#and i'm not even going to be dead! i'm just going to sleepwalk around the whole time and never be a person again

[moinsbienquekaworu]

I thought about working a 9-5 for the next 45 years of my life and all of my love for life has evaporated

[tofixtheshadows]

Id love to hear ur interpretation and analysis on falin! She’s one of my favorite characters and and I was wondering what ur thoughts on her are

Man, I struggle to think of anything I could say about Falin that others have not already said. But she's one of my favorite things about Dungeon Meshi too.

So much of the story revolves around Falin, and she's not even there. Tumblr loves to talk about haunting the narrative, but Falin might be one of the best examples of it ever put to page. She's dead. She's alive. She's dead. She's alive. She's alive but she's missing, she's alive but she isn't herself. She's dead but she might wake. She's dead but she's frozen in ice. She's alive but she's sleepwalking. They chase her ghost and they chase her body all through the story.

I think what Kui does with her is fascinating. Not just as character with a personality we can analyze, but as an object in a narrative- that's why I say she's one of my favorite things about the story, because I also mean it in a mechanical sense. As a writer, Kui's really good at misdirection- that is, setting you up to believe or expect something about a character or a plot, and then turning that on its head. It's most apparent with Kabru, but it works really well with Falin too.

Because the precious little sister is a very well known character archetype, right? So is the gentle healer. The heart of the party. The white mage girl. The damsel in distress. The martyr.

And this isn't a Laura Palmer situation, where we find out that beneath her wholesome surface there's something dark and troubled. No, Falin truly is a kind and gentle person. That isn't where the misdirection leads (and that, too, I think, is another misdirection- it's not "Plot twist, she isn't as nice as you thought!", which would almost be too easy).

The misdirection here is more about structure than about character (but also, yeah- a little about character).

What I mean is, with these archetypes firmly in mind, along with a whole other host of fantasy genre expectations, I think anyone who goes into Dungeon Meshi un-spoiled probably expects Falin's rescue to be an endgame event; at least on a subconscious level, where you're not really thinking about it but in the back of your head you're already stretching out the story to place Falin firmly in the distance. Fire breathing dragon at the bottom of the dungeon is perfect final boss material, right? Slay the dragon. Rescue the princess.

And Falin is the perfect prize in the traditional old school fantasy that the concept of the titular dungeon is a send-up to. Blonde (white), soft-spoken, sweet-natured, beloved by everyone. An angelic figure.

Maybe that's why Ryoko Kui gave her white wings.

It is sort of jarring when chapter 23 rolls around and it's already time to fight the red dragon. And it takes a few chapters, but they succeed. And then Falin's impossible resurrection succeeds. But by then you guess that this is not going to be the story you expected it to be.

I want to point out that Falin spends a lot of time getting, well, babied, post-resurrection. Marcille washes her in the bath, despite Falin stating that she's capable of washing herself. Marcille schools her about her mana use despite Falin demonstrating that she is not hurting for mana, and brushes aside Falin's explanations. Both Marcille and Laios refuse to actually tell her what happened. Laios scruffs up her hair like she's a little kid and scolds her for something she can't remember doing. Marcille explicitly calls her a little kid when Falin tries to talk about how much she's grown.

Of course I'm not saying that Laios was wrong to act like a big brother, or that Marcille shouldn't be worried about taking care of her shell-shocked friend in the bath. But the framing of it clearly shows a Falin who is struggling to be heard.

If you'd like to address the big gay elephant in the room while we're here, I want to state for the record that- whether you read her as gay or not -I think Marcille is completely oblivious during this. Because Falin is her little friend from school. Her best friend, yes, but also the young tallman student she, in her infinite elven wisdom, had to mentor and look after. Marcille has not yet accepted that Falin is an adult now, nor has she accepted that she, herself, is only barely past teenagerhood developmentally and is not nearly as mature as she believes. Of course she'd scrub Falin in the bath and fuss over her.

Falin, meanwhile, seems more than aware of her own adult body and the inappropriate way Marcille is treating it.

The mana-sharing scene is, I think, Falin trying to get a little of her own back. How do you like it, Marcille?

And she tries again in bed.

Maybe she's wondering if their relationship will change now that they're grown ups. If Marcille prefers her as a little girl, or at least as a woman who lets herself be guided like one; if Marcille will react badly if Falin keeps trying to assert herself. She also might be subtly trying to signal to Marcille that bed sharing, like bathing, carries a different weight to it when you do it as adults rather than as children.

With all this in mind, the decision to turn Falin from the precious prize they rescued into to the vicious dragon they have to slay, hits a lot harder.

Falin with a powerful, monstrous, destructive body. Falin, who couldn't even stand to cause people pain from using healing spells, slaughtering half a dozen people in brutal ways. And that's not her, she's being mind-controlled, but as an object in the story she has completely flipped. From damsel to threat.

And I love that she carries a little bit of that with her when she's resurrected again.

Because she's no longer the girl who's going to let herself be stifled by her brother's and her best friend's co-dependency, no matter how much she loves them. She's different now: stronger, eyes open, forging her own path instead of following in their wake. Falin is still going to come back to them again, but this time it won't be because they chased her. It'll be because they let her go.

[bbluefllame]

hcs on how I think mha characters sleep

contains: pure silly stupidness

characters: tomura shigaraki, touya todoroki, keigo takami, izuku midoriya, toga himiko, plus one katsuki hc😭

note: LISTEN GANG I WAS SLEEPY BUT I COULDNT SKEEP SO I WAS LIKE OH EM GEE!!! keigo's went out of hand 😔😔😔

tomura shigaraki

- he usually sleeps in his normal attire, he has no energy to get up and change

- sleeps 4 hrs MAX

- his thumbs are always I mean always are covered by the rest of his fingers tightly, he probably decays mattresses every couple of months by accident

- either super light sleeper or super heavy no in-between, probably doesn't even sleep most of the time

- there's no pre-sleep routine. mf just plops down into the bed and blacks out OR he sleeps in his gaming chair😭

- if you're sleeping next to him, he would make sure he's facing the opposite side with his hands dangling at the edge of the bed just to make sure nothing happens to you.

- one thing that makes him black out is playing with his hair, like blackout like snore mimimimi type shit

- he's so still in his sleep, barely moves to the point you might think he's dead if he wasn't breathing‼️

- Overall he'd be a pretty good person to sleep next to (if he even sleeps) just make sure he doesn't have nightmares or everything is done and dusted (literally)

touya todoroki

- he either sleeps naked or something that can't snag on the staples/ irritate his scars (probably naked bcs have you seen his room?? ITS EMPTY EMPTY THERES NOTHING BESIDES HIS USUAL CLOTHES)

- I give him 5-6 hrs maybe then he wakes up but on nights where he's in too much pain, he takes a shit ton of painkillers and tries to sleep just to wake up 2 hrs later

-biggest snorer out there, complete opposite of tomura. esp w those lungs of his omg.

- you could be sleeping and BOOM 🚉 SNOREEEEEE HONKKKK you need earplugs with him, then he wakes up and goes "I don't snore, fuck you mean??"

- he tosses and turns 24/7 also he will 100% steal the blanket and kick you off, at this point it'd be more comfortable to sleep on the ground than to sleep next to him

- yk those videos where it's like someone tweaking while sleeping, like they roll around steal blankets and kick and stuff and do the craziest shit, yeah that's touya

- idk if he has a pre sleep routine I'm leaning towards it depends? he usually just makes sure his scars are clean so he doesn't get an infection and yk die!

- I conclude, a horrible person to sleep next to. Would much rather kms than tolerate a night of his torture!

keigo takami

- this bitch has 2 options, blackout the second he gets home in his hero attire, or if it's a day where he has to recover from an injury or something, these specific navy blue sweatpants and a black t-shirt

- depends on the day he's sleeping either 3 hrs or 9 hrs

- he doesn't snore but he talks in his sleep about the weirdest shit ever "noooo pls don't put me in the airfryer" he 100% has the weirdest fucking dreams to ever exist

- he never sleeps on his back, literally always on his stomach so his wings don't get in the way

- also on the topic of his wings, during said weird dreams if he's running away or something they start flapping and shit😭 it'd be so annoying to sleep next to him

- he sleepwalks 100% you look at that face and tell me he DOESNT?? he's a really light sleeper as well esp for nights where he might be called in

- definitely has a pre sleep routine (if he doesn't immediately blackout) ESP if you're living tg oh em gee, he'd have a longer skincare routine than you (tbf the skincare routine is kind of obligation from him to appeal to the civilians nd shit)

- he'd have a headband on his head pushing his hair back, washing his face, using a toner etcetera, and then going "baaaaaabeeee where'd you put my cosrx snail mucin, I know you used it" and he'd be all sassy and shit (twink cough cough sorry)

- if he's having a calm day, he's being the clingiest cutest little shit, you wanna go to eat? "nooo 5 minutes" . You wanna go to the bathroom? "Ugh be quick" while he's guarding the door waiting to tackle you and drag you back to bed. He's such a little (loving) shit

- he just lays there on top of you not willing to let go with a serene expression on his face, those days are rare though (fuck the commission 😠)

- random but he has some of the worst bed head you could ever see

- overall, kind of annoying to sleep next to (funny as well) but for him, who wouldn't tolerate it 🙏🏼

izuku midoriya

- before OFA bro used to get no sleep he'd have the most fucked up sleep schedule to ever exist ‼️‼️ like during weekends no sleep at all just staying up analyzing new heroes

- w OFA he's sleeping healthily or too much with the amount of energy he uses ESP in the first seasons when he breaks his bones a shit ton

- HIS SLEEP WEAR LMAOAOA funniest thing I've seen i don't have to say anything abt it 😭 a fucking shirt w " t-shirt" on it or sumn

- doesn't snore but moves a lot, and not even kicking?? just flipping side to side or clutching the blanket like he's a woman clutching her purse in the 1800s (no one's taking it from you calm down lil bro)

- occasionally he might talk but it's like 2 words then he flips to the other side

- no pre-sleep routine but that's bc he doesn't need one, his pre-sleep routine is studying or training, BUT bro has to be like wrapping his arms and hands at night or something bcs he's in pain (his arms are fucked up there's no way he doesn't have chronic pain)

- if you're forced to sleep next to each other (insert ur own fanfic idea of why) he would be so tense he'd have his hands by his side tryna not sleep so he doesn't annoy you, at this point, you'd be annoyed by how tense he is

- he's not a bad person to sleep next to tbf, just like he might be kinda annoying that's it

Toga Himiko

- she has pink pj's and everything she's such a cutie (some have blood on them but whoops accident!)

- she sleeps with plushies (her room is adorable. search it up pleek‼️), changes the plushie every night so "every single one of them feels loved"

- she sleeps pretty healthily although on the low side 6-7 hrs prolly, she's told by compress "You're a growing girl, you need your sleep" or something similar when she wakes up too early

- she's more giggles in her sleep rather than anything, maybe whispers a name then goes teehehehe, she's pretty calm in her sleep honestly

- she has a pre-sleep routine and it's adorable, if it's in the broke era she steals face masks (specifically hello kitty ones), moisturizers, toners, face washes and skips back to the base with a smile on her face

- has 100% forced a couple of the league members to use the face masks

- has music blasting (for some reason I see her playing like a g6 and bopping her head while putting stuff on) at 10 pm, she 100% has been forced to turn it off bcs it woke everyone up

- she's such a cuddly person as well but in the best way possible, before sleeping though 100% there's gonna be gossiping or just yapping tg

overall my favorite !! silliest girl to ever exist I luv her

bonus katsuki

- bro sleeps like a Victorian child dying from the plague, waiting for a true loves kiss type shit you'd see him and go "wtf okay disney princess😟"

[projectcaramel]

Do you have sleeping headcannons for the side characters? I wanna know their sleeping habits, what they would wear, or how heavy of a sleeper they are. ♡

-- Caramel: I might have some, yes. If by "side characters," you're referring to Raphael et al., I can't really give you good headcanons because I'm not far enough along in the games to have gotten to know them beyond a few lines of dialogue in events, but I can give you my opinion on the former undates. --

Sleeping headcanons for former undates + Luke:

Diavolo

Sleeps on his back, generally, but he tends to roll around.

Grabs things that come close. Pillows, people, phones, doesn't matter. If he can hold it, he takes it and doesn't let go, particularly if it's soft.

Sleeps like a hibernating bear. If he's not ready to wake up yet, chances are you'll be clanging pots and pans to get him out of bed. Despite this, he is a morning person once he shakes off his grogginess.

His sleepwear usually consists of a silk robe, but it's not unusual for him to decide to sleep with just a pair of boxers on.

Barbatos

Often power-naps while standing up; when he actually goes to his bed, he curls up into positions that look intensely uncomfortable, but he apparently finds them relaxing.

Once he is asleep, he does not move; once, Diavolo called a doctor in terror because he thought Barbatos was dead.

Liable to wake up at any point during the night, particularly if he hears anything resembling a mouse squeak. If you rap on the wall, he'll open his eyes and ask you what you need. I.e. Barbatos requires a DO NOT DISTURB sign despite his protests.

Takes his shoes, tailcoat and tie off, but he otherwise does not change his clothing to sleep

Simeon

Sleeps on his side with his hand buried under the pillow his head is on.

Because he often sleeps dangerously close to the edge of his bed, Luke will sometimes wake up to a loud THUD because Simeon dropped onto the floor (and continues to sleep afterwards.)

Generally keeps a very strict habit of sleeping for eight hours, partially on Luke's account. He usually wakes up in the middle of the night at least once a month and randomly starts texting someone like Leviathan.

Sleeps with blue, button-down pajamas decorated with clouds with a matching eye-mask. He cannot sleep unless it's completely dark.

Luke

Sleeps in fetal position under a lot of blankets, even if he's sweating (something about being afraid of demons clutching his ankle, or not afraid or whatever)

Has a habit of sleep-talking, sometimes saying sweet things about Simeon or Barbatos.

He usually sleeps soundly the entire night, but there are occasionally nights where he stays wide awake, either due to anxiety or excitement. Oddly, he tends to wakes up very punctually.

His sleepwear is very much similar to his dad's Simeon's, although many of the clouds are well-defined and have happy faces on them (He wanted the ones without faces, but they were not in stock).

Solomon

Sleeps on his stomach most of the time, more often than not with a weighted blanket on top of him.

Accidentally casts minor hexes and other spells in his sleep, so he occasionally wakes up to find Simeon huffing next to his bed with an empty cup and his bedframe a little burnt.

He sleeps quite well most of the time, but unfortunately, he often sleepwalks while doing so. He will occasionally find bruises in random places on his body and sometimes wake up somewhere completely random, like a jewelry shop.

He sleeps without a shirt and typically wears a loose pair of pants to bed. This occasionally annoys Luke, who thinks it's a little indecent.

--and just because I know someone who snores and practically shakes the foundations of any living space he goes into, no, none of them snore.

[obae-me]

ive been sick recently, here are some of the fever dreams and various other stupid thoughts ive had;

1. mammon and mc taking beel to the human realm to compete in eating challenges. he gets free food and they get to laugh at the horrified faces of the judges while he demolishes everything and asks for seconds

2. remember the golden age of a/b/o? demons have a higher sense of smell so when mc first arrived, there was a scent blocker in the summoning spell. This fails at some point and now mc has to hide out with solomon or else the brothers will follow them around like they’re the pied piper bc since when did mc smell so good?

3. mc convinving the brothers that humans molt by doing the pva glue thing. solomon is the only one who knows different and absolutely backs them up

4. freaking out the brothers by sleepwalking/talking. mc opening levi’s door in the middle of the night (he’s still awake, rui-chan just dropped a new episode he needs to analyse) and just dead staring at him for several seconds before barking and walking away. he avoids them for days after

5. going to the human realm and bring back a souvenir for diavolo every time. they’re usually the silly things you can buy when you visit tourist areas but they’re held in as high regard as the royal family heirlooms. a small snow globe with a sunglasses wearing gnome inside is displayed next to the royal jewels

6. sampling every different kind of tea with barbatos like a bucket list (chamomile? thumbs up! darjeeling? hates with a burning passion)

7. leaving offerings for the demons/angels out of habit whenever they do something nice. new beauty routine- asmo finds roses in his room. high grade on a paper- satan finds a small cat statuette on top of a pile of books. loaned a listening ear- simeon finds new pens in his writing desk

8. mc being affectionate without realising. humans can be big on physical contact so it’s can be common to kiss or hug regularly. demons are not like this and they short circuit everytime mc kisses their cheeks in thanks or hugs them in greeting

thank you for your time i’m going back to sleep

Oh no! I'm sorry you're sick! Drink tons of fluids and get so much rest!!

1. I bet you Mammon put some money down on him somehow and became absolutely giddy with how much Beel was winning. He would treat him to a buffet afterwards.

2. Ah yes, the wonderful and semi cursed days of a/b/o. I have no doubt that something about their human drives them all crazy.

3. I love love love the thought of MC and Solomon doing things that freak the demons and angels out a bit, mixing real things with fake facts and no one ever knowing what's true or not.

4. What if the brothers all assumed that only Belphie did stuff like that because of his Sin, and so when MC comes around and does similar things, it freaks them out a bit. Again, I love the idea of a human giving all the powerful demons a bit of the jeebies.

5. That is such a cute thing, oh my goodness. Diavolo being obsessed with cheap cliche tourist souvenirs. He's got mugs and shotglasses with different states and countries on them, the fridge in the kitchen has a bunch of magnets of various attractions. He's got several baseball caps he wears around the castle when people aren't around.

6. So sweet! I love the thought of Barbatos having a little notepad and writing notes on their reactions of different teas so he knows exactly what to serve them and when. (I love me a good earl grey myself).

7. As a person who loves giving gifts, this idea is so sweet. It's like a beautiful equivalent of getting a little gold star. They deserve good things, all of them.

8. I think I've done a headcanon of this particular thing (or maybe not, maybe it's just been on my mind before). But yes! Coming up and giving them a hug when they're sad, telling them they love them before hanging up the phone, all things that makes the demons melt instantly, and MC isn't even aware.

Thank you for sharing your dreams!! I love hearing about dreams! Rest up!!

[thriftedtchotchkes]

living in a state of dreaming

summary: it’s been a year since you, joel, and ellie returned to jackson, and you’re finally starting to feel a sense of security. but when the sun goes down and joel closes his eyes, the horrors beyond the walls still hunt him, out to take back the family he’s worked so hard to protect.

pairing: joel miller x reader

warnings: hurt/comfort (mostly comfort), nightmares, sleepwalker!joel, language, minor injury, mention of panic attacks, ellie struggles, post-season one

word count: 1.5k

a/n: inspired by my own sleepwalking adventures :') i've loved tlou since the first game came out, but the hbo show really made me wanna start writing again, so this is my first fic here! thoughts and feedback are super welcome and appreciated! 💕

“You still mumble in your sleep,” she says, worry lines marring her face as Joel shoots up and off the couch. His eyes are much too alert for someone who was dead asleep moments before. 

You meet Ellie’s gaze from across the room, her concern mirrored in your own. Joel had always suffered from nightmares, for as long as you’d known him, but it was so much worse now. Of course, Ellie notices. She may have moved into her own space out back, but she still watches Joel like a hawk, a side-effect of traveling together, of looking out for each other for as long as they had.

You can’t even begin to pinpoint the cause. Sure, he hadn’t loosened up much since your little group arrived in Jackson—he was still Joel, after all—but it had been a year. Ellie was safe, you were safe, and the delusion that nothing could ever harm you again was almost believable. 

But still, there he was every night, tossing and turning, mumbling evolving into screaming as he reached out for you in the dark. 

You do what you can, but your presence alone isn’t enough. You hold him in your arms, the warmth of his back against your chest a reminder that he's still here with you. "Joeljoeljoel," you murmur into his hair. He smells like suede and wood oil, and you squeeze him a little tighter. "I'm here, see? Go back to sleep, we're safe. Nothing here but you and me." 

He’s still trembling, but you can feel his heart rate calming. Just a brief respite until the monsters come for him again.

For a while, Joel tried not sleeping at all. He occupied his nights woodworking, your home slowly filling up with small statues of animals and cowboys, neatly sanded and coated in a fresh stain. He’d let the bite of guitar strings on his calloused fingertips distract him from the burning behind his eyes, the headache blooming in his temples. 

This isn’t sustainable and you both know it. But he’ll keep going, excuses falling from his lips that you and Ellie pretend to believe.

There’s not enough time in the day, he’d say. How do you expect me to finish fixin’ Ellie’s guitar, I made her a promise.

Ellie smiles for him, treads lightly as if she’s dealing with a child, and you think it’s probably a habit she picked up from the little time she had with Tess. It’s okay, Joel, there’s plenty of time for you to teach me. We’ve got forever, and she means it.

Ellie catches you before your shift one morning, her small hand circling your wrist. 

“We should probably talk about Joel,” she lets go and wraps her arms around herself like she always does when she’s upset. You let out a sigh and it feels like you’ve been holding it in for days. She shouldn’t have to worry about things like this. Joel would be furious with himself if he knew.

“Something’s freaking him out. I dunno, maybe you should ask him about it?” She sounds frantic now. “I mean, what if he starts getting those panic-things again and can’t breathe, or he has a fuckin’ heart attack and dies?” You do your best to reassure her.

“Kiddo, I promise he’s not going to die,” your thumb smooths the wrinkle in her brow. “I think he’s just been through a lot. We all have.” Ellie doesn’t look like she believes you; she wants a better answer than that.

“...Do you still get nightmares?”

Your mouth tips down and you glance away. The front door is open and the chill of the air makes you shiver. 

“Yeah, I do. But when I wake up, I know they can’t hurt me anymore,” you reply. She must still have them too, after the horrors she’s seen and lived. So much and yet so little time has passed, but Ellie’s scars are healing. 

The friends she’s made here make her smile and she laughs more. Her cheeks are fuller and her eyes are less clouded. But scars never fade completely.

She nods stiffly.

“I’ll talk to him, see if something happened.” You hug her and she thaws just a little. Ellie hasn’t really warmed up to physical affection, and you won’t push it. But sometimes she welcomes it when she needs the comfort.

“It wasn’t like this out there, I-...I don’t know,” you continue. “I don’t know what changed, but we’ll figure it out.”

You don’t, and it escalates.

Sunday is the first day Joel sleepwalks. He wakes up halfway out of bed, his foot catching on the sharp, wooden bed frame—the one he built himself, close to the ground just like you wanted—and he can feel the skin of his ankle twisting and tearing. 

He catches himself before he can crash to the ground and you’re on him in an instant. “Christ, Joel, are you okay?” 

“S’nothin’,” he grumbles, bleary-eyed and dazed. You move to check the damage to his foot and he swats your hands away, which doesn’t surprise you at all, but hurts nonetheless. 

The few times he let you patch him up were less a choice than a necessity, to say the least. A memory of Ellie with a syringe of penicillin, and you with a roll of duct tape and the cleanest rag you could find comes to mind, and so you let him go. “I got it, jus’ go back to sleep. Sorry for wakin’ you.” 

The door to the bathroom closes and you follow behind, resting your head softly on the door. It’ll get better soon, you tell yourself. It’s getting colder, winter’s on its way, and Joel’s just stressed about sorting out patrol duties; infected are more unpredictable this time of year. Once Tommy and his crew are back from the dam, it’ll be better.  

On Wednesday, his eyes are vacant as he grabs for the doorknob leading out of your bedroom, but it's gone, stolen away in the dark. He pounds his fists against the wood, desperately fitting his fingers in the gap between the door and the frame in a futile attempt to pry it open. 

You don’t fully comprehend what’s happening until the yelling starts, low grunts becoming frantic pleas. He’s calling out for you, for Ellie.

The lights flicker on, enough to make him aware of his surroundings, of reality. Joel’s chest is heaving, eyes sad as your hands take his, leading him back to bed.

It's Saturday when the front door slams open, startling you awake too early in the morning. The other side of the bed is still warm, frighteningly so, as your hand slams down on the sweat-dampened sheets where Joel should be. 

You’re too late to stop him from running out of the house into the cold, barefoot in the snow, as if something was chasing after him.

Joel can feel his heart pounding in his chest, hear the blood rushing in his ears like white noise, and he can’t seem to draw in enough air. He can't remember what he was running from, but its eyes in the shadows still haunt him. It’s all too much and his body finally reaches its breaking point.

It’s a terrifying sight, Joel dropping to his knees. His eyes are blank and he’s gone so, so quiet.

“Joel, please. You have to tell me what to do, tell me how to help you.” Resisting the urge to shake him feels so hard, but you have no idea how else you’re supposed to bring him back from this. He’s sinking into himself, hands tensing and untensing as he battles the urge to fight. 

You wonder if he can even hear you. 

The commotion hasn’t woken Ellie up, and you’re grateful. You don’t want her to see him like this.

“I let my guard down,” his gravelly voice catches you off guard. “This place is makin’ me weak.” Joel’s eyes are wet and your heart shatters. “Once you stop moving, it hits you all at once. The adrenaline’s gone, there’s no gettin’ it back.” His eyes find yours, and you’re frozen. “The fuck am I supposed to protect you like this?”

You sink to the ground to wrap your arms around him and the snow burns as it seeps through your threadbare pajama pants.

“There’s nothing coming for us, the Fireflies are gone. We got her back, okay? She’s ours now,” you murmur, words gentle even as you grip him tight, tethering him to right now. “And sometimes you have to let me protect you. Even from yourself, especially from yourself. That’s what we do, we keep each other going.”

Joel slumps, exhausted. His forehead drops to yours and his nose is cold as it bumps your own, breath warm and humid in contrast. 

“Trust us,” you hum against his lips, and the remaining tension leaves his body.

It’s not enough to stop the nightmares; they’ll never stop. But it’s enough for tonight. And when the monsters come again, you’ll be there to turn on the light.

thanks for reading! 💕

[jester-w-n0n4m3]

Ok so- the damn oneshot with Calupoh I've mentioned. . .

"Sleepwalker"

2:35 A.M.

Tw: implied self harm, maybe psychological horror? Idk if it's gonna count for derealization or something else. Drowning (metaphorically) would it count if I didn't know how to write a British accent?? 💀

I don't know if any warnings apply to this tbh 😭 so I'm sorry if it's gonna trigger something

I tried, I didn't feel like writing this tbh, I hope it's good.

. . .

It was dark.

Nothing anywhere, just a void of emptiness that surrounded him, as far as the eye could see, it was just darkness.

Was he dead? No, no... It wasn't that.

Calupoh got up from the ground or whatever it was he was now standing on and started to walk without any real sense of direction or a clue where he was going.

He heard voices, faded whispers of people, cries for help, false promises of things getting better, the faint crackling of flames somewhere where he couldn't see.

It felt cold, like the waters of the ocean. So cold that his breath fogged in the air, that the Lt felt his bones tremble and shake. . .

Why was he gasping for air? He couldn't breathe anymore. It felt like he was drowning, he felt something around his neck, his throat, it was cold.

Why were his hands bloody? Cuts adorning his forearms to accompany old burns from the past, all red and itchy and. . .

Quick, shallow and empty attempts of breathing all to no avail, to no results. Calupoh fell backwards, why did he fall? Did he trip on something or bump into something?

Hands holding his own shook him violently, but no one else was in the void... But it felt like there was but he just couldn't see

"WAKE UP!"

A gruff, thick British voice practically yelled at him, seeming panicked or frustrated, maybe even scared.

Calupoh gasped, tears welling up in his eyes and falling without a pause, a lump in his throat, looking around frantically like a scared animal with no way to escape before he realized where he was and calmed down just the tiniest bit. His breath ragged but slowly steadied as the hangover of sleep faded away from his fogged mind. He sniffled, wiping his eyes as the tears were getting to blur his vision.

He looked at who was the one behind the voice. Price, John Price... His Captain...

'Fucken' hell. . .'

The thought rang in the Lieutenant's tired mind. Glancing at his bloody arms, a knife in the sink of the kitchen.

That explained it.

Sleepwalking, again. Never was with knives before.

"Gave me a bloody heart attack, ya muppet." Price huffed with a shake of his head, tense but seeming relieved for Calupoh to be awake but concerned.

"On your feet, gotta get you cleaned up." The Captain spoke, maybe trying to be soft for once, to not be as tough and be more of a support to lean on.

Calupoh followed, without word or protest, and they went to the bathroom. John cleaned the blood away, disinfected the fresh cuts and gashes and bandaged them up to help with their healing.

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

Sleepwalking

Pairings: Jon Moxley x Reader

Warnings: +18

Tag: @theworldofotps , @writtingrose , @aerynscrichton , @daddyhausen , @melissahausen , @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin , @sophiewolfheart-blog , @sultryfandoms , @new-zealand-chic , @crowleysqueenofhell , @thealliasylum , @legit9thlunaticwarrior , @baysexuality , @josiewrites , @seeingstarks , @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch , @whenimakeitshine1234 , @moxkindagirl , @sunshinevirus , @im-just-a-mississippi-girl

🎶You’re the one that I want…

Across the large hall, amid evening gowns and tuxedos, he stood. Those intense blue eyes could not be mistaken by anyone other than himself, and even after two years they still held the same amount of power over her as they once did.

He always had the worst timing. Every time, without fail, he decided to reappear from the ashes like a Fenix after she somehow managed to get a hold of her life once again. A part of her thinks he does this on purpose, he has a silent pleasure in watching her suffer whenever he decides to show up in her life again. Whenever he decides to reclaim her body, her heart pays the price, but not this time.

She crossed the hall towards the dark corner of the room, confident steps guided her to him once more, to what she hoped to be the last time.

“Who let you come in? I don’t recall sending you an invitation” She stated. Her posture was impeccable, back and knees straightened, shoulders back, head never once looking down, hands confidently and delicately placed on top of each other in front of her stomach.

School me to what makes you shake shake it off…

She certainly changed, and that was the first thing Mox noticed when he instantly found her being the center of attention in a crowd of rich people. The confidence that once lacked in her was now abundant enough to be categorized as arrogance, and even from afar, Mox could tell that she had learned how to be one of them. She was incredibly smart and had a certain ease to adapt to the environment she was in, it was one of the qualities he most admired in her. She knew people from different social statuses, attended diverse gatherings and knew how to properly behave in all of them. But that wasn’t what surprised him the most, what did catch him off guard though was the wedding announcement in the gossip column of The New York Times.

“The public announcement was enough of an invitation for me. I didn’t know I would need a formal card asking me to come, although I have a feeling you wouldn’t want someone like me attending your high society party”

“Follow me” She demanded quickly, before turning around and taking the stairs up to the terrace.

Mox cackled as he followed her, his eyes roamed through her figure, drowning in the sight of the only woman who was able to keep him in check. The fancy clothes added to her natural royalty appeal, and that was the first thing that drew his attention to her in that indie wrestling show over 10 years ago: her royal aura. She was the princess that his bad boy self couldn’t wait to get a hold of, the proof that he could achieve something solid, good, and worthy in life even though he barely had money to keep himself alive.

Her heels stopped clicking once they reached the terrace, “Well” She turned around to face him, “What is it that you want this time, Jonathan?”

Though I'm degenerate he's the fool who's going to bore you to death…

“Jonathan?” Mox chuckled “Are nicknames not allowed in your world anymore, kitty? Are they too poor for your upper-class vocabulary?” He continued to stare at her and kept drowning in her beauty. She was still drop-dead gorgeous, only now her doll-like beauty had been covered by heavy amounts of makeup to make her lose her innocent appearance and gain more of a womanly look.

“Nicknames are reserved for friends” She shrugged lightly

“Am I not your friend?”

“You’re an acquaintance, Jonathan. Nothing more, nothing less. Just an acquaintance”

“Hmmm,” Mox hummed, his heavy boots now stomping on the hardwood floor as he took three more steps toward her until he was close enough to feel the warmth radiating from her skin.

“I don’t think acquaintances would do half the things we did, kitty cat”

“That’s in the past now, Jonathan. Things have changed”

“Did they though? Because I’m pretty sure I still have the same effect on you as you do on me” Mox’s fingers traced her exposed collarbone, and the electricity of his touch on her skin continued to be as alive as it ever was. The sparkle was still present, the desire, the attraction, the primal need, and the urge to get intoxicated in each other until nothing else existed survived the years and was as strong as ever.

“You’re wrong” She lied effortlessly as she did so many times before in front of the mirror whenever he abandoned her.

“Am I?” Mox wrapped his fingers at the base of her neck, subtly pulling her closer to his lips. “So you won’t mind if I put your statement to the test?”

He's super rich and privileged

Sleepwalking for so many years

He looks good stock, he seems well bred

Sleepwalking for so many years…

“I don’t have to prove you shit!” She hissed, fists balling beside her in an attempt to keep her anger under control.

A sly smirk plastered on Moxley’s lips upon hearing her small curse. “So there’s still some realness in you even after you sat on the money throne, huh? I knew you wouldn’t let me down”.

“What the hell do you want, Jonathan?”

“You’re not going to do that, are you?” Mox’s lips brushed against hers, his rough voice was low, almost a whisper as his warm peppermint breath caressed her skin. “You’re not going to destroy your life like that, I won’t let you do it”.

“Of course, because only you are allowed to destroy my heart and make my life miserable, no?”

“He’s the one who’ll make you miserable, kitten. I’ve seen his pictures, he doesn’t have what it takes to be with you”

“Says the lying asshole who never kept his promises and abandoned me whenever he had the chance”

“I’ve never done any of that and you know it” Moxley’s fingers teased the pulse point of her neck, he drew small circles on the sensitive flesh until they eventually traveled to her nape. “I never lied to you”.

“You said you loved me”

“I did” Mox tilted her neck back until her eyes could stare up at him.

You're the one that I need…

He laid a tempting peck on her lips before whispering “And I still do”. The intense baby blue eyes stared into her soul, and she could feel herself getting overwhelmed by his presence. Whenever she was with him, Moxley turned her into a shy young girl again, the one who was more than prepared to discover the world with the blonde bad boy.

“I kept all of my promises, even when I didn’t want to. I promised to stay away and I did, I promised to never get in touch with you again, and I kept my word. You didn’t want me anywhere near you again, so I did what you asked me to, even though my instincts told me not to”

“I thought you were going to come after me, Jonathan. But you left!”

“You told me to-“

“I was 21 for fuck’s sake! Do you think I meant any of the shit I said to you? I was just a dumb kid trying to get her boyfriend’s attention! I wanted you to come after me at least once, Jon. For the first time in our relationship, I wanted to feel like you cared enough to ask me to stay, I wanted you to fight for us-” She felt her words being swallowed by Mox’s lips.

His hands cupped her cheeks, fingers traced the hairline in her nape before pulling the metal side comb away from her hair. Moxley’s hands buried into the cascade of locks, reveling in the feeling of having her soft mane in his palms once again.

I'm a degenerate but no fool who's going to bore you to death…

“You always talked too much” He whispered in a teasing tone against her wet lips once they broke the kiss.

“You can’t do this, Jon” Her tongue darted out to taste the remaining flavor of his gum on her lips, “You can’t just show up whenever you feel like it and expect me to drop everything-“

“Come with me, kitty cat” His arms closed around her waist, pulling her closer to his body enough for her to feel his erection pressing against her stomach. “I want you to come with me, you know you want to come with me. You don’t belong here”.

“Jon, please. I can’t do this”

Mox intertwined their fingers and began to pull her towards the fire exit, “Come with me, kitten. I promise you won’t regret it”, was the last thing he whispered before the darkness of the stairs engulfed his figure.

[radioisntdead]

Good evening folks I'm sleep deprived again and you know what that means! Deranged headcanons this time with almost everyone and not just Alastor, reader pops in and out, I lost my hazbin header and I don't feel like going to redownload it rn so I'll edit this tomorrow to add it in, probably, someone remind me.

I can't remember Sir Pentious being around stairs, did we see him go upstairs in the show?? Do the egg Bois carry him? Did he evolve and master the art of snake crawling up the stairs??

You think when he first died he kept faceplanting himself, like stairs were this dork's [affectionate] number one enemy, one wrong move and WAM, BAM, BOOOM Sir Pentious is injured, ouchy

Hear me out on the reader just picking him up bridal style to go upstairs, like the reader doesn't look that strong and then sir Pentious is struggling with stairs so they just 'YOINK'

Okay so Charlie scrapbooks right? Pretty sure that's canon or it's just become fanon enough that I can't remember the difference,

You and Charlie scrapbooking together, like just bonding, pop on some type of movie on the tv, make popcorn and other snacks and get a ton of crafting stuff for scrapbooking.

Vaggie gives off the vibe that she sleepwalks or talks in her sleep like from silly stuff like "gimme back my fruit gummies" to "He's watching you."

Also she has that type of sleepwalking that's just doing routines so you'll wake up to go downstairs and grab water or something and you just see Vaggie in her pajamas swinging her spear around,

You should promptly walk back up those stairs because you do NOT DUCK AROUND WITH ANGELIC WEAPONS.

No idea if Vaggie is still a moth with the whole fallen angel exorcist thing [I'm just imagining exorcists aren't all completely human looking just in grayscale, like imagine a exorcist that's like husk,] but like dangle a lamp Infront of her and it wows her for a few minutes giving you time to escape.

Speaking of husk, does he count as a furry? He does right? I'm imagining if you really really don't like furries and you go below you become a furry, but we saw some folks in heaven, do they get to choose to be furries? [Should clarify I have nothing against furries, Some of the nicest people I've met have been furries, you do you, I'm just wondering]

Do you think he goes to a doctor or a vet? [I don't think he goes to either, he has to be dragged there dude gives off the 'its fine' 'YOU HAVE A GIANT CYST IN YOUR ARM' 'its fine' vibes]

Speaking of animals Angel dust probably had a tough time learning to walk with his spider legs when he first died because they have that bendy bit right? I would fall on my face.

I imagine there's a bunch of learning when you just die and end up in eternal damnation like you get some type of features right?

You think Vox tapes stuff to his face? Like I saw this one fanart with him holding a rose in his teeth but like, he's a flat face TV screen I don't think he can hold that properly without the rose bending.

I'm bringing the hat gremlin reader into this and from my doodles Vox's hat has little spikey legs

They crack his screen, they're like a cat, meow meow

Same vibes you can't convince me otherwise.

Also Vox looks very biteable, munch munch

Alastor probably did this if Vox had a flat screen at a point in their past friendship.

I think I said it before but I have a whole plan to take out the Vee's if I ever got isekaied into hazbin, for all purposes if I got isekaied into hazbin I WOULD LIKE TO BE IN HEAVEN. I WOULD NOT WANT TO ENCOUNTER ALASTOR HE WOULD KILL ME [or I'd annoy him to death] I WOULD NOT BE SAFE

Anyways Angelic steel baseball bat, Vox has a screen, WAM BAM DEAD TV HEAD MAN

Valentino lure him in with a lamp, then angelic weapon and bug spray, 2 for 2

Or am angelic steel one of THESE

And all I'm gonna say for Velvette is horrible fashion, she'll explode from anger.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for killing my crush's dad?

I know it sounds really bad but for some context.

I (19 F) and my crush A (18 F) have been attending to the same occultism school, I met A when I heard her thoughts in a very persistent manner and became obssesively in love with her, we were both from completelly different countries and studying there, plus we both are neurodivergent and have many things in common. I haven't been able to make any friends since I moved here, and I have not had human contact for year before meeting A since I was in a cult, but I was scared of A judging me or what they would do to her if they find out we were hanging out.

So I would just follow A around listening to her thoughts and leaving reminder notes in her dorm, sometimes even leaving breakfast in her night stand and watch A sleepwalking at night to make sure she didn't hurt herself. It kept me sane for some reason and helped her thrive.

Ok so now to the story.

A received a letter from her father that A's mom died, and A couldn't contact her dad through the phone so she went to grab a ticket to travel to her hometown. And I followed A as always.

Long story short we ended in a killing festival, but I still went to confront A's father while avoiding everyone. A does want him dead since he was abusive and wanted A to become a priest like him, but A's mom (bless her soul) was opposed to this.

I confronted A's dad for all the things he has done to A and her hometown, but he kept misgendering A and calling her a "disgrace" and a "coward" for not taking the same path I was forced to take. I understandably got angry and insulted him back, and then he grabbed me and started calling me names and hitting me, so I stabbed him until he let go off me. But he wasn't moving much, I panicked and left the scene and had a panic attack in the basement.

A found me but I just started word vomiting about how I didn't mean to kill him and that I was sorry, how I did it for her. But A said she didn't even know me, A did manage to call me down and convince me to move to a safer place than the church basement, but she was still pretty angry about it.

Of course I did end up confessing everything and my love for her, and responding a few questions. But I really understand that A is upset not only from the incident but also losing her mother and her hometown becoming more of a shithole that it already was.

I want to make it up for her or at least her not having such a negative impression of me, A did say she was very upset with him but also that she needed to process it all, but I also feel like I have to leave A alone for good, I have talked to other people about it so I'm conflicted.

AITA?

[hauntedfalcon]

(MORE candela dark materials stuff)

draven kingsley's daemon is (was) an argentine black and white tegu. the aesthetics of it are too perfect otherwise. also: What Happens To Daemons Exposed To Bleed... the shapeshifting creatures impersonate people, and surely to do that successfully in this setting they would need to mimic daemons - or maybe the lack of one would be a sign that someone's been replaced?

also. auntie bee and her daemon The Most Stubborn And Judgemental Goat To Ever Exist. this goat has caught sean and marion getting into trouble as children So Many Times and has Never Even Once cut them any slack about it. they can't reminisce about their childhoods for two minutes without The Goat going "hey remember when you got yourself concussed because you did some stupid shit and then Did Not Learn Your Lesson?" it 100% also pretends to just be regular goat sometimes, in much the same way that bee plays up her "just a frail old lady nothing to see here" thing when she's Up To Mischief. everyone is a little bit terrified of this very powerful goat.

also... the implication that, potentially, jinnah's dad was the one to sever jean and marion's daemons? because there was something Wrong with their daemons maybe?? (that maybe their daemons "died" but they themselves didn't, and they were stuck bound to this corpse that wouldn't fade away until it had to be severed from them like a rotten limb??) or that it happened somehow without anyone actively doing it - marion waking up from sleepwalking at the age of seven, suddenly unable to find his daemon anywhere?? (he wanted to be normal so bad, would that manifest as attempts to hide that he doesn't have a daemon? feeding stray animals, trying to coax them close to him so that if someone were to glance over they'd assume he still had his soul? jean looking at those display cases of pinned beetles and arachnids and Feeling about it??)

for some reason I'm picturing nathaniel's dad as having a straight-up horse daemon and I can't put it out of my mind. A Full Very Big Horse that you cannot move more than like ten feet away from at any given time. you go into a room and see a well-dressed man and A Horse. and the horse is a right bastard, too. terrible company.

for sean's mum, I'm imagining a fox, and I don't know why. something something foxes are clever city-dwelling animals that hide in burrows and are hunted down by dogs??

anyway; I know Almost Nothing about his dark materials, certainly not enough to actually write anything myself, but oh boy the brainwheels are a-turnin' about how fucked up this au could potentially get

oooohoohoo my god hell yes. what if the bleed creatures manifest fake daemons as just like. a growth or a tendril forming that shape beside them. horrifying. especially horrifying in a world where everyone is used to daemons because they would gradually get the creeping sensation that no matter how realistic they seem, there’s no soul in there

have you listened to the Worlds Beyond Number children’s campaign? because Bee’s goat is giving big Taro vibes and I’m here for it

absolutely HATE the idea of seven year old kids carrying around their dying or dead daemons, you genius, that’s so devastating. Marion with a canary in his hands that keeps fluttering and turning into a yellow butterfly and back but can’t. work up the strength to fly. I believe in you, make this AU even more fucked up than that, I dare you

[gas-stxtion-a]

@chaieyestea said: Not sure if you've already talked about something like this, but what are your muses' (you pick who) sleeping traits? Ex, do they have the body temp of a radiator? Do they toss and turn in their sleep? Would they press their ice-cold feet to the back of someone's legs to wake them up?

//oooh yes yes!!! first of all. hello chai. second of all. i have talked about some of this in the past, but i'll go ahead and take the opportunity to ramble a little!!! :3

jack: so jack doesn't usually sleep in an actual bed and tends to kinda just... fall asleep wherever he is, occasionally while standing and working. he sleepwalks like a motherfucker.

but, when he does sleep in a bed, he tends to curl up a little bit. imagine a little cat except this cat is trying *not* to take up space. that's him. growing up with like at least eight foster siblings means jack is used to taking up as little space as possible when he sleeps, because that's what he did as a child. he also tends to stay very still when he sleeps, and he's a very light sleeper. it doesn't take much to wake him up in general.

in terms of body temperature, jack naturally runs a bit colder--i actually headcanon he has a lower body temperature than average, which actually makes it a bit dicey when he has fevers because "fever" for him is not the same as many other people.

jerry: jerry sprawls out whenever he sleeps and is a *heavy* fucking sleeper. he sleeps like a rock. i also don't think he tosses and turns that much--essentially the moment he's unconscious, he's dead weight, and that's your problem now.

the only time he doesn't sprawl out is when he's sharing a bed with someone, in which case he cuddles them. he wraps himself around them like a big gangly octopus and refuses to let go. if you need to piss in the morning, god fucking help you.

jerry also snores a lot! and due to the gap in his front teeth, his snores sound a little like. whistle-y. that's not a word but that's what i'm imagining.

jerry runs a bit hot, but when his feet get cold, he *does* put them on people he shares a bed with without warning to wake them up.

rosa: rosa tends to toss and turn a little when she sleeps unless she's sharing the bed with someone. i don't think rosa can sleep comfortably and soundly alone, which is part of why she got a cat! ricky sleeps in her bed and curled up next to her, and that helps her sleep better.

rosa has a bit of a hotter body temperature than normal and she's a goddamn furnace under the covers. at least, to other people. rosa feels cold pretty easily and loves to bundle up when she sleeps--get this girl a pile of blankets STAT.

when sharing a bed with someone, rosa loves to cuddle, and she's perfectly happy as both big and little spoon. just snuggle her, that's what she wants.

tony: tony struggles to sleep quite a bit. he has chronic pain as a result of his back injury that makes it hard to find a comfortable position to sleep in--usually on his side, and even then, usually on his left side (to avoid putting too much pressure on his head injury. he sleeps very stiffly, one hand under his pillow and kinda curled around himself.

(tony keeps a gun under his pillow, just in case. he never feels safe letting his guard down and he needs to be ready to pull it out at a moment's notice.)

when he shares a bed with someone, tony curls around them, usually arranging them so that he's between them and the door (if they're close enough, but if he's sharing a bed with them then i figure they are). he's a bit of a light sleeper, though, so it's not hard to wake him up if you need to move. he also runs very warm, though, and cuddling with him gets hot and sweaty real fast.

spencer: spencer can sleep standing straight up with his eyes open. and he often does that, though he doesn't sleep walk to as significant a degree as jack does. but yeah, spencer doesn't usually sleep in a bed either, and he tends to sleep very stiffly whenever he does. he doesn't toss and turn, and he's a super light sleeper as well. similarly to tony, spencer keeps a weapon on him at all times, and he makes sure to have easy access to it even when resting.

spencer runs very cold. he doesn't heat up easily, and though he'd never admit it, he does like to have a lot of blankets when he sleeps. only when he sleeps alone, of course--he'd never let anyone know he's *vulnerable* and wants *comfort* like a soft blanket. why would he do that? freak.

on the incredibly rare occasions that spencer trusts someone enough to share a bed with them, spencer kinda drapes himself over them. not really curling around them in a protective way, very much putting an arm over them in a possessive way. you can't leave, because spencer doesn't want you to.

amelia: amelia i imagine also tends to sleep pretty stiffly, but she's a muuuuch heavier sleeper than spencer or tony. when she conks out, she's out for the next eight hours minimum. however, when she cuddles with someone, she loosens up and likes to just hold them, often resting her head on their chest.

as someone who tends to be pretty dominant in a lot of situations (by necessity, not by choice), it's hard for amelia to let her walls down most of the time, even just to cuddle up to someone, but when she does she *melts.* absolutely amelia cuddles up to someone and loves to be their little spoon.

i also imagine amelia runs pretty hot sometimes, but not overly so. she's warm, really. a very comfortable body temperature to snuggle with.

sabine: as a bonus, sabine sprawls out when sleeping alone, but when sleeping with someone, she curls up around them, holding them close to her body and burying her face in the back of their neck. sabine isn't super comfortable as a little spoon must of the time, but god does she love being the big spoon.

(though, yes, on the occasions she's comfortable letting someone spoon up behind her, she loves it. just hold her gently and kiss the back of her neck pls <3)

sabine is a very heavy sleeper, though she struggles to fall asleep at time. girl often has to take a melatonin before bed, and that shit knocks her out cold for ten hours at a time.

[mickgaydolenz]

hey I just remembered a nightmare experience I had a few months ago

I woke up at three AM because of thirst. and in my kitchen, I noticed a bunch of ugly things crawling around. oh. it was A GIANT HATCHED NEST OF DADDY LONG LEGS. EVERYWHERE. I'm panicking I have arachnophobia it's the middle of the night I'm all alone in this situation. so I reach for the sandals because the fan was on they were crawling on the floor, floating through the air, doing the electric boogaloo. and I start just swatting and crushing and ridding them off the earth. then, and then, when the job is done. someone is awake behind me thinking I am sleepwalking. I try to tell them no, there are spiders in the air everywhere. but they take the sandals and lead me to bed. in the morning, I show them the mutilated corpses. I did not sleepwalk. then, a few days later, I woke up from thirst again. It's three AM. I'm nervous, I go to get water. there is a black widow corpse on my kitchen floor. I go to bed with a glass of water with me now.

💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 wow 0/10 horrible experience, what huge L hours dude that’s horrendous 🥶. in exchange for your cursed spider experience, i will tell you about one of the times i house sat for an old prof of mine. she had 2 cats that were outdoor cats and liked to come in and out at various points throughout the night. so one evening as i was sleeping i heard them both come inside and start violently playing in the bedroom i was sleeping in. finally i got up to check out what was going on (because they were under the bed being loud) and discovered them batting around a dead mouse 😔

[girltomboy]

Last week I started watching Yellowjackets

Since Succession is ending I will be left with nothing to watch regularly, and my bf is starting exams soon so we will not be able to hang out as much, I figured I'm going to need a replacement for my little solo evenings. I was ambivalent towards the pilot but it was entertaining regardless of my petty gripes with it so I kept watching (imagine my disappointment when I logged in the next day to see people shredding the season 2 finale). And last night I finished the first season and I just want to say so far this show blew my hair back. Like it got me staring at my screen, hand stuck in my hair, mouth hanging wide open. The plot got me thinking it was going to be some kind of 90s Survivor Euphoria with cannibalism, but it's really more like teenage Hannibal if it was Stranger Things for the kids, and Desperate Housewives in Orphan Black for the adults.

Initially I criticized it (in my head and my notes app) for not-great acting at times - I saw the post that said Juliette Lewis plays Natalie like she's constantly drunk and I can totally see it and it's kinda bugging me now - AND for playing too much music. Like, I appreciate needle drops when they have a purpose, but here I think the frequency is just excessive. I thought Nicholas Britell has turned me into a spoiled TV watcher with the Succession soundtrack, but honestly there are times in Yellowjackets when I'd just prefer silence. Anyway, those things are too minor to matter in my watching experience at this point because the show is too good so I got over them quickly.

I have a lot of thoughts about it; first of all, is it ever revealed that Callie is really Jeff's daughter? Or that she's the daughter Shauna carried and birthed in the wilderness? So far I'm just not entirely convinced. It is not lost on me that she seems to have a wonky relationship with meat, so I wonder if there's more to that or not.

Second, we still don't know if Adam was for real with Shauna or if he had any hidden intentions. Like, okay, he wasn't involved with the blackmailing, and also he's dead now and apparently his friends and family are looking for him, but that still doesn't mean he was fully honest with Shauna about who he is/what he wants, especially because she caught him lying a few times already, and his whole existence around her was excessively coincidental. By the way, the whole Jeff thing with the blackmail and stealing Shauna's stuff and everything was SO FORCED and weird like I would have preferred the cheating arc instead of this goofy stretch.

Moreover, young Taissa is shown to be skeptical of Lottie's visions and Van's faith, but adult Taissa is implied to have used the cult symbol/sacrifice for professional gain - at least that's what I gathered from it. So I assume this means her skepticism will be dropped in s2 or her sleepwalking takes a freaky turn. I already believe Lottie actually saw her eating dirt in the forest at night and it wasn't a dream or a vision, because when Taissa was bathing with Van in the lake, Van points out how dirty her nails are, and Taissa doesn't know why.

So far Van and Misty seem to have joined Lottie's little church, and at the end of the last episode, Nat's former sponsor Suzie implies Lottie is connected to the blackmail and the kidnapping, and ofc the cult. But if Van, Misty, and Lottie were first in the cult, why is adult Misty apparently clueless about it? I feel like she of all people should have a slight idea, or should be able to draw a connection, even as a theory.

I'm concerned by how little everyone seems to care that Javi straight up disappeared while he was tripping on shrooms. I did think Adam was Javi for a split second (when Shauna goes to his house the second time, the shot of his face fades into a shot of Javi at doomcoming) but apparently that is not the case, and it was a complete stretch (mainly because Javi would not be much younger than Shauna, and also they would probably recognize each other as adults) but just a lightning bolt thought I had. I think perhaps he went to his father's burial place, or maybe the lake, but after the snowfall I have very little hope of him still being alive.

Speaking of snow, I think Jackie died way too soon and too suddenly. I thought the whole Shauna's pregnancy with Jeff's baby - secret thing would drag on for at least a little bit longer. Like, it was just ridiculous, but also I assume the girls who were at the reunion (and Travis) were the only ones that made it back home? Or maybe the rest just didn't come? I know there's an adult Van from what spoilers I accidentally read from s2, but I'm curious to find out why they don't *all* stay in touch.

Anyway, I am enjoying the hell out of it, Flight of the Bumblebee was one of the best TV episodes I've seen in a while, and I'm going to start s2 today, but I've seen people complain about it so I'm not sure if it's the drama in the show or straight up the quality of the season that they were complaining about. So I'm going in with lower expectations.

[elizabeth-mitchells]

Hello. I hope your having a good day. I have never watched Yellowjacket but I do think it looks interesting and I follow you and a few other people who love this show so my ask is can you tell me what it’s about. Also feel free to share some opinions about characters and storylines as I don’t mind spoilers and they actually help me watch new shows so I’m not as anxious about it. Also do you have a favorite head canon that isn’t talked about??

Hi!! omg this is so exciting. okay. here we go!!

First of all, I love the show very much, I recommend it 100%, if you're interested in some of the most fascinating female characters on tv right now and you can handle a little bit of horror, you should totally watch it!!!

This includes spoilers from the very beginning and all the way to halfway to episode 06 of season 2...

Basically, Yellowjackets is about a group of teenage girls, a high school soccer team, that crashes in the wilderness (some forest/mountains situation in Canada) and they spend a shocking 19 months surviving out there. At the same time, it tells the stories of the survivors, 25 years later, and the crazy, crazy amount of trauma that all of them are dealing with because we are told that did some horrible, terrible, awful bad things in the wilderness in order to survive. aka it is heavily implied that they resorted to cannibalism. but not just that! because that is pretty much established since the first episode! actually, things get even weirder, probably supernatural, and all signs point to a teenage girl cult!

The drama between all these characters is *chefs kiss*. Their lives are so messed up, their choices are so questionable, they are so much much. There is some horror, I'm not sure how to measure that... like, enough to make it a difficult watch if you're too squamish, but I'd say not unwatchable. (for example: an amputated leg, face torn by wolves, chopping a dead body, and lots of unsettling imagery! the cannibalism itself wasn't Very explicit but it Has happened)

Now about the characters! (i'll try to be brief because I could talk about them for days) We have...

Shauna Shipman! My poor little meow meow. As a teenager she lived under the shadow of her best friend Jackie (popular girl, team captain, with the "perfect boyfriend) but did she? because actually Shauna was sleeping with Jackie's boyfriend, had a lot to do in Jackie's extremely tragic death, and now she carries the heavy burden of her guilt and more trauma than anyone would know what to do with!

Taissa Turner, miss senator!! Distinguished lesbian and chaotic lesbian at the same time. She's a leader, she's pragmatic, she's stubborn, she occasionally sleepwalks when she's stressed!! which prompts her to eat dirt, scare the people around her, and possibly built creepy altars that will ruin her marriage <3

Natalie Scatorccio!! my girl was traumatized even before the plane crashed. she was very important in the wilderness for being the best one with a gun. and yet she suffered from "wristers pushed her into a terrible relationship with the one male character of the show". after they were rescued, Natalie struggled with addiction for years until we meet her at a very rough moment in her life, after said male character dies and she's more and more haunted by their past

Misty Quigley!! My absolute beloved!! She's never done anything wrong ever, except for the atrocities committed <3 She's basically insane, but she's an absolute delight to watch on screen. Your next problematic fav! She's the nerdy outcast that nobody liked until they needed her medical knowledge in the wilderness, and nobody liked after she drugged them all, and as an adult she's just Christina Ricci trying her best!

In season two we get to see much more of Van and Lottie!! Van was dating Tai when they were teens but now she's just a very iconic lesbian, more trouble than she's let us know so far, and she'll be your next unproblematic fav! Meanwhile Lottie is leaning more toward the insane, cult leader, and absolutely gorgeous. she starts off as the rich girl that under different circumstances would've died right away but here's the twist... prophetic visions ✨ my girl will raise as a cult leader in the past and the present and i just want the best for her.

there are more characters! including Travis, the guy i hate. and his younger brother Javi, who's sometimes there, and sometimes isn't! there's Coach Scott! he's just gay and struggling. there's Mari being mean, Akilah also trying her best, some random girls sometimes? and for my favorite headcanon that isn't talked about (enough)... Laura Lee!! i don't even know why I got so emotionally attached to the character of the angelic devout catholic girl that died a tragic dead on season one but i just love her so much!! and especially her relationship with Lottie! trust me on this, they were so gay together. they turned a baptism into a lesbian ceremony! Laura Lee's ghost saved Lottie's life!! the potential these two had!!!

✨ the end ✨

i hope this was somehow coherent and that i possibly convinced you to watch the show? there's a lot that i missed talking about here, i'm so sorry about that but i'm so ready to asnwer if you have any more questions!!

[zanazirafanfic]

Yeah, people with OCD worrying about becoming pedophiles isn't because they actually are. The name "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" is exactly what it says on the tin - it makes you worry about completely irrational things to the point that it consumes every other thought with that one. freaking. thing.

Like, "I know I probably won't get axe-murdered tonight, but what if I do though? I absolutely must check every door and window lock in the house to make sure a murderer can't get in or I'll die." "The air around me probably isn't poisonous, but that smell is weird and what if it's something toxic and now I'm going to die?" "I've literally never lit a candle in this house before, but I need to check for any open flames 5 times before I can go to bed or I'll burn the house down." These examples aren't mocking, either - all of them were legitimate ones I dealt with before.

A lot revolve around death or fear of it in some way, or around being a bad/evil/disappointing person. Literally my most memorable irrational fear (the one that got me my OCD diagnosis at age 11) was that I was going to somehow sleepwalk into the utility room, drink bleach, and die. Age 11, and I was terrified of accidental suicide, despite not being suicidal whatsoever and having no experience or family history that should have even let me comprehend what that was.

OCD isn't "OMG I'm so quirky I like a clean house teehee!" It's cyclical thinking, worrying intensely about completely illogical things that usually spring from one tiny passing thought or observation that may be only barely related, and can cause all kinds of difficulties in just living day-to-day.

After being on medication, going to therapy, and nearly 30 years of life with this disorder (I had symptoms ever since birth, but only learned what they meant 20 years ago), I've pretty well learned to keep it in check and recognize which thoughts are genuinely mine and which ones are OCD-motivated. (Usually the self-deprecating, panicky, oh-my-god-I'm-a-terrible-person-for-no-reason ones are a dead giveaway). Nowadays it doesn't cause me any noticeable problem about 95% of the time. But not everyone gets to that point of comfort with it, and it can be crippling even in adulthood.