#and now theyre telling us WAY too much
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jajanvm-imbi · 29 days ago
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Everyone screaming about the new Incoherent video as if this isn't the consequences of our own actions
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phantom-thieves-official · 6 months ago
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something I really like about p3p compared to p5 is the extra bits of narration. I don't know if it's because the game doesn't have scenes with animated models or if regular p3 is like that, too, since I haven't played it. But like in Junpei's rank 10, when he's talking about going to see his dad, you get an extra text box that says 'Junpei's hands are trembling.' and in Shinji's rank 10 you get a few of them, one saying he toys with the pocket watch and one saying he looks down at his feet for a long time. Idk. They're nice. In p5, they use pretty much only the talking sprites and the character model animations to show emotion but things like trembling hands or staring at their feet are little things that probably wouldn't be animated but that add a lot to a scene I think.
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termagax · 5 months ago
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re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.
#HES MY PRINCESS IDEK.#i dont think it happens naturally all that much because theyre usually in the business of calling each other names and being mean#so i think this would just be a random night where theyre on top and just think it would be really funny. to yank on his leash and call him#a good girl after bullying him into doing something. and well i just think it would get him is all i dont knowwwwwwwwwwwwww#i havr a lot of thoughts on the matter but i will stop for now#but the tldr is that with each other they tend to switch frequently and are always fighting#so i think itd take someone else being in the picture for hog to even realize how much he likes being a good boy :3#and i also dont think fish would be good at straightforward domming in the way he would want and they both know that#so its something he keeps between him and rat mostly. please dont ask me questions abt jrs sex life i have too many opinions on it#anyways. i think even tho fish knows theyd be bad at that they still feel left out so sometimes they go watch. they dont get anything out of#doing that theyre just sort of taking mental notes#all of this circles back to i think fish has always been the more sexually experienced of the two. and romantically.#i dont rlly think hog is a guy who dates i dont think hes ever been that and i dont think he made much time for hookups#(i think its cute if hes a virgin when they meet but 🤷 im not solid on it)#but i think for him hes just only ever fucked this one person and they do a LOT of stuff and it gets the job done so hes just never really#tried anything else. but. and again i have too many opinions on this but i think rat wouldnt be into their usual shteeze#i think hes a bit of a freak in his own way but the blood and weird anger issues is just not doing it for him most of the time#but i do think if given the opportunity he would LOVE to be The Boss for a little bit so i think he and hog can explore that together and it#will work out beautifully for them. this is great because i am not into strict d/s dynamics like that but i know in my heart that hoggy#would be. and i cant do that for him#again i think fish would be butthurt about this. mostly in a 'why didnt u tell me so we could try this :(' and he would go#'because you would suck at it and wouldnt like it' and they go oh. right. well im still mad#ANYWAYS. circling back. i think the good girl thing would be something fish knows that rat doesnt. and idk if theyd tell him or not#because i do think if they tell him he is using that for evil hog is going to be a good girl forever and ever. rat doesnt have the patience#to space it out the way fish does. which idk maybe thatd be good for hog he could work through some stuff...#but on the other hand i think its fun if they DONT tell him and just bust it out sometime when all 3 of them are doing the deed. or whatever#because again they mostly like how embarrassed he gets about it and i think he would be reallyyyy flustered by it#^ this is essentially part of my fantasy about spitroasting my beautiful wife until he cries just so everyone knows#idk i just think when he lets go of himself hed be a very cute and kind of needy subby bottom and i think hed be really easy to fluster#about it and i want it so bad
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lovelyrotter · 8 months ago
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yknow i love transmasc/tboy dirk always and forever but the way some ppl treat transmascness vs transfemmeness in HS's narrative........kinda sucks. like the whole thing about how being transfeminine is a literal transient experience and lets the character in question (any character) truly escape the oppression of HS's narrative-as-a-character which is patriarchal and toxic (lord english, hussie-the-character to an extent. i guess. idk ive seen a lotta ppl lump SI-hussie in w/ this), which is great and does hold weight as an analytical lens esp with how hussie irl is nonbinary. but where does this leave transmasc characters. why are we treating (headcanoned) transfemme HS characters like this and then tbh gleefully dooming (headcanoned) transmasc characters to eternal narrative suffering brought by LE and then mocking them for being ''gross tboys'' full of ''icky testorerone'' so its their fault theyre in this perpetual torment really? because they ''''chose to be a man''''? dunno man its starting to feel bad. especially since some bnf's who are really into this fan theory do actually kinda treat the general idea of transmasculinity like somthing to hold with tongs at arms length away from them. as if its alien or infectous or something and then get really mad when equally dysphoric transmascs do the same with feminity. why are we dooming dirk strider to eternal toxic-masculine suffering and what does that say about how we treat real life transmasc folks both in and outside of the fandom
#my t#basically you arent more or less special or deserving of celebration or joy depending on what pronouns you use#and idk yall gender is such a personal thing and your trans experience def does colour the way you look at the world. it def does mine/ours#and i wish ppl on this site would be more honest about that cause holy hell do some of yall treat eachother like dogshit#PURELY on the basis of identity. you are no better than a TERF if you do this. you ARE a TERF if you do this#but like...........can we all at least TRY not to demonize '''the other side''' here#in quotations because theres no '''other side''' in the trans community we're all just trans in different ways#theres just like. yknow#theres a reason why so many tboys and transmasc folks identify with the striders and dirk especially#and theres a reason why *so many* transmascs felt so much joy abt tboy roxy#so many of our lives pre-transition looked and felt like roxy lalondes. so many of us legit forcefully feminized ourselves#bc the alternative was so fucking scary. as you can probably imagine regardless of what flavour of trans you are#theres also a reason why there are so many transmasc fictives named dirk and dave and idk what to tell these ppl abt that#i remember rlly clearly this affectionate joke like a literal decade ago on this site that was like#daves intro dropped and 1mil tboys named dave materialized into existence#dirks intro dropped and 1mil MORE tboys named dirk materialized into existence#i try rlly rlly hard not to get sour at wlw/nblw focused memes that are like#''i made pepsicola better!!! theyre she/theys now :)'' for example#but its getting increasingly harder to ignore when the same ppl who make these memes treat#fans who prefer m/m *bc they themselves are gay* like shit#or like enjoying m/m because theyre mlm is mysogynistic. which it isnt ffs#that shit gives i am uncomfortable when is not about me and i aint here for that#if i were like these ppl maybe id turn all their fave girls into tboys just to spite them#but it wont be just to spite them bc 1) i aint abt that actually. im too fuckin grown for it and 2)#i genuinely just enjoy exploring m/m and masculinity more because i am a trans mlm. its very simple math
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cinnabeat · 6 months ago
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rememebred everyones kh3 outfits and now im annoyed again
#twilight town people you were robbed so hard.......#its like. roxas in his normal outfit...this is fine its iconique i wish he got new threads but again this is acceptable anyways#the classic kingdom hearts look#xion. the black and ehite look is cute and while similar in style to kairi is different enough to be her own style and the colors are ones i#i associate with her...needs more classic khness but im fine with the results either way#axel..............................i discovered the shirt under the vest is like. a deep deep DEEP like maroon??????? and plaid of course#i think????? cant fucking tell either way it just looks like hes wearing different shades of black. similar in style to his old bbs outfit w#with enough org13 influence to be like yeah hes older with new experiences but hes still the same#HOWEVER. the all black look is simply lazy. like. u gave him a whole ass color palette in bbs and then refuse to add even a HINT of color#like im not saying make his outfit bright and colorful like in bbs and i admit axel in black is more recognizable than anything but like#come on not even a scarf as a call back? nothing to tie him back to who he was? nothing to be like yeah hes grown as a person? hes different#but still the same? LAZY. like come on what the fuck. ZERO of the classic kh style too its just a guy in modern wear i hate it#like congrats you made a man with flaminr red hedgehog hair look normal#he was so right for wearing the organization cloak until the end#AND THEN ISA??? its like. isa is what axel could have been. give him a little more blue instead of black AGAIN and its like yeah this is#this is saix who used to be isa who used to be saix etc like that is a man whos life experienced has changed him but he still remains the sa#same deep inside. now get rid of the fucking BLACK..#dont even get me started on the twilight trio what the hell literally ZERO of their previous personalities theyre all wearing fucking black#none of that old 2000s teenager energy its again LAZY. i hate these designs so much all of them everyone literally why#i have lamented abt riku so many times too but this time its abt the colors like literally who is that and where is rikus yellow#AND KAIRIS.........GIRL WHO IS THAT!!!! SHES TOO COZY!!!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO THE TOMBOY LOOK OF KH1 AND THE SPORTY LOOK IN KH2#'its cuz shes older 🙄' NOT BT MUCH?#i appreciate kairis scenes with axel bc its the closest wr get to her normal personality when shes not acting as a character crutch for sora#but again CLOSEST bc i still think shes too like. soft? literally whereee is her fire where is it where is the girl that swuared up againstx#that squared up against saix wheres the girl that jumped off a balcony to fist fight heartless when she didnt even have a keyblade#girl where#theres no fire under her!!!!!#fucking hell#im annoyed abt everything now#michi tag
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mantisgodsdomain · 1 year ago
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Milk and Green Apple for Penelope
(for this ask game)
Since we haven't introduced Penelope yet, as is standard, we'll do a quick write-up here. Penelope is a Galápagos fur seal (Arctocephalus galapagoensis). She's an accountant who works at a bank located in a tundra which primarily caters towards terrestrial animals. Though she doesn't particularly like her job, and initially picked this posting because it was the best option available to her during her CPA experience program, she sort of... got stuck.
Finding work is difficult. She was lucky enough to get rehired by the same branch after finishing her work experience program, but she can't really find anywhere else willing to hire her right now, and her branch is hesitant to let her go, considering that she's one of the most competent people available to her department. She can't really quit, but she can't really move forward, either, so she's sort of... stuck in limbo.
She's well-paid enough that she can live relatively comfortably, but she was at least partially a diversity hire to begin with, and the place she lives in now just plain isn't made for her. She's an aquatic species in a relatively dry area, and most of the species that her branch caters to are smaller prey species - hares, kea, and lemmings, and the occasional arctic fox. Most of the infrastructure is built for people half her size or more, and being an aquatic species, she's not really built to be living terrestrially 24/7 - wearing glasses is all well and good until your prescription breaks and the best replacement pair you can find is built for a stoat, and sure, she can afford a doctor if anything comes up, but no one in her area would really know much about her species, and can she really afford the time and effort added to the expenses of flying to somewhere else entirely just to see a specialist?
As is, she feels just... stuck. She handles it, mostly, with a mix of "gritting her teeth and bearing it" and "heading out to a nearby city which actually has infrastructure for anything bigger than a fox". She sort of has to make a Day of it every time she travels out, but it's better than staying in the same town all day, and paying a bit extra for a night out isn't *too* bad, all things considered. The situation, as is, is perfectly fine. She just... wishes that she could make something of her life beyond being stagnant in a town that she expected to just be a stop in the road.
🥛 [MILK] What is your OC's relationship with their biological parents like? What about their relationship with any non-biological parental figures?
Well... it's complicated. She doesn't have a bad relationship with them, per se, but it's a bit distant - she moved to an entirely different part of the world to take this job, and most of her communication with family members is by video call and similar things as a result. She cares for her family, and she wouldn't trade them for the world, really - but they expect a lot from her, and she's been stuck at the same place long enough that she's not sure she can live up to it.
Penelope sits in the awkward sort of space where she was academically successful, but that success didn't really transfer to almost anything else. She's got a job, she's good at it, she's got a degree - but she still can't get a job besides the one she's been stuck in for years already, and "still working at the same bank" isn't the sort of thing that feels good to say, especially when you've been in the same place for far longer than you've ever wanted to be.
Her parents love her. Her mother still holds out faith that she'll get that one promotion - just a few more years and you'll get your big break, just a bit more work and they'll notice how industrious you are, just a tiny bit more effort and you'll get a better position - but you can only believe something so much when you feel like you've been stuck in the same rut for so long. There's only so much you can hear about how you have so much potential before you start feeling like you're wasting yourself, and at this point... having the same things repeated starts feeling a bit like every day she doesn't get that break is a day she's wasting her potential.
She does not currently have any non-biological parental figures. Probably a bit late in her life to get one, but who knows at this point, honestly?
🍏 [GREEN APPLE] How do they differ from the norm and how are they punished for it?
...there's a lot.
Though her workplace tried to provide accomodations when she first arrived, it's been more than eight years, and nowadays she has to do most of her accomodation herself. Her eyes aren't really made to focus above water, she's got a very different body plan than most people at the branch, she's a predator big enough to make most of the other folks in her branch a bit instinctually nervous, and being one of the only seals that most people know means that she's been re-introduced to the same three harbor seals entirely too many times by now.
People don't really make chairs for people with tails the size of their bodies around here, which means that chair backs that accomodate her are generally a matter of either custom order or hoping that she's going somewhere that's dealt with one of the other half-dozen folks with the same needs.
Penelope is, fundamentally, Not From Around Here. She's not a species that's found around here, she's not a species that's especially adapted for here, and despite being a seal that's only around a metre long she still towers over most of the people at her branch. The closest person to her size is an arctic fox in the tax department, and he still doesn't really have the same sort of experience as her. She doesn't fit The Norm, pretty much in any way, and it... really, really shows.
#asks#we speak#ocs#penelope#we took a while to answer this but anyways heres penelope she works at a bank#and then on weekends she goes to the city to get drunk off her ass and try to forget the overwhelming dread of stagnation#top ten women to expose gaps in your accessibility just by going to your place#she goes to like the same bar every time she goes Out On The Town because its the one bar that another seal works at#and theyre usually pretty good with being Not Awful because of it#anyways the most vital info about her is that she very much needs glasses but she doesnt wear them unless shes at work#the fun thing about seeing other people's ocs is that we'll see so many people making characters who are like#Important. Powerful. Cool. shit like that. and then we are here with our characters like “yeah shes an accountant”#“she feels really stuck in life and like she cant live up to the standards of her family”#“also she has to special-order chair backs bc her tail is the size of her entire torso and no one accommodates for that here”#anthro#we guess#thanks for your patience btw! we spent. way too long figuring out how to summarize her#in case youre wondering she is also struggling with a mid-life sexuality crisis just as a treat for Us Writing Her#for fun. and profit. and also being at that age where she was supposed to have settled down with a nice boy already#and now her mother is dropping increasingly obvious “you know its okay if you have something you need to tell us penelope”#“if there are any special girls in your life that you might want to bring home-”#and she lives halfway across the world and isnt dating anyone or even sure that shes on the dating market anymore#problems disease and etc. this post is over 1000 words already we'll cut it off here
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Whats a nice way to tell people that freaking out every time a massive corporation uses AI art and acting like THATS what shows they have no morals is silly.
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meateater-rabbit · 1 year ago
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(dont read the tags actually)
#vent#god this year has been so fucking hard man#and things have been so strained with my friend#and i love them so much. theyre my best friend. but at this point are they?#cause they just keep getting pissed at me over everything#and acting really weird#and theyve just. turned into this unendingly angry and negative person to the point i feel like i can barely talk to them anymore#they are so short tempered which i mean they always have been but just not with ME yknow#like they for ten years were always so kind to me and weve always gotten along well#until the last like year#and i know theyre in a bad place but jesus theyve made it so hard to even hold a conversation anymore#and i mean i think things will get better if they can get out of their current situation. i really think we can go back to normal but just.#not til then. cause they seem like the only coping mechanism they use is pure fucking anger#and now theyve started directing it at me and im just. getting tired.#i cant tell if they are purposely pushing me away or not. but thats whats happening either way.#and its awful bc i just feel like its all my fault. like im not good enough#im not helpful enough im too annoying im just. not good enough care about anymore#they make me feel like none of my problems are important anymore and like i shouldnt even mention it if im struggling#meanwhile all they do is vent and rant and im really really tired but i dont think i can say anything#im trying to open myself up to being social with people other than them again.#they used to be my best safe space but now they arent anymore#but im still going to be there for them the best i can cause they dont deserve to be abandoned when theyre struggling#but i just hope they can get in a better place and idk. realize theyre kinda being a dick all the time#ugh idk#dont read this shit i just need to get my thoughts straight idk.#i was scrollin when i started thinkin abt this thats the only reason im writin on here abt it#probably gonna delete it in an hour anyway#moon
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skyllion-uwu · 1 year ago
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Am I nauseous because I'm hungry or because I triggered myself last night
#my stomach hurts and i need to eat but the idea of doing that is. ack#and i cant tell my parents why because id have to unpack so much spontaneously#like id have to explain i was on the internet before they let me make an account and that i didnt tell them when i was getting those dms#and how its basically ruined any neutrality i had towards sex because ill be fine and then BAM!#everyone else is 12 year old me and im an adult and im my abuser and im going to hurt them if i keep talking about this#just because it was only words doesnt mean it fucked everything up forever. i know back then i was aroace but didnt have the words#but i sincerely think id be just sex neutral if it wasnt for that fucking asshole and now i think about sex for too long and get sick#and i didnt say anything because i thought they were my friend and i dont know if they were 11 like they said they were or not either way#its just. im getting so much off my chest here i wish i could go back in time and tell myself to block after that first message#and i didnt say anything after i realized because i wasnt allowed to have social media and i didnt want to get in trouble over that part#fantasizing alone is one thing but as soon as someone else is involved theyre me and im that person on da and i hate it. i hate it i hate it#i hate it i hate it#is that a common thing. where you feel like youre the abuser in certain contexts even if youre nothing like them#whatever. i have physical therapy and then ask a prof if i can use him as a reference and then finish my application if he gets back to me#and then i can rot all i want#sky vents like amogus
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stupidnaturals · 2 years ago
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#GAH hate not knowing how ppl feel about me#bc i used to be SUPER close friends w this person like they were ~25% of th reason i came back to my uni town after moving away last summer#and i keep texting them like ' hey we should meet up sometime! ' and they respond ' omg YES 100% i have SO much i need to catch you up on !#unfortunately i am out of town every single day. also so busy. '#and like yeah okay college very busy life very crazy. but how are you out of town every single day and also why have you NEVER reached out#and i saw them in person at target and they seemed genuinely pleased to see me! and also said something like#' we gotta hang out i have so much to tell you!! *ill* message *you* ' in a way that seemed to convey guilt at ^^ all that#but then how in the WORLD do you happen to be driving out of town immediately after the one event i know we'll both be going to???#and also casually gracing over the fact i also mentioned getting dinner beforehand??#also i dont know any reason they wouldnt like me unless its one of those ' im autistic and didnt notice you getting fed up w me '#or if theyre just actually that busy or too anxious to see people or anxious to reach out or fucking whatever#and like even when i saw them at target they told me a bunch of stuff that i dont tthink youd say to a random acquaintance#which if they do still like me makes sense! bc we were super duper close once! but doesnt make sense if they dislike me/want me to go away#like UGH just either ask me to hang out or say yes to a hang out or tell me to fuck off already!!!!#oh and ALSO the one time we DID have plans we didnt set an exact time but they texted me at like 11 and said ok we can hang out now until 2#or they texted me at 11 and said ' i work at 2 but i dont think thats gonna be a problem also are you okay w hanging w my roomies too '#and i know their roomies so thats fine but i was like ??? WHAT shouldnt be an issue? r you gonna call off to hang out for more than 3 hrs?#or are you gonna friend break up w me so it wont take 3 hours#anyway i was like uhhh shit we didnt set a time so im actually at a tattoo place like an hour away w my roomie?#so we rescheduled for the next day when uh oh they hung out w someone who was exposed to covid so had to cancel again!#i cant think of a single reason they wouldnt like me except that they never did but we had an activity together so they were stuck w me#and they seemed genuinely happy to see me and also seem upset declining plans but like if thats true what the FUCK is happening????#anyway this was a mile long if you e read this far i love u if you have tips feel free to reply or dm me
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years ago
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#the burdent of not being understood. its annoying and i dont like it. also its my fault#because if u say something serious in a light tone ppl dont kno wtf to do. prob bc they dont kno if ur delusional or not and like dont#wanna upset u. but then its like annoying bc they still walk away worried and im like ok neither of us r happy bc u dont get how serious#thjs is but i cant tell u how serious it is without making u worried. and y should i make u worry if u can't fuckinf do anything abt it?#so its just annoying. which is to say i went to a retirement lunch today and it was as awkward as i imagined#bc it was me and my boss and a couple professors and i dont do well in these group situations anything so i spent a lotta time spaced out#not hearing anyone bc the noise in the room was messy and my brain was peeling away from my body. but whatever i was there. and my boss#drove us both and on the way back she started the. im worried abt u talk. which i feel like she was too hesitant abt it. which like i get#bc its awkward to bring up but like i dont give a fuck so idk i feel like u gotta start those conversations like. this is how watching u#makes me feel. idk whatever. and i was honest but like it was a 5min car ride so i didnt have thr time to be like ok heres the deal. ya#kno? so now im all annoyed bc my brain is fucking unbearable when i feel like i havent made my thoughts clear. and now its like. do i bring#it back up? or just let it go? whats to be gained by talking abt it? all that i have to say is upsetting bc im very aware im being self#destructive. thats the point. i get boried and my brain only lets me do like 2 things so i use those things to make myself insane. bc at#least then i can observe the symptoms of the stress im exherting on myself. and i kno that not good bc idk how to stop and ppl r always#like u gotta relax. what will help u relax? and im like u dont fucking understand. i cant regulate thr amount i like things. if i like#something i like it so much it becomes stressful. and i like drawing but its not relaxing. its a thing i have to do and its stressful bc im#constantly thinking abt making things perfect and never meeting thst mark. my happiest memories arent even happy moments theyre just times#where my brain stopped for a second and i could just breathe for a minute. so like i cant relax. i dont like anything a normal amount so#the solution must be medication. but my brain has decided im not allowed to fix this problem until i move away so like 🙃 and like i was#giving little bits of this in the car but its like lady i kno its a problem. ive known its a problem for years. the self awareness doesnt#help. except that it keeps me from doing anything extremely bad bc for me if i at least kno where it comes from i can b like ah yes. this#is fucking stupid lol. but i dunno how me sharing all this helps bc im sure it only raises the worry. but like its fine. i mean its not but#like ya kno. and i was kinda explaining how upsetting it is for me to have my schedule changed without warning even if its for things other#ppl would see as good and i wasnt thst firm abt it so it was: but i can't just do nothing for u! and i was like ugh fuck it fine whatever.#and like do i bring that back up bc it is like a respect my boundaries thing but like i feel like if i were anyone else it would be good#to drag someone out of their comfort zone but im being dragged into situations i find profoundly isolating bc i cant seem to function in#groups. ugh its just fucking annoying bc i dont want her to feel bad. i appreciate the effort but like ugh its exhausting. whatever. it was#anyway. im just annoyed thst i should have explained things better. also im annoyed thst i constantly forget most things taste bland and#then im annoyed when i hsve to eat bland things. i think my nose doesnt work right bc i csnt smell much either#unrelated
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termagax · 4 months ago
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i think even fish would sometimes be like ew no put your face back on. especially if hes being sappy or something they dont like looking at their dead boyfriend when hes being nice to them. its weird.
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forehead451 · 4 months ago
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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itsalwaysdark · 4 months ago
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and also it doesnt even matter if i miraculously get a job tmrw bc we don't have a car . and im too out of shape to walk anywhere bc everything is far away . so i genuinely dont jnow what to do
#im not smart or talented or hot enough to have a source of income working from home.#i dont have a ged or a kicense or a way to get to work or much experience + ive got a steadily fucking growing gap in my employment history.#And i have essentially 0 social skills i barely Function half the time im dissociated or just crying. im weak and out of shape and#not pretty im like. unhireable i think . and again even if a place did hire me I dont have a way to fucking get 2 work#i might be able to walk 2 a place if i had been at work for a while bc if be more used to being on my feet and active again. its take a#while and id be in a Lot of pain but like. itd be doable. and once i worked for s bit i could get lyfts even tho Expensive also idk that#there as many drivers here. and wtvr. but if i did that itd be Less money to help my family and less money to save up toget my own place and#atp maybe its selfish of me to want my own place and i need to judt be more grateful im allowed 2 stay here . yk#idk. im so tired i just need like. idk. ik the only way is to just get through it and get a job and make it work but it feels so pointless#everything always does. i cant keep getting over hurdles man im so fucking tired of getting through hurdles#every single day is Difficult and every single day is the Same and any time j manage to have a good day ill just go right back to feeling#exactly the same. and even if it looks like everythings better for a bit it all goes back down eventually and ik im supposed to be like But#itll get better again after that <3 ups and downs are a part of life <3 we have to have the bad to appreciate the good <3 im just fucking#sick of the goddamn bad im fucking sick of it ive had enough bad i want good. ik other ppl deserve it more i want everybody to have good#days and be safe and happy i don't want things to keep getting worse but everything just gets worse and all the good parts r tempirary and#im so tired. I am not your strongest soldier bro !!!#idk. i just want to be atable i dont need anything crazy i just want my family to live comfortably and to have enough money that i can#donate i rly donot need much i dont need that much food 2 survive i dont need a ton of space i dont need a nide house i like. i just want to#be Stable and know that everything will be ok. yk. at least 4 my family i want them all to be able to eat and the bills 2 be paid and#hopefully for lamp and the kids 2 go to college. bc lamp and tag both want to go to college and itsy is 6 so he soesnt care#but i want them to be able to so bad bc i can't and i ws never gonna be able to and i dont get to be whiny abt that but like. they want to#and theyre smart and passionate and like. i want them to be able to achieve their dreams and get to have normal lives and be fulfilled and#happy. yk. idk. annie showed me her schoolwork the other day and since it wa first week at like. an alt school it ws a lot of personality#type stuff and mental health stuff and im not gonna get into it bc its not mine to tell but. their answers for one of the things made me so#upset bc it sounded so much like me when i was their age and even now and it makes me feel so guilty that like. i didnt make it better for#them. im the one whos supposed to endure it and then theyre supposed to get to be happy but im too fuckinf weak nowadays and i can't keep#any of them safe or happy and i feel so insanely useless. i hate it i just want to be useful idc anymore like. i want to be good i want to#be helpful i want to be cared abt and its so selfish bc a part of me is like. Ohh wahhh we shouldnr have to do all that to be cared abt wahh#and its dumb bc Yes i do its my job. it just fucking sucks rn bc like i have all the like. sorrow over this being what i have to do and this#is my lot in life but i also have all the guilt over how im not doing it bc km lazy and selfish and i cant just work bc im . Ugh
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arolesbianism · 10 months ago
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Every now and then I remember that oni in fact will eventually have more lore added and I get so excited and scared for a moment and then I remember that it could take months until we see any of that and I proceed to forget abt it again and the cycle repeats
#rat rambles#oni posting#now it does sadden me a smidge that itll probably be in paid dlc but thats a problem for future me#the bright side of new lore is new lore#the downside of new lore is the eternal fear of canon jackie and olivia designs#not because Im opposed to them getting canon designs its just so scary#like what if klei made them white how would I move forward from that#and its not even a situation where I can say with any level of confidence if they would or not because god if I fucking know#like they have until very recently seemingly deliberately avoided including anything Too lore relevant in any animated trailers#but that can kind of just be explained by well. the fact that most of those updates didn't include any lore.#and those that do involve it stay strictly in the dupes perspective#so I can't rly use that as any sign that theyre deliberately avoiding giving olivia and jackie canon designs#I would highly prefer they dont get designs even without fear of designs I dislike mostly because narratively it just works better that way#but hey its not up to me so whatever happens happens#I mostly assume future lore is going to mostly relate to the dupe donors we havent met yet and elaborating on some of the ones we have seen#but dont see a lot of if anything at all#I hope they dont mess with jackie and olivia too much but I do think itd be nice to give jackie just a smidge more like Ive talked abt#and other than that I could see them adding maybe new story traits and if they're feeling real generous more dupe lore#oh and if we're mega lucky we could get a dr.holland first name#honestly I hope that for dr.holland specifically they either just do a hard name drop and move on or just dont touch him#rly my main concern with any added oni lore is I Really dont want them to start telling us too much#I really really like all of our information being very fragmented and unclear as it adds to the post end of the world vibe rly well#and this is in fact a problem that they had in older versions of the story that they seemingly went out of their way to solve#so I rly want to have faith that they wont fuck it up but I have been burned before and oni has yet to have fully earn my trust#its not far off tho just the scrapped logs themselves give me faith that they are aware what story theyre writing and what needs done#again the scrapped logs are cool but would have dampened the narrative quite significantly from how straight forward they are#so them being full one scrapped early on makes me hopeful that they realized that too#rly I just dont want too much expansion on the stuff we already know#some names and work ids would be splendid and Im all for new fragments to try to place in the timeline#I just dont want a log where nikola stares at the camera and monologues abt the duplicant project or smth
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sukunasweetheart · 2 months ago
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the tiger and his milk! 🐯
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in this world, a certain tiger hybrid male keeps a keen eye on a cow hybrid female next door...
warnings; female reader, inaccurate?omegaverse, lactation without pregnancy, animal-human hybrid AU (but theyre more human than animal tbh just imagine them with ears and a tail), heat and rut, breeding, alcohol as aphrodisiac, bullying of the cervix, tit sucking, nipple teasing, biting, dry humping, overstimulation, sexual frustration, neighbours-with-benefits, knotting, f!masturbation, lots of cum, this is straight up just a hxntai oop
word count; 6.5k
dividers by @/saradika-graphics and @/thecutestgrotto
do NOT expect a serious and well-paced writing from this one, i was horny and the end result is just.... this. sorry not sorry, I AM WARNING YALL; this is one degenerate ass fic also forgive me for any inaccuracies in any of the tropes i used, i just cherry picked the parts i wanted and mixed it all together so...
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moving to this new neighborhood hasn't been all too easy for you.
being a little low on money aside, there's a certain rambunctious neighbour who won't leave you alone. he playfully terrorises you with threats to eat you up, and makes comments that all go straight to your head, making you feel weak and flustered, leading you to cower beneath him. though you should firmly tell him to cut it out, you struggle to do this when you’re dealing with someone who could be a natural predator of yours, had you been an actual sow and not a hybrid. 
that, and also-
strangely, there's a part of you that doesn't despise the way he treats you. in fact, when you see his large, brutish hands and the veins that run up his arms, you feel yourself squeezing your thighs together. you brush it off as it being a result of your apparent loneliness and sexual frustration. there's nothing good that'd come out from being with such a discourteous man.
setting that aside... there are numerous other problems that you've been having to deal with, recently.
your breasts have been collecting milk faster, and much more than usual, recently.
even for cow hybrids, milk should only be produced when the female is pregnant, and for only a year or two at most after giving birth. for some unknown reason, you produce it all year round, even without needing to have children. doctor after doctor you've visited, and all they've told you is that you're a strange anomaly. there is nothing you can do about it except extract it every now and then, to relieve the pain and swelling.
tonight, that is what you're planning on busying yourself with, once you get home from your shitty office job.
walking towards your porch with a deep sigh, you hear a deep voice call out to you.
"bad day at work, dollface?" your terrible neighbour-- sukuna, he's called, asks you with a cigarette in his hand dressed in jeans and a black tanktop. his tail swishes playfully behind him.
dollface. one of the few nicknames he uses condescendingly to refer to you. it's either dollface, doll, or sweetheart, and you don't recall ever hearing him actually use your name.
"um, work was alright... thank you for asking. have a good evening."
you like to make things short and stop any further conversation from happening, even though it might come off as a little awkward. one of sukuna's ears flick at your dry response, but he doesn't seem to bother you any further as you hurriedly unlock your front door and head inside.
sukuna drops his cigarette bud on the ground, and puts out the flame by stepping on it. you're not very sociable, as per usual...
but your sweet, passing scent makes for a little growl to rise in the back of his throat. sweet milk. that's what you always smell like. how curious. how tempting.
once you're home, you immediately grab your breastmilk pump that sits beside your sink. it hasn't been too long since you last cleaned it. you unhook your bra, and grimace at the wet stains on it, from leaking bit by bit throughout the day.
you press the pump up against one of your breasts and press the on button. it starts doing it's job. you sigh from relief, and watch as it fills up quite quickly. you wonder what you should do with all of it...
you stop the pump to empty it out into a glass bottle. it's a tedious process. sometimes... sometimes you wish you had a partner who could help you with it. sometimes, you wish someone would latch their mouth on and extract you directly-
what if he-- sukuna- did that for you? forcefully held you down and-
your eyes widen and your tail droops with shock at your own intrusive thoughts. heavens, no! you need to get yourself a partner. it's been too long. you hope you're not heading into heat already? it's not time for that yet, at least not according to your usual cycle. shaking your head as you extract the remnants of the milk from your breasts, you finish up quickly.
at least tomorrow, it will be saturday.
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you'd forgotten about how overgrown the grass in your front yard had gotten. so, even though it's a saturday, and despite how you'd love to stay inside with all the curtains shut and doors locked tight... an unpleasant duty calls outside.
but despite the meticulous preparation of lathering enough sunscreen over yourself in protection against the sun's rays - the lawn mower suddenly doesn't want to heed to your calling.
your face scrunches up into a frown. darn thing.
the useless machine splutters and makes an obnoxious noise only in the beginning before giving out, no matter how many times you try to rev it back up again.
"goddamn it. you stupid thing," you mutter under your breath, crouching down to inspect it.
"need help?"
sukuna leans against the fence that is shorter than his own height, watching you with amusement. he'd been observing you for quite a few minutes by now.
"no thank you. i'm quite alright..." you respond without turning back. you know damn well whose voice that belongs to.
but does he listen? of course not! you hear the noise of the man easily bypassing the fence by elegantly hopping over it, before walking over towards you. how funny, even the fence fails to serve it's purpose in this moment.
"like that's believable. you think verbally degrading it will make it work?" sukuna snorts, coming around and shooing you away from the lawn mower.
he gives it a nice big rev, but not much happens. you smile slightly, wondering if he was going to make a fool of himself, after all that big attitude.
sukuna brings his foot against the side of the machine and gives it a hard kick. the sound startles you.
and now it's starting up nicely, and beginning to do it's job.
the man begins to mow your lawn for you, without another word. you stand around, not knowing what to do... your ears flicker as you stare at him doing your job for you. it feels odd. what is he up to?
well... no matter the hidden motive, it's true that he's doing you a huge favour. perhaps you should at least make a cold beverage for him, once he finishes with your yard. after observing him for a while, you head back inside to search for what would serve as an appropriate iced drink.
by the time you've stepped back outside, the yard is cut neatly and sukuna is in the midst of returning your lawn mower to your garage.
you silently hand him over his drink, and he takes it with a smirk.
"it's gone..." he suddenly comments.
"what's gone?" you question, with a raised eyebrow.
"that sweet smell that always surrounds you."
he proceeds to down his drink very quickly, not breaking eye contact with you. then, he starts chewing on the ice, tail swishing mischievously behind him.
"i... don't know what you mean." you cross your arms.
"hmm. playing dumb, i see. that's fine, i suppose."
you stand awkwardly with him in silence, simply listening to him crunching away on the ice. the heat from the sunlight gets more and more unbearable.
"if you're done with your drink... i think i'll start heading back inside now. thank you for your help today," you tell him politely, carefully taking your cup back from his hands.
he makes it seem like he's handing it over to you obediently, but then he tightens his grip against it when you're holding onto the glass, making you stare up at him in confusion. he pulls it back, so that you stumble closer to him.
"just letting you know. if you need any help, you can always ask me."
you're a bit nervous, but you try not to show it. does he know something? how much does he know? you feel your tail cowardly fall in between your legs. sukuna's ears give a light flick, but you don't know what that means.
"...we're neighbours, after all."
you look at him with distrust, holding onto your cup tighter. your gaze is unwavering as you meet his eyes.
"sure. i'll keep that in mind," you respond slowly.
seemingly satisfied, he lets go of your glass.
"thanks for the drink. see you."
it's a short backhanded wave he gives you, before he hops over the fence again. you narrow your eyes. just what kind of fence is this useless? can't even keep away one bad, bad man. you're not sure how much he's caught onto, but you sure hope he stops being interested in you with enough time. he easily sends odd tingles down your spine, and you don't like that one bit.
not at all...
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the working part of an office job isn't actually that bad.
it's the people involved around you that makes it a living hell. nothing gets your blood pressure higher than your collusive colleagues and snobby superiors - especially the lazy ones who do everything to shove their workload onto other people.
such people are yet also, annoyingly obsessed with get-togethers and teamwork, which makes you laugh.
today is such an unlucky day, that you've been dragged off to an after-work gathering at some cheap restaurant with your shitty coworkers, all because one of them decided that they needed one.
nothing like being surrounded by a bunch of people that you hate, on a wednesday evening. you have to put on a fake smile, and remain the passive, agreeable coworker in this environment. they coerce you to drink more alcohol. you want to decline, but you feel as though you'll ruin the mood if you turn them down. you down a few pints of beer.
you can feel your breasts leaking again.
just let me go home, you think to yourself, for the fifth time in a row.
your wish is only granted after an hour or two later. you're still sober, maybe a little tipsy, seeing as you can feel the heat in your face from the alcohol. your body is probably not taking it very well today.
the first thing you do when you get home is washing your hands and settling down with your little trusty pump. when you undo your bra, you sigh in relief as your chest feels free. and also...
it's probably the alcohol acting as an aphrodisiac - you're a bit more sensitive tonight. you caress the swell of your breast and groan, your horniness overriding how tired you are. your other hand wanders down your panties, and your ears droop down.
you purse your lips together and let your fingers work against your clit for an orgasm that you know will be unsatisfactory, but you chase after such pleasure regardless. your breaths quicken, and you tilt your head back, closing your eyes. nearly there...
just when you were about to reach your first high of the night, a firm knock is heard from your door. just your luck. a ruined orgasm.
who can it be, at this time of the evening? you throw on a cardigan that just barely covers you up, and boldly stomp towards the door, irritated. you could give this person just about any piece of your mind.
but when you open the door, you're met with your most cunning and bothersome of a neighbour, sukuna. maybe it's because you're hornier than ever right now - you feel as though he looks even...hotter, tonight. his scent makes you dizzy.
sukuna had come by because he needed an ingredient for his dinner.
he wasn't expecting to be met with the eye candy that is your slightly disheveled self, with one hand keeping your loose cardigan together, while you're very obviously braless, judging by your nipples jutting out against the fabric. that, and the thick smell of your arousal that hit him right when the door had opened.
"wh-what do you want?" you ask, a little breathless, trying to keep it together.
sukuna looks down at you, trying to keep himself calm. this seems amusing. he doesn't think he'll be able to stop himself from tenting his pants soon, if he stays around you longer...
"you look like you were busy with something... sorry to interrupt," he voices slyly, his fangs showing when he smiles.
"just... get on with it, please," you frown, your legs squeezing together. you can never tell what he's thinking - whether he knows everything or if he's pretending to know everything.
"nothing much, just ran out of salt at home. could i get some of yours?" sukuna shrugs innocently, holding up his empty salt jar.
"hold on a second."
you turn around to button your cardigan up with a sigh of annoyance, and you tell him to come in while you grab your salt from the kitchen.
once sukuna steps inside, he observes a million details at once. the very first thing he sees is your little pump that you'd forgotten to put away there. there's no way that puny thing is enough for you, is it?
in your kitchen, you grab your jar of salt, and attempt to open the thing - but your arms feel like jelly at the moment. you grit your teeth and try harder, cursing at yourself for shutting it so tight the last time you used it. you begin to strain your arms further. sukuna marvels at this excellent opportunity he is granted.
your feelings of irritation are whisked away when a pair of hands gently land on top of yours, against the jar. his fingertips reach the lid through the gaps between your own fingers. you feel the bigger man's body warmth, when he comes around from behind. it makes you feel so weak. your tail is hanging off to the side, raised high.
sukuna applies a bit of pressure, and the jar comes off easily. you note how warm his large hands feel.
"i came here for the salt, but now i'm thinking maybe i won't need it anymore..." he whispers down at you. your ears can't help but flicker from his voice.
"what... do you mean by that?" you ask, not knowing what to think.
he guides your hands to put the salt down on the counter. and then his body presses up against yours a little harder. you can feel his growing boner against your behind, and you feel lightheaded. sukuna peers down longingly at the exposed side of your neck.
your pheromones mix with his, and his fluffy tail curls around your leg, almost possessively. sukuna's hands are still holding onto yours, and you feel your breaths get more laboured by the tension.
"i promised to lend my help, didn't i? c'mon..." he coaxes, speaking closely so that his breath grazes against the skin of your neck.
you feel yourself starting to sweat a little more - his body heat is just too much. your chest is uncomfortably full, and the thought of someone sucking on your sensitive nipples is enough for you to finally cave in, and play the fool for the night.
you break free from his grasp for a moment, and hesitatingly point to your couch.
"...sit. it's probably easier on the couch," you tell him, not looking his way. and now you're even shoving him towards it, impatiently.
"my, how demanding," he comments teasingly. he knows you purposefully broke the tension - to prevent him from taking the lead. but he obediently takes a seat on your couch. following that, you awkwardly mount him and sit on his lap.
sukuna watches with a softer smirk as you unbutton yourself again, revealing your leaky breasts with a flustered look on your face. sukuna's hit with that familiar sweet scent that's always been floating around you all this time - but now, it's right in front of him, in full force. it makes his mouth water. he was right about you lactating.
"....go ahead," you tell him shamelessly, yet still sorely embarrassed, cheeks feeling so warm that you're concerned you might pass out. "just be gentle," you warn him, looking at him with a little hesitation and pursed lips.
sukuna feels his cock twitch against you, and he wonders if you can feel it too, from the way you're sitting right on it. his own face feels quite flushed - any man would be the same if they were in his position. such a pretty thing in his lap, willingly undoing her buttons for him. he's never seen tits more beautiful than yours.
"hurry-" you breathe out, impatient, and moreover, shy from the way he's shamelessly admiring your face and chest with a dumb smirk plastered on his face.
not even a millisecond after you say it, he puts his searing hot mouth around one of your nipples. your brain ceases to function as a zap runs through your body, and you whine without meaning to, your back arching. though you grab at his shoulder, your other hand claps over your own mouth to muffle your moans.
the suction of his mouth does wonders for pleasure, nothing like the dull feeling that your mechanic pump gives. you hear his throaty growls as he sucks on your nipple, getting a mouthful of the taste of your sweet milk. you shudder on top of him, becoming pliant with his touch.
sukuna bathes in your warmth and the softness of your breasts, enjoying how he is able to breathe in your scent from this close. your milk isn't like anything he's ever had before. not too sweet and yet not bland - a taste that is unique to you...
his other hand squeezes your other nipple, making sure it isn't too lonely from his touch. you jerk your hips against him, whole body twitching from the pleasure, the joy of having your tits milked by someone else rather than yourself. you can't hold your moans back any longer.
"fuck... oh please..." you mumble, feeling your breast being drained of it's milk.
he stops sucking for a moment, and you see the beautiful but subtle blush on his cheeks, as he looks up at you like he's intoxicated. he lets his tongue out and flicks it up and down your erect nipple, rolling it around the areola. it makes you whimper and tremble in his lap.
"don't... tease me..." you say through gritted teeth, frowning at him while he merely chuckles at your reaction.
sukuna attaches his mouth to your other breast, as it's leaking so much - as if to beg him to drain it next.
your cunt is pulsing so bad, and you feel yourself drenching your panties already. you subconsciously grind down against him and his obvious boner, trying to relieve yourself, desperate to reach a proper orgasm this time. both of you are in a lusty haze, unconcentrated eyes, you're lost in pleasure and he's lost in the taste of you, your breast milk dripping down his chin as he messily gulps down with greed.
sukuna also bucks his hips up against you, cock straining in his pants - god, he's so hard that it hurts. when was the last time he's felt such a way? he breathlessly sucks and slurps everything out of you, feeling the milk pass down his throat and into his stomach. he could drink this shit forever.
he wants to cum. he's gonna fucking cum. into his pants no less, like a damn virgin. with the way you're rolling your hips around and grinding down on him like a whore, its only a matter of time.
"haah... sukuna... more- do it more," you plead, relishing in the pleasure of having your tits taken care of, while you get yourself off on his very obvious erection - rubbing your clothed cunt against him. it feels so good on your sensitive clit, you're gonna lose your damn mind.
sukuna doesn't pry his lips away from your nipple, but his hands come off your breasts - you feel his arms wrap around your waist instead, holding you down against him tightly, guiding your hips and helping himself dry hump you harder while his face is still all up in your tits.
your breathing quickens even further, and you grab fistfuls of his shirt on his back, shutting your eyes in anticipation-- before letting your orgasm crash over you completely. you gasp as your clit throbs intensely, and you feel slick leaking all over in your panties as you ride your climax out against sukuna's hard cock, shuddering as you do so.
sukuna groans with his mouth still on your breast, his orgasm coming a little later than yours, dick twitching as rope after rope of his cum soils his boxers, hips bucking up into you without control - it feels so restricted in his shorts, and he desperately wants to take it out. his lips finally leave your swollen nipple with a little pop sound. his large hands come to grope the soft flesh as he comes off his high, a dull throb ringing in his cock, one orgasm being far from enough.
"look at you, rubbing your cunt all over my cock to get yourself off, like a proper slut. aren't you a little too eager?" he teases breathlessly, with a weak smirk on his face.
"you're the one... that came onto me so strongly..." you pant, drunk from the waves of pleasure you just received, and from the endless twitching of sukuna's giant cock... he's still hard.
"just admit that you're perverted. arguably, even worse than what i am," sukuna mocks, pinching at your nipples, making you wince.
"shut up, you."
in the spur of the moment, you lift your hips up slightly to shove your hand down his pants to take his dick out due to irritation. sukuna gives the slightest flinch from the sensation of your hand, grabbing onto his now bare erection.
you begin to fiercely jerk him off with a frown on your face, wanting to punish him for his comments a few seconds ago, knowing he's still sensitive from his recent orgasm.
"fuck-! what're you-" he cuts his own voice off with a choked off gasp due to the tight grip of your hand against his twitching cock. he's back to bucking his hips again as you pump up and down with both hands, his dick already being lathered with his own cum making it easier for you. the noises that come out of him almost fills you with pride - and also surprise. you'd never thought that someone like him would ever moan in this way... you jerk him off faster, and a little harder, being fixated on his pretty looking cock that keeps jumping in your hands.
"shit! that's- enough-" sukuna gasps again, chest heaving and whole body jerking, but oddly, not attempting to stop you at all.
you watch in awe, as his cock spurts out several strings of white cum once again, his head tilted back with deep groans, dick pulsing - your hands keep away from it for the first few seconds just to observe, but then you help to milk it dry, grabbing his base and slowly stroking up and down. he shudders from your touch, and the sight of him being so sorely sensitive makes you feel your heartbeat in your pussy again.
he really does cum a shit ton. it goes for what seems to be like ages, never ending pulses of his cock and rope after rope tainting your hands, and his own stomach. the way he shivers before you, how captivating his groans sound, it all makes you want to do it all over again.
you slowly rub his tip against your palm, playing with his dick as if it were a toy - but this time, he grabs your wrist to stop you.
"enough..." he says with a low voice - and the look that he gives you sends a shiver down your spine.
he's beginning to smell a bit different. its not like before. and it's getting thicker by the second...
"ah, fuck.... i'm in rut," sukuna admits with a scowl, and a flushed face.
the realisation hits you like a truck.
"look at what you've done," sukuna growls as he grabs your hips and pushes you closer towards him, his cock impossibly harder. he's breathing heavily, and you see the precum that's gathering on his tip. he won't be able to hold himself back much longer, and you know it.
and curse the omega in you - you're unable to resist him, and you can feel yourself syncing with his rut, a strange swoop occurring in your stomach. his strong pheromones make you lightheaded and feverish, instigating your submissive side as you become obedient - sitting on his lap with an eager shine in your eyes, breathing heavy from his strong scent and your desire to be dominated.
you want to have your brains fucked out. you can't take it anymore.
as if reading your mind, sukuna lunges forward and practically throws you onto your back on your couch - you let out a yelp and watch as he pulls your shorts and panties down and casts them aside, stripping you completely. you feel so vulnerable, but his intense strength and desperation is only adding to your arousal.
he pushes your knees up and rubs his cock up against your clit, and puckering hole.
"look at all this slick. you want me that bad huh?" sukuna remarks darkly, sweat gathering on his temples.
you grit your teeth, fighting the urge to give him a meek response - having the strange desire to provoke and set him off until the end.
"you're the desperate one here..." you tell him breathlessly, sensing how his dick is practically begging to be inside you, with the way it twitches on your cunt.
your blood runs cold for a second, when you see the way he looks down at you, with a vein popping out on his forehead.
"...maybe i am," he relents, with a low voice, grabbing your face.
and then he leans down to shove his lips against yours, while thrusting his cock into you at the same time.
you whimper into the kiss as his tip hits your womb like nothing. you'd ignored how massive he was at the start, but now it's impossible to brush off.
"t-too big..." you mumble when he breaks away from your lips.
sukuna groans as he drags his cock in and out of your sopping cunt, practically holding him in an iron grip from the suction. your endless amount of slick coats his dick with plenty of lubricant to fuck you more easily.
"you can take it, doll. i'll make you take it..."
his eyes dilate as he begins to piston his hips at a fast but uneven pace, groaning shamelessly as his cock ravishes your pussy by hitting all the right places, heavy balls smacking against your ass with every thrust. the pleasure runs through your veins like electricity, and you feel high off the feeling of someone so big and strong using you like you were his fleshlight - to relieve his rut.
you can barely breathe from the way he pounds you, relentlessly pushing you to the limit, tears forming in your eyes and high pitched moans coming from your throat.
"ohh-! sukuna... oh, please please please..." you plead, almost sobbing.
he responds by leaning down to lather his tongue against your scent glands, sucking on them and rest of the skin on your neck. you shudder and let out another set of whimpers - and sukuna's fangs feel antsy, wanting to sink them into your flesh.
sukuna aims for the sweetness from your breasts, to distract himself. you cry out as he roughly latches onto your nipple and begins to suck as he squeezes your soft flesh. his cock feels like it's about to burst.
when he stimulates your nipples a certain way and his tip grazes your g-spot at the same time, you're hit with an orgasm that makes you squeal and has your cunt fluttering uncontrollably.
his dick gives in to the sudden milkings of your pussy and sukuna pushes his hips to settle himself into you as deep as he can - giving a choked off groan from the sudden climax as his cock swells up inside of you, anchoring itself.
the knowledge of him knotting you doesn't seem to matter as you enjoy the feeling of the warm gush of his cum pouring into your womb, his balls clenching with every rope that spurts out, messily coating your walls with white.
sukuna pants so heavily above you, abs flexing as he continues to orgasm in your warm cunt that still has a dull pulse from your previous climax. he nuzzles into the crook of your neck with a soft growl, and you wrap your arms around his shoulders.
your breathing relaxes as you lay still on the couch while sukuna weighs you down and breeds you properly, consequences be damned. you could try and fight him off, but it's been so long since you've been so sexually satisfied that your logical thinking has turned itself off. all you want to do is enjoy bathing in the pheromones of your alpha and let the heaviness of his large body drape over yours as he pumps you full of his babies.
sukuna is usually very careful about who he's around when he's in a rut - and he's always made sure either he or his partner had some sort of protection on before doing anything. he wouldn't want to go around having kids with the wrong people. it's hard to say whether you're wrong or right for him - he doesn't know much about you to judge yet...
but you make him feel so right.
and he's still fighting off the urge to mark you to make you officially his, with drool beginning to run down his chin. his fangs are making it unbearable; he needs to bite something right now.
"you look restless..." you tell him, getting him to tear his gaze away from your neck, to your face instead.
you pull him in for a messy kiss, slipping your tongue into his mouth. he feels the way you brush over his fangs, paying extra attention to them as you make out with him, and it makes him groan. you must have done this with someone else before. sukuna nips at your tongue and lower lip, doing his best not to break skin - trying to relieve himself of the urge to bite.
the swell of his knot is gradually subsiding, but you know that the night is far from over.
"which way to your bedroom?" sukuna asks after breaking away from your kiss, breathlessly.
"farthest down the corridor, past the kitchen.." you respond, feeling a little needy after he abruptly stopped the kiss like that.
"hold onto me."
he lifts you up easily with his arms, and you wrap your legs around his waist, arms over his shoulders. the display of strength makes your heartbeat quicken.
when you're laid upon the soft mattress of your bed, his lips come crashing down again - while his hips begin to give shallow thrusts, cock still hard and throbbing. sukuna kisses you like he's a man starved, and you feel as though he might actually swallow you up at this rate.
the strong grip on your hips tighten as his pace gets rougher. you have to break away to gasp and moan. every time he jostles your body, you feel his previous heavy load sloshing inside you, and it's getting too much. sukuna doesn't look like he's even entirely here, hips moving mindlessly and drool dripping down his chin - it's a terrifyingly arousing sight.
he tries to come down and kiss you again, but you have to push his face away - you're so out of breath that you're afraid you might pass out if he does that again. it's overwhelming, how his thick cock bullies itself against your walls over and over again.
sukuna doesn't seem too pleased that you're pushing him away; he holds you tighter and he adjusts his hips to fuck you deeper. you mewl loudly, but keep your hand weakly against his face - he doesn't force it away, but lets his tongue droop out, caressing your fingers with it. you feel him bite and suck on your hand as his sharp thrusts produce small bulges in your stomach.
you witness his eyes dilating again, and you swear you see hearts in them this time, your fingers still in his mouth.
his dick feels so, so good in your pussy. your intoxicating smell now surrounds him after coming into your bedroom, and it's driving him insane. he grunts above you, balls feeling heavy, dick pulsing as his tip finds its way knocking on your cervix. there's a thick ring of cream foaming on the base of his cock now, a mixed concoction of both his cum and your slick.
his thrusting gets sloppy and his hips stutter, meaning that he's going to orgasm again. sukuna's eyes roll back, as he messily "kisses" your hand, pushing himself balls deep into you at the final moment.
you arch your back at the sensation of his knot swelling up once again, cumming at this moment. sukuna almost topples over from the tightness, as the walls of your cunt flutter around his knot, effectively squeezing everything out of him.
"f-fu-uuck..." he drones, his voice dragging the curse word out.
you feel him dumping every drop into your poor womb, emptying his balls. you're afraid that you'll get addicted to this "full" feeling, the warmth of his seed filling you up, the way your insides can feel his cock twitch violently with every thick string of cum he shoots out. you never imagined being held down and inseminated would feel this good.
sukuna's eyes are half-lidded, pleasure continuing to run up and down his spine. he pins your wrist down against the bed suddenly, and latches his mouth to one of your breasts - beginning to suck immediately, like he's trying to rehydrate himself with your milk. you shudder. it seems as though he's doing nothing but take, take, and take from your body... not that you'll stop him from doing so.
you run your fingers through his soft hair, catching your breath, slightly trembling each time he sucks a little too hard. shortly after he is seemingly content, he completely collapses his body over yours, face all up in your breasts, purring while his knot still sits inside of you.
you sense that it's only the beginning of a long, long night.
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once the sun has rolled into the sky, you finally remember the fact that the weekdays haven't finished yet - and that you're supposed to be getting ready for work right now.
problem is, there's a certain someone clinging to your whole body from behind, still purring against the nape of your neck with a hand lazily groping the flesh of your tit. you can feel his fluffy tail curling around yours, possessively. you're sleepy, and his stupid purring keeps coaxing you to take a nap. he's a lot more docile and softhearted than you imagined. you supposed he'd be out of your house by now.
you reach out and feel around to grab your phone, to give your workplace a call to take the day off. while you're on the phone, sukuna places soft kisses down your back. you hope your boss can't hear the excessive vibration in the background. once you're done with that, you shove your phone under your pillow.
"i need a nap... you can use my shower, or go home, whichever you prefer," you tell him sleepily, shutting your eyes.
"is sleeping next to you also an option?" he asks from behind you, snuggling up closer.
"mm," you reply mindlessly, already dozing off. he slips his arm under your head. admittedly, his arm pillow does feel comfortable.
when you next wake up in a few hours time, you don't know what to feel when you notice that he's still next to you in bed.
"finally awake?"
"yeah... i'm surprised you haven't left," you mumble, following that with a yawn.
"i'm surprised you're not chasing me out," he shoots back.
"what would be the point? i'll see you again the moment i step outside the house."
"i bet you love that. being able to see me all the time," sukuna teases, twirling a strand of your hair with his finger.
"ugh, think what you will," you roll your eyes, trying not to be flustered.
you suddenly realise how thirsty and hungry you are.
"i'm starving... i don't remember what's in the fridge," you mumble to yourself.
"hop in the shower with me and i'll take care of all your meals today," he offers, smirking.
you don't really trust his intentions - especially something as intimate as showering together - but you are famished, and you don't think you will be bothered to cook at all today.
"what meals are we thinking?" you ask, curious.
"hm. well, how about steak?"
"... is that a threat?"
sukuna bursts into laughter.
he informs you that the salt he had originally wanted from you was supposed to be for the steak he was cooking last night. who knew that he'd be having a different kind of steak that evening? you look unamused as he makes the joke between chuckles.
unsurprisingly, you do end up in the shower with him, and again, unsurprisingly, he does pay extra attention to soaping up your tits in particular, and making out with you a little here and there. but as promised, you are rewarded with possibly the best meals you've ever had since you moved to this neighbourhood.
after a bit of conversation, turns out the man is a freelance chef, which is something you would've never guessed. from first glance, he seemed like he could've been part of some gang or a shady underground business.
when you sheepishly apologise for misjudging him based on his looks, sukuna laughs once again, and tells you that he'll forgive you if you let him continue to "help you out" from here onwards...
the rest is in dot points bc im lazy!
originally, i had wanted to make this a bit more toxic but i turned it more wholesome bc i felt like ive already posted toxic stuff before this so haha...
btw you do a few pregnancy checks while sukuna is still there after that night, and it turns out negative. it's a big sigh of relief for you and while it should be the case for sukuna too, since he's never really liked the idea of having kids, for some reason there's the tiniest twinge of disappointment...
anyway - after this, their relationship turns into a weird mix between friends with benefits and ?lovers, semi slow burn
often crashing in each others beds and sharing meals, but also having periods where you won't see one another for a week or so when life gets busy
thing is, you always try and tell yourself that you'll only use him to relieve the swell in your breasts, but it's never the case. things always go out of control and you end up bouncing on his cock without thinking of the consequences.
and he can't stop himself from teasing you everytime, those tits of yours could kill a man, he swears. sukuna gets extremely touchy with them, grazing his fingertips over your nipples, groping you with your shirt still on like a lewd old man, life just feels better when he has your tit in his mouth or hands. it hardly feels like he's actually bullying you when he gets hard like a mf while doing it.
and there are moments where he blurs the line between FWB and becoming something a little more, like when he scents you before you leave his place. "...why're you scenting me?" "why not?"
there is an incident that happens in your house one time, where a huge water leak had happened while you were away at work, drenching the floorboards and things requiring a lot of fixing. you had nowhere else to stay that wasn't either a motel or some cheap sauna so sukuna offered you to sleep at his place for the time being.
it really made things between you two feel a lot more intimate and romantic, a lot of tension, especially when sleeping together without the sex and doing all the chores. both of you felt a little empty when the house maintenance was all done and you had to go back to your own place.
"but there's nowhere for you to sleep except for my bed. i'm not bothered to clean out any of the spare rooms and i don't suppose you want to sleep on the sofa for weeks straight?"
a sly method of getting you to sleep next to him.
also, this man is quite loaded with money. freelance chef popular in demand, but he only takes up jobs that he feels like doing. sometimes he'll leave his house empty for longer times because he's busy, which makes you quite lonely and confused, since he doesn't really explain to you where he's going and why a lot of the time.
when he eventually is back again, he is met with you, holding the scent of some other alpha. he finds himself feeling incredibly upset and possessive, even though he's always deemed relationships to be superficial in his life, because it limits his freedom. but he just feels so deeply unhappy about it that he ends up arguing with you
he knows it shouldn't be something he is entitled to feel angry about when he's not even properly committed to you but it's not like he's ever mingled with other omegas ever since he's met you? it just felt so unfair to him in the moment.
shortly after the argument, you end up confessing you didn't even do anything with the alpha anyway, just a boring date and one quick hug. and sukuna also explains that it was his fault in the first place, leaving and coming back without saying anything. turns out that he sometimes works as a chef in places like hotels and when he's preparing food for companies or people who live a distance away, he just spends the nights somewhere nearby for convenience.
the tension is high after both of you are finished clearing things up, and it eventually leads to sex again. he wants to get rid of that scent ASAP, whether it was from just a hug or not, he needs it GONE. and this time, he properly marks you, sinking his fangs into your scent glands like he's always ached to do.
the night ends with you two officially becoming a couple, finally haha, happy days
the end
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