#and with the scenes being so fast-paced now... I think it's time I find another show to watch

[longingpolaris]

the only characters I like in the gilded age are oscar, mr and mrs russell and, surprisingly, the clock boy

[cozycottagetarot]

PAC: Your First Kiss With Your Person

Notes:

This PAC Contains: 

General Info On The Kiss

Setting The Scene

The Kiss

Extended Edition Covers:

You During The Kiss

Your Person During The Kiss

The Aftermath

✨ This reading is for entertainment purposes only. ✨ (General Disclaimer at the bottom)

Reading Masterlist | Patreon | Paid Readings -- Open 🥂

PILE 1

General Things

Could be very early in the relationship… during the ‘get to know you’ stages. There’s a lot of attraction and tension between you and this person. I think this could be someone you either meet through a career or online. It’s fast paced but intense, a quick back and forth. But it’s good because it’s an exchange where you both are on the same level or matching energies. It’s welcomed, but it feels very interrogative, like ‘does this person fit the bill of what I’m looking for 👀’ rather than a chill get to know you. It feels like a new environment too, as in both of you are out doing something new together for the first time. It doesn’t seem like there’s any anxiety around the questioning, just kind of throwing every and anything at the wall to see if it sticks. Scorpio or Gemini could be important placements for you or them.

Setting The Scene

When it comes to the location of the kiss it could be a festival of some kind, I’m get a fair, specifically a renaissance fair for someone, or something with that vibe for a few of you. It could also be an event around water and/or where there will be live entertainment. I think it’s definitely picked strategically by whoever plans this outing… I think maybe more so your person. I also feel like it could be their old stomping grounds as well or something being hosted by someone they know. There’s an opportunity to kind of learn from others during this event/setting also.

The Kiss In General

I think this kiss is going to be awakening or energizing. One that gives you a surge of energy. I also heard that you might be trying to best them at something too. It might be outside of one your comfort zones and there could be a lot of anxiety surrounding the kiss on someone’s part. If not anxiety, hearts racing. During a dance as well could be another likely scenario. One where it’s like "Okay, we’re dancing... I feel like a fool, Oh! you’re kissing me!"... Except the rest of the thoughts just fizzle out because you melt into it. People around you might cheer you guys on.

If you'd like to see the extended version of this reading which covers you & your person's feelings during the kiss as well as the 'aftermath' you can check it out on my Patreon here. Regardless, thank you for reading and take care! 💕

PILE 2

General Things

The cards are giving me fairytale-esque vibes... a dream come true. This could happen when you’re traveling, finding home or experiencing something life changing. This could happen at a time where you’re on a journey to finding yourself/ finding your way and I’m getting that your person is intent on wanting to show you they can be a part of that world. I think this person is hard to ignore, and honestly it could be hard to ignore whatever is going on between you two. There could be something about their eyes… maybe you avoid eye contact because it’s so intense and feels like you’re intruding? I think your person lights up your world. However, they could kind of know themselves and have all their 'colours' while you’re now finding yours. There’s something intimidating here about them.... very much you trying to convince yourself you two can’t be together. I’m also hearing “You’re my North Star”.

It could happen during a place that represents transition, in the location you’re leaving or at one of your homes (most likely yours). It’s like they want to offer you home and you’re resisting. You’re denying yourself entrance into the castle they have to offer. I think your head and heart aren’t aligning and in all honesty your person is tired of it and just at a point where they are begging you to let yourself be happy.

Setting The Scene

I feel like this is a nice setting. More lavish for some than others . It could be in the evening or at night. It should be a date? I don’t think you want it to be but it is… I mean I think you know it is but you're at a point where you're beside yourself pushing this person away mentally and throwing up walls. You guys could go to a show or some kind of enchanting exhibit too.

The Kiss In General

This could definitely be at night. I think the setting really depends on your interest. So it could be a concert, something related to music… but somewhere someone has the chance to get rowdy. Even a wedding or something where it’s nice but someone can likely get plastered and no one would really be surprised.

Okay back to the general kiss. I feel like it's a battle in a way. It’s impulsive. Emotions are running high. It’s about potential and fighting for what’s 'right'... Trying to wake you up. A climatic battle of trying to get out of your head so you can see what’s in front of you and just not what you’re dreaming of... what you think the cards (?) are telling you. I think this may be if you're constantly consuming tarot or other forms of divination and living your life by it.

If you'd like to see the extended version of this reading which covers you & your person's feelings during the kiss as well as the 'aftermath' you can check it out on my Patreon here. Regardless, thank you for reading and take care! 💕

PILE 3

General Things

You could be a little bit disinterested or distracted when you have your first kiss with your person. I think it might take you a minute or two before it registers in your head that you too kissed. It could be a kiss to calm you… like you’re brain is going a mile a minute and generally not being grounded.

I think you’re going to be in a comfortable situation when your person kisses you/you two share your first kiss. It could be in a situation where you’re both working on something together. Or they are helping you with something you’re working on. It’s someone who complements you beautifully. It could be a social gathering between close friends as well (but it still feels like a rather private moment, like everyone else is distracted as well and they sneak a quick kiss). If you’re a musician (or a music teacher, really anything related to that field) you could be composing or reviewing a piece and they kiss you. You could get pulled in many different directions mentally or come up with a lot of ideas but burn out on them quickly.

Setting The Scene Oh my gosh-- Are you hungry or do you like food because all I can think of is food 😩

It could be a casino, family/friends game night, holiday dinner. You’re focused intensely on something in front of you. Your mind is calculating, unfazed by things going on around you. I’m also getting the caterpillar in Alice in Wonderland... a 'smoky' or and environment that gives off psychedelic vibes.

The Kiss In General

I think the kiss is attention grabbing, not just for you but someone around you may kind of cheer or whoop but you might not pay them much mind. I think your person is like this is my time with y/n and I’m not letting their thoughts steal them away! I think they're accustomed to you being off in la la land. For some of you, you could be in the medical field or have a very scholarly profession that bleeds into your personal time. But the kiss always cuts through that. I’m hearing “ah ah ah” as well.

If you'd like to see the extended version of this reading which covers you & your person's feelings during the kiss as well as the 'aftermath' you can check it out on my Patreon here. Regardless, thank you for reading and take care! 💕

Disclaimer: All readings and tarot/blog games are for fun and entertainment purposes only. It is in no way meant to act as or replace professional advice of any kind. You know yourself and what’s going on in your life best so I ask that you trust yourself above all else. Finally please take only what resonates from the reading which may be some of it, all of it, or none at all

[ponderingmoonlight]

Giyuu Tomioka stopping you from killing Nezuko with his own methods

Pairing: Giyuu x fem!reader

Word Count: 2,6k

Synopsis: When you were assigned to assist Shinobu and your former master and secret crush Giyuu, you never imagined to find him saving a demon. How is he supposed to stop you from fulfilling your duty, from hating him?

Warnings: hurt to comfort, Giyuu is...well, Giyuu. As always in my kny fics, I'm using some ai pics so if this doesn't sit right with you don't go any further, not 100% proofread, let me know what you think <3

“I will assist the young slayers in this area. Are you okay with aiding Tomioka?”

Your heart skips a beat by the sheer sound of his name. The man who trained you so well that you’d be a hashira if he wasn’t still stronger than you. The man with the ocean blue eyes, the calmest composure, who never talks much but always finds the right words.

Giyuu Tomioka, the men you fell hopelessly in love with a long time ago.

“I am”, you reply, concentrated on his smell that hangs in the air.

He ran down here just like you do now. Where is he? Is he alright? Hopefully no one was hurt.

“I thought so”, Shinobu replies with a kind smile.

It’s not a secret to any hashira anymore how you feel for the water pillar. Maybe it’s because you share the same breathing style, maybe it’s the fact that he knows how to tame down your pounding heart, to give you the calmness you need in these turbulent times.

“Take care of yourself, I’m sure you’ll do great!”

With that, the insect pillar disappears into the other direction of the forest, leaving you alone with your pounding heartbeat and the stinging smell of blood that hangs in the air. You grip the handle of your sword tighter, dash forward a little faster. You can do this. After all, Giyuu Tomioka was a great teacher.

He didn’t prepare you for the scene that lays itself out in front of your eyes, though. A demon lying on the floor along with a boy, just inches away. Him, bending over them. If it stretches out its hand, if it hits him with full force… Out of instinct, you pick up your pace, race towards him as fast as you can. You need to save him, need to kill that demon, you-

You can’t believe your eyes. The blade of your sword crushes into another one. Not the claws of a demon, not the katana of the boy lying on the floor.

It’s Giyuu’s sword.

You glide through the air elegantly, eyes meeting his ocean blue orbs that don’t show anything but calmness. Is he…protecting them?

“I’m begging you to spare them.”

You can’t believe your ears, the urgent tone in his voice so unusual that you can’t help but stop in your tracks. Is this really Giyuu? The man who taught you to kill every demon on your way? The man who never hesitates, who does his duty without thinking twice? Right now, he positioned himself between you and both of them, his sword ready to dodge your attack all over again.

“She’s a demon”, you clarify, eyes wandering to the girl who lays on the floor and eyes you sceptically.

No, this isn’t right. You can’t just stand here and do nothing. Without replying to his words, you dash forward again just the way he taught you.

Only to get greeted by his blade again.

He grabs your arm gently and pulls you closer with a swift motion of his trained body. You hold your breath, heart pounding out of your chest all over again. Giyuu being so close to you, Giyuu protecting a demon…

“What has gotten into you?”, you breathe out.

Oh, how lovely your haori sparkles in the down-going sun, how gorgeous your eyes gleam only inches away from his own face. Will he ever get enough from simply looking at you, from studying every inch of your colourful orbs? You really learned how to handle your sword well, the elegant movements of your body surpassing his own.

No. He shakes his head ever so slightly. This is not the right time to ponder about your gorgeous appearance. After all, you’re standing right in from of him, your eyes reflecting the distress he caused by protecting Kamado Tanjiro and his sister from your blade. Would you understand? After all these times he taught you not to spare a single demon, the countless nights he encouraged you to behead them. It is too much to ask you for mercy now?

“You need to spare them.”

Your world is turned upside down, orbs eyeing him up and down in sheer disbelief. This doesn’t sound like the man you know at all. Is this a cruel trick, the power of the demon, maybe? As if he’s able to read your thoughts, he lets his sword fall into the discoloured snow and cups your cheek gently.

“We both know I can’t.”

He allows his eyes to rest for a moment, to think about what he’ll do next really careful. One glimpse into your determined orbs shows that you won’t give in, that you are too skilled and smart to simply follow his pleas. No, he has to find another way, he-

“Can you move?”

His heart stings in agony just by thinking what he’s about to do next.

“Make yourself move even if you can’t move.”

But he has to. If there’s the slightest chance Tanjiro’s sister can be healed, he needs to path their way.

“Take your sister and run.”

Even if it means betraying you. You, his first tsugoko. You, the woman he loves in secret.

“Tomioka-san…Sorry for the trouble, thank you very much!”

You can’t believe your ears, widen eyes watching in horror as the boy grabs the demon’s hand and sprints away.

“Giyuu…”

Your whole body feels numb, mind desperately trying to process what just happened. Your master, the water pillar…A traitor?

“This…This is against the Corps rules…”, you mumble.

He grabs your other hand as well, forces your sword into the snow right next to his.

“It was never my attention to betray you, (y/n). But I can’t allow you to kill that demon. We need to give them a chance.”

“She’s a demon!”, you shout, arms fighting against the sheer force of his grip only to fall into the cold snow violently.

You can’t hold back the tears that start to sting in your eyes anymore. No, this isn’t only about the sheer fact that he spared a demon. It’s about the fact that he betrayed you, that he still doesn’t share the reason why he saved them.

“I thought you trust me. I thought you…care more about me.”

It kills him from the inside, the way you look up at him with all that grief in your eyes getting reflected in the moonlight. Giyuu can only imagine how you must feel, how it has to look in your gorgeous orbs.

“I care about you more than anything else, (y/n). But still, I can’t allow you to kill that demon. Not her.”

“Do you know her? Is that the reason why you don’t want to see her die?”

You hate the pity tone in your voice, the struck of jealousy that fires your anger all over again. You lift yourself off the ground and storm towards him, grabbing his haori tightly.

“I gave it all up for you. I worked hard to become the demon slayer you always imagined me to be, I did everything I could to stay by your side, I…I always longed for you to love me back, Giyuu Tomioka. Only for you to break your own rules, to lie into my face!”, you shout at him, shaking him violently before you are able to stop yourself.

“I thought you’d feel the same way but apparently, I’m nothing but a fool.”

 “But I do.”

Before you’re able to shake him again, he grabs your wrists firmly and pulls you closer, the heat radiating from your body becoming unbearable to ignore.

“You’re right, you don’t deserve that I’m lying to your face. I should have told you about them a long time ago, should have been honest with you. The truth is, I fail to understand myself why that demon didn’t kill the boy yet. Master Urukodaki…He himself told me that she is under control and does not pose a threat. If there is the slightest chance she’ll turn into a human again I need to protect them both. He is special, (y/n).”

Everything is too much. His sudden outburst, the fact that there’s still a demon out there, Shinobu who told you over and over to not spare a single one of them.

“I can’t”, you cry out.

As if in trance you grab your sword again, sprint down the soft snowy ground in the direction of the boy and the demon. What are you supposed to do? Kill them, spare them, talk to them? That girl is a demon, she needs to get killed. But all the sings Giyuu said, that look on his face. You can’t ignore what he sees in them, the words of none other than master Urukodaki haunting you down. Maybe he is right. But still, she’s a demon, you’re a demon slayer, it’s your destiny to-

You land on the ground softly.

“Please don’t run away from me.”

Suddenly it feels even harder to breathe, your lungs getting pressed into the ground without any mercy. Was it another demon, an attack from behind? Your eyes dart upwards, searching for hold in the dim moonlight.

Only to get greeted by Gyiuu Tomioka’s ocean blue eyes.

“Stay.”

“I…can’t”, you press out, arms fighting against his larger frame.

He lays on top of you, his arms pinning you down onto the ground while the sheer weight of his body keeps you in place. You might be strong, a skilled demon slayer.

But he’s still Giyuu Tomioka.

“You lied to me! You played with me! Shin…Shinobu-san is here too! When she finds out what you did, that you helped a demon…Don’t you know that you might die!?”

It becomes more than urgent to you. None of this is about the fact that he helped a demon, that you fail to understand why he feels sympathy for that poor boy. It’s about the risk of losing Giyuu, his potential end as a pillar and his whole life. No other hashira will understand why he acted the way he did. And if Kagaya-sama thinks the same…You swallow away the big lump that forms in your throat, blink away the tears that threaten to fall again.

You can’t afford to lose him.

Instead of answering, Giyuu just stares down at you, gets lost in the ocean of your eyes. Oh, he always pondered about the fact how well water breathing suits you. With your movements being flowy like waves and your eyes reflecting the ocean itself, it wouldn’t be hard for him to stare at you all day. You are magnificent, so kind that the world doesn’t deserve you, well-liked by everyone else. Why is it him you’re staring at, why do you even care about the fact that he might die? It shouldn’t bother you, shouldn’t hit you the way it does.

“I love you!”, you finally cry into the night.

The unspoken words between both of you, the stinging true always present but never talked about. You love him with all your heart, with all you have.

And the thought of losing him kills you from the inside.

Gyiuu can’t believe his ears, still staring at you without even flinching. You…love him? A gorgeous girl like you who turns heads on a regular basis, so skilled that you’re even able to outstand Kyojuro’s training. Why would you love a man like him who has nothing to offer? Even if it makes his usual calm heart flutter in sheer excitement, even if he wants nothing more than closing the gap between your faces and get a taste of your lips, he stays right in place.

“Don’t worry about me. I will not escape my punishment.”

You let out your shaky breath, mind not able to process his words while your heart already shatters into a million tiny pieces.

“BUT I CARE!”

You grab his haori tightly, knuckles standing out white while you stare up at his unwavering eyes.

“I care about you! I don’t want you to die because of something like this, I don’t want to lose you!”

He should let go of you, should stand up and walk away. You don’t deserve the pain he puts you through, you never did.

But instead, his hands cup your cheeks gently. Instead, he leans down, closer and closer to your gorgeous face.

Instead, he presses his lips against yours.

You forget how to exist for a second. Is this…is this really happening? Gyiuu Tomioka laying on top of you, his firm body pressed against yours. Giyuu Tomioka, kissing you oh so gently. You feel like fainting and flying at the same time, as good as never before while a wave of stomach flutter hits you with full force.

How many times did you imagine in secret how it must feel to have him so close? All these countless nights you pondered about the feeling of his lips, how it must be to hug him. And now all of this is happening all at once.

“Now, what do we have here? Aren’t both of you supposed to kill the demon who just run away?”

He lets go faster than you’re able to react, his hand stretched out in order to help you off the ground.

“Shinobu-san”, you breathe out in sheer horror.

Your hands start trembling, glossy eyes darting towards her. How long is she here? What did she hear? Your stomach drops to the ground. Please, she didn’t hear about the stinging fact that Giyuu helped that demon, she didn’t-“

“Is it true that you wanted to spare this demon, Tomioka?”

You swallow hard, vision getting blurry. As much as you adore Shinobu with all your heart, you know as good as she does that helping a demon is strictly against the Corps rules. And even though you weren’t strong enough to stop him, from reporting his resistance.

Shinobu will.

He doesn’t answer. Instead, he blankly stares at her, body positioning itself in front of her and you.

“(y/n), were you also involved into this? I thought you are a better demon slayer than that. You even have the chance to be a hashira! What a shame-“

“Stop”, Giyuu interrupts her.

“She tried to stop me multiple times.”

“Giyuu”, you mutter under your breath.

“Is that so? Well, isn’t the word of your crush enough to stop you? Aren’t you aware of what awaits you?”

You watch in horror as she storms towards him, her sword ready to hit him.

“So you’re really serious about saving a demon? So serious that you’re not only risking your life, but (y/n)’s as well?”

Their blades clash into each other over and over.

“Please stop, it’s not what you think!”, you desperately try to interrupt.

“I am not risking (y/n)’s life”, he clarifies.

“Oh, but you do? How are we supposed to know she didn’t help you? After all, everybody knows how close you are!”

You can’t escape the blush that creeps up your face immediately.

“T-that’s…n-not true!”

“And because (y/n) is important to me, I’d never put her life into danger.”

“I have a message from headquarters! Bring them back! Bring them back! Tanjiro, dressed in a checkered haori, with a scar on his forehead! Nezuko, a demon girl with a bamboo muzzle! Bring them back! Bring them back!”

Without another word, Shinobu puts her sword in her sheath and starts walking away. Oh, this is bad. Absolutely bad. Getting sent to the headquarters means only one thing…

“Don’t worry too much.”

Giyuu grabs your hand firmly, his eyes captivate you in an instant.

“I won’t allow anyone to hurt you.”

Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix  @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld @froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso  @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @kayleegomez @ryva @baku2345 @komelrebi-san

[physalian]

“How do I know if my story needs work or if I’m just being hard on myself?”

As I sit here accepting the fact that at 70k words into Eternal Night’s sequel while waiting for my editor for Eternal Night itself, that I have made an error in my plot.

Disclaimer: This is not universal and the writing experience is incredibly diverse. Figuring this out also takes some time and building up your self-confidence as an author so you can learn to separate “this is awful (when it’s not)” and “this is ok (but it can be better)” and “this isn’t working (but it is salvageable).”

—

When I wrote my first novel (unpublished, sadly), years ago, I would receive feedback all over the chapters and physically have to open other windows to block off parts of the screen on my laptop to slow-drip the feedback because I couldn’t handle constructive criticism all at once. I had my betas color-code their commentary so I could see before I read any of it that it wasn’t all negative. It took me thrice as long as it does today to get through a beta’s feedback because I got so nervous and anxious about what they would say.

The main thing I learned was this: They’re usually right, when it’s not just being mean (and even then, it’s rarely flat out mean), and that whatever criticisms they have of my characters and plot choices is not criticism of myself.

It did take time.

But now I can get feedback from betas and even when I hear “I’d DNF this shit right now unless you delete this,” I take a step back, examine if this one little detail is really that important, and fix it. No emotional turmoil and panic attack needed. I can also hear “I didn’t like it” without heartbreak. Can’t please everyone.

The only time I freak out is when I'm told "this won't need massive edits" followed up by, in the manuscript, "I'd DNF this shit right now". Which happened. And did not, in fact, require a massive rewrite to fix.

So.

What might be some issues with your story and why it “isn’t working”.

1. Your protagonist is not active enough in the story

You’ve picked your protagonist, but it’s every other character that has more to do, more to say, more choices to make, and they’re just along for the ride, yet you are now anchored to this character’s story because they’re the protagonist. You can either swap focus characters, or rework your story to give them more agency. Figure out why this character, above any other, is your hero.

2. Your pacing is too slow

Even if you have a “lazy river” style story where the vibes and marinating in the world is more important than a breakneck plot, slow pacing isn’t just “how fast the story moves” it’s “how clearly is the story told,” meaning if you divert the story to a side quest, or spend too long on something that sure is fluffy or romantic or funny, but it adds nothing to the characters because it’s redundant, doesn’t advance the plot, doesn’t give us more about the world that actually matters to the themes, then you may have lost focus of the story and should consider deleting it, or editing important elements into the scenes so they can pull double-duty and serve a more active purpose.

3. You’ve lost the main argument of your narrative

Sometimes even the best of outlines and the clearest plans derail. Characters don’t cooperate and while we see where it goes, we end up getting hung up on how this one really cool scene or argument or one-liner just has to be in the story, without realizing that doing so sacrifices what you set out to accomplish. Personally I think sticking to your outline with biblical determination doesn’t allow for new ideas during the writing process, but if you find yourself down the line of “how did we get here, this isn’t what I wanted” you can always save the scenes in another document to reuse later, in this WIP or another in the future.

4. You’re spending too long on one element

Even if the thing started out really cool, whether it’s a rich fantasy pit stop for your characters or a conversation two characters must have, sometimes scenes and ideas extend long past their prime. You might have characters stuck in one location for 2 or 3 chapters longer than necessary trying to make it perfect or stuff in all these details or make it overcomplicated, when the rest of the story sits impatiently on the sidelines for them to move on. Figure out the most important reasons for this element to exist, take a step back, and whittle away until the fat is cut.

5. You’ve given a side character too much screentime

New characters are fun and exciting! But they can take over the story when they’re not meant to, robbing agency from your core characters to leave them sitting with nothing to do while the new guy handles everything. You might end up having to drag your core characters along behind them, tossing them lines of dialogue and side tasks to do because you ran out of plot to delegate with one character hogging it all (which is the issue I ran into with the above mentioned WIP). Not talking about a new villain or a new love interest, I mean a supporting character who is supposed to support the main characters.

—

As for figuring out the difference between “this is awful and I’m a bad writer” and “this element isn’t working” try pretending the book was written by somebody else and you’re giving them constructive criticism.

If you can come up with a reason for why it’s not working that doesn’t insult the writer, it’s probably the latter. As in, “This element isn’t working… because it’s gone on too long and the conversation has become cyclical and tiring.” Not “this element isn’t working because it’s bad.”

Why is it bad?

“This conversation is awkward because…. There’s not enough movement between characters and the dialogue is really stiff.”

“This fight scene is bad because….I don’t have enough dynamic action, enough juicy verbs, or full use of the stage I’ve set.”

“This romantic scene is bad because…. It’s taking place at the wrong time in the story. I want to keep it, but this character isn’t ready for it yet, and the vibe is all wrong now because they’re out-of-character.”

“This argument is bad because…. It didn’t have proper build-up and the sudden shouting match is not reflective of their characters. They’re too angry, and it got out of hand quickly. Or I’m not conveying the root of their aggression.”

—

There aren’t very many bad ideas, just bad execution. “Only rational people can think they’re crazy. Crazy people think they’re sane,” applies to writing, too.

I just read a fanfic recently where, for every fight scene, I could tell action was not the writer’s strong suit. They leaned really heavily on a crutch of specific injuries for their characters, the same unusual spot getting hit over and over again, and fights that dragged on for too long being unintentionally stagnant. The rest of the fic was great, though, and while the fights weren’t the best, I understood that the author was trying, and I kept reading for the good stuff. One day they will be better.

In my experience beta reading, it’s the cocky authors who send me an unedited manuscript and tell me to be kind (because they can’t take criticism), that they know it’s perfect they just want an outside opinion (they don’t want the truth, they want what will make them feel good), that they know it’s going to make them a lot of money and everyone will love it (they haven’t dedicated proper time and effort into researching marketing, target audiences, or current trends)—these are the truly bad authors. Not just bad at writing, but bad at taking feedback, are bullies when you point out flaws in their story, and cheap, too.

The best story I have received to date was where the author didn’t preempt with a self-deprecating deluge of “it’s probably terrible you know but here it is anyway” or “this is perfect and I’m super confident you’re going to love it”.

It was something like, “This is my first book and I know it has flaws and I’m nervous but I had a lot of fun doing it”.

And yeah, it needed work, but the bones of something great were there. So give yourself some credit, yeah?

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | December 19th-24th 2023

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you're all having a good time with your loved ones. You might get an extra rec this week as a treat! 😊

Complete

running in the dark (let the storms arise) by extasiswings/ @extasiswings (6x10: In A Flash | 2K | Teen): As Buck sleeps, Eddie dreams.

give it to someone special by rainbow_nerds/ @rainbow-nerdss (Canon Divergent - Different First Meeting, Christmas | 12K | Mature): Buck and Eddie meet at the airport after their respective girlfriends live their Hallmark movie dreams and dump them right before Christmas.

I Couldn’t Stand the Person Inside Me I Turned All the Mirrors Around by Princessfbi/ @princessfbi (Hurt Buck, Established Buddie | 7K | General): The shattering sound of plates erupted in the air like a crack of thunder and Eddie’s gaze shot up from his phone. Something was wrong. It was a hair thin trigger that had been switched the moment he caught sight of his boyfriend and the whole world could’ve stopped for all Eddie knew. Buck was staring down at his hands, breathing way too fast, and drowning in some kind of panic that only he could see. “My hands won’t work,” Buck said so quietly.

🔥 Kink Club AU series by Princessfbi/ @princessfbi (Canon Divergent - Different First Meeting, BDSM, Dom Eddie, Sub Buck | Complete | Explicit): Canon compliant one shots where Eddie works at a Kink Club as a side hustle and meets Buck there before his first shift in 2x01.

The Warmth (of You) (25K): aka where Buck and Eddie first meet at a kink club before the firehouse To Weather the Storm (With You) (21K): aka the fallout of Buck finding out the dom he met at a Kink Club is his new coworker Safe Here (With You) (20K): aka Buck and Eddie handle working a shift after their first scene The Building Pressure (of You) (15K): aka Buck reaches out to Eddie after he leaves Abby's place in 2x07 An Offer to Torment (You) (14K): aka Eddie is all twisted up inside about what to do with Shannon. Buck offers himself up for some much needed holiday stress relief.

🔥 to be found by ZainClaw/ @zainclaw (Werewolf AU | 71K | Mature): After being mistreated by his alpha for the last time, Buck abandons his pack and heads for the city where he’s found by Eddie - another werewolf who’s nothing like the ones Buck is used to. Eddie is gentle, kind, and has made a pack for himself and his son that Buck desperately wishes he could be a part of. (Part 1 of to be found (verse))

🔥 to belong by ZainClaw/ @zainclaw (Werewolf AU | 9K | Explicit): Reluctantly, Buck detaches himself from Eddie’s neck and lifts his head just enough for them to look at each other. Eddie’s eyes are dark even with the room bathing in sunlight, his pupils blown. His chest rises and falls at a quick pace, his cheeks flushed. Buck can’t help but lick his own mouth at the sight of Eddie’s kiss-bruised lips. I did that, he thinks. A few months ago he hadn’t even known how to kiss Eddie properly for the first time, and now he can do this. Can leave Eddie looking completely disheveled with just his mouth and hands, the sound of his fast thumping heart loud in Buck’s ears. It makes his chest swell with pride. (Part 2 of to be found (verse))

Christmas Lights by ZainClaw/ @zainclaw (Established Buddie, Christmas | 1K | Teen): “What are we looking at?” Eddie asks, his voice slightly muffled from where his cheek is resting against the top of Buck’s head. “The lights.” “Okay,” Eddie hums. “And what do we think about the lights?”

don't waste a dime on me by QuietLittleVoices/ @hawkeyefrommash (Established Buddie, Secret Relationship | 2K | Teen): Buck and Eddie attend the LAFD's Winter Charity Gala, where Buck is up for auction as a 'date with a real firefighter!'.

Pining. Get it? Like the Tree? by littlechivalry/ @jonlybonlyfromboldlygo (Christmas, First Kiss | 2K | General): Buck likes Christmas. Well, he likes the idea of Christmas.  Loved ones getting together. Generosity. The magic of the season. It's wonderful. The reality however, or at least the reality he's experienced? Not so much.

all I want for christmas by smilingbuckley/ @smilingbuckley (Christmas, Getting Together | 7K | Teen): Eddie has to work Christmas Eve and asks Buck to take him to the Buckley-Han Christmas dinner. Buck is happy to spend Christmas with Christopher, but being with his parents dampens the mood. It makes it worse when his mother questions his place in Christopher’s life. Luckily, Christopher knows Buck enough to see him hurting and has a plan to make him feel better. To show him who his real family are.

baby, you never look��d better than you do in that ugly Christmas sweatеr by wikiangela/ @wikiangela (Christmas, Getting Together | 7K | General): Buck mentions he always wanted his family to wear matching Christmas sweaters, but never got it - Eddie takes matters into his own hands.

Like The Cavemen Did by DeadlyChildArtemis (PWP, BDSM | 4K | Explicit): Buck and Eddie discover a new part of themselves.

🔥 still sitting in a corner i haunt by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Time Travel | 7K | Mature): Unable to imagine a scenario where acting on his feelings for Buck doesn’t end up with everybody hurt, Eddie rejects Buck. Before he can finish the conversation, Eddie is ripped from his time and hurtled into several, seemingly random moments from the future that help clarify his decision.

How Eddie Learned To Stop Worrying and Embrace the Kitten Life by DeadlyChildArtemis (PWP, BDSM | 7K | Explicit): Or, 5 times Eddie refuses to acknowledge his cat behavior and one time he does

All it took was one sniff by kas_delafere/ @janekburza (Incubus Buck, Werewolf Eddie | 1K | General): Buck’s been starving himself since Abby left. But the new hire in the station apparently took one look (one sniff, really) at him and decided Buck is The One.

and i feel just like i want to kiss you underneath my mistletoe by oklahoma/ @malewifediaz (Christmas | 9K | Teen): 5 times the team tries to get Eddie and Buck to kiss under the mistletoe and the 1 time they do. Kinda.

ain’t a drop of bad blood by grandpacat (Post-Lawsuit | 2K | General): Buck cries, Eddie apologizes, Eddie cries, Buck apologizes. Post-lawsuit canon divergence.

Hearth by grandpacat (Post-S6 | 6K | Mature): In which Marisol finds out about Eddie's will and isn't happy, Eddie has some realizations, and all the important conversations happen in the kitchen.

Brain Machine Broke by grandpacat (Getting Together, Post-S6 | 1K | General): Buck sees Eddie holding Jee-Yun and his brain breaks.

You and Me Here (underneath the mistletoe) by Bob_loblaws_lawblog/ @buddierights (Christmas, Getting Together | 6K | Teen): It’s fine. It’s just a kiss under the mistletoe. It’s a Christmas tradition, and in this case, just a joke. Not a big deal. He can play along – his only other choice is being weird about it, which sounds too much like revealing his feelings. So, he swallows it down and looks at Eddie who is still standing frozen, staring up at the mistletoe hanging above them. Buck forces an easy smile. “C’mon, I’m not that bad,” he jokes. The tension in Eddie’s shoulders lessens a little and he laughs softly. “No. No you’re not,” he admits. “So, what do we do?” Buck shrugs, trying to remain casual. “I guess we just suck it up and French a little.”

Bottled Poetry by Bob_loblaws_lawblog/ @buddierights (Fake Relationship, Valentine's Day | 7K | Teen): Buck and Eddie take a platonic trip to a winery and everyone assumes they're a couple. Eddie pines.

Home is Just Another Word for You by Bob_loblaws_lawblog/ @buddierights (Christmas, Different First Meeting AU | 10K | General): Eddie misses his flight home to his son on Christmas Eve, and just so happens to get stuck with the handsome man who sprinted across the airport with him.

Dance the Night Away by ReformedTsundere/ @film-in-my-soul (Canon Divergent - Different First Meeting | 7K | Mature): "Just promise me something, okay?" Eddie is brought around to the present, blinking as he wraps his hand around his beer bottle and nods for Ricky to go on, even though he's already half-sure of what's about to happen. "You have to rescue that poor boy over there." Ricky nods over Eddie's left shoulder, and Eddie, even though he knows better, finds himself twisting, hip cocked against the low bar, to follow Ricky's line of sight toward the cluster of round tables in the corner of the room.

Please Don't Wake Me Up by ReformedTsundere/ @film-in-my-soul (Incubus Eddie | 11K | Explicit): "You've been having wet dreams about me." And shit. Fucking fuck. That was not what Eddie had wanted to start with. But the words are out in the open, and Buck is gaping at him, jaw damn near on the floor as he's frozen, blinking quickly and processing what Eddie's just said. "You- how- did Chimney tell you?"

Cat Scratch Fever by ReformedTsundere/ @film-in-my-soul (Cat Hybrid Buck, PWP, Established Buddie | 3K | Explicit): When another cat hybrid on a call accidentally gets Buck hyped on pheromones, Eddie's there to take care of him.

When the Lost are Found by ReformedTsundere/ @film-in-my-soul (Soulmates AU | 3K | General): When everyone seems to have a better soulmate identifying system, Buck can't help but consider his own to be lackluster. How's he meant to find his soulmate with loose change and mismatched socks after all?

Capture Something by ReformedTsundere/ @film-in-my-soul (Percy Jackson Fusion | 3K | Teen): "Let's see," Buck counts off on his fingers, "he just broke up with his girlfriend. He lives in Texas while I'm in Pennsylvania. We have no evidence he's even interested in boys, and, oh yeah!" Buck fake gasps as though this last point has just come to him, "he's an Ares kid."

WIP

They don’t know (your name is already mine) by thewolvesof1998/ @thewolvesof1998 (Post-S6, Secret Relationship, Hurt Buck | 3/4 | 7K | General): Buck gets in a car accident on Christmas Eve Eve and the only ID he has on him is Eddie's dog tags. A case of mistaken Identity, a trip to the hospital and a Christmas Surprise.

Packing Light by devirnis/ @devirnis(Last Holiday AU, Christmas | 1/4 | 8K | Teen): The discovery that he has a terminal illness prompts Buck, who has been stagnating as a sales associate at Kelly’s Department Store, to withdraw his life savings and jet off to Europe. There, he lives like a millionaire at the luxury hotel where his sister works. The only one missing from his new life is his coworker and longtime crush, Eddie Diaz.

Kiss Me Once Cause You Know I Had A Long Night by I_still_dont_understand_13 / @sherlockcrossing (Prompt collection | 19/? | 13K | Teen): 100 kiss prompts.

a foundation of trust and love we cannot see by lemonzestywrites/ @lemonzestywrites (FWB, BDSM, Sub Eddie, Dom Buck | 1/17 | 12K | Explicit): “It’s like I want to explore it and dive into it, but it’s not exactly like I’m seeing someone to try this all out with,” he explains, doing his best to keep down the annoyed huff that threatens to escape him at every other word. Buck nods to himself before steadily going silent. For a minute, Eddie thinks that this is the end of their conversation. “I can show you if you’d like.” Eddie nearly chokes on his beer.

🔥 Right Where You Left Me by hyacinthusbloom/ @thebloomingheather (Canon Divergent, Post-S4, Angst | 89K | 20/? | Explicit | Warning: Rape/Non-con): "Therapy?" Eddie suggests. Buck almost laughs, but instead says, "I'll go if you go." Because he had fully expected him to be chicken shit, to disagree, and instead Eddie, the bastard, replies, "Deal." Or Buck never tells anyone that he slept with his therapist and deals with the butterfly effect years later.

🔥 Precious & Fragile Things by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Small Miracles AU, Angel Buck | 15K | 6/? | Teen): Buck is the Fallen Angel of Petty Temptation, who has been tasked with tempting human Eddie Diaz to sin and enjoy life, but just a little. He thinks the job will be easy - get in, get out, go back to Peru to continue messing around with eternity. But when Buck arrives in Los Angeles, he finds Eddie is harder to tempt than expected, and more compelling than Buck had hoped.

Fractals from the Lightning Bolt by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (One Shots Collection | 41/54 | 78K | Not Rated): A collection of oneshots, some originally posted on tumblr. Each chapter is individually rated.

42. Head Empty Just Vibes : Rated G - just more of me being obsessed with the possibilities of Eddie's recovery and Buck being there for him. 43. Phantom Sensation : Rated T - just to be on the safe side for blood and trauma and such. Yet another post-shooting "Buck stays over and helps Eddie recover" ficlet.

[formulaorange]

Winter 2024 Anime Review

Solo Leveling - 24 Episodes

This has been and will be my most anticipated series. We've only scratched the surface of the story and people are going nuts. I've been reading the light novel translations for a while now and I'm not even a little ready for when certain things are animated.

Easily one of the best anime adaptations out there. More to look forward to.

Sidenote - A1 is killing the animations considering it's one of their bigger ones in a while.

Also - they did a really solid job with the sound design, a lot of the timing made certain scenes feel just that much more intense.

9/10 - Amazing

Frieren - 28 episodes

Such a unique watching experience.

I think so many shows these days are fast paced, and action oriented, especially within the fantasy genre. This is such a relaxing and enjoyable watch.

The story is moving and the animations are warm and fuzzy.

Not much I'd change about the series.

10/10 - Masterpiece

The Apothecary Diaries - 24 Episodes

The second half of this series kept up with the flow of the first half really well. I feel like that shouldn't be a feat but it really is these days.

I genuinely love watching the subtleties of the romance in this series and the medical mystery cases are just as fun to watch.

The story has so many little bits and pieces working throughout the show and the last episode had me wrecked for reasons I never saw coming.

Just overall a big fan of this series.

9/10 - Amazing

Delicious in Dungeon - 12/24 Episodes

This series has no right to be this much fun.

The animations match the energy of the show so well and I think it's one of the best "entertainment" series of the season.

I was worried it would start to repeat itself but found that the characters become the highlight of the series and I looked forward to every episode.

(This is the series this season that I'm high-key obsessed with.)

8.5/10 - Very Good+

Shangri-La Frontier - 25 Episodes

One of the most fun looking MMORPG animes I've seen. I remember reading the teaser manga a while ago and was stoked to see it animated. Just a genuinely well done gamer oriented series.

They do such a good job at showing exactly the kinds of small things gamers pay attention to and some of the combat learning is stellar.

Not to mention the sound track honestly did not need to go as hard as it did?!

Really hoping they continue on with this for another season.

8/10 - Very Good

Bucchigiri?! - 12 Episodes (Updated)

I haven't seen any coverage for this show for some reason. It's a one shot that Mappa animated. The story felt quite slow but I personally had fun with it, the character design was satisfying - gives a bit of Jojo's and SK8 vibes. After a few weeks I couldn't stop thinking about it and went back - it ends up being a decently satisfying story. It's rare to see single season shows and I think that was really refreshing.

(Opening and ending are both bangers)

7.5/10 - Good+

Mashle - Season 2 - 12 Episodes

I decided to watch this once all the episodes had aired. I found that it's not one you can be in the mood to watch all the time, but when you are it's just as hilarious as the first season.

I've enjoyed the pacing of the story and I'm looking forward to future seasons.

7.5/10 - Good+

Unwanted Undead - 12 Episodes

Another series I read the manga for when it premiered. There's something about this series that gets me hooked. While the animations aren't anything of note, I find the story is oddly unique and I ended up bingeing all the episodes in one go. Definitely one I'm curious to see where it goes.

7/10 - Good

Mr. Villain's Day Off - 12 Episodes

This is purely for my own personal interest in attractive moody villains with alter ego's. It's a lot of fun to watch and it's just so wholesome.

That's it.

7/10 - Good

[alteredpupil]

PICK A CARD - WHAT’S HIDDEN FROM YOU AT THE MOMENT?

PILE ONE

Funny story pile 1, I ended up sending these pictures to the wrong person and they were asking me about the girls holding the guns, sounded concerned, the photo also glitched into two photos as I was starting to type this so take that as symbol. We are in mercury retrograde so make sure you don’t do something like sending somebody the wrong thing yourself or vice versa. What’s being hidden? (Self esteem by iamboe40e playing) & since this pile had most mercurical related interference it’s fair to assume you guys are the ones dealing with past circumstances coming back around the most. I’m also getting that somebody’s missing you sexually. This is also people from the past thinking about you. I’m seeing you guys are more in your dark feminine energy, burning everything in your way I’m hearing. Either you or another other party is crying over spilled milk… you might have a lot of people around try to drag you into the past pile 1. I see you been more isolated but focused on your future. Finding inner fulfillment I’m hearing. There is a new financial or material opportunity coming forwards you, something new. This could be you taking this initiative but you will have a partner (I’m hearing masculine) that could be helping you along in this project. People around you might be more intimidated by you at this time than usual. Your energy is intense but focused (we also got the Lilith card). For some of you there is a pregnancy scare or this could you be birthing a complete new project. I’m hearing this is the perfect time to plant that side. This pile is very self focused so I seen behind the scenes a lot of people are wondering about you & what you been up to. If you recently took on a artistic or athletic project I’m seeing people wondering about your progress. Behind the scenes people might think some of you are dealing with some shady business or there’s this air of mystery around you. Be careful who you tell your secrets to because I’m getting people can’t wait to spill it… you have somebody around you in secret competition with you. This could be over a partner or a creative project so watch your back and I’m hearing “keep up that demeanour”. Your attitude right now might be protecting you from the wrong people lurking waiting for you to drop your guard. What’s hidden is there’s a gift coming for you from somebody this month, could be money. Others of you this is your birthday month. For that project we were talking about earlier this can include singing, acting, or a new invention, this could even be you taking off on social media for what you do. Don’t let people from the past come in once they see how successful you are & reap off your hard work.

PILE TWO

What I’m getting is a message a lot of people might not admit to you, they find you unpredictable as fuck pile two. People never know what to expect with you and this might make some people take on a chameleon affect I heard to “keep up” or blend in with you. Almost like they can be on your same fast pace, wit, and charm. What’s hidden is the way other people see your potential, you might’ve gone through hell and back and handled it gracefully, like nothing even happened. Just like pile 1, there’s a intimidation factor here. I’m also getting some people miss you pile two, some are too scared to reach out & others may be busy. A lot of you reading this live in a fast paced area like a city or just lead a “fast” lifestyle, others might admire this about you or try to imitate it. People view you as different, you could be the black sheep of the family. There could be a friend group or family members talking behind your back. I don’t know why I’m getting the energy of people wanna tame you or “keep you in your place”. I just got the confirmation of protection, be careful what energy you allow in your space at this time, I literally heard “infiltrate”. Around the spring time a project you work on will be taking off and bringing in a lot of prosperity for you, you could be in your masculine energy doing this or will be doing this with a divine masculine that’s coming in the spring time. Again similar energies to pile 1. Also the cards keep going crazy so I feel like you have a lot of eyes or ears or mouths on you behind the scenes or you’re taking on multiple things at once. Last thing is whoever is pretending to be for you or “overtly” rooting for you is probably preying on your downfall. This could be a partner or friend or family but they can’t do nothing about it, just don’t share too much of your plans.

PILE THREE

You have a lot of admirers! You might have a lot of romantic interests that don’t also come forward. The energy is wanna be with you, wanna be like you, or wanna befriend you. Some people just want what you can offer or use you for material so be careful pile 3. What’s hidden is a lot of people think you’re wealthy wether you are or not. This could be the impression you give off, maybe you’re always well groomed. Lots of people wanna be in your inner circle or if they see you posting about activities they wish they were there with you. People are enamoured by you, it’s almost like watching you is like watching a movie. You give people the feeling that anything is possible. This is not a how they view you reading either but a lot of people admire how adventurous you are. What’s hidden is another side of you that you’ll discover this year. This pile will be completely renovated by the end of the year, physically and mentally I’m hearing. Some of you will discover a new job & meet new people. I’m getting a lot of things for this pile are meant to stay hidden, I’m liking most these surprises though. If somebody backstabs you anytime in the near future, just know it was destined and will be the start of you changing your life… changing your life in a way that will affect you 10 years down the line type of change.

PILE FOUR

I had to take out my cards again for this pile, I got a confirmation of something… either somebody is doing tarot readings on you or putting some kind of magic on you, intentionally or not. Please up your protection at this time… I’m getting you’re very powerful and might not even be aware of your own power. You’re being advised to take your craft more seriously even if it’s as simple as kitchen magic or protection and cleansing spells. What’s hidden is you have somebody coming back from the past about unfinished business. This person wants to make things right with you and while I can’t tell if their intentions are 100% pure I do see them as seeing you as somebody peaceful and in their own world, almost like they were the problem. I got confirmation you will get justice in this situation or any other situation that caused you turmoil, wether this is in real court or just simply somebody receiving their karma for messing with you or trying to take you off your destiny I’m hearing. Another thing is your suitors think you have a very sensual aura, you come off whimsical. People think they can’t grasp you, they’re scared they’ll have you and then the next day you’re gone like the wind. I’m also getting you have somebody that’s going to step up… possibly a air sign man/women. This person might wanna make you a offer but their energy is immature or this is somebody just getting started off in their career. This feels very impulsive, it’s up to you if you go for it or not. You also got news coming in you’re not expecting, this will be a opportunity that’s once in a lifetime and hard to turn down. “Visions come true” I heard.

[nekomacheercaptain]

Zeke always brings a new and fun experience to the bedroom, now this time suggesting another type of DP… along with Reiner, they make sure you’re both well prepared and taken care of!

Pairing: Reiner Braun x fem! reader x Zeke Yeager

Rating: explicit mature content (18+), NSFW

Word count: 2,6K

Content warnings: fem! reader, sub! reader, threesome (mfm), fingering, DP (double penetration), vaginal sex, anal sex, slight daddy kink, praise kink, pet names (baby, sweetheart, good girl, pretty girl, angel), creampie

How did it start? How had Zeke become a natural part of your bedroom activities? How had he managed to make himself almost a permanent part of your sex life? At some point, he just decided that you had let him into your relationship… just without the relationship stuff. However, he always knew how to set the mood, bringing candles to create a more passionate scene, so the questions swimming in your mind didn’t really weigh much. Especially with the energy he brought into the bedroom.

Oh, you don’t like it when I fuck you? I can always stop

He wore a wicked smile when you desperately rejected his words and begged him to continue. It was rare for him to have you on your back, as he much preferred your ass presented right in front of him, allowing him to force Reiner’s cock down your throat with his own thrusts. Coincidentally, that was the one thing Zeke wasn’t allowed to use, as Reiner expressed concern about Zeke’s roughness and how he didn’t want your throat ruined. But 2 out of 3? Zeke didn’t mind, not one bit. Not when he made sure your throat would be bruised anyway.

Between Reiner softly holding your head in place and Zeke making sure his handprints would be visible for days, you could barely think. All you could do was let out muffled sounds and gag because of Reiner’s girth stuffed down your throat. However, you could also open your eyes to meet his intense gaze, his golden eyes fogged with pleasure. Praises fell from his lips while his thumb softly caressed your cheek, telling you how good you were for them, and how good you felt.

Meanwhile Zeke found it adorable how you would struggle to breathe when his thumb pressed against your other hole, slick with spit before circling softly. His thrusts would slow down, making sure to rub his cock against your walls sucking him in further.

Greedy little thing, she just can’t get enough

Noticing your struggle, Reiner pulled himself out of your mouth carefully, holding up your head as you grew too weak to do it yourself when Zeke’s thumb penetrated your tense muscle, wanting to stretch you out. Taking them both was a new idea introduced by Zeke, and though it required some preparation, the thought of having them both inside you, instead of being stuffed in each end, excited you. And Zeke noticed how you pressed back against him, even if it was just an instinctual reach for more pleasure. Zeke groaned, an amused chuckle teasing your ears before his freehand slapped your ass harshly.

Dirty girl, getting impatient, hm?

Reiner’s soft words sometimes got lost in Zeke’s filthy ramblings, depending on the pacing he had set. Slow and deep meant Reiner’s voice was the only one you heard, while fast and rough meant Zeke’s voice was right in your ear, forcing you through your highs. Where Reiner always traced your skin like he was scared to alter it, Zeke had realized this as his goal. He liked littering your body with reminders of him, even more so just to find them the next time he barged into your quarters. Just like he had done to introduce something that could elevate your fun. How he managed to get a hold on actual lubrication, you didn’t even want to know. Zeke was a man of many mysteries, and you had learned some things were best to be kept in the dark about.

Slowing down his thrusts completely, Zeke reached for the tube before squeezing the clear and cold jelly on your rim, laughing almost wickedly when he heard you gasp and complain about the temperature of the liquid.

“Ssh-sh, it’ll get warm soon enough, stop whining,” he teased you while pulling out his thumb. He admired your arch, his hungry eyes taking in how sensitive you were. He placed two fingers to massage your hole, before slowly entering one of them inside you, making sure it was slick enough. Reiner cupped your face and bent down to envelope your lips in a sloppy, passionate kiss, swallowing your moans as Zeke toyed with your holes.

He enjoyed how your moans and whimpers came out all muffled against Reiner’s lips, seeing your struggle to contain the pleasure overwhelming you. And Zeke being Zeke, he enjoyed being an instigator, so his intrusion became deeper and he pushed another finger inside you, stretching your hole, making your mouth open wide to gasp and let out all the noises you could in pure desperation for air. Reiner smiled down at you, still cupping your face, his thumb softly stroking your cheek.

“My good girl, is it too much for you?”. Reiner always made sure you were comfortable enough to express your concerns or wants.

With a shake of your head, Reiner smiled before giving you a small peck, leaving your lips seeking for more as he stood up just to sit beside you in the bed, his calloused hand caressing the folds of your arch, loving how soft your flesh was. He didn’t mind enjoying the view and the feel of your skin beneath his palm while Zeke fucked you. Not when your sweet noises blessed his ears anyway. Besides, he knew he could never be replaced; your relationship is secure, the both of you finding it fun whenever Zeke joined you, the war chief introducing ideas you could never have imagined on your own. Zeke brought a company of expertise, one that led to the new experiences going well and creating a space for more experimentation. 

—

Reiner’s fingers soothed over the flesh of your waist as he carefully pushed you down on his cock, your knees on either side of his hips as he sat on the edge of the bed, with Zeke waiting patiently behind you.

“Good girl, always taking me so well,” Reiner praised you, remembering how you used to struggle accommodating his size when you first started being intimate. Oh how far you had come.

Your hands clung to his biceps as he filled you, broken moans falling from your lips, eyes glazed as you looked at your boyfriend. When you were sat on his lap completely, he kissed your neck as you threw your head back in a silent moan, allowing yourself time to adjust before letting them continue. Zeke took a small hold beneath your chin as he looked at you from above, before closing his eyes to place a small kiss on your forehead.

A small smile curled your lips, and you moved your hips softly, eliciting a groan from Reiner and a loud moan from yourself before your head fell down.

“Ah fuck!” your moan almost sounded like a laugh, almost lost in pleasure already.

Zeke chuckled behind you, one of his hands pressing against your back to push you closer to Reiner, while the other smeared lube around your hole before slick sounds could be heard as he pumped himself with it as well.

“Ready, baby?” Zeke whispered just behind your ear, his beard tickling your neck, as he pressed his tip against your entrance.

You gasped and nodded, “Yes, please, I’m ready! Please…”.

Zeke clicked his tongue, “Always so forgetful, isn’t she?”.

Reiner smiled softly against your neck and his tongue licked at your skin, his fingers digging further into your flesh until it pooled between his digits. Zeke pushed your head back again with his palm beneath your chin, making sure you were looking up at him.

“You’re ready, what?” the blue in his eyes reminded of the dangers of the ocean, always sure to put you in your place.

You sighed at the sudden excitement rushing through you, enjoying his domination, “I’m ready, daddy”.

He smirked before pressing his lips to yours in a rough kiss and pushed the tip of his cock past your tense muscle, relishing your shaky breaths and whimpers. Your nails dug into Reiner’s muscles and he hissed in response, his breath hot against your skin.

“Oh god, fuck - ngh- fuck-” your words came out as small cries against Zeke’s lips, and your hips instinctively moved forwards due to the unusual sensation, but Reiner’s hands kept you in place.

“Don’t run away, you can take it, can’t you?” Reiner cooed against your skin, enjoying your sounds of struggle more than he’d like to admit since he knew this was new to you.

“It’s-you’re too big,” you said through a gasp, your words almost muffled by Zeke’s lips before he allowed your head to fall to let out a small humored laugh.

“It’ll fit, trust me, you just have to be a little patient,” Zeke pushed himself further into you, being uncharacteristically slow and soft, and all you could do was take it, eyes screwed shut and mouth hanging open to let out gasps and whines. Reiner placed a final kiss to your neck before withdrawing to look at you, one of his hands cupping your face.

“It’ll feel good soon, okay?” his eyes searched for contact and he smiled when your tearful eyes found his, “You’re doing so well, sweetheart”.

You could only nod in response and lean into his touch, trying to relax your body despite how the intrusion ignited all your nerves, making you hypersensitive to the unfamiliarity. Deep breaths allowed your muscles to lose some tension, and you relaxed a little in Reiner’s arms, whimpering loudly when Zeke pressed further in before pulling out. Reiner’s eyes widened when you shrieked and hid your face in his neck when Zeke thrust gently into you, starting a small rhythm, but not forcing himself any deeper.

“That’s a good girl,” Zeke’s voice was soft, which was rare, something you appreciated. One of his hands traced down your spine while the other rested on your hip, doing everything he could to restrain himself from fucking you like he wanted, “Do you know how amazing you look like this, hm?”.

Your muscles relaxed a little more as he allowed you to adjust, a small tinge of pleasure washing over you at the change. Zeke whispered, his beard suddenly tickling your nape, “Stuffed full, like you were made just for us”.

Nodding furiously, you cry out into Reiner’s ear, “I was! I-I was made for you! Only you! Please!”.

The two men adored your carnal sounds, loving how easy you were to unravel, the both of them finding themselves smirking when their eyes met and Zeke left your nape. One of Reiner’s hands snaked down to play with your clit, feeling how swollen it was, placing it between two fingers knowing it would be too sensitive to rub directly.

“And she’s so wet,” Reiner breathed, his eyes looking down at your glistening candlelit back as you hid in his neck, “she’s already making a mess”.

And you were, your juices running down Reiner’s girth before dripping off his sack and down on the sheets below. Reiner demonstrated his statement by rubbing his fingers gently, already encouraging loud, embarrassing squelching to fill the room.

“Reiner…” you whimpered and shuddered at his action, jolting forwards as his touch elicited electric sparks up your spine. Zeke chased your hips and pushed in deeper, making your mouth hang open in a silent scream while your nails drew blood from Reiner’s arms. The feeling of intrusion softly changed, a cocoon of warmth opening in your core and wings of pleasure spreading throughout your body. With labored breaths battling through moans, a mixture of the men’s names were muffled into Reiner’s neck, and Zeke didn’t correct you. Why would he when you were taking them so well, and sounded like an angel while doing it?

Reiner’s hips started a small rhythm beneath you, carefully timed with Zeke’s, and he only chuckled when drool melted down his neck and chest, while your voice purred against his skin with nothing but sounds of euphoria. The raw pleasure ripping through your body made your fingers loosen their grip, throwing your arms around Reiner to support yourself instead, grasping at the short hair you could as you cradled his head. Reiner purred your name while softly moving his fingers, allowed to worship your neck again, his tongue licking at your salty skin before kissing softly where he knew he’d make you mewl for him.

“So perfect, princess, letting us know just how much you like it, sucking us in,” Zeke groaned while speeding up, adoring how your warm, gummy walls embraced him.

“Tell us how good you feel,” Reiner’s low voice vibrated against your throat, before nipping at the lobe of your ear, “can you do that, angel?”.

Shaking your head, you could only muster sounds as their cocks thrusted into you, and you swore you could feel them rub against each other even with a wall of tissue dividing them. Unable to speak because of their sweet assault on your body, you could only cry in pleasure as you felt yourself get close to your climax, both of them moaning at the inconsistent fluttering around their cocks.

Zeke laughed lowly and Reiner only smiled, rubbing his fingers faster around your clit, “Cum for us, sweetheart, don’t hold back”.

His deep voice was like honey in your ears, dripping with raw lust before Zeke joined in as well, and you didn’t have to look at him to know what kind of grin he was wearing while his hair was all sweaty and slicked back, “Go on, pretty girl, listen to your boyfriend”.

With every sensation combined, it didn’t take long until you shook against them, your holes pulsing around their girths; their cocks pistoning into you, Reiner’s fingers deliberate circling, his lips worshiping your neck, and then their voices to top it off, you were being thiuroghly fucked through the most mind-blowing orgasm you had experienced.

—

Which one filled you first escaped your notice, as Reiner held you tightly in his arms when you came to, his back against the bed, cock softening against your rear. His calloused hands raked softly down your back and he kissed the top of your head when he felt you move.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he mumbled, smiling as he looked at you, pink flushing his cheeks still.

“Hi..”

“You did so well,” he said softly, “did you feel good? Were we too careless?”.

He always asked you in the aftermath, like you didn’t just pass out from pleasure.

“It was good,” an exhausted smile met him, “really good”.

“Right? Told ya it would feel incredible,” Zeke’s voice boomed as he emerged from the bathroom with wet rags, stopping a moment just to look at the view in front of him. Your ass facing him, your hole gaping slightly, his cum oozing down to mix with Reiner’s before ultimately staining the sheets. Zeke clicked his tongue before chuckling.

“Dirty, dirty girl,” he walked closer and put the wet rag against you before cleaning you softly, ignoring the urge to tease your sore and sensitive parts, “letting us do such filthy things to you”.

You sighed and moaned slightly when his fingers helped the rags clean your folds as well as he could, before he threw the rag away somewhere you didn’t care enough to register. Zeke plopped down further up the bed, and with grunts and whines, you crawled up to him, Reiner following and hugging your waist while you rested your head on Zeke’s chest. 

How all this had started didn’t matter at all. Not when you fell asleep with two strong sets of arms keeping you warm.

Author’s note: It’s been some time since my last threesome with these, and this time I am actually attracted to Zeke! And it's been a whie since I've posted a fic at all.. A lot can happen when your life gets in the way and burst an organ… Anyway, thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed it!

If you want to join my taglist, you can find it here!

[redgoldsparks]

January 2024 reading and Reviews by Maia Kobabe

I post my reviews throughout the month on Storygraph and Goodreads, and do roundups here and on patreon. Reviews below the cut.

Electric Bones volume 1 by Hazel and Bell 

Lucian is the son of a minor nobleman and the CEO of the galaxy's biggest AI company, but he's not so rich that he can't get in trouble. After being fired as a programmer from Echo Station he joined a startup with a couple friends and is now fishing for funding at an elite tech expo on board an expensive and exclusive space vessel. There he sees someone he thinks he recognizes- Ezra, a grey robot, an fully sentient AI who worked on Echo Station as a researcher and partially cost Lucian his job. So why is Ezra now working on the space vessel as an escort? Unless it's not Ezra, but just a look-alike robot model? These questions drag Lucian into the beginnings of tangled web of intrigue which include kidnapping, AI-hacking, and murder. I've been reading this story online as a webcomic for years; you can still read all of volume one here: https://electricbonescomic.com/index.... But last year I also backed the kickstarter, and just sat down to re-read the whole story in print form, including a sexy little bonus comic. I love these characters, I love the rich colors, the lovely sense of flow and design of the pages. I can't wait for volume two!

The Fox Maidens by Robin Ha

Action packed and exciting, this family drama is full of unexpected twists and turns. I loved the focus on female characters: passionate Kai, whose love of martial arts and sense of justice cannot be contained by the normal rules of Joseon society; her mother, Meorhu, a fragile woman with a surprising past; Sura, a thief turned mercenary; and the Gumiho herself, the deadly but alluring fox spirit who impacts the lives of all the others with her magic and charisma. The art is rich with historical details, beautiful nature scenes, and fast paced fight scenes. Lovers of ghost stories, kdramas, and queer re-tellings of fairy tales will find much to enjoy here. I was lucky enough to read an advanced copy of this book! Pre-order it now, or look for it in bookstores in mid-February 2024.

A Nobleman’s Guide to Seducing a Scoundrel by KJ Charles read by Martyn Swain

What a delightful return to Romney marsh! This book picks up 13 years after the dramatic conclusion of the previous installment. Luke Doomsday is now a secretary, looking for a new position in a large house were he can keep books and solve his master's problems. Rufus, the recently minted Earl of Oxney, formerly a major in the army and son of a draper, has problems. For one, he never expected to inherit and his uncle is doing everything he can to prove Rufus illegitimate in court. For another, the previous Earl of Oxney was a selfish old bastard who let the estates fall into terrible disrepair, while Rufus' timid cousin kept poor account of the estate's money in a chicken scratch handwriting. Rufus struggles to read at the best of times, and he can barely make sense of his newly inherited account books. When Luke shows up on his door, it feels like a godsend. The men are immediately attracted to each other, though both have reason to be wary. And Luke, in seems, may have come to Stone Manor looking for more than a job. This series is such a fun mix of spicy romance, action, mystery, and danger. I'm really enjoying the setting and time period, which is just after the end of the Napoleonic wars. I really hope there will be more books to come!

Translation State by Ann Leckie

No one is doing it like Ann Leckie! This sci-fi novel uses six different pronoun sets (actually kind of seven, except one is the same set just used culturally very differently by different groups of people). It’s fantastic. We’ve got they/them, e/em/eir, sie/hir, it/its, he/him, she/her, and she/her again except used as a universal pronoun regardless of gender (which works great inside the Radch Empire and badly outside of it). I'm on the fence about whether this book can be read as a stand alone, or if it would only really make sense after having read at the Imperial Radch trilogy and Providence. I suppose it depends on what level of baffling alien customs and politics you are willing to tolerate. This book opens with Enae attending hir grandmaman's funeral, only to learn that the seemingly wealthy old woman had sold her entire estate to a stranger before her death. For the first time in her life, Enae leaves home with a Foreign Affairs job: to see out a fugitive who left Presger space some 200 years prior. Enae isn't expecting to succeed, but sie gives it hir best shot- and in doing so completely upends the lives of a widening circle of bystanders including Reet, a man of unknown parentage, and Qven, a juvenile Presger. This book finally begins to explain this inhuman and terrifying species, and the reason why the Presger-Radachii Treaty defines the rules of so much of this universe. I deeply enjoyed this installment; it makes me want to go back and re-read the original trilogy.

Brooms by Jasmine Walls and Teo Duvall 

Set in an alternate 1930s, Mississippi, this story follows a group of friends and found family who have to hide their magic from the restrictive and racist government. They survive at the margins, but they don't let the fear of prosecution stop them from doing what they love: racing together as a team. Deep in the woods seers and witches host carnival like events where racers on brooms compete for prize money and glory. Each of them has reasons why they need to win; lives and futures depend on it. This book is deeply queer with a diverse and magical cast. If you're looking for historical fiction where the trans and lesbian brown witches win, this one's for you.

Boys Weekend by Mattie Lubchansky

Sammie is a recently out nonbinary transfemm but their college friend group has not picked up on that fact yet. When Sammie is invited to be the "best man" at their friend Adam's wedding and attend a bachelor weekend at a high-tech, no-laws resort built on top of the Pacific Garbage Patch they decide to go in stealth mode. The resort is a pyramid scheme mutated with a strip club, business conference, all you can drink brunch bar, pro-gamer, most-dangerous-game corporate nightmare. Also, the waters around it are infested with terrifying flesh-eating monsters and someone is trying to raise an eldritch god. It takes every bit of queer resistance Sammie possesses to survive this bleak, hilarious, and surprisingly moving tale. In both their fiction and nonfiction comics, Lubchansky continues to hold up the black mirror to our own dystopian times.

Belle of the Ball by Mari Costa 

A very queer high school rom-com comic with a satisfying message about growing into yourself and seeing others truly for who they are. It opens with a love triangle, but subverts that form into a more complicated shape by the end of the tale. Strong character designs and very effective limited color palette.

The Moth Keeper by K. O’Neill 

In a desert village, a group of folks choose to live a nocturnal life to keep the moon company, and to care for a small group of magical moths, the only creatures who can pollinate a magical tree which helps sustain the whole ecosystem. One youngster, Anya, volunteers for the important but lonely job of Moth Keeper. She yearns to be of service to others, and feels she must earn her place in the village. In reality, help and friendship are only an ask away, and in this space everyone is cared for. This is a very beautifully illustrated and brief tale of responsibility, community, and resilience.

Feeding Ghosts by Tessa Hulls

What an accomplishment! I savored every page of Feeding Ghosts, absolutely floored by the labor and courage that went into the writing of this book. The inking is gorgeous, the history is clear, digestible, and devastating. This book threads the line between honesty and compassion in a way that I appreciate so much in any memoir, but especially one dealing with family. Hulls lays out the story of three generations of women starting with her grandmother, Sun Yi, a Shanghai journalist who faced intense persecution during the rise of Communism in China, who penned a popular and scandalous memoir and then suffered a mental breakdown. This left her only daughter, Rose, a student at an elite boarding school with no parental figures and no other family to lean on. Eventually Rose earned a scholarship to an American university and in the end moved her mother into her California home. Sun Yi haunted that home during the author's own childhood. The unexamined trauma and codependency of Sun Yi and Rose drove the author to the extreme edges of the Earth, seeking freedom from their ghosts. But in the end, she stopped running from her family history and turned, instead, to face it. Shelve this book with Maus, Fun Home, Persepolis and The Best We Could Do.

I Keep My Exoskeletons To Myself by Marisa Crane read by Bailey Carr 

I really struggled with this book. I almost DNFed at 25%. Ultimately, I did finish it, and I am glad I did because I think the final act was my favorite part of the story. However, I think the title and cover set me up with expectations of what this book would be which were very different than what the book actually delivered. This is not science fiction- despite the fact it was nominated in the science fiction category in the Goodreads Choice Awards. It is only barely speculative. This is a book about grief, depression, and parenting a baby and then a young child as a single mom struggling with loss and borderline alcoholism. There were passages of the book which struck hard, individual observations and lines which rang like bells. There is also nearly no plot and I was frustrated by the lack of world building. I wanted to know more about the laws governing extra shadows- were Shadesters allowed to vote, hold passports, travel across state lines? Had anyone experimented with the removal of Shadows? When and how did cameras get installed in apparently every home in American, and how did the government hire and pay for a workforce of seemingly 1:1 surveillance agents to citizens? Also, how on earth did Kris manage to pay for a whole apartment on a single salary working a call center job, especially when as a Shadester she had to pay extra taxes? I understand that this is literary fiction, and these questions are obviously not the ones the book was interested in answering. But it felt strange to me that a book so focused on parenting would not include a single passage about struggling to pay for or arrange childcare. The "pop quizzes" that break up the text did not work well in audio, and did not add anything to my experience of this book. Ultimately, I would only recommend this novel to a vary narrow audience of readers who enjoy lit fic, and are willing to spend a lot of time in the POV of a character teetering on the edge of a mental breakdown through much of the story.

Atana and The Firebird by Vivian Zhou

Atana is a mermaid, but she was banished from her home to live alone on island for a reason she doesn't understand. One night a curious young firebird leaves her flock in space to come down and visit Earth, and she convinces Atana to go an adventure. They are soon pursed by magic hunters, but they also make friends, and end up as invited guests in the Witch Queen's palace. She makes them welcome in her massive library and gardens, but she also has ulterior motives. This is a fast paced story of magic, friendship, and young people slowly learning about the forces larger than themselves that shape their world and their lives. I really enjoyed the art, it has a very active, energetic line which serves the action scenes particularly well. I can tell the author came from an animation background! I am glad that the ending set up potential future installments in this world.

Portrait of a Body by Julie Delporte  

I really loved the colored pencil illustrations of this book, especially the botanical drawings, and the kind of abstract relation of the text and images. I thought the drawings paired extremely well with the hand lettering even if at times I struggled with some of the cursive capitals. This is a candid memoir of recovering from sexual assault and a dysfunctional relationship to ones body and sexuality, of stepping into queerness and self-acceptance. I couldn't really relate to the author's journey, but I appreciated the honestly and thoughtfulness with which the more challenging themes were handled.

Fool’s Fate by Robin Hobb read by Nick Taylor 

This book, and this series, has earned Robin Hobb a permanent place in my list of favorite authors. This story goes so hard, weaving together threads that are 9 volumes and 30 plus years of in-story history in the making. The final confrontations, reunions, and farewells at the end of this story were hard earned and so well written. This very much felt like it could have been a final volume of the Realm of Elderlings series, but I know that there are 7 more books to come and I can't wait to see what else this series has in store for me!

System Collapse by Martha Wells read by Kevin R Free 

This book picks up right after the end of the previous volume and I had, unfortunately, completely forgotten most of the previous plot. Once I got myself oriented I still had a great time with it. Wow, I just love watching Murderbot learn and grow and solve problems in unique and interesting ways! I kind of want to go back and re-listen to the whole series.

The Chromatic Fantasy by H.A. 

This comic blew me away. One of the most beautiful, strange, artistically ambitious and deeply trans books I've read in a while. Aesthetically, its as rich as a stained glass window or illuminated manuscript. Its narrative is psychedelic but emotionally it rings so tender and true. The story opens with Jules, a transman trapped in a nunnery who accepts a deal with a devil who promises to help him live as a man. Possessed and impervious to physical harm, Jules turns to a life of debauchery and crime. Then he meets another trans criminal, the poetic thief and thespian Casper, and they begin to fall for each other. They see each other as no one else ever has, they validate and treasure one another, but Jules' devil is a jealous master. The devil would rather see Jules burn than thrive. This is one of those books that made me want to draw, made me want to write, made me want to be bolder, weirder, freer, wilder in my story telling. An instant favorite, I expect I'll return to this over and over.

Mall Goth by Kate Leth

Liv's parents are on the verge of divorce; they've just moved to a new town and Liv will be starting at a new high school. At her last school, Liv was bullied for being openly queer and an unapologetic mall goth, and she is understandably hesitant to accept friendship overtures at the new school. However, a supportive male English teacher and a fellow goth gamer boy start to make Liv feel welcome. The goth introduces her to an MMORPG and the English teacher praises her essays and gives her Lolita. Both of them start regularly DMing Liv late into the night, more than is appropriate for the relationships they have. This book is in large part about a teen navigating confusing advances and how and when to disclose things that make her uncomfortable but feel hard to speak about or define. I thought that aspect of the story was handled very well. Some of the pacing in the friendship plot lines surrounding it felt a bit rushed, a few sections underdeveloped, but ultimately I think this book tackled an important issue not often seen in YA comics. It is also steeped in early 2000s Hot Topic/emo music/pop culture references- if you were there, you'll know.

What’s Wrong? Personal Histories of Chronic Pain and Bad Medicine by Erin Williams 

Williams illuminates, through memoir, interviews, and mixed media illustrations the extreme failures of the US healthcare system to address chronic pain. These failures are especially common for patients of color, patients who struggle with addictions, patients who are queer or survivors of assault and trauma. If you had any illusions that the systems of medical care are working in this country, shed them now. This book is half cathartic, half infuriating to read. I really appreciated the honesty and vulnerability of the interviewees and the trans and nonbinary inclusiveness of the language surrounding pain tied to the reproductive system.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s1 episode 24 thoughts

aka SEASON FINALE! wow, one full season with these nerds... time flies <3

this episode was super fast-paced and full of twists and turns, straight from the beginning. we open on a very jerky chase scene that was hard to watch and which set the mood as a guy was shot and then jumps into some water and no one can find him

!! the title sequence changed !! it said "trust no one" rather than "the truth is out there"!! surely this means something, but what? i'm spooked!

mulder is sleeping on his couch again. can we please start a fund to get his ass a mattress. it's getting serious.

looks like he fell asleep working on a case when a phone call from deep throat wakes him up, telling him to change the channel where he sees the news of the opening car chase and records it on his VCR (how vintage!)

he shows the footage to scully who is basically like why do we trust this deep throat fellow- a valid question, as mulder trusts almost everybody like a little baby duckling- but scully referring to him as "deep throat" means they've discussed the subject before, which is interesting

we then visit a scientist who is working on monkeys. scully, for some reason, wants to say hello to the monkeys- perhaps we can chalk this up to her innate goodness

the scientist is like "leave those monkeys alone" and she says "i'm sorry, i thought they were friendly" scully, you should know that monkeys are NEVER friendly! they tried to bite her but thank god they missed because these are, after all, no ordinary monkeys, but Alien Monkeys

after the monkey business scully is pissed because they have no leads and she says we need to wrap this up! we've learned nothing! ohh i wrote this next part down word for word because it gagged me:

mulder is so trusting of deep throat and scully says he's stringing mulder along for some unknown purpose...

to which he says: "you think he does it because he gets off on it?"

and scully replies "no, i think he does it because YOU do"

oh i gasped and yelled at my screen! she got him! valid question though, why is this guy leaving them little clues beyond his earlier in the season confession of alien murder guilt? it IS suspicious.

mulder and deep throat confront each other and play more sick and twisted mind games which is fine; deep throat insinuates that mulder doesn't care as much as he used to which is rude but it spurs him on his quest for answers

next the monkey scientist kicks the bucket which obviously means his monkey science was deeply important

the guy who was doing the running during the car chase confessed to being underwater for 3 days after he was shot which obviously has implications but we aren't given a whole lot of time to explore them

back at the monkey lab, now a crime scene, mulder hands scully a flask of mysterious liquid and says "what do you think this is". she says "i don't know" then runs on a quest to go find out because he asks her to. god, dana scully has really had to endure SO much with this man, and now a mystery liquid from the monkey lab? again i ask where her compensation is

mulder breaks into the dead scientist's house, which revealed another basic and universal truth akin to gravity: if no one lets mulder in a house, he Will find a way to break in. he cozies up to the dead guy's desk and starts flipping through his stuff, and the runaway underwater alien guy calls and he picks up the phone like this is a typical day for him. alien guy is emitting some sort of gas that hurts everyone which is unfortunate.

scully fell asleep on the couch of the microbiology department which was soooo <3 but then the lab scientist comes in with the plot twist...

monkey liquid reveal: it has some sort of secret bacteria... with a new base pair! which means it HAS to be some sort of extraterrestrial life!

mulder tracks down a storage unit that is filled with bodies in tanks, and he looks like a kid in a demented candy store while some crazy orchestral stuff goes on in the background. then he is chased by some people but leaps over a fence with astonishing agility.

scully realizes that the monkey liquid is actually Very Important and they meet up to explore the tanks and she says she's sorry for doubting him. "i should know by now to trust your instincts" she says, to which he replies "why, nobody else does" and they both smile and it is not emotional at all, shut up!

"you know, i've always held science as sacred. i've always put my trust in the accepted facts. and what i saw last night... for the first time in my life, i don't know what to believe" <- banger scully line

(i don't believe that this is the first time she's questioned it, though. she's been on edge the whole time, this is just the most she has been. she was thrown off by the psychic who quoted her dad, and by the alien bites in the very first episode. regardless, character development!)

((also, love that she talks about holding science as sacred while wearing a cross necklace in every scene. she's got that "raised catholic" aura about her))

gasp! just as i knew it would be, the room of tanks is now entirely empty, all cleared out except for... deep throat? he reveals that this is the place where the first alien-human hybrids were developed out of terminally ill patients, who got better, but developed superhuman strength and the ability to breathe underwater. a valid tradeoff, in many ways, and exactly what has happened to our friend who was shot and hid underwater and now gives off noxious gas. so now they have to find him before the Others do.

mulder runs back to the dead guy's house, which he seems far too comfortable entering, and finds the alien hybrid man. alien man tries to choke him out, but mulder still says "i'll protect you"

(man, i love that line. we Will be psychoanalyzing that at a later date)

but alien man is shot by an intruder, and his noxious gasses burn mulder while he's tied up. poor scully has been blowing up his cellphone, to which he mumbles "i'm a popular guy"

(always with the damn one liners while he's beaten within an inch of his life; you are popular to one individual, mister mulder, but granted she's a very special one)

deep throat says scully can get into a high containment facility and trade the alien tissue for mulder which okay. sure. why not? she guesses the mystery password and gets into the building and. well. this was my reaction:

"she's opening a mystery container and i lowkey expect a frozen head but NO IT'S AN ALIEN THINGY AUGHHHH IT'S LIKE A BABY"

gross!

only 6 minutes left in the episode at this point and i was stressed! scully's got a box full of alien, is meeting deep throat on a bridge, and refuses to hand the alien box over because. again. who tf is this guy? he gets all mad and says that she NEEDS to hand the box over because these guys that they're dealing with took some of the alien tissue and injected it in children.

and this maybe was supposed to get her to hurry up but she was just like. nah why the hell would we give them the alien back? so we can get more alien children?

to save mulder, of course! because they are the only two who can shine light on what is really going on!

(don't talk to her in such a condescending manner, deep throat, i will bite you. she has perfectly valid reservations about handing ur mysterious ass a box full of alien. but she finally does)

and then as he hands the box over to the mystery people HE IS IMMEDIATELY SHOT! i gasped so hard here i actually hurt my mouth which is still recovering from surgery and so all of us had a bad time around this point. they do toss mulder from the back of a car, though, and deep throat's dying words are to "trust no one"

(so is it really mulder that we have back? if we can trust no one, does that mean someone has hacked into mulder? and scully doesn't know that? that's what i'm guessing here. sort of a winter soldier-ish situation)

13 days later, mulder calls scully in the middle of the night and says the fbi is shutting down the x files and they're being reassigned, but he won't give up, he can't give up. he says someone named "skinner" made this decision. i am unfamiliar with this individual but have a feeling we will become acquainted.

the season ends with the alien being placed in a mysterious room. to this i wrote the following:

"alien baby in formaldehyde in an archive i would kill to get my hands on it let me see it let me see it let me see it NOW"

(i bet they also have JFK's brain in that archive!)

so what a whirlwind of an episode! we certainly can't trust anyone moving forward, but does that apply to the trust between mulder and scully themselves? what will they do now that the x files have been shut down? somehow i have a feeling they will come back, a sort of hunch to do with the 10 more seasons of this show.

will they meet up for coffee during their new assignments? who is skinner? so much awaits us on the other side of this season, but i still need to process all i've seen so far!

[ahoppingmagician]

Yo another Helluva Boss Rant, Part Five thousand.

People are really out here saying we can't watch Helluva Boss and Hazbin Hotel as if they are some holy artefact. This may sound harsh but fuck off with that bullshit. Any show, movie, comic, and artist can be criticised for anything, yes some criticism is unhelpful I'll give you that, but at the end of the day, people can give their opinion on anything. Also, hate watching is a thing, a great example would be watching a bad movie because you love how horrible it is for example The Room, The Twilight movies, The 50 Shades of Grey Movies, or Any Disney Live Action Remake. All of these are absolute trash heaps but most people watch them over and over again because it's something to laugh at for a good while.

Vivzipop is a horrible person.

I might be harassed for a while but it needs to be said Viv is a horrible employer and person. She pays her animation staff dirt for all the hours they slave away on her intricate character designs, the fast paced action scenes, the more "heartfelt" scenes only to get low pay. Also her stopping her employees from finding better work like Lackadaisy, as we seen with the discord chat where an animator was explained to that Viv called them words like manic, insane, crazy just so they could find no other opportunities forcing them to stay with her. That isn't how you treat anyone, and if you think differently then I'm sorry to break it to you you're a bad person.

Of course the ableism, look as someone who has been called the R word multiple times in my life, I'm not offended by it being used in an adult show but only if you make it clear that it is a harmful word, unlike Viv who constantly teases the word as if it's funny to say, but like the coward she is never says it. JUST SAY IT AND BE DONE WITH IT. Yes I'll bust your balls about it but atleast it proves to me that you have some gumption.

I'm not a POC I'm far from it but I feel like this show can give people the wrong idea about women of colour. For Example, Millie is a bloodthirsty and adoring wife, but that's it she doesn't appear unless her husband is around or even does anything without Moxxie's approval. Also, it paints her as aggressive which is a common stereotype of black women. Verosika is a bitter ex of Blitzo and nothing more, wait I forgot a woman who enjoys sex. Now there is nothing wrong with sex or sex workers but again at this time that is all she is in the show and of course a discussion can be held about the objectification of POC in a sexual manner. Also Barbie....who is a fucking groomer and addict. These are three Canon Women of Colour and that's what we got, in my opinion not a good enough representation, because all these female characters are one note and objectively horrible people, also all are painted as angry and all of them have had at least two comments about their sex lives.

If these don't prove that Vivien M is not atleast a a ignorant person or at worst a awful human being then I can't explain to you anything, because your just choosing to be blind to reality.

As always you look great today/ tonight. l, have a wonderful day/night, and praise the frog lord.

[electronickingdomfox]

"Crisis on Centaurus" review

Novel from 1986, by Brad Ferguson. This one has a very "80's American action movie" feel. From the terrorist attack on a country incidentally called "New America", to the incursion into the Pentagon (I mean, the "Centaurus Defense Center"), up to the obligatory car chase (only that they're flying cars). There are also plenty of references to American brands, that supposedly would have survived into the 23rd century. Though the constant mention of money seems a bit weird (I thought money was a thing from the past in Star Trek? Might be wrong, though). Also, the terrorists are racists that want to see their country free of alien influences (and it's made abundantly clear that for them, "alien influences" include also any non-white human). It's a fast-paced novel, and keeps the reader's attention at all times, though I don't think there's much more to it than that.

The cover would suggest that Joanna McCoy plays a big role in the story. In reality, she appears very, very little, the same as her father. The other characters, however, get a fair amount of exposure, including Uhura (who gets the con for a large part of the story), Scotty (who's given an even more Scottish engineer partner), Chekov (with his own mini-romance subplot) and Sulu. As it's usual with many of these novels, Kirk seemed to me a bit off. At times, he's more Bruce Willis than Kirk here. And I have difficulty imagining him as a land-owner who's been investing in the Centaurian countryside all these years (if the movies had shown anything at this point, it's that Kirk's heart was never on land). Anyway, I don't know why getting Kirk right is so hard, while Spock and McCoy are usually fine; it might be due to the subtleties of Kirk's character. Another noteworthy thing, is that this novel often presents the thoughts of the characters, to a greater degree than other books.

Spoilers under the cut:

The first chapter already sets things into motion at a breakneck pace. A suspicious guy is waiting in the New Athens spaceport (a city of New America, in the planet Centaurus). When two policemen recognize him as a certain Holtzman, he gets arrested, and in a panic, he activates a minuscule piece of antimatter inside the box... A microsecond later, New Athens doesn't exist anymore, being replaced by a giant, smoldering crater.

Meanwhile, the Enterprise is having problems of its own. The computers have been completely fucked up, and nobody knows why: there's no air circulation, no temperature regulation, no artificial gravity, nothing... The scene of everybody floating around, while Sulu's scalding shower water floats through the corridors as a giant ball, is actually pretty funny. Scotty and his new partner, MacPherson, manage to reestablish some sense of order, but the ship is seriously crippled. Repairs will have to wait, though, since Starfleet orders the Enterprise to assist in the Centaurus crisis. There's been at least a million deaths in the explosion; possibly among them several relatives of the crew, including McCoy's daughter: Joanna. However, the tachyon cloud released by the antimatter explosion has made all subspace communications impossible, so Centaurus is isolated. For his part, Spock investigates the computer malfunction, and finds out a mysterious hole that has pierced several computer banks at exactly the same point; however, he can't make heads or tails of it.

Upon approaching Centaurus, they discover that other relief ships in orbit have been reduced to debris. And a transmission through conventional radio (the only radio that can penetrate the tachyon cloud) warns the Enterprise not to approach. Sure enough, the ship is attacked by a nuclear missile from Centaurus. It seems the Defense Center has gone crazy after the explosion, and now launches missiles at any approaching ship, friend or foe. Fortunately, the Defense computers consider the Enterprise anihillated after the first strike, so they don't continue the attack. Kirk leaves in a shuttle with Sulu, to meet with the new government at the temporary capital of McIverton. While Spock leaves with Chekov in another shuttle, to investigate the Defense Center and deactivate the missile system.

There's a brief interlude, that presents some suspicious guys (led by this Barclay dude) hiding at a safe house. It's obvious they're related to the terrorist attack, and Barclay instructs some of his goons to meet with a certain person, and force him to cooperate.

In McIverton, Kirk meets with the new president, the Minister of Defense, and the Minister of Internal Security (Nathaniel Burke). The president explains that the terrorist attack was done by a racist political group, led by the scientist Holtzman, to get more power for his group.

At the Defense Center, Spock is unable to reprogram the computer to differentiate between friendly and hostile ships. So he's like "well, let's blow up this bazillion missiles in the sun and problem solved!" (and yeah, this is totally in-character for Spock; the guy is that crazy sometimes). Thus, Spock expands the defense area of the computer to include Alpha Centauri, the computer interprets the sun as a hostile element, and launches all the remaining missiles at it. Poof! After solving this problem, Spock takes the shuttle to the northern area of New Athens, where there have been some survivors. A makeshift hospital has been established in a park, and there they find Joanna working as a nurse, safe and sound. There's a moving reunion between her and McCoy, who stays behind to help the injured. While Spock's shuttle makes trips to the Enterprise to bring medical supplies.

At McIverton, Kirk is visited at his hotel by the lawyer Samuel Cogley (from the episode Court Martial). Cogley explains that he was approached by Barclay to defend them at a Federation trial, and not on Centaurus (which has a death penalty for terrorism). And Kirk, despite not having the slightest sympathy for the criminals, considers that the matter belongs in a Federation court and vows to fulfill his duty. However, that same morning, Sulu appears drugged in bed, and the hotel surrounded by Burke's men. The Minister isn't going to let the terrorists off the hook, since he lost his family in the explosion. Kirk, Sulu and Cogley make a frantic escape in a flying car (well, not so frantic for Sulu, who's still sleeping like a log). They retrieve Barclay and his men, and take refuge in Kirk's cabin in Garrovick Valley (a beautiful, secluded forest area that Kirk bought a long time ago).

In the final part, Kirk and his companions barricade themselves inside the cabin, surrounded by Burke's troops. Until the Enterprise, having received a faint distress signal from the cabin, comes to the rescue... by entering the godamn atmosphere!! (didn't I say earlier that Spock's totally nuts?). Cogley decides to just bring the terrorists to the Federation, but not represent them, when it's made obvious that they were also involved in Holtzman's attack. The rest of the antimatter bombs, that the terrorists kept as leverage, are also identified and deactivated. While New Athens is slowly reconstructed, by the joint effort of the locals and new relief ships from all over the Federation.

As for the strange holes in the Enterprise computer banks... Spock ends up concluding that they were caused by a minuscule black hole, which existed just for a fraction of second, and the Enterprise traversed at warp speed. Does it mean that, at any time, at any place, a mini-black hole could appear out of nowhere and just pierce you like that!? That's the stuff of nightmares, really...

Spirk Meter: 5/10*. Kirk wants to show Spock his "special, secret place" (no! not THAT!, I mean his valley at Centaurus). Kirk considers that Spock would appreciate its aesthetic beauty, and invites him to stay there with him as long as he wants. Spock is also a bit hurt because Kirk didn't tell him about the valley earlier. Actually, the rating could be a bit higher, considering that the cabin is said to have just a twin bed, and a massage bed for two. Apart from this, Kirk notices things about Spock that nobody else seems to see (like Spock swallowing nervously sometimes). The two of them interact very little in the novel, though, since they take separate paths.

Some Spones too. When Spock meets Joanna, he finds her strikingly similar to McCoy and... magnificient. He thinks of her as a "softer McCoy, pretty without glamour", which says a little about how he sees the doctor himself. Also, when McCoy is in emotional turmoil upon learning that Joanna is alive, after so many days of uncertainty, Spock says to himself: "I know that feeling well, Doctor. Draw strength from me, if you need it." (only that McCoy has no telepathy so... how is he going to hear that!?).

And then there's the McKirk. A flashback chapter presents a young Ensign Kirk recovering from a wound at a starbase hospital. There he first meets this kind Dr. McCoy, who helps him through the painful months of recovery. After Kirk is healed, McCoy invites him to stay with him at Centaurus, where his daughter lives with some relatives. And McCoy brings Jim to these beautiful woods and wilderness areas, just the two of them and Joanna, and well... you know. It's even more evident, because McCoy is relieved upon seeing that Joanna approves of Jim (seems like the little girl was troublesome with most of her daddy's dates). Too bad for poor McCoy, that Kirk ends up inviting a pretty nurse (and then Spock) to his cabin, and not him...

*A 10 in this scale is the most obvious spirk moments in TOS. Think of the back massage, "You make me believe in miracles", or "Amok Time" for example.

[annaraebananawriter]

It’s Stupid, Really

Well, well, well. What do we have here? Why, it’s another oneshot based off of some tweets from @dreemurr-skelememer, this time about Dream having a panic attack/ptsd episode in front of Nightmare, how interesting!

I did change a few small details, but the overall idea is the same. I just got into a flow while writing it and rid the flow until the end. 

Also, fun fact: I had planned to write this in January. I got all the dialogue written in my document and everything and then never touched it until now. I had originally planned to do it from Nightmare’s POV, but apparently that was the wrong move, because I looked at it again and decided to write from Dream’s POV instead, and I kid you not that the exact second I made that decision, I knew how to do it.

All the motivation I was missing came flooding in.

So, maybe all that advice about scenes maybe needing to be written from a different POV than what you planned is true. 

And the pacing of this might be fast, maybe too fast, but I think it reads well. Reads like you’re short of breath, I think.

Now, I...I don’t have much else to add. Happy reading, I guess!!!

Fandom: Undertale/UTMV

Characters:   Dream, Nightmare (Who belong to Joku), and mentioned Ink (Who belongs to Comyet), mentioned Bad Sanses, and mentioned Blue (Who belongs to P0pcornPr1nce)

Warnings: A panic attack and/or a PTSD episode, calling a panic attack and/or PTSD episode ‘stupid’, and self-hate, and I think that’s it. Let me know!

Summary: “ A party with a big crowd of people triggers a panic attack for Dream, who gets lost in memories of the Apple Incident. Luckily, or unluckily, depending, Nightmare is also at this party and is also the closest person available for Dream to cling to. (UTMV, Dream Sans Centric)”

Word Count: 3240

~oOo~

Dream tries to hunch himself over to appear smaller. Maybe he can blend into the crowd and can slip out of here soon.

Ink had heard of a party in some AU and really wanted to go. He tried to get both Dream and Blue to go with him, but Blue already had things to do. Dream, on the other hand, had a rather boring day planned of lying in bed and thinking for hours, and he felt bad because he wanted to say no but didn’t have a real excuse, so he ended up saying yes. Ink was excited, however, and they arrived rather early.

One would think that arriving early would help him get used to the size of the crowd, but the more skeletons he watched enter, the worse he felt. He was offered a drink multiple times and could politely deny only a few times before people got suspicious, wondering if he was alright. He grabbed some water to make people stop asking. It seemed to work, so his next problem was getting lost in the crowd until he could escape to a quieter part of the building. It made him uncomfortable, being surrounded by people, but he forced himself to work through it, sipping at his drink.

Oh, look. An exit was right in front of him, and only a few skeletons were in the way.

He sighs in relief, clutching his drink like a lifeline.

“Hey, Dream!” A Sans he’s only seen a couple of times from an AU he can’t remember the name of shouts, leaning on him. He grabs Dream’s drink out of his hands. “Why’re you just drinking water? Let me get you a real drink.”

“Oh, no thank you, I…” Dream starts, but the Sans stumbles off anyway. He cringes, sighs, and backs away, aiming to huddle into a corner and be invisible until the end of the party.

On his way, more people shout, gleeful about something happening further into the crowd, and he flinches. People shift, aiming to get a closer look at all the commotion, and he tries to elbow his way through as gently as he can. He stumbles and gets dragged into the crowd, people pushing him multiple ways.

He cringes again, trying to escape, but can’t find a gap to squeeze through. Is it just him, or is it really hot in here all of a sudden?

“You absolute beast!” Someone shouts, sparking laughter—

No, no, not laughter, jeers. People whisper to each other, nasty things about his brother—

No, no, no, not about his brother, just comments on whatever is going on—

No, wait. More people are shouting, some proclaiming that they knew it, some hurling insults, some just scoffing in disbelief—

In disgust.

Someone in front of him shifts to the right. He catches a glimpse of a skeleton huddled on the ground, curled up by the base of something—

A tree, Mother—

No, stop, stop being stupid—

And something rolling on the ground in front of them—

An apple—

Stop.

Dream’s breath hitches.

He steps back, turning, trying to get away from it, telling himself it wasn’t real, it couldn’t be real. It was the past. He wasn’t there anymore, he left long ago. This wasn’t happening. Someone shoves at him—

And if this wasn’t real, would he still feel that? He can’t tell.

There are more leers and someone whoops, throwing something in the air—

Rocks rain down on Mother.

Nightmare tries to talk over all the noise, frantically explaining himself, but no one is listening.

Dream tries to fight his way through, get in front of the crowd, in front of his friends. He’s confused because they never acted this mean before. They keep throwing rocks, and he knows being hit with a rock hurts, so why are they throwing them at Nighty?

Something is wrong, something is wrong, something is wrong.

The wrongness fills him in rhythm with his footsteps. He’s breathing heavily, using all of his efforts to get out of this blasted crowd and find Nighty and get him away from all of this noise. His brother doesn’t like loud noises anymore. He doesn’t know why, but that doesn’t matter, because this is a loud noise and Nighty hates it here, he’s sure of it.

They need to get out.

Dream runs—

Stop, stop, stop, get out of here, this isn’t right, move on, move away—

Find Nighty and protect him, find him and protect him, find him and protect him—

Hurry, hurry, hurry—

With a final shove, he steps out in front of the crowd and looks up frantically, searching.

Only, Mother isn’t here. Neither is Nighty.

Blinking, he turns, facing the crowd of villagers, but this crowd is warped, wrong. They are all wrong. He doesn’t recognize any of them. He backs away from them, confused and worried and alarmed. His back presses against a wall and he stops breathing.

He can’t move.

He can’t move.

He can’t move anymore, something hardening his body and making him numb—

No, no, no, no, no. Not happening. You’re not there.

Stop being stupid.

He needs to find his brother. He needs to find him. They’re in danger. Nighty’s in danger. They need to find each other and run before it all goes wrong. They need to escape.

Where is his brother? Where is he? Where—

The word looks dizzy, he feels dizzy—

There’s someone beside him and—

“Dream?”

—They know his name.

Dream blinks.

The breath he was holding escapes him in a gasp.

The person beside them is dark and blurry. He can’t make out many details. Something moves behind them. Another villager? Then that means this is a villager. Not one that he recognizes, though. But maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe they can help.

They might know where Nightmare is.

“Dream, what…” the villager starts, confused, and concerned. Dream jolts into action, frantically grabbing onto their shoulders. His hands slid, almost like he was grabbing at oil. That’s odd. It’s familiar, too. Odd. He tightens his grip. “Hey! Get off—”

They don’t like that very much. Dream doesn’t care what they do or don’t like as long as they help him. “Have you seen my brother?”

The villager stills. “Huh?”

Frustrated, his fingers twitch. He glances around as the villager takes a moment to reorient themselves.

No Mother, no brother. Still the same.

His chest is beginning to tighten again.

“What?”

“My brother.” Dream exhales sharply at the villager’s confusion. “Looks like me, exactly like me. Just wears purple instead. It’s his favorite colour.” He doesn’t know why he mentioned that. The villager didn’t need to know that. Can’t he do anything right? “Have you seen him? I need to find him. I need to find him. Fast.”

The villager laughs harshly in disbelief. “Is—Is this a joke or something? Dream—”

“It’s not safe here. Not safe. I need to find Nighty. I need to get to him. It’s not safe here.” Dream explains, glancing around again. No change. Has it gotten hotter? He feels like he’s sweating a lot. “We’re in danger. Very bad, bad danger. He’s in danger. I need to find him. Have you seen him? Please tell me where he is.”

“Dream…”

Though he hears the villager try to speak, Dream rushes over him, impatient. “Tell me, please. Tell me, tell me, tell me. Please. I need to get there in time. I can’t be late again. Things—” He chokes on a breath and something pricks at his sockets, the edges of his vision darkening. “I can’t lose him. I can’t. He’s all I have. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please…” His voice cracks and he repeats the word over and over.

Please help him, please, please, please—

Please save Nighty, please, please, please, please—

Please, please, please, please—

He’s being led somewhere. Is the villager helping him?

Please, please, please, please—

The music—when did that start? Where even was he?—fades the further they get.

Please, please, please, please—

Doors shut behind them.

Dream can’t see anything anymore; he’s panicking too much.

Where was he? Where is Nightmare? He needs to find Nightmare.

The villager makes him sit down. He frowns, trying to get up. He can’t rest now, not when Nighty needs him. The villager doesn’t let him up.

“Breathe, Dream.”

He is breathing. Isn’t he? Maybe he’s not. Maybe he’s dead and that’s why this place is so unfamiliar and Nighty wasn’t here and, and, and—

“Breathe.”

He’s breathing. He’s trying.

He wants his brother.

“I’m right here. Keep breathing, slowly. Match me. In…out. Good. You’re not in the village, Dream. Okay? You’re not there.”

But wasn’t he just…?

“You haven’t been there in years. We’re both safe. It’s okay.”

But it wasn’t. It wasn’t okay.

He needs to—

“Keep breathing, focus on breathing.”

Dream wants to scowl. He wants to frown and complain that he is doing all of that and it’s not helping. But he doesn’t, he instead inhales—

And his chest lightens a bit.

He squeezes his eyes shut, and exhales, trying to do as ordered.

His chest continues to lighten, cracks appearing in the stone as patches fall off of him—

You’re not there. You haven’t been there in years. Focus, Dream.

But it all feels so real.

And he can practically taste the apple on his tongue, the smell of negativity in the air—

And he inhales—

And the feel of a smooth staff in his hand, fabric clenched in his fist, tinging in his legs as he’s turned to stone—

And he exhales—

And the sound of wind and silence and manic laughter—

And he breathes—

And he sees—

And he—

And…

And he blinks, sockets aching.

And he sees the darkness in his vision fading. It bubbles away, letting his surroundings take its place. He’s sitting against the railing of the balcony of the building. One of them, at least. The bars bite into his back. There’s a faint breeze, carrying the smell of flowers from the garden below. It’s nice.

And Nightmare is in front of him, kneeling, hand outstretched and hovering.

Dream blinks in surprise.

Nightmare looks concerned, eye wide.

They stare at each other for a moment.

Brow furrowing, Dream clears his throat, craving a glass of water. His voice is hoarse. “…Nightmare?”

Nightmare shifts, hand lowering. “Yeah.” His brother relaxes a bit, still watching him.

Something drips off his fingers.

Goop the same colour as the goop that covers his brother covers his hands. It’s slimy and gross and the minute he notices, he wants to wipe it off, but it feels awkward and inconsiderate of him to do that in front of his brother.

Dream glances around, avoiding looking at him. Shame begins to heat his face and he internally sighs. Of course. He just had to get this way in front of Nightmare. This is like, the worst possible thing. But it’s just his luck. And now he’s left here afterward, wanting nothing more than to teleport straight home and sleep the next week away.

But doesn’t he owe it to Nighty for an explanation?

“Sorry…” His voice cracks again, and he coughs. “I—”

His mouth continues moving, but nothing comes out.

He frowns, trying again. “I—”

“Hold that thought.”

Dream looks up as Nightmare stands, walking back inside.

Well, if he really wants to, he could teleport away now and not face the humiliation surely coming his way. Nightmare will probably return with one of his guys and then a fight will break out, taking advantage of his weakened state. He doesn’t want to fight right now, doesn’t even want to move. If he could, he would just flop over and sleep right here. Then all of the aftermath of this can be dealt with once he wakes up.

But, no, he’s a big boy, and he will face it now as he should.

He wraps his arms around his legs and buries his head in his knees. God, he’s such an idiot. No, he’s weak. He knew coming to this party with Ink would be a risk. He felt the panic at the start, the minute they arrived and people were still pouring into the big, big room, but he swallowed it back and tried to forget about it. It was only when the crowd pulled him along that he got lost in his head. Everyone he pushed in his fight to get away must be so confused, and they must’ve talked about it with their friends and now everyone was probably wondering why he was acting so weird.

Hopefully, no one noticed the terror he felt, but he has a feeling it might’ve been obvious…

This will be such a big mess to clean up. Why did his brain have to betray him like this? Why did he give in so easily? It was like he wanted to get lost, and he never wants to get lost. He always says that it’s the last time he’d ever feel like this, but there always ends up being another thing that triggers it again. He doesn’t know how to stop it besides avoiding anything he manages to clue in on, like crowds.

And yet, here he was. Here he fucking was.

A hand grabs his wrist. Dream’s head snaps up. He watches, eyes wide, as Nightmare holds his hand and runs a damp washcloth over it, cleaning it. For some reason. Why? Why would his brother come back just to clean him up?

This wasn’t his mess to deal with.

This…this, the cleaning, reminds him of patching Nightmare up under Mother. It brings the aching longing he got sleeping in branches and walking through the woods to the front of his mind. It hurts and hurts and he’s unable to shake it off.

“Are you alright?” Nightmare asks, focusing on his task.

Dream swallows. “I’m fine.”

His brother looks up, unconvinced, raising a brow.

“Really, I am,” he insists.

Nightmare’s eye flicks over his face, searching for a lie.

Dream prepares himself, resigned at explaining. The words are on the tip of his tongue, ready, when—

“Okay.”

“Huh?”

“Okay.” Nightmare goes back to cleaning. He’s ruing a perfectly good washcloth just for Dream. He doesn’t know how to feel. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

The words feel foreign to him. “Oh…Thanks.”

Nightmare hums.

Odd.

Dream’s not used to being told he doesn’t have to talk about things if he doesn’t want to. The villagers always wanted to make sure he was happy, asking him again and again if he was and flocking to make him feel better if he said he wasn’t. Even now, people prefer to know everything about his job. Most of the conversations he has with people besides Blue or Ink or a few others are one-sided questions about himself.

He's relieved that Nightmare is giving him a choice. He wants to stay silent and let them both forget this ever existed. If they can, that is. Still. He wants to keep any of what he was thinking about to himself, as much as he can. His brother is still his enemy, after all, and giving away all his vulnerabilities will only result in more difficult battles.

He doesn’t want to say anything, and yet he does.

For some reason, having a choice makes him want to tell Nightmare something even more. “I don’t like crowds. Specifically, not, um…big ones. Or loud ones. Or big loud crowds crammed in a small room. Whenever I’m in one for a long time, it…” He swallows again, glancing up and catching Nightmare’s eye. “It brings back bad memories,” he whispers, feeling childish that he’s avoiding saying anything specific.

Nightmare watches him for a moment. “Okay.”

His face is expertly blank. He can’t tell what his brother is feeling.

“I apologize that you had to deal with this.” Dream sighs. “I usually handle it.” He chuckles, tired. “It’s stupid, really.”

Nightmare still doesn’t say anything. Still blank. He’s finished with his task, setting the washcloth aside so he can fiddle with his fingers.

Dream starts, “I—”

“I don’t like apples.”

He blinks, forgetting what he was going to say. “…What?”

“I don’t. Brings back some bad memories. So, I don’t buy any or eat any. And that’s fine. I’m sure my boys know my dislike of them, too, ‘cause they never bring any home when they go shopping.” Nightmare pauses. “They may not…understand, exactly, but they don’t need to. They’re my friends. They accept it and live with it.” He looks right at Dream. “We all do.”

Dream blinks, looking at his hands. There wasn’t a speck left on them. Even all the dirt from the week, the build-up of grime he hadn’t had the energy to wash off, it was all gone. It felt strange to see the white bones underneath, marred by scratches as they were. He clenches them and opens them, admiring them.

Nightmare wasn’t talking about himself anymore. In his own, roundabout way, he was offering some advice that Dream really needs to hear. Stuff he has told others to do—trust those around you because the fact they were still there meant they cared far more than you realized. Friends lean on each other; no friendship is one-sided. Communicate, and you’ll have a better relationship. Whenever he had given the advice, he always felt he was lying, spouting facts he didn’t know were true. His brother seems to say it with such belief, and he probably does because he's learned all of it himself.

While Dream was stuck in stone, Nightmare was growing and moving on. He already knew this but it still surprises and pains him when he sees what that really means firsthand.

And yet…for all of his moving on, his brother still helped him today.

His brother could’ve just left him to his panic attack, let him make a fool of himself in front of everyone. Let rumors spread across the multiverse about him, watch his reputation and others’ trust in him crumble. Let him be weak. That was his goal, right? Beat him and give him a taste of what was owed to him, a sliver of what happened to his brother all those years ago? Why help his enemy out of a vulnerable spot, why not take advantage?

Dream wants to say it’s because, despite everything, they were still brothers, and that took priority over anything else.

With a new surge of confidence, Dream clenches his fists. “Right…Night, I—” But when he looks up, Nightmare is gone. He falters, looking around the empty garden as if his brother was simply hiding from him, but he knows he is gone.

He doesn’t sense him in the AU anymore.

Sighing, he stands on shaky legs. He’s disappointed, yes, but not surprised. He’ll just have to tell him another day how sorry he was about what happened, how much he misses him. Ask if he feels the same way. Ask if he wants to be brothers again in more than just title. Maybe, just maybe, Night’ll listen to him and maybe he’ll even say he wants to as well.

For now, though, Dream steels his resolve and leaves.

He’ll explain to Ink in the morning that he doesn’t really like big crowds, parties included.

[darkfictionjude]

Etymology nonnie here!

The real one this time. Funnily enough. Never expected to get an impersonator. By the way, I'm not mad, I found it funny, I understand the want of saying my catchphrase... But I would appreciate it not happening again. It doesn't upset, because I can easily fix any attempt of serious impersonation since Jude already knows my real blog and I can stop being an anon, but it's the principle of the matter.

In any case, I wanted to write something during those last days, but unfortunately I didn't have access to internet or electricity for most of those days (nothing serious happened to me and my house, but the rain and wind did have some effect on electricity and the internet services). I got to play the Hollywood IF demo just today. And I didn't get to comment about EC even though I played it. But that's it's what I'm going to do now. My comments on the other demo will have to wait for another ask.

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I find very interesting the way you wrote the Prologue of EC. It made itself immediately distinct from the Prologue of WWC. Not only by having two different storylines that are connected but happening at the different chronological locations, but also by the way they are narrated. But what I understood was the past using third person, and what it's the present (or future) using second person. Although I would have appreciated having something that distinguishes both time period above each section, I think it was clever to have the different person (third or second) as the way to distinguish them, since it does allow to have some mystery that otherwise may be lost.

I also appreciate it's pacing. It's very fast, and it seems appropriate for a crime thriller. Even more so with the cliffhanger (and plot twist? I'm not sure if to call it that, since it's more of a plot twist for people who were speculating here on the blog rather than a twist that it's part of the Prologue structure; meaning that we were under the idea of MC being a normal person and then being confronted with them being a murderer and being actively hunted, but I digress). It really is an effective strategy to create anticipation. So much so I'm sure many of us wanted to be able to continue very badly to get answers.

Now, I did mention the sections with Luce were either the present or the future. And this was on purpose. Why? Well, the thing is, the text never makes it explicitly clear, but I'm under the impression the Prologue cannot be something that happens before most of the events you plan to write. That means, then, that the entire IF is going to be an analepsis, in which we get to a specific point from the past till the scene at the end of the Prologue. The question being if it's going to be in medias res or in ultimas res. I do believe the former makes more sense, mostly because it would be a weird thing for an IF to have such a defined ending point from the very beginning, especially given we have two main routes that are entirely different.

Now, I may be entirely wrong about this, and the Prologue may actually be happening in present time to the entirety of the story. That is, the story begins right after the Prologue. This also seems possible. The reason I don't believe this is because it would mean:

1. The person who shoots at Luce is either Dante, or a character we don't know as of yet.

2. If it's Dante, then we get to the kidnapping plot immediately. But, the thing is, while Dante is insane, I don't see why would he do this unless Luce killed someone important to him (in which case the romance is... Well, harder to understand I guess); but even then, just because of Luce's identity, Dante would be not just crazy but stupid to hunt Luce. It means getting into war with Luce's family. Then again, so does the kidnapping if Luce's family figures out Dante is responsible. It's a very messy situation.

3. If it's not Dante, then it's a character we don't know. But given the plot involving kidnapping, then I can only imagine Dante saves us from whoever is hunting us, and then proceeds to kidnap us. Which is insane too, but would be so insanely funny.

Yet, the idea of the Prologue being in the middle does appeal to me more. I may be wrong, I do recognize, but it really does feel like it's the case in my mind. Mostly, because it would serve as a point in which Luce has no choice but to be involved with the crime world one way or another. But, having said that, it's a very weird way of beginning a crime story from a character standpoint if it's just the start of the story. Since we don't get how Luce got there, and flashbacks would be very necessary. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. If Fallen Hero can do that, then why not Excellent Cadavers too?

Then, of course, EC can go the Fallout New Vegas route. In which we survive a shot that should have killed us, and we have a possible revenge route from the rest of the story. But only as a catalyst.

Overall, I must admit I'm intrigued.

Also, some things that are not that related to what I've been discussing here:

1. As for RO's, I decided to go for Lazlo. Dante is fun, I just don't see myself being seduced by him. I prefer RO's with an elegant mask hiding their unhinged and wild behaviors and desires (like Imre), more than straightforward insane people. But it can be hot, not going to lie. Yet, I prefer Lazlo because the romance is just angst made plot. It's a forbidden romance in almost every angle. And one in which both probably don't want to fall in love with the other. There is resentment, unwarranted or not. There is envy. There is the incest tones neither may recognize but Antonio forces into the relationship. Mostly, Antonio's shadow haunting any hope for this relationship is so exciting to me. And it gets worse because my MC is male, so add homosexuality into the the reasons why this romance is forbidden.

2. I saw people speaking about becoming a doctor in college. And, in all honesty, I hadn't considered the possibility. I was imagining Luce becoming a lawyer, so he could defend the family in court. And maybe eventually becoming a politician (a senator, perhaps), so the family gets their claws inside the government. Yet, the idea of a doctor Luce is fun. And it would allow for a tending wounds scene with the ROs to feel even better. So now I'm obsessed with Luce studying medicine.

3. I'm not surprised, just disappointed, by the reaction against Carmen. I understand not liking open relationships of sleeping around, but there is no point on insulting someone for it. Especially when she does worse things than that, and it's meant to be consensual between Carmen and Luce anyway, from what I gathered. I do appreciate having non traditional female RO's, even if I'm never going to romance them (well, never is a strong word, but it's unlikely I'll do it since I'm gay, lol). It makes the story more interesting to read and play. Furthermore, it was evident since Carmen was introduced she wasn't going to be a traditional female character. She is a woman who knows what she wants, and won't be stopped in getting it. Luce is someone who can join her, or not (is Dante the one who won't let Luce go, if anything).

Finally, I don't think I have any real questions to ask that cannot be answered by waiting for the release of chapter 1 (or is going to be called an episode too like in WWC? Maybe that's the question I have). I'm just excited from what it's going to come.

Apart from your usual identifiers no one else writes me such in depth messages you could never be confused with anyone else 😭

In reference to you saying there isn’t an identifier to when the timeline changes, I swear that at the top of each page there’s the date, the past of 1937 and 1977.

Yeah like I was like “so the problem with Carmen isn’t that she kills people and has committed all sorts of crimes but that she likes sex and is honest with Luce about her wishes?” PRIORITIES but yeah I feel if you’ve been here for a while you should understand what type of women I write 😅

No it’s not en episode it’s a chapter, WWC just always felt more episodic to me. EC feels like a novel almost

[aussiepineapple1st]

Never Fly Near Giant Mold Monsters

This story is set in Resident Evil 8 Village. An AU of Chris calling on Leon's help with the Megamycete.

Ship: Chreon Words: 2,938 Contains: blood, death, angst, slight fluff.

Chris had been sitting in a tent his team set up in the forest, holding his phone in both hands. He was contemplating on calling Leon, they hadn't spoken in two weeks and the first thing he was going to ask was for help. Chris knew he would be here as soon as he could, but this was big. He had Ethan somewhere in Heisenberg's domain, his men keeping track of his whereabouts while they all worked behind the scenes to try and find Miranda. She had kept slipping out of his sight for 3 years now, but now that she had basically told them where she was, it was just a matter of searching every inch until they find her.

Chris hadn't slept in what felt like weeks, feeling like he had let the Winters family down after trying to keep them safe. Damn it! Why did everything he do blow up in his face lately? Rose had been taken, Mia was missing, and Ethan was being beaten to a bloody pulp by every creature in this god forsaken village.

He looks down to his phone one more time, he can't do this alone, he needed help, and who else than Leon? Pressing the call button on Leon's name he places the phone up to his right ear, praying to whatever had been keeping him and Leon alive for all these years, that he wasn't on another vacation he would be pulling him from. "Chris? It's been a while." Leon answered almost soon after the call had come through. "Leon." Chris seemed to pause, long enough for Leon to pick up on something. "Chris? What's wrong? Has something happened?" There was concern in the slightly younger man's voice over the phone after hearing the long silence. "Well. Yes and no? You know the Mold I found a few years ago in Louisiana?" "Yeah? Don't tell me you found more of it?"

"I have, and this seems to be the rout cause of it. I ran into a few problems with the Winters family, again. Mia had been replaced by a woman by the name of Mother Miranda." Chris explained the whole situation to Leon. Everything from him shooting her in the safe house, to Rose being kidnapped and now Ethan gone rogue in the village. "You didn't think to tell me any of this? How long have you been after Miranda?" Leon asks, annoyance in his voice. "3 years..." Chris said squinting as he waits for the earful from the other side of the line. "3... 3 YEARS?!" There was the sound of shuffling from Leons end of the line and Chris could only imagine he had been sitting down, now standing on his feet, probably pacing. "Right.. Where are you? I'll grab a small team and come to you."

"Romania, I'll send you my coordinates now." Chris says pulling the phone from his ear and sending through his exact location. Putting his phone back up to his ear, Chris waits for confirmation.

"Got it. I'll be there as soon as possible, I'm currently in Germany. Just took care of some BOWs." Leon explains almost about to hang up.

"And Leon?" Chris said quickly sensing he was about to end the conversation.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks, I really need your help." He said smiling softly.

"Don't mention it, I'll be there as soon as I can. Stay safe." Leon then hung up so he could make his way to Chris as fast as possible. Cursing under his breath as he gets to calling the few people left from his current mission.

"Love you too." Chris said to the phone with a sigh.

-----*Several Hours Later*-----

Chris was staring at the Village from the top of a hill his unit had set up camp on. Arms crossed over his chest sighing heavily, his breath visible in the freezing air. Pulling out a cigarette, Chris lights it, sucking on the butt he felt a slight amount of tension leaving his shoulders. A glint on his left hand catching his eye as he looks to the golden wedding band on his ring finger, giving it a small twist on his finger his ears perk up. That was the sound of a chopper, Leon was here. Taking one more suck of the cigarette he drops it on the snow covered ground and stomps it out. Looking out over the towards the mountains behind the castle, a black helicopter had appeared. Flying over the center of the village, Chris could feel his tense shoulders relaxing.

"That your backup, Alpha?" Speaks a male's voice fully kitted out, ready for whatever would be coming, they had already lost two people in their group by being here, he didn't want to be next. Chris only gives a nod as something below the helicopter caught his eye, reaching for the sniper rifle the man beside him was holding, he looks through the scope. His eyes widen as he saw a large arm of the mold bursting up from the ground. Chris reaches for his phone, handing the rifle back to his man as he calls Leon.

"I'm just over the village, can't you wait for me to land?" Leon quips, a smile on his face.

"Ascend! NOW!"

"What?" Leon didn't have time to think before the black mold had wiped the entire tail of the Helicopter away from the body. "Shit!" Was all Chris heard before the call was hung up. Chris watched in horror as the helicopter started to spin out of control, he notes which direction it was heading and runs as fast as he could calling anyone who gets to the car to come with him. Two of the men in his group were ready and hopped in the vehicle, Chris took off in the direction the helicopter had just crash landed. Driving over small trees and leaping off a few small cliffs they made their way to a small clearing, Leon had managed to direct the vehicle there. Better to be in an opening rather than in a bunch of trees. Chris puts the vehicle in park and runs out of the car towards the wrecked helicopter. A body was on the ground, but it wasn't Leon. Directing one of the two men to check on him, Chris saw Leon's figure lying on the ground of the passenger section of the vehicle. Fire engulfing the entrance as on of the others had been impaled by metal, already a charcoaled corpse.

Chris rips off his large black coat and runs over to the wreckage, leaping through the fire and landing next to Leon's body. He picks him up gently in his arms standing to his feet. Hopping slightly on his heals as he exhales, psyching himself up to run back through the flames. There was a hissing sound coming from the back of the helicopter giving him the signal that there was a tank about to explode. He leaps through the fire just as the explosion pushes him further through the air, wrapping an arm around Leon's torso, a hand cradling his head into Chris' chest as he hits the ground. Rolling in the snow Chris grunts as he was laying on Leon's limp body, he looks back at the helicopter. Moving to his knees Chris hooks his hands under Leon's arms, dragging him back away from the helicopter. Just in case it decided to blow up again. "Leon!" He calls trying to wake the unconscious male in his arms. Gently resting him down in the snow Chris kneels on Leon's right side. A gloved hand resting on Leon's chest as he lay in the snow. Nose and mouth bleeding, a large gash on his left shoulder and another unknown injury causing his navy blue, button up to be soaked in blood on the right side of his lower abdomen.

Chris looks over his husband's body, laying there in front of him in the snow. "Leon! Damn it! Don't do this to me!" He said cupping Leon's face in his gloved hands. One of his other men that had joined him here, walks over holding out Chris' black coat he had ripped off his body before leaping into the flames. Taking the coat with a look of thank you to his man, Chris placed it under Leon's head. He then pulls up Leon's shirt, revealing a large, bleeding gash to his lower abdomen. "First aid kit, STAT!" He looked up to the man still standing beside Leon. Nodding the man runs to the car grabbing a second kit and hurries back to Chris. Kneeling down the man pulls out some supplies. Chris had done a quick examination of the wound while waiting, concluding it wasn't deep enough to have done any serious damage. Maybe the muscle was broken through, but not any deeper.

Chris immediately grabs the alcohol wipes and cleans away as much blood as he could, doing a quick swab inside the wound. He then begins to sew up the wound, once finished he sits Leon up with the help of the other man and wraps a bandage around his lower abdomen as well as his shoulder. Chris had done the same treatment there. Relaxing slightly, Chris looks over to the second man of his group, who was walking over to the three of them. "He's gone, sir." He addresses. Kneeling down beside his teammate. "Damn it!" Chris punches the ground, his head hanging low. Looking to Leon still unconscious in the snow he couldn't help but feel tears threatening to leave his eyes. He had put them all at risk, he shouldn't have called.

"Sir... Alpha." One of the men called trying to get Chris' attention. He then lifts his head to look up at Men. "We should get him back to camp."

"Right." Chris replied. Taking the coat from under Leon's head, he placed it over his body and scoops him up in his arms once again. Walking to the large vehicle he had driven here in a hurry, Chris slides into the back, Leon's head on his lap as the other two sit in the front. "We'll get him to camp and he'll be fine." The man sitting in the driver's seat assured his boss as he started to drive back.

Once at camp he climbs out, pulling Leon into his arms once again, walking him into the medical tent where two of his team lay under white sheets. He averts his gaze and places Leon down on one of the cots, pulling up a stool beside him. The medic of the group takes a look at Chris' handy work, giving a nod and fixes Leon up a little more while checking on his vitals. She places a hand on Chris' shoulder to comfort him. "You did good, Alpha. Quick thinking on your part, the wound on his stomach hasn't done too much damage. He'll live." She assured, placing an oxygen mask over Leon's nose and mouth to help combat the smoke in his lungs. I'll come back and check on him in a moment. I'll give you two some time alone. And Alpha? Don't beat yourself up. You didn't know this would happen." She said patting Chris' back before she leaves. Chris was now in there alone with Leon, he reaches up to take his hand but stops when he sees the blood soaked into his gloves. Ripping them off he throws them to the ground and wipes his hands on his pants, trying to remove any blood that had soaked through.

Now taking Leon's hand from under his coat still on his husband's body, Chris held it tight, his thumb caressing the back of Leon's left hand. Running his fingers over the bloodied wedding band on Leon's finger, he couldn't help but break down. Tears streaming down his cheeks as he brought his head down to Leon's hand, holding the back of it to his own forehead as he cried silently.

-----*20 Minutes Later*-----

Chris had profusely apologised to Leon as he cried, but after a while he had gathered himself and made is way out of the medical tent. Calling his team together around the map. They had started to make a plan as he couldn't just sit around, there was Mold bursting out of the ground everywhere in the village, they needed to make a move. His team gets a visual on as much of the Mold as they could from their vantage point and makes a note of it on the map. "Alpha." Called a female voice, she had Chris turning his head as soon as he heard her speak. "Someone would like to see you." She smiled.

Her smile caused a sharp pain in Chris' gut, pure relief knowing Leon was alright and now awake. Rushing past her and to the Medical tent, Chris bursts through the material doors, immediately looking in the direction of Leon's cot he had placed him on. Bright blue eyes were staring at him when he had entered, the oxygen mask off his face and now replaced with a tube, tucked behind his ears to keep it in place under her nose. Chris jogs over to Leon and falls to his knees, placing his hands on either side of his face, kissing him. A long, wet kiss as Chris had already started crying once seeing his husband looking back at him. "I thought I lost you." Chris sobbed as he pulls away from the kiss and wraps his arms around Leon.

Leon only had the strength to gently pat a hand on Chris' back. "Okay..." He says weakly. Chris could hear how little strength his husband had and pulls back to give him some space, his normally hardened look that his squad knew, was now full of worry. He knew just because Leon was awake, doesn't mean he couldn't pass away at any moment due to any underlining injury, infection or still even blood loss. Leon looked around seeing the other cots empty, looking up to Chris. "My men? Did they make it?" Leon asked, having a feeling he already knew the answer. Chris just looks down and shakes his head. "Damn it!" Leon replied, resting his right hand over his eyes. Chris could tell he was trying to be strong but his bottom lip was quivering. "I shouldn't have called. I'm so, so sorry." Chris said tightening his grip on Leon's left hand. "I've caused so much pain, my squad, the Winters, you... I don't know why I'm still doing this." A gentle hand was placed on Chris' arm, causing his head to lift and look to Leon who was giving him a frown. "Don't say that, we have both lost so many men in our time. But you still keep fighting. If it weren't for you, all of this would still be getting worse. And in our line of work that just means more of a clean up." Chris could only scoff a small laugh at the thought of more of this Mold. He had found where it originated from, and from what he had experienced with this stuff, if you take out the source, the rest will crumble.

"Fine... You're right. It's just so much." Chris said, his shoulders lowering as if the weight of everything had become too heavy. Leon reaches up to place his right hand on Chris' cheek.

"I know. But we have to keep going. For the sake of this planet and the living things on it."

"Okay, now you're showing just how much blood you've lost." Chris teased, taking the hand on his cheek and pulling it to his lips, pressing a kiss on Leon's knuckles.

"You should probably get going.. It sounds like a lot is happening out there." Leon stated, not wanting to ruin the moment. But there was a job to be done.

Chris nods. "Yeah.. I'll be back soon. You get some rest and I'll see you when this is all over." He says moving to his feet, but leaning over Leon to press one more kiss to his lips before standing up. Leon held onto his husband's hand for as long as possible before he was out of reach. Leon's hand reaching out to Chris as he walks out of the tent.

"You come back to me Redfield, you hear?!" Leon called out hoping Chris would have heard him.

-----*2 hours Later*-----

Chris runs back to the chopper his squad had waiting for him, baby in his arms as he hands Rose to her mother.

"Where is Ethan?"

"Take us up we have to get out of here, NOW!" Chris says walking passed three bodies under white cloths. The Chopper takes to the skies and hurries out of the village as Chris stares at the three bodies. He feels his heart clench and felt a stabbing in his gut. There was the explosion knowing Ethan was now gone.

"Chris? What was that? Where is my husband?!"

"He's gone!" Chris says slamming his fist on the wall. He then walks over to the body placed on the seats and pulls back the cloth, revealing the pale, peace face of his husband. Falling to his knees Chris stares as Leon's face, reaching down to pull his left hand free from the cloth and holds his hand.

Mia saw the wedding rings on both their hands and placed a hand to her mouth, He was feeling the exact same loss she was right at this very moment. Standing up she walks over to place a hand on Chris' shoulder. "I tried..." Chris sobbed. "I tried to save everyone."

Tag List🏷️: @phoenix666stuff @c1a1r3r3df1e1d

[its-creed]

how do i do this , is this thing even on ? it's been a whileeeeee since i've been writing online so please bear with me! stumbling back into the scene i am sun (she/her/yours) / 25+, some of you guys may be familiar with my previous iterations of this baekhyun muse haha so if he seems familiar - he probably is!

i'm excited to introduce my evil old man credence han - commonly known as reed or professor han to those acquainted with him.

full disclosure: i am terrible at plotting in a quick manner (and i mean this with the entirety of my one brain cell) so if you would like a random starter please see below for details (cap at three for now 🥹)! and if you don't mind slow pacing and would still like to plot based on something below or in one of the ideas i have at the end, please give this a like and i will slide into your dms asap!

how does an evil villain get around without being discovered for over ten plus years? with the power of negation persuasion of course!

reed wasn’t aware of his primary ability when it first manifested because well - how the hell do you tell that you can turn off other people’s powers? goes for first part of his teen years thinking that his ability has to do with persuasion because he finds at a young age that people sometimes do whatever he tells them to do? he rides on that high for a long time until one day when someone somehow figures out what happened and tries to get revenge. too bad for him, it’s another metahuman he managed to piss off and he’s about to get his ass fried when ? everything is still in tact and suddenly ? the other guy seems more confused and fearful of what’s going on.

the shock wears off pretty quickly and lucky for reed his ass doesn’t get fried - but it still gets beat after the metahuman goes on a rampage and rages against reed asking what he did to his powers. it’s after that moment that reed connects the dots and realizes his persuasion abilities had been minor this entire time since he had never seemed to be able to actually develop it.

discovering that he can negate others powers is a game changer for reed. he starts using it for morally lesser means realizing he’s able to get away with more. it starts from setting people up for things that get them caught red handed, to being given information, and then selling that information once he finds out just how valuable the things he’s discovers can be.

eventually his endeavors lead him to a point of no return. he infiltrates the aeternal base back home acting as his twin brother and pulls the biggest heist he’s ever done yet. he finds government secrets that he sells to someone abroad in south korea before escaping after making sure that they believe his brother is the true culprit.

after this feat his brother had taken something of extreme valuable to him which started a chase. reed uses his connection of his past buyer to secure a private space at the silverline apartments while he tries to track his brother down.

reed has been using the cover of a new professor for metahuman biomedical studies at nsnu during his time abroad. it offers him both network connections to the han pharmaceuticals and and a straight gateway into the university to continue his ulterior motives.

i think that covers the what and why just to give it to you guys fast and short! so per my inability to plot quickly, i will offer three random starters if you're interested in having an interaction with reed, drop an emoji and aaaa [positive, neutral, negative, unknown] to choose a dynamic you'd be interested in and i will work that out however i can! fair warning, reed is not exactly a people lover but he keeps up a strong front so positive might be a fake positive for face purposes,,,

plots and connections

reed has a habit of walking around with his negation on - well, keeping it on in general. you're trynna get something done and?? why aren't? your powers working???

you catch reed in the subtle act of persuading one of the receptionist's at the front desk to erase the latest residential complaint against him. do you a) mind your own business, b) confront him, c) play dumb, or d) all the above plus receive an underlying threat from reed?

bad influencer - if you want your muse to do something bad or something they would never have the guts to try, reed is your go-to. or maybe there's something you really need to do like studying and procrastination has been your worst nightmare. reed is less inclined to help you because that's lame. and if you're one of his students? tough luck.

reed was always the champion when it came to playing hide and seek as kids. life detection comes in handy for that. reed finds your muse somewhere they shouldn't be or maybe your muse is trapped and reed happens to be the only person who's come by within the last 3 hours.

students from nsnu?

someone who seems to have the same laundry schedule

someone complaining about reed's negation affecting them

enemies or victims? when i say he's evil - i like legitimately mean it. he's morally corrupt and just does well to hide crap like an actual sociopath

( he's not who he seems )