#and they chose them themselves and i wanted to cry and i am wearing them now and i love them so much bc they remind me im not alone

[a-dash-in-the-middle]

i actually do like jewellery as a gift bc when i wear it i feel like i have a part of the people who gifted it with me

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

A silly thought I had 👀

What about Rook begging Auron to go on a zoo or aquarium date and after like a week of asking he reluctantly agrees

BUT THEN they go and it goes great until they do one of those things where you hold an animal (or for an aquarium; a touch tank) and he freaks out internally cause he doesn’t know what to do and then what happens next to is up to you 😋

Aquarium date!

"Please can we go to the Aquarium??" Begging with puppy dog eyes Rook was leaning on Auron's bed. Both were enjoying time together when Rook got a date idea, but Auron was a bit iffy on it. He had some bad memories there, like a hermit crab crawled on his had when younger and he cried. His mom took almost half an hour to calm him down, so yeah he kinda didn't want to go there. Auron didn't know how to tell them this because it was really, really embarrassing, but they never really chose where the date is so he agreed to make them happy.

"I don't see why not. Let's do it Friday, is that okay with you?" The red head already knew it was okay with them, he knew their schedule and everything they do in a week. Rook smiled wide and leaned over to kiss Auron all over his face while saying "Thank you!" Over and over again.

Now fast forward top Friday, Auron was wearing something causal for this date. But Rook always said he doesn't have causal in his vocabulary and his definition is very different compared to others. But hopefully he wasn't over dressed, his thinking was cut short by Rook tapping his shoulder. He turned to greet his partner, he was picking them up from their apartment and gave them a chaste kiss.

"Are you ready, dear?" Getting confirmation from his lover he gave the chauffeur the signal to drive. It was 11 am so they can be the first few people to get there so they don't get interrupted by children. On the way there the couple were talking about their day, mostly Rook since they had things to do in the morning starting at 6 am.

"And the lady just glared at me like I caused her to slip! I was trying to warn her that there was a paper on the floor." Huffing Rook looked out the window for a moment to ease themselves. "Oh! We're here! This is going to be so fun!" Excitingly chirping as they turned to look at Auron. Their smile made him smile, yeah maybe ding this won't be so bad for him. As long as their happy with this date that's all that matters to him.

"I hope so, there's lots of sea creatures to look at here. It was newly opened last month." Of course when Rook asked to go to this specific aquarium he looked into it to see if it was good or just claimed to be so. He was pleased to find that it was, there is many exhibits you can go to here. There was even some penguins here, it was a good idea to put the aquarium almost in he center of the city, lots of foot traffic.

Getting the tickets were easy, walking into the aquarium was interesting to do. There seemed to be some schools here for a trip for the children, shrugging that off Auron looked at Rook as they skimmed the map they got form one of the workers where to go to.

"hhmm, where should we go? Auron is there anything that catches your interest?" Questioning as they kept their eyes on the map. Auron looked and saw a shark tank, turtles, penguins, coral reef and even the touch tank.

"How about the penguins?" Rook nodded and wrapped their arm around Auron's. Both smiling from the simple contact and walked to the exhibit they agreed on. Seeing penguins in person was really interesting, watching them dive in to the water, doing small tricks for fish and Rook even got to feed one. They clapped excitedly when the small penguin 'Rock' took it, it even let them pet it a bit!

"Auron oh my god that was so cool! And Rock was so cute I'm going to cry." Gushing about the penguins Auron smiled as they walked to the next exhibit, the shark tank. "Wow that's a big shark." Rook looked in awe at the Coral Cat shark the aquarium had.

They both watched the shark a bit before Rook "Wanna go somewhere else? I think there's a touch tank somewhere?" Hesitantly saying as Rook looked back at the map to confirm yes, there was one. Auron froze a bit and was thinking about his memory before seeing Rook look up to him waiting for an answer.

"Anything you want, dear." Rook gave him a suspicious look but decided not to pry. Both walked in arms Rook pointed at the many tanks they passed going to the touch tank. They ended up hearing a lot of laughter as people touched random animals that were okay to feel.

"Oh I always wanted to touch a hermit crab! Oh I hope they have some bamboo sharks. They are so cute!" Auron nodded as he looked slightly uncomfortable to be there, but got his shit together when Rook came up to the side of a touch tank and marveled at the animals in it. Slowly they let their hands in and lightly pet a hermit crab, "This is so weird!" Giggling as they continued Auron slowly came next to them.

"Hey Auron, are...you okay?" Rook decided to bite the bullet and ask their partner. Auron went to open his mouth to slightly lie but Rook gave him a look that said 'tell me the truth, please.' and he sighed.

"I don;t have the fondest memories of it. Where I was like 6 I cried bc a hermit crab touched me." Looking away in slight shame but Rook asked for him to look at them.

"It's okay if you don't wanna be here, this is a date for both of us. If your not comfortable I'm not. Lets go to a different part of the aquarium then." Taking out the map Rook was trying to find something that Auron would like. Seeing Rook do this made him fall a bit more in love with them, and because of that he decided something.

"I think I want to touch one, animal from here." Saying as he turned back to the touch tank, Rook paused and looked at him.

"Are you sure?" Getting a look in return they giggled and nodded, "Okay then, what do you wanna touch?" Auron looked and saw a hermit crab, seeing how small it was he was sure it would do anything if he touched it lightly. And so he did, it felt a little weird kinda reminding him of that memory when younger but, he didn't freak out. Was just a bit discomforted, the little creature simply stood there not doing a lot and Auron took his hand away.

"Okay now I see how silly it was to be scared of this hermit crab I guess." The red head said then turn to Rook, "Wanna go some where else now?" Rook nodded then pointed to one part of the Aquarium map. Seeing where it was Auron smiled, "Sure Rook let's go see the jelly fish." Locking arms once again, the couple enjoyed the rest of their date.

[adrienneleclerc]

Hi, I was wondering if you could make a Xavier or Ajax x reader fic where it's the reader's Quinceañera and she ask Xavier or Ajax to be her chambelan.

That’s adorable!!!!! For my quinceañera, I had my brother be my escort, 0 chambelanes. But for my cousins quinceañera, they would have like 4 chambelanes to do the dance and what not. The reader is going to ask Ajax to be her chambelan. And this way I can get used to writing for Ajax because Ajax doesn’t have much fanfics so if you have any more Ajax requests, send them!

Quinceañera

Pairing: Ajax Petropolus x Platonic Hispanic!Reader

Summary: Y/N is having a quinceañera: Y/N didn’t want chambelanes, her mom wanted Y/N’s cousins to be chambelanes, so they compromised and her mom let Y/N choose who would be her chambelanes.

A/N: I AM SO SORRY THAT IT TOOK SO LONG TO FINISH THIS!! It was originally supposed to be asking both of them but after being on twitter, it will just be Ajax.

Y/N was in kitchen table with her mom going over the plans for the Quinceañera.

“Mi vida, i know you already invited your friends from Nevermore pero mija, te falta escoger tu chambelán!” Y/N’s mom said.

“Cuando me regresas a escuela, I’ll ask Ajax if he wants to be my chambelán, I already agreed to do a dance, it has to be Ajax or I’m walking alone.” Y/N said.

“Okay fine, ask your noviecito, but you have to waltz with your cousins and your tíos as well as your dad.” Y/N’s mom said.

“Está bien, me llevas a escuela?” Y/N asked.

“Yeah, get your bag.” Y/N’s mom said. On the car ride back to Nevermore, Y/N’s mom was calling people to finalize the flower arrangements, the DJ, catering, the venue, and the dress to pick it up. Y/N’s mom got through the gates of Nevermore and stopped the car. “Also please teach them to waltz! You chose ‘this is love’ from the freaking Cinderella movie so you’re dancing that with your boyfriend, you’re dancing ‘no crezcas más’ with your dad, and ‘perfect’ by Ed Sheeran with your tíos, primos, and brother (which is something that actually happened and now Perfect gives me “war flashbacks” and “PTSD”).

“Está bien, mami. Te aviso quienes son para comprar el chaleco y corbata que combinen con el vestido (okay, mom. I’ll let you know what he says so we can buy the tie and vest that match the dress). I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Y/N said, leaving the car. She went to their dorm that she shared with Enid and Wednesday.

“There you are! How was your day with your mom? Are you guys almost finished planning the quinceañera? What dress should I wear?” Enid was asking Y/N.

“A cocktail dress would be great, Enid, my dress will be (your favorite color) so don’t choose that color and you should be fine.” Y/N said,

“I remember mi quinceañera, my dress was all black and my father was crying when he gave a speech, all the relatives came, my parents certainly enjoyed themselves.” Wednesday said.

“That’s good, I have to choose a chambelán because my mom wants me to have an escort so I’m going to ask Ajax.” Y/n said,

“He will say yes because you two are dating, Ajax would do anything for you.” Enid said.

“We’ll see what happens, hopefully he says yes because I don’t want my mom to pick one of my cousins to be my escort.” Y/N said,

The next day it was Monday and everyone was on the quad for breakfast. Y/N ran behind Ajax and jumped on his back (mainly because I’m 5’3) and Ajax shifted a little but held Y/N.

“Good morning, my Little koala, did you need something?” Ajax asked looking at her. Ajax let Y/N down and now she was in front of Ajax and Kent.

“See you later, Ajax.” Kent said as he walked away to catch up with Divina.

“I had something to ask you, amor. Since I’m having a quinceañera, I was wondering if you would like to be my chambelán. My mom wants my ‘cousins’ to be chambelanes but I don’t really like them that much, but I love you and my mom said it was okay if you can be my chambelán! It’s nothing really, we don’t have to do a special dance or anything, just a waltz/slow dance, you’ll have to wear a tie that matches my dress and get fitted for a suit, but other than that…” Y/N was caught off by a kiss from Ajax.

“Sweetheart, relax, i would love to be your chambelán.” Ajax said.

“Papito, you sure you want to?” Y/N asked.

“Of course, mama! I’d do anything for you. When is your quince again?” Ajax asked.

“It’s in two weeks, if you don’t know how to waltz, I’ll teach you, thank you so much.” Y/N said hugging her boyfriend,

“No problem.” Ajax said.

“Perfect, I’ll let my mom know so she can take us to get your suit fitted.” Y/N said and she walked away. Enid then came to talk to Ajax when he talked first.

“Have you met Y/N’s mom?” Ajax asked.

“In passing, she seems nice.” Enid said.

After classes, Ajax and Y/N were in the backseat while Y/N’s mom was driving to the men’s warehouse with her purse in the passenger seat. Y/N’s mom was yelling on the phone, which was on the car speaker via Bluetooth.

“A ver, ya le dije que no quería los centros de mesa así!! Deberían tener flores del mismo color que su vestido, luces pequeños, y mariposas. Acaso hizo eso? No verdad! Hablamos más tarde, tengo que ir a la tienda para que el chambelán de Y/N puede medir unos trajes, chau (Look, i already told you that i didn’t want the centerpieces like that! They’re supposed to have flowers the same color as her dress, fairy lights, and butterflies. By any chance did you do that? No, right? We’ll talk later, I have to go to the shop so Y/N’s chambelán can try on and pick out his suit, bye).” Y/N’s mom, Alma, hung up and the car continued playing ���Un Poco De Tu Amor’ by RBD.

“I thought Enid said your mom was nice?” Ajax whispered to Y/N.

“She is!” Y/N said. “Just not that nice on the phone.”

“Okay, we’re here, let’s go.” Alma then unlocked the car so they can get out.

“Yeah my mom picks a lot of fights over the phone (true story) but she’s going to love you, Ajax. Just look at the suits, my mom will probably pick out the suit for you to wear though.” Y/N said, entering the store. They literally had to get out of Jericho. Ajax walked behind her (I am this close to writing an imagine based off the ‘walk ‘em like a dog’ trend on TikTok) and started looking around the store.

“Okay boys, I am either thinking of a black or gray suit with the vest and tie matching the dress of my niña adorada preciosa.” Alma said.

“That sounds good, what color is her dress?” Ajax asked.

“The color is (your favorite color) so you need that color tie and vest. Y/N Can pick them out for you, I’m sure if you ask one of the workers, they’ll help.” Alma said. Ajax began looking at the racks to find their size of suit.

“I Don’t know what my size is.” Ajax said.

“Then we will ask someone to measure you, it’s no problem.” Alma said and she started looking for a worker. “Hi, yes, excuse me, Can you measure him? We’re picking out a suit for a quinceañera.”

“Ay, que maravilloso, de que color es su vestido (marvelous, what color is her dress)?” The worker asked.

“Es ____, usted tiene chalecos y corbatas de ese color, verdad (It’s ____, you have vests and ties in that color, right)?” Alma asked.

“Claro que si lo tenemos, ahorita tomo sus medidas y busco eso para ustedes (of course we do, I’ll take his measurements now and I’ll look for you guys).” The worker said, “okay so you, puppy eyes, i recommend you go through this rack, they are all in your size, hopefully you’ll like the style, I’ll be right back with the vests and ties.” The worker said.

“Puppy eyes?” Ajax asked. Y/N moved closer and look at him in his eyes.

“Aw, you do” Y/N giggled and Ajax blushed. “Maybe I shouldn’t be calling you Papito, I’ll call you perrito now” Y/N giggled and Ajax started tickling her.

“No no no, if I’m calling you, mama, you’re calling me Papito, deal?” Ajax asked.

“Alright, deal.” Y/N said and they kissed.

“Ay, Don’t do that in front of me, soy tu madre, i Don’t need to see that.” Alma said looking at the rack the worker chose for Ajax. Alma then took out a black two-piece suit. “He would look great in this, don’t you think so, mija?”

“Yeah mom, the Black will make the vest and tie pop,” Y/N said. Ajax took the suit until he realized something.

“I need a dress shirt too.” Ajax said. Alma looked for a white one in his size and gave it to him.

“Okay, try it on with corbata y todo, we will look for shoes later, if you are going to be dating my daughter, you need a suit, we get invited to many formal things.” Alma said, handing everything to Ajax. Ajax tried on everything and came out the dressing room, he looked so good.

“I need a little help with the tie though.” Ajax said and Y/N went to him to tie it. “How do you know to tie a tie?”

“I went to a private school when I was younger, uniforms all the time, had to learn. And there it is, a perfect Windsor knot.” Y/N said, Turing him so Ajax could face the mirror.

“Wow, I look good.” Ajax said and Y/N giggled.

“Yeah you do, papito. Now take it off so we can look for dress shoes, my mom will pay for everything.” Y/N said.

“No way, I can’t let your mom do that. I’ll pay.” Ajax said (I know a lot of people Headcanon that Ajax isn’t rich BUT I’m saying he is old money rich, that he comes from the Zafeiriou family, the wealthiest family in all of Greece, they are the equivalent to the Young Family in Crazy Rich Asians. His mom was born a Zafeiriou but married a Petropolus, who’s actually new money)

“Are you sure? I don’t want your parents to be like ‘why are you spending so much money?’ You know?” Y/N said.

“It’s fine, don’t worry. Just let her know.” Ajax said.

“Okay. Mami, dice Ajax que él va a pagar.” Y/N told her mom.

“Okay, great, let’s go look for some shoes for you.” Alma said. They went to the shoe section did their thing, Ajax tried it with the suit pants, it looked good, Ajax paid, and Alma dropped them off at school.

“You think you can teach me how to waltz?” Ajax asked.

“I guess i Can, we’ll practice in your dorm.” Y/N said, they went to his dorm and Y/N played the song that they were going to dance to. “So follow my lead, okay? It’s one, two, three, we either do a box like this.” Y/N demonstratives “or the regular way with one foot change. Think of Belle’s and Beast’s dance.”

“Are you really telling me to think Disney right now?” Ajax asked.

“A little bit. So now let’s try for real.” Y/N said. They were dancing slowly at first so Ajax can get the rhythm down, once he did, they started following the pace of the song. “Wow, Ajax, you’re doing really well.”

“Thank you! Guess I’m a fast learner.” Ajax says as they continue to dance. When the song stopped, they were looking in each other’s eyes and Ajax leaned down and kissed her softly. “Can’t wait to see you on your quince.”

“Me neither.” Y/N says.

The two weeks have passed, Y/N is getting her hair and makeup done at her house by one of her mom’s friends.

“Mami, is the venue set up like you asked?” Y/N asked.

“Of course my darling, your dad is right there with your abuela making sure everything is perfect. Teresa is almost done with your makeup. The hair looks wonderful, Tere,” Alma said.

“Thank you, hope you like It.” Teresa said, giving Y/N the mirror

“I love it.” Y/N said, then Alma helped Y/N get into her dress. Alma drove to the party.

“Stay here for a little bit, Ajax is on his way.” Alma said. Two minutes later, Ajax walked through the door wearing a beanie that matched her dress, Y/N smiled.

“You look beautiful, my love.” Ajax said.

“Thank you, you ready to do this?” Y/N asked.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” Y/N said,

“Damas y caballeros, aplausos para la quinceañera Y/N L/N y su chambelán, el novio, Ajax Petropolus.” The DJ announced and they walked through the doors, everyone staring at them

The DJ played ‘This is Love’ and Ajax and Y/N began to waltz until the song was over. Then she danced with her dad, uncles, and guy cousins until she finally go to sit down and be with Ajax.

“Didn’t realize your family was so big.” Ajax said.

“Yeah, some came from the home country.” Y/N said.

“Wow, they must really love, just like how I love you.” Ajax said, kissing Y/N.

“Thank you for being my chambelán. I wouldn’t know what I would do if you had said no.” Y/N said,

“Keep begging me until I said yes.” Ajax commented.

“I actually would have, yeah.” Y/N said giggling. Then one of her favorite songs played. “Ooh, dance with me? My mom will be bugging me all night if I don’t dance.”

“Anything for you.” Ajax said as he got up to dance with Y/N.

The End

Ajax info: why did Ajax not know is size and why was he buying new formal clothes if he probably has some? Most of his formal events are back in Greece, so all his fancy clothes and suits are in Greece, he doesn’t remember the sizes. Why is he learning how to waltz? Ajax took ballroom dancing classes when he was younger but he doesn’t want Y/N to know that. His parents were married in Greece and moved to Jericho. They are very wealthy gorgons, everyone in Athens knew who and what they were but they were still adored by the public since they have been there for GENERATIONS, making so much money, investing, running companies, Ajax was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but he’s not spoiled or entitled. His parents knew that if Ajax was raised in Greece, he will turn out as bratty as his cousins so they moved to Jericho and now Ajax is the sweet, shy, and sensitive gorgon we all know and love.

Also; my fictional universe for Xavier Thorpe is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT from my fictional universe for Ajax Petropolus x Hispanic!Reader fanfics

[fictionalreads]

Love is Blind Season 4 Episode 4

Zack and Irina

This is awkward. He looks like “fuck I chose wrong” as soon as those doors opened.

This is weird af. They ain’t lasting though the vacation. I’m calling it mnow.

CRINGE I need to fast forward

I am already over them.

They’re so cringe together.

Get the coffee away from Ralphie.

No I’m with her for once. Stop singing. You doing the most.

This pairing is not it. I’m tired of seeing them.

The tatas are out and in danger of flashing someone. I feel like that’s disrespectful. Not the outfit itself but the size of it. She could’ve secured the girls a bit more out of respect for her fiancé and her friends and their fiancés.

That sounds like I’m saying she needs to cover up cause guys can’t control themselves and I’m not. Wear what you want. I’m just saying it felt like she wanted to put on a show for the other people there. If it felt like she was doing it for herself that’s one thing but to put on a show for others when you’re supposed to be committed to someone, is rude to me.

Why is she so into Paul. That’s your bestie’s man. That would be a red flag to me if I was Micah.

If his touch makes you feel gross, end it. Don’t drag him along.

Paul and Micah

She’s just so condescending to me.

Weird.

LMAO I think those are petals not feathers

….brewing potions? LMAO

Kwame and Chelsea

They’re definitely sleeping together the first night.

LOL So in other words you wouldn’t have found her attractive if you met her on the street

An honest conversation. A lot of things you haven’t faced yet cause you’ve been in this bubble. If he had said nothing I wouldn’t have believed him.

I’m glad he brought up him talking to Micah before he went and did it. There’s curiosity there

Chelsea seems fun.

Marshall and Jackie

I can see Marshall not being her type physically.

Where is this coming from?

Damn Marshall I would’ve have guess that was underneath those shirts.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen any of them go beyond the resorts before. Like into town.

What happened with them? They were just good!

Girl what is going on? I’m so confused.

Weird thing to focus on right now but didn’t she just have a green bottle? Where did this blue bottle come from?

Not gonna lie, I feel like I could cry like that at the end of vacations when I realize I gotta go back to work and shit. This is not to make light of what she’s feeling, I’m just saying I get it.

Awe. What a moment. He stayed outside the door waiting for her and then she let him in and he immediately got up and went to her. Are my standards so low that that got to me?

LMAO Jackie being comfortable enough to say ge was fine in front of Marshall.

Brett and Tiffany

I am Tiffany. Tiffany is me. Cause I would’ve been out too.

He got her a bathing suit? How did he get the right size? Did he just tell producers “hey I want to choose a bathing suit can you get the right size?”

Damn he really into her ass. Grabbing it all on camera. I see you boi

….they haven’t?! Could’ve fooled me.

Miscellaneous

God that water looks beautiful.

Does anybody know the song playing at 31:28? The one that’s like “the rains taking a day off?” It sounds like a good song but I can’t find it so if you know the artist or sing please put me on.

It feels like Micah is still flirting with Kwame. Why is she talking about she could’ve chosen him? I’m glad he’s like “we ended up with our right people”

I do see what she’s saying about Chelsea though. I thought she was bitchy at first but then I saw more of her.

LMAO DAAAAMN IRINA TRIED TO BE BITCHY AND IMITATE CHELSEA AND KWAME WAS NOT HAVING IT

Oh. My. God. Irina and Micah are so bitchy.

That was fucked up Micah. Even Brett had a look like “damn that was over the line” I mean I could see if y’all were friends and it had been years since the “breakup” but it’s been a week at most. Chill.

Why is she still all over him? And why is he still talking to her? (Kwame and Micah I mean)

[weabooweedwitch]

Can you understand why you saying 'ok well I guess my only option is to kill myself' is just more of this toxic behavior? In your other posts you were talking about how your mom doesn't deserve basic respect and that you were totally righteous in what you were doing, and when you get called out it's 'I guess I should just kill myself' as if you can't just make better choices? You chose to treat your mom like trash and you can choose in this moment to be a better person. The source of the problem is that you think certain people don't deserve to be treated with respect and you blame others for your own reactions, which are both perspectives you can easily shift if you want to. Just take ownership of yourself, put yourself in others' shoes more and reflect on the issues that cause you to react such as narcissism and borderline. I'm sorry if I'm wrong but it feels like you're acting out the 'cry' part of crybully rather than showing genuine remorse for how you treat people, just so that people will backtrack and comfort you and tell you the things you want to hear, which i'm sure many people will now because attracting enablers through pity is a classical narcissist pattern. Stop looking for an out and face yourself and your flaws and stop using this idea of 'I can't change' as an excuse to just give up because everyone can change if they really want to

I've gone to therapy for years. I've tried different medicine for years. I spent so many trips as a minor being an inpatient doing DBT for years. I've had therapists tell me my mom won't let me set boundaries and she wears me down until I do what she wants. Now I can't stand for myself without getting angry because I'm never listened to. She always told me everyone only sided with me because I lied and manipulated them? But I've never tried to do that? I've never wanted to do that? All I've ever said is how I felt. Have I just been living my entire life not knowing I was am absolute monster?

Have I just been WRONG whenever I felt like someone did something bad to me? Was everything always my fault?

I try to tell people over and over "hey please don't do this, please don't do that, hey, I keep gently reminding you I need XYZ" whether it's at work or home and I just get ignored or talked over or blamed. Even my own fucking managers are leaving sticky cans of energy drinks in my work area, my fucking managers can't even do really basic picking up after themselves when I'm literally the only night employee

I scheduled a day off to try and go with my mom to the dentist and also because I needed to go to the doctor and im only gone 2 days and I come back and everything is not only exactly where I left it, but my work was, undone by someone else shoving everything together, not separating things, literally undoing everything I spent my whole shift doing, and then I have to spend time cleaning up after them, and then I run out of shelves because they didn't work anything out, and then I'm asked "Miranda why didn't you do 5 or 6 pallets on your shift? Why is there still a bag of trash here?" And it won't even be mine

Have I just been secretly incompetent and stupid and pathetic my entire life, even as I was doing my best? Even as I was trying to be a good friend? Even as I've barely held myself together? Was I just actually being a manipulative freak that whole entire time?

Then I don't deserve to be better. I don't deserve for anyone to have sympathy. If I can try and try and nothing I can do is seeming to fix things or impr9ve things or at least help others, then my life is pointless. Then I have no worth.

I didn't even know I was lying to myself this whole entire time

[sillystarpup]

so tired of people crossing my boundaries and being cruel to me when i ask them not to

i wanna be hurt

i don’t want to live anymore

I want someone cruel and fucked up with a possessive saviour and god complex to love me

I want them to chose what I do, say, eat, drink wear.

I want them to make me cry because i don’t like what they are doing to me and I want them to get angry that im not “appreciative” keeping me alive and wrap their hands around my neck and take my air

I want them to only give me air back when they begin to feel worried about me, I want them to force their tongue down my mouth as an apology, to show me that they “love me and care about me.”

I want them to force themselves between my legs because they “want to make me feel good” but also subconsciously because they need me so bad, need me alive for them, need me to stay and be with them that they can’t help but feel the need to be inside of me. I want them to be confused on the boundaries of abuse and love and hurt me, me and me only. I want them to keep me alive even if they have to hurt and abuse me. I want them to protect me. I want to feel both safe and scared when I’m around them. I don’t want to live life anymore, I want to be forced to live it because I feel guilty that they need me to keep calm. I want to feel like they truly do love me in their own fucked up way. I want them to understand things like, knowing to ask before they vent to me, and knowing I have trouble opening up because I’m scared of people since I’ve only been hurt before for opening up. I want to feel safe opening up to them about things because I know it will end in lovebombing and affection even if the affection can be stressful and hurt, I want to become addicted to it to the point where it feels like it doesn’t really hurt me anymore, just stresses me out a little bit and makes me dissociate. I don’t want to be a person anymore. Everyone tells me I am but no on treats me like it. I don’t want to be confused anymore.

I want to understand.

I want to hurt so I understand.

[akirahluching]

My senior high school experience has a special place in my heart. The way I am treated is better, and life is happier even though there is a lot of work in school. You can't think negatively about that because you are not in a toxic community. I am happy with my two years of being a high school student here at Perpetual. My classmates and friends are very happy to be with. They are like family to me. If I had a wish, I would like for time and years not to change and to be with them for a long time. Another good experience I have had is with the teachers. They are not only teachers; they have become my mother and father. They always support me—not only me, but we are all their students. I never once felt lonely because they always talk to me, and when we are sad or struggling, they do their best to help us.

When I was only in junior high school, I received bullies verbally, I was very sad because no one helped me, especially when I was in grade ten, the teachers at my previous school did not care about their students, so I just got used to it until I graduated when I was is in eleventh grade, face to face has started, I had a hard time because I'm not used to making friends anymore, I'm not used to talking to people anymore, but my classmates themselves came to me even though I ignored them because I was shy, they helped me to be their friends and have friends, I didn't study too much when I was in junior high school, I just let my grades pass because I lost interest in studying, but when I moved to Perpetual, I changed. Perpetual has many events that have helped me socialize with people. Because of that, I made new friends and got to show my different talents. I have met different kinds of people in this school, but what is really different are my classmates who cry during grade distribution. At first, I couldn't relate to them because I told myself that it was okay to pass even though my grades weren't high, but as time went on and I got to be with these classmates, I became so infected with them that I became grade conscious. Not as bad as theirs, but it was funny that I've become that student, but if I had not met them, maybe I would not have studied harder than I used to do. For me, it is a blessing that I met them; because of them, my grades increased.

One of the previous things that happened to me was the job interview. I was happy because I met the person who interviewed us. My friends and I cried because the question and our answers were very personal. I learned a lot from this incident because we were not the only ones. Having experienced the interview, it's like we're doing counseling because of what happened, which is very good because we're not only learning from studying; we're also learning life lessons. Lastly, the greatest thing I have ever experienced are my teachers. They increased my confidence. I used to always wear a face mask because I was insecure about my face, but now, look at me—I don't wear a face mask anymore. They are very supportive of me, and they always tell me that I'm beautiful and I don't need to wear a face mask for the rest of my life. Perpetual has changed me. I am very happy that I chose this school. I want to thank all of my teachers, friends, and classmates that I met at this school. I hope you will not forget me, because I will never forget y'all.

[suna-reversed]

Jujutsu Kaisen hcs- “please don’t leave”

alt. title- needy late night moments

Characters- Yuji, Gojo, Sukuna, Megumi

Tags- angst if you squint but mainly fluff

Yuji- 

- You fell asleep on him while watching a horror movie late night. 

- His one hand clutched the popcorn bowl, the other coming around to cradle your head subconsciously as your body slumped over into his side. 

- His main task for the next hour was to not move a single muscle in fear you’d wake up and go inside the bedroom to sleep.

- He’s just been a little touch starved and liked the warmth you were radiating.

- His task proves to be quite difficult considering he was watching a horror movie with jump-scares every two minutes. 

- It takes 5 failed attempts at Yuji trying not to jolt up whenever something pops up for you to finally stir awake, and you find your eyes meeting with the absolutely terror filled ones of your lover.

- “Please don’t leave” he whispers in a voice that makes your heart break. You end up taking that as him being scared of the movie

- Still in a sleepy daze, you crawl over into his lap, affectionately nosing at his neck while his strong arms come around to hold you tightly, 

- “I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here mmkay?” A smile of pure tenderness forms across Yuji’s face, soon enough turning into choking laughter as you sleepily mumble, “I’m ready to throw hands with them dead people”

- “Zombies, babe. They’re zombies.”

- “The only thing they’ll be once I’m done with them is...dead” You slur out that last part, falling back into slumber with a small smile on your face as you feel Yuji shake with silent laughter, his hand coming up to gently pat the back of your head,

- “Thank you baby, I’d throw hands with zombies for you any-day too.”

Gojo Satoru 

- You rolled over in the empty bed for the thousandth time that night. You had learned long before that on most nights you’ll be sleeping without your Satoru.

- So what was different today? Maybe it was the fact that he had informed you of his return. But it had been 2 days since then, and Gojo had never not shown up the same day that he’d told you he was coming back.

- Despite knowing the man you loved was practically undefeatable by most, your mind had considered every single possibility, from him getting captured by a curse to him tripping over and falling into an abandoned sewage line.

- Your stomach churned with anxiety as you considered whether calling Nanami this late to check on Gojo would be a good idea.

- You were halfway into typing his number when you heard the familiar click of the door unlocking, your feet carrying you to the front door faster than your mind could process it.

- And there he was. The bag of sweets he gets you each time in his left hand as he apprehended you with a raised brow and cocky look, 

- “Couldn’t sleep without me sweetheart?”

- He was met with eerie silence as you continued to stare at him. Your sleep deprived mind still processing that he was home. He was safe. 

- Gojo immediately sensed that something was wrong, but before he could react, you were walking towards him, crashing into his arms as he brought his hands around you when-

Thump! 

- Did you just...punch his chest? 

- “I was- I was so scared” you sniffed into his chest. “...you idiot.”

- Gojo’s heart twisted in pain as he heard a sob escape you, his arms tightening around you as he rested his chin on your head. He let you cry it out, gently picking you up and carrying you to the bedroom in midst of you murmuring various swear words at him 

- He finally felt you beginning to calm down as he tucked you in the on your side of the bed. But, as he pulled away, he felt a hand clutch onto his wrist, 

- “Please don’t leave” you said, your voice quivering. 

- “Baby...” he said with a gentle voice, “I’m just going to go change, okay? I’m not going anywhere”

- Even as Gojo changed, he felt your eyes digging into his back like he’d disappear if you let him out of sight for even a moment. 

- He quickly pulled on a pair of sweats, opting to not wear a shirt as he moved into bed with you, your limbs immediately coming to wrap around him. 

- You laid in silence for a while 

- “y/n?” You hummed in acknowledgement, face still buried in his chest

- “I’m always going to come back home to you my love. That’s a promise okay?” 

- You nodded in response, eyes turning glassy once more as Gojo leaned forward to pepper kisses all over your forehead, cheeks, and nose. 

- Gojo lifted his blindfold as he felt your breathing slow down, his ocean eyes filled with utmost adoration as he simply let himself admire your sleeping form. 

Sukuna

- The curse found itself being stuck in its vessel at the most useless of times. - 

- After a late night mission when the brat crashed at your surveillanced apartment, while you completed the formalities and paperwork to submit to Nanami the next morning. 

- Walking out of the guest room, Sukuna found himself amused by your ability to fall asleep in the weirdest of places

- Currently, you sat hunched over the kitchen table, head resting sideways in your arms, tiny snores leaving your mouth as your eyes remained shut. 

- The curse looked back to a few days ago when it had found itself in it’s vessel’s body unwillingly again, a strange warmth curled in his left side. Looking down, he had realised that the strange warmth came from your huddled up body. 

- You had immediately snapped open your eyes and moved away as soon as he had let out a low chuckle. 

- So this time, he approached you carefully. But even then, he had expected you to sense someone’s presence so close next to you. 

- But there was no reaction from you, even as he pulled the chair right next to you and sat down on it.

- “Oi brat”

- Still no response.

- Oh, had you finally let your guard down?

- A dozen different malicious ideas filled Sukuna’s mind, but he found himself simply sitting there, awaiting for a reaction from you. 

- He wondered how you could sleep so comfortably on what was practically a wooden slab. And he found his answer questioned as he curiously leaned down on his own arms, facing you, your noses merely an inch away as he regarded your calm face with a raised brow. 

- He had imagined you to be snarky and biting at him even in your sleep. 

- Why had he imagined you sleeping at all?

- He found himself avoiding the question.

- He stilled as your eyes fluttered open, a cocky smile making it’s way on his lips as he awaited your fear filled eyes. 

- Instead, he found you simply staring back at him, the most of a reaction being you furrowing your brows slightly 

- He didn’t know whether he was a little offended by your lack of response or highly unsettled by your piercing gaze. Nonetheless, he found himself turning his head away, almost in a petty childlike manner. 

- Why did he not get up and leave?

- He felt a hand come to the back of his head, and his senses instantly got ready to go into offensive mode. 

- But this was something much much worse than an attack.

- He found your fingers gently brush over his hair, almost like you were absorbing it’s softness into your fingertips. The breaking point was you gently scratching his head with your nails. He almost purred. 

- But he also found his own hand coming up to grip your wrist, stilling your hand in place.

- “What-are-you-doing?” He emphasised each word as he turned his towards you again, hand still holding yours above his head.

- You continued to stare at him with a look he didn’t quite understand,

- “Your hair is...soft” You slurred your words a little, wiggling your fingers that were trapped in his hand. He let go, only to find you entangling your hand back into his hair, quite shamelessly this time as you closed your eyes once again.

- He didn’t know whether it was the tiredness of that night or simply your sleepiness, but you didn’t acknowledge it the next day. He chose not to either even though he had spent all night thinking of how he’d get to tease you with this.

- But, the king of curses did find himself leaning more towards you whenever you were in his presence. Your hand brushing with his every now and then. Him gently tugging on a strand of hair before tucking it behind your ear and you letting him. Staying right there if he woke up with you on his shoulder while on the train back from a mission. 

- Eventually, you show up to Yuji’s room on a day much similar to the night where you first touched the curse, eyes sunken and shoulders slumped, desperate for any sort of comfort and almost relieved at the fact that he was there. 

- He was taken back as you climbed into the bed, arms wrapping around him, hands going straight to tangle themselves in his hair as you buried your face in his chest.

- “Please don’t leave” 

- He found his own arms pulling you further into him because who was he to deny you when your touch felt so divine? 

Megumi

- Getting a call from Megumi at 2 am after you had just returned from a mission was the last thing you had expected

- Megumi had grown considerably close to you for a boy who didn’t always wear his emotions on his sleeve.

- However, perhaps it was the fact that you had ended up giving him a tiny huge scare by going missing for a few hours on the mission

- It wasn’t anything major, you had gotten injured and accidentally strayed off the path you were ordered to follow

- Nonetheless, the news had reached the school, particularly Megumi, who was halfway out, ready to go and save you from whatever had taken you when the message had come that they had found you unconscious in some corner of the forest. He had only left the infirmary after being assured countless times that you were fine and being pulled away by Yuji.

- Still, he found his mind running and all he wanted was to hear your voice to make sure you were okay.

- He honestly hadn’t expected you to pick up, but he hadn’t known that the nurse had allowed you to go back to your dorm once you woke up.

- So he found himself speechless as he heard your voice

- “...Megumi? Is everything okay?”

- “Yes” he murmured.

- “The nurse told me you were there with me for quite a while…”

- There was a beat of silence before he said,

- “You scared me”

- He immediately hung up after that.

- You knew that it was difficult for him to express such emotions and so you found your feet carrying you to the front of his door

- You weren’t exactly sure of what you were going to do, but you didn’t have to figure that out as the door opened in your face, Megumi gesturing for you to come in.

- As soon as you shut the door, you felt your body being pulled into his warm embrace. You sighed, taking in his familiar scent of night-chilled mist and cedar as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

- You eventually ended up on his bed, limbs tangled with each other under the sheets as he traced random patterns onto your arm to convey the words he couldn’t say, till he fell asleep.

- You found yourself noticing the time, sighing as you got ready to go back to your dorm, but Megumi noticed the slight movement,

- “Angel...” he murmured sleepily, nuzzling his head into your neck, “Please don’t leave.”

- Your heart melted at his words and the consequences of sleeping in another student’s room seemed to fade from your mind as you tightened your grip on him,

- “Never”

[edenmemes]

our flag means death starters

❝ you ever feel trapped, that you’re just treading water, waiting to drown? ❞   ❝ all the revenge, and rage, and anger...it ages you. ❞   ❝ there’s always an escape. ❞   ❝ weeks we’ve been out here with nothing to show for it. ❞   ❝ if you wanted...i could be your family. ❞   ❝ that was a close call, wasn’t it? ❞   ❝ yeah, i’ve heard of you. i’ve heard all about you. ❞   ❝ to think of the ridiculous rumor going around about you. ❞   ❝ what’s on your mind? everything good? ❞   ❝ you almost got us killed. ❞   ❝ i actually thought you were kind of mad at me, if i’m honest. ❞   ❝ no, that’s the worst thing you could do. ❞   ❝ what makes me happy...is you. ❞   ❝ do you know how hard it is to drive a sword through someone’s skull? ❞   ❝ did you hear that? we’re under attack. ❞   ❝ one day, all this will be yours. ❞   ❝ now sheath our swords and sharpen our knives. ❞   ❝ that’s not...is that true? ❞   ❝ this, whatever it is that you’ve become...is a fate worse than death. ❞   ❝ that’s funny. i haven’t heard much about you. ❞   ❝ i, um...i missed you. ❞   ❝ unhand me or bleed. ❞   ❝ chose your next words wisely. ❞   ❝ the point is to rest our bodies...as well as our minds. ❞   ❝ you’re a child with a toy. ❞   ❝ how does one...move past such a thing? ❞   ❝ until you resolve this guilt, you’ll continue to be haunted. ❞   ❝ i wouldn’t take it personal. it’s just that they don’t like you. ❞   ❝ surrender. you have no chance of escape. ❞   ❝ i’ve seen death. i’ve seen the cause of death. it changes you forever. ❞   ❝ this is who i am. can you see me now? you were always gonna realize what i am. ❞   ❝ some men are not built for adventure. some men should concern themselves with gentler things. ❞   ❝ sometime’s a quick death's the best way to end a bad conversation. ❞   ❝ the only good leaders are the ones that hate being leaders. ❞   ❝ stand down now. you’re in over your head. ❞   ❝ here it is. the spoils of battle. ❞   ❝ whatever you're going through right now, it's none of my business. ❞   ❝ the best secret keepers are corpses. ❞   ❝ have you killed anyone recently? ❞   ❝ i understand what it’s like to live in disguise. ❞   ❝ you’re not a ghost, are you? ❞   ❝ you know, i actually thought you’d be dead by now. ❞   ❝ maybe, in your next life, you’ll be a little less nosey, huh? ❞   ❝ ahhh. you’re in love. ❞ ❝ i don’t fit here anymore, do i? ❞   ❝ what are you doing? someone’s going to see you. ❞   ❝ they put a price on your head, remember? ❞       ❝ when you kill, you die as well. ❞ ❝ why’re you hiding your face? ❞   ❝ looks like we’re gonna live after all. for a little while longer, at least. ❞       ❝ i didn’t know this place was haunted. ❞   ❝ it’s always the quiet ones. ❞   ❝ we just can’t seem to stop hurting each other, can we? ❞   ❝ we’re friends. friends tell each other these kind of things. ❞   ❝ i can’t believe you made me do this. ❞   ❝ turn your enemy’s worst fear against them, you’ll own them. ❞   ❝ i will not be trifled with, so don't even think about trifling me. ❞   ❝ still a coward. pathetic. ❞   ❝ listen. i-i thought i was going to lose you. ❞   ❝ you seem to know everything about everything in the whole fucking world. ❞   ❝ here it is. high society in all its grotesque glory. ❞   ❝ i couldn’t help but notice that they got under your skin. ❞   ❝ all their blood’s going to be on your hands. ❞   ❝ what’s happening? am i dead? ❞   ❝ all i’ve been doing is thinking. and drinking. thinking and drinking. ❞   ❝ i just wasn’t built for sitting idle. ❞   ❝ i'm not a good person. ❞   ❝ you’re not a human. you’re a monster. a plague. ❞   ❝ you know what your problem is? you have no idea how to relax. ❞   ❝ sometimes, i think i...i’ve heard you crying. ❞   ❝ we don’t do it because we like it. we do it because we don’t have any other choice. ❞ ❝ it’s not that you deserve it or that you’ve earned it...lord knows you haven’t done that. ❞   ❝ some of us won’t be coming back. others may be wounded. ❞   ❝ look at that. you wear fine things well. ❞   ❝ maybe we can just...get away? start over. reset. ❞   ❝ at some point in a man’s life, he has to face the music. ❞   ❝ do you mind if i sleep in here tonight? ❞   ❝ well, this has been quite a blast, but i’m sure you’re busy with all your things. ❞   ❝ these are my people. i’ll deal with it. ❞   ❝ what’s the scariest thing you’ve ever seen? ❞   ❝ you have any idea who i am? ❞   ❝ you were not raised to kneel, or to turn the other cheek. ❞   ❝ we’re in the middle of nowhere. no one’s gonna recognize you. ❞   ❝ i thought i’d have a cooler death than this. ❞   ❝ we’re gonna have fun today, and that’s an order. ❞   ❝ you can be a real bummer sometimes, you know that? ❞   ❝ i’m gonna try and undo some of the damage from that interaction. ❞   ❝ we are to be lighthouses for each other, remember? ❞   ❝ when you cut lose, you really cut lose. ❞   ❝ this is how you die. ❞   ❝ how does it feel to be in love? ❞   ❝ uh, no. i didn’t hear anything. ❞  

[thelustybraavosimaid]

What the fuck.

Daenerys and Arya share the same values. We know based on this:

"All gods have their instruments, men and women who serve them and help to work their will on earth. The slaves were not crying out to a hundred different gods, as it seemed, but to one god with a hundred different faces...and he was that god's instrument. That very night he chose the most wretched of the slaves, the one who had prayed most earnestly for release, and freed him from his bondage. The first gift had been given."

Arya drew back from him. "He killed the slave?" That did not sound right. "He should have killed the masters!" (Arya II, AFfC)

--

"Unsullied!" Dany galloped before them, her silver-gold braid flying behind her, her bell chiming with every stride. "Slay the Good Masters, slay the soldiers, slay every man who wears a tokar or holds a whip, but harm no child under twelve, and strike the chains off every slave you see." She raised the harpy's fingers in the air...and then she flung the scourge aside. "Freedom!" she sang out. "Dracarys! Dracarys!"

"Dracarys!" they shouted back, the sweetest word she'd ever heard. "Dracarys! Dracarys!" And all around them slavers ran and sobbed and begged and died, and the dusty air was filled with spears and fire. (Daenerys III, ASoS)

There are a lot of ways in which these two leading ladies are similar, but this is my favourite example to make. Another thing to note is that both Arya and Daenerys realise that the system is wrong—and go against the grain. They are criticised for it, demonised for it, by both the world they live in and those outside of it -- the fandom itself.

Sansa and Arya do not have a normal sibling relationship—mind you, I have seven siblings. Pretty sure none of them would make me feel lesser or wish that I would have died instead of their pet if I threw an orange at any of them.

"Go ahead, call me all the names you want," Sansa said airily. "You won't dare when I'm married to Joffrey. You'll have to bow to me and call me Your Grace." She shrieked as Arya flung the orange across the table. It caught her in the middle of the forehead with a wet squish and plopped down into her lap. "You have juice on your face, Your Grace," Arya said. It was running down her nose and stinging her eyes. Sansa wiped it away with a napkin. When she saw what the fruit in her lap had done to her beautiful ivory silk dress, she shrieked again. "You're horrible," she screamed at her sister. "They should have killed you instead of Lady!"

I am pretty sure they would not betray me and say that I have "traitor's blood" because they wish to marry someone. Nor would they, I would hope, after believing I had died...that I was entirely unsatisfactory as a sister.

And to note, none of this has anything to do with shipping with Jon, maybe stop trying to insert Jon in a conversation that deals with *only* Arya and Sansa.

Whether or not Arya and Sansa end up as "friends" is dependent on George. He said that they have a lot to work out, and that the only reason why Sansa exists is to serve as a foil to Arya.

Arya was one of the first characters created. Sansa came about as a total opposite b/c too many of the Stark family members were getting along and familes aren't like that. Thus, Sansa was created; he ended by saying they have deep issues to work out.

[Source]

"Deep issues" does not equal a single heart to heart and everything ends up forgotten and they both are fine. Arya has been bullied and hurt by her older sister and her best friend and made to feel lesser—so much so to the point where she believed that she was a bastard and went to Jon for reassurance. This isn't something that Arya will just get over with a simple apology.

Misogyny is such a bizarre accusation. As far as I know, misogynists would not wish to be with a woman who could take power for themselves by wielding a sword. They prefer trad-femmery. You all consider Arya and Brienne "masculine" for taking part in swordplay, archery, horse-riding, so why exactly would you consider liking Arya—and, by extension, women like Brienne and even Margaery, who loves hawking and horse-riding—an act of misogyny?

[lilacknights]

Obey Me Headcanons: School Field Trip [Part I]

ALTERNATE TITLE: Filipino High School Field Trip Version

CHARACTERS: Gender Neutral MC, Lucifer, Mammon, and Leviathan [The rest of the brothers in Part II (TBA)]

TAGS: @poetofthedyingstars (If any of my Filipino mutuals/followers want to be tagged as well for Filipino content, please let me know in the notes or ask box!)

FOREWORD: I just started the game so I wanted to write something self-indulgent while I get to know the characters more! But since I only started, it might not be the most accurate. I also put 'Filipino High School Version' because this is based on my last experiences in school field trips here in my country and might not be as relatable to other countries (?). Sorry for any typos or grammatical errors, I've been trying to upload this since this morning.

✄ ——————————————————–

MC:

They are the (probably forced) caretaker of everyone in the bus. It's not even talked about, everyone just knew the moment the trip was planned.

Brought bags for, uhm, food exhalation emergencies and extra medicine. They might be demons but MC also knows they're idiots.

Was given a matching neck pillow by Asmo the day prior. 💖

There was no actual plan for seating arrangement made after a small fight yesterday on who gets to sit with MC.

In the end, they get seated around the middle of the bus next to Mammon who let them have the window seat at the start of the trip, with the promise that they exchange seats on the way home.

The group printed out an "I am [MC]." shirt just for the occasion to match with the brothers' "If lost, return to [MC]." version. The shirts will be worn at the final stop in an amusement park.

They had the most fun in said park but was also the most stressed because people actually tapped them and told them that someone with their group t-shirt is puking in one of the rides at least every other hour.

The funniest one was Lucifer who wasn't puking but instead made a child cry and now everyone is judgementally staring at him. Park security also asked for MC because someone (Belphie) fell asleep in the carousel and nobody could get him off. Mammon also fell off the pond swan ride but paid MC to not tell anyone. Beel was seen engulfing a food stall quite literally and staff had no way of stopping him. Satan and Levi got in trouble for fighting with a stall employee about one of the games. Asmo— Nah, Asmo wasn't much of a problem. He was just taking pictures in every nook and cranny of the place, including the bathroom.

It's not even the end of the day but MC is too tired to keep on walking around so they excuse themselves from the group to go back to the bus early and take a nap.

They woke up later from tapping on their shoulder and noticed how dark the sky was outside the window. It was Asmo who woke them up and in his hands was a souvenir keychain from the park that he gave them as a gift. "Good work today~"

When Asmo left, they noticed that there's actually a line down the aisle behind him. Each brother walked to them, giving them a little something they won in a game or bought at the gift shop. All the while also apologizing for what happened earlier.

MC almost cried then and there.

"I love you idiots so much." "Pero putangina niyo talaga. Sayang unli-rides ko."

—————————–

LUCIFER:

The teacher's pet who actively chose to sit in the front row of the bus with either the teacher or the Tour Guide assigned to your class.

Listens and takes note of everything the Tour guide says like a complete tool.

Will only look out the window if the guide points to something, otherwise he's looking ahead at the front window.

Brought a book but quickly realizes he will not get any reading done with the ruckus behind him.

Takes the aisle seat so he can easily look behind his chair and tell the others (read: Mammon) to shut the fuck up.

His favorite stop is the factory tour which he insisted on having. Everyone else was having emotional pain.

He didn't wanna wear the "If lost, return to MC" shirt, but Mammon accidentally spilled slushie all over him and he had no choice. Secretly found it cute and comfortable so he wore it on their trip back home, too.

By the end of the trip and while the bus is bringing them back, he's fast asleep with his head leaned back on his seat, arms crossed. Even Lucifer passes out after babysitting six fully grown men all day in four different locations.

When he wakes up though halfway home, the entire bus is quiet and mostly everyone is asleep but he suddenly had a pillow around his neck and a blanket over him.

Lucifer looked at the tag on the items, finding MC's and Mammon's names in the pillow and blanket, respectively. He couldn't help but smile, peeking behind his seat to find the said duo leaning on each other, 'sleeping'.

'Maybe this trip was actually worth the trouble.', he thought to himself, actually happy for once.

As long as no one mentions the doodling of a dick on his forehead, all is well.

—————————–

MAMMON:

Fought like a child to get the seat next to MC. In the end, the others agreed since no one else had the patience to deal with him.

Geared with hoodies and snacks, as well as a Bluetooth speaker that he never got to use because Lucifer confiscated it.

He was wearing the "If lost, return to MC" shirt from the beginning because no one has faith that he won't get lost.

He did get lost in the first stop, if you're curious. It was a zoo and they found him yelling at a monkey that stole Goldie.

This is that one student who just can't sit still inside the bus. He had to keep walking around and poking people whether or not the bus was moving.

Had probably fallen on his face once or twice whenever the bus driver unexpectedly hits the breaks.

Everyone is mad at him because he kept stealing snacks from each seat. The only one he didn't dare go to was Lucifer.

Insisted on riding every single ride in the amusement park with MC but was only halfway through his dream because they kept getting stopped by someone who needed MC's help with his disaster-prone brothers.

He now regrets suggesting the matching group shirts idea.

Would try to get MC with him on the ferris wheel ride. He succeeded but also miserably failed because his brothers caught ear of his plans and they all suddenly wanna get on the ride, too.

They reached weight capacity and Mammon is one of the people who got kicked out.

At the end, he bought a large yellow bear at the gift shop for MC after seeing them retreat to the bus early because of exhaustion.

Took the chance to cuddle with MC on the way back. <3 But right after he drew on each of his brothers sleeping faces and took pictures for blackmail. <3333

"You'll get in trouble with this, you know.", MC warned him, having caught him in the act.

"I got to draw a wiener on Lucifer's face. It's worth it."

—————————–

LEVIATHAN:

The one who didn't wanna come so he brought an entire bag full of portable games he could play in the bus plus some manga/magazines.

Has his headphones obviously and is on his phone the entire ride.

But even though he says he doesn't wanna go, he's the one posting on social media about everything that's happening around him.

He's honestly not a bad seatmate but he will bore you to death so even if someone was assigned next to him, they eventually started roaming the bus in search of actual human interaction.

Everyone else is chatting and laughing among themselves and he's just on his phone. No one knows what he's actually doing there.

MC checked on him at one point, looking over his chair to see what he was doing. "Hey, Le—"

Levi yelped and dropped his phone on the floor from surprise, screaming at MC that they shouldn't sneak in on people like that.

His phone slid under Satan's chair and his brother picked it up, brows creasing at what was in the screen.

"...Levi, you really shouldn't watch h*ntai in the bus."

His brothers (+MC) never allowed him to live that one down.

His gift for MC at the amusement park was a plushie because he felt bad that they had to talk staff out of banning him from the park altogether. They were selling rip off merchandise, what was he supposed to do!? Stay quiet!?

He was fast asleep on the way home but woke up screaming at Mammon because he immediately saw his reflection on his phone. He had poop emojis on his cheeks like this:

(👁️💩👄💩👁️)

"YOU CAN'T EVEN BE CREATIVE ON WHAT YOU'LL DRAW? DELETE THAT PICTURE NOW!"

——————————————————– ✄

I hope you enjoyed! I'll do the other brothers next time because Tumblr hates me and keeps deleting my posts. </3 If you wanna see similar content, don't be shy to hop into my ask box (Anon asks is also on)! 🌷

[yandere-sins]

Past and Future

Horrortober Day 2: Decision  |  “It’s your decision. Choose wisely.”

Day 2 woop! Got a chance to work on my Kazuha a bit more. I hope to write for him more in the future!

Warnings: Yandere, Manipulation, Possessiveness, Stalking Mention Characters: Kadehara Kazuha x Reader

Kazuha couldn’t not notice the yearning in your gaze as you looked across the plaza at your old friends. These scumbags. Wannabe goody-two-shoes. Oh, how much he despised them. And yet, you longed for their laughter in your ears, the wrinkles in their eyes as they grinned and smiled at each other cheerfully. They were celebrating something Kazuha didn’t know about. But undoubtedly, you remembered after having been close to them since early childhood. 

And yet, you didn’t belong to their circle anymore. You hadn’t been invited to wine and laughter, food and celebration. Instead, you absentmindedly squeezed his hand tighter, and Kazuha took that as a sign. “Come on,” he mumbled, watching how sadness overcame you with every passing second. Frustration and anger, but mostly disappointment, snaked their way into your expression. You had been so excited for today, going out with him, exploring Liyue Harbor with your boyfriend, but the mood was ruined now. 

When you didn’t react, Kazuha used his free arm to lay it around you, pushing you forward despite your feet being unwilling to move. Part of you wanted to go to your friends, to join them in their festivity. But without being invited, you were way too hesitant to approach, and it hurt you even more. Your head hung low as you two finally disappeared in the crowd of people working and shopping, the night market making for a great scene. Still, you couldn’t take it in anymore after remembering your past heartbreak now.

Kazuha wasn’t the type to leave you alone, never wishing to be separated from the warmth and comfort you gave him by being by his side, but in your depressed state, it was hard to do anything with you. Placing you on a bench, Kazuha left to get you something to drink. His mind was wrecking itself of how to help you as he bought your favorite, seasonal beverage, still hot and steaming in its cup, and brought it back to you. 

Unfortunately, no one heard the clattering sound as he dropped it, watching you talk with some of your old friends. When did they come over to talk? Why were they here? How did they notice you? Why now of all times? This was his evening. His time with you. And yet, you hadn’t been as happy with him all night as you were when you talked to them. Kazuha’s expression changed from worried to upset as he had to watch you laugh with them, even though the mood seemed awkward from afar. Maybe they were apologizing, or perhaps just trying to replicate the good old times with you, but you seemed very receptive to their presence, smiling in a way that you never did when you were with Kazuha. 

It had taken a lot to break you guys apart. Not willingly, but they weren’t a good influence for you. He had never done anything to them, but one day they had decided they didn’t like the way he looked at you. That Kazuha was too ‘possessive’ and that the ‘took up all your time’. They told you to stay away from the outsider, to ignore the soft, wonderful feelings you two had for each other—the strong bond you were forming with your boyfriend. Your friends decided he wasn’t good for you but were they really your friends when they made you choose between them and your love? Gods, he hated what they did to you. Hated how miserable they could make you. You had been so nervous and anxious after they started harassing you to leave him, crying at night and into his shoulder when you didn’t know what to do. The first time you said you loved him was while you were assuring him that you still had feelings for him; that being the reason why it was so hard on you to be forced to make this decision. It wasn’t a romantic moment, but one filled with tears. Kazuha would never forgive them for robbing him of his amazing confession from your lips.

However, in the end? You chose him—naturally. You chose him for this very reason. Because you love him. Kazuha never made you decide. Sure, he didn’t like your friends, but he didn’t go out of his way to engage with them. He only ever had eyes for you, following you whenever you met with your so-called friends and making sure you’d be safe from them. However, he was better than them, and even if they made you cry on your way home, he never once went back to hurt them just as much as they hurt you, even if his blood was boiling. Kazuha would rather spend his time comforting you, asserting his place in your heart, than stick to the ones who were desperately trying to tear him out of said place. 

But maybe he should have.

Maybe he should have demanded that you decide on one side. After all, you were already distancing yourself from these people that kept hurting you in the name of ‘only wanting the best for you’. He was the best for you. There was nothing that could be better for you than Kazuha. He was strong; he was safe for you. No one else tended to you as gently and lovingly as he did. Comforted you when you were down. You had to wear the burden of everyone around you, but Kazuha only committed to you and your worries. He was the saving grace and the helping hand you needed in your desperation. The person your friends should have been if you had actually mattered to them. 

In return, you were the same for him. You gave his life a meaning that he had long searched for. A new friend and a love to wake his lonely heart again. No one could ever stir him like you did, and he was thankful. Thankful for the opportunity to be by your side, to warm you on cold nights, and to tell you about the past he never shared with anyone else. You were the listener he wanted; gave him the attention he needed. And Kazuha...

Kazuha wouldn’t lose you now. He couldn’t lose someone again. Not you.

Marching up to you and your friends gathering around, he listened to the meaningless conversation you had. “We’re sorry for saying such harsh things,” and “We were worried about you.” Loads of empty words, in his opinion. But seeing your eyes tear up at them made his heart sting and his blood boil all over again. It made him furious. Furious for you. You deserved so much better than these lies. They didn’t care about you!

Pushing through them without roughly, Kazuha only looked at you, finding your eyes instantly. You were surprised by his appearance but quickly wiped the tears from your eyes and returning to the silly, little smile you usually graced him with. One that was as empty as your friend’s words. One you adapted just to please him and not worry him further, but once he’d put an end to this, Kazuha knew you’d be able to smile at him properly again with a sincere one. 

“Choose,” he prompted, and you raised an eyebrow in confusion while your friends began to grow tense and murmur between themselves. 

“These people-” he made a vague gesture between the few gathered around, “-aren’t good for you, and you know it. They dropped you when you needed them the most while I’ve been with you all this time.”

“You can’t be serious,” you breathed, but Kazuha didn’t confirm your wish. He was serious, even if that meant upsetting you. This was for the best. “It’s your decision. Them or me. Choose wisely.”

“That’s unfair!” one of your friends cried out, upset about his intention, and Kazuha looked at them sharply from the corner of his eye, silencing them effectively. “It’s not unfair,” he shut their argument down, looking only at you as he spoke. “They made you choose first and broke your heart. I never have and never will hurt you. But I am not so sure about the people who already did it once.”

Kazuha’s words had impact; he could see it in your eyes. You, too, remembered the bad times that felt like your heart was ripped into pieces by the people you put so much trust in. And instead, it had been him who was there, making sure you ate and drank in your troubled times, and got rest when you needed it. Even if there was no luxury in his life, he still had been a better friend than any of them. Kazuha completely missed that he suggested dropping you the same way your friends had when he made you choose. He didn’t want to believe you would choose anyone over him after all he did for you. You belonged to him, and he belonged to you. That’s how love worked. 

“I love you.” 

A dirty trick. One that your friends couldn’t use. Kazuha directly pulled at your heartstrings, making you miss a breath as you grew even more blindsided. “I don’t want to lose you, again,” he didn’t hesitate to add, noticing how your friends’ faces grew worried and upset at his words. He was hinting at the bad time you two had gone through. The one that made a part of you die. But you only looked down, hands balling into fists as you felt conflicted. There was no need for you to wreck your pretty head over these nobodies, Kazuha decided, holding out his hand. You only needed him—as much as he needed you. 

Timidly, you reached for his hand, and he gripped yours tightly, pulling you up from your seat and after him, away from these fake friends and their fake worry without another word to them. “It’s better like this,” he assured you, dragging you through the crowd so you wouldn’t be able to look back at your past. He was before you, your future, and he wouldn’t let anyone take you from him and ruin this for you. 

But when you were unresponsive, he threw a glance back over his shoulder, noticing the tears streaming down your eyes. You two came to a stop as he turned around, cupping your face and pulling you into a kiss. Even though your hands came to rest against his chest, pushing, you never managed to escape his grip, forced to kiss him until neither of you could hold your breath anymore. Leaning his forehead against yours, you were left speechless, but not Kazuha.

“I love you. I love you so much. Promise me you’ll never go back to them.” It was hard to commit to that, but his hands grew tighter around your face, desperate to hear it. “You chose me,” he insisted, pain swinging in his voice. “You’re not leaving me.”

There was no way of saying where those emotions came from, but he didn’t give you time to think them over. This was the future he chose, by your side. And that night, you chose it too, even if you ended up not liking it once you found out that your friends had been right all along.

[blueathens]

4 Year Anniversary

𝖲𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: 𝖡𝖾𝗇 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗀𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝗇 𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗂𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖺𝗋𝗒.

𝖲𝗈𝗇𝗀: 𝖠𝗉𝗈𝗅𝗈𝗀𝗂𝗌𝖾 𝖻𝗒 𝖮𝗇𝖾𝖱𝖾𝗉𝗎𝖻𝗅𝗂𝖼 𝖰𝗎𝗈𝗍𝖾: "-𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗌𝖾 𝖬𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗆𝖾."

𝖱𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽//𝖱𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽//𝖱𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽//𝖱𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽//𝖱𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽

Masterlist//Dusk Till Dawn Masterlist//Agape Masterlist

“Gorgeous I’m home!” Ben called through the quiet home as he locked the door behind him, taking his shoes off and placing the keys on the small hooks by the door. “Gorgeous?” Ben called again when no one answered. “Baby?”

His eyes found a source of light coming from a pink candle that filled the room with it’s enchanting smell and he saw two plates of food and glasses of red wine next to it, untouched and he sighs as he rechecks the date on his phone only to see that it was your anniversary. The food was cold and the candle that swayed in the breeze he created with his movements.

He turned around, placing his phone on the table, and headed upstairs where you probably were either upset and mad at him or cursing at him during your sleep.

He slowly opened the bedroom door, the hallway light he turned on a second ago filled the entrance of the dark bedroom and he could see a curled-up ball on the bed, quietly sobbing to themselves due to their idiot of a husband forgetting something important to them.

“Gorgeous?” He ushered as he sat on the side of the bed, hand touching your leg, but you was quick to kick your leg to get his touch off from you. “I’m so sorry baby.” But you didn’t answer, and Ben sighed knowingly. “I deserve the silent treatment, I know, but please baby, tell me how to make this better.”

You still didn’t answer.

“I was at Mason’s, and we got carried away and-” He stopped himself short when he realised he wasn’t making this any better for himself. “Look, sweetheart, I got something for our 4-year-anniversary.” Ben took his shirt off before nudging his finger into your back and your turned around angrily only to see your name in cursive writing on the area where his heart was. You couldn’t lie when you felt your heart soften especially knowing that wasn’t the first tattoo he got to represent you.

The first one being your star sign on his finger in the style of star alignment on his ring finger, he got it one year before proposing you and you had the same tattoo on your ring finger but his stars. Ben wanted it done for both a promise for staying together and that he will propose to you one day and that when the time comes he will still be wear a form of ring on his finger whenever he takes if off for football or you for work (sometimes).

It warmed your heart knowing that he thought of you for another tattoo, and you watched how his eyes flickered to the necklace round your neck as he pulled something out of his trouser pocket. A small box was pulled from it and if you weren’t married already you would have thought he was proposing.

But inside the box was a charm of the letter ‘B’ and your heart fluttered when you knew he wanted you to have a piece of him on your necklace, not like the small chilli charm on it wasn’t proof enough for him.

“I know you already have one for me but-”

“Why do you always choose something else over me?” You asked him quietly, voice rough from the tears you’ve been crying all day. “Why don’t you make time for me anymore…I just wanted today to be special as it’s a 4-year-anniversay Benjamin-” his eyes squeezed shut at the use of his full name. “-but you chose Mase over me.”

“Angel, I didn’t mean-”

“Don’t say you didn’t mean too; it’s been happening a lot lately and I don’t know…why am I still staying with a man who clearly doesn’t want me around.”

“I do want-”

“You don’t though because if you did you would be here. You would be here as my husband.” You tried to get up, but Ben’s arms wrapped around you to pull you back onto the bed, Ben being quick to climb over you and lay above you with his arms on each side of you.

“I’m going to be here from now on.” He promises you with certainty in his eyes.

“Are you?”

“Yes.” He answered without no hesitation. “Your right, I’ve been a complete dick and I want you to stay. I want you to stay forever because I can’t love anyone else. I can’t be with anyone else who isn’t you.”

You nodded as you looked next to you where the box laid, hand reaching out for it as your eyes darted to his tattoo. “Both of these presents are very pretty.”

“Yeah?” Ben whispered not knowing if he was forgiven or not.

“But I need something as an apology present.” You smirked, one hand dancing up to scratch the back of his neck.

“Trust me, I’m making up for this forever.” He brushed his lips against yours.

“You better.” You whispered and Ben nodded, eyes fluttering shut at the closeness between the two of you.

“Trust me, you will be forgiving me by the end of the night.” He promises. “But first I need to blow out those candles before the house gets on fire and then you’ll blame me for that as I was the last one downstairs.” He jumped off from you, sprinting down the stairs at full speed to get back to you.

“Ben!”

A/N: I wasn’t meant to tie these request together but somehow I did in the spring of writing it...sorry 

[sergeantsporks]

Timeline: Belos dies of old man disease. Everyone tries to fill power vacum themselves, monarchists want 6 year old Hunter as their puppet ruler. Hunter nopes out, gets adopted by Bat Queen, bonds with Red and learns wild magic. Later monarchists find and present him but he goes off script and declares w.m. legal. Even years later people still want him as their pawn but he's happy to work with BQ, the library and Hexside researching and teaching w.m. Enter Luz. What happens?

Oh my GOSH this one ran away with me and got really freaking long for a writing request, I feel an AU coming on, but ANYWAY

“Without a symbol… the coven system only held sway because of the emperor, he was the chosen mouthpiece of the titan and all that. We can’t keep this up without him.”

Hot tears flooded to Hunter’s eyes as he watched the coven leaders from a hidden spot, a spot his—his uncle had shown him. They didn’t care about his uncle—they never had. And they wouldn’t care about him, either, now that his uncle was gone. They’d just been after power.

“Familial,” the potion master growled, “His nephew. We can claim the titan chose the whole family—that the new rightful heir is Hunter.”

Hunter clapped a hand over his mouth to muffle his squeak of surprise.

I can’t be emperor.

That’s—that’s Uncle’s job.

But Uncle Belos was…

“Bit risky, isn’t it? If he doesn’t share Belos’ vision—”

The young Abomination leader, Darius, snorted. “He’s six, I don’t think it’ll be hard to work with him. Just shove a lollipop in the brat’s mouth and tell him what to say.”

Hunter scrubbed tears away with a grubby hand. He was getting dirt and tears all over his funeral suit. Uncle wouldn’t have approved.

Hunter padded softly back out to the hallways, running back to his room. He sniffed, wiped his nose on his sleeve, and started shoving clothes in a bag.

I’m not going to listen to Darius he thought vindictively, scooting under the bed for his hidden stash of snacks and shoving those into his bag, too. After a moment of hesitation, he shoved his pink frog plushie on top, buckling the straps tightly. He changed out of his funeral suit, wearing his tunic and cape instead.

The door creaked open. “Hunter, it’s time for…” Lilith Clawthorne stopped dead in her tracks. “Hm.”

Hunter backed away. “I’m running away, and you can’t stop me! I don’t want to stay and be the emperor!”

“Great, I don’t want you to either.”

Hunter blinked, unsure if he’d heard her right. “Wh-what?”

“I’ll get you out of the keep without anyone noticing, you run off into the wilderness and never come back. How’s that sound?”

“Why do you care?”

“Because I don’t want you on the throne, and I especially don’t want those other idiots we call coven heads calling the shots using you as a puppet. So let’s go.”

“Where—where am I going to go?”

She rolled her eyes. “Are you telling me that you were going to run away with NO plan? Titan. Alright, alright, let me think. Ugh. You can’t stay anywhere civilized, they’ll find you. You have to get far away from the keep, and away from any cities—you think you can survive out there?”

Hunter nodded, sniffling. “I can—I can do it.”

“Right, then.” Lilith summoned her staff, and held out a hand. “Hold on tightly.”

Hunter squeezed her hand, and with an odd, twisting, pulling sensation, the world faded and changed. The keep was behind the two of them. Lilith let him go. “I’ll stall the coven leaders. Make sure they check every inch of the keep before they go outside looking for you. Get running.”

Hunter nodded. “Thank you.”

“What are you still doing here? You want them to find you?”

Hunter shook his head, running away as fast as his legs would take him, away from the keep where his uncle was dead, away from the scheming coven leaders, away from Lilith. He ran all the way to the nearest town, then remembered Lilith’s words, and started to walk around it. His stomach growled at him, crying for food, and he sat down on the ground, tugging the snacks he’d packed out of his bag. He opened a package of crackers, and then a small red bird swooped down from the trees, snatching it out of his hand. Hunter jumped up, shoving his snacks back into his bag.

“Hey! Give that back!”

The bird warbled cheerfully at him, and then flew off. Hunter chased after it, crashing through bushes and brambles, stumbling over tree roots.

“Get back here!”

The bird stopped in a tree, tilting its head at him. Hunter glared at it. “Give me those!”

The bird chirped again, bent down, and snapped off a piece of cracker.

“Oooo—”

Hunter grabbed a low-hanging branch, jumping and scrambling into the tree. He clambered upwards, huffing and puffing as he pulled himself up branches. He finally got to the branch with the bird, out of breath. “Got you!”

It fluttered up higher.

“Nooooooooo, come ooooooooooooon!” he whined, “Not fair!” He grabbed the next branch. The bird trilled out a warning. And the branch snapped under his weight.

Hunter crashed back down through the tree, twisting and trying to grab onto another branch, but the rough wood scratched up his hands, and he landed with a thump on the ground. The wind was knocked out of his lungs, and he struggled to breathe for a few minutes, gasping like a landed fish.

The moment Hunter got his breath back, he started to cry. Everything hurt, and he missed home, and his uncle.

“Here now, little witchling. What is all of this noise about?”

Hunter sniffed, slowly rolling over to see a massive bat—witch—thing standing over him. He yelped, scrambling to his feet and limping away as fast as he could, still sniffing and sobbing as he stumbled over his own feet. He tripped over a tree root and crashed to the ground again.

There was a rush of air, and the bat thing landed in front of him. Hunter cried out as she reached forward with one wing, convinced she would eat him.

Instead, she gently brushed that pesky strand of hair out of his face, clucking her tongue softly. Hunter sniffed and looked up to see the little red bird perched where her wing met her face. It chirped at him, hopping from one foot to another. The bat woman shook her head slightly.

“You are too young to be out alone.”

“I d-don’t w-want to be—to be—to be eeeeemperoooooor,” he sobbed, his shoulders heaving.

The bat woman wrapped one wing around him, scooping him up and setting him on her head. “Then come with Bat Queen. You don’t have to be emperor with me. Stay, with all the others who are lost. Forgotten. Alone. But we are together. Yes. Come.”

She took off, flying through the trees down to a cave. Small, wild creatures peered at him, chattering to each other. Hunter slid off of the Bat Queen’s head, still sniffling, and she gently patted his head with her wing.

“You will be safe with us, witchling.

The small red bird hopped towards him, shyly offering him the cracker pack. It dropped the package near him, and nudged it towards him with its head. Hunter reached out and took the crackers. After a moment, he broke one in half, crumbling it in one pudgy fist and dropping the crumbs on the ground for the bird. “Did—did you get the Bat Queen? But you’re a bird!”

“A palisman,” the Bat Queen corrected, “Born of wild magic.”

Hunter stumbled backwards from the bird. “W-wild—”

“We are not dangerous. We are not wrong.”

The bird hopped forward again, and Hunter reached out, gingerly patting its head. It chirped cheerfully at him, then turned into a staff, like Lilith’s staff.

The Bat Queen nodded. “They have chosen you as their witch. It is a sacred bond.”

Hunter picked up the staff. It was taller than he was, but as his hands closed around it, it shrank until it was just the right size for him. The bird on top chirped, the staff disappeared, and it landed on his shoulder, nuzzling his face. Hunter patted it.

“S-so—like a friend?”

“Like the best, most loyal friend you will ever have,” the Bat Queen sighed, “A friend that will never give up on you, no matter how long you are separated.”

Hunter cupped the small bird in his hands, beaming at it. “I’d never give up on you, either!”

Xxx

“Locked and loaded. Target: sighted.” Hunter held a hand out for his palisman. They’d been bonded for seven or eight years now, and he could call the little bird from almost anywhere. “You ready, Red?”

They landed on his outstretched hand, chirping an affirmation. Hunter pointed the bird at the target. “Go!”

Red shot like an arrow from his hand, fluttering around the face of the target, a witch in his thirties with a bunch of bags. The witch dropped the bags, yelping and batting at the tiny palisman, and Hunter launched himself forward, scooping up one bag in particular and continuing to run, hopping a fence and whistling for Red as he disappeared back into the forest. A few minutes later, the bird caught up, and Hunter shook the bag at them.

“Score, buddy!” he pulled out a box of Kraken Krisps, tearing at the wrapper. “Forest foraging is great and all, but hey, treat time!” He put one in his mouth and then crumpled up one of the crackers, holding his hand out. Red perched on his thumb and pecked gently at the crumbs, careful not to peck Hunter’s hand on accident. Hunter leaned against a tree, humming contentedly as he munched on his prize.

“Look at what you’ve been reduced to, Golden Guard.”

Hunter stiffened at the title he’d very nearly forgotten. Red perked up, ready to fight. A witch swung down from a tree, and whistled. Another witch came towards them from the town side. Red shifted into their staff form, and Hunter gripped it tightly. Trapped. Not good.

“Stealing crackers? Living in the woods like a wild animal?”

“I like living in the woods.”

The tree witch held out their hand. “Your uncle wouldn’t have wanted this for you. He always knew you were destined for more.”

The titan has big plans for you, Hunter.

For me? Really?

Yes, you are very important to him.

“I don’t want to go back.”

“We’ve been looking for you—look, the empress is false, she doesn’t belong there. The throne is your birthright. The coven leaders said you ran away—and we’ve been looking for you ever since.”

Hunter shook his head, frustrated. “I ran away because I didn’t want to rule!”

The witch reached out as if to grab him. “That was when you were six. You were too young. But now—”

Hunter lunged forward, biting their hand. He swung his staff into their head, then clutched the shaft tightly. “Ready?”

They disappeared in a flash of gold. “BAT QUEEN!” Hunter yelled, warping further into the trees, “BAT QUEEN, HE—”

A puddle of purple goo sprang to life in front of him, and a hand covered his mouth and nose, cutting off his screams.

Darius!

Hunter tried to warp away, but Red was ripped from his grasp. He stomped and punched Darius’ goo, but his movements got weaker and weaker as he ran out of oxygen.

N-no!

I don’t… want… to go… back…

Xxx

“Come on, you stupid brat, say the line!”

Hunter threw a book at Darius. “I want my palisman back!”

The coven head dodged the missile. “You’ll get your palisman back after you’re on the throne.”

“I don’t WANT to be on the throne!”

“Then you don’t get your palisman. This is very easy to understand, I don’t see what the problem is. Now say the lines.”

Hunter crossed his arms, fuming. “I ran away because I was scared and confused,” he recited, “I couldn’t find my way back to the keep, but luckily the monarchists found me and brought me back to my birthright. I will be taking control of the throne that belonged to my uncle, and taking up the work he started. Thanks, Lilith, for keeping it warm for me.”

“Do NOT say that last part.” Darius rubbed his temples. “Are you going to behave? Because if you don’t, you will never see your palisman again.”

“Yeah,” Hunter grumbled, “Fine, I’ll behave.”

“Good. Let’s go.”

Darius held the door open, and Hunter held his chin up, walking past the coven head onto the throne dais. Lilith blinked at him, her mouth dropping open.

“H-hunter!”

Hunter gave her a nod. Murmuring spread around the throne room. Darius had timed this perfectly—in the middle of a broadcast. If Hunter took the throne, there wouldn’t be any going back—everyone would know his face, no one would leave him alone. He squared his shoulders.

For Red.

“Hello, citizens of the Boiling Isles. As difficult as it may be to believe, I am Hunter, the Golden Guard, nephew to the late Emperor Belos. I disappeared at the time of my uncle’s death, leaving a vacuum for the throne, which Lilith Clawthorne has filled these last few years. I ran away because I was scared and confused. I couldn’t find my way back to the keep. Luckily, the monarchists found me and brought me back to my birthright.” Hunter took a deep breath. “However, it was NOT the monarchists who cared for me all these years.”

“What are you doing?!” Darius hissed.

Hunter ignored him. “I was taken in by the Bat Queen. I bonded with a palisman, who is now my best friend. I was raised in the ways of wild magic. I respect my uncle deeply, and all he did to bring order to the isles. And I will take his throne, and his vision of a united isles. But I won’t turn my back on the people who raised me. As of now, by the power of the throne that is mine by birthright, wild magic is no longer a criminal offense. All wild witches who have been held prisoner will be released. While the covens will remain pillars of leadership in their fields, registration in a coven will no longer be required, and those who still choose to join a coven will not be prevented from practicing other forms of magic. I know this is a major change in how we on the isles do things. But we lived this way before. We can do it again.” He turned to Darius. “My palisman?”

Darius scowled, but snapped his fingers. One of his abomination creatures opened a small cage where Red was being held—off camera, Hunter noticed with disgust—and Red flew to his outstretched hand. Hunter nodded to Lilith. “Thank you for your service. The keys to the dungeon, please?”

“Of course,” she said smoothly, standing gracefully, and holding out a ring of keys, “We always waited for your return.”

“Yes, thank you. Now, if you’ll all excuse me, I’ve got some prisoners to free.”

Hunter strode out of the room, hoping and praying that he remembered his ways through the hallway. After a few minutes, Lilith emerged from a side hallway, falling in step with him.

“I thought you said you’d stay away,” she hissed, “Maybe you’re not six anymore, but I still don’t want you on the throne.”

“I didn’t exactly get much of an option. You have a palisman, and isn’t your sister a wild witch? Why would you keep wild magic illegal all these years?”

“My grip on the throne was tenuous enough as is! Kikimora spent most of her time trying to undermine me! You think I could have gotten away with immediately undoing everything the last ruler did?! I know you think you’re doing the right thing, here, but—”

“I’ve got royal bloodline. Or whatever.”

“That’s not going to save you!”

“Hey, that’s what you’re here for, right? Since you’re head of the emperor’s coven again?”

“Thanks to you, that position doesn’t exactly hold much power anymore, now does it?”

“People will still join covens, even without the obligation.” Hunter pushed open the dungeon doors, swinging the ring of keys around his fingers. “Oh, and I want to build a roost for the Bat Queen.”

“What.”

“She’s the wealthiest demon on the boiling isles, besides being the one who raised me. Good allyship, rebuilding witch and demon relations, yada yada.” Hunter grinned at Warden Wrath. “Oh, hey! We’re releasing everyone.”

“Ev-every—”

“I mean, not the murderers and whatnot, but wild witches?” Hunter waved a hand. “Free to go. Bye. Get out of here. I did a whole broadcast, c’mon.”

Warden Wrath looked to Lilith, who sighed. “He’s the emperor now. It’s his call.”

“You’re all free to go!” Hunter yelled down to the lower levels as Warden Wrath opened the gates. “Bye! Go practice wild magic to your hearts’ content!” He strode back towards the keep. “Lilith, can I trust you?”

“No.”

“Great. Can I trust that you still don’t want the other coven leaders running the show?”

“You can trust that,” she admitted.

“Okay. Hey, I’m going to leave you in control while I go on a little trip.”

“Go—you just got to power, where are you going?!”

“To visit the Bat Queen. I… probably have a lot of explaining myself to do.”

Xxx

Luz stumbled back from the creepy fairy that wanted her skin, swatting it out of the air. “Ah!” She bolted, ducking behind someone else’s stall. “Ha—haaaaaaah—ohhhhhhhhhhhh—what! Is! Going! O—”

“I TOLD you, the weird energy spike was THIS way, come on, Red, where are you-?”

A small red bird flapped towards Luz, followed by…

“An elf?”

The blonde elf gently smacking a handheld device looked up, blinking at her. “Why would—ohmytitan. You’re a human. I—HEY, whoa!” He grabbed Luz’s wrist as she started to make a break for it. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, I’m not going to hurt you! You’re a—you’re from another dimension, which means you came through a portal, right? Portals are made with titan’s blood, so you must know where there’s a leak!”

“What—I don’t—” Luz wrenched away. “Let me go, you weirdo!”

“H-hey, wait!” He chased after her. “If you’re human, that means you don’t have magic, right? Like me!”

The elf boy skidded past her, holding his arms out. “Wait, wait, wait, just hear me out—”

A couple of massive things with pointy masks loomed behind him. “Is she bothering you, sir?”

“Hrm? Oh—hey, I don’t need a bodyguard, I have Red!”

“Lady Lilith—”

“Lady Lilith isn’t in charge.” The elf boy pushed the guard things fruitlessly. “Go! Away! It’s just! Research!”

By the time he looked around, Luz was gone, hiding in an alleyway. Something slithered behind her, and she whirled around to see rat-worm thing lunging towards her. Luz shrieked, backing out of the alleyway.

And right into the elf boy, knocking both of them over.

“Oof—hey.” He drew an odd circle on the ground and smacked it. A wall of ice rose up and smacked the rat-worm back. He scrambled up, offering her a hand. “Uhhhh so maybe we got off on the wrong foot. Hi. I’m Hunter. This is Red.” He held a hand out for the cardinal that had first found her. “And you are…”

Luz took his hand, letting him pull her up to her feet. “L-Luz.”

“Right. That’s great. Uh. So. You probably want to go back home, right?”

“Y-yeah, my mom will be so worried—”

“Okay. So why don’t you lead me to that titan’s blood, and I’ll… see what I can do. I’ve been reading my uncle’s lab notebooks, he was OBSESSED with portals to the human realm, and��� Okay, so I’ve been tracking these weird energy spikes,” he chattered excitedly, his eyes lighting up. He stopped, as if remembering something, and reached into a pocket and pulled out a cracker, crumbling it up. “Hold out your hand.” Luz did, and he dropped the crumbs in. His cardinal hopped down to her hand with a cheerful warble, pecking at the crumbs. “Oh, look, Red likes you, see?”

Luz felt a smile creep over her face as she watched the little cardinal. Maybe this world wasn’t completely freaky.

Hunter gave the bird a pat, then waved his hand. “Anyway, the spikes. My uncle didn’t really notice them, but there are these… shifts? I guess? In wild magic whenever these spikes occur. They’re pretty regular, so once I could figure out WHEN they were happening, I just needed to figure out WHERE. So I built this thing.” He held up his little device. “It tracks fluxes in wild magic, pinpoints where they’re strongest—I have little sensors set up all over the isles that can triangulate positioning. I tracked it here, where I found you—or, well, Red did. Anyway, but if YOU’RE here at the source of the spike, then that means I was RIGHT, and the fluxes ARE a result of interdimensional travel.” Hunter scratched his head, frowning at his screen. “It’s really odd for there to be a spike here, though, there aren’t really any bodies of water besides the boiling sea, so I’m not sure where the leak—”

“I didn’t come through some lake or pond or puddle or whatever,” Luz interrupted, “There was a door. And I just… walked through.”

Red jumped, fluttering to Hunter’s shoulder with a frantic chirp. Hunter nearly dropped his tracker. “A door? Can you show me?!”

“I—I don’t know, there was this freaky witch, and…”

“Please?”

Luz snickered despite herself. “What if I didn’t?”

He waved a hand. “I mean, I guess I could have you thrown in a dungeon or something.”

Luz shut up really fast. “What?”

“Oh, uhhhhhhhhhh, yeah. I’m sort of… the emperor of the boiling isles?” He rubbed the back of his head, looking down at the ground embarrassed. “It’s… a whole thing. I wouldn’t actually throw you in a dungeon. Seems kind of counterintuitive. Anyway. I can keep the witch away. If they really scare you.”

“What do you want with the door, anyway?”

“Are you CRAZY? To study it? Your realm has NO magic, right?”

Luz scanned the city, then started back towards the tent she’d emerged from. “Right.”

“I was thinking… maybe there’s a connection between that and why I don’t have any magic?”

“Yes you do, I saw you do the thing with the circles.”

“Oh, that? That’s not… I mean, it’s magic, but not MY magic, anyone could do that, even you.”

Luz stopped dead in her tracks, and he ran into her with a little oof. “I could do that?”

“Yeah.”

Luz whirled around, grabbing Hunter by the shoulders. “Show me, show me, show me, showmeshowmeshowme!”

“Ack—yeah, okay, okay, but first we need to find that portal before it gets away. And with it, your only chance of getting home.”

“Right, right.” Luz led him to the tent where the strange witch had been. “It’s right… here?” The stall was gone, with just a note that read Catch me next time, imperial scum, with a little doodle of a face with its tongue sticking out.

Hunter picked up the paper. “Ooooohhh. Hm. Yeah, that’s a problem.”

“What? What’s a problem?”

“It’s…” he sighed. “Sooooo my uncle outlawed wild magic, and there was this one witch who kept practicing it, so she was a criminal, and I legalized wild magic when I got the throne buuuuuuut… she thinks it’s a trap, so every time I try to approach her to find out more about her particular magic, she… usually runs away. And hexes my guards if they try to approach. Even her own sister can’t get close to her. Aaaaaand it looks like she has… the portal that can get you home?”

“WHAT?!”

“I’ll help you get home!” Hunter promised quickly, “We’ll get her next time—now that I know she’s the reason behind the energy spikes, I can track her. And in the meantime… maybe you can tell me more about the human realm?”

Luz squinted at him. “Only if you promise to teach me that thing you did with those circles.” She held her hand out. “Deal?”

He grinned, shaking her hand. “Deal.”

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Hue and Cry XVIII

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), trauma, some elements untagged.

This is dark!medieval!Bucky Barnes x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Synopsis: The reader and Zemo try to figure out what’s next.

Note: I actually think we’re closer to an end then the beginning. My goal is to finish this before moving onto anything else but that might be my original stuff so I might take a little break after this series to figure that out! Your patience and following along has meant the world to me. <3

Thanks to everyone and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

MASTERLIST

In the coming days, trunks were opened and stuffed with clothes, blankets, and miscellany. The servants did much of the work as when you were asked what to bring, you chose three plain dresses for you and several more outfits for Elina. Zemo tutted and ordered his staff to fill the chests.

There was no distinct urgency however as the horses were to be re-shoed before you set off and the baron seemed content to enjoy the summer sun with your daughter. He would sit with the two of you under the tree or take her on a walk of his sprawling green or dangle some ornament before her to reach for.

Your mind didn’t retreat from the prospect of your departure. He said a fortnight at longest, you had to leave before that. You worried about Elina and how she’d miss him and how she’d fare on the road. She was a healthy child but you couldn’t help but think of all that could go wrong.

The third day after the announcement of your looming trek, you sat on the balcony as Elina chewed on berries and Zemo sat with a book. The air was thick and damp from the heat but the sun was tamped out behind the gathering clouds. He wore his shirt untied at the top so that the fur of his chest peeked out and you wore a sleeveless cotton gown in a pale blue.

“Do you intend on negotiating? Truly?” you asked as your mind wandered.

He looked over the book and reached over to scoop up a slice of strawberry from Elina’s shirt and flicked it into the saucer, “what do you mean?”

“Are you going to try to seal the alliance they want or is it all a ruse?”

“My liege has given me leave to approach their proposal however I wish. If they present some benefits for us then yes, I should like to have peace but… they’ve not offered anything before that we couldn’t find elsewhere,” he shrugged and lowered the book, “are you concerned for them? The people who let you suffer as such?”

“It is still my homeland but that is not what I’m worried for. I wonder how long your patience can wear on,” you said.

“We have spoke on this, we both know--”

“Yes, I know, but… how long should I have left with my daughter?” you hissed.

“You think I mean to take you from her? Perhaps march you to your death?” he scowled.

“I know however this turns out, my place in it is perilous,” you retorted, “do not mock my fears.”

“I do not--” he took a breath and his sneer softened. He chuckled as he leaned forward, “you are stronger than before, you know that? You snap like a lioness. I thought you underestimated me but I see you only misjudge yourself.”

“You are vague with me so how can I trust--”

“I have seen you through your recovery, through a labour, and a life beyond that,” he said, “I only ask a little more for all that I’ve done.”

You sat back and cupped your chin. You looked at Elina, dark juices smeared around her lips. She was entirely undisturbed by the bickering of adults. You reached over and took her tiny, sticky hand. 

You thought of Lord Barnes and if you should face him again. The idea made your blood run cold. Would he hate you? Would he still want you? You did not doubt he would have some cruelty left for you but as you were, scarred and hobbled, would it be different? And if he discovered your daughter, what then?

“He can never know about her,” you said softly and cautiously looked at the baron, “please, he can’t--”

“If he ever sees her, he will only know her to be mine but I have no intent upon my daughter being near that brute in her lifetime,” he growled. No little baroness but ‘my daughter’. You smiled at Elina and she squeezed your finger.

“I am grateful for all you’ve done for her. I know you didn’t have to--” your eyes strayed beyond the railing as some distant movement flurried beneath the sun. You squinted and leaned on the arm of your chair as you tried to see the specks along the horizon.

Zemo followed your gaze and stood. He went to the golden scope he kept on the balcony and put his eye to it as he adjusted the sights. He tilted it and stood stalk straight as if he’d been struck. The scope bobbled and he steadied it.

“Get her to your rooms,” he said, “lock the door and don’t make a sound.”

“What? What is it?”

“They are early,” he hit his open hand with a fist, “the letter… it could not be. The king must’ve assumed and sent the party prematurely.” He went to Elina and lifted her. He kissed her cheek and waved you up to your feet, “go on, take her. Keep her quiet as you can. I will house them on a lower floor but they cannot suspect you, understood?”

“How do you--”

“The banner, it is all I can make out,” he said as he grabbed your cane and rushed you back through his cool chambers, “you will lock the door and I will have Ulrich keep watch over the corridor.”

“You didn’t see who it was?” you asked as he opened the door and thrust you out into the hallway.

“You will know when I know,” he assured, “keep your candles unlit and draw the curtains.”

“My lord--”

“I did not plan for this,” he said as he marched you down the hall. You tried not to stumble as he still had your cane and you only had him to keep you from falling, “my lady, I do fear you will not make it to the Creek as we planned.”

He stopped at your door and you hugged Elina as you leaned against the wall. She was entirely untroubled by the sudden upheaval, ever a happy baby. “My cane,” you pointed to his hand as he gripped the silver topper, “please?”

“Oh, I-- Yes,” he handed it to you then reached to open your door, “keep that close…” he said, “just in case.”

“We’ll be as quiet as we can,” you assured him as you held Elina against your hip and limped with your can into the dim chamber.

“I will have Tess secret up some food before their arrival but you do not come out for anyone but me. I will knock,” he tapped a pattern on the door, “like so.”

“Yes, my lord,” you squeezed Elina as the nerves stormed inside of you.

He sighed and gripped the door as he leaned on it, “I only have a few hours to hide the evidence of you and all we’ve done to see you off. Even so, they will not suspect anything unless they are fed crumbs, yes?”

“I understand, my lord,” you stiffened and forced back the panic, “we will see what comes and do as we must,” you swayed Elina as she began to fuss, “for her.”

“For her,” he repeated, “now I must go.”

He closed the door and you set Elina down on the rug with the mouse Tess had sewn for her. You went to the door and twisted the latch into place. You turned back to watch your daughter as she tossed the toy and giggled. She pushed herself up to her feet, more certain everytime she stood. The time was passing much too quick.

🏰

You tried to distract yourself by playing with Elina and keeping her quiet. You worried however, the few times she made noise, that you would blow it all. When Tess brought the food, it was easier as your daughter grew hungry and restless. Once she had a proper meal in her, she was ready to lay down. She dozed beside you on the bed as you listened to the activity below.

First, you heard the horses through the window and the rattling carts and carriages. The voices were too distant to discern above a muffle and you weren’t so foolish as to peek out, even from so high up. You calmed yourself by watching Elina sleep but you knew you would not rest that night.

The sun sunk further behind the clouds and the evening approached with a dullness which forewarned of storms. You flinched at every noise, even floors below, and waited and waited and waited.

You had faith in Zemo, he was a great pretender. It was that very quality which kept you wary of him for so long. 

When Elina stirred again, you quieted her cries with your tit but she wasn’t taking to your nipple as eagerly as before. It calmed her for a while but she was soon awake again. You let her explore the chamber but not far from you and kept her away from the clacking wooden blocks gifted her by the baron.

And then the knock came as the sky blackened and grey clouds rumbled above. The rhythm drew you to the latch and Zemo slipped through the door. He was quick to lock it again as you ambled without your cane, afraid to tap the floor too hard with it. Elina greeted him with a shrill cry but it was blanketed by the bluster of the rising chaos in the heavens.

“The storm will frighten her but it should also help hide her,” Zemo said plaintively, “I hope.”

“They are here and settled?” you asked.

“Yes, so they are,” he confirmed as he picked up Elina, “They are too concerned with themselves to worry about any dead women hidden above.”

He sat in the armchair as the girl played with his beard as she liked to do. He smiled and let her, poking out his tongue until she did the same. He bounced her on his lap and she gibbered noisily.

“They are floors down, you should be safe to exist but if she cries, you will have to be quick to quiet her,” he girded.

“Anyone we know?” you asked as you sat on the foot of the bed and rubbed your hip.

He was silent and kept his attention on Elina. He raised his hand and let her bend his fingers to her will. She grabbed onto his ring and twisted it around his knuckle.

“My lord, is there--”

“Yes,” he huffed at last. He kissed the child’s forehead and set her down to crawl across the carpet, though she didn’t go far before she was distracted by her stuffed mouse.

“Who is it?” you asked as you folded your hands.

He rubbed his forehead then pushed his head back, “it isn’t him,” he assured, “if they were callous enough to send him or he was fool enough to come, well, we wouldn’t be having this placid conversation.”

“Who?” you asked again.

“His dog, Lord Rogers,” Zemo spat, “I don’t know which is worse. The man was watching Melinda as a wolf would watch a deer. I don’t even know the girl has flowered yet and he would be sniffing at her skirts. Despicable.”

“Rogers?” you breathed and your chest knotted. 

A roll of thunder boomed at that very moment and made you gasp. Elina stopped playing and her lip began to quiver. You slid off the bed to your knees and went to her and gathered her up. You cooed and hushed her and she clung to the collar of your dress. You watched her face as the fear retreated and she turned to watch the window flash. The terror turned to curiosity in an instant.

“Ha, look how brave she is,” he snickered.

You nodded, speechless still. Your nose tingled and your eyes burned. You were so overcome at the idea of that man being so close. You recalled that day in the forest, your singular mistake, then the scene in the carriage, and that on the staircase when Zemo himself had kept you from his perversions.

“My lady?” he said, “you look unsettled.”

“Take her,” you murmured then cleared your throat, “please, take Elina.”

He got up and took her from your arms. You pulled yourself up by the bedpost and leaned against it, your grip tightened around the carved wood. Your chest pattered in time with the downpour against the castle walls. You shook as you felt the scar along your face and those that led down beneath your dress. It hadn’t just been Barnes.

“Lady?” Zemo got closer as Elina babbled.

“I… can’t breathe,” you said and turned to fall back onto your rear, the mattress dipping beneath you as your fingers clung to the post, “I can’t…”

‘A bird, a bird, high above the cloud…’ he began to sing as much to Elina as you, a tune in his own tongue, ‘a wing, a wing, flaps without a sound…’ he rocked the girl but kept his eyes on you, ‘an angel, an angel, looking down on me. A blessing, a blessing, cast upon the lea…’

He reached with one hand and drew you up to your feet. He let you lean against him as he embraced you against your daughter and kept swaying in time to his voice and the sudden onslaught of the storm, ‘a lady, a lady, spinning at her wheel. A mother, a mother, her will as strong as steel…”

You clung to his sleeve and buried your face against the thin cotton. He kept singing until Elina was quiet and the rattling of your bones stilled. You were embarrassed at the sudden emotion which overcame you and the dampness on your cheeks. He carefully sat you back down and shushed.

The rain continued but the thunder passed. He moved carefully to lay Elina in her cot and stood as you hid your face behind your hand.

“I’m…” you uttered.

“No, that man. I remember that day,” he sat beside you and gripped his knees, “I know what he would’ve done and I am wise enough to know it was not the first he’d touched you.”

“It was long ago,” you said, “I shouldn’t be so… frail.”

“You are...strong. You must stay strong for her,” he sniffed and touched your elbow, “but you feel it now.”

“Feel what?” you blinked at him.

“The longing… for vengeance?”

You stared into his dark eyes and your chest continued to twist. Your spine went rigid and your jaw clenched. “I do,” you nodded and looked over at your daughter, “I feel it so very deeply.”

[ginazmemeoir]

Baby Garuda Experiences Childhood Trauma

“Why are they so mean to me maa?” asked Garuda, sniffling, tears streaming down his furry face and sliding down his beak. The nagas, his cousins and half-brothers, had told him that they would play with him, but had then instead coiled themselves around his body, constricting his limbs and his neck in an attempt to suffocate him to death. Red marks had formed wherever they had coiled, a few of his feathers were broken, and his arms were still sore. Vinata, applying ointment to his wounds, instead chose silence. Why, why did she ever agree to bet on that stupid horse? Why did she agree to wager her and her son’s life, all over her pride? Why did she choose eternal servitude to her sister and her children, when the matter could’ve ended then and there?

Ages ago, Vinata and her sister Kadru had bet over whether Ucchaishravas, the king of horses and Lord Indra’s mount, was actually all white or not. Kadru had argued that he had a black hair in his tail while Vinata had disagreed, knowing for a fact that Kadru was wrong. But come the day of the bet, the horse magically had a black tail! Suspecting foul play, she accused Kadru of cheating, but failed to prove it. Bound to her word, Vinata had to become her sister’s slave, and her son was thus born into slavery.

Vinata wanted to kill those nagas. She wanted to boil them alive and make Kadru watch, just the same way she was made to watch each time they tormented her son. But all she could do was cry at night, exhausted from donning her armour throughout the day, just to stay strong for her son, for they were the only ones there for each other here in Nagaloka, the abode of the nagas. Having finished applying the salve, and trying not to maintain eye contact with him, she said,

“Beta, they are your cousins. I am sure they meant no harm, its just they are used to playing rough. Next time they invite you over to play, just say no.”

“But I have no other friend mother. They say that slaves aren’t supposed to have friends.”

Garuda’s words shocked Vinata. She could not believe that someone could expel such vitriol through their words and their actions, that too on an innocent child. Slamming the bowl down, she sat on the ground and made Garuda sit in her lap, hugging him. They sat like this for a while, as Vinata kissed his cheeks and thought of what to say next.

“Garuda, you listen very carefully to me now son. In life, we are the only ones responsible for our dignity – we are the only ones who can decide what will hurt us, and what won’t; we get to decide who hurts us, and who doesn’t. We give that power to those we love and trust, and in life there might be moments where that trust would be misplaced. Your aunt and cousins are one of them. They try to drag us down, because we refuse to be dragged down to their levels. ”

Garuda looked at his mother in awe. Despite her conditions, and despite the way her sister treated her, Garuda had never once seen her mother appear miserable, carrying herself in a way that even a thousand Kadrus couldn’t manage to do. He wanted to be just like her when he grew up.

“Pay no heed to those lying snakes. They are just jealous that you get to fly, while all they can do is burrow inside the earth like worms. Each time they try to hurt you, protect yourself. We might not start fights, but we don’t back away from one either. Protect your honour with all your might beta, for I might not always be there with you.”

“Rich words coming from a slave.” Kadru interjected, standing outside their room. Bedecked with jewels and wearing a shimmering silk sari, Kadru looked every inch the Mother of the Nagas. Vinata wanted to rip out her vocal cords. “Come on slave, its time for my massage. And tell your abominable son to cook food for my children.”

Placing Garuda on the ground and standing up, Vinata bowed and said, “Devi, Garuda is sick today. He appears to have caught a skin infection after being bit by a spider. Besides, the food made by a child might not suit the kumaras’ nutritional needs. I request you to grant him leave for today, so he can recover and serve you better, my ladyship.” Both knew what had happened to Garuda, but while one remained indifferent, the other had to stay mum. Saying those words made Vinata want to vomit. Each day, she, the wife of a saptarishi and a daughter of the first Prajapati, sold her pride to save her son. She had no other option however, and until she found a way to outsmart Kadru, she would do whatever it took to shield her son wherever she could.

“Fine. Then tell him to keep a watch on the cows. That’s the least your pathetic chick can do.” Patting her thigh, Kadru gestured Vinata to follow her. Wiping her hands on a cloth, Vinata was about to leave when Garuda grabbed her hand and said in a small, determined voice, “I will free us mother. I will free us of this curse and I will punish the nagas, and we will go someplace they would never be able to hurt us. Someplace where we will be always together.”

“Leave that to me. All you need to worry about is being a little boy.” Planting a kiss on his forehead and ruffling his head, Vinata left.