#<- like grades n shit
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Huh. If my life was a quote, it'd be "one of those sad ones with a deceptively happy tune"
#quote from MLP:FIW#sorryyyy been kinda angry about my step family all day#sorry but im so tired of my Stepmom acting like she raised decent kids#my step brother is like 25 and living in my dads home. hes unironically an andrew tate fan and treats his very disabled girlfriend like shit#step sister always got compred to my sister who's the same age and put step sis in the light every time EVEN THO MY SIS WAS LITERALLY BETTER#<- like grades n shit#also both step sibs are gross. never cleans up ever. step brother and his gf are banned from the basement#step bro went to juvy when he was 16 and step sis had a trial last year and almost went to jail#also step sis has mono and would rather die than cover her mouth#i feel bad for SB's girlfriend because she has no other support system and sometimes it feels like SB or SS is trying to kill her?????#my dad threatened to kick out the adults if the house is dirty (adults being SB. SBG. SS. My sister. Aunt.)#My sister does SO MUCH HOUSEWORK and nobody cares and im mad#also bullshit rules recently have made my potential eating disorder worse#i don't think its healthy to rather starve than wash a dish but i actually have cried several times over this#not to mention how much i accidentally starve myself#also our food has been less and less because I don't know what I'm allowed to eat anymore because of my step family#also i have to share the smallest room with my sister. its okay tho ilh and i wouldn't want to get rid of her#sometimes it feels like my stepmom doesn't like me or my sisters because we're “weird”. childish interests and artistic#she lectured me about having missing assignments and I started crying#i said i just forgot to turn in some before the deadline and she called me lazy#<- Oops! so close. its actually THE MENTAL ILLNESS#my sisters and i feel like shit#i feel like my safe space is with my oldest sister.#and you all too! i love you guys#i just feel trapped. trapped by my step family. trapped by my own mind.#i was just starting to feel free from the burden of school and she just made me feel more stressed.#i didn't want to study because she killed the little motivation I had#Spanish exam is now “Fuck it we ball”#sorry for the personal post
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i can’t wait for the day the liar, liar fic gets so big and i can say i’ve been here SINCE THE LEVI FIC YOU STARTED because your fics are genuinely unlike any other fic i’ve ever read before.
you have me falling in love with even the OC’S, i usually hate oc’s. i can’t really name many fics off the top of my head that i actually liked reading bc as you said in your ‘about me’, i too have a particular way i imagine characters so when i read fics and see them completely different or acting (in my view) ‘cringe’, i immediately get off it. you’ll notice my reblogs are only your posts because i never reblog anything unless it is PERFECT, and my standards are HIGHH so the fact that you’ve managed to get me to reblog your posts is crazy to me. i love you and ur writing sm.
i’m WAITING for the day ‘liar, liar’ gets as big as say ‘7 minutes in heaven’ for example, (the chokehold that fic had on the aot fandom was CRAZY). and not to be… idk, rude(?), but i think your fic is WAYYYY better (and the plot hasn’t even STARTED yet). i’m gonna need people making tiktoks about ‘liar, liar’ STAT so i can have people to talk to about this other than my friend 😭
liar, liar masterlist here:
girl i've BEEN knowing u since the levi fic, which i believe began in august of 2022, so we've known each other for a good two years now, is that not WILD?? (that, and the fact that since august 2022, i've only released 7 chapters of soano, oops-)
'ur fics are genuinely unlike any other fic i've ever read before' -- wishing i was typing this on my phone instead of my laptop rn cuz i can't spam emojis expressing how flattered i feel with this section right here :(((( i'm so pleased u like my works (plural, 'cause despite ur username, and past username, being dedicated to levi and eren, you're out here supporting my jjk megumi fic too).
HELP I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD READ MY 'ABOUT ME' POST LMAOO. it was just put up there 'cause i needed to get that done and after putting it off for so long, i finally made it lolll. i stalk ur page every once in a while, so i'm well aware of your reposts being just my fics, and not to be big-headed about it, but i'd get so internally cocky just seeing that HAHAHA.
BUT, i was silent about it till now (YOU mentioned it first, nawt me, so i can happily respond this way without being seen as arrogant -- huzzah!). and idk how else to show i appreciate ur support and comments SM (that's including ur blazes which, ik i've spammed ur dm's already but seriously, i can't thank you enough for, it's like another function of tipping which is super SUPER cool of u).
'i’m waiting for the day liar, liar gets as big as say 7 mins' -- aww STOPPPP. i'd love for my stories to have a hold over the jjk fandom, but idk, if we're being real, i feel like the gojo (unreleased) story i have planned will reach more ppl seeing as it features THE satoru gojo (my princess who also happens to be THE princess of anime). but liar liar seems to be growing every day (thanks to YOUR blazes, which again, u really don't have to do ml). if it does ever reach a wider audience, i'll remember you for sure. i'll remember a handful others who are og's too, but you were my first EVER reader ALTOGETHER and i PROMISE you i won't forget that <3
#this was such a nice message#i had such a shit day today#like not the WORST day but i was studying for long hours and just NOTHING was going in my brain?#it was so irritating so i kinda just packed my shit up and logged onto tumblr for some sort of therapy#and it worked#found this sitting in my inbox just waiting to be responded to#really made me feel better#if my grades go to shit#i could always just slouch off at home and write liar liar chapters for a living LMFAO#at least then the story can actually get moving#we're reaching the one year anniversary for it as well#erenismybbg is MY bbg#MINE#blazed my story about 3 or 4 times#and that is EXPENSIVE#i'd be happy with several long comments or a £1 tip even#THE $9.99 BLAZES THO? GIRL STOP#but i love her sm#i love my og's#kiss kiss smooch smooch all over her face and forehead and hands and knees#kissing the ground she walks on#megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro x reader#fushiguro megumi x reader#megumi x y/n#megumi x you#megumi fushiguro x y/n#megumi fushiguro x you#fushiguro megumi x you#little megumi x you
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academic failure is the only reason i’d ever cry over a failure
#like no i have never(nor am i planning on doing so anytime soon) over a failed situation#nicky shit talks#my grades n future matter more to me than some dumbass teenage boy who doesn’t even know the difference between they’re#between they’re their and#there#like please
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#whoa urge to drop out again. hi fellow STEM majors#should I make Astronomy a minor again 😐#I look n feel like shit it’s crazy and I can’t see my grade until he’s done grading#and and and#maybe I should take a step back and lock in (some more)#but I’m already losing a lot of sleep and I’m not eating and 😭😭#AND MY WIFIIIIIIII HASNT COME BACK AND MY PWOER IS STILL IN AND OUT#RAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH#about to start taking comms so I can pick up the drinking habit again#………..lowk serious.
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MY PROFESSOR GAVE ME A NINETY ON MY EPIC ESSAY
#alli says shit#a 90 is not. my favorite grade. but after getting an 83 on my last essay n being emotionally shattered a 90 is great for me#n since i turned it in early he gave me a chance to turn it in early#he also said he enjoyed how i interact with scholarship n not lose my sense of voice#which i’m like. i’ll take that compliment gladly#i am loaded down with projects (like literally reading this to avoid working on my final project for his other class)#but i want to take him up on his offer. bc i care abt this essay lmao#also don’t ask me why the gif formatted like that. idk why it’s so narrow
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ok i hate that every year it's getting harder and harder to find books in the public domain (in rus spaces ofc). like what the fuck there are so many paid e-book services now. now you have to borrow e-books from the LIBRARY. insane. this is rus. this isn't how it's supposed to be. i hope all these companies will go bankrupt
#“the end of the introductory fragment you can purchase the full version in the ---” i'll fucking kill you#its like. i was readin one book in summer like yk on the internet and in september it was deleted like ok no problem i took it in the libra#but i needed to find some parts from it after i already returned the book but this shit got deleted. i dont fuckin knooooowwwwwwww fr#& like wdym i cant read some classic ass soviet play written in the 1970s for free. what the fuck.#like ok it was there back when i was in 9th grade but it was super rare n before it u could literally find any book for free but now like??#pay for this fuck fr no i have no money for it!! i dont want to pay for e book like stfu!!!!!!#& like u cant find everything in the libraries#or like ok theres a book u need cool! but the libr. is out of city (but its considered being a neighbourhood of the city) &u literally need#to go there by the train. r u kidding me.#i miss the old internet
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I know this isn't strictly christian, but it's so funny imagining that Jesus H. Christ is just so personally offended if I say "fart" that we had to make new christian-friendly phrases to talk about ripping ass
#see also: calling coochies 'pocketbooks' and shit like that#they really had my ass saying 'popped a cap' like that isn't significantly worse#also 'passed gas' and 'pooted'#pooted was for older children though#Me missing my front four teeth and also in the first grade trying to say a complex sentence in place of fart: 🫨#my hyperreligious aunt is the one that insisted we said 'popped a cap'#she's the one that didn't let me listen to non-gospel music around her#idk if it's funnier if she knows what popped a cap actually means or if she doesn't#n e ways I hope y'all have been enjoying my random rambles lately#ex christian#religious trauma
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W. Why did they hire a white teacher to an african american studies clas? [Altough maybe if she, y'know, actually studied the topic it wouldn't be so bad]
Even better question, why whould someone NOT KNOW what INTERSECTIONALITY IS in SOCIAL STUDIES CLASS??? HOW THE FUCK DID THEY EVEN ENROLL INTO IT?!? huH??????
lol she was nice but she got on my NERVES sometimes lol. white queer swiftie thats all im gonna say.
theres some things you lose when you have a white teacher teaching anyyyy kind of social studies class. the teacher cant speak from their experiences of being black, and sometimes it fuckin feels like the student's gotta enlighten them on topics that they're barely having the words to piece together (BECAUSE THEY'RE A KID).
like i knew what intersectionality was from a super young age. i knew there would be special challenges i would face because i was a black girl but i didnt know the term for it nor was i taught that was a Thing until i was in high school. i was like a 9th grader and i was like ohhh yeah yep. but for some people this was just a new thing they had to learn for a grade n that's it. toss the word right out their brain after they take a test bc it's not gonna be something they think about out side of school.
i fuckin hate public school.
#d talks#ask#this one social studies experience rlly stuck w me. i was in 9 or 10 grade and we were watching a pretty graphicly explained holocaust vide#in class. when the class was over everyone left however highschoolers do talking w friends running to their next class etc BUT#there was a jewish girl that was heavily sobbing at the table i was at. and i was like holy shit do u need anything but i couldnt stay too#long cause i had another class to go to. and the teacher came up to her and was like that was rough huh. DUDE WHAT THE FUCK. NO SHIT IT WAS#ROUGH. and i was just extreemly fucking. GUH i dont have the words to describe what i was feeling. it just wasnt fair. privledge n shit.
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wowgh.... my first free day in weeks tomorrow.....
#i have finished school.....#graduation ceremony is in a few days....#ill have like..................Actual free time again...#thats Wild#i legit was doing school shit from pretty much the moment i woke up till almost the moment id go to sleep for like#3 weeks?#more?#idk#wild shit#i gotta like.... think about Job shit soon...#but for now....................... i will just enjoy having some time to myself...#might try n do some ask blogging again soon :')c#rambles#was like actually sure id fail for a good while there... cus of how much my hand was limiting what i could do#which made me have to change my project super last minute to something more realistic#but i was pretty much starting from scratch.....😭😭😭😭#whihc.... may not have actually been all that realistic lmao#(hence the 3 week non stop working#ok no i checked n its been like probably 5 or 6 weeks damn ok)#but i lived so 🎉🎉🎉🎉#and got a good grade :')
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warning: olivia goes nuts !!!
today i learned: two of my bestest friends that i’ve known since kindergarten mildly dislike me and have been purposefully excluding me for months !!!! and apparently they didn’t enjoy going to my birthday party last year and they don’t like hanging out with me :) and that’s why we don’t hang out as a group anymore outside of school and that’s why i’m not invited to hang out with them when they go do fun stuff !! how nice !!
i was just talking to a diff friend (who doesn’t like either of those girls) and she goes “yeah, i know, i felt so bad when i saw how disinterested they were at ur birthday party.” and my immediate reaction was “wait… what ???” bc i rlly thought they enjoyed being there. i really thought they enjoyed being friends with me. why am i so dumb ?? why did i ever think things would get better ?? when did things change ??
#sounds stupid and ridiculous but bday parties are super important to me#every year i have a little sleepover party with my closest friends bc they’re literally the only friends i have#and i thought everything was going okay again#and for some reason i was stupid enough to believe that maybe i was quote on quote cool enough to hang out with them#and they constantly ditch me to go hang out w their guy friends n stuff#and like#that’s not an issue but i really wish that ppl would actually enjoy spending time w me#yknow ????#this shit happened in grade six and it’s happening again now#and we graduate next year#and i most likely won’t see them ever again/ for a rlly long time#i don’t want to end things like this#why can’t we all just go back in time and be 12 again#liv’s thoughts
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Do any of y'all have adhd and bipolar or know of any good accounts of what having both is like? I've noticed that I've been having some seriously abnormal moods recently, and the more I look into it, the more I think that it looks a lot like bipolar, but I'm not sure how it would interact with my adhd, or even if there's anything other than my adhd going on at all. Feel free to DM me if you don't want to talk about it publicly
#personal#adhd#bipolar#(?)#as an example of the mood swings: last night i worked on a project that isnt for a grade from 6pm to 1am with a 20 minute dinner at 9#and now im 10 minutes into my first class of the day. and im sitting on my bed in my robe not even dressed from the shower#(yes the class is in-person)#and i know i need to get up and move but its just not happening#and this isnt super weird for me w the adhd but ive been having really long stretches of unsteerable hyperfocus for a few days#when normally being medicated means i can control the general direction of the hyperfocus#and since monday ive felt like i need less sleep and have been even more nocturnal than usual which i think is making mornings harder#and ive been feeling like im on top of the world#like being late to class doesn't matter and i can spend my time doing what i want to even if i have other shit to do.#ive been super late to classes recently bc of executive dysfunction in the morning#and hyperfocus in between classes.#idk it feels like im losing it a bit and im really frustrated by my dumbass brain rn.#n e way. that was a long ass rant. pls lmk if youve got any experience w this or any resources that talk ab it. thx!❤️
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I've known about this no powers Dakota au for like two hours tops but i already love it. i’d love to hear more about it if you’d like to share but otherwise ill just be on the look out
IM SO GLAD i really like makiong aus and stuff and hearing that other people enjoy them makes me really happy and youve got me thinking about it now i might draw more for it who knows i might write something for it who knows aaaaaaa
#civilian dakota au#it gets a tag now#im gonna add it to the other posts#i keep thinking about defenders hq#and how emptier it woould feel without dakota#like. pov youre william and vyncent just reached the end of his social battery#and summers actually doing homework and care about ehr grades n shit (like wtf smh)#who are you gonna get up to shennanigans with?#whos gonna motivate you to push past your limits ??#whos gonna foil your narrative???#i think he would end up picking up and insane amount of hobbies without dakota's chaos#homoerotic math can only get you so far#guy who has nothing to do so he picks up more shifts at rustys#runs into the most energetic bundle of morals youve ever met#oh this is what ive been missing . jpeg
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listen ik this is a “you’re thinkin too hard abt it” moment but. camp half blood is generally for like middle schoolers n high schoolers, and there are some full time campers but a lot of them are just there for the summer
so what kind of support system in place was there for them taking care of a seven yo old annabeth chase like i’m not saying it’s completely infeasible but i’m like. who is taking care of this girl. who is teaching her her multiplication tables. chiron? the older kids in the athena cabin? luke? wine uncle mr. d??
i’m just saying i have questions
#alli says shit#i’m not trying to cinemasins but i am confusion#i assume it’s chiron who was. the dad who stepped up on his lil hooves#they probably do have some educational thing set up for the full time campers#n annabeth as a kid of athena was like. yeah sure ill sit in on the 8th grade class#no wait actually the idea of older demigods coming back to teach at camp half blood…#sorta like. teachers who come back to their old hometown to teach#now we’re just in fun lil headcanon territory lol
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"higher education" is so fucking snobby dude... my distaste for academia and the educational system as a whole is just further amplified
#relic.txt#how are you going to make fun of a student while they present their thesis... to their face?#even if you dislike the student. and think their presentation is shit.#it's just unprofessional and petty#it didn't happen to me but it happened to a classmate and i just got pissed off#the entire comittee made fun of her for the whole duration of her presentation bc it wasn't the greatest thing ever but like#she was working full time for over a year obviously her grades n shit were gonna suffer lol#some people can't exactly afford school#i've never liked school and never will. it's a joke. you don't learn jack shit other than “your worth is only your academic success” which#barely means anything#can barely find jobs after finishing school too#and teachers in my experience have always been snobby assholes#who got bullied growing up and now take it out on students#learn as much as you can ALONE. do research ALONE. develop skills ALONE.#and also. don't feel like you're worthless because you “didn't have the brains to do something sciency” or w/e bullshit#and ended up doing manual work or whatever#that's amazing#everyone's good at their own specific thing#delete later#i'm just so done with school as a whole lol
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im kinda jealous of how involved american colleges are. like your professors actually take a personal interest in you? my tutors all barely remember peoples names and most of them don’t even try. you have mandatory classes? i went to 1 class out of 13 for one of my units this semester because i couldn’t make myself go. you are failing or need extra credits? the professor can choose to give you some. maybe it’s just my uni but they do NOT give extra credit no matter what. we don’t even get supplementary assessments so if you do badly you’re just fucked. extensions go through the uni itself and not the teaching staff. you have multiple classes per subject a week? ok maybe not all colleges but i feel like if i had more than one to go to i would show up more and would also get to actually know the people in my degree. i am four years into this and i have like. 2 friends who study law and we aren’t even in the same stage of the degree. one of my old unit coordinators was american and she had such a culture shock coming to my uni because of how detached it is. she tried to structure the unit in a way that encouraged students to actually show up to class and get to know people in the classes and she had to change it because it went against uni policy.
#im obviously stereotyping american colleges#but i think the one thing that gets me is that it seems pretty common for american professors to be able to actually help struggling#students#like you can speak to unit coordinators at my uni obviously#but they can only give you advice they can’t actually do anything tangible to help#i think it’s also a My Uni thing#my brothers uni is way more involved#and like i know it’s not always a good thing like it’s a lot harder for people to have jobs when uni is so demanding#but my uni barely has classes we don’t have in person lectures there’s no connection between teaching staff and students#there’s no supplementary assessments (which my brothers uni has and im so jealous)#im graduating at least a semester late now because i had to drop classes before i failed them#and if i had supplementary assessment i might have been able to salvage my grade#ALSO before anyone gets mad at me like i said im stereotyping i know all colleges aren’t like the movies n shit#but all the americans i’ve spoken to who have done college in america seem really shocked with my uni experience#part of me wants to switch unis but at this point im kinda committed and i dont want to have to#worry about credit transfers and repeating classes#and i dont think the other main uni has the same type of double degree im doing anyway#don’t take this too seriously it’s just a vent post
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Modern grad school is the domain of psychos and maniacs im sick of everyone having Drive and Memory and being able to Devise Experiments while im over here like "You formatted your class Canvas like shit so I'm plotting your murder".
#my stuff#unironically my own PI is teaching a class and she high key made me take it#and the canvas is an abomination of unorganized due dates for the stupidest assignments upon this earth#1 fucking credit S/N grading too#like um. why couldn't you just let me audit this. why do i have to do things.#we have to do Group Presentations of powerpoints based on the research of One of the members#stupidest thing ive ever heard#and all this shit happening while i'm already bracing for the tsunami of exams for my Real Classes. and being asked to write a fellowship#i want to be the Outside Of Time for like 3 months#i don't want to do things.#i want to start submitting job apps to be a barista for 60.000 dollars a year
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