#and just own the fact that im actually disabled

[swaggy-transfag]

Thought of making a post abt my struggles with communicating and getting my thoughts out in words. But then i was struggling too much abt how to word it so it made sense, so i gave up

[suffercerebral]

me having gone to bed at 6 am every day for the past week and generally spiraling mentally while rotting in bed waking up this morning: a 4 mile hike in the heat is a really good idea right now, and while we're at it let's start like 3 art projects

[pallas-cat]

ngl the paranoid idea that a bunch of people i know including my family are now only willing to see me if i get my shit together is pretty strong

as if i should message them with "i swear i won't do insecure rambling in front of you i am somewhat normal my apartment is presentable i have a job please forgive me" (obv won't but a girl has rejection sensitivity but it's unfortunately close to the shit my brain circus says)

[aropride]

might work as a dishwasher if the position is still open in a couple days . which is funny because dishwashing is my least favourite chore by far and it makes me want to fucking Well i shant say . but its better than nothing at least i wouldnt be bored in my room alone. and id get free lunch. BUt i would have to email and say hi is this position suitable for someone whos like, near-comically short but not in a way protected by the ADA and such

[objectlovernonhuman]

villain fictive existing in online spaces moodboard

[mx-paint]

Never get tired of blocking fascists but claiming that trans genocide is good because it stops gay genocide isn't the serve you think it is

[bloodyke]

next person to bring up project 2025 to fearmonger support for genocide joe is getting blown up i cannot stand you bitches

[burningcomputerpersona]

hey sorry for saying the wrong thing i wasn't socialized properly at the shelter. tbh i didn't even know there was a wrong dialogue option but apparantly there was and now you're all silently ignoring me and i'm here wondering what i should've said instead

[unproduciblesmackdown]

being alive at the time i gleaned some general elements abt encanto but never actually heard we don't talk about bruno beyond awareness it existed popping off & i think i heard like the title recited off key off rhythm but in a way that indicates speak singing nonetheless lol so upon experiencing it it's like oh but it's the Verses? while the last refrain goes harder but prior to that it's comparatively underwhelming to said verses which feels appropriate like verses / pieces of a larger picture & that a "we don't talk about him" as a disappointing Lid on infinitely richer more characterful & dynamic "but: talking about him" instances. like well personally it'd be like um seven foot frame....anyway besides being able to firsthand go like oh damn Real (the kind of thing you know exists if alive at the time) it's like alright hang on lol. one thing when a core theme is yeah like "is it a refuge if 'especial' vulnerability ultimately gets pushed out rather than made safer" subset like the parties whose even observation of truths (problems) & drawing attention to them is seen as Ruining Things, like if you're painted as Making futures that aren't simply what's desired or reassuring rather than a guidance via just observing & sharing the truth. but then it's like whaddaya mean living in fear of bruno stuttering and stumbling you could always hear him sort of muttering and mumbling lmao like now that's just Association between the Truth Perceiving & Telling behavior & behavior that's just apparently distinctive of the same person. & like Not Accidentally when [what if people were magic] specifics are obviously primarily abt a metaphorical meaning & like, indeed it was made clear like oh this situation isn't Just b/c [boo we hate your prophecies] & that [an Ability that isn't directed towards what anyone Wants / is "weird" even by these magic standards] isn't Coincidentally given to someone who just so happens to already be "weird" in other ways & be set up to have a different perspective & be pushed away due to having the supposed "extra" vulnerability of unmet needs / insufficient support, same as someone who doesn't "correctly" have any kind of magic ability....like yeah banger and also like Oh Yeah Kind Of Devastating re: that metaphorical resonance allowing for like [set the metaphor aside] now hang on with this about this disabled family member lol. misinterpretation to The Ruinerrr / The Problemmm / The Maliciousss etc (i.e. the scapegoatinggg) despite their efforts likely entirely to the contrary. then despite like, efforts aside, Just Existing, always kind of muttering & mumbling like & what of it. & then like oh sorry weird pets. weird [auspicious for adaptable tenacious thriving surviving; either way simply creatures, existing] pets.

truly like As Is The Idea I'm Sure quickly becomes like hands behind back standing at the window Uh Oh Sisters musing on all the [disabled person] metaphorical & already literal elements there. blair witching it in contemplation like We've All Been There whether being so resented for the mere disruption of "existing in a group as the 'abnormal' odd one out" or like people talking shit abt anything associated w/you as soon as you've left the room, which is also made relevant like, this wasn't Only directed at this person when seemingly permanently gone, nor were they unaware / unaffected prior....pacing in the Musing parlor like things don't Have to be compared to billions but i only ever even see so many things & it's like billions sure is like "get scapegoated rword" & then said scapegoating is presented as only beneficial & we hate autists & even beyond that it's like, grabbing billions, Imagine If Things Meant To Be About Something Were About Something. quite a contrast when they are & furthermore like, deliberate thought & Care for [who gets scapegoated & why] & the truth of like, people getting pushed aside & out who have a key perspective & are primed / liable to come through for others similarly vulnerable & the supposedly Ruinous, Problems Generating disruptiveness is actually the strongest effort to make essential changes to a group. & come through with like, it'd be undermining thee point if it was "reassuring" us like oh haha people will be supportive b/c bruno will be more normal, so great that it Didn't like no, no Normality Reassurance(tm), presence of abnormalities(tm), Good, & everyone Can Deal b/c if you don't then it's pushing this person away, is exactly what happens, including even if they're still Around but are being mistreated b/c that is entirely part of that pushing away like anyone's victim blaming is ready to pounce at any time but if someone can't stand to stay / leaves b/c they can't see another option like that's not out of nowhere nor Regardless of what full support & flexibility they were getting lol. these Active Measures everyone loves so much, which are everywhere always & would include Staying & Trying To Make It Work & those efforts would be "disruptive" & resented & Bringing It On Oneself & etccc smh

that is to all say like. Woww when clearly basically the core thread was these beats of like, the crucial site of [thee scapegoated], & why that comes down on someone & how that plays out. endless ideas about how someone weird(tm) & disabled (&/or queer. but there's no Or here lol. & again like it's a Context like, to even be the one person without kids? likely not living up to "full" correct sexuality in that way alone; any oppression's logics of "inferiority" being logics of ableism, ready examples being that "inferior" race, gender, sexuality (& their experiences as people classed as inferior) all being pathologized as disordered) are seen & treated as someone Ruining Things & who cannot belong like whew. bracing. winding. which, i also recall like i was watching with headphones & during this one dialogue pause i was like "?? what's this Extra Sound i heard there" & had to go over it like twice before being hit upside the head like well it Was still the dialogue pause but it was also bruno Stuttering in a very quiet whisper for the duration of that pause before continuing like iiiiiiii x_x

[spacexfucker]

Calling anything that isn't trans-exclusionary "terf behavior" is bad maybe

[ynboxbox]

lust for life - ms47 & cl16

✰ pairing: mick schumacher vs charles leclerc x fem ! senna ! haas ! reader

✰ summary: what happens to mick and y/n's relationship when y/n is chosen as the new ferrari driver alongside her childhood karting crush, charles leclerc?

✰ a/n bit of a spicy one for my first sma! big sorry to mick fans :-( also this is set in late 2022!

👤 mickschumacher •••

Liked by pierregasly and 430,611 others

mickschumacher Summer lovin' @ynsenna

View all 790 comments

landonorris mega goals

haasf1team you two 🫶

username ok but why didn't she like the post ??

username lmao what are you implying

username calm down its not that srs

👤 ynsenna •••

Liked by kellypiquet and 349,602 others

ynsenna 🤷‍♀️

View all 512 comments

danielricciardo in your mindfulness era 🧿

username girl where is your boyfriend 💀

username wtf weirdo all her posts dont have to be abt him

username yk shes her own person right?

username her not posting mick is sending mee

username caption 😳

👤 wearetherace •••

Liked by pierregasly and 32,881 others

wearetherace RUMOUR ⚠️ Ferrari are considering Y/N Senna for the 2022 season, and have been in talks with Haas to release her from her 2 year contract early.

View all 461 comments

username YES YES YES

username finally she can get out of that shitbox 😭

username she'll just be trading one shitbox for another tho

username expect lots of crashes for ferrari 😂

username she hasnt even crashed out once this season...

username stfu misogynist

username side eye

username bye im so happy for her.

username isgt shes gonna win a championship just like her dad

👤 f1gossipofficial •••

14,668 likes

f1gossipofficial Celebrations for Y/N? The driver was seen partying hard last night at E11even club in Miami through several close friends' instagram stories, and was captured leaving with an unknown man close by her side in the early hours of this morning.

View all 311 comments

username NAURRRR I KNEW IT. THEY BROKE UP

username so mick wasnt there ???

username doesnt look like it 😭

username no apparently just some "guy"

╰┈➤ username yeah who lwk looks like charles

username dont call me crazy but i swear thats charles with her in the last photo?

username why is nobody talking about the fact that this probably means she signed with ferrari tho

username lmao yall thats not charles

👤 charles_leclerc •••

Via Instagram stories

👤 ynsenna •••

Liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 972,871 others

ynsenna gunther might kill me for this post but... all the rumours are, in fact, true ;)

View all 1722 comments

username OH MY GOD

username Y/N AND CHARLES IN THE SAME TEAM

username why do i already ship them ??

lizzo obsessed.

susie_wolff 👏

charles_leclerc ALL of them? 😂

ynsenna ahahah

username OH ???

username sharl u drama whore

username do u guys remember the interview where y/n said her dream teammate would be charles... yeah. 😭

fernandoalo_oficial 🎊

username no im literally shaking rn

username AAAAHHHH OH MY FUCKING GOD

👤 mickschumacher •••

Liked by haasf1team and 365,814 others

mickschumacher Proud ❤️

Comments disabled

👤 ynupdates •••

3,551 likes

ynupdates Mick posted a congratulations for Y/N's new position at ferrari! They were also seen together in Florida on one of her family members' stories.

View all 34 comments

username lmao why did ppl think they actually broke up?

username idk it just feels a bit off to me, he literally only put one word and a love heart :/

╰┈➤ username yall are so weird. stop inventing.

username why did he disable comments 💀

username guys think about it... he might be jealous bc yn had a more successful year than him and is now going to a bigger team than him.

username why does this acc make sense

username people have to remember that her and mick have been in the same team together since f3. all of this stuff is hard to get used to for them, just give them space

username i dont want them to break up but i also think her and charles would be PERFECT together

username literally! do you remember their old karting interviews?? they had so much chemistry

╰┈➤ username its bc she had a crush on him lol

👤 scuderiaferrari •••

Liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,128,794 others

scuderiaferrari A warm Ferrari welcome to our new recruit ❤️ How are you liking red so far, @ynsenna?

View all 3226 comments

ynsenna can't say i hate it tbh

username it just feels right

charles_leclerc 🔥❤️

username HEART EMOJI??

username careful sharl mick has ig too 💀😭

username I USED TO PRAY FOR TIMES LIKE THIS

alfaromeo looking good 👀

username they had to rush to post this lmao

username mick didn't comment or like byeee

username why am i just noticing this 💀

👤 f1 •••

Liked by f1gossipofficial, charles_leclerc and 1,128,794 others

f1 BREAKING: Mick Schumacher to depart Haas at the end of the 2022 season.

View all 784 comments

username gunther count your days

username THEY HAVE NO DRIVERS?..

username he deserved so much better than this shit fucking team ugh

karunchandhok Best of luck Mick ❤️

username liked by charles leclerc ?????????????

username hes just happy bc he can flirt with yn without mick seeing now

╰┈➤ username ayoooo

username it's giving petty

👤 ynsenna •••

Via Instagram stories

👤 deuxmoi •••

Via Instagram stories

👤 f1gossipofficial •••

19,939 likes

f1gossipofficial Jessa & Charles were spotted kissing outside of Zedd's show at LIV Miami last night. It is currently unknown whether Jessa and Mick have broken up.

View all 1642 comments

username I KNEW IT !!!!!!!!!

username this is actually so gross of her :/?? she has a huge fanbase of young girls, why is she promoting this to them...

username Women ☕️

zedd 😳

username NOT HIM COMMENTING

username this is all your fault 😭😭

username we knew this already but yall gaslight us into believing her and mick were still just fine.

username i feel SO bad for mick :( fuck yn.

username yall CHILL they probably just broke up

username no like why is everyone just jumping to cheating like that????

👤 ynsenna •••

Via Instagram stories

To be continued :-)

[drdemonprince]

to the anon who sent me the message that took them 4 hours to draft.

I think your experience both with organizing and disability has probably provoked you to rethink the entire concept of "success" as our culture has defined it, even if you feel yourself still longing for some of the comfort and ease that capitalistic success can seemingly provide (or that we are conditioned to believe it can provide). im not sure what to say that can match the effort your put into your message, in fact i am galled by the fact that i know that i can't match that effort. i don't know how to make sense of the fact that a person who is finding it incredibly difficult to remain connected and engaged during this time, due to disability, has decided that i was worth that level of effort when they don't have the energy to message people they know. i don't think i am worth that effort. but i also respect that mired in all that you're mired in, it's a meaningful gesture toward engagement and connection to even bother writing such a message. i just think in a lot of ways i am a misplaced target for it, because i am a ridiculously privileged and publicly exposed individual who receives dozens of heartfelt messages that he doesnt find the time to respond to every single day. i think if anything that i've written rubs you the wrong way you'd be right to approach it with cynicism. because what the fuck do i know, banging around on my laptop every day and getting paid for it. how dare i lecture anybody about not unlearning capitalism adequately enough. i am one of capitalisms little milking cows. a massive publishing company makes a weekly profit off of me, off the byproduct of the worst years of my life and my worst traumas, as well as the meaning i've made from the scholarship of others.

i'm so enraged for you that you got a debilitating case of COVID (after several other cases) on an encampment, and that now the community you foster at that encampment is not there for you. i am disgusted at how more seasoned activists and organizations have regarded student protestors as disposable this entire year, selling them out to the cops, cutting bad deals with campus administration, and sending them to yellow and red risk level actions without adequate communication and getting them kettled and beat, or else nullifying their efforts with mealy-mouthed talk about keeping things peaceful. i see so many toothless, neoliberal protests happening here, ones that serve only as fundraisers for massive nonprofit orgs, and i also see literal teenagers being dragged right into paddy wagons by the likes of the PSL or the RCP while the Dems deride them and dance to Brat tracks, not even pretending to care the way they unconvincingly did in say 2020.

It's all making me terribly cynical, wondering where we are headed and whether i can or should encourage people who are younger, stronger, more energetic, more pliable, and more vulnerable to me to give up all that they've got for a cause when it's likely gonna be chewed up and spit out and not met in effort by anyone else. i am mournful of the fact that even i can't match that effort. every time i get a message from a friend or acquaintance who is going through some new awful traumatizing event i want to just curl up and disappear, because i can't even keep up with sending compassionate messages to all of them, let alone actually showing the fuck up and doing anything for them. and so sometimes i slip into the disaffected, blunted feeling that once led me as a younger man into libertarianism, thinking that all i can or should do is look after my own wellbeing, and fuck everybody else. and obviously that is a horrible path that is not by any means moral and certainly didn't help me anyway. it felt like we were on the brink of a great paradigm shift of some kind, a collapse of these evil systems, and now it feels like all of that is as far away as it's ever been, and that there aren't enough people with class consciousness and care for one another to make it happen.

i don't know. i think we all have to abandon our dreams of success, of comfort, of saving the world, the fantasies of everything being fine. i think we need to look to our immediate surroundings and our communities. i think we need to ask for help a whole hell of a lot more than any of us are doing, and to recognize that that is a form of helping. i think we need to get small. and remember we are weak animals. and stop thinking there is anything special or chosen about us. and to remember that nature can often be very cruel and that there is nothing we are owed. disabled people already know this of course, we know life isn't fair. we try to do what we can and yet we wake up feeling even less capable the next day, and it knows no logic and the universe remains indifferent to it. but there are people around us who can care, when we ask them to. and ways that we can just be there alongside one another in the muck of it all. not even necessarily making things better. certainly not being a savior and making the pain go away. maybe just sitting in the muck together.

all of which is to say, i am feeling stuck and overwhelmed and useless myself, anon, and i dont have any more answers than you. but thanks for messaging. im sorry people have taking advantage of you. including in my opinion lots of other activists. looking after yourself and not letting people guilt you doesn't mean turning into a conservative. the kind of anarchy that i am embracing right now is one that goes beyond linear change, beyond making meaning, beyond any idealistic visions of the future, beyond even fighting for some kind of symbolic survival. it's just being. none of it has to mean anything, none of it has to be headed anywhere. it just is. there is plenty for you to be bitter about.

[vhstown]

miles g morales ★ general headcanons

warnings: sort of angsty, mentions of his dad's death, money being tight and such 😞

a/n: hi my little piranhas im feeding you today say AHHHHHHHH.... all my random non-relationship miles g thoughts dumped into one! he has 6 lines but less is more right 😁 im okay i promi

Let me just geek out about his non-existent gear functions for a moment 😞 Miles is all about little modifications and improvement so when he messes around with his uncle's gear he decides to make some adjustments to the design and also the functionality. Has his own spin to all of his gear cause a part of him really wants to be like the superheroes he sees in comics with their own sort of persona. But of course it has to be functional so...!

All of his gear is coordinated and he has a mode where he can turn off all the lights for stealth and such! The lights are actually off most of the time but he puts them on to show off mostly or make himself known when he's bored of waiting.

A really cool function would be if he could redirect or offset his lights so when he's fighting in complete darkness he can easily confuse his enemies. Tends to scope out places and mess around with the power supplies — uses the occasional smoke bomb too. He's in his element in dark, maze-like places, which essentially makes Brooklyn his concrete playground.

Scarily good at lockpicking. Has broken into his own house multiple times from forgetting his keys. He can open most doors with simple tools and disable electronic locks with a little work.

Can I just mention his shoes as well... they're like the jumpy shoes from Subway Surfers you can't prove me wrong until the next movie comes out like— Okay no but seriously I imagine he can stick to surfaces and things and maybe they can propell him upwards? You see those glowing lights idk figure it out 😞

Also somebody (I have no idea who but here's the link to the original post) had a headcanon that he'd have a high auditory intelligence, so for a while, he spends time developing a voice modulator. He likely has one anyway to keep his identity a secret, but what he really wants to do is is create a device that can replicate other people's voices.

Because he's good with sound and physics he makes it work in no less than a few weeks. The first voice he tries is his uncle's and he says a bunch of dumbass stuff. (Aaron is a little annoyed but more proud of his nephew than anything.) Eventually it gets to the point where he can calibrate it with a couple clicks since he has such a good ear for frequencies and the like that deceiving villains is no trouble at all.

I think Aaron and Miles would still have that cool uncle and nephew relationship but its also a mentor and student one. While Miles is good at the tech stuff I think he's a pretty lousy fighter at the beginning and Aaron has to teach him a LOT.

Uncle Aaron probably used to fight for sport back in the day (boxing mayhaps? 😁) so a lot of Miles' technique stems from MMA due to its versatility (anything hand-to-hand at least.) Even then, most of the problem is being able to think quick and act quicker, so Miles goes through lots of practical training (so he's being chased by the Sinister Six from day one 😭) It's well worth it though because without the Spider-powers he has a lot of catching up to do.

While training with Aaron he's exposed to a lot of his old records and develops a taste for jazz. He comes to associate certain manoeuvres with the way the music goes, so he tends to hum to himself while casually knocking the wind out of people. His uncle finds it just a little creepy, but again, he's glad to see Miles coming along.

In fact, Aaron is relieved. His nephew had been reserved and was pretty much holed up in his own room for weeks after his dad passed. Of course the passing of Jefferson was hard on Aaron, but Miles has it even harder. Eventually, they decide to paint the mural together, and Miles lets Aaron know what's on his mind. He's always been close to his uncle but especially then spending time roaming the streets, painting, boxing and listening to old records was his lifeline.

Miles figures out his uncle is the Prowler before Aaron even lets him in on it. After seeing how determined his nephew his is, that's when it all started.

But with everything going on in his vigilante life, his normal life is something he has has to be careful not to fall behind on. At the age where college applications are coming up, Miles is driven to the bone with school, despite not actually being there half the time. Still, he's somehow averaging As and the occasional B, easily the top of his class in AP Physics and Calc.

He doesn't try to talk to people in school like he might've before, but he's not antisocial by any means (sometimes his bluntness is mistaken for talking back though 💀)

He's also the type of dude to do homework as soon as the teacher hands it out, because he knows he will not have time later (and to avoid all the night-before crises of freshman year.)

Rio is being pulled thin too, always covering shifts for her colleagues at the hospital just so she can have a little extra pay. She's been saving for Miles' birthday since his last one, always checks his clothes for holes or if they still fit, and makes sure there's something in the microwave if she can't be there for dinner. Rio makes sure he always has everything he needs, even while paying bills and rent. They're not struggling too much, but it's not like they can do whatever they want.

Despite that, they're managing; what she doesn't know is that the sigh of relief she breathes every month is because of him. Miles always makes sure to take care of his belongings, put in any cash he makes from his "part time job" into her account, just doing whatever he can to help. Also, he's become more and more protective of his mom, and he always takes the opportunity to do errands for her, especially when it's getting dark outside.

Miles is actually more paranoid than her when it comes to saving. Even when it's winter, and she tells him to turn on the heating whenever, you best believe he's throwing on his jacket in his own room and firming the cold. It's entirely unnecessary of course, but he can't shake the guilt when he feels the only reason his mom works so hard is because of him. They've moved twice already and there's no way they're moving again, so if the landlord gives them trouble he'll just give them hell (let's just hope it won't come to that.)

Miles learnt how to treat his own injuries from Rio. She taught him basic first aid at the very least, and on a couple of occasions he's tried to learn things himself with the clunky old first aid kit at home. Rio never asks why the stitch on one of their pillows is done with dental floss, and looks strangely like that of a suture (a very bad one at that.)

His Spanish also improved a lot too. After his dad's passing, he met a lot of relatives from his mom's side that he doesn't remember ever seeing before, but it encourages him to learn how to speak better. Long gone are the days of silently observing family drama over the phone — he has to keep up now, and he'll defend his mom cada día de la semana (even if she's somewhat embarrassed by it.) Essentially he's at that level of fluency where he can be rude without being rude 😭 (just saying some of the things his relatives say are NOT helpful.)

With all of this going on in his life, it's no surprise that sleep doesn't come easy. Or maybe it is, considering how much he works his body. Either way, he's left staring at the ceiling or curled up on his side most nights, the untouched toys and collectibles in his room to keep him company. Miles used to sleep at 8pm on the dot and wake up at 6; that was when things were good, and he didn't have his whole universe on his shoulders. All his bed is now is a place to collapse, and close his eyes until it's light outside. Most days, he's exhausted — bone-tired — but the most he gets is a light, forced, uncomfortable sleep. It's one in which he wakes up more tired than he was the night before, but he presses on, getting exercise in during the morning and trying to make breakfast for his mom because he knows a slice of toast is the most she'd bother to have.

And despite all that's changed since his dad has passed, Miles is still a kid. He has a thousand pictures from the time he went to Comic-con, a sketchbook full of drawings he never finishes, meticulously-organised playlists, college applications — all in the midst of a city that's falling apart at the seams as much as he is.

But he's okay, for now. As much as he can be.

"Keep your head up, son."

It's what his dad would've wanted, at the very least.

@phoenixinthefiles @qiupachups

hey 😊 "where's ain't no love part thre—" (GLASS SHATTERING NOISE) (CAT MRYEOWING) (BABY CRYING) (POLICE SIRENS) (WEE WOO WEE WOO)

forget miles IM being pulled thin ... half of this may or may not be projection... schrödingers headcanons anyone 😞 anyways ive been like busy. so . SOON! (lying in 4K)

reblogs appreciated!!! 😘 FIND MY MASTERLIST HERE and urrrr my 42 x reader headcanons here if you're interested ?

[genderqueerdykes]

it's still equinox, we changed our URL

i've had a lot of time to think about it and after my experience with and very deep exposure to my local punk community, i no longer feel safe or accurate calling myself a punk. it's not a community or ideology for me- at its core, what it's supposed to be, sure, but there are dangers that come with this community and label and i'm not interested in participating in them.

i don't really like the idea of associating with people who are focused on building a community centered around violence. i don't want to associate with a community that ignores its sick, injured, disabled, addicted, mentally ill and queer because people are too focused on ignoring reality for the sake of complaining about how bad things are instead of doing something to change them. i'm not comfortable in a community that would rather just hand the active addict another beer or line of coke because they'd rather just momentarily placate the person than get them help.

i'm not interested in being a part of community that values music being played way too loudly, at volumes that damage people's hearing, and fucking around with flashing lights for hours over people's safety and well being. i'm not here for people who are literally screaming things like "Let's play loud noise and piss people off!", proudly stating that they enjoy pissing off people's neighbors. i'm not here for music that i can't even fucking hear.

i'm not here for a community of people who get too drunk and wasted to appreciate the music that's being played for them, and i really don't appreciate a community full of drunk and wasted musicians who go to house venues and trash the place and scream and disrespect the venue owners and literally admit they played the entire set wrong because they were too fucking drunk. i'm sick of perpetually dealing with dirtbag musicians who take advantage of the vulnerable people who join the punk community and see intoxicated minors and shy people and instantly assault them.

i'm not here for people who are intentionally offensive. i'm not here for people who go out of their way to be aggressive and to anger people for no reason whatsoever. i'm not here for unnecessary hatred and violence. i'm not here for performative activism. i'm not here for all the lies and emotional manipulation that goes on. im not here for people who are proud to be assholes. i'm not here for an attempt to re-phrase bullying, exclusion and hatred as counter-culture revolutionary behavior.

i'm not here for talking about changing the world, talking about being better to other people, talking about dismantling oppressive power structures and doing nothing to actually put that into action, and in fact, contributing to those structures. i'm not here for people who say they help their community when in reality all they do is sit around on each others' couches wasting away drinking beer and watching TV for 14 hours a day. i'm not here for listening to people talk about how evil the rich are and then watching them refuse to help a homeless person who needs money or a meal.

i'm not punk. i don't wanna be considered one anymore. i'm just me. i have my own thoughts and feelings about humanity- like how we should prioritize inclusion and safety, but i don't need a label that might misinform people to convey that. i'm just me, a bunch of genderqueer dykes in a trench coat, and i'm fine with that. i'm happy to just be myselves

[vampirevatican]

Milgram and The Court of Public Opinion.

this analysis will be about milgram's voting system, nuance and a whole lot of my own opinions mixed with eng fandoms translations, theories, and observations.

t1 = trial one / t2 = trial two

mv = music video

vd = video drama

voting and verdicts:

voting forgiven/unforgiven or innocent/guilty from the standards milgram sets for us (including es) isn't enough or easy.

being that milgram is set towards the court of public opinion and judgement can come from:

"sensibility, morality, ethics, legality, preference, taste, or sexual inclination..."

we end up arguing semantics, trying to find specifics in the crimes and making the best judgement possible. although in doing that the only conclusion anyone can come to is innocent when all is considered.

if we were doing it based on guilty and innocent then 5 are guilty, 2 are guilty on technicality and 3 are innocent

just in case you're curious, in guilty to innocent order as i just stated.

haruka, muu, amane, mikoto, kotoko, shido, fuuta, kazui, mahiru and yuno

it'd be over so quickly. but this... is milgram.

nuance/the grey area:

as the undercover song says, can you really judge them?

001. haruka did it for attention. with how he's coded - intellectual disability - and his mother being extremely neglectful after a certain age which prevented the possibility of his growth in intellect (understanding cause and effect/actions and consequences, along with many other things) it's easier to claim he's innocent. even more easier to forgive him due to this and extremely so if looking at it from his view point, albeit flawed. killing = attention = "affection", even if that attention/"affection" is negative it what he wanted. for someone, anyone to acknowledge him. he's innocent/forgiven because of his circumstances but if he's forgiven then he's being told it was his only option, and he was right, when the fault is on his mother.

002. yuno, as for now, doesn't have a reason. ofc in western (american specifically) public opinion or at least those who view abortion as a choice. she's been innocent from the start. this is her autonomy, her choice, even if she's 18. i won't deny she is so young to be doing sex work, or more specifically compensated dating, and yes it may be common in japan but that doesn't take away the age being factored into what she decided to do. it wasn't for money and she has a good home life. with how analytical and cold she can be, im assuming her desire to be loved in this way comes from somewhere and she's become jaded towards actual relationships. opting for the material and superficial. even without pitying her, she'd still be forgiven/innocent since t1.

003. fuuta was only trying to call out liars and scumbags. he is well versed in the court of public opinion, but he has never seen or experienced a result that lead to someone's death. looking at the undercover mv, then we can see he possibly doxxed his victim. if we take a nuanced approach here then we'd be looking at how he feels after the fact. he remembers the victims name, the fear in his eyes in his t1 and t2 mv, his voice drama after the first trial, him not approving of violence as a solution are all evidence of him feeling horrible. if he could go back, if he would've known. sure he did question why he's there instead of the people who actually killed the victim, but he also recognizes that he lead the charge. his innocence/forgiveness comes in the form of recognizing his actions were wrong. him being guilty/unforgiven is the action in itself.

004. muu is a love/attention reason. she's always been adored, admired, and cherished. she's always had her way. she also has never had to face heavy adversity. sure she was a bully, the queen bee, and a drama queen but didn't her school's culture allow her that? infact with us/es forgiving her, in the second trial song she claims as such, she'll always be queen. and for the t1 mv she says, "my 'im sorry' spells aren't working anymore." which leads me to believe that she's cried and apologized so many times that her old friends couldn't believe her. not forgiving her affirms to her that "two wrongs don't make a right" but forgiving her says the opposite to her. if she's to be forgiven/innocent the blame is tossed to the school, not her, but she won't see it that way.

005. shido is a love case, but for family. im thinking son because of a theory i saw, but either way when looking at it with nuance it gets heavier here. is taking from brain dead patients to save someone wrong? are the brain dead really dead? in my opinion yes, but that's the crux of the situation right? same goes for all the other inmates in this court of public opinion. he can be innocent from the view point that brain dead patients are already dead, and forgiven for his motive.

006. mahiru is another love case, romantic, and in a roundabout way she never committed a crime in the first place. from the voice drama and interrogation q&a slips, we find out that she's a sheltered girl and loves/idolizes soap opera and shoujo mangas. from her mv's we see she romanticizes everything, especially with her t1 mv. she's innocent because of not actually committing murder and forgiven because this is her first love, she wouldn't have known that it was toxic and messed up.

007. kazui did it in hopes of a dream, righting a mistake, being free. although he deeply regrets it, although he says he loves his wife? that love is mainly platonic. from his second trial mv, we see that he met her through his job - most likely police officer - so they had some kind of amicable relationship through their job. he only married her out of societal obligation, and noticing she liked him. not to mention in his t1 mv he says he messed up from the beginning. he is innocent because his crime is indirect, and forgiven because being gay isn't a crime and the regret he feels shows he never had negative intentions.

008. amane did it out of obligation. now, listen to me. i know she's literally 12 and was raised in a cult but notice how im stating the motive of each of these as they are from being stated in vd or pure observations from the mv's. now to any grown up it's self defense, but also imagine having gone through the worst hell imaginable all because you did something "wrong" stated by the adults around you. wouldn't the revenge be sweet? justice in its purest form. now take that and double it down with what you were taught. amane is not only forgiven/innocent because she was just a child, but because of the circumstances surrounding the murder.

009. mikoto (miko from here on) did it out of pent up stress an emotions, in turn creating john (koto from here on). miko is innocent without a doubt, and no i am not taking on the theory he actually did it til we get trial three. if koto was supposed to be his protector, and if he was born from a sudden explosion of pent up anger then (at least to me) it makes sense that he reacted the way he did. imagine being a corporate slave - no actually double it down, again, with growing up always trying to keep the peace. miko has a habit of laughing when he's upset. he laughs it off in hopes that things get better, his vd affirms this and even his mv after that. miko's smile that shifts to an extremely tired expression right before koto is born and a mirror shatters, right at the start. an intolerable stress from working so hard he grew grey hairs, cried himself to sleep, and yet continued to work, hold it in, and endure. the fault isn't on him or on koto. it's japan's work culture and the endure it mentality. koto is innocent/forgiven in the sense of motive. miko is innocent/forgiven because he's never killed to begin with.

010. kotoko did it to save the innocent. though she doesn't deal in nuance, much like fuuta. a key difference between the two is kotoko chooses violence because the justice system failed her. infact she's been hunting down the awful criminals of the world so much that she even has a covered bulletin board with pinned strings on it. on top of that, from the interrogation cards, we find out she dropped out of college and she was studying law. she'd be innocent for what she was seeking to do, in the court of public opinion, many would agree that awful people deserve a murderous punishment and she'd be even forgiven with that same reason. the nuance appears when considering the criminal, the crime and the reason. factoring those in then she can easily become guilty and unforgiven in the eyes of many, see the results after t1.

when it's all said and done:

they all had their reason, it all has a reason. who are we to say their crimes weren't just or fair? we're the judge, the jury, the executioner, and warden. in milgram whatever we says goes.

i'd love to see them all innocent, but at the same time do each of them deserve that? are their ideas being affirmed a detriment to them or their saving grace?? will they kill again?? will some of them be able to get the therapy and treatment they desperately need??? will they go back into society with an improved outlook on life or will they remain the same?

ofc i already have who i'd like to see forgiven and have already forgiven them myself, same as you reading this and those in the jpn fandom (where it originates)

anyway. moving forward please vote with this in mind, and check out the audio dramas i beg you all. i hope that there are nuance voters and voters with sympathy but with how amane was guilty in t1, i have a strong feeling it's not gonna end well. but if it does, you'll see me rejoice.

[p41nty]

adam katz has done way too much shit and y'all just let it slide we all know about the ableism in the show and the fact he blocked who dared criticize him, but let's talk about the blatant ZIONISM of this man:

he had an isreali flag in his instagram bio until he was called out for it.

he said he put it there for "jewish pride" BITCH THAT'S NOT AN EXCUSE, THE GENOCIDE HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR 70 YEARS

he originally wanted to delay an episode for ONE DAY "to express our condemnation of violence"… sounds like shitty white man capitalist performative activism doesn't it

when he was called out he deleted his twt, privated his instagram and blamed it all on "harassment" and "death threats". what a fucking coward. y'all yt ppl love using the word "harassment" as a fucking buzzword

his mother, jill katz, openly expressed her support for isreal and was following the IOF on twitter. guess the apple doesn't fall far away from the tree.

we should kill this fucker already

do i even have the mental capacity to reply to this coherently.

adam is not his mother? he doesnt share the same views? hes made it explicitly clear he does not support the genocide. hes a jewish man who wanted to celebrate jewish pride but all of you motherfuckers think that just because someone is jewish means they support israels actions. news flash, they DONT.

have you even been on twitter to witness the threats actually happening? i have SEEN people be absolutely horrible to that man and send him death threats and harass him. but just because hes a white man you seem to think he just throws around that word to get sympathy. how is he gonna SEE any of the sympathy if he doesnt have any accounts to begin with?

and im not gonna pretend i wasnt pissed off at ae's shit episode delay, i was. i was infuriated that they thought one day was enough.

they heard us and changed it in the end didnt they? they listened to us and delayed it another week to make room for more awareness

of course at the time preferably not air it at all as it would act as a distraction from what was happen but ae is kinda going downhill so im not really surprised + the ableism thing has been going on for a while with the entire team and not just adam on his own (this is not defending him im mentally disabled myself so seeing him do this stuff is also harming towards me)

"blocked people who dared criticize him" because it resulted in him getting harassed. he unblocked them and apologised + put out a public apology about it later on (and it was well written might i add) since he had to step back and take a breather due to all the harassment he received

let me say this again.

NOT ALL JEWISH PEOPLE ARE ZIONISTS. ADAM DOESNT SHARE THE SAME VIEWS AS HIS MOTHER. LEAVE HIM AND HIS RELIGIONS BELIEFS ALONE.

the fact youre wishing actual DEATH on him makes you no better.