#and idk it made me feel good about myself

[bidisasterevankinard]

It was just a joke in February. What if Buck dates Tommy. But it became more than a joke

I was so happy. I was so so enthusiastic, literally running around my house, because it was incredible. The kiss made me so so happy I never felt like it bc It was really beautiful

I was so sad after bad date, but then hopeful when Buck chose to call Tommy and ask about new chance. I was so in love when Tommy did everything to be here for Buck in 7x6. I was so so happy to see them in dress blues together. I laughed at the dinner scene

I had the best summer with my babies, talking about them, speculating, reading and writing fics. I saw so much incredible art. I met incredible people

I was so so lucky to see Buck happy in relationship where person sees his beauty and compliments him. I blushed with Buck when Tommy complemented him

I was absolutely delighted to see Buck being taken care of. No one ever did it like Tommy. And Tommy was here when Buck was himbo, when Buck was giving this beautiful eulogy to Billy. Tommy was there for Buck

Nothing led to the heartbreak I feel right now. They told me it would be different, they promised good episode. But I'm heartbroken, because for BuckTaylor break up I was ready, and actually I never enjoyed them so much

I fall in love, got so invested, and I was hit too hard

They could make the storyline with break up seems less as surprise. To let us prepare. But no. They ripped our hearts unexpectedly

Idk what happens next, I'm hopeful but Idk how long I can stay that way. Anything can happen and I don't want to really say good bye

I just want you all to know, I'm not in love with just a ship, I'm in love with community too and I hope we can support each other

On that, my love letter to bucktommy is done. I hope to let myself move on to see what happens next soon

[androidboy]

previous vs current relationship thoughts

i’ve been coming to terms with just how much my past relationship created more insecurity problems than i already had because whenever i’d get really insecure and spirally she kinda made me feel like it was me. like she’d say or do something that shook the foundation but then follow it up with something sweet that made it sound like she was obsessed with me and it was that awful back and forth that made me feel like maybe i was just too mentally unwell to be in a relationship so the fact that someone wanted me anyways made it scary to leave. i felt paranoid and overbearing and anxious and depressed and was always waiting for her to tell me that she wanted to be with someone else or that she did something with someone else and then i’d feel guilty for feeling that way when she’d start talking about how i was her soulmate and she wanted to marry me some day and i’m all she wants.

so coming out of that into a long distance relationship feels like it’d take a lot of trust but that trust feels so effortless that sometimes it makes me feel like i’m a little naive for giving it to him so easily but also it just feels so right and natural that there isn’t a part of me that wants to withhold it or put my guard up around it and the fact that i feel so good despite knowing that he does still see his ex frequently and he does still hang out alone with his past thing and he’s on the other side of the country it just feels so so wild. i do have to check myself sometimes when i don’t hear from him for a while since we talk so much because if i’m not in a good headspace i do start spiraling but it’s relatively easy to pry myself out of it since it is so recognizable as a knee jerk reaction rather than anything i actually feel toward our relationship

idk where i’m going with this besides needing to get it out of my system since i am currently climbing out of one of those spirals

[problemcore]

honestly, the barbie movie came out exactly when i needed it most.

for a while now I've felt really sad and ugly and hollow. and this movie comes out and i feel . loved and wanted. and heard. and understood.

and i can look at my own reflection and admire my face without feeling repulsed. and i love my cheeks and my wrinkles and my acne. and it all takes time and effort but im willing to do it to love myself more .

[xxplastic-cubexx]

cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..

[deoidesign]

I'll either succeed or I'll learn trying

[dazais-guardian-angel]

With today's entry, I was rather surprised and confused that Johnathan seemed to turn around so quickly from the absolute pit of despair he was in yesterday, having newfound determination and energy when he's seemingly been completely hopeless and inactive for weeks now (and for good reason). Not that I ever thought he'd completely given up, but there's definitely been a slow decline in how descriptive his journal entries have been to reflect his declining mental state (more robotic, less of his actual feelings about things), and today was a sharp contrast; it feels more like the early entries again. I thought, well, his mind is probably just so cracked at this point that he's looped all the way back around to being bold and energetic again, because by now he's desperate enough to throw caution to the wind: he either succeeds doing something extremely reckless to escape, or he fails and meets his end in a far better way than if he just waits for his fate by Dracula's hands.

...But having thought about it and reading other posts, I realized (probably stupidly obvious as it is) that his sudden change in mood probably has to do with what happened to the baby. Despite how scared he's been all this time, yesterday he didn't hesitate for a single second to try to save the baby once he realized from the previous incident what was happening, not thinking about his own life at all. And then he despaired when he couldn't save the child, the first time he's mentioned crying in the book at all, and then he had to witness the mother blaming him for her baby's death, and being killed herself for trying to rescue it. Now, the day after that horrific and heartbreaking failure, he's suddenly more determined than he's been in ages to escape. Maybe that was a turning point for Johnathan, and lit a fire under him... maybe he's clinging to the need to escape not just for himself and the people he loves anymore, but for the vain hope that he can put a stop to Dracula's schemes somehow once he gets out, because he doesn't want to let any more children die :' )

[sonknuxadow]

thinking about how the marza twitter account has been posting a lot of art of the ghosts from night of the werehog lately and they said something about lah having plans for halloween and their most recent post is this

like please you cant do this to me you cant play with me like this

[ganondoodle]

i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo

[vaugarde]

i know we joke about mirabelle being the beloved token cis because of her quest, but tbh there’s something there maybe about a trans person who doesnt wish to get surgery and feels like they have to to be taken seriously as a trans person…. idk is this anything

[momentomori24]

So I only watched a couple of routes for Flipside but now I'm fully convinced that Nicole's characterisation either got handed to someone else or was just changed entirely. I knew she was different in Re-Up and I had an inkling on how but I couldn't 100% place my finger on it until this instalment came out. I'm starting to feel like whoever wrote her here didn't completely get her character in the first game. Is that just me.

[youredyingthatsallthereis]

kinktober day 3: vanilla

roachghost for vanilla because vanilla is a sweet flavor and i love it on them <3

also this was very much inspired by @lokibus-writes because her roachghost is simply to die for!!!!!!!!

read on AO3

nonsenseafterdarks prompt list!

additional tags: missionary, anal, lots of kissing, mute roach

word count: 966

the cabin they were staying at was cozy and small, just one large living area and a bedroom with an en suite. roach had picked the location for their first leave together, knowing that even though he wouldn't ask for it, ghost would appreciate something tucked away and romantic.

sure enough, as soon as they got there, ghost had been obviously taken with the place, despite not saying very much beyond "this is nice." but roach knew he was excited when he immediately started to go unpack, putting their clothes into the small dresser and their toiletries in the bathroom while roach started making dinner.

that had been a few hours ago, and now they were in bed, shirtless, ghost on his back under roach, kissing sweet and a bit giddy at finally being alone together in a non-military setting.

roach kissed over ghosts cheek to his neck, smiling at the giggles it pulled out of him.

"tickles, bug," ghost laughed, but roach just matched the giggling and pressed a firmer kiss against his throat.

"you wanna help me get my trousers off?" ghost asked, running his palms over roach's bare chest.

roach sat back onto ghost's thighs. always, beautiful, he signed, before dropping his hands to undo the button and zipper on ghosts jeans. ghost blushed and watched for a moment while roach shuffled around as he worked ghosts jeans down, leaving just his boxer briefs that were tented up at the front with his erection.

he quickly took his own trousers off before he was back on ghost, kissing him and letting their dicks frot against each other through their underwear. he breathed in the soft moan ghost let out; he always loved the little sounds his boyfriend let out when they made love like this, all sweet soft pleasure.

they stayed like that for a bit, just kissing and rubbing against each other, chest to chest, hands gently exploring each other with the almost timid gentleness of a first time, despite this being far from their first.

after a bit, ghost ran his hands down roach's sides and slipped his fingertips into the waistband of roach's underpants. "off?" he asked quietly.

roach nodded, working them off before gently tugging on ghosts.

"please," ghost said, lifting his hips up slightly to help roach get them off easier.

once they were off, ghost parted his legs a bit while roach grabbed the lube off the side table. he held up his arms to invite roach back in, eager to feel the warmth and weight of his lover again.

roach obliged happily, quickly getting a slick finger over ghosts entrance, grinning at the happy hum ghost let out at the sensation.

you like that? he asked.

"i like you," ghost said, "you know i love anything as long as its with you."

roach kissed him again and pushed the tip of his finger in, slowly working his way in while ghost rocked his hips back to get him in deeper.

they took their time until roach had three fingers in him and ghost was panting hard against him, clipped moans coming out with every thrust of roach's hand.

roach paused for a second, looking at him questioningly.

"i'm ready," ghost breathed, "go ahead."

roach pulled his fingers out and got more lube to slick his cock up, quickly working to line himself up. he looked back up at ghost, who nodded hard.

leaning forward, roach pushed his tip in, sighing over ghost's lips as he worked his way inside.

ghost let his head fall back into the bed, closing his eyes to soak in the way it felt: the satisfying fullness, the softness of their bodies against each other, the gentle feel of every shared breath.

he shivered at the smooth slide of roach's cock when he pulled back until just his tip was inside, parting his legs wider when roach thrust back in.

"so good," he breathed, "fuck; you always feel so good."

roach bit his lip as he started setting a rhythm, tapping ghost in the middle of the chest: you.

ghost pulled him closer into another kiss, deep and passionate, only breaking it with a shaky moan when roach reached down to wrap a hand around his cock to work him in time with his thrusting.

"just like that, fuck," ghost almost whispered, panting against roach's lips as he began moving faster, "don't stop, fuck don't stop - "

roach thrust in hard and kept it there, grinding up to find ghost's prostate until he was squeezing around his cock and crying out underneath him, legs tight around roach's waist until he was spilling over his hand and onto his own stomach, gasping deep breaths of air while roach carefully stroked him through it.

he kissed down ghost's neck and started moving again, wishing he could make it last forever...but seeing and feeling ghost get off always left him close, feeling him tense and relax and release -

"come on , bug, please, please i want it so badly, fuck i wanna feel you all the way inside me, god i love you - "

roach let out a harsh whine into the side of ghost's neck and his hips almost slammed into ghosts, pulsing hard and deep inside him. he felt ghosts chest rising and falling with heavy, satisfied sighs at the feeling of being so deeply entwined with each other.

they stayed like that for a time, just breathing each other in, allowing themselves the slow, gentle closeness and intimacy that military life so frequently denied them.

"love you," ghost quietly murmured into roach's ear, wanting to say it but not wanting to disturb the peaceful quiet of the room.

roach smiled and kissed him, pulling back a bit to free his hands. love you, simon.

[spaghett-onaplate]

depression is really weird actually wdym i spent 2.5 years of my life in bed

[fleouriarts]

feeling bad about my art lately. will probably not post for a while. but i wanted to at least dump some stuff here before i retreat into my hidey hole

[ducks-love-peas]

24 icons below the cut (3 screencaps | transparent/halo version, colored bg version, original bg version | 250 x 250 px)

like/reblog (or leave a reply) if you use! or just if you like them :)

credit appreciated but not required

don't edit/redistribute/repost/claim as your own thx ⇝(want a color that's not here? have a request? ask me! <3)

[bunnihearted]

🫖🐭☁️🍚

[puppyeared]

who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it