#and in response to that the first people started going ''WELL BUT WHAT IF *I* WANTED TO???''

[hismercytomyjustice]

So fucking true. My intrusive thoughts made me terrified to see a therapist at first. Because they were going to look at me and immediately know I was a danger to society or something. Then the therapist printed out this thing on Pure O OCD and I was just like “Oh, thank fuck.”

Still took me forever to realize I actually HAD OCD and that it wasn’t just ~spicy anxiety~…

Though now that I’ve gotten better at recognizing and defusing the “big, bad” ones, my intrusive thoughts have become a lot “smaller” and more subtle, which I found out in therapy yesterday.

The “big, bad” ones? Stuff like “what if I grab that knife and stab someone” might as well come with a flashing neon “OCD!” sign. Cognitive defusion, BAM!

Subtle, only personally distressing ones? Oh, that’s just a “normal” thought. Cue rumination and reassurance seeking, my ~favorite~ compulsions! Except I don’t realize that’s what I’m doing. Because I don’t realize it’s my OCD/an intrusive thought.

Like “what if I don’t want to learn piano anymore”? Now that is a sneaky intrusive thought. Because then I start spiraling about how I’ve wasted time and money on learning, how I’ve let myself and my teacher down, how I don’t practice enough (what even is enough?), how I’m not making progress like I should be (by whose standards?), how I don’t even know whether or not I even want to quit (because how does someone actually know that kind of thing?)… And I become increasingly more distressed about it all and am sitting there hardcore soul searching, making pros and cons lists, and the guilt is eating me a-fucking-live.

Aaaand. Surprise! Turns out that was my OCD in a trench coat! Because why would that be OCD? That’s just a normal thought, isn’t it? Plenty of people wonder if they enjoy something and if they should continue it, don’t they?

Absolutely! Just not like that!

This rambling reblog brought to you by my therapist starting a question to me yesterday with, “When you have intrusive thoughts like that…” and my mental response being:

Just wanted to share because I had no fucking clue and wish I’d realized those were intrusive thoughts sooner so I could’ve been treating them as such instead of unintentionally compulsing/lapsing.

I mean OCD is definitely very personal and obsessions and all vary widely from person to person, which can make it hard to pinpoint stuff like that sometimes. One person’s intrusive thought very easily can just be another’s regular thought. It’s hard to tell sometimes when they aren’t like the more examples you usually hear about, i.e. things that would be distressing to most people, which is why they’re used as examples.

For this Disability Pride Month, I saw a post that was shittybad and it made me angry. So have this

[daydreams-after-dark]

Free Use Jail Cell, Extra

Dinner date with Minho

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 (final) | extra: Police Reports | Dinner date with Minho

Police Officer Skz ot8 x female reader

Premise: A continuation of the free use jail cell series.

Word Count: this installment 4.3k approx.

Chapter Summary: You are free from the ot8 free use jail, Minho helps you out and then asks you over for dinner.

CW below the cut.

This is also in response to this ask here.

CW: masturbation with sex toys, video sex, spanking, vaginal penetration with an object, oral sex (m rec), vaginal sex (unprotected), restraints, stretch kink (because I'm obsessed).

After he’s finished kissing you and watching you drive away, Minho heads back into the police station. He feels giddy, like a school boy who’s just had his first kiss. It's a feeling he hasn’t felt in a long time and he is both excited and fearful of it. Usually, when things start off this good, they inevitably end in disaster. But you know what he’s like when it comes to sex, and you weren’t scared off. That’s one fundamental difference from his past partners.

“Why the fuck are you smirking like that?” Says Jeongin looking up from his seat in the Chief’s office. 

Everyone is sitting around the coffee table as Chan had gathered everyone for a meeting before going home.

“Not sure what you’re talking about?” Minho grunts, taking a seat next to Jisung, and trying to act like he didn’t just have the most delicious kiss of his life.

 Chan looks at him suspiciously.

“Yeah, you’ve been a little weird ever since you and Seungmin ‘interrogated’ her.” Hyunjin adds.

“Yeah, man. And what was that back in the gang bang?” Changbin joins in.

“The fuck you talking about?” Growls Minho.

“Gees, someone’s sensitive.” Hyunjin mumbles.

“I’m talking about how soft you were with her. You barely said a fucking word, then you fucked her so… so gently. That wasn’t in her request list.” Changbin replies.

Everyone turns to MInho and he feels the cogs in their heads turning. 

“Well, Minho is good at picking up what people need, especially without them saying anything.” Offers Felix.

“That’s right.” Reiterates Chan sternly, staring directly at Minho.

Minho shifts awkwardly in his seat, feeling caught out.

“Fine. I just think he was a little too soft, that's all.” Changbin grumbles, settling back into his seat.

“Okay, boys.” Chan claps, signaling it’s time to move on. “I know we’ve only just finished our contract with Y/n, but I wanted to take the opportunity to discuss our next client and their requests.” 

But Minho is barely listening. His mind keeps going back to you. Back to the way your lips felt against his own. The way your tongue sought his. The way you hooked a leg over his arm, seeking friction against your sweet little pussy. Fuck. Focus.

“So we have several women requesting two of us at once, and a couple are just after one. I thought we could divvy up the contracts and conduct them over the same few days.”

Everyone nods in agreement. It makes sense, that way if another client seeks five or six of them then they will have availability. 

“Okay. The first is a request for two doctors. I think Seungmin and Jeongin would be good for that, yes?” He looks up at the pair and they both nod. Neither of them are new to that role. “Then a request for a fae themed scenario. I’m thinking we could use that cabin in the woods, the one we used for the kidnapping one, yeah? Felix, I think you’d be perfect.”

”No worries. I’ll get the place ready, and I’m pretty sure I saw the perfect costume online.” He makes a note on his phone to follow up.

“Good, make sure it can be sent express post. Um, a vampire request. Hyunjin?” he looks up at him and Hyunjin nods in acceptance. 

“Then there’s this one I quote ‘threesome where one guy is in me and another guy in him.’”

“Ooo ooo me!” Jisung raises his hand enthusiastically, almost jumping out of his seat.

“Alright, Jisung. Who else is happy to assist?”

Jisung turns to Minho. “Please, hyung!!! Be my partner!” He bats his eyelids at him.

“Fine.” Minho rolls his eyes. Actually he is secretly glad he does’t have to directly fuck another woman so soon after you.

“Yes!” Jisung fist pumps the air.

“Lastly, a personal trainer fantasy. Bin, you and I can take that one. Okay, everyone will receive emails with the full details, so make sure you read them thoroughly, and converse with your partner if you have one. Good job, boys. Enjoy your time off, and see you soon.”

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I wonder if she likes cats? Minho is still thinking about you when he lets himself into his apartment and is greeted by his fur baby. “Hey, Soonie,” he says, squatting down and patting his cat. “You miss me, huh? It’s okay, Daddy’s home now.” 

He potters around his apartment, putting on a load of clothes washing, vacuuming, and then cooking himself a meal. All while trying not to look at his phone where he now has your phone number he stole from your file. 

At some point while he’s cooking, he finds his phone in his hand and is staring at the number.

Is it too soon to call you? Of course it is. What kind of desperate fool are you?

He sighs and locks his phone, setting it back on the countertop and resumes stirring his pot of sauce. Maybe he could ask you over for a meal? His eyes drift back to his phone. Stop. No. Fuck. You are driving him crazy. He shuts his phone away in a kitchen drawer and goes to eat his dinner.

After successfully ignoring the strong pull coming from the kitchen drawer, Minho takes a shower, rubs one out to the thought of you on the interrogation table, then settles down on his couch to open his laptop.

He sighs and rubs his eyes, willing himself to focus, while Soonie decides it's the perfect time for pats. “What a cute little pussy, hmm.” Minho coos as it tries to climb onto his laptop as he reads the notes for his upcoming threesome. But it’s not long until his eyes drift towards his kitchen, to where his phone is still sitting in the drawer.

“Fuck it”. He says, sliding out from under his cat. He can’t think of anything else but messaging or calling you. He can’t focus on this next assignment. Fuck, he could barely think about his dinner without his mind drifting off to wondering how your sweet cunt would taste.

He doesn’t care if he looks desperate. Fuck, he is desperate. He opens the drawer and pulls out his phone, and after taking a deep, grounding breath, he dials your number.

>>>>>>>>>>>>

‘Resisted arrest. Force required to detain the suspect. However, once handcuffed she was extremely enthusiastic to obey. Her mouth was very skilled and cunt was cooperative.’ - Changbin

‘I will be keeping an eye on her to ensure she is arrested and questioned for any criminal activity she becomes involved in.’ - Minho

‘The suspect was easily coerced into double penetration, climaxing multiple times. She was displeased when we removed our penises from her to restrain her to the ceiling chains, but settled once we were back inside her.

The suspect is the most responsive we have encountered so far, and is definitely a favorite.’ - Hyunjin

‘How we ended up with the prettiest suspect in the world I will never know! Her pussy is the most perfect I have ever felt. So tight, warm and soaking wet.’ Han

‘CONCERNS: Detective Lee Minho.’ - Chan

“Fucking hell.” You whistle low, closing the police report. “Chief Chan is concerned with Minho?” you mumble to yourself. Was he not acting his usual self with you? Did the Chi-, Chan, know about the kiss?

You have done absolutely nothing since arriving home from the police station several hours ago. Except for looking through your file and reliving all those beautiful cocks that filled you up perfectly. You’re still buzzing from the entire experience, and you’re not quite ready to come back to reality. 

You flick to the photos Felix took of you. He was right, they are beautiful. Erotic even. You bite your lip as your eyes run over your bruises, bites marks, and injuries. You feel a pulsing sensation in your core. You need to touch yourself. Already? You say to your pussy, looking down in disbelief.

You gather all the items you need - a vibrating anal plug, lube, and your thickest dildo, and climb into bed. You moan when you press a lubed finger to your ass. As usual, it doesn’t take long until you’ve slipped a finger inside, preparing yourself to take the plug. Once you deem yourself ready, you push the plug inside and turn on the vibrator. Your breath quickens as the stretch, fullness and vibrations combined begin to send you feral.

You play with your clit. Rough, fast motions, all while your mind visualizes the photographs Felix took. You’re going to come hard and fast, but you want to prolong it. You slow your fingers right down to rubbing lazy circles on your clit, allowing your body to calm down.

You reach for the dildo and drench it in lube. Not that you need it, your pussy is absolutely dripping in arousal. You open your legs wider and push the dildo deep into your vagina. You cry out at the intrusion, your walls barely having time to adjust before you’re pulling it out and ramming it back inside you. Again, harder. You whimper from the pleasure-pain. You reach behind you and increase the speed of the anal vibrator, then you start to tug on it, stretching your anus slightly.

“Fuck!” You moan, feeling yourself about to climax. “Close. So fucking close.” You babble to yourself. You’re almost there. The point of no return. Your body tenses, your legs shake.

Your phone rings.

Your eyes shoot open and you grab your phone. Minho! A video call? Fuck. You scramble to sit up, fix your hair, and forgetting you are naked, you answer the phone.

Minho’s eyes almost pop out of his head, but he recovers quickly. “Nice tits, kitten.” He smirks.

Your arm quickly comes to cover yourself. 

“Hey, it’s not like I haven’t seen absolutely everything.” He teases. “Anyway, I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time - actually, what are you doing? You’re all flushed.” His eyes narrow.

“Nothing!” You squeak. 

“I don’t believe you.” he quips.

“Okay, fine I was masturbating.” You roll your eyes.

“Really? Already? Aren’t you sore?” 

“Nope. I'm fine.”

“Show me.”

“What?” You say shocked.

“I said show me.” He repeats seriously.

Nervously, You position the camera so he can see how wet you are.

“Fuck! You’ve got a plug in. Have you come yet?” He says in disbelief.

“Nope. Was almost there when you called. It’s like you knew.” You pouted.

“Oh kitten. Fuck. Such a good girl waiting for me before coming. Or is it you can’t come without me, hmm?”

“S’hard to come without someone watching.” You sulk, playing along.

“Fuck! Lucky I called. Go on. Play with yourself.”

You start to rub your clit again. Every so often you dip your fingers inside you to gather some wetness then bring it up to your clit.

“Have you got something you can fuck yourself with?” Minho says in a deep voice. 

You reach for your thick dildo and resume fucking yourself like you were doing earlier.

“Deeper. Wanna see you take it deeper.” Minho instructs. 

You want to obey, be a good girl for him, so you push the dildo in further so it hits your cervix on every thrust. “Need to come, Minho. Need to come.” You cry, thrusting into yourself frantically. “S’close..”

“I can hear how wet you are, kitten. That’s it, rub your clit. Good girl. I want you to imagine that’s me inside you.”

“Oh, God. Oh, fuck!” You whimper. “Let me come.”

“Scream for me, y/n.”

You explode into a million pieces, screaming, just as Minho demanded. Your body shakes for what feels like an eternity as waves upon waves of pleasure wash over you.

Eventually, you collapse on your mattress in exhaustion, your chest rising and falling rapidly as you try and catch your breath.

“Fuck. You alright?” Minho laughs softly.

“No.” You choke. “So intense.”

“Well, glad I got to see that. Luckily I called when I did.”

“Why did you call?” You pick up your phone so you can look at him.

He runs his hands through his hair. “Oh yeah. So, um, the reason I actually called was to see if you maybe wanted to come over for dinner one night?”

You’re taken by surprise. Minho wants to have dinner with you?

“I mean, it’s okay if you don’t. It’s probably not wh-”

“I’d love to.” You smile.

“Yeah?” He says in disbelief.

“Yeah.”

>>>>>>

“This looks delicious, Minho. You have lots of skills it seems.” You say grinning at the plate of pasta and bolognese in front of you. Your eyes almost roll back into your head when you take a bite. “Oh my god. This is fucking amazing!” you say with a mouthful of food. “Did you make the pasta from scratch?”

Minho smiles triumphantly. “Yes. The sauce too. Glad you like it.”

“It’s delicious.”  You grin and try your best to not scoff the entire plate down in one mouthful. 

“You look beautiful tonight.” He says gazing at you. You feel a heat flush over you. You aren’t particularly dressed up, opting for a nice top and denim shorts. You hoped it would be suitable enough for the occasion.

“Thank you. I think it’s the first time you’ve seen me in clothing?” You laugh. “You look good too.” You notice his cheeks flush a little.

“So,” You put your fork down. “How is it you came to be in your…um…profession?” You ask curiously.

Minho sits back in his chair, and pauses in thought. “Well, Chan started the business with Jisung - Han - and Changbin. Business grew quicker than they expected and so they needed to hire more staff.”

“Interesting. But what made you join?” You lean your elbows on the table, resting your chin in your hands. You’re curious to know more.

“Hmm. I suppose I thought it would make life easier, sexually speaking. It’s hard to find a partner that wants both a sex life like mine and also a sickly sweet romantic dynamic. It was too confusing for my previous partners. The ones I could see myself having a future with were put off by my tendencies. So I joined the group and got my satisfaction there. And it’s thrilling to please client’s who share similar desires. It really is.”

“But what about the sickly sweet romance? You don’t get that in the job.”

Minho shrugs. “I guess not. But at least I don’t keep being rejected by women this way.”

You can’t believe how anyone could reject Minho. He is kind and thoughtful. Very domesticated. You look around at his tidy home and then at the meal on your plate. But you get what he means. You know it too well.

“So have you got your next contract?” You ask, wiggling your eyebrows.

He cracks a huge grin. “Yeah. I do.”

“Well? What is it? What do you have to do?” Your eyes widen with enthusiasm.

“Hey, hey, Kitten.” He holds his hands up in a bid to calm you down. “That’s confidential.”

“Oh come on, it’s not like I know them. Please.” You bat your eyelids.

“Okay, fine. It’s a threesome.” he concedes.

“A threesome? Yes, go ahead. Tell me more..” You gesture for him to continue.

“The exact wording of the brief is ‘I want someone in me, and someone inside him.’ Okay maybe that wasn’t the exact wording, but you get the gist.”

Your mouth hangs open in excitement. “So you’re telling me—”

“Jisung’s going to be in the client’s vagina, and I am going to be in Jisung’s ass.” He states.

“Woah! So you guys fuck each other too?” You shriek.

“Sometimes.” 

“Wait! I could’ve asked for you to fuck each other? Oh man, no one told me that.” You sit back and scowl.

“Well, you’ll have to book us again.” He teases.

“I just might. So who have you fucked in the group?” You ask excitedly, taking another mouthful of pasta.

“Jisung, a few times. Chan too.” He says matter of fact.

“Chan?! No way! Has anyone fucked you?” You say with your mouth full.

“Chan. Seungmin.”

“Seungmin?” You almost choke.

“It was an experience. Although you know perfectly well how he likes to fuck an ass.”

You nod laughing, then falling quiet as the image of Seungmin inside Minho flashes through your mind. Jisung too. He’d look so pretty being ruined by Minho.

“Are you okay?” He asks, trying to meet your gaze.

“Yeah. Just trying to work out my next fantasy request for you guys. I quite like the idea of someone in me, someone in them, another in my mouth, then everyone else inside each other.”

“Do you now? I might have to keep a mental note of that.” Minho’s eyes sparkle deviously.

>>>>

“That really was a delicious meal, Minho. Thank you for cooking.” You say placing your empty plate by the sink. “Would you like me to lend a hand washing up?” You start looking for dishwashing detergent and sponges.

Minho’s arms wrap around you from behind and he nuzzles his mouth into your neck. You smile at the warm gesture. 

“I’d like you to lend a hand with something else.” He whispers against your ear. “But first.” He spins you around and presses your back against the bench. “I’ve been dying to kiss these lips all night.” he smashes down on you in a heated kiss, setting your insides on fire.

He pulls back to peel your top off over your head and throws it to the side. Then he’s unclasping your bra with skilled fingers, and that’s gone from your body in a matter of moments.

You suck in a breath as he leans down to take a nipple in his mouth, nipping at it rough and urgently. Your head lolls back and you sigh. Your hands find the top of his head, weaving your fingers through his hair and pulling him closer. He bites down hard on your nipple and you whimper. Your core throbs for more of his roughness.

He comes up for air, a smear of blood across his lip, and kisses you wildly. “Turn around.” He growls, turning you so you’re facing away from him. Reaching into a drawer, he pulls out a pair of handcuffs and tugs on your arms so they are above your head. He threads the cuffs through the overhead cupboard handle and attaches them to your wrists. You tug on the restraints, but they are extremely secure, and now you are at the mercy of Detective Minho.

“Look at you.” He whispers as he cups a breast and squeezes it. “Looks like you need questioning again, hmm?” he snarls and your cunt squeezes.

Silently, he moves to the pantry, scanning the shelves. He nods when he finds what he’s looking for, a bottle of fractionated coconut oil. He takes it from the shelf and returns to resume his interrogation.

He sets the bottle of oil on the countertop and crouches behind you to yank your shorts and panties down your legs. He guides you step out of them. Leaving you naked and chained to his kitchen cupboard. 

You poke your ass out as he slides his palms up the backs of your thighs, finding their grip on your cheeks and spreading you wide. You’re dripping wet. You know it. You can feel it, and the grunt that Minho emits tells you he knows you're soaking. The need for him to touch you is too great and you make some pathetic noise. But he simply stands back up, leaving your deprived pussy untouched.

He reaches into the kitchen drawer again, pulling out a silicone spatula and places that next to the oil. Then to your delight he strips off his own clothes so he is naked too. You lick your lips and take in the magnificent form that is Lee Minho.

“Oh you like that, hmm? Too bad you’re unable to touch me.” He smirks as he unscrews the bottle of coconut oil and applies some to his hands.

You moan as he runs his oiled hands down your back and over your ass, then whimper as he kneads the skin near your hips. He repeats the motion, slicking up your body with the oil and massaging your breasts and eventually your pussy. 

“Fuck! Yes. Min. God.” You choke when he slides a finger inside you. You grind back against him, only for him to remove his hand and leave you empty. Your eyes follow his hand as it grasps the handle of the spatula, then you feel him dragging it down your spine.

Slap!

He hits you hard on your ass. You moan, digging your teeth into your lip. 

He gently strokes you with the spatula to sooth the skin, then he pulls it back.

Slap!

He massages the red skin with his free hand. 

“God, so fucking red. So pretty.”

Slap!

You cry out louder, the sting so much more harsh than the last.

And again. Slap! 

You whimper, your legs feeling like jelly.

Minho is about to land another blow when a voice from the living room interrupts you.

You both freeze.

“Hey, Hyung? I had an idea for our — Woah!” Jisung stops in his tracks as he rounds the corner into the kitchen. “Oh fuck I’m sorry! I didn’t realize…wait… Y/n? Is that you?” His eyes narrow as you turn your head sheepishly. 

“Hi Han, Jisung? Can I call you that?” You smile, like nothing is happening.

Jusung blinks rapidly. Then he looks at Minho who is standing in the middle of the kitchen naked and outraged, and then back at you. Finally his gaze settles on your bright red bottom.

“Yah!” Yells Minho, throwing a tea towel over your rear end to try to offer some sort of coverage.

“Hyung, Man, it’s not like I haven’t seen all of her before. Hey! Actually, what is she doing here?” Jisung’s tone turns accusatory.

Minho glares at him. It’s all it takes for Jisung to concede. He throws his hands up “Okay, I’m leaving. Even though it looks like a lot of fun and�� you know I could sit on the floor underneath her… suck her clit while you continue doing your dominant thing… No? Okay. Well. I’ll go. Bye Y/n.” He waves at you. 

“Bye, Jisung. Lovely to see you again.” You wink at him and the tea towel slips off, giving the stunned man a last view of you before Minho is ushering him out.

“You did that on purpose, kitten.” He growls, returning to the kitchen and pulling your head back by your hair. “Bet you wanted me to let him stay, huh?” 

“No…of course not. Just want you.” You whine. The reality though, is that you would have loved to feel Jisung’s mouth against your pussy. You close your eyes at the thought and squeeze your legs together.

Minho notices it and scoffs. “I know you’re lying. Which means… punishment.”

Once again he goes to the kitchen draw, this time taking out a wooden spoon and silicone coated tongs. Your eyes widen. 

“Five. You’ll receive five strikes with the wooden spoon. If you say orange or red, I stop immediately.” He gives his hand an experimental slap with the item. “Then,” he picks up the tongs, holding them in the air and letting them spring open.

You cunt clenches. The fact that Minho remembers you have a stretch kink makes your heart beat faster.  

He makes his way behind you and you prepare yourself for the wooden spoon.

“You have to count for me.” He states.

He brings the wooden spoon down onto your already sore ass with a hard slap. Your legs almost give way. “One.” you cry.

He strikes you again and again. A loud slap fills the room each time the wood makes contact with your skin. Tears stream down your face and you can barely count, each number coming out like a choked sob. 

“F-five.” You cry out the final number.

Minho returns the wooden spoon to the bench, then holds you in his arms. His hard, naked body against yours is comforting, his words of praise are soothing.

“Good girl. You took that so well.” He whispers, kissing your shoulder and massaging where he’d spanked you. “How was it? Not too much?” he checks in with you. “How are you feeling?”

“S’good..S’wet…Aching…p-pussy needs filling up. Need to come.” you babble.

Minho chuckles, his eyes smiling with admiration. “I’ll make sure you’re taken care of. One last thing before I fuck you. I know you can take it.”

He drizzles the end of the tongs with oil, then crouches down behind you. He holds the tongs closed and runs them through your glistening labia. You let out a moan. Then he catches your clit. He allows the tongs to open just enough so can capture it, pinching it hard. 

Jolts of arousal shoot through you and you cry out.

Then you feel the tongs at your entrance and you automatically push your ass out further, giving Minho more access. Keeping the tongs closed, he slides them inside you. You must look so filthy with a pair of kitchen utensils shoved up your vagina. 

He’s not gentle when he fucks you with them. He’s messy, sloppy, rough, but he manages to find your g-spot every time. You’re surely about to come, but he slows down, bringing the tongs to a standstill. You whimper, frustrated from having your orgasm stolen from you. Then you feel it. The tongs opening inside you. 

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” You cry.

“Color?”

“Green. Fucking green.” You scream.

He chuckles as he scissors you open. 

“Fuck.” He hisses. His free hand spreads your cheek wide. “Pussy’s so good when it’s stretched like this.”

“Maybe you should’ve been a doctor.” You pant.

“Sometimes I am darlin’. You wait till I use a real speculum on this pretty cunt. Open you right up so I can see inside.”

His fingers land on your clit. The added sensation has you on the verge of release. “Minho… please. Need to come.” You beg.

“Yeah? Pussy needs to come, huh? Do it.” He starts an onslaught of scissoring then thrusting, while his deft fingers on your clit tighten that coil inside you.

You're perspiring, shaking, sobbing as you’re thrown off the precipice in an earth shattering orgasm.

“That’s it. Making a mess for me. Mmm… can hardly move these tongs you’re gripping so tight.”

You can’t even respond, your panting and shivering so hard, barely able to stand.

He eases the utensil out of you, tossing them into the kitchen sink, along with the items he used to cook for you earlier, then he’s lining himself up to your entrance.

“Just relax for me. Yes… fuck yes… that’s my girl… let me in…” he pushes himself all the way inside you. You welcome the smooth silky hardness against your walls, and he slides in and out with ease, despite your tight grip on him. 

Holding onto your hips he fucks into you harder until he’s built up a brutal pace that reminds you of when you were in the interrogation room. Except this time, he leans his body against your back and massages your breasts, caresses your stomach, and plants hot wet kisses anywhere his mouth can reach.

The roughness and the softness combined sends all sorts of unfamiliar feelings through your body. You like it, it feels good, and you feel tears pricking your eyes. You’re going to come again. Any second now the tension is going to snap.

“You take me so well, Kitten. It's like you were made for me.”

That does it. You come hard around his cock with a loud wailing sound. He fucks you through it, chasing his own orgasm. “Gonna fill you. Gonna fill this perfect little cunt. My cunt.” He slams into you, almost knocking you off your feet then pulls out. He quickly works on freeing your wrists, turning you and lifting you up. Your legs wrap around his waist as he impales you on his cock, fucking you whilst he makes his way to the dining table.

He lays you down on the table, and starts to slam into you hard again. His rhythm is hard, fast, and so so deep. “Gonna fill you..” he growls as he throws his head back and empties himself inside you. He stills, but you can still feel him pulsing and filling you to the brim.

He leans over you, collapsing on your chest, and you bring your arms around him, holding him silently for a few minutes.

“Let’s go wash you.” He says eventually, pulling himself out, picking you up and carrying you to the bathroom.

Once the temperature of the water is comfortable, he helps you climb in with him and proceeds to wash your body.

It isn’t long until you’ve regained your composure and are able to stand steady on your feet. It’s only now that you can take in the man before you. You take the sponge from him, lather it up with body wash and start to wash his body. With a look of surprise and a hint of hesitation, he lets out an exhale and allows you to wash him.

He watches you as you run the sponge over his chest, down his torso, and drop to your knees in front of him. You swear you hear him whimper when your eyes land on his cock.

You drop the sponge and place your hands on his strong thighs. You need him in your mouth. He cups your cheek, tilting your head up to meet his gaze, and through hooded eyelids you silently seek permission to take care of him. He releases your chin and lets out a shaky breath when you wrap your hand around the base of his semi erect cock. Slowly, you lick the length of the underside. Then swirl your tongue around the tip. He grows rapidly, and it has you dying to choke on it.

Minho simply stands still while you work his cock, providing absolutely no help. But that doesn’t deter you. Or slow you down. You decide you’re going to choke on him all by yourself. You pop off with a plop, fill your lungs with air, then take him fully into your mouth. Cupping his delicious ass cheeks with your hands, you pull him towards you while you bob your head up and down his shaft. 

You hear his breath become heavier, and a hand wraps around your wet hair, his other he rests against the tiled wall behind you. 

“Look at you. So hungry for cock, you’re choking yourself.” He purrs. “I’m close… fuck, im so close.” His hips begin to press forwards, pushing his dick further into your throat. He cums quickly, spurting thick ropes cum into your mouth. “Holy shit!” He chokes as he empties himself.

After you’ve milked him of every drop and swallowed him down, he pulls you back to your feet. He looks almost bewildered when he looks into your eyes. “Y/n. How are you so perfect for me?” He whispers. 

You swallow hard. You’re thinking something similar about him. Instead, you shrug. “Well I’m not sure detective. Maybe you’ll have to investigate further?” you quip.

He chuckles. “Maybe it's better to just go with it and not question it.”

You nod in agreement. “Let’s not overthink it, then.”

You both dry off, and Minho leads you to his bed, a big King size bed with black sheets and a black quilt. 

“Oh, you’re not sending me on my way?” You tease.

”Fuck no. I need…need to hold you.” He says softly, pulling you onto the bed with him.

He falls asleep quickly with his arms around you and your head on his chest. His steady breath is soothing as his chest rises and falls. You’re not sure what is happening, how this man seems to be able to fill so many of your needs, or how easy he is to be around. Yet here you are, and you’re thankful you took a chance with the sex fantasy agency. 

Your thoughts shift to Minho’s next assignment. Jisung in some woman’s cunt, and Minho in Jisung. Fuck, that sounds like a dream. Then your mind goes to Jisung walking in on you and Minho earlier. What would have happened if Minho asked him to stay?

You sigh, feeling confused. You've got strong feelings for Minho, yet you feel yourself grow wet at the thought of Jisung, and the rest of them.

You find Minho’s hand and thread your fingers through his. That’ll be a problem for future you. Right now you’re ready to fall asleep in the arms of someone that finally accepts you for who you are.

>>>>>>

@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @fun-fanfics @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @justforreaders @melochacco @scenuniverse @oddracha @galaxycatdrawz @jiminssluttyminx @kayleefriedchicken @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @dool-set-net @redstayrosie @mintymintmint251 @katsukis1wife @delulustardust @eastjonowhere

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[eliossun]

LAST SHOT - first meet

synopsis : interning at a random ship in space sounds like a great idea for your paper. don't you think? part -> 1 2 3 ?

characters : anya, swansea, daisuke, curly, jimmy, gn!reader (daisuke x reader if u squint)

content : filler. lots of filler. lots of people being people. the series is sort of a fix it fic (?) only warning is mention of.. jimmy... eugh

wc : 3.4k+

before you read, reader is : cold, non expressive, and a psychology major...

close to an oc.. but also not an oc? features of the reader is never described, and i wrote it as gender neutral as possible

- you were an intern in the pink pony express.

- .. more specifically, a university student with honours in their bachelor's degree in psychology. you did plan on going back to get a masters once you're done with this internship. the pay wasn't much, but since it covered your living expenses for a year, and since the internship being valid enough to put into a research paper (after confirming there's psychological tests in the ship) you say this wouldn't be so bad. 

- ..or so you thought.

- the first day you boarded the ship, you were baffled by the lack of security measures of what, or what you can't bring to the spaceship. sure there were manuals, but the actual boarding of the ship? no security, at all.

- you knew the conditions that the company puts their employees in from online forums.. so you tried to prepare beforehand with a backpack. woo! (it took you hours to recount your basic needs)

- you managed to sneak on board your little backpack (it was huge) and thankfully, you managed to stash it away in your room before anyone else noticed. 

- .. and thankfully the directions were easy to read as well, otherwise you'd be lost.

- you don't want to bring all that around the tour of the ship either, so this would be the most efficient solution.

- pretending to be waiting in front of the ship unnoticed was also easy. however, imagine the surprise when another intern trips into the spaceship, last second.

- the captain - you find his name to be curly, only managed to give you a brief welcome, before asking the nurse of the ship - she introduced herself as anya - to show you around.

- whilst going around, the other intern tried to start conversations with you. which briefly went as follows:

"hey! my name's daisuke, yours?" 

"y/n."

"woah! cool name!"

"..."

"..not much of a talker...it seems... hehe.."

- you only nod in response. 

- anya seems to have read the room, and immediately guided you away to introduce you to two other people instead. swansea the mechanic, and jimmy, the copilot.

- however the atmosphere persisted. you stayed in silence most of the time. daisuke was close to starting another conversation with you, but seemed to back out last second.

- you feel rather bad for being cold towards him. but your body is way too exhausted to respond. maybe you should’ve brought some painkillers as well..

- ... or perhaps you could pay off your sleep debt on this trip as well. ahh… a faithful wish..

- that aside, you also found out you would be interning under anya. she was soft spoken, and overall, you have a feeling that you wouldn't mind sticking by her side for the next.. year.. or so.

- having a singular nurse for a 6-man crew isn't too bad. but now with her teaching you the basics, you think that you’re capable of taking some of her responsibilities. (you're glad to take some weight off her back)

- you agreed on weekly psych checks with the crew (much to swansea’s and jimmy’s dismay) so you’re ready to keep your journal very, very filled.

- the routine was simple. you'd wake up, check your stash of items which included - airtight sealed snacks which consisted of a lot of sweets, your journal, a lot of thrifted power banks for your ds to charge on, your ds of course, a taser, a gun, and a personal emotional support voicemail on one of your mp3 player - then go into the lounge for breakfast, and finally, follow anya around for the rest of your day.

- sometimes you would bump into swansea and daisuke while you're passing by the utility room. and sometimes daisuke stops you for a small talk

- you eventually warm up to him. he's awfully smiley for someone close to your age, then you find out he doesn't go to college, and your question was quickly answered. 

- after a bit more small talk, you realise that you both were from the same town (what a small world)

- he mentions that he missed eating a specific candy - it’s called sunshines, silly name, you know - which you could only get from the bakery near your town, and you look away, fully knowing that you had the same candy in your bag.

- .. oh well. maybe another time.

- your interactions with swansea was rather limited.

- you both see each other and simply choose to ignore each other's existence.

- perhaps it's a part of you that sees through him. and he sees through you too. 

- silent understanding is a better word, perhaps. 

- you both only talked on the few occasions where you were there to take your psychology evaluation tests. he keeps complaining about daisuke and whatnot - but you know that look in his eyes. that’s not hate.

- after a while, he stops complaining - resorting to grunts and short answers. perhaps tired of attempting to trick you.

- quick yet blunt. the way you prefer things to be.

- you sometimes offer to read out daisuke’s psych test to him. only the parts where you deem as okay to say, though. mostly parts where you ask how his internships are, and him answering with praises towards swansea. 

- swansea refuses each time, but you read some of them anyway. when daisuke complains about swansea though, you read out his response to "how was your day". which mainly consisted of his joys of the day.

- swansea pretends he doesn't like it. once again, you know that look in his eyes.

- you thought he would be done with acting around you, but you suppose, ego can't be beaten sometimes

- you really like their father-son-like dynamic. you just hope daisuke doesn't let the old man's words get to him.

- after doing curly's and jimmy's psych test (jimmy needed a lot of convincing in order for him to take these seriously) you find that they were friends that go way, way back.

- you're unsure if curly could see it, but you could tell that jimmy admires him. that man admires curly a bit too much. you're familiar with situations like these. you just hope it won't tip towards envy. oh who you were kidding - it's almost too late now.

- you finally realise why you felt uncomfortable around jimmy after the first month.

- the envy and self depreciation is overwhelming, and you truly applaud anyone who holds a conversation for longer than five minutes. (maybe you should applaud yourself as well)

- self destruction is the only path he’s going towards, and you would help him if he wasn’t so.. stubborn. for a lack of a better word.

- but overall, this trip isn't too bad so far. right?

- its been a month and a half. 

- you and anya had formed some sort of sibling relationship..? 

- it started with her seeing one of your stickers you had placed on one of your items, and her nostalgia of having them on her cup as well.

- you both began to talk more from there. continuous stories about your daily life (which isn’t the most pleasant) but you got to know each other better from there.

- you were immediately stunned at her determination and passion for nursing. - and perhaps, after this all, you could plausibly send a recommendation in for her. 

- you didn’t tell her that, of course. you weren’t able to guarantee it, and you wouldn’t want to give false hope.

- you find that she was incredibly good at games after you lent her your ds. and all of sudden, her competitiveness on game board nights didn’t look so out of place after all.

- she had encouraged you to get out of your shell.. despite many protests from you. (it.. sort of works…?)

- curly, after more interactions, seems to be a great guy. great leader, optimistic despite.. well. everything else, really. you’d be miserable if you had to live outside of earth half your life.

- the very brief interactions you have with him were pleasant. 

- a bit concerning to think he’s carrying all this responsibility for all these years though. perhaps a little rest could do - is what you said.

- he only responded with a chuckle, and a ‘it is what it is’.

- there isn’t any other response you would’ve expected from him, anyway.

- you just hope that once he does find the end of this career, he’ll find something more.. lighter.

- maybe a baker. maybe a craftsman. maybe something else entirely, all you know that this whole leadership thing might end up causing him more harm than good.

- which is what jimmy turned out to be. 

- whenever it’s your turn to do jimmy’s evaluations, you always groan a bit. 

- you show a bit of interest, and he goes the mile to talk about himself. not quite boasting - but very much putting others beneath his shoes to seem… “relatable” to you.

- you only nod. you give him a small phrase from time to time, but otherwise - it’s all nods.

- the issue with jimmy is not his current state itself. sure, it’s annoying and insufferable - but what’s dangerous is next stage of what people like him become.

- envious. greedy - dangerous. you wouldn’t trust him even if it kills you.

- and so you don’t. you try to keep a wary gaze on him.

- another thing you find that swansea is quite similar to .. other people in your neighbourhood.

- he talks about how he’s been struggling with alcohol, on a particularly hard night.

- you listen. he keeps talking. you add on his statements a little bit from time to time, to show that you’re listening. otherwise, you’re dead quiet, eyes staring at him, and his eyes towards the false sky by the medical bed. 

- he complains to you more than anything though. about.. nearly everything. about how daisuke won’t do this properly, about the food for dinner, about him being unable to see his wife at home, how he won’t be able to see his kids grow up, and you, in exchange, tell a bit about yourself.

- he understands you; and you understand him too. you were both trapped under the same situation at the start of your lives, and you, by chance, managed to escape. 

- he makes a joke about it. it leaves a bittersweet taste in your mouth. 

- …although.. this meant that you were a bit privileged in the way swansea treated you. 

- this showed in the way that he allows you to mess with his toolbox (maybe you were the only other person who was interested in his toolbox, aside from daisuke..) 

- he teaches you the basics, and daisuke often chimes in from what he had studied before from swansea as well.

- you often thank the two for the lesson, and swansea seems a bit more smug after, whilst daisuke seems more proud of himself.. and due to that, you are more than welcome in the utility room.. from time to time.

- ah, speaking of daisuke..

- he’s incredibly sweet. you wonder if he particularly needs the sweets anymore from how overly sweet he is. you do end up sharing your snacks either way, and thankfully, he’s obedient enough to only request one sunshine every one to two days. (at this rate, you might have just enough to last you the entire.. 9 months? close to 8 now..) 

- he also plays games, and showed you his own ds, stickers of pokemon, doodles, and small little things indicating his other interests were plastered all over it - which you end up telling anya. 

- this is where anya’s willingness to help you connect with others come in. 

- not before long, you, anya, and daisuke managed to make a post-game night activity.. which included playing the ds until you all reach the specific curfew anya had set (thankfully, she did set one, otherwise daisuke would’ve tried to beat you until his fingers fell off.)

- there was one time that he was too tired, and you had to drag him back into his room. with an arm slinged around your shoulder, and anya following behind in your footsteps, he stayed asleep the entire time.

- he wasn’t drunk. hell, do you even have alcohol in the ship? the answer was no. unless you were to drink cleaning alcohol.. but point is. he didn’t get drunk, and he was just that tired. you wonder what kind of new training he’s been trying to do.

- you tried your best to drag him, but once you were beside his bed, you had only one choice.

- you slowly placed him back into his bed, lifting his leg up to remove his shoes - before placing him properly on the bed.

- anya had already excused herself back to her room, and with the silence (and occasional snores from daisuke), you find yourself observing daisuke’s room.

- pink weights, a very, very patterned backpack, and a charger. those were the main things that caught your eyes. 

- .. and you had his ds in your hand. so out of kindness, you went over to plug in his ds for him.

- before you left him alone, you checked up on him for the last time. he’s sleeping soundly. you try to close the door as silently as possible.

- you hope he continues to dream tonight.

- so far the worst thing you had to witness from the male was the absolute mess that was his laundry pile. 

- it started when you - whose room was beside daisuke’s - smelt something akin to the concentrated scent of the (sun) detergent.

- you knocked at his door, and only a muffled wait echoes inside, before you could hear him tripping over his own feet to open the door.

his eyes meet yours - looking quite frazzled. He’s heaving slightly, perhaps a side effect of rushing to get the door.

“h..hi!”

the detergent smell only got stronger, and it became very much obvious that he.. had a little accident with the laundry. your focus flickers between the mess he is, and the mess behind him.

“...did anything happen?”

he chuckles nervously, avoiding eye contact.

“oooff course not! and i almost forgot that i had to- uhm- change my sheets! so see ya soo-”

right as he was about to shut the door, you had kept it wedged open with your shoes. his eyes actually meet yours, again, and you tilt your head slightly, arms folding.

“i can smell it from the hallway. let me help you.”

“no- i can do it!”

you send him a particular stare. it seems to make him falter, and you sigh once more.

“let me help you.”

he looks hesitant, his grip on the handle weakening. a moment passes, and then he closes hie eyes, and smiles at you - defeated.

“alright then... but don't be angry!”

- as you step in the room, you’re met with the sight of.. very, very many bubbles on a stack of clothes. 

- and when you look back at daisuke, he only offers you a guilty grin, and a look that said i told you so

- that’s the story of how your fingers managed to smell like detergent for a whole week, and the event that hallmarked your almost instant closeness with daisuke.

- ever since the laundry accident, you two have been together quite often.

- every lunch break was simply just sitting alone, until anya or daisuke approaches you. If anya approached first, then daisuke followed. if anya couldn’t join you in the lounge, then you’d go to the medical bay, and if you’re allowed in - daisuke would follow right after.

- everytime you manage to get spare time to lounge on the extended sofa, daisuke immediately joins you. the only difference from before was the way he joins you on the couch. sometimes by closing your eyes from behind and asking you to guess (even when it’s apparent), sometimes by jumping or launching himself to the spot beside you.

- every now and then, he scares the living soul out of you. he laughs until you start chasing him with a cup in your hand.

- he tries his best to make you laugh. the best he got so far was an amused stare from you.

- apparently, it’s good enough for him. he cheered the entire night you made that expression.

- on his psych tests, he talks a lot.

- there’s.. not much time to talk to you. you only realise once he starts to talk about his week, instead of his day. 

- nowadays, you focus on getting your analysis done. how each person’s behaviour have changed - in general, of course. you’re not going to mention their every detail, and rather, you ask them to fill out little questionnaires (which is the only detail you’re submitting)

- usually, before you got close, he mainly talks about his day, and only his day. 

- sure you spent a lot of time together, but since this was the only chance to be truly alone, it’s usually the time that he opens up.

- he barely does so. but it’s much easier to see his emotions on his face, with far more vulnerability. 

- it starts from little things, like how he really thinks swansea might get tired of teaching him. or maybe the way jimmy got mad at him because he accidentally spilled oil on his shirt. 

- then it turns to things in his house. how he missed his mother, how he missed seeing his cat, how he felt like he had to take this internship because he felt like he had to prove something.

- you offer him hugs from time to time. he accepts them. 

- sometimes you feel tears soak into your shirt. you try your best to comfort him after. whether it would be rubbing circles into his back, or offering him an extra piece of sunshine - you tried your best.

- you know you aren’t the best at that. but if this is all you can do, then what else should you do?

- sometimes you wonder if this ship really does need to be human automated. 

- what costs do they cut by hiring human workers instead? innovation? investment in machinery? why keep people on barely minimum wages in a random ship being sent out to space, with minimum facilities and minimum safety and security? isn’t it a safer bet to go all out with machinery, then turn a profit later down the line - rather than close to losing this hunk of metal nearly every other day?

- then you look into the lounge in what is assumed to be “six in the morning” - you don’t trust the clocks. everything feels fake - and get hit by literal beams of sunshines in your way ( read : curly, anya, and daisuke laughing together )

- maybe you can keep those thoughts for another day. you ate.. pretty okay pancakes that morning.

- perhaps the only thing you wished you could change, in definite terms, was the way jimmy lingered around anya’s room. 

- so stop it you did. or at the very least, attempted to stop it, you did.

- that’s the main reason you ended up sleeping on the front of anya’s room. (with her permission, of course)

- the reason you proposed to her was, and you quote, 

“i keep on having dreams of cockroaches.” 

- anya looked at you half asleep. the other half concerned, worried, and confused. you shuffled in front of her room, your hand hauling a mattress and your blankets awkwardly.

- .. she finally allowed you after a small while. maybe its because you looked pathetic. maybe its something else. you do not know, and you don't want to know.

- you eventually placed your mattress back into your room (due to the lack of space, you should’ve expected that - your only reason was that you did this on a whim), and slept on the floor, facing the walls with your blanket covering you like a silkworm.

- it’s not comfortable. thank god the tulpar has - at best - subpar air conditioning, otherwise you’d freeze to death in this huge metal hunk in space.

- it successfully warded off jimmy though. or so you’ve observed. so you really don’t mind the way your back aches every morning. 

- maybe you should bring more pillows…

the door behind you croaks slowly, and slowly- your eyes peek open, looking up at a dimmed figure. an anya-looking dimmed figure. you immediately relax back in your blanket.

“..nightmares again?” she looks concerned about your sleeping position. for a moment, you feel bad for lying.

you purse your lips, and nod at her.

“.. yeah.”

she watches from the door, and nods at you. 

you think she finally figured out that you knew about jimmy’s recent lingering. she spares you a thankful glance, and sends you a soft nod.

“..goodnight. thank you.”

you nod back, and once the door shuts back, you slump further. as much as these metal walls allow you, anyway.

you hope you dream this night. maybe of home, or of something sweet. maybe of something better.

you aren't sure what that something is. but you hope you find it soon.

but, oh, who were you kidding.

you never got the chance to dream. this night isn't any different.

you slip into a void; your body awaiting tomorrow.

i hope u enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it .. !

initially started off as a daisuke x reader insert but i went too far and suddenly i have this.. this...... series.... will get more into the romance after i world build a bit more.. if you have any specific requests for the reader in this au, don't be afraid to shoot something in my ask box!

extra notes: in order of youngest to oldest, i hc daisuke to be youngest, then reader, then anya, curly/jimmy and swansea !

sun & moon dividers by : @/saradika daytime screen & medical bay from mouthwashing

[devotedlyandrogynousyouth]

AkrhamKnight! Jason Todd

-----------------------------

Sensitive Topics: descriptions of a toxic relationship and mentions of physical abuse (none actually written)

AK! Jason Todd who you're not even sure what you have with. Every time you try to refer to him as your boyfriend or yourselves as together like you did before his death, he pulls away and gets defensive.

"There isn't an 'us,' sweetheart. I ain't letting shit from before that fucking clown got to me matter now."

But if you try to walk away from the situation or start talking to somebody else, he gets so incredibly jealous.

"Oh so you really need two guys' attention now? What a fucking whore..."

AK! Jason Todd who, if you couldn't tell by now, is so incredibly toxic in whatever situation you have. He cant stand to see you walk away but it kills you inside every time you come back to him and his baggage.

"Come one, sweetheart... It was just a mistake. We all make 'em, right? Don't you go leaving me over some petty shit like that."

AK! Jason Todd who absolutely loathes you going out at night. Even when he's there with you, it still puts him on edge to see you walking the cold, dark Gotham sidewalks when you could be safe in his apartment or the base instead.

AK! Jason Todd who just gets so mean with you for no reason. Well, not for little things like forgetting to pick up plastic wrap at the store or something. More like walking alone in Gotham without him knowing you were even gone. He hates the thought of something happening to his precious little thing.

AK! Jason Todd who would never physically harm you. Are insults thrown around like confetti? Absolutely! Is there a scream fight almost every week? You bet! But has he ever raised a finger against you? No. And he would never even think of it.

AK! Jason Todd who's absolutely pissed whenever somebody even looks at you for too long, nevermind making comments. You'd be surprised just how many of his soldiers he's gotten rid of just for telling him to "put his bitch in her place," or for telling you to "cover up, slut."

AK! Jason Todd who can't open up. He knows what he's doing is horrible. He knows that everything he does affects you in one way or another. But what about the horrible things other people have done? What about what the Joker did to him? What about Bruce letting the Joker roam free afterwards and replacing him with another goody two shoes? Jason wants to talk to you, he really does. But he just doesn't see how you or anybody, for that matter, coyld ever understand him or what he's been through.

AK! Jason Todd who found himself crying in the dark shadows of your shared apartment when Bruce first came along to stop his ridiculous plan to take over Gotham with Scarecrow's fear toxin. Jason loved Bruce. Bruce was his only family. But family means that nobody gets left behind and Bruce sure as hell broke that rule.

(This is actually kinda cannon: in Akrham Knight, one of the conversations you can overhear between a few of the gaurds mentions Jason crying after encountering Bruce for one of the first times)

AK! Jason Todd who truly does love you, in some way. He doesn't think he can be in love with you, but that doesnt makw him care about you any less. You're his person, and you've been there for him whether he likes it or not.

AK! Jason Todd who would absolutely lose it if anything were to ever happen to you. He never wants to see even a hair on your damn head hurt if he can help it. If one of his guards were to be responsible for an injury you sustained, they'd be out the door and probably six feet under in a heartbeat.

AK! Jason Todd who, no matter what your situation or relationship is like, refuses to let you see his chest. Yeah, his entire body is covered in scars, both from the Joker and other things he's experienced. But the 'Y' shaped scar on his chest is strictly off limits. If you were to ever accidentally brush your hand across it while laying with him or something, he wouldn't lash out, but he'd certainly guide your hand away by gently grasping your wrist.

AK! Jason Todd who never wants to see you involved with anything he does or his plans. He thinks that his activities are far too dangerous for you, even if you do happen to be somebody who's capeable of holding your own in combat or other high-stress situations.

-----------------------------

Masterlist

[writeonwhiskey]

how about a seungmin drabble? something dirty and sweet? plz 💕

This is an ask that I'm including with a comment that requested a Seungmin one-shot. The more specific request was for a "best friend's brother" type story. I hope you and @miniversed enjoy it!

a/n: a semi-sweet drabble. i'm working on keeping things short because I really started writing the entire backstory for these two lol but i've narrowed it down to this one scene! this has not been edited, take it easy on me.

warnings: unprotected sex, oral (f receiving) - 18+ ONLY

word count: 2,362

You’re seated on the vanity counter with Seungmin between your legs. You don’t know how you got here, but a voice in the back of your head is screaming that you shouldn’t have accepted the invitation to come see him perform—especially without your best friend.

You part your lips as his tongue invades your mouth, satiating the desire that’s been growing in you for fourteen years. You’ve fantasized about this moment countless times and now that it’s finally happening, you want nothing more than to give in to the moment.

But you know this isn’t right. You shouldn’t be doing this.

You shouldn’t have come to this room with him.

You tangle your hands in his short, dark hair, leaning back as he starts kissing down your neck.

This is your best friend’s brother for crying out loud. What would she think? What would she say?

“Wait, wait, Seungmin,” you tug on the strands of his hair to pull him away from you. You should probably shut your eyes while you say this. You can’t look at his face—his perfect fucking face. You’ve been drooling over his face even more than usual since he cut his bangs and added that slit in his eyebrow. You turn your head away from him, shaking it, “We can’t.”

“Why not?” He softly pushes your hands away from his hair and resumes kissing your neck.

“No—wait, wait,” you say again. “What about your sister?”

“What about her?” He pulls back from you, his face scrunched up. “I don’t want to think about her right now.”

“Well, I can’t not think about her—she’s my best friend. I don’t know if she would forgive me for this.”

“She doesn’t have to know,” he shrugs.

“Seungmin,” you plead softly. “You have no idea how badly I want this. How long I’ve wanted this.”

“How long?” he asks, resting his hands on your thighs and spreading your legs apart. He doesn’t wait for your response before asking a follow up question. “Do you know how long I’ve wanted it?”

Your eyes open wide. You watch as his finger inches higherup your thighs, slipping beneath your skirt. You shake your head again.

“You remember that summer vacation you took with us to Jeju?” he asks softly.

Of course, you remember that trip. You were sixteen. He was seventeen. You were nervous to go out on the beach in your bathing suit—your first time wearing one since your body had fully developed. You were afraid what people might think or say, but Seungmin smiled when he saw you and all your worries were flushed down the drain.

“I’d never seen you like that before,” he says. “You want to know what I did that night?”

Your eyes are locked on his arms on your thighs, his hands have now fully disappeared beneath your skirt. You feel his fingers rubbing along the edges of your underwear.

“I stroked my cock while thinking of you, y/n,” he admits.

“Seungmin,” you whisper. You place your hands on his chest to keep his mouth from coming back to yours.

He uses one finger to pull your underwear towards him.

“Do you want me to stop?”

You look around the empty dressing room, eyes keying in on the door to make sure it’s locked. You don’t want any of the other members or staff to come in and see you like this. This secret can’t get out. It could ruin everything.

“No, I don’t,” you tell him. “But that doesn’t mean we should keep going.”

He slips his other hand between the opening he created in your underwear, sliding a finger up and down your slit causing you to gasp, then moan. Your hands slide up to the back of his neck, clasping together.

He takes the opportunity to lean forward again and reclaim your mouth. You part your lips, allowing his tongue to enter. He tastes of adrenaline and betrayal. He keeps leaning forward, forcing you back against the mirror as he kisses you, his finger still sliding along your slit.

“We could stop,” he says, breaking the kiss momentarily. “If we keep going, though, I promise you I’ll never say a word.”

You weigh your options as his finger keeps teasing your pussy. You pull him to you to kiss him again—a bad decision. You’re ready to throw caution to the wind so long as he’s touching you like this.

This is the boy you’ve had a crush on since he walked you home in second grade and it hasn’t faded. As much as you willed it to. This is the boy who came to your rescue in the middle of the night when you started your period and his sister was asleep—he found pads for you and provided a change of clothes since you’d ruined your own.

This is the boy you cooked countless meals for when you would stay the night, and he returned from practice at 12:00am. When everyone else was asleep and he wanted a hot, fresh meal, you were there to serve him. This is the boy whose compliments on your cooking encouraged you to pursue culinary school. This is the boy who brought his entire group to the restaurant you work at and ensured them it would be the best meal of their life.

This is the boy you can’t get enough of. You have to have him. Even if it’s just once. Even if it has to be a secret. Even if it can never happen again.

You slide your hands down and push back on his chest once more. You hold your fist out in front of him, pinky raised. This is so wrong.

“Promise?” you ask.

He hooks his pinky through yours with a crooked grin, “Promise.”

He lowers your intertwined pinkies until your hand is at the waistband of his pants and as you fumble with the button, his lips crash against yours.

So many thoughts are racing through your head—is this really okay? Will his sister ever find out? Will you be able to live with this secret?

But then, he’s pulling your underwear down and, quite frankly, you couldn’t give two shits. That’s for the you of tomorrow to worry about. Tonight you get to have him. Fucking finally.

You successfully unbutton and unzip his pants, and he steps back to pull your underwear completely off. You relax against the cold mirror, watching as he removes the sweatshirt he’s wearing and when his bare torso comes into view, you know you’ve made the right decision for yourself.

You have to experience this. Even if it’s just once. You have to get him out of your system and lay this crush to rest.

He pushes his pants and boxers down as he steps back towards you, freeing his cock. You subconsciously lick your lips at the sight, and he chuckles in response. You wiggle around on the desk, lifting your skirt up higher and scooting to the edge.

He grabs you by the waist with one hand, and spits in the other before sliding it against your pussy. He grips the base of his cock and lines himself up at your opening.

You lock your hands together behind his neck, biting your lip and holding your breath for what’s to come. His lips are back on yours as he slowly eases his cock inside. You moan into his mouth as he buries himself in you, partially in shock that this is really happening and not another dream.

He places his other hand on your waist and moves you closer to the edge of the vanity counter as he starts slowly thrusting in and out of you.

You squeeze your eyes shut, reveling in the feeling. You rock your hips back against his. He groans and breaks the kiss, pulling back to watch his cock at work.

“You’re so wet for me, y/n,” he says.

You moan and nod.

“How long?” he asks.

You’re so focused on fucking him back it takes you a moment to realize he’s even asked you a question.

“Too long,” you breathe.

“And is it as good as you imagined?” A coy smile is on his lips.

“Better,” you reply without hesitation.

He suddenly withdraws from you, but before you can panic that you’ve said the wrong thing, he drops to his knees. He hooks his arms under thighs, hands reaching over them to spread your pussy apart. He presses a long, hard lick up your slit and you just about collapse.

Your brain cannot comprehend. Seungmin is on his knees. Licking your pussy.

“Mmmm,” he moans between licks, “we taste good together.”

You fall back against the mirror with a heavy, satisfied sigh.

Why would he say that? How can you live knowing his lips have uttered such a phrase. How can you look him in the eyes the next time you’re with him and his family, and your best friend, knowing he’s said that?

Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

And then, his fingers are inside you while he sucks your clit into his mouth. And it doesn’t fucking matter. You’ll figure it out.

“Seungmin,” you pant.

He doesn’t stop his actions, but he looks up at you with those deep, brown eyes and your heart all but explodes at the sight. His face, buried between your thighs, eyes locked on you and only you as he fucks you with his fingers; his mouth working wonders on your clit.

“Can you—please,” you try to get a sentence out but your head falls back against the mirror with a thud, eyes rolling into the back of your head. Your hips thrust against his fingers and mouth of their own accord and your arch your back.

“Fuck, yes,” he pauses sucking your clit to say, “Give it to me, y/n.”

And how could you not?

You grit your teeth to keep from alerting the entire backstage crew of your activities. You place your feet on the counter, gripping your hands in his hair and pushing your hips against his face as you come.

His fingers and mouth don’t stop until you’ve finished trembling. You collapse against the counter with a sigh as he stands, his mouth smiling and glistening with your juices. Holy fuck, you can’t believe your eyes.

Even in your weakened state, you still want to taste him. You use all your remaining energy to sit up and reach for his cock.

“Next time,” he says pushing your hand aside as he pulls you down from the counter.

You stare back at him, blinking. Dumbfounded.

You never intended for this to happen in the first place. Now he’s insinuating there will be a next time? You don’t know if you can handle it. But you do know that it shouldn’t happen.

He kisses you, allowing you to taste yourself on his lips. And he’s right—you do taste good together. It’s a shame.  

He turns you around, forcing you down with a hand on your back until your torso is pressed against the counter. He pushes your skirt up higher, exposing your ass. He palms one cheek as he lines himself up at your entrance again. You glance at him over your shoulder, watching as he eases himself into you and let out a sigh when he’s all the way in.

It truly feels better than you could have ever imagined. Is it because this feels taboo? Is it because having his cock inside you feels like everything you could ever want or need?

You wiggle your ass back against him and turn your head to face the mirror. You watch his reflection as he slowly withdraws, then slams himself back into you. You both moan as he repeats the process, gripping your hips to pull you to him with even more force.

You lay your palms flat against the counter, bending your knees slightly to bounce back against him.

“Y/n,” he groans, his eyes glued to where your bodies are connected, “I never thought—oh, fuck!”

You fuck him back as he loses his train of thought and smacks your ass. He bares his teeth, breathing heavily as he rams into you.

This is so wrong, and you both know it. There may be consequences to pay, but it will be worth it.

“I’m gonna come,” he warns you.

You lock eyes with him through the mirror and give a subtle nod. His fingers dig into your waist, and he pulls you back against him with all the strength in him as he comes.

His thrusts slow down as he spills into you. You rest your head against the counter to hide your smile, satisfied with each groan that falls from his lips.

When he’s done, he fully withdraws his cock and takes a step back to admire his handiwork.

“Don’t move,” he says, pulling his pants back up. He then digs inside his back pocket and retrieves his phone.

“Seungmin,” you protest and start to stand.

He lowers you back against the counter and presses his jeaned thighs against your bare ass. He angles his phone above you and snaps a picture.

“I need something to get me through this tour,” he tells you.

You’re not sure what to make of that, but it feels like a compliment.

He puts his phone back into his pocket and palms your ass again, making you moan. He steps away and picks up your underwear from the ground, tucking them into his front pocket. He reaches over you for the tissue on the counter and finally wipes you clean.

“You should come out with us tonight to celebrate the start of the tour,” he says, tossing the tissue into the trash.

“I should probably go home and shower,” you say, standing up and turning to face him.

“Not yet,” he wraps an arm around your waist to pull you to him. “I want you to walk around with us on you for a while.”

You look up at him and take a deep breath. What have you gotten yourself in to?

a/n: how was that? did my best to keep it short and to the point! hehe this was fun! once again, asks are open for one-shots!

[retrorats]

Some thoughts about Komaeda's fifth free time event and his relationship with Hinata

The fifth Komaeda free time event has always been very popular between Komahina fans, specially because the event was where the romantic tone of their relationship was consolidated for a lot of people. But even if the focus is usually on Komaeda's love confession, I have always felt that this free time event is way more important and meaningful besides that. This event has on it a lot of important moments that say a lot about their relationship, and that make very clear the most prevalent themes of it.

The free time event starts with Komaeda wondering why Hinata is still going out in his way to talk to him. Hinata answers that he is doing it so he can hear the rest of his story, in his typical fashion of rationalizing and dismissing his feelings for Komaeda. While Komaeda tells the rest of the story, he says one of the most important things for this free time event, and in general for the relationship of Komaeda and Hinata.

This dialogue reveals to us the important information about how Komaeda not only perceived the similarities between them since they first met, but also how since that moment, he deeply believed that Hinata would be able to understand him. All of the things that this scene explains are the fundamental basis of the relationship of Komaeda and Hinata. Komaeda's attachment towards Hinata comes from a place of feeling like he had finally found a person that could get to understand him and as we will see with other parts of this free time event, he thought he had finally found a person that could love him.

Hinata's response towards Komaeda is also important to mention. Hinata negates to be not like Komaeda, he rejects their similarities and also in certain way he rejects the connection Komaeda feels between them, something that's accentuated even more considering how Komaeda interprets his words as having lost the opportunity of having someone inheriting his soul. But even in his negation, there's something deeply interesting in the way Hinata phrases certain things in it. If we look well at what Hinata is saying, we can see how while he negates being similar to Komaeda, his negation is mostly focused on negating his misery, and he seems to silently accept being a bystander that is devoid of any unique aura possessed by the talented.

In a certain way, Hinata's negation in this part has always read to me as being a last resort to try to distinguish himself in some way from Komaeda. Compared to other parts where Komaeda alludes to him and Hinata being similar, here the negation of Hinata doesn't feel so unaware like in the other times that he negated it, here it feels more like Hinata is legitimately aware of how similar they are; He says that he's not miserable, and that he is ultimately different from Komaeda as a last resort to negate what he already knows, and to dissociate himself from him.

Komaeda talks about how he doesn't have anyone in this world and how absolutely lonely his existence is. Something very interesting that Komaeda says, is that he mentions his ideologies as the main reason for being alone.

This moment is not only interesting because it puts Komaeda loneliness to be something that is a lot about his way of thinking being completely incomprehensible for other people, but also because it provides us with certain information about the relationship between Komaeda and Hinata. People distancing from Komaeda because of his beliefs is not something that is only mentioned here, but it is very explicitly the main reason why Hinata distanced himself from Komaeda since chapter 1. Because of this, it's not hard to read this to be a certain reference to his relationship with Hinata -a person that Komaeda really felt he could connect with- and how he also ended up distancing himself because of his way of thinking, like other people Komaeda knew.

This seems to be the principal reason of why Komaeda seems to be so focused on believing that he and Hinata are similar, and also in the belief of Hinata being able to understand him. Komaeda has been misunderstood by everyone all his life and his ideologies have isolated him from the rest of society. All of this has resulted on Komaeda having the fixation on finding someone that would be able to understand him, this fixation ultimately leading him to have a very intense attachment towards Hinata even when they barely really knew each other, because it was probably the first time he had known someone that was similar enough to him to understand him.

There is also a certain connection between Komaeda thinking that they are similar, Hinata distancing himself from him and Komaeda's surprised reaction in chapter 1 seeing Hinata had started to think lowly of him. When Komaeda thought that he and Hinata were similar, he probably also believed that Hinata had a similar way of thinking, and because of that, he wouldn't just distance himself from Komaeda like the others when discovering the truth of the murder.

Considering how Komaeda talks about feeling that Hinata was able to understand his feelings, how he implied that he wanted Hinata to "inherit his soul" and in general considering how much this free time event talks about their connection, is not hard to think that in certain way this line is also a little bit about Hinata. Obviously, Komaeda's desire to be loved wasn't born because of Hinata, but I do think considering all we have seen before, is logical to think that one of the reasons Komaeda was so attached to Hinata is because he saw in him -because of their similarities- someone that he could connect with, and for that same reason, someone that could love him.

This is specifically accentuated considering the very strong reaction that has Hinata regarding this statement, literally considering throwing everything he has believed about not forgiving Komaeda until that point. I don't think that his reaction is because he was aware of that fact, but I do think it was written in that way to accentuate how this was talking in a certain way about Hinata.

Hinata's extremely heartbreaking and intense response towards Komaeda "lying" could also be easily considered a hint towards this being in a certain way about Hinata, but his response to this is also about way more than just that. His reaction is due to a lot of things, for one part it's about how Hinata feels like he was just deceived by Komaeda again, after having spent so much time trying to actually understand him. But is also about how Hinata wanted to believe in the existence of the Komaeda he once knew. Both of these very strong reactions -this one and his reaction towards Komaeda wanting to be loved- are born from that, from the need to believe him and to have a proof that after all, there existed some truth about the Komaeda he once knew, that there was some logic behind Komaeda, that there existed a reason behind his behavior.

He specially wanted to believe on that line because of how human it makes Komaeda. His biggest desire being something as sensible and human as connection, and this desire, being only realized when on the verge of death, is something that makes Komaeda look very tragic. That makes, Komaeda, human and sensible, and his actions, suddenly are more understandable. Hinata wants to believe on this because he wants to make reason of Komaeda, and give a logic, a very human and sensible logic, to the way he acts.

To finalize, I really love this event because I feel that in it is conveyed all of the main themes and important parts of the relationship of Komaeda and Hinata. It's very beautiful for me to see all the little parts that make them themselves being presented so strongly and explicitly on a full event.

[woodywood101blog]

Experimental: Delivery, Part 1

The following days were a whirlwind for Yazan and Randy, as they discovered this new phase of their relationship. They both know it will be a bit surprising to everyone back at the hospital when they return with both four babies and a newfound love for each other. At the same time, you can’t always stop what the heart (or dick) wants!

Yazan and Randy tried to enjoy as much as they could in these final weeks, including a trip to the beach. Yazan gave up on finding shirts that would fit, so he arrived at the beach wearing a large bra and board shorts. Randy said it might have been easier for him to shave his beard, to at least appear more feminine while in a public space, but Yazan didn’t have the energy to worry about shaving, especially as he had always maintained a beard for as long as he started growing facial hair. Randy didn’t bother arguing, so they went down south towards Royal National Park and wandered along a more secluded beach, knowing there wouldn’t be as many people around.

Yazan and Randy talked about all sorts of things, including names for the babies, Yazan’s massive breasts, preparing bottles of colostrum and eventually milk, buying the things needed for a nursery, and eventually birth.

“So, we definitely know your ass is malleable, but we still don’t know if it could sustain birthing all four babies.” Randy said.

“I know, I just… I’m scared.” Yazan sighed and looked away.

“Hey, Yaz, look at me.” Randy replied as he grabbed Yazan’s shoulder and moved towards him. “You’re going to be okay. I’m here, we’ve got support from the researchers here, we’re all going to make sure you and the babies are safe. Alright?”

“Alright. I just -”

“Nope, you’re going to be okay!”

“Ugh, here you were bursting into tears weeks ago and now here I am like a blubbering mess.”

“You at least have hormones to explain away your blubber. I don’t!” Randy replied, and they both laughed.

***

At around 36 weeks, they both agreed that Yazan stays at the apartment and only leaves to go across to the lab as needed for the now daily scans. Yazan wasn’t too sure why it needed to move to daily ultrasounds, but it was Mike’s strong recommendation to do so. As far as Randy and Yazan were concerned, and going off the ultrasounds, the babies were all developing nice, healthy and strong. It gave Yazan time to slow down and appreciate the little moments, like the larger ripples of movement from the babies, as well as being able to work out who is positioned where within the belly. He also noticed his belly had dropped, meaning he could breathe fairly normally for the first time in months. It’s only a matter of time now, he thought.

(morph by @bigmpregnm)

It also meant he didn’t need to stress too much about clothing, so he had no hesitations in bringing out some of the shirts and clothes he gave up on long ago to just drape over the top of him. Randy saw Yazan one afternoon standing on the balcony of the apartment, looking out towards the city. Randy walked up from behind and moved his hands as far as he could to the front of the belly, swaying and kissing Yazan on the neck.

Yazan purred as he felt everything coming together nicely. “Isn’t this lovely?”

“What is?” Randy asked.

“Just… everything. The babies are almost here, I’ve got you to help me with the kids, we’re in this beautiful apartment here in Sydney for now, and then we can start a new life together back home.”

“A new life together?”

Yazan turned around and said, “Yeah, I was thinking today -”

“That’s never a good sign!”

“Shush you! I was thinking that I’d probably need an extra set of hands to help look after these four, and since you’ve already helped so much, I’d love it if you could move in with me? I’ve got a spare room if you -”

Randy leaned in and kissed Yazan on the lips. “I’d love that, Yaz. Yes, of course I’ll move in with you!” 

Yazan grinned widely at Randy’s response. “I love you, Randy.”

Now it was Randy’s turn to grin widely. “I love you too, Yazan.” Randy turned towards the edge of the balcony and screamed out “I love you, Yazan!!” Yazan laughed and tried to cover Randy’s mouth as Randy mumbled “But I want the world to know, Yaz…” They laughed as they walked back inside the apartment and prepared for dinner.

***

Randy could sense that Yazan was getting more tired as the days went on, to the point where he recommended Yazan just stayed in bed to avoid putting his body under extreme pressure. Yazan, being the stubborn person he is, didn’t take too lightly to being told to do nothing, so had no hesitation in wandering around the apartment, lightly bobbing his belly. Of course, after a couple of minutes, he would feel puffed out and have no choice but to sit down.

“See, I told you! Go, you’re on bed rest now.”

“What?! You can’t order me to rest.”

“I can! Remember who signed your medical clearance?”

“Fine…” Yazan groaned loudly as he tried to stand up and slowly walk back towards bed. He took off his shirt and pants, and grabbed extra pillows to have behind his back as he sat up in bed on “bed rest”.

“Okay, babe, I’m going to go to the lab and grab an ultrasound and tubes so we can do the tests from home. You stay in bed, alright?”

“Yep, okay then. See you soon!”

Randy quickly shut the door and dialled Anna. “Hey, Anna! How’s it going?”

“Yeah, not too bad. Coincidentally, I’m just having a look at Yazan’s most recent blood results. They seem okay…”

“You don’t sound confident?”

“Are you on your way to the lab?"

“Yeah, I’ve put Yazan on bed rest, so I was thinking of borrowing a mobile ultrasound and doing the scan from the apartment.”

“Okay, we’ll talk more when you’re here.”

“Rightio, chat soon!”

Randy speed-walked towards the bus stop to get to the lab. Once there, he saw Anna out the front with Mike talking.

“Hey there, guys! Is everything alright?” He saw Anna and Mike look towards Randy with a serious look on their faces. “Guys? What’s wrong?”

“Let’s talk inside.” Mike said with a hint of worry.

As they got into Mike’s office, Mike immediately said, “Right, so the most recent blood results seem to show a spiked level of testosterone in Yazan’s system. We’re not too sure where it’s coming from, but we’re worried this is the beginning of Yazan’s body rejecting the pregnancy.”

Randy gulped as he processed the news. “Okay, so what do we do? Do we book him in for an emergency c-section? He’s on bed rest now as he’s too tired to move around the apartment.”

“Too tired? Anna, I think we need to see Yazan.”

“No, Yazan doesn’t want -”

Anna interjected, “I know Yazan doesn’t want Mike there,” and briefly mouthed sorry to Mike, “but we’re worried that if the body rejects the pregnancy without us being able to get labour underway, there’s a real chance the babies will die as the body pumps T-cells all over.” Randy looked down in worry. “We’re here to help you, Yazan and the babies, okay? So can we come over and have a look?”

“Okay… but I bet you Yazan will not be impressed!”

“I guess I’ll have to practise my best bedside manner then, right?”

***

After two hours in bed, Yazan already hated doing nothing. He never was the kind of person to sit around and wait, so he did what he thought would be vaguely useful: he decided to go and clean the apartment. He saw Randy picking up so much of the slack around the apartment because of his immobility, so he thought he’d do something nice and clean the place room by room. So, with a bit of effort, he slowly moved himself out of bed, slipped on a bra and some shorts and got to work.

He grabbed a broom from a cupboard and started sweeping around the main living room. He thought it was a fairly simple task to do, especially as he could lean on the broom and rest as needed. I’ll just start with the sweeping and go from there, Yazan thought.

After about 15 minutes of sweeping across the entire apartment, he started to feel a different kind of pressure building up in his back. He groaned as he rubbed his lower back to try and dissipate the pressure, but noticed it wasn’t disappearing.

“Hmm” he groaned. “Maybe I’ll go and sit down.” As he went to go and sit, he suddenly felt a searing pain spread across his back and abs. He gasped in shock at how intense the jabbing pain felt. “That’s insane! No, this can’t be it… No, no, no, no, no!”

He can’t be in labour now. He eventually sat down on the sofa and calmed down the babies as they kicked up a fuss. “Shh, it’s okay kids. Daddy’s here. Seems like you’ll be here sooner than expected, huh?”

About 20 seconds later, he felt what he could only describe as a water balloon bursting inside him, followed by a small trickle of liquid coming out of his ass. “Fuck!!! This can’t be happening now!!”

His waters have broken. These kids want out now!

He groaned as he tried to stand back up, but struggled with the pain across his hips and lower back. He could feel the babies push further down towards his ass, confirming that his manpussy really was going to be where the kids were coming out.

After two more intense contractions, Randy walked into the apartment. Anna and Mike stayed outside to wait for Randy to invite them in. Randy looked down in shock as he saw Yazan kneeling on the floor, rubbing his belly aggressively and sweating all over his body. He also saw a small puddle of liquid near his ass. Yazan looked up and smiled briefly at Randy before groaning in pain.

“Yaz, what the fuck are you doing? You’re meant to be in bed!”

“Argh, you know I can’t sit still! I just wanted to - ARGH!” Yazan screamed as he felt an intense contraction rip through his body.

“Babe, how long have you had these contractions?”

“I don’t know, but they’re getting stronger!” Yazan groaned.

“Anna! Mike! In here - now!”

“Wait, what…” Yazan turned and groaned as he saw Anna and Mike walk into the apartment and look down at the scene. Mike’s jaw dropped as he saw Yazan’s extremely bloated belly.

“I really should’ve brought him in for a planned c-section last week. Shit!” Mike said quietly to Anna.

“Well, he’s in labour now, so we need to help, Mike!” Anna replied sternly. Randy looked at Anna, slightly pleased that she’s standing her ground. Anna kneeled down to Yazan, “Hey Yazan, I’m Anna, one of the research assistants. We’re going to take you to RPA now. We’ll call one of our other assistants to prepare a private room. For now, just breathe, and once this contraction is done we’ll get you to stand up. Okay?”

Yazan nodded as he struggled to breathe through a new contraction. Randy looked incredibly concerned as he saw Yazan holding his breath.

“Yaz, you need to breathe through the contractions. Like this..” Randy tried to help Yazan slowly breathe as the contraction slowly died down.

“Ahh, that was a rough one, Randy!” Yazan lightly chuckled. Randy didn’t find it humorous as it looked like Yazan was about to pass out from the pain.

“Alright, we’re going to help you stand up now, Yazan, okay?” Anna put on her best doctor’s voice. Randy looked up and smiled at Anna as she took the lead. “Mike, can you help Randy lift Yazan?”

Mike quickly scrambled across to Yazan, as he and Randy helped bring Yazan to his feet. Yazan groaned loudly as he felt the babies dig further into his hips.

“This hurts so fucking badly, Mike. Fuck you!”

Randy mumbled to Mike as Yazan moaned, “What’s that phrase, you’re in the shitter?” Mike glared back at Randy, while Randy smirked back at him.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Sweet Treat

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, power imbalance, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You bake one of your favourite fall treats for your coworkers but one of them takes it to mean more than it does.

Characters: Tony Stark

Note: this is the fourth of my autumn fics as decided by all of you!

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Asking for more or putting ‘part 2?’ is not feedback.

Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖

The leaves feel more vibrant as you walk along the autumnal street. Clusters sit at the base of street poles and the brisk wind nips at your cheek and nose. You tuck your chin into your woolly scarf and hug the container of treats closer. 

You stifle a yawn. Your exhaustion is well worth the output. You spent most of the night baking. It’s a hobby for you and now that you have your first steady job, you have the funds and the space to do it. And as the newbie in the office, it felt right to add a bit of warmth to the office culture. 

To be honest, you’re trying to fit in. Since you started your desk job, you’ve felt that pressure. It’s all new to you and you feel like every day is a learning experience. Everyone else seems so settled and sure. It’s not like a retail gig where you’re all just trying to get through another day. 

As you get to the front door of the building, your met with a familiar face. Rhodey flicks two fingers in a half-wave and drawls out ‘morning’ as he opens the door for you. You thank him and enter the lobby. 

He trails you along the polished tile and you both stop before the metallic doors of the elevator. He taps the button as you tap one heel impatiently. He takes a deep breath and lets it out. 

“What’s all that?” He asks. 

“Oh, it’s a surprise.” 

“A surprise?” He wonders. 

He’s always nice. He interviewed you and helped you on your first day. He’s too busy for you to run into each other very much, but he’s always pleasant. 

“Yes, you have to wait until you get upstairs to find out.” 

“Oh, maybe I should see if I can beat the elevator,” he kids and looks at the door to the stairs. You chuckle. The doors ahead of you slide apart. “Ah, nevermind, seems like fate is on my side.” 

He gestures you in ahead of him. The ascent is smooth enough. You’re never a fan of the rising sensation that makes you woozy. You step off thankfully, clutching the container firmly to your stomach. 

“Well, I should find my desk,” you say. 

“Hey wait, what about the surprise?” He asks. 

“Oh, yeah, fine,” you face him and slide your arm under the container. You peel the corner of the lid back with your other hand and smile, “apple pastries. Hope you like ‘em.” 

“Homemade?” He asks as he reaches for one. 

“Sure are,” you chime. “I have napkins in my bag but my hands are kinda full.” 

“Nah, I don’t mind a mess,” he sniffs the dessert, “think this will go well with my coffee.” 

“Let me know if you like it,” you smile. 

“Oh, you will know. I might just try to sneak a second,” he says and turns to head off towards the executive offices. 

You shut the container and wade through the desks to your own. You put the container down and strip off the layers of your scarf, gloves, hat, and coat. You finally get yourself set as Marissa shows up. 

“Do you smell cinnamon?” She asks as she wiggles her nose and plunks her insulated cup down. 

“Yes, I do,” you take the lid off and gesture to the container. “Want one?” 

“Hm, apple?” She asks and you nod. “What’s this all about?” 

“I don’t know. I made them so I thought I’d share.” 

“Huh, that’s sweet,” she remarks dryly as you offer her a napkin. “Enjoy that optimism while it lasts.” 

Your cheek twitches. You notice that about the people here. Even if something good happens, they’re suspicious about it. They want to know why or the expect something horrible to follow. 

As more people shuffle in, you offer them a pastry. Everyone seems to like them so far. Yet, you still have lots to go around. 

You get up and Marissa glances over, “any more?” 

“Well, yeah, I was going to go offer them to the managers.” 

“Oh,” she darts her eyes way. “Good luck.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Nothing, just... interrupting for a pastry... kinda... non-productive.” 

“Oh, right,” you pout, “maybe I could just leave them in the breakroom.” 

“Probably a better idea.” 

You’re disappointed. You know the execs rarely go that far. Still, she’s right and she would know better than you. 

You take the container and pass between the other desk. As you pass the hallway to the exec spaces, you nearly collide with someone else. He barely seems to notice until you squeak and save the desserts from spilling. 

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you eke out as the man struts by only to scuff to a halt.  

He turns back to you, a pinch between his brows and a tick in his cheek. You clamp your mouth shut as his dark eyes penetrate you. It’s him, Mr. Stark, the big boss. You’ve never seen him this close-up. You panic and look around as a hush falls across the office. 

“Would you like one?” You ask out of sheer helplessness. You offer up the container and his eyes slowly descend. His expression doesn’t change. 

To your surprise, he steps closer. He reaches into the container and takes one of the pastries. He examines it then turns away without a word. You stare after him in fear of your livelihood. 

You wait until he’s gone and scurry into the breakroom. You put the container on the counter and catch your breath. Oh gosh. You just blew it, didn’t you? Over something as stupid as desserts. You shouldn’t be handing out treats like Santa Claus, you should be working! 

You put your head down and march out. You go directly back to your desk and sit. You feel eyes on you. Marissa wheels closer. “Told you. Don’t bother the big guys.” 

🍏

The windows are dark as you finally log off. It’s no coincidence that you’re the only one left in the office. It might be futile but you hope the extra work might save you from the fallout of your unfortunate run-in earlier. 

You cross the office floor and dip into the breakroom. You claim the empty container from the counter. You’re happy that your hard work didn’t go to waste, at least. 

You return to your desk and snap the lid on. You gather up your coat and pull on your hat and scarf, leaving your gloves in your pocket. You pack up your bag and sling it on your arm, clutching the container against your hip.  

You push your chair in and turn. You nearly shriek, instead swallowing it to a squeal, as you find someone else standing across the space. You put your hand to your chest and gasp. 

“Sorry, sir, I didn’t hear you,” you gulp. It’s Mr. Stark. Great, you don’t think you’ve done enough to stop the inevitable. 

He comes closer, sliding his hands into his pockets as he approaches. He’s silent as he measures you with a long gaze. The silver at his temples twinkles against the darker strands. He stops at the corner of your desk. 

“You all out?” He nods to the container. 

You flinch, “um, yes, sir.” 

“Too bad. Tasty,” he says. “And that little heart in the pastry... nice touch.” 

“Oh,” you’re surprised by his praise, expecting a full remonstrance. “Thank you. I... I just thought it was cute but, er, sorry, I don’t mean to chatter. I should go.” 

“Yeah, me too,” he says, “another late night.” He clucks and glances around the empty office. “You know, that really... made my day. Not much to look forward around here.” 

Your brows rise and you smile, unsure how to respond. 

“Feel like I owe ya more than a thanks,” his forehead lines as he tilts his head, “and I gotta grab something to eat,” he checks his watch and sighs, “all my meetings went long so could I pay you back?” 

“Uh, sir,” you wonder. 

“You like shawarma?” He intonses. 

“Shawarma?” You repeat, surprised. 

“I know, I know, a guy like me is supposed to live off caviar and fine steaks. You ever just get the craving for something....” he pauses and pokes his tongue into his cheek. “Nasty?” 

You chuckle, “um, sure. I sometimes order fast food.” 

“So? Unless...” he hesitates, “you’re busy? Looks like you’re running behind too.” 

“No, sir, that’s very generous. Um, I... yeah, I could... I could go for shawarma,” you agree, relief flowing over you. You don’t think he’s going to fire you unless it’s a trick. 

“Great, let me just grab my jacket.” 

🍏

Dinner is delicious, though a bit awkward. Your guilt isn’t lessened as Mr. Stark insists on paying for it. You tell him you can handle it but you don’t argue that much. He’s still your boss. 

You pull on your jacket as you leave the restaurant. He holds the door for you. You’re already mentally preparing to tuck into bed. 

“That was nice. If I don’t have some business lunch or dinner, I usually eat alone,” he scoffs as he comes up beside you. 

“Oh? Well, I’m glad you enjoyed it.” 

“Just as much as that special treat you made me,” he says. 

“Uh, yeah, well, I like baking--” 

“You know, no one ever offers me stuff like that. They all just get quiet when they see me. Can’t even look at me,” he grumbles. “But you smiled at me.” 

“I’m sorry, sir, that’s... they’re just intimidated, I’m sure. Because you’re so smart,” you say. 

“What about you? You’re not?” He asks as you stop next to his sleek red car. 

“No, I am,” you admit. “I’m the newest person in the office, everyone intimidates me.” 

He looks at you long and hard, “really?” 

“Well, yeah, I’m still learning how to do everything.” 

“Who?” He asks. 

“Who?” 

“Who’s being mean?” He growls. 

“What? No, sir. It’s not—no one’s mean. I didn’t say that.” 

“Because if someone’s messing with you, I’ll happily have a special meeting with them,” his expression darkens. 

“No one,” you avow. “Sorry, I must’ve said it the wrong way.” 

“You did nothing wrong,” he counters. 

“Right, er...” you peer over your shoulder, “I should go catch a bus--” 

“A bus?” He echoes. 

“Sure, it’s almost nine o’clock,” you look at your fitbit. 

“My car’s right here, get in,” he says. 

It’s a command and you’ve pressed your luck far enough. You nod and thank him as he opens the door. You sit in the low seat and hug your bag atop the empty container. He shuts you in and strolls around to the other side. 

As he sits in front of the steering wheel, his cologne clogs your nose. It’s definitely expensive. You squirm in the seat. You’re tired and a bit impatient to be home. You still have to go to the office early tomorrow. 

“Well, thanks for the ride,” you stifle a yawn and rub your eyes instead. 

“Lease I can do,” he says. “Where do ya live, sweetheart?” 

Sweetheart? The epithet tweaks your ear but you try not react. You worked in retail, a lot of men love that word. You give him your address. 

“Really? All the way over there?” He asks. “Girl like you shouldn’t be done there,” he tuts. 

“It’s not that bad,” you assure him. 

You drag your hand up your cheek, trying to wake yourself up. You’re exhausted. You’re so used to the 9-5 that you’re ready to flop into bed. 

You zone out at the engine hums. The soft motion of the turns lulls you and it isn’t until you’re halfway in the other direction to your apartment that your instinct kicks in. You sit up and look around. 

“Where are you going?” You ask in a panic. 

“I live closer, sweetheart. You can crash at mine,” he says. 

“Your-- no, Mr. Stark, I can’t do that. If you don’t want to drive me, I can get an uber.” You pull on the zipper of your purse and he hits the brakes. You lurch forward as he reaches over and clasps onto your hand. 

“You don’t need to do that,” he says. 

“Mr. Stark?” You babble. “What’s going on?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Why won’t you take me home?” 

He’s quiet. His eyes fall to his hand and he lets you go. He grips the wheel again but doesn’t go. He sighs and tilts his head back. 

“You gave me that pastry. With the little heart.” 

“I gave them to everyone--” 

“No, but you gave one to me.” He insists. 

“Sir,” you sniff. “I’m sorry if I did something wrong. Please don’t fire me.” 

“Fire you--” He turns to look at you, “no, no, no.” 

He fixes his gaze straight ahead and presses on the gas again. He rolls forward and turns down another street. You unzip your purse and once more, he stomps on the brake. You lurch forward and the seat belt digs into your chest as your bag falls onto your feet. 

“Don’t touch that phone,” he snarls. 

“Sir,” you sit back, rubbing where the belt bit into you, “sorry.” 

“It’s just... I can’t see where I’m going with the glare,” he exhales shakily. 

“Okay,” you whimper. 

He drives on. You don’t move. Your heart is racing. You don’t understand what’s going on. 

He enters the nicer neighbourhoods. Where the houses have that modern boxy feel, tall glass windows for walls, and iron gates around trimmed hedges. Their residents spends as much time there as their vacation homes on the next continent. 

He hits a button and steers toward one of the gates as it slides open on a motor. He rolls through as you sink into yourself. This must be his house. You’re still spinning with the suddenness of it all. From the office to dinner to this. One moment stoic and silent, the next smiling and kind, and now... 

As you look at him, his eyes are so dark that the swallow the glow from the dash and the security lights mounted on the house. He shifts into park and kills the engine. You twiddle your fingers and watch him. He reaches over and presses the button on your seat belt. 

You wince and look away as he trails his touch up your arm and to your shoulder. He walks his fingers up over your collar and along you neck. He traces the curve of your jaw as you shiver. 

“You gave me something sweet, baby,” he grabs your chin and makes you look at him again. “I just wanna return the favour.”  

He leans across the space between your seats and pushes his lips to yours. You murmur and grab onto his wrist. You feel the tendons tense as he squeezes you tighter. His mouth parts from yours and he presses his forehead to yours. You’re locked in his hold, paralysed.  

He hums and licks his lips, “You taste just as good.” 

[dissapointu]

How Jinx Would Act if Their Partner Got Hurt

1. Initial Shock, Then Panic

When you get hurt, Jinx’s first reaction is pure shock. She freezes up for a second, her eyes wide as she takes in the sight of you in pain. If it’s something serious, her breath hitches, and she might even stagger back, her hands trembling as if unsure what to do. The chaotic energy that usually surrounds her is completely gone in those first few seconds, replaced with an intense panic. “No, no, no, this can’t be happening!” she’ll shout, her voice high with worry.

2. Immediate, Protective Instincts Kick In

After the initial shock, her protective instincts take over. Without thinking, she’s rushing to your side, hovering over you like a shield. She’ll try to stop any bleeding, grab whatever supplies are around, and do everything in her power to help you. “Just hold on! I’ve got you!” she’ll say, voice trembling but determined. She might not always know the best way to handle the injury, but she’s resourceful and won’t let you suffer alone.

3. Overwhelming Guilt

Once the initial panic dies down, Jinx will likely blame herself. If she wasn’t around to prevent your injury or if she feels responsible in any way, she’ll spiral. “I should’ve been more careful! This is my fault!” She’ll mutter to herself as she tries to help you, the guilt eating at her, even if it wasn’t her fault. She’ll be apologizing profusely, not knowing how to make it right. “I didn’t mean for this to happen! Please don’t leave me…” Her words will be a mixture of anxiety, desperation, and self-blame.

4. Constant Reassurance

Throughout the whole ordeal, Jinx will be desperately trying to reassure you, even if her actions are a little frantic. She’ll check on you over and over, making sure you’re not slipping in and out of consciousness or feeling worse. “Hey, hey! Stay with me, okay? You’re gonna be fine. Don’t leave me.” Her tone will waver, alternating between tough and vulnerable, depending on how scared she’s feeling. She might even try to distract you with jokes or random ramblings just to keep you awake, “So, uh, if we ever get out of here, I think we should start a rock band, you know? Just to make things more interesting, right?”

5. Frantic Attempts to Fix It

Jinx will want to do everything she can to help you heal, even if she doesn’t have the knowledge or skills to do it perfectly. She’ll go into overdrive, grabbing whatever she can find to patch you up. Whether it’s bandages, alcohol, or anything she can improvise, she’ll try to make sure you’re taken care of. “Okay, don’t freak out, I’ve got this… kind of,” she’ll mutter, clearly not knowing what she’s doing but too determined to let that stop her.

6. Unable to Stay Calm

Jinx is rarely calm, but when you’re hurt, she’s even less so. Her nerves are frayed, and she can’t stop moving, her body twitching with energy that she can’t quite direct. She might be pacing back and forth, muttering to herself, and checking your injury over and over. “Why does this always happen to the people I care about?” she’ll say, almost pleading with the universe. Her chaos becomes less playful and more desperate when it comes to your well-being.

7. Won’t Leave Your Side

Once she realizes you’re hurt, Jinx is glued to you. She won’t leave your side, even if you insist that she go do something else. “No way, I’m not leaving you alone like this. You think I’m gonna let you suffer by yourself? Not happening.” Whether you’re at home or in the middle of some chaotic situation, she’ll refuse to go anywhere without you. She might even get a little clingy, not wanting to risk anything else happening to you.

8. Subtle Display of Vulnerability

Despite her tough exterior, Jinx is deeply vulnerable when it comes to those she loves. After you get hurt, she may hide it behind humor or chaotic behavior, but she’s deeply shaken. Her usual confidence falters, and she’ll show a rare side of herself that she tries to keep hidden. “You… you can’t be hurt, okay? I won’t let that happen. I’ll fix this, I promise,” she might say, her voice low and unsteady as she holds you close.

9. Overcompensating with Affection

When she sees you starting to recover, or even if you just need a little comfort, Jinx will shower you with affection. She’ll hug you tightly, kiss your forehead, and refuse to let you go for a while. “You’re gonna be fine, I swear! I’m not letting anyone hurt you, not while I’m around!” She’ll be unusually affectionate, and might even pull you into her lap or cuddle you to make sure you feel safe. Her way of showing that she cares will be to dote on you, even if she’s still a little shaken from what happened.

10. Teasing, But with a Touch of Care

Once she feels like things are back under control and you’re safe, Jinx will return to her usual playful self—but it’ll be softer, gentler than normal. She’ll tease you, trying to lighten the mood, but you’ll notice that her jokes are just a little more caring than usual. “You know, for someone so tough, you sure make a big deal out of a little scrape. You’re lucky I’m here to take care of you!” She’ll still joke, but she’s showing that she’s relieved you’re okay and doesn’t want to let her guard down again.

11. Planning to Make Sure It Doesn’t Happen Again

Once the panic dies down and you’re healing, Jinx will immediately start plotting to ensure nothing like that happens again. “Next time, we get way more prepared. Like, armor prepared, or something.” Her protective instincts kick into overdrive, and she’ll try to figure out every possible scenario to keep you safe in the future. She might even come up with elaborate plans to protect you from harm, even if it’s over-the-top and unnecessary. It’s her way of showing that she’ll do anything to prevent you from being hurt again.

12. Reluctantly Letting You Rest

While Jinx wants to keep you close, she’s also going to keep a watchful eye on you. She might insist that you rest or take it easy, making sure you don’t push yourself too hard. If you’re feeling tired, she’ll stay beside you, making sure you’re comfortable. “I’m not going anywhere, okay? You just take it easy, and I’ll be right here with you. I’m not leaving.” Her concern will be tangible, and she’ll do everything in her power to make sure you’re okay.

In conclusion, when you get hurt, Jinx will go into full-on protective mode. She’ll be chaotic, frantic, and full of love and worry, showing how deeply she cares in her own wild, unpredictable way. Whether it’s making sure you’re patched up or keeping you close, she won’t rest until she knows you’re safe and well.

[margoshamangolord]

A BIG POST WHY TFA SENTINEL IS A GOOD CHARACTER WHILE STILL BEING A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT

lots of thoughts under cut

I hated him like any tfa viewer is expected to, and i still do, because he's wrong oftenly and very fucking immature about his own actions, but it's just that fandom treats him like a simple flat cardboard designed for nagging the main characters, while he's not. Even people usually fond of discussing character depth just go "ew" at him, but i want to prove that he's not worse than even ratchet or bumblebee in terms of writing. His actions have depths, reasons and explanations. I do not want to excuse him in points where he actually fucked up, but i do want to remind that he's a character with a history and insecurities like others in tfa

I want to start off with the fact that while the hate he has inside the fandom is not really interesting, it is easily expected. He acts like a piece of shit and has a lot of negative traits (for example you have his attitude towards organics, and while you could kinda write it into being a reaction to Elita's 'death', it wouldn't be really valid, since Optimus was there too, he saw the same things as him, but he has no disgust towards humans)

The first thing i want to show would be this screenshot from the allspark almanac. It actually broke me when i saw it and prompted to write this because it brilliantly explains his whole character drama.

He feels guilty. He actually knows and admits he made a mistake and he is weighed down by it. He is fully and painfully aware of his stupidity in the situation.

But is he going to admit it? Is he going to apologise? Of course he's not. He cannot carry the weight of his guilt, but he cannot apologise and let himself be weak. So he made a vow.

He presses Optimus down and puts that weight on him because it's easier for him to stand straight reassuring himself that he's not at fault at all here. He feels that if he says sorry, then he'll be guilty forever and will never let go if he acknowledges it. He is guilty and he knows it, but he's immature and he does not want to think about it at all. He distracts himself with the rules and regulations.

"I did it, i fucked up trying to be something greater than i should, breaking rules. I'm never gonna wash it off, I'm guilty, but i must be better. If I don't make any more attempts at throwing over the rules, if I hold down others from doing so, i will be better, right?"

Rules are safety and comfort for him. Breaking rules and trying to be special is something he associates with Elita's death, and his thought process basically is "no rule breaking=no tragic accidents to be responsible for". He's confident that if he does everything by protocol, how he's told, then there will be no situation he would have to be blamed in. Of course he takes it to an extent. You oftenly see him obsessing over rules and regulations more oftenly than others — and now that makes sense.

The second thing would be his profile and Optimus's words about him. This text doesn't really serve us much important information, just a simple outside opinion on how he acts, except the first phrase.

"Sentinel means well, he really does."

As bizzare as it sounds, even Optimus, who he has a very sour relationship with, understands this. Sentinel actually means well — but it's just his experience and perception that really distort what comes out in the end. His "well" is very different from others' "well", but he definitely does not actually mean intentional harm in most occasions.

An unconcious goal that he most likely has is "do not let the elita incident happen again". It actually explains why he's trying to press down Optimus's ambitions and yells at young autobots about the importance of listening to the code. He may see himself in others.

Last is miscellaneous details. He actually covered Optimus and Elita when they were retreating — wouldn't do this if he was as selfish as creators want us to believe. He says he made a mistake in the almanac (when he was kinda being interviewed, he told the truth). Wouldn't really do that too. Most times he's been a dick to Optimus and his crew were him simply not believing immediate information without proof like he believes is the right way, like he's supposed to, and from his perspective he was genuinely sure he's doing the right thing

Conclusion

I would still slap him if i met him. But it doesn't mean that he should be rushed and avoided during discussion of character flaws and I'm tired of him just getting flatted down by the fandom as "mean and stupid do not touch". I want him to be taken seriously, and tbh finding out that he actually feels bad about archa seven is all it takes to be suddenly enlightened about the inner workings of his brain, because it connects all the dots.

And i would give all my money to see him canonically get a better development and more focus in the show. I would love if he accepted his wrongs, and if he had a genuinely honest conversation with Optimus. I really would.

[god-blues]

An Analysis of Clive Rosfield and the Dominants of FFXVI

finally writing this post after having brain worms about these themes since [checks notes] the game came out last year, so here goes

every single dominant in the game represents a theme to clive rosfield in some shape or form, and serves to mark the progress of his growth across the narrative of the game. either as an obstacle to overcome, or as a guiding beacon imparting him with purpose to keep carrying on

i'm going to look at each dominant that clive faces in the chronological order in which he absorbs their eikons, so we're starting from benedikta even though jill and joshua were the first ones in clive's life, and go from there. i'll be leaving leviathan out of this since i think that one's the most disconnected from clive's journey and has the least to say about him as a person (makes sense since it's DLC and not necessary for the full story)

also, this is obviously just my own interpretations of the game's themes and the way it utilizes their characters in clive's journey etc etc. i'm not saying this is the only Correct way to look at it, i just wanted to get my thoughts out on paper as a nice little overview for myself and others interested in that kind of thing

it's about 2k words long so i had to add a read more. onwards!

Benedikta Harman

benedikta and clive share similar traumas. both were enslaved at a young age, and while their experience of it differed for both, the similarities are so stark that the game practically spells it out for you. basically: benedikta is where clive would have ended up had he ignored or rejected cid's guidance

imo it's no coincidence that cid and benedikta have the history of cid having saved her from slavery when she was a young girl, because it mirrors how he saves clive and jill as well. the difference is that unlike clive and jill, benedikta did not end up with the benefit of gaining a support system like the hideaway

instead, she was taken in, used for her powers as a dominant and manipulated by barnabas, and eventually abandoned by cid which left her in an even worse place. with no other way to survive, she could only hold onto barnabas to grant her status and power to protect herself

now whether cid was wrong or right for leaving her behind is not something i'm gonna go into since we don't know enough about the circumstances in which it happened. from the way cid speaks to benedikta in game, benedikta and barnabas were responsible for acts he didn't agree with ("because i'd had enough of you and your king's antics"), so we'll leave it at that

that aside, though, it left benedikta to fend for herself, with no one she could have truly relied on. clive and jill, on the other hand, found a new home with people who understood and shared in their struggles, and with cid there to guide them

it makes the boss fight clive has with benedikta rather tragic, looking back on it. this is one of the boss fights that don't necessarily symbolize growth for clive, at least not in a positive way: he loses control just as benedikta did. it's a fight between two hurt people hurting each other because it is all they know how to do

the only difference is that one of them has people he can rely on, and the other is alone, used as a tool and then discarded when she served her purpose. the same as would have happened to clive, had he never escaped slavery

Cidolfus Telamon

it makes sense that we go from benedikta to cid after that, because once clive comes to terms with his trauma and Accepts The Truth, he moves onto the path of recovery. being that he doesn't know how to navigate that, however, cid becomes a natural mentor to him

from the start, you get the sense that cid has already decided in his mind that he wants clive to be his successor and keep the hideaway safe. the man is living on borrowed time, his arm turning to stone and coughing up blood every time he exerts his aether in any significant way. note what blackthorne tells clive the first time they meet, as well: "don't let cid decide what's best for you". cid clearly has a habit of steering people in certain directions

clive, who is at a loss on what to do now that he has been stripped of his original purpose, which was to avenge joshua, of course clings onto the new purpose that cid guides him towards. this is not to say that cid does so in a manipulative way: clive wants and needs to feel useful, and cid offers a way for him to do that to both their benefit. by the time they head to oriflamme, they hold a mutual trust between them, and clive views cid with clear respect and admiration, enough to pledge himself to cid's cause

the interesting part in all this is the way how clive absorbing ramuh coincides with him absorbing cid's ideals and cid's very identity as well in order to carry on his legacy. in the process, a part of clive's own identity becomes subsumed by this role he takes on as "cid" and the hideaway's new leader, quoting cid at various moments after the timeskip ("any objections?"). it is no different than the roles he fit himself into throughout his life or failed to fit into ("...prince, Shield, son his mother could love")

i always wonder what cid would have thought of that. i muse about it more in this post, if you're interested

Hugo Kupka

hugo kupka embodies, very plainly, refusing to accept the truth and being blinded by vengeance.

both hugo and clive were wrapped up in this idea of needing to get revenge, and for both of them that revenge was built on a lie. whereas clive confronted the truth of what happened to joshua and was able to move on because of it, hugo became wrapped up in a deception (albeit externally inflicted) and let it consume him

in so doing, he became a useful tool for barnabas that was then discarded as soon as his purpose of giving clive titan was fulfilled. his revenge amounted to nothing. but that is not to say that vengeance is being condemned by the narrative, rather, being blinded by it is.

clive, having seen and accepted the truth, exacts a much more righteous retribution on hugo for having destroyed the hideaway and having killed so many, all because of a lie that cid had killed benedikta

rather than let the need for vengeance rule him, clive wields it only when it is deserved. he overcomes the manipulation where hugo does not, and hugo suffers the consequences where clive emerges victorious

Dion Lesage

dion is similar to benedikta in that he exemplifies the outcome of a path that clive could have walked, but ultimately escaped from: to be used as a weapon, and to be trapped by his desire for approval from a parental figure. had clive been revealed to be a dominant much earlier in his life, there is no doubt in my mind he would have been in the same position that dion ended up in with his father. i've written about it more extensively in this post, so i won't repeat all of it

the gist of it is that dion is a tragic hero from beginning to end- unlike clive, he is unable to escape his fate. he embodies the self-sacrifice and endless striving for a parent's affection despite never being good enough

the sidequest with tomes is especially heartbreaking when keeping this in mind, because unlike clive who was able to accept the "sin" he committed in "killing joshua" (as well as actually killing rodney), dion cannot forgive himself for the sin of killing his father and destroying twinside

like i mention in the post i linked, it's no coincidence that clive reunites with joshua in the same scene where dion's sin is born. clive lets go of his guilt and moves forward, whereas dion becomes entrenched in his guilt to where it drives him to sacrifice his very life in an attempt to make up for it

on top of that, when you look into additional lore you see what a horrible person sylvestre truly was. ultimania reveals he had dion's mother assassinated in order to hide that he was born to a commoner, and a courtesan at that, and used dion's status as bahamut's dominant to become emperor. then you realize the full depth of the tragedy that is dion's story

dion died trying to redeem himself to a man who saw him as nothing but a tool, and had fully deserved to be killed by his hand all along

Jill Warrick

jill is, pretty much, what keeps clive's will from breaking

their romance absolutely cannot be separated from this, so even if you personally might not ship these two, canon is very clear about this

jill has always given clive the strength to carry on, more than anyone else. when he first finds her during his assassination mission at the nysa defile and realizes that it is her, he is ready to abandon his quest to avenge joshua and die together with her when they are about to be overrun by the iron kingdom's soldiers. and when she wakes in the hideaway later, she is the one who gives him the strength to face what happened at phoenix gate, and accept the truth of who he is

to elaborate on this: the game's mechanics give the major enemies a Will Bar you have to deplete for a reason, similar to how dominants lose control of their eikons when something causes their Will to break, and why ultima continuously tries to wear away at clive's Will throughout the game: willpower is an essential thematic component of the narrative, and jill being there for clive is what keeps his Will from breaking

i think it's very purposeful that the only time clive is truly defeated is by barnabas (if you'll remember the mocking Clive Bested pop-up lol). it's also to hype barnabas up as a villain, yes, but also to exemplify he needs jill--needs to absorb shiva--in order to overcome his greatest adversary yet

there's some discourse about the english vs japanese translations of the scene they share at the beach, and i'm not interested in getting into that: the english dialogue is what encompasses canon to me first and foremost. so, going off that, we get a scene where jill entrusts shiva to him, which might first be seen as clive taking the burden of it from her. which is true, but! it is also what gives clive the strength to carry on

in that way i think the game strikes an interesting balance between what is a "burden" and what is "strength". yes, carrying the hopes and dreams of your fellow comrades on your back is a heavy weight, but it is simultaneously something to draw strength from, because through that same token clive knows he's not alone. jill and everyone else at the hideaway is with him

Barnabas Tharmr

barnabas is clive's ideological foil, another path he could have walked. i could write an entire essay on this particular point alone, but most of it would be speculation and my personal headcanons based on the scant few lines we get from barnabas in-game and the added lore in ultimania, so i'll spare you. if you want to know more about how i see barnabas, cid and clive fitting together in terms of their ideology, though, refer to this post

anyways, this one is pretty obvious: barnabas represents the relinquishing of human will and becoming a slave to a higher power

i've mentioned in past posts before that ultima embodies the pinnacle of a slave master, tying in with the theme of it within the game- even the combat mechanics are built around it, as i mentioned in jill's section. what if clive never escaped slavery? what if he had succumbed to ultima and truly became mythos? that's pretty much barnabas in another form

barnabas is also the antagonist clive tries to talk to the most, even saying to him verbatim during their second duel at the bottom of the sea "we don't have to do this". their fights are not only physical fights, they are verbal and ideological ones: through their battles, they begin to build an understanding of each other, leading barnabas to come to the realization that he never truly relinquished his will at all

this realization signifies clive's ideological victory, and thus barnabas is fittingly the final dominant you fight before you face ultima themselves. every step of clive's journey has been leading up to this: working through his trauma and hurt, finding community and purpose, accepting the truth to no longer be lead astray, letting go of the need for approval and validation, carrying the hopes and dreams of his loved ones, and proving the strength of his ideals

Joshua Rosfield

joshua is the genesis of clive's search and need for a purpose

not by joshua's own hand, of course. he was just a baby, after all, but the birth of the dominant of the phoenix meant that clive no longer had a purpose (at least, in anabella's eyes). if clive could not be the dominant that his mother wanted, then the next best thing would be to become the shield that his brother needed

except, joshua turns this notion entirely on its head by the end of the game

he saves clive not once but twice, first in oriflamme, then later in the rift when ultima is trying to possess clive once more. both times, joshua thwarts ultima: both times, it is joshua who functions as clive's shield. he is upset when he thinks clive has pressured jill into giving him shiva, because he thinks it is clive yet again trying to shoulder the burden all by himself

there are many different interpretations of the ending of the game, but joshua is in part why my personal view is that clive is the one who lived and joshua is the one who died. joshua has always been clive's foremost protector, and through his sacrifice, clive is "released" from his roles and his need for a purpose to make himself useful his entire life

as a result, joshua is the one who sets clive free at the end of clive's journey. that is what allows clive to overcome ultima, who would see mankind shackled to their will, and instead has clive leading mankind to freedom in turn

In Conclusion

this game's themes fuck severely and i will be thinking about them for a long time to come. thanks for reading 🫡

[anpanman95]

JACK AND JOKER: Sacrificing Love against Tragic Love | Old Love vs New Love

They did it again.

Well, they’ve been showing us these contrasting parallels ever since the beginning.

Showing us that Jack and Joke’s new love is all about (self) sacrifice, and Hope and Save’s old love is all about tragedy.

I already knew this, but it hit me hard towards the end of episode 11 with this moment:

First of all this whole scene was an absolute masterpiece. I’m a music composer for the media, I write, study and analyze music for a living, and let me tell you this scene might be one of my top 3 moments of this show just because how the music was treated here. (The music actually adds on to the point I’ll make in a bit, by the way)

First, we have our self-sacrificing lovers. Jack and Joke’s love has been all about self sacrifice since the very beginning, starting with Joke turning himself to the police to set Jack free

and coming to a full circle moment when he gives the ring to Boss in exchange for Jack’s freedom, once more.

Joke has sacrificed himself, their love, and their happiness for the sake of others (in this case, Jack) twice.

They fight for the world. Their love is new love. They have a lot they need to go through to put themselves first, to put their wants and desires first.

Then, we have our tragic lovers. Their love is old love. They’ve been fighting against the world for each other, to finally be together and free, for a long time (even if it isn’t explicitly said, it’s evident when you see the lengths they’ll go for each other)

They don’t sacrifice their love, they sacrifice the world. And it has nothing to do with their personalities, or that they are bad people. It’s just they are so damn tired of everything they only have each other to rely on. They only have each other.

But where does that lead them?

To more tragedy.

[the music on this scene was impecable]

Jack and Joke’s new love still has room to grow, which is why they can sacrifice it. They let the world come in between them for the sake of others, while still loving each other dearly.

But again, their love is new. Fresh, still technically untouched and unharmed by outside things out of their control. Yes, the world is against them, but their reluctance to choose each other relies solely on their own fears and sense of responsibility to the world and their loved ones.

Hope and Save do not have that luxury, and don’t even want to have it. Their love comes first, because God knows how long they’ve been fighting for it. Old love that certainly already went through everything you can imagine.

It’s true we don’t get much of their backstory, but through their actions we can tell why they won’t sacrifice their love for anything.

Can you imagine what they might have gone through? What their love has faced?

Of course, they choose each other above all things, they had enough.

Jack and Joke will choose each other in the end, but they still have a long way to go (season 2? haha yes i’m delusional)

This doesn’t mean Jack and Joke don’t love each other enough. But even though they’ve known each other for a long time, they haven’t loved each other for that long.

Their feelings appeared five years ago in a little spark of life but it was so short lived they simply didn’t get the chance to even acknowledge it before the world came in between them full force.

The spark was only re-born and ready to be noticed when they finally had a moment to breathe, a moment of peace with no other worries coming in between.

Hope and Save have already gone through all that, have truly gone to hell and back.

Hopefully they’ll get their heaven soon.

Honestly I did not feel so much for them in the beginning. Their scenes felt underwhelming, and I wasn’t keen on them. But this episode left me absolutely in pieces. My opinion on them did a full 180.

They broke my heart.

I do hope they get their happy ending. They deserve it as much as our main couple.

Thanks for reading! Leave your thoughts, I love reading them❣️

[melithril]

[Adar] Perspectives

♫ - Safe & Sound - Taylor Swift & The Civil Wars

A/N: For @zanytimetravelcupcake, thank you for the request! I learned so much, so I hope you enjoy! If you all want a good learning curve, go check out kintsugi! <3

Adar did not see the point anymore. Of course, his point was his children. No matter how pointless things felt, he had to survive and be brave for them. To him, they deserved the world, and he would give it to them in every way he could if it meant they would feel as though they belong. Adar believed they deserved that much, that they deserved the happiness that came with having a  homeland, even if that meant it must happen in the absence of his own happiness. 

That wasn't to say Adar was particularly unhappy, though. While he may not be the most content of people, he most certainly had his reasons for that. He had small bits of happiness in his life, however. His children, seeing them grow from little uruks into adults, into warriors who had withstood so much hatred from Middle Earth. Then, there was you. 

You had come into Adar's life when he needed someone the most. You had walked through the door and before long, Adar found himself hoping you would never open it again. At first, he chided himself for feeling such emotions, as he had given up on love a long time ago. Though, as time passed, Adar realised that you were not bad for him, and had actually helped start to heal him. He may never be the person he used to be, but your existence in his life had meant that there was something for him to wake up for, and a reason for him to get through each day.

There were some days, such as today, where existing felt like the worst thing in the world to have to do. Adar bore a lot of weight on his shoulders, the burden of leadership got heavier as the days passed by. He would not show it often, but you could tell when something was not right. 

"Adar?" you questioned lightly, not seeing him at his desk when you entered the room. Instead, he was looking out of the window in his chair leaning on one arm. 

"Ilmarë," he replied with a soft tone, unmoving. Even on his worst days, Adar would never take his feelings out on you. 

Striding over to him, you knelt beside his chair and took his uncovered hand in your own. As you glanced up, you noticed he was more stern faced than usual. Where his features would normally be soft, instead they were harsh, and you knew his thoughts were plaguing him again.

"What is the matter, Adar?"

He sighed, running his hand through your hair and holding your face in his hand. Adar looked down to you, his eyes meeting your own, and you saw nothing but love in the way he stared. 

"Why do you love me, starlight?"

You almost flinched at his question, but from his tone you knew he was not finished. You hated when he felt like this. Not because it was an inconvenience, far from it, but more because you hated him feeling bad when, to you, he deserved everything. Instead of answering, you nodded in response to ask him to continue. 

"Well," he started, his hand back on the arm of the chair and his gaze once again landing on outside. "You could have anybody in Middle Earth, and I do not understand why it would be me that you would choose. I am broken, perhaps beyond repair. But you, you are full of life, my star. So much of it is ahead of you, I believe I would not suit that."

It tore a hole in your heart to hear that. To hear that the one person you loved most in this world thought so little of himself. To look upon him now and see the often stoic and calm lord, now with his eyes glazed over and voice wavering. You knew when you met him that he was vulnerable, and very susceptible to bouts of uncertainty, however little he may show it to others. Trying to think on the spot of how to help, you disappeared into your room and came back holding a small vase. 

"Here," you started, kneeling beside Adar's seat and staring up at him. "I want you to look at this." 

His brow furrowed as he took the miniature piece of porcelain and eyed it, turning it around in his hands. It was a black vase, no bigger than your forearm, and running through one side of it was a sliver of gold lacquer, holding it together as it clearly had been broken in the past. Adar shifted in his chair to face you a little more, inquisitive as to what exactly he was holding. 

"What might this be, my star? Other than a fine piece of work, that is."

You smiled. "I want you to have it. It is a gift."

"Thank you, starlight. Where did you get it?" Adar had yet to take his eyes off the art, clearly enjoying it.

"It is a vase made for me as a child by my mother," you began, grabbing a chair and pulling it up in front of him so you were face on. "It didn't always look like that, though. It was pure black when it was brand new. I kept it clean every day, and it was my favourite possession as I grew up. A few years ago it broke, the corner piece there was shattered."

As you turned the vase in his hands, Adar hummed in acknowledgement, and he ran his fingers over the golden rivers now adorning the broken side. 

"It is lovely, but I fail to see why it is relevant to our conversation."

"Because I thought it was beyond repair when it broke. I thought it was broken for good, and that I would never get it's perfect form back again, which devastated me. An older lady in my village took it in, and I watched her work on it one afternoon. She had fixed the side of it, and I will admit, now it is even more beautiful."

Adar nodded in agreement. You continued to talk, hoping something would click in his head eventually.

"She told me it was an art form, it's called kintsugi. This is where you take something broken, and fix it, and in that you learn to embrace the flaws or imperfections. She taught me that things that appear beyond repair are often more beautiful after the fact. I think you could learn from that too, my love."

Adar placed the vase down on the table, with the cracks facing you both as he took your hands in his own, rubbing his thumbs gently across the palms of your hands. 

"Ilmarë, I believe I understand now. Do you really think that of me? You believe I am still beautiful though I am broken?"

"No, I  believe that you are beautiful in spite of being broken, Adar. I believe in the good in you, I believe that despite all that you have endured, and all that has happened to you, that in this moment you are more beautiful than ever. Though I have known you merely a few years, I think that you are imperfect in the most beautiful of ways."

Adar's piercing blue eyes met your own, and he smiled. You felt butterflies in your stomach; even after all this time, the sight of his smile never failed to make you fall in love all over again. His smile softened his whole face, and it lit up with a newfound warmth. 

"I love you, Adar. I stay because I care so deeply for you, and no matter what I will stay with you for as long as you care to have me. Please never forget that."

Adar leaned forwards and placed a kiss to your lips, and you held his face in both your hands, gently running your fingers over his scars. This was an action he used to flinch at, but now he reveled in your touch every time. Pulling away, you whispered against his lips. 

"Never forget that when you doubt yourself, I am here. You are my kintsugi."

[chaoortu]

listen i know i yap a lot about nick and neurodiversity in my fics but it's like. every time i reread heartstopper it really jumps out at me and i'll probably reblog this again with more thoughts as i continue my reread but like.

it strikes me as interesting that despite the fact that nick gets called a chav pretty early on by tao, we never actually see nick acting that way on page. i think the show does a good job at showing how nick has sort of chameleoned himself and stuffed his real personality down but the show is a topic for a different post. in the webcomic we see it once when charlie is teasing him about being laddish and nick decides to act that way for a laugh. on one hand, i chalk this up to most of the early webcomic/heartstopper in general being in Charlie's pov. he wouldn't have noticed these things about Nick because they didn't really notice each other until their meet cute, which is realistic. I think it also speaks well to Charlie's character that he takes who Nick is at face value and challenges Tao's opinion of him. but what jumps out at me is that in harry's birthday party we sort of see the first instance of nick's "meaner" side and it's in the context of defending Charlie. Still! The first instance of this really sunshiney character taking quite a big turn!

But notice how the dig isn't personal? These are all observations about Harry that can be deduced in the context of the material before it. That is to say, despite being friends with Harry since he was like 11, Nick keeps it simple. It reminds me a lot of how you correct a dog's behavior in the moment and I can go on for ages about Nick and dogs but again-- that'll be another post. What follows this really intense moment is another really intense moment when he and Charlie are alone and like yeah, they're teenagers, being teenaged is intense enough. But after their kiss, we have this panel and my God is it one of my favs:

I really love how Nick is framed with flowers in this scene because it really feels like it's him blossoming into himself in this moment where it's just him and Charlie. Charlie is shown over and over again to be Nick's safe person in comic and while they are obviously falling in love way before this, I still feel like this is the moment where Nick decides it's safe to love Charlie (I mean duh, they kiss a LOT in this episode), or rather, to hand Charlie his emotions and feel like they won't be fucked with or used against him. And that's huge! Nick wears all his feelings on his sleeves, he's not even slick about it either-- the fact that Christian, Sai, and Otis pick up on the fact that Nick has a thing for Charlie before he does speaks a lot to the fact that Nick doesn't seem very aware of how much of himself he gives away on the regular. Which again, in juxtaposition with the fact that he's perceived as a judgmental rugby lad by Tao (which, grain of salt here. I love Tao a lot but he's also quite judgmental in his own ways so this is a pot and kettle situation), and the fact that his own mother comments on the fact that he's much more himself since befriending Charlie? That's MASSIVE. I dunno. I could be projecting here but as an autistic teenager who did everything in my power to be like my peers and lowkey hated myself for it, I find this incredibly relatable. We see Nick starting to realize that a lot of his friends are dicks several times before he and Charlie kiss for the first time, and that's also relatable. It took me so long and still takes me so long to realize that people I thought were friends are actually quite shit. Again, I could be projecting but it reads very neurodivergent to me that it takes Nick being exposed to someone who is actually kind to him (Charlie) to realize that his friends aren't kind people. Insane tbh! Something else that got me is that we see Nick struggle with the fact that he really likes Charlie and wants to stay with him vs. the responsibility he feels to regroup with his friends. I don't actually think it's responsibility. I read it as Nick putting his mask back on and resuming the expectations he's been bearing since before he met Charlie and it's a visible struggle for him.

Nick, while pretty unaware of the fact that he can be read like a book, is also incredibly aware of the role he plays in his own friend group and the ways in which he has to perform. But he doesn't like it now. His early love for Charlie really puts things in perspective for him that he doesn't have to accept where he's at currently if he's unhappy and we get that moment of regret where we see that he knows he fucked up by leaving Charlie.

It looks like he's disassociating here. That, or his mind is still in that room with Charlie. It's a battle of expectations vs. what Nick wants. And Nick's wants are never Nick's first priority. He's a pathological people pleaser after all. And despite the fact that he just fully made out with another boy despite barely having figured out that he likes guys and the ethics on Charlie kissing him without asking (teenage stuff, I'm not arguing about it rn especially because this doesn't bother Nick in canon. idk why this discourse exists but maybe i was just making out too much as a teenager) The next day, Nick clears the air. Literally runs to Charlie's in the rain so they can talk it out and so he can be understood properly. He's desperate to make things right with him because 1) he's in love and 2) he cares a lot about Charlie's feelings to the point of putting them above his own later in the story. But the way he does it and the way he sort of overexplains his feelings almost constantly really strike me as neurodivergent. Nick goes above and beyond explaining how he feels to make sure nothing can be misconstrued and that really gives me the sense that Nick is... somewhat aware of the fact that people assume how he feels? Granted, this is coming off the heels of everyone saying he was in love with Tara, so maybe he felt the need to explain himself more since some people think one pre-teen kiss = fairytale love. (ignore the fact that Nick's fairytale kiss with the flowers totally equaled fairytale levels of love for him, lol.)

He literally explodes! Charlie is physically taken aback by his words. This happens right after Charlie has his big "I shouldn't have kissed you this was all my fault" etc. explosion. Which! The fact that Charlie explains how he feels down to feeling at fault and sharing that with Nick, who is very much like no.. no nO WAIT. I LIKED IT. (so much that he kisses Charlie to get him to understand that pre-explosion). And again, we sort of see Nick trying to bottle and be a bit more normal about it immediately before when Charlie tells him he's getting mixed-signals. Nick's response was to unmix the signal and then cry about it because THIS. IS. A . LOT.

For a cis-male character who is involved in a very masculine sport, surrounded by masculine people who are not nearly as emotional as he is(on page at least) the fact that Nick goes above and beyond in this moment where he's so vulnerable to ensure Charlie understands him is hugely neurodivergent to me. He's making sure Charlie gets that Nick loves him, he's making sure he gets that he's not mad about the kiss, and he makes sure Charlie knows he feels bad for leaving him behind. His bases are covered! There's no room to make assumptions about how he feels and I imagine for Charlie, a chronic overthinker, the fact that Nick is so blunt about his feelings all the time must be fucking incredible. He can actually take Nick at face value (at least at this point in the story ). But especially after Ben's gaslighting shit? Like fuck! I'd want to jump into a relationship too if the guy I've been crushing on for like two months ran to me house in the rain, kissed me, cleared the air, and then cried in my arms. I love emotional honesty! It's also interesting to me that it seems like his confusion towards his sexuality bothers him a LOT more than his feelings for Charlie do. He likes being in love with Charlie, that much obvious, but it's this conflict within himself that bugs him. And idk, I could be projecting again but I just can't see a neurotypical teenager reacting like that. To me, it really reads as Nick going. "Okay, I like kissing Charlie and being around Charlie. I'm in love, this is good. Check." but then his sexuality is a huge gray area until he does more research on bisexuality and decides that's the label he wants to use and I think the not knowing is what really bothers him. There's a lot of pressure in queer spaces especially nowadays to be labeled and for Nick, a character who buried his personality to be accepted by others, to specifically be upset at being confused about his identity reads as neurodivergent to me. Nick, by all accounts, doesn't seem to really care about his sexuality except for the way it challenges who he believed himself to be up until this point and what that means to the people around him who think he's just some straight laddish dude, you know? Largely, he also seems rather apathetic towards sexuality and gender in general except when he has to confront his sexuality and how other people will perceive him if they knew what his sexuality is-- hence keeping things between him and Charlie a secret despite the fact that he's never ever been shown to be ashamed of the fact that he loves Charlie.

Anyway, this post got way too long. Enjoy one of my favorite OCD/AUDHD moments between Nick and Charlie. THEY LITERALLY KISSED LIKE TEN MINUTES BEFORE THIS MOMENT... INSANE BEHAVIOR... I love them. The sillies.

[the-bad-guys-2-reportage]

🟢The Bad Guys 2 director & producer confirms Diane Foxington won't have a smaller role in the sequel!

They know of her popularity

Pierre Perifel: "Yeah, she has her own kind of storyline here. And we love her so much. She’s a badass. But, to answer your question, I think we saw the reaction of people to this character, and we knew we needed her. She’s definitely a big part of the franchise."

Damon Ross: "I mean, I’d say the character of Diane Foxington really popped in the first movie. You get a little taste of her in the trailer, but she’s definitely in the second one, and she’s kind of a scene stealer. She’s really fantastic. The chemistry between Wolf & Diane is incredible"

Bonus: about the new message of the movie:

Pierre Perifel: "I think that message is still relevant. It will always be somewhat relevant, because it’s really the story of these villains that are becoming heroes through their journey of life, really, and therefore looking for belonging from a society that hates them. In this story, I think we naturally were led to a different path. In this first movie, our bad guys are changing. They embrace a new life, Wolf, in particular, embraces a new life and drags the whole gang down with him. Like, alright, we’re bad now, but we’re going to go good. And he feels responsible for the rest of the gang, just dragging them into this new life. And it turns out, this new life after prison, where he thought it would be easy to be accepted by society and embraced, it turns out it doesn’t work like that. You come out of prison, you’re still an ex-con, you’re still scary, because he’s Wolf and people don’t trust him. So we start the movie there where Wolf is quite scary, and realising that it’s not easy to live a normal life."

Damon Ross:"I think he feels slightly, I mean, we’re not on the nose with this, but he’s slightly guilty. He’s pitched this good life to the crew, and he’s dragged them away. What seemed like a great thing for “the bad guys” with this new life is not all it’s cracked up to be. He’s like, “Well, what was the right choice? Did I do the right thing?” Wolf ultimately is tested with his decision to go good with this new female crime team,The Bad Girls, who are going to lure them back into the bad life. It’s bringing (the crew) out of retirement and asking them to do one last job."

Interview from theaureview & GamesRadar

Based on the books by Aaron Blabey

[fcrafcrtnight]

"SO THEY'RE MONSTERS. THE WORST KIND - THE WELL HARMED ONE. very well. you're the expert here, jake. you.. how do you make sure that they don't bother us anytime soon? this is our town. yours and mine. and no, i don't know these people, but.. i trust you. we'll make all of that happen. WHATEVER WAY YOU THINK IS BEST? WE'LL MAKE IT HAPPEN." perhaps that showed just how serious she was about all of this. about.. him? yes, she was. she would have wanted to be in control of the situation otherwise, but.. right now, she was trusting him to know better. that meant something. didn't it? to her, yes. "no. i don't buy that. if there is something that i learned a long time ago? it's that there is always a winning move. sometimes, it may be a little more difficult to see it, but.. there is always one. there is always a way to survive. together? we can find it. ALRIGHT? NO ONE'S GIVING UP. NO ONE IS LETTING THOSE BASTARDS WIN." she knew that look. in fact, she may not have seen it in him before, but.. she had seen it reflected in her own face in the past. the refusal to admit what had happened. the refusal to admit that it still got to you. she knew that look - she knew that feeling and right now, it made her feel protective for him in a way she NEVER had before. she took his hand, curling her fingers against his own.

"hey. you don't have to, okay? whenever you wish to speak of it.. i'll be here. if not, that's okay too but.. know this? no one is hurting you again. not while i'm here. i take good care of my family, you know? and you're part of it now." perhaps in ways that one would have considered brutal, but.. no, she didn't care. as long as the people she loved were safe? that was all that mattered. she'd do anything - she'd get rid of anyone - for them. her family. "ouch. talk about bad luck? but lucky for me, i suppose. or we wouldn't be here," wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. yes, this was more like it. "the last date that i went on.. well, you don't want to hear about it. SOME BORING ADMINISTRATOR GUY FROM ANOTHER HOSPITAL. pretty sure i was out of the door as soon as i could. so you see, i.. i haven't been particularly lucky in the romance department either. still learning how this goes, actually." she'd leave out the dates with parker, because he was right. they didn't matter. not in the grand scheme of things, did they? "NONSENSE! you were a great dancer. for someone that was so concerned, you were incredible. enough to sweep me off my feet.. quite literally?" she glanced at him, bitting down on her lip, before nodding. fuck it. what was one day? "i hope you know that you've quite literally achieved the impossible? i've never taken a day off. ever. for anyone. i've gone to work sick and everything else in between. this is new, but.. you know what? i'll do that." she leaned against his hand for a second, closing her eyes. yes, this felt more like it. if anything? it felt like a promise. didn't it? yes. "that.. no one's ever done that kind of thing for me. ever," no one had ever put her first. no one. "and i trust you. with anything, at this point. i'll go where you go." which was not something that she would have said to anyone, but.. jake was different and maybe, she was just starting to realise how much right now. "you know.. it's a good thing we're responsible people or i'm pretty you could have convinced me to run away with you and just.. remain there. being free, just us.. it sounds.. HEAVENLY." @springbandit

Jake let out a soft sigh, running a hand through his disheveled hair as he processed Elaine's words. The weight of hat she didn't fully understand hung heavily between them. He appreciated her confidence and offers, but he knew what Jennings & Rall truly were. What Ravenwood truly was. And he knew they weren't something even the most powerful name could buy its way out of. "They're not just con artists." he said, "They're con artists with tanks, mortars, an entire military-grade arsenal at their disposal. And Ravenwood, the contractors they work with? They don't believe in mercy. You disobey orders? You're nothing. Less than nothing." He paused, willing her to understand the gravity of what they were up against. "I've seen it. Hell, I've been a part of it. Back when I when I was with Ravenwood, we...we weren't good people. We didn't give second chances. And now that they're with J&R? There's no winning moves." Her question about what they did to him hung in the air like a knife. He hesitated, fingers curling against his sides. The memories were too close, too raw. The basement of that pig farm, the harsh lights, the pain; it was a place he tried not to visit, even in his own mind. His voice tightened as he finally spoke. "You're better off not knowing. Some things...They're just better left alone." He looked away, unable to meet her eye as he fought to steady himself for a moment, the familiar thrum of tension building in his chest.

But then, she moved closer, her words shifting the conversation, and Jake latched onto it like a lifeline. His lips curved into a faint smile. "The last date I went on didn't even have working electricity," he teased, tone lighter. "Drinks by candlelight, wasn't exactly by design and it was a far cry from romantic - her mysterious husband returned from the dead. Or rather, we thought he had." He chuckled softly, a bit of genuine warmth creeping back into his voice. "That was the last time I danced, too. Until you. And for the record? Time hasn't made me any better." He reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair from her face. "You should take the day off. Your patients will survive one day without you. In fact, they'd probably want you to have a life outside of the hospital. Besides, you deserve this. We deserve this." his hand lingered for a moment, slowly and gently tracing down her before returning to his side. "I'll show you the stars, Elaine. For as long as you want to see them." he grinned, his confidence flickering back for a moment. "You're looking at one hell of a pilot, Dr. Pederson. Trust me, the air's where I do my best work. Safer than the ground any day of the week." His gaze softened further, and for a moment, the storm in his mind was quieter. "You and me, up there...I think that sounds like exactly what we both need. No noise, no interruptions. Just us."

@fcrafcrtnight