#and my experiences as a queer person

[devilbimboy]

i hate it when people in the lgbtq+ community put weird categories on queerness, like there’s a set way to be, and dismiss people entirely whenever they see unfit.

i need them to remember that no matter what some boydyke or xenogender with whatever pronouns he-she go by such labels and live their lives, you will all still get the spit of a queerphobe on your face and stern, disgusted looks from down the street.

You will all still sit in front of your phones seeing piling videos of news clips saying your rights will be stripped away.

you will all still get beaten with the same shades of black and blue when some bigoted cops drives up to the gay bar you regular at

That bar became a second home to you, and the person you oh so isolate from your ideal form of a queer person has their head laying on top of the island half-drunk.

[miitopia-cake]

I wish some aces would stop excluding other aces with complex sexual experiences. like I get why but you have to realize that being ace does not mean they don't enjoy sexual experiences and it's weird when you complain about allo people and boil it down to "people who have sexual experiences" and also shame people for their sex life and kinks as if your own community doesnt INCLUDE those people. because there are other aces out there who still masturbate, who feel sexually attracted to their own body, who barely experiences sexual attraction but still enjoys sex, who like consuming sexual media, who like sfw kink. being ace is so so much more complex than just "disliking sex". and also aromantic exclusionism in the same genre of posts is something i see a lot. especially aro allos. I hate hate hate seeing a community that SHOULD be inclusive boil down sexuality and exclude people.

[laurellala]

Fun fact! This was the real tipping point that made Edgeworth run away after AA1, they just couldn't show it on screen because they didn't have the rights to Chappell Roan's music <3

(A spiritual successor to my "Hot to Go" joke from this post. Image description under the cut below)

[Image ID: a four page black and white comic of characters from ace attorney.

The Judge stands solemnly at his podium holding a gavel "Mr. Miles Edgeworth, you are on trial for the murder of blah blah blah..."

A cheerful Maya Fey leans over to Miles Edgeworth, who is staring straight ahead and looking very concerned

Maya: "Psst! Mr. Edgeworth! If you win your trial, can I show you Chappell Roan?

Miles: "What the hell, sure." Internally he thinks "Oh God I am going to jail"

A box saying "later" in the top corner of the next panel marks the passage of time.

The Judge smiles as he says "I declare you... Not Guilty!"

We see a full body shot of Maya dancing excitedly while Miles looks on, emotionless

Maya: YIPPEE omg you're going to LOVE this

Miles internally thinks "oh no, the consequences of my actions.

We see Miles standing in between Phoenix Wright and Maya looking apprehensive. Maya beams in excitement, while Nick puts a reassuring hand on Miles' shoulder

Miles: Alright, so what is this exactly?

Nick: She's a pop musician Maya really likes

Maya: You promised you'd let me show you, and it's legally binding because you said it in a court room!

Miles: That is not how the law works Ms. Fey

Maya: Shh just listen!

We see a panel of Miles' pensive face concentrating as he listens to "Hot to Go". He thinks to himself "hm".

Another panel zoomed in more. His pensive expression has grown more tense/confused as he listens to "Red Wine Supernova". he again thinks to himself "Hm" in a larger thought bubble.

We zoom out again to see Nick, Miles, and Maya standing together again. Miles stares forward blankly, eyebrows raised. Maya excitedly leans in.

Maya: Ok, that's her whole discography. So! What did you think?

Nick looks at him, waiting for his response

We get a panel of Miles, looking bewildered. He starts to speak "I..."

We cut again to see the three of them standing together.

Miles: I... don't think I like women?

Miles looks shocked and confused. Nick is bent over laughing, using a hand on Miles's shoulder to support himself. Maya looks outraged and appalled!

Maya: MR. EDGEWORTH! Just because you don' like her musi it doesn't give you an excuse to be sexist!

We see a panel of Miles looking stressed and confused. He leans his head on one of his hands, which messes up his hair, showing how he isn't his normal put together self.

Miles: I should rephrase that. What I mean is, Ms. Roan is clearly VERY assured in her feelings towards women. I was... unaware that anyone felt that strongly. I thought we all viewed these things with a vague sense of distaste and unease but collectively ignored it. Like how we do with climate change.

We zoom out again to see the three of them. Miles stands in the middle looking deeply uncomfortable and lost in thought, vibrating with unease. Nick and Maya exchange deeply concerned glances across from him.

With lingering unease, Miles begins to walk away.

Miles: Well, I should be going then. Goodnight.

Nick hesitantly raises a finger to point out an inaccuracy in that statement

Nick: It's four in the afternoon-

he gets interrupted by Miles who repeats firmly: I said Goodnight

Nick looks in the direction Miles walked off in.

Nick: ...He'll be ok, right?

Maya reassures him: Of cours Nick! I mean, what's the worst that can happen?

Jump cut to a closeup of Nick's hand holding Miles' letter which reads Miles Edgeworth chooses death in all caps. Then, below in smaller font, it says Also femininomenon was really good, thanks.

We see a panel of Nick glaring wordlessly at Maya as he holds the letter in his hand. Maya leans against the wall and looks away, whistling, trying to look innocent to avoid blame.

As a bonus, we also have a page that takes place a year later. Miles and Nick stand talking. Miles looks calmer now, and Nick smiles encouragingly.

Miles: In my time in Europe, I've been examining myself and my approach to law. Ultimately, the most important focus must be justice. We owe it to ourselves and to the people we serve

Nick: Wow, that's really inspiring Edgeworth. And, uh, hows the... the other thing going?

We get a zoomed in panel of Miles glaring menacingly at a suddenly nervous Nick

Jumping out again, Miles turns his back to Nick as he continues to talk

Miles: So as I was saying, justice is truly so important...

Nick nervously rubs the back of his neck wearing an awkward expression as he sweats nervously. He thinks to himself internally "Ooookay then, clearly still working through some things there"

/.End ID]

[redysetdare]

I think i just need to express that the culture surrounding QPRs right now made me think that i couldn't have strong bonds with my friends. Society told me i cant have strong bonds with friends because that was only for romantic relationships. Then i went into aro spaces and this idea was reinforced using QPRs instead of romantic relationships. it was "You can still have strong bonds with people without romance! It can just be a QPR instead!" "QPRs are MORE than friendship so you can have STRONGER BONDS than you would with friends."

it made me think that the relationships i wanted with my friends HAD to be something other than friendship for it to be as strong as i wanted. If i wanted to be the first person in someones life i had to enter some sort of committed relationship. if I wanted someone to care about me as strongly as i did them then it would have to be a relationship that was "more" than friendship.

I thought I wanted a QPR because i was told the only way to get that care and security that I wanted was to enter into a relationship that was "more" than friendship. because friends didn't care that much. because friends didn't live together their entire lives. because friends were never the priority relationship wise. and it took me years to realize that i didn't want any partnership and i shouldn't have to be in one to want these things from a friend. these things CAN be something friends can do. but i found that out on my own. because the aro community kept saying "you want a QPR" when i just wanted a friend who finally saw me as a priority in their life.

[nothorses]

hot take but I think the "we're only talking about people who identify as queer when we talk about the queer community" thing was and is one of the worst arguments in defense of the word.

I am talking about you when I say "the queer community", and "queer people", and "queer studies". I'm describing a thing that a large group of people have in common, and you share that thing in common. Your individual comfort with the word doesn't change the definition of it.

I'm sorry you don't like that word. You don't ever have to call yourself that, and you don't have to like it, and I won't ever call you that if you don't want me to.

What I am going to do, however, is decide what language I use based on A) how inclusive it is, and B) how well it communicates my point to the relevant audience.

"Inclusive" here is an important criteria; this refers to the number of people who should be included, that are included, ideally without some kind of weird hierarchy (like we see in "LGBT+" and variations). The technical definition is what we're talking about here- putting personal comfort aside, could the word "queer" describe you?

There will always be someone who doesn't like a particular word for themselves- even if it could apply. Lots of people don't like "LGBT+" (I don't really), even if it technically applies to them. You're not more important than they are.

You can identify one way on a personal level, and still understand that when we're discussing the larger community of people and the histories attached to it, you're included in that- even if you don't personally identify with the specific word we're using. Your story, your voice, and your presence matters.

Y'all need to learn to distinguish "broad term for an experience I share with others" from "personal identity label I use to describe my individual experience to others". ASAP.

[ricky-mortis]

Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending

[chaosandwolves]

There was always this frantic quality to Buck's relationships

With Abby it was.. I need to be a better man, I need to be the bigger person, I need to be understanding

With Ali it was ... I need to change something

With Taylor it was... I have to make it work

With Natalia it was... I need to be quick with this cause who knows if I'm running out of time/I need to use the lightning strike as a wake up call

And then there is Tommy

Tommy who makes the first step but then lets him breathe through it for a moment

Tommy who asks HIM out

Tommy who cares that Buck doesn't do anything he's not ready for

Yes, Buck is a little frantic with the date but

Tommy gives him room and grace and understanding

And then the coffee date!!!

For the first time we see Buck AT EASE looking at a romantic connection with someone

Is he still Buck, and moves a little head over heels? Of course he is!

But it's not cause he's desperate

It's cause he's EXCITED

He's filled with so much joy and excitement

and for the first time he has no outlined plan with a relationship, no map he's following

Instead he allows himself to discover and explore this relationship and this part of himself

He's so excited about it

So free and bright and content with it

Tommy really stopped that hamster wheel and showed him a new way and

Buck is guided by that inner light of his now, without trying to direct it

And he's not looking for what's missing, what's wrong or following a plan

He just lets himself be and experience and explore and discover

And just

The sheer joy and ease of it all

I can't!

Go, Evan, go and spread your wings and explore that joy

You deserve it so much

😭😭😭😭

[lilac-set]

Reminder: even if trump wins, we’ll be ok. The presidency isnt the only political position that matters, he wont be a dictator, the president doesnt have the power to remove every other part of government that keeps the president’s power in check. Also politics isnt the only thing that matters. Even if we lose some rights (which he cant singlehandedly do) we still have community, we still have activism, we’ll always be ok. We survived one trump presidency, we can survive another. We survived before gay marriage or transitioning were legal, if we have to survive that again we will. Please, no matter what happens, promise to stay alive. Youre valuable, youre important, and youre going to be ok. Its better to be overprepared than underprepared. Im not asking you to lose hope (im doing the opposite of that), im asking you to practice coping ahead, get all your coping skills ready, determine now to stay alive, because i dont want any of you to make any rash decisions later in case we get bad news and emotions are high. Make a safety plan if you need to. Make sure you’re gonna be ok

[romanticize-until-you-drop]

Just raised my hand and asked my first question in a seminar!! Killing my social anxiety one step at a time…

[badgermcghee]

happy pride month to all the loveless folks out there who will have to see the love is love slogan everywhere this month. no love is also a queer experience of love and you are just as important in this community as anyone.

[odd-chips]

Tim's First Pride! 🌈 ✨

I think he would be a little uncomfortable in the beginning, but he'd be very glad he went!!

Bonus sketch of a post-Pride Tim featuring his sister, Josephine, who pushed him to attend in the first place (and another sketch of accidentally bumping into a familiar face):

[sophsun1]

Queer as Folk – 4.13: Proposal of Two Kinds

[shalom-iamcominghome]

It's weird being simultaneously jewish and non-jewish at the exact same time. Because to non-jews, I am jewish. They see someone like me, and they don't typically care about the intricacies of jewish thought and law - they only see a jew, and they react accordingly. This isn't malicious on their end, I think, it's just a consequence of not being jewish or having people close to you who are. But to jews, they know that I'm not jewish yet, correctly so I may add, and I'm treated as such.

I'm not complaining about being treated as jewish or not being treated as jewish, but I'm saying it's a weird tug-of-war where I simultaneously am and am not. I don't compromise on where I am visibly associated with jews, and as a consequence, I'm treated as a jew for good and bad. I want that, though. Even when I have been terrified of being visibly associated with jews, I wouldn't abandon it.

[not-that-debonair]

This is personal but it’s something I really don’t see talked about.

Being aroace and realising you potentially want kids in the future can feel so incredibly daunting. It can feel like two aspects of you that just can’t coexist practically as there is no precedent there.

Not wanting a partner in the future obviously makes ‘standard’ conception a bit difficult but also basically bars you from adopting (at least where I live). And alternative methods of conception come with their own multitude of challenges.

And then there’s the feeling that you’d never be able to do it on your own. Single parenting carries its own social stigma, regardless of the situation that leads to it. There’s an unjustified but unfortunately still present feeling; Are you being selfish? Would it be unfair? And not to mention what family (or anyone else) would say about you choosing to raise a kid alone. You know it shouldn’t matter but it does.

It also feels difficult to reconcile it with your identity, even if that sounds strange. Wanting kids is so scarcely mentioned in aro/ace circles. It goes against the ‘happy on my own’ narrative. Having kids is implied to be another aspect of the amatonormative culture that we reject. But that isn’t always the case.

I don’t really have a conclusion to this, I just wanted to get some thoughts out. It’s quite personal and it’s late at night so things may not be worded perfectly. That said, I welcome any other perspectives on the topic.

[griem]

ijbol idk man releasing screenshots of very polarizing things said in a private discord server between friends in a public "callout" post is #the most #tumblrific thing ive ever seen LOL.

#opinion 😱 in tags

[noa-ciharu]

One of the things noone talks about about growing up as queer in extremely queer-phobic society is how it can damage your ability to connect to people on deeper/emotional level. Because friendships are all fine and dandy, but when you get too close to someone questions of who you like would inevitably come up. We live in cisnormative heteronormative society after all

And kids/teens aren't stupid, they can tell something is off. So whenever difficult questions come up you either have option to lie or tell the truth and pray 1:9 chances are in your favor and your "friend" isn't queerphobic and won't tell you to seek therapy. And even if by some miracle they aren't, they'd still avoid talking about your sexuality/gender experiences because deep down it does makes them uncomfortable. That's closest to accepted you've felt irl, so you keep quiet

At school you hear peers talking about hanging out after school; open hanging out, everyone's invited. When school bell rings you're packing stuff and going right home