#but I’d love to be in a close relationship with someone with a complicated connection with gender

[devilbimboy]

i hate it when people in the lgbtq+ community put weird categories on queerness, like there’s a set way to be, and dismiss people entirely whenever they see unfit.

i need them to remember that no matter what some boydyke or xenogender with whatever pronouns he-she go by such labels and live their lives, you will all still get the spit of a queerphobe on your face and stern, disgusted looks from down the street.

You will all still sit in front of your phones seeing piling videos of news clips saying your rights will be stripped away.

you will all still get beaten with the same shades of black and blue when some bigoted cops drives up to the gay bar you regular at

That bar became a second home to you, and the person you oh so isolate from your ideal form of a queer person has their head laying on top of the island half-drunk.

[stitched-mouth]

TALK TO ME SPOILERS

Just watched Talk To Me, loved it. First horror movie in a while that actually scared me, that being said though it was VERY predictable.

And I don’t think it needs a sequel. Like a sequel would just be telling the exact same story with different characters, not interesting. If they could make a story continuing from Mia’s perspective as a ghost I’d love it though. But that’s a nearly impossible story to write.

Also one specific thing that I loved about this movie is how using the hand and temporarily connecting to spirits is framed like drug use. It’s the new drug teens use at parties and get hooked on and I just kinda loved that connection. Although I do see some people hating it as it is very cringy to see teens using drugs at party in movies but I think it was handed very well here.

And how the end references the beginning with the dying kangaroo. Mia is heavily encouraged to put the kangaroo out of it’s misery but opts not to, and kinda cruelly leaves it dying on the side of the road. But when she is encouraged to put her close friend out of their misery, she goes for it and things end badly for her. I strongly think she did actually try to kill Riley but had no control of her body anymore and when she throw Riley onto the road, she actually threw herself. Not her opting to throw herself after being unable to kill her close friend. She didn’t chicken out this time and it ended badly for her. It makes me think the writers have an issue with putting people and animals out of their misery, especially since Riley survives this and makes a full recovery. It’s like the writers are saying even if someone is on death’s doorstep they can still very much so recover and if you try to or actually put someone out of their misery, karma will get you. I don’t really believe in this message but I like that they had a message in there that explained the dying kangaroo in the beginning.

And I loved the bad ending. I want to see more protagonists end up as ghosts in the end. I don’t know why, it’s just a cool uncommon concept. That being said, I did feel very extremely bad for Mia and kinda wished she had a better ending.

Maybe this is a controversial opinion, but I hated Jade. She turns her back on Mia so quickly and never seemed like a good friend anyway. Also she treats her brother like shit. Like girl he’s 15, if you’re going to do ‘drugs’ in front of him you don’t get to act surprised if he asked to join in. And you can’t physically stop him, like he’s 15 and I know you started doing that shit at his age. Also how she just stood by looking all sad when her boyfriend was being humiliated. No wonder why he hates you touching him. Why did the writers make Jade so unlikeable?

Also Sue, I think she was straight up abusing and neglecting those kids. Mia seemed like she was parenting both Jade and Riley in the beginning of the movie; until she started playing with ghosts and Sue has the audacity to blame Mia. Like she wasn’t the hired babysitter, she is a teenager and your daughter’s best friend why are you leaving her to parent your kids?? And acting like she’s responsible when one gets hurt?? Like Sue can be mad at Mia was partying with her kids when she made it clear she didn’t want a party but she should be mad at all the teens for being irresponsible. Not solely mad at Mia as if it was her job to keep her kids out of trouble.

Wish Max had more screen time, cause his character made NO sense. But I was real sad when he got stabbed. Like he was running to help his daughter, found her in the same way he found his wife when she died and then she stabbed him 😭😭😭😭😭 I almost started crying in the cinema. He also looked a lot like my own Dad, who I have a complicated relationship with, so his and Mia’s relationship felt so similar to me and my Dad and it hurt

I was simping for Hayley for a lot of the movie. And I’m once again questioning my sexuality thanks to them. I’m hoping to see Zoe Terakes in a lot more movies, I’ve heard they are already well known in Australia but this was my first time seeing them so again I hope to see them again. I’m really disappointed the whole movie was ban in Kuwait just because the actor is gender non conforming. We still have transphobia in 2023? Wow.

(Credit to @louxkate for the gif)

edit: just found out I’m not the only one simping for Hayley’s actor, Zoe Terakes, which makes me feel better about not understanding my sexuality.

gonna go see this movie a second time now.

[rhaenall]

Warning, this is super long but I think the reason so many people think of Shiv as the favorite is more about how "favorite" is defined and from what perspective we’re examining “favorite.”

I think there’s a pretty solid argument that, in-universe, the Roy’s generally see Shiv as Logan’s “favorite” where favorite means the child he “likes” most and treats “preferentially.” As a preface, Brian Cox has pretty consistently said Shiv is Logan's favorite in interviews. While fans and viewers are free to take or leave an actor’s extra-textual viewpoint as they wish, I think it has both been influential from a fanon perspective and provides a view into Logan’s thought process.

What I mean by that is that Logan probably thinks of Shiv as his favorite, partly because Logan's views towards Shiv are (at least initially) less complicated than his views towards his sons. As Shiv said in Episode 3x09, Logan thinks there’s something wrong with Roman and he has a dichotomous love-hate relationship with Kendall. By contrast, Logan thinks of Shiv as his little Pinky, there’s nothing competitive about the relationship because she’s not another Man coming to usurp him and he can’t comprehend the whole of her as a full and complex person due to his own misogyny. As the only girl, his relationship with her is inherently unique and, I’d argue, in some ways inherently limited by her gender. Shiv is someone he can afford to let in because she’ll never be a Son and therefore, will never really be a rival (or a disappointment as a Man).

I think we get a bit of a sense of this in Episode 2x08, where Logan seeks out Shiv’s assurance that he’s making the right decision about announcing Rhea. There’s a kind of emotional reliance there that Logan can show Shiv that I don’t think he could have really show Kendall or Roman by virtue of their being men. It’s not dissimilar to how he relies on Marcia earlier in the season. It almost gives the illusion of tenderness, but in other ways simultaneously dismisses Shiv as a potential Heir herself, even though that’s the whole paradigm she’s been operating under this season.  That reliance and psedo-emotional closeness (as well as Shiv being out of the company for the majority of her life) allows for their relationship to function differently then any relationship he has with his other children and potentially to connect with each other (see Shiv’s speech that same episode where it’s clear they really do get each other in a way).

By virtue of this unique relationship, I think the rest of the family (mostly Roman, Kendall, and Caroline) view Shiv as Logan’s “favorite” as well.  This is potentially evidenced in some of Kendall’s lines in Episode 1x02 (I say potentially because everyone is speaking from places of mixed motives haha). Thus, by certain in-universe metrics, Shiv is Logan’s favorite.

As viewers however, our view of “favorite” may differ from those of the characters in the show. If we think of Logan’s “favorite” as the child Logan lets in the most re the business, or thinks about the most, or spends the most time with, or brings into his inner circle most frequently – then the “favorite” may be Kendall.

I think it’s pretty indisputable that Logan has uniquely weird relationships with all of his kids but at least where Kendall is concerned there’s an intense kind of possessiveness involved. Putting aside how wild it is to tap a seven-year-old as the future CEO of a public company that will have a market cap in excess of $40b, Logan seems super interested in involving himself in basically every aspect of Kendall’s life. We see in the pilot episode that he’s always trying to get his kids in the company (and exercise some level of procession that way), but it extends beyond that with Kendall (see for example all of Season 2 and large parts of Season 1and 3 haha).

At least until the start of the show, I think the implication is Logan has been dedicated to molding Kendall in his image as his heir, largely without meaningful competition from his siblings. However, one of the things that I think keeps Logan from thinking of Kendall as being his “favorite” even though he holds the title of Heir, is that Kendall is a massive disappointment to Logan because he can never live up to that title. Part of this is just, no one can live up to Logan’s standard because it’s a constantly changing standard (he is after all a human gaslight) but the other part is that Kendall is, at his core, a vastly different person from Logan. They don’t think the same. And on top of that, because Kendall has been trying to absorb and learn how to be whatever it is Logan seems to want, he keeps either attempting to emulate Logan poorly because, as stated, they’re different people, or he tries to grow and do his own thing which Logan inherently dislikes either because it’s not Logan’s way or he views it as competition which is unacceptable from one of his children.

To me, in many ways, Kendall is Logan’s great contradiction – love and hate in equal measure with a toxic co-dependance swirling throughout due to the sheer amount of time and energy that’s gone into molding Ken to be more like Logan and Kendall’s desperate attempt to shove himself into a mold that doesn’t fit.

Now for how this further fits into the “favorite” discussion, I don’t think Kendall views himself as the favorite. I think this is in part because the grass is always greener and from where Ken is standing – Shiv’s pasture looks far nicer than his (and Roman’s but that’s a whole other thing). However, I also kind of think that because Kendall is so constantly in Logan’s orbit, he doesn’t really think about this favorite thing too much (or at least not in those terms).

From Shiv’s perspective though, I think she’s much more keyed into the reality that Logan’s view of her is not in fact “better” but a massive disservice to her potential and I think she does clock that there’s a connection with Kendall that she cannot be part of in a way that makes any favoritism she gets meaningless. All of which is to say, I think Shiv understands she’s in a unique position with her Dad as the girl and the baby, and that to some extent others view her as a Daddy’s Girl. But I think she also has identified that Ken is the one who’s got Daddy’s attention more than not and although she may be called the “favorite” in many ways, Ken gets to “matter” in a way she can’t.

 So all of this to say…I think Shiv is technically the “favorite” but that Kendall is practically the “favorite” or the one who “matters– it’s all about how you define it and which perspectives you’re adopting.

(Also, one final note on Logan’s feeling around Shiv – there’s also probably some deeply mixed-up subconscious association between Rose, the younger sister he lost and carried guilt about for forever, and Shiv, his only daughter (and the only child that seems to physically take after his side of the family) that may also be at play here. I’m still kind of thinking through how all of that fits together…)

WHO SEND THIS?€;&::&&: (/positive)

I appreciate it, I read it all. Really lovely thoughts and ideas.

I didn’t know about Brian Cox’s thoughts on this matter. I think I am only aware of Jeremy’s and Sarah Snook’ thoughts on their characters/season 4.

But yes I can definitely see why there is conflicting answers about the favorite.

Thank you, anon! This is Appreciated

[killervelveteenrabbit]

Miraculous Season 6 Speculation

I pulled up this post I made after the season 4 finale to see how close I came with my predictions about season 5. Despite getting pretty much everything wrong, I did nail a few things:

Gabriel was unable to handle the power of all the Miraculous, at least at first

Felix used his control over sentibeings to target Gabriel (although notably not Adrien, whom he was trying to save if anything)

Alya regained the Fox Miraculous (admittedly in the last ep and alongside all the other previous holders)

Marinette fell in love with Chat Noir, complicating her feelings for Adrien

Luka was placed in an impossible position because he knows too much

Natalie's health declined to the point of incapacitation (although I didn’t anticipate the same with Gabriel)

Chloe and Lila established an alliance that ultimately went south

I admit most of these predictions were obvious and easily anticipated. I’d rather not embarrass myself by going too far inside M. Astruc’s head, but I can’t help speculating about what the next season holds.

Hence, I’d like to suggest a few plot threads I anticipate showing up during season 6:

~~~

Everyone assumed Cerise would be the new antagonist, using the Butterfly Miraculous to further her vendetta against Marinette and/or seize the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous to forge a wish of her own. But Cerise’s panic in the last seconds of the ep suggests she’s encountered a powerful force she can’t control. This is the new enemy, although Cerise will become its servant and vessel if it means fulfilling her revenge.

This entity will be far more dangerous than Gabriel ever was, unbound by human emotion or empathy. It will be capable of neutralizing and even possessing the new and inexperienced Miraculous holders, forcing Ladybug to create a new power-up.

Who or what exactly is it? It will either be connected to Nooroo, driven insane by a damaged Miraculous, or Tomoe Tsurugi, the only player in Gabriel’s “Perfect Alliance” gambit who didn’t get anything she wanted.

~~~

Other plot points ripe for exploration:

Adrien and Marinette’s romance is plagued by lingering feelings of attraction for Ladybug and Chat Noir, respectively. They break up over it for at least one episode because one of them suspects there’s “someone else”. One of them gets possessed over it. However, Adrinette comes back stronger than ever, reinforced by better communication, more trust, and the realization that the other one isn’t perfect and that’s okay.

One of the other couples also breaks up or gets in an argument, again for only one episode and also involving possession.

Almost everyone believes Gabriel died a hero—except for Marinette, Felix, Kagami, Nathalie, and Amelie. One of them (and you all know which one) accidentally lets the butterfly out of the bag. Angst and drama ensue.

Amelie moves into Maison Agreste as Adrien’s legal guardian. It gives Adrien and Felix the chance to rebuild their relationship as cousins and friends. But certain members of the MiracuClass still don’t completely trust Felix. It causes problems when they realize he’s Argos.

The new Miraculous holders don’t know what the hell they’re doing and make all kinds of mistakes. They use their powers for selfish reasons, and LB and CN must save them from their own messes. They swap Miraculous without even telling Ladybug. They keep revealing their secret identities to each other. They upset, misplace, or lose control of their Kwamis. They get possessed by the new antagonist and use their Miraculous powers against Ladybug and Chat Noir. If Luka teaches any of them Mirakung Fu, someone's gonna kick one of their best friends in the face. Marinette briefly considers taking all the Miraculous back until an attack on her personally confirms she had the right idea. She starts relying more on Chat Noir as a mentor, and occasionally an enforcer, for the other holders.

Cerise joins the MiracuClass at the new school Miss Bustier created. Marinette’s the only one who recognizes Cerise as Lila, but everyone else thinks Marinette is nuts.

Chloe returns to Paris mid-season, discarded by her mother and with nowhere else to go. Andre reluctantly takes her in, and it turns out she learned nothing—she blames Ladybug for everything that went wrong in her life and will stop at nothing to get revenge. She may enroll at Marinette’s school in disguise and forge an alliance with Cerise, not realizing she herself is Lila in disguise, to “get” Marinette.

Sabrina and Marc’s mutual love of soccer leads the former to develop a crush on the latter. It ends well for no one.

And finally, Luka gets his own love interest, if only because he damn well deserves it.

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

I don’t understand how other aces and aros feel like they aren’t going to be alone for the rest of their lives.

Like I’m ace, but I don’t have any family left and I don’t want kids and haven’t for a long time, but I’m not even 30. And it’s just so hard to think that all I’ll have is friends for the rest of my life. Not that friends aren’t important or great, but that societally, I don’t have any “concrete connections” and I likely won’t. I’d love like a qpr, but those are hard to find too.

I think it depends a lot on the kind of situation you're in. So things like living situation, family situation, social group situation, work situation, etc. And just what kind of people you have around you. We do live in a society with a very heavy focus on nuclear family being the proper way to live. And it can feel like that's the only path out if you're feeling lonely or isolated. But in real life humans are just a lot more complicated than that and there are other types of communities and other ways to form strong connections.

One piece of advice I like to give for people who are feeling isolated, or want stronger connections to other people, is to put yourself in a situation where you are around the same people regularly. Bonds and closeness for the most part are created through regular contact and familiarity, and often the people in our lives who we're closest to are people we've just straight up spent a lot of time with. Putting a focus on communities can help too, most large enough towns/cities have queer communities, hobby communities, language communities, cultural communities, etc. Online communities are good too, and accessible to anyone with a good enough Internet connection. Finding community can help someone feel like they belong and have people they can lean on if they need it.

And if things aren't working out with one group, try another. Not everyone will get along (this is why ex-roommates are often either really close friends or people we no longer talk to).

Also look for people who aren't prioritizing romantic relationships above everything else and prioritize and care a lot about platonic and non-familial connections. They do exist, and the older you get they easier they are to find. They're also more likely to be found in community focused spaces.

I do get what you're saying, Anon. Friends are such a broadly used term, but they're not always those really concrete dependable connections we want. And having a friend group and having a community can be different things. But I think changing that focus can help, and you're definitely not the only one looking for this kind of thing. Even outside of ace/aro circles.

All the best, and good luck!

[criminalmutantsins]

Sylki Rewrite

(Note: Although I don’t like Sylki, I don’t have a problem with anyone who ships them.) Warning: Internalized Homophobia Mention

Two weeks ago, I binged the Loki series. To put it shortly, I loved it! Loki has one of the best character development I’ve ever seen. He moved past his insecurities and realized what he truly wanted- to be loved and seen. The time aspect was easy to digest and didn’t complicate or overinflate the concept too much. I loved the new characters, especially Mobius and O.B. Mobius and Loki’s chemistry was amazing and so natural, which makes sense since Mobius was his first friend. O.B. was lovable and so nerdy. I hope they both return to future projects. Though I didn’t connect with her as much, B-15 was a good addition, and would be happy to see her return. When it comes to Sylvie, I'm mixed with her. She’s well-written for the most part, but I didn’t like the Sylki romance in S1, and her attitude got irritating in S2 (I'll most likely write a separate post on it). Alongside thinking Loki being attracted to a version of himself is weird, their romance felt rushed and unnatural. I couldn’t really see Loki being attracted to/like/in love with someone that quickly and Sylvie looked like she barely tolerated him, even in the second season. Honestly, I think this romance was pushed by Disney instead of the writers, mainly because there was a moment in Episode 4 where Mobius rants about how strange the attraction was. I’d like to think that was the writers calling out Disney for how weird this idea was. I would’ve liked it more if Loki and Sylvie had a sibling-like relationship. I would’ve written it where Loki feels protective of Sylvie because he sees a bit of himself in her such as his anger, loneliness, and wish to belong somewhere. But, he also respects her because she lived alone and in survival mode, teaching herself how to use magic and escape death. In turn, Sylvie sort of resents Loki, especially when he mentions his relationship with Frigga, since he lived in Asgard and had a family while she lived alone and in fear. I would have a scene where Sylvie lashes out at him (maybe when he accidentally breaks the Tempad), calling him a fool for taking his family’s love for granted. On the other hand, Loki snapped and said how she had the chance to be her true self while Loki lived under Thor’s shadow and Asgard’s expectations. Maybe go as far as to mention how he felt he had to hide his bisexuality and genderfluidity out of fear of not being accepted. By the end of the argument, both realize how their pain does not absolve others and that there is good and bad in their lives. Other than the kiss scene, the scene with Loki trying to stop Sylvie from killing He Who Remains was great. 

I was so glad S2 left the ship behind. It was one of the reasons why I think S2 is a big improvement. I can’t really describe their relationship since there are moments when they get along but there are others when Sylvie is really standoffish and doesn't seem to like Loki. Maybe the closest description would be bickering siblings, which is close to what I wanted.

Did anyone else get nervous that there would be a Sylki kiss in the S2 finale? I was, especially when he was trying to stop her from killing HWR again. If they did, it would've messed with my enjoyment since there was no indication in previous episodes that they were continuing the romance. Thankfully, they didn't and the finale was perfect, even if it broke my heart that Loki will live alone for as long as he's alive. I wanted him to be happy with everyone.

[tabby-shieldmaiden]

Carnival of Aros June 2023: My Future

This is a piece I wrote for the June 2023 Carnival of Aros, themed around being aromantic in an allonormative world.

CW: this piece will briefly discuss the fact that we live in a queerphobic world, and that anti-autistic ableism is a risk that autistic people may face when entering intimate relationships. It’s all only short mentions, but they’re there.

Carnival of Aros June 2023: My Future

At twenty years old, I will hopefully have a lot more life left to live. Presently, I am thinking about the sort of future I would like to build for myself. Where would I see myself in ten years time, twenty, or even thirty and beyond? Where would I end up? What sort of relationships would I find myself in?

I know roughly what sort of work I would like to try and do. The future is uncertain, but I do hope to fight and push for a better one. But then the question comes to where I see myself in my personal life. And then, that’s when I realise I don’t really have a very good answer. 

In my country, one can only apply for single home ownership once one reaches the age of thirty-five. If not, you can only apply for a home if you are doing it with your biological family, if you are widowed, if you are orphaned, or if you are married. The government is pushing more pro-natal policies in the hopes of bringing up the birth rate. And of course, to a conservative culture like this, that means encouraging as many young people to pair up and marry as soon as possible, and pump out as many children as possible (so long as you can afford it, they would caveat). 

Well, I guess that’s all fine and good, if that’s the life you would want. But, truthfully, it’s not a life for me. 

I don’t think it was ever easy for me to imagine myself as a wife. I’d thought about sex, and I’d thought about a wedding, and I’d entertained the thought of being a mother before. But being a wife? It just… doesn’t seem like a life for me. Since losing connection with the religiosity of my upbringing, connecting with my aromanticism, and thinking more and more about what I would like out of life. Marriage as a lifestyle, if I were to realistically think about it, seems less and less like something I would need out of my life. 

If I were to choose an ideal form of emotional support, one which I would like to give and receive, it would be in the form of a close, tight-knit network of many different friends. All of whom I’m emotionally close with, whom I get to fulfil different emotional needs with. It’s something that still doesn’t seem quite realistic in the world we currently live in though. Where would we all live? Would our families all approve? Would we be able to hold together as a group? Will I be able to find people who want the same things I do? Especially when so many people seem to desire a heterosexual, heteromantic, monogamous marriage. Who could dedicate the same level of emotional support one gives their family or their spouse to their unmarried friend? In the world we live in today, that doesn’t seem to be likely. 

And I could go a conventional route. Find a guy to marry out of convenience. Except… this doesn’t seem fair. There would be a certain type of love that I would be expected to return. A type of love which I fear I don’t have in me to feel or express to another. And it would be hard to find other aromantics. Queerness of any kind isn’t readily embraced by many of the people of this country. Few people would know about aromanticism. As an autistic woman, I already know how risky it is with entering a romantic relationship with someone who does not understand what you are. Someone who would expect you to conform to a certain image, and who may resent you for failing to fulfil that image. I’ve heard the stories, I know the fear. Aromanticism will inevitably complicate matters.

As it is, I nevertheless feel myself inevitably being pushed in the direction of some form of monogamous straight relationship. It may be the fear of being alone forever. It may be the fear of having no one to look after me, should anything happen to me in the future. It may be the fear of being perceived as immature. Mostly though, it may be because when so many forces of society wish for someone to be a certain way, sometimes they give up, and they take the path of least resistance. It’s a wimpy response, but it’s one I sometimes wonder if I will fall into. Sometimes, I wonder if I will really, truly, give up and settle.

It is difficult to push back against the tide, especially when it feels like you’re going at it alone. 

I don’t have very many hopeful thoughts pertaining to my future relationships, or of getting the sort of emotional intimacy I hope to get. Maybe I could fight. Maybe I could work towards a better future. For all queer people, for the next generation. Maybe things would be better for the people of the future.

But for now, it is what it is. I don’t know where my future is headed. But if there is a spark of hope I can hold onto, I certainly wish that that hope will find some way to materialise. 

[just-absolutely-super]

Reassurance

Happy Valentine's Day!

A MegaMan x Roll oneshot I wrote because I love them. I hope you all enjoy it!

Summary: MegaMan doesn't have to worry about hiding his secret from Lan anymore, but now he has another dilemma on his hands: how does Roll feel about him being Hub Hikari? [Post-MMBN1; MegaRoll established relationship]

Pairing: MegaMan.EXE x Roll.EXE

Rating: K

Read it on AO3 /// FF.net

MegaMan typed onto his keyboard, eyes reading over each word as he checked and double checked that there weren't any errors. Normally he wouldn't put so much care into compositing a message to someone he was close with, but this was a particularly special occurrence…and for a special person in his life.

"What's got you so concentrated?"

MegaMan jumped, not expecting to hear the sudden noise of his operator. Turning around quickly, he came face to face with Lan.

"Oh, uh, nothing! I was just writing some mail to Roll, that's all…" the Navi replied. He was desperately trying to appear nonchalant, but seeing Lan's disbelieving look told MegaMan there was no fooling his brother.

Brother…

It had been a couple of weeks since that particular cat got out of the bag. Even though life returned to a sense of normalcy, MegaMan knew better that things were far from normal.

No, Lan didn't treat him any differently—and MegaMan didn't want him to—but he knew that things between them weren't the same. Lan looked at him with new eyes. Gone was the illusion that MegaMan was just a specialized program his father created for research purposes; now he could see him for who he truly was: Hub Hikari, a child thought lost to death but was digitized into a NetNavi.

It was a relief to finally quit hiding the truth from Lan. Before the reveal, MegaMan would often be anxious of how his twin would react to the news. Would he take it terribly? Would he feel betrayed by his family? Would he not care? Thankfully, the truth of the matter was that Lan was ecstatic to learn who he was, and was interested to continue learning everything there was to know about his brother.

And that was great! Megaman was happy.

Although…there was another matter he had yet to address. One that did not involve his twin this time…

Lan pulled MegaMan from his thoughts by speaking, "Why are you getting so nervous over mailing Roll? Don't you two do that, like, all the time?"

Megaman felt his cheeks flush, "Well, yeah. I mean, usually we do…but lately we haven't really had time to talk, so I figured I'd ask her to hang out for a little bit on the net together. Is… Is that okay?"

Lan raised an eyebrow, "MegaMan, I'm not your parent. You don't need my permission to see your girlfriend."

The blue Navi's cheeks burned brighter at the use of the word, "girlfriend". While it's true he and Roll were close, they never really put a label to it. Dating among NetNavis wasn't a particularly common thing given that human emotions like love and romance were far more complicated for their programming to grasp.

But given that MegaMan wasn't completely computer, it was far easier for him to develop these feelings. And given how nice and supportive and…well, pretty Roll was, it wasn't hard to believe he had developed an infatuation for her. What was shocking was when Roll admitted she felt an attraction towards him!

So…technically speaking, they were dating (that was the term Mayl first used when Lan asked why Roll kept "bothering" MegaMan all those months ago), but if he were honest, MegaMan felt there weren't any words to describe just what he feels for the female Navi. To him, it felt like a larger connection. Terms like "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" were just easier to say though, so the two allowed it.

But how they came to be together and the labeling of it all didn't matter during this moment. What mattered was the fact that ever since WWW had been taken care of, MegaMan did not have any time dedicated to Roll at all.

It wasn't on purpose, though—and it wasn't like they didn't see each other. They mostly hung out in their large friend group with GutsMan and Glyde. So while they were together, they weren't given the luxury of alone time. He could tell during those moments that Roll was slightly upset at not having him all to herself, but there was nothing he could do. Things post WWW were hectic for him, personally.

There was the fact that MegaMan was trying to get adjusted to the newly installed program. Dad needed to make sure that his and Lan's synchronization wasn't going to have unwarranted side effects thanks to the program, and that required a lot of time and visits to SciLab. Not to mention trying to readjust to life overall after saving the world from the LifeVirus, including reestablishing his relationship with Lan as not just his NetNavi, but his twin brother as well.

Which led to another reason for why MegaMan had not been seeing Roll as often…how did she feel about his little secret?

Roll had been present during his fight with MagicMan. She had held him while he was on the verge of deletion at the WWW Navi's hands. Of course she heard the conversation that followed when his father called to tell Lan that MegaMan and Hub Hikari were one and the same.

She didn't say anything back then, probably because she was still emotional over almost losing him, but nonetheless it was a large topic that he had been avoiding discussing with her. It's not something he's proud of, he hated feeling like a coward. And now that so much time has passed, he was beginning to feel similar insecurities he had experienced when thinking of Lan's reaction.

Would Roll be angry he never told her?

Was she hurt he hadn't come to talk to her in all this time?

Would she feel differently about him now that she knew he was partially human?

Would she break up with him?

MegaMan groaned. Why were relationships so hard?

"Yikes, why are you so down about this? Did you have a fight or something?"

MegaMan escaped his dark thoughts as he looked at Lan's concerned face.

"No, it's not that. I just…" he bit his lip, "I don't know how she feels about all this. Me being…well, me."

"You mean how you're Hub?" Lan asked, trying to understand his brother's quandary.

"Yeah," MegaMan confirmed. "It's a big thing, you know? We haven't had any time to talk about it. I just don't know if she's adjusting well."

Lan hummed, "Has she been acting differently around you when you hang out with everyone else?"

"Well, no, but that's with everyone else," MegaMan admitted.

He remembered his father requesting of Mayl and Chaud to not mention MegaMan's identity to anyone. There weren't any guarantees that everyone else would be as accepting of turning a child on the brink of death into a NetNavi. Lan assured MegMan that one day they would tell Dex, Yai, and their Navis; but for now, they had to hold onto the secret a little longer.

This left Roll pretending everything was normal in the presence of others. While he was relieved she would never betray his trust, the blue Navi didn't have any reassurance of her behavior without friends eavesdropping…

"How is it going to be if it's just me and her alone?" he softly asked.

Lan was quiet for a minute, seeming to contemplate the conversation. Finally, he nodded to himself and with the confidence only a child his age could have, said, "I don't think you have anything to worry about."

"I don't?" the elder twin asked, confused.

"Nope!" the younger twin replied, "Roll likes you a lot, Hub. If there's anyone who can accept you for who you are, bet that it's her. Trust me on this!"

MegaMan smiled. He always liked hearing Lan's pep talks. There was something about the 11-year-old's spirit and upbeat attitude that was infectious.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"What do you mean 'probably'? I know I'm right!"

Megaman laughed at the pout his twin was giving him, but sobered up quickly when he remembered that he still had to actually talk to Roll.

He turned back to the email, once again looking over the words he had typed, "Even so, it's better to get it out of the way and find out for sure how she feels about all of this."

After one more thorough read of the message, he hovered his finger over the send button. Turning back to Lan, he hesitantly asked, "You'll be okay if I go out for a bit, right?"

Lan rolled his eyes, "Please, you're only going to be a few feet from the PC, not all the way in Netopia! I'll be fine, go see your girlfriend!"

"Well, okay…but maybe I should think a little more about what I'm going to say before—"

"Ugh, fine, I'll do it."

With a quick and steady hand, Lan took his mouse and pressed the "SEND" button before his brother could come up with more ways to stall leaving the PC. MegaMan gaped at the space where his email once occupied and turned to glare at his brother. Lan, in his typical carefree fashion, ignored his ire.

"Now we wait." The younger Hikari said as he reclined back in his chair, arms behind his head casually and a large, teasing grin on his face.

"You are unbelievable…" The elder grumbled.

Fortunately, it didn't take long for them to hear the "PING" of the notification for new mail. Making sure Lan wasn't going to read it over his shoulder, MegaMan checked the contents and let out a breath he didn't realizing he was holding.

"Well?" Lan asked, tone almost eager.

"Mayl gave her the okay to go, so she'll be on her way soon," MegaMan replied, nerves coming back into his stomach with a vengeance.

"Awesome! So I guess I'll see you later tonight then?"

MegaMan rolled his eyes, "I won't be gone too long, don't worry. In the meantime, don't you have homework you should be doing?"

Lan winced, "Aw man, I was hoping you had forgotten about that."

"Of course not," MegaMan scoffed before turning to face his brother completely. With one hand on his hip and the other pointing at Lan through the screen, the Navi commanded sternly, "You better have it done when I get back, okay mister?"

Lan sighed in annoyance but raised an arm in a mock salute, "Yes, sir! I'll have it all done by the time you're done with your date, Megaman, sir!"

"Right…" MegaMan deadpanned. Despite Lan's show of reluctance, he could tell he was honest. Satisfied, he waved his hand toward his NetOp and logged himself out of the PC and onto the internet. He hoped all went well tonight…

---------

Much to his great relief, ACDC Area 1 was pretty barren this evening. There weren't even many viruses loitering about, save for a few Mettaur. They were harmless though, not even giving the blue Navi a second glance as they strolled on their way to a different part of the area.

MegaMan sighed. He hadn't been waiting long—only a few minutes at most—but he could not dispel his anxiety. He knew talking to Roll had to happen. Communication was key to a healthy relationship after all…or at least that's what the talk shows his mother watched during the day said. But nonetheless there was truth in that statement, and if he wanted things to continue with Roll he had to clear the air and discuss the current situation and how this could potentially change things between them.

Now if only she would show up.

He was standing on a large platform, a typical spot in the area that he and his friends often met at. It was the most ideal place to meet with his girlfriend. Craning his head in all directions, he confirmed that she still wasn't in sight—no one was, actually. Thinking it safe, he reached up and removed his helmet, allowing his natural brown hair to flow freely before combing it with his fingers. It was a nervous habit of his, but it did help to calm him in a way. He closed his eyes as he continued the soothing action…

"Oh! You have actual hair! Is it as soft as it looks?"

MegaMan jumped, not having noticed the arrival of his companion. Turning around, he saw Roll leaning slightly into him as she observed his brown locks, her green eyes shining with curiosity.

He found her really cute right now.

Blushing, MegMan quickly slammed his helmet back onto his head, hiding the physical feature that was proof of his existence as Hub Hikari. The pink Navi pouted at the action.

"Aww, you didn't have to do that. I think it's cute." She said simply. She tried reaching her hand up to his head—possibly to take the helmet off again—but her boyfriend stepped back out of her reach. The action caused Roll to pause, hurt almost clouding her face as she stared at him in confusion.

MegaMan felt bad for giving her that expression. "I'm sorry, I just… I'm a little self-conscious about it."

It wasn't a lie.

Hearing the sincerity of his words and seeing the obvious discomfort in his demeanor, Roll nodded in understanding. The air started to feel awkward and Megman mentally berated himself. This wasn't what he had wanted to happen at all.

Trying to bring things back on track, MegaMan gestured to the edge of the platform they were standing on, "Wanna sit down?"

Roll nodded, a small smile coming back onto her face much to the blue Navi's relief. The two moved to the ledge, carefully sitting down and allowing their legs to dangle in the air. They sat there in comfortable silence, their gazes looking out into Cyberworld. There wasn't much to see, admittedly, but MegaMan didn't care. Just being in Roll's presence was enough for him. He always enjoyed the feelings she sparked in him, and he hoped she felt the same way.

Speaking of feelings.

Might as well try and get it over with…

"So, have things been going well? We haven't had a whole lot of time to talk since…y'know." He started. He thought it would be better to ease into it rather than bombard her.

The pink Navi hummed, "Yes, things have been fine. Just the same old stuff really. Mayl still does her piano lessons but she's been trying out other kinds of hobbies too. Lately it's been tennis."

MegaMan nodded, "Yeah, everything is pretty much back to normal at our house too. Though Lan keeps going on about how bored he is. I have to keep telling him that we had enough excitement to last us a lifetime."

Roll laughed and MegaMan felt more at ease. The couple then went on to talk about other things—their NetOps, their Navi friends, new battlechips that Higsby imported from some country, the group of Mettaur from the path below trying to waddle their way home, everything and nothing all at once. Conversation flowed and it all felt so natural. That's how it was with Roll, MegaMan never felt like he had to try too hard to impress her. He felt like he could just be himself and she wouldn't ask for anything more. He loved this. He loved being with her.

He honestly wasn't sure why he felt nervous about talking to her in the first place.

"I know you said everything was fine at home, but I just want to make sure… You and Lan are still good? Things haven't been awkward since what happened at the WWW base?"

Oh…now he remembered why.

Swallowing his nerves, MegaMan replied, "No, no, everything is great. Better than great, actually. I feel like we're a lot closer now since he found out that I'm… I'm…"

He felt like kicking himself. Why couldn't he say it in front of her?

"His brother?" Roll finished for him. She had a patient smile on her face, but her brows furrowed slightly. Maybe she was confused about his hesitation, but MegaMan couldn't help but worry about the possibility that her expression reflected uneasiness about the matter.

"Yeah…that."

A silence settled over them and MegaMan admonished his behavior. He needed to get a grip. Everything was fine up until this point, why was he making this a bigger deal than it should be?

"I'm happy to hear that," Roll said, trying her best to redirect the conversation, bless her heart. "Mayl and I were a little worried about you two. I mean, it was so sudden, and Lan had no idea."

"Yeah, I know." MegaMan hated thinking about the time he kept the secret. It was one of the hardest things he had to do. Trying to broach the topic with Roll about his insecurities was starting to climb up there, though.

"But I understand why you didn't tell him. It's hard to imagine, that this person you thought was dead was with you all along as a NetNavi. You never know for sure how someone will react to that. I'm happy Lan took it so well, though. You two are such a great team—it makes sense now that I know you're brothers!"

She giggled at the irony and MegaMan allowed himself a chuckle. He really did luck out with Lan. If it had happened to anyone else, who knows what would have happened.

But her words to him did give him some hope. She spoke about his human identity so casually. Like not being completely computer was a common occurrence. Maybe Lan was right, she really did accept him for who he was and he had been worrying for nothing.

"So…what about you?"

He needed to hear the reassurance from her with his own ears.

"Huh? What about me?" she asked, head tilted to the side. He couldn't help but smile at how cute she was.

"Well, what do you think of me?" he asked, gathering all the courage he had in him. "And I mean the real me. Hub Hikari me."

He held his breath as he waited for her reply. He gripped the edge of the platform. It was now or never.

Roll, on the other hand, continued to regard him with confusion. It was as if he asked her the most perplexing question ever.

"Well, that's a silly question!" Roll said, arms crossed. After a very brief moment, realization dawned on her and she asked, "Is that what's been bothering you all evening? You're afraid of what I think of you being human?"

The blue Navi winced, but sighed dejectedly and nodded his head. His eyes turned downcast as he avoided her imploring gaze. He felt shame overcome him. Here Roll was, willingly spending her time with him and acting as if nothing between them had changed, and he had to come in and question her feelings for him. Some boyfriend, huh?

He was about to apologize to her when he suddenly felt her hand on his left cheek. Gently, Roll turned his head towards her. Her bright green eyes were practically shining as she suddenly exclaimed, "Mega, I think you're amazing! I've always thought you were. It doesn't matter who you are or what you are. You could have turned out to be a virus and I still would think you're one of the best people I know. Want to know why?"

Unable to find his voce, MegaMan nodded his head again. He felt inexplicitly warm as she smiled adoringly at him. Moving her right hand from his cheek, she slipped it to the back of his head, pulling it forward so his forehead could rest against hers. With her other hand, she reached out to gently place it against MegaMan's chest where the emblem of the Hikari family was. If he still had a heart he was sure it would beat like crazy at the feel of her touch. Reflexively, he placed his right hand on top of hers, keeping it there against him.

"It's because of your soul, Mega. You have a kind soul resting inside of you. I can sense it. You're caring, compassionate, smart, and have a strong sense of justice. Not to mention cute," she winked at him, causing him to blush. Giggling at his reaction, she sobered up to continue with her speech, "As long as you remain that kind soul, the MegaMan that I know, then know that I'll always be there for you and be by your side forever."

MegaMan stared at her in awe, moved by her words. His gaze then softened, a tiny half-smile gracing his face as he mused out loud, "Forever, huh?"

Roll giggled, keeping her tone teasing, "Forever! I'm afraid you're stuck with me, so start getting used to it!"

She let out a small squeak as she felt his unoccupied hand suddenly snake its way around her waist, pulling her more against his form if that were possible—the other hand that was still holding hers to his chest now trapped between their bodies. It was her turn to blush now as she gazed into the green of his eyes. The look he was giving her… Oh, if she had a heart it would surely skip many beats!

"Forever… I like the sound of that."

The only witness to the couple's embrace was the intricate coding that made up the cyber sky.

---------

"Are you feeling better now?" Roll asked later on as the two walked hand in hand to the junction that separated the path between Lan's PC and Mayl's.

They spent a few more minutes talking and cuddling on the platform's ledge as they enjoyed the other's company, but MegaMan had to bring it to an end when he realized how late it had gotten. Lan may have promised he'd do his homework, but MegaMan knew there was never any guarantees when it came to his brother's laziness with schoolwork.

"I am. Much better thanks to you." MegaMan affirmed, lifting Roll's hand to his lips for a quick peck. He relished in watching his girlfriend try to hide her blushing face from him.

"Th-That's good," the pink Navi stuttered before clearing her throat and regaining her composure. This boy will be the end of her! "Well, this is where we part. I'll see you tomorrow in the classroom comp?"

MegaMan nodded. "Yeah, and I think Lan was planning on asking Mayl to help him study for the math test coming up. I'll definitely be seeing you then."

"Oh, studying for math? How romantic!" she said sarcastically, earning a laugh from her boyfriend. Seeing the opportunity, she then asked, "If we do meet up for that study date, can I make a request?"

The blue Navi blinked but hesitantly replied, "What kind of request?"

Roll then let go of his hand to place both of hers in a pleading position, "Can I please see you without your helmet again? Pretty please? I promise you look so cute without it!"

MegaMan's cheeks burned as he subconsciously placed a hand to his head, "R-Really? Are you sure you want to see it?"

"Definitely!" his girlfriend confirmed. "It looks so soft too! I'm gonna have so much fun playing with it."

He wasn't so sure about that…but he loved seeing Roll happy, so who was he to deny her?

"Uh, fine, I guess. If that's what you want."

"It is!" she skipped over to him and placed a quick kiss to his cheek. She gave a mischievous giggle when the red of his cheeks intensified. "I'll see you tomorrow. Bye, Hub!"

MegaMan froze at her parting words, unsure how to react. Roll noticed his change in form and frowned in concern. Fearing she made him uncomfortable, she waved her hands in worry as she began to ramble.

"S-Sorry. I just… It slipped out. I wanted to try using your real name. I won't say it again if you don't want—"

"I like it."

Roll stopped her stammers, blinking at her boyfriend as she processed what he said.

"You… You do?"

MegaMan grinned, his green eyes practically shimmering with adoration for her.

"Yeah… I do."

Roll relaxed, feeling her anxiety melt away at seeing the content expression on MegaMan's face. Leaning forward, she kissed him again, but this time on the lips.

"Goodnight…Hub."

Hub exhaled a pleased sigh. How he loved this girl.

"Goodnight, Roll."

Everything was going to be fine.

[romistav]

”if i were you i’d have all the love island therapists on hand tonight.” 

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO ABOUT REUNITING WITH THE OTHER VILLA? WHAT ARE YOU DREADING THE MOST?

”i am most looking forward to seeing josh and dylan, obviously. i have always known that i love them and i feel close to both of them but being away even just for a couple of days proved to me how much i care about them, you know? like, i miss them both so fucking much. i hope they’ve been getting along in their other villa. i’m not dreading seeing marcus, i’m not going to say that. it’s not as if things ended because we both fucking hate each other or something. i’m dreading maybe how i’ll feel but there is a bigger part of me that’s looking forward to seeing him because, yeah, i’ve missed him, too.” 

IF YOU WERE TO STICK, WHY WOULD YOU? WHY WOULD YOU CONSIDER SWITCHING?

”if i was going to stick it would be because there’s a part of me that still clings onto what i think marcus and i could have been if you guys hadn’t brought in dejan here for the specific purpose of ruining our relationship. i think everyone here is expecting me to jump back into marcus’ arms as soon as we see each other again but that’s not how any of this works. it’s a lot more complicated than that and i wish that it wasn’t. i’d consider switching, well, the most obvious answer is because i know that marcus is bringing someone back but also because i think i deserve a shot at someone who genuinely cares about me and is willing to fight for what we have together, someone who is all in with me. no backups, no questioning what other people say about us.” 

IS THERE A BOMBSHELL THAT’S AT THE TOP OF YOUR ‘LIST’? WHO WOULD YOU BRING BACK?

”dante, duh.” the grin on their face is apparent, they almost feel like they’re glowing. “i think we’ve gotten along really well since the first day and i know that maybe he isn’t the type of person my friends pictured me with but i do think we fit together pretty nicely. he makes me feel safe and, well, that means a lot to me.” 

IF NONE OF THE BOMBSHELLS COULD COME BACK, WHO WOULD YOU MISS THE MOST?

”i think i’d miss all of them except jude, if i’m being honest. angel and zeke are very fun to have around. stella i know has had a hard time being here but i think she’d have a great time being brought back. charlene, god, don’t we all love her already? she’s so much fun. her whole thing with naomi isn’t really surprising ‘cause they’re both super hot. even if all her group activities ended on a sour note, i’d miss her trying to get us all together regardless.” 

WHAT CONVERSATIONS DO YOU NEED TO HAVE MOST WHEN YOU REUNITE?

"marcus is the obvious one. that guilt has been eating away at me the whole time we’ve been here but there are also other things i’d like to say to him. things we’ve sort of touched on that i’d love to discuss further. there are also things i have to talk to dylan about, though, we had this sort of....important conversation the night before casa and i want to know where his head is at regarding everything we discussed. i don’t know that it’s, like, an important conversation i need to have with josh but i can’t fucking wait to talk to him.” 

WHAT ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THE DECISIONS OF THE OTHER ISLANDERS? WHO DO YOU THINK HAS MADE THE BEST CONNECTION?

”i’d say callie and angel have the possibility of being pretty solid and, honestly, i’m just glad to see callie having a good time with someone. i don’t know about anyone else having a solid connection or even a good connection but i’m sure angel won’t be the only bombshell coming back.” 

[chqads]

THESE MUSES ARE LOOKING FOR THEIR MISSED CONNECTIONS:

VINCE GAGLIARDI is looking for THEIR SIBLINGS (3/5). they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of ANY FITTING FC 30-40, but you must reach out to DADIISM to find out more! (vince is the oldest of the six gagliardi kids. they grew up traveling the us with their parents who told fortunes at a traveling carnival. they were homeschooled as children and grew up very close to each other. as the eldest, vince helped raise his siblings. whether or not any of the siblings are psychic can be utp, but vince did inherit the abilities and worked in carnivals growing up and still works as a psychic now, owning his own shop in town. after getting married, he settled down in denver with his wife and they started a family, though she left him after their second son was born. after their divorce, he started dating again, and after a few months of dating a woman named stella, they found out they were pregnant. his daughter was born a year ago but due to complications from the birth, his girlfriend passed away. he’s been in town for about 13 years now. how long the siblings have been in denver  can be utp, feel free to run any ideas or questions by me too! ) taken by marco gagliardi-fortier, giovanni gagilardi, bianca gagilardi 

ANGELO CORTES ESTRADA is looking for THEIR ESTRANGED SIBLINGS (0/2). they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of ANY FITTING FC (MIGUEL GOMEZ IS COLOMBIAN SO THE WC FCS SHOULD BE EITHER COLUMBIAN OR HALF COLUMBIAN IF WE WANT TO DO HALF SIBLINGS. AGES SHOULD BE BETWEEN 27-31 AND 32-36 RESPECTIVELY. SOME SUGGESTIONS WOULD BE CARLOS VALDES, ALYSSA DIAZ, DIANE GUERRERO, ISABELLA GOMEZ), but you must reach out to DADIISM to find out more! (a lot of this can be utp, but the basic information is the cortes’ grew up in los angeles. their family was very proper/well mannered but angelo wasn’t, which caused a lot of problems for them. angelo was the black sheep of the family and was kicked out when he was 18, which was when he moved to boulder. shortly after, he was involved in a drunk driving accident that resulted in the death of one person and he was sent to jail for a 20 year sentence. he was recently released and moved to denver. somehow the siblings managed to track him down and are now trying to rebuild a relationship with him.)

PHOEBE RYAN is looking for HER SIBLINGS. they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of ANYONE BETWEEN THE AGES 30-40, but you must reach out to IMPERVICUS to find out more! (+ phoebe is the oldest child out of three/four siblings, so i’d love to have her other siblings! she was very much the golden child of the family, so i’d love to explore that dynamic with some siblings who maybe didn’t get the attention she did) 

DANIEL PARK is looking for 2-3 YOUNGER SIBLINGS. they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of ANY KOREAN FCS, but you must reach out to FADEDSTARSFMS to find out more! ( Daniel has taken care of his younger siblings more than their parents did, he cares for them deeply and may or may not be a bit hovering but he’d do anything for them) taken by ophelia park

BOWIE GRAVES is looking for HER AUNT. they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of FEMALE FC BETWEEN THE AGES OF 32-35, but you must reach out to IMPERVICUS to find out more! (+ her aunt had to take her in when she was 22/25 and bowie was 14. her aunt was someone who wasn’t prepared to take a kid in, having lived a kid free lifestyle and was a bit reckless and a partier. bowie actually ended up taking care of her aunt more often than not. we can discuss more about that though for specific dynamics!)

OWEN ROBINSON ARMSTRONG is looking for THEIR BIOLOGICAL SIBLING. they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of UTP (as long as they look like they can be related to Nyle DiMarco), but you must reach out to OWENROBINSON to find out more! (Their parents died in a car crash when Owen was nine, which the kids were also in. With no other family to take them in, they were placed into Foster Care. At first the first few homes they were in, they were together until finally there were separated and put into different ones. It was the last time Owen had ever seen them. They could be younger/older than him, totally up to you.)

ELIJAH LOOMIS is looking for HIS PARENTS. they’d like the faceclaim to possibly be someone along the lines of UTP (but in mind Denzel Washington and Angela Bassett) but you must reach out to OFWISHFULTHINKING to find out more! (+ much of these muses’ life story is UTP. All that’s really set in stone is that they’re the parents of 3 children (Eli is their youngest.) As with every parent/child relationship, they have their tumultuous moments. They really wish that Eli had some sort of path in life and it can be cause for argument a lot, but when Eli’s son, Noah, was born, they were an incredible support for Eli. He knows that he can still count on them and they often help to babysit when Eli just needs a few hours to himself!)

MOBILE NAVIGATION. WANTED CONNECTIONS. APPLICATION.

[cabiba]

1. Closing Your Mind

I know way too many people who still operate with the same beliefs, patterns, and styles of thinking that they did when they were 18.

They blindly listened to authority, accepted whatever beliefs their family, friends, and society instilled in them…and never bothered to challenge any of it as they grew up.

The simple truth is that life is complicated. Infinitely so.

And no matter how fervently you believe something, there is someone else somewhere in the world with an antithetical viewpoint that is often just as valid as your own.

When you operate with a closed mind in your 20s, you never have the opportunity to formulate your own ideas. To create your own code for living and find your own answers to life’s hard questions.

And, if you create this habit in your 20s, it is MUCH harder to break later on.

Your 20s should be a time to question everything…religion, politics, life advice, your own goals, your own beliefs about the world, your own identity as a man or woman…EVERYTHING.

If you were told that “success” is getting married, having a 9–5 job with a good pension, raising a few kids and then retiring and you chose to believe that (even if, subconsciously this sounds like hell), you are setting yourself up for a life of misery.

Question everything and don’t accept anything you were told simply because mommy, daddy, a teacher, or the government told it to you.

2. Fearing Failure

Let’s just get this out of the way.

You’re going to fail. A lot. Way more than you can even imagine.

This is true of everyone.

Failure is an inevitable part of life. But most people fear it as if it’s the end of life. And, as a result, they play it safe and refuse to take bold risks or chart their own path.

The way you live in your 20s will, for better or worse, determine how you live later in life.

While it’s true that people can and do change, the chains of habit tighten with time, making it harder for you to break out of your old patterns, behaviors, and beliefs.

In your 20s you shouldn’t fear failure…you should seek it out.

The time to fail is now.

Start your business. Travel the world. Write your book. Backpack around the country.

Do whatever you truly want to do and trust that if you do fail (and you probably will) you can recover.

If I’d allowed my fear of failure to paralyze me in my 20s, I would be in a miserable marriage, working a job I don’t like, and stuck in my own personal hell.

Because I was willing to stare failure in the face, I have the dating life of my dreams, built a 7-figure business, and enjoy a life I honestly never thought was possible.

3. Refusing to Work on Yourself

If you don’t work on yourself in your 20s…if you don’t address childhood trauma, forge your own identity, look at your strengths and weaknesses objectively, and attempt to improve who you are and how you live…you will create a pattern of tolerance.

You will tolerate a shitty life because it’s all you’ve ever known.

You’ll tolerate shitty relationships, jobs, friends, and health because you weren’t willing to do the hard work when you were younger.

And it is MUCH harder to build a business, get in great shape, or create an abundant dating and social life when you’re in your 30s and 40s than it is in your 20s.

Take this decade to work on yourself.

Build a bulletproof body that allows you to do the things you want to do and that you feel confident in.

Master social dynamics and learn how to make friends, find great partners, and experience authentic love and connection (and how to keep it around).

Learn about finances and your respective career so that you can compound your skills and accumulate real wealth.

PUT IN THE WORK to become the person you want to be and everything will fall into place later.

4. Abusing Your Health

Listen…It’s normal to party in your 20s, experiment with drugs, drink a little (ok a lot) too much on the weekends, and order late-night pizzas to cure your hangover.

But sooner or later, you need to start taking your health seriously.

Again, if you become overweight or injure yourself in your 20s, it’s a LOT harder to recover from this in your 30s.

Have fun, but don’t abuse your health.

Prioritize sleep (7 hours minimum every night). Eat clean foods (ideally things that grew in the ground or had a face). Make a habit of going to the gym. Take supplements that are proven to improve performance.

Take care of your body and it will take care of you.Abuse your body and life will abuse you.

5. Allowing Other People to Determine Your Identity

The MOST detrimental thing you can do in your 20s is to allow other people to determine who you should be.

To let society, your parents, your friends, and the media dictate your goals, actions, and ambitions.

I know too many guys who got into a job or relationship because it was what everyone else thought they should do…who now hate their lives and want nothing more than to turn back the clock and make a different decision (but of course, they can’t…because they have 2 kids, a mortgage, and an unhappy marriage they can’t end).

Don’t be like most people.You and only you are responsible for your life and future.And you and only you know what will make you happy, fulfilled, and alive.

You only have one shot at life.

And it’s up to you to make it count.Just because your family wants what is best for you doesn’t mean they know what’s best for you.

And just because society says you should be a rich, handsome billionaire with 6-pack abs doesn’t mean that’s what you should actually do.

Figure out who you really are and who you really want to be and then put in the work to make your goals a reality.

Everything else is bullshit.

[snowmaniaph]

Love Talk: Miyadate Ryota

Is it good to keep secrets from your girlfriend?

As much as possible, it’s good if there are no secrets. I’m the “isn’t it okay as long as we’re happy now?” type so I don’t have to know about their past relationships. I’ll tell her where I’m going every time I go out! That’s the number 1 reason things get complicated (laughs). If I don’t want to feel guilty then I’d honestly tell her and get it over with. If my girlfriend texts another guy in front of me then I would pretend to be calm and say “hmm, you’re texting someone”. Someone who would notice just those slight jealous behaviors would be nice.

Who will you invite on your only rest day this month: your friends or your girlfriend?

Only one day off in a month means that the schedule before and after the break is also packed, right? I think I won’t be able to recharge even if I meet with my girlfriend when I’m in a state where I can’t switch off my work mode. That’s why I want to blow off steam first and hang out with my male friends that I can freely invite to go out. If I don’t then I won’t be able to continue acting calm and composed. If time permits then I would hang out with my friends at lunch, then meet my girlfriend in the evening - this is my ideal. We’ll do a shopping date and then at night we’ll try on what we bought and do a fashion show (laughs).

What do you look for in a girlfriend?

Just for her to “like” me. It’s because she likes me that she wants to be together, gets worried, and allows me... if we’re dating then everything will be connected to our feelings of “like”.  I think it’s the end of the relationship if those feelings disappear. And I also want us to laugh at the same simple things. In these times, it’s already extraordinary to be able to sit beside each other and laugh out loud while watching a variety show! If I can be more greedy than that then I want someone who is careful with doing laundry! I will be happier if that person takes care of my clothes.

How would you convey your feelings of “like” to your girlfriend who worries a lot?

First I’ll ask the reason. I’ll ask “Why are you that worried?” I will convey my sincerity and tell her “I’m here” and “I’m keeping in touch in a way that will make you feel like we’re close even when we are apart”. When I’m busy then it would probably be through phone calls or messages, but if my girlfriend wants to then I’ll go meet her! By the way, I don’t jump to conclusions, and I am not prone to doubt people. I wonder how much I’ll allow if she does things to try to make me anxious before I give in (laughs). One must always be positive in love.

Please tell us about a recent happening.

I wanted to eat something stewed. I went to the grocery after the Takizawa Kabuki Tokyo performance. I boiled onion, shimeji mushroom, beef, and eggplant. It’s best when you put it on a toasted crispy baguette. I divided it per day and ate it for several days!

Source: Potato 08/2021

[buckyownsmylife]

friendzone - chapter 1

The one where director!reader is forced to work alongside her new work crush and the idiot who broke her heart

For general warnings and author’s notes, please go to the fic’s masterlist.

“C’mon, just give me a chance…” I was not having a good day, to say the least. Oh, no, not at all. Not a good year, perhaps - let’s go there, yes, why not? I deserved it, after all. This was all my own doing, and I never allowed myself a single second to forget it.

“Not gonna happen, Evans.” I might have closed the door a little harder than necessary if all of the gazes that fell on me upon entering the set were any indication. “I’m sorry, I know, I just- Where’s my coffee?”

I usually wasn’t this bitchy, but having to work with your ex-boyfriend - your cheating, lying ex-boyfriend - usually had this effect on a person, I imagined. Sending a grateful smile to the PA who had the guts to approach with a steaming cup of joe, I set out to put as much distance as possible between me and the man who was still following my every step.

Why did I ever think a slammed door would stop his pursuit, I would never know. Five months, hundreds of ignored calls and texts, and the guy didn’t quit it. Hell, he even managed to force his way into my dream project, just to force me to talk to him.

I was determined not to give up. He couldn’t be rewarded - not for what he did, not for what he was doing to me right now - but his ego stopped him from even seeing the error of his ways.

He just kept pushing, and as the director of the movie he was starring in, I couldn’t completely ignore him. As much as I wanted to.

“Is everything okay?” My body immediately relaxed at the sound of the (now) familiar English accent. ���What’s going on?” It was clear that Henry wanted to outwardly ask me if Chris was bothering me, but he refrained from doing so. Like the gentleman he was - or, at the very least, someone able to think about the consequences of his actions before doing something he’d come to regret - he didn’t want to put me in a weird position, or even potentially complicate his work relationship with his co-star when he truly didn’t understand what was going on.

It’s not that I didn’t want to tell him. I did. But we’d only known each other for four weeks - the time since pre-production started, plus the week since we started filming. It didn’t matter how much we’d clicked in that time, he was still a relative stranger to me.

Even if I were to trust him… why would he even care about my past with another man? We weren’t yet friends, and nothing romantic was going on, despite all of the dirty dreams I’d been having since our eyes connected for the first time.

I knew I wasn’t the only one who suffered from his superpower. All of the people attracted to males - even some who swore they weren’t - had the same lustful haze in their eyes after spending seconds in his presence…

… and I’d been there before. The woman standing on the sidelines while their lover enraptured the world. Never again, I’d sworn. Never again, I still reminded myself under my breath every time Chris popped into my brain, life or heart. and yet, there I was: five whole minutes into staring into clear blue eyes and no words left to say like I’d unlearned the entire English alphabet simply because Henry Cavill decided to rest his gaze upon me.

Men really did make women go dumb sometimes.

“Nothing that involves you,” Chris spoke from behind me, two hands coming up to seize my waist and pull me against his chest. “You don’t have any reason to be concerned, I can assure you.”

… or insane.

“Get your hands off of me.” I don’t think I’d ever used this tone on Chris before, so his instinctive reaction to let his hands drop to the side of his body could probably be explained by that. But the truth? I didn’t even know I was able to make such a guttural voice until his actions led me to see the world in shades of red, in a way much similar to the one I used to stare at while we were in love, and yet so drastically different it confused and terrified me.

“Do you even have a scene to film today, Chris?” I asked, deciding to completely ignore Henry while I still had to deal with the manchild that was my ex-boyfriend. It took him a while to answer, but after some hesitation, he nodded.

“Yeah, it’s the-”

“No, you don’t.” I knew I was being silly, but fuck. This was my movie set, and he couldn’t just keep doing this - interrupting my work schedule, my dream job because of a romantic past he screwed up.

“Go back to the hotel. I’ll film Henry's solo scenes today.” His nostrils flared, his temper once again getting the best of him, but when he opened his mouth to argue… “Go.”

I was tired of letting him take the reins of my life.

[write-orflight]

The Fraction of Innocence.

**Gif Not Mine**

Anon Requested: 10, 16, and 25 for the smutty prompts thing!!!

10: “were you just touching yourself?” ‘yeah, what are you donna do about it?’

16: “the only way you are gonna get off is on my thigh.”

25: “she may be all lollipops and candy bars, but I bet behind closed doors she’s hand cuffs and gags.”

Pairings: SpencerXReader

Rating: M, (This is very explicit.)

Words: 4K

Warnings: NSFW!!! 18+ (Dom!Spencer, BDSM overtones, sexual conduct, fingering, bondage, etc.)

Request: OPEN/CLOSED

Summary: Spencer thinks Y/N is an innocent, naive girl until a case reveals her extracurricular activities. 

Spencer had been back from jail for 2 months when he first met her. 

At first he didn’t think anything of her, other than the faint smell of vanilla and daisy as she walked past him in the bullpen and the bright smile that seemed to take up half her face. She was carrying files close to her chest like a schoolgirl late to class and the skirt of her white dress bellowed softly behind her as she made her way to Emily’s office.  

“Who is that?” He had asked. 

Luke looked up to where Spencer’s gaze was. “Oh, that’s Y/N, she's a tech analyst helping Penelope out right now. She’s sweet, you’ll like her.”  

It doesn’t take Spencer long after that to decide he, in fact, does not like you. There was nothing wrong with you. Luke was right, you were sweet, almost sickeningly so. It was like you had no concept of reality. You lived in this world of all sunshine and good things despite the horror that crossed your screen daily. And while Penelope was the same, she at the very least knew how bad the world could be and chose to see the good in it. You didn’t, it was like you’d never had a single bad thing happen to you. And Spencer, who had been dealt the bad hand so many times in life hated that. 

It also didn’t help that you were gorgeous too. You looked like an artist sculpted you himself to make the perfect woman. Real People weren’t supposed to look like that. Real people were supposed to have flaws and blisters. Real people were supposed to look tired so early in the morning not fully awake and smiling while handing everyone in the office a coffee. He didn’t understand how you could be real.   

“Here you go, Spencer. Americano lots of sugar.” You said, placing the coffee on his desk. 

“Thank you.” He mumbles. 

“We have a case, by the way.” You giggle, going off to hand Luke his coffee before walking away to the conference room. Spencer was barely able to keep his eye roll at bay. 

Luke sees that and laughs, clapping Spencer on the back. “Come on, kid. Play nice.” 

“She’s giggling about a murder case.” Spencer grumbles before following him into the conference room. 

“3 women have been murdered in Queens. Judging by the scars, they were all bound and strangled before finally being dumped in an alley.” Garcia says, as she goes through the slides, showing the crime scenes. “Police need our help finding the connection between these three women because right now, it looks like there is none.” 

“I’d say.” Tara speaks up. “We have a waitress/student, a doctor, and a paralegal. All living in different areas of the city with virtually no reason to interact.” 

Spencer looks down at his file, examining the picture when he notices something. Just as he opens his mouth to say something, you clear your throat.  

“Umm, Emily?” You say from your seat right across from Spencer. Emily looks up inquisitively at you. “I think I know what connects them.” 

“What’s that, Y/N?” Emily asks, raising a brow at her.  

You clear your throat again. “Victim #2, Rebecca Belfront, has a Padlock collar necklace on in her second picture. That’s typically used to indicate she’s a submissive with a committed dominant partner. But she wasn’t wearing it when her body was found which makes me think that that relationship recently ended. That made me look at the marks on their arms. While there are some new ones from the murders, they all have faded marks around the wrist and body as well. Leads me to believe the bounding was er-... consensual. We should probably look into New York’s BDSM scene.” You close, smiling awkwardly. 

Spencer looks at you in shock. He, of course, had come to the same conclusion you did and had been about to say that but he, at least, knew why he knew that. Why did you know that? 

Emily hummed thoughtfully. “It’s worth looking into. Do you mind coming to NY with us? Your insight might be needed.” 

You look kind of shocked at that but nod. “Of course, whatever I can do to help.” You say, softly. 

“Great, Wheels up in 30.” She says, getting up, effectively ending the meet. Spencer watches you speed after her, files in hand to ask some more questions. Spencer’s walking back to his desk when Luke catches up with him. 

“Y/N has a dark side. Who knew?” He says, smirking. 

“Probably not.” Spencer muses. “She could’ve just known that. I mean, I  just know stuff sometimes too.” 

“Nah, I don’t think so. Her body language gave her away. She was flushing and stuttering sure, but she was confident in what she was saying. Almost as if, she was speaking from experience.” Luke laughs. “She may be all lollipops and candy bars here, but I bet behind closed doors, she’s handcuffs and gags.”  

Spencer hums. “Maybe.” He says looking up to watch you walk back across the catwalk from Prentiss’ office. Luke was right though, your body language did give you completely away that you were talking from experience. Spencer couldn’t help but wonder just how much. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

When you arrive in New York, You head straight from the jet to the Police Station in Queens. You fiddle with your thumbs a bit, you are nervous. 

“You ok?” Spencer says, from his spot in front of the bulletin board he was setting up. You were supposed to be helping him but you knew Spencer was particular about some things so you let him do it. In fact, there were a lot of things you’d let Spencer do. With you, to you, you weren’t picky. The man was gorgeous enough to make you nervous. With his lean muscles, long, fluffy hair, and large hands, he looked like something that walked right out of a wet dream of yours. Which sometimes, he was just that. You weren’t stupid though, you knew Spencer didn’t think of you that way. In fact, you didn’t think Spencer thought of you in any way. He seemed to ignore you anyway he could. 

You look up from your laptop. “Oh yea, I’m fine. I’m just...nervous. I’ve never been in the field.” 

“Chances are you won’t be, Emily will probably keep you in the Station if she can help it.” Spencer provides. 

“I know, it’s just-- you know what I mean.” You say, Spencer nods before returning to the bulletin board. You stand to look at the map with him. “So, from what I was able to find there’s only 3 BDSM clubs in Queens but there’s only one in the middle of where the three women were found. Place called Cat’s Cradle.” 

Spencer hums. “How complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is.” You look up at the man, recognizing the quote.  

“There is love enough in this world for everybody, if people will just look.” You say back, shrugging. 

“You read Vonnegut?” He asks. 

“You said that like you’re more surprised that I can read than what I read being Vonnegut.” You say, Spencer shrugs not even denying it. God, he was such a dick sometimes. A hot dick, but a dick nonetheless. 

The two of you turn when you hear a knock at the door to see the lead detective coming in to check on you guys. “Just wanted to see how things were coming along. Also see if you guys needed anything?” Though he only directed the question at you with a sly smirk on his face. Men were so obvious sometimes. 

“Nope, we’re fine.” You smile although you didn’t want to. “We’ve narrowed down to a couple BDSM clubs so hopefully we’ll catch our guy soon.” 

“Wait, you think these girls were…” He trails off. You nod, knowing what he was thinking. “Well, it probably serves them right.” 

“Excuse me?” You say. 

“Listen, I know what kind of girls go into those kinds of clubs. If they want to be sexual deviants, they can’t be surprised when shit like this happens to them.” He gestures to the board. 

“Actually more women are into Dominant/Submissive as well as BDSM relationships than you would think, statistically 85%.” Spencer cuts him off. “These clubs are just commonplace for them to meet like minded people just like you would do in any other club and they should be put on trial after their deaths for trusting the wrong person. If you don’t mind, we’d like to get back to work, Detective.” He says, turning back towards the board. The man nods and leaves shortly after that. 

“Thank you.” You say, softly. 

“What for?” Spencer asks. 

“Come on, I work with profilers and I’m not stupid. I know you guys know about me so thank you for defending me just now.” 

“I wasn’t defending you.” Spencer says. “He was making inappropriate comments about victims and we don’t need that outdated way of thinking working on this case. Besides…” He says, eyes flickering down to your lips and back to your eyes. “You’re not the only one with… unconventional extracurriculars.” He turns and walks out after that leaving you watching after him. 

What? 

------------------------------------------------------------------

 After delivering the profile, you find the Unsub, a man named Ivan Parke. The only thing left to do was find the best way to snuff him out. When the team is discussing the next best course of action. It’s then Luke comes up with the idea. 

“We should send Y/N undercover.” He says. “She knows the profile and knows the most about the scene.” 

Emily nods. “Is that something you’re comfortable with, Y/N.” 

You look up. “Oh, um yea. I’d have to find a different outfit but you have to send someone with me.” You say, everyone looks at you confused so you sigh and explain yourself. “If you send me into a club like this, in a foreign place with no Dom, the Unsub isn’t going to be my only worry. Someone’s going to have to play my dominant.”   

“I’ll do it.” Spencer speaks up. Your eyes widened, you were not expecting Spencer to agree to it, you assumed you’d be stuck with Luke. Now you’re going to have to spend the night with the man you’d been crushing on since you started working with the BAU as his submissive. Like that wasn’t a dream come true. 

“Great.” Emily says, dismissing everyone and handing you an expense credit card for an outfit. You take it and leave immediately, ignoring the sly look Spencer gives you. 

You ended with a short, low-cut black leather dress with tank-like sleeves that showed off your curves and left very little to the imagination. As well as a clear pair of platform heels. You pulled your hair back into a sleek ponytail and you topped the look with your own personal leather choker with a large circle knob in the center. It was one of your favorite pieces to wear though you never really got a chance to wear it unless you were going to clubs, which you didn’t do as often these days. It was an expensive piece sure, but so worth it when you got to wear it. You were doing your makeup a little darker then you usually do in the bathroom when Spencer comes in. 

“Is this how you typically look on the weekends?” He asks, standing behind you in the mirror. You look up to look him in the eyes through it. 

“If I have the time.” You shrug. 

“It’s very different. You’re very different from how I thought you were.” 

“And how did you think I was, Spencer?”

“Naive...innocent.”   

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t have assumed anything about me.” You say, turning towards the man. 

“Maybe you’re right… That’s an expensive piece.” He points out pointing to your choker. “Emily’s going to have fun explaining that at the next budgetary hearing.” 

“I didn’t buy it today.” You explain. “It’s mine.” 

Spencer hums for a moment before lifting his hand to turn your jaw, examining the piece. You can’t help the way your breath hitches at the contact. Spencer was already so close to you and now he was touching you, it was already starting to be too much. Soon, Spencer is hooking two fingers into the circle knob of your choker and he yanks it. Involuntarily, a whimper falls from your lips, prompting a smirk from the man across from you. 

“Tonight’s going to be fun.” He says before leaving you in the bathroom in a state of shock. 

-------------------------------------------------------- 

 After getting your comms set up by Luke, who tried to avert his eyes from your frame as much as possible, you and Spencer walk into the Cat’s Cradle. Typically you didn’t like the club scene, but you sometimes liked to venture out when looking for a new partner. Cat’s Cradle was definitely different than the other places you had been. Sure it still had the private rooms and the main stage where a scene was happening in front of you but it was a lot more laid back than the ones you went to in DC. Spencer was really enjoying his role too. Probably hamming it up too much because he knew there was a part of you that actually wanted him to. In the end, finding Ivan Parke was easy. He took the bait almost instantly and you were arresting him just as fast. 

“Great work tonight guys.” Emily says, when you reach the hotel lobby. “Jet’s leaving at 7AM so make sure to get some rest.” She says, dismissing you. 

Now begged a tricky situation because you had almost forgotten you and Spencer were rooming together. As you walked back to the room together the air was thick but both of you were silent. The tension had been building between the two of you since he yanked your choker in the station bathroom. You knew it was a matter of time. The dam had to break. 

“You can shower first.” Spencer says. You nod, taking off your choker and grabbing clothes before taking solace in the bathroom. You wanted Spencer and you knew you needed to expedite this. After a much needed shower, you change into your pajama shorts and tank combo. Spencer steps into the shower almost as soon as you leave it. It’s then that you think of the perfect plan. You lay on the bed and spread your legs before slipping a hand down your shorts. You tease yourself at first, rubbing your clit through your underwear while you thought about the events of the night. How Spencer had been so authoritative. How his hand slid to the small of your back and sometimes ghosted your ass as the two of you walked around the club. How he had been so close in the bathroom. The way he yanked you closer. A small moan escaped you as you slid your hand in your underwear. Soon you hear the bathroom door open. Spencer stops short, watching you before leaning on the frame. 

“Were you just touching yourself?”

“Yes.” You answer. “Are you gonna to do something about it?” 

“Should I? Instead of telling me what you want you decide to act like a brat and do this.” 

Spencer moves closer to the bed but doesn’t do anything, just continues to watch you so you decide to give him a show. Moaning loudly as you slide a digit inside of you. Spencer looks at you with hooded eyes. You can’t help the small laugh that leaves you. 

“I think you’re going to give me what I want.” You say, smirking. 

“And why’s that?” He says. 

“You’re already weak.” You say. 

“I’m weak, pretty girl?” He asks, incredulously. Before you know it, he’s ripping your hand out of your pants and crowding in the space between your legs forcing you to sit up and look at him. “You’re in here touching yourself to the thought of me like a horny teenager and I’m the one who’s weak? Ok.”  He sits back and pulls you by your hips to sit on top of his lap, your legs straddling one of his thighs. “The only way you’re getting off is on my thigh, ok?” He tells you, starting to move your hips. You moan, nodding your head as the friction makes its way through your core. Spencer lifts your shirt off you and smirks when his eyes land on your bare breast. He leans forward to catch your left nipple in his mouth. Your back arches as you grind harder against his thigh. Your hands fly up to start unbuttoning his shirt when he stops you. 

“Did I say you could touch yet, princess?”  He asks. 

“N-No, sir.” You stutter. 

“Then keep your hands to yourself.” He says, putting your hands back to your side. He does indulge you by taking his shirt off himself. But that doesn’t help you keep your hands to yourself. You saw the lean muscle and craved to mark it up with your nails. Your hands go up to touch him again but he stops you. 

“If I have to ask you again, I’m going to tie you up, Princess. Just be good, baby.” 

You were already close before but now with Spencer’s hands and mouth everywhere and constant friction on your sex it was damn near pushing you off the edge. 

“I’m gonna come.” You tell him, he grips your hips tighter, lifting his leg slightly so he was only rubbing against your clit. That makes you moan out loudly. 

“Go ahead, Princess. Cum for me.” He says, and that was all you needed to fall right over the edge. Your legs shake and convulse as Spencer grips your hips help you ride it out.  Soon you come down panting and he’s kissing into your neck. He pulls back and grips your jaw. 

“Still think I’m weak, Princess?”  He asks. 

You knew it was unwise. In fact, you tried to stop yourself before you did it but it was too late. You reared your hand back and slapped Spencer across the cheek. Not hard enough to be seen as anything malicious but sharp enough to throw him off, like he couldn’t believe you had done it.  

“Yes I do.” You say looking him in the eyes after. Something like a switch went off because there was no other way to describe the look he gave you other than feral and fully primitive. He pushes you off him. 

“Get on your hands and knees, now.” He says, menacingly. You scramble and run to get into the position. Once in, Spencer forces your knees further apart. He angrily takes his belt off his pants before fashioning them into a makeshift cuff and pulling your wrist so they’re tied behind your back, leaving you face down into the mattress. He slides your shorts and underwear off in one go. You yelp loudly when the first slap comes to your behind. When the second and third slap comes, you try to squeeze your legs together to get some form of friction but Spencer forces your knees further apart. You moan out when you feel a digit slide against your folds. You try to push back on it but Spencer holds your hips in place. 

“P-Please.” you stutter. 

“What do you want, Princess?” He says, sliding a second digit inside you making you cry out more. 

“Please, fuck me, Spencer.” You say, and you really didn’t have to ask twice because almost as soon as you ask Spencer’s hands leave you to finish unbuckling his pants. There’s a brief moment of calm, so calm that you almost think Spencer wasn’t going to give you what you want but that calm is interrupted by Spencer slamming into, no warning. You scream out but that’s only rewarded with your head being shoved more into the mattress to muffle your cries. Spencer’s hands are pulling on your cuffs so he is almost impossibly deep inside you. You moans start to get louder and louder. Suddenly, Spencer is pulling you up so you’re both sitting up, your back against his chest. One of his hands slides to grip around your neck while the other is moving to circle your clit. The hand around your neck tilts your jaw back so you’re looking up at the man behind you. 

“Fuck, you feel so good. Open your mouth, Princess.” He orders, which you do instantly sticking your tongue out. Spencer leans forward and spits into your waiting mouth before locking his mouth with yours. His hand squeezes your neck tighter as you moan into his mouth as he starts fucking you faster, his dick hitting your g-spot almost every thrust. It’s not long before you’re just babbling, not even able to string a coherent sentence together. 

“You gonna come for me, Princess?” He asks. You nod, moaning loudly. At this point, you knew there was no way the person in the room next to you guys didn’t hear you. You could only hope that it wasn’t one of the team. “Go ahead for me, baby. Be a good girl and come on my cock.” After that, it doesn’t take long before you’re falling over the edge, shaking all the while. Spencer fucks you through it before tightening his grip on your hips to bend you back forwards so your face is back on the mattress. He fucks you hard and fast before falling over the edge himself, moaning your name. 

The two of you say nothing as he unties you. When he does, you instantly flop down on your back, breathing heavily. Spencer wordlessly gets up and goes to the bathroom. For a moment you think he’s just leaving you like this, that you were foolish to think Spencer cared anything about you but in that moment he comes back with a wet cloth and ointment. He says nothing as he wipes between your legs before tossing the towel aside. You watch him with a smirk on your face as he rubs the ointment on the red marks the red cuffs made on you. 

He looks you in the eye. “What, Y/N?” 

“What happened to Princess?” You say, Spencer just looks at you with a bored expression which only makes you smile more. “Now’s probably a good time for you to ask me to dinner.” 

Spencer chuckles lightly at that. “You don’t want to go to dinner with me.” 

“I’m almost positive I do. Why would you say that?” You ask. 

Spencer looks you in the eyes at that moment. “I’m not-Y/N, I’m not like you.” 

“Like me?” 

“I’m not able to be cheery and smiley. I can’t float into rooms. I can’t be happy like you are, too much has happened to me. You deserve someone happy.” 

“Spencer.” You say, looking him in the eyes. “You are not broken. You can be happy, it’s going to take time sure but I’m willing to be with you through that. If you want that.” You say. 

Spencer nods. “Ok, Y/N.” he smiles. 

“So….?” 

He rolls his eyes at that. “What’re you doing next sunday?” 

You smile, brightly. “Absolutely nothing.”    

Perm. Taglist: @moonshinerbynight​ @crimeshowtrash​

[salemwritesxx]

𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓫𝓪𝓼𝓪.

𝕋 𝕒 𝕜 𝕒 𝕞 𝕚  𝕂 𝕖 𝕚 𝕘 𝕠 | ℍ 𝕒 𝕨 𝕜 𝕤

     ⇴ male reader [25, Vigilantes, quirkless]      ⇴ all characters are depicted as [18]+

↳ request: Add on to the ask my bad! {Vigilante reader instead of hero-: When hawks found out he was expecting a baby he immediately kept it a secret from the reader and his friends. Since he doesn't want the hero commission/the public to catch wind of it cause it'll put both of their lives at risk also the public wouldn't be happy to know that their hero is in a relationship with someone who isn't a female- {{Angst!- The hero commission isn't supportive of hawks love life and unborn child_ if they found out about it, they'll probably blackmail the reader into doing their dirty work in exchange for hawks life.) But,, he soon tells the reader after being confronted about his change of behavior and appearance. About 3-4 months into the pregnancy. Time skip to where the kid is born- happy ending🤙🏾

↣ rating: general audiences ↣ warnings: mpreg, size / height difference, lil’ bit of angst with happy ending, discussion of abortion

｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

“No… No, no, no. Fuck!”, he cursed quietly.

Staring in disbelief at the little plastic strip, he put it besides two others. All three of them were positive. There was no doubt. Hawks was… pregnant.

Falling back onto the closed toilet seat, he sighed deeply as tears welled up in his eyes. Keigo wasn’t one to cry easily, but right now everything broke apart. How would everyone react? How would the HPSC react? How would you react? Right now, it seemed like his past was catching up to him, what if everything turned out the same? What if history repeated itself? Would his unborn child have to endure so much as well? Wouldn’t it be better, if it was never born-

“Keigo?”, your voice made him snap out of his dark thoughts.

“[Your.name]?”, hastily wiping his tears and pushing the pregnancy tests into the trash, he tried his best to sound calm.

“So you’re here! I was worried, Kei! You ignored my calls.”, when he came out, you stood there leaning against the wall, a worried expression on your face.

“Ah, no. I was just busy, you know? HPSC needed me again today.”, Kei tried his best to lie and put on his best fake smile.

But you still found it suspicious.

“Are you okay, Baby?”, taking a step towards him, your big hand cupped his cheek and your thumb gently wiped over his red, swollen undereye.

Had he been crying? Keigo? That’s rare.

“I am fine, [Your.name], I am fine. What about you though?”, he kept smiling when he pushed away your hand and walked past you into the kitchen.

“I haven’t heard from you in a while, too, ya know?”

“Ah…”, was the only sound you made as you shyly scratched your neck.

“That’s true. I’m sorry if I worried you, Kei. It’s just… I had to hide for a few days. The police were especially pesky and I couldn’t risk being caught.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay.”, he waved aside, “It’s not like I was worried. I know you can handle yourself just fine.”

This was the last thing you thought you would hear from him, leaving you confused and maybe a little… hurt? Sure, you chose to be a Vigilantes and go out at night to take care of some things your own, but to think your boyfriend wasn’t even worried about you while doing so? Maybe he really did despise what you did and he just never said so out loud. Until now, he had never commented on the illegal things you did, because ultimately, you never destroyed anything and just helped the less unfortunate people, but maybe…

After all, you worried about him constantly and he was a licensed pro-hero, still – many things could happen. Like that, you had a weird feeling that Hawks was not fine at all despite him claiming he was.

And while normally, your little reunion would have been much different, Kei just couldn’t think about anything at that point. All he was thinking about was the baby growing inside of him and what he should do about it…

-

As weeks went by, you noticed Hawks was changing. His excuse of being “bloated” was weird and got old quickly. Furthermore had your relationship taken a big hit. Few kisses and almost no touching. It almost seemed like he was uncomfortable constantly. You wondered what it all was about. Was it just over? Did your relationship just slip right through your fingers and you couldn’t do anything about it?

Usually, when you were both home, the apartment was filled with dumb laughter. It was so nice being around you, but all Keigo was in the past few weeks was anxious, quiet and easily agitated. His home was his safe place, it’s where he could forget everything and relax. Not think about his work, about the HPSC, but with your child growing consistently, it was harder and harder to relax. In just a few weeks, someone who had a keen eye could probably tell that he wasn’t “bloated” anymore. Instead, he didn’t know what to do anymore.

-

Then, one day, it must have been around the fourth month of his pregnancy, someone rang the doorbell in the middle of the night. First, Keigo wanted to ignore it, however, as they kept ringing, a thought popped into his head. He hadn’t seen you in about a week, which wasn’t unusual per se as you had to hide from time to time, but for you to not contact him at all was a little… odd. Were you in trouble? Did they find about your connection to him?

Hence, with his own feather in his hand, he was ready to defend himself as he made his way to the door. The rain was drumming against the windows mercilessly. Perfect distraction if someone wanted to raid him.

Though, when he swung open the door, ready to cut anyone and anything, it all came differently. A large body was leaning against the side of the door.

“[Your.name]!”, his golden eyes widened as your own [eye.color] ones looked quite lifeless.

Before Hawks could do anything, you couldn’t hold yourself upright anymore, thus falling through the opened door. Quickly reacting, he caught you, but being so much smaller than you, his feathers had to help lift you and get you inside his apartment. Only then, when he pulled his hands back did he realize what was on his hands and what he had thought to be water, was actually blood.

His heart dropped into the pit of his stomach. Rushing to your side, he literally ripped open your black coat and what was underneath, revealing a gaping wound on your side.

“Kei…”, you suddenly croaked, trying to reach out your hand, which he immediately grabbed and squeezed tightly.

“Don’t talk, [Your.name]! Everything will be alright, okay?!”, he visibly panicked.

He could hide his feelings very well. At least usually. But not this time. Maybe it was because he was hormonal due to the pregnancy, but just the thought of losing you made him cry. Hastily standing back up, he rushed into the bathroom to grab some towels and into the bedroom to get his phone.

“I… I didn’t know… where else to go… Kei…”, you coughed up a bit of blood, even though he had told you to not talk anymore.

“I know, I know. It’s okay, Baby.”, hugging you against his chest, all he could do was sob, “Everything will be alright, okay?!”

--

With a thumping heart, Hawks stood in front of the door for a few moments, before he knocked and entered eventually.

“Oh! Kei!”, you were just eating your pudding.

“[Your.name]!”, without holding back, he rushed towards your bed and jumped you.

However, hearing your painful whimper due to the ecstatic hug, he immediately pulled back with a small “I’m sorry.”

You, however, just shook your head and put the pudding and spoon away before gesturing him to come closer again.

“No, it’s okay, come here.”, you said with a soft smile as you pulled him in again.

Keigo just following your movement, scooching closer and in the end, hugging you again when you wrapped your own bandaged arms around him. You were so much more beat up than he initially thought…

“Thank you for saving me, Baby. I’m sorry if I scared you.”

“You did!”, sitting back up, his golden eyes were shimmering, “I was so worried about you.”

“Ehh? Didn’t you say you weren’t worried about me a few months ago?”, you just teased him, but Keigo was hormonal and highly stressed, so he reacted way too violently when tears welled up in his eyes.

“I know… But you know I like to talk big sometimes.”, he sniffled.

Quickly, you reached out to softly cup his face and wipe away the tears.

“I know. Hey… Kei. Tell me what’s going on, hm?”

“Huh?”, his golden eyes widened a bit as he stared at you.

“Baby… I know something’s going on. Things haven’t been normal lately and you act different, too. Tell me, if it’s something I did, I can change. I will do anything, but please be honest with me already… Last night, I thought, that’s it. I thought I’d die with things being so weird between us. It was horrible to think about it…”

Looking around for a moment, you were the only one in this room and even if it wasn’t the best location to finally say it out loud, Keigo just couldn’t continue to lie. He had wanted to get an abortion three times and canceled every time because he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Clearly, he wanted this baby. And he wanted you to know, it was just all so… complicated.

“Kei…”, you squeezed his hand one more time.

“Okay…”, sitting down on the bed properly, his other hand reached out as well, needing every bit of comfort and support he could get.

“I…”, biting his lip, he hesitated for a moment before looking up and straight into your eyes, “I am pregnant.”

Your eyes widened and for a second, you just stared at him in disbelief.

“Wait… you…? Really?”

“Yeah…”

“Oh my God… that explains a lot.”, you kind of laughed while shaking your head, but then you realized something.

“Wait… How long...?”

“17th week… Do you not understand, [Your.name]? I am pregnant.”

“Yes, I understand quite well and I think that’s amazing.”, you squeezed his hands again, a big smile on your lips.

“No, no! You don’t get it, [Your.name]!”, Hawks then suddenly stood up, “This is not amazing. Do you know what that means?”, he sighed and rubbed his eyes.

“Kei…”

“We are fucked, [Your.name]. Do you know what happens when the HPSC or the public finds out? Let alone who the father is? What if… What if our baby has to endure everything I had to endure? What if… I become like them? Or what if the HPSC finds out and takes them away from us?”, his voice broke a little at the end, just imagining it…

“Keigo, hey.”, you turned around and placed your feet onto the ground, sitting on the edge of the bed, hence why you could take his hands again and pull him closer.

“You will never become like them.”, you cupped his face, gently wiping the tears away from the corner of his eyes.

“And, Kei, you already made a decision, no? You want to keep the baby – our baby – right? It’s already the fourth month…”

“I do… But… I don’t know what I should do. I am not myself, [Your.name]. I keep crying over stupid things, I can't concentrate when I’m doing my work and I am always scared someone finds out.”, eventually, you pulled him onto your lap, though he was careful not to hurt your side.

“I know you’re scared, Baby. I am too, but we can do it. Together. I will be with you every step. I will protect you.”

“[Your.name]…”, wrapping his arms around you, he buried his face in the nook of your neck, his small frame shaking.

“It’s okay. I’m here, Kei. And I won’t go, ever. We will do it together. And I promise… I promise I will stop going out during the night.”, you whispered this promise into his ear, earning his small sniffles as he clung to you.

“Our baby doesn’t have to grow up in isolation because of my recklessness. I will become a good father. They will have a great life, okay, Kei? We can do it. Whatever the HPSC throws at us, we will deal with it, together. I promise they won’t grow up like you had to.”

The last thing surely broke him as Hawks barely whispered a “Mhm.” back. But at the same time he was smiling, so grateful he was finally able to let you know as the last few months were really straining.

---

“I wish you were never born! You are a nuisance! You keep me from being free!”

“Why did I not get an abortion? Why did I do this to myself? You good for nothing!”

“-go! -igo! Keigo!”, his golden eyes opened at last.

Breathing heavily and with beads of sweat running down his temple, Hawks stared at you for a moment. Still not really sure what just happened the realization sank in little by little. A dream.

“[Your.name]…”

“Hey, I’m here. It’s okay now.”, you whispered and gently kissed him, before hugging him tightly.

Melting into your arms instantly, he buried his face at your chest as one hand reached down to his growing belly. He would probably pop soon.

“It’s weird… I haven’t thought or dreamt about them in over ten years and now… ever since I found out I’m pregnant… I …”, he mumbled more than anything, glad you were there to hold him.

“I know.”, was the only thing you whispered back while gently caressing his back.

When the HPSC trained him, he forgot, or rather suppressed most of his abusive and traumatic childhood. Maybe it was because he worried so much about your little baby that it all came crashing down on him eventually. But he would never become like them.

“Oh-“, both of you felt a little kick, making you giggle.

“Seems like our little baby girl wants to cheer you up as well.”, you whispered and nuzzled his head with your own while your hand reached out to his belly as well, softly caressing it.

“Seems like it.”, Keigo finally smiled a little.

“We will protect her.”, he quietly said after stealing a soft kiss from you.

“We will. And hey, the public took it really well when we outed us. The HPSC can’t do shit to hurt us anymore.”

“Yeah, I know. Thank God.”, cupping your cheek, Kei pulled you down again, before whispering against your lips, “Thank you.”

“Mhmh, for what?”, you chuckled and kissed him again, making him also giggle.

“Just… for everything. I love you, [Your.name].”

Smiling softly at him, you pecked his lips again and whispered an, “I love you too.”

For a few moments, it was quiet as you just cuddled and tried to calm down the excited little girl who was kicking and punching Hawks.

“Say… how do you feel, though? You haven’t been out in-“, but another kiss stopped him from continuing.

“I am perfectly fine, Shortcake. It… was hard, but it was the right decision. You are more important than anything or anyone else, and now with our little nugget growing… what we have is just so much more important to me than vigilante justice.”

The smile that spread across his face was truly warming your heart. It was the right decision and you wouldn’t regret it. You knew how hard his childhood was and you didn’t want that for your baby girl. She should be able to proudly say who her parents were and for that reason, you couldn’t continue your former lifestyle.

After sharing a few more kisses, Hawks then asked for cuddles, which you happily agreed to. Hence letting him shift positions and turn around, careful not to hit you with his wings, he hugged his pregnancy pillow. And then, you slipped your own arms around him, hugging him carefully and littering small kisses onto his neck.

He was so small in your arms, but that’s what he had loved from day one on. Keigo felt protected and loved when he was in your arms.

--

Calling out for you, Keigo carried the groceries into the kitchen, just to bite his lip instantly when he saw you laying on the sofa. Your little baby girl sprawled out on top of your broad chest, sleeping. Once Hawks came a little closer, he realized you were sleeping as well, thus with a soft smile he just kneeled down in front of the sofa.

“What would I do without you, [Your.name]? You two are seriously the light of my life.”, he thought with a big smile on his lips.

To think he was so incredibly sad when he found out, he couldn’t be more happier now. Everything turned out alright after all, just like you said. Leaning in, Hawks gently kissed his baby girl’s forehead before standing up again, leaving you and Tsubasa alone – at least that was his intention.

However, a soft tug on his clothes made him stop. And a glance back made him smile and turn once more, following your movement and laying down beside you, softly tucked under your arm, just where he belonged.

There were no words needed as you softly kissed him before your head fell back into the pillow. Your arm securely holding him and Tsubasa and just like that, you were able to hold the whole world in your arms.

And it certainly wasn’t any different for Keigo.

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@salemwritesxx || do not repost, edit, modify or translate my works

⇻ salem.talks: I think I repeat myself every time I write for him but… KEIGO IS SO TINY ovo probably cuz I absolutely adore the EndHawk ship and their size difference gives me life? so I cannot help but make it happen when I write x reader with kei. like I can just dream of being as tall and buff as endeavor lmao but yeah this was nice I love preggo hawks!

[ptergwen]

Could you write a fic where Tom is in an interview and talking about the reader as his current gf and also being his first love/childhood love?

woah i wrote kind of a lot like we got DETAILED here 😭 have fun

tom’s love life has been the topic of many conversations over the years. he’s gotten countless questions about who he’s dating and what he looks for in a partner. you’d think the hype would die down at some point, but no. even more rumors have begun to spiral as he promotes cherry.

thank the nosy interviewers for that. they’re taking all their chances to get up close and personal.

“so, let’s talk about love,” an interviewer prompts tom one afternoon. he sits up straighter in his chair, expression serious. “sure, let’s.” “what do you think about it?” she’s being vague so she’ll get the most clickable answers. “do you mean, like, in this film? or just in life?” tom wears a curious smirk now. he glances off to the side, where you’re sat watching.

you’ve been sitting in on his interviews as of late to keep him entertained. as much as the movie means to him, he gets bored of answering the same questions about it. having you there to snicker at his jokes or blow him kisses really livens things up. it’s been that way since you were little. you’re always cheering tom up even if he doesn’t realize he needs any.

“both,” the woman replies, mirroring his cheeky smile. “right, that’s what i thought.” tom clears his throat and raises an eyebrow. “so i’m not mistaken, love in my own life?” “anything you feel like sharing.” she beams into the camera while he nods to himself. you give tom a little smile of approval, which he catches from the corner of his eye. he chuckles at the gesture.

“easy enough. i’ll start with cherry, then,” he decides, getting back into the movie. the interviewer nods for him to go on. “you know, cherry’s always been kind of unlucky in the relationship department.” tom pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts. “until he meets emily, and things are still a bit complicated with her. i’d say it’s the same way for me.”

you jaw drops off camera, tom doing his best to stifle a laugh. he’s the biggest tease to walk this earth. “oh, that can’t be right,” tom’s interviewer insists with a mischievous grin. “you’re one of the most eligible bachelors out there.” “not exactly eligible, actually,” he mutters and twiddles his thumbs in his lap. a smile creeps onto his face.

she doesn’t miss that. “you do have a special someone after all?” tom squints at her through the screen. “after all? who’s been asking?” he jokes, the woman laughing like it’s the funniest thing she’s ever heard. “everyone has. the entire world.” you make wide eyes at tom. he’s never given many details about his dating life before, so this is a big step to take.

“well,” he starts, glancing over at you subtly. “yes, i’m a taken man.” “by who?” the interviewer blurts. she’s the first person to get anything out of him. “um,” tom breathes out an awkward laugh. you mouth it’s okay to him, ready to give the people what they’ve been craving.

you’ve had this conversation with tom a couple of times. he’s never wanted to put any pressure on you about going public, so it’s been your call if and when you do. now, you’ve made it.

“my, uh, my best friend. it’s not harrison, for those of you who know him.” tom bites back another smile. you sport one of your own, the tips of his ears turning red. “does this best friend have a name?” the woman questions. he looks to you again for your permission to say it. you think about it for a few seconds, then you give in.

“it’s y/n. you might recognize her,” tom explains, shifting in his chair. “she’s been on my instagram a few times, other stuff like that,” the interviewer makes a mental note to insert his posts of you in the video. “yes, yes. i think i do. you said she’s your best friend?” she clasps her hands. he’s fully blushing now, you giggling quietly at the sight.

“since secondary school, yeah. we met in one of our classes. english, i believe,” tom hums. “i was sitting alone, so she came and sat next to me.” he’s grinning at the fond memory. you feel your face starting to get hot. “how sweet. it seems like you became fast friends,” the woman suggests, throwing more questions out.

“what happened that turned your friendship to a relationship?”

it was when you were two wiser and more experienced adults that you and tom came to understand your connection. there was one moment specifically that turned you from friends to something more, though. tom will share that story with his interviewer, since it seems like she’s into the gossip.

“we didn’t seal the deal until a couple of years ago.” tom breathes out a laugh at what he’s about to say. you’re well aware of it, rolling your eyes playfully. “but, there was a moment when we were kids that i knew i really liked her.” “please, spill,” tom’s interviewer happily requests. he gladly obliges.

“y/n asked me to practice kissing with her because she liked some other bloke.” tom whispers to his camera, “which wasn’t true, by the way. we’ll get to that.” you silently groan and throw your head back on your chair. he shoots you a wink before continuing. “she wanted to go out with him, and said it was a best friend’s job to help her... prepare.”

you press a kiss to your middle finger and stick it up at tom. “precious,” he sarcastically mumbles in response. “what happened next?” the woman reels him back in. tom focuses on the screen again. “right. so, i did some research on how to kiss.” he shakes his head at his former self. “i really should’ve been studying for my A levels or something.”

“when i’m all ready, i invite y/n/n over so we can ‘practice’.” tom makes air quotes around the world, you murmuring, “i hate you,” only for him to hear. “i don’t know what website i used, but it was clearly awful.” he holds a hand up to pretend it’s your face. “i went in, and i just, like, stuck my tongue down her throat. like this.” he’s recreating the moment, you cringing at the vivid image you get.

“oh, no. what did she do?” the interviewer gives tom a pained look. “she nearly vomited, is what she did. ran home right after.” tom puffs air out of his cheeks. you press your lips together in satisfaction. “anyway, we’re reminiscing on it a few years later, and y/n/n tells me something very interesting.” leaning forward, the woman gestures for him to say it.

“i was the bloke she was gonna ask out, but my terrible kissing skills, or lack thereof, scared her off.” he exchanges a knowing look with you. his interviewer gasps. “i was like... are you fucking kidding me?” he only mouths the fucking part even though it’s getting bleeped. that makes you snort. “there’s a turning point, there’s a turning point,” tom reassures everyone.

“i told her i’ve gotten better since then, and we should try again if she wanted.” the interviewer puts a hand on her heart. “did you?” tom lets out a content sigh. “we did, and then we had a long talk about feelings and all that shit.” you make a heart with your fingers for him. he puckers his lips to mime kissing you, without tongue. “we’ve been together ever since.”

“what a lovely story. thank you for sharing that with me,” the woman butters him up more. she gets another idea. “now that you two are official, do we get to meet her?” “you kind of have,” tom retorts, but still checks with you. not expecting anything to come of this, you only shrug.

“i’ve noticed you looking off camera quite a lot. is y/n there?” his interviewer points out, much to both of your surprise. you’ve been at this for weeks, and she’s the only one to say something. “uh, she is,” tom finds himself admitting. he’s a terrible liar, so he almost had to. “tell her to come say hi!” the woman pushes. you look horrified when tom peeks over.

“no, no. i don’t wanna put her on the spot,” he brushes it off. “she’s a bit... camera shy.” “come on, just for a second!” she persists, waving you over like she can see you. this lady is starting to get on your nerves. “you just told me about that steamy kiss of yours. what’s the difference?” tom quirks an eyebrow. “i don’t know if-“

he stops mid sentence when you appear next to him. it’s to shut the interviewer up. although, you might as well reveal yourself before paparazzi do it.

“never mind,” tom grins a toothy grin up at you. “you wanna have a seat, darling?” “happy to,” you hum as he pats his knee. you take your spot on his thigh, an arm slinging around his neck. he wraps his around your middle. the interviewer is so stunned, she’s finally out of things to say. this could quite literally break the internet.

your voice a low whisper, you speak into his ear. “i can’t believe i’m doing this. you should’ve stopped me.” tom squeezes you closer and tilts his head to the side. “what if i didn’t want to?” “my god.” you plant a quick kiss on his cheek, leaving tom’s mouth hanging open.

“there’s your thumbnail.”