#and if i’m 4 hours away from work when that comes in . yknow

[charming2alarming]

real fucking torn between working as much as physically possible during my summer break (which is like 2 weeks long. since i did summer semester. maybe less) as to make hella money and have hella money for a trip, and instead going to a friend’s for like half that time to Fucking Relax…

like okay on one end: make money, have fun on trip, have money for trip, relax because have money (i get real fuckin panicky about money), i don’t have to ask for those days off and risk making my coworkers be weird at me

on the other end: god i could use a fucking break away from work and my dorm………… and i’ll probably be fine on money anyway i think….

[sugar-omi]

I hate myself for thinking this but, what if MC finds out she’s pregnant and the first thing in her mind is that she’s fucking up Cove’s future. So instead of telling him she just breaks up with him and shuts herself away from him so he can’t convince her that they’ll work it out. Now Cove has no clue why the love of his life just broke his poor heart. Skip to five years later, Cove comes back to surprise visit his dad but surprise there’s MC, Cliff and a little five year old boy that looks way too much like Cove. Like I’m talking copy and paste that’s a little Cove

oh my fucking god.... i. pls i have some thoughts but also OUCH. BIG OUCH

mmm i'm not gonna make a full fic/detailed post... maybe later if we're all itching for some angst or i'm up for causing more heart ache n then i am very much open to expanding on this (already thinking abt cove getting to know his son.... omfg my heart HURTS)

but i wonder how MC "gets away" (for lack 'a better words) with not telling cove about the kid.

because i can tell you right now, cliff and kyra can't know about it and keep it a secret. not for 5 years at least.

so does she beg everyone in her family to keep it a secret? i think that's the best bet. moms would really prefer Not to keep it a secret, but they also can't force you to tell cove...

but i also don't see them letting 5 years without cove at least knowing, go by either... they'd try to keep the secret, but seeing cove's sad face would break them quickly, if not instantly.

also your friends!!! god, they can not keep a secrete to save their life, especially that big. so you can tell them, but expect the news to find its way back to cove in about.. mmm... 4 hours? so yeah....

anyway!!! lets say that your family kept the secret...

i think your son would eventually start asking about his dad. he sees how you and your family react to him, hears all the mumbling about how he looks so much like... "cove"? when you think he's in the other room.

and he sees how sometimes you look sad and how you slowly and tenderly run your fingers through his hair. and how sometimes you tell him "yknow, daddy has hair just like yours."

and when he asks why you're sad, if you respond with something along the lines of "you look just like your dad, thats all."

or even if you say that in response when he asks what his dad looks like (if you haven't shown him pictures), or if he overhears you saying he looks like this "cove" guy

you notice he starts looking at himself more often... maybe even asking, "does daddy have green hair like mine?" "are his eyes really blue, just like mine?" "does he wear glasses too?" and still in awe that he and this man he's never met, but already seems to adore him (as much as a toddler can adore someone they don't know), share the same features.

and if you show him pictures of cove, which i hope you do, but if you don't, don't worry because your son will probably realize "he has green hair like me!!!!" and he'd either run up to enthuse about it or run up to ask him if he's his daddy bc they have the same hair color... or just call him daddy n if anyone tries to argue about it, wdym?! they have the same hair color, what more do you need?!

so hopefully, cove is the only man with specifically seafoam green hair. otherwise, you're shitting yourself every time your son runs off to meet his green-haired-brethern

anyway. I think all your sons questions, and seeing pictures, knowing that he shares so many traits with cove, and seeing you miss him.

oh god, seeing you sad would make him insist so so much on seeing cove.

"if we meet daddy, will you be happy again?"

also can't believe I almost forgot.. your son being sad about not having a dad, and being jealous of other kids for spending time with their dad, etc.

he'd ask you questions about why he doesn't have a dad, n if he does. why isn't he around? and a real heartbreaker.. does daddy hate him? does he not love him? is that why he isn't here?

so I guess that means it's time to go back to sunset bird! and finally explain why you moved away n never looked back, and why you don't talk to anyone but your parents from back then...

now I won't get into everything right now (im a fuckin liar. I can feel a tangent coming on)

but I wanna talk abt how cove would feel, just a bit, and how I think your future with him would look...

I think at first, he'd be really shocked, seeing this carbon copy of his much younger self. the only thing telling him that his 4-5 year old self didn't jump out of one of his many childhood pictures,

is any birthmarks or beauty marks that maybe you have, or the boys hair being curlier than his, or his skin tone, or maybe he has your nose. whatever it is, he knows he's looking at the imperfect combination of you and him.

(cove's heart is beating outta his chest right now, n you're lucky he only stumbles instead of fainting, because this really is a shock... but that deeper part inside of him, that egotistical, primal almost, part of his heart swells up at the thought, the reality. that his son looks mostly, if not entirely like him.)

but after shock, he's sad. I think he'd be really sad, because he realizes that this is why you broke up right? and no matter how in control of your emotions you think you may be, your wide eyes show how afraid, nervous, and sad you are. he knows. he knows without even talking to you and it hurts

and after he gets past the anger and confusion stage, maybe even in between in fact- which would be more natural since, I think he'd feel this all at once but that's besides the point

he'd be really sad he missed all his sons milestones. walking, first words... God he probably dreams about it (when he does eventually fall asleep), and now his heart is tugging at the seams and the seams are RIPPING.

he also starts thinking about how hard it must've been doing it by yourself. and going through all that without him, your partner.

but maybe you didn't rely on him like he relied on you? maybe you didn't trust him like he did you, maybe you just... didn't need him. like he needed you.

you did break up afterall, and you never let him know about the kid until now, so maybe you thought he'd be a failure of a father and nipped it in the bud before disaster struck...

but I also think that's where anger comes in. because you didn't tell him. he didn't have a choice at all.

he knows he had a tendency to hesitate or run away, but he thinks really hard about it, and he knows he wouldn't have ran away from this.

leaving you alone would scare him a lot more than being a father. being a bad or absent father would scare him a lot more than trying to be a good one. knowingly abandoning a life he helped create, would scare him so much more. he wouldn't be able to sleep otherwise.

so while he gets it. he doesn't get why you didn't try.

and if you explain that you worried about ruining his future, he's so upset and so mad because how could you make that choice for him? how could you take on the burden alone?

this is also where confusion merges in, because while the answers are so obvious or easy to guess, he just can't believe it. he doesn't wanna believe it...

now about your future...

cove still loves you. he's loved you his whole life, it's hard to stop even 5 years later... and seeing you, it makes his heart throb because he's dreamed about this for many nights.

you broke up with him without giving any answers. you even up and moved by the end of the week so when he tried to give you space, before talking to you, it was too late. your room was pretty much void of every sign of life.

you took all your treasured items, your clothes- spare some youd been meaning to get rid of, your pictures, your hobby items. everything. he's surprised you didn't just take the bed and frame.

he's surprised you didn't just carve out his heart n take it with you, because if it's still in his chest, why does it feel so hollow?...

it'd take a really long time to even think of a romantic relationship. if at all. maybe cove's even accepted the break up at some point, depending on how long you'd been together. but if you'd been together since you were 13, it's a hard pill to swallow. bc you can put up with his angsty teenage self, what changed...?

I think seeing you be a parent, and so adored by your son, warms up his heart. makes him fall in love a bit at the sight.

it's not instant, he's getting to know you again. and getting to know this life that he didn't even know was waiting for him.

it's a good 2 or 3 years of figuring out this mess until it becomes something that makes sense. or as much sense as it can make. and if there's still something there, no matter how miniscule. it will catch fire.

now about the kiddo... he's so scared. and I hope you took a few days of talking with cove, and prbly cliff n Kyra bc they have a lotta feelings n thoughts on this too, before you try to integrate cove into his life.

it's small. cove meeting you at the park, and either your son is asking cove a billion questions (both abt why the sky is blue, and awkward questions abt why he wasn't present before...)

or he's trying to drag him on the monkey bars (doesn't work, cove's feet are on the ground still....)

or he's sitting silently on the blanket, reading, occasionally showing cove his favorite scene of the picture book or making him pronounce a word

but it does get bigger, it becomes lunch-n-movie dates, spending the night at your house (at your son's insistence. prbly bc he didn't want him to leave after a fun day), then cove taking him out alone..

it's a lot. and sometimes it feels like you're going backwards or that you're not moving at all because it's hard, for awhile. and even though his dad is on speed dial, there's not enough information he can give cove in how to take care of and deal with a kid he just met a few months ago.

especially a kid who already has a bit of personality, is hell on wheels (like most 5 year olds), possibly has many questions n sometimes problems with cove suddenly being here... it's a lot. n cliff can't help with any of it really.

he does get comfortable, eventually. although there's still times when he's sad, sometimes even angry about what happened, and all he's missed out on, he's so so happy to not miss out on anything else.

[shhtickerbook]

Iced Chocolate

chapter four

very quick messy sketch heh. chapter 4 is up under the cut and AO3 c:

chapter one

chapter two

chapter three

Noodle had been up at dawn as usual. Unlike the other staff of the washhouse who got to have an extra hour of rest before beginning a shift, she had to be up just before sunrise to start deliveries of the previous day’s laundry. Whilst they had been able to slip away unnoticed during the day, Noodle still had to upkeep her morning deliveries regardless. Unless they somehow managed to train Tiddles to go out make deliveries himself.

After drudging through the show with the now empty cart, she tiredly dragged it behind her and through the doors into the washhouse. Noodle was surprised to see only Larry and Lottie at work, her other three friends visibly missing. Lottie smiled kindly at her arrival, holding up a steaming mug.

“Noodle! I made your usual for you.”

She presented the mug, which was filled with a hot malt drink, perfect for coming back in from the cold. Lottie always made her a fresh cup of something hot when she returned from deliveries. Noodle warmed her hands against the mug before taking a deep swig. The girl surveyed the room again, frowning.

“Where is everybody? And how’s Willy-?”

She’d been fretting all night about him, still unable to believe just how stupid he was in the first place to walk across thin ice. Even with the assurance from Abacus the night before, she couldn’t help but worry. Lottie laid a hand on the girls shoulder reassuringly, interrupting her spiral.

“Abacus and Piper are upstairs with him, now don’t panic. But Mr Wonka is a bit poorly, the icy water must’ve shot his immune system pretty hard. He had quite a high fever.”

Lottie explained, sitting down to rest her arm over Noodle. Who seemed more concerned for her friend, draining the rest of the mug quickly before rising up. The idea of someone such as Willy Wonka being sick just seemed completely outrageous, he was just the kind of person you couldn’t imagine being frail and unwell.

“I’m gonna go see him-“

Larry looked over at Lottie, who had forgotten one important detail about the chocolatiers current state of mind. The telephonist catching up to the girl before she raced up the stairs. Noodle had been made aware of Willys headspace situation beforehand, but only really once briefly. At first she hadn’t exactly understood it, finding it a rather strange. But after a long talk with Abacus, he managed to wrap her head around the whole situation.

“Noodle wait- before you head up. Willy is feeling a little younger than usual. Yknow like how we explained?”

Noodle paused for a moment upon hearing it, but then shrugged her shoulders. Noodle hadn’t been with Willy that often when he was “small” as they said. But from the sounds of things, he was probably feeling pretty sick right now and likely needed the support.

“That’s Okay, don’t worry”

She smiled before turning on heel to ascend the staircase. Determined to check on her closest friend and brother figure.

-

With the help from Piper yet again, Willy had been successfully delivered back up to his room. The bed had been completely stripped of its soiled sheets and replaced with fresh white linen. Poking its head from underneath the sheet, sat the orange knitted beak of Chester. Willy quickly picking him up to hold close, his glass eyes pressing an imprint onto his cheek.

Although the bath certainly made him feel fresher, his head still felt as if it was stuffed with cotton wool. Standing up just made him feel woozy. When climbing back into the bed, he noticed that a towel had been tucked over the mattress tactfully. At first feeling mortified at what it’s presence clearly implied, but realistically it was probably for the best. The combination of the cool silk pyjamas and clean sheets felt heavenly when he lay back down, Abacus folding the blanket over him once settled.

“There we go lad, much more comfortable i’d say”

Willy dozily nodded, realising he was feeling much smaller now that he was tucked in. Outside the weather had become even fiercer, the blizzard building stronger. The thin glass pane of his window rattling from the wind, Abacus sighing at the poor stability of everything in this terrible excuse for accommodation. Maybe Wonka’s mad ideas of his dream store could truly happen, get them all out of this dreaded place.

Willy smacked his lips for a moment, realising how thirsty he felt. His sore throat still left that foul taste in his mouth, and he was eager to get rid of it. Although in the time it had taken for him to be delivered back up into the room, his headspace had slipped even smaller. The words he wanted to say were there, but it felt as if they were far away, too distant to try and verbalise them.

So instead he weakly pointed towards the sink in his room, grunting a little bit to get attention.

“Hm? What’s the matter?”

Abacus queried, watching in mild amusement as the boy pointed towards the basin. Willy making a grabbing motion with his hands, miming holding something. Thankfully Abacus quickly connected the dots of his request.

“Oh you’re thirsty, of course”

The man got up to fill up a glass, before offering it to the boy. Yet again similarly to the night before, Willys hold on the glass was shaky as best. Willy held it in both hands as he took a sip, but with his quivering grasp the water spilled down the sides and onto his chest. The cold water feeling very uncomfortable as he very nearly dropped it all over himself.

“Oh dear, allow me”

So once more Abacus reached out to hold the cup in place, whilst Willy eagerly gulped down the liquid. Although it didn’t taste very good, as it had quite a strong metallic aftertaste to it. The accountant couldn’t help but chuckle at his expression as he drained the glass.

“I think we’re going to have to consider some alternatives to this lad, certainly a bit too wobbly for a glass just yet”

He spoke fondly, Willy feeling a little embarrassed. He wasn’t wrong though, all his motor functions seemed to be playing against him at the moment. So he just shrugged with a mumble, lying back into the bed once satisfied. Abacus gently laid a hand to his forehead to check his temperature, which was still pretty warm. Wonka certainly seemed very quiet, Abacus noticing how he was choosing to gesture and mumble rather than speak. As he was the person whom Willy was most often regressed around, Abacus had taken many a mental note on his different mannerisms depending on just how little he was feeling.

The combination of illness seemed to slip him even younger it seemed, as this was the first time he’d gone so nonverbal.

“Still a little hot, I may nip down into town and pick up some medicine if it doesn’t come down soon.”

Willy frowned at the idea, highly doubting the idea that this medicine would taste very good. A knock then arrived at the door, Willy lifting his head up from the pillow in interest, before thumping it back down in exhaustion.

“Hey it’s just me, can I come in?”

It was Noodle, her voice sounding kind but concerned. She’s bumped into Piper on the way up, who had filled her in on how crappy he was feeling right now. On the other side of the door, Abacus turned to Willy to check on him.

“Is that alright?”

Willy thought for a moment, he knew that Noodle was aware of his headspace now. But there still was that mild anxiety, Noodle was like his little sister. He kept her safe, looked out for her. He wasn’t sure if it was okay for that role to swap over, especially when she relied on him.

But after a long conversation with Abacus and himself, she assured him that it was okay. She wanted to be there for him. So Willy gave Abacus the nod, who called out to her.

“Come on in Noodle.”

The door creaked open and Noodle stepped inside, smiling fondly when seeing Willy tucked inside the bed. It was funny how his tall lanky frame managed to look so tiny in that bed. Willy tried to sit up straight in bed, although it made his head throb again. He tucked his stuffed toucan under the sheet self consciously, poor Chester giving a silent imaginary squawk of indignity.

Even though he felt dreadfully small, there was still that anxious part of him that wanted to seem big for Noodles sake. The girl in question just scoffed at his weak attempt to seem fine when it was extremely evident he wasn’t, perching on the end of his bed with a grin.

“Willy, you don’t need to pretend. I know you’re a baby right now”

Even Abacus couldn’t hold back a chuckle at the blunt comment, before attempting to cover it up with a very fake sounding cough. Willy looked up in complete outrage, scowling at them both rather adorably.

“Nuh a baby..”

He mumbled, still struggling with his words. But Noodles comment had pulled him from his silence, who just laughed in response. Finding his face truly priceless.

“Really? Coulda fooled me.”

Willy frowned at her teasing before giving her a small smile, it was relieving that she still treated him like usual. One thing he was worried about with Noodle knowing, was if it changed the way she saw him, treated him awkwardly or acted unnaturally. But it was clear she was still the same old snarky teenager he loved.

Abacus decided to take the opportunity to get up, deciding to allow the two some quality time whilst he attempted to sneak into town to pick up some things. Not before gently stroking back Willys damp curls tenderly.

“I best head out and pick you up some medicine young man, but I trust Noodle to keep you in check. I don’t suppose that Benz may come check up soon too.”

Willy nodded, only feeling a little apprehensive. Abacus had been caring for him all morning and him leaving did make him feel a little anxious. But when Noodle reached out and squeezed his hand, he couldn’t feel any safer.

“I’m usually the one keeping him out of trouble regardless Abacus, if it weren’t for me he’d be inside a tigers belly right now- or frozen in the bottom of that lake”

She pointed out knowingly, eyebrow raised cheekily, Wonkas cheeks burning scarlet. Nearly got eaten by a tiger actually. The accountant closed the door gently behind him as he left, knowing that Noodle would keep a good eye on him. Noodle scooted further up the bed, lifting a hand to feel his forehead. Abacus wasn’t wrong, he certainly had a temperature.

“You’re such an idiot y’know, you’re lucky you got away with just a bad fever. If you weren’t careful you could’ve added to the number of skeletons at the bottom of that lake.”

She wriggled her fingers in a spooky way, Willys eyes widening in alarm. Noodle having momentarily forgotten that he was feeling younger than usual. Probably not the best time to make jokes in that manner, backtracking her statement.

“Hey but uh- you’re okay! I was just joking about the skeletons- I think. You’re just lucky you had your sis Noodle looking after ya, as always.”

The word slipped from her mouth without realising, although the pair shared an obvious sibling-like connection with eachother. Neither of them had verbalised it yet, until of course that very moment. Noodle felt her cheeks burning, panicking incase she’d overstepped. Yet Willys eyes shone like stars at the sentence, weakly reaching out to hold her hand with a small grin.

“Sister…”

He mumbled , squeezing her hand in his. Noodle met his eyes and smiled too, there was something different about him like this. Even through his obvious illness, his eyes sparkled with a childlike optimism, innocence. For the first time she really understood and saw the younger headspace he was in.

“Yeah, but more like big sister i think at the moment. Figures though, how many times have I saved your butt now?”

She chuckled, wondering what on earth would’ve happened to the poor chocolatier if she hadn’t met him. She noticed how his eyelids were beginning to flutter, the boy yawning as he rubbed his eyes sleepily. He’d only been awake a few hours but was somehow just as exhausted as when he spent all day out in town selling chocolate.

“You need some sleep.”

She firmly stated, Willy feeling too weak to argue on the matter. Noodle pulled the blanket further up his frame, finding the small knitted Toucan sprawled out and tangled in the mattress.

“Cant forget this lil guy.”

She manipulated his floppy wings up and down to mimic flight as she handed him over. Willy accepting the little bird and tucking him under his chin like always did, breathing in his faint cocoa scent. As noodle lifted the blanket to tuck it over his shoulder, he turned over before she could fold it, holding it open.

“Stay?”

He looked up with the most manipulative puppy dog eyes, mot wanting to be alone right now. Especially with how little he was feeling. Noodle chuffed in amusement, biting her lip as she considered it. She’d been up since dawn and was in-fact feeling pretty beat herself.

In defeat with a shrug and a chuckle, she began to unlace her boots. Willy managing one of his signature grins, soon enough he felt Noodle join him under the sheets in the small single bed. But somehow they managed to fit inside comfortably, Noodle linking her free hand with his once tucked underneath the sheets. Both holding onto eachother for warmth in the chilly room.

Cuddled up beside her brother, Noodle couldn’t quite remember the last time she felt so safe, as did Willy. Both pseudosiblings embracing close before they soon both fell fast asleep in each other’s hold.

[themagnificentmags]

Saving this for fun later: a month ago I read a book (Out of the Dark by David Weber) and did not like it. and then I wrote an essay about it in the group chat.

I'm gonna actually give a book ANTI-rec here because I finished it last night and I'm still thinking about it: Out of the Dark by David Weber. tl;dr the last 10% of the book wrenches the genre away from hard sci fi in a way that undercuts the first 90% of the book and comes across as a huge ass-pull

The premise: aliens (the Shongairi) are attempting to invade modern-day Earth to bring it into the fold as one of their many pre-FTL slave/"client" states

The first 90% of the book is basically a brutal beatdown of humanity. The Shongairi start off by destroying every major city and military base via orbital kinetic strikes, then move in with ground troops across the world. Since it's military sci-fi there's a lot of enthusiasm over all the cool military tech humans have (fighter jets, tanks, machine guns) and some dubious politics about US intervention in afghanistan/iran (again par for the course), but the overarching theme, over and over, is that despite any individual battles humans win, they always are losing overall -- even if the Shongairi are comically unused to fighting anything more sophisticated than crossbows and plate armor, they always control orbit and frequently use more orbital bombardment to deal with human insurrection. Again: it is brought up by basically every POV character that it is completely impossible for humans to win the war, but every human of course chooses to go down fighting. (There are a lot of sad dads with dead wives and children.)

Eventually the Shongairi decide to cut their losses and start working on how to kill all humans without getting in trouble with their bosses (they try to develop a bioweapon and are thwarted, then they decide to pull out their troops and just crack the planet with massive bombardment). However, only now, like 4 months into the invasion, 90% of the way through the book, does one of the secondary characters show up with a solution: actually, the entire time, he's been Vlad-the-Impaler Dracula, and he has magic powers that can kill entire Shongairi bases, steal their retreating ships, and capture their flagship (including "neural education" tech to train humans in galactic tech and the intended industrial base for Earth-the-client-state.

So instead of, like, a heavy and kinda depressing alien invasion novel, we get an 11th hour shift to fantasy when it was not remotely foreshadowed (yeah he's good at woodcraft/stealth, yeah he's a little weird and possessive of the POV character that interacted with him but TBH I thought he was just gay, yeah I looked it up after and it says the name he gives is one of Vlad's brothers/father/whatever) and like! Why now! Why not 4 months ago before billions more people died! Who gives a shit what the rest of the cast have been doing, them trying to survive in the unpopulated wilderness of South Carolina/Russia/Romania literally doesn't matter when fuckin Dracula could have saved the day any time! It just completely undercut the stakes of the rest of the novel.

also at the very end of the novel someone had squished a full mosquito between the pages. chefs kiss

if it had been the middle of the book turning point (or, to be fair, if it wasn't rather dry military sci fi that I was already skimming the "play with military toys" bits), I think I could have enjoyed the twist, even! like it's a cool concept! You just can't do it in hard sci fi yknow?

I think there's also a connection somewhere between the Ur-Fascism [Fascist societies rhetorically cast their enemies as "at the same time too strong and too weak".] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Definitions_of_fascism#Umberto_Eco) with how the Shongairi occupy the equal categories of hypercompetent interstellar conquerors and comedically incompetent commanders and footsoldiers, who throughout the course of the novel never even discover that humans can hear their stealth drones coming and react to counter them. They're strong when the story calls for humans to lose, and weak when the story calls for humans to win.

Ok I should get back to work but I have one more gripe. The pacing on the Dracula reveal is also fucked. The reveal, from the reader's POV, is: Romania POV character has most of the civilians he's protecting killed by Shongairi and he nearly dies. Dracula-as-human says "ok we're [me and my elite Romanian army unit] gonna Really kick their ass now" and POV army guy demands to go with them. Cut to aliens getting killed mysteriously. Cut to aliens in orbit saying "they were killed so mysteriously, go on high alert! Also they stole some tech and tortured the lead scientist alien for info". Cut to some Carolina crew filler. Cut to aliens getting killed mysteriously, this time the soon to be dead alien sees some gas, maybe it's a gas? Some speculation about illusory hologram humans being backed by other alien factions. Cut to aliens in orbit saying "fuck this, everybody leave and we'll glass the planet." Cut to aliens in orbit realizing some of the returning alien ships were highjacked, and then Dracula and Co rock up to the alien flagship, magically paralyze everyone but the commander, and save the day wooooo!!!

In a different, better book, we could have spent so much more time on like getting to know Dracula and his newly made vamps, doing prep and buildup for highjacking the ships, etc, but instead the writing is contorted to preserve the twist for the reader as long as possible. No dramatic irony, no tension on "but can they make it?", no possiblity to do character building with Dracula since preserving the twist is more important.

[catboyshinsou]

sick headcanons!

anon request: i love your writing smmm !! 🥺 can i request mha sick hcs where they take care of the reader when they don’t feel well 🥺 you choose who !! <3333

a/n: sorry it took so long <//3

pairings: Kaminari, Kirishima, Tokoyami and Monoma x sick,g/n!reader

warnings: none rlly, mention of throwing up in monoma, slight manga spoilers

can be seen platonically and romantically <3

kaminari:

Tbh i think he’d be quite Useless

Just rlly panicky n stuff bc what the fuck does one do with a sick person???

*walks into your dorm* “hey y-n wanna- WHAT THE FUCK YOU LOOK TERRIBLE”

*you in a blanket and not having enough energy to be offended* “i think i’m dying” “y/n WHAT”

He’d try his best regardless tho

He goes to sato and helps with doing something soothing and welcoming

On his way back to your dorm he passes aizawa and tells him you’re sick in THE worst way

“Oh yeah Aizawa-sensei, y/n is dying-” “THEY’RE WHAT”

Kami would definitely storm into the room with him and be just as worried

What if it was something really serious??? Like the plague?????

They find you just laying in bed, sniffling and groaning

Turns out it wasn’t the plague and just a bad flu

Flu with its whole jazz, you had a fever of 38C and you could barely move

Aizawa got you excused from classes for about a week and left again

Kami just stood there with his soup and went “oh thank god you're not dying”

like i said i think he'd be useless but try his best

he checks up on you every half hour either in person or via text during classes

he brings you stuff like blankets and foods even though you can't taste any of them or have any type of appetite

but! thanks to the fridge in your room you just had snacks for about… forever

he gave you extra attention too

sometimes he'd just sit on the ground and talk about his day and theories while you just laid under your blanket

you appreciated it though

except for aizawa, sato and tsuyu nobody came over and even they just came in every few hours

kami stayed for hours on end and even tried to convince aizawa to let him sleep over so he could “watch over you” incase you “stopped breathing”

it's not like you slept much when he was around anyway, nights were not ideal for a good rest on a sick day

it was endearing seeing him lay on a futon on the floor and poking you when he had to get up for class

he leaves notes and stuff to make sure you didn't get worried

did he do anything to make you feel better physically? not rlly

did he lift your spirits and make you feel less lonely? most definitely

kirishima:

hear me out

this boy is an angel when it comes to caring for people

when he got into the whole essentially self care stuff he also knows what's best for others

he was probably one of the first to notice you being ~off your game~

whether in class or just yknow vibing, he'd tap your shoulder and softly “you okay man?”

he calls everyone dude and man and bro no matter gender or anything he's just that into the manliness stuff

and yes he puts you in essentially self isolation more for yourself than for others

“your body needs to rest y/n! can't properly get better if everyone keeps bothering you!”

he calls you every night tho and he has aizawa bring you stuff when he checks up on you (he's allowed because he's the teacher ofc also as long you're a UA student like one of your legal guardians which is like a dad and dads can see their kids sick right?)

stuff ranges from just bowls of soup to compresses to the handmade ointment against a sore throat to like socks he knitted or something his parents sent in bc he told them you were sick

yes this boy tells his parents you're sick

i mean someone probably told yours but like twice the parents means twice the comfort!

alternatively if your parents are *cough* he'd tell his parents and put you on the phone with them because everyone needs some parental love from time to time (don't act tough about it, he's gonna make you cry and tell you how manly you are for doing so)

when you're back on your feet he probably still treats you like you're about to fall over for like two or three days more

he praises you for how well you did during your essential quarantine and when you say you didn't do anything he says some cheesy stuff about manliness

“bro i'm so proud of you for getting through it!” “i didn't do anything kiri-” “don't say that! it takes so much energy and manliness to keep in self isolation and get better, you did amazing”

tokoyami:

i love birds

also look at baby toko he's so cute

do birds get sick?

anyways

tokoyami is like.. helpful but tries to be undercover about it

he's not gonna ignore you or anything

he's the type to like silently nudge teachers into your area so they could see you were clearly sick and send you back to the dorms to rest

but he'd never actually ask you or tell anyone

it would ruin his whole ~vibe~

dark shadow tells him to tell someone and he rlly does especially if he sees you struggling through it in class but he's also just not great at talking with people so a nudge or “secret note” will have to do

it does work, you're in your dorm right before combat training because mic had sent you up and excused you

mic is sweet he said he'd send aizawa up when he finds him but that you should rest

he also tells you that you have some really attentive friends

you're at this point just letting the sickness take over you so you have no idea what he just said (you heard him but the words just didn't register in your brain)

you get into bed and the first thing you do is sleep through afternoon classes

tokoyami is only at 50% today and so is dark shadow

tokoyami swears he isn't worried, the teachers are capable of taking care of you in an appropriate manner so that you will recover in no time

dark shadow on the other hand is all gittery and doesn't wanna focus on anything but you

off topic but i just think dark shadow is tokoyamis way of showing emotions or well like… like his internal thoughts? not like his internal dialogue but ya know his feelings

so he can act all goth and dramatic but dark shadow is a good way of still giving some of his feelings an output

back to you

so training is over and so is your nap

but you wake up to pillows, stuffed animals, blankets and more pillows surrounding you

half of them weren't yours either

they laid around you like some kind of pillow fortress jusy surrounding you and making sure you didn't hit your head on the wall or fall from the bed

it kinda felt like a nest- oh

you tried getting up, your head almost immediately flinging uoh back into bed but you needed to see if a certain someone would come back in to build the nest

“dark shadow, be quiet we don't want them to w- oh you're up”

tokoyami came in with more stuffies and an extra blanket like it was a siberian winter and your rooms only source of warmth was an almost dying candle

“are those yours?” you asked half asleep, your head absolutely booming

you could barely keep your eyes open, that's how exhausted you were but you made an effort to smile at the bird and his shadow

“uh no, yaomomo-san insisted on making some blankets for you and hagakure-san, ashido-san and uraraka-san gave me all their stuffed animals when they heard i was paying you a visit-” “but the blue star blanket and teardrop pillow are from fumi!! he brought them from home because he can't sleep without them!!” “DARK SHADOW!”

you only chuckled before breaking out in a cough again

aizawa came in some time after and had a hard time finding you under all the blankets and stuffies and even offered to tell the class to stop bothering you

but you just laid there all cozy and told him to let them be

“it's how he shows affection, it's nice”

monoma:

oh so the 1A student got sick??? huh??? I thought 1A was invincible hUUUUUUH??? *manic laughter*

coughs

anyways

so basically the two hero courses are more “in tune” after the joint training

they often have dinners together and it isn't rare to see kendo come over with monoma and tetsu^4

she came over to hang with the girls and tetsu had training sessions with kiri

nobody rlly knew why monoma tagged along though

all he did was spout about how average everything is for the “superior hero course”

he did secretly like the classes growing together more though

he'd sit on the couch with you and occasionally laugh about something else other than his team beating yours during joint training

one day he came in and didn't see you at your usual spot

“ehhhh??? where's the only tolerable person in this course??”

used to his lowkey insults deku pointed you out at the dinner table, head resting on your hand and looking over some homework

“y/n what are you- oh my god you look horrible”

“thanks monoma, you're as nice as ever”

your face was drained of any colour, eyes heavy lidded and you could barely control the pen that scribbled over the paper

he tried grabbing your wrist but pulled back immediately

you were way too hot and the fact that he noticed by grabbing your wrist meant that it was more than just a high fever

“is 1A that incompetent that they couldnt even notice their classmate falling sick??? can you guys do anything but trouble???”

“shut up monoma, we tried getting them to bed but they insisted on finishing up first and there's nothing in the world that can get y/n away from what they've put their head to”, kaminari yelled from the living room space

how were you gonna get anything finished if your head was falling off your shoulders if you didn't hold it up

class 1A really was incompetent

“sato-san, give me a hand”

sato, who was currently cooking up dinner, just held out his hand and some type of chocolate bar which monoma grabbed and ate up

“this is incredibly sweet, i don't know how you do it”

it's become like half a routine for monoma to copy quirks for whatever reason

kiri and tetsu used it to determine which quirk was handier

uraraka’s quirk made cleaning up after a game night easier

it was training for all of them

monoma could train his copy and the others could measure how much they've grown from his reaction to it

anyways

sato’s quirk kicked in and he lifted you up over his shoulder

“monoma!” you could barely lift your voice, faintly kicking

before you knew it he placed you on your bed in your dorm and sighed

“you're lighter than i thought”

“i think i'm gonna throw up”

so you hurled into your garbage can

monoma held back whatever there was to hold back

(he was very much disgusted but even he knew that this wasn't the time to let any type of negative emotion show)

“jolly gees y/n, what did you have for breakfast?!”

you laid in bed as he passed you a water bottle

“you need to drink something, you lost a lot of water”

“awe caring for me, monoma?”

“this is for general health, y/n. i would never as much as care for anyone, especially not a brat from 1A. who even knew that any of you could fall sick huh?! weren't you supposed to be superior to the rest of us??!”

he said all of that while putting a blanket on you and opening the window for fresh air

“god you 1A fools really are incompetent!”

he went into your bathroom and soaked a small towel in water

“i'm only doing this so you don't infect anyone. god you could cause an epidemic at UA and in the end 1b would fall victim to you as well! this is all just for the general well-being!”

you didn't even hear what he was saying anymore

with a half empty bottle next to your head, you slept peacefully

monoma let out a deep breath when he saw you

“i'd never care for anyone in 1A, i'm better than that…”

he whispered those words to himself

(he did care)

[hcrdtimcs]

take two: jia (also @seaweedbible) again. disc + ims ok!

finally introducing SEOL YOONA, and yes i want you to read that in love4eva’s grimes’ voice. y3 social work major, 108th avenue’s unofficial landlord, iso’s publicity officer n also member of yongmaru. PHEW. 24 hours in a day n w tht laundry list of commitments? it seems none of them can be spent on herself.

PROFILE / BIOGRAPHY / PINTEREST 

tw / terminal illness, abandonment

raised by a single mom mostly ? wasn’t terrible or anything but just rlly spacey n waned to live her own life separate from the yoons n went out partying / clubbing / dating whatever. when she did remember to get a babysitter for yoona, the job usually fell to her aunt (half older sister 2 her mom)

aunt was a huuuuge role model 4 yoona tbh like ? did what she wanted n worked hard to live the life tht she wanted. was single by choice but also so fuckin happy n thriving n yoona was like. damn i wanna be her so bad 

unfortunately that One good parental figure passed due 2 a terminal illness when yoona was 13. cue the canned awww sound effects on tv.... but tbh her aunt had been sick 4 the longest time n yoona was just glad she didn’t have to go thru tht anymore.

aunt left 108th to her mother, begging for her to get her shit together n for a while it all seemed okay! mom brought yoona along and they both lived in 108th and her mom was the (unreliable) landlord, but it was something yknow ???

could’ve gone 2 a better uni but she didn’t have to pay for lodging at hansung + she had the academic advantage so 😜 good lord that emoji is fucking hideous

unfortunately halfway thru her 1st year her mom disappeared on her... now she’s starting her 3rd year and still hasn’t heard back from her. don’t ask her how she feels about it because she’s still delusional and believes this is just another disappearing act n her mom will be back soon

that was pathetic n sad PHEW anyway ... 

yes she is iso’s publicity officer! she’s not a polyglot by any means but she’s confident, watches international tv shows and has papago so what else do u rlly need right ugly winking emoji

member of yongmaru because she genuinely loves volunteering but also unfortunately ends up doing most of the work others push off on her. its ok tho bc at the end of the day it helps ppl!

her work will always be done. she may finish it 10 mins before the deadline but just let her work... if u push her she WILL not do it just to spite u

108th residents ummmmmmmmm i recommend u guys learn how to change ur lightbulb because the waiting list is LONG. if u don’t mind her coming in at 5am tho then the waiting list is shortened considerably.

she’s just working so hard rn to run away from the life she has 2 the life she wants? but all those commitments n such make her a rly flaky friend... 

i’m not putting any plots under this because this is already so gargantuan n i love brainstorming n also i’m lazy BUT lf:

friends (who are either pissed at or starting to be angry at her for being the way she is), hookups (no relationships she can barely maintain her friendships cat laughing emoji), 108th residents (lets plot it out babey)

[darker-soft-starker]

Starker High School AU Pt. 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

---

tw: general howard stark warning

---

There is a buzzing by his ear.

At first, Tony doesn’t really notice it, waking up in short increments before being pulled back under. But he keeps waking, unsure what keeps tugging him out of his dreams, hand flapping around his face as he tries to stop the incessant ringing.

“Blergh,” he mumbles into his pillow.

Batting his hand around to quell the source of annoyance, he comes to grip his phone, squinting as it lights up inches away from his face and vibrates against his palm. For a second he thinks it’s his alarm, but then he remembers that he didn’t set one. It’s a succession of text notifications cascading down his screen that alerts him out of the slope of slumber with a start.

The only time his phone goes off like this is an emergency. The first thing he registers is that it’s only eight-minutes after seven. He blinks, sight clearing from the sleep wedged in his eye as he reads the flurry of still-incoming texts.

> so thanks for last night > yknow > for the ride > i mean > you know what i mean > anyway > so that folder i gave you had my BIO notes, not econ > im such a doofus > i need them back > don’t bother looking at them lol > can we meet up?

Tony groans, eyelids heavy as anvils. Jesus christ. He didn’t get home until four after dropping this guy off and he’s already up and bothering him? What gives?

Exhausted and annoyed, he tucks his phone under his pillow and sets it on do-not-disturb for extra measure. There ain’t no way he’s getting up at seven on a Saturday for fucking class notes. Prick.

In his opinion, he’s filled his quote of good deeds for the month and he doesn’t need to be up for another few hours. Whatever it is, he thinks, snuggling into his pillow, he’s sure it can wait.

---

The next time he wakes it’s just after nine. There’s a gap in his curtains allowing a sharp shard of sunlight into the room where it directly pierces into his eyelids. 

He groans tiredly into the drool patch on his pillow, willing sleep to come back to him, turning on his other side, gripping the edges of the quilt and tightening it around himself until he is firmly cocooned within it. It’s nice and warm, and sleep is such a rare commodity to him so it’s novel to bask in its dregs. But there isn’t any more sleep to come he’s quick to realize, giving up after a few minutes and blinking up at the ceiling. 

Nine is practically six. It’s criminal to be up this early.

There’s an unusual flurry of texts on his phone, some from Rhodey, but most of them are from Parker, an endless ladder of increasing franticness. 

Tony tosses his phone to the end of his bed carelessly. 

It’s been literally less than twelve hours since he’s had to deal with the shithead. Surely whatever was lodged up his ass couldn’t possibly be as important as Tony ignoring him. 

Swinging his legs off the bed, he stands and stretches his arms up high, fingers curling. The stretch feels good and he takes a quick sniff of his armpits to gauge if he can forego a shower for the third day in a row. 

The stench is wicked. It’s possible that he’s overdue.

He strips off as he heads towards the adjacent bathroom, naked and nursing a semi.

He can’t help but shudder as his back meets the cold tiles, the intuitive shower head following his body with a mechanical whir, miscalculating its aim and spraying him in the face.

Ah. That will need to be recalibrated, he notes. 

But, he can’t say he really minds, tolerating the spray, even as it hits his mouth like a fire hose. He ducks his head to wet his hair, reaching blindly for the touchpad to dial down the pressure. Once the water is to his liking he reaches down to take himself in hand, leisurely stroking himself.

It’s just a perfunctory part of his morning ritual; he doesn’t really have anyone in mind as he brings himself to full hardness, just the fleeting memory of lips around his cock, the next of a well rounded ass, not feeling particularly creative. 

Okay, so maybe he pictures some big, brown eyes and dark hair he can run his fingers through. And maybe he goes off like a rocket. That’s his business.

Anyway, once he’s out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist, he inspects his appearance in the mirror. The bruises on his face are still pretty gruesome, deep purple and beginning to yellow around the edges. The cut on his lip seems to be well and truly scabby.

Turning to the side, Tony takes observation of his overall torso region; his stomach is not as defined as he’d like it to be - probably due to his affinity for carbs and sweets, if he’s honest. Between a few fingers he can pinch the skin and pull it a little -- and look, he’s a bit soft around the middle, but he lifts, alright. Maybe he isn’t exactly steel cut like the dudebros on the football team who have made being ripped their life mission, but he has musculature under the adipose.

Is he a little self-conscious about it? Sure. Is he worried about it enough to give up garlic bread and cronuts? No. Especially when he spots a new chest hair nestled comfortably between his pecs.

Probably a bit too proud of himself because of a singular piece of hair, Tony gets dressed in a pair of jeans that have seen better days, speckled with singe marks and thinning at the knees and a singlet, slinging on his leather jacket for the finishing touch. 

He almost forgets the bot.

“Look at you,” he says, to the mangled mess of metal on his desk. Scooping the injured, beeping bot Tony stuffs it into his backpack. “Come here, darling. Shh, you’re okay.”

Peering both ways out of the hall to ensure the coast is clear, he quickly descends the stairs, shushing the bot the whole way.

On the ground floor, he pauses when he hears voices coming from his father’s office. It takes a second to recognise the voices, his father and Stane arguing over one another, loudly, then softly. He tries to listen in, catching somewhat audible hisses about the company finance officer.

Careful to avoid the floorboards that squeak he tiptoes to the kitchen to pocket a few muesli bars and a water bottle from the fridge. 

The voices get progressively louder as he sneaks to the front door, silently saluting their maid as he passes. She waves back at him, offering a sympathetic smile as he goes out the door. 

His heart pounds as he reaches his car, parked around the corner street. 

“Alright, baby,” he grins, revving the engine. “Let’s go.”

---

“The fuck?”

It’s hard to be sure, but perhaps Rhodey doesn’t expect Tony’s unannounced arrival at his front door. Not if the furious scowl and bunny slippers on his feet are anything to go by.

Nonetheless, he slips past the front door, welcoming himself into his friends home, despite the exasperated outcry of for fucks sake Tony, it’s Saturday and it’s not even noon, can’t you call ahead? 

No, he can’t call. Well, actually, he reconsiders, heading down the hall to the basement, his friends footsteps echoing behind him, he probably could, but it wouldn’t make anyone less mad at him, so what’s the point?

Besides, judging by the empty driveway and barren living room, Rhodey’s family is already out, he’s not sure what the issue is.

“The issue is I am tired, man,” his friend complains, following him down the stairs. “What are you doing here?”

“Me too, honeybear, freakin’ exhausted,” Tony mutters, skipping down the stairs. “Go back to bed. I’ll be out of your hair in a minute.”

“Oh sure, and let you solder your fingers together again. Nah. Not taking the fall for that.”

“I’m not going to solder my fingers together. I’m a pro.”

“Unless you need me to remind you of last summer,” Rhodey takes a seat at the workbench, “I suggest you shut up.”

“You’re rude, you know that?” Tony asks, retrieving the bot from his backpack and setting it upon the bench. “I’ll have you know that I’ve learned since then.”

“And yet you still refuse to wear gloves,” his friend sighs, settling heavily upon the adjacent chair. There’s a comfortable quiet between them while Tony works, carefully settling all the pieces onto the table, moving each with care.

It’s hard to miss the weight of observation on the back of his neck, but he lets his friend drink his fill before he’s ready to speak.

“You fuck up something?” He points to the bot.

Tony shakes his head, pressing the solder into the circuit board. “No. Well, yes. The coding is perfect, as usual, but this idiot isn’t any smarter than a Roomba. He’s meant to be smarter.”

“So?

“He is smarter. I dunno, sometimes he messes up,” Tony mumbles, reaching blindly for the bent-nose pliers before Rhodey places it in his hand. “He’s not bad, just dumb. It’s not his fault.”

“And again, what happened? Did you run him over?”

“No, the old man got sick of me playing with ‘toys’. Dumb-dumb here met the wall in a very dramatic fashion. It was an Oscar-worthy performance.”

There’s a sigh from behind him.

“Does that explain your face?”

Tony glances behind him and smirks. 

“You mean my dashing good looks?”

“Tony.”

“Honestly? I got into a fight with a feral racoon that ran off with some old lady’s purse. It nearly cost me an eye, but I saved the day. She called me a hero, gave me some stale crackers from her purse and then gave me her number.”

“Tony.”

“Fine. I was skateboarding. I was in the middle of executing a super complicated kickflip but lost control when an enlarged gutter rat scurried in front of me. I flew headfirst into the gravel. Very embarrassing. That work?”

“Tony.”

“Look, just leave it will ya? God, you’re like a nagging wife. Pick whichever story makes you feel all nice and fuzzy inside.”

Rhodey is suddenly before him, waving something in his face. “Your phone, jackass. Your better half is calling?”

Huh?

Tony blinks, gently setting down the pliers and the chip he’d removed, taking his phone. It vibrates, Your Better Half flashing across the screen. 

“Parker, ugh.” 

He really should have changed the contact name by now, he thinks, swiping to answer.

“Alcoholics Anonymous,” Tony answers by way of greeting. “How may I direct your call?”

“Ha ha, very funny, asshole. So you are awake. I’ve been trying to contact you all morning.”

“I know. I’m beginning to think you actually might have separation issues,” Tony says. “I just got rid of you like eight hours ago.”

“I’m calling about the folder. Didn’t you read my texts?“

“Oh, I read them,” Tony settles back on the stool and continues to work on the main circuit. “See, I was just ignoring you. Hoping you’d take the hint, but I forget subtlety is lost on you.”

“Look, I need my notes. Can we meet up?”

“Right, for Bio,” Tony rolls his eyes. “Can’t it wait until Monday?”

“No. I, uh -- I have a test first period. I need to study for it.”

“Uh-huh. Just remember, the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. You’ll be fine.”

“I take AP Bio, asswipe, I’m aware of that. Can I just get it back, please?”

“You take AP Bio? Was that an admin error or something?” he asks, holding the chip he’d retrieved earlier up to the light to inspect for any damage. 

It looks to be ok. The damage to the bot overall seems to be mostly cosmetic, couple of scratches, a few dents. Nothing that a few replacement panels wont fix. Whatever he hasn’t already got stored here Rhodey will surely have spare parts, it’ll be fine. God, what would he do if his friend didn’t lovingly tolerate Tony using his space for storage and barging in whenever he lucks. It’s lucky Rhode’s parents are so chill though, unlike his own. He may be a hot-head but he’s practically a saint compared to -

“ - hello? Are you still there? I can hear you breathing.”

Tony blinks. “Right. Your notes. Look, I’m kinda busy. I have a life outside of you and I don’t actually care about your academic integrity, so, you’re gonna have to wait.”

“For how long?”

“I’ll drop them off this evening, like six-ish. Hey, maybe we could do that interview with May if she’ll be around.”

“...I’m not sure that’s the best idea.”

“C’mon, I already told you I’m not actually hot for your aunt. I’ll be professional.”

Rhodey shoots him a bewildered look.

“That’s not what -- look, whatever. Just don’t be late okay. I have a life outside of you too.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that one before. I’ll try and not get in the way of your weekend plans of crying while you masturbate.”

“I literally hate you.”

“And yet you aren’t denying the crying. Anyway, I have to go now, try to clean yourself up before I get there. See you at six, bubby,” he hangs up, cracking his neck before refocusing on his mangled creation. “Now where were we?”

“What the fuck.”

Tony pauses, pliers in hand. There is a particular expression on Rhodey’s face erring on the side of confused and haunted. 

“What?”

“’Bubby’?”

“Don’t say it like that - it’s like an inside thing. Don’t repeat it to him, alright, he’ll get pissy. And then I’ll get pissy.”

“You know it’s just a project, right? You two aren’t actually married.”

“Thank god. Could you imagine being married to that guy?” Tony shudders. “Scary.”

“Two weeks ago you said he was the bane of your existence. Now you have ‘inside things’ with him? You saw him last night?”

He sighs, shoulders dropping. Yeah, he doesn’t really have a good explanation for any of that. 

The thing about himself, Tony’s found over time and trial, is that he really, really likes to press buttons. He likes to test variables, wants to see what would happen if he did something he wasn’t supposed to, and map out the world as it occurs in motion around him. Curiosity means he likes to test the parameters, to see what can yield, what will bite back.

More often than not that kind of impulsive brand of curiosity has gotten him in some sort of trouble. Turns out not everything and everyone appreciates being tested - and many things like to lash out when pressed.  

Parker, Tony has found, is somebody that doesn’t yield or bite. If Tony was a betting man he’d have placed his money on the boy being more of a yielding type - but what he does is he presses buttons just as much as Tony does, buttons he didn’t even know he had to be pressed. 

And that very much interests Tony.

He just doesn’t know what to do with that information, except to keep pressing.

“I’ll explain later,” Tony promises, mentally crossing his fingers. “In the meantime, can we forget about Parker and focus on my broken baby here?”

Rhodey relents, but Tony knows that look in his eye. He’ll be hearing about it later and at the most inconvenient time. And he’s gonna tell Pepper.

Wonderful.

He really should change Peter’s contact name in his phone.

---

By the time he leaves the Rhodes residence and heads to his next destination, his robot is in somewhat in working order again. It remains fairly immobile though, just until Tony can replace the damaged infrared and touch sensor. It clicks its metal claws sadly towards Tony in the passenger seat as he drives.

It’s a Roy Orbison kind of day, so the music is loud and the guitar is heavy as he makes the drive to Harlem.

And if Tony frees a hand to pat the bot on its’ metal head every so often, that’s his business.

When he reaches the other side of the city he parks in his usual space at a nearby lot and contemplates whether or not he should leave the malfunctioning bot in his car for the sake of being professional. It clicks at his jacket, weakly grasping the material as if on a plea - and damn, Tony knows the thing isn’t actually sentient but what kind of asshole would he be if he left it here for the day.

Heart squeezing with sympathy, Tony delicately places him in the backpack, leaving the zip partially open for ‘air’.

Next, snacks.

While he’s retrieving a pack (or two) of Reeses, he comes across Parker’s folder that he’d stashed there last night. Their conversation from earlier returns to the forefront of his mind.

Look, Parker might not be the knuckle-dragging, monosyllabic dumbass Tony initially suspected that he was, and yeah he was savvy as demonstrated during their trip to the rental market - and yeah, definitely smarter than his social circle would suggest, and is absolutely and a source of constant surprise to Tony - but is he AP Bio - or AP anything material? 

Time to find out.

The first thing that Tony notices is that the notes are definitely not for Bio. They’re for Econ, as initially prescribed. 

The second thing he notices, as he flicks through the papers, skimming over the complicated graphs and annotated research, is that what he’s reading is actually good. 

Well, I’ll be darned, Tony thinks, eyes getting progressively wider as he flicks through the pages. Not bad at all.

Makes him wonder why Parker thought he was missing his Bio notes though.

The answer to that becomes clear when a crumpled envelope falls out of the stack onto Tony’s lap. He picks it up, at first thinking it’s a part of the research, but pauses. It’s open and it’s addressed to May Parker.

“Um,” he says.

It’s from Queens Presbyterian Hospital, which should make him drop it as if it were burning. It doesn’t, though. Either it’s meant to be included in the folder, or it’s not and that’s why Parker has been acting like a crazy-ex all morning.

Hmm. Tony sits there, torn, debating whether or not to look into it, the overdue stamp standing out against the crisp paper like a warning sign. On one hand, he’s running kinda late and, y’know, privacy or whatever -- on the other, his fingers are already itching to know what’s in it.

Mind your own business, he can already hear Rhodey saying, mind your own business, Tony.

Curiosity and a distinct lack of a moral compass wins, as always. Just a quick peek, that should be okay, right? The envelope is already open anyway, so, it’s not like anyone will be able to tell.

God, this is none of my business, he tells himself, even as he’s retrieving the letter from within and starts reading it. 

Oh.

Tony quickly stashes the letter back into the envelope and back into the folder. Yep, definitely none of his business. 

Yeah, he really shouldn’t have done that. Big fucking yikes on his behalf. And yep, there’s the guilt -- or at least he thinks the stomach churning is guilt, it could be the stale muesli bar he ate on the way.

Nonetheless, it hangs over him like a dark cloud as he picks up his backpack and heads out to the garage across the road. What kind of asshole looks into someone’s mail because they can’t help themselves. This dick, that’s who.

Fixing a grin he doesn’t really feel, he heads to the back office. He knocks on the window, ducking his head into the open door.

“Yo,” he waves to the man sitting behind the desk. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Hey kid,” the man looks up, smiling before his face drops. “Tony, your face. What happened?”

“This? It’s nothing --”

“-- is that why you couldn’t come to work yesterday? Not that I mind,” the man stands up. “Are you okay? Was it --”

“-- Was it nothing to worry about? Absolutely,” Tony holds his hands up in surrender. “Just an unfortunate encounter with a wild, feral squirrel in Central Park. I tell you, they’re deceivingly cute, but they’re pests. Totally out of control.”

“Tony.”

“Jarvis,” he interrupts, gesturing to the cars in the garage behind him. “C’mon. Look, let’s get to work, okay? Save the violins for later.”

And by later he means never.

The man sighs, world-weary, looking at him like he knows exactly what he’s thinking. At first he’s certain his boss is going to push the issue, but it must be a day for dodging bullets because he relents.

“Alright, kid. I got a ninety-four Ford sedan back there with your name on it. Busted fan belt, overheated engine. Probably needs a new set of spark plugs while you’re at it.”

With a grateful nod, Tony heads back, locating the vehicle in question. It’s rusted to all hell and probably not worth the cost of repair, but he gets stuck into it anyway, keen for a distraction. He sets his bag and bot down near him while Jarvis blasts Alice Cooper’s Poison.

Tony might not have all the answers to life’s problems, but this is something he knows how to fix.

---

He probably distracts himself a little too well, because by the time he’s wrapped up with the Ford it’s already five-thirty and he’s a mess of engine oil and coolant.

It’s only when Jarvis squeezes his shoulder and points to the clock on the far wall does he realise that he’s lost his sense of time. How the fuck is he supposed to clean up and get all the way from Harlem to Queens at this time of night?

“Ah, crap,” Tony mutters, setting down his socket-wrench in his toolbox. “I’m late.”

“Late for what? You got a hot date or something?” Jarvis asks, stepping back to give him some room as he rushes to the staff bathroom. 

“What, no,” He calls back, running the faucet and pumping soap over his hands. “I gotta go see about a guy.” He struggles to hear his boss over the running water but he doesn’t have time to stop and figure it out. 

“From school?”

“Yes, and a prime pain in my ass,” Tony mutters, drying his hands on his jeans, walking back into the garage. “Anyway, see you Monday, chief?”

His boss nods, passing Tony his earnings for the week in cash. Tony should have known to dash and run because he starts hearing the proverbial violins when Jarvis clamps a hand on his shoulder, squeezing in a way that is more paternal than Tony is comfortable with. 

“You know you can call me, you have my number. You come up and see me and the missus whenever you want.”

Tony fake snores.

“Jarvis.”

“We have a spare room,” he insists, shrugging sheepishly and stepping back. “It’s yours at any time.”

“I see you enough, okay, don’t push it. I’ll see you Monday,” Tony draws him into a one-armed hug and claps him on the back. “Don’t you worry about me.” 

“Don’t make me worry.”

“No promises,” Tony salutes, slinging his backpack on shoulder and walking backwards out of the garage to the street. “Hug the missus for me.”

Jarvis salutes back. 

With that he sprints across the street when there’s a gap in traffic, bot snapping gently at his hair as he runs.

Sweaty and sore, he is full of energy, a sense of accomplishment coursing through his blood, like an afternoon of work can only provide. He should fire off a text, he thinks, as he starts the ignition and heads out onto the road, yeah. Let Parker know he will be late.

And he does genuinely mean to send a message at the next traffic stop, but then Queen starts playing on the radio and Tony isn’t a fool, okay, he turns that up loud.

Next traffic stop, he promises himself.

---

“I’m beginning to think you can’t read the time,” Parker opens the door with a scowl. “You said six.”

Wincing in the hallway, Tony looks at his phone. Six-fifty-nine. It’s not totally his fault, okay. There was a pile up along the way and traffic was a nightmare of  ridiculous proportions. He swears he’s gonna be the first person to invent a commercially viable flying car just for the sake of personally avoiding road congestion.

“Yeah, so. Here’s the thing: I had things to do, okay, priorities --”

“You and your priorities, I swear to god --”

“Here,” Tony cuts him off, passing him his folder, letter neatly inside where it isn’t going to obviously slip out. “Your folder, dumbass.”

Peter grips it, holding it to his chest as he stares at Tony for a moment, before passing it to the nearest flat surface, a weathered and small table that holds their keys.

“Okay, thanks,” Peter nods, smiling grimly, looking behind his shoulder. “Appreciate it. You can go now.”

“So where are the Econ notes,” Tony blurts, wincing as he plays dumb. “I mean, if you had something prepared.”

Peter blinks, surprised. “Oh, uh. Um, It can wait until Monday, can’t it?”

“The assignment is due Wednesday.”

“Right. Um, just give me a sec --”

“Is that Tony?”

May appears behind Peter, smiling brightly. Tony waves, rocking back on his feet. 

“Hey, Missus Parker.”

“Hey there, handsome,” she hip-checks her nephew, joining him in the doorway and glancing between the two. “You didn’t mention we were having company tonight, Pete.”

“He’s not handsome and he’s not staying --”

“-- I was just dropping something off,” he looks to Peter. “And excuse you, the lady has spoken and I have to agree. I am handsome. Some might even say that I’m debonair.”

“And some might say that you’re deplorable.”

“Hmm, I think you mean adorable.”

That prompts a smile out of Peter. He crosses his arms over his chest and tilts his chin up, all haughty.

“Tony Stark, you are many things, but adorable isn’t one of them.”

He leans in, pouting playfully. “Oh come on, Parker. I’m a little cute, aren’t I?”

“No.”

“Not even a little?”

“Uh, let me check,” Peter pauses before smiling sardonically. “Verdicts in - jury says you’re one-hundred-percent despicable. Sorry.”

"I’m sure I could sway the jury.”

“I think you mean you could pay the jury.”

Tony nods, pretending to be serious. “Well, yeah. You know, for consensus.”

Peter licks his lips, shifting closer.

“Consensus is important...”

“...Well, if you two are done,” May says after an extended period of silence, tying her hair back into a ponytail. “We were just about to head out to a Thai place around the corner. Tony, you should join us.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay. I should go --”

The rest of his words are cut off by a truly monstrous growl of his stomach. He winces, scrunching up his nose sheepishly. He probably should have eaten more than Reeses all afternoon.

“Well, I guess that settles that,” May says, stepping out of the doorway and beckoning Tony in. “Come in. Sorry about the mess.” 

It’s with Peter still staring at him that he reluctantly enters their apartment, brushing past the other boy. It looks the same as it did the other week, mostly tidy and smelling like incense. There’s a sizeable stack of unfolded laundry on the dining table, however, that wasn’t there before. 

Tony’s distracted by a pair of dancing-bulbasaur boxers sticking out of the pile when May leans in close to sniff at his hair. 

“You’ve got something in your hair, honey. Is that paint?”

He runs his fingers through his hair, palm coming back streaked with green. “Oh, uh, radiator fluid,” he explains, holding up his hand. 

“Can I ask what you did to your face?”

“I saved a homeless guy and his beef-sandwich from a pack of rabid, angry dogs. No need to call me a hero.”

May looks at him oddly. “Oh, well, if you say so. Go get yourself washed up and we can head out.”

The burn of Peter’s stare follows him all the way to their bathroom.

---

The meal is less awkward than Tony thought it would be.

Well, for him at least.

Over larb and khao pad they’d gotten through an informal interview with May about her experience as a caregiver with a single income. Not only was it informative for his own future financial independence, but she has been generous enough to speckle in colorful anecdotes of her nephew’s upbringing. Parker’s face has been getting progressively redder all night and it has nothing to do with the spice in his food.

Tony has enjoyed the evening thoroughly.

“ - and of course, we were lucky we hadn’t decided to go cheap on the health insurance. Especially when Pete here broke his wrist at gymnastics when he was eight.”

Tony barely holds back a snort. 

“You did gymnastics, Parker?”

Peter tips his head back to stare at the ceiling and sighs. The flush seems to be creeping down his neck too, Tony observes gleefully. He stuffs a large mouthful of rice in his mouth to mitigate the urge to tease. 

"Yes, he was very good, weren’t you, Pete? So talented, you should see his medals.”

“Stop, please.”

“C’mon, no need to be embarrassed, Pete, you were amazing,” she says. “You’re still a flexible little bug, aren’t you?”

Tony chokes on his rice.

Peter has his eyes squeezed shut and looks like he wants the earth to swallow him whole. 

“May, I’m literally begging you.”

“Uh,” he beats at his chest with his fist, swallowing roughly. “So how long did you do that for?”

“Until I was fourteen.”

“Why’d you quit?”

There’s a very deliberate, weighted pause. May and Peter share a look between them and Tony gets a deeply uncomfortable sense that he’s just stuck his foot in it. Retract, he thinks, already regretting opening his mouth.

“Well,” May clears her throat, her tone light. “After my husband, Pete’s uncle Ben died, we moved away and we had to make some... financial cuts at the time.”

The bite he’s just taken goes to ash in his mouth. God, he really is a big idiot isn’t he. He’d assumed that May never got married to the man in the photos or that they’d just divorced, he didn’t realise that he’d passed - and so recently, too. Welling up with shame, he can’t stop himself from glancing at Peter, who’s staring at the table, lips pursed.

“Oh,” he clears his throat. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to - I didn’t know. Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” May waves her hand dismissively, but her smile is strained. “Anyway, what about you, Tony? You’re severely asthmatic, right? That must have been hard, growing up if you wanted to play sports.”

Tony’s eyes widen.

“Yes, um, so hard. Luckily I’m not really an exercise-y kinda guy. I personally prefer to keep a heart rate below eighty beats per minute.”

“Did you have any hobbies growing up?”

“Yeah, driving my parents crazy,” Tony says, glad for the shift from the somber topic. “Escaping from nannies, seeing how quickly I could get them to quit.”

“You like tinkering,” Peter says quietly, looking up. “You mentioned, before. Cars and stuff.”

He shrugs, starting to feel as if he’s under the microscope, especially when Peter looks at him, eyes glittering with thinly-veiled interest. 

“I mean, I don’t know. I like - building stuff, I guess. Machines and robots, y’know, cars. It’s like, whatever.”

“You want to be the next Elon Musk or somethin’?” Peter asks, not unkindly, resting his chin on his hand.

“Nah, I wanna be the first Tony Stark,” he scratches his cheek, suddenly bashful. It’s an uncommon feeling for him. One hard to avoid, however, particularly when there is a boy who Tony doesn’t really hate who’s asking about his life like it might matter. 

He clears his throat. “Anyway, mostly it was just me cataloguing all the ways I could make the vein in my fathers’ head pop. I’m still working on that.”

May looks between them, smiling.

“Sounds like you were a handful.”

“Sure was.”

Still is, apparently, no matter how much he tries to stay out of the way.

The silence that follows is punctuated by the sounds of cutlery scraping across plates, of shrinking ice cubes rattling against glass. It feels pensive at the same time as it does thorny, like Tony opened the door to let someone in but accidentally let out a few ghouls.

And despite knowing he’d stepped on a landmine with the Parkers, he can’t help but wonder what other pieces of the puzzle he’s missing. Why Peter doesn’t live with his parents. Not that Tony is invested in him or anything.

He just doesn’t like mysteries, that’s all.

May excuses herself after to head to the bathroom not long after. It’s during that time that the waiter brings the check, which Tony takes immediately, slipping in some of the cash he’d gotten earlier, despite Peter’s protests. He was gonna do it anyway, even if he didn’t have the letter in the back of his mind.

“Stop paying for me,” Peter says after he passes the check-book back to the waiter. “Your family is rich, I get it. I’ve told you, I don’t need your charity.”

Tony shakes his head. It’s not worth mentioning that the only money he spends doesn’t come from his family.

“It’s not charity. Do you really think I’m that nice, eh? C’mon. Maybe I like lording it over you.”

“Well, at some point I’m going to pay you back.”

“And when that time comes I’m not going to accept your money.”

“You will,” Peter smiles wryly down at his plate. “I have my ways.”

“As do I, sweetums. Now, do me a favour: shut up and finish your larb.”

Peter does, but something about him shifts. It seems more quiet and contemplative, his eyes staying longer on Tony than they normally would. He wants to tell him to take a picture, but for once, Tony thinks it’s probably best if he keeps his mouth shut.

---

Back at the apartment, Peter goes to retrieve his ‘Econ notes’, taking the folder from the table and retreating to his bedroom. In the interim, May offers to let Tony stay over, inviting him for what he’s sure would be a rousing game of Mario Kart. 

He politely declines.

“You sure? Winner gets to choose a movie.”

“I should really get home,” he says. “Thanks though. And thanks for dinner.”

“No problem. Thank you for paying, you didn’t have to do that. Let me pay you back.”

“No need. Think of it as payment for your services and letting us pick your brain tonight.”

She reluctantly accepts with a lot less pride than what her nephew displayed and that makes Tony feel a little sick, because it’s evident that she’s a proud and stubborn woman by nature. Her acceptance, albeit laboured, speaks volumes as to the reasoning behind it.

What takes him by surprise is when she hugs him goodbye and kisses his cheek.

“You’re a good egg, Anthony. Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

It’s probably the most maternal touch he’s had since, well. Probably since he last went to stay with Jarvis and his wife. Fidgeting in the hold, he’s not sure if he wants to squirm or to sink into it.

May leaves when Peter comes back in, a familiar stack of notes in his hands that he passes to Tony.

“You gonna kiss me goodbye, too?”

“What?” Peter blinks.

"Uh, never mind,” Tony waves the papers at him. “Thanks for this.”

Peter looks around to make sure they’re alone before leaning in rather promptly. 

“Wow, hold up on the proximity there,” Tony inches back, startled by their sudden closeness. “I was joking about the kiss --”

“You read the letter, didn’t you,” Peter whisper-hisses.

“What? Letter? What letter?” Tony says, voice strangled. “I don’t know of any letter.”

He gets a painful poke in his chest for his lies.

“Don’t play dumb. It wasn’t where I left it.”

“I’m not -- ow, quit poking me.”

“Then stop lying. You’re unbelievable -- don’t you know that opening someone else’s mail is a crime?”

Tony’s shoulders slump as he concedes.

“Look, it was an accident, it just slipped out. And also, it’s not technically a crime, if the envelope was already open.”

“Oh and the letter magically opened itself and forced you to read it.” 

“That could be argued.”

“Why couldn’t you mind your own business?“

Sick of being poked, he shoves the papers between his arm and his ribs to hold them and takes Peter’s fingers in his hands, squeezing the digits when they struggle to break free of his hold.

“I should have, I admit it - I didn’t think, okay, I’m sorry. Is she okay?”

Peter stops struggling, looking over his shoulder again.

“I don’t know,” he leans in again to whisper, “I only found it yesterday, I haven’t spoken to her yet. Look, I know you hate me, but can you please not tell anyone about this?”

“Why would I tell anyone?”

“I don’t know, because you’re the devil, and you get a kick out of seeing me suffer?”

“True, but I’m not going to tell anyone. Promise. That would make me look like an asshole and you like a martyr. Ergo, I shut my cake hole and continue looking better than you.”

“You’re a real prince charming,” the other boy huffs, but seems to take him at face value. “If I find out differently I’m going to come after you. You’re going to need dental work afterwards.”

Tony lets go of their joined hands, balling his fists and raising them to his face, mimicking what the other boy had done last night. 

“You wanna tousle, huh?”

He gets a light shove out the doorway for his attitude.

“Alright, smartass. Get the fuck outta here already.”

“Going, going. Goodnight, princess.”

He mock bows, peering up under his eyelashes, momentarily arrested as he watches Parker roll his eyes and bite his bottom lip in an attempt to smother a smile. 

His heart continues to beat a bit oddly all the way down to the car, where he sits in contemplative silence for a few moments until the sound of metal clicking shifts him out of his thoughts.

“Oh, hey you,” he coos, gently retrieving his bot from his bag and placing it in the passenger seat, instantly feeling bad. “I didn’t think I would take so long. I’m sorry.”

Placing a seatbelt over the bot and buckling him in, Tony begins to narrate his night to him as he pulls off the curb and begins driving.

“I guess that Parker isn’t so bad,” he tells the bot, who swivels its head in response to his voice. “I mean, he can’t dress for shit and has questionable tastes in friends - oh, and cannot hold his liquor - but I dunno, baby-bot. He’s okay. Don’t tell anyone I said that, though -- and oh my god, did I mention he did gymnastics, what a fucking dork...”

The thoughts churn and buoy him until he pulls up to his house nearly an hour later. From the driveway he can see his fathers office light still on.

The sight of it makes his stomach drop, all good cheer gone in an instant. 

“Damn,” Tony whispers to himself, tapping his knuckles against the steering wheel. This time of night on a Saturday can only mean one thing and he is really not in the mood to be in the crosshairs of whatever his father and Stane are up to.

But before he can work himself into a worry his phone vibrates in his pocket.

> hey, look, thanks for not being a total dick tonight about everything > and last night as well, I guess > yknow what i mean < ur welcome < by the way, i’m proud of you  > for what < not finishing off ur aunts beer tonight < takes strength < asking for help is the first step > omfg i take back what i said > ur the worst < and ur a pain in my ass > they have creams for that u know > anyway, g’nite, butthole > p.s. you’re still not adorable Tony smiles down at his phone. < goodnight bambi The bot clicks at him, breaking him out of his train of thought.

“Don’t look at me like that. Let’s go in, but you gotta keep quiet, okay.”

He manages to avoid detection and attention from anyone, despite accidentally stepping on a squeaky floorboard. Maybe it had something to do with the record player and raucous laughter coming from the office.

In any case, Tony’s just happy to make it back to his bedroom. There, he toes off his sneakers and starts getting ready for bed, stashing the leftover cash into a drawer.

It makes him think about Peter’s reluctance for Tony to pay for over the last couple of instances, and how freaking annoying that is. And rude. 

Honestly, the dude should count himself as one of the lucky guys - Tony is not that magnanimous. He doesn’t experience an impulsive, unthinking eagerness to provide for just anybody.

Oh.

Tony stills in the middle of his bedroom.

Oh no.

He knows what this is.

“This is bad.”

---

*

*

---

tagging: @bylerboyfriends @ravens-starker-stuff, @starker-rays, @ironspiderstarker, @muse-of-gods, @notfor-temporaryuse, @tabbycat1220, @sugarfreecult, @rebel13lion39, @plueschpop, @spideravocados, @jellybbunny,  @booktrashme, @elfkido, @mycatislickingmybedsheets, @queerghostboyo, @disneyprincessdominatrix, @cherrygoldlove @starkerflowers @starkeristheendgame @thewolffearsher @starkersugar , @starkerforlife6969, @css1992, @parkerrbitch, @fuckmemrstark, @blankblankityblank, @ilovemoreid, @blaquedecember, @killmylonelysoul, @notfor-temporaryuse, @arvaen

[su-univeralai]

GOOODDDD MORRNNNNIINNNGGGGG SUU 💛

I am here for your essay. Or yknow, just any dunebaby facts that you can spare.

*heavy breathing* oh no, she's come for my OCs exactly like she said she would.

lolol Ok, I've got bios on 9 out of 10 of my kids so far, but I wrote a quick blurb about them so hopefully you can't figure out who I didn't start until now lol. The older 4 (which 3/4 are legit characters in LOK, but tweaked to my liking) are grown-ass adults while the other 6 are probably between 14-21. So, our beloved Taang parents have been popping kids out from when they were 18 or 19 to 39 or 40 years old.

At some point I'll make a family tree for you, since most of the older dunebabies have their own families and that can be confusing. Some have more information than others, but more will be added on each of them as time goes on. I just haven't figured them out yet.

Also, gonna put a cut here, because it's a long post and I know not everyone wants to see my OCs lol.

Ok Onto the Dunebabies from oldest to youngest:

Gyatso (M) Airbender, 35: Named after Aang’s father figure, Gyatso is Toph and Aang’s first born and first of several airbending children. He has a knack for the art and excelled quickly with mastering it, narrowly falling short of beating Aang’s record of mastering airbending at 13. As he got older and his parents continued having children, he became like a father figure to the younger ones. That’s the best part about having tons of kids, right? At some point the older ones raise the younger ones and the parents can just have fun. Once Tiao Wu turned 13, Gyatso and his own wife, boyfriend, and kids moved away from home and resided in the Western Air Temple with some Air Acolytes.

Lin (F) Earthbender, 32: Lin is a straight arrow, always following the rules. Sometimes Toph’s jokes that her first born daughter is actually Katara’s because wasn’t as goofy as Gyatso and Tenzin. As kids, Lin and Tenzin butted heads like no other. They may have had a year or two when they got along, but that was when Lin was training to be a police officer and Tenzin was always out because he was dating Pema. They constantly bicker at family gatherings, but make a mean team when they spar against the other next gen kids. Their twin telepathy (yes, they are twins in my universe) comes into play and they are undefeatable. That is until the triplets becomes masters in their own right. While Lin is a talented earthbender and metalbender, she struggled with picking it up (perhaps because of Toph’s hardcore teaching style). She responded to a “more gentle approach” as Katara would say, and Aang helped her learn the basics until she was ready to take on Toph’s more intense lessons. Lin is definitely closer with Aang than she is with Toph, but goes to mom if something needs to be done quickly and under wraps. Lin works long hours as chief of the police force in republic city, so she doesn’t have much time for romance. When she finds a spare moment for intimacy, she frequents a bar that accepts everyone. She brought Songa with her before her little sis fell in love with (insert steambaby daughter name here).

Tenzin (M) Airbender, 32: Tbh Tenzin still marries Pema and has his four kids, like in LOK. Lol. Unlike the show, with the weight of the whole air nation not on his shoulders, Tenzin was not a serious kid. He played pai sho with the white lotus members and roughed it up with Lin. Tenzin had a difficult time mastering airbending, though. He lacked the spiritual connection that his father and brother easily had. He blamed being stuck with an earthbender in the womb for 9 months at his lack of skill with airbending. His masters airbending at 21 and is pumped to finally get his tattoos. Since Pema is an air acolyte, I'm saying that her parents were also acolytes, and she and Tenzin met as kids and got along really well. They started dating at 16. Tenzin wanted to wait to get his arrows before proposing to her, so they date for 5 long years as Pema cheered him on in the grueling training. Tenzin and Pema eventually move to the Northern Air Temple and kept Teo company.

Suyin (F) Earthbender, 26: Suyin was a troublemaker when she was a kid, always pranking her siblings. She spent way too much time with Sokka. At least that’s what Toph says. Her teenage years, that’s when things became dicey. With Lin on the streets as a cop and Su committing petty crimes, the two were bound to cross paths. After Lin brought her in for whay must have been the thousandth time and Toph had to bail her out, Toph sent her to the her old stomping ground: the Earth Rumble 6. Toph still had her ear in the stadium and stayed in touch with The Boulder, and she thought it’d do her some good to get beat up by other earthbenders. Su stayed with her grandparents and got the structure she needed and got her act together. She got pounded by her opponents the first few years, but she slowly moved her way up the food chain and eventually held her mother’s old title as champion. Once she turned 18, she left to travel the world, meeting up with Kya (can't decide if Kya will be a steambaby or a Sukka baby. Is there a cut name for Sukka babies?). Along the way she met Bataar and fell in love with him and together build zaofu and have all their kids from LOK.

Songa (F) Airbender, 21: The oldest of the triplets to be born. Songa is a calm spirit, she reminds Aang of Yangchen with her way of keeping the peace in their large family. She’s a true romantic like her father and catches the attention of a lot of men, but alas, her heart is won over by one of Katara and Zuko’s daughters, (insert steambaby name here lol). She sees the best in everyone and trusts a little too easily. Watch out though, if you get on her bad side or betray her trust one too many times, her mother’s sass and tongue come out and no one wants to be hit by her earthbending styled airbending. Songa is a talented bender and has a tendency to use her airbending like an earthbender, facing things head on. She can seemlessly switch between styles, but she'd prefer to take her opponents on directly.

Kera (F) Nonbender, 21: Kera is the heart of the triplets. She’s passionate like a firebender and meets conflict head-on like her mom. Being the first non-bender didn’t feel great coming from the lineage of the Avatar and Toph Beifond, strongest earthbender in the world and metalbender originator, but she found peace in being a non-bender when hearing all the stories of Sokka, Suki, Mai, Ty Lee, Teo, and their many other friends taking down bender and non-benders alike. Kera begged her parents to live in the Fire Nation to study under Mai and Ty Lee. Aang and Toph didn’t have any problems with her going, but Zuko and Katara did, fearing she (being a dunebaby) would cause mayhem in the palace. Only after swearing to Zuko that she wouldn’t make a mess did the Fire Lord allow her stay with them. During her time there, she mastered Mai and Ty Lee’s techniques and trained under the Yuyan archers. When she came home, she could beat the other two thirds of her triplets easily. Only when she teams up with the other two, can they take down Lin and Tenzin.

Choekyi (M) Airbender, 21: The last of the triplets to come be birthed. Choekyi is a free spirit, much like his father. He enjoys traveling and meeting new people. As a child (and an adult) he is easily excited and is a very charismatic guy, which gets him far with the ladies in his teens and early twenties. He’s never scared of trying new things, sometimes to his detriment, as he gets hurt a lot for someone light on his toes. His preferred method of transportation is air scooter. Choekyi gets along with Uncle Sokka the most, with his never ending jokes and letting him learn how to throw a boomerang even though he’s a bender. Choekyi spends some time in the swamp with the swamp benders just because he finds them to be hilarious and interesting. This is where he connects with his spirituality and returns to excel in airbending, and earns his tattoos.

Songa and Kera are idenitcal twins, so no one (beside Toph and Choekyi) can tell them apart until Songa earns her arrows. Choekyi looks similar to them, as he is their triplet, but since he came from a different egg, he turns out to be much taller than his sisters. Just imagine Toph's face when she feels three freakin' heartbeats along with hers. Idk if that's scientifically sound, but it's my universe, so I can say what I want lol.

Gyun (M) Nonbender, 18: He's a very musical guy. Gyun means music, but it can also mean germ or bacteria. So his older siblings make fun of him when he’s young. While his bending siblings practice and spar, he masters most musical instruments and even becomes a skilled singer. He’s a favorite of Uncle Iroh’s and spends time with him playing music and perfecting his tea making when he’s not training with Master Piandao and mastering different types of sword fighting styles. Gyun is a lover, not a fighter, and is recruited as the youngest member of the national opera company. He rises in fame, without having to reveal his high ranking connections to his family members. Gyun is a true renaissance man (you know if the renaissance existed back then). He looks up to all of his siblings and soaks in all the stories and advice his can get to perfect the art of storytelling and acting.

MeiLin (F) Nonbender, 17: MeiLin may be one of the youngest, but she’s definitely the sassiest of the bunch. With the personality like her mother, it’s no wonder she’s a bosslady even from a young age. She doesn’t take shit from anyone. While she’s the beauty of the dunebabies (but who really isn’t attractive in this family?) and can hold her poise better than any royal, from the tender age of three, she’s wanted to become the fiercest fighter in the world. After a lot of convincing, Toph and Aang let her train with Aunt Suki and learn how to fight like a Kyoshi Warrior. After she masters that, She begs her parents to send her to the Fire Nation to study under Mai and Ty Lee. By the time she’s 14, she’s already mastered the art of dagger throwing, chi blocking, and the Kyoshi warriors fighting style. Aang isn’t too pleased that she fights in tournaments like Toph did, but Toph watches every match she can get! MeiLin asks her to bet on her and they split the wealth at the end. Lin wants her youngest sister to join the police force when she turns 18, but MeiLin isn't sure she wants to enforce the law like Lin.

Tiao Wu (M) Earthbender, 14: The baby of the family, and loves it. Unlike MeiLin, Tiao Wu is a homebody and a huge mama’s boy, though really isn’t a mama’s boy in the Beifong Family? Like his name suggests, he’s a great dancer and for an earthbender, he sure is light on his toes. While Gyatso is called Twinkletoes Jr, Tiao Wu is known as the Fancy Dancer. Literally. That’s the stage name he chose for his bending dance competitions. When he’s not dancing or hanging out with Toph, he’s studying his cousin’s bending forms, wanting to incorporate it into his repertoire. Tiao Wu is also close to Aang, as he showed an early talent to be one with the spirits. As a six year old, he would meditate next to Aang and beat the freakin’ Avatar, master of all four elements and bridge between the physical and spiritual world, to the Spirit World. He’s also known to be the only human who is allowed to visit Wong Si Tong’s library there.

ALRIGHT Joy, here are some basic facts about my dunebabies universe. If you or anyone else wants to send me asks so I can more deeply construct their personalities, feel free!

[xnchxntmxnt]

OMG HAPPY 2OO LUV!! ILYSM, AND YOU DEFINITELY DESERVE MORE!! AS EXPECTED I'M HERE FOR THE MATCHUP EVENT AND I'M SO SORRY FOR BEING LATE KSDJFHSDF

1 | name : amie 2 | pronouns : s/her 3 | preferred gender : doesn't really matter 4 | self-description :

— it's ya clown sho <3 anyway, i'm an ambivert but more inclined towards the introvert side. my MBTI is INFJ and i'm a Gemini. i'd describe myself as someone who's very observant? yea, i guess. i'm awkward and you know it. My favorite color is blue, specifically sapphire, but i love all pastel colors. My fav show is Chicago Medical and all the psychological and crime thrillers out there are my favorite ( silent patient is my #1 though ) I love painting, playing piano and basketball!

— what i look in a partner you ask, uh, someone who can tolerate my silence. there are times when i go quiet for a whole day, i'll barely speak, no interaction nothing. i want someone who'd not exactly 'deal with it' but 'understand it.' also, i want someone who i can talk to without any hesitation. i have a hard time opening up so i don't do it but when i do, i spill almost everything. i might cry, might have anxiety attack, i might even shout. i know it's not very healthy but i want someone who can help me with those. plus someone who i can read with please <3 cheating and not having any respect for personal space would be the major deal breaker for me

5 | gen. aesthetic : my fashion sense starts from sweats and ends in sweats. i'm a big fan of those oversized hoodies and shirts, like something really comfy. however, i do have a collection of formal wears like blazers and dress.

6 | color/s to describe myself : red, actually. if not read then blue. it switchers but red 90% of the times.

7 | fav song/s : literally everything by Chase Atlantic and The Neighborhood. However, my absolute favorites are some of the famous classical pieces like Experience by Ludovico Einaudi and Chopin's Ballade No. 1 Op 23.

8 | fav genre of music : classical music ( Beethoven, Einaudi and Chopin own my heart )

Lol this is very lengthy I'm sorry, btw congrats again!

I looked into MBTI, I looked into zodiacs, I went off of what you said

Here he is, the man, Seijoh’s do-it-all guy

HANAMAKI TAKAHIRO ur new boyfriend

There is not enough content for him, anyway

How You Met

Bear with me here

Think about this

Artist!hanamaki

You love painting? Art club.

Idk if youre actually in any art club but shhh

Anyway, it was probably some sort of community thing full of tons of different age artists (bc you’d have basketball or something after school and he had volleyball)

So like once a week on thursday afternoons everyone gets together and does all sorts of artsy stuff

Everyone listens to lo fi music (or you can bring headphones) and chit chat and just paint for a couple hours

Its in the back section of a library (bc the library near me does stuff like this its awesome) so if you want you can go read a book while you wait for things to dry

One day the person that ran it suggested you talked to the new guy

He was about your age, it was his first day, they didn't know what all he was good at, and tbh they thought you two would look cute together

Just the vibes yk

So you set up your canvas and stuff next to him and introduced yourself

And you guys just vibe to the playlist

He’s REALLY good

Compliments you a lot too

Which is fun because he’s cute so it makes you a little flustered

You find out you guys go to the same school and he’s on the VB team

And says he has a (practice) game that weekend and asks you to come if you can

Which you do

And they win! So its fun!

Matsukawa basically asks you out for him though

He’s heard all about you already

“You don't get it issei! She’s so pretty!! God, she touched my hand and I thought I was gonna die!!!!!” “the enthusiasm is new for you” “shut up asshole” (conversation from the night before)

So he walks up to you after the game and is like “Hey so,,, we’re going out to get some lunch, you wanna come?”

Makki thinks HES flirting with you and is pissed off about it

Until you all sit down for lunch and oh, the only open spot for him is next to you (since when is matsukawa willing to sit between iwaizumi and oikawa??)

He asked you out after art club that week (Mattsun threatened not to give him any more monster for the rest of the month if he didn't get the guts to do it)

General Headcanons

You date hanamaki, you're also dating matsukawa

There’s no separating them (good thing ur MBTIs work together too, especially for strong friendships)

This was literally my first thought

So

Good luck with both these trolls

More on that later

Of course he’s going to be worried if you go radio silent for a while, but he'll understand

There are some days he’s not gonna wanna talk either

He’s really supportive on your bad days of course

Expect a random text in the middle of the evening from him

“Hiya sweetheart, just wanted to remind you that you’re beautiful, I love you, and I hope your day is going well.”

When he’s having a bad day, the same thing is all he needs from you to keep moving

He’s a really honest person. If you want to talk to him, be prepared not to get any sugar coating. If you tell him to shut up because you don’t want advice, he will. But if you expect advice from him, expect brutally honest advice. Subtlety is not his strong suit, so when it comes to advice, he’s going to tell it like it is. He's just trying to help, yknow?

However, he’s pretty good with people, so will know how to comfort you when something is bothering you. Tea and cuddles? Gotcha. Dancing at 11pm because neither of you want to sleep yet? On it. You want him to hold you? Perfect.

He’s not like...the most touchy person? There are some things he’s really indifferent on, and other things he’s stubborn as hell with. Whatever you wanna do, though

His weakness though

⚠️this part is slightly little bit suggestive⚠️

He will randomly walk up to you and pull you against him, give you a really deep kiss, smirk and walk away like nothing happened

Like hands in hair probably almost making out and then just

Walk away

Because that’s how he kisses and it’s breathtaking every time

It’s either little temple kisses or forehead or cheek pecks or something

Or that

And probably leaves you flustered and it’s funny (to him) (and to me if I was there with you) (bc that would be funny)

Hmm I’m thinking

I’m thinking hair dye dates

He needs help doing his hair from time to time Y’know (he doesn’t he just likes spending time with you) and he wants to make it pink again

So he teaches you how to do his hair and even offers to dye yours one day

Either just a strand or the ends or everything, up to you

Imagine having twinning hair dye with makki isn’t that cute

I think it’s cute

I said ur platonically dating mattsun right

Yes you are now

He absolutely adores you and loves how much makki loves you

Probably would have asked you out if makki didn’t but he was really pushing for makki to because he was just all over you in the beginning

He wasn’t overly attached to you romantically so being friends? Perfect. Sounds great

You two get along wonderfully though like you act like siblings once you warm up to each other

Again, very brutally honest person, but a little more awkward so doesn’t know what he’s saying might come off as he’s acting like a dick

He doesn’t try to though and he does really care about you

Flat out told makki if he breaks up with you and breaks your heart he’s gonna kick his ass (makki doesn’t know he had the same (less aggressive) conversation with you)

Tbh all of the VBC at seijoh loves you

Oikawa loves talking to you he thinks you’re great for makki

Gets you in on he and makki and mattsun’s antics

Iwa thinks you’re good too he just doesn’t know you as well

I think that kunimi would like you (he was almost a runner up--)

Kindaichi too

The first years just think you’re cool even if they won’t say it out loud

Seijoh VBC loves you

You got mattsun’s approval

And hanamaki loves you with literally everything in his life

So

You’re pretty set with your strawberry baby huh

Date Night!

SLEEPOVERS

I was waiting for some matchup to come along that gave me sleepover vibes

In a perfect world where you could do sleepovers with your bf because most parents would,,,not let that happen

Imagine…

He shows up at like 7:00 after practice, pizza in hand because he picked up dinner

You two eat, chat about your day, he probably scarfs down half the pie bc it’s after practice ofc he’s hungry

So when you guys are done eating you head up to your room

And make pillow fort

It’s mandatory

Different design every time, but there’s a pillow fort nonetheless

And then when there’s just enough room for the both of you to climb in

You get a blanket and a couple pillows and one of your phones or laptops or whatever and watch a movie and cuddle

When the movie is over you guys break out the face masks

You ever wonder why he has such great skin? It’s thanks to you (or if you don’t have masks, he picks them up on the way home from practice)

But anyway you guys talk shit about people for a while and sit with the masks on (it’s usually him talking about how Oikawa is a bitch as much as he loves him) (or about whatever he and Mattsun were talking about lately)

You both get chances to vent while the masks sit on your face and you just vibe with music (usually that you pick) (he listens to like,,,meme songs and like CORPSE yk)

After masks you guys make/get some snacks and munch on those during another movie but this time you’re in comfy jammies and more relaxed Y’know

Less paying attention to the movie you’ve seen a million times and just vibing in each other’s presence and it’s just really sweet

Fall asleep on his chest

Let him fall asleep on yours

Either way, you’ve got him whipped for you he loves you

Not that he doesn’t already but that’s his favorite thing ever so please just let him do that

Always makes sure to tell you he loves you before you sleep too

If you fall asleep first he takes embarrassing pictures of you with your hair being a mess & you best bet he sends them to mattsun because “she’s so cute omfg” “dude” “dude what” “you’re so fuckin stupid” “?” “Whatever—good luck being whipped just tell me when you need to get a ring, k” “you’re such a jackass” “yeah yeah Gnight”

Zodiac/MBTI

Okay so I’m not doing a big long paragraph for all this BUT from what I understand, Gemini/Aquarius are really compatible, and ENTP and INFJ are known as “perfect matches” sO (I had a really hard time deciding between Atsumu and Makki because they're both ENTP)

Psst Gemini + Leo is compatible and so is INTP + INFJ,,,, so, again, asking you to marry me sho 💍💍

Aesthetic/Vibes

Playlist

Prelude and Fugue No. 1 in C major, BWV 846

Linus and Lucy by Vince Guaraldi Trio (meme song)

Sky Full Of Stars by The Piano Guys

Someone To You by The Piano Guys

Shut Up And Dance - Simply Three

Runners Up

Miya Atsumu, Tsukishima Kei

[nanasarea]

Park Jisung as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jisung x idol!reader

Requested

Word count:1757 (dear lord, the longest in the idol bf series damn...) 

a/n: this is more of a jisung as your bf in general, not so much the idol aspect sorry. Also yes, i ended up writing about jisung having a baby, sue me, I’m in jisung hours now! also do i even need to say it’s not proofread at this point?

Haechan /  Yuta / Mark / Jeno / Jaemin / Chenle / Renjun / Jaehyun

you were in the same dance class when you were younger

so you were friends way before either of your debuts

like when you knew each other when he was an smrookie

and of course, both of you being talented dancers

you were both training under companies at a rather young age

and it isn’t easy being a trainee regardless of your age

but because you were both still in school

and so young

you knew you should stick together

let’s say you had chemistry homework

but you also had vocal lessons

i’m not saying he would help you

because he wouldn’t

but he would be there to motivate you 

and study his own school work 

so you weren’t alone

it’s safe to say you were each other’s motivation when it came to school

he would also insist on his mom picking you up from school and driving you to the company when your mom couldn’t

same would go reversed

not that either of your moms minded

they found it adorable

and they shipped you both anyway so

that means him and his family coming over for dinner 

and you and yours going to theirs for dinner

and your moms would document all of your childhood memories

they would bond over it

since you didn’t have time to make any friends in school, 

you both valued your friendship a lot

he ended up debuting before you

and you teased him a lot

until he “taught” you how to ride a hoverboard

and you ended up falling in the first 4 seconds

then he would tease you

and you’d now understand how hard his dances really were

you met most of his members when they were smrookies

but you didn’t know renjun and chenle that well

so whenever you could, 

you would hang out with each other

and become very close

which is why they were all so supportive when you ran into their dorms and yelled that you were debuting 

you end up having a little celebration

when you actually did debut, 

they were so hyped

especially jisung

he streamed your mv so many times

he knew every detail of every scene in the mv

which was adorable

the fans knew you were childhood friends so they absolutely loved your interactions

which meant your company/companies being like 

WE COULD MAKE MONEY FROM THAT

so they make sure you have a collab stage 

like really early in your debut

and it was kinda awkward

but because you knew each other beforehand

you felt completely fine

at this point, your moms were betting on when you’d start dating

to which you would both just blush and tell them to stop

you end up going on so many variety shows together

mainly dance specials

and everyone finds you too adorable

like everyone ships it

but they’re kinda lowkey about it because they don’t want to make you uncomfortable 

not the case of his members tho

or yours

you can’t tell me jaemin’s hiatus wasn’t just him laying in bed, resting and planning your wedding

you can’t

taeyong ends up asking him why he hasn’t asked you out yet

he just blushes

it wasn’t until you were both a bit older

and you were at an award ceremony

where everyone was complimenting you

like your dress, makeup, hair, etc

that he realized he liked you

seeing you like that and realizing he needs to stop looking at you as his little childhood friend

and start looking at you as an adult

or somewhat of an adult

he can never look at you as an adult

because he would always have the image of you

with 6 empty chocolate milks around you

and a gummy worm hanging from your mouth

as you tried your best to color the coloring book correctly

but hey, you were always going to have the imagine of him

hanging from monkey bars

after he finished his 5th scoop of ice cream 

and laughing because he overheard someone say a fart joke

ANYWAY

he starts seeing you as an adult

kinda

and he gets slightly jealous when everyone compliments you

so after that, he goes to taeyong and jaehyun

and asks for dating advice

jaehyun just yells 

“wooooo! you should know my usual boba order by now, right, lee?”

These fuckers bet on how long it would take for jisung to realize his feelings 

and jaehyun would regrets only asking for a free boba when he won

but he’s way too happy about winning to care

it ends with half of 127 and half of dreamies giving advice, 

the other halves teasing

and wayv cooing on the phone as they were in china at the time

it takes him like 5 months till he confesses

he’s a nervous baby let him be

and when he does get the courage, 

he takes you to an amusement park

you don’t go on any of the rides

because he’s scared

but you do play the games and eat food

you even watch the fireworks

which is when he finally holds your hand for the first time

you did a lot of skinship before

like when you were friends

but it wasn’t like this 

it was cute

he was so nervous

your palms were both sweaty from nervousness

but neither of you cared

you were just happy to enjoy the moment

 that got cheesy

he even walked you to your dorm 

like to right in front of your door

which is when he hesitantly gave you a kiss on the cheek 

but you wanted a real kiss so you gave him a proper kiss

and he ended up almost tripping on his way to the elevator

where he smiled to himself

and tried to calm himself down

so the members wouldn’t see him like this

but they did

they teased him

and just yelled with him

“our baby had his first kiss!” -jaemin

“life is going way too fast! weren’t you like 3 years old yesterday?!”- jeno

“how come he’s 2 years younger and already getting more action than me?!” -renjun

the others find out 

and tease him

mostly they just congratulate him tho

“wooo! our baby is becoming a man!” -taeyong

“doyoung, hold me, i’m emotional!” -johnny 

“when’s the wedding?” -taeil

“wedding? i always cry at weddings...” -jungwoo

“no weddings! yet!” -kun

“yeah! he’s not getting married before me!” -jaehyun

they might have gone a bit overboard

but can you blame them 

it’s their baby we’re talking abt

they still see him as the little toddler from when he was on mickey mouse club

also you end up not telling your parents right away

and they keep match making

so you end up being like

“Mom, we’re already dating, you can stop”

cue both of your moms get excited

like they’re already talking about being the best grandmas

and having the cutest grandchildren

even tho you’ve only been together for 2 months

something tells me he’d be the type to want to have matching everything

phone cases

(probably anna and kristoff ones)

then profile pictures

jewelry

clothing

anything and everything

he’d find it so cute

speaking of matching profile pics

the fans would realize what was going on 

when you would match your pfps

so your company/companies were like

yes, they’re dating, no one is surprised...anyway 127 comeback 

your dating announcement is like super chill

mainly because everyone was waiting for it 

also i feel like he’d always be playing with your hair 

and fixing it

like all the time

a single hair out of place?

we can’t have that!

his hands are in your hair already

would text you for advice while filming chenji’s this and that

and would always make something for you too

“chenle’s turned out more aesthetic but mine is made with love, so mine is better my default.” 

also it wouldn’t matter if you’re older than him, the same age, younger than him

doesn’t matter

would want to hear you call him oppa

but immediately get shy after

also he’s an aquarius

so if you end up getting really random texts during the day

like during your schedules

don’t be surprised

like he’s already maknae on top

so he will rebel to like some of the things you say

“jisung! we need to get back to filming in 3 minutes!”

“but weeee!” -jisung going down the slide for the 5th time 

cries when you joke about leaving him there

speaking of crying, 

we all know he’s emotional

and cries easily

so he just runs to you whenever he wants to cry

and just placed his head on your shoulder

to hide his facial expression

but it’s okay

you’ve already seen everything from the random snaps you get every day

he might not know how to comfort you at first

but he will learn

and he’s pretty mature for his age 

so he would take comforting you very seriously

he’s a really good listener 

so he would love to just hear you vent to him

it would kinda boost his ego a bit too

like he’s the one who you’re venting to

yknow what i mean?

but also he protects you very well

you get scared of a spider 

he goes all manly mode 

and gets rid of it for you

doesn’t like to admit it, 

but he thinks about you a lot

and your future

like once you two grow out of your idol lives 

and into a more adult life

where you get married

and have kids

kids who tease their uncles (aka nct members)

because THE maknae on top was their teacher after all

speaking of weddings

his older brother got married

and obviously you were his date

and everyone kept looking at you two

asking when it was your turn

your mom said “hopefully soon”

“mom, we don’t have time, we have busy schedules”

“but one day...”

time jump to when the news breaks about your engagement 

and everyone is crying

they watched you both grow up and now you’re getting married??

what???

the announcement was everywhere

also you don’t announce anything about a child

one day, you just both post a picture of your daughter

with a caption like

“she’s so cute, i knew my genes were good.”

or something like that

and everyone goes wild

nation’s babies having a baby?

legend says chenle’s screaming caused 2 earthquakes that day

to sum it up: nation’s babies turned nation’s it couple because jisung is the best boyfriend you could ever have asked for 

.....i might have gone way more invested than i thought i was going to. Do i regret it tho? hell no. Am i emotional now because I pictured adult Jisung with a baby? hell yes.

tag list: @soleilchannie​

[zirkkun]

I can't sleep so I'm gonna ramble for a minute here about. uh. 2020 i guess lol everyone else is so might as well jump on the bandwagon.

Be aware this is really really fucking long so it's a commitment to read it lmao sorry i just cannot sleep and i guess i had more on my mind about this year than i thought. I also did not proofread this at all. I just started writing and didn't look back lol

This year was... Weird for me. It started out with me feeling my best in January, comfortable and positive as I did my nth playthrough of DBH with friends and finally having enough alts of my boy Alfonse in FEH to have a team of Just him to fight with. (Priorities, right?) February hit, and things were still going good. I met Ray Chase and had him sign a print I did of Roy and Alfonse in some casual outfits for a scrapped au I wrote years ago. (And I gave him one 😊). Hell, like, covid was just coming around when me and my friends went to the con that weekend and a breakout of it hit the city just south of where the con was like a week before, but I was genuinely so excited for it that like I was like "Yeah, if i die, i die. Whatever happens happens." God, at this point, the Alfonse gc I was in was still alive and I still didn't talk to anyone in the group outside of that gc. Lowkey miss it tbh. But oh well. Things move on.

But that con was like... Stressful. I usually have fair amounts of stress at cons, being around so many people, I fear theft, unwanted contact, y'know, the standard; but my friend group was so filled with tension that it was absolutely painful. We'd been split most of the weekend, and if the two groups came together, it was hell, because it just caused unwanted arguments. I felt really bad cause I didn't want them to be upset, yknow? But i also wanted to hang out with my friends all at once. So i swapped between the groups a bit over the weekend. And blew WAY more money than I should have and lowkey it kind of fucked me over for the rest of the year cause I haven't had a job all year outside of, like, a local church job that pays at a rare max of $100 a month ;w;

I'd been struggling in school the previous semester already, about halfway through having just stopped going to classes altogether, yet still somehow managed to pass everything with B's and A's. The next semester rolled around, and I thought at first the distraction and inability to do anything was because of the con, and as it persisted after, I thought it was just post-con depression. But, as it turned out, no, it's just been my biggest relapse of depression since the end of high school, and frankly, it's only gotten worse since. I can't sleep rn because I'm between not wanting to do anything because I have a lack of emotions and motivation and not feeling deserving of sleep lol. I checked out of school on February 28th, however, I was convinced I was merely demotivated by my surroundings -- at this point, I was studying Japanese, and one of my friends at the time was a (although probably unintentionally) complete braggart about how much he was studying and how he was improving... not to mention he was textbook example of "This is an Actual Weeaboo, don't Fucking Do this." (One of many reasons i said friend at the time lol) it was just... So draining being around him, and I had to see him in class every day of the week. I barely scraped together assignments last-minute and never studied under the idea of "What does it matter if I'm not putting in my 100%?" So I checked out, with plans of transferring for the following semester.

Well, then March hit. Y'all know how March went down lmao.

I pretty much locked myself in my room at all times during March, going between Animal Crossing and BOTW (which actually racked up like 200ish hours i think according to the nintendo year in review i had lmao). I started making a bit closer online friends at this point, notably @levitumbling who decided to take me in as his channel designer for YouTube and I've been ever since! But. Of course. My first task? A Sans meme. My payment? One Switch copy of Undertale because he considered it a disgrace that I'd never played the game before.

Now, let me tell you. I was fuckin scared to play this game. I held onto it for weeks between the fear of "My friend bought me this and i should play this" and "I told myself I'd never touch this game with a 20 mile pole because of how much it's been shoved down my throat over the years." So, one day, I don't remember when, early April, I said, fuck it, I'll play it for a little bit, just enough to say "hey i played it for a bit!" and then never go back.

The only thing that stopped me from beating the whole thing in one sitting was it was the crack of dawn when I passed out, extremely tired and extremely frustrated by the fact I couldn't beat Muffet. Yes, I got that far in one sitting I intended to play for 15 minutes tops.

Now. Let me fuckin tell you. About my first playthrough of Undertale. I haven't gone into a game knowing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about it like... I think ever. Usually I know what style of game it is, the genre, the main plot premise. I knew nothing other than the existence of Sans (and, as it turned out, I'd heard some of the soundtrack pieces before, notably Bonetrousle I heard this cover of it in a radio livestream a while back and never really looked it up, but was always excited when the radio looped back around to it being on; and I'd heard Dating Start! because that's Alpharad's go-to sponsorship ost lmao.) But anyway. I was completely in the dark. Do yall mind if i just go through some highlights of my favorite memories? This is supposed to be a summary of the year but I mean, I think this made a big enough impact on me to really like. Discuss it a bit.

I watched the whole opening cutscene, started a new game under my old screenname, "Yoru," since in naming the "Fallen Child," I assumed they were dead. Well, I was a little surprised to just be that child, alive, two seconds later, but whatever, I rolled with it.

I genuinely trusted Flowey right away. Like no shit. He told me run into the "friendliness pellets" and I didn't even fucking question it. And when Toriel came in? And she said to follow her? I straight up was like "Why the hell should I trust you?? That guy just tried to kill me what says you wont?" I followed only because the game made me but i was Wary the whole time. It took me a LONG time to warm up to Toriel.

Now. Let me tell you how stupid I am as well. The game says over and over right, "Don't fight. Spare. Have Mercy when names are Yellow." Well, I took this literally. I didn't understand the Act mechanic most of the time, and when something didn't work I just said, fuck it, and fought them. If their name didn't turn yellow, I just fought them. "They don't want Mercy if their name isn't yellow, right?" After a while, I'd started getting bored of fighting and would just run away, but like, I came to a point where I was like "I have a really low level, I'm really going to regret this later on if I don't grind for a while."

I don't know when I stopped but. I think I was only one or two kills away from a genocide run accidentally my first playthrough, based on how I think I was LV 3 and looking at genocide playthroughs, you're LV 3 or 4 when you fight Toriel. Like. Holy fuck. I can't imagine what I would have thought of this game if that happened lmao.

Speaking of Toriel, still didn't trust her, at all. When we got to Home, and after I did Every Single different phrase she says when you go downstairs before you talk to her reading about snails; I did not Hesitate to ask "cool uh when the fuck can I leave?" When we got to the Ruins exit I was like, ah, here it is. The betrayal from her I was expecting, where she tries to kill me. Well, nothing on the Act menu worked, right? So... I fought and killed her. I didn't really care, actually. I just kept going.

Then meeting Sans and Papyrus happened. I lost my fucking shit at this part, mostly when they were talking, because every time Sans made a pun it would zoom in on him and do a rimshot. The puns were not funny and I was definitely on Pap's side of "oh my GOD shut up." But that fucking zoom in and rimshot was just so fourth wall breaking and unexpected. Fuck, it still gets me. Anyway. Game continues. I again lose my shit at (insane spinning in random directions) "OH MY GOD! IS THAT A HUMAN?" "uh, i think that's a rock." "OH. WAIT! WHAT'S THAT IN FRONT OF THE ROCK?? (IS IT A HUMAN??)" "(yes.)" "OH MY GOD!!!" and still think these two moments in the game are Peak comedy. Oh, and let me tell you, I did not like either of these two at this point. Sans I was like, okay, hes kind of a dumbass in a funny way, but Papyrus is a dumbass in a way that just annoys me. Genuinely the archetype that misses social cues and therefore has miscommunication usually just annoys me to no end. (Mostly for the miscommunication. It's my least favorite trope and makes me unreasonably angry.) But yeah. Wasn't really a fan. But out of everyone so far? Definitely found Sans to be the most tolerable. But that's about all I thought of him lmao.

Getting to Snowdin, with the Papyrus battle, remember how I said I didn't like Papyrus? And yes, this was something I genuinely thought at one point, I genuinely hated Papyrus, imagine that. What a wild world that is. But anyway. You know how his Act menu has the "Flirt" option? I, for no reason, gunned it for the Flirt option, even though I did not want to. Then when he was like "WE'LL GO ON A DATE! LATER!!" i was like yea sure okay lmao. Again, couldn't figure out the Act menu to turn his name yellow, so I fought him, and he was one or two attacks from dying (miraculously) when he ended the battle. I spared him here cause, well, he spared me, it was only fair. Then this guy again is like "ILL BE AT MY HOUSE WHEN YOU WANT TO GO ON THAT DATE!" and i was like haha funny but still turned around to go on the date. Like why? I have no idea. I think I was more like "haha hes probably not gonna be there and its just cause i picked that option and lo and behold there was an actual fucking date. Oh my god. I have never in my life been on a video game date where one party was convinced I was infatuated with them and im here on the other side of the screen like "oh my god make this end i can't stand being around you.???" But still. The date was. Really fucking funny. I wish I could experience it for the first time again like holy shit. There are few playthroughs I did after this where I didn't go on the Pap date, even if I just spedrun through it.

So then you get to Waterfall and Sans is there like "hey wanna go to grillbys" and i was like sure why not so we go there and my choices were fries & ketchup (so i did not get the legendary scene where he chugged a bottle of ketchup, but i sure did my second playthrough, and let me tell you, i was disgusted). But like. This whole experience at grillby's like, the whoopee cushion, him using a comb on his bald ass skull, him just fuckin unapologetically scratching his ass for no reason?? Bro i was like "why the fuck is this guy part of the Tumblr Sexymen™ group ??? He's so ????? Gross???????" and like i still have this question tbh lmao. But like. Okay so he asks you "what do you think of my bro?" And my genuine answer was "uncool" and he was like "hey man sarcasm isnt funny" and can i just mention how like inheritly manipulative sans actually is like fuck he does things like this where he throws your answer the other way a few times and Every time it actually swayed me the other way. Because right here I went. "Oh. Maybe Papyrus is better than I thought." Like holy fuck maybe i should be more aware if something like that can sway my opinion so easily LMAO.

Anyway waterfall i genuinely was very bored of the whole time. I spent like a genuine 20 minutes figuring out the puzzle where you have to talk to a wall and I actually didn't realize you could move the telescope around. What helped me solve it is my friend's advice before I played it. "Inspect everything. Even talk to walls. Trust me." And literally thats how I solved it. But pretty much everything in Waterfall otherwise bored me. I did think it was pretty though, and did enjoy reading the lore, but when it started talking about monster biology my one fear had been realized: oh god, oh fuck. My original species for my own series also has physical Souls and die by turning to dust because they're made entirely of magic. God fuck. My luck, it has to be something popular, so now everyone's gonna think I'm a ripoff. But, at the same time, I do think it helped me understand monster biology (and it helped me come up with the ULR biology) better, because I've put in a lot of thought to existence of a species that exists only by magic and a Soul (which, mine only actually have half a Soul, as a full Soul makes a being immortal, which was also similar to the boss monsters in a way). It definitely made a lot more sense for like, the skeletons n stuff for me, because like my characters are wholly shapeshifters but usually take human form, and while they have "organs" in the places humans would have them, they don't operate. They're just placeholders, because they just live with their Soul. So I've always thought the same with UT monsters, since the skelebros can live without organs, that means so do the rest of the monsters, even if they have animal-like appearances.

Off topic lmao. Back to UT. So, the Undyne fight was kind of the turning point for me. She was pissing me off so much during this whole game and like I was like "if theres another fucking part where I have to run away from her im going to scream." Well, once again, her name wasn't yellow, so I wasn't going to spare her... and, actively, I made the decision to kill her, because I didn't want to deal with her still chasing me later on in the game. It took me a long time to beat her, and when I did, I texted my friend (@cheshiregrinnbuttoneyes ) in excitment like "YES I FINALLY KILLED UNDYNE" and she texted back like "YOU DID WHAT?????" and i was like "i.... Killed Undyne????" she replies, "YOU DONT HAVE TO OMFG WHY" and im like "I DIDN'T HAVE TO?? THERE'S OTHER OPTIONS?????" and shes like "YES OMFG THAT'S LITERALLY THE PREMISE OF THE GAME" and im "WHAT."

So then. I get that call from Papyrus like. "HEY! YOU ME AND UNDYNE SHOULD HANG OUT SOMETIME!"

oh my god the guilt i felt.

alphys on undernet being like "omfg i forgot to watch undyne fight the human. ah ill ask her about it later she never loses <3"

bro. i nearly fuckin cried. i was like. Not to mention I'd gotten the crush question right for Mettaton's quiz in answering Undyne (bc i was like "plz be gay plz be gay") so it fucking cut like a knife what I'd done.

I don't remember when I let myself get passed it. But I do know that the whole story arc between Alphys and Mettaton went way over my head. Like, i know im probs the minority on this, but I adore Alphys, I have since I first met her in game, and like, when Mettaton was like "ALPHYS HAS BEEN LYING TO YOU!" i just went "...nah."

Also, I didnt like mettaton at this point, cause I thought he was being really obnoxious, and then the turn around to betray Alphys really kinda pissed me off.

But like.

Oh my god.

Remember how I said I swapped my opinion on Pap earlier bc of Sans's comment? Yeah that was a pretty fast turnaround, but it still took me a few times.

But the second i saw mettaton ex

I was like

"HIM. HE. HE'S THE ONE I LOVE."

Like, full turnaround from Undyne, I actively refused to kill him. All times I thought he was an asshole? Forgotten. Me thinking he's a selfish prick? Gone. Nada. Nothing. Pure adoration. Suddenly every flaw he had was pushed aside purely from how hot I thought he was. Also, fuckin, im really glad i played this when no one in my house was awake, because I still didn't understand the Act mechanic here, and every time you attack mettaton he has this like moan he does and im like oh my god. stop. omfg.

At the end, too, when there was the calls and everything, when he had his big turnaround, I was just so happy for him I genuinely cried. Also, I had to do his battle probably the most out of everyone's in the game (not including genocide), so when it came around to his battle during the (glitchless) speedruns i did, i was more invested in how fast I could rack up points, cause you need 10k rating points to pass, and I actually did get that before he lost his legs, but apparently he needed to lose those too before you passed lol. Unfortunate.

Anyway after Alphys talked to you and everything, i genuinely went to see if Mettaton was still there, but he wasn't :( so i just went to New Home. I was very ill prepared for the fight against Asgore and the only reason I struggled with it so much was because my only healing items were like. Something that healed like 10 or 12 hp and the snowman piece. I was LV 9 when i finished the game, so like, my HP was pretty high, but i didnt have the G to buy items, so i was pretty much fucked. Yes. I had to eat the snowman to win.

Oh speaking of terrifying shit though. Photoshop flowey? My god. I haven't been afraid of a video game boss so much since I was a little kid. It was like 3 am and i was not prepared for him to just delete my save file and then kill me on repeat, glitching and breaking everything as he pleased. Bruh i was genuinely scared. Like, not even just, "oh yikes :(" or something. Like, crying scared. Lmao im an emotional bitch by nature.

I of course had to restart from the beginning again to get the True Pacifist ending. I was very careful to never touch the Fight button literally ever. And, it actually took me a while to reset, because I hate erasing my original save files, yknow? But, well, as it turned out? While technically New Game+ by naming, resetting doesn't erase everything you did. It wasn't a new file. I was a little confused at first to be honest. Toriel saying things were familiar, remembering things I said, Papyrus and Undyne both recognizing me, like. It was unnerving.

When I got to the end, i had to look up how to get Alphys's date (since my friend told me the way to unlock TP was to go on all the dates, but Alphys's was definitely designed in mind of you turning around from New Home and going back to talk to people rather than a new reset. So after unlocking it, getting through Alphys's date (i still remember being like, verbally, "omg alphys you look so nice??" When she came out with the dress on and then had a thought to myself like... since when do i care about what people look like? since when do i compliment people? At that point, while I didn't consider myself to be a rude person, I definitely wasn't exactly all that concerned about others for anything. Sure, I cared about others' lives, but I tended to be a bit more judgemental internally, and just. Didn't really give a fuck about what people did in the most negative sense possible, unless it involved me. Yet, it rolled off my tongue like it was something id say normally to anyone. I really wonder if this is the true turning point for me this year.)

Getting to the end, with everyone cheering me on. Hoo boy. This was the start of many tears to come. Papyrus's "DO WHAT I WOULD DO! BELIEVE IN YOU!!" sticks with me the most. I wasn't surprised by Flowey's actions, but what fucking threw me for a loop was like. When Flowey was revealed as Asriel, I was genuinely jaw-drop shocked. I was like. Holy fuck. I thought he was dead. What the hell. To this day, though, i still think Hopes and Dreams hits me the hardest out of all the boss battle themes. It doesn't super bother me, bc like, difference in opinion is whatever, but like. Whenever I see Megalovania at the top of someone's ost list for Undertale I'm just... Why? Maybe it's because I'd overheard it meme'd to much before I played the game, but like, i dunno, it's not a bad song, but it's not the most emotional provoking piece for me, so it's pretty far down my list. Hopes and Dreams will still remain my #1.

I really did feel determined during this battle. I really felt a lot of emotion. I felt excited. I felt frightened. I felt ambitious. Asriel's battle is probably still the hardest for me, and yes, I'm counting genocide this time. I can't grasp his magic patterns at all, and I more so played it as a "okay, how much damage can i take? Whats his next move?" As i healed every other turn. It took me a very long time to beat him (though no 11 hours like Sans, this was more like, 2 or 3 max) and when I got to the part with the Lost Souls, most of the characters just said their "we hate you" piece and i was like "nope you're controlled" right.

But then there's Sans's "just give up. i did."

I genuinely had to stop. I set down my controller and just sat for a minute. I'd mentioned before how much I've been struggling with depression for years now, and it's at the worst it's been since high school. Maybe you'd think when I saw that, I was like "sure, maybe I should give up." But... It's really the "i did." that hit me like a rock to the stomach. While I do know a couple other people with depression, the most discussion we have with it is "haha i wanna die" kinda jokes yknow? Nothing really serious. And, well, I've always been the type to lean to fictional characters for support more than real people, since I've just been so disconnected from a lot of friends growing up and was too scared to talk about anything with my family.

So seeing someone else say "just give up. i did." hit me so fucking hard that I just started crying. I had already been in a real sappy mood cause the whole scene was so emotional as it was, even if merely the cliche of friendship will save all, y'know what? Its a good ass fuckin trope and makes me emotional lmao.

So, naturally, I was more hyperaware of Sans's implied depression from here onward. The conversations with everyone post-battle left me crying. God, so did the hug with Asriel. I was just fucking bawling.

Oh god. I didn't even mention. "Despite everything, it's still you." Another line that just hit me and I had to pause.

So admist my crying mess, I was telling my friend I'd beat Undertale again. He asks me "so... you gonna play the genocide route?" And I already had from the beginning. I always want to play every available route in a game. I see no point in paying for something and then not playing it all. I'd consider myself a completionist who doesn't ever actually finish anything lmao.

I definitely put my emotions aside for genocide. The absolute hardest kill for me was Papyrus, though. And i was absolutely fucking heartbroken when he said he still believed me as his last words. But I forced it aside. I didn't want to reset. I wanted to beat it to have it under my belt that I had. I was pretty sure the Sans battle would be here, since I hadn't heard Megalovania in the game yet, and I was aware of how hard the battle was, despite never seeing it.

Undyne's battle I'm more emotional about in retrospect than I was at the time. At the time, I didn't care, didn't like the theme much, and the dings gave me a headache. Undyne isn't exactly my favorite character (though definitely not my least favorite, that role is given to Frisk with Toriel not close behind ahdhsb im sorry), so I really wasn't concerned about it. Not to mention, I don't know why, but all of the battles I struggled with EXCEPT Undyne's I ended up liking the character more as a result. Maybe it was the dinging lmao.

Bro you shoulda seen how prepared I was for Mettaton NEO's battle to be hard as fuck. I was like sitting upright, took deep breaths before hitting fight, then when he died in one shot i just kind of "wh...what." Still very disappointed lol but I guess that's kind of the point of the genocide route.

Then came the Sans fight. As I said, I spent 11 hours on this. I genuinely didn't pay attention to what he said after a while, but I do remember the first time I read it, I was fucking terrified. Usually, sarcasm, hatred, and sass is very hard to convey through pure text, especially when it's said in the same tone as his usual talking. But the absolute harshness, the coldness, and the lack of any fucks given Sans had at that point was so plainly transparent through everything he said that it fucking scared me. Toby Fox's writing here was fantastic. I can only dream of being able to write like that. Frankly, I love his writing in general. Actually, fuck it, I love all of the artistic takes of this game. This is gonna sound weird but... The "childishness" of it just is so good. Like, there's no rules. Every socially accepted rule of art, writing, character design, speech patterns, and even basic grammar are thrown aside. He didn't just think outside of the box, there literally was no box. I call it childish only because like, children also create with no rules. They have no rules to restrict their creativity. And seeing that embraced in Undertale in every form possible just blows me away.

Anyway. The battle. It. Was hard. Thats a given. I spent about two weeks playing it on and off, and it's probably the most healthily I've treated myself in recent memory, because when it became too much for me to handle, I set it down and took a break. I would retain what I memorized and use it for the next time I picked it up. Frankly, it came to a point where every time I opened up Undertale to play, it was more just cause I wanted to see him lmao. The guy hated my existence at this point and it's not like i disacknowledged that. But it just felt like every time i opened the game... Idk. I don't know what I felt. I can tell you for sure this isn't the time when Sans started slipping into my favorite character spot over Mettaton, that didn't come until the development of Act to Flirt's first demo, which was a month or so later lmao.

I was very excited when I beat Sans.

But then, after it was over, I felt very empty.

I didn't feel good about beating genocide. I still don't. I want to play the boss battles again, cause they were really fun, despite how hard they were, but I can't bring myself to.

When I got to Chara, and everything went to black, I just wiped my save and started fresh. I think this was the first time I used the name "Willo" for anything. I just picked a random name to use, and Willo was the first thing that came to mind.

I beat neutral again many times, trying to unlock as many secrets as I could. I accidentally spent like, way too long trying to get Sans's room, because I couldn't figure out how to do it... which is when I started speedrunning the game, because I was just so used to going through it all. I timed myself once, and I got somewhere around 1:20:00 ish, which puts me at the very bottom of the NG+ Glitchless runs by like 30 minutes, but hey, it's still not too bad all things considered.

I'd started working on Act to Flirt sometime in between the speedruns. I was playing Papyrus's date again, and I had this thought of. What if Undertale... but all boss fights are instead like Papyrus's date?? I pitched the idea to my friend who was like "thats definitely been done before lol" and immediately I almost shut down the idea. But then I still had that glimmer of hope that, maybe, since I haven't made it yet, people would like my game because it was by me. Besides, quarantine was getting to me. I needed some way to spend my time. So on May 6th to May 7th, I spent the whole 24 hour period making the first proof of concept for the game, which was UI setup and Flowey's tutorial date. I hadn't made any of the art yet, so it was a black background with Flowey's undertale sprite. I originally was going to make everything more visual novel like in the sense that, so like on Papyrus's date, you could make choices like "unwrap the present" "dont unwrap the present" or "you look great" "you look terrible" and getting the ending would involve pretty much just saying the right things at the right times. But this alone was... Yknow, already done before, and part of what makes Undertale so great is that it's, despite its many outside influences, very unique in its gameplay. So I decided to make the dates more like puzzle-solving RPG's, and frankly, since doing that, I dont know if I want to go back to making other visual novels lmao.

After making the first demo and releasing it, I hit a creative funk. I wanted to make the next demo right away, but I forced myself to stop (since i was working 16+ hour days to finish it in exactly a week. I didn't eat much and i slept very little during this time too. Dont do this lmao). I didn't know if the game would be received, and frankly, I'd had many failed projects in the past due to lack of support. I lost a lot of support in the past due to the dropped projects I kept starting and quitting because I had such a small audience, and that made me lose a lot of interest and motivation to work on them. So I posted the first demo and waited. I was very shocked to have a YouTuber with over a million subs play it that weekend. Dantekris I think was her channel name. She speaks Russian, and I never understood a word she said, but I've still watched her let's plays because I enjoy seeing her reactions. I hate that YouTube keeps deleting my responses on her videos, probably because they're long and in English so it's marked as spam on a comments section full of purely Russian comments yknow. But it makes me feel like such an ass ;w;

Mairusu is the next large YouTuber who played it and my god I love seeing when he uploads a new update for my game because I genuinely have no idea what to expect from him. I don't know what it is but he's just so absolutely funny to me. He also seems to be the most common breaker of my game though. Stop making your own bugs!! I try to testplay to find the bugs he gets and it's like.... what did you do.... how did you skip that whole date im so confused thats not supposed to happen..... He accidentally skipped all of Muffet's date because of this too and hers is supposed to be the hardest in the game right now so I'm very upset by it;; i dont know how it happened, it never happens for me.

But like. I was definitely struggling a bit with the direction I wanted to take AtF. I wanted there to be a core message, like with Undertale and many other of my favorite things. When there's a core theme to write about, it makes things a lot easier to compose than if you have a plot with no meaning to it. It ties it all together for a common purpose. But, as I started diving more into the fandom around this time, finding not only it being still alive but still enormous and filled with passion.

Passion. Hm. That's familiar. That's the trait I gave the player character, rather than determination. While it was intended for giggles "haha dating game u have passion wink wonk," it started becoming more than that. It started becoming a manifestation of what I really felt upon finally soaking myself into the deep end of this pool I'd once been too afraid to step into. Passion. Everyone here is so driven by their passion for this game, the characters, its story. Everyone is so inspired and creative. That's it. That's what I wanted Act to Flirt to be.

A game made for those who have already dived deep into Undertale. A game made for those who have the same level if passion I've wittnessed. A game that someone might stumble upon, merely wanting any Undertale content they can find, and a dating sim leaves them grasping at straws, only to find it's a game instead deeply rooted in how much they care about this world and its people. You have a Soul of Passion, because your passion for Undertale brought you to this game. That's what the core message is. Every ending is supposed to depict different kinds of empathy, and True Passion shows you truly cared the most you could for all of these characters. Sans is so blocked from it because, well, how can he really believe it? "if we're really friends, you won't come back," right? But here you are. Again and again.

And Heartbreak. Whose heart is really the one breaking here? Taking the Hopes and Dreams of every single character you've grown to care for and crushing it beneath your feet... who is the one suffering in the end?

I just... I'm very excited. I've written that game with the player as the main character. Not Willo. Not Frisk. Not anybody else. You, the player, are the main character. I've honestly done a lot of looking around in the DDLC code to make this game as 4th wall breaking as I can (without like. Disrupting it as a game experience like ddlc is, with monika deleting things and stuff). Just enough to leave the player unsettled and confused. Like. "Me? Are you talking to me?" Yes. You. Directly to you.

I started sketching out designs and ideas for ULR around July. I genuinely loved Underlust after finding out about it, even though it was posed to me as an insult about the contents of Act to Flirt. I was both like "uh... Act to Flirt is nothing like this. Maybe in reversed roles at best but..." and also "okay but this? This shit is good. Thank you." But finding out it was discontinued and wanting more, well, that's when I decided to make ULR. I presented the idea to my friends, who were like "please stop making aus," and then continued onward. I told myself I wasn't going to work on it though until after I finished Act to Flirt... Then after the next demo came out... Then it turned out I was working on it too much and it resulted in me rushing my release of the 3rd demo of AtF because I'd been so distracted I was going to miss my release deadline of the end of August, before school. I... Still kinda regret that a lot. It's still very buggy. Though I hope I got them all for the next demo...

But speaking of school .... ha... Remember when i said i was going to transfer to another school? Well, I did, and for the first few weeks it was fine! Then I started skipping assignments I didn't want to do. Then I started panicking about my low grades. Then I started getting behind on assignments. Then I stopped going to classes. Then I lost all motivation to work on anything at all. I just locked myself in my room and did next to nothing with the occasional drawing here and there, for weeks. It came to the point where I was like "I just have to get through this semester, then I'll drop out." But if I ever wanted to go back to school, having all F's on my last report card would not bode well for my acceptance. Which lead to more stress. I didn't want to fail, but I also didn't have any motivation to work. I would do one assignment here or there, feel good about myself, then realize I was still months behind on work and suddenly oh god oh fuck finals are next week. And my solution? I just. Fuckin dropped out. Oh my god. It was such a relief to just get that weight off my shoulders that I'd been carrying for months on end, preventing me to do anything I wanted to work on.

Well. Then my car tires died. So that's a thing. But good news! Between commissions and gifts, I have enough money to get them replaced! I don't think I've ever like... Been so excited about that before.

And, well. Now I'm here, pretty much. God, I just went through my entire year summary, and it feels like it was both forever long but also not long at all. I don't get it. 2021 still feels like a far off future, despite the fact I'm now 5 hours into it. Yes, I spent 4 hours writing this. Whoops. Oh well. I couldn't sleep anyway, so it's not that big of a deal.

All in all though... Despite being locked inside, away from my friends, unable to talk to anyone about the things i was enjoying, and living in fear of getting sick at all ever with anything, 2020 definitely fuckin changed me for the better. It was a hellhole of a year and I'd never do it again or wish it upon my worst enemy, but I came out a better person... I think. I hope.

It seems cliche to bring back but fuck it. Undertale? My friend insists its core message was that anyone can be a good person if they just try, which I mean, it definitely probably was intended that way. But that never was the message I felt while playing it.

What lesson I took from it was "things aren't always as they seem."

Flowey betrays you immediately, but then you find out he's just the remnants of a boy who died years ago and is still grieving over the loss of his best friend, whomst, despite how much he cares for them, recognizes they weren't good to him and he'd been manipulated and used by them.

Toriel is a kind and caring woman, a still grieving mother over the loss of her children, who seems to have kindness to no end, but is actually filled with such hatred and depression that she regularly gets drunk, swears, and still, without resilience, hates her ex husband.

Sans is a playful character who is full of puns, a gross atmosphere, and decided to break physics just because he can. He's the embodiment of a comic relief character. But at the same time, he's suffering, struggling, in constant pain and worry. He's lazy, but quick on his feet. He's harmless but will kill without hesitation if need be. He's both caring and the least caring of them all.

Papyrus is like... a self-centered asshole in a way, when you first meet him. He prides himself and everything he does. Yet still, he's actually quite open and accepting and loves everyone. He loves talking with and being with other people, even if maybe sometimes he has a different interpretation of social interaction from the "norm."

Undyne comes off as cruel and deadly, such even being emphasized in many points. But, deep down, she's extremely caring for those who are close to her, and her only cruelty is dealt to those who have wronged her in some way.

Alphys is a sweet and nervous wreck who comes off as helpful and lacking a filter due to her tendency to ramble. She seems to be merely anxious due to likely social anxiety... But you eventually find out that she's a liar who merely wants to create a world to be a better place, and by doing so, she pretends all the bads do not exist.

Mettaton comes off as an absolute self-centered asshole. Like. There's no way around that. He seemingly has no regard for other people with only full intentions of helping himself. But, deep down, he actually cares a lot for other people, especially his family and friends, and just tends to get caught up in things while he's in the moment.

Muffet seems to be greedy with how much money she begs people to give her for the spiders, but, as it turns out, she's flat broke and drops no G when you beat or kill her. She merely needs the money to help the spiders.

Asgore, too, is built up to be this ruthless killer throughout the whole game, and when you finally meet him, he's an incredibly sweet guy who's only filled with regret, and because of his past decisions, has decided to put aside his hopes for the sake of his people.

I...

Didn't see any of these characters for who they really were right away. Why would I? Few of these archetypes are explored much in a lot of fiction lately, or at least what I've been consuming; and is more focused around how someone can change their flaws into something positive... Not how to accept someone for who they are, despite the wrongs they may have committed or the lives they lead. Everyone's different. Everyone's grown up differently. Everyone has a reason for what they do.

And it took me playing this game to realize such a simple concept that I probably should have learned years ago.

That's why I really think 2020 changed me for the better. I made a realization that I should have had many years ago, and it's made me a lot more confident in expressing myself, accepting people for what they do, and seeing the brighter side to everything. I say that, sitting here filled with nothing and void of all emotion whatsoever... But it's a conscious thought i have. My emotions are so weird... They're either on full blast or I feel nothing at all. But yet I have... Thoughts of what i should feel? It's weird. Idk. This is why I'm getting therapy LMAO

But yea. 2020? Fuck you. But also thank you. But mostly fuck you and good riddance lmao

[sunnnfish]

Rambling about tbhk thoughts & theories n stuff

Hi I’m thinking too much about how much is still unanswered in tbhk :) this is all over the place but i tried to organize it a little bit but it is very very ramble-y and it might not make much sense. Please feel free to talk to me i have so many thoughts (but also not many answers)

I also bolded some of my favorite thoughts for maybe easier reading

(Also crazy spoilers about literally everything watch out)

Gonna put it all under a cut bc its long but please read 🥺 i talk about like straight up everything and everyone (tsukasa, Sakura, natsuhiko, amane, tsukasa, nene, kou, mitsuba + what is going on with them)

Tsukasa, Sakura, natsuhiko:

Okay so like why did tsukasa only recently appear after supposedly being dead for like 50 years cause like hanakos been around yknow ? Does it have something to do with the seal? Cause like tsukasa is clearly very clingy to hanako so you’d think he’d stick by him as soon as they died but they apparently hadn’t seen each other in a long time. and how did Sakura get into like a contract or whatever with him ? and why can natsuhiko see and interact with supernaturals ? Natsuhiko is so weird what is his deal. why in the world does he know how to turn into a supernatural ???

GASP i just had a thought so like tsukasa says he only grants wishes for the dead so like how would Sakura get into some kind of deal with him if she’s alive? She could be dead but idk it kinda does and kinda doesn’t work.

Hanako, tsukasa, seals:

And as for hanako and tsukasa like when did they get those seals and why ??? And like during the part where kou asks yako about rumors being changed hanako at the end like touches the seal on his cheek and ?????? What does that MEAN ??? Did he have to get sealed because his rumor was changed ? Like what was that about ??? Also why in the world are hanako and tsukasa so powerful? They are so strong and its crazy. Also I REALLY wanna know what hanakos boundary and yorishiro are and what purpose his boundary serves.

Tsukasa, plans, rumors:

Also why is tsukasa changing the rumors ? Is he trying to like kill the 7 wonders or what ? Or remove them from power cause like yknow breaking their yorishiros removes their control over the boundary and like he did straight up kill number 3 to put mitsuba in control so does he want to do that with all of them? He also keeps messing with nene and like why.... i just wanna know his plan...

Also how come they haven’t like put anyone else in charge of the boundaries after their yorishiros got broke? Also also why is hanako the leader despite being like the youngest like what did he do ??? He is also pretty bent on breaking the yorishiros too like couldn’t they just change the rumors instead of breaking the yorishiros? Like they did with the mokke? I think hanako has some other agenda too.

Amane:

Also thinking about if tsuchigomori knew about tsukasa ... like when amane was alive yknow like where was tsukasa ? Did he go to school? Was he in a different class or what ?? Also did amane immediately kill himself after he killed tsukasa or did he like go on for a bit afterwards ?

I’ve also had a little theory about the whole “I’m not going anywhere” scene, so like amane gives his lunar rock, that he has had and treasured since he was 4, to tsuchigomori and that seems a little odd to me, but its seems especially like su*cidal behavior yknow? If someone’s got a plan to, yknow, die, then they sometimes start acting different and start giving away things that are important to them. I’ve also seen recent theories about how maybe tsukasa got them involved with something supernatural while they were alive so maybe amane was like planning to die or something... and I’m also still super intrigued that amane was the only human to defy what was written in their book, and it makes me wonder about what was written in tsukasas book, like was he supposed to die? Was it written in amane’s book that he killed tsukasa or was that different too?

The severance:

Also thinking about the whole lead up to the severance and like how that went down—like number 6 shows up and kidnaps Aoi of all people and like sacrifices her and stuff and it all makes me wonder if hanako planned it? Like he clearly thinks the severance is a good thing and that aoi being sacrificed extended nene’s lifespan so like did he plan it? Did he ask number 6 to do a sacrifice cause like they haven’t done that in YEARS like why would they suddenly do it again? Number 6’s rumor hadn’t been changed or anything so there was no reason to do that (unless i missed something).

Red house, mitsuba:

And then there’s the freaking RED HOUSE like my goodness like what does it have to do with mitsuba??? Why did he have a picture of it? Why was the picture black until nene found it? Like the house is cursed and it seems like the picture might be too, since nene and kou mysteriously showed up at the house. There’s of course all the theories that its probably the yugi family and that it might be connected to Nowhere now so that’s fun but I still really wanna know what this has to do with Mitsuba

OH i also just remembered yknow like at the beginning of the hell of mirrors arc mitsuba is like different mitsuba and doesn’t remember anything but at one point nene mentions hanako and he like reacts like “hanako?” Like he knows the name but like stuff keeps happening so that’s quickly forgotten BUT like what does that MEAN !! Why does he know hanako !!! When he’s not supposed to remember like anything !!!! Zdfghgjhfdhfj

Oh also also what in the world happened to mitsubas arm and why does he keep it hidden?? It clearly still works cause like he grips things but he still keeps it hidden so ??? Also like his eye too idk if something happened to it or if its stylistic but its only shown vaguely like once or twice, and in scenes where he’s alive it’s much more visible so ?

Nene:

I also think nene is totally gonna die or at least turn into a supernatural somehow because like so much official art and stuff really points to it. With like pictures of the four (nene, hanako, kou, mitsuba), nene is always tied in with hanako and mitsuba while kou is shown separately or with different motifs. The ones that really come to mind is the one where nene, hanako, and mitsuba and tied together with a rope, it being tied around mitsubas neck, hanakos chest, and nenes leg, while kou is positioned away from them. With the recent chapter with that dolls leg coming off and like the references to dolls n stuff like i think something crazy is gonna happen to her leg at least. The other one that comes to mind is the one with the four pictures of their middle school entrance ceremonies, where hanakos, mitsubas, and nenes families faces are scribbled out, while kous is fine. At first you think it’s because teru and tiara are like actual characters, but in amane’s and tsukasa’s, one of their faces is scribbled out too so its not about whether or not we know the character. So like nene is continuously shown with the same symbolism as the supernaturals soooo....

Kou:

Also thinking about how kou was WAY to ready to die for mitsuba like he’s 14 !!! And do y’all realize he ACTUALLY for REAL fell off the building right then and there, not expecting mitsuba to save them ! He was fully ready to die at the drop of a hat and as much as it shows how much he cares about mitsuba like that is not healthy babey. Like think about yourself for once kou, stop hurting yourself to help others !!! People care you !!! (I’m people)

Misc:

And then i still have thoughts about the minamoto family but mostly i just wanna know more about their family and history like where are their parents ? Also that reveal that teru like protects the whole town was like crazy.

Oh also gotta wonder like why so many of the ghosts are attached to the school ?? Like i dont think any of them actually died at the school so why do they haunt the school? Shijima died at a hospital, mitsuba died like in the town supposedly, and we dont know about the yugis but idk how they would have a knife at the school unless they were doing some kind of after hours ritual. Also no adult ghosts.... all the adults are pure supernaturals.... hm.

Anyways that’s all i can think of right now and its a lot :) I’m so sorry

[xsarcasticwriterx]

Childhood friends

Summary: y/n and negan have been friends forever and have done everything togother. When negans wife Lucille gets sick negan 1st tells her. This event leads to hell but also heaven.

Warnings: swearing,rated R jokes,angst

Recieving a text from negan was a daily occurence for y/n but mosf of them didnt say "get in here. Fast." Y/n walkes into negan office seeing a stressed negan sitting at his desk hyperventilating. "Hey hey breathe" she said running to his side kneeling beside him. She put her hand on his back alarming him to her presence. He turned looked at y/n. "Shes sick" is all he can say as tears fall from his eyes.

She knew negan was speaking of his wife Lucille. Negan had been speaking of this for a while saying how Lucille was getting test done and how he had to work overtime to get the money for some of them. Y/n would help when she could with extra money she had. Due to her living alone and spending most her time passing out at negans she usually ended up with a bit of money left to do as she pleased.

She stayed with negan till he calmed down. "So the test came back?" She asked. Negan nodded. "Its bad y/n" is all he said. The look in his eyes was as if he was begging y/n to do something. "I'm so sorry negan" she said hugging him. She felt negan crying into her shoulder. After a while he pulled away. "Sorry." Is all he said. "Hey...its ok..." she said.

"Want me to come back with you after?" Y/n asked negan. Y/n has known Lucille sense highschool and even introduced negan and Lucille. She really wanted to see Lucille before it got too bad but she didnt want to intrude on negans and lucilles time. Negan nodded. "Please....i cant do this alone." He said softly his voice slightly cracking. Y/n nodded.

School had ended so y/n sat sat with negan while he finished his work. They didnt say anything she knew negan was truly hurting and she didnt wanna bother him. When negan was silent she knew to not speak he was never silent always mouthing off about some bullshit. Negan closed his laptop looking up at y/n who was laid out on the couch asleep. Negan couldn't help but just think of all that had happened within the past few hours.

He looked at y/n thinking about how she was why he met Lucille in the first place and now......here he was. He walked over to y/n picking her up walking to his car. She buried her head into his shoulder. He layed he in the passenger side walking back to the drivers side. He sat down and broke into tears. He felt a hand upon his shoulder not long after. "Its ok. She'll be ok." Y/n said softly. She put her head on his shoulder.

They both knew it was a lie the results werent looking up for Lucille but they had to have hope they had to believe. At the moment negan didnt have much hope and y/n had to hope for them both. After a few negan started driving. They reached negans home in silence.

Negan just sat there staring at the house. "It'll be ok negan." Y/n said. Negan nodded. They walked to the door as negan stared at it. Y/n grabbed his hand and nodded. Negan nodded back. They opened the door to see an empty livingroom. Turning they saw a wasted Lucille in the kitchen. "Heeeeeeeeeeeey y/n" Lucille slurred. "She shouldnt be drinking riight?" Y/n said to negan. He sighed and shook his head. "No. No she shouldnt" he stared at his wife shaking his head before walking upstairs. "Well now is just us gals" Lucille said.

Y/n shook her head. "Lucille..." was all she got out. Negan didnt come down most the night and y/n spent most the night watching Lucille and trying to stop her from drinking more. She babbled on of childhood memories. Eventually y/n got fed up and stood up and started twoard the stairs. "Y/n" Lucille said soflty. Y/n turned. "When im gone......love him the way we both know you do. He'll need it." She said before crashing. Y/n knew what she meant hell anyone who wasn't negan knew what she meant.

Y/n has loved negan sense she was 4 years old. But inevitably life kicked in and negan chose everyone else but her. She walked up stares to see negan laying in bed. His eyes were closed but based on his breathing he was awake. Y/n layed next to him with her head on his chest. "She shouldnt be alone doing that" he grumbled. "She fell asleep" y/n replied. Negan sighed and not long after was he asleep. Y/n sighed. This was going to be hell. Y/n didnt know how negan was going to do it but however she could help she would. She walked down the hall flopping onto the guest bed staring at the ceiling most the night. Why did this have to be so stressful.

Y/n woke up to the smell of breakfast. Grumbling she pulled herself up and out of bed. Walking down she saw negan and Lucille close while cooking. You'd think being in love with your childhood bestfriend whos married would be difficult to restrain feelings but honestly......y/n just wanted negan happy in the end even if its not by her. But now....well Lucille has fucked that up by saying what she did. It repeated in her head all through the night and even now. How could she put that pressure on her how could she have no hope but stand there with negan like nothing happened. Though to her maybe nothing did happen.

Y/n walked to the counter and cleared her throat. They looked and smiled. "Morning y/n" negan said. "Mornin" she replied. "What yall making ?" She asked. "Pancakes and bacon" Lucille said cheerfully. "Your awfully peppy for as much as you drank" y/n said. "Heh well yknow just want to eat" she said giggling. Negan kissed he cheek before walking to the garage to work on his car while waiting.

"Lucille do you remember last night?" Y/n asked more wanting to know if she meant what she said. "I remember what i told you if thats what your asking. I meant what i said. We both know how you feel and we both know i cant fight this. I can feel myself getting weaker and even with your help we dont have the money to fight this. You love him and once im gone hes going to need that. You need to care for him and show him you love him." She said as if it was just another fact. "Your going to be ok Lucille." Y/n heard her voice crack and felt tears start to cloud her eyes. Lucille was still her only other friend outside of negan. Shed known her sense highschool and the thought of her dying.....it shattered her heart. Lucille rolled her eyes. Y/n couldnt take this she couldn't listen to her friend talk of how she was dying.

Y/n walked out to the garage with negan feeling her legs wobble and her heart break. Negan turned and smiled softly then frowned. "Whats wrong.....y/n" negan said walking to her. He grabbed her face making her look up at him. "Nothing." She said. Negan huffed and shook his head. "Fucking hell never one to talk....." he said. Grabbing her he pulled her to the front of the car. He opened the roof showing all the improvements he had done. She adored the car it had so many memories sense even before he could could drive it. She smiled admiring the shiny new improvements. "Heh thought that could get a fucking smile out of you." He said proud of himself. She nodded. "After breakfast lets go for a fucking ride what you say ?" He asked. She smiled and laughed "absofuckinglutely" she replied happily.

Breakfast was awkward well for y/n it was. She sat only with Lucilles words repeating over and over. She felt so much pressure. After negan did as he said and they went for a ride. Eventually he stopped at a park that they went to often as kids. He walked her to their "hiding spot" that now them as grown adults was not so hiden.

Surrounded by trees and plants they sat by a broken down bonfire that was used not to long ago in the week. They sat in silence for a while. "What you fucking thinking about so intensely?" Negan asked. "Your wife." She replied. Negan laughed at how it sounded. "What about her?" He asked. "Something she said to me....." she replied not knowing if she had the right to say what Lucille said.

"What the fuck she say?" Negan said clearly lost what she could've said to have taken up her thoughts so much. "Promise not to tell her i told you." She asked. "Shit y/n........sure.......what is it?" He asked. "She said when shes gone i need to love you the way i truly do." She said. Negan made a grumble and sighing sound before sitting up more. He rubbed his face. "Fucking hell" he said.

"I dont know what to do....." y/n said. "Im sorry" she appolagize. "Dont be sorry she shouldnt have said that.......fuck." he said. He rolled his eyes and turned to y/n. He hugged her close. "This is not on you. Its not on you to care for me and she shouldnt use your feelings like that." He said before releasing her. He held her face. He kissed her cheek before sighing. He walked back to the car y/n following behind.

They returned back later afternoon. Y/n went to take a shower. After she heard arguing downstairs. She knew she shouldnt have but she sat on the step hearing it. "Why would you tell her that?!" Negan yelled. "Well i wouldn't have if i known she was going to tell you like some puppy !!" Lucille said back. "She was worried!! She got nervous with all the pressure you put on her!!" Negan replied. After a while y/n couldnt stand to listen. Negan had broken a promise and the yelling was making her remember things shed rather forget.

She walked into guest room sitting on the bed. At some point.she mustve fell asleep cause she opened her eyes when her bed dipped. She saw negan laying next to her. "Hey" he said softly. "You promised" she replied. He looked ashamed. "I had to say something. She used your feelings and put too much pressure on you. She......she knows our history and she used it. I had to fix it" he said. "But you made it worse......and the yelling......." she mumbled. Negan didnt say anything after.

Negan pulled her closer. They stayed in silence till she fell alseep. Being told to be with negan wouldve been her dream at 15 but at this point with negan married and her being told if said wife dies to love him BY said wife. This hurt her but seeing how casual negan has been the whole time.....that not only hurt but scared her.

[atomicpeache]

19, 15 and 10 for the Zutara asks :)

10. Do you have any other A:TLA ships?

Sukka is a very close second to Zutara, i love them so much!

I also really like Mailee, I just feel like they would be so cute together, and more recently I've started shipping Taang. They just work so well together and balance each other out so well.

I also love Yuetara! Oh and Bakoda. Those dads have my whole entire heart.

15. What do you think would have happened if Katara and Zuko hadn’t been interrupted in the Catacombs?

Hmmm... this is tricky. I think if they'd been there together for a couple more hours, Katara would've ended up healing him eventually (or trying), but it would've taken some time to get to that point.

I think Zuko would initially have agreed to it, and then he would've hesitated and stopped her. He is still very conflicted about his scar and whether he deserved it or not, and, by extension, whether he still wants or deserves his father's love and approval. That is, after all, why he ends up betraying her in canon.

So he hesitates, as she's about to start the process, and turns away. She gently presses him and asks him what's wrong. And he sees the look of genuine concern and patience on her face, and he's shocked at the amount of support his enemy is showing him. So he talks. He tells her a little about how he got his scar, no details, but gives her the gist. He tells her about his banishment, and his quest to hunt the avatar, and the whole time he's thinking, "why the hell am i telling her all this? I don't even know her." And Katara listens and empathizes as she did with Jet, and Haru, and Aang, and all the others, and she is horrified on his behalf.

She tells him, "it's not your fault."

And he looks at her like she's lost it because "what do you mean it's not my fault, i did horrible things to you and your friends."

And so she clarifies, "it's not your fault for getting that scar. No 13 year old boy should have to go through that."

And they sit in silence for a long time. Zuko ponders what she has said, compares it with all of iroh's comforting and supportive words over the years, and then contrasting them with ozai's words, with azula's. Katara sits in her own thoughts, trying to reconcile the zuko sitting before her with the spoiled prince she's fought countless times, and she can hardly believe they're the same person.

Finally, zuko concedes. So katara takes the spirit water out of its vial and she tries to heal him.

Nothing happens. The special properties of the spirit water have been used up, but zuko's scar is still there. When he realizes this, he jerks away from her and sits down.

"I'm sorry, Zuko."

"It doesn't matter," he snaps back, a hint of his old self, but it's half-hearted. "It was a stupid idea anyway." He falls silent, glaring at the ground, cursing himself inwardly.

Katara understands that he doesn't want to talk anymore. She doesn't really know what she would say anyway. She sits down on the other side of the cave, and stares at the vial of spirit water, wondering if she's just made a huge mistake.

There's a long stretch of silence again.

And then, "Thank you, Katara."

Katara just smiles.

When Iroh and Aang find them later, they are still sitting on opposite sides of the cave, but they are facing each other.

And when Zuko comes to his crossroads of destiny, he can't bring himself to betray Katara, or his uncle, the way he does in canon. When Iroh talks to him after Katara leaves with Aang, and before Azula arrives, Zuko remembers what Katara said, about how it wasn't his fault. So even though he still doesn't quite believe it, when Azula shows up with her offer to bring him back to their father as a hero, he can't quite bring himself to believe that either. He cannot prove to himself, beyond a reasonable doubt, that his father will accept him, now that even his (former?)enemy has expressed concern for his situation.

So he chooses his uncle, and helps the Gaang.

I have way more thoughts on this but this is already way too long than it ever needed to be, so i apologize lol.

TL;DR Zuko would have agreed to being healed, it wouldn't have worked, but he still would have switched sides, to some extent.

19. What do you think would have happened if A:TLA got a Book 4?

Part of me thinks it would've just been the plot of the comics, like the Promise and the Search, but with the Ehaszs in the writer's room it probably would've looked a little different.

For example, the characters would've been... in character. We would've gotten to see Zuko struggle with becoming Fire Lord and stabilizing the country, and a lot of that would've involved him struggling with the baggage of his ancestors, and his own issues with not wanting to become like his father, but i think that, unlike in the comics, the Gaang would've helped support him. I'm not even going to get into what they did to Katara in the comics... i pretend i do not see.

I've heard rumours that, had a fourth season occurred, Aang would've found a community of descendents of Air Nomads in the Fire Nation. I have no idea how much truth there is to this notion, but I'm just gonna roll with it.

So because Aang and Zuko are deutarogonists of the story, I'm imagining that, along with their mutual efforts to balance the world as Fire Lord and Avatar, Zuko's search for his mother and Aang's search for the remnants of his people would be tied together as the main sort of overarching plot of the season.

There are so many interesting things to be done with this: Aang would have to properly face the trauma of the genocide of the Air Nomads, without the tight deadline of the Comet as a distraction; Zuko would be grappling with his fear of becoming like his father, while being piled on with the stress of being the leader of a divided and wartorn country, while also desperate to find out what happened to his mother; I feel like a lot of the "filler" episodes would be about Aang and the gaang dealing with on-the-ground type rebuilding and peacemaking.

As for the rest of the gaang (and this has been pulled straight out of my ass - it's just stuff I would want to happen tbh): Katara and Sokka would go back to the SWT and fight against the NWT's heavy influence on the rebuilding efforts; Toph would put off going back to her parents for as long as possible until she can't anymore; Suki would get a backstory!!!!!!!! And it would be kickass.

Finally, the canon ships would (hopefully) get more development. Katara would have agency in her own love story, and she and Aang would actually talk about their feelings and what a relationship really means! Mai and Zuko would probably still fight a lot tbh. They still don't really understand each other at the end of season 3, and they would have to grapple with that.

Suki and Sokka are just chilling though. They would probably continue being healthy and communicative. Yknow, like they are in canon. Although, i do think there is some potential for conflict left over from EIP, of Sokka still deeply wounded from Yue's sacrifice, and having to properly heal from that. Actually, while he's at it, there are a couple of other things he could do with properly processing...

Okayyy i'm gonna stop it there because I've rambled for far too long already. If anyone's read all the way to this point, thank you so much. I probably wouldn't have lmao

And thank you so much for the ask @phatprog !! I had wayy too much fun writing this in case you hadn't noticed 😭 i just needed an excuse to rant for a bit

[3mmafr0st]

Hard to Hate Chapter 14

Fred Weasley x Reader Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: the usual, if you’ve seen the rest of the series you’ll know!

Taglist: @intpeach, @aria-dne, @allthebestmenarefictional, @i-should-be-writing-my-own-fic, @weasleytwinswheezes, @a-disappointing-teen-author, @amorist-3, @222moonss, @carmiml0v3, @lilypad-55449, @losers-club6, @hpbitch, @ohwelliguess​, More in the Reblog. Ask me if you want to be added to the tag list!

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 15,

Read the Russian translation Here

The next few weeks were tough on me, with the already intense stress of trying to remember all of the work we had been doing before the break, and the drama of what had happened. 

Draco was mad at me, upset for leaving, as well as whatever Pansy had been whispering in his ear throughout the month. He hadn’t talked to me since christmas and I hate to say it but I missed him. Even though he was quite brainwashed and could be a little shit, I loved him, he was like a little brother to me.

On top of that, Pansy and her gaggle of bitches were harrassing me whenever they could. Ever since they found my room, the fear that I struck in most of the Slytherin house had all but dwindled. At least before they moved out of my way, but now they just look down on me and I hated it. It felt worse than being feared.

Finally there was Fred. Funny, endearing, and absolutely beautiful Fred. Ever since he and the other Weasley’s returned to the school, he has been cold, distant. It was as if the last few months had never happened, that we had never become friends in the first place. George was still talking to me though. That was my only saving grace.

George and I had decided on the library to hang out that day. Melody didn’t want to study that day, instead opting to hang out with Lee by the lake on a date of sorts. 

“I honestly have no clue what’s going on with Fred, but I’m worried.” George told me, his voice nervous.

“Has he been the same with you, he won’t even speak to me.”

“He won’t talk to me about anything, but he’s definitely upset about something. This is the first time that he’s never not told me about what’s going on in his head and I don’t like it.”

“Do you think that he’s really upset with me, I don’t know what I could have done.” I was upset to say the least. I missed Fred so much and yet he wouldn’t even give me the time of day. It was agonizing. I liked him so much, maybe even loved, and yet he pushed me away.

George and I stayed and studied for a while, until the time came where we were to go to our next class, Potions, which we all had together. This was going to be difficult to say the least.

When George and I walked into the classroom, Fred was already there, sitting with Angelina Johnson. George was irritated to say the least, and since I knew Melody would be sitting with Lee, I offered him a seat next to me. I glanced at Fred, and he seemed to be even more grumpy than when we had first walked in. Snape began his lecture, his droaning and nasally voice going on and on. I should be paying attention to the work that we were supposed to be doing, on the lecture at hand. Instead, I was glancing at Fred out of the corner of my eye.

Angelina and Fred were sitting together, laughing and whispering together. I felt something, simmering in the pit of my stomach. I had no idea what the feeling was, but it made me want to tear Angelina apart. I didn’t even know why, I like Angelina! She’s nice and witty and good at quidditch, and well, basically everything I was but better. She was the perfect version of me, one with no baggage, no psychotic family members or racist family history. Who wouldn’t pick her? The burning feeling soon turned to sadness, this lump in my throat that only got worse and worse. George looked at me, and saw as tears began to well in my eyes, fighting to keep them from falling, I couldnt let the other students see me like this, it would push me even farther down the chain of respect and I couldnt have that. George raised his hand, and was called on.

“Professor, Y/N’s not feeling good, do you think I could walk her back to her common room.”

Snape thought for a moment, clearly trying to weigh his biases in his head, before allowing it. As quickly as he could, George walked me out of the classroom, trying to get me a good enough distance from the classroom before my legs gave out under me against the wall, tears falling down my face.

“Y/N, what’s wrong? Tell me.”

“I don’t know, just, Angelina, the two of them, ugh, I feel so pathetic.” I laughed at myself through my tears. “I mean, who would even think I have a chance next to her.” George looked me straight in the eyes, both of us on the floor now, putting his hand on my shoulder to try and reassure me.

“Y/N, if he can’t see that you’re the absolute perfect girl for him, then he’s either blind, or just plain stupid, knowing my brother, its probably a bit of both.” His joke made me laugh, and he handed me a tissue from his pocket. 

“Thanks, I just feel so hopeless, yknow? Like, the two of you, and Mel are the only good things right now, and even that's been ruined.”

“Believe me Y/N, I get it more than you know.” His eyes looked far away, kind of wistful and longing. 

“So who’s the girl?”

“If I say, it's only going to make it worse.” I thought through all of the different clues, before coming to the most logical explanation.

“Its Angelina, isnt it?” I folded my hands in front of my chest giving him a knowing look.

“Yeah,” He said. “Now I know that you think I’m just saying that because I want her all for myself, don’t you?” I silently nodded, tears starting to prick at my eyes again.

“Well, that’s not true, I’m being serious. If he’s not going to man up, then he must be an idiot.” I didn’t believe him in the slightest, but I pretended to. “Come on, let's head to lunch early, I dont think you want the others seeing you like this when they leave.”

The two of us headed to the cafeteria, simply working on homework at our respective tables, until the rest of the students began pouring into the large hall. I saw Melody walk in, sitting down next to me.

“You feeling better?”

“Honestly, Mels, it's not that kinda sick. It’s just, Fred, yknow?” She silently nodded. She knew all of the events that had happened, or lackthereof. Although she knew about it, she wasnt as involved as George, I mean, she had her own things to do and I understood. 

George was sitting close to me, in a way, our backs to eachother, so Mel and Lee could continue their conversation from Potions. I heard heavy, angry footsteps behind me, and I took a peek as to who it was. Fred was angry, but for what reason I couldnt understand. I could hear the conversation from behind me.

“George, can we talk outside for a moment.” His voice was trying to mask his rage.

“Fine” George responded, and Fred walked the two of them outside of the cafeteria. 

I tried to stay out of it, I tried to sit there, and eat and talk to Lee and Mel as if nothing had happened, but after 5 minutes, the curiosity got the better of me. What if Fred was finally saying something as to why he was so distant, ignoring me for so long. It was a miserable experience and I just had to know why. 

I told Melody that I was going to the bathroom, and then ran off, looking for the two boys.

I walked down the hall, searching around for them, when I heard yelling, two voices that I knew so well. I looked around for a moment, before finding a door that I had never seen in this hallway before. I put my ear up to the door. The voices were muffled, but I could sort of make out what the boys were saying.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Fred, am I not allowed to have friends?”

“You and I both know that it's not just friends.”

“I’m not lying, it’s not my fault that you’ve been being an asshole and pushing us away!” The yells were immediately silenced, replaced with the sounds of skin coming in contact with skin, yelps of pain and growls of anger.  

“Alohamora” The lock quickly undid, and I pushed the door open as fast as I could. Fred had wrestled George on the ground, punching him into the floor, as George was trying as hard as possible to gain the upper hand. I quickly wracked my brain for something to separate the two without putting myself at risk before finding the perfect incantation “Relashio!”

The two looked at me, then looked at each other, trying to go at it again, but I quickly cast the Colloshoo hex, sticking both boys’ feet firmly on the ground. 

“You too are unbelievable, you know that? You are brothers for Merlin’s sake, what the hell has gotten into you?” George began to speak but I cut him off, I was too angry to listen. “Fred, you need to check yourself this instant, your behavior in the last month has not been that of a friend. Friends are supposed to be kind to each other, supposed to support each other, talk to each other at the very least! Once you’re ready to explain yourself, I'll be in the astronomy tower. George, if he tries anything like that again, you sure as hell better tell me.” 

“Can you at least let us go?” George asked, as I opened the door of the mystery room.

“It’ll wear off in an hour, you two need to talk through some things.” I shut the door behind me. I was angry, confused, and upset, all of those emotions culminating in the only way that my body could understand, once again tears began to run down my face. Luckily classes had ended early today, because if not, I would have had to go to a History of Magic looking like this mess.  The only thing that I could do was go to the astronomy tower, and hope that Fred had gotten over himself enough to come and talk to me, explain why all of a sudden he was acting like this.

[loser-writings]

Tristful ||Angst || Dabi x reader

Reader: Gender Neutral

Character: Dabi x Reader (Romantic) Toga x Reader (platonic) LoV x Reader (platonic)

Warnings: Death, mention of self harm, possible OOC characters, Platonic affection between an adult and a minor. 

Summary: The league of Villains remember you a year after your death, and two are still dealing with the pain of you being gone.

A/N: I don’t know why Dabi is the one getting the attention, but he is. Welcome to the first true angst that was written at 4:30AM after some serious crying.

3/15. One of the worst days for the League of Villains. Toga would be crying all day, Magne would be doing her best to help comfort Toga, Shigaraki would be a bit more irritable, and Dabi would be completely absent. Shigaraki had managed to find Dabi though after hearing a voice that he didn’t think he would hear ever again. 

“Hey baby! I know you might think this is stupid since yknow, I’m working and Boss would kill me if he saw me on my phone, but I wanted to let you know that I’ll be coming home a bit later tonight.”

Shigaraki had remembered you. How you managed to befriend everybody in the league with your natural charisma as well as your singing that filled the halls. Sure, he may have scolded you for it before, but he didn’t mean it. It was like you both knew that deep down, so you never stopped singing. His heart ached a little as he listened again once your voice picked up again.

“They’re on your tail too by the way. I’d stay indoors for a while and let me handle everything that involves going in public. I don’t think I could handle having you taken from me.” 

Then you laughed. The same laugh that you did when you were stressed, but trying to hide it. It was obvious that under your happy persona you put on for your hero work, you were deeply troubled. Some nights ended up with you breaking down to different members of the league, but the main two that helped you through it all was Dabi and Toga. Thanks to you, the two found comfort in each other when you were gone. 

“Anyway, I’ll let you go darling. Be as good as you can be. At least until I get home-” “Hey! Get back to work!” “S-Sorry sir! Calling my roommate to make sure that I didn’t leave the oven on.” 

The voice of the eldest Todoroki boomed through the speakers before it cut off, a sigh coming from Dabi before the creek of the bed. Shigaraki could only guess what the other was thinking, so he just knocked to alert the other before walking in. He was met with Dabi laying on his back, staring at the ceiling blankly. 

“You okay?”

“Want an honest answer or the one you want to hear?” 

Shigaraki scoffed and rolled his eyes before moving to stand by the bed. “You’re of no good use to me when you’re all mopey like this. Kinda depressing honestly.” He snapped while the other promptly flipped him off. Shigaraki smiled a little before sitting on the edge of the bed. “They would hate to see you like this.-” “Yeah and I sure fucking hate not having them here to yell at me for it.” Dabi huffed and rubbed at his eyes before sitting back up. “Believe it or not, but I miss them too. I miss our bickering and how they would sing at ungodly hours. I miss how they would play fight in the bar with Toga. I miss their contagious laughter, but all we can do now is continue for our goal. A world where Heroes get what they deserve when they harm the innocent. A world where people like us don’t have to worry. A world where-” “A world where innocent people don’t get murdered and then the murderer is praised for it.” Dabi sighed and moved to run his hands through his hair. “Exactly. A world where Endeavor gets what he deserved. He found out, and he didn’t hold back.” 

They both remembered that day. They remembered seeing it on the news in Kurogiris’ bar that Endeavor had found another member of the League of Villains. Not really a big deal since they assumed it was just another pawn, but when they disclosed your name, quirk, and status, they were all in shock. They framed you to be a traitor, the bad person when in reality, you were the most “Normal” one out of everybody. You had no Ill intentions when you gave them the information they wanted, yet they praised Endeavor for “Subduing the threat.” Little did they all know, you wouldn’t wake up from the coma he put you in. In their mind, they murdered you. 

The worst part was that they couldn’t really get in to see you. Sure, Kurogiri would sneak them in to see you for short periods, but they were no longer than 5 minutes due to the risk of somebody walking into the room. Toga managed to go in one day during visiting hours, holding your hand and talking to you until visiting hours ended. Nobody would've believed that it was the bloodthirsty girl from her appearance alone since her blonde hair was down, her eyes were bloodshot and red from crying, and her normally loud voice was barely a whisper. When the doctors asked her about your relationship with her, she just smiled a little, wiped her tears, and said you were their best friend. She left you a few gifts and kissed your forehead before blinking away tears as she thanked the nurses for doing their best as she left the room. When she got back to the hideout, she just locked herself in her room and didn’t respond to anybody. It wasn’t the first true loss in her life, but it was the most painful. Her cries and screams for you didn’t fall on deaf ears either since it wasn’t an unfamiliar sight for somebody to walk through with wet eyes.

The day you were announced dead had to be one of the most depressing. Details of your funeral that was being held for anybody to attend flashed on the television before going back to what was playing originally. Despite the day being grey and rainy, everyone in the league went to see you one last time and wish you goodbye. When they saw your plain casket, Twice made a comment about how you deserved better before snapping about how it was lame as hell. Nobody minded though since they knew he couldn’t help it. Toga wiped her tears as they approached the casket before sighing softly. She clutched the stuffed bear you had given her tight in her hands before choking back a sob. This was unfair. Why did everybody she love get taken away from her? Her hand softly rest on the wood before choking back another sob. She wanted to hold you again. She wanted to hug you again and have you tell her that everything would be okay, but the hand of Magne broke her out of her delusions as she broke down in tears again, falling to the ground and screaming out in pain. Magne was quick to hug her to her chest, trying to comfort the young girl the best she could despite her own tears. 

Shigaraki did feel a bit numb to the situation, but he had been finding his mind wondering to you as time went on. Now that your casket was in front of him, he couldn’t help but find himself missing you a little more. One by one, everybody left their gifts for you before going back to the hideout to grieve in private. By the end, the only ones left were Dabi, Shigaraki, and Kurogiri. None of them spoke, just standing in the rain until Dabi broke the silence. “Come back for me in five. I need time alone with them.” The two agreed before leaving Dabi alone with only your casket and his thoughts. 

He moved to sit in front of the wooden box for a minute before he just choked out a chuckle, covering his eyes as he found them watering. “Why?” He asked out loud before shaking his head again. “Why the FUCK must he take everything from me?” Dabi asked out loud as he felt the rage wash over him. He already hated Endeavor for everything he had done in his past, but now he took you too. He quickly wiped away the tears before he grabbed his hair, tugging on it softly to mimic how you would rake your hands through his hair to calm him from his nightmares. “I thought you said you wanted to figure shit out? That we would make it past all of this and that neither one of us would leave? You fucking coward, You broke that goddamn promise!” He didn’t mean it, but he knew he was speaking to the world more than anything else. “Goddamn it...We were supposed to make it to the end…” He leaned back in his chair before looking at the casket again. “You got my fucking hopes up...for a future I don’t deserve.” he sighed and shook his head again. “And you didn’t deserve this either.” He wiped off the scarred burns under his eyes, the staples burning a bit from the tears but it was oddly comforting. After sitting for a moment, he heard Kurogiri behind him again. He simply sighed before standing to pull out the velvet box from his pocket. “Wherever you are, I hope you’re not hurting anymore.” he sat the box down on the lap of Togas bear, staring at it for a moment before sighing. “Maybe one day...we can be normal. Have a family together...like we promised.” he said before placing his hand on the wood just as Toga did before. “I’ll watch her too...So don’t worry.” He moved to kiss the top of the box before pulling away. “I love you doll...I think I always will.” he chuckled sadly and started walking away, sighing as he walked through the portal with Kurogiri following after. 

The next few weeks were hard. Dabi had kept his promise to you and kept an eye on Toga, finding her passed out one day after she had a large fit which resulted in her hurting herself with her knives. Luckily they had a spare medkit and you had taught him how to do basic first aid. Slowly, Shigaraki had managed to create a new task for the league and everybody slowly got back on their feet. It was what you would have wanted anyway. Yet at your one year death date, here everyone was all gloomy. 

Dabi sighed once more before looking at his phone, speaking to Shigaraki once more. “I have a ton of voice mails from them saved. I have all of our texts. I have videos and pictures of them. Sometimes, it just feels like they were here yesterday.” He sighed as the other man just nodded. “Yeah...I still find myself thinking of them. It’s not the same, but one day it’ll all be worth it.” Dabi slowly nodded before another soft knock was at the door, the blonde slowly walking in before noticing Shigaraki already inside. “Oh...Sorry for barging in. I uh...Just was going to ask to steal one of their shirts for the night and maybe ask for you to just...Hold me for a bit.” She sighed and shook her head, rubbing at her puffy eyes. Dabi slowly got up and nodded, walking to the closet to pick out your favorite large shirt before tossing it to Toga. She took it and smiled a little at the memories. “Uh...Thanks. I’ll come back when you’re done talking.” She said as she smiled a little at them. Shigaraki sighed and stood. “Nah, I think we are done. You both need to rest anyway. Recover as much as you can and remember, this is motivation.” Dabi rolled his eyes before sighing. “Sure, now leave us alone you fucking raisin.” Toga couldn’t help but chuckle at Dabi’s retort as Shigaraki rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you both tomorrow.” He waved before leaving the room. Toga sighed and tossed off her shirt, knowing Dabi didn’t care since he saw her as more of a sister than anything else, before pulling on your shirt. 

“Do you think that we could leave flowers on their grave tomorrow? I wanna talk to them and catch them up to speed since we haven’t talked in over a year.” Toga spoke before moving to lay in Dabi’s bed as the other stripped off his jacket. “Sure, we can do that. I bet they’ll appreciate it.” She hummed as Dabi laid next to her before she curled up against his chest, sighing at his warmth before hugging him a bit tighter. His hand played with her blonde locks before he yawned, moving to kiss her head softly. “You know they loved you right?” Toga asked which only got a chuckle from Dabi. “Yeah. Y’know that we had plans to adopt you after we won against the heroes?” Her eyes shot open and she sat up a little. “Really?!” He simply nodded and pulled her back down. “We thought you would want a family that cared. So they brought up adoption, and I agreed.” Toga felt her eyes water before she moved to snuggle in his chest again. “I would’ve loved that…” She sniffled before hugging him tighter. “I wouldn’t have been able to ask for a better family…” Dabi simply sighed and went back to playing with her hair. “Well...I’ll still adopt you when this is all over. Just give it some time?” She nodded and felt herself growing sleepy. “Okay…” He hummed and continued to pet her, watching as she slowly fell asleep snuggling into his chest. 

He couldn’t help but shut his eyes and sigh. When he met this brat, she was just some girl who was crazy, yet now he was holding her and speaking of adoption. You would’ve adored seeing how close the two had gotten and how they trusted each other. For a moment, he felt like you were watching from wherever, smiling at the sight and praising him. He could almost hear it as he pulled Toga closer, holding her protectively. “It’ll all be okay…” He reassured the sleeping girl. “We got this...We will make it through for them.”