#and i will pass this class. and i even ate two meals in between.

[godsperfectprincess]

i've been really really good at homework today i need someone to be proud of me because i'm doing it really good

[gainercontent]

Eli's Thanksgiving Feast

Eli had been dreading this moment for weeks. After three months of dining hall food, late-night pizza, and chugging beers, he knew the consequences of college life were starting to show. The freshman 15. Everyone talked about it, but no one really prepared him for how quickly it could sneak up on you.

When he pulled in the driveway and saw his two older brothers tossing a frisbee in the front yard of their house, he could already see the smirks on their faces.

"Damn, Eli, you look like you’ve been hitting the dining hall more than the library," his brother Noah said, giving him a teasing once-over.

"Seriously, can't even hide it now," Micah, the middle brother, added, a laugh bubbling in his voice. He reached out to give Eli a pat on the back, but the gesture turned into a playful poke in the stomach. "You sure you're still fit to play ultimate, or are you just here for the Thanksgiving stuffing now?"

Eli tried to laugh it off, but deep down, he felt the heat rise in his cheeks. He had always been the skinny one growing up, the one who could eat whatever he wanted without worrying about his weight. But college had thrown him off balance—dorm food, late-night study sessions, and the absence of his mom’s homemade cooking. It didn’t take long before he found himself snacking on pizza rolls at 2 a.m. or grabbing a double cheeseburger between classes. And now, it showed.

"You guys are ridiculous," Eli muttered, trying to change the subject. "It’s just a few pounds."

"No kidding. It's not like you can just wish it away, bro," Noah teased.

"Don’t worry, we’ll help get you back in shape… after dinner," Micah added with a smirk.

Later, at the dinner table, the teasing reached new heights. Their mom had outdone herself this year, as usual. The kitchen was filled with the familiar smell of roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, Mac and cheese, cranberry sauce, and—of course—her famous stuffing. It was the kind of meal that made Eli’s mouth water just from the smell.

"Sit down, Eli," his mom called, placing a massive plate of food in front of him. "I know you’re starving after your long drive."

"I’m not that hungry, Mom," Eli protested, eyeing the mountain of food in front of him.

"No, no," Noah chimed in, grinning. "You’ve gotta eat it all, Eli. You need the fuel. We don’t want you looking like you’re gonna float away after dinner."

Eli shot him a glare but sat down, his stomach already rumbling at the sight of all that food. Micah was already halfway through his first plate, shoveling mashed potatoes into his mouth with reckless abandon.

"Come on, little brother," Micah teased. "You’re not gonna let me beat you, are you?"

Eli rolled his eyes. "I’m not racing you guys."

But as the meal went on, Noah and Micah’s constant badgering wore him down.

"No way you can eat all that," Noah challenged, smirking at Eli. "Come on, show us what you've got."

"Yeah, we dare you," Micah added. "Five plates. You know you want to."

With each bite, Eli found himself getting fuller and fuller. But the challenge was too tempting to ignore. He loaded up his plate with mashed potatoes, a giant scoop of stuffing, turkey, green beans, and a spoonful of cranberry sauce. His brothers cheered him on, making exaggerated comments as he shoveled it all in, their voices getting louder the more he ate.

By the time he finished his first plate, the edges of his stomach were beginning to protest. He was full, but his brothers egged him on, urging him to keep going.

"Come on, one more plate. You can do it!" Micah shouted.

Noah chimed in. "You know the rule—no one's allowed to leave the table until they’ve finished five plates."

The competitive fire in Eli flared. He couldn’t back down. Not now. So, he loaded up a second plate, then a third. He felt the strain in his stomach with each passing bite, the tightness in his waistband beginning to feel like a constant reminder of how much he was stuffing in. But his brothers kept making comments, kept laughing, and it pushed him forward. He kept eating.

By the time he reached plate number five, Eli felt like his body was about to give up. His stomach felt like a bloated balloon, full and aching. The tightness of his jeans was becoming unbearable, and he let out an involuntary, loud burp that echoed through the room.

"Uh-oh, bro," Noah said with a grin. "Sounds like someone’s gonna pop."

Eli’s face flushed crimson, and his hand instinctively went to his waistband. He couldn’t take it anymore. He unbuttoned his jeans, letting out another long, audible burp as he tried to ease the pressure.

Micah leaned back in his chair, his grin practically splitting his face. "Dude, you seriously ate five plates. I’m impressed, but you might need a stretcher to get off that chair."

Eli laughed weakly, clutching his stomach. "I think I might just sleep here," he groaned. "Can’t move."

"Ah, don’t be a wimp," Noah said. "There’s still dessert."

Eli’s eyes widened. Dessert. He had completely forgotten. His mom had already brought out a spread of pies—pumpkin, apple, pecan, and chocolate cream.

"You guys are insane," Eli muttered, but when Noah placed a huge slice of pumpkin pie in front of him, he couldn’t say no. His stomach might have been on the brink of revolt, but dessert was a whole other beast.

The rest of the meal passed in a haze of discomfort. Eli could barely look at the food in front of him, but he forced down a few bites of pie. By the time dessert was over, he felt completely stuffed. His pants were barely holding on, and each breath felt like a labor.

Eli slumped in his chair, a hand pressed firmly against his bloated stomach. He had lost the battle—not only had he eaten way too much, but he’d also been completely outdone by his brothers’ teasing.

But despite the discomfort, there was something oddly satisfying about the whole experience. Sure, he was stuffed to the point of misery, but he had done it. He had survived five plates, countless teasing remarks, and endless jokes.

As the night wound down, his brothers gave him one last, affectionate jab.

"You’re gonna need a week to recover from that," Micah said, ruffling Eli’s hair.

"Probably a month," Noah added with a chuckle.

Eli just smiled weakly and groaned. "I think I’ll just sleep until Christmas."

And, for the first time in a long while, that didn’t seem like such a bad idea.

[unholybacon355]

Kinktober Day 28 - GP! Winter x Im Nayeon

Kinktober Masterlist

A/N: Yes, I'm waaaaayyy behind my schedule for Kinktober (Like a week behind) but istg i gonna post the all 31 works.

Also I know I said no more than two stories per idol, but things happened this days and I just had to write this. So that's why nayeon is here again.

And also I apologize if this feels a bit rushed, but is the best I can get this days. With all that being said, I let you with this nonsense.

Minjeong never thought that she would need to be on her knees in order to approve this class. She came to Professor Nayeon's office to ask, or beg if necessary, for a chance to earn some extra points to increase her grade and pass her class. Minjeong was thinking of something like extra homework, a special test, maybe even doing Professor’s laundry, but nothing remotely close to being on her knees with her face buried between Nayeon’s thighs.

Nayeon was sitting on her chair with her skirt lifted to her waist, no underwear, and one leg over her desk to give Minjeong more room to work. Minjeong for her part was on her knees, caressing Nayeon’s thighs, and with her tongue as deep as she could inside her professor’s pussy.

At this time of the day almost no one left on this side of the building, but nayeon still has one hand covering her mouth and the other playing with her student's hair. Despite the low chances to be discovered, never is good having moans coming out of a professor's office. 

Minjeong obviously was doing a good job, otherwyse her face wouldn't be covered on her professor’s slick. To be honest she isn’t that good at giving head but the adrenaline of eating a professor's pussy and also saving her class in the process, is giving her all the enthusiasm she needs to eat that pussy as if it were the last meal on earth. And her effort seems to have a good result because Nayeon uses the hand that was playing with Minjeon’s hair to maintain her head in place while she orgasm and cum in Minjeong face. 

The girl has to admit that her professor’s pussy tastes so good, one of the best she's ever had. Maybe she needs to ask for assistance more often, because if this is the way to pay she has no problem with that.

“Good girl.” Nayeon was panting but still was able to speak. “ But if you had put the same amount of effort into your classes as you did into eating my pussy then you wouldn't have needed it.” Minjeong opened her mouth to protest but Nayeon cut her words. “No, no.” She said moving her index finger from side to side in a negative gesture. “We Aren't finished yet.”

“But I ate you, and made you come.”

“I say we aren’t finished yet. Get your pants down, now.” Nayeon was a good professor and never acted this bossy during class, but people know that it is better not to mess with her. She can be peaceful most of the time, but if you get her mad then you're finished. Better just get back home and take that class next semester but with another professor. Luckily for Minjeong that wasn’t her case, she always paid attention in classes and had decent grades , but shits happens and now she is here. “Don’t make me repeat it.” Nayeon's gaze was stern.

Minjeong was kinda concerned but still obeyed her teacher, but since she only mentioned her pants she only pulled off that garment. Despiste that she ate her professor’s pussy just minutes ago, this makes her feel vulnerable. Her cute white panties were on display and did almost nothing to hide her erection.

“Oh don’t tease me.” Nayeon herself pulled Minjeong’s panties down revealing her small and semi erected dick. “Much better. Now turn around.”  Nayeon gave her one of those looks that told her that was a bad idea to protest or not obey, so Minjeong turned around really confused because initially she thought Nayeon was gonna suck her dick, or at least touch it. But apparently her teacher has another plan for her. “Now bend over my desk.”

This time Minjeong didn't need to hear it twice to obey. She put her elbows on the wooden surface as she bent over the said desk. “No, no, not like that. Spread that ass for me.” This earned Nayeon a confused look from Minjeong. “Did you thought I was to touch your little weeny?” A loud laugh came from the teacher. “Come on, my hand is bigger than your dick. If you want me to touch you then earn it.”

Not waiting for Minjeong to actually do something, Nayeon espread her butthocks revealing her small wrinkle entrance. “Wha.. what…” But Minjeong’s words were cut when she felt Nayeon’s tongue doing things to her anus. Teacher's tongue was doing circles over Minjeong’s sensitive anus  showing a lot of expertise, she definitely has experience doing this.

Minjeong wants to protest but the tongue on her ass is doing things to her strength and she can't resist, so she tries to stick her ass out to help her teacher to have more access to her dirty back entrance. And Nayeon takes advantage of that by sticking her tongue inside Minjeong, pushing and opening her ass with her wet and warm muscle. 

Minjeong, far from protest, is a whimpering mess. Having a tongue inside her ass and her butthock being held by Nayeon’s big hands make her hard. Her dick is throbbing against the desk and her balls are arching.  Is so pathetic that she’s close to cum just by her teacher eating her ass.

But suddenly Minjeong's ass feels empty. She wants to protest, she wants Nayeon tongue inside her again, but instead she gets something more.

God knows from where Nayeon takes a lotion bottle and pours some lotion on her hand, then her hands lands again on Minjeong’s ass. But this time instead of spreading her cheeks she massaged her anus. That little entrance is already so stimulated that nayeon easily slid a finger inside Minjeong. The girl is kinda hypnotized by her teacher actions because she don’t even think about to protest, even when she normally don’t get her ass fucked. The power nayeon has over her is so that Minjeon is now spreading her own butthocks to help her teacher. Maybe that gives her some more points.

“You’re hard but my hand is still bigger.” Nayeon laughs in her ear, finally touching Minjeong dick, and what she says is true. Girl’s dick is as hard as it can be but Nayeon's hand is easily covering it with balls included. In some way that makes Minjeong arousal go to the sky.

Another finger goes inside Minjeong anus. She already feel filled but Nayeon thing is time to really fuck her ass, so she start moving her fingers. Now both Nayeon’s hands are pleasuring Minjeong, one inside her ass and the other stroking her dick. Or most like grabbing and twitching her shaft while making fun of her size.

“You take my fingers so well. What a good girl you’re.” The mix between the compliment and the jokes about her size were really doing things to Minjeong. “If you take another finger I’ll allow you to cum. Want you?”

Minjeong's first response was a pathetic loud whimper. “I… I don’t Th-think I can take another.” Nayeon's hand leaves her dick and that makes her sad, but the other hand stays inside her anus. “Please, please. lee-t me cum.”

“Then be a good girl and take another finger.” Nayeon fingers were working extra hours on Minjeong ass to make her use to the intromission. She was opening her fingers inside Minjeong’s little entrance to gape her anus and make room for a third finger. 

“Ok… Ok. I’ll take it, but let me cum please.” Minjeong´s brain was already fried with all the unexpected pleasure she was getting from her ass and all she wants right now is to get some friction on her dick. When nayeon wasn't grabbing her she tried to grind against the desk, but that didn’t give her enough pleasure. She definitely needed Nayeon’s hand to make her cum.

“Good girl,” With a little bit of effort Nayeon puts her third finger inside Minjeong’s small anus. Her slender fingers feels so good against her warm walls, they were so long that were deeper than any other thing Minjeong had ever put on her ass. Also having three of them inside her ass makes her feel so filled. Having her anus this expanded was something really new to her.

Nayeon’s other hand came back to touch Minjeong’s dick, this time wrapping her fingers around the hard meat. While her work on the youngergirl ass was fast, really fucking her anus, the pace on her dick was more controled. Slow long pumps, or at least as long as her size allows, that had Minjeong’s shaft throbbing. The dual action was too much, and that added to the fact that Nayeon was complimenting her for taking her finger so well has Minejong at the very verge of the orgasm. But for some reason he knew she wasn't allowed to cum till her teacher gave her the direct order to do so.

Now the girl was holding the desk edges tightly till the point her knuckles turned white. The pleasure was so much that it was overwhelming. She was releasing patetic whimpers while her teacher was stuffing three fingers inside her stretched anus. “Good girl, you earned it. You can cum now.” Nayeon whispered to her ear and that was all she needed to stop holding her orgasm and pour out her cum on her teacher’s hand.

Minjeong released the desk and used her hands to cover her mouth as best as she could. After all they still were inside Nayeon’s office and her whimpers could get them to be caught, that would definitely end with her being expelled from college and Nayeon being fired. For that Minjeong tries to hold her whimpers, but didn’t help that nayeon still where fucking her ass while she was cumming, filling the big hand whit her hot milk. And even when it was a bit uncomfortable having her anus so stretched was also a very pleasant orgasm, even her legs were shaking for the pleasure and overwhelming feelings.

“Good girl. You did it so well.” Nayeon finally pulls her fingers out of Minjeong’s anus, leaving her entrance full open and feeling empty. “Actually you deserve more than a few points.” Minjeong's orgasm was so good that she had blurred vision. “If you can take my fingers again in the future I’ll let you pass my class with an A+.” Nayeon uses her panties to clean Minjeong´s cum from her finger while circling the desk to face the girl.” We call it a deal?” The teacher asked with her characteristic big smile, acting as if she hadn't just fucked one of hers students in the ass just moments ago.

[digitaldiarystuff]

False Hope pt.2

hii! i’m back with pt2 hope you enjoy it and if you want a third lmk pleaseee💕💕

————

pairing: Pedri Gonzalez x Y/N

summary: you’re close friends with Pedri and pretty much in love with him, pretending you’re not you went to comfort him but he seeks the comfort in a different way than you would’ve expected

genre: suggestive but not quite, angst

————

It’s been a week since Pedri made out with you and apologized and you still haven’t seen him. You left after his breakfast was on the table to run your imaginary errands and he tried talking to you but to no avail.

He tried reaching out after that to probably test the waters and you tried your best to remain cool. You didn’t want to let him know it meant so much more to you than it did to him, you were embarrassed and you didn’t even do anything.

Today was one of those days, he texted you in the morning saying he had to go to the training camp to get some tests done and he’d be free for the rest of the day and wanted you to come over to watch a movie but you just made up another excuse. He didn’t say anything back and you feared you were adding salt to injury (literally). You knew he needed you and quite frankly, you needed him as well but he was never going to be what you need and as much as you tried, you could never be what he asked for, just a friend. So that’s why you weren’t in the mood for some alone time with him and decided to ditch classes and watch Harry Potter. That turned out to be a very bad idea, Pedri Potter always on your mind.

Just as Hermione said ‘Wingardium Leviosa’ your doorbell rang and you were confused, you weren’t expecting any deliveries. Annoyed, you walked up and opened the door without checking from the peephole and saw a distraught Pedri standing there with some takeout.

“Pedro” you whispered confused.

“It’s Pedri to you, you know that” he shyly smiled and held up the bags. “I brought food”

You couldn’t even muster anything and he came in the house.

“I thought I told you I wasn’t available today.” You didn’t mean to sound harsh, just didn’t know what to do.

He finally looked back at you still standing by the door and let out a sigh.

“Look Y/N, I can’t tell you how sorry I am if you don’t let me see you. I don’t know what came over me that day and I don’t want to lose our friendship. I really care about you.” he concluded and you just heard everything you’ve been dreading to hear.

Everything was just a spur of the moment, he wanted to apologize so everything can go back to normal but you couldn’t even remember what normal was anymore. The second you felt his lips on your skin and lips, you were done pretending and you didn’t think you could go back to what it was before.

“Pedro, I…”

“Why do you keep calling me that?” he asked annoyed, you weren’t even doing it on purpose, it was just you didn’t feel as close anymore. Actually you felt even closer to him but that didn’t matter.

“Pedri, I know you didn’t mean any harm and I understand everything you’re saying.”

“So can we please go back to how we were now?” he asked a coy smile playing on his lips.

“Okay” you said defeated. You could never say no to him especially when he’s down.

You sat down on the couch leaving a respectful space between you two after getting some plates and glasses from the kitchen. He made himself comfortable like he always does but once you sat down his face fell a little.

“Everything okay?” you asked seeing his frown.

“Yeah, yeah everything’s good.” It certainly didn’t look like it but decided to drop the subject.

You ate without any words, just the movie playing in the background. You didn’t realize how many meals you passed until you started eating. You were so hungry that didn’t care when the sauce was running down the side of your mouth. Pedri saw you and giggled reaching for a napkin nearby, you were about to thank him and grab it but he decided it’d be better if he wiped the corner of your lips himself. He slides impossibly close to you and cleaned your face while holding you by your neck with his other hand and you felt like you couldn’t breathe again.

His effect on you was so powerful you couldn’t even say no to him, you knew you should’ve picked the napkin from his hands and used it on yourself but as soon as he came close to you it was game over and you hated yourself for it. You were too weak for him.

He looked up at your eyes after he’s done but still didn’t let go of your face while you were trying your best to avoid looking at him. He looked back at your lips and suddenly licked his lips but you decided you couldn’t handle his intense gaze anymore and leaned back on the couch.

“Thank you.”

He didn’t say anything back but didn’t go back to his side of the sofa either, just stayed where he was legs touching you. This was the actually normal way for you to watch a film, you even cuddled a few times before but now you just felt uncomfortable with the emotions every time he was close to you. They were unbearable and Pedri looked like he couldn’t tell at all, or worse he didn’t care that your breath hitched and your cheeks blushed every time he touched you.

That’s when you decided you had to either tell him how you feel or let go of your feelings for him because he’s made it clear he doesn’t want you like you want him. Was your friendship enough or were you just going to have to take a step back from him and hope time heals you?

When you thought about not seeing Pedri anymore again, you felt an overwhelming gut wrenching weight on your heart, not seeing his face or hearing his voice was too painful in your opinion and you knew the best course of action was to put everything you feel for him in the back of your mind and move on. You slowly relaxed after making a choice and leaned on his shoulder to watch the rest of the movie but you didn’t miss how he let out a breath after you did so. He smiled a little and put his arm around you thinking everything’s alright and you promised yourself you’d do anything to make it happen. You couldn’t lose him like this.

It had been a week since he came to your house and your friendship was back on track. You knew you had to go out and blow off some steam soon but given all your close girlfriends in Barcelona were out of your life now, you had no choice but ask Pedri if he wanted to go out with some friends of his.

“You know I’m not into clubs.” he pouted as you were on Facetime but he soon caved after your expression turned sour.

Now you were at a prestigious club with Pedri’s friends from the team and some of their girlfriends and you realized how much you actually needed this, drinking and singing at the top of your lungs, laughing and dancing. Pedri really wasn’t into any of this as he sat in the booth chatting with Ferran the whole night occasionally checking up on you and Sara. You were actually having a great night and thanked him multiple times.

“I’m just happy you’re enjoying yourself.” he smiled and pressed a kiss on your temple going back into the booth and your heart fluttered with just a simple gesture.

No, you’re not going down this rabbit hole again. You’re here to have fun as a single girl and you’re not doing anyone any favors being fixated on your best friend. Just then you felt a tap on your shoulder and looked back to see a tall and handsome guy smiling at you.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he flashed a perfect smile and you looked at Sara.

“I’ll be in the booth.” she grinned and let you do your own thing and you looked back at the guy and smiled.

“So, about that drink…” you said after he didn’t move and he came to his senses immediately leading you to the bar.

You and James were sat down at the bar for what felt like a few hours talking about your lives and what you did. It was a bad environment for a serious getting to know someone conversation but it had to do since he was just here to visit some friends and had to go back in a few days, you cursed your luck for giving you man either not attracted to you or lived in other cities but he was really fun to be around and you decided it wouldn’t hurt to enjoy yourself. You talked so much that you didn’t even realize it was past the time you promised Pedri you’d head out, only when Ferran found you to tell it’s time to go you knew.

You looked at Ferran and then James, he was looking at you with a sad look and you decided you wanted to see where this is headed.

“I think I’ll stick here for a while longer, you can go Ferran. Tell Sara I’ll see her on Sunday.” you smiled but Ferran looked terrified.

“Y/N are you sure, Pedri’s waiting.” you stopped when you heard his name but he didn’t even come get you himself. You remembered all the times you went out and he ditched you for a girl he just met.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, Pedri has my location on anyway.” you shrugged and turned your attention to James again who looked excited by your decision and Ferran left soon after.

You didn’t see them leave, Pedri didn’t even want to come say bye so you decided not to dwell on it and leave with James to his hotel, this wasn’t like you at all but the conversation and the vibes were there so what’s the harm in having a little fun?

The taxi pulled up in front of the hotel and you and James went into his room, he ordered a bottle of wine and went in the shower to freshen up and you were sitting on the bed looking at the beautiful Barcelona view when your eyes caught a black Porshe parked outside. You knew there were a million of them in the city but given Pedri has one of them you couldn’t help but wonder if there’s a possibility that it’s him. You tried getting a closer look at the plate but the street was dark and the windows were tinted so you couldn’t figure it out.

This is stupid, you thought. Why would he be outside of this random hotel at this hour? You felt James’ hands wrap around your waist and he left a few kisses on your neck when you leaned back against him. Just as you gave him more access, your phone buzzed indicating a text.

“You should check it” he smiled giving you up.

“Let me make sure it’s nothing urgent” you said and went into your purse.

Your eyes scanned over some unimportant notifications until you reached the most recent one:

‘I’m outside, come out’ -Pedri

————

[holdmymallowsweet]

What are you doing here? 02

Ominis Gaunt x f!MC Word count: 4684, properly tagged on AO3

Chapter summary: It's the start of a new school year, and Ominis hopes he and Sebastian can carry on as they used to, even if one of their trio is missing. Looking back, that thought seemed almost foolishly optimistic.

a/n: This is the first of two pre-library chapters, featuring Ominis’ thoughts and feelings and whereabouts during the first few weeks of their fifth year, while Sebastian and Mc are busy fighting trolls and sneaking into the restricted section. Enjoy!

Chapter 01 || Masterlist || Chapter 03

Chapter 02 - Relegated

Calling her arrival at Hogwarts ‘memorable’ was almost an understatement. Disrupting the feast, led through the great hall by the headmaster himself after a rather lively argument behind half-closed doors that had the entire student body sit in nervous anticipation, it was no wonder that she seemed to be the only thing deemed worthy of discussion by anyone who was not a quidditch enthusiast.

Ominis wasn’t too bothered by it. Usually the one who’d know everything that went on within the castle’s walls and not so secretly fond of gossip, after everything that had happened at the Sallow’s during the summer, he longed for some peace and quiet. A sense of routine, while he and Sebastian would try and figure out how to go on, now that one of them was missing.

Who they were, where they’d come from and why they’d made such a spectacle of their entrance didn’t have to be his concern, not tonight at least. They’d ended up at the opposite side of the Great Hall anyways, out of mind. It wouldn’t keep him from having a decent meal, a good night’s rest, a regular day of classes tomorrow. Nothing else would either, if he could help it.

Wishful thinking.

They’d barely passed the giant hourglasses to return to their common room for the night, when Sebastian took him by the arm, years of experience letting Ominis know before he even opened his mouth that he had other plans.

“Listen, Ominis-”

Ominis groaned. “What is it now?” He was so tired.

“I think I’ll make a detour into the restricted section before bed.”

Oh for Merlin’s sake.

“On our first night back? You could at least wait a day before getting yourself into trouble again.” And wasn’t he tired as well, after the day they’d had?

“There’s something I want to check.” Sebastian paused. “For Anne. If you’re worried about me, you could come too, if you’d like.”

Ominis raised an eyebrow. It seemed like an off-handed remark, but there was something pleading in his friend’s voice, and it did make him feel guilty for how he was about to answer. But not guilty enough. “I’m sure you don’t need my help to get yourself another detention.”

“Fair enough.” And just like that, Sebastian was gone.

Ominis took a deep breath. He suddenly felt nauseous, and it had nothing to do with the food.

Was this how his fifth year at Hogwarts was going to be like? Sebastian taking every opportunity to engage in extracurricular, clandestine activities and the detentions that would undoubtedly follow, where did that leave him? He’d hoped with Anne being the way she was, that Sebastian would perhaps be a bit more reasonable, grow up a tad more.

His exploits hadn’t bothered Ominis as much last year, when his friend first started digging through forbidden books and sought out the seclusion of the Undercroft by himself, but last year he had Anne. Anne, who would rather play games with Ominis than put her nose in old, eerie tomes, who would usually take his side in their petty arguments, who would listen to him and fill the silence with cheerful chatter, in a way only she could. In that moment, more than ever before, he was suddenly very aware that she was truly gone. 

It felt as if the realisation ate a hole through his stomach..

Ominis inhaled slowly, rubbing at the crease that formed between his brows. He was so tired.

The two Slytherins had walked up to the castle from Feldcroft, as they did every year. Making the journey to London and spending the whole day on a train had always seemed ridiculous when they lived that close to Hogwarts. 

In the years prior, the three of them would have left the Sallow’s house early and made a day of it in Hogsmeade, but it wouldn’t have been the same without Anne. So they’d spent as much time with her as possible, holding on, attempting to avoid the moment they’d have to leave her behind until the last second. It had been a subdued, gloomy journey after that, not to mention exhausting, both physically and emotionally.

Ominis stood there motionless for a while, trying to collect his thoughts. He was passed by waves of chattering students, eager to return to their warm beds and catch up with their dorm mates in private. Imelda stomped past him, cursing under her breath. Obviously upset about not getting to boss around her team on the Quidditch pitch this year, she would likely try to make it everyone else’s problem as well.

He sighed, resigned to head down to the common  room alone.

“Did you hear? About the new fifth year? Why they were late to the sorting?”

He strained his ears, determined not to miss the answer, slowing down a bit to walk behind the gossiping pair of friends. Change of plans. Perhaps holding on to his old habits would do him some good after all. And perhaps there was a chance for some more light-hearted thoughts to occupy his mind. Something intriguing and perhaps funny to discuss with Sebastian when he got back.

“No, I just heard they were with Professor Fig. Did something happen then?”

“I don’t know any details about it.” The girl paused for dramatic effect. “...but they say their carriage was attacked by a dragon. Some bloke from the ministry was ripped apart right in front of them.”

Oh, you can’t be serious.

“Nothing yet.” Ominis teased. “I hope we get to see- or at least hear one today.”

All in all, his mood had been surprisingly good this morning. Leaning against the common room windows, he’d amused himself trying to keep the new first years on the lookout for mermaids, listening to their little sounds of excitement and impatience, wondering how long he could keep them there before they caught on. 

It had been Anne’s idea last year, and the fun had lasted until the prefects told them to cut it out. Ominis knew it would never be quite the same without her, but she’d insisted he do it again, ‘in her memory’.

He’d tried hard not to think about the implications of that phrasing.

“I- I think I heard one!”

Sounds of little hands slamming against the window and excited, high pitched gasps made the corners of his mouth twitch into a sly grin.

Being back at Hogwarts and getting a good night’s sleep in his familiar bed had done wonders to rid him of the near constant feelings of unease and dread he had since Anne had been cursed.

Ominis missed her dearly, but it was a relief to be away from the now gloomy home in Feldcroft that had once been his sanctuary, from the tension stemming from Solomon’s anxiety and his constant disagreements and shouting matches with a helpless, short tempered Sebastian, periodically disturbed by Anne’s cries and moans of pain. 

In the family’s time of hardship and grief, he’d felt like an intruder.

Ominis would have liked to help, he would have done anything, anything for his closest and only friends, but in the end all he could really do was stand there and listen to the Sallows telling him that another examination had not come up with results, that another remedy they tried had failed. The best he could do was stay out of their way, trying to melt into the wall.

A week before they had to leave for school, the consensus amongst the healers was that nothing could be done except have her rest and wait to see if she got better on her own. They were told she wouldn’t return to Hogwarts. 

Sebastian had not taken it well.

Determined as he’d been to stay awake and wait for his return last night, the exhaustion of the day had caught up with Ominis, and he’d been fast asleep when Sebastian had snuck back into their dormitory. They’d made up for it in the morning, gossiping about her as much as everyone else as they’d gotten dressed. It felt normal, comforting. 

Until, after a particularly wild theory of Ominis’, Sebastian had blurted out “...wait until Anne-”

It had been an innocent mistake. Ominis hadn’t commented on it, but the carefree mood was marred by heavy clouds. But the rain hadn’t fallen, not yet, at least.

Ominis listened for the sounds of his friend, who went through his newly stolen library books in front of the fireplace, pacing back and forth and sometimes mumbling to himself. He seemed to be doing all right, for now, at least.

Even if he was no longer in the mood for conversation.

Sebastian had been picking up bits and pieces of information about the new fifth-year and her journey to Hogwarts on his way to the library, most of it probably exaggerated, some of it seemingly complete and utter nonsense. 

Regardless, most of the Slytherins thought of it as an excellent adventure, a riveting tale that would go down in Hogwarts history. Imelda thought it was brilliant of her to take away all the attention from the first years.

Ominis couldn’t help but feel sorry for the girl. He might have expected her to relish the attention if she’d been a Gryffindor or even a Slytherin, but Hufflepuffs were usually happy to quietly exist in the background and mind their own business. He could relate.

He decided to stop thinking about it. Either way, their paths likely wouldn’t ever cross, unless they’d happen to walk through a classroom door at the same time.

“What do you think mermaids look like?”

Only, the way things progressed, thinking of her or not wasn’t his decision to make.

“What do you mean, you fought a troll?” Ominis asked, distraught. “Are you all right? Is she all right? Did you get hurt?”

“Don’t worry, Ominis, we’re fine,” Sebastian drawled, unbothered.

Sebastian hadn’t wasted any time telling him about his exploits in Hogsmeade with the new fifth-year. They were sitting by the common room fire, eating their way through an assortment of snacks Sebastian had stolen from the kitchens on his way back. Naturally, he’d been rather hungry, having missed dinner. And almost getting smashed to pieces did apparently conjure up quite the appetite.

He’d barely made it back in time for curfew, stumbling into their common room where Ominis, first annoyed, then worried, had been pacing up and down waiting for him.

“She was brilliant, you should have been there.”

Why hadn’t he been?

“Real duelling prodigy, that one,” Sebastian stated through a mouthful of food.

Yes, Ominis had gathered that much from their Defence Against the Dark Arts class earlier that day.

He frowned, his good mood from this morning long gone. He hadn’t talked to his best friend since the end of Hecat’s class, when he told a stunned and confused Ominis that he’d invited the girl who just beat him to Crossed Wands, but the Hogwarts rumour mill had done it’s best to keep him informed about their whereabouts since then.

Sallow and the new fifth-year really hit it off.

Sallow and the new fifth-year were seen going to Hogsmeade together.

Didn’t Sallow have other friends he was usually with?

No one really cared that much.

It didn't exactly feel good. And although Ominis was usually content to leave Sebastian to his own devices, after being deserted for almost the entire day, one might think an apology would be in order. 

Perhaps an inquiry about what he’d been up to- nothing, really, but it would have been polite to ask.

But it was Sebastian, and politeness was not his strong suit.

He listened to Sebastian chewing noisily, feeling his way through the stack of food until his hand landed on an apple tart. More because he wanted to keep his mouth busy than because he was hungry, and also because he’d already gotten his fingers sticky, Ominis took a small bite. If he said something now, it wouldn’t be anything nice and he wasn’t spoiling for a fight. 

“There’s more to all of this. She practically admitted it,” Sebastian said. Dreamily, intrigued.

Understandable, all things considered. Not yet alarming.

“Just wait, I’ll get to the bottom of this.”

Ominis didn’t like the sound of that at all.

Sebastian was starting to get obsessive again. Ominis knew him well enough to recognize the signs. Sebastian had been like this when he’d joined Crossed Wands, when he’d started sneaking into the restricted section, when he’d started to teach himself spells- dangerous, forbidden spells, many of which Ominis knew his friend didn’t bother telling him about anymore after he’d first voiced his concerns.

And now there’s the new fifth-year. Sebastian was going to make her his new research project, his new favourite pastime, and while it might have been good for him to have something to distract him from Anne, it made Ominis feel...

He refused to call it jealousy. He’d settle for ‘concerned’.

“Perhaps you shouldn’t.” Ominis tried to keep his tone light, but didn’t quite succeed.

“Why not?”

Ominis sighed heavily. “I’m sorry, only… I’m having a bad feeling about this.”

They were silent for a moment. Then, Ominis heard a stifled chuckle from his friend.

“When you say a bad feeling, you mean like an-“

 “Sebastian, don’t-“

“Like an ominous feeling?”

Ominis half-heartedly threw his leftover tart at him.

Maybe it wouldn’t have been that bad if he felt like he could ever get a break from her, but she seemed to be everywhere. Except of course when she seemed to be nowhere at all, sneaking out of school at odd hours, coming back hours later carrying the faint scent of the forbidden forest, or the lake, but even then, she was always… there. In the whispers in the hallways, in rumours, slipping into every conversation he’d have with Sebastian, at some point.

In their first Herbology lesson, it was her mandrake that shattered the greenhouse windows and almost took out his eardrums, turning an already debilitating class into a headache.

While he struggled in potions, she somehow excelled at the subject and even found time to steal from Sharp's office.

Ominis had groaned internally at the whole spectacle. If Garreth Weasley could put her up to theft not five minutes after making her acquaintance, he’d rather not think about what sort of mischief she got up to with Sebastian.

Like sneaking into the restricted section of the library. The tale of Sebastian Sallow taking the fall for her spread through the school like wildfire. When Ominis had asked him why he did it, Sebastian had simply stated: “Because that’s what I do for my friends. I’ve taken the fall for you before, anytime we’ve done something bad enough that I thought it might get back to your parents.”

Ominis hadn’t known what to answer. She’d been at school not even a week, and yet she already enjoyed the same friendship privileges as himself, in Sebastian's eyes. It felt as if he’d been punched. He knew his feelings were stupid and childish, it had been absurd to assume that Sebastian would never want or need any other friends. But still, Ominis couldn’t help but wonder why he wasn’t enough. 

He wanted, needed to let these feelings out somehow, and at first he considered putting them into his letters to Anne- but Anne had enough to deal with, sitting in that dreary house in agony with no one but her uncle for company. 

Ominis thought of her every day, everytime her empty chair in their classrooms reminded him of her absence, every time he heard someone talk about flying, or taking a sneaky dip in the lake before it got too cold. All things Anne used to love, that she wouldn’t do again, perhaps not ever.

If she tried to fly a broom and was struck with a bout of pain while mid air, she’d die.

No, he wasn’t going to bother Anne with his troubles. If she needed to know that her brother was positively smitten with the new student, Sebastian could tell her himself.

As the week went on, thankfully without further incidents, Ominis became more accustomed to her presence. She was, to his surprise, a fairly decent student, learning new spells on the first or second try and performing well in class, even when the teachers put her on the spot. How she managed that, when she seemed to prioritise gallivanting through the highlands over studying, was a mystery. She was polite, outgoing and cheerful, quickly making friends and wrapping her classmates around her finger with an effortless charm not unlike Sebastian’s.

The more time passed, the less Ominis could bring himself to share the enthusiasm.

Of course he’d been somewhat curious about her too, at least at first. 

He’d even made small, tentative attempts at approaching her. Perhaps making sarcastic remarks about her duel with Sebastian and their adventures in Hogsmeade had not been the best way to do it, but her complete and utter indifference, to the point of not even replying to him, left him dumbstruck. She could have at least quipped back.

And it stung- the realisation that she didn’t recognise him. 

Which meant Sebastian hadn’t mentioned him to her, at all.

He started to seek out the solitude of the Undercroft more often, lately the only place where he felt truly free from her presence, even if every empty crate in there seemed to taunt him with memories of himself and the Sallow twins, of nights they’d spent sneaking out of the common room to laugh and play games and eat stolen food from the kitchens. 

Simpler times that he’d never thought he’d one day miss so desperately that his very soul seemed to ache.

He knew he’d be there alone now, like all the other times, though he secretly wished he’d walk in there to find Sebastian waiting for him. Ready to carry on as they used to, even if there was someone missing. At least it would be a small comfort, for both of them.

Hearing the familiar mechanical whirring of the Undercroft’s hidden entrance made him pause, and for the briefest moment it seemed he’d gotten his wish.

“Hello Sebastian.”

No. Wrong.

“Wait.”

It wasn’t Sebastian. In an instant, he tensed up, his stomach filled with dread. Someone found the Undercroft, someone he didn’t recognise, someone who wasn’t supposed to be there. If they left without saying anything, he would never find out who they were.

“You there. I can hear you.”

Say something, anything.

“Oh, hello. Ominis, isn’t it? I believe we have Potions together. And- Herbology?”

His insides turned to ice in an instant, as he realised what was going on here.

It was her.

Of course it was her.

She tried her best to sound cheerful, but there was definitely a nervous undertone in her voice. And while it wasn’t his most pressing concern, the fact that even now she didn’t seem to remember him from any of their classes, other than those he was obviously rubbish in, did nothing to endear herself to him.

“I recognise that voice.” He said, more to himself than to her. “You’re the new fifth-year.”

He tried his best to sound calm, failing miserably as his frozen insides melted into white, hot anger.

“Did you just come from the Undercroft? How did you get in there?”

He already knew. He wasn’t asking because he needed the answer, he wanted to know if she was going to be honest about it.

“That room’s called ‘the Undercroft’? Ah. Well, I was exploring and suddenly found myself in a strange passageway-“

Liar.

He had enough of her. Of both of them.

“Don’t lie to me. No one ‘stumbles’ upon that room. Sebastian told you, didn’t he? You breathe a word about this place to anyone and not even your precious Professor Fig will be able to help you. My father is friends with the Headmaster. I’m not afraid to exploit that connection if I need to.”

It was an empty threat, of course. He hadn’t spoken to his father in ages, and he wasn’t keen on being in the vile man’s debt, especially over something like this. But there was a good chance she didn’t know and if she asked around, all she would find out was that his father was indeed friends with Professor Black, and perhaps that would frighten her enough to keep her mouth shut.

“You needn’t threaten me. I’m not going to say anything about your Undercroft.” The Hufflepuff’s voice sounded more assured than before. If she was at all intimidated by him, she didn’t show it. “And Sebastian is a good friend. You shouldn’t immediately assume the worst of him.”

“I don’t need you to tell me about my oldest friend, thank you very much.” His patience was at a breaking point, and it finally seemed to dawn on her that there was no way to salvage this conversation.

“Ominis, I just meant-“

“I know what you meant. Sebastian gets himself in enough trouble. He doesn’t need your help.”

At least she had enough sense not to respond. He walked past her, giving her a much wider berth than necessary. The thought of accidentally touching her, even briefly, made him sick.

It wasn’t entirely fair to her, and a small part inside of him knew that, but at that moment, it felt as if she’d taken everything from him. His best and oldest friend, his sanctuary, his very thoughts and feelings, everything seemed to revolve around her and Ominis just wanted it to end.

Fuming, he stormed into the Undercroft. Sebastian was still there, as expected, cheerful and completely oblivious. “Hello Ominis, I-“

“You.”

The atmosphere in the room shifted instantly.

“Yes? What did I do now?”

“Are you seriously pretending not to know?” Ominis snarled, anger dripping from every word like poison.

Sebastian went dead silent for a moment.

“Ominis, let me explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain. I trusted you.”

“And I trust her, I wouldn’t have taken her here if I didn’t. You know me. I promise you she won’t tell anyone else, I won’t either,” Sebastian pleaded.

“I suppose that includes me,” Ominis spat. “Would you have told me she was here if I hadn’t found out by myself?”

“I knew you wouldn’t take it well. It was wrong not to ask you before I showed her-”

Ominis snorted.

“-but I know she will keep it to herself. I can’t tell you why, not yet, but I know she’ll keep my secrets. Trust me.”

“But it’s not your secret, is it? It’s mine.” Ominis couldn’t make sense of the feelings welling up inside him anymore. He felt angry, betrayed, but most of all, hurt, and it all seemed to merge together to form a dull, throbbing ache in his head.

Yes, it was his secret. His special place, one of the few good things that came out of being a Gaunt. For him to share with the ones he loved and trusted. And even if Sebastian was right, even if she could be trusted- and he was not at all convinced that she could- it should have been his decision. 

If Sebastian had bothered to actually introduce them to each other, to include Ominis in whatever the two of them were up to, if they had gotten to know each other, on his own terms and in his own time, perhaps he might have told her himself.

But it wasn’t only the betrayal. If only he could find the right words to tell Sebastian just how abandoned he felt, tossed aside for a newer, shinier toy.

He wasn’t enough. He’d never been, for anyone. Too weak, too useless, too defective.

He couldn’t bring himself to say it. What if he said it, and Sebastian couldn’t pretend it wasn’t true?

Tears were threatening to spill out of his useless eyes, and he squeezed them shut, furiously pinching the bridge of his nose, desperately willing them to stay inside.

“Ominis?” Sebastian said, cautiously approaching him.

Ominis took a deep breath, fighting down the tears, at least for now. He leaned against one of the stone pillars.

“Anything else?” He hated how choked his voice sounded.

“What do you mean?”

“Is there anything else you told her, that I should know about? Be honest.” Ominis hoped the answer was ‘no’. And for that to be the truth.

Sebastian took a moment to answer. When he did, he spoke slowly and carefully, as if he was scared the wrong words would make Ominis’ temper flare up again. “Nothing that you’d disapprove of, I think. We talked a bit about Anne, and… you.”

Ominis raised an eyebrow. “Me?”

“I told her you’re blind and that you use your wand to get around.”

“Why, thank you. I’m sure that would have eluded her otherwise.” Ominis remarked dryly, undoubtedly getting an eye roll in return.

“I told her the Undercroft is special to you-” Sebastian went on, ignoring Ominis derisive snort.

“-and a bit about your family.”

That hit Ominis like a Graphorn, making him tense up with a sudden, poorly concealed panic. “You didn’t-”

“No, of course not. Nothing she wouldn’t have found out eventually anyway.”

The crease between his brows and the harsh line of his lips formed involuntarily as a familiar darkness crept into his mind. His thoughts must have been obvious to his long-time friend.

“I’d never tell her about anything you’d want to keep a secret,” Sebastian said.

“I wanted to keep the Undercroft a secret.”

Sebastian groaned. 

It filled Ominis with a sick sort of satisfaction. “What did you tell her then?”

“...just, well. That you’re descended from Slytherin himself, that the Gaunts care a lot about blood status. But I let her know you’re not like them.”

So she knew. Perhaps that was why she’d seemed so flustered when talking to him.

“What did she say?”

“Nothing much. I’m not sure how much she knows about these things to be honest, I mean, she’s a Hufflepuff. And I didn’t bring her down here to give her a lesson on pureblood culture,” Sebastian said, unconcerned.

“Then there was no need to tell her anything. If she didn’t know, you could have left it at that,” Ominis said, irritated.

“It’s not exactly a secret, Ominis. Everyone else knows and you’re classmates, she would have found out eventually. Wouldn’t you rather she heard it from me?”

“I’d rather she heard it from me, actually.”

Sebastian huffed, obviously amused even if he didn’t dare to laugh.

“You just said there was no need to tell her anything.”

“I… fine. Just do me a favour and keep me and my family’s secrets out of your future conversations.” Ominis said dejectedly, as the fight went out of him. He hoped this would be the end of their argument. His head was still hurting from all the shouting and he just wanted to go back to their dormitory and take a nap, forget about her and all of this for a blissful few hours.

“All right. But now that she knows about the Undercroft, is she allowed back in here? It is a good place for spellcasting and there’s more I’d like to-“

“Sebastian, please.” Ominis’ voice was little more than a whisper. He pinched the bridge of his nose again in frustration.

“Please, I know you find her intriguing, that you’re using her to distract yourself from how much you miss Anne-“

“I’m not using her, we’re friends.” Sebastian’s voice dropped, he genuinely sounded hurt.

“You know what I mean. We’re friends, Sebastian, the two of us and Anne. All I want is for things to go back to how they were before, and so do you.” It was a last effort, a genuine plea for Sebastian to let her be, before their friendship went up in flames.

“That’s not-” Sebastian broke off mid-sentence and took a deep breath. “You don’t understand.”

“No, I do not.” Ominis admitted.

He wouldn’t for a while.

more a/n: But he will in the next chapter! …maybe. So this turned out quite a bit more angsty than intended, but I think Ominis’ anger at Mc when he finds out she’s been in the undercroft is very genuine and doesn’t just come out of nowhere, so I’ve spent a lot (and probably way too much) time thinking about how he must have felt about Sebastian and Mc’s friendship. Also I did settle on Anne having been cursed right at the start of the summer holidays. Because I’m pure evil and I like the thought of Ominis coming to Hogwarts like “at least I still have Sebastian…” only to have him snatched away by Mc. …sorry. Originally this and the third were one chapter, but the length of it got slightly out of hand and I’ve had the perfect spot to split it exactly in the middle (more or less, they’re 4k+ words each now). I hope to get the next one out a bit sooner, so you won’t have to wait that long.  I hope to see you all next time! And thanks again for every one of your sweet comments and your support, it means the world to me ❤️ And finally, as usual, this fic has no beta (unfortunately) but I do my best to make sure it’s free of spelling errors. If you find any anyway, or you notice me using words wrong, let me know (nicely) so I can fix it.

[itsaash]

Hamptons Cubs: Midnight

Prompt credit to @noots-fic-fests and character credit to @lumosinlove!

Today we're back to the Hamptons featuring some boys just trying to figure it out

Rated M, 1900 words, Read on ao3, if you prefer

Finn didn’t know what to do with his heart. It was 8 sizes too big and yet felt like it was in a vice. He wanted to pull it out and put it on ice and turn it fucking down .

Logan was in his house. With Leo. Going into Leo’s bedroom with him after an awkward evening of talking about careers and apartments and absolutely not college.

Leo must have made himself dizzy from all the darting around his eyes were doing, between the other two men, who were dancing on conversational thin ice. Finn didn’t blame Leo for yawning and pulling Logan into his bedroom with a kind goodnight. Finn had retreated to his own room and tried to force himself to sleep, hoping it would all make more sense in the morning.

But all Friday Logan had been with Leo in the kitchen like an adorable snarky shadow, and god, they were so cute together. Between frittatas and pasta salad and paninis Finn saw Logan cleaning up behind Leo like he was made for it. He saw Leo laughingly take a steak knife out of Logan’s hand (that he was trying to cut peppers with) and guide him to the sink full of dishes instead, with a kiss to the curve of his neck that forced himself to walk away from watching.

Friday, Saturday, Sunday passed with Finn trying to work, trying to not see the extra love that was cooked into their meals with the presence of Logan being around Leo. His parents loved having someone new there and at any meal they ate all together it was easy enough to stay polite but quiet. To only see the love shimmering between Leo and Logan out of the corner of his eyes because to look at it full on felt like it would burn his retinas like the sun.

Logan and Leo .

On Sunday after a dinner of grilled local sausages, a green salad from the garden, and smashed potatoes, Finn grew the courage to offer to help with dishes. Missing the time he usually had with Leo felt like a gaping opening in his heart and so he shuffled into the kitchen and settled in at the sink, aiming for casual.

“Oh hey Finn, thanks sugar. You might want to leave that pan soaking for a bit yet, the meat got nice and stuck on there.”

“Sounds good Leo, happy to help,” Finn said, holding his hands under the running water for just a breath.

“Busy weekend? Seems like you had a lot of work to do,” Leo asked.

“Hmm? Oh, oh, yeah. I didn’t get done what I wanted to this week, so I was trying to catch up. I got put on a new book recently. It’s a really great project, but I’ve just kind of … stuck on it lately, for some reason.”

Reasons including: it’s hard to focus on editing when his mind wasn’t sure what year it was, was time travelling every time he looked up and saw Logan.

Leo nodded in understanding as he finished bringing the dirty dishes to the sink. He put away the leftovers in silence as they worked together for a while. Finn took a deep breath as he scrubbed the extra dirty pan.

“I’m guessing Logan told you all about how he saved me in that history class, huh?”

Leo propped a hip against the counter near Finn, relaxed with his arms crossed. “Well he was actually pretty sure you saved him, so I guess it sounds like you helped each other.”

Finn dropped the sponge and turned to Leo, his breath heaving.

“I’m sorry,” Finn blurted out.

Leo cocked his head to the side, eyes soft. “For what?”

“That I kissed your boyfriend,” Finn said in a rush, making it sound like all one word.

“Oh sugar, Finn, don’t apologise. It’s ok. It was ages ago, I didn’t even know him then.” He picked up a towel and started drying the cookware Finn had washed before continuing. “I’m actually really glad you had each other. It makes me happy to think about the two of you studying, helping each other out.”

Finn managed a half smile at the thought of his and Logan’s study session.

“Is it ok that we’re here, Finn? If it’s weird, it’s totally fine. We can head home for the week. You’ve been … quiet …. this weekend and we really aren’t trying to mess up your week.” Leo hesitated. “Not to get in the middle of it, but Logan did mention you might feel like he ghosted you. Or that maybe you feel some anger towards him?”

“No, no! Did he say that?” Finn ran both hands through his hair, getting it wet, and took a deep breath, shaking his head. “I don’t remember it that way. Please, stay. I was surprised, like shock and awe , like get me a fainting couch type surprised. And I think it made me seize up a bit. But I see the two of you are really happy, it’s so sweet. Please, stay. Have a fun week out of the city.” Finn turned and finished cleaning the last dish and dried his hands.

Leo smiled, towel moving slowly over the dish in his hand. “Thanks Finn. That means a lot to me.”

Finn nodded and turned, meaning to head upstairs. That was about as much of confronting this weirdness that he could handle for today. Logan might be back in from his conversation with his parents at any time.

“And Finn?” Leo called. He turned back, leaning against the wall, hip popped out, listening. “Don’t avoid us, okay? If you don’t want to? I promise there’s no hard feelings on our end.” Finn just gave a small smile and nod, but the worried look lifted, just a bit, before he turned to go upstairs.

~~~~~

Logan had been helping Leo and between frittatas and his pasta salad and peach pie they had been busy all weekend. Logan was so impressed by his boyfriend, was soaking up every moment of watching Leo in his element, and with a backdrop worthy of a postcard too. Leo had even let Logan peel the peaches and mix the salad, although mostly Logan cleaned and organised and prepared while Leo cooked.

But, Finn. Logan didn’t know what to think. The shock had faded somewhat in the past two days of helping Leo with meals. It was a busy gig, an easy distraction. But then he’d glance out the window and catch a glimpse of Finn’s red hair out the window, amidst the beautiful garden and sprawling lawn. And his heart would stutter and he’d forget where he was for a moment. He’d think of books and candles and highlighters until he looked at Leo. Then reality would spin itself around him again and he’d kiss his boyfriend on the cheek as he walked to the fridge to put something away and tried to live in the present.

Sunday night they sat outside to watch the sunset, it wasn’t fully dark until nearly 10, and they sipped their drinks and watched the colour fade from the garden and flowers and trees as colours bloomed across the sky instead. And then those faded too, and the stars started sparkling out of nothingness. They sat in loungers beside each other, gaze shifting from the horizon to the sky. Leo’s hand was still warm in his with blankets over both of them.

Logan turned his head from the stars to Leo, just as awed by the sight of his love, even in the dim light.

“So are we staying the week still?”

Leo hummed. “Yeah, Finn said he wants us to. You ok with it? It’s ok if you’re not.”

Logan took a moment to trace his eyes over Leo’s cupid bow as he collected his thoughts. “I still want to. It’s beautiful here, and I have some guilt about how I treated Finn, but really I have nothing but good memories of him.”

“Yeah? You ready to talk more about it?”

Logan took in the stars. Orion’s Belt, the Big Dipper, the sparkling dots that could tell any story, told them all. When he had gathered his thoughts from the spaces between the stars, he went on.

“It was just a few months. But it’s burned into my mind like when you close your eyes after looking at something too bright. Finn is … bright.”

Leo chuckled and nodded at that, Logan squeezed his hand three times.

“Really, we pretty much just studied. We were in the zone, essay writing and memorising,” Logan continued. “Then we went to a party, and we kissed.” He set his head back against the lounge chair. “And Le, it was such a good kiss. It was a long, beautiful, hot kiss.” Logan sighed. “And I think I said something like I’m not gay ? And then the semester was pretty much over, and I was scared, and I didn’t call for months. And when I did, his number had changed.”

Leo reached over and took Logan’s hand in both of his, running his thumb in circles. 

“And I kissed boys after that, and slept with girls, and never felt a hint of the spark I had with him.” He turned his head towards Leo. “Until I met you, of course.” Logan turned onto his side and ran his fingertips down Leo’s cheek. “Remember? We talked, and ate, and when you kissed me, there were the sparks of sunshine filling every part of me.”

Leo smiled, and gripped his hand tighter. “I’m glad you had each other, love. That sounds lovely, and kind of really sad.”

Logan smiled a half smile. “I love you so much. Leo, you are the light of my life. I kissed Finn, one evening, years ago. Today, I’m with you and I want you .”

Leo smiled and they leaned across the small space between chairs to press their lips together.

“You want to stay?” Leo asked.

“Yeah, I do. Let’s have our little vacation, let’s relax, and eat, enjoy the scenery,” he said, waving a hand vaguely around at the dark.

Leo’s watch beeped, midnight.

They sat in the deep quiet for a minute, hands connected between the chairs.

“You told me once your first kiss with a guy had been in college. Was that Finn then?” Leo asked softly into the darkness.

“Oui, soleil, it was.” He made the move to forgo his chair in favour of joining Leo in his. He climbed on top of Leo, pressing them chest to chest. “You were my first everything else, though.”

He leaned down and pressed their lips together and Leo tilted his head up into the kiss.

“I tried with other people in college, but it was never right, never felt good, until it was you,” Logan peppered Leo’s face with kisses. The darkness hugged them as they kissed, making them feel like the only people in the world.

Logan pressed a deep kiss down to Leo's lips, leaving him breathless. Then he stood, one leg on either side of the chair, and pulled Leo’s body down the lounge chair until his hips were near the edge. His long legs sprawled off the end onto the soft grass. Logan backed up and dropped to his knees under the midnight bright stars. The grass was only darkness, but was soft under his knees, cool in contrast to the hard heat that was soon filling his mouth.

“I love this, I never get to make you come on Sundays,” Logan murmured against his skin.

Leo huffed a laugh, arching his back involuntarily. “I think it is Monday by now, baby, ahhh.”

Logan just hummed and swallowed in response.

Leo could hardly see Logan through the darkness, but the stars twinkling in the sky kept him company when stars sparked and exploded behind his eyes.

[sissytobitch10seconds]

One Hell of a Beginning

Fandom: Umbrella Academy Summary: Viktor has to go on a grand quest to tell a man he's had a crush on since his Freshman year of college that he got pregnant after they spent one night together at a party while slightly tipsy. Warnings: Pregnancy, mentions of abortion, trans male pregnancy, and anxiety attacks Word Count: 6,737 Ship(s): Five Hargreeves/Viktor Hargreeves

Archive link!

A/N: So a couple people wanted to see the way that Five reacted to the baby from the first part of this series, so I wrote it! It's very unlikely that I'm going to write anything else in this series because I feel like it'd be the same thing as what I wrote in a couple other fics but with different things going on in the background. I hope that you guys can enjoy this! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

Allison was going to get suspicious the longer that they had to dance around her, Viktor knew that.

Despite that knowledge and him being an overall smart person in general, he kept moving the goalpost to try and avoid completing the plan that he and Klaus had come up with. The note stared him in the face from the homescreen of his phone, constantly reminding him of what he had to do every time he opened up one of his relax-time games or tried to flick through social media between classes.

Classes were almost finished, most professors having already given their finals and graduation nearing. Viktor had finished enough of his work that he had basically nothing to do other than catch up on sleep.

He had wondered over the past couple of weeks how much harder it would have been to keep his secret from his roommate if he didn’t have the excuse of being a college student. He knew that a lot of their hallmates had the same kind of attitude as he did, so he was able to skate under the radar. Sleeping all the time could be blamed on him catching up on the sleep that he had missed while he was studying for finals. Mood swings could be passed off on the anxiety and stress that came with graduating and having to move out into the real world. The vomiting was harder to explain since Viktor made a rule of not drinking more than a single mixed drink even when in his own dorms, but even then he could just wave it off saying that his body was unhappy with their new final-induced diet. Finals were a good excuse for cravings as well since he could say that it was a good way to get his body’s daily nutrients quickly or some other poorly worded excuse.

The only problem was that Allison was smart and had been living with Viktor for four years. She was getting suspicious and he could tell by the way that she continued to try and pry into him whenever he gave her one of those excuses. He usually tried to make sure that he ate three square meals a day even if that happened to be while walking to his next class or around a book about music theory. She knew that he slept for at least five hours a night and supplemented the missed sleep with coffee during finals. She knew that he made sure to eat a balance of junk and healthy foods, something that had been drilled into him by his parents.

The last straw was going to be a combination of the appointment Klaus had just picked him up for and him going to church last Sunday. He usually only went to church when his parents were in town and they weren’t going to be showing up until graduation in two weeks. He had gone because he had felt like it was important to try and access the spirituality that his parents had always promised was there, but he had never felt. It was the same, despite the little life that he was carrying inside of him. He was considering taking Jayme up on their offer to attend the full moon rituals she was holding with her coven just to see if that would help either.

Something about learning that he was pregnant had completely changed how he had looked at the world. The decision to go through with the pregnancy and keep the baby had been another step towards that change, but not as much as the test coming back positive. A part of him deep inside must have known that would be the answer he was going to give when he got the result before even he did. It felt more final than any other decision in his life had. He knew that he would have been able to back out of college if he needed to, or move out of the dorm that he shared with a stranger at the time. There was always something to fall back on or a way to get out of that decision, but not with this one.

Viktor was standing in front of the door to his own apartment, frozen with fear. He knew that what he was going to do next didn’t even involve having to talk about his little secret. The only thing that he had to do was ask for something, he didn’t have to explain it if he didn’t want to. Even after prompting.

Those were Klaus’ words, Viktor would never be brave enough to refuse to give information to Allison when she looked at him with that unsure expression. He always wanted to reassure her that he was okay and validate every decision that he made that she didn’t approve of. She had that kind of motherly tendency about her despite her penchent of making bad decisions herself. The voice mails from her ex-boyfriend from Freshman year were proof enough of that.

“You can do this,” he muttered to himself as he grasped the handle to the door and then walked in. 

Allison was sitting on the couch with Raymond, he current boyfriend and an English major. They had a couple of books on the coffee table that they were purposefully ignoring despite the fact that Viktor knew their finals weren’t quite over yet.

“Hey, you’re home,” Allison smiled as she turned to look back at her roommate.

“That I am,” he replied as he closed the door behind him. He was trying to look casual as he shed his jacket and then dumped it on the little counter that they had in their makeshift kitchen. Their dorm was better than a lot of the other ones offered by the university, but it was still shit. He was glad he was going to be graduating and moving into a new apartment before the baby came.

Even just thinking about the fact that in a few months time he was going to have a whole child relying on him for their every need sent a shiver of anxiety up his spine. He always wished that he had kept the jacket on while traversing through his apartment after he remembered that the only remaining physical proof of his pregnancy was tucked into the pocket.

He tried to play it cool as he walked into the living room so that he was standing next to the couch. He awkwardly folded his arms over his chest and stomach, which hadn’t begun to change in a noticeable way but Viktor was still very nervous about. He cleared his throat and then shifted from foot to foot as he asked, “Do you think that you could give me Luther’s number?”

Allison had been half ignoring him the entire time that he was back in their apartment, obviously hoping that he would go to his room or pick up whatever he needed to spend time with Klaus. He was usually out of their dorm when she had her boyfriend over after the time that he had heard them being intimate through the paper thin wall that separated their rooms from each other. When she heard him ask that, her brows immediately flew into her hairline and she turned to look at him, “What?”

“Y-you still have it, right? I know that it would be totally in your right to delete it since what you guys had didn’t even really last that long and was totally weird but I know that you still talk sometimes so I was hoping that you would still have it and would feel comfortable giving it to me,” he rambled. The words were tumbling out of his mouth until they were basically overlapping and on top of each other.

She held up her hand to silence him before he could continue his ramble. While he had been talking she was untangling her legs from Ray’s so that she could stand up and face him properly. “Viktor, I don’t mean what number, I meant why did you want it? You and Luther had about one conversation and it went poorly because he’s a huge himbo. Why do you want his number?”

“I need it,” he said, which was entirely unhelpful. Viktor tried to wrack his mind for excuses that he could give her about why he wanted the number. 

It had apparently been too long since her initial ask as she then said, “I know, but why?”

“I’m trying to get some information from him that I really need,” his eyes flickered over to Allison. He knew that if he told her then Ray would hear again quickly, but for some reason his brain was more okay with him hearing through his girlfriend than through his own mouth. Usually it would be the other way around since he had been the subject of several nasty gossip trains when they were in college, so he preferred that people just not talk about him as a whole. However, having to tell everyone that he was one of those people that got pregnant on a one night stand in college wasn’t really something he wanted to have to keep admitting.

“Why don’t I step out for a moment and give you two a second to talk? You can let me know when it’s okay to come back,” Ray said as he got up from the couch. He held Allison’s waist to bring her closer so that he could kiss her cheek. 

“Thank you, baby,” she murmured as she brushed her hand over the side of his face.

Viktor’s heart ached as he wished that he could have that kind of relationship with Five. If he had just had the guts to go up and talk to him then he wouldn’t have ended up pregnant at twenty-two with no one to help him raise the kid other than his childhood best friend. Had things gone well, there was the slightest chance that he would have ended up pregnant at twenty-two with the man of his dreams at his side and a pleasant future smiling at them both. Then he wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his life explaining that his child wasn’t an accident, but a surprise that happened earlier in their life than they had intended.

He had spent a lot of time over the past couple of weeks daydreaming instead of continuing on with the plan that he and Klaus had made.

Once the door clicked shut and signified that they were really as alone as they could in the dorm block, Viktor took a deep breath to steady his nerves. His nausea had been playing up since his best friend had sat down next to him in the canteen to let him know that he had to get started on the plan or it was never going to happen. “I’m pregnant, Allison.”

“With Luther’s kid?” she gasped, her eyes widening big enough that they were basically consuming her entire face.

“What? NO!” he shouted immediately. She had been right about him and Luther only having one real interaction with each other. It had been when they were Freshman and Allison was still playing the will-they-won’t-they game with him like she had done with a string of men during that year. They had gotten hostile with each other, which had been the deciding factor for the relationship that it wasn’t going to be happening. Since then they had both changed and settled out so they could chat when they were in a group together in one of their shared classes and didn’t have to glare at each other in the hallways.

Given that their relationship had started off in such a bad place, it only made sense that Allison would be so flabbergasted at the idea of them putting aside their grudge to the point where they could sleep together and Viktor could conceive. 

He let out a sigh as he began to pull at the ends of his fingers. “The baby is Five’s, his twin brothers. Five is really fucking antisocial so the only way that I can reach out to him is through his brother because the only person that would have his number doesn’t text people,” he groused.

This hadn’t been his original plan, to go through two different people so that he could get the number he needed. However, when he had asked Lila about it she had just laughed and showed off the conversation that she had through Instagram. Viktor had later learned, while complaining about how much she sucked, through Diego that was the only way she talked with anyone. Apparently her adoptive mother was the only person that had her number so that she could handle the notifications differently and avoid accidentally reading a message she wasn’t prepared to reply to.

Viktor felt a little bit guilty as he remmebered that Diego still wasn’t in the loop. The two of them had been closer than he was with Allison because their interests aligned more and they actually spent quality time together. Viktor considered himself to be friends with Allison, of course, but he and Diego had reached the same level that he had with Klaus. To an extent, he supposed, seeing as Klaus knew about the baby while Diego didn’t.

A couple of months ago, he thought that the most complicated part of his life was going to be the transition from college to his first job.

Allison had apparently come to her senses. She toyed with the end of one of her braids as she asked, “Is that why you’ve been acting so weird?”

“Huh?” he asked, intelligently, since he had been so trapped in his own mind that he had lost their place in the conversation.

“The baby. Is that why you and Klaus have been acting so weird?” she reiterated.

Another wave of guilt. “Yeah, I’m sorry. Originally we didn’t want to tell anyone because I wanted Five to be the first person to know other than Klaus. Klaus was there with me when I took the test which is the only reason that he knows. I was going to tell you eventually…”

“Are you keeping it?” she asked next, her eyes flickering around their tiny dorm room apartment.

“I’m not due until well after we graduate, it’s not like I’ve been keeping this from you for months and months. I found out six weeks ago and I’m barely even at the tale end of my first trimester,” he explained. “I just… I’ve been putting this off for as long as I can and now I can’t anymore. We’re graduating in two weeks and I just got my first ultrasound done so I really need to tell Five so that I can give him the chance to be involved in his kid’s life.”

“Do you think he’s going to want to be?” Allison asked. She grabbed her phone from where it had been resting on top of all the books she wasn’t using to study.

Viktor dropped his head down into one of his hands. His feet were already beginning to ache despite how early he was into his pregnancy. He wanted to pass out and ignore his problems until a much, much later date but if he did that then he would have to answer to his best friend. “I have no idea. I’ve had a crush on him since we were freshman and while he’s absolutely gorgeous and very intelligent, he keeps his personal life so guarded that I didn’t even know Luther was his twin until four months ago.”

She laughed and then handed him her phone, open to the contact that he needed. He pulled out his own phone and then copied the information he needed before he handed it back to her. “Thank you for helping me with this, Allison.”

“Of course. What kind of asshole would I be if I stopped you from getting into contact with your baby daddy?” she laughed as she dropped her phone back down onto the table.

Viktor cringed, “Don’t ever say that to me again.”

Another laugh as she pulled him into a hug. It felt nice to be in the comforting embrace of another one of his friends, confirmed that they didn’t hate him for the slip up in judgment that he had that resulted in a life changing consequence. 

Allison kissed the top of his head and then said, “But I am going to be the type of asshole to kick you out of your own apartment. I want my boyfriend back here, so you have to scoot.”

---

Klaus’ dorm was very different from Viktor’s. Instead of being what was essentially a mini-apartment that his mother had helped him pay for, it was a standard cinderblock room. Klaus had managed to drive away every single roommate that he had ever had to the point where the administrators had given up trying to room him with anyone. That meant that he had pushed both of the single beds together and stretched a custom-altered queen-sized sheet over the mattresses to give himself a larger bed. His walls were cluttered with posters and overdue assignments, the ceiling stained from when he had been chain smoking cigarettes when they were sophomores (his mother had gotten so upset at him for it that he had quit almost immediately after she found out). His floor was littered with washed and unwashed laundry, more assignments, and enough baggies of weed to kill a large badger.

The weed was remaining unsmoked this time, though they had shared a joint or two every other time that they had been in his dorm. There wasn’t a lot of research about what marijuana would do to an unborn fetus since it had been criminalized for so long, but Viktor knew that smoking was bad so he assumed that he should just avoid the whole fiasco altogether.

He was spread out on top of Klaus’ bed after shoving the laundry that took up a fourth of it onto the ground. He was sitting with his legs crossed and his back propped up against the pillows with one hand pressed to where his child was steadily growing. He had his phone in the other hand, typing awkwardly with only one thumb.

“This entire thing feels so weird,” he muttered.

“That’s like the thousandth time you’ve said that since it all began. We get it, being pregnant is like totally bonkers,” Klaus teased.

He stopped when Viktor sent him a look, obviously not in the mood for that kind of thing. “Klaus, you know that this is really stressing me out. What if Luther and Five turn out to be total assholes? I know that his relationship with that theoretical physicist undergrad has changed Luther or whatever but we’ve ended up snarling at each other every time that we’ve had a long conversation other than once. Now I’m asking him for his brother’s number because I’m carrying his nibling! That’s fucking insane.”

“You’re right, it is weird. But Luther isn’t an asshole anymore. Sloane really made him change who he was and realize that the world didn’t revolve around him. Five is just weird in general,” Klaus shrugged. “Here, read me what you’ve got so far.”

“I just said: ‘Hey, this is Viktor from Mythology and History. I know we’re not super close but I need a favor and you’re the only person left that I can ask’. Which, I know, is super cryptic and not really the best way to start the conversation but I already sent it,” he grumbled.

“If you already sent it and it’s a text then there’s nothing you can do about it. You’ve just gotta learn to roll with the flow, Vik! Everything is gonna turn out okay in the end, you know that. We’re gonna raise this baby together as the best village a kid could ever ask for regardless of whether or not Five wants to be involved in their life,” he soothed. He had given Viktor that speech throughout the entire process of his pregnancy so far. Every step of their plan had felt like scaling an entire mountain in one go, overwhelming and nearly impossible.

Viktor was glad that he had Klaus by his side because if he hadn’t, he probably wouldn’t have even gotten as far as he had. “I know, thanks,” he grasped his best friend’s hand and gave it a light squeeze. Klaus was laying with his back pressed to the edge of the bedframe and his head tilted backwards so that he could look at Viktor while they were talking. When they weren’t, he was facing forward and doing a rather crude sketch of their teacher for a last-minute assignment he had neglected.

The pregnant musician jumped when his phone sounded to let him know that he had gotten another text. He relayed it to Klaus as he read it, “‘Hey Viktor, Allison let me know that you got my number from her earlier. What did you need?’ Klaus, what do I even say to that? Do I explain why I need his brother’s number or do I just ask for it?”

“Just ask for it. I never give an explanation even after I’ve been prompted to do so,” he smirked.

That got a little laugh out of him, which drained some of the tension from the surrounding room. He sent off the message requesting the other man’s number. Luther sent him a question mark and then the number before asking him what it was about. Viktor tried to assuage any worry or confusion he had by promising that he would explain it later.

He set up the contact for Five with shaking hands before he sent a message eerily similar to the one that he had just sent the other twin. “Here, this is what I have so far: ‘Hey, my name is Viktor. We met at a party a couple of months ago and I need to talk to you about something very important. Do you have a time/place we could meet up?’”

“From a logical stand point that is a very good message, however, I think that it would be a lot funnier if you said that you had something of his,” Klaus grinned.

“The baby is not a possession to be owned,” Viktor bit out immediately afterwards. His own father had tried that when attempting to get custody of Viktor when he was younger, which of course had not passed in the American court of law.

He sent off the message and then collapsed down onto the bed as he waited for a reply. He got one pretty quickly afterwards, simply giving him a dorm block number and a time. “I guess I’m going to be revealing the fact that I’m carrying my long-term crushes baby to him in a week.”

Klaus flipped around and then snatched the phone back from him to look it over. “Man, he didn’t even say hi back. Do you want me to come with you or are you gonna be good?”

“I think that I should be okay to do the whole meeting with just the two of us. Having you there might be awkward. Will you walk me there?” Viktor asked hopefully.

“Of course,” Klaus easily promised.

---

A week before graduation and a week into his second trimester with a pregnancy he had never expected to carry, Viktor and Klaus were wandering down the complicated sidewalks of their college campus to try and find a specific address. The GPS that they were using was very upset that they weren’t on the road, despite the fact that they were not in a car and had to be on the sidewalk. They had been going in relative silence as Viktor rehearsed things that he could say to Five once the time actually came over and over again in his head.

They were finally told that they had arrived at their destination in front of a tall dorm block next to a frat house. It was one of the cleaner frat houses on campus, without the trash littering the yard and generally pleasant looking people milling about in the front. The dorm block itself was nearly twenty stories and painted the same gentle purple as the schools’ overall color scheme. It was well kept on the outside and completely devoid of people coming in and out of it. That wasn’t as rare as it would have been earlier in the year since everyone was so close to graduating that they either wanted to catch up on sleep, had to study, or didn’t even want to be on campus more than they absolutely had to.

Viktor paused and looked to the top floor as if that would somehow help him feel more steady with what he was going to have to do. He had barely slept the night before because he had been so anxious about what the next day would entail. 

He snapped out of his thoughts again when Klaus placed a hand on his best friend’s shoulder, “You sure that you’re going to be okay? You know, doing this alone?”

“I don’t think that it’s going to have the same punch if I have someone there while I explain that he knocked me up,” he muttered. He ran a hand through his bangs to try and right them. When he had gotten up earlier that morning they had refused to lay flat, the dark chocolate locks already growing thicker and wilder than they ever had before in his life. His nails had also begun to grow quicker and gotten thicker, which was apparently a symptom of pregnancy no one online bothered to talk about.

Klaus didn’t seem so convinced. He wrapped Viktor up in a hug and while kissing the top of his head said, “If anything gets weird or bad you tell me right away and I’ll force Ben to come and check on you with me.”

Viktor laughed, his troubles melting away in the safety of his best friend’s arms. “You know that I will. You’re going to be the first person after Five to know how it all went down. And if it goes bad you better be prepared to pick up the pieces because I can only manage one person at a time and right now that means baby is my responsibility.”

“I know,” he chuckled as he pressed another kiss to the top of his head. “Now go. Actually tell him or there will be Hell to pay from me!”

The smaller man laughed and waved him off as he began towards the dorm block. He walked through the front door and then to the elevator at the back of the long hallway. There was a bulletin board inside that had a myriad of different declarations, such as when the graduation party was going to be, that someone was offering guitar lessons, when quiet hours were (that one had been scribbled over with a myriad of different colors to give each person their own quiet hours), a petition to make the dorm animal-friendly, and half of an essay that had a large boot print in the middle.

The elevator ride up to the floor that he had been given was slow and wobbly, since nothing in any of the dorm blocks was ever great. The one where Five lived was a little bit cleaner and tidier in the halls than the one where Viktor lived with Allison and leagues better than Klaus’. 

The anxiety that he had been fighting with since early in the evening the day before had returned with a vengeance. It was sitting like a massive pit in his stomach, eating away at his insides until all he could feel was nausea. His hands were shaky as he stepped out of the elevator, forced to release the metal bar that had been there to help people stabilize during the jerky movements. His stomach clenched around the single mini-muffin that he had been able to shove into himself for breakfast. His lungs choked on the air that he was breathing and helped spread the anxiety around his body.

He was able to force himself forward so that he was slowly stalking down the hall. He didn’t know if the queasiness roiling in the back of his throat was because of the pregnancy or his anxiety, but he was ignoring it as best he could to focus instead on his mission.

He stopped in front of the door number that he had been given and rose his hand to knock. After he did, he closed his eyes and breathed a few times to calm himself down. The silence stretched on for thirty seconds before the door finally opened, and towards the end of his wait Viktor had begun to suspect that he had been tricked and that wasn’t actually Five’s dorm.

The door opened and Luther was standing in front of him, all at once. That had confirmed that he was at least at a place that could bring him to the man he really needed to talk to. He didn’t want to have to ask Luther for that kind of help again since it would almost definitely involve him explaining the pregnancy to another person before he did it to Five, but that didn’t seem to be the case.

“Uh, sorry, he’s inside. I’ll just step out and give the two of you some privacy,” he said awkwardly. He shuffled past Viktor and out into the hallway. It was odd to have someone with Luther’s bulk and height act like he was the ticking time bomb when Viktor struggled to push five feet tall and had always been awkwardly gangly.

“Thanks,” he gave an uncomfortable smile of his own. Once Luther had gotten fully out of the way, he inched past the slightly-closed door and into the dorm.

The apartment was just as nice on the inside as the block had been on the outside. There was a dining space and a small kitchen that actually had some counter space and a one-burner stovetop. The floor was hardwood, or at least a lookalike, and the walls were painted white with several classy paintings hung tastefully around the space. There were three doors on the wall opposite the kitchen space, one of which was open to reveal a neat little bathroom with chipper white tile along the walls and the floor. The other two doors were shut, though one of them opened to reveal the man that Viktor had spent the last week trying to chase down.

The violinist shut the door behind him so that they had some semblance of privacy while surrounded by strangers that probably had nothing better to do than listen in on their conversation, despite the hallways of the dorm block being mostly empty when Viktor was traveling through them.

“Hey,” he said awkwardly as he walked further into the apartment. He had his hands out in front of himself and was running the edge of his thumb nail over the callouses on the tips of his fingers to try and avoid the impulse to pull out the ultrasound in his pocket to play with that instead.

“Hello,” Five greeted rather tersely. He shut the door to his bedroom behind him and then walked over to the dining table in the center of the room. It was there where couches and chairs, or even bean bags and pillows on the ground, should have been. Viktor guessed that it was more conducive to the kind of studying that a future mathematician was going to have to do.

“I know that this is, uh, awkward and you probably don’t even remember who I am, but,” he paused for a second as he tried to find the right words. In his mind it sounded like was lying because he couldn’t even get through a single sentence without tripping over himself like some kind of child.

What was said next surprised him, to the point where his entire mind lost what he was trying to figure out how to say entirely. “I know who you are,” Five smiled. It looked a little awkward on his face, like he was somehow inherently more suited to scowling, but he was so handsome that Viktor almost swooned on the spot. 

“You do?” he felt his face beginning to flush.

“Of course I do,” he nodded. “But I shouldn’t have interrupted you, go on.”

They were sitting down at the dining table at that point, across from each other like what was happening was some sort of strange business transaction instead of the most life-changing news Viktor was ever going to have to tell someone. It felt like a bigger deal than when he had told his mother he was trans.

“So, we met up at a party a while ago. Um, I don’t usually go to parties so I don’t have anything to define it by but we… slept together,” Viktor explained awkwardly. He reached into the pocket of his jacket and then pulled out the ultrasound as he set it down on the table, “I’m pregnant.”

Five was silent as he reached over and picked up the singular piece of paper. He held it to his face, his brow furrowing together and his already surly eyes becoming even more intense as he scrutinized the mess of black and white blobs for something Viktor couldn’t even name.

“I see,” he replied as he sat the photo back down on the table at the half way point between them. All of the joy that he had carried upon seeing Viktor was gone, hidden behind emotions that the violinist couldn’t even dream of reading.

He took the ultrasound back and then began on a nervous spiel that had been trying to force its way out of his mouth the entire time that he was watching Five study their unborn child. “I don’t expect you to be involved at all. I wanted to let you know because you deserve to have a say if you want one, but technically part of that say is deciding that you don’t. I’m not going to get an abortion since this is my body and I get to decide what medical procedures I do and do not want done. But I also thought that you deserved to know that you had a kid running around somewhere in the world even if you don’t want anything to do with us. Which I’m not saying that you will want, because I wouldn’t really want that if I had the kind of career ideas that people say you do. Um, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I wanted you to know that our genetics are going to be running around as a kid but I’m not expecting even child support, so, uh, yeah.”

After he finished speaking, Five sat there for a moment while blinking. His face was still a unreadable mask and his eyes were still storming with thoughts. Viktor wondered, just for a moment, if that was what he always looked like when he was thinking or if it was unique to their situation because of the bomb that Viktor had just dropped on him.

“And you’re sure that the baby is mine?” Five asked, something akin to hope glimmering in the back of his tone.

“I don’t get out that much,” Viktor nodded. “The party thing was a fluke and I made a bunch of decisions I probably should have been more cautious about. So not only does the timing add up, it’s kind of impossible to get pregnant from a guy you slept with six months ago.”

“Right,” Five nodded. He sat back in his chair and then ran his hand through his hair, displacing the locks so that they hung messily down around his forehead.

He shook his head and then looked back up at Viktor, his eyes cleared but his face still contorted with stress. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to insinuate anything about you. I just didn’t realize that this was a thing that could happen to me.”

“I didn’t think that it was something that could happen to me either, I’m usually really careful. But it did,” he shrugged awkwardly.

“I’m not upset about this, by the way. I don’t blame you and I don’t think you’re trying to trap me. I’m willing to help you in any way that you see fit,” Five said. “I can pay you child support, co-parent, have limited custody. Whatever works best for you.”

Viktor fidgeted as he tried to get the words out in a coherent way, despite the jumble of thoughts rushing through his mind. He was still in love with Five the same way that he had been when he was a dumb teenager spotting him across the hall during their orientation. His heart still fluttered at the thought of being near him again and his stomach still flipped at the proximity from even across the table. He was having a baby with someone that he was head over heels in love with, the kind of love that made his heart ache in his chest and his skin feel red hot, but not in the way that he had hoped.

“I want you to be involved in their life, like actually involved. My dad was really absent and it fucked me up. So if you’re going to do this then you really need to do this. You can’t decide that you don’t want to halfway through and then give them abandonment issues,” Viktor said seriously. It was hard to toss away the puppy dog feelings bubbling up in his chest but he had to worry about his child over his own feelings and emotions.

Five barked out a laugh and then looked embarrassed. “I apologize, I wasn’t laughing at you. Child abandonment isn’t something that my mothers would ever allow me to do. Even if I didn’t want to be a parent, which I do, there would be a chance that they would force me into some level of it anyway. Just to make sure that you and the baby would be supported, of course. They respect my bodily autonomy and choices with my life.”

“Okay,” Viktor nodded, feeling suddenly very overwhelmed with the whole ordeal. “So we can talk more about what we want co-parenting to look like in the future, we’ve got another two trimesters to get to before we’re there. And I need a nap.”

“Would you like me to walk you back to your dorm?”

“No, thank you,” he flushed. The idea of being led back to his home was something that he had dreamed about on that fateful night of conception, but this would be a lot different than that. For one, it was the middle of the day. He was also already pregnant with Five’s child and the two of them probably weren’t going to be having any chemistry because of that. “My best friend is waiting outside because he didn’t trust me to not just turn and run. I’ll let you know when the next appointment is if you’d like to join me for that, though.”

“I would love to. And I would also like to request a copy of the ultrasound if at all possible,” Five smiled warmly. It made Viktor’s insides feel gooey and like he was going to melt on the spot.

“I can do that,” Viktor nodded confidently. “I’ll see you later, then.”

“Right, yeah,” he sprang up from the table while nodding. He walked over to the door and then opened it for Viktor, which resulted in them having another awkward set of goodbyes at the front of the dormroom where neither of them were sure what level of a relationship they were on with each other. 

Finally, Viktor was back down on the ground floor and texted Klaus to come and get him so they could walk home. He refused to give any details other than the fact that it went well, but forced his best friend to cuddle with him while he napped off the stresses of the day and night before.

[hi-im-dazey]

These are all great suggestions, and I would like to add a few...

If your campus allows them, invest in a Kick Scooter. (most won't allow electric ones, so get a human powered one) It'll fold up nice and portable, and be a lifesaver when your classes are on opposite corners of the campus and you only have five minutes to get there between, especially important if you minor is not in the same college as you major, or your GE classed happen in a another part of the campus from your major. (get a helmet, and if anyone mocks you for it, point out you still have to pay off your student loans even if an accident smashes your education out of your skull)

Buy a selection of test booklets and scantron sheets, like seriously get a pack of every size first day of the semester, some universities will hand out free ones and #2 pencils during midterms and finals, but not always. The upside to this is even if you only end up using a few yourself, there will always be AT LEAST one person who forgot, did not see or have time to run to kiosk for freebies... .etc., and this person will almost always be desperate enough to slip you a few bucks for one of your spares. I literally ate on someone else's dime all of finals week every semester because I bought packs of scantrons and test booklets. And the packs don't cost very much at all, I made my investment back after the first final.

Universities will have blue light phones. Use them. These will help you stay safe. The rules for when you can use them will differ by school, but usually they can give you golf cart rides to your car or the bus stop if you are disabled, or escort you to your transportation or dorm if it's after dark. This is especially important if you attend a State University, because these are, by law, public property and while randos can't get into the buildings, they can roam the campus, and unless they do something illegal there's not a whole lot the campus police can do about it. Don't be the illegal thing they do, watch your back.

Look up the Finals schedule. BEFORE CLASSES START. Universities have a system based on when the course is scheduled during the semester for deciding when the final will be, to make sure people do not end up with two finals at the same time slot. Your final most likely will NOT be the same time/day as the class was. This information is on the website for your university, add it to your calendar.

Use dead day to actually not study. Give your brain a rest, get a good nights' sleep. Dead day is meant to be a break before finals, if you paid attention and did the work and studied during the semester, you should not be stressing about finals. Have a good breakfast, take a walk get some fresh air. watch some crappy brain candy. Take a nice hot shower, get to bed early. Do NOT study on Dead Day.

Take advantage of freebies. Transit cards are often free, every department will have resources, like a special collection librarian specific to your focus of study, if you are the first generation of your family to attend a four year (or a two year) look into joining the EOP, it's extra money each semester, and a few free meals a month, plus extra counseling and a dedicated study area. Use the holy heck out of your student discount, a lot of companies will give you free and discount stuff with a valid student email address or student ID card.

Also gonna stress, READ THE SYLLABUS, transfer important dates to your calendar, if something isn't clear on the syllabus, email the professor for clarification, even if class hasn't started yet. Don't assume it will be clarified without asking. Professors sometimes make an "adjust the dates for the new semester" pass at an older syllabus, and that's all. They often miss things or get the dates wrong. If something isn't clear, ask about it.

Actual good first-time college student advice:

Wear jeans/pants that “breathe” and bring a sweater, even if it’s scorching hot out, until you know which building blasts the AC to 60 degrees F and which feels like a sauna

Backpacks with thick straps are your friend!  Messenger bags are cool and all but if you’re commuting with a lot of stuff, symmetrically styled backpacks are better for your back

You are your own person and you can walk out whenever you need to or want to, so long as you’re not disrupting the class.  Meaning you can go to the bathroom without permission, take a breather if you’re anxious, answer an important phone call, etc.

If you don’t like the class on the first day, if you can- DROP THAT CLASS AND TAKE ANOTHER ONE!  It’ll only get worse from there!

If you can, take a class outside your major; it’s a good break from your expected studies.

You are in charge of your schedule.  Your adviser and guidance counselor is there to ‘advise and guide’ but if you don’t like certain classes and you can substitute for others, that’s your choice.

Consequently, if you are changing anything drastic in your plan, talk with your adviser and instructors.

Pay attention to your credit hours and grades.  Never leave this to the last week of school, you will be sorry and stressed beyond belief!

Unless it’s a lab book or otherwise specified, go to the class for a week or so before buying an expensive textbook.  Some classes, while having it on their required list, do not actually use the textbook a whole lot and you might find some of it scanned online.  Rent if you can or buy used online (schools actually don’t give discounts).  Use your best judgement on what you think you need.

Tell the people who go up to you selling or advertising things you are not interested in that you are in a rush to class and don’t have time to listen to them.  It’s less rude and they’ll leave you alone.

The smaller the class, the better it is to have some sort of acquaintanceship with a couple classmates.  They might save your ass if you are absent one day or need to study.  And talking with them makes the time go by faster without it being so insufferable.

You don’t need to join a club or sport, but internships are cool and useful!

If you can afford it, take a day off once or twice each semester if you’re too exhausted.  Just be aware of what you missed and if it was worth missing!

Your health is the most important, this goes for mental health too!!  Note: College-age/upper teens is when mental disorders like depression and anxiety are most commonly diagnosed.  Most schools have therapy services, especially during exam time.  Look into it if you need to!

Communicate with your professor if you are having trouble with something.  Anything.

Eat and stay hydrated.  Bring a water bottle and snack to class.

All-nighters will happen but never go over 36 hours without sleep.

It’s going to be hard and there will be times you might think about giving up.  This WILL happen.  You just have to make sure what you’re doing isn’t making you absolutely miserable and/or there is something rewarding and positive to look forward to at the end!

[luke-r-gillespie]

May 10 - Farming Activity

Freewriting

Today started a little earlier than usual, with me waking up around 6:30 to get ready for breakfast at 7. After a quick breakfast, I boarded a coach bus with the rest of the class to begin the two and a half hour journey through Tokyo's rush hour traffic (to travel an astounding eighteen miles.) We had class on the shuttle, which was a nice change of pace from the usual conference room and it helped to pass some time during the first leg of our drive. Over the course of the drive I saw some pretty cool sights, parts of Tokyo that I had never seen before, robust housing districts, and even mount Fuji! After the two and a half hour drive, we arrived at our destination, a small town outside of Tokyo where we would be farming on a rice paddy.

In order to work in the water logged rice paddy, we had to remove our shoes and put on two pairs of socks (one of which I purchased at a convenience store the night prior, and both of which I threw out after we were done farming.) After receiving twenty rice sprouts and watching a Japanese farmer's demonstration, I stepped into the cold muddy water and began planting (so, so much mud.) After getting past how mud caked my feet were and having a few close calls where I nearly fell directly in, I made light work of planting my twenty sprouts and went back for more. After planting another thirty or so, the class and I had finished cultivating our paddy and headed down to the park's stream to wash our feet (and dispose of our socks.) With clean feet and my shoes back on, I ate the sandwich that I bought at the convenience store the previous night. With thirty minutes remaining before the coach bus was coming back to pick us up, I explored the farming park (this park was a location featured in the popular Studio Ghibli Film, My Neighbor Totoro!)

Riding the bus back to Hotel Edoya, I listened to music to pass the time on the much shorter return journey. Once back, I finished putting my now dry laundry away before setting out into Akihabara with Zachary, Griffin, Noah, and Rich. We had dinner at a nice curry spot after exploring the city. Following dinner, I returned to hotel Edoya where I now write my blog (I'm writing it slightly earlier tonight because I am headed to down town Shinjuku tonight to hit some bars with some friends!)

Academic Reflection

Rice farming in Japan is an important but declining industry. With younger generations opting to look for more fulfilling work in the city, Japan's rice farming workforce is made up of the elderly who struggle to complete the intensive manual labor required for farming rice (take my word for it, its not for the faint of heart.) Rice is of critical importance to the Japanese diet, with it being consumed with most meals and being an important source of carbohydrates. Rice is a far more efficient crop than many of the alternatives available in Japan, at least historically. Rice was first introduced to Japan by the Koreans alongside important agricultural advancements needed to efficiently cultivate the rice. Rice's success in Japan allowed for populations to grow as a stable food source that provided sufficient nourishment became widely available. Unfortunately, the advent of rice in Japan, brought diseases from the west that wiped out what experts believe to have been between 25-30% of Japan's population at the time. Since then, Japan has obviously recovered but the country still only produces around 30% of their own food, importing the remaining 70% from other nations.

[justatalkingface]

I'm rather salty about the class 1a vs. Izuku and the aftermath.

Because to me all that arc showed was that only Uraraka, Iida and Bakugou are important to Izuku, meaning that they were the only ones who at the end of the day got through to Izuku. I mean who else got big moments like them. The answer is no one else.

Okay, maybe it's too much to ask of Horikoshi to give meaningful moments for of all of class 1a. But you know there is one other person I wanted to get big moment, but didn't receive. It was Shoto.

I'm just so mad that Shoto, who always supported Izuku unconditionally, more than anyone else in class 1a, didn't get any recognition. Did Horikoshi have to ignore the friendship that he created between him and Shoto to create this arc? He just completely destroyed any hope or expectations that I had in the manga to be honest.

Am I just frustrated over nothing because it seems no one cares?

Oh, you're not the only one upset about how 1A is being treated. Someone posted recently that Kaminari is one of the favorite characters, but his last big significant moment is what, War Arc? And before him being used for only his Quirk... when was he relevant again? Once the power levels started shooting up, the 'elite' 1A (who's Quriks had to be set up before the power cap was set so damn high) has been less and less relevant as the story continued, and they became less able to compete in the big leagues the story was focusing on.

The thing that comes up with that clusterfuck, beyond how badly it treats Izuku, is how badly it treats 1A as a whole, minus Bakugou, of course. They were there as nothing more than Bakugou's backup, and all their actions just served his agenda, not their own thoughts or feelings. They just... blindly agreed, because.... reasons. Yeah.

Shoto, of course, is also being done wrong, but it's worse on him because he was a main character, but now he's just a part of other people's stories.

When we first met Shoto, Endeavour was involved with him, obviously, but the dynamic was Endeavour was a part of Shoto's story. Endeavour was relevant because how he affected Shoto.

After Endeavour became the Number One Hero, though, it started switching around, and Shoto was sidelined to focus more and more on Endeavour. He featured in that story, sure, but it was as a part of Endeavour's story, not his own. Shoto was, instead of being relevant on his own merits, became relevant because how he affected Endeavour, which only got worse over time as his acceptance of his father was more or less tactly stated as fact, even if it was never said, and so Endeavour's story could focus on Dabi more as part of his development.

Here's where it starts diverging from Izuku, though. Originally, Izuku talked some sense into him, and so they became friends, right? As time passed, though, they spent less and less time interacting on screen, and when Shoto was on screen with him? Even then, more and more of that time was about Endeavour.

They interacted when they interned with Endeavour together. When they ate a meal at Todoroki's house, it was about pushing Endeavour's story, how Todoroki felt about Endeavour, not Izuku, and worse yet Izuku ended up supporting Endeavour's redemption as part of Shoto's 'realization' of that fact he wanted to forgive his father.

So, on one end, his connection with Izuku as a friend got less focus, less screen time spent with the two of them together and they, in the author's views of them anyways, started becoming less important by dint of them just being together less, and less time of that time was spent as friends and more as working towards part of a greater objective, while on the other end, he started getting more and more assimilated as a character in Endeavour's story, not allowed to stand on his own, go his own way.

These two factors carved away at, not even their friendship, but how relevant their friendship was to Shoto and Izuku as characters, as both of them focused on different things.

Then, you know, my favorite phrase becomes relevant yet again: Everything Changed When The War Arc Attacked.

Because Post War, characters aren't relevant for their friendships, just their value for the plot, for moving Hori's agenda to the end as fast as possible, because he doesn't want to flesh out anything beyond the most basic necessities. And at this point, for the greater plot, Shoto only exists as part of Dabi and Endeavour story. So of course, under that logic, he's not a big focus when it's about Izuku. Ochako is part of Izuku's plot, as much as anyone not named Bakugou is, only in so much as she's still somewhat hinted as Izuku's future love interest, but by and by large, Izuku, or rather Deku, has moved beyond 1A, beyond friendships, and what remains of his friendship with Shoto isn't important enough to get even a brief nod too.

Hori didn't need to do this, is the thing. This is just the quickest, easiest option for him.

So... sorry to say, but I'd keep your expectations low about Shoto's future if I was you; he's already had his big fight with Dabi, and now it's Endeavour's turn, and maybe they'll fight him together, sure, but that'll be it. And after that, what purpose is he going to serve in the narrative? It's all going to be downhill for him from here.

[luveline]

a special friend, part two [Fred Weasley, George Weasley x reader]

tags: reader-insert, platonic relationships, friendship, can be read as romantic for either or both, hurt/comfort, mental health issues, implied/referenced self-harm, dissociation, quiet reader, shy reader, sad reader

relationships: fred weasley x reader, george weasley x reader

wordcount: 3.2k

read part one here

The common room was always so clean. The house-elves must work themselves half to death with effort, as you never saw a hair or speck of dust where there ought not to be one. The small refreshment table filled and refilled through every new day and the fireplace was always roaring on cold winter nights. It was especially cold that evening, and so the members of Gryffindor house benefited from a crackling fire and hot chocolate coming out of the ears.

You basked in the warmth of the flame, sitting cross-legged before it. A cup of hot chocolate cooled in between your hands, which were both laden with bandaids and germolene. Fred and George’s orders, of course. You were not to scratch, bite or mess in any detrimental way with your hands, arms or skin. If you did, you were to report to them for immediate bandaging.

At first, they’d simply been spelling each wound away. This had an opposite effect, as the freshly healed skin was perfect for picking whenever your mood turned - which was often. You found yourself blinded and basked in the light of being cared for by others, and although you may have preferred complete autonomy over your own body, you couldn’t say you minded the attentiveness of the twins. They’d made it their personal mission to prevent any self-harm, accidental or purposeful. You weren’t sure you even knew the difference half the time.

A quiet had settled over the room. It seemed as though each red and gold student was content to breathe in the smell of chestnut and pine in peaceful, companionable silence. You found yourself smiling kindly at each person who looked your way. You couldn’t imagine having done that before you had become acquainted with the twins.

Acquainted was a word you used to protect yourself. Friendly was too confident, too firm. You sometimes dreamt of horror stories where you, confident and comfortable, admitted how much you cared for them. In these dreams, they laughed in your face. Poked fun at your hope.

Of course, Fred and George weren’t cruel. If they felt that way, they certainly wouldn’t rub it in your face or make you feel embarrassed about it. But some shame never went away, and you carried it like an ever-burning torch.

Despite the pleasant warmth of the room, chills racked your spine at the thought. You pushed it from your head, attempting to think of anything else. You traced a pattern through the braided strands of the rug you were lazing upon, first the flames of a bonfire towering ten feet tall, then a mirror of the powdered sugar landscape outside.

Two warm bodies settled in the carpet on either side of you. A long arm wrapped around your shoulders confidently. The floral scent of your perfume mingled with the strong scent of burning caramel and something woody, the signature fragrance of the Weasley twins.

George moved first, plonking a stuffed toy into your lap. He positioned the neck carefully so that the teddy bear was sat as comfortable as you were.

“For you,” said Fred.

“An early Christmas gift,” George added.

The bear was spotted unusually like some sort of hybrid creature. You wondered where they could possibly have acquired such an artefact.

“We saw him and thought of you,” they said together.

That was rich. And maybe correct. After all, it was a weird looking plushie and you weren’t exactly renowned for your normality. You didn’t say much, simply handing off your cold drink to George without so much as a sideways glance and brought the bear to your face. You grazed your nose against its brown stomach and inhaled, breathing in its clean scent.

Both twins were used to the general quietness that came with your presence and didn’t pressure any response. You knew you should’ve said thank you, or even smiled gratefully, but you just couldn’t make your mouth move the way you wanted. You placed your hand on each brothers leg and applied the barest amount of pressure, hoping it showed gratitude.

“Well, I’m starving.”

“I’m so glad you said so, my brother.”

“Yes, I’m craving something savory, Gred.”

“Something juicy, Forge.”

“Such as?”

You looked between them like a muggle attending a tennis match, back and forth and back and forth. They ran circles around you for their own enjoyment, you assumed, but maybe also to make you feel more included.

“Y/N, fancy a trek to the kitchens?”

Before you could say no, or yes, or make up your mind and decide what it was you wanted to do, your stomach growled. Fred grinned wickedly.

They ushered you out of the portrait hole and down the stairs without preamble, flanking your sides like bodyguards. You didn’t mind, taking time to smile at the castle ghosts and portraits as you went.

The twins shot each other looks when they thought you couldn’t see. One said, how do you think she is? Another said, I think she’s however you think she is. Both said, she seems okay today.

It would feel a little patronizing if it weren’t so foreign - to have people care about your well-being so deeply they made changes to their day to see you and went out of their way to make you feel good; you’d find it condescending if it wasn’t so delightful.

That is to say, you felt conflicted. Happy that somebody cared, ashamed that they also felt concerned. They worried over everything these days, what you ate and what classes you had and oh, ghostie, do you need help with that? Y/N, sweetheart, let me carry that for you, lest your arms grow too tired.

It was… nice. It was nice, even if it was painful. Sometimes, it reminded you why you didn’t allow yourself the pleasure of friendship in the first place.

You hummed to yourself. Making sound had become a little easier. You weren’t inclined to say a whole lot, but allowing yourself to be louder, to take up space, had come easier the longer you spent with them. Neither Fred nor George minded if you huffed after too many stairs or if you clicked gobstones together at the foot of their beds.

The song was one of those cheesy Christmas numbers you’d heard on the radio. It was warm and comforting, bringing tears to your eyes if you thought about it too much. George slipped into song with you easily, humming much more loudly and obnoxiously. Fred just grinned to himself, keeping dutiful watch of the corridors.

You bubbled like a shaken can of coke by the time you arrived at the painting that enclosed the kitchen doorway, feeling too happy for your own good. Despite feeling very hungry, not a lick of fatigue or unhappiness tinged your mood, though the fuzzy numbness of every day threatened your well-being if you stopped to think too long.

The door swung open obediently after your half-hearted tickle insisted upon by the boys.

“What do you feel like, Y/N, sweet or savoury? There’s bound to be something you’ll fancy,” George said.

You held in a grimace. There were lots of things you wanted to try, the kitchens smelled like so many amazing things. The cloying smells of jam and treacle and custard, the hearty scents of gravy and roast dinner. It was too bad, then, that most everything you ate tasted stale. For years, your tastebuds had been slacking. During your worst days, food held no taste at all, resulting in your decreased appetite.

A tingling began in your fingers. You didn’t know what to say, or how to say it, how to convey that you didn’t really feel up to anything at all. You knew they would protest as they always did when you didn’t eat.

“Bread,” you managed. Bread was a safe choice. Dense enough to feel filling, easy to keep down, and bland to begin with.

Both boys were frowning but trying not to at your choice.

George moved forward, catching the attention of a harrowed looking house elf. They conversed with familiarity and soon you were being beckoned to a table that was relatively clear. Within minutes you were surrounded by bread, crusty rolls and sliced sourdough.

George casually nudged a bowl of tomato soup in your direction.

The surface shined with grease. It even had a swirl of cream and a sprig of basil afloat.

He looked at you, eyes pleading.

“You too,” you said.

This appeased him. The boys sat across from you with their own bowls, eating in the horrific way that teenage boys do. By the time they’d finished, you’d managed half of your own meal and two slices of bread. The nausea you experienced from just existing was starting to build, accompanied by the disappointment of your bland meal. You’d hoped an improved mood would help your appetite, but you still felt unsatisfied.

The boys grabbed a passing plate of tarts and ice cream.

Your good mood was wearing thin. You bit down on the tip of your thumb and stared at the grain of the table.

You bit down harder.

“Hey. Hey! Don’t do that,” Fred said, reaching forward as if to grab your hand. You pushed it under the table.

George pushed the plate of confectionary closer to you. “Chew on one of these instead, hm?”

You took it all back - this was patronising. Lovely and thoughtful and very, excruciatingly patronising.

You didn’t want to say no, or push it away, or eat anything else or even laugh it off. You wanted to do nothing. You lay your head down on the table, closing your eyes. You caught a murmur or two between them, though you couldn’t make out the words with your ear pressed so hard against the wood and the other covered by your falling hair. The table was smooth and cool under your skin.

A chair scraped against the floor. Footsteps. A broad hand against your back.

“You’re like a steam train running out of coal sometimes.”

You knew he was hoping for a response, a joke, a sign you’d been cheered up.

Through slow blinks, you could make out his face. Endlessly amused and a little sad, framed by the candlelight. He was beautiful, you thought absently. They were both beautiful.

“You okay?” he said quietly.

“Mm,”

“Mm? Is mm a yes or a no?”

“Mm,”

“Alright,” he said, rubbing a soothing path up between your shoulder blades and down again. It would’ve been dizzying if you could think straight, it made the numbness a little woozy. You preened beneath his touch like a pleased cat, feeling the unhappiness melt just a little.

It was crazy how affection could make you feel better, even if it didn’t always solve the problem.

Embarrassed, you mumbled, “you’re going to kill me.”

Fred smiled. “How so?”

“You’re fattening me up like a lamb to slaughter.”

He didn’t quite laugh, huffing through his nose. He really was very handsome up close. His hair was curling at just below his ears, a lush auburn colour that complemented his pale, freckle adorned skin. His eyes were a heart-melting brown so that his pupils were lost. The look he gave you was searing like he knew exactly what you were thinking about him. Your ears were tinged with heat, cheeks filling with colour.

He retracted his hand.

“Wrap some of those up, Georgie. Ghostie needs her bed.”

“It shall be done, brother mine!”

You smiled despite yourself.

-

For your birthday, the twins had gifted you a simple necklace. The chain was silver, reaching to just below your collar bone. It had no charm or jewel. It was perfect.

It helped you sometimes when you felt out of it to run it between two fingers or tug it gently from left to right, feeling the chain links rolling behind your neck.

You’d tried that, among every other coping mechanism drilled into your head by George and Fred over the past few weeks. You drew circles were you wanted to scratch, put plasters over fingertips you wanted to pick at. You took big breaths and did the stretches George insisted on. You even tried getting a full night’s sleep - nothing worked.

It filled you with guilt. You felt as though you were letting them both down by struggling.

You stared out the window of the dormitory at the sky, moonlight spilling onto your skin and staining your clothes a gauzy silver. You’d read once that sometimes when the planets were in rotation, you could see them as though they were as close as the moon.

This didn’t seem right to you. How could Mars seem so close? It was an optical illusion. The planets revolved around the sun, but humans had once thought they revolved around Earth instead.

It must’ve been a very strange experience to realise you weren’t as important as you thought. The Earth was just the Earth, spinning and wobbling its path through space.

You shook your head, feeling lost. It was ridiculous to project your feelings on the solar system. But still, you couldn’t help but feel like, despite its inhabitants and its systems, the Earth was so lonely.

Your necklace began to grow cold until it was almost like ice against your skin. One of the twins, or maybe both, had charmed it to change temperature. Cold usually meant, ‘Ghostie, you awake?’

You cringed against the sensation. Why couldn’t they booty call you like normal young men, throwing stones at your window with a boom box? Or, for merlin’s sake, an owl?

You grumbled to yourself, throwing the fleece blanket from your body. You were hardly dressed for company in knickers and a tank top, so you threw on a grey zip-up jacket and a pair of pyjama shorts that were hardly any better than the knickers. Luckily the jacket hung past the shorts. You wanted to care that you were dressed scantily, really, but the boys wouldn’t care and you didn’t have it in you to find something else.

You trekked down the stairs, your trainer socks slippery against the well-worn wood. Fred stretched languidly in front of the fireplace, a pack of exploding snap cards and a mountain of chocolate frogs beside him whilst George was sitting much more straight-backed on the sofa.

“I’m cold,” you said, announcing your arrival. The redheads turned to look at you over their shoulders. Fred rolled his eyes at you and flicked his wand. The necklace slowly heated until it was pleasantly warm against your collarbones.

You clambered over the back of the sofa with little grace, folding your knees underneath you and leaning heavily against George’s arm. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

“If I were a lesser man, I’d ask where your bottoms were, Y/L/N,” said Fred, shuffling the cards dexterously.

You raised your jacket wordlessly, exposing your bottoms.

“Wouldn’t you know, they were there the whole time.”

“You assumed the same as me, George.”

George didn’t reply, though his expression said he was similarly embarrassed.

“And do you always let girls you presume to be half-naked climb all over you?” you asked.

“So talkative,” George chastened.

“Don’t change the subject! I’m interested in the answer,” said Fred.

“Oh shove off! You insufferable tyrants.”

Ah, so he knows how it feels now, you thought. You looked up into his face, the line of his jaw.

You looked down at your legs, feeling fatigued. Smooth stretches of skin and fine hair interrupted only by thin white lines. The low light made them almost impossible to see. They shined like silver when you moved, caught by the light of a nearby candle. They felt a lifetime away now when a young you had used pins and quills and little carving knives to punish yourself for bad behaviour.

You traced a slightly thicker one with a pointed fingernail. You pushed it nastily into the scar, but it didn’t hurt.

You sighed.

Fred and George were half arguing about something you didn’t catch, Fred through a mouthful of chocolate.

It was hard, always being miserable. People often criticized the moody for ruining the mood, but it wasn’t as if you could choose how to be. You wanted to wake each day and be happy and entertaining and absurdly good-natured, like the twins. It was an abject cruelty, then, that every day you woke up and felt the immeasurable dread of continuing on another day. Not even magic could help you with that.

You rejected Fred’s offer to play, happy to sit and watch the boys play. You let yourself slide into the space George had vacated, curling into a tight ball. Your stomach hurt.

Godric, there was always something fucking wrong with you.

You were frustrated. The boys could tell. Their game of snap was stretched thin, and you knew it was your fault. You wrinkled your nose at the smell of singed hair, restless. You squirmed against the warm leather under your skin, feeling sticky and out of sorts.

You closed your eyes against the aching and slept.

You woke up crying.

Fred shifted in his sleep. He was leaning against your legs, his hair and face smushed into the leather beneath you. George was facedown in the carpet. You pressed a hand to your mouth to muffle any sound.

The clock on the wall read 4 minutes past 4 o’clock in the morning. You’d only managed an hour and a half of sleep.

You couldn’t remember what you’d been dreaming. Maybe somewhere familiar. Faces you recognized. It didn’t matter, only the feeling of being crushed by the air. You reached out without thinking, grabbing Fred’s shoulder.

He roused gracelessly, blinking through squinted eyes at you. A hard sob rocked you to the core, the feeling of breathlessness sinking deep into your chest.

“What’s wrong? Are you hurting?”

You couldn’t answer. You grasped for his arm, begging him to do something, to save you. You felt as though you were going to run out of air.

“Hey, you’re alright. You’re okay. Let’s breathe, should we? Breathe with me.” He grabbed the hand you’d pushed over your mouth and brought it to his chest. You could feel him take a huge inhale and you tried your best to replicate it.

“Good! That’s good. You’re doing so well.” Another big breath, a long exhale.

“You feel that? The leather under you.” He grabbed your free hand and put it on the seat. “Feels weird, huh? Dimples and wrinkles.” He dragged your hand over the texture repeatedly.

A big breath.

Eventually, your breathing returned. The crying stayed.

“Don’t cry, ghost.”

You frowned. It was odd to be looking down at Fred instead of up. He pressed your hand tighter to his chest.

“Bad dream?”

“Don’t remember,” you whispered.

“It was just a dream. You’re okay. I promise.”

George snored. Fred rolled his eyes. You laughed through the tears, blinking the last of them away.

“Go back to sleep. I’ll be here.”

You knew he was telling the truth.

[beels-burger-babe]

Beelzebub's Very Bad No Good Day

***So this is the new format in which I'll be answering requests. In my experience, actual posts get spread further than asks do, so this will hopefully help with that. ANYWAY, I am crazy excited about this request as a major Beel simp and YES I will proudly do this request! Thank you @sinnoman for blessing me with it. -B*** Summary: Beel doesn't get anything to eat one day, and it doesn't go well for anybody.

From the moment Beelzebub woke up, he knew that today was going to be a terrible day. For starters, he had apparently raided the fridge in his sleep the night before, so there was not a crumb left in the house for anyone to make breakfast with. Most of the others had gone and grabbed something from Hell's Kitchen on their way to class, but poor Beel had slept through his alarm due to the food coma his nighttime snack had put him in and had to rush to RAD. The entire school was talking about the monster that they believed had awoken beneath the school. Teachers were on edge ready to evacuate the premises for the earthquake they believed to be happening. Beel avoided eye contact, blushing as his empty stomach continued to rumble and roar throughout the day. He ended up eating a few pencils just to get it to quiet down and even that didn't have much effect. The Avatar of Gluttony nearly cried tears of relief when the lunch bell rang. But it seemed that fate was not his friend that day. He was going to order a gargantuan-sized Little Devil mango slushy, a side of Hellfire curry rice, fried shadow bat, and 108 seed salad and the main course of at least twenty shadow hog burgers with three servings of caramel shadow tart for dessert. Beel was drooling at just the thought of it. He was almost at the ordering station when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Beel growled and turned around, baring his teeth at whoever dared to disturb him.

Belphegor narrowed his eyebrows in concern. "Woah. Beel, relax. It's just me. We've got a student council meeting, and Lucifer has threatened to take away supper from whoever skips out." Beelzebub scoffed as the air around him darkened at the mention of someone taking food away from him. "I'd like to see him try." Belphie raised an eyebrow at his twin's uncharacteristically grumpy behaviour. "Are you alright, Beel?" As though to answer his question, Beel's stomach let out another loud roar, causing several students to flinch and Beel to scowl in frustration. "I'm hungry." Belphie's frown deepened. Beel was always hungry, but he didn't usually let it get to him like this. The younger twin rifled through his own bag before pulling out an obviously full paper bag. "You can have my lunch if you want. I ate a little bit of it during class and swiped a bagel from Mammon during the first period, so I'm not all that-" Before he could finish Beel ripped the bag out of Belphie's hands and devoured it, bag and all. Belphie blinked at his now empty hand and chuckled as Beel chewed. "Man, you must be starving huh?"

Beelzebub merely grunted and continued to chew before swallowing down the small meal. He glanced back at the lineup in the cafeteria and put a hand on his stomach as he thought about the lunch he should be enjoying. Belphie nudged him. "Come on, big guy. We got to get to that meeting. The sooner we get it over with, the more likely it is that we'll end early and you might be able to grab something before class starts again." Only the meeting was not short and quick like Belphie had said it might be. Diavolo wanted everyone to come up with an idea for a school fundraiser, and Lucifer was arguing with Asmodeus on what was and was not appropriate. To make matters worse, you were unable to attend as, according to Mammon, your charms professor had asked you to stay behind afterwards to discuss your progress in the class. The bickering on top of the lack of food in his stomach was giving Beel a migraine and the longer he sat there, the more irritable he had become. Eventually, it became too much and he snapped. "ENOUGH!" he bellowed, flipping the table as he stood. "No one cares about the stupid fundraiser anyway and you're just wasting all of our time arguing over something that will inevitably fall apart and cause an even bigger mess, just like it always does!" "Beelzebub! Watch your tone in front of-" "Shut it, Lucifer!" his brother's gaped at him in shock as he snarled at their elder. "I am sick and tired of you pushing us all around and punishing us when the slightest thing goes wrong just because you-" Beel poked Lucifer's chest hard enough to make him take a step back, "won't take responsibility for your own mistakes!" "Oh shit," Mammon whispered under his breath, as Lucifer's eyes narrowed and his body tensed in defence. The second-born quickly squeezed his way between the two of them and spread his arms to try and create some distance. "Okay! Tensions are high. People are upset. But this is not the place to brawl it out." he glanced over at Lucifer who looked like he was a second away from stringing him up to the ceiling. "Might I remind ya Lord Diavolo is still in the room?" Lucifer looked over at Diavolo, who appeared to be both hurt and concerned by Beelzebub's words, before sighing and fixing his composure. He gave Beel a hard look. "Obviously something is upsetting you, but we can discuss this at home. For the time being, I recommend you work on calming yourself and clearing your head." Beel just growled at him before stomping out of the student council room. He had been about to re-enter the cafeteria again when the bell rang signalling the end of lunch hour. Beelzebub felt his eye twitch before his demon form burst into existence. He let out a deafening scream as he grabbed a table and threw it across the room (students still seated on it, included). Students were yelling and scrambling like mice as the large demon rampaged through the halls. He tore the locked grate off of the serving station and grabbed the nearest server by the scruff of the collar, causing them to squeak in fear. "I'm hungry," Beel rumbled lowly as the demon trembled in his hands. "Get me something to eat now or I will not hesitate to eat you." "R-R-Right away, Beelzeb-b-bub." Beel carelessly dropped the demon, who scattered off to gather as much food as they could. He began pacing like a caged animal. Having been alerted by all the noise, his brothers and Diavolo rushed into the nearly destroyed cafeteria. Diavolo's jaw dropped. "Beelzebub, what's the meaning of all this?" Beel's famished brain didn't acknowledge Diavolo as an authority at the moment. Instead, he was yet another person trying to keep him from eating. "I need food. NOW!" Lucifer's eyes widened in realization as he whispered something to Diavolo. The prince nodded and took a step back. "I'm sure the cooks are doing all they can to get you food right away. But I need you to control yourself before I am forced to take action." Satan had his phone out and was urgently texting someone, as Belphie moved forward.

"You'll get your food shortly Beel. You just need to wai-" "I don't want to wait!!" There was a part of Beelzebub's brain that was aware he was acting like a child. But his stomach physically hurt from how empty it was. He was tired. He was starving. He didn't have the patience for pleasantries. "I've barely eaten anything all day, and people keep staring and talking about me because my stomach just will not stop growling and I'm so hungry that I can barely think straight! I hate it! But I know it won't go away unless I eat, so I NEED TO EAT!" The brothers looked at Beel in shock. They knew that he ate a lot, but they always passed it off as just another quirk that made him Beel. They didn't know it bothered him like this. They thought back on all the instances where Beel had stated that he was hungry out of nowhere, always with a distressed look on his face. Every single time they had brushed him off. Before any of them could respond, you casually walked into the war zone that was the cafeteria. "Alright Satan, what's so urgent that you needed me so badly?" The room fell quiet as everyone's attention snapped over to you and you took in the situation. It didn't take long for you to connect the dots.

You immediately began to rush over to Beelzebub; Mammon stepped forward to stop you. "Woah, MC! I don't think that's a good idea right now!"

You ignored him and continued to make your way to Beel. Seeing you, the small human that you were, made Beel realize just how reckless he had been acting. He held out his hands to stop you and took a step away. "You should listen to Mammon, MC. I-I haven't eaten all day and I-" "You haven't eaten all day?! Oh god, this is worst than I thought." Beel watched as you slid the oversized backpack that he had seen you carry around RAD with you every day off your back and begin to dump out the contents. In a second, dozens of bags of chips, candy, fruits, and other snacks spilled across the floor in front of the two of you. Beel didn't waste a single moment. He instantly began consuming the snacks, causing you to smile happily. "Wha-What?! MC?! Why the hell do you have that much food on ya?!" Mammon sputtered as he cautiously began to approach you. You shrugged. "Beel gets upset when he's hungry, and I don't like it when he's upset. So I stocked up on some of his favourite snacks a while back and always keep them on me just in case," Beel paused his eating to look up at you in awe, "He can't help that he's always hungry. It's not like he asked to be the Avatar of Gluttony." Suddenly there were a pair of arms wrapped around your waist. Lucifer, Levi, and Mammon called out your name as Beel pulled you tightly against his chest. You just grinned and hugged the friendly giant back. "Thank you," he whispered softly into your hair, his arms tightening around you just a little more. "There's nothing to thank me for." As Beel finally began to calm down, the cooks came out with platters of food and shakily laid them out around you and Beel before taking cover back into the kitchen. Seeing that the threat had passed, the other brothers began to approach as well. "You know Beel, I didn't know you had that much pent-up anger inside of you. It was terrifying!" Asmodeus chirped as he plopped down beside the two of you.

"Yeah! You were just like the antagonist in My Boyfriend Turned Into a Cannabilistic Rage Monster, And Now I Have to Stop Him From Devouring The Whole City!!!" Levi began to ramble about specific scenes from the show that matched perfectly with Beel's rampage, causing Beel to blush as he munched on a burger. Belphie sighed and elbowed Beel as he took his seat at his side. "We'll have to make sure that MC's always around you. Just in case you know?" he smiled softly, before looking at his twin with a more serious expression. "You should've told me about all that stuff you said earlier. I had no idea you felt that away about your appetite." Beel looked away uncomfortably as he took another bite of his food and avoided the question. You snuggled closer to him, to provide him with some comfort. Satan tapped his chin as he watched the group. "I'm sure we could talk with Barbatos and come up with some sort of high-protein shake or bar that would better satisfy you. That way you wouldn't have to eat as much." Lucifer glanced over at Diavolo, silently asking if it was a possibility. The prince smiled warmly. "I'll have Barabatos begin working on something right away." Forgetting all about class and the anger that had previously consumed him, Beel looked around at his family. A warm feeling blossomed in his stomach as he felt content with the rare care and affection that they were openly showing. Maybe it had something to do with the thirty burgers he had already ate, but for just a second, Beel didn't feel so hungry anymore. ***Boy that got a little angsty there for a second, but I hope this was to your liking @sinnoman! I definitely enjoyed writing this one, and I think it made me fall in love with my boy Beel even more 🥰*** TAGLIST: @vampwiire @bunna-does-stuff

[chubbology]

Overindulged

prompt: feeder boyfriend quits his job and balloons as fat as his feedee/feeder girlfriend

He drove his sleek BMW up his driveway and into the middle garage just as dusk settled into night. He’d stayed overtime at work again, and to make it up to his girlfriend, three dozen fresh assorted donuts sat in the passenger seat.

Sure enough, immediately upon opening the back door with his stack of boxes, he heard her voice: “Late.”

“It’s the end of the month,” he said. “What do you expect? Brought you something though, so don’t be mad. Come in here.”

He set the boxes down on the granite island, then waited, sucking in a breath. His pupils dilated as his favorite person in the world waddled through the wide archway leading into the kitchen. After giving him a pout, she pulled the boxes toward her with arms that hung, at their heaviest, over half a foot with fat.

She was a beautiful, enormous woman. He had met her on a plane three years ago on a business trip to Paris. She’d pulled him into conversation like a warm whirlpool, and he’d listened in awe to her life story: miserable wife of a banker to a happily divorced entrepreneur, flying first class on her own dime.

With a smug, knowing smile, she talked about how she used to be skinny for her ex’s sake and now was free. He couldn’t help but let his gaze roam over her blatantly overweight body. Thighs pressing firm on either armrest of the wide seat, bust prominent and heavy, belly button deep and visible through her dress.

Bad news is, she’d concluded, I just settled a messy lawsuit that lost me my career and nearly bankrupted me. But she shrugged, as if such was life. I’m taking my last-hurrah vacation until I have no choice but to eat tiny, unsatisfying meals again.

He decided that couldn’t come to pass, so he spent as much time with her outside his business obligations as he could, taking her to meal after meal, falling in love as she ate to her heart’s content and shamelessly talked about how she’d rather fallen in love with gaining weight. It titillated and empowered her. By the end of their two week stay in Paris, she was twelve pounds bigger and he had invited her to live with him for a while as she looked for a new career path. She accepted.

Three years later, she’d found her calling without having to leave his luxurious, spacious home. Doing what she loved.

She was almost four hundred and fifty pounds now, last he was updated. She always wore leggings that clung to every lump and bulge of cellulite, and she liked to tease him by wearing crop tops, letting her massive belly and side rolls hang out and wobble as they pleased.

He watched with soft eyes as she stuffed herself with four jelly-filled doughnuts. Between bites she said, “These long hours at your soulless job are no good. My fans want to see more of you.” More eating. “The last time you fed me on camera was weeks ago!”

She gave him an imploring look as she ate a fifth doughnut. Boston creme. Her face, once conventionally pretty, now had a sexy overindulged look. She’d lost her jawline to additional chins and neck fat, and her round, fatty cheeks quivered as she chewed. Even before she finished the fifth doughnut, she picked up a sixth. “And don’t think they haven’t noticed that little tummy you have now.”

“What?” He looked down at himself, blushing at how his tie sat out a bit on slightly stretched white buttons.

Before he could say anything, she pushed a chocolate doughnut in his hand. “I know people willing to pay a pretty petty to see you chunk out.” She smirked. “Pop a couple of those buttons.”

He laughed dismissively, but as he ate the doughnut, he contemplated the press of his new chub against his shirt. His pants felt a little tight in the ass, too, now that he thought about it. What if? he thought.

Suddenly, he found himself admitting: “I’ve been thinking of quitting.”

Her eyebrows rose.

“I want to spend more time with you,” he explained. He hadn’t meant to talk about it now, but here he was. Out of nervousness, he pulled one of the boxes toward himself and picked another doughnut, this one caving in under its sprinkles. He took a heavenly bite. “I have plenty of money saved and invested to take care of both of us for a long time. I just don’t see why I…”

She waddled over to his side of the island and took his free hand. “You know I’d support you.” Then she pulled him closer, into a smiling kiss. “I’ll support you real good.”

*

Before his two week notice even ended, he was eight pounds heavier, and he relished how his coworkers’ eyes lingered on his burgeoning waistline. Soon, his tummy was pushing over his pants. His chest felt thicker. He felt his ass spread wider when he sat down. He ate desserts all the time, and his girlfriend lavished him with attention (food) at every opportunity when he was home, encouraging him to eat in amounts he’d never let himself eat before. She started filming - with his consent, as always - the development of his chubbing up. Her fans loved him even more than they already did, compliments coming in faster than he could read them.

One month into being an unemployed man, she stuffed him on camera until one of his shirt buttons popped off. The experience was more of a revelation for him than even becoming officially overweight; that night, after she went to sleep, he got out of bed, squeezed into an old pair of slacks that barely fit him, then gorged himself in the kitchen until he gasped at the relief of his ass seam tearing open, unable to accommodate his butt, which everyone online said was growing gorgeously fat. His heart fluttered just thinking about it, and he hoped his ass kept growing.

It did.

“I admit, I never thought you’d be this much of a pear,” his girlfriend told him, six months into his steady ballooning. They were admiring his progress in the large bathroom mirror. He may have looked small relative to his partner’s morbid obesity, but somehow, they were both more fascinated with his growth at the moment. She outlined his bottom heavy figure with her hands. Fat had indeed stored most eagerly in his ass, thighs, and hips. His belly drooped soft and wide.

“I love it,” she said. “Love everything about you.” But then something else came into her expression. “Except how you’ve stopped picking up after yourself.”

He swallowed, and said honestly, “Sorry. I know I’m getting lazier.”

“We’ll have to hire a maid.” She grinned wickedly. “Or do two pigs deserve to roll in their sty?”

*

A year into living on his passive income and her subscribers, the couple had not yet hired any cleaning services, and his country club house was...well. Not trashed, but messy and disorganized. She blamed the five pounds she’d lost over the past month on having to constantly throw his trash away. She punished him by making him stand while drinking a whole liter of full-sugar soda. Since he’d developed a strong distaste for any physical effort as he sunk deeper into obesity, he grumbled the whole time. When he finally fell back on the couch, she sat too. Together, they took up most of it. But while she looked perfectly composed, he was panting raggedly, slightly sweaty, a food stain on his pants.

“Look.” She reached out and held his chubby wrist. “I can tell that the fatter you get, the more your natural inclination is to be a pig.” She spoke with total matter-of-factness. As if the emergence of his inner pig was unsurprising and inevitable. “It’s not uncommon in men - that urge to oink and eat as a way of life. But we share this space. I help pay off this house. Please throw away your take out containers.”

Then she added, at his long-suffering sigh, “I’ll reward you.”

He met her gaze. “Tonight?”

“Tonight.”

*

This time, there were no cameras. There was just her, sitting on one side of their king bed and him on the other, breathing heavy, taking her reward one bite at a time.

Everywhere in their bed were containers and packages and napkins and soda bottles. He had eaten mexican and noodles and burgers and fries. He’d eaten candy bars and sundaes and milkshakes and chunky cookies. He was so full he could feel the skin of his belly stretching. He could practically feel the skin of his thighs stretching, as if they were filling up heavier with fat right then, as he was determinedly overfed. He swallowed another bite of greasy cheeseburger.

“Keep going. I can tell you're slowing down, but I’ll have none of that yet. I want to see progress from you.”

“I don’t know…”

“Do you want to feel the ecstasy of squeezing through a doorframe or are you going to plateau at being just fat?”

He let out a breathy moan as he ate another bite of the cheeseburger. His girlfriend knew him too well. She knew he liked the new challenges being big was causing him. She knew it turned him on that he sat so much fatter in his own car, belly pressing against everything, ass barely fitting at all. She knew his hands had begun cupping his hips as a half-unconscious habit, admiring his own width.

He liked how his thighs had to push past each other, jiggling every time. He even liked when he accidentally bumped into things, because it was a hot reminder that he wasn’t the same. He was like her now. He was fat. He was a pig. He wanted to eat and get so big he could barely even waddle. He wanted to squeeze through doorways. He wanted to get stuck.

“I want everything,” he said. And she smiled, temporarily pleased.

*

Thank you to the reader who commissioned this work!

I'd love to write more. Check me out <3 etsy.com/shop/Chubbology

[eeunoia]

ENHYPEN Mini Series

E N H Y P E N as Campus Heart-throbs

pairings: kim sunoo x reader

summary: what will happen when an extrovert campus social butterfly met an introvert?

word count: 6.2k

a/n: OKAY FORGIVE ME. I know it took so long for me to upload this but please try to understand me. School stressed me out and happen to ate all of my time. I’ll try to do better, enjoy! So, Sunoo’s stroy will be the most chill out of them all. Sunghoon’s story gave me a lot of stress while writing it while Sunoo’s didn’t. I enjoyed writing this one because I think they’re really cute. 🌸

tag list: @jakeysim @kpoppinandlockin @en-sun @f1iore @dilfhwa​ @rubyanne​ @enhappy​

Kim Sunoo

Class 2 - A - “The Social Butterfly”

Being a natural born introvert, it sure is difficult for you to deal with other people. It’s not that you hate them or anything, you just simply prefer being alone than to be surrounded by a bunch of people.

You hate being the center of attention so standing in front of the class right is really uncomfortable for you. With faces very unfamiliar for you, you fiddled your fingers unconsciously.

“introduce yourself, please.” the teacher sounds nice despite the awkward situation. You gulped as you tried to roam your eyes around. The students in front of you have different expressions in their faces. Some looks interested, some looked like they don’t really care and some looked clueless.

“I’m y/n. Please, take care of me.” you even bowed after saying it.

Sunoo eyes settled at you. It’s not always that he’d been interested to other people, specially to new comers. But something in you really captured his attention.

“So everyone, let’s welcome, y/n. She’s new in our town so make sure to make her comfortable, okay?” the homeroom teacher told the whole class and they answered, ‘yes’ in unison.

You were asked to take a seat at the vacant one at the middle. Sunoo smiled and removed his backpack at the vacant seat to welcome you. On the other hand, you haven’t noticed him yet. Your head was hanging low avoiding any eye contact from everybody.

As you sat down, Sunoo have a wide smile over his lips already excited to chat with you. “Y/n, right?” he didn’t actually need to double check your name. He knew your name very well since he listened well from a while ago.

Your eyes railed over to him, “yeah.” you answered shortly then quickly looked away. You’re not really used having eye contact with other people. It makes you feel uncomfortable for some reason. But even with a short glance, you noticed how beautiful his eyes were.

“I’m Sunoo! Kim Sunoo!” he sounded so cheerful. You gave him a small nod as you fished your notebook from your bag when the teacher said she’ll start the discussion.

Sunoo pouted at your cold response but pulled off a smile back, he thought it’s normal to react that way since he’s still a stranger to you. It’s just a little odd how you just shut him off that fast. He’s used to being liked by other people right away so the way you reacted was a really different.

“Please open your text book in page 156.” your hand stopped fiddling with your pen when you realize you didn’t picked up your text books yet. Sunoo noticed your expression right away and slid his text book between the two of you.

Your eyes trailed over his textbook then to him. You blush a little seeing his smiling face beside you. You were wondering what he is smiling so brightly about? “We can share, y/n!” you blushed more when you saw how cute he looked. You cleared your throat and looked away from him blinking your eyes.

“U-Uh thanks.” you were so shy but you have no choice but to share with him. You still didn’t have your text book so you’re somehow thankful he’s nice enough to offer sharing his.

The discussion went pretty well. He didn’t really bother you all throughout the lesson, well he did tried opening up conversations from time to time but he still let you listen to the teacher. He is cute, you’re not gonna lie.

You were alone as you went towards the school cafeteria. It’s lunch break and you wanted to buy a meal because you’re already hungry. Some eyes followed you in curiosity, probably wondering who you are since you’re new. You didn’t bother looking at them because you’re used to being new to a school. This isn’t the first time you transferred to a new school.

As you silently wait for your turn to buy your food, you noticed that their cafeteria is pretty spacious. It’s perfect to handle a lot of students. Compared to your previous school, this one is much more of a good school.

“Hi, Sunoo!” you heard somebody from behind you said. You didn’t look back or anything. You’re pretty sure he isn’t the only Sunoo in the school right? This is a big school so there’s a possibility that he’s not the Sunoo who sit beside you is big, right?

You saw how some students in front of you turned their heads by hearing the name. It’s like they’re curious or something. Once they saw who it was, their eyes sparkles. Specially the girls.

“Y/n!” your head turned over to the side when you heard someone called my name.

It was your seat-mate, Kim Sunoo. He was smiling brightly at you and with an awkward smile, you greeted him. You’re not really sure what’s going on but the students around you were obviously watching. Feeling conscious, you roamed your eyes around. They were looking at the two of you with wonder in their eyes.

“Do you want to join us in our table? I’ll go save you a seat.” he sounded so excited as he said those words to you.

Some of the students near you heard his invitation and their mouth fell a bit open. Sunoo’s known for being a social butterfly, yeah. He’s nice to everybody and very approachable. But he never invites people to eat lunch with him, specially he never offer to save seat to someone! It’s beyond what he usually do.

He doesn’t know what got into him as well. All he know is that he wants to know you more. He can’t just stop being curious of you. Is it because you’re such a mysterious person or maybe because he have nothing else to do? Nah. Whatever it is, he wants to get closer to you.

“U-Uh, that’s okay. I’m just here to buy a drink because I already ate lunch.” you reasoned out. You kind of felt bad for lying to him but you don’t really have a choice. You feel like you’re in a bad situation if you agree to eat with him.

His brows furrowed in confusion, “Huh? I didn’t saw you eat here?” his lips were pursed as he waits for your answer.

“I have packed lunch.” you told him just so he can leave you alone.

You saw how his shoulder fell but he pulled off another bright smile, “You can get a drink in the vending machine so you don’t have to wait for so long.”

Your eyes trailed over to the vending machine that he’s pointing. You almost let out a curse when he said that. With a nod, you moved away from the line and went to the vending machine to buy a drink.

After buying one, Sunoo offered if he can join you but one student halt him to talk. You felt relieved because finally, you can go. Without even saying goodbye, you left the scene.

You head your way over to the garden, you’re still not very familiar with the whole campus but you saw the garden on your way to the cafeteria. As expected, there’s only a few students here. It’s lunch time so everyone’s probably having their meals.

You let out a sigh as you heard your stomach grumble in hunger. You can’t believe you will skip lunch just because you don’t want to be in that kind of situation.

Sunoo’s smiling face appeared inside your head. A small guilt flickered over you. You know he’s just being friendly and maybe really just trying to make your feel comfortable since you’re new and trying to adjust. But it's not really your personality to became so friendly to strangers easily. You don’t feel comfortable about it.

You opened the random drink that you got from the vending machine and drink it. You have no other choice. You’re really starving but can’t go back to the cafeteria to buy food. Sunoo’s probably there and what will he feel if he knew that the real reason why you lied to him is because you don't want to eat with him?

You laid your head over to the table as you tried to just sleep to forget about your hunger. Minutes passed and your stomach still ache because hunger when suddenly, somebody put something at the table.

Your head raised right away feeling surprised. You're pretty sure you’re far from other students here in the garden so you’re wondering who it was.

Your brows furrowed when you saw Sunoo in front of you. He’s holding this paper bag and he’s now taking out some food. When you two met eyes you saw how his eyes smiled together with his lips.

“It’s not good to skip lunch, specially if you have class later.” he said and gave you some chopsticks to help you eat.

“I-I...” you don’t know what to say.

To see him in front of you smiling made you blush. Is he really this nice? Can somebody be really this nice to a stranger? Well you two aren’t really a complete stranger since you basically know each other's name. But still, you both don’t know much about each other.

"You should eat.” he said chuckling and even handed you a water.

You gulped and blushed really hard. He probably think you’re so stupid for lying or probably think you’re so rude for lying just to avoid eating with him.

“Hey, y/n. Are you okay? Is it the food? You don’t like it?” now, he sounded so worried.

You quickly snapped your head up to meet his eyes. “N-No! I liked it. It’s just I feel bad for lying t-to you.” you bit your lips because you felt embarrassed because of what you did and because of stuttering.

His pout slowly turned into a smile, "Nah, it's okay! I understand. I’m sorry for putting you into that awkward situation.” he started eating his food. Yeah he brought his food here too so you two can eat together. You don’t know but that somehow made something warm spread to your system.

You gave him a small nod, don’t really know what to tell him. You thought to yourself that he’s just so nice and guilt once again took over you. 

“I figured out you still don’t feel comfortable with the people around you since you’re new. I heard you’re new to the town too.” he started the conversation. You started to aid your hunger by the food Sunoo brought for you. He smiled a little feeling relieved that you’re now eating.

“Yeah, we moved in yesterday.” as much as you’re not a fan of conversating with other people, there’s something with Sunoo just makes you comfortable. It feels like it’s safe to talk to him about anything. 

He nodded his head looking at you with amusement. You wanted to chuckle because there’s nothing to be amused about, really. And besides, he looked cute with his cheeks stuffed with food.

“I noticed you’re not really that talkative. Is it because you’re still shy or are you an introvert?” Sunoo then asked still continuing with his food. You looked at him for a while as you eat your food.

“You don’t have to answer if you feel uncomfortable, y/n.” he shrugged his shoulders off assuring you that it’s completely fine. You let out a sigh before drinking from the water bottle that he handed you over a while ago.

“I’m an introvert and I prefer to be by myself most of the times.” you answered.

Sunoo looked thrilled when he heard you answer. Obviously. the two of you were the complete opposite. When Sunoo loves the attention, you’re not really fond of it. 

“Why? Doesn’t it make you feel lonely?” he asked you curious. The side of your lips lifted up as you heard him ask that. That’s what people usually thought when someone preferred to be alone.

“Not because you prefer to be by yourself meaning you’re lonely.” His mouth fell open for a bit when he heard that. It sound deep and you looked serious as you said those words.

“Well, you’re right.” he even shrugged his shoulders again then continued eating.

“Do you find it hard to adjust right now since you have to move and now you have a new school?” he asked you. Now that he knew you’re an introvert, he’s actually a bit worried because he knew it will be too hard for you to adjust.

“Not really. This isn’t the first time we moved from one place to another.” you said pretty much easier than you expected you could tell it to anybody. You’re actually a bit surprised how you’re talking to Sunoo like it’s just naturally part of your everyday routine.

Sunoo looked surprised when he heard that. “You moved often? Why?” he asked you sounding so curious. To know that you’re not really new in all of this kind of makes him amused.

“My Dad’s work involve him being physically there so we moved together with him.” you tried to explain the situation in the simplest way you can. He nodded his head, looks like he understands it right away.

With a furrowed brows he once again looked at you, “You can just stay in one place tho? It’s less hassle and can help you save money too. Moving is really expensive.” he said.

You lowered your head. He have a point. It is true that moving is stressful and is very expensive. He’s right about that and the stress from adjusting to another place just adds more to the things you have to worry about.

“I can’t find a place I can feel at home anyway. When we moved to a new place, it remains like that to me. It remains new and I can’t find any reason to stay.” you don’t mean anything about you say. you just randomly voiced out what’s inside your head.

Sunoo somehow felt sad about what he just heard. He don’t know but he sort of saw the loneliness in your eyes. He knows you made it clear that you’re not lonely or anything... but something’s just telling him that you are.

He sighed heavily, making you look at him. “Do you want me to tour you around the campus later after class?” he sounded excited.

You blushed once again seeing him smiling brightly at you. Feeling a bit shy and a burden to Sunoo, you were about to say no to him when the bell suddenly rang. Thankfully, you did finish your food and thanks to Sunoo you won’t attend your classes with an empty stomach,

You stood up now fixing your things so you can leave and go home. The classes are now finished and you’re happy you survived your first day in your new school. You thought it would be stressful but it wasn’t that bad.

“You ready, y/n?” your head snapped towards Sunoo when he approached beside you. He finished fixing his things up pretty quickly. And with a clueless expression you starred at him wondering what he’s talking about.

He playfully rolled his eyes and followed it with a chuckle. He can’t believe you forgot about the tour. Some students from your class watched the two of you interact to each other. They never saw Sunoo act so excitedly before. Yeah he’s always energetic but something in him feels different when he’s around you.

“huh?” you asked still clueless.

“I told you I’ll tour you around the campus after class.” he stated that made you remember what he said before the bell rang.

“oh...” your mind trailed over to the thought of how you can say no to him in the nicest way. Sunoo’s been nothing but nice to you so you don’t want to make him feel upset. Besides, he’s the first friend you’ve made here.

“I s-still have things to do at home so I have to be home early.” you tried making up so he can let you go. You’ve been a bother to him ever since lunch. He even bought you food that you tried to pay but he refused hardly. He told you that it’s his way of welcoming you.

He showed you a poker face, “No you don’t! Stop lying. It’s obvious that you can’t lie.” your mouth fell how he easily figured you out.

“I j-just don’t want to bother you.” finally, you admitted him.

He starred at you for a while before he sighed heavily and smiled at you. He extended his hand and messed your hair a bit.

“Nah, it’s fun spending time with you. I want to know you more so come on!” he didn’t let you say anything more but instead he started pulling your arm. You didn’t have any other choice but to go with Sunoo. Besides, it seems like it’s really gonna be fun.

He was smiling brightly as he tour you around the campus. You were right, it was a beautiful school. Before you even realize it, you were laughing comfortably with Sunoo. It’s almost like you two known each other for a long time.

“Don’t your parents ask you if you’re okay with moving or not?” he asked as he handed you the bubble tea that he just ordered for you. Inside a near cafe, you two decided to stop by and maybe take a rest before going home. Touring around tired both of you.

“They ask me of course. My parents were both nice and they don’t want me to have a hard time.” he was carefully watching you while you’re talking. Having him starring at you is surely making you conscious. So you can’t help but to blush from time to time and look away from him.

“And you always tell them that you’re okay with it?” he asked and reached out his hand over you. You stared down seeing that he’s holding a tissue for you to use. Feeling a bit overwhelmed by his small gestures, a smile unconsciously spreads through your face.

You’re actually surprised by how you’re acting right now as well. To think that you just spent almost 3 hours with a person you just met this morning is a news! You even laughed and talked comfortably with him. What kind of witch-craft is this?

“Yeah, I told you I don’t really find any reason to stay at a place.” that’s one thing that people find strange to you. You’re an introvert and don’t get along with people easily but you’re also okay with changes. You think you adapt pretty much quicker than expected.

“I hope you find a reason to stay here in our town.” he said ending it with his bright smile. You were a bit dumbfounded by what he said and you just felt your heart skipped a bit.

Your week in your new school goes on pretty fine. Eventually, you made some friends and Sunoo remained lurking around you. He often spends time with you and sometimes, people find it odd. They think you two just became too close to each other in a fast pace.

It was just days ago that you heard that Sunoo was really popular in your school. No wonder eyes follows the two of you around. Well, that didn’t even shock you so much since you’ve clearly see how attractive and adorable he is. He’s very nice and really get along with people very well.

“y/n! Do you have an answer in our assignment in physics?” he did this cute voice as he went to his seat which is beside you. He was just outside doing club activities and now he came back.

You smirked and pulled out your notebook to hand it to him. His eyes sparkled at the sight of it and surprisingly hugged you out of excitement. Despite of being nice to everybody, Sunoo rarely makes skin-ship so what he did kind of surprised not just you, but also those students that saw what he just did.

He sat down beside you like nothing just happened and started copying your answers. With a blushing face, you heaved out a sigh and started to divert your attention away from the hug. Yeah, you two were getting close but that was the first time that he hugged you.

“You okay?” he innocently asked when he noticed that your face was tinted red. He furrowed his brows getting a bit worried for you.

“Y-yeah, it’s just hot here.” you tried reasoning out and even used your hand to fan yourself. The crease in his forehead got more deeper as he grabbed his water bottle and handed it to you.

Your eyes dropped over his cute blue water jug, “Here, drink water.” he said and your hand unconsciously get it from him. He smiled and even helped you open the cap but he started copying once again.

You gulped feeling your heart beat faster. What is he doing to you? You were completely confused to what’s happening to you. Honestly you have an answer inside your head but you’re trying to shrug it off. You’re not yet ready to admit that to yourself yet.

“Do you think it will be okay, tho?” he asked you as he placed two drinks at your table. It’s lunch time and you planned to just buy yourself a drink once you place your tray at your table but here he is, he bought two drinks already.

You pouted, blushing once again. Sunoo just takes very good care of you. He really do it to the point that your heart really warms up for him. Sunoo sometimes find it odd too because ever since he met you and became close to you, he started acting like this. Like as if he wanted to be by your side all the time. He started buying things for two people, like for example, right now, he unconsciously bought you a drink as well.

“How much?” you asked him ready to pull some bill from your wallet but he showed you his poker face before opening the drink for you then handed it to you.

“Never mind it and start eating instead.” he said seriously and you just shrugged your shoulders and followed what he said.

You two gradually get back to your normal conversations. Students greets Sunoo from time to time whenever those who knows him  (which is a lot) pass by your table. You were slowly getting used to it. Even with those glaring eyes from the girls who have feelings for him were not new to you anymore.

“Where’s Sunoo, y/n? The teachers were looking for him because this is his second day absent.” your head snapped over to one of your classmates one afternoon when she suddenly approached your table and asked that.

Your brows furrowed and shrugged your shoulders. “I don’t know. Why are you asking me?” you were confused why they started looking for Sunoo at you.

She smiled apologetically at you, “Oh.. I’m sorry. I just thought you know since you two were basically very close.” she then exits herself and started walking away.

You sighed heavily and your eyes darted over the vacant chair beside you. You’re actually very worried for Sunoo. Of course, you already sent him a text but he didn’t replied to you. While biting your lower lip, you made up your mind. You’ll go check on him after class just to see if he’s doing fine.

Feeling a bit hesitant you stood right in front of their house. He still didn’t replied or anything to you so that made you worried even more. After letting out a heavy sigh, you stretched out your hand and clicked the doorbell.

It rang and you patiently wait outside while your heart beat faster out of nervous. You were a bit startled when the gate to their house opened and a Sunoo wrapped inside a thick blanket greets you.

Suddenly your nervous was instantly replaced by worry as you saw him as this state. You advanced and quickly put the back of your hand over at his forehead.

“y/n?” he was surprised that you’re at his house.

“You have fever! Are you okay?” that was a dumb question because obviously he isn’t.

With cheeks tinted red, he held your hand and take it off from his forehead. “What are you doing here?” he asked you with furrowed brows.

You pouted kind of not used that he’s not smiling at you. n “I was worried because you’re absent and you’re not replying to my messages as well.” you told him.

His mouth fell open for a while, his hand still holding unto the hand you laid over his forehead.

“I don’t want you catching my cold.” he said trying to distance himself from you.

You smiled and Sunoo eyes settled over at your smiling face. This isn’t the first time he saw you smiling but this actually the first time he actually appreciated how beautiful you look while smiling.

“It’s okay! I don’t get sick easily.” you said trying hard to convince him.

He starred at you for a while and eventually gave in and let you go inside. He lets you go first as he closed the gate behind you. Your mouth fell open as you admire their house when you entered but your brows furrowed.

“Are you alone?” you asked wondering why the house sounded so empty.

Sunoo let himself dropped over the couch, n “My parents left for a business trip.” he said. You nodded your head and went close to him.

Sunoo gulped and sat properly as you walk closer. You leaned down and once again make your hand rest at his forehead. He’s hot. (I mean, have you seen him with a plain white polo----) 

“Did you check your temperature already?” you asked him.

His eyes pierced right at yours and even when you’re feeling weak because of it, you tried not to look away from him. “Yeah, I have a fever.”

You nodded your head at him and even fixed the blanket so it will perfectly cover him. Your gentle touch makes Sunoo blush once again. Thankfully he have a fever so you’ll think his cheeks were red because he’s not feeling well.

“Have you eaten yet?”

“I can’t cook.” of course. You sighed and tied up your hair to keep them away from your face.

“You’ll c-cook for me?” he followed behind you as you made your way over at their kitchen.

“yeah.” and you gave him a smile before checking their fridge to make him some soup.

Sunoo sat down over at one of the stool and your brows furrowed while watching him do it. “What are you doing? Go lay down!” you said walking towards him to make him go down the stool.

“I want to accompany you.” he said refusing.

“You should rest.” you told him but he pouted at you.

“I am resting.” he said while starring right at your eyes. You gulped and both of you blushed when you realized you’ve been starring for a while.

You smiled a little starring at Sunoo’s sleeping state. He looked adorable while having his lips opened a little while asleep. His temperature went down already and he seems okay. You looked over at the blanket that was at the sofa. While looking after him, you fell asleep and he covered you with a blanket.

Now, you woke up and saw him asleep. Sunoo looked handsome always. Sometimes, you even think it’s so unfair how he can look this good even while sleeping? 

You’re glad that he’s okay now. He really made you worried because he’s not responding to you. Feeling somewhat happy because finally, you had helped him for something. He’s always been the one who takes care of you but today, the role was switched and you’re glad you had returned the favor.

Just by thinking about it, Sunoo’s been really caring for you. Doing small things that you really appreciate. He just make sure you know he’s there no matter what and you want to make him feel the same. You want to be there for him too.

Your smile suddenly faltered and faded when you realized that you have feelings for him. Mixed emotions took over your whole system. You don’t know what exactly to do right now. You’re happy and excited for this new emotion you’re experiencing but you’re also afraid as to how he will react when he knew about this.

You know he’s nice and he’s probably used to people liking him but you’re afraid it’ll make your friendship awkward. You’re afraid that he’ll start treating you differently and find it awkward hanging out with you. You don’t know if you can take that.

As you enter the campus, some eyes were already plastered over at you. Even if you’re wondering why, you decided to just shrug it off and decided to just walk silently towards your classroom. As you get closer to your room, eyes were still eyeing you. Feeling very conscious about it, you had no choice but to lower down your head.

You let out a loud sigh when finally, you made it inside. But that’s what you thought. Your classmates eyes were starring at you as well. Feeling flustered once again, you went straight over your chair.

“y/n!” your classmate who sits in front of you turned around to face you. Unlike the other students, her stares were a lot more gentle. You felt somehow relieved. Feeling so lost because of their unusual stares.

“What’s going on? Is it just me or everyone’s looking at me?” you asked her with worried eyes. She smiled, looking a bit excited.

“How can they not stare at you? Have you seen what Sunoo posted?” she asked you giggling. Your head tilted over to the side as your brows furrowed in confusion.

“What post?” 

“He posted a picture of you sleeping in his house! Why are you at his place yesterday?” she sounded excited while you’re dumbfounded. You can’t even make up what’s she’s saying because she was busy processing things inside her head.

Huh? Picture? Of me sleeping? What is it???? You quickly grabbed your phone to check what she’s talking about. You’re eyes grew big when you saw your account with an unusual number of notifications.

As you click one of it, it leads you towards a post with lots of comments and likes. It was Sunoo’s post and your classmate was right. It was a photo of you, sleeping. 

You blushed because of it but you tried really hard not to put so much meaning into it. Maybe he’s just really thankful for you. Yeah, y/n. Maybe that’s just it.

You tried hard to divert your attention away from the post. It was hard since your classmates were still eyeing you even when the class were already starting. They were stealing glances at you. It was frustrating and you don’t know if you should be thankful that Sunoo’s not here yet or what.

“Yah, y/n, right?” You were taken aback when some group of girls approached you while you’re at your usual spot here in the garden. It was your vacant and to avoid the glances of your classmates, you decided to leave the room for a while to go and have some fresh air. 

With furrowed brows you stood up, “Yeah.” you answered feeling a bit nervous.

With faces looking so stern and serious, you already have a guess why they’re here confronting. It’s probably because of Sunoo, right? Of course it’s gotta be because of him.

“What exactly do you have with Sunoo?” the girl in the middle advanced towards you. Feeling intimidated and scared, you stepped backwards but the other girls went behind you cornering you.

“N-Nothing, we’re friends.” you answered stuttering because of fear.

She looked pissed at what you answered, n “Liar! Friends? I always noticed the way you look at him! You like him! Why are you at his house yesterday? You got to be that desperate huh?” she once again advances towards you and even pushed you hardly.

You tried not to fell over the ground because that would be so pathetic. You gulped trying to swallow the lump building up inside your throat. You’re really scared right now and this is the first time this is ever happen in your life.

“I’m saying the truth. And I was at his house because--” you can’t even finish your sentence when a loud slap crashed over your cheeks.

You were dumbfounded and startled by the sudden attack from her. You never experienced things like this so you don’t exactly know what to feel right now. You can’t even move out of surprise! Your cheeks were hurting so bad and you bet it’s really red now.

“Sunoo and I were completely okay and you just entered in our life? How dare you! I can’t accept this!” she was going hysterical. You were confused why she’s even acting like this. You don’t even know her.

When she was about to slap you once again, you decided to close your eyes and just wait for it to land over your cheeks in the second time but it didn’t happen.

You opened your eyes a little trying to take a peak and you saw someone in front of you. As you roam your eyes around, you saw horror in the other girl’s eyes. 

“What do you think are you doing?” it was Sunoo! You were a little confused because he doesn’t sound like Sunoo. He sounded so cold and emotionless.

“S-Sunoo!” the girl looked surprised that he’s in front of you now, protecting you from the girl who slapped you.

“Who told you that you can hurt, y/n?” he asked sternly and shoved away her hand. It was a bit strong so she backed up away from you. Her eyes started to water.

“Sunoo I like you!”

“And I told you, I don’t.” he was quick enough to response to her. It sent chills all over your spine when you heard how cruel he just rejected her. Will that happen to you as well?

“B-But--”

“I don’t want anything like this to happen again, do you hear me? Nobody’s allowed to hurt y/n or else you’ll deal with me.” he said seriously as his hand slowly took reach of yours. He softly held it before he send glares over them then turned around to face you.

His eyes slowly turned soft as he eye your red cheeks and slightly tear stained eyes. He was so worried for you and kind of feel bad that this things were happening because of him.

“Let’s get that fixed, baby.” you can’t even react at what you heard because he already started pulling you towards the clinic and away from those people.

“Thank you.” he smiled a little to the nurse as she handed him ice. You two were left afterwards and you gulped nervously.

You both were silent as you walk there, you didn’t dare to ask what you just heard and he didn’t dare to open up the topic about it too. You thought to yourself that it would be okay to maybe just ignore it. Maybe he was just really worried that it slipped out of his mouth.

“Let me see?”  his hand feels so smooth while holding your face. His eyes were busy checking your red cheeks and his brows was hardly furrowed.

You chuckled a little and tried fixing his forehead. “Why you look so mad?” you asked like a joke to try and make him feel better.

“How can I not be mad? They hurt you.”

“She’s just misunderstanding our friendship.” you said chuckling. Sunoo pulled away as he stood straight. His eyes were now darted over you seriously.

He clenched his jaw then balled his fist. “Y/n.”

You suddenly felt chills ran down your spine as you heard him call your name. Having him call you by your name with serious face surely is different from when he calls you while smiling brightly. Suddenly, you’re nervous.

“H-huh?” you asked.

“Can I be the reason why you want to stay at this town?” he muttered and you saw how his cheeks got tinted red.

“What?” you thought you heard it wrong. Does he mean it like you think he mean it?

He sighed and starred right at your eyes, “Y/n, I have feelings for you.”

Feeling so overwhelmed and dumbfounded by what you just heard, your eyes started to watered as your heart aches. Is this really happening? You were just thinking of how you should tell him about your feelings.

“Are you serious?” 

“Do I look like I’m joking?” 

You stood up and threw yourself at him for a hug. He chuckled and felt his heart race as he burry his face over your neck inhaling your familiar scent.

“Now, you don’t have to leave anymore because I’ll be the reason for you to stay.” you pulled off the hug and leaned closer to Sunoo letting both of your noses to touch each other.

“I would love to stay.” you muttered before he leaned closer to kiss you passionately at your lips.

main master-list

campus heart-throb

[simeonisalesbian]

Safe Beelzebub x MC

Is writing self-indulgent fluff a coping mechanism? Well uh anyways here's Wonderwall... As always gender-neutral MC. Warnings for skipping meals and just generally self-deprecating thoughts. Enjoy all the same. Words: 802

Mc laid on their bed staring at the stack of work that was sitting on their desk across the room. There were at least two assignments that had to be done before class tomorrow, an essay due by the end of the week, a test that needed to be studied for, and to top it all off there was some random paperwork Lucifer passed down to them about their time in the exchange program. It all needed to be done and yet Mc laid there staring at it all uselessly.

Useless useless useless.

Mc pulled the blanket over their head as if that would help shut up their own brain. Everything felt like too much right now and the thought of moving made them want to throw up. And yet their brain was still working against them trying to bully them into doing the work on their desk.

There was a soft knock on the door. Or at least it sounded soft to them since it seemed to come from miles away.

“Mc? It’s dinner. You weren’t answering your phone.” It was Beel’s voice coming from the doorway.

Mc peeked their head out from the blankets to glance at the phone sitting on the desk, next to the work that had to get done. They felt their stomach churn at the thought. How can they eat when they haven't even touched their work. Had they really been laying there since they got home? The light from the hallway was starting to make their headache.

“I’ll eat later, ‘kay?” Their voice sounded tired and weak and not at all convincing. We’re they actually going to eat later? Probably not. But they had to say something to keep the demon from dragging them out of their room.

“Are you sure?” Beel sounded concerned and looked unconvinced. His worry just caused Mc to feel even more guilty. What sort of monster disappoints Beelzebub?

They decided to just pull the blankets back over their head giving the demon a soft ‘mhmm’ hoping that he’d leave.

When the door softly clicked shut they let out a choked sob. Why were they crying? They told him they were fine. They didn’t want to be comforted but at the same time, they did. They wanted to be dragged out of the room and be told to eat but the thought of that made them sick.

Their stomach let out a low growl. When was the last time they ate something? They slept through breakfast to cling on to a few minutes of sleep and they only had a small snack for lunch skipping an actual meal to study between classes. They should eat. They knew they should eat. Just like they should do their work. They can’t eat until they do their work. They don't deserve to eat until they do their work. Instead, they just sat there hugging a pillow to cry into for what somehow felt like both only seconds and several years.

Eventually, they felt two arms pull them into a hug. When did the door even open? They tried to focus on who could be holding them but their brain was fuzzy and they were still sobbing into the pillow they held in a death grip. They felt the person humming more than actually hearing them. They focused on the soft vibrations and tried to catch their breath before pulling the pillow away from their face.

They looked up to see Beel’s worried expression staring back at them. He must have come back to check on them after dinner.

“Are you okay?” They wanted to say yes. But staring into Beel’s eye’s they couldn’t find the heart to lie to him. So instead they shook their head before burying their head into the demon’s chest.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

When Mc opened their mouth to reply nothing came out. So instead they just shook their head again. They felt Beel move and instinctively wrapped their arms around him silently pleading for him to stay.

“Not going anywhere don’t worry.” He said as if he read their mind. He moved around a bit more before settling down again. He tapped Mc’s back prompting them to sit up again. “Here.” He held a plate of food in front of them.”I asked my brothers and none of them have seen you eat today. I was worried you were going to starve so I tried to save you some dinner. It’s probably cold now though. Sorry.”

The food was in fact cold. However, after crying for god knows how long they couldn’t find it in them to actually care. It felt nice to eat. It felt nice to be cared for. Beel’s arms were warped around them again like a nice safe cocoon. They were safe.

[mysadhappydays]

TW!: Fat phobia, Body Dismorphia

I have been told my body fits the beauty standard. I have a hard time seeing this and not over analyzing myself in the mirror. I don’t think I’ve ever had an eating disorder, but I definitely think I have come close.

When I was about 12 or 13 years old, my family and I were going on a trip to visit family in Korea. I remember telling my mom that I have to stop eating a week before my trip, so that when I see uncle he would either say nothing about my body or tell me that I lost weight. My uncle, was a physical trainer at the time and had a lot to say to my father (his older brother) about how I need to watch my weight because I couldn’t properly do a sit up 2 years prior. I was 10. I proceeded to arrive in Korea and my grandmother would keep pushing her delicious food on me and I would always take a couple bites out of respect (I don’t know what was more disrespectful eating a couple bites and leaving left over or not eating it at all.). Then one day the children were playing and I was with my aunt in the living room. We heard screaming from one of the kids. She and I both bolted up in urgency and ran towards the commotion. Except I don’t remember what happened after I got up. I passed out and ended up hitting my head on a ledge on the other side of the living room. I woke up to my aunt rushing towards me as I felt a large amount of pressure on the back of my head. Luckily no blood was drawn but I woke up laughing and had a big bump on my head for about two weeks.

And now, 8 years later, I am sitting on my boyfriend’s bed after eating a Panera meal. My first meal of the day (aside from butter on a toasted bagel I had this morning after my 8am class). A bowl serving of creamy tomato soup and two baguettes. I feel full, content, yet guilty. Content is not good to maintain skinny. If I’m not still a little hungry after eating, then I ate too much. I don’t eat three meals a day even though I should. But honestly I’m not hungry enough on a day to day basis to want to eat. My fear of fattening up contributes to this, probably. I don’t exercise either because life has always felt so bleak so the only way to maintain the slim figure is to stay hungry. Maybe I am just lazy. Going about it in a cop out manner. But, I am still unhappy with my body. The way that my body is lacking in muscle and mostly inhabited by lard.

8 years later, I don’t deny the cosmetic surgeries anymore, because now it could come into fruition and I could look the way I always wanted. And it’s almost as if, my mindset has gotten weaker and is crumbling under the weight of society’s standards. As my brain begins to shrink, my thoughts will be ever expanding. 8 years later, I wish I didn’t still feel this way about myself. I wish I felt comfortable in the body I have. These thoughts make me inherently fat phobic, and I feel terrible about it. I believe all bodies are beautiful, in all shapes and sizes and colors. Just not on me. But I could be. I am jealous of people who can maintain such beautiful minds and bodies. My life has been a constant battle between me, myself, and I.

It’s a never ending cycle and it all comes down to me,

I am ashamed of myself.