#and i'm very anxious that that's going to ruin the experience and make it not fun for anyone and it's all going to be my fault

[legallybrunettedotcom]

So, what are your thoughts on the new Nosferatu?

I kinda went into it with low expectations, in the sense of not expecting anything new or interesting was going to be said, and also I'm not really a fan of Eggers, like all of his movies leave me wanting more, I'm never quite fully satisfied. I mean, it's always competent filmmaking and he has an interesting style and you can tell he is a researcher at heart, but idk, just on an emotional level, I am never quite moved. Maybe precisely because I didn't expect much I loved this one a lot. But then again, knowing myself and my affinities it was difficult to not be obsessed. It's obviously very beautiful. The visuals and the sound design fully immersed me, it was such a good cinematic experience. I can tell I loved it more bc I've seen in it on the big screen. Gorgeous costumes and set design. All the nods to the original were done tastefully. Performances were great, but I still feel like everyone was holding themselves back a bit, except Willem Dafoe of course. I think they could've been crazier. Lily was great, and also Aaron Taylor Johnson was pretty good and I realized I haven't seen him in anything since like Kick-Ass. Eggers is really good at creating an unsettling atmosphere, like I immediately feel anxious watching his movies and you know a happy ending is nowhere in sight. I loved this iteration of Nosferatu, I mean visually and also his voice, amazing practical effects. I suppose the movie could've been freakier, hornier, I've seen people say it's sexy but lacks sensuality and idk I didn't really feel that. And like it's not just some monster/human love story. I mean, I don't want to coddle people and be like it's okay if you want to fuck Nosferatu because I mean... many of us have been there. I think people are so starved for eroticism in mainstream film and also in their personal lives that they cling to every crumb of it and ignore or misinterpret everything else, like the fact this isn't a love story. Gothic isn't just castles and bats and ghosts. I thought the nuance, the intersection of pleasure and abuse was handled well. I get why some misinterpreted the movie, there's a specific scene that kinda "ruins" it, and in that regard I found it kinda messy, the tone was just off. All in all, though, this is my shit so I fear I will be making it my personality for a while.

[obeymeshallwedateaddict]

Beach day and 7 kisses

Imagine a day at the beach with your favourite 7 brothers. Are things going to get wild? Or is it going to be calm? Find out!

Summary: You and the brothers go on vacation to the beach. There you share a passionate kiss with each of them separately.

Authors note: This is a group story so I highly recommend you read it from beginning to end for a better experience and understanding the flow of the story.

Contains: Fluff

GN!MC x each of the brothers.

You can find more of my work here: Masterlist

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It was a hot morning in the Devildom. Some of the brothers seemed grumpy about the high temperatures while others completely ignored it. All eight of you were sitting in the living room, everybody doing their own thing when suddenly Lucifer got a call. He sighed, closed his book and picked up the phone to answer.

-Yes, Diavolo? How may I help you? –Everybody turned their heads towards the eldest as he spoke.

-Yes.. yes.. it certainly is a warm day outside.. yes.. hm? Are you sure? Mhm. Alright then. We will be right there. Thanks on the behalf of the whole family. –Lucifer hung up the phone and looked towards all of you. Everyone had their gazes locked on the black-haired demon, waiting for what he had to say in utter anticipation. That's when he spoke.

-Diavolo arranged for us a day at his private beach so we could go through the high temperatures of today. We are going on vacation. –As the eldest said his final words everybody was already on their feet in excitement. All six rushed to their rooms to pack their stuff and so did you.

.....................................................................

After a few hours you find yourself at Diavolo's private beach. It's surprisingly sunny and warm here. There is a relaxing atmosphere around the place and complete silence. Well.. the silence was ruined by the excited demon brothers who were already running towards the water wearing only their swimming trunks. Only one was missing.. The eldest. You turn to look towards the changing rooms and see Lucifer in a full body bathing suit walking out of them. You were disappointed at the sight. You expected to see him bare-chested for once and for all but that idea was shut down from the eldest's attempts to hide his body. You roll your eyes and run over to the water.

-Yo, MC! What took ya so long? Come on! We are having a race! –Mammon yelled and reached to pull you into the water. You stumbled upon your feet but made it into the water nonetheless.

-Sooo first to race would beeeee Satan and Levi! –Asmo shouted and clapped his hands. Leviathan looked around, looking anxious and stopped his gaze at the fifth-born.

-Why me?? Can't you go, Asmo? –He muttered and sighed.

-I don't make the rules, Levi! Come on! Don't be so grumpy!

-Ughh. Asmodeus I told you to leave me for a bit. The sunlight is burning my eyes. I have to get used to it! –Satan hissed at the fifth-born.

-Satan, don't make excuses. Now! Let's start! Three, set, GO! –Asmo screamed and cheered on the two demons who proceeded to race into the sea.

-i'm betting on Levi. He's good with that type of stuff. –Mammon murmurs and screams when he feels his older brother's hand on his shoulder.

-Yo, Lucifer! What's the big idea??!? –The first-born laughs at Mammon's whining and shakes his head.

-Hm. I believe Satan might do better. Levi is always holed up in his room and rarely has time for swimming. He might be out of practice. –And of course the Avatar of Pride was right when the two came back, with Satan swimming ahead of Leviathan.

.....................................................................

Lucifer

-Guys! Me and Belphie are playing beach volleyball! Come on! –Everybody turns their gaze towards the twins. Beel was holding a volleyball while Belphie was standing next to him with the biggest smirk on his face.

-What do I get outta it? –Mammon shoots a questioning gaze very at the two demons.

-There will be a special reward for the winning team. Now come on! We need more people! –Belphie shouts and Mammon runs at full speed towards the two. Asmo and Satan followed. As well as Leviathan who was dragged by the arm by the fourth-born. You head towards the sand as well but you are quickly pulled back flush against someone's chest. Lucifer's. He leans down to your ear and whispers.

-Are you having fun, MC? –He whispers into your ear and you nod.

-Yeah, I can't wait to play volleyball with you guys! I'm sure I'll win!

–Lucifer chuckles at your confidence and turns you around to look at him.

-I'm glad, MC.. –He grasps your chin and leans in to press a loving kiss against your lips. Though soon enough the peace is ruined by the second-born screaming at both you and Lucifer.

-YOOO, Lucifeeerrr!!! No getting lovely-dovely with MC! And come 'ere. The game's startin'! –Lucifer groans softly as he hears the screams of Mammon. He pulls away and looks into your eyes.

-We better go, MC. We will finish this later when there is no-one around to bother us. Come to my room after this. –You nod and head over to the beach. Before being stopped by the eldest once again.

-Oh and, MC. You look stunning in that swimsuit. –You smile, trying to hide the soft blush at your cheeks.

-You'd also look better with that diving suit off. Just so you know. –You say and run over to the beach, hearing Lucifer' chuckle from afar. Though he quickly caught up with you, delivering a teasing smack to your bottom when he reached you.

-You'll get to see me with the diving suit off later tonight. I assure you. –He murmurs and you feel your cheeks heat up. Both at his words and his actions before them.

.....................................................................

Mammon

You decided to go to Mammon's team and well you were losing. Along with you and the team were also Belphie and Asmo. The youngest was half asleep and he missed a few hits because of it while the fifth-born was admiring his nails, which also earned a few misses. Mammon was pissed.

-Yo! You two! Come on! We're losin' over here! And it's because the two of you ain't doin' anything! –Mammon yells, loud enough to wake the Avatar of Sloth from his slumber.

-Mammon don't yell like that, you idiot. I was having a moment here! –Asmodeus screamed at Mammon.

You were laughing at the argument between the three when suddenly Mammon looks your way and yells once again.

-MC! Watch out! Satan's hit the ball and it's coming towards ya! –He quickly rushes over behind you after his words but you were too late. You didn't notice the ball and it fell down upon you, pushing you to the ground. Well maybe not the ground but on top of the second-born.

-MC! Don't fall on me like that! –He is quick to wrap his arms around you, sitting up in the sand.

-Are ya okay? Not hurt anywhere? –He asks and moves his gaze over at the fourth-born which has completely lost the colour in his cheeks upon hitting you with the ball.

-Satan, ya fucking bastard! I'm going to kill ya! –Mammon screams which angers the Avatar of Wrath.

-Mammon, calm down, I'm fine. –You said but the demon didn't seem to notice you. So you grabbed his face and pressed your lips against his.

-I'm fine! –You say after the quick peck on the demon's lips. Mammon looked too stunned to speak so you stood up and helped him on his feet as well.

.....................................................................

Leviathan

After your team lost the game each of the four of you was assigned to pleasing one from the other team as their reward. They chose who would please who by drawing straws. You were assigned to the third-born, whose cheeks immediately changed colour when he heard that you'd be his for the time being. You took the demon's hand and led him away from the crowd.

If you were wondering about who the others were assigned to Mammon was assigned to Satan, Asmo was assigned to Lucifer (and was happy about it), and Belphie was assigned to Beel. (Lucky)

You led the third born to a nearby rock, which was hit by the waves. You sat on it and pulled Levi next to you. You smiled upon seeing the blush on his cheeks.

-Come on, Levi! Don't look like that! –You say and lean your head on his shoulder. He tensed up at the motion but quickly got used to it.

-You feel w-warm to the touch, MC... Just so you know... –He muttered and looked away. You smiled at his compliment, thinking it was adorable of him to say such a thing out loud. So you decide to tease him a little.

-You've become rather bold, speaking like that, tiger. –You chuckle at your own words, but witnessing the pinish shade at the demon's cheeks change into a shade of red was priceless.

-M-M-MC! D-don't c-call me t-that!! AUGHH. –He screams and you laugh.

-Awh, Levi. You look adorable at the moment. You know that? –Your statement makes him blush even more and you shake your head, trying not to giggle at the sight. You reach out and grab his chin, turning his head towards yours.

-You know what else is warm on my body? Let me show you. –You mutter before pressing your lips against those of the Avatar of Envy. He gasped at the action and you could swear that the heat from his cheeks was reflecting onto your skin as well. After the kiss the flustered demon looks over at you, hiding his cheeks.

-I...I'm pleased! Y-you can go now!!

.....................................................................

Satan

Upon reaching the wild bunch along with Leviathan next to you, you can't help but laugh at the sight of Satan in his demon form (he was still in his swimsuit though his tail and horns were out) He was glaring at Mammon, who was on his knees before the fourth-born. He had a gloomy look on his face as he looked up at his younger brother. Lucifer on the other hand was sitting in the sand with the most sadistic smirk on his face, watching the scene as if he was watching the most interesting movie there is. Asmodeus was sitting next to him, painting his nails while the twins were eating shaved ice.

-IF YOU, A PIECE OF TRASHY, SCUMBAG, IDIOT EVER DARE THREATEN ME AGAIN YOU WILL DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES. UNDERSTOOD? –Satan yelled down at his older brother, who had tears welling up in his eyes.

-S-satan! I'm sorry, Okay!! It was just that.. that.. you hit MC with the ball.. it was an instinct to protect them! –Mammon whines and grabs a fist full of sand, throwing it over at Lucifer who was shaking from laughter. When the eldest got covered in sand the smirk faded from his face and two pairs of black wings as well as two curled horns appeared from his back and head. He raised to his feet, walking over to Mammon and grabbing him forcefully by his ear, which made the Avatar of Greed yelp.

-I'll deal with him, Satan. Leave this idiot to me. –The Avatar of Pride hissed and dragged Mammon away from the bunch. Asmo was giggling over in his seat, trying not to mess up his nail drawing while the twins almost began choking from laughter.

Leviathan on the other hand was already sitting in the sand, playing on a console he had brought along with him. You walk over to Satan and put a hand to his shoulder.

-Satan, calm down. Mammon meant well.. –The demon scoffed and turned towards you, wrapping his tail around your waist, pulling you flush against him. He straddled your face with the palms of his hands and leaned in, pressing a forceful kiss to your lips. Your eyes widened, before you returned the unexpected kiss. When you finally pull apart the demon lowers his head and whispers into your ear

-MC, I'm sorry for hitting you with that ball earlier. Please forgive me.

.....................................................................

Asmodeus

After, hearing out Satan's apology he said that he wanted some time alone to think things over , before walking to that same rock you and Levi had occupied earlier. As you watched the fourth-born sit on the rock and change into his regular form, you walked over at Asmodeus and sat next to him.

-Hey, MC! Finally decided to spend some time with me did you? I mean.. I didn't think you would come to me after that heated kiss you and Satan shared but here you are. You are full of surprises. –The demon chuckles and finishes painting his nails. He admires them for a split second before looking over at you.

-MC what do you think about my nails? Are they giving a beachy vibe to you? –The fifth-born asks and looks down at his freshly done nails.

-Yup! They are so pretty! –You say and lean your head on the demon's shoulder. His body was warm against yours which made you close your eyes and take a deep breath in contentment.

-Oh? MC? Feeling rather tired are we? Hehe. No problem... You can lean there on my shoulder for as long as you wish. –Asmo chuckles and wraps an arm around your waist, resting his head onto yours.

-You know.. that kiss you and Satan shared earlier kind of turned me on.. just the image of irritated Satan, kissing you forcefully to get rid of his anger had me on fire! I swear! But.. I'm jelly, MC. You can't go kissing Satan like that and leaving me with nothing. Come on! It's my turn. Don't be shy~ –The demon mutters, before moving one hand to your cheek, bringing your lips to his own. The kiss was nothing like what you and Satan shared. This one was gentle and loving. After you finally pulled away the demon asked you to help him put sunscreen on his back and you agreed.

.....................................................................

Beelzebub

When you finished applying the sunscreen to Asmodeus' back you stood up and walked over to the twins. They were sitting on a bench near a shed from which they got their shaved ice. Belphegor was napping in Beelzebub's lap, while he was eating another portion of shaved ice.

-Oh MC! Come sit next to me there is some space. – Beel invites you after swallowing down a spoonful. A smile creeps on your face and you take a seat next to the demon, moving your gaze down to his twin brother, who is peacefully napping on Beel's lap.

-Belphie said he got tired from all the arguing between Mammon, Satan and Lucifer so he fell asleep on my lap. I don't want to wake him so I'll just continue eating the shaved ice. –Beel murmurs and looks over at you with a big smile on your face.

-Hey, MC? Do you want some of this? It's really good. It has this chocolate topping and it's making it soo yummy. You have to try it. Here. Open up. I'll feed it to you. –The demon says and grabs some of the shaved ice with his spoon, before bringing it to your lips. He had scooped up a lot and you didn't know if it'd fit in your mouth but you were determined to try. Upon opening your mouth, the demon gently pushed the spoon inside it, your lips quickly followed, wrapping around the spoon. You moan and the sweet taste of the chocolate along with the shaved ice. It was melting into your mouth, leaving a cold trace. It was perfect for the hot summer days. Beel chuckled after you swallowed to which you shot him with a questioning gaze.

-Beel, what's up? Is there something on my face? –You ask in confusion and the demon nods.

-You have some chocolate on your lips. –He mutters and you smirk upon getting an idea.

-Get it for me. –You speak and before you know it the sixth-born's lips are on yours, gently licking off the remaining chocolate from your lips.

-Mm.. it's delicious. –The demon moans.

-Me or the chocolate?

-Both.

.....................................................................

Belphegor

The sunset had already risen upon the sky when Belphegor awakened from his peaceful slumber and raised up from Beelzebub's lap. He yawned and looked over at you.

-Hi, MC.. Was I asleep for too long? –The youngest asked and you shook your head in response.

-It doesn't matter, Belphie. How'd you sleep? –You ask and smile down at the youngest brother.

-I slept well.. Beel's lap always makes for a great pillow. –He acknowledged and turned his gaze towards the sunset.

-MC? Do you want to watch the sunset alone with me? –The demon asks and a soft blush raises on your cheeks at his question. It just sounds so romantic.. watching the sunset with someone whom you're close I'm with. You smile and nod.

-Let's go. –When Belphie heard your words he reached for your hand before grabbing it and leading you away from the bench. You two reach the edge of the land and take a seat on the sand, waves hitting your feet. The demon wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to him while gazing at the sunset. The problem was that you couldn't focus. You tried watching the sunset but the demon next to you kept distracting you with his presence the whole time. Soon enough you find yourself staring over at the demon instead of the sunset. Belphegor must have sensed that, because soon enough he turned his gaze towards yours.

-What's wrong, MC? Can't focus on the sunset? –He asks and you turn your head away in embarrassment.

-You are just too distracting! –Belphie chuckles to your words and moves your face back towards his, using his hand. He slowly brought his lips to yours in a loving kiss. The last few rays of sunshine hit you before the night took place but your lips kept moving against those of Belphegor.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA? I tried to ruin a small business's reputation.

[20F] I went to a clothing store in which they sew the clothes themselves. There is a number of designs and colors you could choose from and if your size isn't available or you wanted to add your own spin on it, they can make one on request but it's basically 40% more expensive. And you're supposed to pay percentage of the price as a down payment in case they make the dress and you fail to pick it up.

Such businesses are common in my country and it was my first time going to this particular place. I'm plus size and tend to have the clothes tailored to my specific size because my size is rare.

Anyway, there was a very killer design that I loved for an outfit that was basically a skirt and a lab coat sorta look. I tried the available size but it was too tight on me so I asked them make one with my measurements and while I was at it, I chose the blue color which is my favorite. 💙 I clearly said blue and nodded when they grabbed the blue fabric. The outfit costs what would be about 120$ and I foolishly chose to pay around 80$ because I didn't have change on me and down payments are cash only, they don't accept credit cards. And by the way, that's a LOT of money in our currency but I thought nothing of it as I was never let down before by these businesses and I needed the outfit to be more comfortable at work.

Not sure what happened but when I came to pick it up, the outfit was gray. 👎 I said that wasn't what I ordered and the cashier gaslighted me into believing I chose gray and for a split second I started believing I somehow chose gray because the blue fabric was kinda pale, then I noticed the pale blue fabric right behind the gray one and pointed at it telling them it was my order and I stood my ground and insisted my order was blue. We kept arguing back and fourth and I told her to make another one. She refused because "the business will lose if they do that." I said that's not my problem and I want the blue outfit, they can put this one for sale to mitigate the loss. She refused because they will have to sell it for a cheaper price plus I was too fat and nobody will probably look for this specific size and once again said it wasn't my problem. She said it was criminal of me to deny "a perfectly great outfit" just based on its color and I told her blue was my favorite color and I refuse to leave without them agreeing to make a new order order, I certainly would have just left if I haven't paid that down payment.

Then she decided to pin the blame of her mistake (she was the one who took my order) on the expat tailor and tried to make him responsible for paying for the difference. I was unsure of what to do and I didn't want the poor overworked guy to pick the slack for someone else but at the same time I wanted the blue outfit. Seeing that I was firm she basically said she would give me a discount. I refused multiple times while she insisted.

Honestly I'm a socially anxious weak pushover that only very recently started learning and practicing to stand on my own that I was surprised I had stayed firm during this whole ordeal, but I was reaching a limit and the employee was clearly stronger than me. She wore me out and basically got me to accept the discount against my will. The discount was only about 15$ and I left very unsatisfied and upset. I complained go my sister who was with me when I made the order and she told me I was absolutely scammed and she wished she was there when I picked it up to stand up for me. I felt upset and taken advantage of, I was too disgusted by the outfit and I ended up only wearing it twice. I have no problem with gray by itself but this whole experience absolutely ruined it for me and I relapsed into feeling absolutely weak and useless like I used to be my whole life.

Apologies if I had done any AH move so far but if there was, I think I was justified but here's the AITA part of the story: in my frustration I opened their Google page to write a bad review but was shocked the page didn't even exist so I turned to their Anstagram page and I wrote several bad reviews and complains ON EVERY SINGLE POST THEY MADE. I wanted people to be aware of the problem. I also told everyone I knew. I say "tried" in the title because my attempt didn't even impact them, they didn't bother contacting me after I spammed their page with probably 40 negative comments and the business is still going strong.

AITA?

[windvexer]

How do you feel about the stance that you shouldn't read tarot for yourself about a situation that upsets/ worries you while you're still feeling upset about it?

I think it's a solid stance.

I've been reading tarot for a really long time, and the one thing that has always remained true for my practice - and what I have seen in others - is that you can't produce an accurate reading without impartiality.

Emotions are information, and that information overrides impartiality. In my experience this is true when it comes to tarot and indeed all forms of divination.

It has been a very long-standing rule of mine that querents should never send me background information on a question. That is because the background information leads me to form a judgment, and then I can't accurately interpret it.

And this is for a third party, probably someone I've never even talked to before. And my emotions can still override impartiality.

"Can I get a relationship reading for J? We had a falling out 2 months ago when I caught him texting other girls but now I'm giving him a second chance but he's being secretive with his phone again."

Okay, well now I feel a certain way about J. And no matter what cards I pull, I am going to have this emotionally driven narrative in my head. Even when I try to push it away, it's going to cloud the reading. Those emotions are going to discolor my interpretation, even if I pull cards that are technically accurate.

Imagine how much more distracting and misleading that emotional information is when it's my life, my strong feelings, and my personal investment in the outcome of a situation.

Getting an accurate reading under those circumstances is very difficult.

In my experience, while I'm upset it is very easy to produce readings that seem to be intense, solid, and affirmative according to my own verifications - only to realize later on that I literally just made the whole thing up, and none of it was true at all.

In addition, it's a bad idea in terms of mental health. If I'm already upset and anxious about something and I pull negative cards, I'm kicking myself while I'm down.

I'm not saying a person has got to be emotionless to perform divination. But I do think that a person has to stand in their own power. (Interpret that as you will). If you can find your power in being upset, like standing in the eye of the storm, perhaps you can read accurately while actively upset about the situation. I can't, and I don't think many people can.

So it's not as if being upset on a topic "magically" ruins the card pulls, or something like that.

I just think that it ruins our place of perspective, so that we are digging in the mud looking for a path forward, when we really should be sitting on a nice throne looking down at a map.

I think it sets you up for failure, and puts you at a very high risk for feeding yourself complete nonsense that you've decided is actually true, and then making bad decisions based off of bad intel.

And, IMO it's very unhealthy to let your moods hinge on whether you pulled a good card or not. Your emotions shouldn't be dependent on whether you pull Sun or Devil. But I think that people turn to divination in these circumstances precisely because they want to feel better. It's a risky game, and it's not a good idea to get in the habit of letting tarot poke at your bruises.

[kittysarchive]

u can make this a sfw reaction or nsfw but how woukd the enhypen members react to someone blowing the readers phone while there trying to spend valuable time with them

okayyyy did sfw with a side of cute jealousy

warnings- members are a bit self conscious, cute jealousy?

Heeseung

Hearing the beeps from your phone, the constant lighting up, vibrating on the table...all the while you were almost oblivious to the attention your mobile device was receiving.

"Whose that?" Heeseung abruptly stops the conversation. Motioning to the phone you quickly pick it up, seeing who was blowing up your phone.

"Just a work colleague" You brush Heeseung off, smiling at the phone while you reply to the 'colleague'. Seeing your smile, he wanted if you smiled that hard when he sent you messages...who was this person?

"What are you talking about?" Placing the phone down, you yet again try to brush him off.

'Baby It's her baby shower, I'm helping her plan it" With a small smile, you couldn't hide how you thought he looked so cute, so cute with his eyes filled with Jealousy.

Jay

Life was busy. Jay understood that. But, how come did you phone start blowing up when you were watching a film together? It wasn't the vibrations that annoyed Jay, it was not knowing who was behind the scenes. Getting tired of the constant buzzing, he finally asked you who it was.

"Who's blowing you up?" He peers his head to get a glance at you phone. As you turn it on, he see's a very masculine name pop up.

"Just John" Only introducing more questions to his head, Jay needs to know who 'John' is.

"But who is here?" He persist. The film had gone away, he wanted to know the mans identity.

"My second cousin, you met him last year" At his rush to know this man, hearing last year sent a flood of memories. John.... He already had a child and another was coming on the way, how did he forget?

Jake

Jake couldn't handle it anymore. You were at a very nice restaurant, on a very nice day wearing very nice clothes and eating a very nice meal. But to ruin this experience, was your phones buzzing.

Seeing you leave to go to the bathroom; he quickly took your phone from the table. Not knowing your password, he just needed to know the contact's name.

Jakes eyes scanned over the screen. Many contacts showed, the most common one being Sarah. You sister.

Mentally slapping himself, Jake shouldn't have been this anxious, this jealous...this insecure of who could have been blowing up your phone. Setting it on the table, he waited until you came back.

Sunghoon

Although you phone was on silent, that didn't stop your phone from lighting up. Sunghoon's eyes were drawn to the bright light. At a candle lit dinner...your phone held all of his attention.

"So who is it?" Sunghoon stated, oud and clear. He wanted to know who was ruining his nice, romantic dinner with you.

"Uh....My boss from work" Your Boss had been calling you, texting you and emailing you. Trying to get a hold of you so you could be up an extra shift.

Placing your phone on your lap, you hoped it would bring Sunghoon's attention to you and not your phone.

Sunoo

Driving home from the cinemas, all was well until your phones buzzing was on the verge of distracting him as he drove home.

"Is it a guy" Sunoo's eyes don't stray away from the road as he integrates you.

"Oh uh...." Keeping a scared face, you muck around with him. Sunoo on the other hand who was serious. Not getting the fun vibe, he believes it must be a guy....were you cheating on him?

Feeling the change, you notice Sunoo grip the wheel tighter. Did he not hear the laugh in your voice? You facing away so he couldn't see your dumb smile?

"I'm joking Sunoo it's just my work group chat" You place your phone on silent. Hoping the mood in the car will change, hoping Sunoo will trust you.

Jungwon

Jungwon is usually patient with you.... usually patient when mishaps happen such as traffic or food taking forever to arrive. What he is not patient about is phones constantly buzzing, like yours.

"Baby who is it" He gives his full attention to your phone. He was no longer patient. Taking your phone out of your handbag, you unlock your phone. Being met with the numerous calls from your ex... you weren't sure how to respond to Jungwon.

Seeing how your face frowned, seeing how you were hesitant to answer Jungwon, he knew it was someone you didn't like.

"M-my ex" You quickly swipe the notifications away, turning off your phone as well. Jungwon himself frowned, he hoped you weren't doing anything or he was asking for anything...

[itsquakey]

Q&A Time!

I haven't done a Q&A in a while so let's bang out some asks from the askbox and answer them.

Without really saying much, things have kinda gotten better, but I am def in a hole right now from multiple pretty saddening things happening to me all within a month. I'm having a lot of issues drawing but I don't think it's burnout-more likely I'm just a sad lump. I'm sure I'll improve though once the year finishes us.

Kind of...I plan to make either a epilogue for Revenge of Pike Knight or an entirely different comic about his process of letting go but also forgiving himself for her actions. He never goes back to being sweet bandana waddle dee but she does manage to loosen up as time goes on.

Mago gets stripped of any and all power that the average doomer doesn't have. So yea. He's a little guy you could punt like a football.

It's honestly really hard to say what my favorite food is, as I am someone who struggles with food (I blame it on the fact I almost died of starvation as a toddler and it ruined my entire digestive system but who knows it could be crappy genetics too). However here are some foods I enjoy that people may like! (Recipe Links are in the names)

Banoffee Pie: I usually like it without the bananas though, they are too soft texture-wise for me so it's really more Toffee Pie. Just remember if you are making the toffee from scratch that it is basically like making a bomb and you HAVE to make sure timing is correct otherwise pressure will build and either you will die or your kitchen will get a nice brown coat of sugar-paint (Personal experience here).

Chocolate Souffle: I always have this for my birthday so it's a fond treat. It IS a souffle though, so it's very hard to make if you do not have the experience.

Quiche: I love quiche, it's something that is eggy but also a pie and I can eat it any time of the day. I usually like just cheese in it but meats and some small greens are also good.

And finally- Zucchini Brownies (Or just walnut brownies): Which I actually haven't had in a while but man am I craving them. They sound weird but you can't taste the zucchini and it brings a nice dampness to the brownie.

When Powehi was little his sisters loved to tease him even though he would give little to no reaction. They seemed to have a decent relationship as children but I would not be surprised if Powehi doesn't really like his sisters a whole lot when he's an adult. They're still as annoying as before but now they act more like their father (a pet peeve of his). However they are still his sisters at the end of the day, so he puts up with them.

Since I don't know if I have the post up anymore- ANY FANART OR INTERPRETATIONS/INSPIRATION OF MY WORK IS OKAY. If it is fanart or is heavily based off my work all I need is name credit or an @/. If you @/ me, there's a very high likelihood I will see it and reblog it!

As someone who worked with various animals including tarantulas for a while- I love them. I love their fuzz and their little claws and paw pads and the fact they're chill (but at the same time very anxious) little dudes. I think they get a bad rap but they're nice.

If I remember correctly, the death of Meta Knight comic was originally artist trolling. Yes, I made the comic to purposefully get a reaction from you all and laugh evilly while you cried over his death. However that comic is the backbone of Nextgen and I'm glad I made it.

Yes, I will get to that art eventually. I'm just taking my time for reasons. I will/am also uploading art that is old but was never released on my account. Eventually once all the old art is posted new art will start up again.

Meta works his way up the ladder to become a Reaper. Not really spoilers but his design will be brought back soon. But yes, he can still see his friends with the help of Morpho. Also Galaxia shattered in the death comic, so she's long gone as well but returns to Meta in the afterlife at some point.

Dedede ain't dead yet! He's still kicking. Meta would have to meet him in the mortal realm as a little buggy.

Yes, however I highly doubt I will ever cover them in Nextgen, so it's up to fan interpretation at the end of the day.

Yes he does, he takes the form of a beetle much like Morpho takes the form of a butterfly in the mortal realm and gets to visit his friends when he can.

Apologies, but only my girlfriend can hug me : )

I imagine if the situation calls for it he does use his tongue. However he mainly chooses the sword and his fabric arms.

In Nextgen I like to imagine Kirby's copy abilities change as they grow up instead of someone upgrading them for him, hence why they look different when he uses copy abilities.

Powehi has always had some of Marx's powers and grew up with them normally. However as he gets older he begins to really not like them because it makes him different in a way others may be intimidated by.

In Nextgen Chilly and Magolor never got nor will get married. They're off again on again exes because it is way funnier that way and honestly aligns with the one manga more.

Magolor and Chilly met during the events of Star Allies, and their relationship/personalities are kinda based off that manga in a minor way.

Arthur showed up out of nowhere on Castle Dedede's entrance and ever since then Kirby has taken care of him.

In a surprising turn of events, no. The waddle dee from Kirby 64 in Nextgen is actually Bandana's/Pike's older brother who is the sole reason Bandana/Pike went down the path she did. The stories that were told about the adventure and the heroes his older brother worked with got her to be inspired enough to actually work alongside Dedede and later Kirby and the others.

Because that belt buckle is the last remaining piece of who he used to be. His robes are gone along with everything else but that buckle. He is now nude.

All Noddies are biologically and magically tied to the Dream Fountain which is the thing that gives them their dreams and tiredness. The only way Castella can have nightmares is if there's some kind of tampering with the Dream Fountain that effects it negatively.

I don't think canon Bandana would enjoy the fact I assassinated his character for some plot lmao. But for the sake of the funny just imagine them interacting like that one sonic and shadow clip from Sonic Adventure 2.

The cycle of matter only affects Dark and Light matter/ anything in between that. Matter like that usually will never see a reaper in their life because their souls almost never make it to the afterlife and instead are in a constant cycle of reincarnation, hence the name. Meta Knight was merely lucky enough to have Morpho break the rules for him just like how Necrodeus broke the rules for him when he was Gala and took his soul to the afterlife. Normally living things are taken by reapers to the afterlife when they die though. While non-matter characters like Dedede, Magolor, Marx, Pike, etc will be able to have a one way ticket to the afterlife, I'm keeping it vague for Kirby as not to spoil future ideas.

That's all for now! I'll be answering more asks in the future don't worry.

[liminalpebble]

Stray: Part 8

Masterlist Link

Part 8

Loki's heart felt lead-heavy as he finally forced himself to release you from his embrace. Finally, he sadly accepted that he'd missed his opportunity to kiss you. In return, you gave him a bittersweet smile, baffled that he didn't make his move when it seemed inevitable that he would.

Maybe he intends to just abandon me at some point, like everyone else does. Eventually, I'm always going to be alone. But, for now, there's something beautiful to experience, so I won't take it for granted. I'll hold onto the good parts when the worst happens, I'll treasure them. That's all I can do.

You felt like crying as the two of you continued strolling down the main promenade of the carnival; two heads bowed, two sets of hands buried in pockets, two sets of eyes glittering faintly with unshed tears and unspoken words in the carnival lights. The sun had set in a beautiful amber and rose vista while you had rested against his chest. You watched, considering the poignant fleeting nature of all beautiful things as the sun sank below the hills. A velvety indigo night had descended by the time he finally unraveled from the hug. You had never felt colder than you did in that blanket of darkness and the absence of his touch.

After a few steps, you took a chance that you knew might result in a broken heart and a shattering rejection from this man. You decided to be brave anyway. Reaching, you touched his arm lightly, hesitantly. Henry's bright irises met yours, understanding what you sought. He smiled a tight-lipped affectionate smile that creased the corners of his eyes, and you could swear his face shone brighter than every bulb around you. Loki's heart leaped back up from where it had tumbled to the floor as he rushed to entwine his fingers with yours while strolling; quietly, pensively, each of you floundering in your own ruminations until finally, you asked, “Henry?”

“Yes, darling?” he rushed out, anxious to finally exchange words again.

You faced him, and placed a hand on his sharp cheek, “Would...would you like to come over? We could talk a little while.”

“Yes! Yes, of course. I'd love to. If you don't mind....yes,” he blabbered, and you couldn't help but laugh at his enthusiasm.

Loki fizzled with joy because you wanted more time with him, because perhaps he hadn't ruined things, because perhaps he would have a chance to be closer still, because...

Damn. Loki suddenly thought, realizing that if he was there, her beloved little black cat wouldn't be, and he would have to find some way around that. What were you thinking?, he scolded himself. He knew the answer was that, of course, for once, he wasn't thinking. He wasn't scheming. He wasn't anticipating his next lie or ploy. He was in love and it was making him reckless. Loki was desperate to be near you in this form just a little longer. He would wring every minute, steal every second, if he could just have more of his borrowed time with you.

-----

As you unlocked the door and ushered him inside, you said, “Welcome to my palace. I'm sorry it's not much. I know it's probably not the kind of thing your used to.”

“Hmm. You'd be surprised,” he said, cryptically, then added under his breath, “I like the new curtains.”

You gave him a puzzled look. You'd just changed those curtains yesterday. He continued, realizing his mistake and rushing to deflect, “Well, I've been all over the world...lots of places. And I think it's very sweet and cozy here. I love it.”

You smiled, thawing under his glow. “Oh! I forgot to ask. Are you alright with cats? I hope you're not allergic.”

“Oh...no, no problem at all. Not at all...but just...” he began to mutter in a panic.

“I just have to feed him and then we can have some coffee, yeah? Loki!” you called as you hung up your coat. “Loki?” you repeated with a bit more worry in your voice. He had always greeted you immediately before. You considered that maybe he had just scurried away into hiding because of the presence of an unfamiliar person.

“Sorry, Henry. Just a moment. Please, make yourself at home,” you said as you continued your search around the tiny apartment.

Henry called after you a moment too late as you were already peeking behind every piece of furniture in the tiny flat. He sighed, exasperated and afraid. It would only take you a few moments to look everywhere and realize inevitably that...

“He's not here,” you said quietly, eyebrows peaked in confusion and concern as you returned to Henry.

Loki tried to think quickly. “Hey...hey! Darling. Look at me. It's alright. I'll...I'll help you look.”

“I...I looked everywhere. I...” you trailed off as you noticed the ratty green collar, abandoned on the counter and a nameless foreboding crept up your spine. “No. No, something is wrong. I need to...”

Henry held you firmly by the shoulders and looked into your eyes, saying your name slowly, then, “I know this sounds insane, but that sweet little black cat is fine. I know that he's fine. I promise.”

Your look of dismay turned to one of sinking suspicion. Suddenly you saw the odd, charming man before you in a new light of doubt. How did he know Loki was a black cat?

You went through all of it in your mind, from the beginning. He swept you off your feet at work after apparently “noticing” you (unbeknownst to you) for some time, only communicated through messages and gifts but never called. He knew what to order for your lunch without asking. You were reminded, with a sinking feeling in your stomach, of his sly expression as he knowingly quipped about his “intuition”. He found out where you lived, knew your curtains were new, knew what your cat looked like. Now...now you had invited him into your apartment.

Idiot, you scolded yourself. He's some kind of stalker lunatic. You were too smitten to see it.

You spoke more loudly, “And how the hell do you know that, Henry? ...if that's even your real name,” you said, walking backwards toward the kitchen and drawing a large knife out of the holder.

Loki said your name gently, eyes going wide, and put his hands up in surrender, “What on earth is this? What's going...”

You stared him down, glaring over the glinting line of the knife. “I...I was so bind...an unbelievably dashing and mysterious foreign man noticing me at work, giving me fancy letters and gifts...never even telling me your last name...sweet-talking Janet into giving you my address. Did you take Loki because you're some kind of obsessive weirdo? Have you been in my apartment? What...what are you...some kind of con artist or...or just a pervert? Well, I obviously don't have much to steal, so why are you doing this? Should I check my underwear drawer for a few missing panties, or what? Just....what the fuck is this?”

The volume of your voice climbed as your words grew more frantic and shrill.

Loki sighed and gathered his thoughts, speaking deliberately as he moved closer, “Please, just listen. You can't hurt me with that. You're more likely to hurt yourself, so please, put it down.”

In a panic, you lunged forward with the knife. In a glow of green light you passed right through Henry and tumbled to the floor, as the blade clattered over the tiles. You winced, feeling a bruise begin to form, then your mouth dropped in shock as you watched Henry evaporate in a glowing green slither of light.

You began to scream, but a cold pale hand covered you mouth to silence you. The man beside you was the man in your dream; coal black hair, alabaster skin, and Henry's face in a different color palette. Your mind went utterly blank aside from a single frenetic thought on loop. I'm dreaming. This isn't real.

Loki felt horrible about causing you pain. He could feel your hot stilted breath pummeling his palm. You trembled like a small terrified animal under his hand. He thought of how you must have bruises blossoming somewhere on your precious skin from your fall.

“As much as I hate to see you in distress, I'm afraid I have to do this,” he said, eyes wide and apologetic, brow creased in concern. He raised his hands summoning a green glow that wrapped around your arms and mouth, stilling and silencing you, then compelled you to sit on the couch. Once you were sitting, he knelt before you in his armor, green cape flaring like a curtain over the floor. In another situation you might have laughed at how much it looked like some Arthurian prince about to rescue a maiden in your shabby apartment.

“Please. Please, listen,” he said very softly. “What I'm going to tell you is going to be hard to believe. You saw me, in your dream, but I'm real. I am Loki Odinson, Prince of Asgard, and I am Henry, and I am...well...I'm also Loki, your cat. Now...if I remove the binding from your mouth, do you promise not to scream?”

You forced your mind to at least try to wrap around this. You had just seen the impossible and you had to admit that you'd be no match for this...person?...Magician?...God?. And as usual, you had to find out what all this meant. Your curiosity trumped your fear. Finally, you nodded.

He smiled and released the binding over your mouth. You took in a heaving breath and blinked a few times, still not entirely sure of what you were witnessing. He averted his gaze and said, “I'm so sorry to hurt you, or confuse you...”

“Or lie to me? Or terrify me?”

He sighed. “Yes, especially that.” He was silent for a moment, tongue poking between his lips in thought. You were surprised by that. It was a cute gesture, reminding you of...of your cat.

“Jesus...this...this is all so weird. I can't...”

“I know,” he said, soothing, “But I also know you're very good and you're very clever and you're very brave. I've seen it within your mind. I've seen it in your actions.”

“You can read my mind? Fuck...that's unsettling.”

“It's...not quite like that. Just...we have a special connection. I don't even entirely understand it. I wasn't anticipating it. We can see into each other a bit more than other people can. Listen, if I touch you. I can show you everything. Can I do that? Please.”

You considered carefully. He was asking, genuinely asking. A psycho killer probably wouldn't ask, right? Fuck...whatever, at this point. I can't go this far without knowing.

“Okay,” you said.

With your permission, Loki slid his hands very gently over your hair until he was cradling your head in his elegant hands. Slowly, he placed his forehead against yours and a green glow spun into a nebula around you.

Time became strange. Your consciousness tumbled through his experiences as he poured his knowledge into your mind. You saw his life in Asgard, his family and friends (if you could really call them that). You saw why he related so much to you in some of the saddest ways. Tumbling further, you saw in more detail; the bet with Thor, the hijinks as D.B. Cooper and every moment and thought and image from his perspective since he landed in that dumpster.

It was an odd thing, a completely foreign experience, to see yourself through Loki's eyes as his perceptions changed. At the start, as a liar, a narcissistic schemer and fugitive, he saw you as nothing but a tool, a servant, and a diversion. It was even stranger once you began to see yourself through the lens of his reluctant but unstoppable feelings of affection, then friendship, then through the floral illuminated frame of utter selfless love. He loved you. This ancient god, a strange and powerful and feared being, loved you. The god of mischief saw you as a goddess; one whom he hoped would choose to be by his side for all time. You saw yourself, in many iterations, through the frame of his eyes, and what he saw was absolute worthiness (a feeling you had never really felt for yourself).

Then the green fog cleared and you heard the echo of his beautiful deep voice calling you back to the present. As you slowly opened your eyes, he leaned back and unraveled the bindings from the rest of your body. You both sat quietly for a moment; you on the couch, and Loki still kneeling beside you. After a moment you chuckled and said with a wry smile, “That was brave of you to do. How do you know I won't still come after you with a kitchen knife?”

He chuckled in relief. “I'll take my chances. And I'm not nearly as brave as you've been, darling.”

“So...now I know everything,” you said softly reaching for his hand. He looked surprised by that, uncertain if he deserved to hold your hand, and it made your heart ache.

“You do, and yet...my kind, brave girl...you still reach for my hand?” he said gazing up, those bright aquamarine eyes wide and solicitous.

You squeezed where your palms pressed together. You nodded and smiled as tears made their way down your face, making it hard to talk with the tightness in your throat. You said, shakily, “But you've only seen into some of my mind...my history. What if you don't like the rest? All the pain, and insecurity, and bad days, and mistakes, and disappointments, and failures and...unworthiness...”

Loki inturruped your downward spiral with a finger against your lips. “Shh shh shh. You are worthy, that doesn't mean perfect. No one is.”

“But you can't know how much worse I might really be. I think I'm a pretty good person...I try to be, but what if I'm not...what if I'm not who you need me to be?”

Loki came up to join you on the couch now, sitting closely and wiping the tears from your eyes. He said your name, reverently, like a prayer. “Who you are is someone who has worked very very hard...someone who's survived so many bad times and bad days and abandonment and a childhood of being dragged to church and shamed. You're someone who set out alone across the country to build a life...someone who loves horror movies because you always try to push yourself towards the things that scare you. You're someone who summons the strength, every day, to face the world as it is and to find beauty in it, because you're so brave and so kind. You're someone who loves to drink coffee in the afternoon, but falls asleep on the couch after awhile anyway. Someone who has read hundreds of books.

Your favorite color is purple, and your favorite band is The Velvet Underground. You're always cold, and you've worn that damned gray sweater for 10 years to try to stay warm but it's never enough. You like tomato soup and grilled cheese on rainy days. You hate those high heels and kick them off in the same spot every single day. You're someone unbelievably generous...generous enough to take in a moody selfish little homicidal creature mewling from a rubbish heap. Who else would do that?”

You chuckled through a sob, answering, “A lot of people, Loki. That's just called owning a cat.”

He laughed with you at that, then stroked a hand through your hair, tilting your chin so you could meet his eyes. “And you're very funny” he added to his long list. “Please, believe me when I tell you this. No one like you has ever been, or ever will be again. You are entirely unique. And in all of the cosmos and the myriad realms, I had the good fortune to find you and now....” he said, moving closer still until his sharp cheek grazed your own soft one, “I don't ever want to let you go.”

Loki kissed you, breathy and hesitant at first as his lips skated across your own. Then your sighs mingled and your mouths opened to invite each other in...to invite each other home...finally home. You lost all sense of time as his arm encircled your waist and your hands wove into his soft inky hair. You never wanted to stop. The two of your were lost in the world of your own senses; a universe of breath, and warmth, and the soft feeling and smell of each others skin (a mingling of mint and lavender), the sound of pattering night rain outside the balcony doors.

You both jumped as the rain turned suddenly into a thunderstorm, interrupting your rapturous moment. The brightest lightning and the loudest thunder you had ever experienced, rioted outside as your balcony doors swung open. You yelped as the largest man you had ever seen in your life materialized in your living room. Loki jumped up and gathered you tightly, protectively, against his own body. The enormous viking man bellowed out, “Brother! I knew you would show yourself once again and we would find you. You can't run forever, you conniving little snake!”

@averagetmblrusser @primrosesposts @fruityfucker @arunabrak @mischief2sarawr @ladyofthestayingpower @acidcasualties @unlucky-number-13 @goblingirlsarah @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokihiddleston @chokeanddagger @lokischambermaid @lokisgoodgirl @marcotheflychair @smolvenger @alexakeyloveloki @littlespaceyelf @little-wormwood @loopsisloops @joyful-enchantress @eleniblue @loz-3 @the-haven-of-fiction @sweetsigyn @muddyorbs @icytrickster17 @holdmytesseract @thenerdyoldersister @thedistractedagglomeration @sailorholly @coldnique @sarahscribbles @peaches1958 @infinitystoner @peachyjinx @mischiefmaker615 @jennyggggrrr @tripleyeeet @itsybitchylittlewitchy @mochie85 @huntress-artemiss @madi0987 @buttercupcookies-blog @annoyingsweetsstranger @anukulee @aesonmae

[sandorsubs]

resonance method

i was chilling and suddenly an idea popped in my freak mind. if you know my yt channel maybe you know i'm fond of tuning forks(nothing kinky dw). humans are literally an electronic tuning fork. we can call back memories and emotions, reliving them as fresh as the day we experienced them. then we vibrate those emotions in same frequency. it doesn't matter if we experience something real to feel those emotions.

some emotions are stronger than others and we resonate with them unwillingly. suddenly we find ourselves anxious and nervous if the emotion is negative(obv).

but if you think humans are all boring, i think emotions are our super power. it's pure energy and fuel that feeds our reality. but why do we let them ruin our lives instead of actually controlling them? fyi i don't mean to suppress them because if an emotion tries to come out, first of all let that beatch discharge itself. lingering emotions needs controlling, like parasites they're always there and you summon them when exact thing triggers it. i think meditation is also a form of controlling your emotions but more like putting them aside. in this method we will be using emotions in our advantage.

using vibrational energy chart

you may heard about vibrational energy chart. top of the chart, you can see enlightment, highest frequency of all. does it sound familiar? because i believe it refers to pure consciousness, aka void state. so how to summon these emotions to reach enlightment?

i decided to use 10 high vibrational energies. but it's up to you, look at the chart and find out what you feel right now. i'll need you to write down each one of them and start from the emotion that has lowest frequency, pour your heart. write only a one strong sentence or a whole paragraph. i'll call this summoning because if you can listen to a one sad song and start feeling down, you can do the same with each emotion. you can summon them.

i've said 10 and i started from pride, which isn't a high vibrational emotion but i think pride and courage are linked together. all of these are linked. but since i'm explaining, i want you to see how to summon a low vibrational emotion and face with it by using the next one to move forward and achieve higher vibrational state.

pride

to have a courage sometimes you need to leave your pride behind.

i know that feeling very well, not trying for once feels better than failing. because i'm too prideful to see myself fail. so in the back of my mind, my fragile ego can rest safely. i'll keep feeding it with possibilities of achieving which is never going to happen if i don't have courage to stop this cycle.

i'm too prideful because of the fears i don't want to face: fear of losing, fear of not getting what i want, fear of having same results or no result at all, fear of getting mocked, fear of the unknown, fear of having it but not as i want.

i bet you summoned this emotion already. because we all have fears.

pride comes after anger, because anger is actually a powerful fuel. when you are frustrated and willing to do anything, pride comes like a stop sign. it extinguishes everything but you still burn from inside, like embers.

courage

anger and courage also feels familiar but that fire would burn everything down anyways, wouldn't it? oftenly angry person's senses are blinded, they don't see or even think clearly. but a brave person feels everything, they are aware of every cell of their body, every ticking second and every sound. because they have to. they need to be ready to face their fears. yes, that's why it feels alive to have adrenaline rush. if anger is fire, courage is ice.

mind you, having courage isn't being fearless. it's looking all of your fears and being able to say it's okay. its okay if i fail, i'll get there eventually. i trust myself because as long as i have myself i'll make it work.

most importantly, courage is saying no to your pride. because you can't take advice from brats, right? they only demand but never deliver.

neutrality

what is neutrality, seriously? it sounds boring, hell yeah. but wait wasn't neutrality a blank page? lots of people wish for it every single day. i see old people admiring youth, yearning for that fresh start.

you know those games when you drink some red potion, it slowly decreases your health or gives you bad side effects. neutrality is having full hp with zero negative effects.

feeling an emotion is letting go of the other one, not because they aren't useful anymore. because they are now part of you. you chewed and swallowed and even digested them already. so when you've reached the enlightment, you will be holding all these emotions but now they will be fitting like puzzle pieces. you let go of pride, you discarded your fears with courage, so it must feel like your first attempt to shift, eh?

if you started to like neutrality, let's not just stare at this blank page. let's goooo

willingness/acceptance

we'll resonate with willingness and then acceptance. these emotions are so strong they'll elevate themselves. at this point you are ready. you accepted everything. you are ready to fill this blank page.

your mind might come up with past events or experiences, you've considered as failures. these are different from fears because since your mind realized you are brave and willing to keep going now, it tries more logical ways to trick you, so you can go back to pride for keeping your ego safe. only to be stopped by anger because you didn't go further and it goes all the way to the down, to the lowest point. ugh, hell nah 👊 not on my watch

mind: it didn't happe-

you: yes it didn't happen last time, so?

mind: it wasn't like what you wa-

you: yes, it wasn't like what i wanted, so?

mind: but you have never experienced th-

you: yes maybe i have never experienced this before. maybe NO ONE ever experienced this before, so what? i don't care, i accepted every possibility. you can't stop me.

yeah your brain might come up with a lot of stuff, so? this is also accepting the annoying voice, don't worry their jaw will drop in higher frequencies so they do shut up...finally.

reason

now these are snacks. take everything you see and devour them, it's buffet. if you have minishifted or shifted before, that's a powerful reason for you. whatever you have experienced even if it's lingering feeling inside you screaming "i have a feeling i'm going to shift, this is the day" hold onto it. think about reasons why you want to shift or why you believe in it. if you can't think of anything, at least make sure to motivate yourself. hype yourself, believe in yourself, dig loa to the core. if willingness and acceptance is equivalent to making plans to take a journey, reason is thinking about all the good things you'll experience on road and why you want to take this journey. at this point you won't be able to contain your excitement.

love

maaanny of y'all shift to experience love so i believe this is showtime? dude love is mindblowing.

you love without a reason and even from a distance. people do good and horrible stuff every single day to give or receive love. maybe you read this whole ass paragraph to give or receive love in another reality, hello?? you can do anything for love. it doesnt have to be for a significant other.

i'll give you an example, people have childhood dr's to heal their inner child. this is pure love. people script loving parents. mind you if you claim you don't love yourself, you shift to your desired reality to give yourself what you've always wanted. i mean who does this for a person they don't love? i believe everyone loves themselves in a point, they are just not aware of it.

i'm not gonna talk about love for significant others or friends because this is personal and you don't need my words to feel it.

joy/peace

the thing is, it gets easier to vibrate these emotions when they get higher. you may experience gratitude and happiness out of nowhere. i had this dream when i met my older self, i've never felt this safe, loved and happy. it's crazy because i thought she is god or something, until i realized that's my older self. because of the incredible amount of love i feel toward her. not that i was perfect example for self-love. i struggled a lot, but this dream changed it for me.

it's like relying on someone and being relied on at the same time. you trust yourself and you'll make it happen for yourself at same time. you'll motivate yourself, you'll carry yourself forward, you'll always be there. if you struggle to wrap this around your head, try to perceive yourself as someone else. people talk about creating another versions of yourself but having three versions of myself (kid, adult and old) helped me more than anything. when you have all of your pieces, you are more than complete.

enlightment

-

(but hey, seriously, how can i explain enlightment? you became everything from the start. since i love yapping i'm gonna tell you about how opposite emotions are actually has same strength but they just vibrate differently. looking at the chart, enlightment and shame is opposites. when you feel shame you want to erase your existence from the world. you want to hide and never to be seen. enlightment is the exact opposite, i picture a blooming flower with light and it takes everything in like devouring and expanding. it becomes source. you are the branch but also the tree itself because you cannot be separated.)

what comes after you reached enlightment?

duh, that's the void state. make yourself comfortable. and don't worry if you haven't reach, stick with the existing emotions. don't force it to happen. you can still visualize or affirm for void state. or set intention and fall asleep.

welp that was all. thanks for reading it, idk if this is an existing method, heh.

i explained it only for 10 emotions but if you need to start from bottom like i've said check the chart. start wherever you like, from the strongest emotion. untangle your yarn. (if you need an explanation starting from the bottom, i can write a post about lower vibrational emotions too)

this isn't hard, it's just temporary when you first started it because emotions are just like liquids. but i believe when you practice you'll be able to quickly summon these high vibrational emotions.

[whoslaurapalmer]

okay so many book of bill thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ⚠️

-me, earlier: i hope it is as good an experience as journal 3, tasty little tidbits and lots of decoding and sticky notes and everything.......... -AND IT WAS!!!!!!!

-i know the big fear going in was like, we were gonna get too much bill backstory and it would ruin him as a character, and i'm so so so thrilled that THAT WAS NOT WHAT HAPPENED -we got a little more to add to the 'flat minds in a flat world with flat dreams' and a little more about how bill felt about living there and his hand in destroying it and honestly to me it was just. perfect. just some extra little things to think about with nothing really, truly concrete -definitely something to chew on with bill saying 'a monster' destroyed his home and him being 'twisted out of shape after the kill' and that he'd consider changing it.. like there's definitely a way to take it maybe as a tragic backstory but it also doesn't have to be because there's still so much we don't know about how it happened. and bill has........so many multitudes -like, i think, even if he has regrets? bill would do it again. he 'looked at the stars' and wanted to be one and mutilated his home world for it and although it wasn't his intent i really do think he'd do it again. there's probably a version of bill that has done it again -like personally i'm pleased with it, i'm not thinking overly hard about it, i think it's just something else to yeah chew on, and keep chewing

-aaaaa there's just SO MANY THINGS to talk about. so many fucking things!!!

-i love the page setups! i love the like, science book looking pages. the ads. the omnipresent superficial physicality of a non-physical being. -AND -HOLY SHIT -THE GREAT GATSBY -JUST, THERE, FIVE PAGES OF THE GREAT GATSBY -GREAT GATSBY -incredible. absolutely so, i'm still laughing

-THE TROLLEY PROBLEM PAGE. THE TEST. THE 90S 'SQUINT TO SEE A PICTURE' PICTURE. MCKAYLEIGH. THE REFERENCE TO THE FAKE JOURNAL AUTHOR LEAKS. THE 'IT WAS ALIENS' MEME. WOULDST THOU LIKE TO LIVE RIDICULOUSLY. ABE LINCOLN RATATOUILLE. CIPHER, I CHOOSE YOU! THE PRECIOUS MOMENTS PUDGYLILDARLINS TRI ANGELS COLLECTION, BY MARTHA

-no I REALLY thought we were gonna get CONFIRMED SAME COIN. on the chapter cover for bill's origins he's literally coming through the wall of stan and ford's childhood living room. stan's page going 'how is bill even writing this anyway?? where is he??' the stress from the axolotl on 'different form'. I was sooooooooo anxious to turn the page at the end bc I was like oh my god is this it. is this it. IS THIS IT -it was not! -but goddamn. -although. wait. actually really reading the therapy part with my brain in gear compared to seeing it last night -yknow....................i mean...................he's eligible for reincarnation if he "completes" therapy -so -so -SO -HELLO??????????????????????????????????? -WAIT????????????????? -is it. are we considering. this is happening

-I felt the delight and horror and heartbreak that only ford's journal entries can make me feel. godddddddddddddd -GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -i've always stood by, ford loved bill but bill only saw ford as someone easy to manipulate and, yeah, absolutely seduce, but that bill very much never felt the same way -and I still generally stand by it but also. wow yeah ford was very. special and exciting and desirable to bill. his idiot his genius his perfect vessel and partner, better than anyone else bill ever tried to use before him. and bill was very much enamored by how much ford revered him and wanted his company -THE. THE FUCKING KARAOKE PAGE?????????????????? -hand to my mouth, wide-eyed in horror -right up there with the sinking, heart-wrenching experience of the 'my muse lied to me' pages in journal 3

-"but then he'll disappear for weeks, months at a time, and i am left to wonder. has it all been in my head? and if it has...would that be enough?" FORD.........................

-ford: are we still partners? bill: LOOK YOU'RE THE ONE CAVORTING WITH A HILLBILLY me: y'all. i swear to god.

-bill: no i was soooooo totally fine when ford locked me out of his mind and his life and stopped doing what i wanted him to do soooooooooo okay with it ahahahahaha the police report: he was NOT FINE

-"I know sixer secretly loved our 'will-they-won't-they-destroy-the-world' relationship. this was just his way of keeping things spicy!" BILL

-bill: i will NOT talk about the removed henchmaniac (who i swear to god looked like fucking JHESELBRAUM????? it has to be jheselbraum.) but LET ME GIVE YOU ALL THE HOT DEETS ABOUT GETTING BETRAYED AND STABBED IN THE BACK BY A HUMAN. UHHH I MEAN. WOW WHAT AN ASSHOLE, HUH???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-bill: i'm totally gonna be on the lookout for My Prophesied Enemy. They Will Definitely Not Get Me! No Sir!!! -also bill: WOW WHAT A TASTY HUNK OF HUMAN SURELY PINNING ALL MY DESIRES ON HIM WILL NOT BACKFIRE ON ME IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER. THIS WAS NOT A PROPHECY OF MY DEMISE BUT SURELY MY SUCCESS!!!!!!

-mabel: BILL SOUNDS LIKE A CREEPY EX BOYFRIEND me: mabel my beloved mabel it's mabel my blorbo i love her so much and she's RIGHT

-dipper and mabel: you tried to kill my sibling and if i ever see you again it's On Sight Murder :) me: i love them :') oh my god :') my babies :')

-mabel in journal 3: i found this note where bill was gonna make dipper kill himself so that's horrifying ford in journal 3's missing pages: he literally could have made me kill myself so that's a thing that's happening -AND THEN BILL TRYING TO CALL STAN AND SAYING IT TOO

-oh my god and mcgucket!!!!!! and ford's crush on him too and their college photograph and fiddleford making him gloves and trying multiple times to make them, and making him a snowglobe and them celebrating the holidays together and just :(

-bill giving ford rats vs mcgucket giving him mittens. and fiddleford DIDN'T EVEN GET HIS WIFE A CHRISTMAS PRESENT

-and ford finding dipper and mabel's footprints from the time traveler's pig outside his door and looking to see if there were any kids lost in the woods my whole fucking heart oh my god :(

-bill: YOU GOT 72 HOURS, I'M GONNA SEND SOMEONE TO STEAL YOUR EYES MAN, NOT KIDDING ford to stan when he arrives: DID YOU COME TO STEAL MY EYES????? me: god nothing does tasty callbacks and everything like gravity falls. i love it so much -like he's so GOOD at revealing the right things about a story at the right time and place but NEVER revealing too much. never saying everything. there's clearly always more but we will never get it all. which is so nice -like i was READY after all this time to get a couple more details but nothing concrete. and i love it so much and it's just -aaaa! -anyway!!!!

-bill: see i went no contact with my home dimension, they were holding me back me: oh bill's the kind of guy who goes to therapy and uses the like, "therapy buzzwords" wrong, you know what i mean? me: and oh god he's not even IN therapy yet

-wendy dreaming about her mom :( -pacifica having nightmares about not breaking her family's cycle of abuse :( -HEY. HEY WHAT ARGUMENT DID DIPPER OVERHEAR. HELLO???????????????? -was that brought up in journal 3????? i do not remember and i gotta go back through bill to do the decoding so i can't reread journal 3 right away but fuck i really want to now -but also HELLO OKAY WHAT WAS THAT ARGUMENT ABOUT?????????????

-so fascinated. intrigued. wide-eyed about the parallel universe dipper and mabel part. universes where the pines family didn't win........all those different versions of them........

-"THEN HEADBUTT THE MIRROR TO SHOW HIM WHO'S BOSS!!!!" -ahahaha.......haha..............ha...........................

-ROBERT RENZOBBERT SR AND "the gentleman's two-handed hooting bird removal scoop" oh my god -and pitt bros!!!!!!!!!

-"in lieu of an answer, stanley submitted a drawing of a possum with a knife." SHANKLIN THE STAB POSSUM!!!!!! SHANKLIN THE STAB POSSUM MY BELOVED IT'S SHANKLIN THE STAB POSSUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-ford: i was whistling a 1960's tune. james and bobby, i believe? me: wait like the boys????? like my boys????? like the dream of james hurley and bobby briggs in their silly boy band???????????? oh nah probably not. me: /googles google: behold! james and bobby purify singing i'll be your puppet me: OH NO. FUCK. OH MY GOD. OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

-the fucking sticky notes oh my god

-okay finally did all the decoding -- was able to get bill's language myself which was so much fucking fun (minus 4 letters that i just think aren't used at all???) and i had to look up the runes. then as i was translating them i realized the alphabet was IN the book which i had never fucking considered and REALLY SHOULD HAVE. thanks hirsch!!

-oh my god the two owl house references in the runes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! awww..........

-okay i think i decoded everything. i think. i THINK i have spent all day doing it and i'm tired. god what a glorious experience

[thinkingjasico]

Ok so I don't have other mutuals into PJO but I must confess I've been thinking about a scenario. Gender bend Jasico with Nico as the scary goth girl and Jason/Julia being the local prom queen and they maybe are roommates and fall in love. Have I watched the wicked trailer 200 times? Mayhaps. But I just think it kinda fits them, and I love to make my faves lesbians so. Yeah.

I love this! It also makes me think of an coffee shop AU!

Nico is a barista at this very charming café on campus. She's always very quiet; studying or reading on the other side of the counter when the café is not very busy. Julia always has a million things to do during the day, so she lives off coffee and has been a regular custumer there since her first year in college, until now, in Julia's second year, Nico starts working there and Julia not only becomes terrifyingly fascinated by her, but also obsessed with the playlists Nico puts on during her shift. Julia seems very confident to others, but in reality she's not at all confident about these things; which means that for the entire first semester that year all she said to Nico was: “good afternoon”, “an espresso, please” and “thank you” . She ventured to comment on the rain once, but Nico didn't hear with the noise of the coffee machine, so Julia didn't venture to say anything more.

But when the winter break arrives, Julia's roommate tells her that from January she won't be able to live with her anymore because she's moving in with her girlfriend (Piper and Annabeth? Who knows…).

The problem is: Julia has to share the rent. The person who helps her with the bills, since she has a full scholarship to college, is her older sister Thalia--- who never went to college but has her own business, and neither of the girls has any relationship with their parents. Also, Julia hates the college dorms because she had a horrible experience living there in her first month of college. Her roommate was always taking boys there and ignored her requests to stop doing that, so Thalia said she could pay half of a cheap rent for her, so she could concentrate on her studies (I don't even need to say that for Thalia, Julia is the most perfect creature ever to walk the earth and she would kill and die for her sister to have a good life and not have to go through the things she went through).

Anyway, she's desperate and put up notices all over the college buildings, because if she doesn't find someone to share her apartment, she'll have to move out at the beginning of January. But the campus is practically empty, it's unbearably cold and she should have gone to California to spend the end of the year with her sister already. She goes to the café, upset and anxious, and for the first time she doesn't think about Nico as soon as she walks through the door. Instead of going straight to the counter, she sits down at a table in the corner of the empty café, takes off her wet coat and beanie and leaves her flyers on the table. She's reaching for her cell phone to text Thalia and tell her she won't be able to travel until she's sorted this out; when a cup is placed on the table. She looks up and sees that it's an espresso. She looks up more and sees that Nico is standing there, with her long, black, wavy, voluminous hair tucked behind her pierced ears, and her painted black lips with a piercing in the middle say: “I saw this flyer in the English building today.”

It was just those words.

The flyer had many ways of contacting Julia, with all her social media accounts there so you could see the image of perfection that everyone had of her. Maybe all the problems that would ruin her end of the year and her next semester would be solved now, but all Julia could think was: She knows my order?!

Julia nods, “Yes, I'm looking for someone to share my apartment with. It's right near the campus entrance. The building is pretty old, and I live on the sixth floor, with no elevator, but the apartment is nice, I promise. I'm not noisy or messy and I don't have any pets.” She could have shut up after explaining the location of the building, which was already in the flyer, instead of saying it all in one breath like that, but anyway… “Do you know anyone who would be interested?” Please be you, please be you…

Nico glances to the counter, “I lived in the dorms at first, but my roomate was the most shitty person I've ever met. So I moved into the second floor of the café; not exactly with Luke's permission at first, but when he found me there he let me stay until New Year's.” She turns back to Julia and says nothing more, so Julia assumes that the person interested in the place is Nico herself.

There was a possibility that Julia would fall in love and spend the rest of her college years suffering in silence for that girl, but even if she only got to be friends with Nico, that would be enough for her.

Julia smiles and holds out her hand to Nico to close the deal. "It seems we were fated for each other then." And that was precisely why usually Julia only said the same things to Nico. "I-I mean, destined to be roommates, you know? And solve our housing problems."

But, thank God, the girl didn't seem to pay much attention to what Julia said, because she seemed to be thinking about something, and didn't take Julia's hand. “Hm, I kind of adopted a stray cat that kept eating the café's garbage.”

Julia smiles more broadly; her hand still held out. “Great! Take the cat with you.” And then Nico gives what Julia would later learn is the beginning of a smile, and takes her hand. Julia is actually allergic to cats, but at the moment she couldn't even see it as a problem.

[buunicosplaytips]

How to survive your first convention

Conventions are the biggest part of the cosplay community, without conventions, there would be no cosplaying to begin with, if this is your first time going to a convention this all might seem overwhelming, but dont fret my friend because I'm going to tell you how to survive your first convention and hopefully you'll have a good con experience.

Drink a lot of water and eat food

Sometimes we get so caught up in the fun environment we're in that we forget to drink water or eat, but you have to listen to me when I say DRINK WATER AND EAT, overheating and dehydration are so common in the scene, and veteran cosplayers and con-goers will tell you the same thing when you're in an inclosed area with hundreds or maybe thousands of people in a hotel lobby or a panel and you've been walking all day your body will lose a lot of energy and in some worst case scenarios something like heatstrokes can happen, to stop this from occurring you should listen to your body and drink water or eat something.

2. Listen to your body

With crowded spaces, walking everywhere, so many things happening at once, etc, you can become overwhelmed, I've been going to cons since I was 10 and I still get overwhelmed at 20, the best way to enjoy the con is to listen to your body when it's becoming overwhelmed, whether that be anxiousness, tiredness, or even as simple as your feet hurting a little bit, you should listen to your body when it's telling you to rest up or to eat or drink if you don't you won't be able to enjoy the con without feeling tired or anxious, with most conventions there will be rest stations or just a quiet hallway for you to recuperate yourself.

3. Dont be too trusting

Conventions are a great way to make new friends, however some people have ill intentions and you need to be careful, usually my advice is to stay in the convention area, hang out with people around your age range, and if they ask you to go to their hotel room please dont go unless your fully sure their trustworthy and even then I wouldn't go, another thing is to go to cons with someone you trust so your not completely alone or at the very least tell someone where you're going just in case.

4. Have basic hygiene

Now in the con scene, it's a little-known thing that some people don't have good hygiene and kinda stink up the place, now sometimes it can be medical conditions or something else. Still, mostly it's just people who don't know basic hygiene or don't care if you don't want to be this person, you need basic hygiene, for example, deodorant and showering after the day is great along with brushing your teeth, you don't need to be too fancy, as long as you don't smell your good.

5. Be courteous

With a big or small scene, you should be courteous, respect the venue, respect the people who work there, and respect other con-goers, you should also respect the people with vendors in the vendor hall and artist alley like putting products back, read the little notes that say not to touch, and not be dramatic about the prices, a small act of kindness goes a long way, so please be kind to everyone at the convention.

6. Always plan everything

Now this is me throwing in my two cents from experience, but I believe you should plan everything, or at least some things, planning on what panels to go to and planning on where and when to eat out is a good idea if you don't want to scramble during the last second, usually conventions have a little pamphlet or guide online of all the panels and events happening during the weekend so you can plan the day or weekend.

And with that, you have a small guide to surviving your first convention, now sometimes things can be unexpected and can dampen or ruin your con experience, sadly I don't have advice on unexpected outcomes but the best way to deal with it is to keep your head high and focus on the good if you can.

I hope this has been helpful, if you have any questions don't be afraid and ask me, my ask box is always open

[lover-of-mine]

thank you for all of your replies to our messages!!

i am holding onto the fact that tommy is eddie in a different font. honestly i wouldn’t put it past tim to brush it off as ‘it’s just why they’re good friends’ but no, no way. helicopter, army, cars, wrestling, martial arts, bit sassy, fuckin exact same dating advice to buck… paired with the whole ‘MY attention?’ ‘i guess’… that has GOT to be deliberate. eddie and tommy being basically the same person has GOT to come back around as a point for buck to realise or for someone else to bring up, because if it doesn’t, what was the point?? literally just so he and eddie can have friend things in common?? nah. i’m not denying that buck is into tommy/attracted to him, he clearly is, but also tommy is a safer version of eddie, one that wouldn’t ruin his life if the relationship went badly

the marisol of it all…. i’ve seen lots of speculation that she and eddie may be having emotional intimacy issues, issues getting to know eachother or being emotionally closer. which could be kinda interesting. i assume that’s what ryan was alluding to with that whole ‘finding out who she is’ thing. tim’s comments about eddie being unsure about ‘his place in the world’ are very interesting though

i hope you sleep soon!!

It's no problem, I'm happy to talk about the show, and honestly, it's been great to help me release the anxious energy I've been feeling about it. And honestly, Buck's first experience with a guy being with Eddie a step to the left and triggered because of Eddie is such a choice, because it didn't have to go this way, they didn't have to make him so similar to Eddie, they didn't have to involve the whole jealousy thing, they didn't have to make the jump ship comment, they could've just made Buck reach out to Tommy and them getting to know each other, yk? The way they literally said "what if made Buck's bisexual awakening under pressure but Eddie kisses him when he's being a brat" and I'm supposed to believe that's not about Eddie, like, PLEASE. Love that Buck has a safe space to explore this part of himself without the obvious panic that will follow when he realizes he might be in love with Eddie, but, like, everything about Tommy is also about Eddie, and that's such a choice. I do think Buck is attracted to Tommy, like, people get crushes, and sometimes a relationship is about learning something, not actual endgame potential, and I think that's what's happening here. But, literally, Tommy is a safer relationship where he can figure himself out in a "controlled environment" in a sense. And the Marisol of it all, I do see things going that way, them having trouble to connect in a deeper level, but that's something we will have to wait and see I guess. I am very curious about the "his place in the world" comment for sure. I need to know what it all means lol

And right now I'm just waiting for it to be an acceptable time for me to fall asleep and not wake up at like, 3 am, so I can take something for me to sleep because I will not sleep without help today sipakapakpakapak, but thank you 🩷

[dausy]

Back when the Barbie movie came out a couple of extremely girly hot-pink cafes opened. I didn't want to go by myself (when husband was deployed) because they seemed awfully crowded during Barbie and they're downtown and I hate trying to park in downtown areas. Anyway, my husband took me to brunch at one yesterday and it was fabulous. We had actually already heard the food was pretty blah but our iced coffes were all actually very good and glittery and cute. Everything was covered in pink and glitter. I'm glad I accidentally dressed appropriately. My one complaint about this city is nobody seems to believe in french pastries. Truly I want just want a good coffee and croissant. You can find a croissant but you can't get it at a coffee shop. If you do then the coffee isn't good.

We then visited the local Comic-con. I like to look but the second hand embarrassment always kills me. Its just not really the land of my peoples. I really wanted to catch glimpses of Patrick Warburton and Zachary Levi on camera but there were so many people, I felt anxious trying to pull out my phone. I was really hoping to find some sort of sailor moon figurine. I know I can purchase them online but I kind of wanted the real life shopping experience. One of my biggest con regrets was years ago, I went to a convention and somebody had a table of unique sailor moon merch. Everything from make-up to jewelry to action figures and just small collectors items. I really wished I had purchased some of the decorative pens and compacts. I've never been to another con like it. This convention, while we are in a large city, is not the biggest convention I've been to. I think the coolest booth I found was for Teeturtle. I did find this little simba figuring which Id never seen in real life before. There was another disney 100 one but panicked at the price of both figures together and didn't buy both.

after that my husband wanted to go to a Gun show ('merica!) and I think he was a little disappointed with it. I was just kind of fascinated because it was inside a freemason hall and I'd never been in one before and it was really weird. They didn't have that many guns. They actually had a lot of scentsy and those adhd bubble fidget toy booths haha. I also saw just as many porn books there as I did at the anime convention.

but in any case the weather was actually gorgeous for once. I just enjoyed being out of the house. We also had a post wide yard sale and we drove around a bit looking at items we dont really need. We also stopped at an alterations place to get my ball gown fitted. I procrastinate too much and the dress I was eyeing was out of stock so I just chose..one of the bajillion others I saved on pinterest and it came in the mail within 24hours but alas..I have short legs and its too long.

I have poor sense of time and didn't realize our ball is in like 2 weeks..and now I have to figure out what to do about my hair. Im going to make last minute hair and pedicure appointments..or do what I did the last time and just do everything myself and wonder what I would look like if I was professionally prettied.

also, we went to a baseball game last weekend and my horrible sunburn is starting to peel off. My entire forehead and ears are flaking in small chunks going up into my scalp. Its a lot of fun.

I did film for youtube and I feel like I have enough extra stuff for a life vlog which is everything I listed here so its probably ruined.

also our facility owner apparently hates me again for something he did that I didn't do so I'm yet again counting days of which its appropriate to have a gap in my resume before we move from here.

[cartoon-buffoon]

Because I rarely show any of my other interests here I thought it'd be neat to briefly talk about my love for anime.

Now while I am called cartoon buffoon for my deep love for rubberhose toons, I appreciate the japanese style of animation with two of my favorite animes being JoJo's bizarre Adventure and Dragon Ball Z & Super—I never watched original dragon ball or GT. I'm of Mexican descent so me liking dragon ball is just second nature, it's destiny. But JoJo's also is something I adore because of all the music references and the fights which I find super entertaining as their a sort of battle of wits. Like seeing someone like Josuke outsmart a stand that's objectively more powerful than crazy diamond or Girono utilizing Golden Experience to its fullest is something that made a younger me go fucking crazy and scream. I do like other series for example I've seen a bit of one punch man, I watched full metal alchemist however I never saw the stuff that came out that was based on the manga (since the original anime caught up to the manga and went in its own direction). As a sonic fan Sonic X just cause it's Sonic, ya know. I tried and I mean I TRIED to get into one piece but like... My attention span isn't cut out for that lol. The ghost stories dub is something I find hilarious, I'm an edgy bastard I know. Oh and Kill La Kill is also something I hold dearly because even as an aro-ace who doesn't find human characters in fiction attractive I actually can appreciate it's fights and humor while not really being phased by its not so subtle and EXTREME fan service.

This is just kinda a ramble about some of my other interests but yeah. Also if you're curious when it comes to my favorite characters in Dragonball—other than Beerus who is a sexy cat god of destruction who'd I let ruin me—I absolutely ADORE Broly and his canon iteration in Super

Like I love OG Broly who is ya know, a fucking DEMON and unit who only lost to main character Goku is the MC and some Deus Ex Machina of classic "lend me your energy!", I love super Broly because I'm a person who suffers from violent thoughts and anger issues so to see a gentle giant character who genuinely doesn't like to fight despite being a Sayian but is still capable of outbursts if provoked or when needed resonates with me. Like I obviously don't have the power to match my anger like Broly does but when I have an outburst or when my anger fuses with a manic episode it hurts not really having any control over what I do and when I finally calm down I take accountability for everything I do and it makes me feel awful. Also for the people who I talk to and are (somewhat) friends with on here you know I'm very meek, easily frightened, and anxious lol. So ya know I love DBS Broly, my second favorite Broly iteration.

(first is DBZ abridged Broly Movie Broly. "PRINCESS TRUNKS!" Was legit a vocal stim of mine and his character in that movie is better than his crazy psycho character in the actual Broly movie)

Anyways that's all for now, just brief talk of who I am and some other interests ya know

[playingforever]

your streams was my first impression of little nightmares so i was going in Blind, but i had been interested in getting into it for a while so im very glad you streamed it! anyways, i had a little confusion when earlier in the game you were like.. "lol, foreshadowing the timeloop.." and it made me so O-O UNTIL I SAW THE VERY END AND REALIZED: wow thin man is mono. i was soo shocked. so, OnTo the question, what was your first reaction to finding out thin man was mono like? were you shocked, not shocked, expected it, etc? how did avvy feel, too? it was such a nice plot twist so im very curious !!! - retrospring ask [link]

Hahuuu~ ah I'm amused that this was your experience, I'm um glad if our errant commentary as we were playing wasn't like ruining the experience for you or anything kfkfk...

Me and Avvy were first watching Little Nightmares through some letsplays done by a vtuber girlie we like (Hiyo-chan, a member of KittenParty.) This was because, I'm actually quite sensitive and easily put-off my by horror, so the 'padding' of having a silly anime girlie play the game was helpful. I have nightmares easily (ironically enough...) so when I imbibe too much horror, I can be left ah, anxious, restless, unable to sleep, kind of plagued by my own mind for days... 9_9; My problem is, I'm also intrigued by horror concepts, due to my interests... so I've always been curious about Little Nightmares as a series, actually. It's just always been a big question of, if I could even handle the experience...

Typically, I like to go into games blind, and experience the narrative unfold in real time. I would have preferred experiencing LN this way, but alas, I couldn't steel myself to boot up the game once, even after having gotten it for free years ago. So in the end, it just was a serendipitous thing, that I was already watching a lot of streams from KittenParty members, and Hiyo-chan happened to have played LN1+DLC+LN2. I thought, sure, why not finally get into that...? Might as well, if I can't play it... Funny because, as casual putting on the stream was, I still would get so anxious I'd have to look away, and we had to make sure it wasn't too close to bedtime before watching... It was a slow process as a result. 9.9;

We got through LN1 and enjoyed the ending of that one. As we were watching LN2, it felt less 'tight' by comparison... hmm, like, less thematic?? As a result of no longer being in the singular environment of the Maw. We started to get this feeling like 'wait, what's the theme here? What's the point of this all?' So I remember we actually paused midway through the Hospital chapter (after dealing with all the Patients to get the fuses.) Anddd we just like, reconvened, read ahead to see what the ending was. Hmm, it's a little funny looking back... because I remember we were simply feeling like 'ehh, is this all worth it?' ... where are we going... Mm but this happens sometimes, I mean I had to stop my playthrough of OMORI and spoil the ending for myself, because I was starting to feel unsure if it was 'worth it' to continue sitting through. TBH, it doesn't even have to be that a game is Bad, I'm just umm a sensitive person so, I think the more invested I am in something, the more I'm wary about being overly invested & then being disappointed by the outcome... [sniffs] And well, I'm also fussy and picky, so I can admit that sometimes I am impatient to learn whether or not something is going to feel like a Waste of Time... Much to read and watch you know, don't wanna lose braincells to frustrating things.

... all that said... Learning about Mono becoming the Thin Man was intriguing. And umm, amusing also, loll like, wait, whahhh? Why is the little lad becoming slenderman what's up with that... Watching footage, the scenes involving the Thin Man were simply cool, I liked the feel to them. What does it mean that the enemy that Mono and Six face is actually Mono...? We finished watching the game and then dwelled on it, some. This way of processing the twist meant that it kind of came to me 'slowly'... I wouldn't say I really felt the impact of playing it all in a continous sitting & then receiving it. However, it's meant that over time, I've appreciated more and more, the sequence of events leading to that reveal. I think everything from Six being kidnapped > confrontation with the Thin Man > Signal Tower + destroying Monster Six's music box > the finale of Mono being dropped & steadily becoming Thin Man... All very compelling-!! I suppose, I think it walks you through all the emotions you're SUPPOSED to feel...

'NOO nooo not Six!! Ooh give her back... I'll save you Six!! This awful ghoul has taken you from me... Whoa-!! These crazy powers I am gaining...?? Ohh.. Oh noo Six what happened to you? Eh... ahh... break her music box?? ;; Ahhrh is this right? But, I guess I have to do it... NOO Six whyyy?? Why did... o-oh. Oh, okay, I guess, I guess that's, why...'

And ultimately I must enjoy what it says about Mono, that at the end of this journey... He, simply chooses to perpetuate this cycle, that with all the knowledge of what's happened, he will still be stuck in this loop. It's a satisfying ending that retroactively makes the game more interesting to rewatch, again and again... Really, I feel that LN2 did so good at what it set out to do, that even the events of LN1 are more compelling because of it — even if, initially, I was feeling that 1 had a stronger experience.

I guess you can just imagine me and Avvy really pouring over this stuff, spiritually swirling our wine glasses, discussing it for days on end... Really enjoye it. Enough that it has motivated me to, essentially overcome my paralyzing fear of the game, and instead just receive it as a fun story. Enough that I had to play it myself! XD Soo strange to think about really... that hasn't happened before.

[desultory-suggestions]

Hi, good afternoon! I've been kinda lonely for a while and I finally was able to admit it to my family so I could get some help. However, I'm not really good at dealing with strangers. Would you happen to have any advice on making friends?

Hello, love! I'm so proud of you for reaching out to your family for support. Loneliness is such a hard thing to work through, especially well, alone! Making friends is tricky when you're already anxious in social situations.

Finding situations in which you are already in your element can help reduce feelings of anxiety and a lack of confidence when meeting new people. I am very out of my element at a party. However, I am very comfortable in a book club. If you have a comfortable jumping-off point making friends gets a lot comfier!

Having someone you already know with you can also help. Going alone to a new place can be harder than going with a family member. Look for a lot of different types of activities. Online groups, in-person, sports, games, art, travel, anything you want. Local groups and clubs are a great pre-planned social scene. Rock-climbing groups, tea enthusiasts, beginner art clubs. They're a great opportunity to meet someone with common interests!

Creating the life you want can also naturally attract friends. Go to the places you've always wanted to even if you go alone. Explore new topics and experiences, and allow yourself to live excitedly. I've met many people who are now very important to me because I showed up where I wanted to be, and they noticed.

Allow yourself some awkwardness. If we constantly overanalyze, yes we will think we made every encounter awkward. I can think of 1000 awkward moments with my new acquaintance S, who I really wanted to be friends with! Well, you know what? We've been dating for a year now and live together, so clearly some silly moments didn't ruin anything.

Practice good self-care. You can be scared of meeting new people, that's allowed! You can do the thing scared. There's no rule saying you must be 100% confident and perfectly charming. Remember that people around you want to be your friend! You are not invisible, and more often than not people who want to be your friend are only staying quiet because they are scared too. Every day people think "Wow that person seems really cool! I wish I knew them" and you just don't realize!

Keep working towards the experiences you want, you have and will have so many people who love you!

Best,

Evan