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azrielslightintheshadows · 10 months

Text

Princess

Azriel x f!Reader.

One of the series I’m currently working on. Enjoy!

Summary; Reader is Mor’s new friend that she found in the winter court while she was away for business. Y/n has been raised as a princess since her parents wanted to wed her to a noble fae in order to climb the social ranks. When her parents are brutally murdered y/n is left alone without a clue about the harsh reality or the brutality of the world. Mor finds her and takes her back to Velaris afraid of what might happen to her if she was left to live on her own. Will y/n survive the hate she will receive from certain members of the inner circle -including her mate- regarding the way she grew up?

Warnings; angst, mentions of abuse, trauma and death, swearing

Masterlist.

Princess Masterlist.

Chapter 8

How did she know? Does everyone know about the bond? Am I trapped here?

Some people say that the best kind of love is the one that awakens the soul, that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. They are right, that’s the reason why you and Azriel would never work, you didn’t want to reach for more, he planted a fire in your heart, but it wasn’t one that kept you warm, no… it burned your heart to ashes and like a phoenix it rises from them to give him the pleasure of burning it again and again. And peace to your mind? That’s a nice joke.

You kept crying until your body collapsed, pulling you harder against the floor, and your lungs clenched choking you with all your sorrows.

“This monster will always have a claim on you.”

Your blood boiled at the thought, and your body twitched with the need to get as far away as possible, to never look back and if necessary… to end your life so he will never be able to touch you.

You felt soft hands wrapping around you in a warm embrace.

“My sweet girl what did I do to you by bringing you here?” Mor spoke and her eyes watered.

“Its okay” you croaked. “You didn’t know that this would happen.” “Such a kind soul” she whispered and caressed your hair.

“Mor… please help me get out of here… please”.

“Where do you want to go?” she asked.

“Rita’s”

She nodded and got up. You grabbed a bag and filled it with a few clothes making her furrow her eyebrows.

“I’m not leaving Velaris, I will stay with a friend for a while.” You reassured her and she nodded.

You both tiptoed out of the house, and she winnowed you to Rita’s. “Do you want me to come with you?” she asked, and you shook your head.

“I’m fine, thank you for your help. I would really appreciate if you kept this a secret for now.”

“Okay but you will meet me here in three days. I want to make sure that you’re okay.” She spoke.

Make sure that I’m okay or that I didn’t leave? Am I your prisoner? You wanted to scream but the fear of returning to the house of wind choked you and the unspoken words pierced your mind like thousand blades making you flinch.

With a nod you entered the club and almost crawled to the bar, staring at Aeden’s eyes desperately. Your friend immediately read you and jumped over the counter, hugging you tightly and kissing your temple.

“What happened dollface?” he asked.

“I…he..all of them…” you sobbed each word and he shushed you.

“It’s okay… I’ve got you. You’re safe.”

Clover glanced at you worriedly and cocked his head in question making Aeden shake his head. They had a conversation with their eyes and after a nod from Clover your friend grabbed your bags.

“Let’s get you out of here.” He said softly and guided you outside.

You walked down the road and turned right.

“Here” he said and climbed a few steps. The building looked warm and welcoming, just like Aeden and you couldn’t help but smile.

You entered his apartment, and it was just like how you imagined it, cozy and warm, a proof of his friendly character. He immediately placed your bags in a small closet and hurried to the room to change the sheets.

“I don’t want to be a burden…I can go if you want it’s okay” you sniffled.

“Nonsense, you’ll stay here for as long as you need, heck even forever.” He chuckled “But if you decide to stay forever you will pay half the rent.” A breathy laugh left your lips. “Thank you.”

“Well it’s been a while since I had a beautiful female in here so thank you for making me look cool to my neighbors” he winked and finished making the bed.

“I will make something to eat” he stated and walked back into the small kitchen.

You followed him and grabbed his hand “Let me…as a thank you”.

He smiled kindly and nodded, taking a few steps back and sitting on the kitchen table.

“You know we’re going to eat on the same surface that your butt is currently touching” you wrinkled your nose.

“Thank the Mother I washed it today” he feigned a relieved expression and you giggled.

“You’re disgusting”

“I’m letting you stay here, and you treat me like that?” he gasped “You’re such an ungrateful little lady”.

You shook your head with a smile and started exploring the kitchen gathering everything you needed.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Mor returned to the house of wind and rolled her eyes when she noticed everyone there sitting around the dinner table. She took a seat next to the warlord making Azriel quirk a brow.

“You usually sit here” the shadowsinger spoke.

“And today I’m sitting here.” She scoffed.

“We should wait for y/n before we start eating” Feyre said, and everyone hummed.

Mor lowered her gaze at her plate not wanting them to suspect something.

“I’ll go get her” Rhys said and walked to the hall.

“I don’t think she wants to sit with us.” Cassian spoke.

Rhys froze beneath the arch of the hall. “Why?”

Elain lowered her gaze and Cassian stared at the shadowsinger.

“Az?” Rhys questioned.

“We had a fight, I said some horrible things.” Azriel said with a cold expression.

Nesta scoffed making everyone turn to her. “Oh your quiet and kind spymaster has fucked up everything”

“What do you mean?” Rhys pushed, glaring at his brother.

“He has been spending his nights in Gwyn’s bedroom, lying in bed with her and reading books, my poor friend is completely in love with him, and he is taking advantage of that to feel less lonely. He didn’t even tell her that he has a mate, Emerie told us today. Do you know how bad I feel for them? I told poor y/n the other day that I could see something between the two of them and that he spends his nights with Gwyn as a heads up. I feel so stupid for telling a female something like that about her mate.” Nesta was glaring at Azriel.

“She wants to break the bond” Elain joined the conversation. “And I told Azriel because of a vision I had.” She glanced at Cassian for help.

“He burst into her room…” Cassian’s face flushed with embarrassment for their actions. “Many words were said. He told her that the monster -he will always have a claim on her.”

Azriel stared at the wall across him with a cold expression.

“Are you kidding me?” Rhysand was seething, his night-kissed power trembled the house. “We brought a scared and lost female here to help her find herself and you all treated her like shit?”

Feyre gaped at them, and disappointment flashed in her eyes. “She is such a kind soul…”

“I knew you two had problems, but I never expected this from you.” Rhysand told Azriel.

“She annoys me Rhys. I couldn’t believe that I have such a weak mate. You know how many enemies I have…. If I pursued her, I would put her in danger. Everyone who wants to get to me will target her. So, I decided to let her go but I can’t reject her… you know how faes have gone mad after rejecting the bond.”

“She wants to break it, if she can do that there won’t be any remains to make you go mad” Mor finally spoke.

Azriel shook his head and glanced at Elain “She will die”.

Everyone frowned.

“I saw her dying while breaking the bond… Azriel is strong enough to survive but she isn’t.” Elain informed them “That’s why I told him. I didn’t want to tell her because I’m afraid I will destroy her future, I don’t know how my powers work yet and I’m not willing to test them on her life.”

The High Lord took a deep breath. “Okay we won’t tell her but you will leave her alone. You will either become her friends or just leave her alone. If you can’t do that, me and Feyre will take her to the River House.”

“She enjoys training, I think its best if she stays here. Emerie and Gwyn want to be her friends and I think I want that too.” Nesta shrugged.

“There won’t be a problem with Gwyn?” Feyre quirked a brow.

Nesta snorted “It’s Azriel’s fault, and Gwyn knows it. She actually feels bad for Y/n and herself”.

Azriel nodded “I won’t bother them again”.

“Good I’m going to fetch her and all of you will apologize” Rhysand used his High Lord voice, and everyone nodded.

They remained silent and all snapped their heads to Rhysand when he came back, his face pale.

“What?” Azriel asked and raised from his seat.

“She’s gone” the High Lord mumbled.

“What do you mean gone?” the shadowsinger asked again and sprinted off. He entered your room, his shadows darting away covering every corner of the house.

She’s gone. Some of her clothes are missing too. His shadows whispered and then he felt them piercing his mind.

Idiot. We’re losing her.

Azriel walked into the dining room again, his whole body shaking.

“I’m going to find her” and with that he walked out and jumped from the balcony, his wings stretching wide and his shadows scattering around the city, making it look darker like it was mourning. Mourning a love that never happened.

If I forgot to tag someone please let me know. What do you think?

@glitterypirateduck, @zara-aliza08, @mika-no-sekai-blog , @purpleshoelaces , @act1839 , @fasoaurore , @pinksmellslikelove, @bunnyredgirl, @lectoracronica , @tuggboatfishin, @sunnysideup000 , @blessthepizzaman, @universevsd, @raisinggray, @ssmay123 , @kalulakunundrum, @justasillylittlegoofyguy , @tsunami-of-tears, @just-a-social-casualty-1, @thelov3lybookworm , @saltedcoffeescotch, @justdreamstars , @strangersunghoon , @sosuitcandy , @cat-or-kitten

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dee-writes-smut · 5 months

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SUMMER (Chapter Four)

FEATURING Azriel x Illyrian!reader

SUMMARY healing is a long journey that can't be summed up in just four simple seasons, but it seems with the help of a certain shadowsinger at your side, you've seemed to do it.

CONTENT WARNINGS mentions of nightmares, apologies, scared reader, comforting Azriel, Cassian POV, and mentions of wingspans ;)

AUTHORS NOTE the finale you've all been waiting for is finally here as promised! Thank you all so much for your support during this series, I am excited to be back and writing for you all again! Love you all and I hope you enjoy! <3

Summer arrives like a promise fulfilled, a canvas awash with vibrant hues of green and gold, as if nature herself has donned her finest attire. The air hums with the gentle whisper of transformation, carrying the scent of freshly cut grass and the promise of new beginnings on its warm breeze.

As the sun stretches its golden fingers across the land, casting long shadows that dance in its radiant glow, there's a palpable sense of rejuvenation in the air. It's as if each dawn heralds a new chapter, a chance to shed the burdens of the past and embrace the endless possibilities of the present.

In this season of abundance, life bursts forth with an exuberance that is both intoxicating and invigorating. The world awakens from its slumber, blossoming with a riot of colors as flowers unfurl their petals in joyful defiance of the lingering chill of winter. Leaves rustle in the gentle caress of the wind, their verdant whispers carrying tales of resilience and growth.

Amidst this symphony of nature's symphony, there is a sense of newfound strength coursing through every living thing. Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, the warmth of the sun infuses each day with a sense of possibility, igniting a fire within the soul that refuses to be extinguished.

In the heart of summer, time seems to slow, allowing moments to linger like the last rays of sunlight on a balmy evening. It's a season of exploration and adventure, where every day holds the promise of discovery and every sunset marks the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.

And as the days stretch languidly into twilight, there is a quiet resilience that takes root, a deep-seated belief in the power of new beginnings and the strength that comes from embracing change. For in the heart of summer, beneath the sweltering heat and the endless blue skies, lies the untold promise of tomorrow, waiting to be seized with both hands and forged into something beautiful.

(Mid Summer, Velaris)

The afternoon sun poured into the training ring, casting long shadows of the figures sparring lightly within it. Cassian was across from me, a patient yet mischievous grin on his face, as he handed me a training sword. “Ready to get your ass kicked, or are you going to make me work for it today?”

I smirked, feeling the flutter of my old spirit stirring within. “Dream on, Cassian.”

The clash of our swords sang through the air, a melody of metal that resonated with the pounding of my heart. Each strike, each parry, felt like shedding layers of fear that had cocooned me since losing my wings.

“Focus,” Cassian said, his voice a mix of sternness and encouragement. “Remember, it’s not just about strength. It’s about knowing your opponent.”

I nodded, gripping my own wooden sword a little tighter. As I lunged forward, Cassian parried easily, countering with a swift movement that I barely blocked in time. We moved in a rhythm, the clack of our swords punctuating each maneuver. My muscles remembered the dance, even if they ached from disuse. Cassian’s style was a flurry of motion, designed to overwhelm, but today he tempered his usual ferocity, giving me room to find my footing again. The physical exertion was grounding, pulling me further away from my mental ghosts.

Laughter and shouts from Mor, watching from the sidelines, filled the arena, her cheers a buoyant soundtrack to our dance of blades and as we paused for a break, Mor jogged over with a waterskin and a smirk. She threw an arm around my shoulders, squeezing tightly. “Look at you! You’re almost back to your old self,” she beamed, her pride evident.

The warmth from her compliment soaked through me, loosening some of the tightness still lingering in my chest. “Feels good to move like that again,” I admitted, allowing the truth of my words to wash over me. It did feel good—like claiming back pieces of my soul, piece by piece.

“You two look like you’re having fun,” she smiled, squeezing me close again as she handed me the waterskin. After I took a long drink, she shot me a sly glance. “Speaking of fun, have you noticed how Azriel can't seem to stay away from your side?”

Mor’s eyebrows wiggled as I coughed on the water, wiping my mouth as I tried to compose myself. “He’s just being supportive,” I muttered, feeling my cheeks heat up.

Cassian chuckled, leaning on his sword. “Oh, he’s being supportive, all right. Haven’t seen him this glued to someone since… well, ever.”

I rolled my eyes, but the seed of awareness began to sprout in my mind. Azriel had indeed been a constant presence, his quiet strength a comfort I hadn’t realized I’d leaned on so much.

“Do you think it might be a mating bond?” Mor asked casually, too casually, as she inspected her nails.

The question halted me, the weight of the implication settling in my stomach like a stone. The mating bond was sacred, profound—was I ready for something like that? The very thought made my heart race, not just with fear but with a blossoming hope I hadn’t acknowledged until now.

“Maybe he’s just being a good friend,” I countered, but my voice lacked conviction.

Cassian raised an eyebrow, giving me a knowing look. “When you know, you know,” he said simply. “And it looks like you’re starting to realize something there.”

We resumed training, but his words echoed in my mind with each strike and block. Azriel’s face appeared in my thoughts, his smiles, the gentle touch of his hands, the way his eyes lit up when he looked at me lately. My feelings for him, which I had shelved as mere gratitude or the simple need for companionship during recovery, seemed to be deepening into something richer, more profound.

As we finished and walked back towards the House of Wind, Mor looped her arm through mine. “You don’t have to figure it all out at once,” she whispered. “But don’t close your heart to the possibility of something beautiful. Azriel cares for you deeply, more than just as a friend or protector.”

The sun dipped below the horizon, casting a golden glow that bathed the world in a soft, forgiving light. It felt symbolic, reflective of my own internal dawn. Maybe, just maybe, I was ready to consider that what lay between Azriel and me could be the kind of love that songs and tales were spun from. As fear and doubt receded, leaving room for this new, tender hope, I realized that my journey of healing was also leading me down a path of rediscovering my capacity to love—not just Azriel, but myself and this new life I was slowly, bravely building.

(Mid Summer, The River House)

That evening, the dinner with the Inner Circle was held at the sprawling, candlelit table in the River House. The atmosphere was thick with laughter and the clinking of glasses, a symphony of friendship and familial bonds. The windows were thrown open, allowing the crisp, cool air of Velaris to sweep through the room, mixing with the scent of jasmine and roasted meats.

As I entered the dining room, a subtle change in my demeanor didn’t go unnoticed by the group. Rhysand was the first to catch my eye, giving me a nod of approval and a warm, welcoming smile. Amren, ever observant, watched me with her piercing gaze, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of her lips, acknowledging the shift in my spirits.

Azriel, standing slightly apart, offered me a soft, encouraging smile as I took my place next to him. His quiet strength bolstered my newfound resolve to engage more fully with those around me.

Dinner began with a lively discussion led by Feyre about a recent exhibition at the art gallery in the city. Her eyes sparkled with excitement as she described the vibrant colors and revolutionary techniques of the new artists showcased. I listened, chiming in with my thoughts on the integration of night and day themes, which earned an approving laugh from Rhys.

As the meal continued, Cassian, true to form, began recounting one of his training escapades, embellishing the details to make his tale more dramatic. “And then, just as I was about to execute my perfectly planned maneuver, an Illyrian baby sneezed on me. Totally threw off my game!”

Laughter erupted around the table, and I found myself genuinely chuckling, the sound surprising even to me. “Only you, Cassian, could be outmaneuvered by a baby’s sneeze,” I teased, earning a round of applause and a mock bow from Cassian.

“See, she’s got jokes now! Our girl’s coming back to us,” Mor exclaimed, her face alight with joy. She reached over to squeeze my hand, her gesture warm and reassuring.

As plates were cleared and desserts were served, the conversation shifted to lighter, more personal stories. Feyre shared anecdotes about her latest painting misadventures, while Mor detailed her plans for the upcoming festival in the city. Each story, each shared laugh, felt like a stitch mending the frayed edges of my soul.

As the dinner party began to wind down in the warm, laughter-filled hall, a soft coo from the corner caught my attention. Nyx, cradled gently in Feyre’s arms, was awake and curiously peeking over her shoulder with wide, starry eyes. I felt my heart tug softly. It had been too long since I had held him, too long since I’d allowed myself to be part of these simpler, beautiful family moments.

Feyre caught my gaze and smiled, understanding immediately. “Someone wants to say hello,” she said softly, walking over with Nyx. His small hand reached out, and I couldn’t help but smile as his fingers grasped at the air between us.

“May I?” I asked, my voice a whisper of excitement mixed with a hint of uncertainty.

“Of course,” Feyre replied, carefully transferring Nyx into my arms. The baby settled against me with ease, a soft sigh escaping him as if he found comfort in my embrace. His tiny hand reached up, touching my cheek gently, an innocent gesture that felt like a reassurance of missed affection. It was as if he was saying he remembered me, that he too had felt the absence of our connection.

The moment wasn’t lost on Azriel, who watched from a short distance. His shadows flickered subtly around him, a telltale sign of his emotions stirring beneath that calm exterior. Since the conversation with Cassian and Mor earlier today, every glance, every small interaction with him seemed charged with a new, silent tension. My newly admitted feelings for him amplified each shared look, adding weight to the air between us.

As I rocked Nyx gently, my thoughts drifted to Azriel again. His presence at my side had become a constant, his support unwavering. The depth of my affection for him had crept up silently, weaving itself into the fabric of my daily life until it was indistinguishable from my other truths. I found myself stealing glances at him, each look a quiet confession of the feelings I was only beginning to allow myself to acknowledge.

Azriel eventually made his way over, his gaze softening as he looked at Nyx in my arms. “He’s missed you,” Azriel murmured, his voice barely audible over the low hum of conversation around us.

I met his eyes, feeling a flush of warmth at the intimacy of the moment. “I’ve missed him, too. Missed all of this,” I admitted, my voice thick with emotion. The way Azriel looked at me then, with such warmth and depth, made my heart skip a beat.

“Looks good on you,” he said after a pause, nodding towards Nyx.

The comment, simple and offhand, thrummed with unspoken meanings. It was a nudge against the boundaries we had maintained, a gentle probing into the new spaces of my heart that had begun to open to him.

As I handed Nyx back to Feyre, I caught Azriel’s arm gently. “Stay for a moment?” I asked, my voice hopeful, laden with the weight of all the things I hadn’t yet said.

He nodded, his usual reserve melting away for a moment as he stayed by my side, his presence a silent promise of things perhaps soon to be explored. We both knew something unspoken was shifting between us, and while neither of us was ready to dive into those waters just yet, acknowledging it—even in silence—felt like the first step toward a new horizon.

(Mid Summer, The House of Wind)

The following week, Feyre, Mor, Nesta, and I revived our "book club"—a ruse for nights filled with wine, wild discussions about our latest reads, and shared secrets under the cloak of night. As I sat curled up on a plush couch, a glass of wine in hand, surrounded by these incredible women, a profound sense of belonging enveloped me. Here, in these moments, I was safe to just be; to heal, to laugh, to grow.

The cozy nook tucked away in the House of Wind had become our sanctuary, a place where the Inner Circle’s book club convened to discuss literature, life, and everything in between. Tonight, as the flickering candlelight cast soft shadows across the room, I settled into my usual spot among the plush cushions, surrounded by my closest friends.

Feyre, Nesta, and Mor lounged around me, each with a book in hand, their faces alight with anticipation for our weekly gathering. The atmosphere was charged with excitement, the air buzzing with the promise of lively conversation and shared insights.

“So, what’s everyone reading this week?” Mor asked, her eyes sparkling with mischief as she glanced around the circle.

Feyre held up a worn copy of her latest find, a tale of forbidden love and political intrigue. “I’m revisiting an old favorite,” she said with a smile. “It’s like catching up with an old friend.”

Nesta, with a smirk playing on her lips, produced a rather scandalous-looking novel with a provocative cover. “I’m exploring the more… sensual side of literature,” she declared, her voice dripping with amusement.

As the conversation flowed around me, I couldn’t help but chuckle at Nesta’s choice. Leave it to her to bring a little spice to our book club discussions. I was hesitant to share tonight, scared to share my feelings so blatantly, to say them out loud in a space with women who would not so soon let me forget. Tonight felt different, though, I felt stronger, able to seize this chance to share with my friends the tumultuous emotions swirling inside me.

“I’ve been reading this collection of poetry,” I began, my voice tentative at first. “It’s funny how words can capture the complexity of human emotions so beautifully.”

Mor’s eyes gleamed with interest, her grin widening. “Ah, poetry—the language of the heart,” she said, her tone teasing yet tender. “Any particular poem speaking to you?”

I hesitated, my gaze flickering to the empty spot where Azriel usually sat. His absence was keenly felt, a reminder of the unresolved tension between us. “There’s one poem that resonates with me,” I admitted, my voice growing stronger with each word. “It’s about…” I faltered, the weight of my confession heavy on my tongue.

Feyre leaned forward, her eyes warm with understanding. “About love?” she prompted gently, her hand reaching out to squeeze mine in silent support.

I nodded, the words spilling forth in a rush. “About love, and fear, and the courage to open your heart to someone—even when it scares you.”

Nesta regarded me with a thoughtful expression, her gaze piercing yet compassionate. “Love is a battlefield,” she said, her voice soft yet firm. “But sometimes, the greatest victories come from facing our fears head-on.”

Mor chimed in with her trademark humor, lightening the mood with a well-timed joke. “Who knew our stoic Shadowsinger had a soft spot for you?”

Feyre smiled knowingly, her eyes dancing with mischief. “Maybe it’s time to confront the shadows and see what lies beneath.”

Nesta couldn’t resist adding her own brand of wit to the conversation. “Speaking of shadows,” she said with a sly grin, “has anyone else noticed Azriel’s wingspan lately?”

We all laughed at Nesta’s comment, the tension in the room dissipating as we embraced the camaraderie of our little gathering. Despite the challenges we faced, tonight was a reminder that with the support of friends, even the darkest shadows could be chased away.

As the evening wore on, our conversation drifted from books to more personal topics, each of us sharing snippets of our lives and experiences. It was a rare moment of vulnerability, a chance to peel back the layers and reveal the raw truths hidden beneath.

Nesta, ever the enigma, shared tales of her latest adventures in the human lands, her sharp wit and cunning intellect shining through with every word.

Mor, always the life of the party, regaled us with stories of her escapades in the Court of Nightmares, her laughter contagious as she recounted her misadventures.

And Feyre, with her quiet strength and unwavering compassion, offered words of wisdom and encouragement, her presence a soothing balm to our troubled souls.

As for me, I found solace in their company, the weight of my burdens eased by the warmth of their friendship. In their laughter and shared moments, I found the courage to confront my fears and embrace the possibility of a brighter future.

And as the candles burned low and the night grew late, I knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, I would face them with the unwavering support of my sisters by my side.

The support of the entire Inner Circle was a force as tangible as the magic that coursed through our veins—a constant, steadfast presence that fortified me against the darker moments. Their belief in me, their unyielding backing, gave me strength, and little by little, I began to feel not just the shadow of the person I once was, but someone stronger, resilient, reborn from adversity.

In these gatherings, these moments of shared vulnerability and joy, I was not just healing. I was transforming—emerging not how I was before the kidnapping, but perhaps even brighter, tempered by trials and warmed by the unwavering light of the family I chose and who had chosen me in return.

(Late Summer, The House of Wind)

The night pressed heavily around the room, its silence a thick, oppressive blanket punctuated only by the soft, rhythmic breathing of Azriel beside me. In the comfort of his proximity, sleep had finally granted me a temporary reprieve from the relentless torment of my nightmares. Yet, the peace was fragile, vulnerable to the slightest disturbance—a reality proven as a sharp, inexplicable chill sliced through the room's stagnant warmth.

The temperature plummeted, wrapping its icy fingers around my spine, jolting me awake. My eyes flicked open, instantly scanning the familiar contours of the room bathed in the ethereal glow of moonlight. Shadows clung to the walls like dark, silent sentinels until one stirred coalescing into a form far too human, far too familiar.

Lyris emerged from the darkness as though materializing from my deepest fears, his presence a tangible echo of past horrors. His eyes, sharp and merciless, locked onto mine with the precision of a hunter sighting its prey. The sheer malevolence in his gaze sent a visceral shudder through me, yet it was no longer solely fear that stirred within my veins. Anger, raw and blazing, kindled within, fueling a burgeoning defiance I hadn't known I possessed.

"Thinking you could escape me?" Lyris's voice was a venomous hiss, his form inching closer with predatory grace. His smirk was twisted, a grotesque mask of sadistic anticipation.

But then, with the seamless reflexes honed by centuries of battle, Azriel was between us. His body moved with lethal precision, his hand snapping out to seize Lyris by the wrist, halting his advance with unyielding strength. "She's under my protection," Azriel snarled, his voice a dangerous, low rumble. His other hand flicked to his side, the sound of steel sliding from leather slicing through the tension as he brandished a dagger, its blade catching the moon's silver light.

Lyris recoiled slightly, his eyes darting to the blade then back to Azriel’s unwavering stare. "You think you can keep her from her fate?" he spat, struggling against Azriel's iron grip.

“Her fate is her own, and you have no part in it,” Azriel retorted, his wings unfurling menacingly. The air around us thickened with dark, swirling shadows, responding to the raw power emanating from him. In that moment, he was not just my protector but an avenging angel cloaked in night's embrace.

The room filled with a heavy, expectant silence, thick with the weight of unspoken threats. Breaking the tension, I found my voice, though it trembled with the force of my emotions. "Where are my wings, Lyris?" The question tore from me, a desperate plea tangled with a demand.

"Your wings?" he mused mockingly, his eyes glinting with cruelty. "Such a precious prize… Let's just say they're kept in a place where they await their true destiny—far from your reach.”

"Give them back," Azriel demanded, his tone lethal, a stark contrast to the deceptive calm of his posture.

Lyris's laugh was cold and chilling, like the howl of the wind outside. "You overestimate your power here, shadow singer. I could take her now, and you wouldn't be able to stop me."

Azriel's response was swift and deadly serious. "Try it, and it will be the last thing you do." His wings unfurled dramatically as he snatched Lyris’ wrist in a powerful grip, the span of dark membrane filling the room with a sense of otherworldly power. The shadows around him deepened, swirling in response to his anger and the protective fury that laced every syllable.

The standoff stretched, a moment suspended in time where every breath, every heartbeat was laden with potential violence. Then, with a jerk, Lyris wrenched free, stepping back into the protective shroud of darkness. “She will never be free from me," he hissed, his presence oppressive, suffocating. "And neither will you."

Then, as suddenly as he had appeared, he dissolved into shadows, leaving a cold void in his wake. His final words echoed ominously, a malevolent promise hanging in the air. As the immediate threat vanished, Azriel’s demeanor shifted, the lethal warrior receding to reveal his concern. He turned to me, his intense gaze softening. “Are you alright?” His voice was now a gentle whisper, a stark contrast to the deadly thunder from moments before.

I collapsed back against the pillows, my body trembling uncontrollably. The fear wasn't just about the physical presence of Lyris—it was the emotional and psychological terror, the deep scars he had left on my soul, that overwhelmed me.

Azriel sat beside me, enveloping me in his arms, his presence a solid, reassuring force against the lingering echoes of dread. "I'm here. You're safe," he murmured against my hair, his voice a soothing balm.

Tears streamed down my cheeks, sobs wracking my body as the terror slowly ebbed away, replaced by immense fatigue. "We have to get them back, Azriel. I need to feel whole again."

His embrace tightened, a silent promise of unyielding support. "We will," he assured me quietly. "No matter what it takes, we will bring them back.” He took a deep breath, his arms tightening around me as if he were scared that I might run from him. “Always, I will protect you. From him, from anyone who dares to threaten you,” he murmured into my hair, his breath warm against my scalp. His wings, now gently wrapped around us, formed a cocoon that felt impenetrable.

Settling back against him, I allowed the warmth of his embrace to seep deeper into my bones, expelling the lingering chill of Lyris's visit. His presence was a bastion, within which I found not only protection but a profound sense of belonging.

As we lay back down, the room once again shrouded in the soothing silence of night, a new resolve fortified my spirit. Lyris had found me, yes, but he had not found me alone, nor would he ever. Azriel’s vow to protect me was more than a promise—it was a declaration, a sentinel set against the darkness, both within and without. As sleep beckoned once more, the shadows no longer seemed an ominous threat lurking in the corners but allies, guardians cloaked in the same darkness that wrapped around us, a shield against all that would do harm.

(Late Summer, Cassian)

The morning after Lyris's intrusion, the House of Wind seemed to hold its breath, an unspoken tension palpable in the air. Everyone had shared their worries for her, our friend who had clawed her way back from that bastard's torment. We all worried, we all loved her so greatly, enjoyed the way her presence warmed Azriel’s cold exterior and to see her fall back into that dark place she had fought her way out of, to take Azriel unknowingly with her again, it poured a dark sense of grief over the house.

But amidst the uncertainty, the deep seeded fear of losing our friend once more, there was a glimmer of light, a beacon of hope cutting through the darkness. Entering the kitchen, I was met with a scene that caught me off guard—our friend, her laughter ringing out like a bell as she shared a moment of levity with Azriel. It was a rare sight, one that stirred a mixture of surprise and quiet satisfaction within me.

Azriel, usually cloaked in shadows both literal and metaphorical, had a small, genuine smile playing at the corners of his lips. His usually guarded demeanor seemed to soften in her presence, and I couldn't help but notice the subtle shift in the air between them.

Their interaction spoke volumes, a silent language of understanding and companionship that transcended words. Despite the trials they had faced, there was a sense of comfort and familiarity in their shared laughter, a reminder that even in the darkest of times, there was still light to be found in the company of those we held dear.

As I joined them in the kitchen, a silent witness to their shared moment of joy, I couldn't help but feel a surge of gratitude for the bond that had formed between them. Their friendship had weathered storms that would have broken lesser souls, and yet here they were, laughing together as if the weight of the world had been lifted from their shoulders.

And as I observed them, surrounded by the warmth of their laughter and the comfort of their companionship, I couldn't help but feel a surge of hope for the future. For in the bond between her and Azriel, I saw strength, resilience, and the promise of brighter days ahead.

(Late Summer, The House of Wind)

The day had been long and daunting, with every passing moment feeling like a test of endurance. The worry from my friends was palpable, their concern etched into every glance and every word. It wasn’t that I didn’t appreciate their care—it was their hovering, their treating me like a fragile thing, that grated against my newfound sense of strength. But amidst it all, there was Azriel.

He stood as a steadfast anchor amidst the storm, a silent guardian who watched over me with unwavering determination. While others fretted and fussed, he remained at my side, a silent sentinel who seemed to understand without the need for words. His presence alone was enough to bolster my spirits, to remind me that I was not alone in this struggle.

Throughout the day, I found myself stealing glances at him, marveling at the depth of his care. How had I not noticed it before? His gaze lingered on me with a mixture of concern and understanding, his eyes a window to the depths of his soul. It was as if he saw straight through the facade I presented to the world, recognizing the strength within me even when I doubted it myself.

As evening descended and the weight of the day settled upon us, we retreated to the familiar sanctuary of my room. Azriel had made it his own, his presence a comforting presence in the darkness. The routine of preparing for bed had become second nature to us—changing into pajamas, brushing our teeth side by side, and slipping under the covers as Azriel performed his meticulous check of the room.

In the quiet moments before sleep claimed us, we lay in silence, each lost in our own thoughts. I couldn’t help but feel a sense of gratitude for Azriel's unwavering support, for his steadfast presence that had seen me through the darkest of days. It was a bond forged in the crucible of adversity, a connection that defied explanation yet felt more real than anything I had ever known.

“Azriel?” I called softly into the night, my voice barely a whisper.

He turned to me, his eyes reflecting the soft glow of the moonlight filtering through the window. For a moment, we simply gazed at each other, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy in the air. And then, with a small smile, he reached out, pulling me closer until I was nestled against his chest.

At that moment, as I lay nestled against Azriel's chest, something shifted between us—a subtle yet profound change that altered the very fabric of our connection. It was as if the air crackled with an invisible energy, a tangible tension that seemed to draw us closer together.

I felt it first, the unmistakable sensation of the mating bond snapping into place with a sudden clarity that took my breath away. It was as if a veil had been lifted, revealing a truth that had always been there, hidden beneath the surface. The primal need to be close to him, to feel his presence as an extension of my own, suddenly made perfect sense.

And then, as if in response to my realization, Azriel let out a small gasp, his arms tightening around me with a fierce urgency that mirrored my own. It was a primal, instinctual reaction, as if some ancient part of him recognized the significance of this moment and refused to let me go.

In that instant, all doubts and uncertainties melted away, replaced by a profound sense of clarity and understanding. We were bound together, our souls intertwined in a way that transcended the physical realm. And as I gazed into Azriel's eyes, I knew that no matter what trials lay ahead, we would face them together, united by the unbreakable bond that now bound us.

"I'll protect you, ensure you are safe and happy and loved," Azriel vowed, his voice a soothing melody that wrapped around me like a warm embrace, promising sanctuary in the depths of his love.

Tears welled in my eyes as his words washed over me, a flood of emotions threatening to overwhelm my fragile resolve. "As will I," I replied, my voice trembling with the weight of my own commitment, my heart laid bare before him in a moment of raw vulnerability.

His eyes, pools of darkness tinged with golden fire, bore into mine with a fierce intensity, piercing through the walls I had built around my heart. "Throughout all the seasons you will be mine, if that is what you want?" His voice was a whisper, yet it echoed through the chambers of my soul, stirring something deep within me that I could no longer deny.

With a trembling breath, I reached out to him, my fingers trembling as they traced the contours of his face, memorizing every line, every scar, every shadow that danced across his skin. "There is no one else I would rather share them with," I confessed, my voice barely above a whisper, the truth of my words ringing out in the quiet room like a sacred vow.

And in that moment, as our souls intertwined in the golden threads of the mating bond, I felt a surge of emotion wash over me, overwhelming in its intensity. It was as if the weight of a thousand lifetimes had been lifted from my shoulders, replaced by a sense of peace and belonging that I had longed for all my life.

With tears streaming down my cheeks, I pressed my forehead against his, our breaths mingling in the space between us as we stood on the precipice of eternity. In that sacred embrace, we found refuge from the storms that had battered our souls, forging a connection that would endure the trials of time. And as we surrendered to the pull of the mating bond, our hearts beat as one, a symphony of love and devotion that echoed through the halls of the House of Wind.

Together, we would face the challenges that lay ahead, our bond a beacon of hope in the darkness, guiding us through the labyrinth of life with unwavering strength and unwavering love.

For in each other's arms, we had found our home, our sanctuary, our forever. And as the night enveloped us in its embrace, we knew that no matter what trials awaited us, we would face them together, united in a love that was destined to last for all eternity.

[PREVIOUS]

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cooki3face · 11 months

Text

why are they silent?

message: I’m feeling called to do this reading so I’m doing it. My posting and content schedule was literally all planned out and organized but I am unfortunately the embodiment of chaos however organized so now everything is all jumbled up. I think I’d love to have a little schedule and do all these wonderful things but I don’t believe that it’s really indefinitely the right direction for me to go in. I’m naturally spontaneous, I kind of go against the grain and go my own way all the time naturally and have done so since I was a child and so I think it’s time I live in my reality and find some acceptance here lol. I’m in the process of working through my drafts I have countless readings set up to be written and posted that I haven’t even tackled yet. Well anyways, hope this brings you peace and clarity.

***

Guys, *deep dramatic sigh”, this person has a lot to say. I can’t stop channeling. It’s running through me like water lol. You could’ve stopped speaking to this person, cut them off, or cut them off from your energy all together here. Someone feels like something is incredibly unfair or unjust. They may feel like the world or the most high is against them and they feel like you slipping away from them is a manifestation of what it means to hit rock bottom. But , I don’t see you able to romanticize this, this person, this behavior, their feelings for you (any longer) you’ve expanded much too big or experienced what it means to be valued and you’re never going back there or you simply don’t resonate with this at this time.

channeled:

teenage dirt bag

I smoked away my brain- asap rocky

“Lowlife energy”

Disrespectful/disrespect

Peter Pan syndrome

“I don’t want to grow up.”

Catalyst

Life lessons

“Bigger than me” “you’re bigger than me.” “Larger than life.”

“It’s above me now.” “It’s out of my hands.”

Looking to the moon for answers

666- “a reminder to refocus and find balance in your life.” “a positive and transformative message from the celestial realm, representing self-discovery and spiritual essence.”

777- “linked to self-discovery and personal growth” “a signal to get present with what's going on between you and your significant other”

8891- “centers around personal growth and development”

786- “centers around personal growth and development” “healing and self-care. This number encourages you to take time for yourself and to focus on your own well-being”

**the angel numbers were insane, confirmation on confirmation***

Temptation

“The devil”

Forbidden fruit

Forbidden love

Unrequited. Unrequited love

“Are you finished with me?”

“Can I be your shadow?”

“Within you.”

Karmic cycles

Mirror

“See you again” -Tyler the creator, kali uchis

“Can I get a kiss? And can you make it last forever? Because, I’m about to go to war and I don’t know if im going to see you again.”

“La la la” “ok ok ok”

Feminine/masculine

Opposites

Ends of the spectrum

Redbone- childish gambino

***

Someone is coming to a conclusion about you and about themselves through you. I get mirror energy here this could be twin flame connection that you’re keeping small here. There’s imagery of someone trying to blow out a candle, or a flame that’s flickering and small. It’s not being fed. A fire that’s dying. Whomever this person is, they’re receiving their karma for who they were to you, for not making the right decisions, for being disrespectful, for stumbling through life like it’s a joke. Your spirit guides, ancestors, deities, the divine, stand behind you so fiercely. Someone is feeling some sort of wrath here for who they were to you or what they’ve done to you. I just heard, “you’ll know loss.” Someone is going to have to rise out of the ashes like a phoenix, exorcise parts of them that have kept them stuck, be physically pulled away from karmic cycles and habits. Someone says, “they aren’t learning. They aren’t moving.”

They’re feeling very restless and burnt out here. Someone’s tired of fighting. Someone’s being brought to their knees. “I hear you haven’t seen or felt rock bottom yet.” I even hear an ancestor saying, “watch this.” I’m getting the imagery of very divine and large beings sitting in a row of chairs. Almost like the last supper or the imagery of it and looking down on what’s happening attentively. This person is undergoing large heart chakra openings or having an awakening here. The imagery of the ace of swords gives me the energy of someone pulling a sword from the earth, after it’s been buried for ages. Someone is finally picking up their sword or stepping into their power here. But I see you being completely inattentive to this here. If you’re even reading this right now this is a privilege to them to have you sit and see what it is they’re going through. Someone’s not available and has made themselves unavailable or out of reach.

This person is so stubborn, they’re hard headed, and they’ve sorted planted themselves firmly in their place and have refused to move. They’re obsessed with status or are obsessed with keeping up some sort of facade or reputation to protect themselves or make them appear invulnerable, heartless, reckless and damaging. This person could like to fight, could be someone whose met with a lot of criticism or always is pushing up against or things. Using or manipulating some sort of influence. I see you coming to terms with this person and not resonating with who they are and not seeing any admirable qualities within this person any longer. This person is going to have to fight their way through the thick of the situation that they’ve built for themselves, undergoing inner purging, arising out of karmic cycles, disconnecting from karmic connections in all sorts and shapes.

This person is avoiding making hard decisions and setting themselves apart from others and owning up to their mistakes and actions. Something about this persons lack of accountability may trigger deep childhood wounds within you of some sort or be a pet peeve that you dislike very intensely in others that you now dislike very intensely within them. This person has to make a choice. The right one this time after a long time of playing games with the divine and playing games within the lives of others. They’re going to have to be reborn and undergo immense transformation and change. And this is what is going on. There’s a massive tower moment in store for them they you won’t be there for or won’t be a bystander in. This is for them to experience all on their own. It’s very likely that you may find this persons demise satisfying or be apathetic towards their hard ship at this time, I almost typed heart ship. You may be apathetic toward their internal conflict and heartbreak as well. It’s a long time coming I heard.

Someone is allowing the scales to be balanced out and protecting themselves by being nowhere near this incoming explosion or tower moment. They won’t be stepping in, helping to protect this person from their karma, or hiding this person away from their shadows. I’m getting imagery of the shadow man or Dr. facilliers death in the princess and the frog. This person is so unattractive to you right now. After a long time potentially of being your wish fulfillment and end all be all.

Messages:

“ I’m scared somebody will take you from me.”

“ I let others interfere with our connection.”

“Go back to our spot.”

“I want to call/text you, but I’m afraid you won’t answer.”

“The warmth of your hands keeps my insecurities away.”

“Don’t give my love to anybody else.”

“I was too stubborn to admit that you were my person.”

“I need closure from you.”

***

ii.

everything is okay pile two, you can relax. You may feel tension in your neck, your back, and feel a lack of energy in your legs or have some leg pain. You’re purging energies, undergoing transformation, and getting ready to accept more gifts and more happiness. Make sure you prioritize your rest, your eating and your overall health. The color blue could be significant, beige or light shades of brown, the color white, doves, crows, cats, and spiders. Snakes as well. If you feel lost, answers are on the way. If you feel alone and/or abandoned, spirit is always standing with you and protecting you. Spirit will not allow you to be mislead, be hurt, or be put in situations that will destroy you. Your spirit guides and ancestors commend you. I hear round of applause, whistling, and chants of encouragement. I actually left and took my ass to bed after pile one because pile one’s energy was crazy asl, I actually know pile one in real life. Bless their heart for real. ANYWAYS!!

channeled:

Tangled up in you- the Alton’s

Heart to heart- Mac Demarco

Let’s stay together- al green

Tell it like it is- Aaron Neville

I put a spell on you- Nina Simone

Fade into you- mazzy star

Relaxation

Inner peace

Fulfillment

222 - you’re on the right path. “signifies good fortune in finances, relationships, and career, as well as a reminder to work towards your soul's purpose.” “symbolize balance, harmony, and spiritual alignment” “the time has come for you to be more self-reflective, and focused on the duality of situations”

444 - your spirit guides are protecting and supporting you. “conveys a powerful message of love, support, and guidance from your angels”

22 - “welcome balance, wisdom, and divine transformation into your life.”

12 - “something in your life has been completed, and it's time to turn your attention away from the past and look into the future.”

896 - personal growth & development. “896 encourages you to put your devotion and efforts towards your spiritual passions and interests, in turn, manifesting abundance and plenty into your life”

888 - “positive flow, abundance, and rewards are coming your way.” “Stay open to abundance in whatever form it appears, not just what we expect or want”

8 - infinite possibilities

0 - “the number 0 is ultimately about unconditional love. "The force of love is around you all the time, taking the form of other people, opportunities, and even moments of clarity”

65 - “Angel Number 65 is giving you a message from the guardian angels that your efforts to transform and improve your life are being appreciated by the divine energies.”

100 - “symbol of new beginnings, manifestation, and spiritual guidance.” “aligning oneself with eternity while finding balance between our inner world and outer reality so that true harmony may exist within us.”

110 - “it’s time to manifest your dreams.”

Sleep

Relaxation

Careful consumption of media

Deciding on morals & boundaries

Candles

Journaling

Shadow work

Smoke cleansing

Water cleansing

Detox

Rejuvenation

Chrysalis

Hibernation

Mother Nature

Mother Earth

The Moon

Menstrual cycle

Divine feminine energy

The metaphysical

Inner child

Inner compass

Erykah badu

***

pile two… this person.. this person.. I’m so obsessed. This person is open and genuine. They may have expressed to you so much already but anything their withholding is more and further confirmation of deeper feelings and desire to do more for you and offer you more love and more peace. You may be in a relationship with this person, this gives committed relationship vibes, it doesn’t give situationship vibes, nothing is in the air, there’s no dust kicked up or fog that’s obstructing the clarity of the situation. It is what the two of you say it is, it looks like exactly what it is. It sounds like exactly what it is, devotion. Amy winehouse “love is a losing game” just came on, I have it playing on my tv and I just turned it up because it’s playing so quietly all of a sudden when my volume is already high and everything else was loud and clear.

It kind of gives me the impression that anything within the energy of loss and heartbreak is over and silenced. Spirit is covering your ears and covering your eyes to perspectives and ideas that aren’t in alignment with this connection and the love you share. The song just ended, “tell it like it is” just came on, blaring loud I was like 🫨🫨🫨. This person is a real man or a real woman. They’re ready to love you, to give you everything. They’re asking that you be honest and bare your soul and tell me them how you feel. Pride aside, fear aside. This person loves you beyond the fear and ego. I’m getting sensual energy, it’s deep and it’s passionate lol I feel like someone is squeezing my heart right now. This person applies pressure or they really get you riled up. I’m feeling all of this persons feelings. I hear my heart in my ears, you know those chills you get when you listen to oldies, the blues, or that STANK face you make when you feel something deep in your spirit. This person is in your spirit, coursing through your veins right now lol. I haven’t even began reading through the cards. UGH! Unhand me immediately!!!

This is like an intensely passionate saxophone solo. If this person is silent in any way, it’s because they’re trying to take action in their lives to get themselves in a position to show you how much they love you in a material and physical aspect. They already have laid out so much love for you to have but they want to give you more. They want to over fill your cup. They fill your cup. Your cup is full but I keep hearing “more.” I’m seeing imagery here of a divine masculine giving you everything in his pockets or anything that he has and carries with him. For some of you this is a divine masculine energy. They know your love and devotion isn’t free and isn’t cheap. They’re willing to put it all on the line. They’re even becoming more enlightened spiritually. I see the imagery of the five of pentacles and one of the men on the card is looking up the sky here. This person is looking to the heavens behind you, looking to the divine, to the moon, to spirit. Showing their gratitude, asking for and manifesting success for them to give you, asking for and manifesting safety and protection over this connection.

This person is not undecided about you, they’ve made a decision. They have some self doubt about how well they’ll be able to show up for you or how able they will be to provide you with everything you deserve because they smell your divinity, they wouldn’t do wrong by you, betray you, or give you less than what you deserve. I’m hearing “don’t” by Bryson tiller. This person feels sorry for your exes. This person is ready to give you everything and do anything on your behalf and it only gets more intense everyday. This person is in their bag or about to be, making plans for the two of you, planning a future for the two of you, making decisions and making choices behind you and your influence and your presence in their life. Financial choices, spiritual choices, emotional choices.

This person is thinking of all the things the two of you can do together or build together it’s their primary focus. Any of this persons silence is them exercising self restraint or making room for you or for this connection to unfold and blossom naturally. They want you to feel safe and feel valued despite how passionate they feel or how much they want to envelope you in all of their love and desire. This person is levitating right now. They often feel they have to take moments to pull back and gather up their energy and bring themselves down from a high or an obsessive part of them that feels driven to you.

This person, in their silence, is constantly thinking about more ways to be honest with you, value your boundaries, express their own, communicate their feelings to you. This person wants to earn your trust and your devotion.

messages:

“ save the date.”

“ will you marry me?”

This person is most definitely thinking long term commitment, sees you as someone who could be their wife or husband. Wants to live harmoniously with you and have you for a long time ❤️

“you’re a witch.”

This person feels as though you have so much power over them. They constantly feel your influence. You could be into witchcraft or be into spirituality and manifestation and they believe in your power and divinity wholeheartedly. They don’t doubt you.

“You have so much power over me.”

“Healing my mother wound.”

You could’ve brought to light some maternal issues within this person or opened their eyes to the gravity of a situation regarding their mother.

“Sending you all my love.”

“You have my undivided attention.”

“Open your heart to me. Let me in.”

“Please wait for me.”

***

iii.

This reading is being done in such immensely high and free floating energy. Someone is relaxing into something or surrendering, I’m getting imagery of someone being fully submerged into something warm or something with healing properties or that has the intention of transforming and rejuvenating them and restoring magic within the spirit. I’m getting Steve lacy - infrunami. Someone was hiding in plain sight here or may have been hiding away on purpose but the both of you are being met with true devotion from one another. There’s a lot of passion and longing I’m feeling. Someone misses someone or has plans to come to someone and be near them. Spirit is telling me, “I’m giving you space to miss one another or come to terms with who one another really are and what you meant to one another after a long time of being right underneath each others noses” there’s this energy of truths being revealed, the light or divinity in someone or the both of you being revealed. Someone within this collective may be drawn to pile two or have messages in two piles.

channeled:

Love on the brain - Rihanna

Infrunami - Steve Lacy

Tears dry on their own - Amy winehouse

Mercy mercy - Marvin Gaye

Let’s stay together - Al Green

Wet dreamz - J. Cole

CPR - Summer Walker

Trust - Brent Faiyaz

(There is) no greater love - amy winehouse

Just another interlude- Bryson tiller

Glory box- Portishead

Wholeness

Accepting love

Energy of recieving

Gifts

Divine timing

Divine plan

“Proud of you.”

Appreciation

Music

66 - “a powerful symbol of balance and harmony.”

67 - “you are on the right path and to keep going.” “prosperity and good fortune are on their way.”

68 - “your angels are encouraging you to take a leap of faith and start something new”

88 - “great success, abundance, and prosperity.” “ This number's presence is a positive sign for matters of the heart, often associated with the abundance of love and blessings.”

99 - “spiritual growth and awakening” “it confirms that your bond is based on mutual respect, understanding, and love. But, there's always an opportunity to enter a new phase of even deeper connection.”

600 - “Your material security and wellbeing are protected. Balance, harmony, and stability in your relationships. Spiritual growth and higher understanding.”

666 - “ a positive and transformative message from the celestial realm, representing self-discovery and spiritual essence”

789 - “number centers around healing and self-care. This number encourages you to take time for yourself and to focus on your own well-being. It serves as a reminder that it's important to make sure your emotional, physical, and spiritual health are all taken care of.”

884 - “ a powerful reminder that you should stay open to what life brings your way. It's time to trust that everything is happening for a reason. The angels are reminding you to stay in alignment with your heart and soul. If you do, the universe will aspire to bring you what you need.”

200 - “conveys a message of hope and optimism for your future endeavors”

211 - “guides us to maintain balance and harmony within our relationships.” “a positive omen that learning to trust yourself will set you free”

Equal give & take

Space to be yourself

Satisfaction

Overcoming fears

Emotional stability

Messages/calls

Abundance

Self-care

Singing

Throat chakra

Chakra activation

Kundalini activation

Intense physical & emotional intimacy

Support

Devotion

Red roses

Vinyl records

1970s

History

***

This person is carrying with them a lot of emotional stress and burdens here but I also see them carrying themselves almost. Like they’re trying to hold themselves back from coming face to face with you on a deep and personal level. This person is having hard time and is tired and a little burnt out from feeling as though they have to suppress their devotion or their love for you. This person is incredibly attached to you as well as sexually attracted to you. They may hide from you or try to create space between the two of you so that you won’t see just how much they like you or how much they want to be with you, how much they want to be intensely intimate with you. This person overthinks a lot, they’re an anxious person and they’re afraid of embarrassing themselves in front of you or disappointing you. This person also feels like they might inconvenience you greatly by being authentic with you due to past connections and heart break that made them seem or feel like they weren’t important or valued or weren’t owed loyalty or devotion because of the way they were when they they showed up honestly. This persons needs weren’t met and their nervous system is in overdrive trying to overcome their fear of being close to someone again despite how much they love they hold for you in their heart.

Someone in this persons past may have gaslit them or told them that they weren’t as special as they advertised themselves to be or that their love and support wasn’t genuine or wasn’t worth fighting for or sticking around for or their portrayed this to them through actions. This person has been tired, carrying a lot of tension in their bodies, or are burnt out from how much energy it takes for them to keep themselves from you. Heard the worst by Jhene aiko, not necessarily the whole entire song but “I don’t need you but I want you.” And “I don’t mean to, but I love you.” But this person, they’re afraid, because they think that they love you but are afraid to tell you or reveal their love to you through words and action. This person feels as though you’re meant for them and they constantly feel the need to apologize for pushing you away or holding off from you out of fear.

This person adores you, they care for you genuinely, and they feel they’ve been blessed with and given divine love. You may come as a surprise to this person, you catch them off guard, or appeal to them in a profound way due to past experiences. I hear this person hoping and wishing that nothing takes you away from them. This person is in a constant state of healing and transformation in order to accept you. Manifesting their fear away, taking steps to let you see them, practicing putting down their weapons, leaving their past in the past, and breaking down the walls they’ve built around themselves in order to call and manifest true love and now you’ve arrived and the walls are ready to come crashing down. This person is reprioritizing things within their life as well. They could’ve had to shift into their dark feminine energy if this is a feminine energy. This person could’ve had to remove people from their lives, undergo a lot of purging, awakening and healing in order to put themselves in their divinely ordained position to receive love and love themselves.

This person is coming to terms with the fact that the worst is over and they won’t have to fight anymore and that they can fall into you finally and be taken care of and loved correctly. They’re in the process of coming to terms with the fact that the past is in the past and they no longer have to revisit it or hold onto it. That they’re safe. That nothing else can harm them any longer.

messages:

“Every song reminds me of you.”

“You taught me what real love is.”

“Divine masculine.”

you represent true masculine energy to this person. True divine masculine energy. Especially if you identify as the divine masculine within this connection.

“You have a lot of heart.”

“Lover.”

“I’m sorry I pushed you away. I didn’t understand you, I didn’t understand my feelings.”

“Forgive me.”

“My souls purpose is to love you & be loved by you.”

*double confirmation about spending time apart.*

***

Hope this served you right and brought you Justice and true clarity! I enjoyed curating this reading, thank you for co-creating my reading by being apart of the beautiful collective, by loving my work, by being patient with me! You are so loved and valued. ❤️!

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ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes · 2 years

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The Phoenix and the Crow

pairing: (future) kaz brekker x fem!reader

genre: nutural

el's thoughts: this was by far my favorite request ever haha submitted by @rachelcarroll1819 *mwah* love you for this, thank you! this is part one and there's a sneak peak at part two at the bottom! this is following the show plot line (season one). also this one is kinda short... but i couldn't find a proper place to cut it off soooo... sorry. i hope y'all like it

masterlist

In order to rise from its own ashes, a phoenix must first burn. That’s what Y/N reminded herself over and over again. It’s just a stage of life, it’ll get better and you’ll always come back stronger. She scoffed, “Some phoenix.” Aren’t the birds supposed to be powerful, elegant, and brave? Then why was she running away? Out of fear?

Yes.

Alina grunted when she tripped on a tree root and fell to her knee. “C’mon, darling, we have to keep going.” Y/N helped her up with a quiet sigh and quickly checked behind them to make sure they weren’t being followed. The sun summoner nodded and kept walking behind her mentor figure.

Alina was extremely grateful for the grisha who took her under her wing when she first arrived at the little palace. Teaching her the ways of grisha and helping her adjust any way she could. Saving her a seat at meals to spare her from the embarrassment of standing at the front, searching for a seat. Within the last few weeks Y/N became like an older sister, even if there was only a few years age gap between the two.

“We’re almost at the docs, then we’ll be out of here.”

The moment Y/N realized what the Darkling had planned for Alina she was planning her own escape. She knew she needed to get the sun summoner out of the little palace as fast as possible in order to stop the nightmare-ish horrors that were in store for their country.

The rustling of leaves were heard behind the pair causing them to stop and turn around, arms raised in defense. “Mal.” Alina’s voice came out in a breathless relief. She rushed forward and wrapped her arms around him at which Y/N turned around to give them their moment of reunion. After a few minutes and hushed whispers behind her, she cleared her throat “Okay, we really must get a move on now.”

“So you want to go after the stag instead of running away?” Y/N had a smirk on her face as she watched Alina wring her hands. “Yes?” “It’s either a solid yes or no, no maybe.” The younger girl took in a breath, “Yes. I want to go after the stag.” The y/e/c eyed girl smiled proudly, “Perfect.”

So the journey continues. Sunlight was spent hiking and the nights, huddled close to Alina to stay warm since fire was out of the option. Y/N could feel the need to use to power growing stronger and stronger, her hands got so warm she thought fire might start on accident. She needed just to let out a single spark to dampen the burning temptation. While following the couple walking ahead she let a single flame lick through her fingers, swirling around her wrist before diving back into her palm. Her smile was so bright and soft as Alina looked over her shoulder to check that she was still there.

Using their power makes a grisha stronger, and not being able to use it properly had taken a toll on the older girl, making the younger slightly guilty. Y/N had no reason to stick with them, she could leave and go find her own way if she wanted to… So why has she stayed? Alina furrowed her eyebrows, mentally searching for a reason that her mentor would stay.

“We’re almost there… It should be just around-” Mal cut himself off once the stag came into view. Y/N stared wide eyed, “Oh… It’s real.” She moved closer to Alina and Mal, waiting for them to take their aim, but right before the could fire, she noticed black whisps of smoke curling through the snow. She quickly let a small flame flicker through her fingers as she felt his presence creeping up behind them. “Alina-”

Everything happened in a blur, the stag was brought to the floor, Alina threw up a sun shield around herself, the stag and Mal. Y/N held her hands out infront of her her flames followed her arm movements like whips keeping the other grisha back. Black smoke circled her ankel keeping her firmly planted in her place, panic bubbled in her chest when she made eye contact with Ivan. Her eyes pleaded with him to which he only slightly shook his head. The last thing she saw was the Darkling standing over her with a look of pity, before her eyes closed on their own acord and her heart slowed to the point of unconsciousness.

“Heartrenders…” Y/N grumbled as she was finally able to move and control her body. She had started to wake up a while ago, first her mind then her toes up to her fingers, the tingling sensation crawling it’s way up till she was able to fully move. Her vision cleared slowly, the sunlight streaming into the tent through the waving flaps of the entrance.

Rising to her feet, she made her way to the tent entrance after gulping down a glass of water. One gaurd stood in front of her making her sigh silently. With a flick of her fingers a singular flame danced across the dirt floor to a pile of straw and some explosive crates. A high pitched yelp left the guard’s lips as he ran over desperately pulling the crates away from the growing fire. With a smug smile, Y/N slipped on a first army coat and stumbled a bit as she made her way to the crowds of people.

Alina Starkov came into sight as the inferni quickly mimicked everyone’s hands over her own chest. The sandskiff. Y/N’s eyes darted around as she thought of a way to get herself on that vessel.

“I still can’t believe the age on this.” Y/N’s attention snapped to the voice belonging to a tall zeminni man. “There is no way they’ll believe this.” “Sure they will. Now keep quiet.” A suli girl and kerch followed the taller of the trio closely. She watched as they slipped into line soundlessly, seemingly belonging to the crowd if only she hadn’t overheard their conversation.

sneak peak at part two:

“Who are you?”

Y/N rolled her eyes, “Y/N L/N, inferni. Lieutenent General of the second army. Well, ex-lieutenent, I now assume.” A gasp slipped from the person behind her and she was instantly released from their hold. The suli girl for before step around her and moved to stand beside the other two. The trio looked like a rough patch group of criminals. Ketterdam. She could only assume that’s where they’re from. “Now it’s only polite to tell me who you are given I just told you who I am. Very willingly, mind you, I could’ve easily set a controlled fire loose.”

“Jesper Fahey,” said the tallest of the group.

“Inej Ghafa.”

“Brekker.” His rich coffee brown eyes bore into her’s as if trying to read her soul. The dark lighting casted shadows over his sharp facial features. “Kaz Brekker.” His voice held much reluctance as he spoke his name.

“And I’m safe to assume you’re all criminals. Now that leaves me with one last question…” She spun on her heel and walked around, throwing glances over her shoulder every so often, inspecting the room. “What business do you have on this skiff?”

#ellora.writes #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker x y/n #six of crows #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagines #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone imagines

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midnightsslut · 1 month

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Since you’re so good at connecting songs (I’m still in awe about how you made me realize that atw and illicit affairs are about the same subject), what is your most big brain/audacious/out there theory/connection about Taylor’s songs?

first of all, thank you! i have to say, I’m not the first one to get the idea that there are parallels between those two songs, but I’d never really sat down with them line by line. this ask really got me wondering because i feel like there are a lot of parallels I can think of but idk how out there they are. here is one that i don’t see people talking about a lot:

coney island feels like the other perspective of the story in you’re losing me, especially when you consider that taylor asked matt berninger about writing songs that deal with their own relationship issues with his wife. of course, coney island and you’re losing me were written at different points in their relationship, but the sentiment appears to be the same.

this got long, so I’m putting a cut here.

first of all, here is how taylor described coney island in her evermore interview with zane lowe (around the 37-minute mark)

The perspective I was coming from was like a male perspective of regret or guilt after a lifetime of apattern of behavior, and i've been kind of touching on sort of things like that on the song tolerate it where there's this person one side of the relationship who's felt like they've just… Their partner's been there, but they haven't *been* there. They've been there, but they're just sitting next to each other, eating breakfast, but they haven't they haven't been there […] I really loved writing, ‘we were like the mall before the internet / it was the one place to be.’ I was trying to reflect on the coney island visual of a place where thrills were once sought, you know, a place where once it was all electricity and magic, and now the lights are out, and you're looking at it, thinking ‘what did I do?’

‘break my soul in two, looking for you, but you’re right here’ —> ‘you say “I don’t understand,” I say “I know you don’t”’

‘and if this is the long haul, how’d we get here so soon?’ —> ‘how long could we be a sad song before we’re too far gone to bring back to life?’

‘did I close my fist around something delicate? did I shatter you?’ —> ‘my face was gray, but you wouldn’t admit that we were sick.’

‘over and over, lost again with no surprises / disappointments, close your eyes / and it gets colder and colder when the sun goes down’ —> ‘i’m getting tired even for a phoenix / always rising from the ashes, mending all her gashes’

‘what’s a lifetime of achievement if I pushed you to the edge, but you were too polite to leave me?’ —> ‘fighting in only your army, frontlines, don’t you ignore me / I’m the best thing at this party’

‘do you miss the rogue who coaxed you into paradise and left you there?’ —> ‘and the air is thick with loss and indecision’

‘will you forgive my soul when you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?’ —> ‘now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it’s time’

‘the mischief, the gift-wrapped suburban dreams’ —> ‘remember looking at this room? we loved it cause of the light’

‘sorry for not winning you an arcade ring’ —> ‘choose something, babe, I got nothing to believe unless you’re choosing me’

‘did I leave you hanging every single day?’ —> ‘every morning, I glared at you with storms in my eyes’

‘did I paint your bluest skies the darkest gray a universe away?’ —> ‘my face was gray, but you wouldn’t admit that we were sick’

‘and when I got into the accident, the sight that flashed before me was your face’ —> ‘now you’re running down the hallway / and you know what they all say / you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone’

‘but when I walked up to the podium, i think that i forgot to say your name’ —> ‘don’t you ignore me, I’m the best thing at this party’

you’re losing me is key to the entirety of ttpd, really, so this gives us the ability to draw parallels to sooo many songs on the album. coney island is a goldmine actually. no wonder she’s mashed it up with so many songs on tour.

my next post will be connecting right where you left me and chloe et al whenever I get around to it (to be clear, I don’t think they’re about the same person).

#coney island #i was just thinking about how there are a few songs on evermore that I don’t understand the origins of super well #but I think I get coney island pretty well now #evermore #you’re losing me #parallels #midnights #ylm

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adorastarot · 1 year

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A message from BTS for you - Mini reading

Hii everyone and welcome to my second PAC reading! Today we are asking for a message from BTS for you <3 I hope that this PAC reading will help you understand the present better and help move towards the future that you want to manifest!

How to choose a pile: Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Ask the universe if there is a message that you need to hear right now. You may either hear a number or be drawn to a pack once you open your eyes! If the message doesn't resonate then it may not be for you.

♡ Want a personal reading? Check out my Ko-fi

Pile 1

2 of cups, king of wands, the hanged man, knight of wands, 7 of pentacles

Jin & Namjoon are stepping up for this message, the colours are red, orange and yellow. The energy feels very vibrant but calm?! They’re not excited per se, they just want to be present today and help light a fire in you.

“Slow down when it comes to romance, not every frog will turn into a prince charming (not everyone can be as handsome as me *wink* - Jin) You may be trying too hard right now to find your other half, might be giving chance after chance to people who aren’t worthy of you. You have to take a break, otherwise, you will end up sacrificing the most important things to you - love, integrity, passion and stability in exchange for the desire that lasts a couple of days. Time is not running out, people sometimes are not what you expect them to be. You will find your soulmate one day, but you have to be ok with your own journey first. Do you love yourself? Even just a bit, even if it’s just some days. What kind of life are you creating? You have put so much work into this - not sit back and enjoy the things that you have achieved. For some of you - what’s the worst that can happen if you stop looking for love? What if you never get married, but find the love of your life tomorrow? Would you be ok with this?

Pile 2

The devil, 8 of swords, knight of cups, 4 of swords, 9 of pentacles

Jimin and Hoseok are coming forward for this one and Yoongi wants to be present but is choosing to stay in the background. The energy of this reading is a bit more…closed off. Associated colours are black, dark blue, royal blue, deep grey.

“The only thing stopping you right now is yourself. You are stopping yourself from achieving greatness but do you even realise you are doing it? Why are you scared? I have your back, we are all here for you so just give it a try. What’s the worst that can happen? You may need to work on attachment and codependent relationships in your life. It’s time to choose heart over wisdom. Be free?! Free yourself of everything that is holding you down. Be careful with those around you - your support group. The people around you can either build you up or knock you down so please make sure that you0 have people around you that deserve to have you around. Even if at times you feel alone, I am here.” You know that video of Jimin saying something like - there is someone here in the city of Seoul who understands you? That’s the image that is coming through, that is what Jimin is wearing and the way he is sat during this message. “Sleep, make sure you sleep better and take the time to relax, enjoy life a little bit more”

Pile 3

Death, knight of pentacles, 2 of swords, 5 of cups, queen of wands

Ok so Taehuyng wants to take this one by himself ahaha his energy right now is very…beige ahahaha that’s the energy of this reading, very pastel-y colours, pastel yellow, pastel blue, pastel purple. He is sat down ready to talk with his face leaning on one hand.

“This is different, right? Did you expect something like this? Oh the amount of change you have been going through this year. You are like a phoenix rising from the ashes. You can’t remember the person that you were in 2022 can you? That’s ok. Take it slowly, baby steps, one step at a time. Let the sadness in your heart become the art of life, let it become your inspiration as you move forward and discover your true self. Be sad, cry if you have to, but at times remember to cry out of happiness too! Try to have those moments of so much happiness that you can’t help but let it all out. You are a force to be reckoned with. Take your time and feel every single emotion as the clock won’t go back and you won’t be able to experience the same thing twice.

Sending all the love your way <3

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azalawa-scroggs · 3 months

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On why I think the "Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth Chooses Death" note was meant literally

I've had this in my drafts for a while after seeing a poll that elicited a little discussion on the topic. I know this is the fandom's majority take on the subject so I'll probably be preaching to the choir, but there (rightly) is discussion about it nonetheless so I felt like giving my arguments.

I'll put it under a read-more just in case people missed the warning in the tags. Considering the topic, naturally, here's a warning for discussion of suicide. Please take care of yourself!

The thing is that Justice For All is very, very ambiguous on that. It does what Ace Attorney is really good at doing - brushing a serious topic then waffling on it until it really doesn't say anything about it, giving itself the benefit of doubt but never making a statement. Both Phoenix and Franziska's dialogue strongly hint that they have a certainty that Edgeworth is still alive, and they're proven right. The narrative doesn't try really hard to sell us the idea that Edgeworth died - Edgeworth is even on the game's box art. I've watched a few JFA walkthroughs hunting for people's reaction to all the Edgeworth talk and his apparent death, and nobody really seems to buy it - either going through great confusion or immediately going like "oh he can't be dead there's no way - he's so coming back."

However. However. It's just impossible to ignore all the subtext that points at the note being real.

The game textually sets up Adrian Andrews as a foil to Franziska. In the parallel Edgeworth draws, Celeste is supposed to represent Manfred - a mentor she admired and whose guidance she lost. But it was a deliberate choice from the writers to have Celeste die by suicide. In the same game that spent a whole game-wide subplot on slowly revealing Edgeworth's apparent death by the exact same means. Edgeworth is the one who gives Phoenix the information about Adrian and Celeste's backstory. And Franziska revealed to us she wasn't seeking revenge for her father, but for her "little brother" - in the parallel between her and Adrian Andrews' stories, it's easy to see Celeste paralleling Edgeworth, not Manfred.

And in fact Adrian is also a clear parallel to Edgeworth himself. He, too, lost the guidance of his mentor and was left questioning everything. In the infamous scene where he interrogates her in the first phase of the trial, he even puts his own words in her mouth.

If you're going to say you would "choose death", that is of no concern to me.

If you consider Rise from the Ashes, Edgeworth's dialogue leaves even less room for doubt regarding his mental state. Compilation:

Edgeworth: Hmph. Some people need very little excuse to think ill of others. It's a fact of life. Impossible to stop. Some of them even go so far as to present me with toys like this… They think it's funny. (Referring to the award he was just given)

Edgeworth: Why, I ask you? Why!? All along, I've done only what I believe is right. I have nothing to be ashamed of! But still... Phoenix: (Wow, I've never seen him this out of sorts...)

Edgeworth: Hmph. I've had to live the past two years with rumors flying around. What's another allegation to me? Ema: Cheer up, Mr. Edgeworth! I'm rooting for you! Phoenix: (That's Edgeworth for you... Always trying to hide his real feelings.)

Edgeworth: There's no excuse for what I've done. Two years ago, I used false evidence to obtain a guilty verdict. That's what it all breaks down to, and nothing I do can erase that fact.

Edgeworth: I'm tired, Mr. Wright. I feel as if… something inside me has died. [...] I know the path I've walked. You don't need to tell me. And the path I've walked... hasn't been a just one. I can't forgive myself for what I've done... and no one else should forgive me either. Phoenix: (Uh oh. I think he's serious!)

Edgeworth: ... It's too late for me. No matter what anyone may say, I realized today that I can't change my own mistakes! Not only that, but I don't even trust myself anymore. Chief Gant was right...

And of course:

Edgeworth: If you'll excuse me… there are still some loose ends that need wrapping up. Take care, Chief Prosecutor. Phoenix: Edgeworth! What will you do now? Edgeworth: ... Phoenix: Well, whatever you do, just remember. What happened in this trial can either make or break you as a prosecutor. In the end, it's up to you. Edgeworth: I know... It seems I owe you my thanks too, Wright. But what I face now... is my problem. Phoenix: Edgeworth... I'll be waiting for you in court. Edgeworth:... Farewell.

I've pulled all my quotes from the wiki, which I believe takes the DS version, but the retranslation of the port makes things even more blatant. Instead of "either make or break you as a prosecutor," the line was retranslated as "You can let what happened kill the prosecutor in you, or you can let it help you grow."

I don't know how much more literal you can get.

Of course, none of this dialogue strictly refers to anything but a professional crisis for Edgeworth. But it is a true crisis, one he takes very deeply and personally - it is his entire moral system that is crumbling down. And the phrasing of some of those lines is downright chilling. "I can't forgive myself, and nobody should do it either" "I feel like something inside me has died" "It's too late for me" or even those ominous "loose ends"... Whatever his final conclusion, he is not doing well. That's one thing RftA makes abundantly clear.

But then why are Phoenix and Franziska so angry, you'll ask me? Grief, of course. Why is Franziska adamant he still lives? Grief, of course - specifically denial. Why does Gumshoe know Edgeworth still lives? Several options. Edgeworth contacted him knowing he'd need someone to help him come back once he decided to come back, or Gumshoe is the one that prevented his note from turning literal, or Edgeworth contacted him at some other point for another reason - it could have happened at any point in his little mental health gap year.

It just makes much more sense to me than the alternative. Why leave a note saying he "chooses death" so unambiguously only to rely on a play on words? He was shown writing a perfectly good resignation letter right before that - the note was meant to be one step further from resignation. And why leave his loved ones in the dark, mourning him, for one entire year if he just deliberately left for soul-searching purposes? The man is obtuse when it comes to feelings, and honestly I could see him pulling this, but... not in conjunction with everything else.

And his arc just makes it make so much sense as well. Depression is often a comorbidity of PTSD, which Edgeworth has, as close to canonically as possible without it being spelled out. He is in an extremely fragile place psychologically - two months earlier his trial dragged him across the coals emotionally, his traumatic past revisited and revealed in an extremely public way. His quest for "perfection" was shattered not just through the losses he suffered at Phoenix's hand but through the sudden, deep and complete betrayal of the man who taught it to him. He only had one moral high ground left - the fact that he never knowingly forged evidence - only for that to be ripped away from him too. Of course he could be nothing less than unstable.

So anyway I don't have any fancy conclusion but yeah I can't imagine "Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth Chooses Death" wasn't meant literally. Even though I'm pretty sure that wasn't the authorial intent, I think it must have been somewhere in the works anyway, otherwise there wouldn't be so many hints to it.

#Ace Attorney #Miles Edgeworth #cw: suicide #Aza talks too much #Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth Chooses Death #cleaning my drafts a little today

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lucasluvia · 1 year

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i care the ranchers very much so i made my own :] headcanons and design description below the cut

[rb > likes || click for quality]

Tango: pretty straight forward. blazeborn/nether hybrid guy. he goes firey when hes got strong emotions.

Jimmy: phoenix hybrid, but instead of rebirth and rising from the ashes and all that he got the short end of the stick. the closest thing to a "cool phoenix power" hes got is he can handle heat better, doesnt burn as easy, and his wings cant be hurt by fire. Also his wings can burn up kind like paper, it can light things around him on fire but the wings have to fully regrow and it hurts EXTREMELY bad. so a person-sized flint and steel essentially. he doesnt want to deal with the teasing of being simultaneously a death omen and failed symbol of life (failure of his biology) so to anyone but tango he lets them think hes just a normal avian.

also theres just a lotta angst potential somewhere in there. i just care them so much and if they wont interact i will make my own content.

Feel free to ask any questions :] i like talking about them so bad

#team rancher #rancher duo #trafficblr #traffic life smp #tangotek #jimmy solidarity #solidaritygaming #dlsmp tango #dlsmp jimmy #dlsmp #i have been working on these designs for like over a week #it has taken so much time #im so so happy with how they look though #im gonna shake them so much

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greekandmusicals · 4 months

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How the I want song for the Sisyphus musical I'm writing completely changed

So I haven't posted about the Sisyphus musical for a while because I've been breaking down lyrics, Working on melodies and hooks and designing the shadow puppets,

(Imagine the puppets looking like this book cover)

I do want to share this one creative tidbit about how the I want song changed from one character’s song into another character's song while writing.

So originally, the title for the song that happens when Sisyphus escapes the underworld by tricking Thanatos into freeing him was “If I Play My Cards Right.”

I replaced this title with “Rise from the Ashes” which is a reference to the Phoenix myth.

Ultimately, the reason I did not want "If I play my cards right” as the I want song for Sisyphus is because, as an I want song, the scope of the concept is very small.

"If I play my cards right” depicts him as a cunning schemer with not much depth, while “Rise from the Ashes” depicts him as a cunning man who can revive himself from death and also shows Sisyphus's admiral traits of resilience that were lacking from the former song title.

I think this title lyrically fits the show because it evokes the imagery of rising a boulder, and the word ashes evokes the setting of the underworld.

I wanted to use an inspirational phrase for a tyrant like Sisyphus because he took admiral traits and used them for scheming.

The phrase Rise from the Ashes and the Sisyphus myth go hand in hand with each other to me.

But If I Play My Cards Right did come back as a song for an Oracle retitled If You Play Your Cards Right, which is the second song in the show.

The Oracle tells Sisyphus he will thrive as a king if he can play his cards right and keep peace with the gods. (Sisyphus misinterprets the message because it was delivered cryptically.)

The song has a reprise when Sisyphus is given a choice by Zeus: go to the underworld and accept his fate or roll a boulder uphill, and if he gets the boulder to the peak of the mountain, he will become immortal.

Sisyphus makes his choice in a reprise of If you play your cards right.

There’s been a debate among people about whether or not Sisyphus had a choice. I decided to go with the Verison, where he does get to decide if he can reside in the underworld or roll the boulder uphill and try to get out.

For my musical version of Sisyphus, this is a tale of a king's resilience turning into relentlessness, which leads to him having the hubris to believe he can live forever.

Zeus giving Sisyphus a choice makes the punishment far curler then simply punishing him.

Sisyphus is trapped in a state of mind for the rest of his life where he is always trying to prove he's right.

Sisyphus wonders to himself as he’s rolling the boulder uphill

If his success can never run dry

If he can reach the top,

if he can play his cards right.

I believe it was important to make Sisyphus the master of his own fate so that the punishment had more thematic weight.

The Fates might design the cards, but it's ultimately Sisyphus who has to draw them.

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bronx-bomber87 · 10 months

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Hi! just want to say really love The Rookie episode breakdown that you do.

So assuming you have watch all of them, do you have any list / ranking of best Chenford related episodes? Or can you give us your ranking of best Chenford related episodes? Really want to hear your thoughts on this. Thank you!

Hi @xiaozhen16! First off thank you for your lovely comment on my reviews. Means a lot I'm so glad you enjoy them. :) Also appreciate you wanting my thoughts on this. Let's see I have been with The Rookie since day one, actually pre-green light. I followed Nathan after Castle and his next project and saw The Rookie get its green light. So i've been with since the literal jump. Seen all eps for sure more than once haha Think I've rewatched it least 5 times since it started. Thank you for being patient while I took the time to answer this. Life is hard to fit stuff in so thank you. It'll be a long reply lol In order to answer this properly I'm going to do top 5 with an honorable mentions that could span up to 5 cause this is hard LOL Those will be in no particular order. I'll do it for each season. Except S5. I just can't choose S5 down to a top ten.

I love that entire season. But I can do 1-4. Someday I can rank S5 on its own ranking the entire season if you like but for now it'll be this. Let me know if you'd like me to do that in the comments. But for this one Each season has something different to offer for them. So it'll be easier to break it down by season but only going up to S4. Hopefully you enjoy this detailed reply. Anyone is welcome to comment and such too.

Season 1.

1x14 Plain Clothes Day

Hands down this is my favorite episode of S1 for them. It's a very telling episode for them both. Lots of growth as well. Lucy is hell bent to prove herself to Tim. She is nervous but driven to prove to Tim she is worth investing his time in. Her day is a plethora of jitters and mistakes. Tim consistently getting under her skin and rattling her cage. Then at the last minute like a phoenix rising from the ashes Lucy makes the right call. Such a clutch moment that impresses Tim more than he'll ever let on. Doesn't hesitate for one moment checking that man's garage out.

This is a huge step towards her growth as a cop and a person really. Its seminal episode for Lucy. A stepping stone to her confidence and learning to trust her instincts and not second guess herself. For Tim it's realizing as much as he loves to mess with Lucy he wants her to succeed more. He states in the very beginning of the episode how he's had 11 rookies wash out on this day. ELEVEN. He hasn't cared if his rookies have washed out 11 times. Then Lucy Chen walked into his life. Disrupted his life in the best way.

With her incredibly driven sunshine ways he REFUSES to let her be his 12th. Does everything in his ability to keep her from being fired. They have a lot of lovely moments in this episode ranging from messing with her to fiercely protecting her from that tool-bag trying to take her job. The scene outside the captain's office where he has to re-write her eval gah so very good. Overall just an amazing episode of moments and growth for them as characters and as a ship. Another step towards their rock-solid bond.

2. 1x20 Free Fall

What's not to love about this finale? It's the culmination of everything they've been through to this point in the season. We watch how Tim instantly protects Lucy from being infected. At first he's in control of the situation (or so he thinks..) Trying to keep Lucy calm while on the inside he is panicking. Attempting to keep up his tough T.O. act with her. Determined to show Lucy he's bulletproof no matter the situation. That quickly begins the devolve the longer he is in that room.

The more he has to deal with this disease alone the worse it gets. We get a front row seat into protective Lucy. The way she is losing it for Tim on the outside. Doing anything and everything to get him out of there. This is the first time we get to see Tim trust Lucy emotionally and not hesitate. Not only that but so openly. She has been knocking on the door of this all season.

The scene above is her reward for all that work. The role reversal that happens here is wonderful. Where Lucy becomes the rock. The one to comfort him while Tim is battling with his dark thoughts of suicide if this goes sideways. Trusting her enough to tell her such deep thoughts. Lucy guiding him through those emotions best she can. It's a fantastic way to end the season for them. Lots of earned moments in this one.

3. 1x11 Redwood

Our first Iconic OTP Line Episode. This is where we start to see Tim soften for Lucy. Those sharp edges dulling a bit. We get to watch how he knows exactly how to calm her when she is in a panic. Tim commands this entire episode for her. Distracting her from the moment that needle goes in to chewing out the nurse for not prioritizing her. It was our first glimpse into protective Tim and I was here for it. Excellent introduction to this side of him regarding Lucy. Does the Tim Bradford special where he tells her like it is while showing empathy.

The first time we get to see him care truly care and let her know that he's there. Has her back in a way no one really has before. Lucy is watching her career go down the drain in her eyes. Changing her life forever and is in panic city. Tim doesn't let her be a resident there for very long. This ep showcases how amazing he is at his job and how good Tim is with Lucy. Knows exactly what to do in order to keep her sane.

He spends his entire day distracting her and showing empathy in the process. Ultimately stopping her from going off the razor's edge. It's these moments she has with Tim that shift her POV of him. Why she fights for him like she does. Lucy knows the good heart this man has. That he cares about her as person. That she is more than just his rookie. It's so very good. Producing the line above. *sigh*

4. 1x07 The Ride Along

These early episode are what I like to call building block eps. The foundation that is laid in these are so important. It's Lucy showing up for Tim when he needs it most. Their relationship is in its infancy in these episodes. Being molded into what we see in the finale and honestly the future. Lucy noticing a serious wrong (Isabel taking advantage of Tim's deep loyalty) Not only noticing but not letting him throw his life/career away for it. The line above is EVERYTHING. She refuses to let Tim cross an ocean and compromise his soul for someone who wouldn't cross a puddle for him. The bravery it took for her take a stand I'll always commend her for. How scary it must've been for her to confront him like this. When he was still in his radioactive insanely damaged phase. Tim already meant more to her at this point than she expected. She couldn't stand back and watch him self-destruct for someone who didn't deserve it. Tim is not even close to being used to someone showing up for him like this at this point. It's so very foreign to him.

Not only that but someone putting him in place and knocking sense back into him. Something he comes to learn and love about Lucy. Becomes the fabric of their dynamic really. In the moment he's so angry with her but long term forever grateful she stepped in like she did. That crack in his wall starting to grow a little more. A defining moment for them early on in this season. They had me hook line and sinker after this. I was already low-key shipping them but this added to it.

5. 1x03 The Good The Bad and the Ugly

Another building block episode. A crucial one for them really. I love how their early episodes set them up beautifully for the rest of the season. If not for these episodes you wouldn't see how wonderful the growth is for them both. The episodes that'll be in my honorable mentions are the fruit of these. Because without seeing where they came from how could we deeply appreciate how far they've come? Tim is imploding at a high velocity in this episode. Doesn't care about the collateral damage either. At this point that damage radius includes Lucy.

We truly see Tim as his very worst in the beginning. The beautiful thing is Lucy see's past his hurt into who he is as a person. He is worth getting through to. Also she also see's he is a god damn dumpster fire. One that if she doesn't put him out he's going to take her down with him. You know Tim respects the hell out of her for the scene above. (Not in the moment but in the long term of it all.)

For standing up to him and showing him how selfish he was being. It's what earns her that wonderful scene in the shop afterwards. Where he opens up and tells her about Isabel and a little bit of their history. His way of thanking her for getting his head on straight. Their early stuff is so raw but so good. They're learning how to function together. Usually one of them leading the other more depending on the situation. Start of their wonderful dynamic.

~~~

Honorable mentions-Ones I wanted to include cause they're amazing but can only gif the top 5 and one mention ha So it'll be my top ten for each season. They have so many good eps.

1x18 Home Front

So much to love about this one. Lucy busting his chops the entire ep. Get our first glimpse into their playful work flirts. Her challenging him on his personal life and not work for the first time. Standing her ground in that opinion. Like she does best with him. Telling Tim he needs something other than work. Naturally is defensive at first and eventually caves in. It results in the cute paintball moment above we all know and love.

1x19-Checklist-We get another glimpse into what Tim is willing to do to keep Lucy from washing out. I love this episode and how we start to see Tim trust in her decision making skills. Like the woman with the swapped plates. She lets her go and it ends up working out for her. The final scene is the best where he logs OT for her to continue on in the program. Lucy feeling so supported with this gesture. *heart clutch* So good.

1x16 Green light- Our first look into how protective Lucy can be about Tim. Their rank be damned in her opinion. The way she protects and defends him to Detective Murphy is glorious. Not caring she's her superior officer. She is kicking him when he is already down and Lucy won't stand for it. Then Tim returns the favor when she's upset about catching Cole. ‘Grief is grief. It’s a hole that can’t be filled. But over time, it’ll shrink enough so that you won’t fall in every time you take a step.’ His growth in this line is amazing to watch unfold. How he has grown since his whole debacle with Isabel.

1x15-Man Hunt.- We see some more fruit of Lucy's impact on Tim. Him wanting to do more with his career. He decides to go for Sergeant and we all know she is part of that reason. Also we get a glimpse into Tim and his rookie days through Deacon and his 54 connection. Lucy is delighted to get a birds eye view to his past. It's the scene where they're defending the escaped prisoner that's the best. Saying how he refuses to do something he will be ashamed in the light of day. This moment being proof Lucy's impact on him from 1x07. Its beautifully full circle.

1x01 Pilot-Gotta include the pilot. It's what set the table for them. "Officer Bradford gets our hot shot." He sure does. Getting a look into them as characters and where they start off from. It's what hooked me to this show to begin with. Other than just my love for Eric and Nathan at the time lol I saw deep characters with so much potential and I've been hooked ever since.

~~~

Season 2. Has an unreal amount of good eps for them did my best to keep it to ten.

2x11 Day of Death

Naturally this iconic episode is my favorite of S2. How could it not be? This is a massively seminal moment in their history. It's where they go from border-line friends to bonded in a way no one else will ever understand. We watch Lucy fight tooth and nail to stay alive. She is so resilient because she knows Tim is on his way. He won't let her die. Won't Let Caleb win. Her immense amount of faith is beautiful. Knowing that he will get to her in time. Not a doubt in her mind.

We watch Tim race against the clock to rescue her. The pressure and anxiety mounting through out the entire episode for him. Like a weight on his soul he refuses to put down until she is back. We get to witness how much Tim has come to care about Lucy. See the depth's he will go to get her back safely. Also get to see a darker side to him. Which I wasn't totally opposed to seeing in order to get to her. (and wouldn't mind seeing again. tbh) 'Today is your day of reckoning. I am responsible for a life that is in jeopardy, and I will do whatever I have to, to save her.' *fans self* That man is on edge from the moment she goes missing till she is in his arms above.

First actual relaxing breath he takes the entire ep. You see how his body slumps against her in relief as he holds her. How deeply worried he was and won't let her out of his sight afterwards. We all know that man slept at the hospital all night and didn't take his eyes off her until she woke up. To make sure he was the first face she saw. That final scene in the hospital a beautiful look into the deep bond they've formed at this point. I love them sfm. Where we get our next Iconic OTP Line. 'You know me so well. Too Well.' Amongst a flurry of heart eyes and emotions.

2. 2x12 Now and Then

What I love the most about this episode is how Tim steps back. Let's her get taken care of by someone other than himself. Control Freak Tim Bradford hands the reins over. Because her recovering is more important than his ego. The growth I can not. He see's a blind spot within himself that he can not help out with. So he heeds Nyla's words when she approaches him about taking her on. He watches anxiously from afar wanting not to over step the entire episode.

Lucy is hurt he doesn't let her ride with him right away. She is confused and her emotions are all over the place in this episode. Rightfully so. We get to see once again how much Tim cares about her. The way he's asking everyone around her how she is. Even asks Nolan how she is really doing. You know that was hard for him to do. We get to the end of the episode and this glorious scene above. Tim sharing a piece of his past to heal her present.

You can tell he so desperately wants to take on some of her pain. That if he could he would. Still shouldering the weight of her being taken being on him. Trying to give her some hard won perspective. This is his way of saying he's so proud of her, he misses her, hoping him sharing his past brings her back to him. Brings Lucy back to being his sunshine human. Not the angry resentful one he see's in front of him. It's a beautiful scene for the both of them. The sweet smiles when he tosses back the ring. My damn heart.

3. 2x13 Follow Up Day

Another Iconic moment in S2. This season is full of them. Ground breaking moments that drive them forward as a ship. He's passed his Sergeants exam. Hooray. Lucy is SO DAMN PROUD when they get the news. It's the thing he's been working toward since the beginning of S2. He's offered a Hollywood post. One that he can have quickly. A prominent position for him right out the gate and yet he hesitates. Why you ask? Well he's a little too attached to his current rookie that he pretends he isn't attached to. (While dating her best friend might I add. Something I would forget regularly in this season)

Lucy reminds him why he wants to stay around and not leave yet. She challenges him, supports him and believes in Tim in a way he's never had before. Has unwavering faith in him. He says he's not done training her yet. When really he's not ready to let go of the influence she's had on his life. Heart eyes galore. She is more important than moving up atm. I love it.

4. 2x02 The Night General

The beginning of Tim's quest to study for being a Sergeant. It starts off as Tim torturing Lucy with reading his out of print book to him. What starts out as him enjoying making her read it turns into so much more. Lucy quickly turns it around on him. Because well Lucy. Decides on specific segments to have him recite back. Quickly annoying him and he loses this game fairly quickly. It's during this studying we find out Tim learns a certain way. That he must be in motion to absorb the material. (Me too love) He doesn't take this news in stride very well because it's Tim.

Lucy goes above and beyond to apologize for upsetting him. She spends what I assume is any free time between shifts recording the book for him. Not only does she do this she reassures him that it's ok to learn this way. There is no shame in it even compliments him because of it. Telling him its why he excels at being a cop. I

I just adore this moment so much because she builds him up and encourages him. Never once letting him feel shame for how he learns. Lucy taking care of him in ways Tim can't even comprehend atm. He is overwhelmed by her support and empathy. Can only muster a really loaded 'Thanks.' Such a lovely building block for them. Also welcome to the sweaty gun show above *fans self*

5. 2x08 Clean Cut

Ahh the protective Lucy episode. We get to see how far Tim will go for Lucy in this season. The audience also gets to see how far Lucy is willing to go to protect and defend Tim. Just like in 1x16 she charges head long at a superior to defend Tim. Refusing to let anyone sully his name or character. From the moment their shop hits that woman's car she goes into 'Protect Tim mode.' at all costs.

Hell raining down on anyone who gets in the way of her clearing his name. Eating anyone trying to stop her from righting this wrong she KNOWS is a wrong against him. Tim is so defeated and resigned after it happens. He's not going to defend himself so Lucy takes it on herself to do this. The ferocity is noticed by Tim. Why he lets her lead the questioning against the shady BF.

Lucy breathes life back into him that they could overturn this. That unshakeable faith she has in him. Refusing to let him give up on himself. It's the way she builds him up and won't let him think any less of himself I adore so much. After it's reversed and he gets his award she's a proud wifey. Even throwing back his own words at him when he thanks her. Eyes full of love. It's fantastic full circle moment for them.

~~~

Honorable Mentions

2x19-Q Word

As I've said earlier S2 is chock full of goodies. Tim learning the place he still holds in Lucy's life. He is her GO TO. A place he thought he had lost in 2x11. He gave up having that spot in her life because he no longer felt worthy of it. That he was given his shot and he blew it. Lucy not for one damn second thought he forfeited that. She was more upset he wasn't engaging with her about this than anything else.

Lucy does her best to relieve him of his burden. Of the guilt he continues to feel. To let him know it was NOT his fault. That his opinion is one of most value to her. The very opposite of what Tim thought of his place in her world. It's a good episode. One of the best parts above. Lucy applying some salve to his guilty soul.

2x06 Fallout

Lots to love in this ep. Tim trying and failing at 'being nice' to Lucy while she goes through her emotions about her ex. To him tapping into his actual soft side for her. The genuine side. Them facing a bomb threat and Lucy getting to unleash all her anger about her ex's wedding Such a good scene.. With a little of Lucy throwing his words back like no one else can. Lastly ending with them deciding to spend their last moments on earth together drinking booze. Damn good ep.

2x10-The Dark Side

Ahhh the pre-DOD episode. Where Tim spends the entire episode being over protective of Lucy and not sure why he is. All he knows is he doesn't like this guy sniffing around her. His cop gut screaming at him with a mixture of jealously and actual worry. The whole episode is one giant foreshadowing for the following episode.

2x14 Casualties

Tim background eps are always my jam. I LOVE LOVE LOVE this man and learning of his history. Getting a little look into his life in the service with Mitch. Also the intro of their fur-baby Kojo and how very unready Lucy is to care for him. We get our next Iconic OTP line 'Some things matter more.' A moment which is such a prominent scene for them. Good precursor to the moment they share in 2x19 as well.

2x01 impact

The premiere got some real good stuff. We see how Tim reacts so very poorly to Lucy protecting him. Regressing them both with his flour bomb moment. HIs anger coming out in everything he does with her in this episode. Lucy taking it at first then reaches her boiling point towards the end. Basically hands him his ass in a way only Lucy Chen can. It's glorious. Turns him around so much he brags on her to Grey later on about her jump after a suspect. 'Of course she did. I trained her.'

~~~

Season 3

3x09 Amber

Ahh my fav ep of the season. This episode has so many good moments. Lucy with her list for a 'healthy parting.' How she is determined to make her last day a big deal with Tim. Where as Tim is also determined, just in the opposite direction. Because if he talks about it he's going to have to face her leaving. Which we all know he does not want to do. Fights her on it most of the episode. Until something serious happens. Then Tim finally gives in to distract Lucy from the stressful baby scenario they're currently in.

Takes care of her by letting her do the bloody list he's trying to avoid. They have a lovely moment of reminiscing over Plain Clothes Day. How far Lucy has come since that moment. The amount of confidence she had gained. Learning to trust her instincts fully. Something Tim saw in her day one and wanted her to hone in on. Lucy then brings up UC and Tim saying she doesn't have what it takes. it leads into the most iconic moment of the episode. Where she "pretends" to have feelings for Tim.

Sending Tim into an ABSOLUTE panic till she can't take it anymore and breaks into pure laughter. Wounding his pride severely in the process of proving her point. We get two epic moments in this episode. The parking garage scene is lovely. A culmination of the last year of so. How far they've both come. His last eval being one that brings them full circle. Lucy's flour bomb finishing off the nostalgia. The heart eyes galore in this scene and its topped off with them calling each other by their first names. Starting a new chapter with this wonderful moment.

2. 3x14 Threshold

I LOVE this episode so much. It's why it's number 2. This episode is the culmination of Lucy's fast track UC training with Harper. Lucy chomping at the bit to prove herself. A VERY anxious Tim observing from the outside. The flirty flirt we get in the car makes me squee every time. Little bit of Tim and Lucy truly coming out in that moment. The touching is everything as she communicates silently with him about what's going on.

Then we get this moment above. Where they are blatantly flirting and checking each other out. Especially Tim. Man could not be more transparent in his attraction to Lucy at this point. The elevator gaze before they even talk. *fans self* Shameless flirting, praise from Tim and to top it off Tim is the one to ask Lucy to save him a dance. I remember going out of my mind with excitement when I saw this episode. Look at them above. My god the UST in immense and I love it so very much.

3. 3x06 Revelations

The episode where Lucy begins her interest in UC. It's a ROUGH episode for Tim for a lot of reasons. From his PTSD about Isabel with Mack showing up to seeing Lucy put in harms way. We see the protective side come out fiercely in this one. He doesn't even try to tamp it down. Especially in front of others. i.e. the entire OP room LOL Tim battling past demons and losing terribly. Seeing his favorite human put at risk isn't sitting well with him. His panic at losing her or possibly getting hurt making him lose his mind.

Lucy just wanting him to be proud of her. For showing an interest outside of patrol. To be excited she got put on an OP because she kicked ass on the fly. Impressed Harper enough to green light her. His approval and opinion meaning the entire world to her. When he doesn't she is so very discouraged. That's what makes the moment above so important and amazing. Tim putting aside those demons and letting her have that approval and praise she earned ten times over. Because at the end of the day this OP was about her and not him. So he puts her first with the lovely moment above.

4. 3x11 New Blood

Where we see Lucy be utterly CONSUMED by jealously and insecurities. Tim gets his new rookie and Lucy is excited at first. Then see's Tim isn't treating her anywhere near how she was treated in the beginning. He's being nice, letting her drive, buying her coffee, being soft and empathetic. All things she had to drag out of him kicking and screaming. I've said this before but Tim was her first real 'puppy' with massive success. It was a lot of work though for her to have the relationship she has with him now.

Then this Katie Barnes comes in and gets it all in one shift. Lucy is losing her damn mind most of the ep. Watching from afar with massive jealously. Poor Jackson has to listen to it most of his shift LOL Comes with the bestie territory though. By the end of the episode she see's Tim filling out her paperwork and lets Tim have it. What I love is he doesn't get mad at her for it.

Doesn't reprimand her just quell's her insecurities. Explaining why he was training Barnes the way he was. Then seals the scene with the lovely line above. Lucy is absolutely beaming when he walks away. Full of so much joy and happiness she can't contain herself. He thinks she is one of the best rookie's he's trained and lets her know it. Saying maybe one day Katie could be as good as her. *sigh* So good.

5. 3x01 Consequences

Their first marriage episode of the season. Where Lucy is on Tim like white on rice. Her confidence and self esteem shines through out this season and this is the starter episode of it all. The way they go through Nolan's house together is fantastic. She challenges Tim the entire time with her own cop gut. It's so fun to watch the back and forth.

They go from cute banter to Tim being a fierce protector when they have to go see Rosalind. Tim tries to prevent her from going in. Wanting to shield her from this monster. Lucy refuses says she can handle it. Rosalind just see's someone she can play with. Tim attempts to hold back. Not interfere and tries to keep Lucy steady. Then loses it when she taunts Lucy with her barrel song. The official title of 'Fierce protector.' is born in this moment. Such a good episode for them beginning to end.

~~~

Honorable Mentions

3x02 In-Justice

I adore this ep because it is one giant flirting session. The scene above alone is proof of that. Tim just sitting back and enjoying the Lucy show. Setting up a game he knows she is going to absolutely crush. (and does) They're legit flirting in front of their call for like two minutes before they disengage and Lucy works her magic. Also we get to see how soft Tim is for Lucy and gone for her with her car. Telling her to get over until Caleb PTSD in brought into the picture. It's then he caves instantly. Also the introduction of their pseudo daughter Tamara. Lucy's 'puppy.'

3x04-Sabotage

The fruit of the last couple eps coming to fruition. Lucy having Tim revisit something he did on her first shift. Confronting him about how he treated those gardeners. Not only that but the impact he had on them through his actions. This brings Tim's defenses immediately up and he snaps at her. Trying to defend his actions because he is feeling defensive. He does a poor job of it and shuts down completely. Reason being he's ashamed of who he was then and Lucy bringing it up hurts in a way he wasn't expecting.

We get to see our boy go through some serious growth. MASSIVE growth really. I could not be prouder of him for it. For not shutting down for the rest of the day. Letting Lucy know he was wrong and what he can do so it never happens again. Love this ep for the Tim growth, Lucy calling him out and letting him know how proud she is of him. It's such a good moment/ep for them.

3x07 True Crime

I personally LOVE the documentary episodes so much. The reason being their banter is the best part. Their chemistry is on full display for all to see. Lucy owns Tim's ass in this one. Shoots down all his cocky comments. He is also all heart eyes whenever she isn't crushing him with her words ahha. Light hearted fun ep for them.

3x08 Bad Blood

Good ep for Tim telling her like it is when he's trying to avoid it like the plague haha Emmett breaking up with her over text. Lucy doesn't handle it well. She self destructs till Tim does what he does best and gives her some solid perspective. Helping her finally solve the 'Why' behind her break up.

3x05 Lockdown

Tim and Lucy being a united front against Doug is the absolute best. How Tim comes tearing into the station after Stanton and Lucy has to stop him. Then Stanton is an extra ass and Tim then has to prevent Lucy from hurting him. The way they have each other's backs always gets to me. They spend the entire episode this kick ass duo determined to protect Jackson. I love it sfm.

~~~~

Season 4 another super hard one for me but top ten helped.

4x09 Breakdown

I'm sure some of you thought I would choose 4x22. It follows this one pretty closely but I ADORE this episode. It's my favorite for so many reasons. Lucy has a day off and how does she spend it? With Tim and his sister redoing his childhood home. Totally normal 'Friend' status there. Nothing soulmate level about that at all....Then they spend the episode chasing down his father's sordid past. This is due to a gun they find in the wall. Not only that but how heavily Tim leans on Lucy during the process.

Let's her take the lead and trusts her to handle portions of it for him. Like interrogating his dad's former mistress. Then we get this GLORIOUS scene above. Hands down my favorite hug of their's. Tim confronting his father and walking out feeling nuclear in his emotions. He is radioactive from that interaction and so very hurt. He explains what his father did to Lucy. He's so disgusted and hurt.

Then he is NEEDING Lucy to know he isn't his father. That the Tim tests don't make him like his dad. He is on the verge of tears as he says this to her. The most vulnerable we have ever seen Tim in general but especially with her. Lucy jumping into action and gathering him up in her arms. Comforting him, letting him know he is NOTHING like him. Tim sinks into the hug. Wraps himself entirely around her. Letting her hold him up emotionally. It's here we see the last of his wall crumble to the ground never to be rebuilt again. This was the ep I knew we were headed towards them getting together. All time fav ep.

2. 4x22 Day in The Hole

So much to love in this episode. From their daughter getting her ‘first’ car to finding Tim's bizzaro world double 'Dim' LOL Also the introduction of Juicy aha It's so good I can not. Lucy getting beyond excited to get Tim all dressed up for his UC mission. Especially with the tattoo's. Then when Juicy gets involved so does Lucy. It's AU Tim and Lucy and I was dying. Lucy breaks his brain in more ways than one above. The way she stuns him with her UC background for their characters LMAO He stumbles on his words and shifts like his pants are getting little tight for him heh. They haven't even kissed yet.

It will forever crack me up his reaction. Also the hilarious lead up to the kiss. How nervous and awkward they are. 'Well that's romantic....I wasn't trying to be romantic.' LMFAO. Clearly Timothy.... Eric and Melissa's chemistry on full display in this moment. Then the way Lucy just grabs his face and the kiss above happens. How they instantly melt into each other. Like why haven't we been doing this the entire time? You can see Tim ready to seriously deepen the kiss above. The pre-tongue action going on. Hot damn. I remember having to rewind it making sure what I was seeing was real.

The hilarity that ensures when Tamara walks in is so so funny. Never not cackle at this. Lucy's 'Oh!' and Tim is stumbling over himself to get out of there. Makes me laugh just writing it. The awkward 'Good jobs' and pointing. I'm dying. Tim's epiphany in the hallway is the best. Can no longer run from how he feels anymore. That kiss unlocking why he's felt the way he does. The awkward way they interact at the station. Both hiding in their vehicles waiting to find the courage to come out. Gah such a good finale leading to an incredible season 5.

3. 4x12 The Knock

Another episode on the road to them ending up together. They are at soulmate level territory in the scene above alone. The entire episode is fantastic. 'Personal space I don't know her' is the theme of this episode for them. From this 'date' to their case. Where Tim lets her take the lead. They're right on top of each other in that hallway scene when Tim is asking her POV on what they should do.

The beach date is one of the best parts. I don't know how both Ashley and Chris didn't just get up and leave. It's so obvious Tim and Lucy are the ones on a date. Chris and Ashley just happen to be there. The way they flirt the entire time, the inside jokes, the way they know each other so deeply. Their intimate connection on full display.

It's the lack of space I adore so much. That magnetic pull of their's. Never be over Gerald the goat. The way they lovingly stare at each other after he's told the story. The only ones laughing are them. To think either of them (Chris and Ashley) actually thought they had a chance against their bond. Such fools. I would've been highly threatened after that display. Something so intimate about knowing someone on an emotional level like they do. Height of their soulmate moments in this one.

4. 4x18-Backstabbers

Gah this episode be still my damn shipper heart. Lucy getting annoyed she isn't getting any recognition as Tim's aide. Naturally at first Tim pushes against it. Gives her crap for asking for it. Little bit of Old school Tim coming out in this scenario. But we see by the end of the episode him cracking for her. Like he always does. Tim cashing in on the dance he owed her from 3x14. How these two don't know they're in love at this point I couldn't tell you. Blows my damn mind.

The fact that he gives up recognition for her to have it. To further her career and telling her he wants her to be successful? Gah not to mention the heart eyes in this moment. Lucy is beaming brightly like a Christmas tree at this gesture. Tim is so so gone for her by this point it's oozing out of him. If you watched these two above with no context you'd think they were together. Everything about them says how in love they are. The entire scene is one giant I love you/in love with you moment. Tim I don't do weddings Bradford tearing up the dance floor with his girl. Gah I can not.

5. 4x01-Life and Death

The premiere is so very very good. Tim offering her a safe space the moment they get some time alone. Especially after hearing how heartbroken she is. How she can't go back to her apt without Jackson right now. The way he gives her a safe place to crash land into. I love it sfm. Then we get the gloriously intimate and beautiful hug above. The one that sparks the flame between them. One they've been trying to keep at a low flame roaring into an inferno. Their emotions and closeness ramping it up to a level neither is ready for.

The chemistry in this moment is out of this world good. Both being smacked in the face with the growing UST between them. Lucy going for it but it being shot down by Wesley's call. Gah such a good way to start an amazing season. Then Lucy spends the rest of the episode worrying about him from the other side of the world. Letting him know that worry until he makes it back. Such a good premiere.

Honorable Mentions

4x07 Fire Fight

This scene alone is why it's my first honorable mention. Phew lord. The fiery UST in this scene. HOT DAMN. The brazen way they're both looking at each other. This is totally platonic friendship right here....The intense gaze gets me in my shipper feels. Then Tim gets his wits about him a bit before sassing her. Telling her the mic is too high. Her ripping it right off and his face LOL They're so married it kills me. I do love the way she bosses him around in this scene and afterwards when he's in the car. She's projecting jealously entire time.

4x06 Poetic Justice

Oh you know just another episode where all they do is compete and flirt. Not caring about anyone else around them while they do so. Because they can't handle their emotions yet. So they intensely channel it into flirting and competitive things instead. I love these idiots so much.

4x08 -Hit and Run

I LOVE this episode for the Tim background alone. We get the introduction of his sister Genny. Who I love sfm. Lucy of course eats up her being there. She THRIVES on any morsel of info she can get on his background. Lucy is enjoying herself till his dark childhood is brought up. His sister is there to sell their childhood home and he doesn't want to be apart of it. ""Wha-what do you want? Some other family to just cuddle up under the broken plaster where dad slammed my head against the wall?" Ugh my heart. My boy. But it's such a good episode in full for Tim. Also for Lucy getting to meet his sister.

4x14-The Long Shot

This is a great episode for Lucy. We get to see more about her background as well. Finally finding out why her mother is the way she is with her. Her deep digging revealing her father isn't her real father. How much she struggles in this episode emotionally. We get to see how natural it is for Tim to be there for her. Not an ounce of fight left in him to stay out of her personal life. This is just part of who they are now and it's such growth I can not stand it.

4x16-Real Crime

Another gem for the documentary series. If you think they were married in this last one they double down on this one. The amount of cuteness, sass and marriage moments is primo in this one. 'Can I be interviewed alone?' LMAO The epitome of Grumpy x Sunshine. Lucy having the time of her life while Tim is a grumpsaurous. Their dynamic gives me life haha I adore this entire episode for them.

S5 I adore all it's own. If you want a ranking from 1-22 I can do that but I can not choose. Hurts me too much to do that LOL but here are my picks for 1-4. Once again thank you for being so patient on my reply. This was a hefty ask to answer thank you for asking me :) I hope you enjoy the answer.

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