#and think about their parents perspective of it would be
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First of all thank you SO MUCH for being a safe space to be critical of the new arcane season. I wanted to love it. I really really did. But there’s just too much I can’t look past. It’s nice to have a blog I can scroll through where everyone is in a similar boat.
The more I think about it the more I take issue with the concept behind episode 7. Don’t get me wrong from a stand-alone perspective it’s the best episode in the new season and had my favorite moments. But the more I think about the more it feels…icky. I’m absolutely not opposed to seeing a well adjusted Powder I love Jinx and her tragedy is the hardest hitting part of the show for me. That said, season 1 gave me the impression that powder was always going to grow up “bad” due to the circumstances she was born into.
Even from the beginning, we see she experiences psychosis, and likely other unnamed mental conditions (I resonate most with the idea of her having bpd.) OBLIGATORY mental illness OBVIOUSLY does not make you a bad person—I deal with a lot of them myself—but Powder was growing up in a situation where the world was against her. She was in a triggering environment that exacerbated her mental health issues. In my opinion, Powder’s tragedy was about how the situation she was born into took a vulnerable young girl, chewed her up, and spit her out as a “monster.”
Then we get episode 7 where… everything is ok?? Don’t get me started on the peace between zaun and piltover its ridiculous and that’s all been said. The scenes on the bridge especially irk me WHY are people so freely traveling between the two cities what happened to the classism WHERE IS THE SOCIOECONOMIC INEQUALITY??
To return to Powder, I get what they were going for. I do. I personally have OCD that only flares up when my mental health is bad and is mostly unnoticeable otherwise. I get that one episode isn’t much time to explore things, but I take issue that after LOSING HER SISTER powder would just? Be okay??? Well adjusted?? Maybe I’m biased. One of my favorite things about Jinx are her struggles with mental health—it hits close to home. It hurts to see Arcane mostly drop that in the second season. Does au!Powder have psychosis episodes? Does she ever hallucinate Vi? What about her abandonment issues? It feels so cheap to me to say actually if Powder had never accidentally blown up her family she would have been completely healthy and fine actually—her path to becoming Jinx always always had a societal problem at the root of it.
And maybe you’ll say well powder has a better support system so of course she’s doing fine and I can almost accept that… except for the apparent peace between piltover and zaun?? ARCANE WHERE IS THE SOCIOECONOMIC INEQUALITY YOU CANNOT TELL ME YOU FORGOT? She’s not facing the same kind of discrimination and hardship that main universe Jinx experienced and that made her story so compelling. Now again, one episode isn’t much to explore and perhaps she has issues bubbling under the surface, but it feels strange to completely drop that part of her character in favor of everyone is happy and fine and alive (except vi fuck you vi).
Tldr; Jinx’s story stood out to me as a tragedy about how a bad environment can exacerbate already present mental health issues. She was ALWAYS doomed—she did not have the kind of support and care she needed. Jinx’s problem was never that ooooooog trauma (and silco’s parenting) made her evil. Jinx’s problem is that the world simply doesn’t give a fuck about her and throws her to the wolves. You can remove the trauma from the Powder, but you can’t ever forget that she’s living on the underside of Piltover’s boot.
I can see what they were going for with well-adjusted powder and don’t get me wrong I LOVED her she was so cute. But in combination with some of the other uhhh decisions this season made it just feels like a cop out. Her issues with mental health are nonexistent and yay piltover doesn’t hate poor people anymore, isnt that great? If I could change even one thing I’d give her a little psychosis episode in the scene where Ekko questions her about VI’s death—tying her back to Jinx and causing Ekko to break down the boundaries even more between his mental schema of Powder vs Jinx.
Also don’t even get me started on how I’ve seen some people in the fandom respond. I’ve already seen “awwww ekko should’ve gotten to keep sane!jinx” which. HELLO???
Np~ I am glad to share people's thoughts with the world!! It's nice to read similar thoughts and opinions to your own.
Yeah T.T I enjoyed the p so much, but it was still riddled with the same issues that plagued the rest of the season. The largest is definitely the fact that none of the kids had proper childhoods because the system they live under doesn't allow them peace. You are so right on Powder's episodes - when Ekko started pressuring her and she told him to get out before she does something she'll regret, I legit thought we were about to witness one. She had the body language and the tone of someone who IS about to go off, but then she... Just didn't... Add to that the unrealistic economic situation, which I've already ranted about, and you remove the two unshakeable factors which contributed to Jinx' downfall. Once again the writers are forgetting that the characters didn't start having issues in s1e1, but were suffering long before the show started.
The point of the episode is sort of Dynasties and Dystopia 2: Electric Boogaloo, in that it's dedicated to Ekko's mental separation between Powder and Jinx breaking down. But where in the first instance the breaking came from a really organic place - him realizing mid-battle she remembers their childhood friendship as well as he does - this time it's much simpler. Like. Of COURSE he would start caring for her again if he met her under the most perfect circumstances, where loving her is super duper easy. Letting Powder exhibit her "Jinx"ish tendencies more often would have been a much more interesting situation. I did appreciate the ones she'd had - creating a Vi doll, treating her like she's still alive - but it could have gone even further imo.
As for those saying he should have gotten to keep her as Powder... No what. The point of the episode was that the Powder he'd met made him miss the Jinx he'd known. He wasn't tempted to stay in the perfect world (akhem Heimerdinger akhem) because none of those people could understand him. It's the reason he trusted Vi despite her suspicious return to the Undercity - he can't help but feel connected to those who went through the same trauma he had back then. And that's my fav aspect of why he still cares about Jinx - for the longest time, the two of them were the only survivors of THEIR Undercity. She chose Silco, but she was still the only one who could understand his pain, even across enemy lines. I missed this in s2, too. He said he'd given up on the Undercity becoming a better place, which is bs, he absolutely never did. The only thing he'd given up was her!! SO the speech really should have been about that, and the alienation he'd felt.
In short, I don't really think the episode should have had a "perfect" AU to show Ekko a lesson. It would have been much more interesting to keep it realistic. But oh well, I suppose that's just the chorus of s2
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I think it’s sure that Eddie will go to Texas and that sooner rather than later he will return to L.A. with Chris, after confronting his parents.
My speculation: The Díaz grandparents are obviously extracting info from Chris, and Chris in his innocence, has probably shown them lots of photos and videos and has had lots of conversations with them about his life and his happy moments with him and his dad, and him and his dad and Buck, and his dad and Buck, and him and Buck, and hey here’s another one of Buck, and, and… and here they are at school, and at home, at Buck’s place, with tia Pepa, during Christmas, doing homework, etc.
So depending on their level of homophobia/civility/willingness to stir the pot or not, we could get anything from :
1. a simple statement when Eddie tells them they decided to go back to L.A. like “it’s about that Buck fella, isn’t it?” With no further elaboration, or Eddie says “what do you mean?” And they explain what Chris told and showed them, and Eddie doesn’t deny it.
2. An argument because how come Eddie lets an Unrelated Male have such access to their grandson and have such a grip over his and their grandson’s lives? What do you mean this man has keys to your house and picks our grandson from school? And he babysits him too? And why’s he in your Christmas photos and why does Chris call him his Buck? Why do you have pictures of him in your fridge?
3. Nothing at the moment, but once in L.A., the Díaz grandparents suing for custody of Chris and alleging that Eddie endangers him by allowing an Unrelated Male to have access to him and to his household and be a Bad InfluenceTM to them both; citing all the previous questions. This would be actually pretty easy to win since everyone (including Chris) would come on to testify that he’s a firefighter who saves lives and a pillar of the community and he loves Chris and he’s a golden retriever etc.
Either way, the point is that Eddie would be forced to confront his reality with Buck from an outside perspective and to really face his feelings about what Buck means to him, maybe even talk about it with people like Bobby or Chim. I think at no point would anyone mention the words “gay” or “boyfriends” or “romance”, but everyone will know what they’re talking about.
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The whole Eddie moving to Texas thing I feel like is how they continue the story of Eddie actively choosing joy for himself and also using it as a way for Eddie to finally stand up to his parents. Rn he sees the situation as this:
My son is in El Paso because of a mistake I made. I’m missing out on him growing up. Therefore, I will move to El Paso to be with my son. Even though my son hasn’t said anything about me wanting to move there or him staying there permanently, I will assume this is what he wants therefore it’s the best decision for both of us.
But once he realizes that if he actually wants to make a decision on what is “best for Christopher,” he needs to make a decision on where he himself is the happiest. Which is definitely away from his own parents. He needs to choose his own joy for once instead of someone else’s, because sacrificing himself for what he thinks what Chris wants won’t help either of them in the long run.
Once he does this, some of the situation will be still somewhat the same, but Eddie will also highlight how his parents role in this has led the situation to where it is now. He’ll finally stop punishing himself for making this mistake, and instead will start trying to fix it.
With this new perspective, Eddie will start viewing the situation like this:
My son went to El Paso because of a mistake I made, but he’s still in El Paso because my parents were too eager to scoop him up when they found out about the mistake I had made. (We saw him touch on this lightly already during conversation with the priest). I’m missing out on him growing up because the adults who are taking care of him currently aren’t telling me stuff about my son that I should know. Therefore, instead of moving to El Paso to be with my son, I will visit El Paso to be with my son. And since my son hasn’t said anything about wanting to stay in El Paso permanently, I will talk to him while I’m there visiting him about what he wants instead of just assuming what he wants. What is best for me is to be in LA where I have built a career, and with it a family. And what’s best for Christopher is for him to be with me, in a place where I’m the happiest. Therefore I will fight to get him back.
Ok I’m done rambling. Just wanted to say that I agree with you that I don’t think Eddie actually going to move to El Paso, because it would be reductive to his most recent storyline.
i agree that this is related to his choosing joy, but i kind of really disagree with this reading. you're framing it as a mistake in eddie's thought process but i fundamentally do not think that this is him making a poor decision because he's making assumptions about what chris wants. he's doing this based on quite literally what he is being shown and told. chris KNOWS that eddie wants him to come home. eddie's parents KNOW that eddie wants chris to come home. but there is literally no sign that chris seems interested in doing that at this point because eddie's parents are doing nothing to foster reconciliation AND eddie's parents have set up a situation wherein eddie asking that question looks like possibly threatening chris's happiness—which is fragile because of HIM. what eddie knows is that christopher left los angeles to get away from him. moving to el paso is going against what eddie believes christopher wants. like, yes, he's making a sacrifice, but it's not for chris's own good, it's for HIS own good.
the point is that eddie doesn't want to sit in los angeles 800 miles away from his son waiting and hoping that chris will change his mind or his parents will suddenly start telling him things. it makes him MORE miserable to be far away from chris. THAT is why he's considering moving to texas: because getting to watch chris grow up is a part of EDDIE'S joy. this IS the only choice he feels like he can make in order to fight for their relationship because he literally HAS been trying this whole time to do what he thinks is best for chris and punishing himself in the process—staying away and letting things happen—and all it's done is driven a wedge in between them. which is why he's not doing that anymore!
choosing to be where christopher is IS him choosing joy in whatever way he can, without feeling like he's putting chris at risk! because, yes, eddie needs to choose joy, but what's just as important to him is that chris is still allowed to make choices. this IS the beginning of him fighting for chris! but you're assuming that he has a full picture of what's happening, and that he's actually in a position where he and chris can have an honest conversation without risking someone getting hurt, and that's just not the case at all.
#asks#sorry but this framing of the situation has really been annoying me because it feels like trying to shoehorn things into an s5 situation#when the circumstances are completely different and EDDIE is completely different#i’m not saying it’s the right choice because of course it’s not#or even that it’s an objectively sane or normal choice#but he is literally desperate. it’s COMPLETELY understandable why he thinks he has to do this
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"During early development of The Veilguard, BioWare experimented with multiplayer once again, however, Epler insists that there was never a mandate from parent company Electronic Arts to implement any specific online or live-service modes; the devs were just exploring different ways to tell the story. Eventually, BioWare ditched the multiplayer aspects to focus solely on creating a single-player experience, aiming to meet the lofty expectations of the fandom. “We’re a studio built to make single-player RPGs,” Epler says. “And more importantly, I think a lot of people have come here to build single-player, story based RPGs. So, it just kind of ended up making more sense to make this game the way it is versus a multiplayer game.” With the transition back to a core single-player emphasis, many of The Veilguard’s systems had to be reworked, including one that Bioware is most famous for: the companion system. Unlike previous Dragon Age games, The Veilguard only lets players take on two companions instead of three — more in line with how the party system works in Bioware’s other big game, Mass Effect. However, when developers were testing out multiplayer for the game, it had the classic four-player party setup where the player and three other friends could join. But now that The Veilguard was strictly a solo affair, BioWare wanted to focus on the main protagonist, Rook, and their companions. Banter between the party was essential to get them to feel like fully-realized characters. In previous Dragon Age games, whenever the player traversed the world, non-playable party members would talk to each other about current events or their interests, fleshing out their perspectives and constantly evolving the dynamic between the team. This was usually reserved for just two characters at a time, however, with the third generally meandering off to the side. “One of the biggest things we got slammed on at Dragon Age: Inquisition’s launch was people felt there wasn’t enough companion banter because it wasn’t firing as often,” Epler says. “So much of our companion banter is built around two characters interacting. When it came down to it, it felt like [three] was the right number when we were building the game.” And while it took some time to come to a final number of active party members, Epler insists that initial experimentation with multiplayer didn’t impact the decision in the end. “It was not a relic of the multiplayer at all,” he says. “In fact, one of the few things that survived was the four-person party until we tried it out a lot and realized that three made the most sense for the game.”"
"Lessons to be learned While Anthem’s poor reception wasn’t the sole reason for BioWare’s decision to focus on creating single-player, narrative-driven games again, it was clearly a catalyst. One of the biggest complaints about the game from fans was the lack of traditional storytelling and characters that made the studio revered in the first place, especially coming off the back of one of the developers’ weakest links, Andromeda. “We were alienating parts of our fan base that had been with us for a long time, and not successfully bringing in anyone else through the multiplayer side of things,” Epler says. “The reception to Anthem was very clear in that we needed to get back to those aspects that we did well, and multiplayer became an obstacle in the way of doing just that.” [...] The biggest lesson that BioWare learned from Mass Effect: Andromeda’s botched launch was the importance of polish. The game became the butt of jokes and a slew of memes for its hilarious visual glitches, a legacy that leaves Epler feeling torn. “I do think Andromeda was a better game than its reception suggested, but on the flip side, I don’t think the reception was unfair,” he recalls. “At the time of launch, there were technical issues and things that didn’t work.” Avoiding these issues again was of critical importance to Epler and the rest of the team, especially as they sought to get back on players’ good graces. Another lesson that BioWare took from critics of Andromeda, and Inquisition too, was that sometimes building a massive open world doesn’t mean much when it isn’t filled with meaningful content. At the time both games were being developed, open worlds and big explorable spaces had become an industry trend, even in games where they failed to serve the overall vision. BioWare still wanted players to have a sense of discovery in The Veilguard, but also didn’t want to settle for an open-world that the developers couldn’t realistically fill. “We had been doing Dragon Age pre-production on versions of Dragon Age 4, and we did have a version that was a lot more open-world,” Epler says. “But again, we ran into the same problem of how do you make it compelling or narratively interesting? The reception to Andromeda definitely solidified that.”"
"Staying focused on what’s next With Dragon Age: The Veilguard now complete, BioWare confirms that there are currently no plans for downloadable expansions. The developers’ full attention has now shifted entirely to the next Mass Effect as their current project. While Epler won’t divulge anything about it, he does weigh in on whether BioWare would take another crack at multiplayer. “It’s possible to tell a strong story in a multiplayer game. Final Fantasy XIV does an excellent job,” he says. “Multiplayer also introduces some complications around world states. I make a giant choice in my world, and the world changes.” For games like Dragon Age, the consequences of a player’s choice are intended to impact the narrative moving forward, but for a multiplayer game, it isn’t quite as simple. For example, one player could choose to save a certain person from their fate while another could do the opposite. “It’s funny, because the games I play the most on my personal time are actually multiplayer games,” he says. “But when it comes to crafting these worlds and crafting the experiences, I love the focus that single-player can give you.” Epler also comments on the possibility of some sort of Dragon Age collection, similar to the Mass Effect Legendary Collection that updated the original games for modern consoles in 2021. Having been at Bioware since the first Dragon Age game back in 2009, he would love to see a collection come together, but remastering the first three games in the series would be challenging as they were originally designed using EA’s proprietary game engines. The first two used their own custom Eclipse Engine while Inquisition used Frostbite, a platform famously used to build the Battlefield games. The Mass Effect trilogy, on the other hand, used Unreal Engine, a more flexible and widely popular engine used in game development, which made the remastering process much easier for the Legendary Collection. “I think I’m one of about maybe 20 people left at BioWare who’s actually used Eclipse,” Epler says. “It’s something that’s not going to be as easy Mass Effect, but we do love the original games. Never say never, I guess that’s what it comes down to.” Shifting focus from multiplayer integration to fleshing out the solo narrative ultimately allowed BioWare to finally get The Veilguard to the finish line. “Once [the companions] become the core, all the other pieces start falling into place,” he says. “Statistically, a lot of people just take the first two companions they meet, and that’s their party for the rest of the game. I would say for The Veilguard, try different characters, try different combinations, and get outside your comfort zone.”"
[source]
Rolling Stone interview with John Epler: '‘Dragon Age: The Veilguard’ Is Bioware’s Best Game in Ages. Here’s How They Got There'
Veteran Bioware creative director John Epler looks back on the lessons learned from the studio's failed multiplayer game
Some key excerpts:
"BioWare confirms that there are currently no plans for downloadable expansions" for DA:TV
The devs' "full attention has now shifted entirely to the next Mass Effect as their current project"
[source]
#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: dreadwolf#dragon age 4#the dread wolf rises#da4#dragon age#bioware#video games#mass effect#next mass effect#long post#longpost#mass effect: andromeda#anthem
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TRUTH SERUM + What do you think of Dess and Noelle liking creepypastas?
Send “ Truth Serum + [ a question ] ” and Rudy has to answer truthfully.
Sounds like a big regret...
#reindeer games [ ic memes answered ]#grey guy [ anons interact ]#eldest adventurous doe [ december ]#youngest softest doe [ noelle ]#ooc: nonnie! this is such a great ask! *shakes you*#made me look back at the sweepstakes secret pages#and think about their parents perspective of it would be#kinda hints at why dess ~might have~ gone missing#i dont think rudy and carol knew about their daughters watching horror movies together#it was like a ~hide under the blankets and be quiet so mom and dad dont wake up~ kind of thing#but their ~creepy stuff~ chatter wouldnt go unnoticed by either parent#like the ~ice-e box is winking at me~ thing#theyre just... being kids. acting their age#okay now im just rambling...xd
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Okay I’m probably overthinking way too much about this but you every notice when bill get mad he turns red but when he makes deals and tries to be friendly he uses a blue flame what if this could tie back to his parents 🤯🤯
#gravity falls#bill cipher#the book of bill#the book of bill spoilers#like I know red is angry blah blah blah but still think about it#it’s interesting how he would use those colors#every since the shit about him drawing the blue and red triangle in therapy I’m just going back and thinking about everything#like every scene he’s using either blue or red when he is not in the default and now we know his parents are those colors#like it makes me go 🤨🤨#I feel like my perspective on this goofy ass little triangle has completely changed#I’m psychoanalying everything
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idk it sounds reasonable to me for a teenager to run away bc they didn't want to eat their veggies!
one hopes that by the later stages of childhood a parent will have figured out which veggies and preparation styles work for the kid, and the kid will have resigned themself to what they do and don't have to eat according to their parents, and it's all settled into an equilibrium instead of a daily fight. and hopefully as a teen your palette is expanding and you're even willing to eat more veggies then you did as a child.
however, if the kid is extra picky and stubborn, and the parent is extra determined to make sure they eat a good variety (or just eat whatever the parent prepared no matter what it is), it could absolutely continue to be a regularly-repeated fight. and if something is a continued point of contention throughout childhood then it absolutely makes sense for a teen to go FUCK this, i am nearly an ADULT i am done being told to eat my veggies i am gonna prove my independence and make them realize i don't have to just sit there and let them boss me around!!
like, the childishness of the fight is exactly why a teen would run away about it.
#i'm so picky and only got pickier throughout my teen years#i usually just made myself a separate quick meal when i didn't like dinner#if my parents hadn't let me and had tried to insist i eat the same thing as everyone else?#well. idk what i woulda done bc that would require they have an entirely different parenting style overall.#so who knows what kind of person i would be lol#but leaving the house for a couple hours seems pretty reasonable to me#but it's also normal for a parent to have an 'everyone sits at the table and eats what i've prepared' rule#for a variety of reasons ranging from well-meaning to self-centered#and i'm sure there are parents who will even try to foist the same old veggie rules upon adult children visiting for the holiday#i think 'what's the latest age at which a veggie fight might occur' says more about the parents than the kid#since they're the one turning it into a fight instead of letting it go#so ig if you want them to be closer to model parents then sif would have to be pretty young#but i think 'the type of parent to never stop arguing about veggies' is an interesting flaw to add#to make a parent who is loving and wonderful overall but has their own blind spots and mixed up priorities#isat spoilers#isat#siffrin#I UNDERSTAND WHY people think sif must be young and i'm fine w that#this is just my perspective :)#thoughts about siffrin#thoughts
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I love the way Dorian and Ashton both talk to the Arch Heart.
Because Ashton is hell bent on dragging them down to their level. Ashton wants every bastard with a superiority complex to feel a boot on the neck for just a moment. It doesn't matter if that person has more money, more magic, or infinite power. They would be no where without the people they're standing on. The workers they exploit, the libraries they study, the worship they receive. All that power comes from the collective, the little guy. And Ashton wants all of them to come down to earth and fucking see who they've been using for the first time.
While Dorian is still stuck on the narrative that mortals are their children. You don't give birth to things that are not of you, or are completely different than you. Dorian keeps hearing "we're like you". He keeps hearing about the fear of mortality and the bonds of family. He knows that the gods and mortals are the same. And he's hell bent on reminding them that they are equals. If they weren't the same species: how could they come so close to godhood? How could a mortal become a god? Dorian speaks to the gods with no reverence, no policing of his tone. Because as they sit at the Arch Heart's table, with fake food and fake wood and fake bounty, they are equals. They are both in the same position. Dorian Storm does not think himself a god. He just knows the Gods are the same as them. Him and the Arch Heart both create and revel in beauty. Of course one gave to the other. But everyone must have a teacher. And there will always come a time where the teacher and the student can play a duet in such harmony no one can decipher who once taught who.
#silver sending stones#cr spoilers#cr 3 e 107#dorian storm#ashton greymoore#i wanted yo say more about dorian thinking they equals but my prose will always be purple#but i really do thing dorian thinks theyre equals#he speaks to them like he think thwyre equals#and again i dont think dorian thinks hes a god.#he saw a fucked up family trying to save themselves and he related#because the gods. if we are to look at it from their perspective. were defending themselves.#would we blame other people for trying to protect themselves?#the answer is yes we would blame them#but also nauce cant be that dead#ANYWAYS. the point of that all is that i think dorian thinks theyre all on the same level#like a teacher and a student#a parent and a child#because there will always come a time where you are forced to see your parents as just a man or just a woman.#and i think dorian is there#dorian is seeing his celestial parents as just people.#powerful people sure#but just. people.
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dude assad zaman is a good actor. did u guys know this
#assad zaman#just watched the national theatre's east is east recording!!! epic#i need to see if the other production of east is east that assad was in was recorded cuz he was saleem in that one#and abdul and saleem are two quite different characters in relation to the themes of the story#something very poetic about him first playing the art kid middle child who readily rejects his dad&heritage#as soon as he's given reason to#and then going on to play the current eldest child in the family who just cant stop empathising with his parents#and yearning for his home as his only source of genuine community and acceptance#like as much as saleem's view is valid (he comes to these conclusions after his dad beats him)#his black and white thinking of rejecting his dad and therefore rejecting his pakistani heritage as a whole is immature#and yeah abdul's perspective is its own kind of immaturity. but it's also distinctly more grown up#because it's exactly what someone who has gone out and seen the world and been ostracised by it would feel#about his emotionally abusive but still familiar&comforting home life#anyway how does this relate to assad zaman. oh yea there's an interesting duality in the roles#i wanna see how he plays saleem after having seen how he plays abdul#thunder rambles
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Imagine you're Mr. Wu and your weird gay daughter runs away in tears after destroying some unespecified object while yelling about you ruining her life. Because you told her you'd be moving to another state. This is the last time you see your daughter in half a year, and when she comes back, she comes back... wrong. She's wearing a light leather armor, a fur-lined cape, and a green flower crown. She has two long scars, one alongside her spine and the other along her chest, the tissue around them covered in burn scars. Doctors say she shouldn't have survived. Doctors say she didn't. Yet she's right here, in front of you, hospital gown clinging to her small, fragile, trembling frame. She fidgets with her hands. Getting her to stay still has always been difficult, but now it seems impossible. She won't let go of her phone. She's always texting her two friends. When you take it away, she gets anxious. You always knew those damn phones cause kids to act weird, but your kid having a panic attack seems too extreme, even for her. Then again, she's always been odd. Nowadays, she wakes up crying and screaming almost every night, and you realize she's been stealing her phone from your bedside drawer every night to text her friends, returning it before you wake up. You catch her once and decide to give her that damn phone back. It's the only thing that calms her down, as if she were a baby with a pacifier. She spends her last weeks in LA clinging to her friends, having sleepovers and playing her weird board games with them. Everytime they drop her back at her house, there's an excessive amount of hugs and tears. But the moments when they call her, or when she leaves to meet with them, or when they show up at their door to pick her up... those are the only moments in which you see her happy. One of her friends, the rude and disobedient one, came back with a big scar on her face. She's been acting a lot nicer, though. The other one too. She acts a great deal more adult now. You doesn't know what happened or where your daughter went. She won't tell you. But you can tell this friendship is the only thing keeping her afloat right now. Maybe you know, deep down, that no one else would understand.
And then you decide to move anyway because fuck her amirite
#amphibia#marcy wu#my posts#so like what if marcy moving away was a proper tragedy#what if things were WORSE for her#what if *smashes marcy with a ROCK*#i realized that.#despite my parents being shitty (just found out literaly today my mom had doctors give me the wrong treatment because she assumed my body#would react the same way as hers. instead of doing what literally every doctor told her to do. now i need to get it fixed)#they still asked me how I felt about moving away to a different province when in like. 8.#like. oh right. this is something parents generally ask their kids about. instead of uprooting their entire lives out of nowhere.#marcy's situation is complicated in a narrative sense because#in order for her arc to work her departure must be dictated by morally neutral forces outside of her control#but her parents' decision seems very shitty with the context we're given. you COULD give context that justified their actions#i.e have them explain that they really do need this if they want marcy to go to college or some shit like that#but then it stops being Marcy vs. Forces of Nature#and it becomes Marcy vs. Her Dad (and she has to accept he's right in this one)#the show is clearly for a Marcy vs. Forces of Nature conflict (in this case it's the inevitability of change)#and in order to keep the antagonistic force abstract you CAN'T have her dad be a proper character#BUT. as a consequence -> Marcy has to give into the ''#the ''natural order'' which would be accepting her parents' power over her as natural and inevitable#it's not even like... accepting her parents are right or anything. just that their o#that their complete control of the situation and marcy's total powerlessness is natural and inevitable#and that's tragic! from a more watsonian ñerspective#perspective* : Marcy is sent back to her shitty parents and she just needs to learn how to deal with it away from her support system#the solution imo would have been to change the motivation behind her family moving away so that it's outside her parents' control too#it really has to be completely inevitable. i can't think of an alternative reason but it's just what it#it's what would fix this problem imo#it's a simple fix really
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the boy-but-not-that-way-ism of riz gukgak send tweet
#not art#have been chipping away at a more... proper? so to say. piece of the kids for keepsake. and since its of them at the beach Im rotating#gender stuff in brain again. riz and gorgug ping a lot of the like funny gender stuff in my brain#very specifically adjacent to cultural understanding of it all... like I did say I do think riz has a gender and it can be#translated to ''man'' in solesian understanding but also that boy has close to no self awareness nor does he want to#he grew up as ''goblin'' before ''boy'' and it's kinda how he perceives himself. got a gender but doesn't wanna do much with it#kinda imagining him seeing his grandparents again and realizing that there's a gap there between himself and his grandpa too#and sitting with that for a bit. not for long that kid doesnt do that but for just a little bit#man I truly really do love that riz is aroace. my boy of the unquantifiable unimportant margins....#gorgug though is 100% trans lmao. there's a kinda distance to his own body in how he acts#that's kinda common in ''mad scientist'' characters? (or maybe my perspective's just skewed due to willow jenkins lmao)#kid spent the first two seasons fitting himself in places he Should be able to fit. and s3 is pretty much all about him Making New Spaces#thing is despite looking ardently for like. the reason Why he can't fit in in the first season I think gorgug really does#love his gnome parents and love being their child. and its confusing and tough to have to learn why something you love still hurts you#he wants it to not. he wants to make sense. and then it does and it changes nothing really#until he actively makes choices based on what he's learned. like. damn idk how to word it but#just like the ability to say ''actually this Is my life what are u gonna do? stop me from living it?'' is a powerful force#its rly fun to look at these two guys in these contexts thats like#they will never win the gender game just by virtue of being who they are. it's not designed for folks like them to win#but riz would simply not play and gorgug would design his Own game he's the champion of. and I think that rules
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Thinking of tiny Enver, following helplessly along as he's dragged through the streets by a strong, unrelenting grip. It was the middle of the night when the warlock came for him, darkening the Flymm's doorstep. The only time his mother made a fuss when they handed over their son, sparking a light of hope in Enver's heart that they might've changed their mind, was to ask the warlock if he'd counted the amount of gold correctly. After that they were right as rain.
As the trade concluded his mother never looked at him once.
The moment the door to Flymm's Cobblers closed shut behind them with a sense of finality, his fate well and truly sealed, Enver Flymm's mind was running miles a minute. Thoughts of escape had occurred to him, of course, but even if he were to manage to overpower a warlock twice his size and make a run for it, where would he go? His parents just sold him. If he went back they'd kick him right out the door again, screaming and yelling over what he'd done. He turns his options around in his head repeatedly, but he can't think well when his heart is trying to jump its way up his throat.
They're halfway through the Lower City when the grip on his arm suddenly loosens. He could barely hear a thing at first - the city uncharacteristically quiet even for such late hours. Then, there is a sickening squelch followed by a slight thud as the warlock drops dead to the ground. He sees the vague silhouette of someone on top of the body, a smaller creature dripping with blood as it tears through flesh. It's too dark to see a face, but there is something animalistic about its movements. Either it doesn't notice Enver, or it doesn't care.
Whoever or whatever wild thing it was is gone just as fast. By some God's mercy, it passed right by him.
Enver is left alone with the mangled remains of the man who bought him, whose pockets he rifles through for gold and valuables before disappearing from the scene of the crime. Without a home he has to put his mind to work living on the streets, toiling and climbing his way steadily up so as not to ever be so powerless again. It's not a way of life that comes without soiling your hands, but sometimes the messiest deeds are the cleanest, and vice versa. Stabbed backs and broken souls are left behind in the process when you need a stepping stone or two. He will rob as many people of their freedom as necessary to preserve his own because a miracle like that will never happen again. Even so he is admired. Respected. The people of Baldur's Gate support him now in a way they never would have before.
Years pass but it's impossible to forget what granted him this chance to forge connections and climb his way up to become unreachable in the first place. However oblivious it might have been back then that murderous creature freed him, and while there is little to go on in terms of finding it again he'll never forget the debt he owes.
(It grows into an obsession.)
#bg3#enver gortash#durgetash#softer!enver because he never reached the Hells but still a fucked up enver#I am thinking about it....#it's like a fucked up version of cinderella#maybe durge dropped something as they left. maybe enver held on to it for all these years as he searched for them :)#didn't mean for this to get long I ended up vomiting words#but boy am I thinking about this alternate way of meeting each other.....#they only met once and never so much as spoke a word to each other but durge already means the world to gort#enver calling durge 'it' at first because he's truly not sure if they're even human or not. but he MUST find them again.#from durge's perspective I'm thinking this was one of their 'lost to the urge' moments and they weren't even aware of enver standing there#a what-if gort never ended up in raphael's hands scenario. would raphael still persist? I think so#but I think gorty could come up with a few ways to stay out of his clutches without parents there to kick him under the bus#if this already exists I want the link sent to me yesterday
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re: s5 episodes 6 and 7
going into watching the x files, one of the very few things i knew about, because i had consulted my best friend wikipedia, was the emily plotline. i knew it was coming, so in a way it felt inevitable, and my reaction to finally reaching it was approached from the in-universe knowledge that this was how it would be from the start.
but now that i read the notes on my liveblog post, i think about how i would have interpreted the episode if i had not known that fact, or had i been a contemporary viewer. i think i would have also felt frustrated that they decided to give the female lead a baby over two episodes and then kill her off and act like nothing happened. i think i would be frustrated with that, especially when i have other, existing complaints about the way women are treated in this show. how once again the plotline, from its very core, revolves around removal of scully's reproductive agency. and i think that rings even more true nowadays.
it's interesting to imagine my reaction had i not known it was coming. because the foreshadowing was there, what with the abduction plotline and the clones and the earlier babies in tubes and hybridizations and blah blah blah. but i guess i would have thought (or hoped) it was handled in a different fashion.
we'll never really know what my first thoughts would have been had i not known what was eventually going to happen, but hearing your thoughts from seeing it is making me ponder.
#i will not pretend to understand the emotions a parent feels towards their child#in fact i frankly cannot comprehend them#so keep that in mind when we take this with a doylist rather than a watsonian view#but there is this weird sticky feeling from it being her the child belongs to and her the narrative is about children from#i mean it would make so much more sense from a plot perspective for it to be mulder who has the bastard alien baby#think of how desperately that man craves a family and how aliens have already ruined what he had#just thematically it makes more logical sense#but scully is the woman and the woman has the baby. for all women want baby and this is law /s#my feelings on the matter are complex. in no way do i think it “compromises” her character to have a child and love her#i just wonder if the writers in the room were also thinking that way or were thinking very black and white#yes. woman = want baby. make storyline about baby. and lack thereof. for 5 seasons.#i could probably word this better at some point but i have been thinking about it a lot since then#and want to continue to hear your thoughts!#the x files#txf
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Can we all collectively start to view parents who post online about the "fuck-ups" their child did as what it is - abusive? I genuinely do not care about the "reason" somebody has for posting their child on the internet, if it can be "solved" in the public court of shame and humiliation, it can be solved in a home that should love them.
Public humiliation is not an appropriate response to a child being a child. If your first line of defense is airing out your dirty laundry to millions of strangers, you are at best not mature enough to be a parent, and at worst, you are completely abusive and should not be a parent, and both options are pretty grim.
#abuse#abuse tw#youth liberation#saw somebody say that the most evil people they know are parents and... yeah. no fucking wonder that person said that#i'm sorry i get that being a parent is hard. i think it is an amazing feat in fact.#but i have so much scorn for parents who decide to leave the parenting to bullies and directly put their children in harm's way#NOWHERE in parenting does it require you to stop parenting and instead go 'well let's have billy bob bully you into submission'#NOWHERE in parenting does it say it's appropriate to gain clout off your kid making kid-level fuck-ups#start treating your children like human beings or i'm going to start biting#if you ever want to know what it's like to be a parent and have your kid block your number and never talk to you - come speak with me#i was the kid who blocked my abusive parent's number completely. i never speak to them. i do not have a nice thing to say to them.#if you would like that to be your future then you are not in the headspace to be a parent#kid's fuck-ups are typically significantly less of a fuck-up than what some of y'all adults do as a fuck-up#so it's like... gain some perspective about what the cost is and what the 'reward' is
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well mark that down as situation 2938489 that I don't know how to handle
#i would love advice on this if y'all have any thoughts to share because i know what my parents think and im having trouble sorting it out#i love these three friends of mine but it is really draining to be around them now because all they will talk about is church drama#(re: our old church) and rehashing it all and being Outraged about the horrors etc etc#either that or being downright condescending about protestants/non denominations and acting like it's funny to talk like that all the time#i end up being more angry or resentful or exasperated at the end of our conversations than glad and at peace like i did before#(before all THIS ish happened and the three of them were like okay this is all we're going to talk about now)#i've tried to say in gentle ways (i am simply not capable of this kind of blunt confrontation) that maybe we should not be talking#so uncharitably towards other people especially behind their backs. like. yes bad things happened. we have to acknowledge that.#but continually making jokes and jibes at a priest's expense really rubs me the wrong way especially since i KNOW that he loves us#and in many ways was trying his best in the circumstances. and are we not supposed to be loving our neighbour#and is this not downright slander to keep going on this way esp since it goes on for HOURS at a time#anyway i don't know what to DO because if i keep chatting with them/meeting up with them conversation will be 90% this thing and i Hate It#but on the other hand i feel responsibility towards them because my godson's one of them and another is a friend who is a fairly recent#convert and if i leave them to stew in their own echo chamber i doubt it'll do them good#am i supposed to keep some distance? am i supposed to keep arguing whenever one of them says something unkind or inflammatory?#am i supposed to keep speaking up so that they hear a different perspective? am i supposed to run in the other direction for my own peace o#mind? anyway i am still thinking this over and it stresses me OUT#it used to be fun and life giving to be around these people and now it is so exhausting and seriously alarming in many ways
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every day i kick a rock and bash my head into the wall because i'll never get to go on a big space adventure and become tightly close-knit with my new found family up there <//3
#re lrb..........#i mean realistically if i was in the voltron/quintenary stars universe chances are i would probably NOT be one of the people#going on the space adventure.#i'd be roped into the plot when the aliens invade and earth almost gets destroyed. spoilers for arc 2 btw sorry#but man. child soldierism aside i wish that were me so so so bad#sadly kicks a rock when will EYE have a deep and mystical connection with a giant ancient cat :(#its not even that i want to interact with the main cast bc i dont really i just. wanna be in their position man#i think one of the reasons why voltron grabbed me so hard (among MANY) is how badly i wanted to do what the main characters did#i remember when i was first watching it while it was coming out i would CONSISTENTLY daydream about being launched into space#with a handful of other people and having to fight a war and grow up far away from home and all the suffocating stuff that came with it#and then coming back years later already solidly knowing who i am and being confident in that#so i'd actually be brave enough to be unapologetic about it. and i'd be found family with the people i went to space with also#that parts important#idk man just. i dont like saying i was abused when i was younger because i really dont think it was like that and it isnt even close to#what how people who have really been abused have had to go through#but sometimes i really do wonder. like now that im (mostly) out and able to review everything with an outside perspective#not even getting into the cult survivorism stuff this is JUST family dynamics im talking about here#bc that shit is a whole other can of worms#i think my parents were genuinely doing the best they could with the cards they were dealt but. jesus christ.#i would have given ANYTHING to be able to run away from all that. and throw magic cats into the equation? brother im GONE#anyway this tags ramble has derailed in a MAJOR way. tldr i wanted to be a paladin sooooo fuckign bad bro#like it actually makes me SICK how much i want a lion. red you are my forever girl even if only in my heart <///3#i still do want to do all that out of principle but its not as desperate now i just really love space and really want a big kitty friend#winter speaks
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