#and i just happened across a very viable opportunity

[sleeptaken]

also. think im gonna take a page out of iii's book & let myself get hit in the face with unfamiliar music live

[lancermylove]

Chapter 4 (N.SFW)

➣ Pairing: Demon brothers, Royals, Solomon with fem!Reader. ➣ Warning: N.SFW ➣ Word Count: 3,366 ➣ Chapters [SFW]: [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12] ➣ Chapters [N.SFW]: [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12]

➣ A/N: I was very tired - so tired that I almost accidentally deleted the entire draft - when I wrote this, so hopefully, it turned out well. 😅

———————————————

The faintest morning light filtered through the window blinds, but you lay awake in bed. Unable to fall asleep again, you got ready and quietly went downstairs, trying to keep the wooden floorboards creaking to a minimum, to find the living area empty. Someone had turned the fireplace off, but the early winter chill on the first level was rather refreshing. 'Hm? Is that...?' Through one of the windows, you noticed Satan pacing back and forth a short distance from the cabin.

The sky above the cabin was painted a brilliant orange as the sun slowly rose from behind the snowy mountains, casting long shadows as it ascended the sky. Satan's hair was illuminated by the sun's rays, giving it the appearance of a crown on his head. His skin was red, and his face was contorted with anger, as though he could not escape the freezing temperatures' bitter chill.

"Good morning, Satan. What's wrong?" You worriedly asked, but when he didn't reply, you continued. "You shouldn't stay out too long."

"Demons are far more powerful than frail humans," he rasped, his tone harsher than he meant, making you wince. It was unusual for him to behave that way with you, so something unexpected must have happened.

The fourth brother sighed after realizing he had taken his anger for his brother out on you. "My apologies, (y/n). After you and Beel left yesterday, Lucifer forced me to shift into his bedroom. It's bad enough that I have to live under the same roof as him, but now, I have to share a room."

"It's okay, Satan. Why did Lucifer force you to move?" You asked curiously but knew the first brother's actions always had a meaning behind them.

"Diavolo had no issues staying with Lucifer, but Barbatos said it would be better for him to stay with his royal highness," Satan fumed. "So, Lucifer asked me to vacate my room. I asked the others if they would switch with me, and Solomon only agreed. But, of course, Lucifer intervened."

The Avatar of Wrath faced you, folded his arms across his chest, and mimicked his older brother's voice. "I refuse to share a room with Solomon. His mere presence gives me a headache."

His impersonation made you chuckle, but there had to be a viable solution to his situation. "Do you want to take my room? I don't mind sharing a room with Lucifer."

"Absolutely not!" He exclaimed, eliciting a laugh from you. You expected that reaction from him but thought to ask anyway. Who were you kidding? You just wanted to see Satan's reaction to you rooming with the Avatar of Pride.

"Then, why don't you find a common ground with Lucifer? That way, you can enjoy spending time with him." You suggested in hopes that he would give in to your request. Once your words settled in his mind, Satan's face lit up. The dark aura of despair hovering around him gave way to one filled with excitement, and his arms tightly coiled around your frame.

"That's it! (Y/n), you are a genius."

"Thank you?" You mumbled, baffled by his sudden enthusiasm. "But what do you plan to do?"

"Since Lucifer can't get away from me, this is the perfect opportunity to prank him. Endlessly." He grinned and released you from his grip. Without waiting for your response, Satan powerwalked to the main door of the cabin, leaving you screaming in the background. "W-Wait! Satan, that's not what I meant."

You sighed heavily and slumped your shoulders, mumbling to yourself. "That was not what I meant, Satan. Sorry, Lucifer. I think I just made your problem worse. I will be in deep waters if Lucifer learns about this conversation."

"Good morning, (y/n). Would you kindly repeat what you said?" Barbatos whispered behind you. His sudden appearance startled you and left you wondering how he managed to stealthily approach you without emitting even a single crunch of the snow underfoot. The small curls on the corners of his lips seemed to indicate that he had knowledge of the occurrences before his appearance.

"Satan doesn't want to stay with Lucifer, and I tried to tell him to find common ground so he could enjoy his time with his older brother. But Satan interpreted that as 'prank Lucifer endlessly'," you exhaled loudly through your mouth. "If Lucifer finds out about this, I will be in trouble."

Unbeknownst to the two of you, Solomon stood near a window inside the cabin, sipping tea from a mug, and expressionlessly peered at you. Barbatos chuckled at your unfounded concern but remained silent. His dark emerald eyes analyzed every aspect of your demeanor, although his expression betrayed nothing of his thoughts or feelings. He seemed to be gauging your discomfort around him, which further heightened your unease.

"What reason could you possibly have for your discomfort?"

His direct inquiry caught you off guard, but you saw no point in concealing the truth from him as you knew he would see through your lies. You mumbled your response, your gaze fixed on your white boots layered with fresh snow, "Lucifer might have caught on. I am worried, Barbatos."

"Do not worry needlessly, (y/n)," he reassured. "Now, my dear, I implore you to return to the cabin. The weather is frigid, and I would rather you not fall ill."

"You can go ahead, and I will join you in a few minutes. I need some fresh air to clear my thoughts." You dully said.

"As you wish, but do not take longer than necessary. Then, I shall take my leave," Barbatos warmly smiled, and to your surprise, his smile reached his eyes. Was this the first time you saw his genuine smile? You couldn't remember but felt happy nevertheless.

After a while, you took his advice and headed back, only to see Mammon sneakily approaching the main door with an object hidden in his hand behind his back. Although you attempted to discern the words on the folded stack of black and blue packets, Mammon thwarted your efforts and slid them inside his jacket's pocket.

"Mammon, what are you doing?" You asked, suspecting he was up to no good. As you expected, he was startled by your presence but managed to give you a nervous smile. He was definitely up to no good, but you hoped his ill intention would not result in Lucifer severely punishing him.

"I ain't doin' anythin', and before ya ask, I'm sneakin' in 'cause I'm tryin' to avoid...Solomon," he laughed. "Are ya hungry? 'Cause I'm starvin'. Let's get breakfast!"

With those words, Mammon ran into the cabin, avoiding any other question you might have had for him. You shook your head, but before you could enter, Solomon blocked your path. "Are you alright, (y/n)? You seemed troubled."

It was evident that the sorcerer suspected you were hiding a secret and sought to hear it directly from you. Given the potential ramifications of divulging the truth, specifically with respect to Lucifer, you promptly shook your head. "It's nothing. I've to get ready to go shopping with Levi, so excuse me."

As his eyes followed you, Solomon smiled to himself. What were you hiding from him, and why were you nervous around Barbatos? But the most crucial question was: should he pry into the matter or leave it alone?

"Don't be nervous, Levi. There aren't many people around this time of the day," you chuckled and squeezed his hand slightly. Levi said nothing as he scanned the colorful store you had brought him to.

Every rack and shelf had an array of Christmas clothes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. The walls were adorned with tinsel, mistletoes, snowflake cutouts, and wreaths, creating a festive atmosphere that filled you with a sense of joy and excitement. However, the endless wave of bright colors made your eyes water. In the front right corner of the store stood a teenager with her caramel eyes glued on her phone, utterly oblivious to her surroundings. The loud music blasting from her earphones made it clear that she was lost in her own world. Not paying heed to her lack of awareness, you made your way to the center of the store.

"Hey, Levi, is this festive enough?" You asked while holding a hanger up to your shoulders. The sweater on the hanger had a multitude of colors and clashing patterns, with green reindeer and snowflakes scattered throughout.

"It looks like you purchased an entire Christmas store and glued it to the sweater. Then, found a unicorn and asked it to hurl sparkles on it. But that still wasn't enough for you, so you wrapped the sweater in green and red tinsel garland," Levi laughed.

"Descriptive," you giggled. "So, what do you think about buying ugly sweaters for everyone?"

"No way that Lucifer, Satan, Asmo, and Barbatos would wear them," Levi responded as he looked through the rack of sweaters closest to him until one caught his attention. The green sweater had an upside-down realistic pizza slice with green tinsel garland wrapped around it and a star on top. "Beel would like this and probably try to eat it."

"Oh, that's perfect of him! Then, why don't we change the theme from ugly sweaters to witty or relatable sweaters?" You smiled, proud of your quick thinking, to which he readily agreed.

The first red and green sweater you found was ideal for Asmo. The main body of the wear was a creative nod to the holiday season, playing with the idea of being on the nice or naughty list. The words "On the Nice List" were printed in large white letters, but 'Nice' was spelled in white sequins with a black background. But with one sweep of your hand, the sequins flipped to the word 'Naughty', reminding you of Asmo's playful nature.

When you showed Levi your choice, he could not stop fiddling with the sequins, fascinated by their ability to change with one touch. As he giddily flipped back and forth between nice and naughty, you found a mustard yellow sweater fitted for Belphagor. In the center was a sloth clad in a vibrant red sweater with a matching Santa hat as it dozed off on a snow-covered branch adorned with Christmas lights. The sloth's arms were intertwined in a position of contentment as the words Merry Slothmas hovered above and below in vermillion. The remainder of the empty place was adorned with deep blue Christmas trees and snowflakes and green ornaments with red swirls.

"(Y/n) look at this. Doesn't he remind you of Lucifer?" Levi laughed, holding a crimson sweater up for you. This dark red sweatshirt was accented with a black rectangular shape, which extended to the sleeves. Within the rectangular shape was a backdrop of vibrant Christmas string lights, adding a pop of color to the mostly dark outfit. In the center, the words "Is this jolly enough?" were written in the shape of a Christmas tree. With his grumpy expression, the Grinch stood beside it with a cup of coffee in his hand, wrapped in string lights, and a red Santa hat on his head.

"Lucifer as the Grinch," you whispered while imagining Lucifer as the grouch in your favorite part of the classic movie. Somehow, the Grinch's expression reminded you of the stern first brother, making you laugh. "It's perfect! I bet this is what he will look like on Christmas morning."

Your next targets were the prince and his butler. You selected a fiery crimson sweatshirt for Diavolo with white pine trees, snowflakes, and candy canes printed on it. In front of the festive designs was a vibrant green frustrated T-Rex with a Santa cap, gazing at gifts that lay beyond his stubby reach. His tiny arms tried to grasp the presents, while "T-Rex Hates Christmas" was painted upon the sweatshirt in striking white. Luckily, a sweatshirt ideal for Barbatos hung beside Diavolo's - even their sweatshirts came in a pair. Compared to the prince's, the butler's wear was far simpler - a ketchup-colored sweatshirt with random festive patterns and words in white that read "I Can Get You On The Naughty List."

As you turned around to place the sweatshirts on your 'selected' pile, you noticed a small opening in the back of the store leading to a smaller room. With a bit of caution, you approached the area and stepped inside, instantly turning crimson-faced at the scene you beheld. Though the room's tone didn't quite fit the wholesome and family-friendly atmosphere of the store, you ventured further in regardless.

One particularly explicit piece caught your attention, and though you were uncomfortable, you couldn't look away. The emerald green sweatshirt had an image of an upwards penis on it, but only the bottom of the shaft and balls were visible. The upper half of the length was missing, indicating the wearer of the sweatshirt was a dick. On cue, Leviathan entered the room and followed your gaze to the sweater. He instantly jumped back and averted his gaze as his face turned a deep shade of scarlet. What had he walked into, and why were you here?

A playful smirk appeared on your lips when you saw his red cheeks. Noticing another risque sweater, you picked up the hanger and held it in front of you. The cloth had a hole near the chest, and out peeked a plastic boob with a carrot nose on the nipple and googly eyes on top.

"Oh, Levi," you mischievously smiled, and the second he glanced in your direction, you gently pressed your hand on the plastic breast and fondled it. The color of Levi's face could have put a tomato to shame, but he managed to pry his eyes from you. Unfortunately for him, his gaze landed on a sweater with the words "Kiss Under the Mistletoe" with a mistletoe hanging near the hip area of the fabric.

The image of him wearing the sweatshirt as you kneeled down in front of him plagued his mind, but he frantically shook his head to stop his mind from imagining anything further. 'Bad Levi. No, no, no. Don't go there.' His poor heart could not take any more teasing, so the demon turned on his heels and hurried back to the family-friendly area. Unknown to him, a devilish grin tugged on your lips.

Trying to distance himself from the heart-failing events that transpired, Levi's eyes darted from one sweater to another, but his breath remained shallow. In his peripheral vision, he spotted a cat and instantly selected the apparel for Satan. The dark green sweater was decorated with white stripes and a mix of red and green snowflakes across the sleeves. In the center was an image of a perpetually grumpy cat sitting in front of a red ornament, wearing a Santa hat. The words "Jingle All The Way To Hell" were inscribed in white above and below the image.

You walked behind Levi and chuckled at the grumpy cat, recalling how Satan looked while fuming earlier in the day. Ignoring Leviathan's quizzical look, as you didn't want to upset Satan but telling Levi his issues, you searched for the perfect sweaters for Mammon and Solomon. Even though the two of you had been in the store for a while, the teen cashier had yet to notice your presence.

The black sweatshirt you selected for Mammon had a rectangle bordered by a frame of vibrant red presents and green snowflakes. Within the frame were three green checkboxes, each with a distinct white typography. The first checkbox read "Nice," the second "Naughty," and the third "Innocent until proven guilty." A red checkmark was placed neatly inside the third checkbox. Contrasting Mammon's sweatshirt was Solomon's bright red sweater that had the words "Permanently On The Naughty List And Loving Every Minute Of It" in bold white letters.

With a sigh of relief, you sat the last sweater on your selected pile and scanned the store to find Levi. Who knew finding the perfect Christmas sweater could be this exhausting? He stood in the game-related Christmas sweaters section in hopes of finding one for him and you. But you beat him to it and handed him a dark blue sweater with colorful crewmates chaotically standing in the center and "Christmas is Among Us" written below them. "How about this one?"

"Then, will you wear this one?" Levi shyly asked as he showed you a pine green sweater with Pikachu happily sitting in the center, a heart above its head, and the words "All I Want For Christmas Is...CHUUU!!!" below and above the adorable Pokemon.

Your face grew warm as a light, rosy flush graced your cheeks. Leaning close to his face, you playfully brought your lips to his ears and whispered, "Let me try this on to make sure it fits."

The moment your warm breath caressed his ear, the air charged with anticipation. Your breath caused goosebumps to erupt on his skin while his pulse quickened at the thought of something more. He could only nod slightly as his eyes followed you to the changing room. But why were you going to the changing room in the dizzying part of the store? Feeling an unexplainable tug, he slowly dragged his feet toward the adult-themed section but kept his eyes on the walls, away from the explicit sweaters. His pants were still slightly tight from your teasing, and he didn't need them to get any tighter.

Every minute he waited for you felt like an eternity and only increased his temptation to peer at the sweaters to his left. Images of you caressing the plastic boob and kneeling in front of him to kiss under the mistletoe flashed before his eyes, but the demon forced himself to keep his thoughts clear. If his mind had an undo or erase button, Levi would have repeatedly slammed it.

"(Y/n), are you done yet?" He quietly asked and knocked on the changing room's door. No response. "(Y/n)? Are you okay?" His nervousness grew as he knocked louder a few more times.

In a panic, the Avatar of Envy flung the door open but froze when he saw you in front of the mirror with a mischievous smile. Though your back was turned to him, Levi saw the words on your sweater in the mirror's reflection: "Joy to the Touch." White gloves were painted over the dark blue fabric over your breasts as if fondling them. Heat surged through his body at the unwanted thoughts snuck into his mind once more.

"What are you waiting for, Levi?" You deliberately spoke in a slow and sultry voice, knowing you had successfully hit the hammer on the nail.

The demon closed the door and wrapped his arms around you from behind, yet he gave no kiss, nor did he whisper sweet nothings; instead, he buried his face in the curve of your neck with a frustrated groan. You suppressed your urge to laugh and took the lead, guiding his hands to your chest over the white gloves on the sweaters.

As he felt the softness of your mounds through the fabric, Levi pressed his heated face deeper into your skin, the feeling enough to send a jolt of passion through your body. His hands slowly released your mounds and slid down inch by inch to sneak beneath your sweater and bra, prompting a soft sigh to escape your parted lips.

"Hmm, Levi. I have waited for this for a long time," you purred.

Though he didn't reply, his trembling hands gently kneaded your supple curves and pinched your perked buds. You leaned back into him and closed your eyes, holding back the moans bubbling in your throat. Your mind was filled with thoughts of Levi hovering over you, his hips bucking against yours as you dug your nails into his flesh. You needed more. You needed him.

"Why don't we go somewhere more private and finish what we started?"

Levi was filled with desire as he saw the way your lips curved into a naughty grin. Your words sent a shiver up his spine, and he let out a lustful moan in response.

———————————————

➣  Please visit my website for the full masterlist!

[londonspirit]

When Our Flag Means Death first premiered, the pirate comedy series — a novel genre mashup in and of itself — didn't necessarily make a big splash in the streaming landscape. It didn't take long, however, for positive word of mouth and a slowly growing fanbase to lead to impressive viewing numbers, with the first season becoming the biggest new series in the U.S. across all platforms — and its popularity has only grown since. Now, on the precipice of the series' return, over a year after it was finally renewed for a second season, viewers are eagerly preparing to tune in to find out what will happen to Stede Bonnet (Rhys Darby), Edward Teach/Blackbeard (Taika Waititi), and the rest of the Revenge's crew now that everyone has been divided into two separated groups.

Ahead of the Season 2 premiere, Collider had the opportunity to speak to creator David Jenkins for a spoiler-free conversation (if you've checked out some of those trailers already, that is!) about what fans can expect. Over the course of the interview, which you can read below, Jenkins discusses when he found out the show would be renewed, the unprecedented response to Season 1, and why he enjoys engaging with the OFMD fandom online. He also digs into discussing why Season 2 takes a somewhat darker tone, the importance of adding more female characters to the cast, his envisioned story for the show's planned three seasons, and more.

COLLIDER: You made a whole season between now and the last time we spoke!

DAVID JENKINS: It was a long time ago. Here we are!

And I know it was a bit before we even knew that Season 2 was going to be a possibility. How long was that wait on your end?

JENKINS: Yeah, I blocked it out, if I'm honest. [Laughs] It was a minute. We're really lucky that they picked us up, and they've been really wonderful to us at Max. They're just very fun to make this show with. There was a minute where I would call it kind of a slow-burn fandom, and the show just seemed to grow and grow and grow. I think we became more and more viable as the weeks went by after the finale, and thank god we got to do it again.

With the response to Season 1, it felt like week after week, even once the whole season was out, there was just this exponential growth. What was your reaction to that? Has that ever happened to you before, in your experience?

JENKINS: Oh, it’s never happened to me. I don't know if it's happened to other shows. Somehow, I feel like the streaming of it makes this unusual, and then the fact that it is actually a romantic relationship between these two characters. Audiences didn't want to get burned again, and then saw that they weren't going to be, and celebrated it. It just really moved me, actually. I thought that they'd kiss, and people would be like, “Oh, cool, cool!” I kind of thought people would know a little bit more [about] where we were going, but then in hindsight, no, people have been hurt and burned on so many other shows and then made to feel silly. So it was very gratifying to see the show embraced — to see every element of the creative embraced, every element of the production design, every department get their due in attention, was just overwhelming. It's the honor of my professional life. I don't think this happens very often, so I'm just savoring it.

You don't always see creators who are willing to engage with the fandom online, or they try to keep a distance, but it feels like you're getting in there occasionally and interacting with fans. How do you feel about that particular response, the fandom and their passion?

JENKINS: It's an honor. If it were a different circumstance or a different property or something else that maybe had a different tone that brought in a more dyspeptic, less gracious [fandom]... Everyone's been lovely. When people are being nice and normal, easy to be around, yeah, I wanna be at that party. Are you kidding me? And then you're gonna celebrate all the work that we did when we didn't know if the show would be good? Because when you're making these things, you're like, “Well, I know this is just my weird thing. Maybe people like it, maybe they won't.” When people are this gracious and effusive and not weird about it, it's like, “Yeah, let's talk. This is great. You're a fan of the stuff that we were a fan of. We're not different.” So that's really rare.

In terms of the overall tone of Season 2, there's definitely a darkness that it starts with. Was it more of a conscious decision to embrace that side, or did it really inherently come from picking up with these characters after where we left off with them in Season 1?

JENKINS: It's picking up with where the arc is in the story. We're post-breakup, and they're trying to fix it. One of these characters is very, very damaged and has never made himself vulnerable in this way before, and I don't think [he] would react very well to having his heart broken in this way. I don't think it would be cute, and I don't think it would be funny. I think it would be scary as hell to watch a very damaged guy that we've established in Ed, who killed his dad and thinks he's not capable of being loved, deal with rejection and see that Stede really hurt him. It's important to do that, to give him stakes because Rhys [Darby] is adorable, and Taika [Waititi] can be adorable, and sometimes when they're being adorable, they become invulnerable. I want to see a love story between two people who are very vulnerable, for better and for worse. So you have to pick up in a place where there's been damage done and there's a price to pay, and then it's like, “Can they come back from it?”

That's not to say that there aren't moments of levity and comedy. Stede, from his perspective, is this more pining figure writing letters, but he's definitely not in the same mental or emotional space as Ed is at this point because he doesn't realize how hurt Ed is.

JENKINS: The lovely thing about Rhys and about Stede is Stede’s cluelessness. He eventually does the right thing, but he doesn't know his own strength, and that's his problem. Then he does damage, and then he has to repair that damage, and that's the growth of that character. Ed is a guy where you're like, “Wait a minute, you're invulnerable. You’re Blackbeard,” but then you see he's hurt, he's not getting up. To me, those are the natural journeys for those two characters. Then you see Ed come back, and he has to wear a bell around his neck, and he's gonna fix a lock on this door, and he's gonna learn to fish and just be a three-dimensional human as opposed to just a scary drawing. Those are the tensions of those guys, and that's why Rhys has dog energy, and Taika has cat, and that seems to go along with both of those arcs.

I wanted to ask you about one of the things that feels like a really nice addition to Season 2, which is just the number of female characters that we get for the crew to bounce off of.

JENKINS: Good, I’m glad you feel that way.

Leslie [Jones] is back, we get Minnie Driver, and there's a new female pirate captain who shifts the power dynamic, among others. Did that feel like a natural way to expand the cast, or was that a change that you really wanted to make after Season 1?

JENKINS: It felt like both. Watching Season 1 is like, “Oof, there’s a lot of dudes.” We do go into Jim's experience as a non-binary crew member and Jim's relationship with their mentor and mother figure. In Season 2, it felt important and also the most logical way to build the world out. So it was fun to add these characters, even one-offs like Hell-Cat Maggie, and be like, “There are so many different perspectives to bring into this show.” It just felt natural to do that.

What's your favorite needle drop that the show has used so far in Season 1, and which one are you excited for fans to get to in Season 2?

JENKINS: Season 2 is built around [Kate Bush's] “This Woman's Work,” and that was very early on. That was a little bit like [Fleetwood Mac's] “The Chain.” I knew I wanted to use that, clear it, script where it should go in the season. There's a couple of those where it takes a minute to get that song, and there's a lot of back and forth, and if you don't get it, there's not a real good replacement for it. In that first season, “The Chain” really worked. We could have found a different song, but “The Chain,” that really works there. Also, [Cat Stevens'] “Miles from Nowhere” at the end of the first season felt like the Stede Bonnet song with that version of “Miles from Nowhere.”

Season 2, Nina Simone makes a couple of appearances, and I just love the size and grandeur of what she's doing. She seems to fit with a really large fantasy show — obviously, she's Nina Simone — and what she's talking about and how she's expressing it up against this world is really exciting to me. I don't know why it works for me as much as it does, but it really moves me. She comes back at the end of the season with a different track, and I just love having her music up against these pictures.

I've seen quotes from you recently where you talked about how—fingers crossed—if there's a renewal, Season 3 would be the planned final ending for this show. Was that something that you always envisioned, that it would be three-and-done?

JENKINS: I think so. When Taika expressed interest in doing it, I was surprised. “Are you sure?” He was like, “Yeah, man. Yeah, I wanna do it.” I was like, “Okay, but it’s not limited. Can you do it for three seasons?” “Yeah.” “Really? Really, you'll do it for three seasons?” “Yeah, man. Yeah.” So my expectation was we're only gonna get Taika for three seasons. But beyond that, three is good for this show. The first season is about two emotionally underdeveloped men who are at about 14, 15, 16, emotionally. Season 2 is about them getting older and maybe, in terms of the relationship, being around 25 to maybe 30 by the end of the season. And then I think there's one more story to tell, and it's how does a relationship evolve? Where do we find them again in the third season? What are they dealing with? That's very interesting to me, and there is a big story that I'd like to tell there.

Our Flag Means Death Season 2 premieres with its first three episodes October 5 on Max, with two episodes dropping weekly thereafter leading up to the season finale on October 26.

[pikahlua]

I have a question

But I really want to ask just from a writing standpoint, no ships or anything

Do you like Izuku and Ochaco's development as possible (or probable? idk where Hori wanna go with that) romance?

Cause I appreciated it (even tho it felt like the usual shonen romance) till the return of Izuku to UA, which made me see them more as platonic (and made me appreciate their bond way more tbh)

So from a writing standpoint, I'm not exactly a romance aficionado. It can really only come down to my preferences in what I like in a romance, but there are just some cheesy romance tropes I'm not into. I do think it's perfectly viable to analyze any relationship in any property, MHA included, for whatever dynamic you want. If you ask me to take a look at the potential romance in Izuku and Ochako's relationship, I can do that.

That said, this is a warning to hard-line IzuOcha shippers: I can't guarantee you'll enjoy everything I write about in this post.

To me, there are five major "sagas" in their relationship. Some of these I like, some of these I don't.

Saga 1: Beginning through the Internships Saga 2: Final Exams through Kamino Saga 3: Provisional License Exam through School Cultural Festival Saga 4: Joint Training Arc through Paranormal Liberation War Saga 5: Deku Retrieval Arc through to the present

Saga 1 was my favorite. This was when they were still getting to know each other and becoming friends. I like this part best because Ochako has the most characterization in the show. Her personality shines through and she's very entertaining. I also thought the stuff that happened between them in the Sports Festival was some of the most refreshing writing of opposite-sex characters I've seen in a while, platonic or romantic. Ochako has personal motivations that can be in conflict or in harmony with her relationship with Izuku, and the manner in which they interacted showed a special type of relationship for Izuku that he didn't have with any other character. It was nice variety in the context of everything else the show was giving us at the time. I wasn't necessarily dying for romance, because I do love a good platonic opposite-sex friendship too. But if it did take a romantic direction, I was excited to see how it went at the time.

Saga 2 just felt like it shoehorned the crush thing in there. It didn't really come from anything that came before it. I thought it was gonna be a good opportunity for some romantic humor, but it just turned out to be a bunch of embarrassed blushing and not much else. Wasn't really my thing.

Saga 3 tried to add something interesting to the mix with Ochako's jealousy which she tries to deny and squash, but...it doesn't come across as particularly deep or well-developed. Horikoshi kinda just throws it out there and then immediately ditches it. I wouldn't have been so annoyed if it didn't encompass all of Ochako's character for this saga. She didn't really do much of anything else at all. Even in the Overhaul arc, she didn't get any meaningful spotlight, and I mean this from an action perspective. After the awesome action she got in the Sports Festival, Horikoshi really pulled back on her and it felt like he was too afraid to make her get dirty and fight again, save for a brief moment when she pinned Toga in the woods at summer camp. I liked it better when Izuku was pining a bit after Ochako than the other way around.

Saga 4 was a bit better. There was finally some meaningful development between them with Ochako getting inspired to update her costume, saving Izuku as a development of her new character question of "who saves the heroes?", and--my favorite part--when she decides to trust Izuku when he says he can take Shinso on alone and she goes to take care of business elsewhere. But I notice these developments I like also happen to have non-romantic elements to them. It's really just when things are one-dimensionally romantic that I'm super disinterested. I like the complexity of other feelings even in their easy friendship. Platonic friendship that leads into budding romance brings at least a bit more flavor in the writing. That said, it's not a whole ton of flavor. I can see why other people would like it, but it's not the MOST exciting for me personally.

Saga 5 is again more exciting to me because of the non-romantic elements, kind of like you say. It's not that it's necessarily platonic, but it's just more interesting that Ochako's feelings seem more complicated now, and Toga has been added to the mix too. What we get in this saga especially puts me in a weird position where I'm rooting for Izuku and Ochako NOT to get together in the end, not because I don't like them or have a problem with the ship, but because it makes the overall story about their relationship since the beginning..."make sense" isn't the right phrase. It's just an interesting take on the trope in this genre. I really like the message it could potentially deliver on. I'm just not a big romance person in the first place, so the whole "there are even deeper things happening between people than just high school crushes" angle that doesn't necessarily mean romance speaks more to me. I don't really know what we get out of them getting together if that happens. But, as I said, I'm not big on romance to begin with, so I'm not the best judge of this. It could be we get a great message out of it and I'm just really bad at being able to see that at this stage. I will still be forced to lament what was lost in that case, though--because we would lose the far more interesting take on the trope if they were not to get together.

And that's why I say I'm not anti-IzuOcha, just anti-IzuOcha in canon. I think they're cute together and I really love their earlier dynamic. I think the fanart of them is cute. I love when they get along doing things. I love when people create excellent fan content for their favorite pairings. I just most like the idea of an ending where they don't end up together for the purposes of my own intrigue.

[thrawns-backrest]

I decided to bring a pretty crazy thing here, hehe.

There is a popular series of books in Russia that is not very well known abroad. The idea is that in this world there are cyborgs that look like ordinary people, but are sold as machines. There are combat cyborgs, nanny cyborgs, etc. In general, these are truly machines, but some cyborgs (combats and spies) can acquire human feelings and personality from a time - they are called “thwarted” and are immediately destroyed when discovered. It is totally legally. But there are people who, contrary to the general trend, are kind to such creatures and help them hide, accept them as friends and family members, or even fight for their rights.

So, I've been thinking for a long time about an AU in which Ronan is not human. He is one of those machines that has gained mind, which was noticed by his owner. In a panic (because thwarted cyborgs are often aggressive, as a rule, there are reasons for this, but people don’t care about it), he used cruelty, but did not call a special team to destroy the “thwarted” cyborgs, because he thought that his “machine” is no longer viable because of him, so to speak. So he just threw it out of sight. However, Krennic, who was probably just relaxing while hanging around the city, came across a cyborg who was still alive. He understood what was happening, but for some reason decided not to report it to the appropriate place or simply leave it. He found a specialist who could fix the cyborg, and then helped him pretend to be a human and join the Empire as his assistant (after all, this guy will definitely be forever grateful to him and will do anything for him, right?). I have two options for what could happen next:

1) In Ronan's Ascendancy recruitment scene, Thrawn would have caught him not hating Palpatine, but by recognizing who he really was. Krennic would make sure Ronan didn't give himself away even to the most powerful scanners and so on, but hey, Thrawn can't be fooled!

2) The scene from Treason would have gone the same way as in the canon, but later (I did not think through this moment in detail) a situation would have been created where Ronan again ended up on the Chimera or in another imperial facility. It would create a situation where, in order to protect everyone, he would have to give himself away and use his potential as a machine to repel an attack that could not be stopped in any other way. Ronan would be sure that now he would either be destroyed or simply kicked out in disgrace, but, as we know, Thrawn is not one of those who judge by origin. He would have allowed him to stay… which earned him eternal devotion, in fact, but Ronan still continued to bark at him, so as not to give away a change in his attitude simply out of stubbornness :D

okay first of all, sorry for how late this is lol, secondly THIS GIVES ME SUCH STRONG DETROIT BECOME HUMAN VIBES HOLY SHIT. I don't know if you've heard of dbh but it has a similar premise and I was obsessed with it for a while. the reason I'm bringing this up is because in dbh androids had little circular led lights on the side of their head which would glow blue for stable, yellow for strained and red for instability. and when they became deviant (gained consciousness) the lights would correspond to their emotions and mood. anyway this whole tangent is to say that if Ronan was an android his led would be red all the time and it would be hilarious

now back on track

I REALLY love this idea, the image of Ronan standing quietly while Krennic pokes around inside some open panel to do some maintenance instantly popped into my mind. And it's in character for Krennic to take advantage of this opportunity to cultivate a loyal subordinate (plus he'll have his very own life size doll to play dress up with lol). Maybe they even had this long period where Ronan was still a bit beat up and missing some parts so he couldn't walk around in public. And in that interim he only knew the person who cared for and helped fix him, namely Krennic.

both of these scenarios work really well! in fact one way Thrawn could catch him is thanks to his infrared vision, a machine could possibly simulate human body heat but with the amount of attention Thrawn pays to it, he would have figured out something was off eventually. This scenario could also work alongside canon, I think. Thrawn could use this as additional blackmail to Ronan's beliefs (imagine if that's what made Vader even more dangerous to him, he would instantly recognize he's not looking at a human because of the Force). Another candidate for figuring it out would be Dayja because our boy is so clever - he'd probably postpone bringing it up because the most valuable information is the one only you know and by the time he decides to do something with it, Ronan would already have been spirited away to the Ascendancy.

And oooh the second one is interesting! One thing that instantly comes to mind (totally not because I've considered it a thousand times for dbh fics haha) is that machines can probably sustain a lot more damage than humans so they could step into the line of fire to protect one. Even just getting injured would give him away which makes the scene on the Firedrake all the more interesting because Ronan came within an inch of getting shot which in this case would have given him away in front of everyone.

"but Ronan still continued to bark at him, so as not to give away a change in his attitude simply out of stubbornness" LOL Ronan's cat like attitude strikes again! He acts like he hates his master but really he's actually very loyal. It's even funnier because Krennic is that one 'owner' that the cat sucks up to and no one even knows why. Only the cat.

[chounaifu]

👽 AUs 📲 doubles ⛓ RP timelines

Rex RP Opinions || @picavecalyx

AUs

I love AUs! I am not sure what happened between now, and when I left the RPC a few years ago, but it seems as though nobody is really writing AUs anymore. Or, at least, not in roleplay, because I see them pretty frequently in fanfiction. Being able to pick up a character and put them into an alternative setting is so much fun, and the character can really surprise you with how they operate in those situations. Being completely honest, my retelling of Proton and Lusamine are so off the wall, they likely fall into the category of AU versions of the characters. And that's completely fine, because my Guzma was VERY, VERY AU, so much to the point where people set up their own verses in order to interact with my AU version of Skull. It's just how I enjoy writing. But yes, I'd really like to see people returning to writing AUs again. Olive keeps talking to me about her android AU, and the ghost hunter AU, and I want both. Immediately.

Doubles

I've never been the type to have doubles anxiety. If anything, I always jump at the chance to interact with people who are writing the same muse as me. In my mind, if we have both chosen to pick up the same character, then it is likely that we are going to have something in common, and we could be great friends. Plus, I love hearing about how other people write the characters that I love. Going further, there's plenty of times where I've had my muse interact with their double-- especially in Pokémon, where multiple timelines canonically exist, alongside dimension jumping and time travel. Doubles are so viable in this setting. That being said, I understand why people have doubles anxiety. On the other side of the doubles conversation, I have no problem writing with multiple versions of the same muse, across different muns. As a Proton writer, I can't begin to tell you how many different versions of Gold, Silver, Giovanni and the executives that I've written with. EASILY a dozen or so of each, maybe even more. Everyone has a different way of portraying a character, so, I like to give myself the opportunity to see how MY muses interact with the different tellings.

RP Timelines

I have a timeline of events for my muses, but, I'm not locked into a linear timeline. Time does not pass the way it does in real life. I jump around, I'll be writing something in Proton's past one day, and then something in Proton's future another day. I know a lot of people implement the passage of real time on their blogs, but, I cannot do that, it doesn't click with me, and it doesn't fit well with the way that I write, nor is it accommodating for my busy schedule. But, of course, if that is important to my RP partner, I will 100% respect that and adhere to the time passage as much as I can when writing with them.

[doubleddenden]

I've been thinking. Jirard The Completionist buying up all of the Wii U and 3DS eshop games and donating them to video game historians is a massive step towards game preservation. That is definitely something impressive he did

But now I'm just thinking of those games that got pulled before he was finished. Before he started even.

He shouldn't have had to spend $24k on this just to preserve them.

Honestly I really think that if a game company is not going to make a reasonable method of legally obtaining a game through traditional means without having to resort to hundreds or thousands of dollars through second hand, they should be free to emulate and available through libraries of some kind. Hell I'll go a step further and say that any game over 10 years of release should be free and legal to emulate.

I know lawmakers and a lot of society may not understand why it's such a big deal, but video games have just as big of an impact on society as books, music, and movies. I'd argue that it's a marriage of the three+ user interaction that really adds a degree of personalization you just can't get from the others unless you've had a personal hand in creating them. A lot of culture has changed and been affected by games- and hell, games even give people the opportunity to interact with the past in a historical or meta sense. RDR2 for instance gives you a small glimpse of life back in the later 1800s, and Donkey Kong Arcade machines are literally historical pieces from an era before house-hold gaming was really viable.

And you know the really, really terrible thing out of this? The data from Jirard's spree is under 2 terabytes. That's not even a server at that point. That's literally a few modern games. They literally had them contained in a few external hard drives and SD cards. Was that really that hard to keep operational? To me, this is just Nintendo ensuring they can port these to the Switch and beyond for a higher price, or worse- sweep some under the rug forever.

Pirating imo has done more for game conservation than Nintendo ever has tbh.

In that light, I think a few things should okay, legal, and done:

1. If a game is no longer available to purchase by reasonable means on modern consoles for a reasonable price without having to resort to price gouged second hand sales, it should be legally free to download, distribute, and emulate

2. If a game console with specific specs is no longer available to customers via reasonable means, it should be legal to emulate on pc or legal to replicate the tech required to do so for a reasonable price. Think like the Retron 5, but for Wii, GameCube, DS, 3DS, and WiiU.

3. There should be fun and accessible museums dedicated to the preservation of older games and other entertainment media, and provide access to those that wish to experience the games as originally intended. Located not just in big cities in California or NYC, but also in smaller cities and states/countries across the globe.

4. From this point onward, there needs to be a larger effort to ensure backwards capability of older games on modern consoles. That means going forward, something like what happens after the Switch needs to be able to support Switch games as well as new ones. For disc based games especially, would it really be that hard to program a ps5 to run a ps2 disc through an internal emulator?

If the tech is no longer being made to play these, and if the old tech or old games are deteriorating, the very least that can be done is to ensure the old still can live on somehow with the new.

[autumnbrambleagain]

as much as i love qud there's no feeling... gggggreater than dying in one round to something and even on roleplay mode looking at your last checkpoint and it's so far away you might as WELL start over

but oh my god. oh my god do you know how many times ive done the opening 3 hours of a qud run.

the first 3 hours of a qud run are the most boring hours of a qud run and the sultans and the factions and the cool things you've found all run together across a dozen runs and when you finally get a run you stick with it turns out it was the most boring of all the runs you've had, no interesting sultans no weird relics you found it was just the one where you played conservatively enough and did the knicknack-->six day stilt-->bey lah free level circuit and you emerge from your fugue state in a viable run and have to go

well shit what villages exist what factions exist are there any interesting sultans oh nevermind i got one shot again

i remember when i banned myself from playing roguelikes, tbh. when you're having a shitty time, getting a surprise "haha, the last hour didn't happen" can really fuck up your night

from a game design perspective, it's why i always prefer punishing loss in a way that creates more story or applies in-game penalties. reloading to 5 minutes ago means you're essentially immortal anyway. dying permanently means... well, that just punishes the player. undoing an hour of gameplay just punishes me, actually me, in real life. it means the progress i was making and the plans i was making were for nothing, the digital Stuff i got was for nothing, and, i'll be honest, the first few hours of qud are so samey it isn't like i have unique, memorable experiences to take from it either. it just voids out time of my actual life.

i mean. sure, if i lose please come over and smash my hands and cut off one of my legs to really teach me a lesson, kinda hot ngl. but like. sorta weird.

but it's a very strange kind of bdsm where you make a mistake in a game and your electric dommymommy goes "i'm going to make you do ALL of that all over again. i hope you like killing 50 snapjaws with a stick >:3"

kenshi, and the timely escape mod for morrowind, really do loss WELL. in kenshi, loss is a twist, an unexpected turn in your story that will give you new motivations or challenges or opportunities. loss isn't game over, it redirects the entire flow of the game and the characters' story and it can be tragic and it can be motivational, it's great.

in the timely escape mod in morrowind, dying loses you stats, and with ther ight leveling mods that can be absolutely brutal as a penalty, so it encourages safe play but doesn't reduce it to either of the extremes. it's customizable so you can set it to a level you find punishing but not "well this character's dead"

anyway time to go run to the six day stilt and then go save bey lah and then run back to joppa in a cosmic multi-thread god-entity fugue state of dimension bleeding splicing timelines together until i come to in a frantic haze and realize this run is for real and oh god what reality am i in who are these people whose blood is this on me this time what am i even holding

that is how the brambled fae experiences reality in the proselytize fanfic don't worry it's VERY sane i promise no worries

[plungelo]

week IV

indestructibility is a concept i brought up in a conversation the other night and it's something i've only thought to myself but never put into writing. i'm writing about it now to figure out what it actually is, beyond just a word. this is very tangential and veers to and from the point.

my first way of verbalizing indestructibility was to call it "emotional indestructibility" because i knew it had to do with the way i react to things that emotionally affect me. just on the words alone, i think emotional indestructibility sounds like a really bad thing. the words make it sound like its about cutting yourself off from the emotions you have, and that, if indestructibility is your goal, being impervious and stoic to everything around you is a good thing. i think stoicism is definitely a viable way to move through life, but given the love i have for my material being and the emotions and sensations its able to experience, i really don't like the idea of not reacting to things.

months ago i said to myself that, upon moving to the city, i would need to be indestructible in order to [[someone across the street from me is watching the first transformers movie, now i really want to rewatch that]] stay sane after a summer and spring of committed emotional vulnerability and a general philosophy of allowing anything into my mind and running with it. the city presents so much more opportunity for thought and so many things and people are apart of your attention all of time, therefore if i were to be as emotionally/mentally vulnerable all the time, all of the urban stimuli might overwhelm/excite me way too much. so i wanted to be 'indestructible' in order to stop bullshit from affecting me. but by looking back on the last few months, it's clear that the way i pursued indestructibility was just by tuning out the reality around me by blasting music through my headphones or passing the hours by watching bullshit youtube videos––things i rarely felt compelled to do before i moved back to the city. repeatedly tuning out has kind of disconnected me with what's materially happening around me, and i think it's personally a bad method of indestructibility––and a somewhat wasteful method of living in general.

{tangent on tuning out:

it should be said, though, that tuning out can be really great, and necessary in the city. how could anyone be expected to be subjected to a 30 minute train ride with no headphones? it can be an opportunity to explore music, to learn more about your craft, maybe to interact with people online in some way. listening to music, learning, and interacting with people are all incredibly positive things that we should be trying to do. they make us feel fulfilled. but like anything that releases feel-good chemicals into our bodies, these activities can be over-done.

it's in the moments when city life forces me to tune out that i learn a lot about an artist or listen to an album. but then after i get off the train, and into my room, and at my desk. and on my computer, i can basically do it for as long as i want. by constantly giving myself rewards like another episode of King of the Hill or another Broey Deschanel video essay or some time scrolling through Instagram, i feel like i'm reducing the act of being entertained, learning, or socializing to something that can be done with just my fingers on a keyboard and my eyes on a screen. it's far more effective to be engaging with those things through material experience.

this reduction makes me far too used to these concepts and reward systems. therefore, in real life, i am starting to feel numb to a lot of experiences. or, conversely, i can feel easily overwhelmed and lost in certain mundane circumstances. my emotional vulnerability has felt so low over the past few months. its declining presence tracks with my general disposition, i think. i do not want to be this kind of indestructible.}

the kind of indestructibility i had in mind when conceiving of it for myself was not one of emotional detachment or numbness. it was one that allowed me to be vulnerable to everything that threw itself my way. i had to receive every thing as intensely as possible in order to see the truth of it. by being able to see more in every thing i could have a better understanding of the distinction between some thing that should actually emotionally affect (from extremely negatively to extremely positively) me and some thing that is out of my control and thus not worth investing energy into.

for example: projection. everyone talks about projection nowadays and for good reason. i do believe that everything we do and the way we perceive what's around us is always extension of ourselves, for better or for worse. part of what i saw as indestructibility upon moving to the city was making sure that i kept my mind clever/secure enough to be able to distinguish between things people project onto me versus things that should actually be important to my thinking process and incorporated into the ongoing and never-ending development of my sense of self.

when someone projects something onto me*, they are an exterior force that is completely out of my control making a judgement on my character. therefore, what they say to me should not be allowed to influence my own perception of my character. but what i've realized is that it's really fuckin hard to find where the line between projection and accurate identification is.

plus, such a massive part of coming to an understanding of my sense of self over the last year and half has been accepting that other people play a huge role in who i am. we are all collages of those who raise us, those who befriend us, those who betray us, and even the people passing through. so when a judgement or identification (negative or positive) is made on who i am by another person––especially one i care about––i immediately believe it and accept it as a part of myself.

projection is just one example of being affected by something exterior.

i know that i play the main role in understanding and expressing my sense of self. but regardless of that, i am a product of what existence has impressed upon me for the many days i've been in it. when i wanted to be indestructible at the start of my time here, i didn't want to put up walls and not experience anything. i think i just wanted a better filter for what should be allowed to play a part in who i am. filtration is maybe a better concept than indestructibility. yeah.

is filtering also bad? is my automatic acceptance of everything around me as a part of myself problematic to my sense of self? should i really rewatch the transformers movie? these are all questions left to answer, but at least i've worked through a word and can move forward.

*i hope i'm not making it sound like a bunch of people are judging me to my face all the time. the people around me really are generally awesome.

[sorchaivy]

Tags from TriaElf9's reply (image description in Alt text):

I can imagine that you got lots of messages, I'm glad mine was helpful.

I do absolutely agree with you that the minimal spread of information and the quality of reporting have both been... lacklustre, at best.

I saw the TikTok videos you shared on Twitter, and part 2 discussed the media reporting. The Tokker rightfully called out the lack of media interrogation of reports, and the almost wilful parroting of PR talking points from Norfolk Southern representatives - talking points which are clearly geared at minimising damage to the company, not taking ownership or responsibility for causing the disaster or mitigating the effects on people and environment.

I didn't bring it up in the ask because it was slightly tangential to an already overlong message, but I'm really glad you addressed it in your response.

In terms of the quality of the reporting itself, I'm deeply disappointed that most mainstream media has continuously failed to interrogate the narrative offered by parties with clear vested interest or outright conflict of interest, instead parroting the talking points as impartial, factual news. And - far more concerning - when individual journalists do speak out and question the proffered narrative, they are silenced by increasingly overt methods:

https://www.weau.com/2023/02/11/ohio-attorney-general-lead-investigation-into-reporters-arrest/?outputType=amp

To be fair, the Ohio state governor has reportedly disavowed the arrest and jailing of the journalist. But the fact that the arrest happened at all is deeply concerning, and another red flag regarding the increasingly fascistic and authoritarian methods used by police across all jurisdictions in the US.

The effect on the quality of investigative reporting is likely to be that more journalists are discouraged from doing their jobs properly and instead cling to the sanctioned messaging by spokespersons for the companies and governments responsible for things like this. Which means that the reporting will become less reliable.

As for the slow spread of the reporting, I do genuinely wonder whether part of the reason for the slow dissemination of the news about this outside of the immediate Ohio and Pennsylvania area is the continued deterioration of Twitter's algorithm and functionality. It was such a reliable and useful vehicle for spreading and fact-checking information for enough years that we're unused to keeping other, less convenient channels of information open.

I know that Twitter's deterioration is a sore spot for TriaElf9 (I don't claim enough familiarity to just call you Tria) and many other independent creatives, so I do apologise for bringing up such a painful and depressing topic. Especially because I don't really have any solutions.

Twitter was an excellent vehicle for spreading news quickly outside of increasingly unreliable mainstream media channels, as well as an excellent tool for creatives to network, promote their work and secure new opportunities. Then a shitty, insecure billionaire and would-be oligarchical despot treated it as the world's most expensive red-sportscar midlife-crisis impulse purchase, and immediately began dismantling everything good about it, too quickly for us to develop alternatives.

And I think this disaster, coupled with the massive earthquakes in Turkey and Syria, really demonstrates just how far the algorithm has deteriorated. And how urgently we need a separate, reliable and widely available platform to spread news and check facts. I don't have a useful suggestion for viable alternatives, and for that I apologise.

I am also posting from outside the US and a very different timezone (Australian east coast, here, two hours ahead of most of Japan), so I do sympathise with your frustration at how difficult it can be to get news in a timely manner - especially with so many outlets using cursed paywalls.

Tumblr user ms-demeanour reblogged the post with a useful link to a Daily Beast news aggregator that might be helpful?

https://www.thedailybeast.com/

Though, looking at it, I'm not sure about the reliability of the reporting. It might be more of a launching point for further research rather than a useful firsthand tool. And if folks are time-poor, that's not feasible.

Anyway, I'm not sure I have a point, exactly, beyond wanting to say that I hear your frustration and helplessness, I share your hopes and fears regarding this latest disaster, and I hope that everyone you care for is safe from both the immediate effects and any aftermath.

FYI re the toxic chemical event and train derailment post. OP's initial post has been fact-checked and found to be inaccurate, hyperbolic and alarmist. While the spill, the fire and the chemical fallout IS absolutely catastrophic and awful, it's unclear how likely the scenario laid out in OP's post is. Most experts following updates from the EPA website have tended more towards "bad, but not life-extinguishing and not likely to be as far-reaching as initially feared".

It's infuriating that the derailment and extent of the damage was preventable and indeed that this is exactly what the rail unions were trying to stand against and highlight as recently as last November. This is an horrific environmental disaster caused almost solely by capitalism and corporate greed, cutting corners and sacrificing maintenance and regulatory adherence for the sake of maximising profits.

But it is probably not quite as bad as OP made out, and their catastrophising and spreading of alarmist misinformation isn't going to help the people of East Palestine, nor the unions and environmentalists fighting for better regulation and working conditions to prevent further environmental disasters.

For anyone who can afford to and wants to help, there's a reputable GoFundMe that seeks to provide relief funds to the residents of East Palestine to help ensure access to safe drinking water and financial relief following the recent evacuation and associated loss of income and additional expenses:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/relief-for-east-palestine-after-train-derailment

I've gotten a number of messages on this, but this is the one I'm sharing b/c it acknowledges that it's an issue outside of just the chemical aspect of it (which is why I shared the post) but also gives a way for us to help. Thank you for this message!

My main issue with this all is that the news coming out of this IS so slow and so varied in info (everything I've seen says something different) b/c I'm used to hearing about this sort of thing the day it happens, or at least within the week, but given twitter shit and the state of online news sharing, I feel like we're being let down in terms of media coverage, for those of us not in the area. To be clear, not all of us live in America, or have access to American TV and news coverage (especially b/c so much is region or paywall locked nowadays), but have family there and care about folks in the area.

I really do hope it's not as bad as initially feared, but I get why people could be panicking, given how recently those in charge have been...pretty shitty about handling recent bad situations *cough pandemic cough*

I do appreciate the heads up, as it's important to get all the information we can, but it's very difficult when we CAN'T get all the information, when it's getting harder to verify even media sources, and when this sort of thing isn't really clear about fallout until years later.

But I understand folks getting frustrated at the spread of misinformation. It was same for the Fukushima situation when no one here bothered to check up on any of the info of that, and Western media wasn't really reporting anything other than worst case senario.

We're all susceptible to misinformation!

Also, if I don't answer right away, you don't need to send more messages, time zones are a thing, and I live in Japan so I'm likely not awake ^_^;;

[multimetaverse]

HSMTMTS 2x08 Review

Most Likely To was the best ep of S2 so far and ended one ship while launching another. Let’s dig in!

Gaston was super fun, a very nice showcase for both Larry and Matt. This is the kind of energy that early S2 was lacking. Also feels like the first ep where East High might actually have a shot at beating North High. Covid restrictions played a role but we really needed to see more rehearsal scenes and scenes of the wildcats just being theatre kids. This also may be one of the last times we see EJ perform as a student in the musical so I’m glad we got this.  

EJ has been criminally underused for most of S2, he’s marketed as part of the big 4 along with Nini, Ricky, and Gina and Matt Cornett’s name is listed 3rd in the credits but in the early eps of S2 you’d think he was guest star. Lately he’s started to become more important and tonight was an excellent showcase of why he’s such an interesting character. I’m not gonna check but this feels like it’s the most EJ screen time in a single ep that we’ve gotten all season long. 

Of course, the main reason for EJ’s increased screen time is because of Portwell. I’ve been neutral on them but tonight they really won me over’ their scenes were so sweet that they warmed even my cold black heart. Matt and Sofia are good friends irl and that shines through in their easy rapport and great chemistry. Gina snorting at EJ’s joke was cute and I loved the shot of Gina accidentally walking into the shot for EJ’s confessional. As an aside, they’ve been doing some fun stuff with the confessionals lately which helps add a bit of the metaness that helped make S1 so great.

The real big Portwell scene tonight was EJ and Gina talking on the couch at Ashlyn’s. Lot’s to love there. Gina’s speech to EJ about what she sees when she thinks of him was sweet and her saying that EJ tried to do the right thing and often failed but kept trying echoes what she said of herself during her confession to Ricky. Also when EJ asked Gina if she understood the feeling of having her life mapped out she replied, ‘’not really’’ which is almost certainly the inspiration for Gina asking a question to EJ and him responding ‘’not really’’ in their pre S2 face time call on the hsmtmts instagram. 

EJ is still wracked with guilt for the guy he used to be but Gina reminds him that he’s grown and is a good guy which leads to her slip up about her seeing him that way vs the rest of the gang hinting that she’s beginning to catch feelings for EJ. Which leads to EJ complimenting her and them having a moment that could well have led to a kiss if Ashlyn hadn’t come home. And they cap it off with Gina falling asleep and EJ covering her with his Duke sweater. 

It’s been nice not seeing Gina upset over Ricky these past two eps and it’s a damning indictment of the poor writing and pacing of S2 that her story in the first 6 eps can be summed up as Gina being upset over something Ricky said or did. Not only has Portwell allowed EJ to rise in prominence but also it’s allowed Gina to escape the rut her character was stuck in pining for Ricky. 

I hope after S2 is over that we get an interview where Tim explains how the Portwell plot came to be. The S1 finale set up some possible interest between them as did the pre S2 face time call but nothing came of it during the first 4 eps, they stood next to each other a lot but barely interacted otherwise. Notably in 2x01, which Tim himself wrote, EJ tries to grow a beard and tells Ashlyn that he says her as so young which is extremely jarring now that we know that EJ is crushing on Gina who is Ashlyn’s age. 

Was Tim not set on doing Portwell until he realized he needed to give Gina something else to do other than hopelessly pine for Ricky? Narratively, it made sense after Rini got together in S1 to put the other two Big 4 characters together in S2 but did Tim not want it to seem so obvious to the audience so he deliberately kept Portwell apart until 2x05 where EJ’s feelings make for a nice plot twist? Was he just reluctant to plug EJ back into the love square due to how much more complicated it would make things but later felt he had no other options? Or was it just plain old bad pacing and writing?

Of course, I wish that there wasn’t such a large age gap between Sofia and Matt but there are no Gina ships that avoid that problem, there’s also an age gap between Sofia and Joshua, just as there was between Olivia and Joshua and Matt in S1. Depending on when they film S3 there’s a good chance that most of it will be finished before Sofia even turns 18 which is deeply unfortunate. There’s a broader issue of teen girls being cast in mostly age appropriate roles while their male love interests are older adults and in particular it often affects female characters of colour. Netflix has a really bad track record with those kind of age gaps but Disney has problems too as we’ve seen on HSMTMTS and on GMW where by the end of S3 they had 18 year old Peyton Meyer as the boyfriend of 14 year old Rowan Blanchard’s character (not to mention canon Joshaya which didn’t have such a bad age gap between the actors but was problematic regarding the ages of the characters themselves).

A knock I’ve seen on Portwell is that EJ is just gonna leave for university next year but that was never gonna happen, Matt’s under the same 4 season contract as all the other mains and he’ll be sticking around in some capacity much like Sharpay ended up doing in the movies. It is true that EJ will probably have to move on at the end of S4 while Gina still has her senior year left but that will also happen with her and Ricky since he’ll be graduating at the end of S4. It was a big mistake to make EJ a senior but it also may end up being a big mistake to make Gina a sophomore. It would have been too messy to retcon EJ to be a junior but Tim probably should have taken the chance to retcon Gina into being a junior in S2.

That Rini breakup was so sad (missed opportunity for gotta go my own way). They managed to get in a Troyella reference with the treehouse. This was inevitable they just have not been communicating well though now that we know that Ricky thought Nini left YAC for him some of his desperation to spend as much time together as possible makes more sense. I think Rini is endgame if the series has 4 seasons but it wouldn't shock me if we never seem them dating again and they only get back together in the series finale. It also wouldn’t surprise me if Nini never dates anyone else for the remainder of the series or at least not seriously. 

We’re not even halfway through the series so it’s way too early to permanently slam the door on Rini though this time apart will probably help Joshua and Olivia move on from their own bitter break up before it bleeds too much into their performances. I do wonder if Tim really has a clue what he's gonna do with them for the remaining 24-28 eps of the series, assuming S3 and S4 have 10-12 eps each. 

Roman Banks killed If I Can’t Love Her and the montage of all the couples or ex couples was great.

It was nice to finally meets some parents other than the Bowen’s and Salazar-Roberts’. Kourtney’s mom was played by Dara’s actual mother and their dynamic was great as expected. It seems from their conversation that Kourtney's father is dead which I don’t believe has been mentioned before. Cash Caswell.... well it gets what the character is about across. He really looks and sounds like a rich Utah republican, I bet he knows Mitt Romney personally. I liked EJ going to tell his father that he’s not going to Duke and recognizing that he wants to build his own life on his own merits. 

We saw a bit of that S1 Miss Jenn energy tonight which was fun though I didn't like how curt she was with Seb nor did I like how rude Carlos was to Seb although we know that blows up in 2x10. 

Jazzara rising! I really liked how Jazzara and Portwell are sort of mirroring each other and since Mazzara knows about EJ’s feelings for Gina it wouldn’t shock me if helping EJ out is part of him showing a softer side in 2x12.

Of course Ashlyn is VP of the Nostradamus society. It's clear her family has some kooky new age beliefs (her parents are probably members of some naturopathic medicine group on Facebook that doubles as a gateway into Qanon)

It was nice to see Big Red being such a good friend to Ricky and the return of Ricky’s infamous pillow hugs. Lmao at Ashlyn just chilling while Big Red is comforting Ricky

Also Miss Jenn saying sexy and Big Red referring to pillow talk, the writers are adding a bit of spice when cooking up these scripts.

Looking Ahead: 

Looks like Gina may be wearing EJ's duke sweater next ep according to some posts I saw. Jack presumably is there to somehow help Gina decide what she wants with Ricky and EJ though him having wanderlust might also feed into Gina’s thoughts on settling down in SLC or moving with her mom around the country.

Let's see what mom of the year, Lynne Bowen, has up her sleeves. Ricky’s bedroom at her place in Chicago looks much nicer than the apartment Mike Bowen has so perhaps she makes a lot more money than he does. 

Not looking forward to the Zoom portions of the ep but I guess it was inevitable. 

There’s only two paths for Gina’s story to go in the remainder of this season; either she decides to move on from Ricky and give EJ a chance or she decides that Ricky is worth trying again and squelches her budding feelings for EJ. The former looks much more likely after tonight’s ep but either way it needs to be handled with care. Inevitably Gina and Ricky need to talk about what happened between them but if Tim really wants Ricky to continue being a viable love interest or even a good friend to Gina then he needs to really have Ricky apologize and show a thoughtful, kinder side of him that’s largely been missing this season. 

What I think Tim is doing is setting up Portwell getting together in 2x12 but Ricky pining over Gina until Portwell break up late S3 and Rina get together in the S3 finale before they break up later in S4 and Ricky gets back with Nini near the end of the series. If I had Tim’s ear I would tell him that he should pick which ship he wants to do, Rina or Portwell, but don’t do both. He wants canon Rina? Great then end Portwell before it starts and have Rina happen in S3 and introduce other obstacles to them getting together rather than having to damage EJ’s character and make him lose another girl he likes to Ricky. He wants canon Portwell? Great then have Gina and Ricky’s conversation be closure for the both of them and have Gina and EJ get together and break them up without Ricky being a cause of it or waiting in the wings to get with Gina soon afterwards. Doing both will be a disaster and I truly hope that Tim Federle carefully thinks over his mistakes in S2 and really plans out the remaining 2 seasons of the series while there’s still time to prevent things from going really off the rails like GMW and AM did thanks to the bad decisions of Michael Jacobs and Terri Minsky. 

Until next week wildcats. 

[lancermylove]

Chapter 4 (SFW)

➣ Pairing: Demon brothers, Royals, Solomon with fem!Reader. ➣ Warning: None ➣ Word Count: 2,784 ➣ Chapters [SFW]: [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12] ➣ Chapters [N.SFW]: [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12]

➣ A/N: I was very tired - so tired that I almost accidentally deleted the entire draft - when I wrote this, so hopefully, it turned out well. 😅

———————————————

The faintest morning light filtered through the window blinds, but you lay awake in bed. Unable to fall asleep again, you got ready and quietly went downstairs, trying to keep the wooden floorboards creaking to a minimum, to find the living area empty. Someone had turned the fireplace off, but the early winter chill on the first level was rather refreshing. 'Hm? Is that...?' Through one of the windows, you noticed Satan pacing back and forth a short distance from the cabin.

The sky above the cabin was painted a brilliant orange as the sun slowly rose from behind the snowy mountains, casting long shadows as it ascended the sky. Satan's hair was illuminated by the sun's rays, giving it the appearance of a crown on his head. His skin was red, and his face was contorted with anger, as though he could not escape the freezing temperatures' bitter chill.

"Good morning, Satan. What's wrong?" You worriedly asked, but when he didn't reply, you continued. "You shouldn't stay out too long."

"Demons are far more powerful than frail humans," he rasped, his tone harsher than he meant, making you wince. It was unusual for him to behave that way with you, so something unexpected must have happened.

The fourth brother sighed after realizing he had taken his anger for his brother out on you. "My apologies, (y/n). After you and Beel left yesterday, Lucifer forced me to shift into his bedroom. It's bad enough that I have to live under the same roof as him, but now, I have to share a room."

"It's okay, Satan. Why did Lucifer force you to move?" You asked curiously but knew the first brother's actions always had a meaning behind them.

"Diavolo had no issues staying with Lucifer, but Barbatos said it would be better for him to stay with his royal highness," Satan fumed. "So, Lucifer asked me to vacate my room. I asked the others if they would switch with me, and Solomon only agreed. But, of course, Lucifer intervened."

The Avatar of Wrath faced you, folded his arms across his chest, and mimicked his older brother's voice. "I refuse to share a room with Solomon. His mere presence gives me a headache."

His impersonation made you chuckle, but there had to be a viable solution to his situation. "Do you want to take my room? I don't mind sharing a room with Lucifer."

"Absolutely not!" He exclaimed, eliciting a laugh from you. You expected that reaction from him but thought to ask anyway. Who were you kidding? You just wanted to see Satan's reaction to you rooming with the Avatar of Pride.

"Then, why don't you find a common ground with Lucifer? That way, you can enjoy spending time with him." You suggested in hopes that he would give in to your request. Once your words settled in his mind, Satan's face lit up. The dark aura of despair hovering around him gave way to one filled with excitement, and his arms tightly coiled around your frame.

"That's it! (Y/n), you are a genius."

"Thank you?" You mumbled, baffled by his sudden enthusiasm. "But what do you plan to do?"

"Since Lucifer can't get away from me, this is the perfect opportunity to prank him. Endlessly." He grinned and released you from his grip. Without waiting for your response, Satan powerwalked to the main door of the cabin, leaving you screaming in the background. "W-Wait! Satan, that's not what I meant."

You sighed heavily and slumped your shoulders, mumbling to yourself. "That was not what I meant, Satan. Sorry, Lucifer. I think I just made your problem worse. I will be in deep waters if Lucifer learns about this conversation."

"Good morning, (y/n). Would you kindly repeat what you said?" Barbatos whispered behind you. His sudden appearance startled you and left you wondering how he managed to stealthily approach you without emitting even a single crunch of the snow underfoot. The small curls on the corners of his lips seemed to indicate that he had knowledge of the occurrences before his appearance.

"Satan doesn't want to stay with Lucifer, and I tried to tell him to find common ground so he could enjoy his time with his older brother. But Satan interpreted that as 'prank Lucifer endlessly'," you exhaled loudly through your mouth. "If Lucifer finds out about this, I will be in trouble."

Unbeknownst to the two of you, Solomon stood near a window inside the cabin, sipping tea from a mug, and expressionlessly peered at you. Barbatos chuckled at your unfounded concern but remained silent. His dark emerald eyes analyzed every aspect of your demeanor, although his expression betrayed nothing of his thoughts or feelings. He seemed to be gauging your discomfort around him, which further heightened your unease.

"What reason could you possibly have for your discomfort?"

His direct inquiry caught you off guard, but you saw no point in concealing the truth from him as you knew he would see through your lies. You mumbled your response, your gaze fixed on your white boots layered with fresh snow, "Lucifer might have caught on. I am worried, Barbatos."

"Do not worry needlessly, (y/n)," he reassured. "Now, my dear, I implore you to return to the cabin. The weather is frigid, and I would rather you not fall ill."

"You can go ahead, and I will join you in a few minutes. I need some fresh air to clear my thoughts." You dully said.

"As you wish, but do not take longer than necessary. Then, I shall take my leave," Barbatos warmly smiled, and to your surprise, his smile reached his eyes. Was this the first time you saw his genuine smile? You couldn't remember but felt happy nevertheless.

After a while, you took his advice and headed back, only to see Mammon sneakily approaching the main door with an object hidden in his hand behind his back. Although you attempted to discern the words on the folded stack of black and blue packets, Mammon thwarted your efforts and slid them inside his jacket's pocket.

"Mammon, what are you doing?" You asked, suspecting he was up to no good. As you expected, he was startled by your presence but managed to give you a nervous smile. He was definitely up to no good, but you hoped his ill intention would not result in Lucifer severely punishing him.

"I ain't doin' anythin', and before ya ask, I'm sneakin' in 'cause I'm tryin' to avoid...Solomon," he laughed. "Are ya hungry? 'Cause I'm starvin'. Let's get breakfast!"

With those words, Mammon ran into the cabin, avoiding any other question you might have had for him. You shook your head, but before you could enter, Solomon blocked your path. "Are you alright, (y/n)? You seemed troubled."

It was evident that the sorcerer suspected you were hiding a secret and sought to hear it directly from you. Given the potential ramifications of divulging the truth, specifically with respect to Lucifer, you promptly shook your head. "It's nothing. I've to get ready to go shopping with Levi, so excuse me."

As his eyes followed you, Solomon smiled to himself. What were you hiding from him, and why were you nervous around Barbatos? But the most crucial question was: should he pry into the matter or leave it alone?

"Don't be nervous, Levi. There aren't many people around this time of the day," you chuckled and squeezed his hand slightly. Levi said nothing as he scanned the colorful store you had brought him to.

Every rack and shelf had an array of Christmas clothes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. The walls were adorned with tinsel, mistletoes, snowflake cutouts, and wreaths, creating a festive atmosphere that filled you with a sense of joy and excitement. However, the endless wave of bright colors made your eyes water. In the front right corner of the store stood a teenager with her caramel eyes glued on her phone, utterly oblivious to her surroundings. The loud music blasting from her earphones made it clear that she was lost in her own world. Not paying heed to her lack of awareness, you made your way to the center of the store.

"Hey, Levi, is this festive enough?" You asked while holding a hanger up to your shoulders. The sweater on the hanger had a multitude of colors and clashing patterns, with green reindeer and snowflakes scattered throughout.

"It looks like you purchased an entire Christmas store and glued it to the sweater. Then, found a unicorn and asked it to hurl sparkles on it. But that still wasn't enough for you, so you wrapped the sweater in green and red tinsel garland," Levi laughed.

"Descriptive," you giggled. "So, what do you think about buying ugly sweaters for everyone?"

"No way that Lucifer, Satan, Asmo, and Barbatos would wear them," Levi responded as he looked through the rack of sweaters closest to him until one caught his attention. The green sweater had an upside-down realistic pizza slice with green tinsel garland wrapped around it and a star on top. "Beel would like this and probably try to eat it."

"Oh, that's perfect of him! Then, why don't we change the theme from ugly sweaters to witty or relatable sweaters?" You smiled, proud of your quick thinking, to which he readily agreed.

The first red and green sweater you found was ideal for Asmo. The main body of the wear was a creative nod to the holiday season, playing with the idea of being on the nice or naughty list. The words "On the Nice List" were printed in large white letters, but 'Nice' was spelled in white sequins with a black background. But with one sweep of your hand, the sequins flipped to the word 'Naughty', reminding you of Asmo's playful nature.

When you showed Levi your choice, he could not stop fiddling with the sequins, fascinated by their ability to change with one touch. As he giddily flipped back and forth between nice and naughty, you found a mustard yellow sweater fitted for Belphagor. In the center was a sloth clad in a vibrant red sweater with a matching Santa hat as it dozed off on a snow-covered branch adorned with Christmas lights. The sloth's arms were intertwined in a position of contentment as the words Merry Slothmas hovered above and below in vermillion. The remainder of the empty place was adorned with deep blue Christmas trees and snowflakes and green ornaments with red swirls.

"(Y/n) look at this. Doesn't he remind you of Lucifer?" Levi laughed, holding a crimson sweater up for you. This dark red sweatshirt was accented with a black rectangular shape, which extended to the sleeves. Within the rectangular shape was a backdrop of vibrant Christmas string lights, adding a pop of color to the mostly dark outfit. In the center, the words "Is this jolly enough?" were written in the shape of a Christmas tree. With his grumpy expression, the Grinch stood beside it with a cup of coffee in his hand, wrapped in string lights, and a red Santa hat on his head.

"Lucifer as the Grinch," you whispered while imagining Lucifer as the grouch in your favorite part of the classic movie. Somehow, the Grinch's expression reminded you of the stern first brother, making you laugh. "It's perfect! I bet this is what he will look like on Christmas morning."

Your next targets were the prince and his butler. You selected a fiery crimson sweatshirt for Diavolo with white pine trees, snowflakes, and candy canes printed on it. In front of the festive designs was a vibrant green frustrated T-Rex with a Santa cap, gazing at gifts that lay beyond his stubby reach. His tiny arms tried to grasp the presents, while "T-Rex Hates Christmas" was painted upon the sweatshirt in striking white. Luckily, a sweatshirt ideal for Barbatos hung beside Diavolo's - even their sweatshirts came in a pair. Compared to the prince's, the butler's wear was far simpler - a ketchup-colored sweatshirt with random festive patterns and words in white that read "I Can Get You On The Naughty List."

As you turned around to place the sweatshirts on your 'selected' pile, you spotted Levi sitting on a nearby chair. "Levi, are you alright?" You questioned while walking closer to him.

Platonic:

"Just a little tired. I stayed up half of the night playing the game you recommended," he mumbled before giving you a hopeful look. "But if you hug me, my HP will recharge."

With a soft giggle, you opened your arms, bent down, and pulled him in a warm hug. While you rubbed his back, he nuzzled into your shoulder and exhaled with relief.

Romantic:

"Just a little tired. I stayed up half of the night playing the game you recommended," he mumbled and hesitantly wrapped his arms around your hips before burying his face in your abdomen. As he nuzzled your midsection, you coiled one arm around his shoulders and stroked his hair with the other. His hidden face held a faint but timid smile.

-----

After a little break, you and Levi returned to hunting for the rest of the sweaters. In his peripheral vision, he spotted a cat and instantly selected the apparel for Satan. The dark green sweater was decorated with white stripes and a mix of red and green snowflakes across the sleeves. In the center was an image of a perpetually grumpy cat sitting in front of a red ornament, wearing a Santa hat. The words "Jingle All The Way To Hell" were inscribed in white above and below the image.

You walked behind Levi and chuckled at the grumpy cat, recalling how Satan looked while fuming earlier in the day. Ignoring Leviathan's quizzical look, as you didn't want to upset Satan but telling Levi his issues, you searched for the perfect sweaters for Mammon and Solomon. Even though the two of you had been in the store for a while, the teen cashier had yet to notice your presence.

The black sweatshirt you selected for Mammon had a rectangle bordered by a frame of vibrant red presents and green snowflakes. Within the frame were three green checkboxes, each with a distinct white typography. The first checkbox read "Nice," the second "Naughty," and the third "Innocent until proven guilty." A red checkmark was placed neatly inside the third checkbox. Contrasting Mammon's sweatshirt was Solomon's bright red sweater that had the words "Permanently On The Naughty List And Loving Every Minute Of It" in bold white letters.

With a sigh of relief, you sat the last sweater on your selected pile and scanned the store to find Levi. Who knew finding the perfect Christmas sweater could be this exhausting? He stood in the game-related Christmas sweaters section in hopes of finding one for him and you. But you beat him to it and handed him a dark blue sweater with colorful crewmates chaotically standing in the center and "Christmas is Among Us" written below them. "How about this one?"

"Then, will you wear this one?" Levi shyly asked as he showed you a pine green sweater with Pikachu happily sitting in the center, a heart above its head, and the words "All I Want For Christmas Is...CHUUU!!!" below and above the adorable Pokemon.

Platonic Route:

Your gaze softened at his choice, and without a second thought, you threw your arms around him. His heart fluttered at feeling the warmth of your body against his.

"Aww, you're too sweet, Levi! Well, that's all the sweaters. We are officially done!" You exclaimed, releasing him from your embrace. "How about we check out, head home, and collapse on the couch?"

The third brother couldn't have been happier with your suggestion, as his body desperately needed rest.

Romantic Route:

Your face grew warm as a light, rosy flush graced your cheeks. Without hesitation, you playfully pressed your soft lips against his but quickly pulled away. However, the Avatar of Envy was not satisfied with a peck, so he leaned closer to you and gently placed a hand on the back of your head. Levi drew you closer in a heartbeat for a deep and passionate kiss. But your amorous moment was not destined to reach its destination uninterrupted as you heard giggling in the background.

The teen cashier had finally realized there were people present in the store, but much to your dismay, it was at a time when you wanted privacy. Levi broke the kiss and turned away in embarrassment while you gave her a shy grin.

"The two of you make a cute couple," she playfully remarked.

———————————————

➣  Please visit my website for the full masterlist!

[99liv3s]

A New Shiny Breeding Method

“Breathe, Anna, you’re doing great!!”

29 year old Anna Jones panted and moaned as the next contraction hit her.  The egg, which was slightly larger than a baby’s head, began to crown at her vagina, causing a great amount of pain and pressure!  The nursery worker acting as her midwife brushed Anna’s light blonde hair out of her face, then, after gently placing her hand on Anna’s belly, she knelt down between her legs, ready to catch the egg once Anna delivered!

“IT HURTS!” “OH GOD, IT HURTS!!” Anna exclaimed!

“Yes, I know it does,” the nursery worker stated, “but you are doing great, and remember, it’s all worth it!”

Anna wasn’t sure she agreed with the nursery worker’s statement, for she had been effectively forced into this new procedure!  Of course, shiny hunting had always been a common practice among Pokemon trainers, and the method with the best chances had always been Pokemon breeding… Trainers would hatch up to thousands of eggs hoping to get Pokemon with high battle stats, or, with luck, a shiny.  Once it was discovered long ago that dittos could breed with anything, it became the custom to breed the desired Pokemon with ditto to guarantee egg types.

Unfortunately, as everyone knew, certain Pokemon couldn’t breed… it was initially explained that these certain Pokemon, usually legendary Pokemon, had no gender.  However, it was likely more complicated than that.  Scientists across all the regions of the Pokemon world had been studying this very issue, and the research had made its way to the Galar region, after a new discovery had been made.

Across the region, a small handful of humans had been born with a rare mutation that allowed their DNA to shift and be able to combine with any other DNA, including that of a Pokemon’s.  It was called a “gift” by the highest renowned professors, and it had the potential to open new possibilities. The Galar region had two Pokemon nurseries, but suddenly, one day, the nursery nestled in the wild area closed its doors.  Unbeknownst to most of the outside world, the nursery had been converted into a new laboratory, dedicated to studying this new discovery, and a new method that was made possible because of it.  Recent attempts in Pokemon cloning had been disastrous, and scientists had been proceeding very cautiously in future studies in that field, but several brilliant minds cooked up the idea that if a Pokemon’s DNA could be injected into a host with the rare condition, which they were now calling the “Ditto Genome”, combined with a cocktail of several other drugs, the result could produce Pokemon eggs in a similar manner as true reproduction, and this would bypass the obstacle surrounding legendary Pokemon.

The scientists were eager to put their theories to the test, but they needed a viable candidate.  Unfortunately, most of the humans that possessed the “Ditto Genome” were trainers, itching to complete their Gym Challenges, or other dreams, and were not available... The scientists continued their search, and then an opportunity came to them in the form of Anna Jones!

Anna had attempted the Gym Challenge but failed at the second gym.  Because of this, she became so distraught; she quit as a Pokemon Trainer and released all of her Pokemon.  This soon proved to be a mistake, as she had no other viable skills, and could not find employment anywhere.  During a typical medical checkup, she had had a DNA test run, and it was discovered that she carried the “Ditto Genome.”  Just when it looked as if she was about to reach the end of her road, she was approached, (more like abducted), by the scientists.  They brought her to the nursery laboratory, where they made a proposition: They had informed a very strong trainer in secret that they could provide him the means to potentially hatch a shiny Mew, and the trainer had jumped at the chance, paying the nursery a considerable amount of money to make it happen!

So, two days had passed to find Anna spread out on a hospital bed inside the nursery wearing nothing but a pink bra, laboring to deliver a clutch of eggs that had apparently formed after a scientist injected some sort of concoction into her via a needle to the stomach.  There were still parts of the situation even she was not aware of yet!

The egg slowly began to emerge from Anna’s vagina, and as it did so, she let out a cry of grief!  In the back of her mind, she was aware that her stomach looked like a 9 month pregnant woman, so if she was giving birth to Pokemon eggs, then there had to be more than one, much more!

“Get it out! Get it out!” GET IT OUT!!” Anna begged!

“It’s coming,” the nursery worker assured her. “Push with the contraction!”

Anna pushed and screamed, and the egg slid to its widest point. Then, with a slight squishy pop, it slid out, and Anna slumped onto her pillow in relief.  However, it was not to last!

A second, male, nursery worker that had been doing nothing but standing in the room apparently watching the entire effort, advanced forward and took the egg gently from Anna’s “midwife.”  He then turned to another female worker standing just outside the door and gave the egg to her, saying “Give this egg to the trainer… tell him nothing about how we obtained it!”

“He emptied his entire party, save one Pokemon, for this, sir,” She responded, taking the egg, “He will demand more eggs immediately so he can hatch them as quickly as possible.

As if in response to this, Anna let out another moan, feeling more pain and pressure building up as a second egg began making its way down her birth canal.

“Inform him that we’ll have another for him soon,” the head scientist proclaimed.  “Here comes the second of eight.”

“EIGHT??!!!” Anna squeaked.  “AAAGGGGHHHH!!!!”

The pain and pressure build up and the egg seemed to force its way to Anna’s opening, not caring how much it hurt her.  Anna tried to push in tandem with it, but it was happening so fast, she could barely catch her breath.  Sure enough, it began to crown, and Anna was hit with a burning sensation so awful, she was sure a Charmander had used flamethrower on her lower body.

“OW OW OW OW… AH AH AH AH AH!!”

“Breathe, honey, it’s making great progress!” The nursery worker coached.

Anna panted and moaned and cried, and after a minute of agonizing pushing, the second egg slid out of her.  Immediately, before Anna could barely glimpse what had just come out of her, the “midwife” handed the egg to the head scientist, who in turn, passed it out the door to the trainer.  Anna felt a twinge of anger, that she was going through the pain of bringing these eggs into the world, only for them to belong to a Pokemon trainer she had never met, all because she failed… all because she had this damn “Ditto Genome!”

“Good news,” the scientist said to the room in general, “The trainer just told our worker outside that he hatched a healthy Mew out of that first egg!”  “So far the experiment is a success, but we must continue for that shiny!”

“Easy for you to say,” Anna thought bitterly, as she could feel a slight build up of pressure once again.  After 15 minutes of more pain, panting, screaming, crying, and pushing, the third egg was delivered.  As soon as the scientist gave the egg to the trainer, Anna began to feel discomfort as the fourth egg struggled to make its appearance.  It felt strange, for it seemed to be the same size as the others she delivered, but it seemed she could feel the little Mew move inside of it, as it made its way through her cervix.  “Please, let this be the shiny,” Anna hoped to herself, “Please let me and this trainer get lucky, so I can end this experiment!”

The fourth egg emerged, somewhat easier than the others, so Anna was grateful for small favors, but after a few minutes, in which she had time to catch her breath, the scientist informed everyone in the room that all of the eggs produced had been hatched, and there was no shiny in any of them.

“Faster,” the scientist exclaimed, “The trainer wants to continue hatching eggs!”

“The little shit can wait,” Anna breathed, as she felt the twinge of the fifth egg begin to start its emergence.  She pushed and pushed and brought fourth the fifth egg, wondering how that trainer was hatching them so damn fast, but she had very little time to dwell on it, for the contractions to bring the sixth egg were already starting up, and Anna could already feel her body tiring out from the effort of pushing out what was essentially five baby heads.

As a result of this, the sixth egg’s delivery was not so easy!

“I can’t do this anymore,” Anna cried. “It hurts too bad, and I’m exhausted!”

“You have to,” the scientist said immediately. “Remember, we were paid a lot of money for this.”  “You will never have to worry about being poor every again, Miss Jones… This will allow you to start a new life!”

Anna knew that what he was saying was true, and she couldn’t go back to having nothing, so she mustered up her courage and strength and pushed out the sixth egg with one big push!  Unfortunately, the strain to do so seemed to “awaken” the seventh egg and it began its decent.  However, Anna found the strength to birth it as well, grunting and roaring in pain in the process.  She was comforted by the fact that the next egg was number eight, and was the last of the group!

“PUSH,” the nursery worker ordered! “PUSH HARD!!”

Anna screamed and pushed, working tirelessly to birth the final egg, and after 10 minutes, the ordeal was over.  Anna slumped onto the bed in exhaustion and relief, listening to the sounds around her, but what she heard filled her with a new sense of dread.

“No shiny,” the scientist exclaimed in disgust. “The trainer is irritated.”  “Continue!”

“Wait, what does…” Anna began, but then her heart dropped as the nursery worker advanced on her with another needle and injected it in her lower belly, muttering “I’m sorry!”  Within minutes, Anna’s stomach began expanding again, and she could feel her uterus fill up with eggs, once again.  If it was anything like the first time, labor would hit quite soon, and she was unsure she could handle it again.

“NO,” Anna pleaded.  “No, I CAN’T!”  “I just had eight eggs… I’m too tired for more!”

“It can’t be helped,” the scientist responded, almost apologetically.  “The trainer is still outside, cycling around in circles and chatting to friends on his phone.” “He wants the eggs now, otherwise he’ll start to ask questions about all this.”

Before Anna could protest, the nursery worker that had been acting as her midwife began scanning her with a small portable device.

“Four eggs this time,” she said. “Only four!” “You can do it, dear!”

“But, I CA…AAAHHHH”, Anna started, as contractions started up again!

As 20 more minutes passed, Anna labored and birthed the first of a new batch of Mew eggs.  It was just as painful and exhausting as the first births has been.  With barely time to contemplate what would happen if it took over a thousand hatches to get this godforsaken shiny, she was hit with another wave of pain.  Egg number two was making its appearance.

Anna breathed and pushed for the next several minutes, before she and everyone else realized something was wrong.  The nursery worker checked her, and then looked into Anna’s eyes with an expression of what seemed like pity.

“The egg is turned,” she said to her. “It’s coming out wide instead of long.”

“What does that mean?” Anna asked in terror.

“By all accounts, it means the egg is breach,” the midwife responded.  “It’s coming out sideways.”

“NO!!” Anna yelled, knowing what that must mean.  “Can’t you turn it or something??”

“I can try,” the midwife answered.

She reached into Anna’s vagina, causing Anna to scream!  It was extremely uncomfortable, and that discomfort turned to pure agony when the worker attempted to turn the egg inside her.  After a minute of this, she withdrew from Anna, shaking her head.

“I’m sorry, Anna, I can’t move it,” She said, but Anna didn’t pay any attention to this… Whatever the midwife had tried to do seemed to accelerate the process, and Anna was bearing down, the pain that hit her when the worker reached inside her still present.

“OH MY GOD!!” “IT REALLY HURTS!!” Anna bellowed!! “I CAN’T DO THIS!”

“You can,” the midwife soothed her.  “You’re strong.” “It’s going to hurt a lot, but you can do it.”

“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”

Anna felt the egg begin to emerge, and knew that in its current position, it would not fit through her vagina.  She pushed, and moaned, and screamed, and cried, but it was no use… the wide section of the egg crowned, and stayed there, not moving at all.  It peaked out of Anna as if taunting her and the nursery workers to get it out.

“AHHH….OOHH….UUGGHH….AGGGHHHH!”

In an attempt to assist the laboring mother, the nursery worker positioned herself and used both her hands to press on Anna’s contracting belly.  To her amazement, the combined pushing of her, Anna, and the contractions seemed to be working… the egg slowly emerged as Anna howled in agony.

“Just a little more…. Just a little more!!” “It’s coming out, Anna!!”

“AAAHHHHHH”  “PULL IT OUT RIGHT NOW!!!”

“I can’t, Anna, but you’ve almost got it… don’t give up!!”

With a final almighty scream, Anna pushed the egg out and the nursery worker caught it.  “Good job, Anna!” she cheered.

After 10 minutes, contractions for the third egg started.  Anna was sure that this surely could not be as difficult as the egg she just delivered.  “Is this one turned right?” She asked her midwife.

After a few seconds, the midwife stopped checking Anna, with a grim expression on her face.  “Yes, it is, but…”

“But, what,” Anna asked, dreading the answer.

“This egg is twice as large as the others,” the nursery worker exclaimed.

Anna shook her head stubbornly, refusing to believe it could get any worse.  “NO, It can’t be,” Anna pleaded.  “It won’t fit!”

“I’m sorry,” the midwife said to her.  “I know it will hurt a lot, but you have to push hard and get it out!!”  “There’s no going back now!!”

Anna screamed in pain as the egg moved.  It was pure agony, and Anna was sure that trying to push this egg out would tear her… maybe even kill her.  After about ten minutes of horrible pain and pressure, the egg finally began poking out of her vagina.  Anna howled in anguish as it crowned, causing the familiar burning sensation, only twice as bad.

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” Anna bellowed.  “AAHH!!”  “GET THIS THING OUT OF ME!!”  “PLEASE!!!”

“It’s coming,” the nursery worker said to her.  “It’s not stuck, just moving slowly, cause it’s big, and your vagina is not.”  “Push hard!!”

Anna screamed as she pushed, the egg slowly emerging.  Distantly, she heard the head scientist saying something impatiently, but she didn’t care.  The pain was too much, and it was taking all of her willpower not to pass out.  The egg moved inch by inch, and the burning was so severe, Anna was sure that her vagina had opened to the point where it would never be right again!

“IT’S TEARING ME!!” She screamed.  “I CAN’T PUSH ANYMORE!!”  “CUT IT OUT OF ME!!”

“No,” the midwife said sternly.  “You can do this!!”  “PUSH!!”

Anna wailed and pushed and cried.  After a few minutes, she slumped backward onto the bed, trying to catch her breath.  The egg was halfway out, hanging between her legs like a crowning head.  She was given oxygen, and the egg was examined while she attempted to quickly rest between contractions.  The midwife and supporting scientists made an interesting discovery when they scanned this egg hanging halfway out of Anna.

“There are two Mews in that egg… Twins!” one of the scientists stated.

“This is most unusual, as we’ve never seen two Pokemon in one egg before, ever!” The head scientist said.  “How is this possible?”  “This warrants further study!”

“I JUST WANT IT OUT!!!” Anna bawled as another heavy contraction came over her.  She grunted and pushed, and finally, the large egg slid out and landed in the midwife’s arms.  However, instead of giving it to the scientist by the door, she handed the overlarge egg to someone else, who took it to another corner of the room.

“Wait, what are you doing??” Anna exclaimed breathlessly, as she watched them take the egg she struggled to deliver over to a lab table.

“We’re not giving this egg to the trainer,” The head scientist exclaimed.  “We have just witnessed a phenomenon, and we will need to study it and the Mews inside!”

“But…. but what if one of those Mews in that egg is a shiny?” Anna asked frantically.

The head scientist shrugged.  “If it is, then too bad… we’ll just have to continue for a second shiny, one from a normal egg!”

“NO!!” Anna yelled, in both anger and pain as she felt another contraction hit.  “You’re not the one struggling to birth these eggs!”  “What if another hundred eggs doesn’t produce one?”

“Then, you’ll be giving birth to more than one hundred eggs,” The scientist exclaimed.  “Don’t worry, you’ll get to rest eventually between births, and you will, of course, be well compensated for it!”

Anna’s heart fell… she didn’t think any amount of money in the world was worth this torture.  She was so distraught and exhausted that, though the next egg seemed normal enough, Anna was struggling to deliver it.

“Push, Anna, Push!!” The midwife coached, but Anna only gave a small mediocre push.  Her heart was no longer in it, and she had lost her will and focus.  She moaned and yelled in pain, convinced that this last egg would no doubt kill her. This continued for the next half hour: Anna moaning, the midwife directing her to push, and Anna losing her energy, when the large egg Anna had delivered earlier hatched on the lab table, revealing two Mews, though none of them were shiny.  This did nothing to help Anna’s confidence, and the scientist that had taken the large egg was scanning the two newborn Mews, seemingly unconcerned with Anna’s agony.

“This is it,” Anna thought to herself.  “I’m going to die, painfully!”  “I can’t get this last egg out, I’m too tired and it hurts too bad!”  Suddenly, Anna heard another voice in her mind.  “You are strong,” it said.  “You must not give up!”  “I can give you the willpower to help you get through this!”  Anna blinked.  “Who are you,” she asked in her mind, and then the voice answered her, “I am one of the Mews you just delivered!!”

Anna glanced over at the lab table with wide eyes, to see one of the newborn Mews staring at her, its eyes glowing blue.  It was communicating psychically with her, and seeming to do more than that.  She began feeling renewed strength, as if the Mew was somehow energizing her with its power.

Anna bore down and pushed hard!  “UUUUGGGGHHHHHH!!!”

“Good girl, that’s it!” the midwife said, as the egg began to crown finally.

Anna screamed and grunted, pushing again.  The egg was emerging quickly, and the midwife scientist watched with wide eyes.

“There’s a fifth egg right behind this one,” she told the room.  “It’s trying to come out too!!”  “Anna, give me one good hard push!!”

Anna screamed loudly and pushed harder than she had ever done, or thought possible, and the fourth and fifth egg both popped out of her, one after another into the midwife’s arms.

Anna lay on the bed, panting in relief as the head scientist handed the fourth egg out to the trainer.  The midwife was mopping her head with a cold, damp cloth.  After 10 minutes, everyone heard a loud cheer from outside.

“That fourth egg hatched into a shiny Mew!” The head scientist told the room a minute later.  “The experiment was a success!!”

The entire room cheered, except for Anna, who was too tired to join in the celebrations, but smiled in relief nonetheless.  She did wonder what was going to happen to her now… what if more trainers wanted shiny Pokemon, or the scientists wanted to experiment with more legendaries??

Anna was allowed a day of rest.  That evening, the head scientist came into her room to talk to her.

“We have good news for you,” he said.  “You can go home!”  “We will be paying you quite a large sum shortly.”  “We discovered something yesterday… one of those Mews from that large egg can breed!!”  “It can also talk psychically to us, and has volunteered to take your place in our experiments.”

Anna sighed in relief.  “So, it’s all over??”

“Yes, it is!” the scientist responded.  “We have your clothes washed for you, so as soon as you are recovered and dressed, we will present you with your payment and you can leave!”  “We thank you deeply for what you did for us.”

“NEVER AGAIN!!” Anna said sharply!!

The scientist smiled.  “Of course!!”  “You have enough money now to live comfortably for the rest of your life!”  “We only ask that you never tell anyone what happened here, and we have a final gift for you!”

The scientist left the room for a few seconds and returned, holding a Pokemon egg that he presented to Anna.

“This is the fifth Mew egg you birthed, the one that was a surprise,” he told her.  “That trainer released all of the non-shiny Mews into the wild, effectively restoring the Mew population, and we have those twin Mews for our studies, so once this final egg hatches, the Mew inside it is yours.”  “It did come out of you, after all.”

Anna took the egg wide eyed and stared at it.  A tear ran down her cheek as she smiled.  Perhaps it was all worth it after all!!

   End

[frozenartscapes]

I think Verdant Wind being added as Silver Snow copy paste dragged down the development. If VW wasn't added, then SS, CF, and AM could have all been more fleshed out (so Edelgard could have been shown killing Thales personally and Dimitri's arc would be gradual instead of him going from batshit crazy to "good boy" instantly). So I think either VW should have not been made or SS was scrapped and Claude could actually get a story about him.

So here's what I'm thinking for Verdant Wind, because honestly if it were up to me it would be a total overhaul, and if put into the context of the game's development might have had to be a DLC or something if they were as pressed for time as it seems.

You pick Claude and the Golden Deer and the first half of the game follows many of the same story beats. (Though one thing I would like to see in White Clouds is more opportunities to interact with the other Houses outside of free time, like maybe a couple missions where two houses are sent to the same place to back each other up. This would then allow for supports to form between characters who might not necessarily be in the same house).

Shit goes down, Edelgard is revealed to be the Flame Emperor, war is declared, Byleth falls into a ravine for 5 years.

You come back and things are in a similar place as they start off in VW. You meet Claude at the monastery, he fills you in on what's been going on, and you decide that action needs to taken. However, that action is not "let's go to war too" but instead more of a diplomatic move. You decide to meet with Edelgard in a parlay at Grondor and she initially accepts, but when you both arrive you discover Dimitri has come with an army of his own. Not believing this isn't some sort of ambush on Claude's part, Edelgard calls the parlay off and initiates the battle of Grondor. However, this time you and Claude decide to stop Dimitri and successfully manage to intervene in the Kingdom's attack. Edelgard and her forces still retreat back to Enbarr but Dimitri is able to be captured and (eventually) reasoned with. (In this version Dimitri hasn't fully lost it like he does in AM. He still has some old friends and supports so he doesn't end up completely feral. He's still deeply distrusting of Edelgard but he at least agrees to help Claude find out a motive before killing her).

The attack on Fort Merceus is basically the same. You succeed in seizing it only for the whole thing to be blown up by the Javelins. Everyone manages to escape, though, including notable people from Edelgard's army. They are just as confused and horrified about the strike as you and your team.

Edelgard isn't up for talking this time around so you are forced to lay siege to Enbarr. This also plays out very similarly to VW, but the end cutscene is different. First, Claude is there. Then, rather than killing Edelgard, you extend a hand out to her, instead. She's hesitant, but Claude manages to convince her that there are no schemes this time. They just want to talk. He mentions the Javelins and how even her own army didn't seem to know what they were. When she blanches at the mention, he realizes that these "allies" of hers aren't exactly the most trustworthy of people.

Edelgard then reluctantly tells you, Claude, and Dimitri about Thales and TWSITD. She's hesitant because this is all sensitive information but she doesn't have much to lose at this point, what with Claude's army basically occupying Enbarr. She reveals what happened to her and her family, why she has two Crests, and why she's been forced to work with Thales. It's Dimitri who approaches first once she's finished, moving quickly and reaching out a hand before anyone can react. Edelgard flinches but instead of going for her neck, his hand comes to rest gently on her shoulder. "Where is that monster?" Dimitri hisses, "So I can tear his head from his body."

Once the three leaders form a tentative alliance, Edelgard reveals where Rhea has been hidden. She tells them all that she tried to keep her from too much harm, but she didn't have much control over the situation. Rhea is released and initially weak from imprisonment. She is also briefed on what happened to Edelgard, and why she started the war in the first place.

With a new target in mind, the alliance of nations storm Shambhala. Rhea has been healed up enough to aid in this battle. You defeat Thales, and he responds by launching all the Javelins he can. Rhea goes on to intercept them as she does in the game, but this time things go differently. Hubert points out that as long as Thales has a hand on the rune activating the Javelins, they'll keep coming. So Edelgard charges him along with Dimitri. The two cut through any mage who tries to stop them, and ultimately Edelgard sees vengeance for herself and her family by killing Thales herself. This halts the Javelins before they become too overwhelming for Rhea, and she returns, a little hurt but ok.

Everyone returns to Garreg Mach for celebrations, and also political discussions because there are a lot of things that now need to be covered. Rhea reveals everything about the Nabateans, Crests, and the Relics. Once she learns the true history of Fodlan, Edelgard makes her case for her own goals. She still believes that society should move away from putting so much importance on Crests, especially now that she knows where they truly came from. But she admits that uniting the land under one banner and disbanding the Church entirely would be taking things too far. Dimitri agrees with Edelgard, despite some protests from Faerghus officials. But he decides that the Hero's Relics have served their purpose and it is time they let the souls of the dead rest. Claude is insistent on Fodlan opening up to other nations, to which the other leaders agree, too. Rhea also decides that it is time she steps away from being Archbishop, but she does not appoint Byleth to the role.

A messenger then interrupts with news that a strange and powerful army is currently sweeping across Fodlan. They connect the dots and realize that it is Nemesis. They all decide to confront him as a group, showing off the might of a Fodlan united under peace. Rhea, fearful of mass casualties, tells Byleth what she did when they were a baby, explaining why they have the Crest of Flames and can wield the Sword of the Creator. There isn't a lot of time to unpack all of that because Nemesis is basically at their door, but Byleth still thanks Rhea for telling them.

They confront Nemesis all as one united front and defeat him. There are many parallels in cutscenes that call back the first cutscene of the game. The difference this time is that Rhea isn't facing Nemesis alone. In the last cutscene after defeating him in gameplay, Claude's arrow fake-out kicks things off, but it also includes Edelgard, Dimitri, and Rhea charging him alongside Byleth. In the end, Nemesis is run-through by the Sword of the Creator, the Sword of Seiros, Aymr, Areadbhar, and a bolt from Failnaught. He goes down, his army dissolves into dust, and victory is finally secured.

After that it's revealed what happens in Fodlan: each nation stays as their own land. Dimitri takes his place as the King of Faerghus and works on moving the kingdom away from knighthood and militaristic practices. He devotes more time and money to revitalizing the land and towns, building better roads between cities, and expanding education and other important services. Edelgard also works on fixing and providing social services like education and healthcare to the Adrestian people. She forms a strong alliance with the other nations, utilizing the fact that Adrestia has so much viable farmland to ensure no one goes hungry. She also grants Brigid its freedom, and works closely with Seteth and Rhea in Church reformations. Claude leaves Fodlan to take his place as King of Almyra, though he promises to visit often. Lorenz takes over the Alliance, and like the other two leaders works diligently to provide a better life for his people. Rhea eventually steps away from her role as Archbishop. She does offer it to Byleth, but you get a choice as to whether or not you want to take it. If you don't Rhea says she understands and that Seteth will take on a temporary position until a human can be found to carry on the legacy. She agrees that an immortal being shouldn't hold that kind of power forever.

There's one final cinematic cutscene in which every character with a Hero's Relic solemnly returns it to the Holy Tomb, with Byleth laying the Sword of the Creator last. They glance up at the Throne with all the characters visible behind them, and they smile.

Now Sothis can finally rest.

---

A couple other fun things that could be included in this route:

Because of the mentioned supports between houses, it is possible to s-support any of the House Leaders, not just Claude in this route

To make things extra fun, every unit could potentially be playable in the final battle

Edelgard and Thales can have special dialogue where she basically tells him to go fuck himself before killing him with the axe he gave her

None of the Black Eagles who stay with Edelgard would actually die in the siege on Enbarr, but would have unique "oh no I've been captured" quotes

The cutscene with Edelgard's surrender could start exactly like it does in SS/VW so if people saw that first, they would at first think she was going to die. This would then make Byleth extending a hand out in peace that much more impactful

Every now and then Dimitri and Edelgard could make a comment about how odd it is to be working with each other, and how they are still surprised neither one of them died after all those years of war, a BIG wink to the camera regarding the other routes where one or both of them don't make it

Claude can bring in Nader and other Almyran reinforcements for the final battle, and as a result could result in unique battle quotes from Rhea and Nader with the two of them commending each other and realizing that tensions need not be so high between their nations

Because different supports can happen between houses, there isn't as much pressure to recruit everyone by the end of White Clouds

There could be different paralogues for characters, along with ones already in the game that might be route specific. Dimitri's paralogue where he takes on Cornelia can be a side event that helps strengthen the Kingdom's army in future battles. Bernadetta/Petra's paralogue would allow for allies from Brigid to join in future battles. Edelgard could get a new paralogue where they have to sweep out the last remnants of various TWS labs and lairs, and it's made clear just how bad it had been for her.

Like, I know this is a lot, and executing it as a playable section of the game would be a lot of work. This is all just hypothetical, of course. This would be what I would recommend for the game, but as I say this just know that I don't expect any of this to actually be made. These are just some ideas for how VW could theoretically be changed.

The game would still need a route for Claude, as he is one of the three main choices at the very start of the game. I don't necessarily think SS should be removed, either, because that choice of "kill or don't kill edelgard" is still an incredibly poignant moment that would be lost if SS was gone. But I do wish VW or SS played out differently or at the very least used different cutscenes. The fact that Edelgard dies the same way twice kind of sucks. (This, on top of Dimitri dying off-screen multiple times and Rhea basically being kneecapped and not useful in 3/4 routes)

But I like Claude's route being a Golden Route. It is the Golden Deer after all.

[hermannsthumb]

Newt picks up a parasite while working on a sample, like we talked about!!

basic summary: think sex pollen but parasite...that removes your inhibitions and makes you all lovey-dovey  👀 👀 👀 this marvelous idea belongs to @k-sci-janitor​ and we talked it over in discord the other night. hope u enjoy!!!

------------------------------------

“You’re in a right foul mood today,” Hermann says one morning, when Newton stomps—grumbling, scowling, and slamming the door behind him hard enough to send Hermann’s pencil cup teetering over the edge of his desk—into the lab. Hermann catches the cup with one hand and rights it. He arches an eyebrow at Newton as Newton ignores him in favor of hurtling himself into his desk chair. Newton’s sudden downward mood shifts are no stranger to Hermann, but they rarely take this sort of form—he’s far more the sort to engage Hermann in pointless arguments or lock himself away in his bunk than throw a tantrum. “What on Earth is the matter?”

“My request to join the Singapore trip got denied,” Newton announces.

Ah. That would do it. Newton was excited about the prospect of overseeing the salvaging of fresh samples for weeks, to the extent that it was all he would talk about to Hermann. Hermann is not typically in the business of extending pity to Newton (and Newton is not typically in the business of wanting pity from Hermann), but he does feel a small twinge of it anyway. “Ah, bad luck,” Hermann says. He wonders if he should offer Newton a conciliatory pat on the shoulder, but then realizes that would require him to get up and move across the laboratory, and decides it’s more trouble than it’s worth. He twists his mouth down sympathetically instead. “Well, perhaps it’s a good thing. Travelling’s just a great big bloody hassle, isn’t it? All the packing, and airports...”

“I love travelling,” Newton says.

“What I mean to say,” Hermann tries again, “is that now you can devote your time to more, er, worthy pursuits. Your work, for example. I imagine there’s plenty to be done here.”

“Dude,” Newton says. “No.”

Hermann appreciates the opportunity to shut up. Newton, still grumbling to himself, pulls on a pair of disposable work gloves and straps on his headlamp. “I’m workin’ with shit that’s three months old, dude,” Newton says.

“Mm,” Hermann says. Finding it highly unlikely he’ll get any proper work done until Newton finishes his oncoming tirade, he picks up that morning’s uncompleted crossword puzzle.

“It’s decaying,” Newton says. “It’s barely viable. You see this bullshit?”

He holds ups a greyish strand of kaiju intestine. Hermann pushes up his glasses and pretends to observe it. “Mm,” he repeats.

“It was barely viable when I got it,” Newton says. “So stupid. Whoever they have in charge of salvaging is a fucking clown. I should be in charge of it everywhere.” He rips a chunk of the intestine in half with a disgusting wet sound that makes Hermann wince. “They should let me go to Singapore. I said I’d pay for my own plane ticket. My work here is too important, apparently. Ha! Then why don’t they give us some funding, huh?”

“Quite right,” Hermann mumbles, and fills in a clue of the puzzle.

“I already bought those little travel-sized shampoo bottles too,” Newton says. “And I—“

He stops, suddenly, mid-sentence. As if the words have been seized from his very throat. Hermann looks up: Newton is standing, still, quiet, mouth half-open. He remains that way for a full minute. It’s no small amount of disconcerting. Is this some strange new act of protest he’s decided upon? Not speaking at all? “Newton?” Hermann finally says, cautiously breaching the silence.

Newton shakes himself, and casts a funny look at Hermann. As if Hermann is the one behaving in an utterly bizarre fashion. “Wha?”

“Are you—?” Hermann sighs. It’s not worth it. “Never mind. Well, at any rate, I’m sorry about your trip.”

He’s made nice headway on the rest of the crossword puzzle—some ten-odd minutes later, perhaps—when he hears Newton set down his scalpel with a clatter. Newton has been strangely, though blissfully, silent up until then, a stark departure from his mood upon arrival. “Hermann,” he says. Rubber snaps as he pulls off his work gloves, one by one. “Has anyone ever told you you have beautiful eyes?”

“Beautiful eyes?” Hermann snorts. “No. And someone’s told you that you do, I suppose?” Rather odd thing to get competitive over, but perhaps it’ll cheer him up.

“Why would someone tell me that?” Newton says.

Hermann looks up. Newton is still staring at him in that funny little way—almost dazed, Hermann realizes, as if someone’s smacked him upside the head, or he’s had a bit too much to drink. The last time Newton looked like that, he upended the contents of an ill-advised trip to a club for his birthday all over Hermann’s trousers. “What on earth is the matter?” Hermann says. “Are you feeling ill?”

“Your cheekbones drive me nuts,” Newton says.

“Did you hit your head?” Hermann says.

Newton crosses the lab in several quick, easy strides, and—to Hermann’s utter and abject confusion—swings himself down onto Hermann’s lap. Hermann stays stock-still as Newton burrows in against his neck. “Hermann,” he sighs. “Hermann—” His fingers slide up the back of Hermann’s scalp to toy with his hair, and Hermann’s hands fly out to grip his waist instinctively. “You must be the most gorgeous guy in the whole world. On the whole planet.”

Hermann makes a funny choking noise.

“And so smart,” Newton says, “and talented.” He twists a short strand of Hermann’s hair between his fingertips, and exhales heavily. His breath is warm against Hermann’s skin and sends goosebumps prickling across it. Hermann feels too-hot under his collar; his ears, he’s sure, are turning a spectacular red. “I can’t stop thinking about how much I want to kiss you, like, all the time, dude. Do you remember last month, when I cut my hand?”

Hermann nods, not trusting himself to speak. It was a rather frightening moment for them both: Newton pale, red human blood mingling with the blue of the kaiju’s on his workbench, his (red) scalpel dangling limply between his fingertips. It was why Hermann began insisting on his wearing work gloves in the laboratory after that. “I was distracted because I couldn’t stop looking at you,” Newton admits. “Your were wearing a new sweater, and all I wanted to do was go over there and...” 

He whispers something in Hermann’s ear. “Newton,” Hermann squeaks, eyes widening.

Newton pulls back just so slightly and looks at him. His mouth is inches away from Hermann’s—their noses so close as to bump together. Newton’s eyes drop to Hermann’s lips. His tongue darts out across his own, wetting them. “Dude. You know how much I...”

“Yes?” Hermann says.

“Ever since—”

“Since when?” Hermann says, eagerly. He can scarcely believe this is even happening—it feels as though all of his fantasies have come to life at once. 

Newton begins to lean in. In a heartbeat, Hermann will be kissing him. “Oh, Newton,” Hermann murmurs, and (shutting his eyes) reaches up to cup the back of Newton’s head.

Instead of feeling nothing but Newton’s soft, brown hair, however, he feels something vaguely...slimy, atop it. Slimy, and...pulsing. Hermann falls away from him with a yelp. “Newton, there’s something on your—!”

“Huh?” Newton says, and leans back in for a second attempt at a kiss. But Hermann dodges him and jerks Newton’s shoulder around to get a good look at the back of his head. There—right at the nape of his neck—some odd, small, blue little thing. Otherworldly leech, perhaps. Hermann’s stomach churns unpleasantly at the sight of it. “Is something wrong?” Newton says. He blinks innocently at Hermann behind his glasses.

“No!” Hermann says. The little thing stares innocently at Hermann, too, or at least it would if it had visible eyes. “Er—just had a few questions answered, I suppose. By Jove, Newton, you—”

“Hmm?” Kiss evidently forgotten, Newton begins to stroke the close-cropped part of Hermann’s hair. He gives a high-pitched giggle. “Your hair is so fuzzy.”

Right. Off to medical, it is. “Get off of me, please,” Hermann says, as calmly as he can manage. Apparently not as calmly as he intended: Newton flinches, and he scrambles to his feet as if Hermann had shouted it.

“Oh, dude, your leg! I wasn’t thinking, I’m sorry.”

“My what?” Hermann says. He glances down at his lap. His thighs are still tingling from Newton’s body—Newton’s warm, warm body, which Hermann had his hands on only moments prior... “Oh. Er. Yes. Right.” He coughs. “Would you hand me my cane, Newton?”

Newton obliges. Hermann pushes himself up, and grabs a firm hold of Newton’s hand; he steers them both out the laboratory door, Newton providing very little resistance. In fact, he appears even happy to follow Hermann. “Where are we going?” Newton says. Then he frowns. “Wait. Don’t you wanna make out with me?”

Hermann swears under his breath. “Believe me,” he grumbles, “I would like nothing more than that.” Then he says, louder, “We’re going to get...ice cream.”

“Oh!” Newton says. “Yay!”

The doctor on duty in medical doesn’t look surprised to see them. “I was wondering when Dr. Geiszler would be back in,” she says, as Hermann nudges Newton over the threshold. “What is it this time? Kaiju venom? Is he bleeding to death again?”

“Some sort of...parasite, I think,” Hermann says. “He’s been saying—” He clears his throat. “Odd things. He’s not quite himself.”

“I thought we were getting ice cream?” Newton says.

The doctor catches Hermann’s eye. “Yes, of course, it’s right back here, Dr. Geiszler,” she says, and ushers Newton into the examination room. When she catches sight of the back of Newton’s head, her eyebrows jump in alarm. To Hermann, she says, under her breath, “Oh.”

“Isn’t Hermann the hottest guy ever?” Newton asks her just as the door shuts behind them. Hermann blushes fiercely.

They emerge twenty minutes later, Newton clutching a small Tupperware container. Inside of it is the little blue leech. He grins when he sees Hermann. “Hey, dude, check this out!” He thrusts the Tupperware out so Hermann may take in a better view of it. “This was stuck to me! Isn’t that gnarly? I was wondering where it went.”

“Ah,” Hermann says. He hopes Newton doesn’t ask after his blush, which has yet to fade, and indeed only grown more prominent; the door to the examination room is rather thin, and he heard every single thing Newton said about him in those twenty minutes—extollations of everything from the various facets of Hermann’s physical appearance, to Hermann’s mental prowess, to what an, er, attentive lover he imagines Hermann would be. Most of these were in great detail. 

“It appears to be something of Anteverse origin,” the doctor tells them. “Some sort of leech which removes one’s inhibitions. Dr. Geiszler likely came into contact with it on one of his samples. I’m glad you brought him in when you did—I’m not sure what effects prolonged exposure would have.”

“I kinda want to keep it in a terrarium or something,” Newton says. “Isn’t it cute?”

The leech stares blankly out at Hermann, its blue body pulsing. Hermann suppresses a shudder of revulsion. “Bring him back in if his...condition returns,” the doctor finishes. “And, Dr. Geiszler—please keep an eye on that thing.”

“Sure thing,” Newton says, and then taps the Tupperware and begins to coo.

Hermann doesn’t ask the question that’s weighing on his mind until they’re almost back to the laboratory. “I don’t suppose you...remember the last hour?” he says.

“Nah,” Newton says. “One minute I was examining this little guy, the next, I was in medical.” The corners of his smile twitch down. “Why? I didn’t do anything too embarrassing, did I?” He punctuates this with an awkward laugh.

"No, no,” Hermann says, quickly. He can’t tell if the knowledge disappoints him or not, for surely if Newton did remember, he might feel a tad more courageous in, er...following up on things, so to speak. Removes inhibitions. Just bloody typical, isn’t it? “Not at all. Let’s get you back to the lab, shall we? I imagine we could both do with a cup of tea.”

[mst3kproject]

Countess Dracula

In Countess Dracula we have the tale of a lonely old woman who discovers that she can make herself young again, just so long as she doesn’t mind having to murder somebody to do it (she doesn’t).  Our antiheroine uses this newfound youth to seduce the least interesting man in the movie, until at last her misdeeds catch up with her when her latest victim turns out to have been the wrong demographic to make the magic work.

Does that sound familiar?  Yeah, this is a very Leech-Woman-y movie.  It stars Nigel Green, the news announcer from Gorgo, and comes to us from Hammer Studios, home of Moon Zero-Two.  The director, Peter Sasdy, never made anything that wound up on MST3K but he did work on the legendary Pia Zadora bomb, The Lonely Lady.  Countess Dracula is not a wild ride, as its pace is fairly sedate, but it is certainly a ride nonetheless.

The count of somewhere or other has just died, leaving his realm to his nineteen-year-old daughter Ilona – and technically also leaving his spiteful widow, Elizabeth, free to marry her longtime lover Captain Dobi.  Most people would consider this a perfectly acceptable retirement, but Elizabeth is impossible to satisfy.  She doesn’t want to grow old while Ilona (currently on her way home from finishing school in Vienna) rules the county and gets all the attention.  When Elizabeth discovers that bathing in the blood of virgins restores her youth, she embraces murder as a hobby and has Ilona locked up so she can stay in charge while posing as her own daughter!  In that guise she sets out to pursue handsome young Imre, the son of her husband’s most trusted general, while jealous Dobi can only sit and seethe.

I bet you think you can guess how this movie ends.  I bet you think Dobi tells Imre the countess’ secret, and the two of them defeat her.  Or else the real Ilona escapes and meets him, they expose Elizabeth as a fraud, and then get married and rule the land with justice and mercy or something.  That’s what would happen in a normal movie… but you guys know I don’t watch normal movies.  Maybe instead you’re guessing that nobody does shit and Elizabeth just carries on her merry way until she’d destroyed by her own hubris?  That’s more like it.

Not all of Hammer’s films were good, but they were generally pretty well-made and Countess Dracula is not an exception.  The elaborate costumes and sets are very nice, although areas like the town square are obviously artificial and the old lady makeup on Ingrid Pitt as Elizabeth is pretty bad.  There’s also a young woman made up in very ugly brownface as a ‘gypsy girl’, except they totally forgot to do any makeup on her for the scene where her naked corpse is discovered in the woods.

There are even a couple really well-done moments of storytelling and worldbuilding.  A scene in a pub, when everybody falls silent as Dobi and Imre enter, shows eloquently how terrified the peasants are of the aristocracy. Elizabeth gets some chilling bits when we see the true depth of her depravity.  She sees no difference between controlling people through love and controlling them through fear – either way, she gets what she wants, and their feelings don’t matter.  My favourite detail is the subtle cultural conflict going on in the background, as the characters speak disparagingly of ‘Turks’ and yet have clearly picked up some bits and pieces of Ottoman culture.

Although its plot outline is very similar to The Leech Woman, the philosophy of Countess Dracula is completely different.  The Leech Woman didn’t really give June a viable alternative to her poisoned fountain of youth.  Old women in its world can only sit around and drink and know that nobody loves them. Elizabeth, however, has a possible future – Dobi repeatedly notes that he’s been waiting twenty years for the opportunity to legitimatize his relationship with her.  He would have happily devoted himself to her for the rest of his life, and the two of them could have lived in retirement while Imre and Ilona gave them grandchildren to spoil.  Dobi even says there is dignity in age, directly contradicting The Leech Woman by applying it equally to both sexes.  June was more or less forced to become a monster, while Elizabeth chooses it explicitly.

So there’s honestly some pretty good stuff in this film.  Where it unfortunately falls on its face is with the characters, none of whom can really be said to have an arc, and the ending, which is rushed and unsatisfying.

The movie’s main focus is always on Elizabeth, but she refuses to grow or learn anything at any point.  She starts off as a nasty, selfish bitch and just stays a nasty, selfish bitch.  She has no actual master plan, but seems convinced that she can keep up this charade indefinitely, even though Dobi points out the impracticality of that.  Dobi believes she’s going mad, but the truth seems to be she’s just horrible.  She is evidently terrified of growing old, but that is never explored.  We see her react to aging, rather violently at times, but we never find out what the root of this fear is.

All this means that Elizabeth, despite being the focal character, is never sympathetic.  June in The Leech Woman at least started off as somebody we could pity, before she descended into depravity.  Elizabeth is a terrible person from the get-go, as illustrated in the very opening when she has her coachman run over a peasant who wants her to fulfill a promise her late husband made her.

Imre and Ilona are pretty much complete ciphers. Imre spends the entire movie in Elizabeth’s thrall one way or another.  He is madly in love with her in her guise as Ilona, and after finding out the truth he’s too scared of her to openly defy her.  The only personality trait he manifests is gullible foolishness, and any sympathy we might have had for him evaporates when he cheerfully kisses a barmaid’s tit on the same day when he’s proposed marriage to the woman he believes is his true love.  Ilona spends most of the movie locked up in some mute peasant’s hut doing not much. When she finally enters the story properly, she comes across as stunningly stupid.

The character who does the most to try to thwart Elizabeth is her lover Dobi, but he’s less interested in stopping her from killing virgins than he is in having her to himself.  He gets Imre drunk and tosses him in bed with the barmaid in the hope that Elizabeth will reject him, and later takes Imre to see Elizabeth bathing in blood to youthen herself.  These things don’t work, partly because Imre is an idiot and partly because Elizabeth is always more evil than he thought she was, but at least he tries.

At the end of the movie, Elizabeth’s latest bloodbath wears off in the middle of her wedding to Imre, and she runs off to murder Ilona in order to make herself young again.  Imre tries to stop her and gets stabbed for his trouble, which does at least expose Elizabeth’s evildoing to one and all, and she and Dobi are hanged. What happens to Ilona I’m not sure, but I know they didn’t have therapists in the seventeenth century.  Nobody wins here.  It’s a downer for everybody, including the superstitious peasants, who will continue to be terrified of their rulers now that their worst fears have been confirmed.

Several things might be made of the fact that it’s young women Elizabeth is killing.  It’s interesting to note that the idea of male virginity is never even brought up.  We could contrast two depictions of motherhood, in the form of Elizabeth’s jealousy of Ilona versus Juli the nurse’s unconditional love for her.  There’s Imre’s description of ‘Ilona’ as embodying all aspects of womanhood, to which Dobi replies that no woman can be maiden, mother, and whore all at once… yet that is just what Elizabeth is trying to be.  What I find interesting in this, however, is how the movie depicts Elizabeth’s own internalized misogyny, in the fucked-up attitudes she displays towards youth, beauty, and gender.

Elizabeth feels that age and experience have made her undesirable.  Dobi assures her that he finds her as attractive as he ever did, but she evidently does not believe him, and her mistreatment of her female servants has a definite note of jealousy in it.  She kills young virgins not only to gain their desirability, but because she hates them for what they have and she does not.

What’s unusual is that she applies this same attitude towards the men in her life.  Elizabeth is no longer attracted to Dobi, because he is old and experienced. Their affair has gone on for years, and in Dobi’s mind this has only deepened his love for her – but Elizabeth is tired of it and wants something new.  Imre is young, handsome, and innocent.  He has no wealth of his own and has not yet really accomplished much in life, but Elizabeth doesn’t care.  If all she has to be is young and pretty, then how could she ask anything more of him?

Here, Dobi and Elizabeth represent two different versions of gender equality as it applies to sexual attractiveness, with him raising Elizabeth to his level, and her lowering Dobi and Imre to hers!  Elizabeth treating the men in her life as she has been treated illustrates the inequality quite sharply, but what ultimately destroys her is applying the same standards to herself.  She believes so totally that nothing else matters as long as she is beautiful that she doesn’t care what she has to do to accomplish it, or who sees her do it.  In the end, she is undone by her own self-loathing.