#and then I feel bad

[pixlokita]

Being in fandoms is weird because you can dislike a character in some aus and feel bad for them in others or like them in a few depending on people’s interpretations of them

[sheree-says-stuff]

having a high sex drive and being raised in a sex-negative house had absolutely horrific effects on me. now I'm horny AND guilty about everything.

[medicsbigburlychest]

when the social event is so unbearable you feel yourself starting to get pissed off at everyone around you and your body starts to bother you and all you want to do is leave and be alone but you can't so it feels your stuck in limbo

[caressthosecheekbones]

🌸💕 for being kind and lovely, have a kiss on the forehead! pass it on to 10 people 💕🌸

omg @lfg1986-2 🥺 thank you so much 🪷 have a waffle 🧇💕 and right back to you ✨🥰

[divine0rdainment]

Me and my friends when I use REALLY dark humor to lighten a situation and unintentionally make everyone else depressed.

[onlydigressing]

Aspec Rants

I dislike hearing about my friend’s boyfriend. I’m very tired. I realize that I’m so tired of trying to understand myself and the relationships I want, I have very little patience for her. And I wonder if i’m jealous, and it unfortunately strikes a chord. 

Am I jealous of her relationship? Well, a little. I want romance. But it’s more that I’m jealous of the concept of a significant other, and that she knows who she likes. I’m jealous of how easy it is for her to like someone, I’m jealous that she’s attracted to people right off that bat. 

And I know that isn’t fair. She can’t help how she feels anymore than I can. I think it’s just that her talking and being a “normal” (heteronormative) teenager serves to remind me that I am different, every single time. It hurts. It’s repetitive. I don’t like it. 

[o0fyuu0o]

I am once more wishing I was a multi shipper just so I can feel the same hype as my friend discovering a new ship

[daremna]

the absolute unimaginable horrors of starting a new job and observing all the employees with already established friendships talk and laugh while youre standing there like

[skrunksthatwunk]

see 0 note flop posts aren't that bad when they're personal but 0 note fandom posts feel literally so bad. like if you don't wanna play toys with me anymore just say that. i'll pack up my super cool awesome things and go and i'll sit on the other side of the playground by myself and i won't even look at you. fuck

[christadeguchi]

i'll let phie-san say it:

[wanologic]

sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool

[gnawjaw]

blueryehgddgaaerrggggggg I hate working I hate my stupid job I hate getting up at 5 in the morning to go to said stupid hated job. I NEED to live my life dude I need to be unemployed, but I HAVE to work. I don't even want to go in anymore

[squarecloud73]

*I worship you Tumblr please don’t remove it

傳達不到的一些東西

Dumb school girl crush

[red-riot-gives-you-wings]

i think you mean left to right

Whoops, lol 😂 I’ve been reading manga so much I messed that up. It’s been a long week for me trying to get stuff done. Thank you for catching my mistake

[calvinandhobbes]

laughing at memes about the assassination attempt while feeling a deep deep dread so profound that my stomach hurts. thats the american way ig

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?