#beej thoughts

[leeeeeeeeech]

Been thinking about eldritch Beej a lot, and I'm in the process of polishing up my ao3 fic, but I just had to get a scene out of my head so enjoy :3

Fem! reader

Well, this was not how you anticipated your night going. The date started off well enough. The guy was cute, handsome even. He said all the right things, he was interesting, he was the perfect guy to take home to the folks….

But he wasn't Beetlejuice.

That was the issue. The kerfuffle if you will. The whole date, I couldn't stop thinking of that damn pervert. Imagining how he would react to what I said. Probably some fumbled sex joke instead of the polite cough I received in its stead. Polite, and superficial. Like a business meeting. Transactional intimacy at its finest. I got a goodnight kiss at least. But, all I could think about was what was missing. The lack of scratchy stubble, the smell of dirt, the grabby hands...

"No dice?" Beetlejuice had asked me. He had told me that guy seemed like a loser, not worth my time, yadda yadda. I remember rolling my eyes and muttering something about keeping his dirty shoes off my couch before storming off to my room. I could still feel the fiery white hot sensation in my chest as his echoing laugh followed me down the hall.

At first, I mistook it for annoyance. Beetlejuice always had something to say about my dating life. Nobody was good enough. I knew he just didn't like the idea of me giving my attention to someone else. He had to get over himself at some point!

Now, I'm in my bed, fucking myself with my fingers. Apparently the line between anger and horniness has dwindled significantly.

Go figure.

"Hmnn." I bit my lip, trying to keep myself quiet. It's been a while since I've masturbated, my pussy tingling deliciously as I furiously rubbed at it, growing impatient. All I wanted was to cum and go to sleep. I just wanted to forget my stupid feelings for the night. I could sort them out tomorrow.

A low growl reverberated throughout the room, making me freeze in place. A green glow filled the space, illuminating my room in a otherworldly light. The air seemed taught, like a string about to snap. My eyes darted around just as a low whine stretched itself from the doorway to me. Beetlejuice stood there, with an expression I didn't quite recognize.

I snapped out of whatever spell I was under, and covered myself with my blanket. He laughed, taking a step closer towards the bed.

"Little late for that toots."

He breathed in deep, his nostrils flaring. He closed his eyes, and that low rumble filled the room once again. Like thunder.

"Get out. I don't want you here." Another step towards the bed. His eyes shone in the dark, there glow held a primal power that made my insides throb with fear, or maybe desire. Hell, it was probably a little of both.

"We both know that one's a lie, Y/n~" He smirked, tugging on the blanket. I tightened my grip on it.

"N-No. I want you out." Wow, even I didn't believe myself. He chuckled, tearing the blanket away with ease. I snapped my legs together as the cold air hit my exposed sex.

"Don't be shy now, babes. I know you were thinking about me." He drawls. My face heats up at the declaration. He doesn't say anything regarding it, but I don't miss his shit eating grin.

" I can smell how wet ya are around me ya know," His eyes rake over me, and I feel like I'm burning underneath his gaze.

"I know you like it when I feel ya up." A set of hands appeared by my chest, giving my breasts a playful squeeze. I gasp, but there gone before I can do much else.

"It's been torture to hear ya practically scream for me in yer sleep." I can't get much more red at this point. This is humiliating, being emotionally eviscerated like this. I feel that familiar throb once again, like my ovaries are pounding at the door to the outside, begging for him.

"Whatever yer fantasizing, I can do sooo much better~" He winked, giving a small chuckle.

"Wha- why...?" My words caught in my throat as I felt something slimy wrap itself around my ankle. I look down and gasp as a tentacle waves at me before stretching itself towards my thigh, pulling my leg outward. My breath hitches, and I try to fight it.

"Never been one fer slowburns. Gets boring. I like a lotta action." Beetlejuice chuckled. Another tentacle appeared from behind him, diving straight for my other thigh, practically wrenching my leg open. I panted from the overexertion, and watched helplessly as Beetlejuice leaned forward, his arms boxing me in as he looked me up and down once again before meeting my eyes.

"You want me to stop, you know the words." All I do is nod, giving in to him. He smiled that signature toothy grin, before sliding down my torso. He gives a small bite to the inside of my thigh, making my breath shudder. He chuckled again.

"Don't worry, Y/n, I'll take very good care of you~" His tongue snaked its way out of his mouth, and made it's way towards my dripping sex.

[quenga-do-nordeste]

Beej calling his clones dumb like a proud father if he were the smartest person in the world

[skltart]

my guy. my number one guy <3

[i-really-like-phrogs]

Re-design of my un-named Beetlejuice OC from back when I was thirteen

Original Reference under the cut:

[mastersprogram]

“Oh Barbara, Your My Sandwich :]”

[butterflysnowflake]

man can I just say how adorable Wolf's interaction with Delia in the wedding scene is? When she's explaining her situation he gives her the most understanding looks and it's because they both effectively had the same cause of death. Delia turned her mourning of Charles into part of her performance art, and died from being scammed with asps who were NOT defanged. Wolf wanted to deliver the most authentic performance possible and died from presumably a negligent armorer who didn't bother to check if the grenade was live or not before shooting. both of them were quite literally killed by their art (not by their own faults to be fair but from someone else's irresponsibility). and it's kind of lovely Delia got such a sympathetic escort back to the netherworld who knows her situation firsthand probably better than anyone else

it's weirdly wholesome and empathetic even as their situations were both played for morbid laughs, and if Delia didn't have eyes only for Charles (what's left of him) and Wolf wasn't in a committed relationship with Janet I'd even say I could have seen things going somewhere between them

[herefortheships]

One great thing that can come out of Beetlejuice 3 ending with Lydia and Betelgeuse married, is that they can continue the story as a show if they want to, later on. An animated show, is what I mean, about Betelgeuse, Lydia, and Astrid. I could watch an animated series about their little family getting into all kinds of Neitherworld shenanigans.

[beetlebabber]

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I may have yanked the pose on the bottom left from this fanart here bc it made me feel things

[mimiscappinisideblog]

Winona

said

WHAT!?

[mash-or-pass]

Hawkeye is like Eurydice if Orpheus didn’t look back I’ll elaborate later

[juicedbeetle]

I know everyone already figured this probably but I hadn't paid attention before to when beej exactly takes his coat off and I was curious, so I'm pleased to report that he left it somewhere in the kitchen

not to mention he is briefly alone with adam in the kitchen while he was there getting the stuff for the sandwich

leaving aside my contemplation about how beej cannot affect the world of the living so those aren't coke, popcorn and 3d glasses he found in their house (probably manifested them himself the same way he takes the coat off. possibly from his mary poppins ass jacket, like with the mic) I like to think that he thought about getting them so he could snack alongside them, other than the obvious "upcoming show aka their death" use, not to mention the fact itself that he takes his coat off makes it feel like the mait's house is his as well, since you usually do it when you arrive home.

hell, I think he doesn't even need a coat whatsoever and just

started doing the "taking it off when I'm home" ritual because he saw adam doing it.

and in general I love this whole beginning part where he just acts like their house is his own, goes into their other rooms to do who knows what (first alone to the left then with adam in the kitchen), sits on their furniture like he owns the place, knows it like the back of his hand

actually I get the feeling that despite the fact he sat down first, he's also imitating adam here, like it's something the guy does all the time so beetlejuice has the whole thing memorized by now. but that's just speculation anyway.

I just get sad because I think he was really excited to meet them and already knew them really well, like he's not lying when he calls them friends, he's known them intimately for 10+ years (and, yes, it's been very creepy). he's lived with them and gotten used to this warm sitcom-y feel and then when they actually meet him they're terrified. Rightfully so but, ouch.

like, nothing goes like he planned right from the start, not just because they're not scary (and I mean, his whole plan was... to have them scare the new house inhabitants into saying his name? and then what? great plan beetleboose great thinking ahead there, a mastermind really), but because they didn't just magically act like his new best friends like he hoped and probably made up in his mind for all those years 😵‍💫

I mean, for all his solitude... the guy totally talks to himself. all the time. that is just a given to me. even besides the clones, the hand thing in say my name, the soliloquy, the guy probably had full fledged conversations. I can hardly imagine how many times he fantasized about talking to the maits for the first time in very elaborate scenarios in his head not to mention participated to all their conversations in the same way he does in this beginning segment and basically took it for granted that they'd enjoy his company same way he enjoys theirs, that is to say, the idealized version of their company he created in his head. siiigh, I love this whole part a lot, you can tell.

[i-really-like-phrogs]

I’ve decided the world needs more Beetlebones. Badly drawn or not.. here I come!

[rexscanonwife]

One thing that I will say about me potentially bringing beej back (she says as she fills her drafts with posts about him) is the dynamic has to shift DRASTICALLY for it to work with the way I am now vs the way I was when I was obsessed with him

I was drawn to him because I had a desperate need to BE needed and his pathetic clinginess fit the bill, among other things like relating to his mother issues 😂 but im a healthier person now overall! And tbh I've never been happier in my life, with my partner, with everything 💖💖 I think in order for it to work he ALSO needs to improve and strive to be better and happier and idk...maybe that's beautiful!

I'm thinking maybe it's more of a slow burn because he really needs to learn how to be a FRIEND first before he can be in a healthy romantic relationship. So I'm imagining after he's had some time to reflect on his mistakes from the musical he ends up in me and my partner's house and we just...hang! We play games and watch movies and fuck around and he has a silly rivalry with my partner and he's given the opportunity to just BE happier and eventually down the line it just becomes something a little more ☺️

[whatthefuckisasweep]

i rlly love needy characters that have never felt an ounce of affection so when they feel that little spark of it - whether its someone being nice to them like ONE time or whether they randomly fall in love or they IDOLIZE someone too deeply - they just do NOT know how to act and proceed to explode things, throw tantrums, have mental breakdowns, and/or come up with reasons why they should hang around that make everything worse

[amrv-5]

doing what i do to get through every less than ideal Situation: imagining beejhawk about it

[stinkyhorsebitch]

I am just in the process of cutting all the parts for the beetlejuice pants out and now it just looks like his pants exploded in my bedroom.