#jack's hawkin the headlines !!
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This anon comment has sent me, I'm dying from laughter at this blatant troll bait. There's just so much going on, from the moment I saw the anon was called "your mom" I knew I was in for a time.
My version of Kusanali is first mentioned in chapter 13 (which is the chap this comment is on) which means theoretically this person read 100k words of Sandrone being a dog boy, Signora not being the Crimson Witch, Capitano just being an old sailor man, Pierro being an eboy, etc, before reading me just MENTIONING my version of Kusanali, which was written months before she came out (or was even leaked) and that is where they draw the line. This anon who "likes things to be canon" haha.
I just, its so funny and with the user name they aren't even hiding the fact that they are a troll. Also the fact that they are weirdly polite, it was such a baffling comment to read first thing in the morning. I wish I could know what went through this persons head, I'm so curious if anything here is remotely genuine.
My current theory is that they saw my art of my version of the dendro archon and then did a control f sort of thing because considering its about Kusa (and using her full title at that), its probably some racist bait because I drew her darker then a sheet of paper. But in my heart I would like to think they really did read up until that point and will continue reading because it brings me joy haha.
#smfwtwd#fic stuff#avem rambling#i just can't#im not even bothered at all because its just sooooo ridiculous#and the how weirdly nice it is other then the obvious racist implications#like I'm not going to respond because I'm a mature adult who knows not to feed the trolls#but by god am I so curious about this person#got to say this is probably my first trolling comment and can't complain#well ok there was that one time someone out of no where got weirdly political#and accidentally while attempting to be progressive used right wing rhetoric#but they obviously weren't trolling me and were obviously a teenager not thinking things through#but yeah other then that everyones comments have been lovely#thanks again!
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IF LORE UPDATES APPLIED TO PEOPLE I WOULDVE JUST GOTTEN ONE OF MY HAPPIEST LORE UPDATES TODAY
#FUCK YEAH WE GOT MY FIRST EVER MURAL LOOKING SICK AS SHIT SO FAR#TORTUGA AS BIG AS ME AND DETAILED ENOUGH THAT STRANGERS COMPLIMENTED IT MY BELOVED#HUGE SHOUTOUT TO THE GUY DRIVING BY THAT ROLLED DOWN THEIR WINDOW AND SHOUTED “dude that’s amazing!” AS THEY PASSED#CAME OUT AS TRANS TO MY AUNT THAT IM PAINTING THE MURAL FOR AND SHE IS NOW OFFICIALLY MY FIRST BLOOD RELATIVE TO BE SUPPORTIVE OF ME OUT TH#GATE#HER ONLY THINGS WERE THAT SHE WASNT GONNA BE PERFECT ABOUT MY PRONOUNS AND THAT SHE WISHED ID COME OUT TO HER SOONER SO I WOULDNT HAVE#GOTTEN ATTACHED TO A NAME THAT I DIDNT REALIZE WAS LINKED TO MY REALLY SHITTY BIO DAD AND WANTED TO COME UP WITH A GENDER NEUTRAL NICKNAME#FOR ME THAT WOULD WORK NO MATTER WHAT I IDENTIFY AS FROM HERE ON OUT AND WORKS AROUND PEOPLE IM NOT OUT TO#AND SHE GAVE ME A CHAMORRAN NICKNAME!!!! A SIDE OF MY HERITAGE THAT I DONT GET TO CONNECT TO A TON!!! SHES GONNA CALL ME TAKKA (WE MESSED#WITH THE SPELLING OF “TOCA” A BIT TO SOUND LIKE “TALK-A” SO WE CAN MAKE JOKES ABOUT HOW I TALK A LOT IT HAS BEEN SO FUCKING FUNNY SO FAR I#LOVE IT)#AND SHES GONNA TEACH ME HOW TO MAKE KELAGUEN (A CHAMORRAN DISH) SOMETIME#AND SHE GAVE ME AN OVERSIZED SHIRT THAT BASICALLY SAYS FUCK T-MOBILE#AND TOLD ME SHE LOVED ME NO MATTER WHAT AND TOLD ME THAT SHE LOVED HOW I PRIORITIZED KINDNESS ABOVE ALL ELSE AND I GOT TO TELL HER ABOUT HO#I THINK KINDNESS AND CRUELTY ARE TRAITS BEYOND GENDER AND SEXUALITY AND THAT I WANT TO BECOME THE ADULT I NEEDED AS A KID AND THAT I NEEDED#SOMEONE KIND THAT FREELY GAVE HUGS AND TOLD A LOT OF SILLY JOKES AND WAS FORGIVING WHEN IT COUNTED AND THAT WHEN I GROW OLD WHETHER IM AN#OLD MAN OR OLD WOMAN OR OLD SOMETHING ELSE I WANNA BE A GEEZER THAT LIVES ACROSS THE STREET THAT YOU CAN PLAY CARDS WITH ANYTIME AND#SAVES YOU CHOCOLATE BECAUSE THEY KNOW YOU LIKE IT AND I WANNA BE THE TYPE OF KIND MAN LITTLE GIRLS GROW UP HOPING ARE REAL AND LABELS ARE#CLOTHES THAT SOMETIMES FIT A MONTH OR FIT FOREVER BUT WHAT MATTERS IS THAT THEYRE COMFY IN THE MOMENT AND THAT I JUST WANNA BE HAPPY AND I#LOVE PEOPLE FOR THEIR PERSONALITY AND IM WEIRD ABOUT KISSING BUT I HAVE MY PARTNERS BACK AND THAT MATTERS MORE TO US AND WERE HAPPY#AND I TOLD HER WHAT IM PLANNING ON MY NAME TO BE WHEN IM AN ADULT AND SHE LIKED MY IDEA FOR MY NEW SURNAME#AND WE SANG TO SONGS TOGETHER AND BITCHED ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND AND DID A LITTLE JIG IN THE STREET AND LAUGHED TOGETHER AND SHE WAS SO HAPPY#BECAUSE OF THE TURTLE IM PAINTING HER AND BECAUSE I TRUST HER AND IM SO HAPPY BECAUSE BOTH OF THOSE ARE WORKING OUT AND THIS EVENING WAS A#PERFECT SUMMER EVENING TO BE ALIVE. THIS MAY HAVE HAPPENED ON MY PERIOD BUT WHAT THE FUCK EVER THE GOOD OUTWEIGHS THE BAD. THERE IS BEAUTY#IN THE WORLD IF YOU KNOW WHERE TO LOOK. THERE IS BEAUTY IN BEING TRANS AND BEING SAFE WITH YOUR AUNT AND TALKING TO HER HONESTLY ABOUT YOUR#HOPES FOR THE FUTURE WITH YOUR BODY AND YOUR GENDER. THERE IS BEAUTY IN MAKING SILLY POSES WITH YOUR MURAL IN PROGRESS WITH YOUR AUNT AS TH#PHOTOGRAPHER. THERE IS BEAUTY IN LISTENING TO NOSTALGIC MUSIC WITH YOUR AUNT THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE WOULD PROBABLY MAKE FUN OF YOU FOR LIKING#THERE IS BEAUTY IN WEARING YOUR BANGS UP IN A STUPID PINEAPPLE PONYTAIL SO IT DOESNT FALL IN YOUR EYES AND WEARING CLOTHES YOU DONT CARE#ABOUT AND GRINNING AND LAUGHING AND SINGING MORE ENTHUSIASTICALLY AND GENUINELY THAN YOU HAVE IN A LONG TIME. THERE IS BEAUTY IN CLEANING#PAINT BRUSHES AND MEASURING CUPS IN HER KINDA BROKEN SINK AND MEOWING AT HER CAT AND THANKING HER FOR HELPING YOU CLEAN UP THE PAINTS SHE
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#also she pisses me off bc she constantly says she's such a good person and an angel and that she has a big heart and cares for everyone#while being the kind of person who literally denies genocide and believes an oppressed group of ppl would 'lie' about it#like ?????? i wouldnt wanna be friends w someone like that anyway bc that made me so appalled#how could u believe that ppl who have suffered greatly being murdered and erased... would LIE abt it???????#idk im trying to not care but it bothers me so much bc we share so many mutuals bd i have to see her stupid url constantly#and yeah sure girlie your heart is so big and u care sm nd you're such a nice person who hates cruelty!!!!#(but at the same time u have no empathy at all for ppl who are being GENOCIDED)#nd also some of her things aimed at me....#im the first to admit that im not perfect nd that i make mistakes nd im self aware nd i know when i fuck up#i know when i deliberately choose to be selfish nd put myself first nd hurt someone else's feelings w it#im aware of everything i do. i will never lie or not acknowledge it#it's her hypocrisy that bothers me. nd that she didnt talk to me abt it. she just discarded me#bcat first it was a misunderstanding. if she woul've talked to me like an adult we couldve sorted it out#nd i would've realized it immediately#but since she decided to hurt me nd throw me away i decided to be selfish nd the misunderstanding turned into a choice on my end#so no im not a nice perfect angel. but u arent either. stop pretending to be so fkn superior when u literally arent at all#im just saying this bc i miss her sm#nd i know she isnt thinking anything other than unpleasant thoughts of me. if she even thinks of me at all#but i still miss her sm
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#WE ARE SO BACK DUDE#MAN#this is like the first good night i've had in a while#goddamn it i fucking hate being an adult and it's something that's frustrated me in a way i don't know how to express for so fucking long#being able to admit that to myself and just say it out loud feels so fucking good. I do not want to do adult shit. i do not want to pretend#to be normal fuck everything and everybody i fucking hate being an adult i hate careers and social niceties fuck everything#god i fucking hate everything and im so happy to be able to say that again. life fucking sucks and thats it#oh my god ive been stuck in a positivity puddle for so long i hate it. complaining and hating is my lifee i will never stop#just oh my god it's so hard to be alive all the time and nobody ever talks about it and just expects you to do everything right all the tim#We are not going to fucking make it dude. what else is there. can we do something else#i feel so expected to just do things right all the time and i feel like people can see that and just make fun of me for existing all the ti#i fucking hate it! literally all of that shit makes me want to die. but like yeah like oh my god putting all of that down might fix me#we'll see. oh god the pokemon video looms large. im on gen 4 but i've been hardcore procrastinating on it. i'm just so done with all the sh#MAN i feel like a real person again i feel like i can breathe. i have been so frustrated w my friends and family for the longest time#and now i just feel like oh. yeah. literally none of this bullshit is necessary. why am i letting all these people tell me how to live#Who cares if im alone who cares if someones watching who cares if people like me i am alone i am happy i am doing what i want#like if i meet my goals and i feel like im doing what i think i should be doing then who cares. i'm having the experiences i want to have#and that's enough. it was always enough. and anybody who says it isn't should get over it. im fine. why are you trying to make me not fine#ok im done im done i just wnated to pour all this out. it feels a little cheesey but legitimately most nights to me feel like they dont mat#and this one is one that for the first time in a long felt like it finally did
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