#and im not allowed to eat in my room so i have to eat in the kitchen so i literaly will go hungry on days when im home bc i don’t want to be
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I know its not ENTIRELY the case but I love how Waspinator's like "Dating? Got it. I can do dating. Im gonna be the BEST at dating. And then, i will have unrestricted access to Nap Lap, the most coveted place."
He’s trying his hardest
Worker Bee Pt 17
Waspinator x Reader
• Sprawled face down on your bed, you’re immediately awake when you hear and feel the bed shifting and creaking. He’d stayed in the living room watching cartoons with the rapt focus of a toddler for the bright colors and let you sneak off to bed alone last night. Apparently, he’d finally noticed you’d abandoned him. And you groan when his heavy weight comes down partially on top of you, forcing the air from your lungs. “You’re too heavy,” you groan, squirming to wiggle out from under him and he settles for just his head and an arm against your back. And a leg kicked out across yours. Sighing and resisting the urge to grab a pillow to beat him with, your nose wrinkles. Why does he smell like freshly turned soil? Has he been digging in your yard? He’s behaving at least and you’re too sleepy to care about holes in your yard.
• Venting against you, he’s alert until your breathing evens out and only then does he allow himself to recharge. Had checked the perimeter of his hive after returning to make sure all was well. Hadn’t been able to find any pretty flowers with the snow, but he’s pleased with what he had found to offer you. Sure that you’ll be impressed with him and accept his courting gift. And food? He’s seen you prepare your weird smelling food from the tall, cold box and the small beeping box. Simple enough.
• “Little friend?” What time is it? Ignoring as he croons at you, the mattress shifting when he moves over you. If you ignore him, he might go away and let you sleep. “Little friend.” Feel his mandibles slides through your hair and against the back of your neck to make your skin crawl. And then his wet glossa slides behind your ear and there’s no pretending you’re not awake anymore when you shriek and nearly elbow him in the face. “Awake?”
• “What’s have I said about licking me?” You growl, words becoming a wheeze when he slumps against your warmth to vent against your skin. “Can’t breathe.” Hooking an arm around you, he rolls so you’re sprawled on him, his wings flared out under him. And your eyes narrow when you look around. “There’s mud in my bed,” you say, voice that carefully neutral tone you use right before you get angry with him. And he whines when you sit up on him to stare at the mud smeared on your skin from him. Clawed servos resting on your hips, he’s afraid to move in case you bolt. “Why is there mud everywhere?” Knows how dangerous that calm tone is. That his little friend is about to yell at Waspinator most likely.
• “Waspinator’s little friend very lovely,” he manages and that is the last thing you expect from the big idiot. Startling a snorting laugh out of you, because if he thinks that’s going to get him out of trouble, he’s gravely mistaken. “Little friend’s frame very soft,” he adds and now you are laughing, because he’s so terrible at whatever this is? Painfully awkward flirting? That thought sobers you, because no. There’s no way he’s flirting. “Pretty scent.” Yeah, nope. This is getting uncomfortable now.
• “I smell like dirt right now, but thanks,” you mutter, sliding off of him to make his frame strain and another buzzing whine escapes him. Rolling onto his side to watch you purse your soft lips and examine the room, his antenna go back when you smile. “There’s more dirt, isn’t there?”
• “Prepared food for little friend,” he says, words a bit too quick as he rolls off your bed and follows you down the hall. How is there mud on the ceiling? Squinting back at him, that he’d fixed you food is especially horrifying. Bug breath eats silverware. And he bumps into you when you stop short at the living room. Is that an azalea bush? Roots and all? And what is that stink? “Flowers for little friend. Dating.” What are the symptoms of a stroke, because you can’t breathe right now, staring at the mess. Dating? What does he mean dating? And the fire alarm chooses right then to start screaming.
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𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 … you meet a lovely man at a rooftop bar your friends have been raving about but came across an unexpected connection
✦ ... you walked up the stairs following behind your three friends as they squealed their way to the top. the rooftop bar was dimly lit by hanging lights and warmed up by heaters that were scattered around. it was enclosed by a glass room that had glass walls and roofs allowing you to see the city while also being comfortable and warm. your eyes scanned the room before they landed on him.
the way he looked leaning against the bar counter talking to someone you didn’t bother to look at. the way his white shirt wasn’t too tight but wasn’t too loose framing around him perfectly.
as you walked through the tables and passed many people your eyes never left his. you sat down beside your friends having a perfect view of the bar. you pulled your eyes away from him looking down at the menu to decide what to drink then returned your gaze back onto him only to see one man standing there.
the man that he has been talking to left so he was alone drinking at the bar. you bit your cheek, “do you guys see him?” you asked your friends who said around the table. they all looked back. “oh my — not at the same time!” you whispered harshly covering your eyes.
they all giggled before one spoke up. “yeah why?”
you licked your lips. “i think im gonna go talk to him. he’s cute and i want to live it up before classes start.” you nodded building up the courage as you spoke up about it. they all agreed and nodded encouraging you to go.
you took a deep breath before getting up and starting to walk to him before turning around and sitting back down. “yeah no, i need a drink first.” you let out a sigh.
they all laughed and awed, “let’s get a drink in you then babe.”
the night went on allowing you to have a few drinks and before you knew it, you were sauntering your way toward him with a drink in your hand. you were slightly tipsy but not too much to where you wouldn’t be able to make good choices.
you slowly made your way toward him, “hi..” you said quietly, earning a head turn. “sorry… i uh..” you froze. there he was sitting on the bar stool looking up at you.
he had a soft smile on his lips. “hello…?” he was confused but slightly entertained.
you cleared your throat. “sorry! sorry i just.. i thought you were very cute and well — you look lonely — not that that’s a bad thing though! you could just be independent… or maybe you’re okay with being alone—not that i think you’re here alone but i mean you are… um.” you blabbered until you lost your breath. he fought a chuckle.
he tilted his head admiring the way your cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “i am here alone, lonely if that’s what you call it and thank you for the compliment. you’re very… cute… as well.” he spoke so eloquently. “would you like to join me?”
you bit your cheek. “that’d be great.” you said breathlessly.
as the night went on you both knocked back a few more drinks talking about god knows what. it was small talk at first, favorite movies and go-to places to eat then you got deeper, about how you both grew up and your parents and it was just going on and on and on.
one thing led to another and you both had went to his house nothing but list visible in his eyes. making out on his bed no thought of tomorrow on your mind.
he kissed up your neck, losing control while feeling up your delicate soft skin, marking you as if you were his. he whispered sweet nothings into your ear as you both stripped naked and buried yourself under the sheets.
he touched you and made you feel good in the best way possible. his fingers bringing you to a near orgasm before he pulled them away and couldn’t hold control himself any longer. he pumped his hard cock a few times before lining himself up with your entrance and inching inside you slowly. “fuck—oh my fuck please.” you begged, as he stood still for a few moments.
he slowly moved inside you nudging that spongy spot that has your toes curl. “where have you been all my life, pretty girl?” he questioned when he noticed your legs shake with anticipation. “feel so fighting good wrapped around me. gonna cum for me? milk my cock like a good girl?” he purred eliciting one final moan before you clenched around him.
the slight squeeze brought him to his own orgasm as he spilled inside of you. breathless you both laid beside each other not saying one word.
a minutes passed he rolled over pulling you in by your waist. “is it odd if i barely asked for your number?” a cute awkward tone found in his voice.
you giggled as he buried his face into your neck. “not at all.”
you went home the next day nonstop thinking about that night. you had texted back and forth about whatever came up to your mind before he asked if he could take you out to dinner in the following week. you agreed, wanting to get to know him more.
you told yourself you probably shouldn’t have started to date at that moment because of classes starting but you couldn’t help that connection you felt with him.
on your way to class the following monday you responded to sam’s message he sent about asking when you were free. you responded by asking why he was up so early and stating you would be free on friday.
your head buried in your phone you finally reached your class and walked in with a confident smile but as soon as you looked up, your chest tightened and your heart dropped to the floor.
there he was, wearing a white button up shirt and black trousers with shiny black shoes. he was looking at you, he was writing his name in the board. professor golbach.
you were fucked.
© 𝐬𝐥𝐱𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐯𝐞
#𖦹°‧★ 𝑺𝑳𝑿𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑪𝑯𝑰𝑽𝑬#𝑺𝑨𝑴 𝑮𝑶𝑳𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑯 ᝰ.ᐟ#sam golbach x reader#sam golbach smut#sam golbach imagine#sam and colby imagine#sam and colby smut#colby and sam#sam golbach#sam x reader#sam and colby#sam#sub sam golbach#sam golbach edit#sam golbach fluff#sam golbach fic#sam golbach one shot#sam golbach au#professor!sam golbach
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one awesome fact about me is that if i dont agree with a rule i simply dont follow it. i am so stubborn and my family hates me for it ❤️❤️
#ever since ive started living with my mom she just keeps adding more and more shit i have to do and i think its stupid#so i don't listen 🔥🔥#no food or drink in my room? i was allowed do to that before. kill yourself. you can't stop me#i have to sit at the uncomfortable ass dinner table with my awful fucking brothers? i HAVE to eat what you make#and im not allowed to get my own food because that's rude? kill yourself!! i just won't eat dinner. and i haven't been.#you found some fuckass thing of “family rules” at goodwill and now want me to follow it? no!!#YOU CAN'T MAKE ME DO THINGS I DONT WANT TO!!!!#i cant function with other people is it clear yet#everything has to be done my way or ill start crying because i dont understand how everyone else works
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Huh. If my life was a quote, it'd be "one of those sad ones with a deceptively happy tune"
#quote from MLP:FIW#sorryyyy been kinda angry about my step family all day#sorry but im so tired of my Stepmom acting like she raised decent kids#my step brother is like 25 and living in my dads home. hes unironically an andrew tate fan and treats his very disabled girlfriend like shit#step sister always got compred to my sister who's the same age and put step sis in the light every time EVEN THO MY SIS WAS LITERALLY BETTER#<- like grades n shit#also both step sibs are gross. never cleans up ever. step brother and his gf are banned from the basement#step bro went to juvy when he was 16 and step sis had a trial last year and almost went to jail#also step sis has mono and would rather die than cover her mouth#i feel bad for SB's girlfriend because she has no other support system and sometimes it feels like SB or SS is trying to kill her?????#my dad threatened to kick out the adults if the house is dirty (adults being SB. SBG. SS. My sister. Aunt.)#My sister does SO MUCH HOUSEWORK and nobody cares and im mad#also bullshit rules recently have made my potential eating disorder worse#i don't think its healthy to rather starve than wash a dish but i actually have cried several times over this#not to mention how much i accidentally starve myself#also our food has been less and less because I don't know what I'm allowed to eat anymore because of my step family#also i have to share the smallest room with my sister. its okay tho ilh and i wouldn't want to get rid of her#sometimes it feels like my stepmom doesn't like me or my sisters because we're “weird”. childish interests and artistic#she lectured me about having missing assignments and I started crying#i said i just forgot to turn in some before the deadline and she called me lazy#<- Oops! so close. its actually THE MENTAL ILLNESS#my sisters and i feel like shit#i feel like my safe space is with my oldest sister.#and you all too! i love you guys#i just feel trapped. trapped by my step family. trapped by my own mind.#i was just starting to feel free from the burden of school and she just made me feel more stressed.#i didn't want to study because she killed the little motivation I had#Spanish exam is now “Fuck it we ball”#sorry for the personal post
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doing shitty again wooo yay.
#personal#can my grandma shut the fuck up for once thank youuu#nothing i ever fucking do is good enough for her ! sorry for having a messy room even though you know im actively suicidal and -#-so sick i cant stand right now !#sorry for having 2 missing assignments ! two ! fucking two ! even thought you know i have depression ! im so sorry my highness !#sorry for having the worst fucking year of my life last year can you PLEASE stop FUCKING bringing it up ALL THE TIME#im not allowed to fucking have emotions near her . im not allowed to be anything but constantly happy im so fucking tired#im not allowed to have issues . im not allowed to not eat for 3 days without the passive aggressive ''look who's finally eating'' and the-#- speech on why i shouldnt have the problems i have . I KNOW . I DONT FUCKING WANT THEM EITHER.#she just expects me to be the perfect daughter after 14 years of abuse . you dont just fucking bounce back from something like that .#sorry ill be normal after this . ill shut up#ed tw#suicide mention
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newest chapter reminded me of like a beach episode in anime where it’s fun low conflict that still moves the plot along yes yes
also don’t know bout you but i’m getting never ending rain which yay but also ew cause it makes outside Worse. now a flashback to book one with sokka out tied up to the pole in the rain 😑
i sit Patiently for the next chapter Patience is a Virtue
OH MY GOSH HIIII!!!
yeahhh hehe last chapter was my beach episode. It was a fun mix of ‘ugh they’re so annoying’ & ‘awwww I lub them’
once again Jee has stolen the show, he’s definitely beach episode material haha.
I’m actually fine with the rain, I have lots of grass and trees so it’s happy for the feeding!! … my biggest concern is the hurricanes already acting up and what that means for our upcoming season ahhh…
dum dun dunnnnnnnnnnn….
& I love that you’re being patient because you’ll need to be this chapter is being difficult (i blame iroh & zuko)
LOVE YA GABBYTRIL I HOPE MY FLORIDA BUDDY IS DOING AMAZING!!
#I seriously think I’ll just barricade the door closed and light the room on fire#The room iroh and zuko are in to clarify#I know liab zuko went through a lot & had conditioned himself to be as unnoticeable as possible but that makes him having serious#conversations super fucking difficult#Anyone who isn’t sokka it’s like zuko ceases to function#& of course iroh is just so kind and allowing zuko the room to discuss and zukos just -#UGH HES SO DIFFICULT#anywayyyy that’s my liab rant#Someone come pick up their zuko he’s here and he’s gotta go#I LOVE THE RAIN IM SORRY YOURE BEING FLOODED!!!#I live in a rural area so rain washes out roads but the livestock around here LOVES IT (& eats the hydrated grass haha)#Those hurricanes though ughhhh#Keep me posted friend you gotta survive the summer#WE CAN MAKE IT AHHHHH#I MISSED YOU GLAD TO HEAR FROM YOUUUU#gabbytril4mg#Ask#leaving it all behind#LIAB#this is amazing#ITF#into the fire#ask
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on another note i fucking hate my theater director. lol
.
#we were having fun sweeping the stage and singing that annoying song where it's like “99 bottles of beer on the wall” or whatever#and it was really great! and after a 4 hour set build i think we all needed something like that#and i was quietly singing along while the freshman were screaming it lol#(it should be noted that said theater director was not in the room for any of this. nor was she present for like. most of the set build.#-ok.)#and understandably some people got (more jokingly) annoyed and finally she came in and told the freshman to stop#at this point i was under the impression that we had swept the stage a lot. because we had. but also a lot of people had gone home so we#-didn't have a ton of people there helping#and this fucking bitch decided to SCREAM at the freshman when they said hey what if we did that every time we swept! because it was fun to#-sing while we worked! (we had also been singing christmas songs for no reason lol)#and my theater director shrieked YOU'RE ONLY ALLOWED TO SING IF THE STAGE IS SWEPT CLEAN ENOUGH FOR ME TO EAT OFF OF IT. AND IM NOT SEEING#-THAT RIGHT NOW!!!!!#and . once again. she was not. in the room. for the majority of set build or us singing while we swept.#and we cleaned up a LOT. but there was some dust left over because NO FUCKING SHIT IT'S A FUCKING THEATER. AND WE ARE BUILDING STUFF ON THE#-STAGE CONSTANTLY. IT'S GOING TO BE DUSTY REGARDLESS OF WHAT WE DO. WHY THE FUCK IS SHE SO AGAINST US SINGING IN A FUCKING MUSICAL THEATER#-PROGRAM!!! BITCH THERE WAS NO REASON TO SCREAM AT THE FRESHMAN!!!! FUCK THIS BULLSHIT#sorry i am mad and also i cried after she did that. not in front of her but in the car.#bee.txt
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im so fucking overstimulated lmfoaoooooo
#i need to move out. i fucking hate it here so much. why do you need to watch tv IN THE NEW KITCHEN which is like wide open to the rest of th#the house.. and sit in front of the laptop like 3 inches away but blast the volume using a speaker if ur 3 fucking inches away. meanwhile#all the ovens are beeping and pinging and everyone’s stressed and irritated about making food and ppl are shouting thru the house to be#heard and im blasting music in my headphones on high volume to drown out noise i don’t want to hear when really i don’t want to hear noise#at all. i never want to hear noise. i just want everything to be quiet and i want alone time and space in the house. why is that so evil.#purrs#ive been miserable here for years. but i just can’t get myself to act on the misery. i have no reason to keep myself trapped under the ice o#of my own life but i can’t get myself to leave. and i want to live by myself i think even if i get terribly lonely or put myself in danger f#for being 5 feet tall. i just can’t take it anymore. i want to choose. i want to choose. i want to CHOOSE!!!!!#delete later#and im not allowed to eat in my room so i have to eat in the kitchen so i literaly will go hungry on days when im home bc i don’t want to be#around the noise. like omg. misery and suffering#food
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im starting to feel like ive been replaced by my friend
#my mom's been listening to her more than she's been listening to me#she eats my food and uses my things and sits in the spots that used to kinda be my spots#she invites ppl over when im sick and my mom goes along with it#she's allowed to do whatever she wants yet im stuck at home doing nothing just in case my friend needs me#found out that apparently her and my mom agreed to invite a friend over tomorrow. even though they never asked me#all while im sick and barely able to get out of bed bc of cramps#i have so much to do this weekend but im just gonna hide in my room alone for the next week and a half bc i can't do anything anymore#im so exhausted
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like pirating is so normal 2 me i forget there r ppl who r like antipiracy which btw is stupid. obviously
#LIKE. IDK ITS JUST WEIRD. WDYM YOUR PARENTS JUST.. BOUGHT MOVIES ?????? did you not eat as a child. be serious#that happens sm where ill be like haha. yeah. you guys remember the ol 'oh im not hungry' trick your dad used to pull#and everybodys like what. no and im like no you know where hed be like oh im not hungry but after everybody else ate hed grab the leftovers#it is like annoying. like i understand not everybody grew up in poverty but the way ppl will act like its likee. insane#there was this one time where we were doing wants vs needs for 4th grade#and one kid was like a need is having your own room. and i was like <- shared a room with both of my siblings at the time Thats not true#and everybody in my class looked at me like i was crazy. like ok laura sorry your basement movie theater is bigger than my apt but we cant#all live like that. thats true btw there were these twins and they had a halloween sleepover party and they hsd to invite me bc class rule#and it was so like. there house was hugeeeee we didnt even go to their rooms bc 'they were messy'#but we just hjng out in the basement where there was legit a movie theater. and an entire seperate living room from their main living room#which we also werenr allowed to go in#genuinely think its bc they were forced to invite the poor kids Lmao. so we werent allowed to go to the main house#lest we get our poverty germs everywhere or steal something#but yeah it was awesome. but i also think that was one of my huge Oh life is unfair radicalization moments#but i mention likee. even lighthearted shit from my childhood. and ppl r like O_O THAT SOUNDS SO TRAUMATIC#and its like. the traumatizing part of poverty isnt like#being close witj my siblings and having done a lot of activities outside of like. going to disneyland#or getting a new toy every week. yk...im not saying poverty isnt traumatizing bc it is but its like#annoying that you mention anything abt it and evrrybody in a 50 mile radius is like POOR THANG!!! like. no i think its funny that we always#got rly shitty junker cars that my grandpa sold to my mom. i was joking sbt the fact that my moms never had a car eith functioning brakes#i wasnt like. asking for pity#but whatevrr
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not to sound dramatic or anything but magic is real and I know its real because I swore a contract w the spiders in my room about a year ago to never purposefully harm them or let them come to harm so long as they ate all the other bugs in my room and now anytime someone purposefully kills a spider near me I am momentarily possessed and have to literally restrain myself from tackling the person who did it
#this post is meant to be silly but to be clear i am AFRAID of spiders#so for me to now have a knee jerk reaction to injure MYSELF to protect a spider as a result of an ''agreement'' is. fascinating#like. did i make an actual contract w these spiders? im cool w it if so but i didnt think bodily possession would be included#the agreement is like a year and a half or so old at this point but honestly 10/10 would reccomend. i have almost no bugs in my room now#and i actually see LESS spiders than i did before#we are now Allies#anyways this post was prompted by finding the biggest fucking spider crawling up my sock#and having the mental fortitude to force my fear down like i literally swallowed it and took her outside#normally if they're small i just let them disappear (out of sight out of mind)#and if they're big (wolf spiders are common here) the rules are: if you aren't bothering me i won't bother you#like i had a spider (not wolf but similarly big) that lived in an unused closet for a while#and every morning he would crawl across my sharp shitty ceiling very slowly and then crawl back#and like. he wasn't bothering me. he was just going for a walk#however: touching me or my stuff is off limits#my bed and my desk and my body are places they are Not allowed#i dont kill them still obv but they will be escorted outside#the big big ones i always take outside bc they would die indoors anyways (not enough birds? or whatever they eat. theyre huge)#sorry i got carried away#swear agreements with the spiders in your house and profit#get possessed occassionally but its fine#i also have an unspoken contract with yellowjackets but nothing formal yet#one day when i have a yard ill have contracts w lots of stuff. yellowjackets and bees and stray cats and snakes and possums#i don't like talking to people but i do like creatures (so long as they aren't touching me (<- prone to the heeby jeebies))
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GRAAAAAAARGHHHHH okay im fine
#sooooo so tired today goddd........still in pain i mean when am i not but at least its not proper cramps yet. and stressed and lonely#but whatever i dont care im making a wholeass roast dinner. by myself bc my roommate doesnt like cooking. or hanging out with me i guess#well thats a bit mean i know shes tired this weekend n needs to recover but also shes on call w friends rn so.#i like cooking and sharing food but also to me the kitchen is a social space and when im making food to eat with other ppl i like to have#company for the whole process..... esp when its smth that takes a couple hours!!!! but its ok. mannnn#i mean i cant make her do anything if she doesnt want to be around me i respect that. but still im allowed to be frustrated#i miss living with more people like i dont miss the time period bc i was so mentally ill then but itd be nice to have one more person here#so i feel less insane abt thr fact i have a bigger social battery and need more from other ppl than the person i spend most time with#this chicken smells fuckin bangin tho at least theres that. should be done in 15 then ill rest it while i put yorkshire puds on#and finish off the roasties and maybe ill blanch some green beans too. and ill make a gravy from the trivet#and then put a movie on while i eat bc presumably my roommate will just take her portion back to her room.... and rejoin her call#at least im going out to see a friend tmr. and ill have gym on monday + we might get food after. and hopefully a movie night tues or weds#and gym social again thurs and ill see whos around sat n sun maybe i can convince someone to go for a hike with me#i cant be alone while im pmsing and in pain i learn this lesson every month when i start wanting to kms and then never change#made dough for brown butter cookies too so ill bake them after dinner while i do my ironing n then polish my boots#man i wish i couldve gone to the gym social today instead of doing my weekend chores. sigh..... roast chicken we're really in it now#.diaries#update ok maybe i was just hungry.
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Because I don't care how or what I eat (moldy grapes/bread, paper, uncooked pasta, ants, undercooked foods, stale cereal, freezer burnt foods, pineapples, burnt foods, suspicious meat, raw potatoes, pinecone (only a bite dw), dandelions, expired foods, foods covered with sand/dirt, grass, marrow) I like to traumatize my friends and family with what I'm willing to eat. Now I get an excuse to traumatize tumblr :D
Frozen milk. Thats the weirdest thing I've had and I'm not willing to so that again. It doesn't really freeze like water so it's really similar to a slushie, but the slushie is frozen. If that makes sense.
#theres some more stuff i left out that ive eaten/still eat#but i dont think i want to really get into that unless someone asks lol#this is what happens when youre starved as a kid#your standards for food lowers a lot#for financial and criminal reasons the adults couldnt/wouldnt give me food#i do draw the line at insects though#doesnt mean that if i accidentally eat that ill care though#especially given what the fda allows#talking about the fda#guess i should add lead to list because of the lunchables and applesauce thing#but the government has fed me worse foods than lead so i cant really complain about it#did you know that class d food exists and is legal to be sold?#class c food is what inmates are given btw#people who have commited crimes got better food than i did because the goverment didnt want to waste money on those with government jobs#i dont work there anymore but lets just say that suicide is one of the highest causes of death for a reason#its heartbreaking to look at those group photos and know that some of those kids are dead#im just really tired of being told another kid i knew killed themselves#god its so heartwrenching#eight deaths in three years#have you ever given the keys to a room of someone your age to their friends#because those friends are there to clean out that dead kids room and send his stuff back home?#sorry about that but i just needed to get it off my chest. my family and friends dont understand everything that i talk about#nor do i want to tell them everything that ive experienced and lived through. i cant do that to them.#i just. i cant do that to my family and friends. not how ive seen others react to those whove died.#but oh my god it is worth it to live.#if youre suicidal please wait a week before making any big decisions and have a heart to heart with anyone and call a hotline#if you think you have no one. i promise that you do. go watch the sunrise or people watch or go to a park and read a book#please#youre worth it
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lord give me the strength to put up with a cishet man that's seemingly not been in a serious relationship for at least 5 years--
#i really do love him#and literally all of this is silly little bullshit that i dont actually care about#(because money and circumstance and societal allowance of things of both genders)#((both as in societies perception that doesnt hole room for nuance and nonbinary/nonconforming genders))#but im so use to my queer left-leaning circles that it is SHOCKING to be intimately getting to know a more traditional cishet man#he said he doesnt know how to grocery shop bc hes a man so when he was at the store he just got drinks basically#dude goes to the store once maybe every few months????#and just “doesnt know” how to grocery shop????????#BABE tell me what you like to eat and ill do it AND cook for you#BABE you dont know how to grocery shop not bc your a man but bc you get all of your food from work or the gas station#its a SKILL that you havent built!!!#which is fine and understandable#he doesnt drive and we dont have stores nearby and financially food is a bitch#so there isnt that experience to build that skill up#but baby it is NOT your cock that prevents you from learning that skill i PROMISE lol#and that other thing today that i already talked about#still in shock over that one#and just his room in general!!!#i live in a mess so i cant talk#and his conditions arent gross or nasty#its like empty bottles and cans and clutter#things that wouldnt take long to fix but it just accumulates#and we cuddle on his bed that also holds all of his clothes and vapes and shit like that#and i have depression like fucking hell so i get it but to get like that simply because you dont see a problem with it??#and get new pillows and a new mattress!!!!#i know its an “if it aint broke” kinda thing and its a cost that isnt comfortable to afford working fast food#but!! invest!! in!! it!!!#whores lovesick musings
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❝ not even a little ❞
summary: megumi fushiguro is your roommate, he's also a scary guy... a scary guy that's weak for you.
featuring... megumi fushiguro
content warning: MDNI (18+), afab!reader, roommate!megumi, college!au, angst, fluff!!, alcohol, vomiting (from being so drunk), mentions of weed, hangovers, reader cries a few times, slow burn ish, these two are pissing me off, smut, dirty talk, cunnilingus, blowjobs, handjobs, fingering, cum eating, virginity loss (?), mentions of a cheating ex (there is Hana slander im sorry), emotionally stunted megumi, swearing, megumi is so bad at feelings oh my god, ozawa x yuji mentions
word count: 13.8k
author's note: MEOW– guys i been working hard on this FUCKER!
chapter two
You’re pretty sure he hates you.
Your new roommate, that is.
“Fushiguro, right?” You led with friendliness, hoping to win him over with your charming personality and half the share of the rent. But he was beyond intimidating, standing at the front door, eyes slanted and harsh with boredom. His hair was messy but it almost seemed intentional with how much it complimented and framed his angular face.
He was gorgeous.
Yuko had neglected to tell you just how attractive your new roommate would be when she sent you the address the day before. Though, it made sense that she wouldn’t notice since she’s dating Itadori, not his old roommate.
He looked you up and down as you stood at his front door, a nervous smile twinging at your lips as an awkward tension consumed you. Though he didn’t seem overly bothered by the awkwardness, simply humming in acknowledgement of his name before standing aside to let you into his apartment.
It was nice; very organised for a guy, you thought. He wordlessly led you to your new room, which was Yuji’s old room, and gave you the rundown of the rent and utilities while you tried to not melt at the deep smoothness of his voice.
What the hell had you gotten yourself into?
“You didn’t tell me he was hot, Ozawa,” you grumble as you tighten the group head into the coffee machine. It’s quiet in the cafe that day, just you and Yuko behind the counter trying to shake off your lack of sleep with iced coffees and fries from the stainless steel bowl sitting at the kitchen window. The line chef doesn’t care that you’re stealing the fries, too busy scrolling on his phone and attempting to blink away his hangover.
Yuko takes a sip of her coffee, her brows knit in confusion, “who?”
“Fushiguro,” you clarify, pressing buttons on the coffee machine.
Yuko was your friend from high school and she was the one that hooked you up with the apartment. All she told you was that he was Yuji’s best friend and old roommate before she and Yuji moved in together. She told you he was in his second year of college, he needed help with the rent and that he was a nice guy.
“You told me he was nice, too.”
“Fushiguro is nice,” Yuko retorts, restocking the paper cups next to the coffee machine.
You give her a look, “nice my ass.”
“You just said he was hot!” she laughs at that, nudging your shoulder playfully.
“You can be hot and mean at the same time, they’re not mutually exclusive.”
“Mm,” she hums, “sounds like your type.”
“Rude,” you mutter.
The bell above the door dings, your eyes peeking over the coffee machine to spot Yuji walking in with a wide smile, “hi baby!”
Yuko grins, “Hey, Yuji.” She leans over the counter, allowing Yuji to press a kiss against her cheek with a loud muah!
“What’s up?” Yuji asks curiously, letting his chin rest in his own palm.
“Y/N was just telling me about her first night in her new place,” Yuko replies.
“Ooh!” Yuji sings.
“She said he’s hot,” Yuko giggles.
A big smile spills across Yuji’s face and he teasingly wiggles his brows, “you got a crush?”
“No,” you say defensively. “I don’t even know him.”
“You can crush on someone and not know them,” Yuji shrugs.
“I don’t think you can.”
Yuji tuts, “ah-ah! Jennifer Lawrence, I don’t know her, but I have a crush on her.”
You look to Yuko, “you gonna let him say that?”
Yuko shrugs sheepishly, “I have a crush on her too so I think it’s okay.”
Yuji points at her, “see?”
You just playfully roll your eyes, “but seriously… What's the secret? Cus I think he already wants me to move out.”
“Fushiguro just takes time to warm up to people,” Yuji explains. “Just give it time.”
You wonder how long it’ll take for him to warm up to you. You’re a friendly person and you’re pretty bubbly but he just intimidates the hell out of you. But his apartment was way nicer than any of the other apartments near campus. And bonus points because the rent was rather cheap compared to other places you’d seen. So you can’t screw this up.
But again, you’re pretty sure he hated you.
He was always grumbling around and seemed to get annoyed when you would put the dishes away in the wrong spots (though he never outright told you this). And he seemed to get annoyed when you were in a shared space, either sitting down on the floor in front of the TV to study or at the kitchen counter with your textbooks strewn about.
But no way in hell were you going to poke the bear and ask him if he hated you.
Because Megumi Fushiguro was a scary guy.
You think you’ve screwed yourself when Megumi makes a bee-line for you a few weeks later.
You’re sitting at your desk in your room with the door slightly open. You’re focused on the essay you’re trying to edit but it’s hard to ignore the dark and brooding cloud that is Megumi Fushiguro.
“You touch my shit?” He asks. It doesn’t sound mean or accusing but just the depth of his voice alone makes you nervous.
“Huh?” You squeak out, eyes shifting nervously.
“My clothes,” he holds out a folded shirt for emphasis, his other hand holding your door frame (and jesus christ his muscles look so good).
Fuck.
You gulp, “u-uh, yeah, I did. I needed more darks so I just… used some of yours…”
Megumi just stares at you, steely eyes narrow and harsh.
You smile sheepishly, though it’s not really a smile, more of a nervous twitch in your lips, “I’m sorry–”
“Just,” Megumi starts before he sighs, “don’t touch my shit.”
You nod quickly, “right. I’m sorry.”
It’s funny.
You’ve only been here for a few weeks and Megumi is growing more and more frustrated by you.
How you always manage to be there when he’s trying to use the shower or the kitchen or do his laundry. He realises the irony given you’re his fucking roommate but he can’t cope with this shit.
He finds himself staring when you walk around in tiny shorts and tight tank tops. Or when you slink down the hallway wrapped in a towel like he can’t see you. Or when you stretch your arms above your head while you’re studying, your shirt riding up and giving him the perfect view of your tummy–
Megumi stands outside the bathroom door, towel and a change of clothes in hand.
He knew girls took a while in the shower but this? You’d been in there for around fifteen minutes, the shower running and your music playing softly from inside. Megumi and Yuji used to function fine with one bathroom between the two of them, but sharing with you, a girl, proved to be a little different.
“M’so sorry,” you squeak as you pull the door open, your hair wet and combed back, your face free of your usual makeup.
“S’fine,” Megumi murmurs.
You quickly duck your head and slink away and Megumi just fucking stares. His breath gets caught in his throat at the sight of your towel pulled tight around your body, giving him a perfect view of the outline of your ass. His eyes raked over your bare shoulders and he almost felt dizzy at the lingering smell of your strawberry scented shampoo.
Megumi coughed into his fist, feeling a certain stiffness in his pants making itself known. It’d been a while since he got laid so he’d just deal with it using a cold shower and thinking about violent video games or something.
You’re finding you have the same problem.
You feel your face flush when he comes home from the gym in compression shirts and sweatpants, an earbud stuck in his ear and his skin covered in a thin sheen of sweat. And you just sit there in the living room gawking like an idiot as he mumbles an annoyed ‘hey’ then proceeds to ignore you the rest of the night.
He’s caught you staring a few times, especially when you’re waiting for him to get out of the shower so you can use the bathroom and he emerges wrapped in nothing but a towel, his hair dripping water down his pale chest.
And you totally check him out before slapping a hand over your eyes, cheeks flushed as you squeak out an embarrassed, “sorry!”
He just rolls his eyes with a huff and disappears into his room, leaving you to bang your head against the wall because you’re so dumb.
Yuji was right, you do have a crush.
It’s truly a tragic predicament because he seems to have no interest in you. He barely acknowledges you, humming when you greet him and brushing past you when you’re using a shared space at the same time. It’s almost as if he’s actively avoiding you.
“I made you a coffee,” you’re trying to break the ice somehow because Megumi is so unbelievably unreadable that it hurts.
Megumi looks at you, half-lidded eyes tired and bored as he studies your nervous expression. You place the mug of hot coffee on the counter next to his set up of textbooks, notebooks, pens and his laptop.
You fiddle with your hands, “it’s just coffee and milk, I didn’t know if you wanted sugar–”
“Thanks,” he simply says, nodding with a tight-lipped smile before sticking his earbud back in his ear.
You stand there dumbfounded for a moment before you awkwardly shuffle off to your room. Completely missing how Megumi watches you leave.
Once midterms roll around, Megumi disappears off the face of the earth. You don’t see him for weeks because he’s either cooped up in his room or he stays late on campus and you hear him get home at stupid hours of the night.
The next time you see him is at a party.
The frat house you’re at is packed with college students all at varying stages of drunkenness. You’ve maybe had half a drink, deciding to hide away in the kitchen and people-watch. Yuji and Yuko convinced you to come along since midterms were over and the stress swallowing the entire college campus had seemed to somewhat dissipate.
One party wouldn’t hurt.
“Yooo! Y/N you made it!” Yuji exclaims, an arm thrown around Yuko’s shoulders, the two of them clutching red plastic cups full of some mysteriously coloured alcohol.
“Yeah, I thought I’d try and make some friends,” you reply as Yuko hands you a drink.
“Damn, then what are we?” Yuji’s teases, gesturing between himself and Yuko.
You roll your eyes playfully, “more friends, Itadori,” you clarify.
Yuji was a guy that was easy to get along with, always making friends no matter where he went. You became fast friends with Yuji after he and Yuko started dating since you were instrumental in convincing Yuko to give her number to him way back when.
“You and Fushiguro friends yet?” Yuko asked curiously, slightly yelling over the music.
You grit your teeth, “don’t think so. I put the dishes away wrong once and I think he’s hated me ever since.”
Yuji blows a raspberry, “yeah right, you should try and talk to him tonight, maybe hit on him, hm?” Yuji wiggles his eyebrows at you.
“Why tonight?” You ask curiously.
“Cus he looks lonely,” Yuji points to the other end of the room.
You follow his finger and spot that familiar mop of messy black hair rather quickly. He’s leaning against the wall cradling a drink and damn he looks good in the black shirt he’s wearing, allowing you to totally check out and gawk at his lean muscular arms. He looks beyond bored, his steely blue eyes scanning the crowd with complete disinterest.
You didn’t even know he was coming to this thing and now you’re suddenly motivated to stay.
You gulp down the lump in your throat before squeezing the plastic cup of whatever the fuck in your hand. You lift it to your lips and chuck it back, the bitter alcohol burning your throat on the way down.
“Atta girl!” Yuji exclaims, “go get your man!”
“You’re for the girls, you know that, Yuji?” You grin.
“I’ve been told,” he beams happily.
You take Yuko’s drink off her and quickly throw hers back too, needing some liquid courage to get you over there because at least if you say something stupid, you can blame it on the alcohol.
“Okay, maybe don’t overdo it,” Yuko pats your shoulder.
You take in a breath before nodding and squeezing past your friends, making your way toward your roommate. You didn’t even know he would be at this party, that’s how little you talk to one another. Yet you find yourself getting nervous and stupid around him.
You’re barely five meters away from him when you stop dead in your tracks.
A blonde girl approaches Megumi, her shoulder bumping his as she leans against the wall next to him. He eyes her before taking a sip of his drink. You don’t hear what she says but he seems vaguely amused by it and you find yourself almost jealous that some random girl managed to get more emotion out of Megumi in the last two seconds than you have in the past two months.
Your heart thumps in your chest and you suddenly feel small and ridiculous. You clear your throat and quickly spin on your heel, heart thumping in your ears as you pick up another drink of whatever crazy jungle juice they’re serving at this frat party and chuck it back.
He doesn’t even know it and he just crushed your spirit.
“Uh oh,” Yuji grits his teeth.
“Why’s she coming back?” Yuko asks Yuji.
“I’m going to stand on a highway,” you grin maniacally. Yuko and Yuji peer behind you and spot the same blonde girl talking to Megumi, only this time she’s turned toward him, giving him her undivided attention as she yaps on about something. Megumi still seems vaguely uninterested but he nods along slowly.
“Yikes,” Yuji cringes, “not him talking to his ex.”
“Ex?” you squeak out.
Yuko nudges Yuji’s shoulder, giving him a ‘what the fuck, bro?’ look. Yuji quickly stammers, “I-I mean, they’ve been broken up for like two years, there’s nothing there.”
You don’t believe him for a second because it certainly didn’t look like nothing. You peek back over your shoulder and watch as Megumi chugs the rest of his drink and leaves, the blonde girl trailing behind him. Great, they’re gonna go have sex and you’re stuck having a crush on your roommate who will probably kick you out when he gets back with her.
Great.
Great.
You turn back to Yuji and Yuko with a wide-eyed nervous smile.
Yuji grits his teeth, “you okay, Y/N?”
You squeak, “mhm, so good!”
Yuko and Yuji share a look with each other before Yuko sighs, “he’s not worth it anyway, you’re a catch, if he can’t see it then he’s stupid.”
You know she’s trying to make you feel better and you’re a relatively confident person, but when you start to crush on someone and they don’t offer any kind of reciprocation for your feelings, you start to feel a little… not so confident.
Yuko and Yuji try to make you feel better, introducing you to their other friend Nobara who is much more aggressive in her pep talk.
“You’re a hot, sexy mama!” Nobara shakes your shoulders, her speech slurred slightly. “Who cares about that emo hoe anyway!”
You want to laugh but she honestly kind of scares you.
“You gotta get laid by some other guy! A hot guy!” Nobara hiccups, taking another swig from her cup. “Maybe fuck your ex or something! Or, or, or! Fuck one of Fushiguro’s classmates!”
“Uh, I don’t think losing my virginity at a party is exactly ideal,” you reply.
Nobara’s eyes bulge out of her head, “you’re a virgin!?” She says it so loud that a few heads turn and you shush her quickly.
“Tell the whole campus why don’t you?” You scold in a hushed tone.
“You’re hot though, babe,” she hiccups again. “You could pull anyone!”
“Funny.”
“I’m serious!”
You let loose after that, deciding to drink and do shots to avoid thinking about Megumi as if you don’t keep looking for him all night. You’re always peeking over your shoulder, searching for him in the crowd and flat out ignoring the guys Nobara and Yuko attempt to introduce you to.
You’re not interested in the pre-med students or the business students or whatever the fuck.
You’re more interested in the tall, lean, handsome vet student who happens to be your roommate and who you haven’t seen all night.
After many more rounds of shots, a game of beer pong and poorly deciding to bet Yuji you could drink him under the table; you’re so drunk. You stumble around the party, hanging off Yuji, Nobara and Yuko since they are clearly equally as drunk as you with how they encourage your behaviour.
Your head is fucking spinning and you feel like you’re going to be sick.
You stumble around the house, clutching the wall and stair bannister as you attempt to find the bathroom. You open a few random doors, spotting people making out, some other people fighting before you finally find the bathroom, bile rising in your throat and your vision going fuzzy. You find a bunch of people smoking what smells like weed in the bathroom, the smell hitting you in the face like a brick wall.
They all start yelling at you to shut the door and you quickly slam it shut before you stumble back down the stairs, racing to the back door as you feel the vomit start to claw up your throat. You shove the door open, the outside air freezing cold and nipping at your hot skin.
You half crawl toward the back fence, your stupid heels betraying you as you pathetically fall to your knees and throw your guts up in the garden.
Your brain is on fire and your stomach aches as you throw up all the alcohol in your system. You really shouldn’t have been mixing your alcohols, but Nobara was so convincing and Megumi had just stomped on your heart.
You suddenly feel two cold hands against your head, brushing over your ears as they pull your hair into a makeshift ponytail, holding it out of your face as you throw up. You’re thankful to whatever stranger is helping you out right now because you feel awful.
Tears prick at your eyes, a mix of tears and mascara running down your face because you really fucking hate throwing up and you really hate Megumi Fushiguro right now.
“You okay?” The man’s voice is distant and a little fuzzy.
You wave him off, “m’fine.”
“You’re crying,” he says softly, listening as you sniffle and wipe your tears away with the ball of your palm. There’s a pause, the man still holding your hair back, “why’re you crying?”
You shrug, “cus I’m sick and I’m s’drunk and some stoners yelled at me and roommate is an ass.”
He hums, “what’d he do? …Your roommate?”
“Nothing,” you whine with a soft sniffle.
“Nothing?” He repeats, his voice sounding slightly amused.
“Nothing,” you say again, “that’s the problem.”
There’s a pause. “Why’s that a problem?”
You groan quietly, “why’re you grillin’ me? I’m s’drunk.”
He chuckles softly, “right, sorry.”
You don’t even know this guy and you immediately start rambling, “my friends helped me find a roommate and everyone neglected to tell me he ws’ hot! And I’m tryin’ to get him to like, notice me, but he’s so mean and I’m like ninety-nine percent sure he hates me. Then he was with his ex at this party right before I ws’ gonna go talk to him! Can you believe that?”
“Wow, he is an ass,” the man says matter-of-factly, validating your feelings.
“Thank you,” you slur before you feel your tummy do a flip and you’re throwing up in the garden again. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, smearing your lipgloss messily. You sniffle again, “m’sorry stranger.”
“S’okay,” he rubs your shoulder, still holding your hair back.
You wake up the next morning with the most vicious headache.
You roll over with a groan, your head pounding and your mouth tasting of acid and whatever the hell was in that jungle juice last night. You press your face into your pillow and groan softly, your entire body feeling like shit. After a few painful seconds, you pry your eyes open, your vision fuzzy and your eyes sore.
You’re in your bed.
Now how the fuck did you get here?
You sit up slowly, your head pounding and spinning with a wonderfully terrible hangover. You spot your shoes on the floor of your room, neatly sitting next to your desk along with your folded jacket. You half remember someone taking you home, maybe it was Yuji? Fuck, you better thank him.
You take your phone off your side table (which was miraculously put on charge last night) and search for Yuko’s number, you press her name and the phone rings a few times before she answers.
“H-Hello?” Yuko groans, her voice saturated with exhaustion.
“Are you as lucid as I am?” You cringe, rubbing your eyes with the ball of your palm.
You hear Yuko muffle a groan into her pillow, clearly as insanely hungover as you, “we got so drunk.”
“Is Itadori okay?” you ask with a wince.
“He’s throwing up in the shower right now,” she replies.
“That’s rough,” you want to laugh but it hurts too much.
“Well he did crash the beer pong and drank half a bottle of midori so,” she trails off.
“Can you tell him thanks for taking me home?” you sigh.
Yuko pauses, “Yuji didn’t take you home.”
Huh?
“What?” you sit up in bed.
“Babe, Yuji was so drunk he tried to pet a rat in the street, he did not take you home,” she says.
You pinch the bridge of your nose. “Then who did?”
“Y/N… Fushiguro took you home.”
What?
—
Megumi nurses a drink in his hand as he watches you from across the room. He can’t help the way his chest tightens as he hears you laugh at something Yuji says, your nose scrunching cutely as you let out a bubbly laugh.
He also can’t help the way his eyes drift down your body, thinking you look cute with your hair done like that. You’re usually wearing baggy sweaters and shorts around the house, he’s never seen this outfit before and he really likes it.
He thinks you look pretty. You always look pretty but this outfit in particular has him short-circuiting like a teenager.
He thinks back to when he got unnecessarily mad at you over washing his clothes and how he’ll never fucking admit it but they smelled so good. He’s not sure what the hell you used to wash them but they smelled amazing, they smelled like you.
Megumi has to tear his eyes away when his gaze drops to your cute little ass in that mini skirt. He feels like a perv. He lives with you for god sake, he can’t be thinking such things about his roommate. Not when he has to live with you for the next few years.
Megumi takes a long swig of his drink, attempting to stifle the thoughts with terrible tasting alcohol and pure willpower.
“Didn’t think I’d ever see Megumi Fushiguro at a party.”
Megumi has to stop himself from rolling his eyes when he hears her voice.
Hana leans against the wall beside him with a sly grin on her face, her shoulder bumping his. He knows she’s doing it just to annoy him, of course she is.
“Why’re you talking to me?” Megumi grumbles out, refusing to give her the satisfaction of eye contact as he sips on his drink because he’s gonna need alcohol or a fucking hammer to the head to get him through this interaction.
“Can’t say hi to my ex-boyfriend?” She teases, leaning her head toward him.
Megumi rolls his eyes for real this time, “you’ve said hi.”
“Oh, boo, you’re so not fun,” Hana playfully shoves his shoulder.
Megumi lets out a huffed fake laugh, “I’m really torn up about it.”
Hana talks to him about some random bullshit and Megumi isn’t even listening because he knows she’s drunk and she would be stupid to approach him sober. His eyes are instead glued to you, feeling himself get slightly jealous when Yuji puts a hand on your back to lead to toward the kitchen–
“–and you’re still mad,” Hana slurs. Megumi didn’t hear a word she said up until now.
Megumi side-eyes her, feeling rather annoyed by her incessant nagging, “you done?”
Hana rolls her eyes, “I’m just saying you could at least have a civil conversation.”
Megumi feels his eye twitch, “I think you lose civil-conversation privileges when you– I don’t know– lie and cheat?”
Hana scoffs and Megumi decides he doesn’t want to listen to her bullshit anymore and promptly walks off, shoving his hands in his pockets as he attempts to lose Hana in the crowd. She follows him around like some stupid puppy for a while before growing bored, probably going off to annoy some other poor sucker.
She also seems to lose interest when she notices Megumi simply doesn’t care anymore. She does this sometimes, drunkenly messaging him every few months only for him to promptly block her account without a word. He’s starting to think she’s the one that won’t move on.
Megumi sighs when he steps outside into the backyard, sitting down on the edge of the porch and deciding to look busy by scrolling on his phone. It’s quieter outside, the backyard mostly empty apart from a few people smoking cigarettes and vaping by the back fence.
Megumi Fushiguro is lonely.
Lonely in the sense that after Hana, he became decidedly more stoic and standoffish. She was his first serious girlfriend and he was stupid and naive for so long before Yuji and Nobara pointed out the rather obvious red flags that Megumi was painfully unaware of.
Because he was young and she was a little older, so she had to know better, right?
Maybe he really was too clingy and maybe he really did need to stop asking to hang out all the time. He felt utterly stupid when he found out she was cheating on him. It made sense, he was too clingy, too needy, too much.
Megumi reverted back in on himself for a long time, becoming sad and angry before he just stopped giving a shit.
He did a lot to forget about the anger and pain he felt from Hana.
He slept around to forget about her, becoming reserved and aloof over time. He eventually did get over it because why the fuck was it his fault that she cheated on him?
But the things she made him feel about himself lingered.
Made him wonder if he really was too needy and clingy to be a good boyfriend. Maybe he wasn’t respectful enough of a person’s space and he needed to stop trying so hard.
He didn’t go on dates much, everyone always thought he was too mean or rude to ever ask a girl on a date. Sure he slept with girls but they were quick to leave right after with a “yeah, yeah… I can call you if you want?”
If you want.
He just felt embarrassed, letting them gather their clothes and leave his apartment or usher him out of theirs while half-assed promising to text him later. Megumi didn’t know who was using who at that point.
Megumi is shaken from his thoughts when a body almost falls into him. He goes to argue with whoever the fuck can’t watch their step when he sees you.
Your shoes half fall off as you crawl toward the back fence to hurl up everything in your stomach. Megumi quickly slips his phone in his pocket and strides across the lawn toward you.
You’re totally out of it.
Megumi pulls your hair out of your face as you vomit, tears slipping down your cheeks. Your skirt is riding up and your top is pulled low on your chest.
“You okay?” Megumi asks softly, maybe one of the very few things he’s ever said to you. He gently adjusts your top, pulling the strap back onto your shoulder and pulling it up a little to cover the lacy material of your bra. You obviously don’t realise you’re compromising yourself and he adjusts himself behind you to cover your skirt as it rides up your thighs.
There are guys who are nudging each other and pointing at you and Megumi’s gaze hardens on them, suddenly feeling agitated.
“M’fine,” you mumble out with a soft sniffle.
Megumi’s heart melts, “why’re you crying?”
You proceed to sniffle and pout while you tell him all about how your roommate is an ass… without realising you’re talking to your roommate.
He thinks it’s cute, finding you so adorably amusing with how animatedly you speak despite being rather drunk and sick. He finds it sad though that it took you being so drunk for him to sum up enough courage to talk to you.
It scared him how you made his heart hammer in his chest, how your mere gaze on him suddenly made him nervous. But he couldn’t stop himself from staring. You were too cute with your dorky little grin as you stood at his front door telling him all about how you were his new roommate. He made a mental note to curse Yuji out for not telling him Yuko’s friend was a pretty girl and not the six foot two fucking pro wrestler guy he made you sound like.
You can’t possibly have any more to throw up, your skin feverish and clammy as your fingers curl into the grass below you. Megumi rubs your shoulder gently before he feels you slump against him, sniffling and tiredly whimpering beside him.
Megumi goes stiff, unsure of what to do with you.
He should probably take you home.
“M’gonna take you home, okay?” Megumi says, feeling your body go a little more limp as you nod and pout in response.
Megumi easily picks you up, your legs dangling and your head falling against his chest, then he feels like he can’t breathe.
You look so pretty even when your skin flushes a little pale from being so sick and your baby hairs stick to your clammy skin. He carries you around the side of the house to avoid taking you back through the loud ass party.
You don’t make a peep as Megumi sits you in the passenger seat of his car, your head falling against the car window as he pulls your seatbelt over your shoulder, clipping it by your waist. He quickly sends Yuji a message to let him know he’s taking you home, though he doubts Yuji will pay attention to his phone since he seemed to be having a really good time taking shots and singing bad karaoke.
The car ride is silent and all Megumi can think about is what you said.
Maybe he kind of was being an ass to you. He hadn’t made much of an effort to get to know you or make you feel welcome because, in all honesty, you freak him out with how you made him feel without even trying.
So instead, he ignores you.
Pretending he doesn’t notice how your tongue pokes out from between your lips when you’re deep in focus, or how you always wear fuzzy socks around the house when you don’t have classes, or how you do a little jump to reach things on the higher shelves (which makes him melt), or how you still look at him with such kindness despite how piss poor he behaves around you.
Megumi holds you close as he opens your bedroom door, pushing it the rest of the way open to set you down on your bed. Your hair is messy and your clothes are disheveled, a little pout on your cute little lips as you sway slightly.
You fall back onto your bed, your head hitting the soft pillow. Megumi sighs before sitting on the edge of your bed, large hands reaching to pull your shoes off for you.
Your feet look like they hurt, little red blisters forming on your heels and toes. He gently pulls your shoes off and sets them down by your bedside table. You sigh with relief at the feeling of having your feet free of their heel prison.
Megumi breathes softly and just studies you for a moment. It’s dark in your room but he can see the gentle outline of your face and the curve of your cheek. Your room is quiet apart from your soft breaths and Megumi prays you can’t hear his thumping heart.
Megumi lets his eyes wander, unable to tear his gaze away from the soft lacy hem of your bra peeking over your top. His breath hitches in his throat and he suddenly feels disgusting for wondering if your panties match your bra— He closes his eyes, biting the inside of his lip.
You whine in your sleep, some of your hair falling in front of your face as you squirm. Without thinking, he reaches up and tucks some of your hair behind your ear, thumb brushing over your cheek.
You stir at the feeling and Megumi pulls away, scared he woke you.
“Mm, where’m I?” you slur, eyes still pressed closed.
“You’re home, don’t worry,” Megumi replies softly.
“Mm, okay,” you breathe, “thanks, Yuji…”
Megumi’s heart sinks but his face remains unchanged. Of course you’d think Yuji took you home, he’s your friend. Why would you Megumi do something like that for you?
He pulls away from you with a quiet sigh, “get some sleep, Y/N.”
—
“How do you know he took me home?” You ask, shaking your head slightly as you restock the mini fridge under the counter with milk.
You managed to shake off the hangover after three days of staying curled up in bed drinking water, throwing back ibuprofen and watching kitchen nightmares on your laptop with all the lights off. But now you’re back at work being blinded by the awful fluorescent lights and smelling of burnt coffee.
Yuko presses a button on the coffee machine, “he texted Yuji, told him he was gonna take you home,” Yuko replies, her hands on her hips.
You let out a shaky sigh, eyebrows furrowed in confusion because why would Megumi have taken you home when he seems so perpetually annoyed by you?
And how did he even find you? You remember the smell of the weed in the bathroom and people yelling at you, then you remember stumbling into the backyard like a bumbling fool, then—
Oh, no.
“I don’t even know where you went, you’re lucky Fushiguro kept an eye on you–”
“No!” You suddenly squeak.
Yuko gives you a dazed look, “what? What happened?”
You press your hands to your face, drawing out a muffled groan because it just fucking dawned on you who held your hair back in the garden that night.
“It was him!”
“What are you talking about? Who?”
“Fushiguro! He held my hair back in the garden! I called him an ass!” you whine.
Yuko pauses for a moment before she just starts laughing, pressing her hand to her mouth to muffle the sound. You look up at her with the most offended look on your face.
You throw a rag at her, “don’t laugh! I was so mean!”
“That’s one way to break the ice,” she giggles, flinching away from you as you playfully swat at her leg with another rag.
“Ozawa…” you whine, “he must be so mad at me.”
“He still took you home after that though? I think you’re overthinking it.”
“He should have left me there in that damp backyard in my own vomit!” you say dramatically. “No wonder he thinks I’m a fucking idiot.”
“I really doubt he thinks that,” Yuko rolls her eyes, becoming sick of this beating-around-the-bush mantra you’ve got going on.
“I have to pay all the rent for like, a year as an apology.”
“Can you even afford that?”
“No!”
You slug around for the rest of your shift, moping about behind the counter and wishing the ground would just swallow you whole. When the end of your shift rolls around, you feel more and more nervous about going home now that you’ve figured out you called Megumi an ass to his face.
Before you clean the coffee machine, you make a coffee to take home for him since he seems to always drink the coffees you make for him even if he seems annoyed by you interrupting his studying.
Your hands are shaking as you unlock the front door, holding a cup of hot coffee and a cinnamon bun in a paper back in your other hand. Your heart is in your throat as you push the door open, peeking inside.
You see Megumi from the front door, he’s sitting at his desk in the living room, laptop open and a few notebooks stacked beside him. Classes haven’t even ramped back up yet and he’s already studying.
You kick your shoes off and shuffle down the hall, heartbeat thumping in your ears and suddenly feeling a chill down your spine at the idea of facing your roommate who you insulted.
You clear your throat, “uh, h-hey.”
Megumi has his earbuds in but he notices you standing there in the corner of his eyes. He takes his earbuds out, “you okay?”
You bite the inside of your cheek, “I got you a coffee.”
You place it down beside him. He doesn’t take his eyes off yours.
Your knees feel weak under his steely gaze. You quickly hand him the paper bag, “and a cinnamon bun.”
“Thanks,” he says simply.
There’s a long awkward pause before you huff out a shaky sigh, “listen, Fushiguro– I’m sorry about the other night when I like, threw up everywhere and called you an ass–”
“S’fine,” Megumi replies blankly.
“No, really, I was mean and rude and I didn’t mean it–”
“I know, idiot,” he cuts you off again, “seriously, it’s fine.”
Your lips form a tight line, eyebrows furrowed with worry because it’s not fine. You want to say more but you’re pretty sure Megumi doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. Which is understandable, you’re just happy he hasn’t kicked you out yet.
You toy with your fingers for a moment before you nod awkwardly, shuffling off toward your room. You miss as Megumi watches you leave again, feeling stupid for how bad he is at talking about his feelings.
You avoid Megumi like the plague after that.
You’re so utterly embarrassed by what you said and you can only imagine how mad he is about it but at least he’s doing you a favour by not mentioning it.
You disappear from any room he walks into, slinking by and apologising awkwardly when you take up too much time in the bathroom, or bowing your head and averting your gaze when he walks into the kitchen, you’re embarrassed and you feel awful, and it bothers you that Megumi is so vague and mysterious about how he feels about you, sure he took you home and pulled your dirty shoes off your feet and put you to bed. But he also gives you curt nods and vague responses that leave you wondering whether or not he likes you or just tolerates you.
Are you friends? Just roommates? Does he like you? Does he hate you?
You’ve got no earthly idea and the easiest way to survive in such a predicament is to just avoid the very thing that’s causing the problem.
And Megumi is so damn annoyed by it.
At first it was him who was avoiding you, hiding away in his room so he didn’t have to interact with you and now that he knows you’ve been trying to get him to notice you, he’s been trying to linger around nearby and sort of force the proximity because he has no idea how to approach you like a normal fucking person.
He reaches things for you on the top shelf when you can’t reach them, he makes sure to take your sweaters out of the washing machine so they don’t shrink, he even sets aside the caramel flavoured coffee pods for you because he knows they’re your favourite.
He’s bad at all of this. The talking part.
What if you think he’s too needy or too clingy or too much? That would just embarrass him even more than he already is.
Megumi lets you be, assuming that you’re probably regretting everything you said that night after he so blatantly blew you off when you brought home a coffee for him the other night.
But you talk again when your car doesn’t start.
“Fuck,” you groan, turning your key in the ignition for the third time in the past minute, the engine ticking, ticking, ticking before you give up. You whine and give a half-hearted punch to the steering wheel.
You knew this would happen eventually.
Your car is run down and sort of shitty. You have to basically shoulder check the driver’s side door to get it open and you can’t actually open one of the back doors anymore because it refuses to unlock. But you’re broke and the damn thing gets you from A to B, except for today.
It’s raining and your hair is stuck to your head from the mad dash you did from the front door to your car and now it won’t even start.
You’re basically drenched when you step back inside the front door.
“I thought you left already?” Megumi questions from the kitchen, holding a bowl of cereal in his hand.
“My stupid car won’t– oh,” you cut yourself off when your eyes meet with Megumi clearly fresh out of the shower.
He’s wearing grey sweatpants that hang low on his hips and no shirt, little droplets of water slipping down his broad shoulders and chest from his slightly damp hair. He’s looking at you with a bored expression, waiting for you to continue.
You clear your throat and decide the ceiling is so very interesting, “u-uh, yeah, my car won’t start, ‘m just gonna walk–”
“You’re gonna walk?” Megumi’s eyes narrow.
“I mean I’m poor so,” you give a sheepish laugh.
Megumi rolls his eyes, putting the bowl of cereal down on the counter and turning on his heel to pull his black hoodie off the couch, slipping it over his head.
“We’ll take my car,” he says, grabbing his keys off the side table beside the couch.
Your eyes widen, “huh? What– no, it’s fine–”
“Walking in this weather would be dumb,” Megumi grumbles, “just get in my car, idiot.”
You press your mouth shut and do as you're told, trailing behind him as he picks up his umbrella by the door, holding it over your head as you take the short walk to his car. Megumi holds the umbrella completely over you, the heavy rain completely drenching his left shoulder.
“You’re getting wet,” you point out.
“M’aware,” he retorts without looking at you.
Your shoulder bumps with Megumi’s bicep given the height difference between you. You’ve never been this close to him before, well, at least not sober. You never realised how much taller he is than you, it makes you feel kind of safe.
Megumi unlocks his car and opens the door for you, holding the umbrella completely over you until you’re safe in the passenger seat of his car. You curl your fingers around your tote bag nervously, Megumi getting in the driver’s seat.
“Thank you,” you squeak out.
Megumi starts up his car, his car being one of those ones that has a push button to start instead of a key, “I don’t mind,” he shrugs.
You chew on the inside of your cheek, your heart punching against your chest. You take a breath before you look over at Megumi.
“Do you hate me, Fushiguro?”
The question just hangs there and Megumi feels his heart falter at such a question because no, he doesn’t hate you. Not even a little.
It upsets him that you think he hates you, that you think so little of yourself that you let yourself get torn up over what he thinks of you.
He had no idea he was coming off that way, that you genuinely thought he hated you.
He opens his mouth to speak but it never comes out. He’s not sure what to say or what to do to make you see that hate is the furthest thing from his mind when it comes to you. But instead, Megumi’s mind is choked with thoughts and it’s so overwhelming that he just clutches the steering wheel and silently drives you to campus.
He still hasn’t spoken when he parks the car.
The two of you are silent for a moment before he hears you sniffle, his heart snapping in two at the mere sound of it.
“T-Thank you,” you murmur, quickly pushing the door open and shuffling out before Megumi can protest.
No. Fuck. No, he didn’t mean it like that.
“Y/N, wait,” he gets out of the driver’s side, umbrella clutched in his fist.
You’re holding your tote bag tight to your chest as you walk across the pavement in the pouring fucking rain.
“Y/N!” Megumi is behind you, his hand curling around your upper arm and stopping you in your tracks.
You pause, turning to face him, eyes glassy and doe-like as you stare up at him, “what is it?” you force out.
You both hope he says something, anything. He pants, his hair sticking to his face as his steely eyes show the first ounce of emotion you’ve seen from him.
“Y-You…” Megumi doesn’t stammer, he never does. “Take it,” he holds out the umbrella for you.
A silence hangs between you and you sigh, taking the umbrella from his grasp and opening it above your head, leaving him there in the carpark.
—
Megumi beat himself up over it for days.
He picks you up that same rainy afternoon, the two of you not uttering a single word to one another other than a ‘hey’ from him and a ‘thank you’ from you. He wants to tell you everything, that he’s really bad at talking about things and that he doesn’t hate you.
He’s not sure how to prove it to you, the words dying in his throat the moment he shares a room with you for more than five seconds. He’s not sure what to say or how to say it.
Hana always told him he talked too much. Which was crazy because Megumi was a man of very few words. But when the two of them would fight, he was always so adamant at resolving the issue and getting to the root of the problem instead of just letting it hang in the air and choke him.
He sometimes wonders if that’s why she cheated.
You don’t talk to Megumi for a while. Feeling small and embarrassed about asking him such a question when you knew deep down it wasn’t true and you just wanted to hear it from him.
But it hurt when he didn’t deny your question, when he just stayed silent and let you fuss over it for days. You’ve lost sleep, laying away at night and wondering if you should just talk to him.
Megumi tries to approach you, he really does.
He thinks about knocking on your bedroom door late at night but every time he finds himself standing outside, arm held up about to knock, he stops himself and wonders if he even deserves to talk to you.
If he even deserves to try again.
“I’m the best you’ll ever have.”
He knew it wasn’t true at face value. He knew Hana wasn’t good for him in the end, but it’s hard to ignore such bitterness coming from someone you used to love.
“Hey, Yuko,” you greet softly, phone pressed to your ear. “Can I ask a favour?”
“Of course… you okay, Y/N?” Yuko asks slowly, her voice gentle.
You pause, “I just… I need a ride to campus until I can get my car fixed. Would you and Itadori mind if I tagged along? I’ll give you fuel money.”
Yuko pauses this time, “…You didn’t ask Fushiguro?”
You toy with your fingers nervously, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
She hums and nods, “We can take you, Y/N.”
Yuko knows you well enough to know that something happened. You spoke so timidly and she could tell you were nervously fiddling with the sleeves of your sweater. She would talk to Yuji about it; hopefully he could knock some sense into his best friend.
It's first thing Monday morning when you emerge from your room with your tote bag over your shoulder and your hair done in a messy claw clip. You look tired, bags forming under your eyes and you make a beeline for the door without even acknowledging Megumi.
“Do you need a ride?” Megumi sits up straighter on the couch and holds his keys up as if he didn’t set an alarm just to take you to class.
“Uh, no, thanks. Ozawa and Itadori are taking me,” you say sheepishly, barely offering him a glance.
Megumi’s heart cracks a little. He wants to say something, tell you he’s sorry and ask if he can please take you to class. But he doesn’t, mouth staying shut as he nods quickly, “right. Okay.”
You leave without another word, the apartment feeling awful and still without you. Megumi’s leg bounces nervously and his blunt nails scratch at the inside of his knee. He’s anxious and he wants to fix it so desperately but he feels like he’s only making it worse.
“Hey, Y/N,” Yuji greets with a warm smile.
You offer him a half smile before getting in the back seat. Yuko and Yuji share a look with one another before Yuji backs out of the apartment parking lot. There’s an intensity hanging in the air and you just stare out the window with a blank expression, vaguely paying attention to the music on the radio.
“Are you okay, Y/N?” Yuji asks softly, eyeing you through the rearview mirror.
“M’fine,” you whisper back, too afraid to trust your voice.
“What happened?” Yuko reaches back between the seats to touch your knee affectionately.
You shrug, “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Yuko pulls her hand away from you and glances at her boyfriend, the two of them making a silent agreement to talk to Fushiguro after dropping you off instead of going to their morning classes.
Yuji slams the door open, nearly sending Megumi flying into the roof with how loud it was, “Fushiguro!”
“The fuck are you yelling for?” Megumi spits, gaze softening slightly after realising Yuko was trailing behind Yuji.
Yuko frowns, “what did you say to Y/N?”
“What?”
“She was upset, Fushiguro,” Yuji crosses his arms, “what did you say to her?”
“Nothing,” Megumi defends quickly.
“Then why is she upset?” Yuko’s brows furrow.
Megumi sighs, “she just asked me if I hated her–”
Yuji cuts him off, “and what did you say?”
Megumi averts his gaze, “nothing.”
“You said what?” Yuko presses.
“I didn’t know what to say–”
“You say, ‘no Y/N, I don’t!’,” Yuji mocks before landing a punch to Megumi’s shoulder, “you upset her, bro.”
“I know,” Megumi grumbles.
“Then why didn’t you apologise?” Yuko asks.
“I didn’t know how,” Megumi dejectedly sighs. “I didn’t expect it.”
“She likes you, man. Like a lot,” Yuji shakes his head, his heart hurting a little at the fact that Megumi looks really torn up about the whole situation too.
There’s a long pause, “can you lie to her?”
“What?” Yuko and Yuji ask in unison.
“Tell her you can’t pick her up,” Megumi adds, “please.”
Yuji and Yuko share another look and Yuko sighs before nodding her head, taking out her phone to tell you that she and Yuji can’t come get you because Yuji’s brother called and needed his help. It’s not a great lie, but you’ll believe it at first glance.
—
Your phone buzzes in the middle of class. You’re tired and you feel like shit and the professor’s monotone voice is boring you half to death. You flip your phone over and read the message from Yuko.
Yuko <3: Hey, Y/N. Choso called and he needs to borrow Yuji’s car, we can’t come get you this afternoon. Sorry hun x
You frown.
Yuko <3: But don’t worry, Fushiguro is coming to get you.
You panic, quickly unlocking your phone to message her back, telling her you’ll get an uber or just walk but you get a message from an unknown number only a second later.
Unknown: I’ll come get you.
You rest your head in your palm and go to message him back telling him it’s fine but the speech bubbles appear and reappear before he sends the message.
Unknown: Please wait.
You let out a shaky breath, your heart pittering loudly in your chest. You zone out for the remainder of the class, nervously chewing on your nails and tapping on the desk. You don’t want to talk to Megumi, you really don’t. At least not while you feel like shit and your thoughts are a huge mess.
You sit on the grass after your lecture, pulling at the blades of grass by your feet while you stare at the ground, teeth nipping anxiously at the inside of your lower lip. You don’t know what Megumi wants to say to you or why he even agreed to pick you up if he was so against talking about whatever the hell was going on between you two.
You’re pulled from your thoughts when a pair of black sneakers intrudes on your line of sight, you know it’s Megumi from the little scuff marks on the edge since they’re so worn out but they’re his favourite pair.
He doesn’t say anything as he stares at you, hands shoved in the pockets off his hoodie like they always are. You wordlessly stand up, pulling your tote bag to your chest and pushing past him without a word.
“Y/N, I–”
You’re too far ahead of him now, making your way to his parked car on the curb. His head hurts and his chest is tight with nerves but he’s quick to unlock the car for you and let you scoot into the passenger seat.
Megumi quickly joins you, turning on the car and just sitting there for a moment, hands tight around the wheel.
“I–” Megumi feels his throat close up, “I’m sorry.” You feel your eyes glass over but you don’t offer him anything else but he continues, “I don’t hate you, Y/N.”
“S’fine if you do,” you say quietly, “I know I can be annoying and intrusive–”
“–What? You’re not–”
“And I understand if you want me to move out–”
“No, Y/N, I don’t want that–”
You’re rambling now without thinking, “–nd I know you probably need me to move out cus of that girl at the party–”
“What girl?” Now he’s fucking confused.
“And she’s pretty and I saw you talking to her–”
Wait, his ex?
“–Wait, Y/N, that’s not–”
“And I’m sorry I was so drunk–”
“Y/N, stop!” Megumi didn’t mean to yell, but it instantly shuts you up. He peers over at you and you’re crying, tears slipping down your flushed cheeks. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell.”
“S’okay,” you sniffle, wiping your tears away.
“No, it’s not… You just wouldn’t shut up,” Megumi makes an attempt at dry humour, letting you know it was a joke by following up with a half-assed breathy laugh.
You just look at him, eyes slightly red.
“I– Fuck,” Megumi curses, knuckles turning white as he grips the steering wheel.
The two of you stay silent, the only thing either of you hear is your quiet sniffling. Megumi sighs, running a hand through his messy hair before speaking, “...she cheated on me.”
Your eyes widen a little.
“That girl you saw. Yeah, she was my ex but… she cheated on me.”
“...I’m sorry, Fushiguro.”
“Stop calling me that,” he grumbles.
“It’s your name,” you retort.
“I don’t want you to call me Fushiguro,” he presses his eyes shut.
Your lips form a tight line and you just watch him, waiting patiently for him to continue because you can tell he’s trying really hard.
“Can you just call me Megumi,” he sighs. “Please?”
You nod, “okay, Megumi,” you whisper softly.
“...I don’t hate you, Y/N. Not even a little,” his eyes finally meet yours.
“You’re really bad at showing it,” you say with a breathy laugh.
“I know… M’just really–” he stops himself, his hand scrunching against the material over his thigh, “I’m just scared.”
Your heart shatters, a pout pulling at your lip because you feel like you’re about to cry again. You study him for a moment, your heart warming at the sight of Megumi Fushiguro being so utterly soft and nervous.
You hesitate for a moment before you reach your hand over the centre console to stop him from grabbing and pulling at his own thigh. His hand is cold and his palm is rough but it’s him. And you were sitting here thinking you needed his comfort when really he needed yours.
He flinches at the gentleness of your touch, your hand is smaller than his but it’s so soft and warm.
He lets you wrap your fingers around the back of his hand, lets you roll his hand over and press your palm to his. It’s comforting and it’s sweet.
“You don’t need to be scared, Gumi.”
His heart flutters at the nickname and his steely blue eyes nervously meet yours. He nods his head slowly and you smile.
“Feel better?” You ask softly.
Megumi holds your hand in his, eyes still searching yours before they flicker down to your lips briefly. You catch the quick movement and your body reacts without any input from your brain, your tongue darting out to wet your lips.
“Gumi?”
Megumi doesn’t need much more motivation than that and his other hand lets go of the wheel to reach over and cup your warm cheek. Your breath hitches in your throat and your eyes flicker between his nervously. His eyes are half-lidded, nose grazing yours and your hand squeezes tight around his.
“S’okay,” he coos softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “M’gonna kiss you.”
Your heart is in your throat and you start overthinking it, thinking back to the maybe handful of times a boy has kissed you, but never a man, never someone like Megumi.
You nod your head quickly and a smile tugs at the corner of Megumi’s lip because you’re so fucking cute.
You feel the world melt away when Megumi’s breath fans across your lips, his hand coming to cup the back of your head, guiding you to tilt your head slightly as he finally, finally, closes the distance between you, his slightly chapped lips meeting yours.
You melt into his warmth, one hand nervously holding his while the other has a death grip on the strap of your tote bag.
His lips move against yours, becoming a little more feverish and needy when you let out a soft whine. He feels himself go feral, wanting to drag you into the back seat and take you in this stupid parking lot where everyone can see.
But instead he takes it slow, pressing your lips against his and his hand tangling in your soft hair. You’re nervous and a little inexperienced, he can tell but it only drives him more insane.
He pulls away only a fraction, a cheeky smile pulling at his lips when he realises your lips chase his, your other hand coming to curl around his hoodie sleeve to bring him closer.
“Wasn’t so bad?” Megumi whispers.
You have the most innocent little look on your face, “does that mean you like me?”
Megumi can only chuckle softly at how damn cute you are, “I don’t just kiss any girl like that, Y/N.”
You nod timidly, “m’kay, Gumi.”
Megumi wants to kiss you again but refrains because he knows he’ll want to do other things to you with how you utter the nickname with such innocence, but you’re in a parking lot on your college campus and there are about fifty people that have walked by in the past ten minutes.
But when you get home?
“Megumi–” your hands are clutching the front of his hoodie as he kisses the side of your cheek, then your temple, then above your eyebrow, “wait a second.”
“S-Sorry,” he mutters against your warm skin.
You’ve barely got one foot in the door and Megumi already has you pinned against the wall in the hallway, a large hand cupping your head while the other rests on your waist. He pants softly, lips itching to kiss you and kiss you hard.
“I’m sorry too,” you say breathlessly. “For not seeing.”
Megumi shakes his head, “you don’t need to be sorry.”
“But I am,” you murmur, “you’re really bad at talking about your feelings but I should have been more observant.”
“S’okay, Y/N,” he rests his forehead against yours, “m’just glad you let me pick you up.”
“I thought about just walking,” you giggle, “letting you grovel for a little longer.”
“That’s not very nice.”
“I’m glad I didn’t.”
“I’m glad you didn’t either,” he smiles softly, running the pad of his thumb along your cheek.
You fall silent, hands just holding onto his hoodie while he presses feather-light kisses to your face. You suddenly feel nervous when you feel a certain stiffness against your thigh.
“...Do you want to–”
“I’m a virgin.”
Megumi pulls away from you, “W-What?”
“You were gonna ask if we could… y’know,” your eyes shift away from him, “I panicked.”
Megumi laughs, like actually, laughs at that.
“Don’t laugh,” you playfully punch his shoulder, your bottom lip sticking out in a pout. “A lot of people are still virgins in college.”
“M’not laughing at that,” he grins. “You’re just… you’re really cute.”
You feel your face heat at that, “stop it.”
“M’serious.”
“You’re always serious.”
“Whatever.”
You giggle softly, letting him press a soft peck to your lips.
“I was going to ask if you wanted to watch a movie,” Megumi lies through his teeth, liking the way you flush and stammer at outing yourself.
“Oh,” you say quietly.
“Why ‘oh’?” He teases.
“Nothing,” you say quickly, brows knit.
“What?” he presses with a shit-eating grin.
“Nothing,” you retort.
“...Did you want to have sex?”
Your heart drops, eyes widening slightly because yes, you do want to have sex with Megumi. You’d never really thought much about sex until him. Never thought you’d want a guy to manhandle you or put his hands all over your body until Megumi.
“Can we?” you ask timidly.
Megumi feels a pang in his heart because you’re so fucking cute he might pass away. He smiles before pressing a kiss to your forehead, “if you want to.”
“But do you want to?”
Megumi doesn’t need to think very hard about that one.
“I’ve wanted you in my bed since I first met you, Y/N.”
You breathe hard, your heart racing in your chest and you’re sure it’s loud enough for Megumi to hear how fucking nervous yet turned on you are. Your eyes fall to his lips again, revelling in the feeling of his breath fanning over your lips.
You press up on your tiptoes, Megumi’s head slowly tilting and following you, wondering what you’re doing. Your soft lips graze the shell of his ear and you smile cheekily, about to fucking out yourself with the last of your confidence.
“Fuck me then.”
Megumi slams you against the wall, arms caging your body as he presses his lips hard against yours. The kiss is needy and feverish, a mess of clashing teeth and wandering hands. Megumi’s hand cups the back of your head, tilting your head to the side to deepen the kiss.
His tongue presses against your lips before sliding into your mouth, earning a soft whine from your throat that you didn’t mean to sound so desperate. Your fists curl around the material of his hoodie, pulling Megumi impossibly closer.
Megumi’s free hand drops from your waist to your hip, squeezing your skin. His other hand drops from your head to curl over your hips and grope your ass. Both of his hands cup your ass, kneading the soft flesh and earning a soft mewl from your throat.
“You sound so pretty, baby,” Megumi mutters against your lips, his messy hair tickling your forehead. You want to moan and whine at the nickname but instead you kiss him again.
You’ve got the hang of this kissing thing but you still have no fucking idea where to put your hands without making him uncomfortable– as if his hands aren’t groping your ass.
Megumi pulls away slightly breathless, “you wanna stop?”
“No,” you shake your head quickly, “no, I don’t wanna stop.”
Megumi grins, kissing your cheek, “okay, sweet girl.”
Megumi leads you to his bedroom, his hand never leaving yours and your other hand never letting go of his hoodie sleeve. He pushes his bedroom door open, his lips on your instantly as he backs you up to his bed. The backs of your thighs hit his mattress and you fall backward, bringing Megumi with you.
Megumi chuckles softly against your lips before kissing the corner of your mouth, then your cheek, then the underside of your jaw, then your neck. His hand paws at the bottom hem of your sweater, his fingers slipping underneath to ghost over the skin of your bare tummy.
“M’gonna take it off, okay?”
You nod sheepishly, “okay.”
“You tell me if you want me to stop,” he breathes.
“I will, Gumi,” you reply with a whisper, kissing the tip of his nose.
Megumi grins affectionately before his hands grip the bottom of your sweater, pulling it up slightly. Your breath hitches in your throat and he slowly pulls your sweater upward and over your tits. You’re not wearing a shirt, just a lacy black bra, just like the one he got a peek of at the party.
“Pretty,” Megumi murmurs, pressing a kiss to your chest, right between your collarbones.
Your fingers tangle in his hair, holding him against your hot skin as he peppers kisses across your chest, finally pulling your sweater over your head and tossing it aside. You’re left in your pretty bra and a short little skirt that finished above your mid thigh.
God how he wants to bite and suck on your pretty plush thighs.
His hand snakes underneath you, fingers fiddling with your bra clasp at your back. Your breathing quickens and Megumi kisses your cheek, “s’okay… m’here.”
He unclasps your bra, the cups loosening around your tits and the straps going slack on your shoulders. His fingers ghost over your shoulder as he pulls the strap down your shoulder, pressing soft kisses in his wake.
“C-Can you go faster?” You whine, your voice quiet.
Megumi chuckles, lifting his head to peer up at you, pupils blown wide, “am I going to slow for you, pretty girl?”
You bite your lip, “mhm.”
Megumi lifts his thigh, pressing it between your legs to where you desperately want him. You whine when he presses his strong thigh against your clothed heat, your skirt bunching up at your waist. Your skin feels hot and you feel a wetness pooling in your panties, making your face flush with embarrassment at your own neediness.
“I’ve thought about this,” Megumi whispers, pulling your bra cup down, his large hand cupping your plush breast. “A lot.”
You moan softly, your nipples hardening under the cold chill of the air in his room.
“Thought about what you’d sound like.”
He lowers his head slightly, pressing long, wet kisses to your pretty nipples. Your hand tangles in his hair, pressing him down and forcing him to nip and suck at the soft skin.
“Thought about how you’d look.”
You roll your hips involuntarily against his strong thigh, feeling the friction against your poor little clit. You moan underneath him, your heart racing as he lowers his head to kiss down your tummy to the hem of your skirt.
“Thought about how you’d taste.”
You suddenly let out a surprised gasp when Megumi pulls your lower body off the bed, your hands curling into his bedsheets for support. You peer down at him, your heart in your throat at the sight of Megumi between your legs, his fingers curling underneath the waistband of your skirt and pulling.
He drops the material on the floor, his large hands curling underneath your thighs and pulling them apart, “w-wait, Gumi.”
He presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh, “what is it, princess?”
“W-What are you doing?”
Megumi smiles against the inside of your thigh, “m’gonna eat your pretty pussy.”
Your hands curl into the sheets and you feel a glob of arousal seep from your cunt. If this is how fucked up he gets you just from kissing you, how the hell are you going to hold up with his tongue inside you?
“You okay with that?”
You nod your head quickly without thinking, a thin sheen of sweat already coating your skin. “P-Please–”
Megumi chuckles softly at how damn cute you are, his fingers hooking under the sides of your panties, pulling them down your legs. They’re covered in your arousal, your pretty pussy glistening under the warm glow of the setting sun.
God he wishes he could take a picture.
“G-Gumi?” You peer down at him, “s-stop staring.”
Megumi pulls your thighs over his shoulders, his hair tickling the insides of your spread legs, “sorry, sweet girl, she’s just s’pretty.”
You let out an involuntary moan when he presses a kiss to your swollen clit, the sudden attention sending a jolt of pleasure through your tummy. You want to slam your thighs closed, your body desperate for friction.
“Don’t tease me,” you whine. “Please–”
Megumi’s fingers curl into your thighs, pulling them apart further and forcing your pussy lips open to press the flat of his tongue against your awaiting clit.
“M-Megumi–”
You throw your head back against the bed, one of your hands pressing against the back of his head, forcing him closer to your pussy. No one has ever touched you like this, no one has ever put their mouth on you, no one has ever seen your pretty pussy and you couldn’t think of anyone better than Megumi Fushiguro to be the one to tongue-fuck you right now.
“You ever masturbated, baby?”
You whine, “a-are you teasing me or something?”
He smiles against your clit, tongue dipping down to lap up your slick, “maybe a little. I just wanna know if you’ve ever had something inside you.” His thumbs spread you open, his tongue flicking against your clit and making you whine even louder. “Shh, baby, we have neighbours.”
You don’t give a fuck right now.
“I’ve masturbated b-before,” you say after a hard huff, you feel fucking breathless.
“Oh, yeah?” Megumi presses his tongue against your little hole, lewdly slurping up the insane amount of arousal leaking from you. “You should show me.”
“No!” you whine, “so embarrassing.”
“I think it’d be hot,” the tip of his middle finger presses against your hole. “Maybe some other time.”
You cry out, hands gripping the sheets when Megumi presses the tip of his middle finger into your cunt. His fingers are thicker than yours and you can only imagine so much longer, able to press against parts of you you’ve never reached before.
“Gumi–” you pant, “m-more.”
“More?” He raises a brow at you.
“Please, please–”
“You’re so cute.”
“Shut up!” you whimper, “js’ touch me–” Megumi can’t deny you, not when you sound so fucking gorgeous and you taste like fucking heaven.
He presses his finger into you, twisting his hand around and curling his finger inside you. You want to cry, your eyes screwed shut and your belly burning. He fucks his finger into you slowly, his tongue lapping and sucking your clit while your thighs press against his head.
“Gonna add another one, okay, baby?”
You nod your head desperately and he smiles cheekily, pressing a second finger into you to stretch you open. You throw your head back at the delicious stretch, your slick coating Megumi’s fingers and dripping down his wrist.
Megumi feels your thighs pressing together harder and he forces your thigh down with his free hand, your knee almost hitting your chest with how he pins it down. He’s spreading you open, tongue flicking against your clit and fingers curling against your gummy walls.
“Gumi– m’gonna–” you feel your tummy burn and you’re so fucking embarrassed that you’re about to cum from just having two fingers inside you. You start to pant, hands tangling in his hair as lewd slurping and squelches fill his room.
“S’okay, baby. Cum on my mouth,” he groans against you, his cock rock hard from feeling your hips grind against his face. You might be a virgin but your body knows what it wants as you rut against his tongue and your legs shake.
Megumi suddenly shakes his head over your clit, his mouth covered in your slick and you just cum. It crashes into you like a fucking train and you whine and moan against the back of your hand as Megumi fucks his fingers into your sopping cunt, your hole spasming and clenching down on his fingers.
He scissors and curls his fingers inside you, fucking you through your orgasm and feeling a sense of pride but also getting a huge fucking ego boost that he’s the first man to ever make you cum.
Your chest is heaving up and down, your vision cloudy and your mind feeling fuzzy as you come back down from your high. Megumi pulls his fingers out of you, kissing the inside of your thigh and lapping up the mess you made all over yourself.
You sit up on your elbows, face flushed and hair dishevelled as you peer down at Megumi. You suddenly feel immensely embarrassed that he was just between your legs, his tongue flicking over your clit and his fingers deep inside you.
“Fuck, you taste better than I imagined,” Megumi licks his fingers clean while holding eye contact with you.
You whine and flop back onto the bed, earning a soft chuckle from Megumi as he gets to his feet, attempting to find a towel or old shirt somewhere.
“Where are you going?” You ask timidly.
“M’gonna clean you up, don’t worry, I won’t go,” he replies, quickly pressing a kiss to your forehead.
“But…” your eyes flicker to the obvious bulge in his pants.
“Hm?” He follows your gaze. “Oh, m’okay, princess. It’s not about me anyway.”
“But, I want to–”
“S’okay, Y/N,” he lifts your hand, kissing your knuckles softly, “you can try some other time.”
“...Do you not want to?”
He grins, “course I want to.”
“Then let me,” you whine, pulling him closer to you. “Please.”
Megumi ponders it for a moment. He doesn’t want to frighten you and he’s so fucking scared of losing control and just bending you over and fucking your brains out. But the way you look at him with your pretty wide eyes and your hands gripping his thighs as he stands between your legs–
How could he say no?
“You want to, baby?”
“Mhm.”
“Okay… we’ll go slow,” he urges, petting your hair gently.
You’re so fucking eager to please him that it makes him weak. Your post-orgasm body is shaky as you reach for the zipper of his pants, your fingertips grazing against the sensitive bulge. He groans softly, hand petting your head as he lets you figure it out, slowly unzipping his pants and pulling them down a little.
There’s a dark wet patch on his boxers, he’s so fucking turned on by your pretty sounds and your intoxicating taste that his cock is leaking and begging for attention.
“S���big,” you whisper, eyes widening.
And he hasn’t even pulled his cock out of his boxers.
He chuckles, “you flatter me, pretty.”
“N-No, really,” your pretty eyes meet his. “Is it gonna fit in my mouth?”
Holy fucking shit.
He was thinking you were just going to give him a handjob and now you’re asking if he can fit in your mouth.
Megumi runs a hand through his hair, “fuck you drive me crazy.”
“I-I thought you wanted me to–”
“Baby. You can do whatever you want to me.”
Your eyes blow wide and you just about sparkle with anticipation, “then… can I suck your dick?”
Someone kill him and put him to rest because you’re about to be the death of him.
“Fuck yeah you can, baby.”
Megumi has to help you pull his cock from his boxers and your eyes just about bulge out of your head at the size of him. He’s long and thick and the tip is a pretty pink colour. It’s heavy too, almost too heavy to hold itself up.
He sits down on the bed and you get on your knees in front of him. He strips his hoodie off, his abs flexing as he leans back on his elbows, just watching you.
You bite your lip, suddenly intimidated.
“S’okay… just take it slow.”
You nod your head before your hand wraps around the base. Megumi suddenly groans and you pull away with a fright, “s-sorry!”
“No, no, baby–” he chuckles breathily. “Js’ a lot to take in having a pretty girl with her hands on my cock.”
You look away shyly and Megumi laughs, reaching out to cup your jaw, forcing you to look back at him. He sits up, leaning down to kiss your lips softly. You taste the remains of your orgasm on his tongue, pressing your thighs together as you feel yourself become a little aroused again.
He kisses you deeper, reaching his free hand out to cup your own, guiding you toward his hard neglected cock. “You can touch me, baby.”
Your hand wraps around the base and you squeeze softly, earning a groan from your pretty roommate. He guides your hand up and down and it’s painfully fucking slow but he’s just happy to have your hands on him.
“Atta girl,” he murmurs. “Doin’ so good.”
You beam at the praise, pressing your thumb against the leaky slit of his pretty cock head. Megumi groans, leaning back on his elbows and tipping his head back. You continue the motion, eyes gleaming with pride and innocence as you just watch him fuck your hand.
His hips jerk up, his cock pulsing in your hand.
You suddenly feel the urge to press your lips to his tip and when you do, Megumi nearly cums like a fucking teenager.
“F-Fuck,” he grunts, his hand unintentionally pulling your hair, forcing out a pretty moan from your lips.
You take the tip in your mouth, your tongue flattening against the head. You wonder if you’re doing it right but the way Megumi groans and his hand pushes your head further down his length, you think you’re doing a pretty good job.
“Such a good girl,” Megumi sighs, “feels s’good.”
You moan at the praise, taking a little more of his length down your throat. Your hands are squeezing his thighs, nails scraping against the taut skin and Megumi is doing everything in his power to not fuck his cock down your throat.
You start to drool, saliva slipping down your chin and coating his pretty cock. You suddenly gag on his cock, the tip hitting the back of your throat.
“F-Fuck,” Megumi feels his cock twitch at the cute fucking sounds you’re making. Your eyes are glassy, and you’ve got drool dripping down your chin and your cheeks are flushed so pretty. “You’re gonna make me cum, baby.”
You pump the base of his cock, your tongue clumsily swirling around his tip, eyes glued to him as you watch for his reactions. Megumi suddenly sucks in a breath and pulls your mouth off his tip with a quiet pop! quickly pumping his cock.
Hot ropes of sticky cum spill across your lips and face, Megumi tipping his head back with a deep groan, squeezing the base of his cock as it twitches and jumps.
“Fuck– you sure you’ve never sucked dick before– Oh, fuck.”
Megumi’s eyes dilate at the sight of his cum painting your pretty little face, your fingers swiping at the ropes of cum before you push them into your mouth, tasting him.
“I do good?”
Megumi laughs breathlessly, “you did so good, baby girl.”
Megumi is quick to clean you up, using an old shirt to wipe the cum off your face while you sit there all pretty on your knees in front of him. He presses kisses to your face and your hair before pulling you into bed beside him, his fingertips tracing over your shoulder as you lay your head on his chest.
“You mean what you said?”
“Hm?”
“You like me?” You ask sweetly, resting your chin on his chest to look up at him.
Megumi sits up a bit, “I like-like you.”
“Wow. That’s a big call, Fushiguro.”
Megumi chuckles, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “remember it’s Megumi.”
“Gumi?”
“I like that too.”
“Mm, Megs?”
“Don’t push it.”
You giggle softly, curling into his side with a wide smile.
Megumi takes you to work and campus every day after that night, his hand always in yours when he walks you to class and he likes to pretend it annoys him how you wrap your hand around his arm and how you squeal his name when you see him after class.
When in reality, Megumi couldn’t be happier. In a twisted way, he’s glad you asked him if he hated you, because he was able to summon the courage to tell you the truth.
That he didn’t hate you. Not even a little.
author's note: the way i been pulling all nighters for DAYS. i was about to kill these two I TELL YOU JUST MAKE OUT PLS I CANT–
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god that was an awful shift i hate how corporate let us hire more people and then as soon as we put them on the schedule they decided having one more minimum wage server per day (for first shift only!!!) was too much for The Budget. i had to bargain to get someone else to come in today and help me out and it was STILL hell.. rant incoming in the tags
#we're back to 2 ppl on first shift but the new guy cant actually handle floor or dishes on his own so it's basically 1 person#plus someone following behind them to help a bit#apparently they used to have disabled workers as 'interns' just gettimg unpaid experience which is awful but at least#it meant they could actually schedule 2 other people. but i guess they got shit for not paying disabled workers#which i get. but since this new guy makes minimum wage too it means they wont let us schedule another person for first shift#which we desperately need when it's just like. me and him. in an ideal world he would be paid and getting work experience and there would#still be enough people to do the job fully#also all morning i was so scared the safety inspector would pop in bc i was told he would be. so i double checked all the possible hazards#before we opened and he literally stepped into the dining room. took a picture of it on a digital camera. then left#he didnt even come in the kitchen!! christ#but i was still stressed after that and all through lunch bc now residents' families can come in and eat like they used to before covid#and we had 2 of them today and if we fuck it up for them they can complain to corporate and im not used to running a real restaurant!!#we have to act like it's a real restaurant even tho we arent given the same resources or allowances and it's so frustrating#tbh today wouldve been 10 times easier with any other cook bc we had the fucking worst one here today. she gets frustrated when anyone asks#her for anything and she goes on rants about how bad all the other cooks are and she puts WAY too much strain on the dishwasher#using unnecessary dishes and making them wash things she could just rinse herself in the back. AND she's always telling me how to do by job#my job#and what i should do differently! it's distracting!! and makes everything harder bc she will fr just make up rules and treat u like shit if#u ignore her and do it the easier or better way#her home life sucks and she takes it out on all of us all the time. get a divorce and move to the city like you really want#it'll make everyone so much happier#(including you)#i need a new job so bad i get paid nothing to do like 4 jobs at once and im always on a time crunch and it's been absolutely killing my bac#and shoulders and feet#and joie de vivre lmao#if i get a new reliable car soon i could probably make more driving for fucking grubhub#i didnt even eat at work today. almost 8 hours straight of running my ass around the kitchen in my Shoes For Crews black sneakers#and i ate literally One piece of french toast at the very beginning#plus i came in already sick of everything bc the stupid parking garage app i have to use now malfunctioned and wouldnt let me out#bc it didnt have my entrance to the garage last night logged for some reason
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