#and while i personally objectively dont think she is
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steverougers · 2 years ago
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i feel like its super important that people know i AM biased when it comes to rdr2 and who the rat is!!!! i fully believe that the rat was micah and if rockstar came out tomorrow and was like hey guys the rat is micah we didnt lie in the game!! i would be like gross stinky man ew worst person ever!! but if they came out and they were like jk we lied in the game the rat is abigail i would be like gaslight gatekeep girlboss!! she did was she thought would save her family and i cant fault her for that!! she tried her best!!!
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grabby-raccoon-hands · 2 years ago
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I am so normal about her (<- lying)
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sanguinewolves · 8 months ago
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im so tired
#its exhausting living here#im the bad guy in every situation#every time i dont accomodate her stupid bullshit whims im evil and creating conflict#dean you arent allowed to get lunch for yourself bc she wants to do a baking project &youre too Disgusting to be in the same room as her fo#*food#dean you arent allowed to listen to music out loud in your room but she can play her music in the living room while you have a migraine#dean you have to ask her what food she wants from town bc she doesnt feel like texting mom herself#dean you have to stop laughing because she thinks your laugh is annoying#dean you arent allowed to eat the bread that was bought for you because she decided she wanted it#dean you arent allowed to wear the one piece of mens clothing youve ever gotten to buy apart from plaid shirts bc she thinks youre too fat#dean you arent allowed to correct her when she says things about you that are objectively untrue#dean she wants to hang out in the living room go back to your room so she doesnt have to be around you#dean she wants a book for english class you have to give her one of yours#dean you arent allowed to be angry at her for ripping the cover off one of your favorite books & nrver apologizing that was years ago#dean you arent allowed to make plans with your friends this weekend bc she might want to hang out w her friends & wants to keep moms schedul#schedule open to drive her#dean you arent allowed to eat until she serves herself#dean if youre making food & she refuses to eat bc you were in the kitchen thats your fault#dean how dare you say her hair looks like sam winchesters#dean you cant be angry when she calls you fat & ugly & disgusting & tells you to kill yourself you shouldnt let it get to you#sui mention#dean you cant get new pants bc she wants to buy this dress that she’ll never wear#dean its not a big deal when she misgenders you she waa just joking#dean shes not ableist bc youre the only autistic person she thinks is faking it for attention#im just so goddamn tired
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br1ghtestlight · 2 months ago
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love when a character gets Worse while everyone else is getting better. i want one of my characters to get worse but idk most of them already start at such a bad place to begin with lmao. my original character outline for bubblegum was kind of similar tho
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago
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...
#its crazy how much easier it is to do things when youre not completely miserable lol#this past week has been weird bc ive felt really really good and like normal in a way thats kinds unfathomable#im hoping its the medication but my mood was already on an upward tilt and i was told it would take like 6 weeks for the meds to work#property but like ive been sleeping way more than usual. and by that i literally just mean 8hrs a night lol which is weird for me#like that never ever ever happens multiple days in a row. so idk. when i feel better it makes the 0cd way easier to manage as well#and im just generally not as anxious. on the more worrisome side i kinda just give less of a fuck so like i have an exam im not ready for#Tuesday and im just kinda like hm fuck that lol. ill go thru lil fluctuations of having a lot of energy too#like: i could run around in circles rn. i dont have to but i could. like yesterday i was out with friends and i was like bouncing up and#down while standing and rocking from side to side while sitting. which i kinda do anyway while in crowds but it was more to expend energy#last night i also got like 5hrs of sleep. so like maaaaybe ive been on the bleeding edge of mood elevation but for the most part it just#feels good and not destructive. like if i felt like this all the time that would b fantastic. its like oh so this is y ppl dont long to b#put out of their misery lol. depression? who? i dont kno her. sounds fake. but as soon as i fucking say that ill b fucking slapped back#down to earth. ugh. annoying. no emotional object permanence. i hope its the meds. if this is the person i am under layers of misery then#that is fucking so insane. we shall see. im curious to hear what the psychiatrist thinks of my brain when i follow up with her#i gave her my full dys1exia assessment which gives a pretty good picture of how my head functions. oh fuck i bet i would do waaaayyy better#on thise test if i took it in this state of mind. but anyway she has that on top of like 3 assessment sheets i filled out#dispite everything i still want someone to categorize me into a discreet box. tell me doc. am i really bip0lar? really really?#ur sure??? like 1000% sure bc my brain wont let me accept that unless its beyond a reasonable doubt. i just doesn't seem that serious.#i mean. it is but like ya kno. its not that bad. ay. this glob of mush behind my eyes runs me in circles#but for now thats ok bc i feel like i could run up a mountain or punch someone in the face lol#unrelated
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reblog-house · 6 months ago
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My green flag is that if I don't like someone or someone bothers me... I don't remember them. I genuinely don't. I don't remember the name of half my school classmates and not a single one that actively bothered me (minus one I eventually became short-lived friends with). I could probably figure it out but there, it's gone. And even if I do remember them, I don't know them¹ anymore so why feel resentment lol.
¹ Either I don't know their current personality or I simply never interact w them now so I don't care if they still have the same personality. I'm just. Not affected by them, so why care either way.
I may dislike or get annoyed by someone, but out of sight, out of mind.
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lowpolypaws · 9 months ago
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I really like how himeno looks like absolute shit in this part right before she gets slapped by one of her old partner's girlfriend. I like how her hair hangs over her face and how much her hair in general looks really grown out and unkept. It's a scene I like because of like how awful and different she looks compared to how she acts in the present day in the series. anyways one of the things I like about rewatching chainsaw man is getting a better idea of how unstable and unhappy himeno is in general and how many different sides of her we see in the relatively small amount of time we spend with her
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schizopositivity · 1 year ago
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Hearing people throw around the words "delusional" and "delulu" so often when they clearly don't know what it means is so silly to me at this point, but also a little frustrating.
Like I heard someone in a video say "she's the worst type of delulu, where she actually is in a different reality" while describing someone being cocky and overconfident.
As a reminder, delusional means someone is holding a belief or altered reality that is persistently held despite evidence or agreement to the contrary, generally in reference to a mental disorder. Delusions are typically beliefs that exist outside of objective or common reality (so not something subjective like "this art is good"). It is often unshakeable, people can't be talked out of their strongly held belief even if it is completely nonsensical. They typically cause a disturbance to your life, unlike a spirituality or religion that you enjoy.
So someone saying "I'm the most attractive and most talented person in this room" might be annoying, but it is that person's subjective belief. It's your subjective belief that they are not, but neither is right or wrong because it is subjective.
Having a crush on a celebrity and wanting to marry them and imagining that happening is a conscious choice, it's a daydream. Meanwhile delusions are not conscious choices, it is a symptom a person has whether they want it or not.
It's important to uphold the true meaning of this word, because it describes a mental condition that impacts many people. Having the words definition change by making it mean other things does harm us. If we want to open up to a friend about a serious mental problem in our lives by saying "I have delusions", that person should know the gravity of that, and not think it's some fun quirky personality trait that everyone has.
Also the way people misuse the word tends to be in a negative or insulting way, aimed at the delusional person. But delusions dont indicate anything about the delusional persons personality and morals. The delusions are caused by a mental health problem and not chosen by the person. This is important to remember when people have strange, mean, self centered, taboo, or scary delusions, it doesn't mean that a person wants to believe that, they can't control it.
So please try and use the words "delusion" and "delusional" correctly, don't give it a cute trendy nickname like "delulu". And try and educate the people around you about the actual meaning of these words, and the impact of misusing them.
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tinylittlebab · 2 years ago
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:/
#ugh. i was supposed to go to the store an hour ago#my sister was out so i cant get there and im v upset cause i couldve been skipping around the garage while they were gone#im glad the main thing i have been coping with for the past 7 years is daydreaming and that i skip around while doing it#exercise tends to be difficult bc im hypermobile and a lit of excercise tends to make it worse which is really really bad#like. no amount of control and feeling good vc im starving myself is worth making my joints even worse#one of my shoulders already likes to partially dislocate just whenever and like. it hurts and sucks and i dont wanna make that worse#well. ill have lots of time to skip around soon bc the person with the car is gna be gone for a few days so the garage will be empty :D#i can use it at night when they are here but its less fun and i burn less calories so i prefer when its empty#i usually use it while both ppl are at work but they dont work friday and saturday so it tends to be bleh those days#idk. im glad that my favorite thing to do also burn calories bc i enjoy it unrelated to my ed so its less stressful#i was debating not eating till 7pm but i have such a headache ao i think ill eat some fruit. idk. my sister knows im relapsing so she might#suggest we eat something while were out. idk how she does it but she usually convinces me to which is good i guess#im not happy abt it bc i wanna starve myself but that is objectively a bad thing to be doing and even if im not happy abt it its still good#when i eat stuff. id be more fussed abt it if i knew how much i weighed but i dont have a scale#part of me is like. i dont wanna restrict until i have a scale bc then i cant watch the numbers go down#i know for a lot of people qhen they first start dieting they see quick drop and then it goes very slow and i wanna see that#im just. i dont even care much abt being skinny rn im mostly looking for the nice feeling i get when i watch the number drop#idk. maybe my sister will catch on to how bleh im doing today and suggest i buy something yummy but hopefully not although i do appreciate#when she does that. it feels nice to have someone care abt you
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malwaredykes · 6 months ago
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well. here she is. miss Leigh Stasik.
trans woman. stubborn, incorrigible, eccentric. communist; she has leftist in-fighting with herself on the regular. a cannibal; she has no moral qualms about this, and its both a bit of a spiritual thing and a bit of a pragmatic thing. medic (not a doctor. no medical license). she knows for sure she had some kind of significant personality change from being shot in the head, but she doesn't remember what she was like exactly before it happened, it all became this kind of distant memory soup. shes originally from west new cali, but she grew very attached to the mojave. and has a lot of contempt for the ncr. She Will Serve Crack Before She Serves This Country. thank god the army discriminates against transsexuals etc. zero tolerance for the legion, obviously.
she firmly believes she is not nice, or kind, or compassionate, but instead her actions and her general sense of justice stem from her simply doing whats the most logical and objectively beneficial. it may be true to some extent, but she might also have a wee bit of ocd of the "i am a horrible person whos at all times like 2 seconds away from committing atrocities" variety.
shes a SCIENTIST. unofficially. she doesnt have a degree nor a chosen field of study. she makes her own hrt and other mysterious concoctions, including designer chems. which she claims she ingests injects etc not for recreational purposes, but to Enhance Her Powers And Possibilities. she reads old world books about psychology so she can manipulate people better. and makes weird contraptions and doohickeys while high. shes a HACKER of course and hacks terminals and systems for fun and just to see if she can.
her stats are out there due to implants and intense training, originally they were rather average. in-game she wears combat armor mk 2, but i see her having spruced it up like this. her main weapon is the ycs/186, the unique gauss rifle, but before that she used a modded plasma pistol. which she very much enjoyed the silly appearance of. because it was so small and with so much shit tacked on and she could just hold it in one hand like a mutated revolver like Hands up motherfucker bang bang bang lol. her melee weapon of choice is the machete gladius, but she's been training to be able to wield a thermic lance.
in my head the trajectory of her actions and the fate of the mojave that follows is different from what you can do with the game, because leigh could only go for The Secret Leftist Route Which Was Supposed To Be In The Game But We Were Robbed Of It.
boone was the first friend she made after leaving goodsprings and their relationship is particularly notable. they are Comrades, Siblings-In-Arms, Worsties (like besties but fucked up). theyve seen each other at their worst. they annoy each other on purpose. theyve had serious ideological clashes with each other and some ways in which boone perceives the world drive leigh absolutely nuts. they're ride or die for each other. theyre the kind of comfortable around each other where she'll be on the toilet and smoking a cig with the door open and talking to him, while he's naked sitting on the floor removing stitches from his leg. she's done surgery without anesthesia on him. he's projectile vomited blood on her from being poisoned by cazadores. she strongly encourages him to become a traitor to the ncr and to take part in the revolution and the formation of the new independent mojave alliance. somehow, it works on him in the end. shamefully they kinda like snuggling... boone bro come to bed man its nighty night man its beddy bye time.
shes in love with lily bowen. i havent decided yet whether she actually makes a move. but she thinks lily is sooooo dreamy. and shes right. if you dont think the enormous 203 year old blue mutant woman is dreamy thats your problem. outta her way
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celuere · 3 months ago
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Random SFW Arlecchino x wife!reader hcs that have been floating in my head for the past weeks now
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cw: fluff. There is so. much. fluff.
I‘m so serious when I tell you that this woman changed my brain chemistry.
She lets the kids braid her hair when she feels like it, for example whenever she is doing things like reading reports, doing paperwork etc.
Will ALWAYS. And I mean ALWAYS find an excuse to pop into your office/laboratory during work
„I wanted to hand you over some reports, dear“
„…Arle, we have subordinates for that.“
„…Cant a husband do her wife a favor nowadays?“
You just have to throw her a look for her to know whatever is going on in your head. You want to go out to dinner tonight? Just make eye contact with her for longer than three seconds and she is already making a reservation at your favorite restaurant.
Now if you happen to go out for dinner, she‘ll make sure to buy you a brand new dress/suit (whatever you prefer) along with some quite expensive jewelry, which of course she wants to wear at said restaurant
An absolute GONER for you. And I mean that with all my heart. She thinks you’re beautiful no matter what and lets you know it on any given occasion. You‘re changing in front of her? Gods above, she CANNOT keep her eyes off of your beautiful body, even if she wanted to. You got a new haircut? You don’t even have to tell her and she already showers you in compliments. You tried out a new clothing style? She‘d marry you all over again, even if you wore a trashbag instead of your wedding dress.
Speaking of wedding, i dont think arle would be the type of person for a big ceremony at all. It was just you. her. the pastor. and of course some of the more older children present when you vowed to each other to stay by the others side until death does you part.
She always wakes up at exactly 5:30am, something that got drilled into her from „Mother“. I think she is the type of person to completely skip breakfast, only sipping on a cup of her favorite tea while reading through whatever reports were due for today. Leaving the house at exactly 6:00am, but not before kissing you awake and placing a cup of your own favorite drink on your nightstand (she is actually your personal alarm clock)
The first time you tried to sneak some more seasoning into her food besides salt and pepper she straight up gagged. Gagged. Save to say, that you never messed with her meals ever again.
You‘re quite literally the only person who gets to pull off ANY shit with her and be alive the next morning. Burst into her office during important negotiations? Oh, what a great opportunity to mention in front of everyone that you‘re her wife. Kicking her leg underneath the table at a Fatui Meeting because you want her attention? You won’t get as much as a glare from her.
Also arguing with her would be so???? Rare??? And even then, I would hardly call it argue since Arle pretty much never looses her cool, the worst you might be getting is a sharp, cold comment from her but yet she can’t stay mad at you for longer than a few hours. But again, discussions with her would always be collected and objective imo
Do NOT take a walk through the city with her ass unless you want her to buy you literally everything you‘re eyeing for longer than 5 seconds. It‘s impossible for her to just keep her purse inside her jacket if she notices you looking that one necklace up and down for more than two times.
Literally cannot get sick is immune to most poisons because the Balemoon Bloodfire in her veins casually kills everything off that doesn’t belong into her blood circulation
Has a deathgrip on you in her sleep, it’s not even intentional but there is NO way of getting out of her embrace without waking her up
Is on the other hand a rather light sleeper, which is actually essential to her at times, you never know who might wanna take revenge on her etc., also R.I.P. to any teenager trying to sneak out past bedtime. You‘re getting caught. But waking up anytime you have to make a run for the toilet or get a glass of water in the middle of the night is rather hard on her.
Hates physical touch until it’s from you, especially when you’ve known each other since childhood. It actually calms her raging mind, so receiving a hug and a kiss from you after a long and dreadful day is the equivalent of asking her to marry you again.
Now dare I speak about Papa!Arlecchino. Your shared daughter taking a liking into insects, just like her dad so the two of them end up taking long walks through whatever forest is the nearest. Arlecchino educating her little girl on every animal they come across and OWNENNSKRLALENWN I AM SO NOT OKAY I LOVE HER SM.
I‘m gonna make a whole series out of Papa!Arlecchino JUST WATCH ME. anyways thanks for coming to my ted talk, I could talk about her and my oc 24/7😭
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kawareo · 5 months ago
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Thank you lovely people for giving me a chance to ramble more about something (this is genuine, i mean no shade)
I find it really cool how every character has a parallel with Durge! In general every single romance pairing has reasons for why i think "yeah i could see them being good together", but I love those for Durge especially since I think about Durges way too much
Gale. Prodigy, Chosen of a God(ess) with a relationship that went far past god/Chosen, with him and Mystra being 'lovers' and Durge and Bhaal being 'family'. They were also both groomed to a degree to fulfill a role and have since fallen from grace of their gods.
Lae'zel. Raised in what is essentially a cult, having her entire world fall apart when she learns the truth about Vlaakith and Orpheus (while Durge's world falls apart when they learn about who they are in act 3). Cult has harsh and merciless punishments for those that disappoint, with death and beatings for githyanki and... Well. You know what, for Durge (looking at you, deleted bad ending).
Shadowheart. Having an equivalent of an electric collar on you that her God(ess) can punish her with (for Durge, that punishment isnt so immediate but Bhaal can literally stop their heart if he wants to). Amnesia. Having to choose between leading your cult or leaving everything you thought you knew and being an outcast. Depending on what you do with Shart, they also both kill their parents.
Karlach. Having your body changed without your consent, in drastic ways that you have no control over; the engine for Karlach, lobotomy + Slayer form for Durge (slayer in a more minor way but i will say that even in evil route you dont get a say whether or not you transform the first time). They both hurt people that get close to then without meaning to. They both have someone more powerful who sees them as property. Also, ties to Gortash.
Wyll. Daddy issues! And being rejected and outcast by your Father, wanting to prove yourself that you're still worthy. They were also both given shitty fucking names by their dads. They both at some point chose between power at the cost of freedom and freedom at the cost of literally everything; Wyll when he made a deal with Mizora, Durge at multiple points through the game when it comes to Bhaal. They both struggle with being tied to an evil, manipulative being that wants them isolated and weak and alone. Similar with Karlach, unwilling body modification, but specifically one that turns you into a 'monster'.
Astarion. 'Father'. 'Siblings' that you are in constant and brutal competition with, for momentary approval of your Creator who will never have enough of anything short but the world. Creator who's end goal very much includes you dying for him. Having no bodily autonomy as your Creator can literally violate your mind whenever. Sexual abuse. Struggling with bloodthirst! Your existence itself is violent, you can't live without hurting someone! (Bloodthirst for Ass, Urges for Durge)
Halsin. (Potential) guilt for something you have done, being pushed in a leadership position (Halsin at the grove, Durge with companions) that you may or may not be unsuited for. Being so, so alone, without anyone to care for your feelings. They both also have sides of them that they sometimes can't control, with the Bear and Urges, or more literally, the Slayer.
Minthara. A proud and efficent warrior that got one upped by a person they underestimated. Ties to Orin. Living as someone with the highest social status in a brutal, cruel society. Fanatic worship of an objectively evil god(ess) and then the betrayal that follows, waking up from quite literal brainwashing, seeing how your God(ess) turns against you.
And I could go on! Theyre all so good and interesting and depending on what path you decide to take, there is always something that Durge can relate to on with any companion! I tried to avoid repeating points or talking about my Durge specifically by just talking about what is set in canon for them, and there is still! So! Much!
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caligvlasaqvarivm · 5 months ago
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What do you think about Equius and Eridan's ship? I think this is a pretty entertaining idea (I'm aware that they don't really tolerate each other, but maybe they could share their problems with each other and help each other?)
I won't tell people what they should and shouldn't ship, but it's unsupported by canon & I personally don't think they'd be a good fit for each other, because Equius is kind of a prude who's genuinely made uncomfortable by Eridan's incredibly strong emotional neediness, and Eridan needs attention from his friends and especially romantic partners, which Equius isn't really equipped to provide. But again, if you like it, don't let me stop you!
Uhhh warnings for talking about sexual stuff because unfortunately Equius is just kind of Like That and you can't really discuss him in good faith without getting into it.
Basically, Equius's deal is that he's kind of sheltered. His specific position in the hemocaste means he gets to avoid a lot of the awful shit the other highbloods have to deal with, while still being high enough that he gets to avoid lowblood problems entirely. He doesn't have to worry about being culled or even of having to cull others - at least, not until adulthood - to the point where he's in a position to object to Nepeta killing wild animals. The murder of other real, thinking, breathing people seems like a distant problem for future Equius - not a tangible reality quickly catching up to him.
CT: D --> You e%terminate beautiful, innocent creatures by the hundreds CT: D --> I can't condone such wretched behavior CT: D --> Beasts are meant to be 100ked upon with adoration AC: :33 < but AC: :33 < i eat them! AC: :33 < i dont kill anything i dont eat, that would be mean CT: D --> I guess that's basically acceptable in principle, but I still find it a bit unsavory
He knows that Alternia is dangerous, and that bad, horrible things happen to other people (I mean, he's neighbors with Vriska lmao), but he has the privilege of simply electing not to participate, and that's the solution he keeps presenting to Nepeta: don't talk to the lowbloods, because they'll harm you, don't talk to the highbloods, because they'll harm you, and don't play their dangerous games. I mean, it works for him!
CT: D --> The thought of you fraternizing with and abetting those stink-b100ded h001igans strikes me as scandal beyond measure CT: D --> I'm afraid you're too delicate to withstand that sort of corruption
EQUIUS: D --> Yes, which is among the reasons why I must make your prote%ion a high priority EQUIUS: D --> The highb100d has joined a stable of those who are becoming increasingly volatile and murderous as we remain stranded in this laboratory EQUIUS: D --> I command you to steer clear of them, do you understand
He has a kindly lusus who takes very good care of him, met his soulmate very early on, has a neighbor/friend he gets along with pretty well, and gets to spend basically all of his free time pursuing his hobbies and interests with no pressing duties or responsibilities to distract him. As far as is possible on Alternia, he's lived a charmed and peaceful life.
Now, although I'm going to make the caveat early that he's not actually that casteist, Equius is still the most casteist member on the team, short of post-corruption!Gamzee. The fact that he's sheltered is one of the primary reasons for this: he's never had a reason to question casteism, because casteism has always been pretty correct in his book, and he's never had the need nor impetus to question it any further than that. After all, lowbloods DO wind up getting themselves into horrible situations, and highbloods DO tend to be murderous, dangerous assholes. This is just The Way Things Are, right?
For more specific examples, the Team Charge debacle - which Equius had to know about because he's the one who patched Vriska up afterwards - ended with Tavros unable to walk and Aradia "broken" (most of the team didn't know she was dead until they entered the game; Terezi tells Vriska she thinks "whatever Vriska did to her" must've broken her brain somehow since she was never the same since). Meanwhile, the two highbloods really only got injured by each other. In Equius's eyes, this would've reinforced his views: lowbloods live dangerous lives wrought by their inherent degeneracy, and always suffer worse for it, while highbloods are unstable and violent, but ultimately faultless and unpunishable except by each other.
He also - again - is Vriska's neighbor, and Vriska's psionics work best on lowbloods, so that's the vast majority of who she brings in for her lusus to eat. The two most crass people on the team are also Karkat and Sollux - the latter of which is very much a lowblood, while the former regularly throws himself in with the "gutter bloods"; the fact that they swear and make sex jokes genuinely freaks Equius out, since he's a sheltered little noble boy who refuses to say cuss words.
EQUIUS: D --> For pete's goodfornothing di%ie whistling SA%ES, Nepeta
So with Equius, we see how unexamined and uninterrogated privilege and sheltering can lead to genuinely harmful beliefs. Equius's feelings come from a good place: he sees all these poor lowbloods dying and suffering, and all these high bloods doing horrific, scary shit, and he instinctively knows that something is wrong and the world they live in is dangerous - or else he wouldn't be trying to protect Nepeta from it. He knows that because she's lower than he is on the hemospectrum, she's much more at risk than he is of something terrible happening to her, so as much as possible, he tries to keep her away from engaging with the rest of society.
CT: D --> Well, green b100d is ok, but it's not great CT: D --> But that's why you're lucky to have me to 100k out for you CT: D --> Because you don't know better, and you can't fight the role the mother had in store for you
But because he's had no reason to challenge or question the casteist beliefs he was taught, the horrific stuff he witnesses actually reinforces them. In an attempt to make sense out of the terrible world he lives in, he falls back on the easy answers, the ones he's been repeatedly told since he was a child: lowbloods suffer because they are inherently "worse" than highbloods, and highbloods are inherently "better," so they're allowed to indulge all their most violent and horrific impulses and it's not actually a problem. He's comfortable with his reality; why isn't everybody else?
So um, that brings us to the sex stuff. Basically, because Equius is so sheltered, he doesn't realize that he has a massive BDSM kink, and kind of a voyeurism kink, and that a lot of the gratification and pleasure he feels from indulging in them are... um......... "that kind" of gratification and pleasure. To be honest, I think if someone genuinely levelled with him and pointed it out, he'd have a mental breakdown over it. Because, like, at his core, Equius is a polite, kind, helpful guy. There's a reason he listens to Karkat same as the rest of the team, why he helps with Tavros's robot legs, why Nepeta even likes him so much. A lot of his worst aspects just stem from the fact that he's conflating his desire to be stepped on with the hemocaste being an inescapable, correct reality.
He's basically this post lol:
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So about specifically him and Eridan, like. We actually have Equius's outright stated opinion on Eridan.
CG: YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT, I DON'T GET IT CG: YOU KISS THE GROUND THIS LUNATIC WALKS ON BECAUSE HE HAS PURPLE BLOOD CG: BUT THAT DOESN'T STOP YOU FROM RIPPING ON ERIDAN, I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU DON'T LIKE HIM CG: AND HIS BLOOD IS EVEN PURPLIER, ISN'T IT? CT: D --> Yes CT: D --> That's different CT: D --> He is a sea dweller CT: D --> Our feud is codified in tradition CT: D --> Neigh, we are obligated to be at odds CT: D --> It's dignified ... CG: THE POINT IS, IF YOU SEE HIM, WOULD YOU MIND SNAPPING HIS STUPID WAND IN HALF OR SOMETHING? CG: AND THEN CHOKE HIM TO DEATH WITH HIS OWN SHITTY PRETENTIOUS SCARF. CT: D --> Do I really have to CG: GOD, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM NOW? CT: D --> I'd prefer not to interact with him CG: WHY CT: D --> It's primarily that his advances make me uncomfortable
See, Eridan... is not really Equius's type. And I can see why! Equius places a lot of importance on decorum and a100fness. Here's him basically telling Gamzee about why he's attracted to Gamzee and Aradia:
CT: D --> See, that's what I mean CT: D --> How is it possible for one of your distin%ion to be so ignorant CT: D --> And loathesome CT: D --> Whereas CT: D --> A member of the most abject, verminous b100dline of all CT: D --> Can conduct herself with such grace and possess nothing but admirable mannerisms CT: D --> I find these striking ju%tapositions perple%ing, and I confess strangely into%icating
He hates that Gamzee acts dumb and friendly, and wants him to be mean and commanding - and is probably lowkey picking up on the fact that Gamzee DOES have that within him, although he's hiding it. At the same time, he's weirdly attracted to how Aradia is aloof, intelligent, and strong-willed, despite being the lowest possible caste. Basically, Equius wants a pretty classically cultured dom to put him in his place - bonus points if caste-play is involved, whether it's a higher caste acting in accordance to their position on the spectrum, or a lower caste degrading him to a point below themselves.
So, initially, you'd think that Eridan would actually be his ideal for such a position, land dweller/sea dweller feud notwithstanding. After all, Eridan is all about acting like a traditional sea dweller, talking up his nobility and how much better he is than the lower castes, wanting the land dwellers dead/in their place, etc. etc.
But that's where we hit a snag. Eridan is pretending. He's pretending in the opposite direction of Gamzee, in fact. Where Gamzee is genuinely quite mean and nasty, but masking that in an attempt to get along better with his friends, Eridan is actually pretty - well, "nice" is the wrong word, but he's desperately presenting himself as meaner and more casteist than he actually is.
Equius wants to be effortlessly dominated, but Eridan puts in 110% at all times. Equius wants someone who upholds the caste system, and Eridan is actually totally indiscriminate when hitting on people because he actually doesn't give a shit about class differences. Equius wants someone who commands respect, but Eridan is kind of the team laughingstock. Also Eridan swears in proportion to his dialogue second only to Karkat.
Eridan's emotional desperation, disregard for the caste system, and cringefail antics are all massive turnoffs for Equius, and in a lot of ways, genuinely kind of scare him. I mean, again, Equius is a sheltered little noble boy who's made uncomfortable by cussing or killing animals for meat - and here's Eridan, one of the team's biggest murderers, genuinely obsessed with death and genocide, mouth of a sailor, willing to shoot his shot with anyone on the hemospectrum. Equius gets along better with Karkat, and Karkat's not even ON the hemospectrum.
It wouldn't even be pitch or ashen hatred to me, because Equius doesn't object to Eridan, morally or ethically - he just finds Eridan uncomfortable to be around, and prefers not to interact with him if he can help it. And that's really bad for Eridan, because Eridan's basically a huge emotional wreck and has a pretty fundamental need for emotional support and attention from his romantic partners - I've touched on it before, I think when I talked about him and Tavros, but Eridan has a genuine anxiety attack when Vriska accidentally ghosts him (because she's mercy killing her lusus), and I really don't think it would be good for him if he were to become emotionally attached to the guy whose whole Thing is standing in the background and watching without interacting.
As for discussing their problems... like, that's kind of the thing? They don't actually have overlapping problems. Eridan's issues primarily stem from the pressures his position on the hemocaste have placed on him, whereas Equius has actually actively benefited from and enjoyed his position in that class structure. Like, even if they tried to share notes on their respective character arcs about shirking the shitty things Alternia imposed on them, it'd be like,
EQUIUS: D--> Did you know that one's position in the hemospe%rum has little to no bearing on their moral integrity or worth as a person ERIDAN: are you a fuckin idiot eq
ERIDAN: guess all that obsessin ovver murder wwas a huge fuckin wwaste ERIDAN: and didnt do me no good nor anybody else for that matter EQUIUS: D--> Well EQUIUS: D--> Yeah
Even if we try to bring in things that aren't strictly related to being a high blood and what that means on Alternia - like if we run with the idea that Eridan's lusus contributed to Eridan's shitty childhood - well, unfortunately, Equius can't relate. Aurthour was incredibly kind to Equius growing up and he loved Aurthour dearly. So on and so forth.
And, uh... this is kind of weird to say, but despite how forward Eridan is about romance, he's actually... kind of reserved, sexually? He doesn't crack sex jokes and his fixation on romantic relationships is more about the act of being in a relationship than about what they do in that relationship. His date ideas are pretty straightforward and traditional, because he tends to prioritize "doing a good job" and "living up to the standard" over how he actually feels or his own personal interests.
What I'm saying is, Equius's horniness would probably make Eridan uncomfortable. Especially before Equius realizes that he's just got massive kinks that he should probably keep under control - which is basically the entire comic - Equius tends to prioritize what they do in a relationship over the act of actually being in a relationship. In fact, he'd probably be just as happy to get domm'd by Gamzee or Aradia even if they weren't actually dating. That's a kind of freedom and trueness to one's desires that Eridan can't manage; moreover, because Eridan tends to prioritize "doing a good job", he's pretty willing to go along with whatever his partner wants - which, in Equius's case, means Eridan doing more of the thing that's actively harmed them both. And I just don't think that that'd be good for Eridan.
So, yeah, overall, not a good fit for each other, but again, don't let me stop you!
The most interesting arrangement of Eridan and Equius, to me personally, is the fact that I think Eridan and Nepeta would actually be pretty good friends once they started talking (and Eridan got a moirail). Nepeta is the Anti-Casteism troll, the only one to outright state that she believes blood color shouldn't matter, and Eridan's whole deal is being less casteist than he pretends to be, to the point of genuinely being the least casteist highblood. And they both RP and hunt for stuff.
However, if there's any example of "dangerous highblood" on the team before Gamzee snaps, it's Eridan, and Equius has pretty deep concern for Nepeta's safety, which actually sometimes comes at Nepeta's detriment. It wouldn't escalate to pitch or ashen, but I really like the idea of the two of them having an antagonistic relationship because Equius does NOT want Nepeta interacting with this insane murderer, while Eridan is like, bro, let the kitty cat cave shipper girl decide for herself, and Nepeta is like, why must boys fight.
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dunmeshistash · 6 months ago
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in regards to skin tone variation in DM, i do think a lot of it is colorism/racism too. theres a few characters of color, but not many (just like how theres some fatter characters, but none of them are main characters (even senshi & other dwarves arent really depicted as fat)).
ryoko kui has surface representation for these people, but it lacks much substance, and the brown characters she does draw arent given brown facial features, and are almost always colored with very ashy skin. a lot of them just look like a recolored white person (especially cithis, kaka, & kiki). her random portraits of characters who dont actually appear in the series otherwise tend to be much better about this, but the actual characters that show up and play a part all seem to suffer from this issue.
im not saying kui is like, super-duper racist and we all need to stop reading DM etc etc, but i think its important to recognize and point out everyday/usually-overlooked colorism & racism when we see it, and i know im not the first or only person to point this out about her character designs. if she can draw fat people and actual brown people as part of the portraits, why cant she or wont she do the same for any of the featured characters in the series?
(i know the orcs are fat, but its not a good thing the only consistently fat people are the ones who are a fantasy race based off of violent racial stereotypes, who are also pig people, while none of the main cast of "real" humans are fat except *maybe* the dwarves, who still have small waists and flat stomachs, and the lord of the island, who is depicted as corrupt & decadent)
Well yeah.
I'm just a lore blog so I don't like to get too into real life issues or make assumptions about how the author feels about these subjects. What I talked about on the skin tone post was assumptions as to why she thought it would be important to show skin tone variations on certain races as a character design choice. (In the sense that her character design is very purposeful)
I realize some people over praise Kui's designs when most of it is pretty safe for what it is, but even if it's just a step closer to better representation it's something that's rare to see in anime. So I understand why some people get so excited about it.
It is important to realize this isn't the ideal either (Dark skinned characters with the same features as the others, mostly well build characters on the thinner side) but I personally don't like to criticize these type of stories on what it "could/should have been".
As someone who is fat and not white, I'm happy we get some diversity in dungeon meshi. I hope this opens up the possibility of better character design in the future even if what we got now wasn't perfect.
It shouldn't be the case that this piece of art filled me with so much joy I teared up cause I had never seen someone with a similar body to mine drawn with so much respect and objectivity. But unfortunately that's the world we live in and I don't think it's wrong to be happy for what we get for now while acknowledging it's not perfect and that it should be better.
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I'm also super happy the anime chose to make the dark characters even darker.
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harmonysanreads · 8 months ago
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Hi Harmony! I just noticed that your requests are open and I decided to drop by with a small request I thought about for weeks.
I was thinking about Arlecchino for a while, and it made me ponder of the concept of Arlecchino with a darling on a reincarnation AU. Maybe Arlecchino has met her darling at such an inconvenient time, and every time that it has happened, only she remembers their past lives.
It probably goes to the point that Arlecchino starts devising ways to be able to keep her darling safe, because each time they would meet, her darling gets into an accident... And it would seem that each time she tried, then it would simply fail. And it would push to a point where she resorts to one of the more not so morally good methods.
I don't know if this counts as a req. or a brainrot, but I offer you this idea because I think it could be interesting to think about sometimes. You're free to deny it btw if its typical, hard, or overall you can't write it <3 I completely understand if that's the case.
(p.s.: this is the one running @yxstxrdrxxm BAHAHAHAHAHA I'm sorry if I haven't replied to your message during OLC, I dont know how to talk to you w/o sounding really awkward </3 also!! hydration check! Anyways thats all, have fun with the idea + I hope you have a great day Harmony :D)
Pantomime Of The Night
yandere!arlecchino x reader
cw(s) : yandere, vampire!arlecchino, mentions of blood, murder, slight gore, non-consensual touching, unbalanced power dynamics
wc : 2.1k
a/n: omg hiii! would you believe me if I said I was just thinking about you before getting this ask? also please don't worry about my message! i had a hunch that you might be in a situation of sorts. thank you so so much for requesting arlecchino because i've been itching to write for her for a long time! i decided to go with vampire!arlecchino for this because i thought it'd suit the reincarnation theme well. i hope you enjoy it<3
lovely illustration based on this fic by a lovely person <3 (spoiler alert!)
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At the deepest hours of the night, even the innocent crackles of hearthfire sound as clamorous as gun-shots.
You're dazed by the flame's continuous dance until the aroma of freshly brewed tea reaches your senses and the servants have left. A sharp clank from Arlecchino's glass and the weight of her gaze prompt you to meet her eyes. The light from the fireplace casts shadows on the other half of her fair face, she seemed to have foregone her usual taught posture in favor of a relaxed one. One of her hands supports her cheek while the other holds the wine glass, the beverage within sloshes as the claw-like accessories on her fingers curl around the object.
Your side of the table is far more decorated, desserts that you've never even seen in your impoverished mortal life and that tea you've grown fond of over the course of your stay in her mansion sit appetizingly. All beckon you to feast, all seek to fan the flames of voracity and you offer but a thoughtless stare in return.
The master of the house seems to have noticed your lack of appetite as she finally breaks the stretched out silence, “These are all confectioneries of the highest quality from the town and as I recall, all of your favorites. But you give them no more than a blank stare... you've also not taken a sip from the tea. May I inquire why?”
The raspy tone of her observation has your arms covered in gooseflesh, though, you note she does not sound as confused as her words suggest. You can feel her onyx eyes gloss over every part of your person, inspecting and dissecting each and every visible clue. You swallow dryly, “It’s just that it's way too late in the night,”
“Yet you look as ready as ever to head out. Tell me, have you been anticipating my return, dearest?”
Arlecchino stares pointedly at your attire, likely referring to the traveling clothes you have on instead of the silk nightwear that she had gifted. Your shoulders tense unconsciously, there's something about the way she speaks at this instance that has your heartbeat crescendoing. The silver haired woman gives you a few more beats of anxiety, her talons scrape against the dainty glass.
“I’ve been informed that you have not eaten anything since yesterday.”
The words escape her painted lips easily, but they don't fail to send a jolt through your system. Throughout your stay, she'd never spoken to you like this, like you were one of her children who did not know better and decided to cross a line. That realization renders you further puzzled, you did nothing wrong to begin with, but her tone made you feel as though you were on the verge of doing so. You clear your parched throat and gather yourself to meet her eyes. This time, you do not allow yourself to wilt at the force of her burning stare.
“Arlecchino, I have something to tell you.”
The addressed woman straightens up at your sudden serious tone, her hand abandons the wine glass on the table and you inhale involuntarily at the scratches that now decorate the object, “I’m all ears, dearest.”
Your brows crease, as usual, Arlecchino is courteous, too courteous for someone who makes it obvious she's informed of something that she wasn't supposed to know. She's been like this ever since you and your travel-partner stepped foot in her ambiguous estate. Initially, you were touched by the hospitality she and her adopted children had shown you. Your greed lulled any arising suspicions, you neither questioned why she'd been so generous to a commoner with nothing more than fifty mora to their name nor did you bother to think about how she was affording all those gifts. You naïvely wished to believe in her kindness and that nothing was wrong about this house. But of course, self-woven deceptions last so long.
“Before you mistake me for being ungrateful, I did plan to inform you before leaving. Me and my friend are extremely thankful for the care your house has shown us, but we cannot stay in one place forever.”
“Why not?” you halt at her abrupt question but she follows up before you could even part your lips, “Have we lacked in any area to provide you with the adequate comfort? Have any of my children said something? If it's the latter, I'll apologize in their stead, they can be quite playful at times, I'm sure you understand.”
You stare dumbfounded at the sudden turn this conversation has taken, she wasn't supposed to behave like this. Why is she searching for a reason to make you stay when she should've been happy that a burden was about to be lifted off of her shoulders? Are all nobles this pushy?
“I—” you cut yourself off as the silver-haired woman leans in without warning, her shadow envelopes the delicacies laid out on the small table.
“Or… have you seen something?” she drawled.
You cannot hold back a flinch this time. A curse echoes in your mind at your stupidity, this was no ‘conversation’ to begin with ; this was yet another trap and you'd willingly played right into the palm of Arlecchino's hand. If there's one thing you've learned about this mysterious noblewoman, it is that she enjoys the process of dragging answers out of everyone. From the very beginning, she was aware of your scheme but, she chose to wear that mask of courtesy one more time and lured you out in the open, unguarded. If only your friend arrived to fetch you from your room at the right time, you wouldn't be in this messy situation.
Your eyes dart from her unblinking expression to the sharp accessories that adorn her gloved fingers and something about them forces you to reply quickly.
“No! I mean, you know that I'm a traveler, do you not? It's already been six months since we came to your estate, me and my friend were starting to.. crave that adventurous thrill—yes! We were starting to miss being on the road and decided to depart in the early morning.”
Once upon a time, your late mother had told you that some people in this world are like spiders. They're always at the centerpiece of their lair, leaving intricate translucent webs for unassuming prey to get tangled upon. Although the croaked warnings of your bedridden mother did not make much sense to the younger you, you understood now exactly what she meant.
“Incorrect. You were planning to escape with that friend of yours, weren't you?”
The hearthfire burns bright, shrouding Arlecchino's expression in shadows. The chilling octave of her voice defeats the warmth of the fireplace and has every muscle in your body stiffened. Escape? Her word choice never ceased to baffle you throughout this faux tea-party. She speaks as though you were her prisoner instead of a guest. She tilts her head and has the audacity to look betrayed as though you were a possession she held dear, and not a random human she decided to take pity upon.
Arlecchino runs a hand through her silvery hair with a sigh that actually indicates ennui and you bite back a scowl, “Honestly, I do not understand why you even befriended that thing. He's an obnoxious blabbermouth with a nose bigger than his brain. And he's loud, too. You've always preferred to mingle with level headed people with a sufficient intellectual capacity in the past and here you are, glaring at me as though—”
“Don’t speak like you know me!”
You pant after the force of that outburst, your voice ricochets across the walls of her room and further beyond. You open your mouth to continue but stop when you notice a strange flicker in the silver-haired woman's eyes. It's gone in a blink and is replaced with irritation just as quickly however.
“Oh, but I do know you. I know you better than you know yourself, in fact. I know that there are exactly 11 moles throughout your body, I know all your preferences and fears. Don't believe me? Did you really never stop to question how I managed to give you things that catered to your tastes? How I knew what you desired even before you did? Or were you so mesmerized by the words of that friend of yours to pay minimum attention?”
If the tone of a person's voice could kill, you'd be rotting in a ditch by now. You would've never believed someone could sound this malicious while not even raising their voice. You want nothing more than to shrink away but the adrenaline accumulated through your anger pushes you to keep digging your grave.
“And so what if that's exactly how it is? You have no right to have a say in who I choose to be ‘mesmerized’ by!”
A ‘ha!’ laden with disbelief escapes Arlecchino's lips. Fine silvery strands bounce at the mocking tilt of her head, “So what will you do now? Walk out of the gates with that waste of space like nothing happened?”
“Oh, you bet I will!” you fume, rising from the chair and turning on your heels. You barely take one step away from the table until the full weight of Arlecchino's malice crashes down on you and you remember something important.
“Arlecchino, where is my friend?”
The silver haired woman leisurely raises her wine glass at your stilted words, “In my glass.”
You swivel towards her, blinking several times as if to confirm you didn't mishear.
“Well, here and… probably in the stomachs of my pet vultures, excluding the carcass, that is. I'll admit, the taste is subpar compared to the trouble I went through. That thing kept on screaming until one of the vultures tore its heart out. Ugh, my ears are still ringing.”
Your wide eyes tremble towards the glass in her hand, the deep red liquid within sloshes to the direction of Arlecchino's hand ; paired with her words, your friend’s destiny becomes a no-brainer. All your wits abandon you in that instance and in a moment of sheer panic, you take a step back. Arlecchino promptly interferes with your plans, the door and windows close with no little sound and the table and your chair disappear without a trace—all in the snap of her fingers.
“What are you?”
You would've screamed if you didn't forget how to use your lungs. But then again, you doubt anyone would come to save you from her clutches even if you did. Your eyes connect to her onyx ones and in that moment, she appeared far less human than she'd been this whole encounter. Her pupils flash as two red xs and you feel an invisible pull tugging you to her side. The temptation dominates any coherent thoughts until you find yourself an arms length away from her seated self. Her claws dig into the flesh of your arm and yank you to her lap.
Free from the haze of that strange sensation, the first thing that permeates your senses is how cold Arlecchino's proximity is. Your palm meets her chest in a feeble attempt to push her away but all it does is stun you when you notice the absence of a heartbeat. You feel the sting of something sharp on your chin and waist, your eyes glance back and forth between the sources—dread pools in your stomach. Because of your closeness and the light from the fireplace, you're able to see that the sharp objects you'd mistaken for accessories are actually her nails and the gloves, her real skin.
Perhaps your trembling was so pitiful that Arlecchino could not help but soften her gaze, “Do you truly not recall?”
You look up at her, thoroughly perplexed. There's that previous glint in her eyes again but you've already accepted that understanding this woman was beyond you. One moment she accuses you as though you've been unfaithful, then she vividly describes how she murdered an innocent man and the next she looks almost… hurt?
“Recall what?”
The silver-haired woman’s red lips part and you gulp as unnaturally sharp fangs sneer at you. Albeit, she does not answer you and you wonder if you should get accustomed to playing mental gymnastics with her just to get a simple answer. Her talons let go of your waist and drag their up to your collarbone, creating a deliberate and irrepairable tear on your clothes. Her nails drum against your skin for three seconds before they latch onto your throat.
“Although, that'll no longer be an issue.”
She forces you to make eye-contact with a sharp tug on your chin, the color drains from your face as her cool breath washes against your skin. You open your mouth to say something, anything, but are quickly shushed as you feel her fangs sink into your lower lip.
“Because, we'll have ample time to get acquainted with each other starting from today.”
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mjso-soupp · 4 months ago
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Subaru Headcanons
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shitty headcanons for my fav vampire bcs i haven’t updated my fic 😍
Around you: Now I don't think he would necessarily be shy, but more afraid to embarrass himself around you. He’d check himself more than usual, making sure his face wasn’t bright red whenever you held onto him tightly around his brothers, or make sure he didn’t stutter when your eyes looked more doe than usual.
Belly: He probably eats a lot, like a real teenage boy. He doesn’t have a favorite food so he just eats whatever he finds in the kitchen, and that includes lots of snacking since he doesn’t feel the need to make a meal that would actually fill him. He’d rather just wait til some food pops up to eat it.
Clothes: His wardrobe consists mainly of black, white or some other dark color. I like to think he wears one of those compression shirts to bed or under his jackets. He definitely keeps old clothes too because he thinks it ‘matches his vibe’. Due to his strength, if he was late for school one day, he probably tore a hole in his shirt from pulling it violently over his head in a hurry.
Dating: I dont think it’s him that has much trouble snagging a girl— definitely not. It’s what he does AFTER snagging a girl that confuses him, because, what now? He’s awkward because of his self destructive self image so all he can really think about is, “Will she really stay with me?” Or “When will this be over?” But I don’t think he’s much of a dater, more like hoping to just pop up on the ‘one’ some day (Which seems inevitable because he never leaves his coffin).
Excess: It’s a good thing he’s an albino because this man probably grows so much hair, like peach fuzz all along his body. His character design obviously shows he’s an albino but his eyebrows probably have a thin shape made up of long hairs he doesn’t care to pluck because they don’t really show. He also has a long full head of hair that in the art shows red undertones.
Eye contact (Bonus): Since he’s an albino, his eyes twitch and that leaves more reason for him not being able to hold eye contact. He subconsciously looks away and focuses on inanimate objects rather than the person directly in front him.
Fangs: This man was blessed with a strong pair of fangs. They show the most out of the other brothers when he speaks or eats. He wouldn’t so much as take pride in this but focuses on why having such sharp canines is much more of a nuisance to him, like accidentally biting his cheek while chewing.
Grooming: He doesn’t smell bad, everyone has their own scent and his is strong with musk and soap. Probably uses a bar of soap for his body and face, then follows up with whatever shampoo appeared in his shower that day. Whenever he brushes his hair with no care whatsoever, he just brushes til he can’t feel a tug on his hair from the brissels. Doesn’t matter if he brushed it out of place, it’ll fall back later.
Health: I guess in the long run this doesn’t matter since he’s a vampire, but he probably has some unhealthy habits. He definitely smokes or has smoked cigarettes. His relationship with drugs is inconclusive. But I like to think that his relationship with Kou has something to do with Kou’s potential past addiction(?) They probably bonded over that.
Intelligence: Being alive for years means something has stuck to him. He’s more street smart than book smart though, he doesn’t really pay attention in school (RIP Subaru you would’ve loved chat gpt). He forgets how to find the circumference of a circle but knows how to kill someone in one swift motion(?)
Jaded: Subaru’s probably tired of the whole madonna or mistress dynamic. Why can’t he have both? He wouldn’t necessarily want someone to dominate him but more so have someone who can keep up with him, less work for him you know? He already has a bad relationship with the idea of a woman on his side. Why does he have to choose between a woman to accompany him in his dreams (Madonna) or a woman who helps him fulfill his desires(Mistress)?
Kinks: Definitely into some sort of knife play, choking or really anything that exerts his dominance over you.
Laugh: He doesn’t really laugh but when he does it’s mostly a scoff or a chuckle. Maybe if something really is funny to him he might laugh for more than a second but that’s really it. His laugh isn’t loud but it’s more like really low and deep so it comes out louder than he wants it too so he’ll get embarrassed.
Mature: Subaru’s definitely one of the more mature brothers. Dealing with his mother’s mental illness and instability at a young age really rocked him, he grew up way too fast. This is genuinely the reason as to why he doesn’t like children or doesn’t like to associate himself with them. He truly believes he’ll ‘ruin’ them and ruin their childhood like he had his ruined.
Nature: He loves it. He doesn’t admit it though because he tries to be hard. (These are misogynistic vampires after all..) In anger he likes to rip and tear petals off flowers but feels bad after, just another thing to add onto his list of things he’s corrupted. He takes care of the rose garden in his free time.
Open-minded: Considering his personality (Edgy, angsty, rule breaker) I think he’s in the middle. He’s definitely more open then Reiji, Carla and other more superior brothers, but he’s not as open as Laito. Maybe to societal norms he’s more open but to sexual topics he’s closed and private about.
Personality: He’s rude, like, really rude. How he acts with you depends on your relationship though: If you’re more well acquainted (in terms of Subaru acquainted) he’s probably rude and likes to insult you through jokes, but if you’re more romantically involved it’s less subtle (He’s still throwing insults, just at a less) He’s probably really funny without meaning to be. More so if he says something and his brothers turn it into a whole different embarrassing topic making him turn red and everyone laughing at him. He’s of course, the definition of ultraviolence, and probably wants to get into being a gym rat but isn’t that motivated.
Quirks: Has so many. He likes to cover his left eye with his hair, but brushes it out of his face over and over again. His pale hands that are bruised and beaten make him stand out also, he likes to pick at his nails too. When he’s in a bad mood, his legs bounce annoyingly, making his boots click repeatedly. When a shirt is a little too tight, he stretches it out but rips it in the process (He’ll still wear it.)
Romantic: Well he’s not materialistic.. he doesn’t lay rose petals everywhere, open a bottle of champagne while sharing a five-star hotel with you. He’s more likely to stay in and just spend time with you one to one. He definitely tries to be more affectionate at times but it just seems awkward to him.
Smells: Probably doesn’t enjoy super sugary smells like vanilla or caramel. He likes to smell lightweight floral or mature scents on a woman, sweet smells don’t taste good on your skin. For a man, he likes to smell very strong cologne, it’s just satisfying to him for some reason.
Touch: Is a hugger. He loves hugging you from the back and wrapping his arms around your shoulders. Also is a kisser(?) He’s always kissing you DEEPLY. It’s a shocker lol, but he definitely enjoys some sort of connection with you.
Unique: His appearance, overall that’s pretty much what everyone notices at first. Considering his mom was a ‘white rose’, his way of standing out from the other brothers is his soft color palette clashing with dark fabrics that are ripped. I really do believe his eyes are the next thing that are unique because of how much they tremble.
Vocal: Maybe, in the chance you get him to open up to you, he would talk for hours. He would talk about what he thinks about his life, his brothers and why he feels the way about himself. He would speak about his mother in a soft delicate manner but go bitter right after and go quiet.
Water: He didn’t have exactly the best time in the pacific ocean after destroying that statue, so it’s a no. He’s obviously very clean but prefers quick showers and doesn’t like waiting for the bath to fill up with water.
Xanax: He def needs a xanny.
Yucks: He doesn’t like seafood, (although he would eat ayato’s takoyakis in the blink of an eye) Doesn’t like school, at all. Doesn’t like hyper pop music, or just like pop in general. Likes shoes that are easy to slip on, his boots are molded to his feet. So church shoes that require you to wear nice socks and tie them are a no for him.
Zzz: He loves to sleep, he genuinely enjoys sleeping in his tight coffin every night. He goes to sleep late on school days so he can easily sleep through lectures and such, but loves going to sleep early on weekends so he can rest for a couple more hours.
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