#and on top of that i also genuinely think most everyone is much smarter than me in many regards

[lyxthen]

I want to write an essay on how the Book of Bill expertly subverts the "villain with a tragic backstory/antisocial protagonist" narrative by portraying its main character as evil, trying really hard to look cool, and failing pathetically. The book is making fun of him, and that is actually kind of revolutionary, because most stories with evil, pathetic main characters tend to take themselves, and by extension, their protagonist, way too seriously, with way too much dignity, which leads to people misinterpreting them as heroes or idealize them in some way, and then replicating these harmful attitudes. They follow life coaches that will teach them how to be "alpha males."

Bill presents himself as one of these "life coaches," he will teach you the secrets of the universe, he will help you to game the system in your favor, to manipulate people to get what you want, he will free you from the shackles of society and reality itself-- but he is lying. The success rate of Bill's evil schemes is laughably small. He's a manipulator, to be sure, an incompetent one. His dimension rejected him, his friends don't actually like him, throughout the ages humans have found him insufferable, and to top it all off he ruins the relationship with the only being in the history of the universe he has ever truly felt understood by.

And instead of going "gee, maybe there *is* something wrong with me, after all" he doubles down on his harmful ideas. He doesn't have a problem, everyone else is the problem. Nobody gets his vision. They are all small-minded creatures of no value. His failures are always somebody else's fault. He didn't want to hurt anyone, he was forced to. It's not that bad, he's just being silly, he's having a laugh.

And we, as readers, we are horrified at all the bad things he does, but we also laugh. Not with him, but *at him.* He is being constantly ridiculed by himself, and the funniest part is that he doesn't even realize. He thinks he is absolutely acing this.

He isn't.

Eventually, it is revealed that Bill has no idea what he is talking about. That he has been defeated, rendered powerless, stuck forever in interdimensional therapy. The book tells us, "This is what happens to people like Bill if they don't change. They end up with nothing. No riches, no fame, no loved ones. They will be unhappy forever unless they realize there is something about them worth changing and decide to act on it."

This is in contrast to Stanford, someone who, just like Bill, was deeply hurt and rejected by society, struggled to feel understood, and took refuge in a narcissistic (bear with me-) view of the world. Diagnostic labels aside, Ford genuinely thinks he is better than everyone else for being smarter. He is a textbook Aspie Supremacist that swears by IQ tests because it's the only thing that has ever validated him. That's why he gets along with Bill, I think, they really *have* compatible mindsets. Ford really thought Rudolph should've killed the other reindeer. He constantly dismisses Fiddleford in what feels a very classist way (even if he grew up working class himself). Ford isn't manipulative and malicious in the same way Bill is, and I don't want anyone coming at me for saying Ford is evil. He isn't. He might be a bit of an ass, but he has a moral code, he knows that what Bill wants to do is A BAD THING and dedicates his life to trying to stop him. Stanford's biggest flaw is not appreciating the people around him more for their inherent value (not that he doesn't love them! he does!), but he learns, and he changes. He is more considerate of other people's needs and their perspectives.

And by the end, he is happy. He is free from Bill, he has his family, people who will support him unconditionally and will put up with his nonsense because they love him.

Stanford will never find someone who is as smart as him, who has been ostracized the same way he has. But that's okay. He has an inherent value as a person that has nothing to do with how smart he is in comparison to other people. He doesn't need other people's approval to be happy.

That is, I think, what the book wants you to take away. Don't be like Bill. Don't fall for the Alpha Male scam, or eugenics, some new age cult or multilevel marketing scheme, reject the ideas at the base. Talk to your family and friends, touch grass, find a group that shares your interests, but don't dwell endlessly on resentment, and don't follow people that tell you that the only way to be valuable is to be "superior" in some abstract metric, and that they can teach you how.

(As a kid, I almost fell down the alt-right pipeline-- and I am Mexican, transgender, and autistic. I fantasized about blowing up the school every day. I know what the fuck I am talking about when I tell you this.)

They are lying. You don't want to be like them.

You don't want to be like Bill.

[holyhakunon]

i have recently been finding it harder to communicate with my peers in social, professional, and online settings bc i genuinely think everyone is more curious and much smarter than i am lol

[erimeows]

TFA Characters' Toxic Traits

Me with another TFA headcanon set? Who would've guessed. Got the inspiration for this one after realizing I'd done it with MysMes but not with Transformers. Enjoy!

Optimus Prime: Shoulders every single burden all by himself. Will not ask for help and open up to others when needed, even though not doing so ends up negatively impacting everyone more in the end than asking for help would've.

Bumblebee: Toxic positivity- enough said. You vent to him and he's like "oh but you have so much to be happy about!".

Bulkhead: Will not take sides in any conflict of his own accord even if he knows that one side is "right" if he fears it will upset any of his friends. Passively steps out of conflicts even when he's needed, unless it's an absolute emergency.

Ratchet: Refuses to open up about trauma that he has even though it affects the way he acts and negatively impacts the people around him, who are very confused as to why he acts the way he does.

Prowl: Has an ungodly superiority complex, tends to think he's better or smarter than others (even when he's not), though he's trying to work on that.

Sentinel Prime: I think we saw in the show, but he's very prideful and will never admit that he's wrong in any situation. Also terrible at offering genuine apologies- more of a sarcastic "I'm sorry you feel that way" than a genuine "I'm sorry I did (x)" kind of guy.

Jazz: Gets uncomfortable when things get too serious to the point that if people try to open up to him about something deep, he will change the subject or deflect them 90% of the time.

Ultra Magnus: Too by the book. Will do things that he doesn't believe in or ignore wrong doings for the sake of legality.

Megatron: Very selfish and very charming, which is a bad combo. Similar to Starscream, he will be nice to your face if needed and then screw you over in the end as long as it benefits him.

Starscream: So many, but the worst one is lying to people's face and then talking shit behind their backs or doing them wrong for his own benefit.

Blitzwing: Depends on which of the three personalities you're dealing with because they all have some pretty over the top toxic traits, but the worst and most prevalent one is that all three of them tend to belittle others to feel better about themselves- especially if their life is going bad or if they're feeling insecure about something in particular.

Lugnut: The Megatron obsession, obviously. It gets to the point that anyone and anything else in his life that should be prioritized get(s) pushed to the side for Megatron's sake when Megatron doesn't value him nearly as much.

Blackarachnia: Very vengeful and obsessive about getting revenge to the point that it's unhealthy. Obviously this is seen in her TFA episodes where she wants revenge on Optimus/Sentinel for what happened when they were in school- but those emotions are over a huge tragedy that happened in her life and are almost understandable. This toxic trait also applies to, say, someone who accidentally shoulder checked her or took her lunch from the staff fridge. If you wrong her in the slightest, she will make sure she has revenge, even if it was a genuine mistake.

Lockdown: Can't handle commitment. He's not scared of it, just not emotionally mature enough. Whether it be a job, a friendship, a romantic relationship, or whatever else, he won't commit. He doesn't care whose feelings it hurts or if he's passing up on something genuinely good for himself either.

Swindle: Also can't handle commitment, but I'd argue that his worst toxic trait is actually his concern for money. He's terrified of being broke to the point that it consumes his every waking minute. Sure, he enjoys the swindling, but if he misses out on money he panics and he will go to ridiculous lengths to get a good deal or to rip someone off.

[kremlin]

i actually do know who needs to hear this, it’s most people, in fact, it’s likely you, statistically; we are entering the american election campaign season, and there are caveats i’d like you to be aware of, and to that effect, i am cashing in on my many years of demonstrated knowledge about The Computer.

you indeed cannot trust what you read on the internet. someone will, indeed, go on here and tell lies. this is no shocker to you, you know this, i know this, i know you know this, but i insist you think about it.

you must know my beliefs regarding conspiracy theories fall far, far to one side of the spectrum: i do not believe them. i dismiss them out of hand on principle. axiomatically. and i am here today to tell you the concept, existence, execution, and proximity of paid, phony, engagement-manipulated, political advertisement is not only real, it is the status quo.

would you describe yourself to others as:

A.) smarter than than they think you are

or

B.) not as dumb as they think you are

if you responded with option A, you are more than likely to be greatly more susceptible to these underhanded messages than you think. option B respondent’s outlook is brighter, only relatively. to restate this in a more digestible way, there are two wolves inside you, one takes top-voted comments to reddit posts on face value. the other, takes top-voted comments to reddit posts on face value. you take top-voted comments to reddit posts on face value.

those responsible for such comments are effective in their endeavors, because they think about it. they do not approach their work mystically nor inefficiently. they know what to say to you, because they know what language you speak.

a thoughtless individual would read one of the only proper noun phrases in this post, “american election season”, and limit their perspective to exactly two possible entities to watch out for. this individual has, with a pep in their step and a whistle on their lips, stepped directly on a land mine. maybe this individual was you, if so, don’t sweat it, allow me to yank you away at the last moment by your shirt collar. there's tertiary actors at play, and possibly even more, if only we could invent a word that mean's "the fourth thing" and so on

a very large, very easily guessable country has, for some time now, engaged in organized astroturfing or misinformation or disinformation or whatever-you-want-to-call-it campaigns, to great effect, with their angle being to flood the airwaves with so much conflicting information that you, the individual, feel hopeless, and lose your confidence in discerning truth from fiction.

i use this example not because that country or my country or this election or whatever is a key component here, they're not, this applies to everyone using the internet socially, and if you don't think there are disingenuous actors' words appearing on your computer screen at some regular rate, you're also stepping on a landmine.

you just have to think about things, and maybe, from time to time, turn on an electric stove and put your finger on it to remind yourself that there is indeed a very real, objective reality we live in, and that if you find yourself asking, "how can we see if our eyes aren't real", someone has put rats in your head

it goes beyond just politics though, hell, i would describe all of modern marketing to use essentially these same tricks. don't fall for them! my technique is to just approach any written text found online, most especially "comments", with the same utter hater energy as salieri in amadeus.

and hey, while you're at it, pass this thinking along to kids, they're kind-of the first generation that has to deal with an internet that is mostly ingenuine meaningless bullshit, not like we had it, when it was mostly genuine meaningless bullshit.

[badchoicesworld]

Heyyyy I really love ur writing! And also kind of ur vibe as a person 😳 but anyway!

Since you said we can be specific, I wanted to ask about Hobie getting a just a little bit flustered when receiving genuine heartfelt compliments and affection through words bc it catches him off guard. He'd also find the reader a bit naive at first only to find out that they're actually incredibly cunning and calculated. They just come across as naive bc they're so ridiculously sweet once they trust someone :3 (and it always looks like they trust quickly bc they have insane psychoanalytic abilities but now I'm rambling;;; (⁠´⁠⊙⁠ω⁠⊙⁠`⁠)! )

Hope this isn't too much ^^"

hobie realises you’re not as naive as he thought

hobie brown x gn!reader

omggg 😳 tyy anonnnn you got me blushing n shit 🤭 but no fr, ty that’s so sweet lmao <33 and no, this was perfect, ily

warnings: none

pairing: hobie brown x gn!reader

requests: masterlist plz

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

on first inspection, to hobie, you appear to be this person that trusts way too easily and immediately treats people way too kind for a person you just met- you seem clueless and completely naive when it comes to putting your trust in others since you’re so quick to do it

hobie doesn’t think it’s a bad trait at all to be inherently kind, but when you’re kind to literally everyone you immediately deem trustworthy, it’s like you’re looking to get hurt

he might occasionally have one of his rants to you about the ins and outs of the “real world”, propaganda that surrounds you, distracting you from the truth, the sharks at the top of it all, the people that would take advantage of you

there’s no ill intent, he just really thinks you’re gonna get hurt like that

and who wants that ?

so yeah, anyway, when he first meets you, he can basically see the switch once you’ve realised he’s trust worthy

you’re the sweetest person ever without prompt, and it admittedly looks like nativity to him at first

but because you now trust him, it means you’ll be a sweetheart to him

at first, it’s small compliments that he can appreciate- maybe something about his style or rebellious attitude that he’s heard all before

but you suddenly amp it up for no reason one day and it just completely turns the tides

if you’re aware of his secret identity, you change his perception of you completely when you basically soul read him

you manage to craft the most heartfelt, genuine, sincere acknowledgement of the sacrifices he’s made, along with genuine thanks and somehow stating the closest interpretation of his emotions that he’s ever heard before. from someone that isn’t him, anyway

hell, you’ve maybe even just helped him realise a few things about himself

he’s fucking gobsmacked

he stares at you as if you’ve just said the most outrageous but enlightening thing ever to be uttered

slack jawed, eyes wide, completely silenced for a solid while

he’s eventually able to process wtf you just said to him, and now he’s just trying to play it off with a really goofy grin that doesn’t hide he’s flustered

hobie’s doing all sorts with his hands to try distract the both of you- gestures while he tried to defend the little of his pride he has left, holding the back of his neck, maybe nudging you or shaking your whole frame

he gets the faintest idea that you might be just a little less naive than he though, but not entirely

that might have just been a lucky guess, after all

you’re definitely smarter in his eyes, though

depending on your status, if you’re a spider-person, from a different dimension, from his dimension- it doesn’t matter, he’s intrigued by you now

might brag a bit or be like “can you believe this?” when he sees you soul reading someone else

now there’s been multiple times throughout your guys’ friendship where you manage to slap him with some ungodly wisdom relating to him out of absolutely nowhere, and it never fails to catch him off guard

of course, hobie’s effortlessly cool, so being caught off guard is gonna keep making him feel a little vulnerable and flustered

especially when you just casually do one of the most in depth psychoanalysis of him ever for like the third time this week

he’s starting to think that you know something the rest of the multiverse doesn’t, how do you do that ?

“alright, alright! allow it, man, allow it.”

he’s laughing, but he’s also questioning where you stand in the world, are you secret intelligence ? tf is goin on

if you weaponise this ability to read people like an open book, then he can have fun with it

now it’s funny

especially if you guys are spider-people together and he just casually points out a villain you’ve been assigned to, with a look that says “ruin them”

this can also happen to random people on the street

it’s like how he can completely destroy peoples perception and faith in the establishment n all that, if you so choose, you can really make people feel seen or completely vulnerable or called out

after these encounters with bad people, he realises something about you

you’re somehow able to just know who to trust, and your guts never wrong

he wonders if it’s your spider-sense at first, if you have that

now he’s starting to piece everything together

you can easily distinguish between the good and bad people- the good you immediately trust and treat like an old friend

the bad, you never give the time of day

you’re always so quick to trust, and naive

but it’s starting to become clear to hobie that this isn’t nativity, you just have an uncanny ability to know people before they even introduce themselves

it’s kind of reassuring in a way, if he’s ever doubtful about someone, he’ll go to you and be like “thoughts?” then you can relay this insanely detailed psychoanalysis of this person you’ve just met

now he sees you as this incredibly insightful person, a lovely individual who has the potential to ruin lives with your insane ability to call people out

bonus:

if you guys are spider-people together, you’re both pretty well known for running your mouths

you instil fear

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

as always, lemme know if this ate or not and i’ll try my best to fix it !

[pilferingapples]

tagged by @earthly-apples to list my Top Ten musicals! thank you!

these are not the 10 I think are Objectively the Best in the World, just 10 of the ones I like most, For Reasons , and in no particular order:

1-Les Miserables, just getting this one done and cleared away bc everyone knows it's gonna be here anyway XD I am very aware of the problems it has (especially with Cammack happening to it over the years) but I also think it's genuinely one of the best musicals ever made. The musical paralleling? incredible, honestly never have heard it equaled.

2- Paint Your Wagon, Movie Version Only: I cannot even START to talk about this masterpiece or we'll be here all day. Every character in it is a terrible person. It's got an absolutely canon throuple. Both Clint Eastwood and Lee Marvin sing. They are both bad at it. A deconstructed Western without making a big deal out of it, with Manifest Destiny being a not-even-thinly-veiled name for some of the worst excesses of colonization. This show is so much smarter than people want it to be. I have to shut up or this section will become an essay but anyway Watch Paint Your Wagon. 3-Newsies, stage version only: nothing but nonstop pro-union slam hits! And the choreo , holy crap! don't love the mandatory romance (romance has never felt mandatorier) but I do love Katherine herself and also everything else about this show, I have it on loop in my playlists and in my heart <3

4-Pirates of Penzance: gotta have a G&S musical here and this is my fave fave of theirs :D 5- Little Shop of Horrors, movie OR play, pure fun faustian plant bargain :D 6- Hello Dolly :dgkhsdlgh many of these are. Not cheery. But this one is! Sometimes I just like a bit of marshmallow fluff! and all the songs in this one are so fun and I love the various Levels of romances in it. 7- How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying -on the one hand this is such a simple and even cliché little comedy and on the other holy shit it's so cynical , I love it

8-Titanic-*gross sobbing noises* 9- One Bite- gad I feel so hipster going with "limited run local apocalypse comedy musical about zombies taking over the world as part of an alien plan to reclaim earth for the dinosaurs" but it's TRUE, I play this soundtrack for myself so much, and it was so fun to watch! 10- Ernest Shackleton Loves Me -who amongst us has not sought inspiration from the reconstructed version of historical figures they carry in their heart. WHO. ON THIS SIDE OF TUMBLR. Tell me it's you and I'll call you a liar. I have a zillion things to say about it and like ten people have watched it lmao , but it got me through the Worst Week and I love it forever.

Honorable mention to Repo Man , as a representative of all the shows I enjoy only small bits of. Good? Arguably No! But it DOES feature Zydrate, which as we all know, comes in a little glass vial.

ETA: I forgot to tag people! Tagging @pureanonofficial, @bewareofitalics, @wilwywaylan, @alicedrawslesmis, @himitsusentaiblog, @excessively-english-jd annnnd oh geez that's already so many!! Play along if you feel like it!

[talkingbl]

Only Friends Alignment Chart: Ep. 1 (aka Only Friends Evil Meter)

Top: Arrogant SOB but also hard to read. A lot of people straight up think he’s the devil incarnate (or, alternatively, worships the ground he walks on in light of TopMew), but I don’t quite get either conclusion. I genuinely can’t tell what he wants and feel suspicious of him either way. He just seems a little too practiced at this whole getting with Mew thing… For now, Top is lawful evil.

Mew: He’s being set up as the type of guy who everyone thinks is kinder/smarter/better than other people, but is, in reality, just as flawed as everyone else. While he seems somewhat more wholesome than the others, he is exposing himself as a bit of a neglectful friend. For now, Mew is lawful good.

Ray: Hands-down the most infuriating character. My heart aches for people like Ray in real life who struggle with low self esteem and alcoholism. It’s Ray’s other actions and traits that get me. He’s so condescending and bratty (and not in a good way). He’s always thinking of himself first and not how his actions might impact his friends or other people. Ray gives chaotic evil.

San(d): I don’t know what to think about him besides that he’s an overall nice guy. He’s a little preachy at times but that type of stern, parent-like energy is exactly what Ray thinks he needs (assuming he does have daddy issues). It’s weird though because I feel like we got more RaySan(d) this episode than anything else, but San(d) still somehow feels like a side character while Top, Mew, Boston, and Ray feel much more fleshed out (though this is probably because most of his screen time is spent reacting to Ray rather than proactively moving the plot forward). He’s true neutral right now.

Boston: He is so evil-coded lmao. But honestly, I don’t know if it’s due to Neo’s portrayal or other factors, but I walked away from this episode feeling more sympathetic toward Boston than any other character. He seems like a complicated person who always gets in his own way. This doesn’t make him evil IMO, it just makes him human. He’s (controversial) chaotic neutral.

Nick: Okay so Nick comes off as chaotic good. He just seems like he’s really interested in Boston and is also a true freak. Much like Boston’s character, this does not make him evil. In truth, we’ve probably not seen enough of Nick to say one way or the other, but the babygirlism is strong with this one and I have no proof that he will try to hurt anyone so far.

Cheum: She reminds me so much of Sandee of KMA/DBK fame or Yihwa of TWM, if not a tad bit oblivious. She cannot read a room for shit but is trying her best in a friend group full of messy gays and dumbasses. She is relatively harmless but is the epitome of a side character that is more like a plot device than a true character as of now. She’s neutral good.

Yo: Lawful neutral until further notice.

[nerdyenby]

Aqua time :D I’m watching H’s vod

Pregame

The calm before the storm is worse, 100% agree. The event is amazing but the wait before and after the end are such low lows

H and Dave just vibing :))

“False is here too?! Surely something must’ve been scheduled” I love H so much

“It’s been 1,217 days since I’ve won MCC, but who’s counting?” “… You?” I think I’ve seen a grand total of one Dave Krtzyy video but between finding out they’re nonbinary, this joke, and the raw vibes??? I love him

Talking about how the npc cat is thick AND smarter than all of them combined is killing me

Dave saying they hope sands of time “will do from my enemy to my lover” 😭

False is so funny she doesn’t get enough credit

Parkour Tag

Cub cracked????

False did such a good job hunting we need to talk about it

I got so startled by Beky getting H I slammed my elbow into my desk lol

Rocket Spleef

Dave Krtzy having banger opinions left and right, good for them

He really is just saying stuff and all of its iconic, from “the rare true democracy” to “channel your inner elytra”

People taking the time to type during rocket spleef will never not be funny to me

Everyone hitting Jimmy is so Jimmy of him

False top 5 :))

Dave top 10 after getting 35th??? We love that improvement

Phil is never not an icon

Unfortunate minecraft physics, rip

H and Dave being 19th and 20th is so funny because I was like “buddies :D” and H said “I’m beating you, suck it”

H affectionately bullying Dave is my new favorite thing, actually

Sands of Time

“I uh don’t have the best track record at uh…. being good at sands of time” Dave 😭

“Hi HBomb!!” from H and his teammates is so sweet

I love the calm vibes, no frantic strategizing, just clarifying and communicating

“Dave I’m gonna be pestering and annoying the hell out of you” “As you should” I love them

H: “Has anyone seen the blue pathway” also H: *is currently in the blue pathway* my streamer’s oblivious /lh

False 9th and everyone hyping her up :D

Sky Battle

I love skybattle I swear but I was zoned out like the entire time

H killing Sniff :( my boys :((

Dave was so sad when they fell, it’s okay dude <333

Good plays in round 3!!!

Ace Race

Merely vibing

H popped off and didn’t even think anything of it, the raw power

Battle Box

Aw don’t love that slump where everyone stops listening to each other. It happens with most teams, it’s not their fault, people just get too in their own heads

False literally said it was their side like three times :(

That round was clean

The final round coming down to Purpled on 2 health vs Dave on 1 was such a good final fight, holy crap

Grid Runners

Best game time :D

They’re improving every round, I love that for them

I don’t think I properly appreciated how fast cyan’s crafting grove was before just now

They slayed waterfall lamps tho

H’s mind, man

I love when people who are historically more withdrawn take charge without hesitation, MCC has done so much for H’s confidence <3

Omg they got first????

“God, our minds are so huge compared to these dorks” “MASSIVE!!”

Own that confidence kings!! Love that for them <33

H is such a cool guy, he’s genuinely enthusiastic about how they’re 2nd without a top 10 individual. He just thinks it’s neat. He’s a top player who doesn’t care about stats but experience, and that’s what makes him the epitome of MCC :)

H saying “if another team goes nutty and gets a massive amount of fruitberries points or whatever then they deserve it, they can take our spot” WHAT DID I JUST SAY?? We stan one (1) cishet white guy here and it’s HBomb94

TGTTOSAWAF

Dave’s speech <333 I love them

I felt H’s stress there, that was so intense but he popped off

Dave doing an AMAZING speed bridge and then complimenting H’s strat, they’re so supportive I love them sm

“Sorry Dave, I’m gonna lower your points for things like that, cause you could’ve gotten first in that” “No, I do not care about that, I care about that sweet, succulent coin… that was a weird way to describe it”

The new finalist announcement is so suspenseful only to ruin it with a bubble sound effect lol

They’re so excited to get Dave their first win since MCC1 :))

They find it so cool that they got here without any top 10 individuals “purely balanced”

Dodgebolt

“Last time I was in dodgebolt I was a wee lad […] I was freshly 21, now I’m like 48 or something”

INSTANT he/they on he/they violence by Dave Krtzy lol

Aqua’s accuracy is wild, goodness!!!!

Their coms are so clean

H snatching that arrow!! I don’t even remember that from watching cyan

False calming asserting that she knows what she needs, not them, will never not be iconic

False saying that she’s down next arrow only for all her team to talk over eachother about how she’s got this and they believe in her <3

FALSE SUPREMACY!!!!! THAT 1V3!!!!!!!

Dave winning the first events of seasons 1 and 3 my beloved

FALSE DONT NEED PRACTICE

“False, that was insane, you 1v3’d that” “WHAT THE HECK WAS I DOING??” “You we WINNING, that’s what you were doing, you fool”

“1,217 days, bro” “It’s zero, it’s zero now!!” I love them

This team <33333

The most well-rounded team of all time, I love them.

Or as False puts it: “we weren’t cracked, we were just solid”

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #604

Top Ten Ghosts from Ghosts

This week sees the final series of the superlative Ghosts, and that’s a sentence with more alliteration than I’d expected when it began. It kind of got away from me a little bit there, but I shall attempt to wrangle the wrest of my writing into order.

Or something.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Ghosts. It’s pretty great. It’s a typical British comedy about people trapped in a situation they can’t escape and forced to share their lives with other people they would ordinarily avoid, and end up developing into a loving surrogate family over time, but without any of the wishy-washy stuff an American version of the sitcom would probably force onto the plot. Where Ghosts excels is in both its writing and its performances; it’s genuinely hilarious, which is nice, but the cast are also gifted actors capable of bringing out the warmth and humanity even in the dodgiest or flimsiest of characters. Plus it makes the most of its setting, giving us classic horror tropes and – emerging by degrees – its own brand of supernatural lore, with the ghosts all longing to be “sucked off”.

And now the end is near, and I can’t help but feel there’s going to be something really heartbreaking about it. I think it will feel like one last goodbye to old friends. Although I kinda thought that about Guardians 3 and James Gunn basically decided “everybody lives” and gave all the Guardians their own happy ending (which isn’t the same as being sucked off).

So to celebrate this momentous occasion – and because it’s a great way to kick off the spooky season – I’m now going to rank my favourite spooks in a sitcom; my favourite poltergeists in a programme; my favourite ghosts in Ghosts. Good, eh?

Julian (Simon Farnaby): it’d be very easy for Julian to be a one-note joke; a lecherous and corrupt Tory MP who died in a sex scandal and has to spend the afterlife with no trousers. But Julian is allowed all kinds of subtleties and nuances; despite his multiple vices, his care for his fellow ghosts (and living humans) frequently bubbles up, as does an occasional bubble of regret over his life choices. It’s a really slow-burn, empathetic development of character, as Julian is really still rather reprehensible; but we love him and want him to succeed. And that one-note joke is just persistently funny.

Robin (Laurence Rickard): a caveman whose guttural pidgin utterances can be the source of great amusement; as can the contrast between his prehistoric values (he appears to have married his sister) and the present day. But again it’s a character full of nuance; he’s much smarter and more sensitive than he first appears. And he’s really funny, with a terrific makeup job.

Pat (Jim Howlick): an over-earnest Scouts leader with an arrow through his neck, my love for Pat isn’t really based on nuanced empathy or slowly unpeeling layers of development; he’s pretty much all there day one. But he’s so damn funny, a tour-de-force from Howlick as this organisational nerd, a nice guy determined to keep everyone happy. Probably has the funniest death scene. “You don’t want to see this in your dreams.”

The Captain (Ben Willbond): an uptight, overwound British officer, all stiff upper lift and starched sheets, with an almost Melchett-level Tasche. There’s a lot of fun and nuance right there, but it’s the Captain’s closeted nature that elevates him even higher; the tragedy of his repressed life and the double tragedy that now, about eighty years after he died, he still can’t be honest about himself. Yes, it’s sad, but it’s an informed and beautiful sadness that has something to say. And sometimes it’s really funny too.

Kitty (Lolly Adefope): I could talk again about how Kitty has shades and subtleties that are slowly teased by the writing and performance as the show has developed, but really Kitty’s here because Adefope is damn funny. An almost stupidly naïve character, fantastically childlike, an innocent soul in search of a sister. She’s just great.

Fanny (Martha Howe-Douglas): from comically naïve to comically repressed, Fanny is a puritanical matriarch for whom nothing is good enough and everything is filthy. Of course, this is all mask and projection, and like most of the ghosts here she had a rather tragic life that shaped her death. It’s this juxtaposition between the passions that enflame her (she fancies Kiell Smith-Bynoe’s Mike) and her snotty demeanour that brings the funny. Plus it’s a simply transformative performance.

Mary (Katy Wix): Mary is far more down-to-earth, from her broken malapropism-riddled Black Country dialogue to her matter-of-fact allusions to the more red-blooded facts of medieval life. His sets her apart from a lot of the more repressed characters, and her misunderstandings and failures to grasp modern concepts are also really funny. She also has the terrific hook of having been burnt at the stake.

Thomas (Mathew Baynton): surprisingly low down really, for such a great character and performance. Vainglorious lovesick poet Thomas wanted to be Byron but was shot down (literally) in his prime. His flowery dialogue, his inappropriate pining for Charlotte Ritchie’s Alison, and the frequent gulfs between his ideals and aspirations and the harsh reality of his life and death are all sources of great humour.

Sir Humphrey (Laurence Rickard): a more minor character than others, but a great one. Again it’s basically one gag writ large, as Humphrey had his head cut off and so his ghost is likewise decapitated; his body frequently losing his noggin (or vice versa, I suppose). Humphrey’s head’s grumpy but resigned demeanour when faced with always getting misplaced or lost or put down in the wrong place is priceless. Also: props to Rickard for two great roles here.

The Plague Victims: pretty much all the cast return as the ghosts of an entire village laid low by the plague, destined to spend eternity stuck in a cellar together. That’s all nice and hilarious of course, but the way they’ve become experts on their tiny world (teaching Alison and Mike how to repair the boiler) and their various interactions with the ghosts on the floors above are doubly, triply terrific.

[balanceoflightanddark]

Thanks for the tag @waterfire1848

1. Avatar: The Last Airbender, Azula: Honestly some of you should've seen this coming. She's one of the characters I connected with the most. Her struggles felt real. Her triumphs were energizing. And her fall was...well it was heartbreaking. I am glad she finally got a one-shot, but honestly she deserves a lot more.

2. Godzilla, Godzilla: You should've also seen this coming. Guy's a pop culture icon and has cast a shadow over media for 70 plus years. And he's STILL going with a great movie being released this month. Hero. Villain. It doesn't matter because he's not going anywhere.

3. Kung Fu Panda, Po: I'll be honest, this guy was my hero growing up. Or one of them at least. As someone who grew up having low self-esteem and wanting to not be...himself, Po was legitimately inspiring since his struggles felt so real. Which made it all the more sweeter when he genuinely became that hero he always wanted to be.

4. Mass Effect, Wrex: In a series filled with awesome characters and thought-provoking stories, Wrex is, in my opinion, on top of the list. A disillusioned bounty hunter who is counting down the days till his race goes extinct regains his will to fight for a better future and redeem his people. There's something...I guess you can say that's human about his arc.

5. Fire Emblem: Three Houses, Edelgard: I made a whole post detailing why she's my favorite. Destined to be a weapon and a monster, she rejects that fate and frees Fodlan from the real enemies in the Church of Seiros. She's inspiring. She's charismatic...and she hides in her bedroom when her teacher sees the fanart she made of them.

6. Naruto, Kaguya Otsutsuki: ...okay okay. I get she's not the best-written character in the world. I'd even argue she has so much wasted potential. Still, I felt she was a powerhouse and I do have a lot of fun coming up with headcanons and analyzing what little we do get of her. Plus she's extremely hot.

7. The Lion King 1994, Simba: He was one of my favorite Disney heroes growing up, and that really hasn't changed all that much. Goes from a carefree kid who's excited to be king into a wise leader who frees the Pride Lands. While he's not the most original character out there, his character arc was pretty powerful and is still one of the best Disney has to offer.

8. Beast Wars, Dinobot: Well if anybody wants to know my favorite redemption arc, here you go. Dinobot started out as a begrudging ally of the Maximals who, despite having a code of honor, often butted heads with the heroes (especially Rattrap) since he was still an opportunistic Predacon. At first. Over time though, his rough edges begin to smooth out considerably and he becomes more noble. Up to the point he makes the ultimate sacrifice to save mankind and screw over Megatron's plans to atone for his sins. Primal said it best: "He lived a warrior, and died a hero."

9. Lord of the Rings, Samwise Gamgee: Lord of the Garden. Come on, I think anyone would like a friend like Sam. Initially a bit of a comic relief, it turns out he has more guts than most men and is willing to throw down with opponents far out of his league. And in the case of Shelob: winning. He gives some of the best dialogue and ultimately manages to carry Frodo up the side of Mt. Doom and thus help thwart one of media's greatest villains just by being a stalwart friend. A paragon for the simple folk.

10. DC Comics, Clark Kent/Superman: There's a reason why he's considered to be one of the greatest superheroes ever. Despite being given great power, he's a farm boy at heart and loves helping people instead of lording it over others. He's smarter than he looks, and ultimately is the friend everyone wished they had. Time again he's challenged by changing morals and an ever cynical world, and time and again, he proves why the world needs a Superman.

@mousegard, @crunchy-multi-fan-one-9, @prodogg, @prying-pandora666, @azulas-daddy-kink

10 characters | 10 fandoms | 10 a negotiable number of tags

Tagged by @zukoisblorbo 💜

1. Sokka: atla - I love a silly guy who would wear Crocs and make dumb jokes/puns and complain all the time.

2. Mizu: Blue Eye Samurai - 😍😍😍

3. Bob Belcher: Bob's Burgers - there might be a theme to this and it's bisexual disasters

4. Marceline the Vampire Queen: Adventure Time - goodness I love her songs and her story line and ah

5. Korra: tlok - this counts as a separate fandom right? Korra has reminded me that healing isn't linear

6. Inosuke Hashibira: Demon Slayer - I just love idiots

7. Howl: Howl's Moving Castle - again, I love bisexual dumbasses

8. Hestu: Legend of Zelda - he just makes me so happy

9. Cherry: Sk8te the Infinity - I also want to be a grumpy man with long pink hair

10. Hua Cheng: Heaven's Official Blessing - (⁠๑⁠♡⁠⌓⁠♡⁠๑⁠) pls

I'm gonna tag @naberriesamidala @unacaritafeliz @zukkaturtleduck @transboyzuko @xieliansbignaturals

[hurtyknees]

I think Josh Sauchak is one of my favorite examples of Explicitly Autistic Characters In Media.

Obviously, he's not a *perfect* example, because at the end of the day there are still cliches he falls into (being white, cis, pretty young, etc etc etc) but IMHO he's not insufferable, or an offensive caricature (like Sheldon - even tho they have a lot of basic similarities- or Sia's Music ™).

All that being said, here are things i appreciate in the way Josh's character was made:

1. He's an actual adult.

A lot of people who are much smarter than me talked about how shitty it is to infantilize neurodivergent people. And they're right; it annoys me to no end when people who are close to The Autistic Character™ treat them like a child, with no agency of their own. WD2 doesn't do that!

(some could argue that Sitara does it. I'd disagree; It goes with how her character is set up - she cares deeply about her friends, and goes out of her way to make sure they're okay. She's protective. Not just towards Josh, but Marcus, the Unnamed Friend from the Moscow Gambit mission, off the top of my head.)

There's only one person i can think of who explicitly infantilized Josh and treated him less like a person, and more like a pet. And that's Lenny. Y'know, someone who game tried very hard to let us know we're NOT SUPPOSED TO LIKE.

and - SPOILER - it did bite her in the ass at the end, didn't it?

2. He's a full, well rounded character.

I'll try to keep it short and sweet- the difference between Josh and Sheldon - the unholy staple of autistic characters - is that Josh doesn't feel flat. At least to me.

He does admit in one of the side missions that autism does have a huge impact on his personality. Now i couldn't find an exact quote, but after Marcus asks him whether or not he'd take part in the "experiments" being held that could supposedly "cure autism", Josh's answer is something along the lines of "only if I could go back from that. I like who i am, and i don't know if I'd like myself without it (the autism)".

Side note- it's genuinely so uplifting to see an autistic character and people around them not treating neurodivergency like some fucking curse. It happens way too often.

But yeah, going back to the point- Josh has a full, fleshed out personality. He's passionate, self aware, can be absolutely hilarious, and doesn't let other people walk over him. But he also holds himself to very high standards, and can be really harsh on himself if he doesn't meet them.

3. How he's treated by others.

I touched on that briefly before, but i simply love every interaction Josh has with others.

They treat him so normally, that in media where neurodivergent people are more often than not treated like aliens this felt extremely refreshing.

Dedsec members don't baby him as mentioned above, but they also don't get mad when he doesn't understand something, or - in his head - fucks something up.

(And honestly, that applies to everyone in Dedsec. I was so scared that the writers are gonna go for the lowest hanging fruit- do something that will make the group temporarily fall apart. But they didn't. Not when Marcus had his big fuckup at !nvite, not when Ray showed up. They stuck together. And didn't dwell on each other's mistakes.)

TLDR; it fascinates me to no end how media that treat themselves so insanely seriously fail at being inclusive, but Watch Dogs 2 - the game that took a giant U-turn from being that, after seeing how first game was received - has had some of the most genuine, heartfelt, casual representation I've seen in a long time.

Again, it's not perfect. But it's honest and down to earth. It didn't treat marginalized communities it included instrumentally.

I just love this game so much.

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

Don't Worry Darling: Baby Review/Theories!

I have so many thoughts after the pre-screening. THIS MIGHT HAVE DWD SPOILERS (barely) BUT I’M SEEING TOO MANY MISINTERPRETATIONS OF THE CONCEPTS AND WANT TO ADDRESS IT SO…

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Review/Plot & PR Theories...

Olivia Wilde talks about “female pleasure” being at the forefront of this film. And because of the trailer and snippets we got I think we all took that as a statement of female pleasure sexually. And again, the marketing eluded to this as well. But I genuinely think that was all intentional and we all ran with it.

When Florence then shared that people were just focusing on Harry eating 🐱 I don't think it was a dig at Olivia, but more of a statement that we were focusing on the wrong thing as an audience (and maybe even as a fandom).

I think the concept and perception of female pleasure was certainly at the forefront of the film as was promised. It's about what we as females are groomed to believe our pleasure should be. Not just sexually, but the pleasures of life we are encouraged to believe we deserve. Deserving is very key to the film (as you may have seen or will see). The idea of men being the providers and keeping us safe, taking care of us, being obsessed and in love with us, doing the most for us. Making women feel that men being in control is an act of kindness & chivalry. This film sheds a light on how society expects women to accept & applaud benevolent sexism as men doing “the most” to please women.

At the beginning I said that it was intentional for the statement of "female pleasure" to be misconstrued as just being about sexual pleasure. And just the reactions people are having to the statement after watching the film proves that point. Yes, there was female focused sexual pleasure, but because that's what needed to happen in the story to keep Alice "happy", or so that's what Jack thinks is a key part of Alice's happiness. And Olivia making that statement and everyone thinking that she was just talking about sex just proves how much we (even women) are trained to accept something as basic as sexual pleasure to be what encapsulates what female pleasure actually means. And then we get this whole view of what is actually happening (in the film) and it is upsetting to think back on that statement made by a woman and then think that our pleasure can be watered down to just that. I'm telling you, this was intentional, and I think she's way smarter than people give her credit for.

I do wish there was more of a backstory as to how our MC's fell into their situation. But the montage of clips re: Alice & Jack's backstory are certainly enough to clue you in as to how they ended up where they did. The film can't address everything (though I would've watched a 4hour film if it had been that because it was just so beautiful) and the plot was certainly more watered down than the original script (this is an adaption by Katie Silberman), but I think it did it's job in getting you to think about the reality we are in and just how much we might still be controlled or influenced by a male-serving society.

Also, it touches on the dangers of toxic masculinity and really gets you thinking about incel culture and gender roles/expectation. I think the point was to bring awareness and not to give answers or address it. Just to pique one's interest enough to investigate for ourselves and understand that things like that exist! Obvs not to the extent of the film, but that people out there think this way and that the opportunity would be seized by some if it were given. In light of that, this film is certainly about female power and claiming back their lives! And the cherry on top is that the ending was perfect. Just giving you that glimpse of hope that what comes next for Alice is only up to Alice to decide. Not even the audience is privy to the next steps.

It was super well done and twisted and I can't wait to see what else Olivia and Katie can produce if they continue working together.

HARR'YS ACTING...

people are still saying he was awkward, seems uncomfortable to be there, is trying too hard and YES, he was but that's exactly how it's supposed to come across. In my opinion he understood the assignment 100%. After seeing the full film it's clear that Jack really is trying to believe and convince himself that what he is doing isn't wrong. He's acting his ass off to Alice & himself, not to the audience. He is trying to be the absolute best and do the absolute most before it all goes to shit. Because really, it is just a matter of time before something goes wrong and he knows that.

I think that Harry replacing Shia was practically a blessing in disguise. I think Shia is an incredible actor, but he would have been far too convincing from the start and would have lacked that naiveté that Harry brought to the role of Jack. Because, really from the get go you know that something is wrong and I think that's the point?

Like the era the film is set in is one that we often associate with optimism and ease, but even just historically we know that this isn't the fact - so I think it's important that from the beginning you understood that just because it looks good, it doesn't mean that it is good. In a sense, it's about trusting your gut; when something feels off, it often is. And honestly, that's all female hysteria is about! Being gaslit into believing that your gut is wrong! And everyone in Victory is there to make life so easy for the women that they don't need to be concerned for anything or even to think. And again, I think it's supposed to be quick and obvious that something is off about Victory.

THE PLANE...

I think this was Alice's first "hallucination" or sign of her waking up. The plane crash wasn't real - she didn't see any debris when she got to HQ, remember. Also, it can't be real unless it was something that was done on purpose in the simulation, which wasn't the vibe I was getting from it. I believe that scene happens after Bunny, Peg, & Alice experience that earthquake together and have talked about what happened to Margaret and her son, also they were neighbors and she'd seen Margaret with the red toy plane. So obviously, that stuck in Alice's mind and I saw it as her subconscious trying to clue to her that something was wrong beyond Victory. I think the plane is just an omen/metaphor that represents this "perfect world" they're in and how it's all about to come crashing down. Red is a color associated with warnings and danger, which is also why I think it isn't any other color and it stands out so much in comparison to all of the other colors used in the palette in the film. I'm of the belief that directors deliberately use symbols and objects like that as an element of foreshadowing in films, so in my opinion the plane was a lot more meaningful symbolically than literally.

SHELLEY (Gemma Chan)...

I didn't read too much into Shelley & Frank when I saw the film. But from what I saw in the film she clearly was in on the whole thing! She knows it's a simulation and how it works. This is proved by her killing Frank, like Bunny explained to Alice, if he dies in Victory, he dies in real life and homegirl knew that! She certainly was complacent in the idea of what he was doing because she was training the women to be more submissive and organized and then when she kills him she says "you stupid boy" or something like that, like he had gotten too arrogant and fucked it up. So maybe it was her intention to continue running the sim but better? Or maybe she was just acting that way to survive and took her chance to get rid of him and get out when it came? Maybe I'll rewatch it again and pay more attention to their dynamic because I really was just focused on Alice x Jack & Bunny x Dean. I also say Bunny & Dean because from the beginning I was suspish about Bunny & Dean!

THE LULLABY...

I found it very interesting how everything that triggered Alice's "awakening" was that song Jack sang to Alice. As we saw, he'd sing it to her while she was in the sim and that was planting her subconscious to reality. Jack didn't even know it, but he was bleeding the two worlds together and ultimately he was the reason she was able to go free as he also taught her how to drive (they said at the start that none of the other wives knew how). I made that connection because in Stranger Things this season they referred to same psychological phenomenon to tie victims in to their reality and escape Vecna.

I think during the whole film Jack was acting weird because he knows that what he's doing is fucked up and I think he does want to be honest with her and have her accept to be in the sim with him. He clearly loved Alice, but he was so insecure and twisted. But in a way, it's like he was kind of hoping she'd figure it out and I think he thought that like Bunny & Dean, they could be that couple that were both on board with it and made that alternate universe their ultimate happy ending.

THE EGGS!

I just realized that the eggs are empty because she’s not really eating. This was another little “wake up call” moment while she was in the sim! Like they’re not actually eating. Their brain thinks they are eating real food - that’s why Jack is like “no tuna for me, thanks!” - because it still feels like they’re eating BUT ITS NOT REAL FOOD!

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

I literally LIVE for the shanks crew senarios, can you maybe- if you have time- do a shanks married to the reader one? Idk if i made sense sorry ajehdnwkhd

I know you said scenario, but I'm giving you head cannons and mini-scenarios. Mostly because I have a shanks husband scenario coming down the pipe.

Imagine having shanks as your husband

Sfw

Shanks is the most doting husband there is, like he is 100% a golden retriever himbo

He will spend all of his free time with you, usually doing something you both enjoy.

Shanks is the type of his and who will go shopping with you, suggest you try on clothes he's picked out, he'll happily carry around your bags and cheer you on when you show him an outfit.

He'll give you the best things he can afford, which varies from a day at the beach eating foraged and hunted food to dinning at the nicest restaurant and going to the one piece equivalent of Broadway is, followed by a trip to a jewelers and a night at the nicest hotel.

One the red force he's made sure everyone knows you are on equal standing as he is.

His crew loves you, and act like a pack of overprotective big brothers.

Benn has plans to whoop Shanks's ass if he ever breaks your heart

You will spend most evenings in Shanks's lap, no he won't let you sit anywhere else

Loves when you add things around the ship like pillows to the couches, coffee tables, side tables in the halls, soft lighting, and scented candles. He thinks it makes red force feel a little less like a ship and more like a home

Shanks genuinely thinks you're smarter than him, so he values your opinion very highly.

Will loose his shit if anything happens to you

You have a sniffle, he calls the doctor

You were hurt in battle, who ever hurt you is dead and thrown overboard before you can even blink

Shanks is big on romantic gestures, but he's not really aware that he's doing them.

He sees something that reminds him of you, he will buy (or steal) it and give it to you.

When he's drunk he turns into a clingy puppy dog, he will babble about how much he loves you and list off his favorite things about you.

Lives staying sober when you're drunk so he can take care of you, and because he encourages you to climb into his lap and will beg you for smooches.

Will get a little fat on him if you're a cook, because he loves your cooking and will eat two to three servings for food

Shanks is only ticklish for you

Shanks will subtlety keep you by his side, preference on the side with his arm because he feels you are safest tucked up against his side under his arm

Has you sharing a cabin with him, because he likes waking up with you in his arms.

Will share the food off his plate with you and will even give you the lion's share of your favorite dishes even if it's also his favorite.

Naps, you are his favorite nap spot.

If the crew is having to rough it in the wilderness, Shanks insists you sleep on top of him, after all he is more comfortable than the ground

Nsfw

He's going to fuck you absolutely everywhere on the red force

Benn: *walks into the mess hall*

Shanks: *has you pressed ass up on the table and is fucking you senseless*

You: *too blissed out from Shanks making you bounce on his cock with every thrust to even notice Benn arrive*

Benn: oh god why, we eat off of that!

Doesn't like receiving oral unless you are 69ing because he likes giving you pleasure as well.

Will however buy you long poofy dresses so he can hide under your skirt and eat you out to his hearts content.

Loves when you squish his head between your thighs or better yet you sit on his face.

No, Shanks does not have a weight limit to ride his face, he would happily die being suffocated between your thighs.

Shanks is a strong man he can and will pick you up and fuck you against the wall.

Will use sex with you as his cardio workouts. So expect to receive his full attention and effort every single time.

Loves when you call him Captain during sex.

Shanks is a tits, ass, and thigh man. He sees no reason to pick one they're all great

He also loves all body types

He's mostly attracted to the person not the body

So it doesn't matter if you're not human or what gender or sex you are. If he has feelings for you he'll fuck you

Shanks has piercings

He has his nipples pierced and his dick pierced

Will spit roast you with Benn

Has, in fact, fucked you in Mariejois

His favorite position for you is doggy style (with you preferably bent of something) and a mating press.

Shanks has a breeding kink, but no desire to actually sire a child. So he got a vasectomy when he was in his early 20s because he loves pumping his load into you, but doesn't want to worry about the repercussions.

Shanks is a top, but the one arm makes the positions he can comfortably do rather limited

Shanks is a pleasure Dom, and no he won't be satisfied with a session if he hasn't rung more than thirty orgasms out of you. And yes he will count each one. And if loses count, he will start all over again.

King of aftercare

He'll draw you both a hot bath, bring you drinks and snacks, massage your aching muscles, and wash you down, getting a few more orgasms out of you in the process.

Quickies don't really do it for him, just one orgasm for him is kind of boring. But will have them if he doesn't have time for a full session, or if you need him.

He will also fuck you out in the open where the crew, the public, and the gods to see.

While the crew can watch, the only one that's allowed to touch you besides him, is Benn.

Shank'll leave you in Benn's care if he needs to go off ship and it's too dangerous for you to come with.

Finds it amusing that you're more of a brat for Benn since you figured out he enjoys brat taming.

If you are a brat with shanks though he will break you. Your punishment will be fifty orgasms. No amount of apologizing will get you out of it. Although your safe word will get him to stop.

Shanks will make you squirt, doesn't matter if you don't think you can do it, he will have you squirting with in the first session.

[tenebraevesper]

Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer, Issue #46: Trial by Fire (Part 2)

I believe that Cover RI is the most appropriate for this Issue, as it’s absolutely frightening, not only because there is a blaze raging around Belle, but also because she’s basically a wooden puppet. This is terrifying for her.

As for the Issue itself, we’re finally going to find out who set the forest on fire.

We start off with Belle waking up to the sight of everything around her burning to ashes while two figures are standing in front of her.

You know, I could just pretend I have no idea who those two are, since it is supposed to be a mystery, but let’s be honest, this isn’t a spoiler anymore.

While it is not an official introduction yet, I will welcome two new characters here - Surge and Kit, who will become incredibly important later on. Also, this basically confirms that Belle nor that kid with the Wisp were the ones who set the forest on fire, but Surge and Kit did. As for their backstory, we’ll dive into that later.

Belle is stunned, and we see her glove breaking apart, her hand being on fire. Fortunately for Belle, the Motobug from earlier spots her, throwing some mud on her hand to extinguish the fire. Honestly, this Badnik is genuinely cute. I mean, just look at him, he’s so proud for saving Belle.

Belle is stunned to see that the Motobug not only saved her hand, but also saved her by dragging her away from the fire. She then remembers the lighter in her hand, afraid that she may have been the one who started it, only to hear someone call for her.

It is Tangle, who was on the search for the ranger’s son. She’s immediately alerted by the presence of the Badnik, but Belle convinces her that the Motobug may have some wires crossed and saved her, with Tangle being fine with him around. 

She then sees Belle’s hand, with Belle replying how it doesn’t hurt. Since she’s a robot, I guess Belle doesn’t have any pain receptors, so she can keep going even if she’s completely maimed. Tangle still helps her by wrapping sports tape around it and when Belle attempts to tell her that she may have started the fire, Tangle interrupts her as they still need to find that kid.

Honestly, while it seemed a bit rude for Tangle to interrupt Belle like this, I think it was for the better. They’re in a hurry, the forest is on fire and it would be smarter for Belle to keep quiet until she can get full confirmation to what had happened.

Meanwhile, back at the campground, Amy and Jewel are talking to the ranger, while people around them are still running around, trying to get away. The ranger explains how the campground is overcrowded and the road isn’t meant for heavy traffic, so there will be a stampede if they let everyone leave. With the wind blowing the fire towards them, they don’t have much time left. Amy asks Jewel for any ideas, with Jewel replying how they need to coordinate, but everyone’s so angry.

We then see an older guy arguing with the ranger, yelling at him to open the gates as everyone’s in danger. The ranger tries to calm him down, saying how he also has a kid out there, with the guy noting how it’s the kid with the red Wisp, and the people around him starting to talk how the boy and the Wisp may have started the fire. Amy and Jewel just stare at everyone as they argue, Amy being clearly frustrated as she leads Jewel on top of the rock in the middle of the campground.

What follows is a really epic shot of Amy summoning her hammer and then splitting the huge boulder apart! Like, look at that! That is awesome! Hell, Amy is awesome!

She then tells everyone basically to shut up and listen to her. Yes, they have every right to be scared out of their minds and want to protect their families, but there is a good reason for the gate to be closed, because if everyone tries to leave, they’ll be stuck.

The guy then asks her whether she has a plan to stop the fire, but Amy replies how she’s more of the type leading the charge than figuring out logistics and points at a rather shocked Jewel, asking her for a plan.

Jewel dejectedly tells her that she can’t, with the guy yelling at them, only for Amy to shut him up immediately as she brandishes her hammer. God, I love Amy when she gets riled up and starts beating on the people who are being annoying.

Amy then asks Jewel what’s wrong, and Jewel explains how the only thing she’s good with is paperwork and rocks, so what gives her the right to tell those people what to do? She did nothing but stumble through the Metal Virus, the Eggman attack and the Zeti, adding how the Restoration can’t even keep their own people safe and that she can’t even handle whatever Tangle is going through (one word for the latter, Jewel: communication!).

But, yeah, when you think back to those events, Jewel became a Zombot after getting accidentally affected. When the Zeti attacked, she was hiding in the main control room with Tangle and Whisper, and even then, only the latter two fought back. As for the Eggman attack, we had that moment where Jewel replied to Whisper that she wasn’t a leader and Vector taking charge.

Honestly, this is actually a very big moment for Jewel. The stuff that happened really affected her self-confidence, and it is clear that she isn’t a fighter like Amy or Tangle. However, she still has her own strengths, and Amy reminds her that she’s still doing her best and that she just needs to have some faith, showing her the tarot card again.

Jewel takes it and quickly takes charge of everything, with Amy giving her the most proud look she can manage. It’s adorable.

So, the plan - first, they’re getting the elderly and children to safety. This is followed by the next step of protecting themselves and the forest. They’re going to create a perimeter to contain the fire by digging out trenches, and while Jewel cannot promise everything will go perfectly, they still have a chance if they work together.

Checking back with Tangle, Belle and Motobug, Tangle has some trouble breathing... and I swear we had a similar event with Shard, Silver and Larry in Sonic Universe.

Admittedly, Shard’s comment was much funnier and the situation wasn’t as dire as with Tangle dealing with smoke inhalation.

Anyways, Belle points out where might be less smoke and they find a chasm, spotting Ashe and his Wisp across it. They attempt to get down from the cliff they’re standing on, only to slip, with Tangle coughing violently due to the smoke.

Fortunately, Motobug manages to catch them and as they drive to the edge of the cliff, Belle tells Tangle to grab her tail and pull it at the right moment.

They reach the edge and on Belle’s mark, Tangle pulls the tail, causing Belle to kick them off across the chasm. However, they start falling and Belle fears they won’t make it, but fortunately, Tangle grabs a rock and pulls them onto safety. They all land on the ground, safe and sound.

Belle turns to Ashe, introducing herself, but the poor kid is too scared since he basically is dealing with two Badniks here and doesn’t want to fight. Belle gets serious and tells him that there’s something important he needs to know... and then honks her nose, cheering the latter up and asking him to remember that. Honestly, this is genuinely adorable and I think that Belle would know how to work with children since she and Mr. Tinker had been working on those rides for the kids.

As for Tangle, she is completely enamored by Belle’s clown nose and I’m laughing over here, wondering what is better - Tangle’s wide-eyed expression or Belle’s deadpan look. Belle also adds how, if she tells everyone what she saw, she will disassemble Tangle’s bicycle and hide the parts. Honestly, I love seeing these two interact.

As for Ashe, he tells Belle that he didn’t start the fire, but he did see Surge and Kit doing it. Belle is relieved that it wasn’t her, while Tangle is puzzled over Surge’s ability to manipulate lightning. Belle replies how she saw them too and Ashe is glad they believe them.

The group then leaves, following the river downstream, but a burning tree falls off and crashes into the cliff, causing everyone to fall off, safe for Motobug.

As Motobug looks up, he sees the tip of Tangle’s tail. Fortunately, Tangle has saved everyone, with Belle holding onto Ashe. Unfortunately for them, the tree trunk breaks off and the cliff crumbles, hitting Motobug and causing Tangle to lose her grip.

The last we see of them is everyone falling down the chasm.

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[sturkillerbase]

It's All Coming Back to Me in Waves

PART V

Summary: Din is touch starved, and there's nothing in the galaxy he wants more than to feel your skin on his. The same applies to you, although none of you could bring yourselves to admit it. And, like you, he'd also like for you to see him. He finds a solution; not entirely what you want, but enough to calm your troubled minds. Or perhaps... it only stirred things more...

Genre: fluff, slow burn - "SO incredibly fluffy you might implode", in the words of the lovely @misspearlssideblog

Song rec: 252, by Gem Club

Warnings: none

Words: 2.5k

A/N: Had to look at a bunch of young Pedro pictures for this one. Absolutely not a complaint.

Intro; Part IV; Part VI

I wish you could see me/I can see you

Present time

Din and Grogu had been with you for a couple weeks now, and every single day you could swear you hadn’t ever been so happy in your life than you were now. Grogu was absolutely adorable, and way smarter than he seemed. “Don’t let his cute face fool you.” Din had warned, and he was right. Every now and then the baby would do something that would have you speechless. But what you couldn’t figure out was how the fruits on your counter kept disappearing. Din told you Grogu had a tendency to steal food when no one was looking, but it still wasn’t clear to you how he could get on top of the counter since he was way too little for that. When Din told you the truth about Grogu, you widened your eyes at him and immediately exclaimed:

“What, like a jedi?? Like Luke Skywalker?!?”

“You know Luke Skywalker?” Din was genuinely surprised.

“Din, everyone’s heard of Luke Skywalker. He literally saved the galaxy, to make it short. He was still around when you and I were flying together back then. I don’t know where he is now though.”

“Oh…” was his only answer.

“You didn’t know him?!”

“No. But… I kind of met him.”

“You met the jedi Luke Skywalker?!?” You nearly yelled, almost not believing in what Din was saying. Perhaps if it had been someone else, you wouldn’t have believed. You grabbed his wrist and pulled him to sit down with you and tell you the whole part of the crazy story that he had so casually not deemed too important to share.

After you learned everything about Grogu, you swore to give your life to protect him from whatever dangers came his way. You were no warrior, nor did you know how to fight properly. But you had heavy tools all over your house and your work shed, and you were absolutely not afraid to use them.

Right now, though, you were helping Din fold his (previously very dirty) laundry. He didn’t have much; most of it had been blown up with the Crest, but you had finally convinced him to buy new clothes for him and Grogu, and now you were taking care of his old ones.

Din could fold them nicely, but he couldn’t use an iron to save his life, so you offered to do that before he’d somehow burn another shirt. And also the fingers he hadn’t burned yet.

As he folded his jumpsuit, a small giggle from you made him look up, at first thinking he was doing something wrong again. But you were actually looking at his cape that you had just finished ironing.

“It’s in a miserable state. I know.” He admitted.

“No, it’s not that. I mean, yes, it is in a miserable state. But I was thinking about the fact that you still have it.” You told him, turning off the iron now that you were done with it. “When you first arrived a few days ago, I noticed that it was the same one that I gave you. But part of me wasn’t so sure, especially because it’s been so long. Now that I’m seeing it up close, I can tell it really is the same cape.” You grinned.

Din blushed a little under the helmet. The cape was in such a poor state he didn’t think you would notice it was still the one you’d given to him; the ends were jagged, the deep color had faded, some bits were torn and others were stretched. Not to mention a patch that had burned off from one of the times he’d used his back jet.

“I couldn’t bring myself to part with it.” He admitted in a low voice, not looking at you, finishing to fold his jumpsuit.

You smiled either way; you knew exactly what he meant. You also still had something he’d given to you a long time ago.

“I have something, too” you said as you rushed up the stairs.

After grabbing it from your nightstand’s drawer, you head back downstairs and walk up to him, holding what seems to be a simple piece of cloth.

“Couldn’t bring myself to part with it either” you confess, holding the little cloth up in your hands for him.

“No way!” He said in contained surprise, picking the piece up from your hands.

It was a sleep mask he had given you around a year after you’d given him his cape. It used to be black, but it was a grey-ish shade now. The hem around the eye area was worn out and had a small tear in it; the band had come undone and was stitched back in place on one side; and the elastic band had a knot on the back, having lost its elasticity a long time ago. He giggled at the state of the mask; it was a perfect match for his destroyed cape.

He hadn’t bought the mask for you so you could sleep better in a darker ambient – that would be a plus. In fact, he had quite the opposite use for it: he wanted you to be able to see him. His Mandalorian vows kept him from showing his face to you or anyone else, but nothing had ever been said about touching his face. And, Maker, was he touch starved.

That was then. Now, he had ten years of starvation built up in him, and the feeling was becoming almost unbearable. Every time your hands brushed; every warmth coming from you when you’d stand too close; every night when he laid on your bed, resting his head on your pillows and covering himself with your sheets; every time he watched you fix whatever it was in your workshop, skin glistening with sweat, the muscles of your arms flexing as you skillfully fixed something back in place; whenever Grogu made you laugh; all the times you’d smile up at him. He felt like taking off his helmet and showering your face and neck with kisses, only to then kiss your lips that seemed to be the only thing capable of putting down his fire.

But he couldn’t.

Or rather,

He was unsure.

After pondering for a while as he watched the sleep mask on his hands, he takes an encouraging breath and carefully slides the mask through your head and over your eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

11 years ago

You had just arrived home from an afternoon of grocery shopping. Din had his full armor on, as he always did whenever he left your house to somewhere else. Whenever he was around and it was time for shopping, he’d obviously come along, helping to carry the bags on the way back, especially the heavier ones. It was a simple thing, an everyday life task. But it was cute to you, like everything else he did. Well, except fighting and killing. That was… hot. But apart from cute, it was also quite funny: it looked like you had your own madly skilled body guard to watch over you as you bought rice.

Right now, you were in the kitchen, taking the groceries off the bags so you could store them away.

“I, um, bought you something.” He said.

“Oh?” You turned to him.

You did notice when he had suddenly vanished from your side at the market street, only to just as suddenly show back up, making you jump a little when he spoke to you from behind as you picked the best plums. He was incredibly silent for someone his size wearing literal metal clothes.

“Here.” He handed you a folded black piece of fabric. “They didn’t have gift wraps, so, um… yeah.”

“Don’t bother with that.” You reassured him and proceeded to unfold the rather thick fabric; it was a sleep mask. “Oh, this is nice” you ran your fingers through it, feeling how soft it was. “Thank you, Din!” you smiled up at him.

“I- I was thinking, um—” he cleared his throat. “I had this idea—” he was suddenly nervous, and you couldn’t tell why. “Can I?” he pointed at the sleep mask on your hands.

“Uh- yeah. Sure.” You handed it to him, a little confused. He picked it up.

“Here. Excuse me…” he said as he slided the mask over your head, fixing it in place while being careful with your eyes and hair. “There we go.”

“Ooh, pitch black.” You said and waited to see what his next move would be.

You heard something being placed on the countertop followed by a very soft shuffling. Unexpectedly, you felt his bare hands on your wrists, lifting your hands up to around your chest level, softly, and stopping there.

“We’ve—we’ve known each other for about a year and a half now. And I know you very well. The way you look, that is.” You could hear the nervousness in his voice, and you were starting to get anxious too, uncertain of what was going on exactly. But you let him keep talking. “You… Don’t know me. Only bits of me: my hands, my arms. And my ribs, too, from patching them way too many times.” You two shared a soft laugh at that. “What I thought of when I saw that mask, um. Well, you can’t see me. With your eyes. But perhaps you could know me… through your touch. If—if you’d like to, of course…” His voice got lower and lower as he spoke, ending with an unsure, but hopeful whisper.

Nothing had ever been said in his creed about this. The rule was that a Mandalorian could never show his face to a living being, therefore proving their devotion. But touching, feeling… It wasn’t the same as showing, was it? He was unsure, but found logic in his thoughts.

You were surprised, heart rate going faster. Did he really mean what you thought he meant? Yes. Yes, he did. Oh, boy! What now? You wanted it. If that’s what you could have from him, then yes, you wanted all of it. But the same thoughts that occupied Din’s mind filled yours: could you really do it? Was this right? You weren’t seeing his face, but would he end up being kicked out of his creed if anyone ever found out about this? As much as you craved for it, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it, hands frozen in place as he held then. You couldn’t form a word either, so you just nodded leisurely.

That was enough for him. You heard a faint relieved sigh, and, slowly, he lifted your hands towards his face. When your fingertips touched his cheeks, he let go of your wrists, so you could feel his face at your own pace and will.

You touched him lightly at first, like he could brake and fall away from your touch if you weren’t careful enough.

You touched his cheekbones first, tracing them, and he watched in silence as you focused your whole attention to the skin of your hands. You noticed how sharp his cheekbones were, and as you lowered your hands to his jawline, you let your fingers finally press properly into his skin, without hurting or being too rough.

You ran your fingers along his jaw, making your way to his chin, building the image of a strong, square shaped face in your mind, his beard barely there, probably shaved this morning. With your thumbs, you traced the curves of his lips, not too thin and not too full, a curved, deep lip bow. You raised your hands to his forehead, and he closed his eyes to focus on your touch, holding his hands firmly on his sides as to not give in and pull you closer. You could feel very fine, barely there lines on his forehead and between his eyebrows; he probably did furrow his brows a lot, as you had imagined. Your fingers traced his thick eyebrows, and, with care, you lowered them to his eyes, feeling just slightly as to not end up hurting him. His eyes were deep set, and his lashes not too long. At last, you traced your index finger down the bridge of his nose. It was tall and curved, a contrast to the sharper features of his face, but just as strong. Finally, you ran your fingers through his hair. It was thin, a bit wavy, not too long, and incredibly soft. So, so soft. You could run your hands through the strands and curl each lock around your fingers for hours.

It all fit him. He was strong, gentle, firm when he needed to be, and soft as he opened up to you. And so were his physical features. Everything matched.

“What’s your hair color?” you whispered, not knowing if you were allowed to ask that or not. You already knew his skin color, and you loved every time you got to see it. And now that you had the chance to build a better image of him in your brain, you couldn’t just let it pass.

“Black.” he whispered back, finally opening his eyes to look at you again, enjoying the feeling of your hands cradling his face.

“And what’s your eye color?”

“Deep brown.” He answered, wishing that he could look at your shiny eyes without the helmet on.

“Any beauty marks?” you wondered.

“Just a small one” he said, taking your right hand and lowering it to the left side on his neck “around here.” You felt the small vibrations on his neck as he spoke.

“You’re beautiful” you finally said, in awe and still whispering. But your compliment was met with a small scoff.

“You can’t really see me to know.” He spoke.

“I don’t need to. Never did.” It was true. He was beautiful to you, no matter what he looked like. But now that you got the chance to see him through your touch, you were more sure than ever.

You spent a few more seconds like that; him watching you, taking in your real colors and every little detail, nothing the visor of his helmet could ever reproduce, big hands over yours. And you, with your hands still on him, the left one ever so slightly caressing the back of his neck, feeling his hot skin against yours, and replaying the memory of your touch on him, picturing him.

At last, he lowered your hands from him, cradled your face, and placed a warm, lasting kiss to your forehead, catching you by surprise.

He smiles at your little reaction to him, but you don’t see it.

You hear metal brush against the surface of the counter, and soon after he reaches for the sleep mask on you, taking it off. You blink a few times, adjusting to the light, and look up at him, helmet back on.

He hands you back the mask, and when he takes his hands away from it, he lifts one of them to your chin, pressing it slightly to close your agape mouth. You hadn’t realized your lips were parted until he did so.

He lets out a small snort and turns around, going back to taking the groceries off the bags.

You turn too, tucking the sleep mask on your pocket and gathering a few items to put away, trying to get yourself back together.

The room is silent, but whatever is swirling all over in your bodies and minds is turbulent and deafening.

If you got this far into my fanfic, please let me know! ☺😊

Taglist:

@scorpio-marionette

@supernaturalgirl20

@misspearlssideblog

@becksxoxo

@eylaudie

@janebby

[all-about-seggs]

Sultry Blues-

Rating: ❌18+, Explicit❌

Pairing : Gojo Satoru x Insecure! Fem Reader

Word count: 2.5 k

Warnings: Trigger warning for insecurities (not specified), Body Worshipping, a bit of food play, cunnilingus, Semi-public sex.

The faint sounds of ringing bells from the shrine was still in the air as you made your way to the inner structure of the prestigious Jujutsu academy. The path to the meeting room was straight and lined with stone carvings which gave the entire place an ancient look. You had a lunchtime date with your boyfriend, who would, hopefully be on time so you could be on your way.

This place always made you uneasy, not because of the dangerous connotations it brought in everyone’s lives but it was the people who freaked you out the most. To you, each one of the teachers as well as the students looked like some characters straight from a book, elegant, strong and perfectly capable of doing things normal people like you could only read about. Not having enough confidence on yourself physically or mentally worsened every time it dawned on you that you were dating the most perfect being of them all.

Perplexing wouldn’t even began to describe your state of mind when Satoru first took interest in you, sure looks or status didn’t meant anything to him but even in terms of personality you never thought the two of you would get along, so much so that you would become such an irreplaceable part of each other. But you knew his feelings for you did nothing to stop the ache in your heart when you saw him getting ganged up on by a bunch of women. Women attractive than you, smarter than you and definitely stronger than you.

This was exactly the place where all those kind of women lived making you feel even more of an outsider in his world. Not wanting to cause Satoru any worries you tried to psyche yourself up by picking up your pace only to be met with a hard shoulder to your cheek.

“I’m sorry! I wasn’t looking”, you looked up at the stranger, she was tall, her sturdy figure seemed like she was also a sorcerer but her ID pass was tucked on the breast pocket of her coat along with her youthful face indicated she was a student, you squinted to see that her name was Lisa and as you were about to apologise when you saw her sneer at you.

“ Ugh… outsiders. Don’t you know how to walk properly? Or did you not learn that in your no name school?”, her condescending tone took you aback.

You knew you didn’t exactly belong here but she wasn’t cutting you any slack for being a civilian either. You wanted to ask her why was she being so rude but your queries were cut off as by the girl.

“ No need to explain yourself I already know who you are, I’ve seen you following Gojo- San like a lost puppy a lot of times, seriously it’s like you don’t even have a presence without him.”, with a pause you finally thought her pointless berating would come to a stop but she went on.

“ He has a reputation to uphold here so don’t go around embarrassing him with your airheaded and average looking face”, now with THAT she crossed the line but as much as you wanted to give her a comeback all you anger turned into self loathing in a matter of seconds and you stood there dumbly not being able to defend yourself from the onslaught of verbal attacks that even you partially agreed with.

Not even bothering to look at her when she passed you thought about her mean words that were half untrue. You knew dating a popular guy would include more that just a little bit harmless envy of girls. At this point you’d be lucky if you didn’t get attacked by one of your boyfriend’s fangirl. But, It wasn’t about Satoru anymore, you thought. It was about how you were letting the jealousy of his superficial admirers who didn’t even knew only knew his name and face. Before you could delve more into your darkening thoughts you heard a cheery voice call out to you.

Bag at hand, which probably contained some sort of dessert you saw Satoru gleefully making his way towards you. It took you a few seconds to plaster a believable smile to your face so you could greet him normally.

“ Wow I can’t believe IM the one who had to wait around this time”, placing a tiny kiss on your nose he pulled you in for a hug, his warmth seeping into you put your mind at ease and help you distract yourself from the horrible encounter before.

“ The meeting was pointless and even the snacks turned out to be lame”, whining a little he waved the bag in front of you. A convenient store vanilla sponge cake with a packet of strawberry sauce was right in front of you and honestly if it were you, you’d probably eat it without question but knowing his love for quality sweets it was understandable why he’d complain.

“ Well actually, with the right toppings and modifications even convenient store packed cakes can taste top class!”, thinking about all the ways you’ve experimented watching diy food videos you started thinking up of ways to serve it to him.

“I see, that’s a good idea and I think it’ll give us some headstart for our date wouldn’t it?”, saying that he gestured you towards one of the buildings that lead to the back exit.

Walking hand in hand Satoru came to a stop which seemed like a closed off gate that was not in use anymore.

“ Why are we here? I thought the back exit was the other way around?”, confusion painted over you face you turned to face your mischievous partner.

“ you said you’d help me eat them, and I think it’s a pretty good place, don’t you?”, stepping closer he urged you to take a look around. The area didn’t have any benches, buildings or even people around and the only sound you could hear was the birds and the small artificial streams of river that flowed a few steps away from the closed off exit.

If Satoru was insinuating something you started to get the hang of it and you soon felt you face get hotter. The afternoon sun did nothing to help you cool down as you struggled to make sense of the situation. His hands were all over your body, caressing, pinching and feeling you up.

“ What’s wrong? Not up for it in semi public style?”, his breathy voice got lost in the crook of you neck where he inhaled your scent, “ you know nobody’s gonna come” with a slight push, he pinned you againt the vine-covered gate, “Except for you”.

“what the- WAIT! It’s still so bright out here not to mention we’re in PUBLIC Satoru!”, wide eyed you try to grab at his hand that was halfway done unbuttoning the top of your blouse.

“Do you want me to blindfold you?”, throwing these words nonchalantly he started licking every bit of exposed skin he could find from your ears to chest.

His mouth made contact with your covered breasts and without bothering to remove the piece of clothing he latched his mouth onto your hardened nipple to give it a gentle bite. Holding back your own moans you placed you hands on his broad shoulders, a feeble attempt at stopping him.

“How would THAT resolve anything?!” already half naked, your retorts seemed like pathetic excuses even to your own ears. It wasn’t until you heard a sharp rip that you realised your underwear was no longer on your body anymore. With a horrified look you saw your unusable underwear in Satoru’s hand.

“ I don’t think you’ll be needing these anymore my sweetness because I want to see ALL of you”, dangling the fabric from his long fingers he made a show of tucking it in his pocket. Hiking your skirt up with one hand he caressed the soft flesh with his thumbs.

“I knew you had no sense of danger but this could even get us arrested”, your reasoning seemed to fell on deaf ears as your boyfriend, already half way down on the ground, pulled his blindfold down with ease. Looking at up at you with his ethereal turquoise eyes that lied beneath strips of heavy white eyelashes, this part of his face was something you couldn’t see all the time.

“You’re beautiful……”, the genuine nature of his words felt unreal when compared to his everyday frivolous self, “at least I’ve always thought so”.

All the voices in the place except for his, got drowned out by the throbbing of your heart in your chest when he kneeled right in front of your crotch. The warm smile on his lips contradicted with his tantalizing actions but he enjoyed it precisely because of that.

“Open your legs a bit more y/n, I need more space to eat”, with his haughty smirk back he exposed more of your pussy with his fingers and dribbled the strawberry sauce over it until it started trickling down to the ground underneath it.

“This looks like a good dessert, waaay better than the one I was offered before”, making one last smartass comment he threw the now empty packet away and your sugar coated pussy was soon met with Satoru’s soft, warm tongue as he buries his face in it. His tongue worked it’s way beneath the layer of your pussy hair and down to the soft flabby skin underneath. Your natural slick combined with the dressing sauce tasted even sweeter in his mouth, the pleasant hums falling uncontrollably from his mouth made you wetter.

All the blemishes, scars and your self imposed flaws started melting into something more complete and unbreakable in its nature when you felt Satoru touching you, feeling you and tasting you from the inside and out.

His warm hands firmly gripped your thighs to lap at the soft peak in between. All the sensations his tongue was providing you made your vision turn black and your body heated up to the point of burning. The broad daylight and your exposed form added to the fear of being found out but your trust in your boyfriend outweighed everything so you let him have his way.

“ Hmmm, yeah y/n…”, the exaggeratingly loud slurping of his mouth came to a stop as he looked up at you, his pink lips glistening even more when he spoke, “Even this cheap stuff tastes better when I eat it directly from you”.

You were a panting mess, already having lost the ability to make coherent words you kept you eyes on Satoru as rose to his feet.

“ Let’s move on to the next part shall we?”, after smoothening out your skirt of you he held out his hand and your need for release took over all rhyme and reason so you put one of your shaking hand in his. The next few moments were confusing as a white light enveloped both of your forms and by the time your vision returned you found yourself in an unknown room.

The place itself was nothing out of the ordinary, some books, a cupboard and a vanity. The single bed near the curtained window was properly made. It was clearly not Satoru’s room but the neatness of the place also suggested that it wasn’t an unused room either.

“ Hey we’re are we?”, you question the white haired male when he casually made his way to switch on the lights.

“Don’t worry we’re still in the academy premises, you wanted to finish this right? And I didn’t wanted to go another second with hearing your pretty voice, so you can scream now,” his voice dangerously low, he held your arms in both of his hands and guided you to the single bed in the corner.

“ and I didn’t meant that as a request”, flat on your back you had no time for further questioning as your exposed cunt got filled to the brim in a single thrust. The stretch made you cry out and remembering Satoru’s previous warning you didn’t bother covering your mouth. The light in the room was enough for him to see all of you, even if he had all of you memorized at the back of since the first time.

Your twisted face that you’d consider ugly was nothing if not arousing to him from the kneeling position of his at the edge of the bed, endearing even at how the side of your eyes well up everytime he fucked you so hard, the creaking of the bed acted as a proof of his brutal pace that threatened to break the furniture.

Each powerful thrust of his made your entire body lurch from its position, your juices flowed endlessly down your thighs, on Satoru’s cock and down to the sheets. Your voice ricocheted off the walls and gave life to the entire building.

Having your orgasm cut off before, the anticipation that had build up made your upcoming release feel even ore intense. Your walls started clenching around his shaft, already feeling waves of ecstasy you waited for it to reach its peak.

“ Y/n...Come for me”, in between his grunts he placed on of his hand on the side of your head, lowering himself till your noses touched. Breaths intermingling, you came with a loud cry of his name. Euphoria spreaded through both of your bodies making a gush of liquid come out of your pussy when Satoru pulled out, both of your mess soiled the sheet.

Few minutes of silence passed by as a fully clothed Satoru sat beside you, stroking your head until you calmed down.

“ Hey y/n?”, abruptly his cheeky tone filled the room and you looked up at him questioningly,

“ Wanna take a pic? ya'know, as a momento”, the odd question made you come to an obvious conclusion, which now seemed obvious considering your boyfriend’s not so secret rebellious nature and with how much of a brat he can be it was nothing short of hilarious.

“ It’s Lisa’s room isn’t it?”, barely controlling your laughter you tried to pry an answer out of him, the soothing motion of his hands never coming to a stop he took out his phone with another.

“ Yeah, it is, I’d say it’s an excellent way of showing her our ‘bond’ dontcha think?”, his cringey answer made you burst into laughter. The first real smile he’d seen on your face since you got here was something Satoru wanted to be a constant thing, always there when he wanted to see it just like a still photograph.

Bending his face down his lips softly met your forehead and before you could open your eyes back up you heard the click of the camera go off.

“ Heh, so how is it?”, propping yourself up on your elbows you tried to peak at the screen but it was pulled out of sight just as quickly.

“ It’s perfect”, with a warm smile that reached all the way to his eyes Satoru put his phone down before peering into your eyes, “and it’s mine”.