#and then i eat and i'm like 'wow! i feel so much better! why didn't i just do that earlier!'

[coffin-ramblings]

In your opinion, what makes Andrew's interest in Ashley romantic rather than just sexual? Love your analyses and wanted your expert opinion, bc personally I'm kinda on the fence about it

I am very flattered that you like my analysts and consider me an expert! It is a great honor to be told that.

The first evidence Andrew is romantically in love with Ashley is this dialogue back in Episode 1. This was actually one of the big reasons why I did not check out Episode 2 for a long while because of how fucking weird Andrew is. I already knew he was weird and actually down bad for Ashley, but that moment really shows how deeply fucked up this guy is. What do you mean you think it's too romantic to commit suicide by jumping off the balcony with your sister? Even Ashley thinks he's weird there.

And then he explains that he thinks it's romantic because that'd mean their bodies would be be entangled together and have to be buried in the same coffin. Despite this, he likes that Ashley wants to join him, which wow, okay dude.

We now fast forward to chapter 2, where we get a lot more of incestuous hints from Andrew.

The first obvious one that you will always see is Andrew checking on Ashley because she's obviously in a bad mood having their burglary thwarted and having to talk with, cook for, and eat with their mother who abandoned them, likely sold them out, and wanted them dead. Ashley doesn't want to talk about it because this confirms her desire to sacrifice them and was hoping she didn't have to say it to Andrew, so she is also frustrated he's not picking that up either and being snappy. Andrew then thinks, "I want to hug her until she smiles", which okay, that's innocuous enough, but is then followed by, "I'm not going to do it, it's another thought that I wish I never had." What kind of thoughts do you have that makes you not want to hug your sister and comfort her Andrew? Isn't it a good thing you want to make her happy especially in this really shit day? And why are you blushing at that thought???

After that, you can have Andrew go talk with their mother and have this gem:

While it's easy to think Andrew thinking, "I don't want to grow fonder of Ashley because she's a bitch" if you see this the first time, notice that he starts blushing there. He very much does not want his romantic desires for Ashley intensified, nor does he ever want to be separated from her as we find out later on at the fireplace if you are on Burial route.

And before that, Andrew eats Ashley's mom-and-dad soup despite his obvious reluctance to and his outright refusal in Decay. He is only doing this to make Ashley happy, when the day before, he was holding back from just hugging her to cheer her up because of the fear that intimacy with Ashley will expose his feelings, which is why Ashley is surprised. That is, quite weirdly, a romantic gesture of Andrew.

And finally, no matter how you get Burial Sane, Andrew is still on better terms with her than before their parents died. Sure he's grumpy and aloof, but he still is happy to be with her and he doesn't start blaming her for their situation. This unnerves Ashley because she now realizes that he doesn't "need" her, but he's still hanging around for who knows how long and she can't guarantee he will stay.

It's easy to think that Andrew's feelings for Ashley is just sexual when the main focus has been Burial Questionable and the confirmation that they can have sex in Decay. Sane often gets neglected for being boring, "pointless", and Ashley being "out of character" for not teasing Andrew about the incest vision, but it is still a major route of the game and is worth analyzing. People often miss the main point of the game is that Andrew's and Ashley's (mostly) platonic relationship is already under a lot of strain due to their mutual distrust that the other will betray and/or leave them, Ashley being too stuck in the past in the most obvious form of being attached to Andy, and Andrew being cold to Ashley because he can't be honest with his affection for her. They have to rebuild their relationship as family and friends first before they can have a relatively healthy romantic relationship. Even after that obstacle, the fear of being rejected for their incestuous feelings is very real and valid when they're also family, and if the other leaves them for that or stops being on good terms with them, they are completely alone and/or heartbroken because they have no one left to love them and for them to love back.

This is why Andrew represses his romantic desire for Ashley, and Ashley can choose to stay platonic with him or tell Andrew that they will not have sex. They are both aware this really is not normal, they are most likely going to be rejected because it's abnormal, and they are afraid of what will happen after rejection. They value each other so much that they will be happy to give up their own desires if it means that they can still have each other around. That is also quite romantic, and needless to say, a very common experience for people who have trouble with confessing or never confessed their feelings to the people they love.

If Andrew merely had sexual feelings for Ashley, he can just keep dating and having sex with other women that look like her and move on. Even though Ashley doesn't like it and resents him for that, at least they still have a relationship, which is better than none at all for Andrew. It is much more difficult for Andrew when he is romantically in love with her, and he actively has to hide it away from her in hopes she won't reject him. He tried to make the best of dating Julia to try to get rid of his romantic and sexual feelings for Ashley, but even that is not enough. As seen in the Voicemails video, he needs to imagine Julia's Ashley to say romantic declarations of love to her, but that makes him sad.

On a more meta level, and one a lot of fans forget, is that TCOAAL is a psychological horror game. It is so much more revolting and well, horrifying that Andrew has romantic feelings for Ashley. My revulsion at Andrew was so strong that I stayed away from the game for months, planning to wait until Episode 3 because I want Julia to show up so I can root for her because neither sibling was sympathetic enough for me. If it was just Andrew being very sexually touchy with Ashley, I and many others would have thought he is sexually abusive or he only sees Ashley as a sex doll, and thus find it easier to root for Ashley and hope she leaves him or retaliates against him. But it is way more fascinating and accurate to a codependency that there is no clear abuser-and-victim or good guy and bad guy dynamic, that the siblings are mutually horrible to each other, but also mutually in love and lust for each other. Nemlei makes their romance an integral part of the game's horror, which is a masterful display of her skill as a creator to blend two seemingly opposite feelings into one work of art.

[natasha-in-space]

Deadass didn't eat anything in over 10+ hours, and I have the nerve to lay there and think 'hmmm, I feel kind of very weak, shaky and unmotivated.... I wonder what could have possibly caused this 🤔'

[kooqitas]

#pairing: bf!jeonghan x virgin!reader.

#genre: smut MINORS DNI | #w.c: ~2500

#synopsis: you decide to question why your boyfriend is avoiding kissing you, you just didn't expect the reason to be so… sexual

#warnings: vaginal sex, unprotected sex, pet names, loss of virginity, fingering, praise kink, eating cum, oral sex, the reader at one point asks him to stop out of embarrassment, use of lube.

#notes: not proofread, english isn’t my first language! soft sex has its value.

★ m.list | inbox :D ;; taglist

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

dating jeonghan sometimes felt like punishment from the universe. he was the most affectionate boyfriend in the world, he treated you so fucking well, he was affectionate in his touches and gestures, he understood you, he spent all the time he could with you, you felt so fucking loved, and of course, he was beautiful, damn, jeonghan was so beautiful that it was unfair, you even thought when they started flirting that he was lying to you, it was inhumane for someone to be pretty like that.

but then, what would be the punishment of the universe? he didn't feel sexual attraction towards you, seriously, it was the only possible explanation, jeonghan never touched you too much, he never insinuated naughty things to you, it seemed like he enjoyed your presence and that was it.

like now, he gave you a few cute kisses on the couch, but soon walked away, hugging you carefully again and paying attention to the movie. it frustrated you like hell, and not even you could explain what made you complain.

"do you want to break up?"

"excuse me?”

"break up, do you want to break up with me, jeonghan?" you asked again, visibly irritated.

"what? no? baby, are you okay?"

"damn, jeonghan, you don't kiss me properly, i’m tired of this! what's going on?"

jeonghan read you easily, so he soon understood what that subject was about, it turns out that the problem wasn't the lack of sexual attraction that your boyfriend had for you, quite the opposite, the problem was the excess of sexual attraction that he had .

“you’re virgin.”

“hm?”

“i don't kiss you properly because…” he took a breath deep. “being too close to you makes me feel things, and i’ll never pressure you into anything, so i think it's better to stay away.”

“wait. what?”

you gasped slightly at your boyfriend's confession, what do you mean kissing you made him feel things? i mean, of course you know exactly what those things were, but, does jeonghan really feel sexual attraction to you and that's why he avoids kissing you?

“i wanna fuck you, so bad. wow, i wanna fuck you like hell to be honest, but i know you've never had this experience so i don't wanna pressure you into anything.”

“fuck me?”

“so bad. that's why i keep moving away from your touches, you're driving me crazy, doll, i'm gonna go crazy because of you.”

you didn't answer your boyfriend, you just kissed him, knowing that he wanted you like that made you a little clouded with lust, you thought the situation was just the opposite.

"alright, alright, doll, calm down!" he laughed with your mouth still attached to his. “i'm really not kidding when i say you're driving me crazy."

"i need your kiss, hannie!"

“fuck!”

your boyfriend mumbled before kissing you the way he did a few weeks ago, his big hands towards your waist, squeezing there tightly as if he intended to leave marks, as if he wanted you to remember that feeling for hours and hours.

jeonghan seemed a little bolder than other times, especially when he pulled you onto his lap, you went without even thinking, and didn't even notice when he started to awkwardly roll around there, you only noticed the atmosphere of things when he moaned against your mouth.

you were scared, not like you didn't know what that moan or that thing growing beneath you meant, on the contrary, you were scared because you knew exactly what it all was.

"it's okay, princess! I'll take care of myself later." jeonghan was gentle as he placed a strand of hair behind your ear and kissed you again boldly.

you had never been in that situation, it was very likely that in the future you would blame your fertile period, and of course, how handsome your boyfriend was and was a good kisser.

but, in a way, you never had any resistance to sex either, it was just a matter of never finding someone who made you 100% comfortable with the idea of ​​taking off your clothes.

well, at least until you met jeonghan.

from the way he kissed you, the way he touched you and moaned against your mouth, even the way he involuntarily lifted his hips against you, fuck, everything made you feel so desired.

you felt his big hands enter your shirt and slowly move up from your belly to your ribs, leaving a not-so-chaste affection there, all while he continued to kiss you. jeonghan needed those touches as much as you did.

“hanie~” you moaned. 

“what, doll?” he kissed your jaw, making you feverish as his thumbs came up to brush against your tits, you had never received that kind of touch, jeonghan smiled when he saw how sly you became with that simple act.

you didn’t say anything else, just relaxed when his thumb finally touched your nipple, moaning against his neck. jeonghan laughed, and fuck, you felt so turned on by his machiavellian laugh.

"is my doll sensitive? god, how will you react when i touch you more..."

jeonghan continued running his thumb there, and you wanted to scream when his index finger came together to pull your nipple, the pleasant sensation of pain with pleasure, it was very different to feel jeonghan do this than to do by your own.

noticing your nonverbal permission, jeonghan pulled your shirt up, and you didn't really notice until he started staring at your breasts, and when you noticed, you tried to cover them, embarrassed.

"no, kitten, don't do that! fuck, you're so beautiful, le’mme put them in my mouth, hm?" jeonghan said kissing your neck, making you forget anything about the damn shame you felt. and when jeonghan finally rolled his tongue around your right nipple you couldn't even think, fuck, that was too much.

your hand entered his hair, pulling hard while you moaned something that even you didn't understand, his tongue surrounding and sucking your nipple with devotion, making you rub yourself even more on his lap. and everything got worse, or better, when he gave a light bite there, eliciting a loud moan from you that made him smile.

"you liked it, didn't you?"

you wanted to tell him to fuck off, you had already talked about you being a virgin, so he knew very well that he was the first person to touch you like that, to be honest, he not only knew but he imagined, fuck, jeonghan lost count of how many times he cum in own hand just imagining how sensitive you would be to his touches.

and there you were, to his happiness, and yours too.

"do you wanna go to my room?"

you were hesitant at first, going to the bedroom would mean letting things get even more intense. of course you were horny, but it was still your first time, you were definitely worried.

"hey, it's okay! we've kissed there several times..." he tried to calm you down.

"not with me without a shirt.”

jeonghan laughed, taking off his shirt too, damn, your boyfriend was so fucking hot. it was the first time you saw your boyfriend without a shirt face to face, damn...

"this makes it worse, not help." you confessed, laughing.

"we're gonna do just what you want, doll."

and so you agreed, letting jeonghan carry you to his bed.

something happened on the way between the sofa and the bed, because jeonghan was much more daring, still careful but cheeky.

he continued sucking your tits, making you lift your hips off the bed in search of more contact while moaning slyly, and then he took two fingers to your mouth, without taking his own mouth off your nipple. you looked at him, not really understanding what he wanted with that, and the answer you got was your boyfriend's dark eyes.

you had never seen jeonghan like this, his look was brimming with lust, that's the truth, you could cum just seeing him like this.

jeonghan kissed you again, removing his fingers from your mouth and cleaning them on your thighs, pressing them there with some force, making you wish more and more that he was touching you somewhere else...

“hannie~” you moaned.

"please, you're gonna drive me crazy moaning like that, i’m trying to have self-control!"

your boyfriend continued to kiss you, his hand groping your body making you shiver and feel chills, you couldn't think of anything else, you didn't even know what you had agreed to when he asked you something that you didn't even understand, but the next minute, your shorts were running down your legs, and despite being shy, you were grateful.

"you're so wet, doll, is this all for me?" you felt your face burn at the question, closing your legs and trying to hide your face with your hand. "no, there's no need to be ashamed, damn it, knowing that you want it the way i want it..."

"what are you doi-" you couldn't finish questioning, jeonghan rubbed his nose against your wet panties before you finished the sentence, making you let out an extremely loud moan, which made him smile.

your moan was the key point for jeonghan to lose even more self control, in the next second he was pushing your panties to the side and running his tongue all over your pussy.

"did you get wet for me? do you want your man to make you cum?"

“hannie… god… hannie, don’t say it!”

"why not?" he said, running his finger over your completely wet cunt. "makes you more horny? that's good, doll, you have to be really relaxed, and open for when i put my cock inside you." jeonghan looked at you as if he knew all of his dirtiest sins. "can i do this, doll? can i prepare you for my cock?"

“p-please…”

you didn't even know what you were asking for please, but it was divine when ejonghan's hot tongue came into contact with your cunt, you arched your hips, whimpering at the new sensation, feeling like you could melt on your boyfriend's tongue and then grabbing his sheet trying to discount what you was feeling.

jeonghan knew exactly what he was doing, every inch of your cunt felt his wet tongue, the new sensation making you whimper with pleasure while he just laughed, enjoying everything. jeonghan added one finger on you, and then two, and by the third you were seeing stars, even more so when he was telling you the whole time that he was just preparing you for his cock.

he spat on your pussy a few times, and the pornographic sound drove you insane, but worse than that was the sound of his tongue playing with you.

you tried to close your legs, your stomach was churning, but jeonghan stopped you, taking his fingers out of you only to lock your legs on the bed, making you moan even more.

"please please!" you tried to push jeonghan away from you, you tried to push his head away, you tried to close your legs. "hannie, please stop, i'll..."

"are you gonna cum for me?"

you knew you would, god it was so embarrassing. you nodded, whimpering in humiliation, trying one last time to get your boyfriend to let go of you, fuck, what if he didn't like the way you tasted?

"then i won't stop, doll! this is the best part... cum in my mouth, princess, your hannie wanna feel you!"

and you don't know if it was your boyfriend's words or how deep he put his tongue in you, but in the next second your legs were shaking around his head, as you came on the hot tongue that kept sucking you. jeonghan didn't stop, he seemed willing to take everything from you, every drop, every tremor, everything.

he laughed when after a few seconds he moved up his body to kiss you, his chin completely wet and you didn't know if it was saliva or his cum.

"you need to prove yourself, love, look how delicious you are!" and then jeonghan kissed you.

and there you were, feeling your boyfriend's saliva mixed with your recent orgasm, and damn, that was delicious.

your breathing was finished, but you wanted more, you continued rubbing yourself against your boyfriend without any shame, missing something of him filling you.

"hey, calm down! we need to breathe..." he joked. “or do you want more? Of course you want it, you want my cock opening your pussy, right?”

"i want more, hannie! please!" you said slyly, still rubbing against your boyfriend.

"god, you're insane, my dirty little girl! do you want more? do you want hannie to fill that pussy?"

"please" you were dizzy, the recent orgasm was still having its effects on your body, but you wanted more, you needed it so much.

and jeonghan would never deny your request.

you watched jeonghan take off his pants and underwear, and you couldn’t help but widen your eyes when you saw the size of his cock, damn, that was big.

it scared you a little, but you still wanted it. jeonghan laughed when he saw your shocked face, taking something from the desk next to the bed: it was a tube of lubricant.

"it will help us." he chuckled as he spread it across the entire length. "i’m gonna fill you up now, doll!"

jeonghan entered slowly, kissing your neck and playing with your nipples as he put every inch inside you, it was a little painful, but nothing unbearable, fingering you and using lube helped a lot.

when jeonghan was finally inside you completely, he withdrew, entering again, and you heard him let out a grotesque moan. damn, you've never felt so horny in your life.

jeonghan continued thrusting, his walls squeezing you as you felt him opening you up more and more.

"fucking hot, damn, i can't believe i’m fucking you.”

you moaned, gripping your boyfriend's shoulders as he bit your neck and went deeper and deeper.

"i’m gonna to fill you up, i'm gonna leave your pussy leaking my cum. my pussy. you're mine. your pussy is mine." jeonghan was still careful, but he wasn't thinking very well, especially given the way he seemed to want to devour you if he could.

the sensation was completely new to you, your fingers and not even jeonghan's would give you that sensation, you felt him inside you, you felt the desire, the heat of his body, fuck, it was too much. you just moaned, begging him not to stop. he laughed.

"let me cum in you? let me cum in that pussy, please."

you just nodded, clouded with pleasure. jeonghan brought his thumb to your clitoris, giving you a new sensation that made your body shiver, and it didn't last long, the next minute you came again, screaming your boyfriend's name for all the neighbors to hear.

with the pressure your pussy exerted, jeonghan came right away, letting you feel the hot liquid paint all your walls white, damn, that felt so fucking good.

you took a breath, and a few minutes later jeonghan went to the kitchen to get you a glass of water

"are you ok? did you like it?" he asked you

"fuck, yes"

"good, because i still wanna fuck you in doggy style, and make you suck my cock!"

[astonmartinii]

a spoonful of sugar | oscar piastri social media au

pairing: oscar piastri x fem chef!reader

cheffing it up all over the calendar

MASTERLIST | TIPS

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 124,509 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: WOAH WHAT IT'S OSCAR'S HOME RACE WEEK? that mean's it's time to whack out the aussie cook book mama piastri got me for christmas and man this fish has a cool name. BARRAMUNDI is a fish very commonly used in aussie cuisine (real ones know it from masterchef australia). so here i've pan seared it with some herbs and some lemons and take it from me it SLAPS, but you know what i hope slaps more? oscar this weekend... LET'S GO BABY

[as always this recipe is on my website and will be in my 2024 f1 calendar recipe book coming out soon]

view all comments

user1: FAVES OMG PARENTS

user2: my favourite thing is where i read intently all of y/n's recipe and continue to make pot noodles

yourusername: pot noodles are good i can't even be mad

oscarpiastri: can confirm it did in fact SLAP

yourusername: oh wow piastri stamp of approval that's basically a michelin star

oscarpiastri: tbf i would eat a roll of paper towels if it was you who gave it to me

yourusername: okay.... I'LL TAKE IT

user3: can we please study these people cause why is saying you'd eat paper towels is the pinnacle of romance

user4: i NEED the recipe book STAT

landonorris: i was on board with this whole cooking thing but FISH IS WHERE I DRAW THE LINE

yourusername: oh boy we got a BABY ON THE LINE

landonorris: i'm allowed to like what i like my MUM said so

yourusername: bro is an elite athlete and exclusively eats chicken nuggies

landonorris: @oscarpiastri tell your girlfriend to stop bullying me

oscarpiastri: i'm on her side buddy maybe explore the culinary world

landonorris: that's it i'm going to HR

yourusername: try it girly the mclaren HR team LOVE my food

user5: the dynamics since oscar and y/n got comfortable in the sport are my favourite things

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, landonorris and 793,288 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri: first time on the podium at my home race and the feeling is unreal. so thankful to have my family and love of my life around me, lets keep building on this !!

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user7: THANK THE LORD MCLAREN KEPT THEIR SHIT TOGETHER IN 2024 OSCAR FIRST WIN COMING IN FAST

yourusername: I AM TOTALLY FINE ABOUT THIS AND I AM NOT SOBBING UNCONTROLLABLY BECAUSE I AM SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU AT ALL TIMES I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

oscarpiastri: I LOVE YOU TOO SO MUCH AND I LOVE SHARING THIS WITH YOU AND SEEING THE WORLD WITH YOU AND REACHING OUR DREAMS TOGETHER

user8: are they good?

logansargeant: from the man currently waiting for them to go to dinner and can hear them yelling this stuff to each other... no they are not okay and i don't think they ever have been

yourusername: LOGIE BEAR I AM SORRY I CANNOT CONTAIN MY LOVE FOR OSCAR

oscarpiastri: jealous bitches gonna be bitter

logansargeant: ??? excuse me

oscarpiastri: i'm sorry i got excited... love you logan (just not as much as y/n)

user9: this comment section is once again making me want to sneak into an F1 after party :(

user10: they're just going to dinner they've not even started drinking yet 😭

landonorris: i am proud of you mate - why is y/n dancing around in the kitchen in an apron that says "this chef FUCKS"

yourusername: fashion. (it says oscar piastri in small print right under that)

landonorris: i didn't need to know that

oscarpiastri: let her dance it makes the food taste even better

landonorris: there's definitely no fish right?

yourusername: no fish by order of the fussy child

landonorris: bullying online and in person @maxverstappen1 @charles_leclerc @logansargeant STEP IN

maxverstappen1: eh i'm good i'm looking forward to dinner

charles_leclerc: you're on your own with this one lando

logansargeant: i've learnt not to cross y/n

user11: the piastris invited lando, logan and the rest of the podium? i am soft

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 162,994 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: a big post podium celebration dinner at the piastri house to celebrate oscar's home podium. first off, super duper proud. second, since it was a strictly no fish evening, i decided to go for classic aussie meat pies and grilled kangaroo LOL but there was only clean plates at the end so i'll defo consider adding it to the recipe book

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user12: i am getting a sugar rush this is so sweet

logansargeant: thank you for having me, a solid 9/10 - one point docked because kangaroos are cute

yourusername: wait until you run into one on a cold, wet evening

oscarpiastri: they are actually very scary and have a stealing problem

yourusername: tbf i think we all have a stealing problem

oscarpiastri: you definietly do ... cause you stole my heart

logansargeant: EW NOT ON MY COMMENT THREAD

user13: i'm so lonely

maxverstappen1: i definitely did not think i was going to eat kangaroo this week but here we are

yourusername: did you like it?

maxverstappen1: i was shocked at how much i did

oscarpiastri: babe get that on the review cover of the recipe book this guy got three championships that has to mean something

yourusername: good idea i'm on it

maxverstappen1: ???

landonorris: you fed me kanga and roo from winnie the pooh? Y/N YOU FED ME KANGA AND ROO FROM WINNIE THE POOH?

yourusername: you eat chicken all the time and you don't feel sorry for chicken little

oscarpiastri: she ate you up there PUN INTENDED

landonorris: i've learnt my lesson i'm giving up here

charles_leclerc: i for one had a blast and will be asking for y/n to cater my birthday party

oscarpiastri: FOR A PRICE

charles_leclerc: you her guard dog or something?

oscarpiastri: duh? have you seen her?

yourusername: i would love to (idk monagasque cuisine though so give me notice)

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 152,339 others

tagged: oscarpiastri, logansargeant

yourusername: IMOLA, IMOLA MY HEART LIVES IN ITALIA AND MY STOMACH LIVES WITH ITALIAN FOOD. for real. the track is cute and whatnot but the real star is the pasta, the pizza, the gelato but most importantly the PASTA. here is two dishes that'll feature in the imola chapter: a burrata dish and a ragu !! oscar (and lando) certified so you know it's good, oscar even helped so it's defo beginner friendly!!

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user17: is it a collective f1 driver experience to be ass at cooking

danielricciardo: yes

maxverstappen1: yes

oscarpiastri: yes

landonorris: yes

charles_leclerc: YES

oscarpiastri: if i'm slow this weekend it's because i couldn't stop eating the ragu sorry mclaren

yourusername: i made sure no gelato until sunday so please don't take me out back and shoot me over giving him pasta

mclarenf1: bring some pasta for social media admin and no one has to know

yourusername: deal

landonorris: this is a public instagram comment section

charles_leclerc: why is mine always so darn crunchy

yourusername: inpatient, common amongst you drivers. oscar was once so impatient when boiling an egg he got it out and it was just watery egg

oscarpiastri: you said you wouldn't tell anyone :(

yourusername: no babe i'm proud !!! you've come so far

oscarpiastri: it's true i made my own omelette the other day :)

yourusername: and it was yummy

oscarpiastri: and it was yummy :)

user18: the positive affirmations in this relationship really keep me going

yourusername: he IS the MOST beautiful racer in all of the lands

oscarpiastri: she IS the PRETTIEST chef in all of the kitchens

oscarpiastri

liked by alexalbon, yourusername and 775,431 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri: not the race we wanted in spain, but we're still in good spirits and in the conversation at the top of the standings! also helps that when you get taken out of the race your girlfriend shovels the BEST paella ever into your mouth until you finally smile

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user19: bro got a girlfriend and personal chef all in one

yourusername: food is my love language and when babe gets twatted into the barriers by SOMEONE i will personally feed him some of his favourite food

user20: she's holding back

yourusername: PR said i couldn't say anything...

oscarpiastri: i love youuuuuuuuu and i love your paella i think it's laced with crack

logansargeant: @fia GET HIS ASS

yourusername: LOGIE BEAR?

logansargeant: i'm sorry, we're pretty desperate for the p7 here at williams

yourusername: i respect that

oscarpiastri: Y/N????

yourusername: MORE PAELLA

carlossainz55: big respect for the paella, definitely looks authentic

yourusername: OBVIOUSLY IT'S AUTHENTIC DO YOU THINK MY QUALIFICATIONS ARE A JOKE

yourusername: lol sorry thank you actually SPANISH F1 DRIVER APPROVED PAELLA

oscarpiastri: @fernandoalo_oficial can we get another good review please and thank you

fernandoalo_oficial: looks good, need a taste to be sure

yourusername: it's coming your way (please return the tupperware tho please)

mclarenf1: you'll come back stronger oscar 💪

oscarpiastri: fuelled by love and paella

yourusername: fuelled by VENOM AND THE WILL TO WIN AND CRUSH THE COMPETITION

oscarpiastri: and that 🫶

note: here's a short and sweet one that MAY return to finish out this fictional season ... i also just love this kind of set up for an imagine. it's a lil short i know but the CHRISTMAS CRAFTS ARE COMING IN FAST AND THE CROSS STITCH CHRISTMAS CARDS ARE SLAYING THE HOUSE DOWN

[buckgasms]

Bucky with a reader who reads smutty books?

She's perfected a straight face reading technique for when she's sat in public reading filth. Bucky thinks she reads innocent shit like fairy tales or soemthing so he buys her books like that (she loves his effort but finds them so boring that they live perminantley on the shelf in their living room).

One day she leaves the book open in the living room while she pops to the toilet and he picks it up to see what all the fuss is about. She comes back to him blushing like mad on the sofa reading the smuttiest smut of all smut and looking up at her like 😳 "this your sorta thing huh?" And while he isn't jealous that she reads that he finds it strange that she hid it from him. He asks her to show him what she finds so hot about it and they get to baby making ;)

-🐰

Hey 🐰! Hope you've been ok?

Yes I like this very much. I'm picturing a sort of Avengers Bucky boyfriend because we know what happens when Daddy finds Princess' smutty book 🫣

I imagine the confusion starts because all the covers have various fairytale-esque pictures. You'd just need to look a bit closer to realise they were slightly off!

When he asks why you didn't mention it, you just ramble about how you didn't want to be weird and if he thought it was too kinky or whatever you were happy to just keep it to yourself.

He just tuts, flipping through the pages and reads the bit you just were. I'm imagining it's a red riding hood book where the big bad wolf is eating her, but just in a very different way.

"Wow. He's really working on her there huh? And you keep a straight face when you're reading this stuff?"

You giggle and nod but he keeps flicking through and you sense that perhaps he's a little miffed about something. So you crawl over and climb into his lap, throwing the book to one side.

"Are you mad about my book Bucky?" You say softly, running your hands over his chest and rolling your hips gently.

He grunts a little and can't resist holding on to your hips and squeezing gently at your waist.

"No" he pouts, "just wish you woulda told me you like that stuff... Coulda been doing...." He peters off but you can't let that slide.

"Wait, could have been doing what Bucky? You wanna be my big bad wolf?" You grip his face and lean down to kiss him, not missing the way his hips push upwards, enjoying the way his fingers stroke down your neck and move to grip your waist.

"I dunno, what is it you want me to do?"

You sit back on his lap and grab the book, flicking through as he massages little circles on your hips.

"Well I guess in this one... He chases her a little, and rips her dress off.... Oh and there's a bit where he pins her down and yknow...licks at her..."

You look up from the book and see Bucky staring at you with a devilish look in his eyes.

"Well then little red, you better get running..."

You giggle but he pulls you in closer and whispers in your ear, "or I'll fuck ya right here..." Before scraping his teeth across your soft skin.

You squeal as you leap from his lap and pelt down the corridor to the lift that will take you to your floor. You see him coming round the corner as you make it, slamming on the 'close door' button as he approaches, a big grin on his face.

You sigh as the doors slide shut and then you have the agonising wait to reach your floor. It's only a few floors down, but you wonder how long it will take him to catch up.

Before you have much time then doors slide open and the corridor is eerily quiet. You can't hear any sound other than the low hum of the lift.

You tentatively step out and make to run to your shared apartment with Bucky. You get a few steps to the door when you feel a metal hand grip your mouth and a strong arm wrap around your waist, holding you tight.

"Gotcha..."

📚

He ripped your dress to pieces and pinned you down on the floor, barely making it into the apartment before he was dragging your heat to his face and devouring you. All you could do was cling to the rug as he sucked, nibbled and licked at your sensitive folds.

He carries his prize to the bedroom and puts you on your knees, ass in the air and places your book in front of you.

"Read it. Out loud..."

You flush furiously as you hear his zipper being pulled down and the mattress dip as he settles behind you.

As you begin to read his cock is dragged along your pussy, teasing you and torturing you as you struggle to read.

"Buckkky..." You whine as he presses his leaking tip just a little inside, but he stops and lands so swats onto your ass.

"Come on babygirl, I wanna know what happens. I'm pretty invested in the plotline now yknow..."

You pant and moan but manage to keep reading, describing how the wolf/man fucks the heroine, claiming her body as his, biting and bruising her delicate body. His big cock stretching her wide, hitting parts that no one has been able to before.

The book falls from your grip as he pounds into you. It was a bit of a head rush to have your incredibly hot boyfriend enacting smut and you let out a long, happy moan as he pulls you upwards, spearing his cock deeper, hitting more sensitive places with unrelenting lust.

"Oh my god Bucky.... Please, can I come please?"

He growls in your ear and uses his metal hand to grip your throat, squeezing slightly making your eyes roll. You cling onto the cool metal for dear life, as you crash into your peak, screaming out for him.

You both fall forward, Bucky managing to prop himself up to avoid squishing you, but as your walls continue to flutter around him, he can't hold himself any longer and falls down on top of you.

You giggle and wiggle until you have him resting on your chest, fingers running through his hair as he presses kisses to your soft skin.

📚

Omg imagine if this happened 🫣 also I may need to go back to writing ABO stuff because 🤤

[justwinginglife]

Gimme a oneshot of Reader who doesn't have any experience in love so she panics when she gets feelings for Hoshina, giving him random things (a nice rock, random vegetables, ect.) And randomly blurts out embarrassing compliments "YOUR MUSCLES LOOK VERY NICE TODAY VICE CAPTAIN SIR" before she just fucking books it out of there.

I love you so much bestie. I will do this for you 100%, thanks for always matching my freak.

The Thing About Being In Love

You always thought you wouldn't know love if it hit you in the face. But then you fell in love and felt like you just couldn't stop taking hits. You had no idea how to process your feelings, no idea how to convey those feelings in a way that made sense, and no idea how to stop those feelings from overflowing.

The thing about being in love with Soshiro Hoshina was that your feelings always made themselves known to him before you wanted them to. Before you could even think about what you needed to say and how you needed to say it, you words were already tumbling out in a chaotic jumble. They always did. And it made you love him even more that he never judged you for it. He'd just smile the same sweet smile again and you could feel yourself falling deeper and deeper.

When you first met him, you made quite the first impression- after reflexively reaching out to ruffle his hair because you just needed to know if it was as soft as it looked, you earned yourself 50 push-up's and his undying attention going forward. He wanted to know more about the girl who'd said fuck it to all manner of decorum and propriety, ignoring the chain of command to satisfy her desires. It wasn't until he got to know you better that he realized that you just couldn't control yourself.

He'd been particularly amused when you'd complimented the way his muscles looked in his favorite compression shirt (it was his favorite only because you'd complimented him in it). In fact, you'd noticed that he'd started wearing it more frequently around you after you made comments on it the first time around. And you just couldn't stop making comments on it every time after that.

"Oh, wow... your back muscles are gorgeous, can I touch them?" You yanked your hand back before you actually did touch him and scurried off, red in the face.

"Your abs look so solid... shit, I'm drooling." You shook your head aggressively, wiped your mouth, and ran off again.

One time you'd even had the nerve to say "Do you think you could wear me like that shirt?" Immediately after, you slapped a hand over your mouth and bolted like you were on fire.

And when you'd taken up gardening for fun, after harvesting a bunch of potatoes, you wondered if Hoshina liked potatoes which led you spiraling down the rabbit hole, wondering if he was eating enough. So, of course, you made the walk to his apartment in your gardening overalls and offered him the potato, still covered in dirt. He took it, stunned, and watched as you proceeded to walk away as if you'd never been there in the first place. Little did he know, you were embarrassed that you'd trudged over to him, still caked in mud, just to present him with the most underwhelming of gifts. You still didn't know how you got these ideas in your head and why your body executed them before your mind could properly protest.

Then there was the time that someone had painted a smiley face on a rock and placed it near the sidewalk by your house- it had reminded you of his warm smile and you'd given it to him in the middle of a training session. Despite your malfunctioning brain, your strength and your skill were actually quite impressive, and he always enjoyed a good spar with you. It wasn't until he had you pinned to the ground that you felt the rock digging into your leg and you'd pulled it out of your pocket and gifted it to him right then and there. He did more than smile that time, he actually laughed. You flushed, wondering if he was going to make fun of you for once, but he didn't. He took the rock gleefully and even named it after you. You started giggling and soon, the two of you were just collapsed on the floor, filled with laughter.

At least some good could come out of these random bursts of affection and you wouldn't trade these precious little moments with him for the world. The thought that you were the one that made him smile and laugh like this, it filled you with the most genuine sense of happiness even if you were embarrassed at how you'd done it.

At some point, Hoshina thought he'd have some fun with the situation- he didn't want you to feel left out after all, and he wanted to compliment you too.

So he started running up to you, yelling something like "Your hair looks very pretty today!" or "Those curves of yours are looking mighty fine!" and then dart off; even though he wasn't embarrassed, he wanted to keep the same energy as you. It made you laugh. And he loved when you laughed.

And then it got easier and easier to be around him. You weren't stumbling over your words anymore, you were proclaiming them with pride.

"Thought you could hide those biceps from me forever, huh, Hoshina? Let me get a good look." You even had the nerve to fucking wink at him.

He'd smirk and flex them at you, then blow you a kiss.

And you went on and on like this, flirting with him, laughing with him, stealing little moments with him anywhere you could. The thing about being in love with Soshiro Hoshina was that your feelings always made themselves known to him. But somehow, someway, through all the awkward encounters, all the stammered words, all the heavy breaths threatening to collapse your trembling lungs, your feelings found their way into his heart. And he guarded them like they were his treasure. And he reciprocated them tenfold.

One day, he said the cheesiest thing about how when you had kids he'd have the best story to tell them about how you met and how you started falling for each other and you teased him for being so corny, but that was the day you knew you'd marry him.

Because the thing about being in love with Soshiro Hoshina is that it's the best feeling in the world, but being loved by Soshiro Hoshina is even better.

[ryin-silverfish]

I really like Azure Lion as a character. Yeah, you can stop following me now. /j

But no, seriously, I like how LMK has adapted this particular character, given him way more potential complexity than his novel counterpart——not that it's a high bar, the LCR trio of JTTW are just demon warlords living in a literal human slaughterhouse.

Which is why I deeply dislike the take that "Oh, Azure manipulated SWK into fighting the JE! He's just using him like a pawn!" Like, wow, way to completely butcher two characters' personality and agency in one go.

Such takes reduce SWK to some innocent kid, when he is at most an impulsive, daring teenager who haven't met a single real obstacle so far——he robbed the dragon kings blind, and they couldn't do a thing! He struck his name and all his monkeys' names off the Book of Life and Death! What couldn't he do?

And Azure's failing isn't him telling a toddler: "You know what? Driving your tricycle into oncoming traffic will be real fun, trust me kiddo." It's letting his friend go way over the speed limit and not telling him that he should maybe, y'know, slow down, bc he'd seen his epic driving skills, SWK's the bestest driver he ever met, surely nothing would happen!

(And also, no one in that car is sober, except Macaque.)

What I'm getting at here is, even without Azure, SWK is not gonna be content with sitting on his mountain, eating peaches forever. Hell, he sure doesn't in the novel, where his demon king brothers are little more than namedropped NPCs.

He is always gonna want more, chase after greater destinies, drown out that existential ennui and fear of death at the back of his mind with bigger and bigger power-ups and the laughters of his companions.

He told himself he would be content after getting this one thing he wanted. That he could stop at any time. But alas, like any ADHDer, he will not stop at this one exciting thing, and sooner or later, the boredom sets in, and he gets ideas and impulsively leaps into making them reality.

That is the Mind Monkey at his worst: being a whirlwind of chaos, while unknowingly enslaved to his own chaotic mind.

(In the book, this is Wu Cheng'en's reminder to the reader that, even though you shouldn't keep your heart constantly under lock and keys, Neo-Confucian style, the other extreme——letting it go completely wild, disregarding all external rules and consequences, can be equally disastrous.)

And when that car was driven through the Celestial Palace's front door, off a bridge, and straight into a ditch, it was him in the driver's seat, steering the wheels the whole time.

Everyone else in that car failed terribly as friends when they didn't voice any objections, or try to get him off the driver's seat, or realize that cheering and egging him on is an awful idea, however genuine their blind trust was.

Like, they are certainly not helping, and made the situation much, much worse. If you let your buddy drive while under influence and hand him more beers in the car, even if you are also drunk out of your mind and aren't actively trying to get him into a traffic accident, you are a shitty, irresponsible friend.

But the thing is? SWK is still responsible for the consequences of his decisions. He could have stopped, by his own volition, and no one was holding a gun to his head and forcing him to drive. He, too, wanted this.

That, to me, makes a much more interesting narrative than "Poor innocent baby SWK was puppeted into becoming the Great Sage in Heaven by shady blue cat, how awful!"

Oh, and since I'm feeling particularly salty today, I'll also ask some last questions: is SWK so weak-willed and devoid of self-agency to you that he couldn't even OWE his most famous title, the Great Sage in Heaven, 100%, without being manipulated into it?

Is SWK so immature and unintelligent to you that he is incapable of being a genuine idealist or rebel, that he cannot agree, out of the depth of his heart, that the Celestial Realm sucks balls and needs better management?

TL;DR: Havoc! Era Azure Lion isn't some cult leader brainwashing this kid into becoming his figurehead. He's the dumbass who's too busy staring at his teenage crush to care about the blaring police sirens.

Also, I had a bit of an epiphany after writing this: why am I so annoyed by people reading Azure's idealization of SWK as him intentionally manipulating and love-bombing him? Because it is a very western and modern reading.

For someone with traditional Confucian beliefs, it is perfectly normal——it is what you are supposed to feel, as a liege who has found your just and virtuous lord.

If Romance of the Three Kingdoms existed back then, he would probably describe himself as the Guan Yu to SWK's Liu Bei, however wonky the analogy was.

(Gosh, now I want a "Four Classics read each other" crossover.)

I'm not saying it is healthy or wise. But under this context, putting your lord on a pedestral was normalized, and even encouraged, as the virtue of a righteous gentleman. It was the sort of ideals romanticized culture-wide. NOT having such beliefs would probably make you look weird.

And since the Celestial Realm in the novel is a parody of Confucian hierarchy in a Daoist trenchcoat, it was really no surprise that an idealistic ex-celestial soldier would hold the same beliefs.

To torture the analogy further, the problem is that he was trying to be the Guan Yu to SWK's Liu Bei, when the Brotherhood had more in common with the Bandits of the Marsh, down to their giant downer ending.

[a-d-nox]

nox tests hypotheses: "saturn tells you what annoys you"

this is one of shawtyherbs hypotheses. this is how i feel this manifests for me in my chart and why i believe this hypothesis works. my saturn is located in my 3h, in taurus at 29°... let's take deep dive!

taurus saturn

a lack of discipline: i feel like i have a strong work ethic - i value hard work. i despised when i did group work in school and i was paired up with procrastinators or people who were unwilling to put in the necessary effort to achieve a good grade. it felt like every time i had my part done i would start getting anxious that the other person/people didn't. it felt like a manipulation - like we were playing chicken. if they didn't do it, would i do it for them? how long did they have to wait until i stepped in?

instability and unpredictability: sudden changes, chaotic environments, and erratic behavior can make me uncomfortable, anxious, and annoyed. i guess it's sort of like a trauma response from childhood except now i get irritable... everyone know my dislike for surprises.

wastefulness: i get easily irritated by wastefulness, whether it's wasting time, money, or resources. again maybe its from my childhood and having those experiences. but i am the type of person who arrives on time. if i buy something and don't like it i use it until it's gone, i eat it til its gone (even if its stale), or i use it til its paid itself off (if i buy a shirt and can't return it and it was $30, i am wearing it 30 times). it sounds strange - i know - but it is how i am...

superficiality: i really value authenticity. i feel like i am easily annoyed by superficial behavior, materialism without substance, and people who put on mask to fit in... like so what if you don't laugh at someone's shit joke, so what if i am happy with my hydroflask and want nothing to do with a stanley (it's all the same to me), and who cares if your true self is not everyone's favorite (you'll find your people a whole lot faster if you're your self).

resisting practicality: you know how much advice i have given throughout the years THAT WAS ASKED FOR and people did what they wanted anyway??? why even waste my time if you don't want outside perspective. or something its just kind advice to help with ease like hi you are using a stain on the deck, i recommend you wipe as you go so it dries quicker and you don't accidentally smear/smudge later. but nooooo.....

saturn at 29°

arrogance: you know it's okay to be wrong... it's not okay to pontificate about how you were right in some alternate scenario. just admit you were wrong in this situation and move on or better yet say nothing...

irresponsibility: when you say you are going to do something do it. if you are a leader then lead and know that you are responsible for anything you designate to someone you view as your subordinate (especially when you don't train them on what you want them to do for you). if you can't commit to having a task or being in charge than don't do it. someone is relying on you - it's 10 times worse when its yourself and you push goals to the side.

unfounded claims/criticisms: perhaps i am overly sensitive to criticism because i tend to take my work and my self a bit too seriously. but if you can't take yourself and what you do seriously, then who will? i take everything personally too. so when i get criticism and its said in a nasty way (at least how i interpret it) or there is a lack of explanation or no backing i will get annoyed. you bet my humor will be ill-tempered... you can't expect me to react well to a comment like "you're wrong". like wow okay so detailed, i'm glad you decided to write one word and a contraction to dismiss my 2k essay. like if you are going to criticize me or disprove me make it detailed and make it sound. and if i do something wrong its probably because no one told me how to do it in the first place (cough cough work) so don't snap at me, walk me through it.

lack of respect: now listen - i'm no angel, i was a teenager once - eyerolls and all. but now that i am a bit older (she said at 23) i am getting to the point where respect isn't freely given (unless its to build a good first impression) but instead its earned in a pre-existing relationship. i don't tolerate disrespect, no one is going to snap at me and tell me what to do. you do that and you will get the opposite reaction that you expect from me (speaking from real life situations). asserting dominance doesn't make you worthy of respect, it makes you a bully.

3h

superficial conversations: i said it why back when in one of my get to know me posts. i prefer deep, meaningful conversations and i find small talk / superficial chatter frustrating or pointless. like skip to the meat bruv - we don't have all this time for "hi how are you?" "good how are you?"

disorganization: a lack of structure, whether in communication, in a learning environments, or my daily routines, irritates me. i feel like it effects me most in the routine bit. weekends are my prime culprit because my schedule falls apart. during the week my meals and tasks are standardized, but on the weekend, i somehow manage to always get annoyed because i eat lunch late or what i had in my mind to do gets tossed aside...

gossip/rumors: i feel uncomfortable with gossip, i prefer facts and reliable knowledge. which i know facts seems shaky when i am posting the content i do... but generally facts over fiction in conversations. gossip and the like almost always gets me in trouble - i struggle with holding my tongue especially when i see someone regularly who has been gossiped about frequently. withholding information is a form of lying in my opinion - and lying makes me extremely uncomfortable.

impulsive decisions: i am trying to get better about this because i tend to carefully deliberate everything. but i don't like when others around me make impulsive decisions that effect me because it ruins the plan i already had in my mind. for example, last weekend i wanted to go to an all day fall festival with my mother (and yes i told her tuesday my plan) but last minute my mother's boyfriend-not-boyfriend said he needed her help with a project and it was going to be an all weekend thing. so friday night my plan went out the window. so quickly had to make a new plan consisting of paid readings, trader joe's, and shampooing my couch (fun stuff i know...).

a lack of respect for rules/boundaries: a disregard for social norms, etiquette, and established rules of communication annoys me so badly. like it is common courtesy (at least for how i was raised) to call or write in advance of stopping over at someone's house. my mother's boyfriend-not-boyfriend is the biggest perpetrator of this behavior. they aren't technically dating anymore so hello hi in my opinion he should be giving us a heads up if he will be stopping over. also switching gears when i say "no" or "i don't want to" i feel like a lot of people around me push me and test me to see if i will change my tune. i don't appreciate that in the slightest. i make clear boundaries in all the relationships i have (even here i have guidelines) - so yes, you bet i get frustrated when i vocalized or wrote my boundaries and yet they get ignored.

do you have a hypothesis you want me to test? or perhaps you want me to build a hypothesis for something you've been wondering about where astrology is concerned? please use my "suggest a post topic" button if you want to see it happen!

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[exhaslo]

I love your work so muchhhh <333

Can you do one where it's like you and Miguel are dating and it's only been like a couple weeks and he finds out you have an eating disorder and he is really supportive :)

(Also can't wait for more of puzzle pieces I love it <<<333)

Awe thank you!!! Also, sorry this was so late, holiday season got me working like crazy!

Also, not sure which eating disorder you want me to write, so I'll write this one based off a personal one.

Warning: Mentions of eating disorder, fluff

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Am I pretty enough for him?

Am I thin enough?

Am I even good enough?

A shudder escaped your lips as you stared at yourself in the mirror. Yet another day went by as these raging thoughts consumed your mind. No matter how perfect your life was. No matter how perfect of a boyfriend you had. You always worried that you were still not good enough.

Your stomach rumbled, causing you to groan lowly. You had skipped breakfast and were now planning on skipping lunch. You needed to get thinner. You wanted to be perfect for Miguel. You wanted people to believe that you were good enough for him.

You glanced at yourself once more in the mirror. You looked fine. As long as you looked the part, it was fine. Checking the time once more, you hurried. Miguel was going to pick you up and take you out on a date.

Hopefully there won't be a dinner option.

--------

There was a dinner option.

You kept your smile towards your loving boyfriend as Miguel walked you into a nice restaurant. You were so happy to find someone like him. Miguel was tall, strong, handsome and so kind to you. No one had ever checked all of those boxes.

"Wow, this place is beautiful. How'd you find this place, Miguel?" You asked, staring in awe at the architeceture.

"Well, I get a lot of recommendations from my coworkers that I usually tune out," He told you.

You chuckled lowly, finding his dull humor cute and funny. Miguel worked at Alchemax, one of the largest companies in the world. He was a great scientist, honestly an actual genius for his age. All the more reason why you had to be perfect for him.

All eyes were on Miguel. He was well known for what he did at Alchemax, that and he was the CEO's son; something that he did not like to admit. So money was also not an issue for him. Another secret box you had to check off.

"Order whatever you want. I was told the food here is amazing," Miguel said as he started with a drink. You hesitated,

"Oh, I'm not really hungry. Maybe just an appetizer." You lied. Miguel watched you order a water,

"Are you sure?"

"Yep!"

--------

Miguel kept staring at you as you scanned the menu. He furrowed his brows, observing your every movement. Miguel did not want to say anything yet, especially not in public. Instead, Miguel decided to order a bunch of food for himself.

"All of that?" You nearly gasped. Miguel resisted a chuckle,

"I had a long morning. Need to refuel, you can help yourself to try any of it." He offered.

Miguel saw your hesitated smile before you refused his offer. Once the table side bread came in, Miguel watched as you nearly drooled for them. He swore there were tears forming as you held back from eating. As concerned as he was, Miguel knew better than to ask you here.

He didn't want you to cry in public. Miguel didn't want to hurt you in anyway. There had to be a reason why you were holding back. Miguel was understanding. He wanted to know what you were thinking. What you were feeling.

"Wow, everything smells so good," You whispered as the waiter placed the mountain of food in front of the two of you.

"Enjoy," Miguel hummed as he stared at your salad, "Hm, looking at it now, I don't think I can eat all of this alone."

"B-But why did you order so much?!"

"It looked and sounded good," Miguel chuckled towards your reaction.

You looked so cute when you were eager to try something new. You were just perfect to Miguel. The smile on your face as you did anything new with him was enough. Just your touch alone was enough for Miguel.

You were the best thing that had ever happened to him.

And Miguel wanted to make sure that he was being a good boyfriend to you.

----------

Dinner was both amazing, yet horrible. Your stomach was hurting so much because you were starving. All of that food just made you want to cry. It looked so good, but if you even took a bite, you knew that you would gain so much weight.

"(Y/N), now that we're alone, may I ask you something?" Miguel asked softly as you sat in his car.

"Sure,"

"Why are you forcing yourself to starve?" His voice was low as he turned to face you, "You look exhausted, baby, and pale. I'm worried for your health."

"Ah-"

You were at a loss for words. Before you could even process a response in your mind, your tears rolled down like a broken dam. Your chest tighten and burned as you tried to control yourself. Your breathing shallow as you whimpered those sad sobs you've been holding back.

"Baby, don't cry. Come here," Miguel pulled you into his embrace, rubbing your back, "How long have you been holding this in?"

"I-I just...I'm not good enough for you. I need to lose weight. I'm too fat." You sobbed into his chest. Miguel stroked your hair,

"You're perfect," Miguel sighed softly, thinking about his words very carefully, "Starving yourself isn't the way to lose weight. You're just hurting yourself."

"It's the only way I can. I...I can't eat anything or..."

"(Y/N), eating a healthy meal won't make you gain weight. No matter what you look like, I will always love you."

"I...But-"

"How about this, for every meal I eat...You eat." Miguel offered, wiping your tears away with his thumb.

Your heart raced with fear as you looked at Miguel. You couldn't eat. You just couldn't. You were convinced that everything was going to make you gain weight. You had to eat less. You needed to lose weight for him.

"You're perfect, (Y/N). My perfect girl," Miguel whispered as he pecked your lips, "It hurts seeing you in pain."

"You say that now...But when I'm overweight-"

"I'll love you just the same." Miguel said firmly, "We'll start slow. Easy and simple foods then we can move on to bigger meals, okay?"

"...Small...right?"

"Yes, small."

You fiddled with your thumbs as Miguel kept comforting you. You could still feel how hot your cheeks were from crying. Your eyes stung and you were parched. Sniffling lowly, you glanced at your wonderful boyfriend,

"...I am...a little hungry..." You whispered. Miguel smiled as he put his seatbelt on,

"Is soup a good small start for you?"

"I'd like that,"

--------

From then on, Miguel helped you eat more little by little. With each meal he praised you and comforted your looks. Miguel helped your self esteem every day. His loving comments and actions helped you finally eat normally.

Eventually, you were finally able to look in the mirror without shame.

Sometimes you still had those thoughts of starving yourself, but you had Miguel to wash them away.

You were fine, just the way you are.

Always will be.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hope you enjoyed it! Like mentioned, I just used a personal issue of mine since I wasn't sure what disorder you wanted to me write about since everyone has something different.

But to those of you out there struggling, I know it hard. I still sometimes starve myself, but you're not alone! Please eat something! Start small! When in doubt, soup is my always go too!

Especially Pho. I will eat the shit out of Pho.

Anyway, stay safe and healthy out there!!

[factual-fantasy]

27 asks! Thank you!! :}} 🔮

Oooo very cool! I hope you have fun with it!! :DDD And as for how I make a story it kind'a depends-

For Grimace, Sylvester and the rest of the gang.. well that was just my Violet team. I gave them personalities that I thought would suit them and just.. went from there I guess? <:D

For Conkeldurr, Zuora, Emboar and the 4 piglets.. well, it started with just thinking about Conkeldurr and how much I like that Pokémon. I pictured him as a Gentle giant and imagined how fun it would be to draw him with some other tiny Pokémon that he adopted. I went through the Unovan pokédex and picked a Zuora because she was small and fluffy <XD

After making a post about them I wanted to give Conkeldurr a friend. Well I like the Emboar line so hey why not do that? She can be a mama Emboar to switch it up and she can have 4 kids. Why not? Since I didn't draw her in that first post, I made the story they they went their separate ways for a time but now they're back together.

I honestly don't have solid concrete advice I can offer- I just think "hey this would be neat" and slap it on there. Or I think "hey this scenario would be fun to draw" and so I structure the events and story to make the characters run into this scenario in a reasonable way. That's really all I do.. <:D

@beryl-shade

I've seen Markiplier play it :0 Its.. well its something! <:D

(Referencing this post)

<XD I never understood why they made him Spanish, the sudden guitar noise is always a jumps care XDDD

@shiny-is-miney

Humans do not exist in any of my Octonauts AUs, nor have they ever <:/

@catain-skyler1987

I do not <:/ sorry!

@nwo-metalscottic

Daww,, thank you 🥹🥹🥹its been rough these past.. how ever many months- my health is still poor and I still am glued to my bed/the couch 24/7.. but I'm hoping to finally see some improvement soon.. and I hope you feel better too! <:))

Any who, I'm glad to hear your views on Conkeldurr! :D Some people can be kind'a harsh :x As for the Tepigs, I can see them sticking around even after evolving into Pignites. They love their mama and would have no desire to leave her.. 🥺

As for what threatens them.. when they were apart, I kind'a image any meat eating Pokémon that thinks they could take them in a fight would be a threat. Or perhaps territorial Pokémon or protective parents that would see a big Pokémon coming near and just attack on instinct.

Now that the two of them are together, they have a lot less trouble with random Pokémon. They're a much bigger challenge to take on as a team. Plus I can see Zuora walking with them disguised as a second Emboar or Conkeldurr. Creating a group that looks like three macho parents that will fiercely protect their piglets.

As for the Minecraft movie, here's the thing about the Piglins. In the actual game they turn into Zombie Piglins the moment they leave the Nether. Why are they still normal Piglins despite running through a village??

And a Netflix show... uhg.. I'm just not interested. I feel like Minecraft looses all its charm when you convert it into a show or movie. And especially if you mess up Steve as badly as they did. Jack Black.. that's the worst casting I can think of.🤦

This is so cool! It feels like it could be canon to the Pokémon universe! :DD

Also thank you so much!! :)))

I have! :0 I watched 8-bitryan play some of it! :) ALSO THANK YOU!! :DDD

@cicutagreninja

WOW!! :00 THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DDD I plan to return to it someday!! :)))

@astaherussy (Referencing this post)

I think I put that on almost out of habit <XD when I picture old abandoned houses I imagine notes stuck to the door warning of debts and bills that need to be paid lest the owners get evicted. So I drew that because it felt fitting!

..Only just now did I realize that the old owners were supposed to be a mystery.. if there was any at all. So having that note on the door doesn't really make sense.. 😅

ALSO WAAHG THANK YOU!! :DDD

I've seen the FNAF movie and I've seen multiple Youtubers play all the FNAF games. Though I haven't played through any of them myself. :00

As for what I thought of them.. I have a place in my heart for all the games. From the lore jumbling ruin DLC, to the classic first game, I'm a total sucker and I love them all.💞💞

The movie wasn't as bad as I feared it would be. I adored the inclusion of MatPat and the intended inclusion of Markiplier. There were some aspects I didn't like and a lot of missed opportunities in my opinion. And of course the lore is all outa whack..

None the less, I think the movie is charming. And my love for FNAF has only strengthened upon the movies release :))

@i-only-created-this-to-read

Since Metagross isn't in Black/White (Its in Black/White 2) I wont be looking into that species for a bit.. and I wont be looking at Mega evolutions-

As for a Quantum slime equivalent, I have no intentions to make equivalents for all the slimes- I didn't add trubbish to be an equivalent to pinks. I just noted that Trubbish are a common slime that can eat anything, just like pinks are :0

The slimes and foods I add will be their own thing. Not intending to replicate or replace any of the canon slimes or fruits/veggies/meats from slime rancher. If that makes sense-

@petrichormeraki

I don't really have any proper name ideas for them 😅 I've just been calling them the shiny one, the normal one, the runt and the big one. XDD

Also thank you!! :DDD

Oooo that's really interesting actually! :000 That would have been a much more tame version of my Zuoras story <XDDD

@pigeonsplural

SLAKJDJ THANK YOUUU!! :)))0

*plotting noises......

(Referencing this post)

This ask will be very relevant soon.. 😈 Also thank you! :)))

@roughsketch2010

WAHGG THANK YIU SOMUCH!! :DDD

@kermit-ydafrog

Daww 🥹 Thank you! MY question is why are you so kind?? :DDD

I've heard of it and seen a lot of fanart, but i never got into it myself😅

Thank you for remembering my boundaries and respecting them! <:) And yeah that paints a pretty vivid picture in my head XDDD

@holly-opal

He would have been a better voice for Bowser then Jack Black in my opinion..

@fandomcenteral

WAAHHG THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DDD And its still a surprise to me that I'm considered a celebrity :00 I hope people aren't intimidated to send me asks because of that.. <:D

@muncho1234 (eye post in question)

Peso, Dashi, Tunip and Ranger Marsh have no eye bags because they have decent sleeping schedules and diets. :0 The rest of the characters either have poor sleeping schedules, deal with a lot of stress, or are very hard workers and burn up all their energy throughout the day.. :(

Oh boy 💀

@minnesotamedic186 (Eye studies post) (Kwazii and Calico Jack hug post) (Ranger Marsh jump scare post)

WAAHGG THANK YOU!!! :DD I ALWATS LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE NOTICE THE DETAILS I PUT IN!! :))))

@caronaro-flipaclip

<XD While I agree with this, I cant help but get red in the face when people like/reblog my old artwork.😅😅 And there's nothing wrong with that! It just shows how far I've come! :)

[stormblessed95]

Watching Are You Sure?! EP 6

A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally they happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show so far!!

Flying to Japan on Nov 25, 2023!

Jikook being the rich bitches that they are now, do you think they had the whole plane just for them and their staff? The way they BOTH got to enjoy the window seats and the whole row to themselves for most of the trip. Genuinely wish I could fly that way 😂 it has to make that experience a little less miserable lol

Jungkooks super informal tone, the soft way he spoke, the way he placed his hand over Jimin's nape.... Topped off with talking about how their first ever trip together was to Japan, Tokyo. And that's why he wanted to come back. Excuse me 😭 the romantic in you is escaping!

JK panning down with his camera and us getting to see Jimin gripping his sweater over his tummy. Such a consistent habit! Both of them! JK randomly panning to film Jimin, and Jimin holding onto JK. They are so sweet and cute. It's giving boyfriend. I can't lie lol

"We have arrived" they say, while in a moving car, and I'm pretty sure Jimin has to be in JKs lap to film the way they are. Or at least BASICALLY all the way in it. Lol and JKs smug ass little smirk and pouty lips. Bro, chill 😅😂

The zoom in on Jimins eyes randomly. Another habit consistently consistent!

JK saying yes of course he knew Jimin's album was coming out soon and yes of course he watched the SGMB video. He stays up to date on all Jimin content thank you very much

Not the kids making Jimin feel old by calling him Uncle 😂😂

Jikook hanging out drinking and eating snacks and just chit chatting so normal and regular that Jimin just completely forgets they are filming a show for a brief second there, walking away without his camera. There is something so endearing about that

Not them showing us JK falling on the ice from both Jimin and JKs camera perspectives 😂😂

JK being super whiny and bratty and Jimin going "why are you so angry these days?" With a laugh and JK going "it's for the show" basically to be more entertaining. Lol and Jimin just saying that he can handle all his anger. Handle all of JK. "I can handle you" is what it's giving. And it's giving so so much. Just wow

They way they reminisced about their first Tokyo trip while eating their midnight snack 🥰 Jimin remembered so many details. JK just remembered being worried about Jimin's feet hurting during their long walk to Shibuya.

JK sharing how special it was for him to get a short letter from RM when he did his showcase. That was so cute!!

Them arguing over the AC with one being hot and the other cold was so relatable for me. It was like watching me and my partner 😂

They went to sleep in separate beds and woke up in front of cameras in separate beds, but you can't convince me that JK didn't end up in Jimins bed for at least part of the night. Lol his sheets are still tucked in all nicely (Jimin's aren't and JK doesn't sleep that neat from what we have seen lol) and his water bottle is moved over to Jimin's side of the nightstand too. But what do I know 🤷‍♀️😂

Has there been an episode where Jikook haven't brushed their teeth together? Lol

JK being all romantic about remember this moment of watching the snow fall together in the morning. And Jimin popping the bubble by saying they'll have to shovel so much snow in the military 😂😂

JK going I want to cut my hair and Jimin immediately coming over to crack jokes with wordplay 😂

JK just turning to stare at Jimin wanting his compliments over the glasses he picked out to wear. Lol and Jimin immediately giving him said compliment. It was absolutely giving domestic couple vibes. Can't lie won't lie

Bathroom selcas!!

JK wearing a napkin under his glasses because his nose was sweating because of the spice 🤣

The vibes and tones they have when speaking about their service is so drastically different when compared to in the USA. They are about to enter into service together and they have no more doubts or fear of being separated and you can tell in how they talk about it now versus then.

The editors making fun of Jikook ordering in Japanese lmfao "using all the words they know"

The reappearance of "KooKoo-San" 😭😭🥰😍

I love the animated train station 🤣🤣

Jikook sharing air pods and music on the train and roleplaying saying it feels like they are in an anime. They said they were listening to a Japanese song and Jimin was getting really into when he started this role play. Lol what song was it?!!?

Jimin pulled a JK and went from filming scenery to randomly switching his camera view to film Jungkook close up too.

JK snuggling up on Jimin as they watch the scenery go by on the train is the cutest fucking thing. JK was living the dream. You can tell they were so content and happy.

Finally arriving in Sapporo and walking through the train station seeing an adorable little girl and Jimin getting all sappy about how he would be an emotional mess as a girl dad if he ever had a daughter. JK looked both nervous and excited about that idea 🤣🥰💜

Jimin saying JKs live vocals on Hate You were so good that he threw his phone. So relatable. The biggest fanboy!

Jikook singing Super Tuna!! So cute!!

Jimin saying he has to be the most normal on a team of weirdos and JK being like nah babe, you are a total weirdo freak just like the rest of us! (Personally, I think to make it as an idol, you can't be normal, you gotta have a little bit of freak going on to be able to handle all of that lol) But yes Jungkook! Speak that truth! "Who sets the standard for 'normal' anyway?" EXACTLY!!!

Not Jimin pulling up Christmas Day by Jikook circa 2014 to listen to on their snowy drive in Sapporo Japan?! The sentimentality and romance in the air that has to be happening?! Lol even with their younger voices 🤣 the cringe over hearing his 19 year old voice say merry Christmas 🤣😂😂

Impromptu self photoshoot in the snow!

The way they giggle together is one of my favorite things. Over anything and everything

Jikook roleplaying at the museum bar lol that was inherently flirty. So flirty. What the heck. That was first time meeting at a bar with cheesy pick up lines roleplay. That's like kinky foreplay for some people 😂😂 JK getting all flustered over it too and ending it with the "you're ridiculous" lol

JK this thing is cute, Jimin buy it then. Ah, rich people 😅😂

Their embarrassed faces when the staff told them as they were walking away that they didn't pay for their drinks 😂😂😂 Jimin running up to go pay but with JKs black card! Lol not even his own! But that's before they said Cash only, so JK comes to pay for it in cash lol I too, would've felt very embarrassed over forgetting to pay 😂

Jimin galloping through the snow. Lmao he is such a little weirdo 🤣😂 love him so much

Their cute little snowball fight with JK picking up just massive clumps of snow to throw lol

Not them calling ARMY out for just enjoying watching them just sit around and eat. They know we are down bad lol

What kind of carrots is Jimin eating that they are bitter??! 😂

Jikook constantly memeing together too lmao!

Them saying they would've been such trouble together as same age friends. They already don't have a normal hyung/dongsaeng relationship at all. Can you imagine if those lines that they already pretend don't exist actually never existed at all? Already attached at the hip. If vminkook were ALL same age friends, they would be even crazier together I bet! Lol

Jimin once again talking about the dumpling fight. The way he was actually ready to beat Tae up during that is still so crazy to me 😂😂 the way he Knows they (Vmin) were both being petty AF back then and they can laugh now.

Lmfao not them talking about JK kissing RM for his birthday and RM telling him he went too far and crossing the line. They wore him down to accepting their kisses eventually. Birthday kisses must've turned into tradition since then for Joonie 😂😂

They've come so so far. I'm so proud of all my members. I too can't wait to see the 7 back together again!

Shall we head to the hot springs?? Can't wait!

Wrap Up Thoughts:

Please ignore any and all typos in this post. My brain is so fried and I'm so sleepy. Lol

Anyone else notice they spent almost this entire episode in matching and/or coordinated outfits? Yeah, me too! How very adorable of them. It's so obvious and clear in this episode than it has been in any other. The thing I noticed most about their dynamics in this episode was the consistency in all their little sweet and cute habits together. Things they've done around each other for years and years. And they are still doing it!

JK spent the entire episode randomly filming Jimin. And he said "I love it" or "I'm so happy" over 30 times in just the one episode. Traveling with Jimin and just chilling together brings him so much joy. Everyone should rejoice in that. And Jimin spent the entire episode randomly bursting out into song, but specifically SNTY 🥰 the support!

And the way JK was filming Jimin, it's still that consistency man.

I said most of my "analysis" moments in all that stuff above, I don't really feel the need to repeat myself but if someone wants or needs clarification on my thoughts, please ask/let me know! This was a beautiful and very sweet episode. They were just purely enjoying each other's company! They were so happy together. Good food, good beer, good company, beautiful atmosphere. I'm so happy for them. And it reeks of domestic bliss so often in this episode too. Lol love that for them as well!

If anyone in Brazil wants to know what video from Twitter is under any of my purple links, please let me know which one and I'll try and download and post that specific video for you. Just send an ask. Sorry for the inconvenience!

[ahgasegotarmy116]

He Doesn't Deserve You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter One

Summary: Life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You got the guy, and the job but everything else you had ever wanted has been crumbling around you. Pairing: Noona reader x Jeon Jungkook (She's 28 and he's 22) Word Count: 2.1k~ Warnings: yändere, manipulation, domestic violence, self harm, cheating, explicit language, hints at smut, angst, idk what else lol a/n: Ahh thank you so much for all of the love so far on the intro and even all the notes on the masterlist hehe. I'm really loving the direction this story is going in so I hope you guys will too! And thanks again to @kkusadmirer for the request!

Opening my laptop I pull up the most recent edit I had done on the next chapter I was working on. 

I'm a writer, not an incredibly famous one but a writer nonetheless. I make enough to get by and I'm able to work from home so that's all I ever really wanted. Just a silly girl, writing her silly stories, living her silly life. 

But unfortunately things don't always turn out the way you want them to. 

I thought I had it all, perfect grades and a perfect boyfriend with a loving family and a bright bright future. Now looking back at it all and seeing all of the stuff in the background that I somehow missed just makes me feel foolish.

How could I not notice Taehyung wondering eye? Why did I not listen to what my friends used to say about him? Why did I leave all of my friends behind for him? 

Being so wrapped up and so in love with him I didn't even notice the fact that my family was falling apart. My mom cheated on my dad and I never knew until they told me they were getting a divorce.

While my brother was struggling in high school while being around all of their screaming and fighting and finally got committed to a mental institution when he had a psychotic break.

I never knew anything about that. It's not like I didn't care, but I just never really reached out or gave them enough time to reach out to me. 

I was always like 'Oh Tae just got home I have to go' or 'Tae is expecting me so I need to get going'. My world has revolved around him for so long that my family and friends feel like strangers. 

How could I have been so stupid and neglected them, all for one guy?

The one that I wanted to build a future with and promised to do the same with me. Now here I am, 24 with student loans up to my neck and a sorry excuse for a marriage with a husband that is never home. 

I don't know what I managed to do in my past life that ended up royally fucking me up in this one but I'm sorry. Why couldn't I have done better so I would be saved from having my spirit broken and my heart ripped to shreds. 

The only positive thing is that this has given me is the inspiration to come up with an even more fucked up series of books that has been my only source of income for the past few years. 

Years, wow. 

Thinking about how much time has passed and how things went to shit so quickly helped me continue down this downward spiral and I don't know how to make it stop. Although the sound of keys jingling outside the front door is my rude awakening, my brain knowing I need to be conscious of what may happen next.

 I quickly wipe off the tears that I didn't even realized had started to fall and clear my throat. Moments later I'm met with the sight of Taehyung walking in wearing the same shirt I had seen him in yesterday but sports a brand new hickey near the collar, just barely noticeable but he makes no effort to hide it. 

"Y/n" I hear him call out, breaking me out of my train of thought. "Yes?" I question, hating that I've been caught off guard even though I was staring right at him. "I asked if we have anything to eat" he says, making his way over to the refrigerator, now going to see if he can answer his own question before I'm even given another second to speak up. 

"Um yeah I think there's some left over pizza from last night" I say and get up to walk towards him. "So how was work yesterday?" I ask tentatively, still not sure what kind of mood he's in. "Exhausting but it is what it is I guess" he says while stuffing his face full of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza. 

I turn to walk away while nodding my head, not bothering to ask anything else since it seems from his vague answers that he's not in the mood to talk. 

"Hey" he says, gently grabbing my wrist with the hand that wasn't occupied with the pizza, leaving me frozen in place. I know better than to walk away from him. Even if he's not mad at the moment doesn't mean that he won't be in the next. 

"Where are you running off to?" he asks pulling me close by that same wrist. Still doing so carefully but pressing on the bruises that he had left there from the last fight we had. 

He sees my slight look of discomfort and how my vision is trained on the wrist he's still holding and rolls up my sleeve, taking a quick look and seeing the evidence of his past transgressions.

"It left a mark huh?" he says examining the spot further and then bringing it up to his face where he places a few featherlight kisses on it, making a flash of heat run through my system when he looks back up at me with those eyes.

Those bedroom eyes that never fail to put me in a trance. He lifts his hand up towards my face and I flinch not knowing what to expect and see him stopping for a second, surprised by my reaction.

"Don't be afraid baby, it's just me" he says and keeps going, hooking his finger on the collar of my turtleneck to pull it to the side, no doubt searching for other marks. 

"There's marks here too. I guess it's a good thing you stay home. Don't want to have to make up excuses for those now would you?" he says tapping under my chin twice, a slight lilt in his tone, enjoying my clear discomfort in showing them to someone, even if it's the person that's caused them.

"What did you do today baby?" he asks, letting go of me and going back to grab a few other things out of the fridge to complete his meal. "Oh you know, just some writing" I say, trailing off and giving him the same answer that I've given him time and time again. 

"You almost done with it?" he questions, only really asking so he knows when my next big payday will be. 

I shake my head "No, not yet. I think I'm only about halfway though" I say, giving simple answers to his simple questions. "Well you better get it out soon. I bet your readers are dying to know what happens next" he says giving me a quick wink before taking everything he has in his hands and carrying it over to the couch. 

"Do you think you could grab me a beer?" he asks, but I know it's more of a courtesy than anything phrasing it like I actually had an option. I respond with a quiet yeah and bring it over to him, placing it on the coffee table. 

"Thanks babe" he says and grabs a ahold of my hand and angles his head up, clearly asking for a kiss to which I oblige. Again something I don't really have an option in doing. "I missed you" he says and rubs his nose against mine cutely, or at least it used to be cute. Now it just makes me sad thinking of all of those times when we were happy.

"Are you gonna watch the game with me?" this time giving me something that I actually have a choice in. "I think I've got some more writing I'd like to do" I say and he nods his head not even bothering to look at me or give me a verbal sign of acknowledgment before turning on said game and slumping back into the couch to watch. 

I walk over to my desk that happens to unfortunately be in the living room so I'm forced to grab my headphones to drown out the sound so I can hopefully get another chapter or two in before I call it a night. 

~~~~~~

"Baby" I hear him call for me through my headphones after some time, that's something that I've had to fine tune. Making sure I can hear him when he talks to me no matter what so it's one less thing I have to worry about him getting upset about. 

I pull out my headphones and turn my attention towards him, half expecting him to ask me to get him a beer. "Yes?" I reply, waiting to see what he needs. "Come here" he says holding his hand out to me and spreading his legs, showing me where he wants me. 

I get up and walk towards him, straddling him once I get close enough and putting my arms around his neck. "Hi" he says in a deep voice sending a shockwave through my nervous system. "Hi" I respond quietly, intimidated at the thought of what he might do next. "How was the game?" I ask tentatively, hoping for my own sake that there was a favorable result. 

"We won" he says, mindlessly tracing his hands up and down my curves. "How's your book?" he asks leaning into my neck, placing kisses over the bruises he had noticed from before. "

It's going" I whisper, starting to feel breathless from his warm breath fanning the sensitive parts of my skin. "Ready for a break?" he asks, question laced with a mischievous tone. I hum in acknowledgment, tilting my head to the side so he can have his fun.

~~~~~~

"I'm gonna head out but I'll be back later" Taehyung says while getting dressed with me still laying there with only a sheet to cover my body. "You're leaving?" I question, knowing he just said that but hoping he'll give me some sort of explanation.

"The guys wanted to meet up for a couple of drinks to talk about the game. Get some rest okay? I'll be back in a few hours" he says planting a soft kiss on my lips and one on my forehead. 

I nod as he pulls the comforter over me as well, starting to already to drift off to sleep. "Stay safe" I mumble and flip over to the other side to try and get more comfortable.

He looks down at me for a second and chuckles at my fucked out and sleepy state before walking out of our bedroom and soon I'm left with the sound of him closing and locking the door behind him. 

Although this night was bittersweet I'm thankful that it ended up like this. He's not a selfish lover when it comes to sex so I'm always left sleepy and satisfied except for the times that he's more rough, rough is putting it lightly so I guess I should say when he's more violent. 

I hate thinking about those nights and I refuse to let those dark thoughts cloud this physical euphoric feeling I have but I can't help but worry about what he might actually be going out to do.

 Would having a drink with the guys really make him want to leave his naked and freshly fucked wife alone in his bed? I just don't get it. If he's already been with me tonight could there be a possibility that he would wake up in another woman's bed and leave me waking up alone again tomorrow?

There's no use worrying about it though. It's not like it hasn't happened before, but why do I always let it get to me? Yes he's my husband but our marriage isn't like other ones in anyway shape or form. I'm here when he wants or needs me and that's it. I'm not allowed to want or need him because I'm just left disappointed every single time.

He doesn't love me, he just loves what I can give him and I need to come to terms with that. But it's nights like these where he's gentle and whispers sweet nothings in my ear that make me second guess things. 

Maybe he's changed? Maybe he's realized what actually matters? And maybe I'm just getting my hopes up. I can't keep lying to myself but I don't know what else to do. I feel alone most days but these little glimmers of hope are what keep me holding on and unfortunately that's all I have left. 

prev / next Series Masterlist

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[hanniebaeee]

Crazy For You - Final Part

Hyunjin x fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT, drinking, cursing MDNI

Genre: enemies to lovers, fluff, angst

Summary: You and your best friend's cousin, Hyunjin don't get along very well. This game of cat and mouse may be a disguise to hide your real feelings.

a/n: Hyunjin is just the cutest bun!

Part 1 , Part 2

You hadn't spoken to Hyunjin or even glanced his way after the dinner party events. But seeing him at college with Rose, both engaged in a conversation, and laughing like the leads of a Kdrama had you bristling in rage.

Fine. If that's how it's gonna be, then fuck you, you thought as you made your way to the library. All you wanted was to be alone. You were so tired with this thing with Hyunjin, you just wanted a break. As you stormed on furiously,  you walked straight into someone.

'Wow!  You OK?'

You looked up to see Chris giving you a concerned look, holding your arm so that you wouldn't fall back. It was enough for the floodgates to open. Tears rolled down your cheeks and you throw your arms around Chris, who put his arms around you protectively.

'Hey, hey, its OK.' he said, as you cry against his chest.

He stroked your hair, trying to calm you down. Once you were better and your breathing was back to normal, he gave you a soft smile and said,  'Let's get you something to eat, OK?'

You nod and let him walk you to the cafeteria, holding hands.

'Wanna tell me what happened?' Chris asked, placing a steaming cup of your favorite coffee in front of you.

'I-' you began. 'I don't think whatever we tried to pull off...worked.'

'How do you know that?' Chris asked.

'He was cosying up with Rose just now.' You said, your voice shaking again. 'I'm sorry you had to see me like that, Chris. I couldn't hold back.'

'It's totally fine.' Chris said, shaking his head. 'I want you to come find me whenever you need help, yeah?'

You smile through your tears.

'Thank you so much for coming to the party, Chris.' You said. 'Jennie and Minho and Lisa all love having you over.'

'Thank you for inviting me, sweetheart.' Chris said giving you a smile. 'Now, what can I do to stop these tears, hm?'

'Let's go out for lunch. I need to get away from him. How about that new cafe near the bus stop?'

'Let's do it.' Chris said, nodding.

Hyunjin dropped his backpack at their regular table and frowned as he didn't see you there.

'Where is she?' he asked.

'Having lunch with Christopher.' Jennie said, in between feeding Changbin a mouthful of salad.

'What? Why?' Hyunjin asked, his heart racing.

Jennie shrugged.

'Um, she wanted to, that's why you pabo.' Lisa said, clearly enjoying his reaction.

'What the fuck is going on here, Lisa?' Hyunjin growled, eyes narrowed. 'Why is he always around?'

'The real question is why is it not YOU, Hyunjin.' Lisa said. 'You're always around, but you do nothing but hurt her over and over again.'

Hyunjin stood up, grabbing his backpack.

'Changbin. Outside. Now.' He snapped at Changbin,  who sprang up from his seat after giving Jennie a quick kiss.

Once outside, Hyunjin glared at best friend.

'I told you it wouldn't work!' he said. 'See what's happening!'

'Calm down, Jin!' Changbin said. 'Shit.'

'How do I calm down!? I know I fucked up OK?' Hyunjin said. 'I can't lose her to him!'

'You won't!  This is Y/N we're talking about!' Changbin said, trying to be strong but he was panicking. 'We'll make it right, I promise!'

Just as they finished talking, they saw you and Chris walking together, laughing at something. Hyunjin felt jealousy taking over him. But again, you looked so genuinely happy, it broke his heart that it wasn't him who was making you smile like that.

Hyunjin starts walking, pushing past Changbin. He didn't stop until he was inside one of the bathrooms. And to Changbin's horror, Hyunjin burst out into tears.

'Dude!' Changbin said, rushing forward to pull his friend into an embrace. 'Hyunjin, stop!'

Hyunjin just sobbed, letting out years worth of despair and pain that he'd been holding in. He was so heartbroken, Hyunjin didn't think there was anything left to do. He had lost you and he didn't have it in him anymore to fight through this. This was it.

'I'm not going!' You said, shaking your head. 'Look, he clearly likes Rose. Let them be!'

'Oh my effing God!' Jennie growled in frustration. 'Y/N L/N, apparently we are not the only idiots here. Ok? I spoke to Binnie and he told me that he is the one who made Hyunjin ask Rose to the party. Got it? That pabo wants you. Not anyone else. What's wrong with you?! Why won't you just see it, already?!'

'Jen, calm the fuck down. And, Y/N. It's just us. Since when do you care if he's around or not? You're coming and that's that.'  Lisa said, walking out of the room to avoid an argument.

You look at Jennie with sad eyes and she comes forward to hug you.

'I'm sorry, Y/N. I love you, ok? I want you to be happy. It is just so frustrating when you decide not to see what's really happening right in front of your eyes. I know you feel put down and insecure, but can't you try?'

You nod, allowing Jennie to pick your dress and do your makeup.

And that's how you ended up at the nightclub in a dress you hated. Your friends were adamant on making Hyunjin see what he was missing. Even though the only thing he did was sit by the bar, taking shots and drowning in his misery.

'He didn't bring her along.' Lisa noted, and Jennie nodded.

'Where's Y/N?' Jennie asked and Lisa pointed out to the couch where you sat with a drink in hand and a jacket covering your dress.

Jennie stomped over to you and said, 'Darling, we're trying to get things to work here. Please. Do your part!'

'I don't want to do anything!' You said stubbornly. 'I wanna go home.'

'Don't make me mad, Y/N.' Jennie said. 'Now get that darn jacket off and go get you man!'

'Do I have to?' You plead, making Jennie close her eyes tightly and purse her lips.

As much as you wanted Hyunjin, you just couldn't even think about a rejection. After all, it all went down after you refused to go further with him.

'Y/N. Listen to me clearly, yeah? I've known you for long enough to know what Hyunjin does to you. I've seen you falling for that man over and over again. You can tell me that he's an asshole. I will agree. But it never stopped you from loving him. And I know for a fact that my brother loves you as much as you love him. You're both the biggest idiots I've ever come across. You wasted so much time bickering and having ego clashes. You know that he doesn't even like Rose. He's crazy for you. But he stinks at showing it. He's afraid you'll reject him. He thinks you didn't want to fuck him because you think he's not good enough for you. He doesn't understand that it's because you want to be meaningful with him. He's just confused. Just give him a chance. If you can.' Jennie took big breaths and sat down, gulping her drink down in one go.

The music was too loud and yet only Jennie's words float around your brain, stabbing you at all the right places. He thinks he's not good enough for you? He really thinks that, when you actually think he's the most perfect man you've ever met? Arrogant, yes, but still, perfect.

'She's right you know.' Lisa added. 'He tries to show that he doesn't care. But he's just really insecure and thinks he doesn't deserve you.'

'Uhhhh!!!' You cry out before standing up and getting the jacket off. 'Fine. I will kill you both if he does something stupid.'

Fixing your hair and adjusting your dress, you walked over to Hyunjin.

'I hope this works.' prayed Jennie. 'I'm so done seeing to them cry over each other. Fucking idiots.'

You stood behind Hyunjin, your hands sweaty with nervousness.

'Oh God.' You say under your breath.

Hyunjin felt so numb as he looked at his glass of alcohol with no real interest. He didn't want to drink, he was just trying to get the image of you with Chris off his mind.

You clear your throat and he paid no attention. You take one step forward, now standing beside him. He looked sideways, and seeing you, he sighed.

'What do you want, Y/N?' He asked, dejected.

Your heart flutters at the way he says your name.

OK, stop being so dramatic!, you tell yourself and sit next to him.

'What's this, Hyunjin?' You ask.

He swirled the drink in his glass, chuckling sadly.

'I'm doing some self reflection shit Changbin wants me to do.' He said.

'He wants you to do that in a club?' You ask.

'Apparently.' He replied. 'And why are you here?  Where's your boyfriend?'

'I don't have one, Hyunjin.' You said with a sigh.

'Oh, the one you went on lunch date with?' Hyunjin asked, and you could see the sadness in his eyes through the lights flashing on his handsome face. And there was no teasing there. None at all. Just sadness.

'That was just a friendly lunch outing.' You said. 'So that I could avoid seeing someone I care about with someone who had made life really hard for me.'

Hyunjin's heart skipped a beat.

'What?' He asked, his heart breaking into a thousand pieces. 'What do you mean?'

'Don't pretend now, Hyunjin. Everyone knows.' You say sadly.

'I don't.' Hyunjin said. 'What do you mean?'

'Rose used to bully me back at school, ok? And it had a lot to do with you. Anyways, I think she regrets it now, but some things just don't go away with a sorry, does it?'

'Baby, I never knew. I would never have agreed to-' Hyunjin felt horrible. He wanted to cry. 'I'm so sorry.'

'Where is she anyway?' You asked, ignoring his apologies. 'I half expected to see her wound around your neck when I came in.'

Hyunjin gives you a look and you shrug.

'She's not my girlfriend, Y/N.' Hyunjin said. 'Please.'

'Ok.' You say, your heart beating louder than the music in the club.

'Honestly, why are you sitting here and talking to me?' Hyunjin asks, pushing his drink away.

'Because you are too much of a coward to come to me.' You said under your breath.

'Excuse me?' Hyunjin gives you a glare.

'Because, Hyunjin. If I keep waiting for you to come back, I'm afraid you won't.' You said loudly.

He just sat with his eyes wide open.

'So that you can reject me again? We were in a relationship and you pushed me away when I -' Hyunjin just laughed sadly and reached forward, grabbed his drink and gulping it down. 'Oh wait, you pushed me away twice.'

'When you wanted sex? Hyunjin, we had a made up relationship because your sister dictated us into it. I love Jennie for trying so hard to get us together. But that's not how it should work. I want you to ask me out. I want you to take me out on dates. I want us to be a normal couple.' You said, the weight on your heart getting heavier and heavier. 'I want to have sex with you, but I want it to mean something. You won't even talk to me. Tell me one meaningful conversation we've had. Just one. I can't live in the fear of you getting bored with me after I agree to a random fuck with you. No.'

Hyunjin was silent, but his hands trembled. You are silent too, waiting for him to speak. Your eyes fall on his trembling hands and you slip your fingers through his, holding them tight.

He exhaled noisily,  turing to face you completely.

'I'm sorry.' He said. 'I'm sorry for being a pain all my life. I'm sorry for saying that no one would want you...its not true, because you're amazing, Y/N. I've loved you since we were kids. Then we kiss at that party, you push me away and you ignore me and pretend like nothing ever happened - it broke my heart. You should understand that nothing I have with you is ever meaningless. I would never fuck you and leave you. I could never. Because I love you too much for all that.'

You squeeze his hand as he struggles to speak.

'My mother is, well, she's unbearable. I didn't want her to harass you any more than she already did. I teased you and stayed away all those years ago, only because I didn't have it in me to drag you into any shit with my mother. Then we moved, and I started seeing you all the time. I hoped I could finally get somewhere with you. But every time we spoke, it ended in a fight.' He said, shaking his head. 'I started to believe that you're too good for me. You deserve better. Someone like Chris. And it made me so angry.'

You had never seen this much honesty from Hyunjin. His thumb rubbed soft circles on your hand, and it relaxed you.

'I have loved you since I was what, seven?' He said with a chuckle and it made you laugh, a tear rolling down your face. 'I will wait. For however long it takes. 'Coz I want you.'

'I think I have waited for this long enough.' You say,  and lean forward, placing a soft peck on his lips.

Hyunjin gave you the brightest smile ever, scooting closer and placing a hand on your cheek, kissing you. His lips moved softly with yours, and you could taste the alcohol in his mouth.

Pulling back a bit, you speak against his lips, 'Are you drunk, Hyunjin?'

'I had one drink, Y/N.' He said. 'Good enough to remember this for tomorrow.'

Getting off his chair and dragging you along, he walked towards the exit.

Jennie, Lisa and Changbin stood watching you kiss Hyunjin.

'Yes!' Jennie said, pumping her fist in the air. 'Finally!!'

She kissed Changbin in happiness and Lisa grinned at the two.

'I hope our work here is done. I'd rather murder them both than try to get them together. Again.' Lisa said, shaking her head.

Jennie laughed happily.

You close your eyes, melting as Hyunjin's lips placed open mouthed kisses along your neck. Both of your lips were swollen from kissing and a few pink marks were starting to show up on your neck.

'I love you, baby.' He whispered, his sweet voice sending shivers down your spine.

'I love you too.' You managed to reply, only to have him capture your lips with his. His hands gripped at your hips, desperate for some friction. He held you close,  and moaned softly as you moved your hips, almost involuntarily.

'I want you.' Hyunjin said, struggling to control himself. 'I can't hold back anymore.'

'Then don't.' you tell him, cupping his cheeks with your hands.

'Are you sure?'

'Take me home, Jinnie. I want this.'

Letting you climb off his lap, Hyunjin drove you home. His hand remained on your thigh, squeezing gently, like he needed that touch to make sure this was real.

He had no patience. Scooping you up in his arms, he walked towards your bedroom. Kicking the door shut behind you, he dropped you on the bed carefully,  climbing in behind you.

More kisses, more urgent ones, followed. His hands roamed your body, not missing an inch of it, as you had yours around his neck,  holding him as close as possible. His fingers moved towards the zipper of your dress and he looked at you for permission.

Pressing your lips to his for a small kiss, you give him a smile and nod. His fingers graze your smooth skin as the zipper fell open. Pulling the dress off you, his lips buried themselves in your soft breasts.

Legs intertwined, fingers intertwined, his lips left shades of pink on their wake on the soft flesh of your breasts.

'Jinnie!', you cry.

'Yes, baby' he purred, his thigh pressing against your sensitive core.

'Please -' you whimper.

You were overwhelmed as you watched him strip. This being your first time, you were nervous. You entire body trembled in his arms.

His lips found your hardened nipple, and he sucked on it gently. You moan, your fingers gripping his hair tightly. Back to devouring your lips, his hand moved down, disappearing between your thighs.

You gasp as you feel his fingers graze over your sensitive bud. You hold on tightly as he explored your wet folds, fingers slipping inside you and then surfacing to massage your clit.

You were falling apart. Ragged breaths and soft moans filled the room.

'Baby, can I?' Hyunjin whispered against your ear. You nod slowly. Getting in between your legs, he positioned himself at your entrance. He was so handsome, you were lost in his beauty. And you gasped again as he rubbed the swollen head of his length against your wetness.

'Hyunjin, wait-' you stutter.

'Hmm?' He looked afraid all of a sudden.

'Please go slow...I -'

'Is this...?' He looked concerned, and a bit surprised.

You nod, blushing.

'Its ok, baby. We can stop anytime you want to, ok? Tell me if it hurts too much. And I'll be slow, I promise.' he says, kissing your cheek lovingly.

He kept his promise as he pushed in slowly. It felt so uncomfortable and the stretch was painful. But he kept whispering sweet things to you, asking you to relax. A few tears were shed, as the pain and sting felt way too much. But once in, he waited for you to adjust to him. When you finally nod, allowing him to move, he did ever so gently.

It stung, but the pleasure was beyond words. You were both so giddy with excitement and happiness. Finally.

You lay in his arms, spent and cuddling. Your head rested on his chest, his arms wrapped around your waist. You quickly clean up before falling asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.

You woke up to the sound of someone knocking on your bedroom door. You try to untangle yourself from Hyunjin, but he didn't let you go.

'Jinnie, it's really late.' You laugh, turning around to face him.

'I don't want to get up. Just wanna cuddle with you forever.' He mumbled.

'Well, you're lucky, 'coz you can do that forever. But let's go get breakfast now, yeah?' You said and he agreed reluctantly. But he pulled you closer and pressed his lips to you before letting you go.

Wearing a sweater that covered most of the hickeys, you step out. Jennie and Changbin gave you teasing grins.

Jennie glanced at the purple bruise on your collarbone that unfortunately wasn't covered by your dress and cleared her throat.

'So-' she began.

'Are we gonna ignore that little-?' Lisa points at the hickey, and you drop the slice of toast you were buttering.

'Lisa!!' Jennie hissed.

Changbin sniggered and raised his eyebrows at Hyunjin who had joined the table. He saw you trying to pull at your sweater and raised his eyebrows.

'Why would you hide it?!' Hyunjin asked, making you blush more.

'Oh my God!' You groan, turning away from him.

'Wow. This would take some getting used to.' Lisa said. 'I think I liked it better when you guys tried to kill each other all the time.'

Hyunjin hugged you from the back, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

Hyunjin wanted to walk you to class and followed you around like a lovesick child. ALL THE TIME. He stole a kiss or two whenever opportunity presented itself. You think you've never seen him smile so much.

He literally wanted to carry your books for you. The two books you just got from the library. But you thought he was the cutest little bean. Chris saw Hyunjin fussing over you and had the time of his life, laughing. He would never let you forget this. Ever.

Chris: I just saw the funniest thing.

Chris: Oh My God. LOL.

Y/N: Christopher.

Y/N: I saw you staring at us and then rolling on the floor laughing.

Y/N: I thought you'd be on my side.

Y/N: TRAITOR.

Chris: I'm sorry. I'm so used to you wanting to strangle him.

Y/N: We didn't even do anything.

Y/N: Stop it. You're doing it again.

Chris: What have you done to Hwang Hyunjin?

Chris: Playboy. Campus bad boy.

Y/N: He's not!

Chris: He's like a puppy rn

Chris: Wtf did you do?!

Y/N: I hate you

Y/N: CHRISTOPHER!

Chris: Ok sorry. I'm so happy for you. And puppy.

Chris: 🤣🤣🤣

Y/N: 🙄🙄🙄

[patoslover]

Sorry this is kinda long.... I would have liked to share this in the discord server, it's a more private way, but then the lockdown happened and I don't think I can wait any longer to show this.

Ok so.... Yesterday night, I got a bit emotional over my life and a little reflecting on what has happened the past month or so and how it affected me and all [10khaos, maggots discord sv, 15khaos, apocalypselockdown, among others] (as I always do, I'm such a soft-ass (I do hope that made up word doesn't mean anything flirty I'm trying to lowkey insult myself in here tyvm English)) And so as I always do when emotions hit, I wrote a poem-kinda-thing.

I showed it to @lxvenderjewel and @falling-raine and this happened

And later @the-beard-of-edward-teach saw it and well....

I made changes to it since I showed it to them, but it's for better, trust me.

(the poem is at the bottom of the post woo)

I think that's enough of a warning for y'all. But just in case, this made people cry, this poem, it's very very dear to me in levels I can't write I can't explain I can't put into poems all the feelings and stuff, but I hope this poem makes up for the most part.

Be careful. I love you.

Thank you @the-beard-of-edward-teach @arkytiorlecter @voids-ideas @orpiknight @cawdra @apollos-dodgeball-target @obsessed-sketches @zonzolik @dashoulinas-fandom-dump @eybefioro @queermarzipan @lxvenderjewel @ivory--raven @styx142 @myfranticscribbles @empressumbreon @frogs-go-ribbit @thearoacemess @goodomensduh @sounds-void-fishy @arkytiorlecter @random-doctor-on-the-internet @apophid-I-eat-everything @achilles-in-a-blanket-burrito @hello-ello-ello @harbinger-of-existential-dread @howmanyholesinswisscheese @an-ace-on-the-case @goblin-named-sam @1800ineedshelp @chaoticgenderflood @ivory--raven @aroaceblackhole @three-smiles-and-a-unicorn @coppicegate @zonzolik @falling-raine @dashoulinas-fandom-dump @koboldkatalyst @arkytiorlecter @friday-im-in-love-with-crowley @good-usernames-were-taken @weirdly-specific-but-ok THANK YOU THANK YOU ILY (oh wow that's a lot of ppl) (PLS PLS tell me if I forgot anyone there's so many of you, SORRY IF I TAGGED YOU TWICE AAA AND I'M SORRY IF YOU WERE TAGGED AND DUNNO WTF I AM I GOT LOST WITH THE TAGS AAAA AND SORRY IF I TAGGED U AND THE TAG DIDN'T WORK)

I love you all so so so so so so so much, you're so dear to me. Thank you. This is a gift for you.

Demons Out.

There's a hell outside,

Demonic screaming,

Trees, fall's leaving.

And I'm just here inside,

In my bubble.

Trapped inside me,

Trapped in myself.

There's demons out,

Asking to come.

But I won't let them,

I'm not alone.

Inside myself,

Inside my world,

I've got most people

Than all of your's.

They're worth more

Than any gold,

And they're far way,

More beautiful

Than any Sun,

Than any Star,

They are right here,

They are right now.

They're my comfort,

And some my loss,

But they're all lovely

Precious along.

They're the most

Amazing

Beings to exist,

And so I'm afraid

That they'll all be missed.

Because I fear

One day they'll go,

That's why I start

To sing a song.

Please let us all

Become real friends,

Please let us all

Reunite again.

There's demons out,

Angels inside.

There's me in-between

Caring for (them) all

Please let us all

Reunite again.

There's demons out.

And I'm in pain,

But not too much,

We'll find a way.

There's demons out,

We are in pain.

But I will start

To sing again.

I care for each

And every of you,

So then I start

To sing a song.

Please let us all

Reunite again.

There's demons out.

We'll try again.

[leeeeeeeeech]

Been thinking about eldritch Beej a lot, and I'm in the process of polishing up my ao3 fic, but I just had to get a scene out of my head so enjoy :3

Fem! reader

Well, this was not how you anticipated your night going. The date started off well enough. The guy was cute, handsome even. He said all the right things, he was interesting, he was the perfect guy to take home to the folks….

But he wasn't Beetlejuice.

That was the issue. The kerfuffle if you will. The whole date, I couldn't stop thinking of that damn pervert. Imagining how he would react to what I said. Probably some fumbled sex joke instead of the polite cough I received in its stead. Polite, and superficial. Like a business meeting. Transactional intimacy at its finest. I got a goodnight kiss at least. But, all I could think about was what was missing. The lack of scratchy stubble, the smell of dirt, the grabby hands...

"No dice?" Beetlejuice had asked me. He had told me that guy seemed like a loser, not worth my time, yadda yadda. I remember rolling my eyes and muttering something about keeping his dirty shoes off my couch before storming off to my room. I could still feel the fiery white hot sensation in my chest as his echoing laugh followed me down the hall.

At first, I mistook it for annoyance. Beetlejuice always had something to say about my dating life. Nobody was good enough. I knew he just didn't like the idea of me giving my attention to someone else. He had to get over himself at some point!

Now, I'm in my bed, fucking myself with my fingers. Apparently the line between anger and horniness has dwindled significantly.

Go figure.

"Hmnn." I bit my lip, trying to keep myself quiet. It's been a while since I've masturbated, my pussy tingling deliciously as I furiously rubbed at it, growing impatient. All I wanted was to cum and go to sleep. I just wanted to forget my stupid feelings for the night. I could sort them out tomorrow.

A low growl reverberated throughout the room, making me freeze in place. A green glow filled the space, illuminating my room in a otherworldly light. The air seemed taught, like a string about to snap. My eyes darted around just as a low whine stretched itself from the doorway to me. Beetlejuice stood there, with an expression I didn't quite recognize.

I snapped out of whatever spell I was under, and covered myself with my blanket. He laughed, taking a step closer towards the bed.

"Little late for that toots."

He breathed in deep, his nostrils flaring. He closed his eyes, and that low rumble filled the room once again. Like thunder.

"Get out. I don't want you here." Another step towards the bed. His eyes shone in the dark, there glow held a primal power that made my insides throb with fear, or maybe desire. Hell, it was probably a little of both.

"We both know that one's a lie, Y/n~" He smirked, tugging on the blanket. I tightened my grip on it.

"N-No. I want you out." Wow, even I didn't believe myself. He chuckled, tearing the blanket away with ease. I snapped my legs together as the cold air hit my exposed sex.

"Don't be shy now, babes. I know you were thinking about me." He drawls. My face heats up at the declaration. He doesn't say anything regarding it, but I don't miss his shit eating grin.

" I can smell how wet ya are around me ya know," His eyes rake over me, and I feel like I'm burning underneath his gaze.

"I know you like it when I feel ya up." A set of hands appeared by my chest, giving my breasts a playful squeeze. I gasp, but there gone before I can do much else.

"It's been torture to hear ya practically scream for me in yer sleep." I can't get much more red at this point. This is humiliating, being emotionally eviscerated like this. I feel that familiar throb once again, like my ovaries are pounding at the door to the outside, begging for him.

"Whatever yer fantasizing, I can do sooo much better~" He winked, giving a small chuckle.

"Wha- why...?" My words caught in my throat as I felt something slimy wrap itself around my ankle. I look down and gasp as a tentacle waves at me before stretching itself towards my thigh, pulling my leg outward. My breath hitches, and I try to fight it.

"Never been one fer slowburns. Gets boring. I like a lotta action." Beetlejuice chuckled. Another tentacle appeared from behind him, diving straight for my other thigh, practically wrenching my leg open. I panted from the overexertion, and watched helplessly as Beetlejuice leaned forward, his arms boxing me in as he looked me up and down once again before meeting my eyes.

"You want me to stop, you know the words." All I do is nod, giving in to him. He smiled that signature toothy grin, before sliding down my torso. He gives a small bite to the inside of my thigh, making my breath shudder. He chuckled again.

"Don't worry, Y/n, I'll take very good care of you~" His tongue snaked its way out of his mouth, and made it's way towards my dripping sex.

[billthedrake]

HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS (PART THREE)

"Wow, you went all out, Coach," I said as I helped him set out the food on the table.

He gave a grin and replied, "Just my bachelor holiday dinner... thanks for sharing it with me, Russ."

"My pleasure," I said.

Ed had in his hand a bigger sized bottle of beer, which he opened. "Feel like sharing my Christmas present?"

I nodded. "Just a half glass," I said. "Gotta drive back." I wasn't a big beer guy, but I didn't want to turn down Coach S's offer. "Who's the gift from?" I asked.

"Matt Reynolds," he replied as he poured my glass half full then set to give himself some. "He and I are both into beer." Coach Reynolds was the high school's head football coach.

I held up my glass. "It makes sense, but I guess I never thought of teachers hanging out together outside of school."

He held up his glass and gave a silent toast. Then he replied with a smirk, "I'll admit get along better with some of the teachers more than others. Matt's my closest friend." Ed got a little shy as he added, "He's the only one who I've come out to, actually."

"Coach Reynolds?" I responded, incredulously.

That made Ed laugh. "Um, yeah. You surprised?"

I nodded. "The guy's a total meathead. Yeah, I'm surprised."

My former teacher shrugged. God, he was so handsome and adorable. I was glad we'd gotten the sex out of the way, so I could actually carry on a conversation with the man. "People have a way of surprising you, Russ."

"Sometimes not for the better," I said. Then realizing I might have come across as snotty or cynical, I added. "Sorry... I guess I'm still a little bitter from the way Zach Martin treated me." Zach and I had been friends since 6th grade, but he stopped talking to me when I came out.

I saw a look of real empathy on Coach S's face. "Sorry, Russ," he said. "I didn't know the full story, but I know you went through a lot."

"You do learn who your real friends are," I said, my tone less bitter than my words now. "I realize now that Zach is just crazy insecure, and I just got caught up in that."

Ed nodded. "I wouldn't be surprised if Zach is gay himself."

I don't know why that didn't occur to me. "You think?"

He nodded. "Don't take it to the bank. It's just a hunch. But I know when I was that age, I was so freaked out someone would figure out... I may have been an asshole to a few guys just so I could fit in."

"Damn, Coach," I said.

He seemed embarrassed now. "I never had a friend come out to me, and I don't know what I would have done if I had. I'd like to think I'd do the right thing, but you never know." He took a sip. "I just know I was MAJORLY fucked up about the gay thing. Playing sports didn't help." I knew Ed Stanley was opening himself up to me, maybe in a way that wasn't easy for him. "I always admired how you handled things, Russ."

That surprised me. "In what way?"

He looked at his beer glass as he reflected on my question. "I don't know. You seemed confident in yourself." He looked back up at me. "Whatever... I know being a teenager isn't easy and probably wasn't for you either. Teachers don't know all that's going on, but we have more of an idea than our students realize."

I laugh. "Probably, yeah." Then, "truth be told, being an adult isn't always easy either."

That made Ed smile. I loved his smile. "You got that right," he said. "There's one big consolation prize, though," he said. "What we did just now," Ed added with an impish grin.

"You mean the fucking?" I clarified.

His blue eyes twinkled. "Yeah, the fucking. Maybe I shouldn't admit this, but that was the hottest sex of my life."

Damn, this man knew how to push my buttons. "I'm honored," I said. "So maybe I shouldn't admit it was the hottest sex of my life, too."

"Well, here's to hot sex," Ed toasted.

I laughed and matched his toast.

We talked a little less as we dug into the food. I don't think I realized how much the sex had worked up my appetite, and Ed seemed to be in the same boat.

But as our eating pace slowed, I had to ask the question on my mind. "So, Ed..." I started. "Why did you let this happen... You know, between us?"

He seemed to anticipate my question. "I got tired of putting my life on hold. I broke things off with Jessica two years ago," he explained about his former fiancee. "It was around the holidays, actually, and I guess I realize I'm still not happy." He gave me a little wince of a smile. "Seriously, having you keep me company has made my year."

My heart pounded. "Damn, Coach. I'm having a blast. Not only the sex, but all of it."

"You know, for a college kid, you're pretty damn mature."

"Hardly," I laughed. "I know this sounds cheesy, Coach, but for me, being gay... well, I just love other guys. Love spending time with them, in whatever way clicks." I found myself the one being embarrassed. "I guess I craved the male bonding I didn't always have."

"Remind me to punch Zach Martin's lights out next time I see him," Coach said. And it took me a second to realize he was joking.

I laughed. "Please do. The fucker."

Ed pushed his chair back. "Let me clear the dishes. I have some dessert if you have room."

"I have room," I said. "But I'm helping you."

I got up and started picking up out dinner plates. As I brought them into the kitchen, I could see out the window, into Ed Stanley's back yard.

"Holy shit!" I exclaimed.

"What?" Ed asked, concerned.

"It's a blizzard out there," I said. I set down the dishes by the sink and walked over to the sliding glass door.

I was exaggerating, but it was really coming down now, and several inches of white stuff lay on the ground, the reflected light making the dusk seem less dim.

I felt his presence behind me, his hand touching my waist. It was a simple gesture, and a welcome. "Jesus," he said. "Is it supposed to let up?"

I laughed. "Man, I don't know." I turned to him. "I should check in with my folks."

He patted my side before stepping back. "Yeah," he said. Maybe a little disappointment in his face that I'd be leaving, but possibly I was flattering myself.

I pulled out my phone and indeed I had a couple of worried texts from my mom. She was staying over at her friend's and was concerned I'd be driving in the winter mess. I told her I could stay over at my friend's and that I'd check in with Dad.

My father isn't a big texter, so I called him.

"Hey," he said when he answered. "Some storm, huh?" Dad could get right to the point sometimes. I think I inherited that from him.

"Yeah, Mom's freaking out about me. I told her I could stay over at Jason's tonight."

"Sounds good, Russ," Dad said. Then with a quiet tone, asked. "You're not at Jason's are you?"

I paused, a little freaked out I was caught in a lie. Though knowing Dad, he hadn't actually caught me at anything. The man just had a good sixth sense. I figured I was 21 and had no reason to lie to my parents. "No, Dad, I'm not. Sorry."

"I'll cover for you with your mom. Just be safe, OK?"

"I will," I said. "Promise. And again, Sorry." I was feeling like a heel now.

"I was 21 once," Dad said. "You need your space. If you need anything, a ride or something, just me a call."

"Will do."

I shook my head after I hung up. Coach S was right. Sometimes people can surprise you, in a good way.

He was just finishing cleaning up when I walked back in. "Everything OK?" he asked.

"Yep," I said. "If I'm not imposing too much, Coach, could I crash here tonight? I can sleep on the couch or whatever." I didn't want to make it seem like I was just trying to be clingy with him. "My parents just don't want me driving."

He laughed. "I damn well hope you're not taking the couch, buddy," he said. Then with a worried hesitation, he added, "I mean if you do, I'll respect that... but I wouldn't mind a little bonus time with you."

"I wouldn't mind either, Coach."

That made him smile. He set down his towel and faced me fully. "You know, I never was your coach."

"You prefer Mr. Stanley?" I teased.

"No, not really," he laughed. He stepped up and wrapped up his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. "You know, I didn't ever think I'd enjoy being with a taller guy," he said.

"Yeah?" I asked. I'd spent my teen years self conscious about my height but now enjoyed it. Ed Stanley was bigger and hunkier than me, but I was able to look down some at him as we stood toe to toe.

He nodded. "Guess I liked being the man."

"Ed, that's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard," I said with a laugh.

"Yeah, it is. Guess I got some hang ups. But I like this," he said. "You're a tall drink of water, Russ." He now ran his hands up my back, over the fabric of my T-shirt. "When did you bulk up?"

"Started hitting the weights freshman year," I explained. "Guess I had hangups of my own, you know, about my body...."

"You got a porn body, stud," Stanley said with a sexy grin.

"Look who's talking," I said.

We kissed. It was gentle and magical. Just a hint of tongue and I could sense our breath was synching up.

"Hmmm, I like snow days," the man said in a low voice.

"I'm liking them now," I replied.

I felt his hands come around my friend, openly feeling up my chest. I was so into his ex-jock build that I was enjoying seeing him clearly turned on by me. His hands traveling lower until his left knuckle grazed the crotch of my jeans.

"You're hard," he said, as he looked up into my eyes.

"Pretty much. Yeah," I nodded.

We kissed again, and now I took the occasion to feel up Ed's body. I undid a couple of his shirt buttons and felt him moan into my mouth.

The man seemed to be keeping his self-control as he stepped back. I could tell he had a boner in his sweats now, and I was proud I'd given that to him. "OK if we just enjoy a little time in the living room before hitting the bedroom? We got all night, Russ."

"Sounds good."

"I'll light a fire in the fireplace," he said. "Sometimes it doesn't seem worth the bother just for myself."

"I wish I'd brought something more comfortable to wear," I said. Even in his button-down, Ed looked relaxed with his sweats on.

"Feel free to dig through my drawers to see if something will fit you." His eyes swept up my body. "Not sure if there will be."

"Thanks," I said. I went back to his bedroom and looked through his casual clothes, all folded neatly in his drawers. Indeed his sweatpants and pajama bottoms were way too short, but I decided on a pair of gym shorts with a drawstring that helped them hold to a waist that was two inches smaller than his size. I could have stuck with my T-shirt, but I saw an old shirt with a baseball team logo. Something about wearing Ed Stanley's clothes excited me, so I grabbed the shirt, too. I slipped the shorts on without anything on underneath, then tried on the shirt. It was loose, but it came down below my waist, which was good.

He was done fiddling with the fire when I walked in.

"You found my old team shirt," he observed, walking over to join me on the couch.

"The Captains?" I asked, referencing the logo.

"Yep, my minor league team. Played with them for two years before I called it quits." He seemed nostalgic.

"Is that when you decided to go into teaching?" I asked. I didn't really know how any of this worked.

"No, I got my Ed degree in college. I knew the majors was a long shot."

"Well, you're a great teacher," I said, then blushed as soon as I did. "I guess this is weird to talk about, huh?"

"A little," he admitted. "But you're really hot, Russ... you've become a really hot young man. So if I have to deal with the weirdness, it's worth it."

He placed his arm around my shoulder again, and I leaned into his warm build some. I knew if he started something sexual, I'd be ready for it, but our session earlier that afternoon had taken away the urgency.

"I know this isn't my place to say, Ed, but you deserve to be happy." I couldn't look at him as I said this, but after seeing a certain loneliness in the guy, I felt I had to speak to it.

"Thanks, Russ," he replied softly. Almost sadly. "Are you happy?"

"More or less," I said.

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"I dunno," I said. I realized no one but Ed Stanley had ever asked me that question. "I mean, I'm enjoying college, and I guess I've dated a couple of guys. But like, I don't know, part of me wants a real relationship, something serious, to see what that's like. I mean, I'm not gonna rush it or anything, you know?"

His hand squeezed my shoulder. "Yeah, I know, Russ," he said.

I turned to him and his eyes were on me. Coach Stanley wanted another kiss. I wanted to kiss him. This time, I did my best to copy the man's soft approach. Something about our connection made me rock hard now as I kiss him and he kissed me back.

We made out some, a lot even. But we weren't rushing anything. It was around 7 and it was Christmas and the snow was coming down. We could enjoy this.

"What about you, Ed?" I finally asked as we parted, goofy expression on our face. "Any boyfriends?"

He shook his head. "I've tried the app thing. And this may sound old fashioned, Russ, but... I don't know, I think I need some other connection than coming in and taking off my clothes."

I nodded. "In all fairness Ed, you look REALLY fucking good without your clothes on."

He smirked. "Thanks. But you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do," I said. "I've done the hookup thing some, and I've enjoyed it. But... I don't know, earlier..."

I stopped mid sentence. Stanley picked up on it. "What?" he asked.

I gulped. "I'm afraid of saying something real stupid, Ed."

He put his hand beneath my chin and turned me toward him. "I want you to trust me, Russ. I may not agree with what you say but I'm not going to judge you. Promise."

I nodded. My body shook a little, which made me embarrassed because I knew Stanley could tell. "When you were in me earlier...."

"Yeah...?" he prompted.

"It felt incredible. It was incredible."

"It was incredible for me, too," he said.

"Yeah, but... I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think for me half of it was I wanted to make you happy. Like, I wanted to give that experience to you."

"Oh buddy," he muttered, his eyes a little moist.

"Maybe you think that's fucked up, but I think that's what made the fuck so good for me."

He took a deep breath, like he was trying to choose his words carefully. "That's what sex is, giving as well as receiving pleasure."

"It's not always," I corrected. I thought back to some of my hookups. "At least not emotionally."

"Yeah, not always," he agreed.

We kissed again. A little more eagerly this time. Part of me wanted to talk more with Ed, but this felt better. Being held by him, him pull me down on top of him as we reclined on the couch. He was warm, and the fireplace was heating up the room, too. Maybe this wasn't too different from time with my boyfriends of the past, but Ed Stanley brought a seriousness that wore down my defenses.

Slowly we humped on the couch and explored each other's bodies as we made out. He had me take off his minor league T-shirt and I unbuttoned his dress shirt once more. Ed Stanley was hard once more, I could feel his boner against mine, even if we hadn't stripped from the waist down.

But as we kissed Ed ran his hands down my back and under the waist of my shorts, which were his shorts really. His broad palms felt nice and warm against my bare buns.

He grunted into my mouth as I pulled up.

"Think I could press my luck, Russ?" he asked, horny as he could be.

"I'd say I'm the lucky one, Coach... are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

He looked into my eyes, his blue eyes clearly hungry. "I'd love to fuck you again, buddy." He put a slight emphasis on the "fuck" making it sound more naughty. "Maybe try some different positions."

I grinned. "You liked the barebacking, didn't you?"

He bit his lips and nodded. "And how. But if you're not up for it..."

"Oh, I'm up for it," I assured him. "I should be a little more relaxed from earlier."

"Is that how it works?" Ed asked, his fingers now dipping deeper into my crack.

"Can't speak for other guys, but a good fuck stretches me open a little. It's a nice feeling actually."

His nostrils flared as he took that in. "Bedroom?" he asked hoarsely.

"Lead the way, Coach," I said, then slid up off his body before standing in his living room, an erection evident in the shorts, matching his own clear boner.

Things felt smoother and slower now that we were working up for our second round. Yet our eyes ate each other up as we stripped down completely and got in on opposite sides of Ed's bed.

"Damn," he hissed as I moved in to nestle up against his naked furry build. "I'm glad you're staying over, Russ."

I could feel his hard dick against mine. "Funny... all of this happened because I ran into you."

"Glad I got that Christmas tree," he said. "I almost didn't."

"Glad I had the guts to hit on you," I replied.

He smirked. "I knew you wanted to."

"Yeah, I know," I said.

We kissed again. I was starting to worry about whisker burn or chapped lips, but it was like neither of us could get enough. The more we did, the more Ed seemed to get worked up. I was, too, sure, but I think my normal MO was to be a horndog when I was with a guy, so it was like I was waiting for the signal from him to amp things up.

I now used the element of surprise to push him on his back while I got up on top. His hands were greedily gripping my ass muscle as we got into it.

"Damn, you have a great ass," Ed said in a soft low voice.

"I realized at some point tall guys have to hit leg day twice as hard," I said, joking but not entirely.

He laughed. "I hope you don't mind me focusing only on your body... you know I think more of you, Russ."

I didn't know what Coach thought of me, actually, beyond this strange chemistry that had erupted between this week. I leaned up, flexing my bod a little and showing off for the man, even as my own hands were on his strong pecs. "I'll let you in on a secret, Coach. It's kind of a kick when you treat me like a piece of meat. I didn't think that would ever happen."

"Noted, buddy," he said, his own hands coming up to touch my smoother build.

I reached over to where the lube was still out.

"You, um... ?" Coach started to ask.

I nodded, reaching back to slick up his boner. Ed Stanley was rock hard now and I enjoyed the broad grin on his face as I slicked him up then leaned back against his cock.

"Twice in one day... fuck," he muttered.

I misunderstood what he meant. "You want it, right?"

"God, yeah," he muttered. His eyes were on my body some but mostly watched my face as I sank back onto him. The penetration indeed was easier this time. I was horny and Ed's prior fuck had loosened me just enough.

"Amazing," my ex teacher grunted.

I sat further down in his lap. I felt full in a good way, but it was the psychological part of this mating that got me going. "I didn't ask... what's your favorite position?"

"I gotta choose?" he chuckled.

"No," I replied. "Just curious."

His hands now openly caressed my front, his eyes clearly excited. "I love it all. But maybe doggy."

I nodded. "Hot. But let me ride you like this, and you can pick the positions you wanna try."

"Sounds amazing, buddy," Ed grunted. I could tell he was still in thrall with the feeling of condom-less sex. "Only it should be good for you, too."

"It will be," I assured him. "Maybe let me cum missionary," I added. "Last time was crazy hot."

"Will do."

Ed watched me work up and down in his lap, his hands now gently gripping my waist to guide me. Then not so gently he held me steady while he pumped up into me. "Feel good, buddy?" he asked.

It wasn't a question, though. Stanley could read the pleasure in my face. "Fuck me, Ed."

He got an almost serious scowl on his face as he got into fuck mode, thrusting up deeper into me. "All right..." he finally urged. "Climb off."

I didn't know what he had in store, but as I knelt on the mattress, Coach S's thick body scrambled out from beneath me and moved to come from behind. I felt his hand on the middle of my back, pushing me forward. "All fours, buddy," he urged, a new horniness in his voice.

I felt his lube-slick prick nudge back into place and once again his hands gripped my waist to almost pull me back on to him.

The thrusts were urgent and hard now. Not rough, but I was being nailed by a very horny and very athletic man. "Tell me if it gets too rough," he instructed.

"Feels amazing," I replied. It did, too. I wouldn't say Ed Stanley was making me any less vers in my sexual inclination, but he was revealing to me that when I did bottom, I wanted a top like this. That girthy cock of his was riding hard and heavy over my prostate. I braced myself on the bed and felt my prick drip onto his bedsheets while my former teacher used my hole.

"Goddamn... my last load is frothing up on my cock," he said excitedly. Like he was living out some nasty porn video. Which in a way I guess we both were. "Fuuuuck!" His thursts jackhammered into me in rapid succession, until I felt them pause.

The hands on my waist now let go and ran up and down my sweaty back. "Don't wanna cum just yet," he said softly. Then he pulled out and gave my ass a light smack. "Why don't you lie on your stomach and pull one leg up."

I did as asked, turning back to look at his hungry eyes and sweaty body as I did. "You've been thinking a lot about this, haven't you."

His wet dick pulsed. "I have," he grunted. "I watch a hell of a lot of porn, and now I have my own Corbin Fisher guy in bed with me."

I pulled my left leg up toward my chest, feeling my ass crack and hole exposed to his gaze. "Just remember I'm not actually a professional at this, Coach."

He had an apologetic look on his face. "Got it," he said, then scooshed forward to line up his prick to my now-wet ring.

I was half turned on my side, half face down, in a scissor position. The entry was easier this time, aided by the limits the angle put on Coach's thrusts. He was taking it slow, too. Only I got to feel the extra depth of penetration as his cock bore deeper. All the while, those blue eyes were on me. Watching.

"I love seeing your hardon while I fuck you," he muttered.

"I told you, Coach... it's good for me, too."

It was like my words made him focus on me, and the pleasure I was getting from my insides. Slowly, he sawed in and out, eyes locked on me the whole time.

"I feel like I could come any minute," he said after a few minutes.

"Why don't you?" I asked. I was so turned on but also knew my relatively inexperienced ass would probably tire out within a couple more minutes of this.

"Don't want it to end," he said simply.

"You know I'm gonna let you fuck me again, Coach," I replied. "That is, if you want."

"Yeah?" he said a real sense of hope in his voice.

I nodded.

"Fuck... I'm so close, buddy," he said, now very slowly working in and out of me. "Ok if we try this on your stomach?"

I didn't reply. I just moved my legs down and stretched out on the bed. Coach Stanley stretched out on top of me, covering my back closely with his hairy bulk and his beard tickling the back of my neck. Already he was thrusting into me, not fast but hard, while his hands felt up my arms.

"This OK, Russ?" he asked.

"Feels great, Ed," I grunted. It did, too. I'd tried this with a couple of guys before, including my frat boy boyfriend, but Ed Stanley was bigger and furrier and meatier in his build. I loved the full contact and the weight of him on me. And I loved the thickness of his dick plowing me steadily. "You can go harder if you want."

I swear he growled, let out a real bear growl, when I said that. His hands now held my arms down and he just went for it. Hard deep shoves into my ass as he eagerly went for his nut.

"Oh my fuck..." he grunted. Then I heard a deep series of whimpers as the man came, deep in my ass for a second time, his body twitching and jerking on top of me. I didn't think I could come in this position, but I felt a pressure in my prostate that made me feel the urgent need. I reached down and touched my prick. I had enough lube left in my right palm to make it work. Just two strokes back and forth and I was entering my own deep orgasm.

"Oh shit," I hissed as I regained some consciousness. I'd never had a bottoming orgasm quite like that. My first with Coach Stanley had been about fantasy buttons and the way he pressed every one. This second nut was more purely physical, the way Coach's topping practically fucked the cum out of me.

Ed was already rolling off me and lying down to get face to face as I turned on my side. "I guess that was good for you, too, huh, Russ?" he asked.

"Jesus, Ed. I can barely think right now," I muttered, still catching my breath. "But yeah...."

His own chest was rising and falling and I could even sense his heart beat as he smiled at me. "I think you telling me I could do it again sometime... that was the trigger for me."

I looked down on the bedsheets, where my cum had soaked the fabric. "I'm afraid I left a big wet spot."

He smiled. "Well you gotta sleep in it... just kidding. We'll change the sheets," he said. "But I'm glad you liked that, because... goddamn...."

"Yeah," I agreed. I slid off the bed. "Can I get some water?" I asked.

"Help yourself in the kitchen," he replied.

I slid Ed's shorts back on and made my way to rehydrate. When I returned, he'd stripped the sheets and was putting on a new set. I helped him. He was bare chested in his sweat pants. If I hadn't just had two rounds of intensely incredible sex, I would have boned up just looking at him. As I watched him tuck one side in, he looked up, catching me staring. He winked, which made me blush.

He picked up the bundle of soiled sheets and turned back to. "Don't worry, Russ, I'm in the same boat," he said. "Like I said, it's like when I wanted to play with my new toy all Christmas day."

I laughed. "You mean I can't play with mine tomorrow morning?" I joked.

He smirked. "I didn't say that, buddy," he said. "I'll throw these in the wash. You feel like having another beer in front of the fire place? I have some scotch too, if that sounds better."

I'd never had scotch but I figured what the hell. This evening was about new experiences and getting to know Ed Stanley. "Scotch sounds good."

He nodded. "Put another log on the fire, if there's still embers. I'll tend to it in a minute."

"Yep," I said.

Coach S wasn't making a move to put a shirt on, so I didn't either. Maybe we'd need to fire to keep warm, but I enjoyed the half nakedness together.

Coach offered me a small glass filled with the brown liquor and went to get the fireplace roaring again. He settled back on the couch next to me. It was my turn to place my arm over his bare shoulder, feeling the hardness and the heat of his body.

He had a quiet content look on his face. "You know, Russ, I don't want this day to end."

My heart pounded. "It doesn't have to, Ed," I said. "Well, it does, but you know what I mean."

He nodded. "You're a special young man, Russ. You know that?"

I ran my fingers along his delt muscle. "You give me too much credit, Coach, but thanks." I tried to calm my breathing. It was just the sound of the fire and the snow had made everything outside dead quiet. "A while ago, you said I could say anything and you wouldn't just me." It was a question as much as a statement.

"I meant it, Russ."

I squeezed his shoulder. "I guess I'm pretty young still... but I've never felt things click with another guy like they have with you."

"Not even with your boyfriends?" Ed asked quietly.

"Not even with my boyfriends," I said. "Listen, I know that probably came off weird and clingy and..."

"Russ..." Ed interrupted me. "Will you go on a date with me?" I could hear the tension and anxiety in his voice and when he turned to me I could see it in his eyes, too. "Sometime this week, before you go back..."

"I don't want to get you in trouble, Ed," I said. "You know, with your job or anything."

"We'll figure that out," he said. "But you didn't answer my question."

I realized I'd been afraid not of my answer but how much I wanted to give it. "Yes, I'd love that, Ed."

"Good," he said, patting my leg.

We kissed, softly. I pushed my tongue into his mouth first this time.

When we parted we had goofy grins on our faces.

"You know..." Coach S said as he traced his hand up my pectoral muscle and over my neck. "Even if people do find out or there's any gossip... it'll be so fucking worth it."

I laughed, only to have Coach cut me off with another kiss, guiding me back down to a reclining position on his couch.

THE END?