#and how there is stanley calling ON THE STREET.

[arrrion]

Desperate

Stanxeno x female reader

Synopsis: you've been kidnapped by Stanley and Xeno because your husband had done them wrong.

Disclaimers: kidnapping, violence, insults, husband's a coward, your mind is in bad shape.

Yes I published this when it wasn't finished. You didn't see anything 👀

Every time I think of stanxeno it's always kind of dark??

Night had fallen for a moment already and here you were, in the streets, your heels hitting the ground, the only ambient noise. You had just left work, extra hours that won't change your paycheck, and were heading home. You could already hear your husband yell at you about the time.

Your life was a mess. You have a terrible dating history, the reason why you married this man. Your mom taught you how much you needed to finish your life married to someone, you never questioned her. You were never interested in that kind of relationship but had tried so many times. In the end a man proposed to you but this was never the start of your happy married life.

He doesn't work, he spends your money. It's more of a nuisance in your life. You studied hard only to have a poorly paid job, because your husband doesn't want you to "be afar from him". And you listened.

You slow down, finally stopping a little further on. Was it really your life? Living with a man that probably doesn't love you and uses you?

You clench your fist. You have to continue the play. You can't finish your life alone, right?

You take a step forward but suddenly a force pulls you violently to the side. A hand covers your mouth but you don't struggle.

·———————·

You're tired. Your phone keeps vibrating on the small table across where you're sitting. You already know who is calling like this, and a heavy sigh escapes from your lips.

You can't see a thing but you don't mind. Your eyes are always looking low so it's not uncomfortable for you. Your feet are attached to the chair, but unlike what you were expecting, your hands were actually tied with each other but they were resting on your legs. You could actually stand up but you won't do that. You didn't plan to escape. And even if you really wanted to, it was dumb to try and run with your feet tied to a chair, not forgetting the blindfolds.

You weren't calm though. Whatever was happening was stressing you out.

But by the look of it, Your attackers didn't intend to cause any harm, at least not yet.

Your shoes were missing, and your feet touched the cold floor. You actually had a pillow for your back. What kind of situation was this ?

Your thoughts were cut short when a door, that you guessed was behind you, opened and footsteps approached you. You could tell it was a tall man, probably taller than your husband. By the sound of it, he was wearing boots that were making a strong noise. He probably was indeed unpleased to be here, you could tell.

He stopped just behind you. You recognized the strong smell of cologne. The same odor that was present a millisecond before your nose was blocked by a hand.

The blindfold is removed and you can see an orange light that comes from beneath you. The room is bigger than you thought. You quickly see the table where your phone is still ringing silently. This is where the man is heading. Golden locks swings with every step he takes.

Now that you see him completely, you are right. He is indeed taller and much more muscular. His appearance tells you that he isn't in need of money. You deduce that he is not a member of some gross gang of drunkards. No you are in a bigger problem.

"Damn, this phone won't stop buzzing." Back turned, the stranger takes your phone in his hand. "What's the password, miss." He faces you this time.

"There is no password, sir" You copied his tone. You don't have a password because your husband is suspicious of his own wife.

"Uh. Boring." He unlocked it and nodded when it actually didn't have a password. You watch him go through all of your informations. You move one of your feet, you wanted to scratch it but couldn't.

Time passes like this. You look everywhere, searching for something to pick your attention while the stranger is still on your phone. It takes him lots of time to find what he wants, another man enters. You see him upside down, your head resting on the back of the chair.

"Stan." The other man raised his head. "Did you find something." This man has silver hair that doesn't move much when he walks to you.

"Nah. There isn't even something funny in here." 'Stan' let go of your phone and he too, walks to you. "So what do we do of her, Xe'?" Here it comes.

They start to argue on the topic but you stop listening. In brief, you were kidnapped by those two. It's not hard to guess who's fault it is. But what did he do? The question is picking on you.

"Excuse me, would one of you have the amiability to tell me what my husband did?" They stop talking and Stanley burst out laughing. Xeno isn't pleased at all. His fingers land violently on your chin and his face moves dangerously close. He seems to want to intimidate you, but you don't flinch.

"Your husband played a game and lost. We've been waiting for our rewards but nothing came." His voice is terribly low.

"I see. If it's money you want, his broke. He probably played with mine."

"We know that, doll. That's why you're here." Now you were fixed. Your husband did something wrong and you were gonna pay for him. You sighed. "Oh don't make that look, dear. He is the one that told us to take you if he loses." Your head raised quickly. What did he just say?

"What ?" Your husband really threw you out? And he dared to call you non-stop like he cared? For the first time, you felt anger against him. You had accepted the way he treated you but only because he was kind enough to take you as his wife. Your nails went in your skin, your teeth clenched.

So your husband used you as an exit card? He views your marriage only as something he can dispose of, right?

An idea got into your mind. A bad idea indeed. But what else can you do when you just got thrown away like this ?

"Can you guys get rid of a marriage certificate?" You asked out of the blue. Stanley was surprised by what you said. He looked at Xeno whose smile was growing wide.

"Yes. We can." Both Xeno and you looked at each other with determination, like you both understood what idea you had. Stanley, who obviously didn't get it, looked at you like a lost child.

"Wait, wait, wait. What are you guys thinking ?!" Xeno turned to look at his best friend while you smirked.

"I have a mission for you Stanley, can you do it?" Stanley nodded.

Oh god what is he diving into?!

·———————·

Like you had asked, your certificates of marriage was broken. You don't know how they did it or what connection they have to do so, but you are free from your now ex husband.

But this is only for a short period.

Unbeknownst to Stanley, Xeno and you had planned a revenge. He doesn't even know how you passed from prisoner to coworkers with his best friend.

And now he is wearing a white suit, waiting for you to get married. He really fell from his chair when you had announced to him that you will marry him next. Xeno had told him that he couldn't marry you because he was less husband material than him. Whatever that was about. He knew it was only for Xeno's entertainment.

Now that you are freshly new weds, you didn't go on vacation, instead the three of you prepared the downfall of your ex husband.

Getting married again was the first step.

You passed months with them. You would help Xeno's with his researchs. Even if they both were part of a kind of gang, they had normal activities most of the time. Only at night would they do the bad things.

You would spend all morning with Xeno, your opinion was helpful to him and having an assistant was useful. And of course you liked listening to him ramble about his results. You don't understand everything but you don't care. You love his voice, and if you really want to understand he is more than happy to teach you.

At noon, you prepare dinner. It's almost always quiet. Sometimes Stanley turns the TV on and you comment about it but usually you all don't speak while eating. It's cosy, you think.

Then in the afternoon you would go with Stanley to do some errands. He was a very good driver. You liked to look at him. The aura he has when he drives just hypnotises you. You help him to carry what he buys even if he always ends up carrying the majority. He appreciates your efforts. You are capable on your own and he acknowledges that.

When the evening comes. You follow them at different places. From what you understand, they are an organization that has different divisions. They are the bosses of one. You only saw one other division that was ruled by a guy with green weird hair. You were surprised to learn he was younger than you.

Most of the time they just patrol over the places they own. They told you they were in a peaceful year, the reason Xeno is okay to play with your revenge. You had actually thought of this. Why would they help you? Stanley told you he only does it because Xeno does. And Xeno does it because he liked your idea. You didn't ask more.

Of course, they are tracking your ex husband. Now that you are gone he is getting help from others. He told everyone how his precious wife disappeared and how sad he was. Without telling them that the money he takes from them goes to the casino.

You were really furious when you found out about his fake acting about you. How dare he pretend he is worried. He probably thinks you died by now. But you were waiting for him to fall in a deep hole.

You collected the names of the person helping him. You spread rumors in his back and some of them quit helping.

Xeno made sure he was continuing to spend time in the casino. He hired a mentalist called Gen to make sure he would never win a single bet.

And then it came. People that helped him were gone. Money he was losing never came back. He never won one of the games, Gen always told him the next one was the one but obviously it was only to ruin him.

It was time for you to enter. Accompanied by Stanley, you both walked to his table. He didn't recognize you at first. You were gorgeous in your outfit. And Stanley was even more magnificent.

But it finally clicked when he heard you talk. He yelled your name that loud and everyone turned to you.

"Oh my! If it isn't my ex husband!" You faked your surprise.

"Oh my god, name you are safe! I was so worried!" He is actually happy to see you. But only because he hopes you will come back to him. "Let's go back home now!"

"Home? Oh no no no, we are no longer sharing a 'home' dear"

"What do you mean? You have to come back with me."

"Come back with you? What nonsense are you saying?"

"We are married, you have to come with me!"

"Married ? No, we are not. Not anymore."

"What?! Since when?!"

"Since you throw me to death for your own good!" Everyone at the table was shocked. They all looked at him with disgust, whispering among themselves about this. "And don't dare pretend I'm a liar. I have all the proof that you wanna play."

"Even though. You're still married to me. I didn't sign shit ! You belong to me!" You laugh at his words.

"You see, we did actually divorce. And now, I'm married to this handsome guy over here. My pretty boy, Stanley" The last words weren't in the script, nor was the kiss you placed on his cheek.

You smiled at him with love. People here tend to love this kind of drama. With the scene you made, you were sure that your ex husband would be looked down in every casino he went to.

Stanley put his arms around your waist and smiled, your cheeks touching each other. You giggle at the feeling. It was nice. Real nice.

Your ex-husband wasn't that pleased about this. He was about to burst out of anger when Xeno appeared. He was here for the final act.

"Oh my! What do we have here! If it isn't my good client!" He faked his affection and placed himself next to him. The jerk you married before was stunned. He recognized Xeno, it was against him he lost. "I have to thank you. With your elegant loss last time, I took good care of your girl. Look, isn't she pretty with my best man?" It felt weird being talked like this by Xeno, but you knew he was only doing this for the play.

Now that Xeno himself had made the official what this man did to you, the people started to yell at him to get lost. It was satisfactory. Seeing him distressed by all the yelling at him.

"Now, now. Let's all calm down. As much as I am grateful for the gift, you are not welcomed here anymore. You can accompany yourself to the exit because my staff is better than this."

You could finally breathe. Your hand falls on Stanley's shoulder and you can't help but hug him. You know that after all this you will probably divorce him too. But you will cherish the sensation of feeling loved by this man. Him and Xeno.

Feeling you tense, Stanley hugs you bridal style and you leave the room. He enters Xeno's office and puts you on a chair. Your hand immediately clenches on the fabric of your clothes. Head down, you think you could cry. Stanley, sitting on the chair next to you, seems to have caught on what you feel.

"What is it dear. You seem kind of sad for someone that finally crushed her enemy." You open your mouth but not a single sound escapes. A minute passes before your head rises, little tears about to fall.

"I...I don't want it to stop." You feel dumb. You know they only did it because Xeno wanted some fun. But you needed to tell it before you disappeared from their life. "I never experienced this much happiness before. I felt at ease with both of you. I think...I think it's what I should've felt with my husband..." Your head goes back down, eyes closed as tears fell to the ground.

You heard Xeno rising from his chair. Stanley hand enveloped yours. You looked at him, surprised. He was smiling gently at you. Then you felt something kneeling next to you. Your eyes almost fell from your orbit when you saw Xeno, on the knee on the ground, hands showing you a little box with a ring similar to the one you have with Stan.

"Your right, name, I never felt that happy with someone else than Stanley. So won't you mind being mine too?"

And you jump on him, yelling so many 'yes'.

You may regret marrying your ex husband but, thanks to that you met your two new husbands. This time you can understand why your mom wanted you to get married.

It's been several days since I started this. I had a vague idea of the plot but had a hard time connecting my ideas. So I hope it still please you!

See you next time!

[sobeksewerrat]

oh the urge to actually create that victorian sh&co au idea i had a while ago is strong

[currently-becoming-potatoes]

List of words for the computer:

LONG POST- more under the cut

STANFORD- Pulls up a file on Stanford Pines, written by an unknown scientist. It discusses his extra finger and praises his intelligence, as well as calling him the “next evolution in the human species”.

BILL CIPHER- Takes you to the Wikipedia page for the Eye of Providence. Also took me to a Sesame Street video about a Jazzy Triangle and a Square. Not sure what prompted the change.

STANLEY PINES: Takes you to a list of EBay listings for brass knuckles.

FIDDLEFORD: Takes you to the music video for Cotton Eye Joe by Rednex.

SHERMIE: Nothing. I sure do wish we got some lore about Grandpa Pines.

GRAVITY FALLS: The text on the computer reads “never heard of it” and the red light on the bottom turns green.

ALEX HIRSCH: Leads to Google Images for “flannel”. Huh.

WEIRDMAGEDDON: Pulls up an article from the Gravity Falls Gossiper about how nothing happened at all and there was no apocalypse.

DISNEY: Screen reads “rat.gif censored for your protection”

SOOS: Leads to a page of writing from Soos himself, referencing many things (including Tad Strange being gay and madly in love with Woodpecker Guy. Love wins!!!)

DIPPER: Leads to a creepy yellow parchment with a message from Bill Cipher himself trying to trick Dipper into blinding himself by staring at the sun for 13 hours straight! Silly! (Also if you keep clicking on it, the page gets darker and blurrier until it implies we've gone blind)

MABEL: Causes stickers to appear on every available surface. Clicking it enough times leads to message “lab now fully Mabelized”.

WENDY: Leads to a note from Wendy that mentions a way to ward off evil triangles written in the bottom corner of the book.

GIDEON: Makes a web recording of Gideon scatting play. It ends with “I love you forever Mabel”. Please shut the fuck up you little creep.

TAD STRANGE: Plays a video of bread with smooth jazz in the background.

TOBY DETERMINED: Leads to a Google search for a restraining order. Holyyyyy shittttttt

WHO ARE YOU: “I could ask you the same question”

SEASON 3: “Season Two”. I guess that’s that lol

This was about all I could find. Please reblog with anything else you can discover! Thank you, fellow Gravity Falls enjoyers!

And make sure to give some love to all the wonderful folks down in the comments! Many of these answers and tips come from what they've found. I can't list everyone, unfortunately- I didn't expect this post to get popular- but, to everyone who's helped out, THANK YOU.

FURTHER EDITS:

BLIND EYE: Pulls up an optometrist’s eye exam. Each line reads “WKHBOOVHH”. Too lazy to translate atm.

PIÑATA: Bill Cipher getting beaten to death /hj

MASON: A note from Dipper listing several anagrams of Gravity Falls characters’ names. You can check in the comments for the answers.

AXOLOTL: “You ask alotl questions”. Thanks for the pun, Alex, but I’m kind of losing my mind rn

MYSTERY SHACK: Leads to a Google search for Confusion Hill, the real-life Mystery Shack!

MYSTERY: “?”

MONSTER: Leads to several YouTube videos for “There’s a Monster at the End of this Book.”

VALLIS CINERIS: Leads to an analog-horror-esque video of Baby Bill and his parents, who have been blotted out by static, and a voice repeating “WHY DID YOU DO IT” over and over again until you stop the video.

PORTAL: “Portal.exe has been deleted. I bet you could build a new one.”

GIFFANY: You need to put it in multiple times. Several warnings about breaching firewall, followed by a message from GIFFANY saying “SOOS! I still love you!” or smth like that, and then GIFFANY herself briefly appearing onscreen. Trying again after that summons her more. Also lets you download some ZIP files.

DORITO: Summons an image of a spinning Dorito, followed by the most cursed image of Bill Cipher I have ever seen.

GOD: A short video of an axolotl in a tank with a Bill Cipher statue plays. This is Alex’s axolotl, shown in the Book of Bill countdown.

REALITY: “Is an illusion”

FILBRICK: “I’m not impressed”

CARYN: “I knew you were gonna write that”

GLASS SHARD BEACH: Leads to an image of the New Jersey Hell Hole.

ANY CUSS WORD: Pulls up a paper reading “NOT S&P APPROVED. WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP” with an image of soap below.

MATPAT: Leads to a video of MatPat next to a conspiracy board, holding the Book of Bill. He tells us we’re on our own.

BABBA: Plays an audio recording of Dipper singing BABBA. Not Disco Girl, a different song.

CRAZ: Leads to the Jem and the Holograms theme.

XYLER: See above.

AD ASTRA PER ASPERA: Shows us two new journal pages from Ford and Mabel, studying the Cipher statue. They’re definitely worth the read, I teared up looking at them.

ANSWER: “Question”

QUESTION: “Answer”

SEASON ONE: “Season -1: Antigravity Falls”

SEASON TWO: “Season 1” …maybe scratch what I said about Season 3. Or don’t. Things are starting to damage my brain.

CURSED (got from @slimslamflimflam decoding the candle! Thanks!): Shows two pages talking about the dangers of drawing triangles, with the bottom of the second page showing several drawings of Bill and the words “HE IS COMING, RUN”

THE UNIVERSE: “Hologram”

RIZZ: “Life privileges revoked. Now releasing poison gas.” This response is repeated if you type in SKIBIDI or FORTNITE.

BABY: Shows an ultrasound of a fetus Bill Cipher, captioned “Look at what’s growing inside you! See you in nine months, papa!”

JOURNAL 3: “The Journal for Me”

PACIFICA: Leads to a note from Pacifica calling Bill Cipher “ick” and telling us to follow her on social media under “Platinum Paz”

PLATINUM PAZ: Pulls up an image of Northwest Manor with the llama symbol overlaid and a “NW” logo beneath. There's also a short story beneath!

LOVE: Leads to an audiobook of “The Love Triangle”. Need to read later.

BLENDIN: “The time agent lost and presumed incompetent”. Uh…?

SCARY: Leads to another audiobook of a cheesy Goosebumps-esque horror novel written by Bill himself, apparently.

DIVORCE: Shows you the logo of the bar Bill went to after his fight with Ford… Billford bitter exes confirmed

ROBBIE: Leads to the cringiest messages ever. He’s such a failure I love him

CONSPIRACY: Leads to a video of a man losing his mind over the countdown counting up. I feel so seen. (I have been informed that his name is Charlie Day, he's an actor from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and that one meme, he had a quote on the back of the Book of Bill, thanks to everyone who explained that to me, I'm sorry, I'm uncultured)

RAT: “Thurburt’s number?”

BLANCHIN: Leads to a YouTube video on how to blanch vegetables.

TJ ECKLEBURG: “Never mention that name again.”

NOTHING: “Something”

SOMETHING: “Nothing”

BURNSIDE: “Burned inside.” Well… at least we know what happened…

WADDLES: Leads to the pig placement network!

THERAPRISM: Pulls up a sign from the theraprism regarding an emergency situation. The code reads "THE OLD ONE".

SHAPE: Pulls up an article on Plato, triangles, and Ancient Greece. This article is presumably written by Bill.

LLIB and BILL: THIS leads to the Sesame Street video every time.

WEIRD: Shows a video of a frightened Weird Al panicking about being trapped in a computer. Sorry, man...

CLONE: Pulls up an image of Paper Jam Dipper, a warning about not getting him too close to liquids, and an option to print.

TRIANGLE: ")" or "Tri harder."

THEYLLSEE: "Is seeing believing?"

DEER TEETH: "For you, kid!"

LIFE: "Life: 72% complete. Now loading: death."

DEATH: "Life's goth cousin."

PINES: "A good family tree."

OWL TROWEL: A slab of hieroglyphs, translating to an ancient ad for an owl trowel.

SCALENE: "Life form not found." EUCLID has the same outcome.

WELL WELL WELL BEING: Some assorted notes from Bill's Theraprism file. These include his greatest love and fear, his art therapy notes, and notes on his phobias. Three clicks is required to read them all.

BOO BERRY: Offers a poem on the meaning of life! Wow! I feel so enlightened!

LOVE YA BRO: Shows us a doodle from Stan of one of his and Ford's Sea Grunks adventures, and another code on the back. It translates to "Kings of New Jersey." I've been told it lets you download the code as a font.

SORRY: Reveals the repaired Backupsmore photo, with a note from Fiddleford about his and Ford's growing friendship. Fiddauthor fans, we are eating well tonight!

HORROR: Pulls up an image and report on The Always Garden, which is essentially a cheap Italian restaurant hidden in the backrooms.

HOLOGRAM: "Universe."

NAITSUAF: Pulls up a page that looks like it would be from the Book of Bill, in which Bill tries to convince us to sell us his soul. Clicking "ARE YOU READY?" pulls up a contract where we can sell our soul to Bill (with an alarming amount of coded fine print. Will need to translate later). You can print this document out, back out, or sign it right there on the web. Hitting "SIGN" causes the words "PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU!" to appear, and the document to close. In other words, I no longer have a soul.

IMSTILLONYOURMIND: Plays a recording of the ocean, with Stan faintly talking in the background. Poor Ford ain't quite over the divorce yet...

HOTXOLOTL: Pulls up a "MOST WANTED" doc on the henchmaniacs.

SEVENEYES: Pulls up a faded polaroid of The Oracle with text on the back that reads "LEAVE HIM. Escape to dimension *blurred out*. It's against the rules but it's the only reality where you'll be safe from him." The code at the bottom (once again decoded by the powerhouse that is @slimslamflimflam) reads "Set a course for Dimension: R34LITY." Is another Cipher Hunt in the makes? Only time will tell, hehehe.

JUST FIT IN: Plays an old commercial with a few moments of speech in the glitches at the end.

EVEN HIS LIES ARE LIES: Shows a transcript from a therapy session at the Theraprism. Bill discusses his relationship with Ford and cuts off the session when someone brings up his parents.

NOT A PHASE: Shows a Google search for "black hair dye stained an entire bathroom."

PAPER IS BOOK SKIN: Instantly downloads a page of fleshy pink paper with the word "ENJOY" written on it!

SHAVE YOUR GRANDMA: Pulls up a few more pages about the human life cycle.

LIES: Pulls up an image of "The Game of Lies" board game, with a long stretch of text from (I assume) Bill, ending with "LIE UNTIL YOU ARE NOT LYING ANYMORE." Someone has some issues...

SAY BAAAA: Pulls up a neat little rhyme about being Bill Cipher's obedient flock of sheep. The code at the end translates to "Black Sheep."

ONE EYED KING: Plays a video of a hypnotist's spiral, with Bill proclaiming "YOU WANT TO PLEDGE YOUR SOUL TO BILL CIPHER" in the background. There is also morse code that translates to "NAITSUAF", leading to a previous discovery- the soul contract.

TANTRUM: Pulls up a transcript of a spat between Bill and Time Baby.

TITANS BLOOD: "HOOT HOOT! Password please!"

CURSE WITTEBANE: Pulls up an image of a Bill Cipher ouija board.

FORDTRAMARINE: Pulls up several rejected files from Ford trying to convince us Fordtramarine exists.

SUCK IT MERLIN: Pulls up a tapestry of Bill riding a unicorn. The code at the top reads "DAY MARE VS NIGHTMARE."

HEY NERD: Plays a commercial advertising things such as a Bill Cipher calendar, the Scrubba-Bill, a severed hand, and the entire Cygnus-XIII galaxy. Half of the image can be found in the Book of Bill.

DESTRUCTION IS THE FORM OF CREATION: Pulls up a frantic page of notes from post-portal-shit Fiddleford. A sticky note at the bottom has a code that reads "Unreality."

RUBBERHOSE: Plays "The World is Small Ever After for All."

IRREGULAR: Shows us Bill's mugshot in color. The code below reads "No prison or attention span can hold him."

UNREALITY: Offers a guide by Bill on how to become immortal.

GUN: "Oh yes oh yes oh yes they both."

ABUELITA: Leads to a video on vacuuming the walls.

YES: "What's McGucket's favorite soda?"

NO: "Your loss..."

REPEATEDLY CLICKING STAN: This stuff deserves a section of its own, away from the OG Stan stuff. It takes you through several Ebay listings on various Stan-ish items until you get to a page written by Bill about Stan's secret shames. "Ex-wives" further confirms our theory on Stan and Eda's relationship, as well as revealing many other bits of lore. "Fears" is somewhat goofy to be honest. "Secret Shames" reveals that Stan is a fanfiction writer and that his mother is the only member of his family who truly loves him outside of Ford and the kids. "Unreported Crimes" is somewhat goofy as well. "Failed Products" basically confirms that Stan is that world's Alex. "Lowest Moments" is genuinely depressing, and "Darkest Thought". Well. I'm not spoiling it lol. And the bit on "How He Beat Me" causes Bill to get more and more frantic/angry the more you click it! Comedy GOLD!

DIPPY FRESH: Leads to a Reddit post of the Burger King Kids Club.

MEOW: Leads to a TikTok of a man playing the Gravity Falls theme on that cap keyboard.

HELP ME: Pulls up another video of Alex's axolotl and the tiny statue. Rip Bill ig :/

R34LITY: Pulls up several photos of the henchmaniacs in live-action, captioned "They found a new home."

JOURNAL 1: "The journal of fun."

JOURNAL 2: "The journal for you."

FBI: "Your webcam is on. We are watching."

BURNED INSIDE: Shows an image of a charred Oregon Parks badge and nametag on the ground.

HECTORING: Plays a silly little country song!

OROBOROUS: Pulls up two journal pages about Fiddleford buying Ford an axolotl to keep him company, and Bill subsequently telling Ford to get rid of him. There's also some code on the first page that reads "CHONKY BOY." Ford, you wonderful dork.

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

More of Stanley's sketchbook because he makes me sick /pos

(Just imagine he was looking in a mirror at the subway to draw this anshfhwj. The london bus ticket is unrelated, it's just a random knick knack he had lying around<3)

People weren't the only ones Stan met on the streets.

------

+ this is an absolute fucking batshit WILD oneshot I initially wrote for these drawings that got WAY out of hand, if you feel like reading that.

The oneshot below is a stand-alone now, and in no way is related to the drawings above, but I just wanted to show you guys because Jesus Christ

------

Winter of 1981, at a subway station Stan doesn't remember the name of-

The sorry excuse of a transport system that this hellhole of a city called a functioning subway was hardly anyone's first choice of a warm place to stay the night. And yet, here Stanley was; standing like an idiot in the middle of a small bustling stairwell that led down to the full screeching chaos of a train stop on a Tuesday evening. A rowdy crowd of exhausted office workers streamed out like a tidal wave from the entrance of the station, the bustle of their footsteps all too eager to go home and relax after a long day of work.

The faint, stuffy stench of old piss and sweat followed the crowd to the surface from the deep depths of a less than sanitary and overcrowded train station. The pungent smell intermingled with the crisp stinging winter air in a cocktail of shitty city gloom often associated with this time of the year; when the holidays were too far away and the sun seemed to come and go with practically the same 9 to 5 schedule as the workers had, leaving them going to work in the pitch dark and coming back out in the inky black as well.

He might have looked like he belonged there, depending on how one would want to look at it. He stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the sea of prim, pressed suits and neart uniforms. His ratty old jacket and generally unwashed appearance certainly didn’t help his case, but he also knew that stations like these also tended to shelter quite a number of homeless wanderers like him, especially during the winter. So, it wasn't exactly uncommon to see other sore thumbs seeking reprieve from the biting cold and the dangerous likelihood of frostbite from within the enclosed walls of the subway station.

Heck, if most of these underground kingdoms didn't also happen to be a breeding ground for several illicit activities, he might even have followed their lead. But, believe it or not, Stanley's already had enough experience with illegal activities to last him a last time, and he isn't looking for a new fill. He was satisfied with what meager shelter his trusty car offered him, as little a difference it might make in terms of safety.

Stanley's obstruction of the already narrow stairs with his loitering went unappreciated, as shoulders roughly shoved past him and swinging briefcases repeatedly bumped into his sides, usually coupled with a nasty glare and a snide comment or two. He paid them no mind, however. He wasn't here to start a fight with some random bum with a dead end job, as much as he thought it would probably do them both some good to duke their stresses out on one another.

The hours ticked by with wave after wave of new crowds being dropped off by a train and left to pour out of the station into the streets. By the time the streetlights turned on and the pale pink in the sky slowly faded to make way for the stark glittery black of the night sky, the tide of people had slowed to a trickle and rush hour was long since over. He was now the stairs’ sole occupier, with a few occasional stragglers stumbling up the steps and hurrying past him without a second glance.

Stanley did not move from his spot, however. He stood resolutely in the middle of the stairway, fervently rubbing his arms and stamping his feet in a futile attempt to try and regain feeling in his extremities as he waited. Rocking on his heels, he titled his head backwards to let his eyes roam the constellations that carpeted the endless expanse of the sky stretched out above his head, almost losing himself in the scintillating canvas of stars.

It reminded him of old times; of the sparkling beach sand twinkling in the dim moonlight, and the soft sound of lilting waves hovering in the background as he lay back on the cold wooden deck of his ship and watched the stars dance.

He still remembered every name his brother had once recited to him time and time again as he pointed out each star and galaxy from the night sky.

Then, like clockwork, he was broken out of his reveries by a telltale meow coming from below. The sound was a familiar blanket that immediately melted away the tension that had begun to build in his chest as he practically sagged with relief.

His body moved almost automatically as he leaned down to detach the frail tabby cat that was attempting to literally fuse with his legs, purring up a storm and rubbing her head against his pants as though her life depended on it. The cat gave a soft chirrup of dissatisfaction at being manhandled, which Stanley absentmindedly replied with a chiding click of his tongue as he lifted her up his chest and gently tucked her into his jacket in a practiced motion.

She thankfully remained blissfully limp in his grasp as he shifted around some more so that she was nestled comfortably inside the dark pocket of warmth inside his ratty jacket. The tiny warm lump that rumbled contently against his front radiated with heat, and his fingers finally began to feel like actual fingers rather than useless stiff frigid lumps of meat and bone attached to his palms.

A pointed cough startled him from his clumsy wriggling to get the cat to settle down. An oddly familiar security guard stood at the entrance of the station at the bottom of the stairs, leveling Stanley an unimpressed look with the metal gate in his grip already halfway closed, ready to seal the subway for the night. He must have been a comical sight; caught awkwardly bent over while trying to get his newly acquired cat to stop kneading biscuits on his stomach, with said cat peeking out from the gap between his collars.

Stanley faintly recognized the guard. He was a much older man, with a shock of thinning white hair neatly tucked underneath a dark blue cap and a strange depth in his eyes that reminded Stanley of the sea; with countless unspoken truths lurking far beneath the surface, but no less grand and knowing of all that the universe had to offer, as though he had already lived a thousand lives before this one.

He had seen the man around before, at another station, doing the opposite of his job by ushering stray buskers and homeless stragglers from the streets and into the (relatively) safe walls of the subway, instead of doing what any other law-abiding security guard would do and kick them out into the elements. He wasn't sure what the older man was doing here, of all places, since all the previous stations he'd seen the man at had been several states over, practically on the other side of the country.

A brief spark of panic shot through his spine at the thought that this man could be following him, but he quickly discarded the ridiculous notion as soon as it entered his mind. He had never even seen him before, and hardly ever even interacted with him; there was no reason for there to be any sort of bad blood between them. Unless he happened to be related to one of Stanley's many, many enemies, then perhaps his fear was a little warranted.

However, the old guard made no move to attack or do anything other than stare judgmentally, almost expectantly. For the first time in a long time, Stanley felt like a child being caught doing something he wasn't supposed to do. He tried his best to keep his uncomfortable squirming to a minimum under the unrelenting gaze, stubbornly returning the man's gaze with his own wary glare. His cat’s muffled whining came from inside his jacket. The traitor, she was leaving him to deal with the old man on his own.

With an exasperated jerk of his head, the security guard gestured towards the inside of the station. For a moment, Stanley stared dumbly, uncomprehending of what the old man could possibly want from him. Rolling his eyes, this time the man gestured more insistently at the small gap that still remained between the metal gate and the entrance, his arm sweeping the air in a low arc as he dramatically urged Stanley inside. Suddenly, it clicked, and Stanley shook his head.

“I have a car,” he said plainly, his voice echoing loudly in the desolate silence of the winter night that surrounded the unlikely pair.

He wasn't sure why he was so nervous, it wasn't as though he was lying. He did have a car, his trusty Stanley-mobile was parked safely away in the corner of an unassuming alley that wasn't often frequented by anyone. There was no way he was reaching it tonight, though; it was practically on the other side of the city, much too far away for him to arrive at a reasonable time. His nightly excursions to meet his small friend unfortunately left him with no other choice than to leave his car behind, the hunk of metal far too unwieldy and noticeable to drive around openly on the streets. He never knew who could be watching, after all.

He had simply been hoping to find himself a dark corner to tuck himself into with his cat, just for the night, but it seemed as though the universe had other plans. Or rather, this strange old man had other plans.

Although, if Stanley thought about it, the subway wasn't such a bad suggestion. This was one of the safer stations in the city; and with the rich neighborhoods being so close by, no rogue criminal or dealers dared to come near this area unless they wanted to be slapped with a hefty fine or face a higher potential to be arrested. And of course, there was the obvious shelter from the unrelenting cold that now seemed to permeate his bones, even with the purring warmth that was nestled inside his jacket.

So, that was how he found himself hunkering down for the night inside a shabby old subway station, with a satisfied cat still rumbling away against his chest and a strange old security guard locking down the gates behind him. The man said nothing as he hooked his keys back onto his belt and gave a firm pat on Stanley's shoulders as he walked past him, pausing to scratch his cat behind her ears before moving away. His footsteps bounced off of the grimy tiled walls with an odd reverb as he turned a corner.

“You'll be safe in here,” the man said, voice sage and gravelly. The words had a weight to them, and seemed to hang in the air with such a presence it was as though the old man had never even left his side.

The subway was empty, quiet. It was such a stark contrast to the loud rowdiness of the rush hour crowd these halls once held. Stanley hadn't yet registered the utter silence of the station as he aimlessly made his way down the winding, deserted halls of the ancient station. He mindlessly walked past the aged and peeling advertising posters plastered on the walls, his nose becoming accustomed to the stinging stench of the subway. The quiet seemed to swallow the sound of his steps as he explored the branching paths and endless tunnels. They were almost kaleidoscopic, dizzying, nonsensical. There were doors where there shouldn't be, and deadends where it didn't make sense.

The silence only began to truly settle in his bones the more he walked. He suddenly wished that he would head the telltale footsteps of the old security guard again, just to hear another sign of life in this underground hellscape other than himself. The ghostly memories of screeching trains and bustling crowds haunted the halls; now, only nothingness reigned supreme. He glanced down at his small feline companion, who slumbered away against his chest, blissfully unaware of his jackrabbiting heartbeat threatening to burst out of his ribs. The silence seemed to permeate every inch of space and crush the air out of his lungs. He couldn't breathe.

Stanley’s steps grew faster, more frantic as the walls and ceilings seemed to close in on him. They grew smaller, tighter; squeezing, trapping. He hardly even registered his cat's complaints as she was jostled around in his grasp, breaking into a full out run. His breathing sounded loud, too loud, and the world was collapsing around him.

When he finally broke out into a large, open platform, he could finally breathe again. He had arrived at the tracks, the empty tunnel where the trains would pass an empty, gaping maw in the wall that seemed to swallow all light around it and beckon him closer. He felt his cat wriggle out from within his jacket and hop out with a displeasured yowl, scampering away and disappearing behind a corner much like the old man had. True silence pierced his ears and thrummed like a deafening pressure in his temples. He was alone.

Stanley was stuck in that subway station for years.

[artisiumstudios]

Stanley goes through extreme head trauma that causes him to either suffer extreme mental trauma and/or even cause him physical trauma. For example age regression or now being unable to speak properly (maybe unable to read) has to relearn how to do that, basically he has brain damage. Now this could go both ways.

(also TW for suicidal thoughts)

Either ford is called in and is told that his brother has been in an accident and when he gets there to the hospital he is told that Stan now requires full time supervision and needs to relearn how to talk, walk, basically everything, ford still wants to hold onto the grudges and be mad for the past. He tries to reinforce this by thinking "oh yeah of course now that im getting settled in now of all times he decides to be hurt. Now that im finally succeeding he has to barge into my life and make ME have to deal with the consequences of his actions." (he thinks while anxiety bubbles up in the pit of his stomach a voice in the back of his head praying that his brother is okay."

But the moment he sees Stan bandaged up, with tubes and wires wrapping around and inside him, keeping alive, all he feels is guilt, he’s scared. Stanley once so strong and lively now silently laying on a cold hard hospital as machines keep his body alive. Its a slow grueling process, first off having to relocate Stanley to Gravity Falls and then having to reteach him how to speak, motor skills, how to read, how to walk, how to live. Not to mention the mental trauma. The exhaustion for both twins, ford having to make time to go with stan to his physical and mental therapy appointments, and Stan having to actually go through with both of those. It only gets worse as Stan regains some of his memories both from his time from the street and the the worse one, the night at the gym leading to him getting kicked out.

he already felt like dead weight for having to rely on Ford all the time, but now with those memories his self hatred and guilt comes back to him full force and all he wishes is that he would've died upon impact. Maybe that way he'd finally stop being a burden.

Alternatively, ford doesn’t find out and Stan is left to relearn everything on his own (when his memory gets better he has some “sense” to ditch the hospital since he won’t be able to pay.) Unfortunately that means he now walks funny and is practically unable to run, his eyes become far too sensitive to light, he’s can't properly talk (he decides to just not say anything at all, after all what’s talking ever done to him but get him in more trouble) and mentally speaking he’s just worse off then before (mood swings, extreme anxiety, and paranoia).

When Ford calls for him it takes a bit longer for him to get there, and when he finally arrives, Ford is worse than in canon, much more irritable, tired, swaying on his feet. Not to mention he has foggy brain which makes it harder to pay attention to anything, to his brother.

Ford gets pissed thinking Stanley is drunk or high, the few words he has spoken are slurred, he’s wearing sunglasses inside the house for Moses sake! Not to mention that he’s literally tripping over himself and that he went from crying because of the crossbow (although Ford is a bit more sympathetic on that one, it would be weird not to panic at a weapon being pointed at you. But even then, t's odd his brother is crying-) to huffing and puffing like a child, to looking extremely fidgety and anxious in the last 40 minutes. Ford gets even more pissed when he tries to tell him about the portal only to find Stanley messing with something else.

He yells at him that he’s irresponsible to show up drunk and continue wasting his time, that he has shown to be untrustworthy once again. Stanley stays silent and unfortunately Ford can’t see the way tears swell in Stan’s eyes once more, he can’t say the way the glaze over as Stanley begins to dissociate. Ford lets Stanley stay the night, saying tomorrow he must leave. In the morning Ford finds Stanley whimpering in pain, his sunglasses are thrown across the room as his brother hit his palms over his head over and over again. Ford panics trying to understand what’s going on, he tries to pry Stan’s hands but he can’t seem to, his eyes are squeezed shut tears flowing down his cheeks.

Before he knows it Stan is dry heaving, Ford quickly finds a bucket and hands it over. When he asks Stan if he’s hungover Stan just stares at him weakly, his speech slurred he mutters the words bright and hurts. Ford catches on bring Stan’s sunglasses over. It takes moment, Stanley's shaky uncoordinated hands place the glasses over his eyes. He finally sighing in relief, his breathing more calm. Ford looks around the room spotting where sunlight creeps through the wood he hand hung earlier that week, the sun shines bright, the snow probably not helping. Ford looks at Stanley close noticing a jagged line that reaches from the bottom of his neck up to the back of his head, guilt creeps into his bones.

Without thinking he reaches out, brushing his hair tracing the line up til he reaches the lower part of his partial bone. Looking at Stanley once more, he notes the small scars that litter his face and hands, the way he seems uncoordinated, confused, unable to speak. Like he's-

Oh no.

[senipsenipsenip]

Once the Pines family realizes Stan’s memory lapses are just going to be a thing after Weirdmageddon, they buy him a flip phone.

The lapses don’t happen often, only every couple of months, moreso if Stan’s been stressed, but the family wants a way Stan can reach them if he’s alone or not at home when it happens. After all, they don’t want to smother him, and Stan doesn’t want the kids to feel like they have to be his caretaker when they should be enjoying their summers.

The wallpaper is a family picture, Stan, Ford, and the kids. The pinned contact is CALL THIS NUMBER ASAP. It goes to Ford’s phone. It used to say Ford’s name as well, but they realized quickly that if Stan thought Ford was in the portal he wouldn’t bother calling. It used to say CALL FOR HELP, but had to be changed after a lapse where Stan thought he was back in Colombia, and really didn’t want to risk it in case it was a police number. Stan suggested the ASAP. That way if he thought he was still on the streets, he’d probably assume he left that note himself because it was a “business partner” that he better contact before they “contacted” him. Ford was still haunted by the day he answered the phone and, before he could state his name, heard Stanley babbling excuses and promises about money and cargo and look you can’t off me yet please just another week

He was also a little haunted by whatever it meant when Stan called and, with more venom than he’d ever heard in his brother’s voice before, said “You’re the llama guy, aren’t you?”

But usually when Ford answers the phone, Stanley is surprised it’s him. Sometimes he’s angry, sometimes he’s frantic, but Stan always listens when Ford asks him to stay where he is and wait for him to pick him up. Ford always feels a mix of emotions, realizing how hurt Stanley had been in the past yet how he would always want to see Ford again. How often he would arrive at the diner or the grocery store or, on a bad day, the lake where Stan sat confused and lost in his old fishing boat, and give his brother the greeting he should have when he came out of the portal, when Stan arrived on his doorstep thirty years ago. He wraps his arms around his brother and says it’s okay. I’m glad you called. You did the right thing. I’m here.

And together they find their way back home.

[voidofthevoidmv]

Bill Cipher, except he genuinely CANT LIE.

Like, at all. Legitimately he is incapable of telling a lie.

Like sure, he can certainly dodge questions, or maybe create a loophole or two- But if you were to ask him a question directly with no way of avoiding it- HE HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO BE HONEST. And this fudges him over on multiple accounts.

And when he’s trying to dodge questions to avoid giving away his secrets or intentions- I want you to envision the scene from Shrek 3, where Pinocchio is being interrogated by Prince Charming concerning Shreks whereabouts- See here and he’s just RAMBLING-

Now, despite everything, this doesn’t change much. He still has flattery tactics and is careful with his worlds- Despite all his smarts Ford can still be blinded by his own hubris. So the whole portal thing goes down similarly to canon… Untill the portal incident happens.

With Ford stuck in the portal, Bill had no way of rebuilding it seeing that nobody would be willing… Aside from STANLEY PINES who is at a loss at what to do. The perfect willing assistant in rebuilding the portal. And bill wouldn’t have to lie that much cuz their goals really do aline somewhat… So, the demon tries to strike a deal…

This is when shit hits the fan for Bill.

And hey, let’s even go as far as to exaggerate the whole “Must return his half of the deal no matter what” portion of Bill’s deal making abilities. With this in mind, let’s take a look at EX CON STANLEY PINES who can sniff out a bad deal in no time- Due to his years of experience on the streets. And being the con artist that he is, Stanley being confronted by another con artist who can only tell the truth and also is confined to whatever deals they make… Well, this can only go well for him.

So Stanley tricks Bill- As he would in most dimensions if you get my gist. While Bill is offering unlimited knowledge in exchange for Stan’s compliance or something- Stan can easily twist Bills words against themselves and long story short- Bill is now trapped in Stanley’s debt and is confined to… Hmmm…

Let’s say he’s stuck constantly possessing a little magic 8 ball. And whoever shakes him, he’s forced to admit information to. A seriously bad deal on his part, an extremely great one on Stan’s part. So, Bill must help Stan get on with the portal without any sort of escape…

What’s even worse is that as time goes on, sometimes Stan even uses Bill as one of his ATTRACTIONS. (Honestly, Bill is lucky. Stan had been seconds away from binding the demon to a Zoltar machine-)

And time passes just as it would in canon, that is, untill the little pines twins come around to stay for the summer. And while I haven’t thought too hard about what the episodes looks like as I imagine it all doesn’t change too much- However. One thing that inspired this whole thing is how the kids are first introduced to bill- Something like:

Stan: Here kids- Meet Bill. This guy will answer all your pesky little questions.

Dipper: …Grunkle Stan, you named your magic 8 ball Bill?

Stan: Huh? Nah, he was called that when I first got him. Also Bill is just this all-knowing demon thing that I trapped inside of that ball in like… What was it- Was it- 85? Bah whatever-

Dipper: A demon…

Mable: *Eyes sparkling* Can I shake it???

Stan: *Tosses the ball casually* Sure knock yourself out kid.

Mable: Woahhhh…

Dipper: What is that thing… Is that… A triangle?

Stan: Welp. I’ll let you kids have at it- OH YEAH. He can’t lie so there’s that.

Or something like that. Haven’t worked out the kinks yet, but I think in this scenario Stan lets the kids mess around with Bill sometimes in hopes that the knowledge he possesses can help prevent the kids from like- Getting themselves in danger or something. And once the kids realize that they can just twist their words in order to make Bill slip and give helpful information- Well I can only imagine their shithead grins as Bill curses to the heavens. Dipper and Bill will banter a lot, with Bill obviously doing his best to break this pre-pubescent boys self esteem but it only assists in Dippers character development. Meanwhile, Bill and Mable can be lowkey chaotic and he could even respect her antics- If not for her whole “empathy and emotions” thing. (Perhaps a teensy bit of character development in places… But if Bill is a master of anything in any dimension, it is DENIAL-)

I think weirdmaggedon might still happen and there will be this whole rift thing and stuff- it’s still relatively similar. Maybe a different ending? Or another deal? Who knows. But this was just a silly thought I had- I can only imagine the names if I decide to invest time into it.

Magic 8 Bill AU? Or something? I might make some art for it if I’m being completely honest- Just a funny thought yk?

[almightyellie]

i'm not in love

in which angus always preferred being alone. at least, he used to.

pairing is angus tully x fem!reader

word count is 3.4k

author says don't look at me <3 not proofread bc it's me

you should watch out for college-aged angus, mostly just two besties who are so in love it makes them stupid

title song is i'm not in love // 10cc

angus tully answers his mother’s biweekly calls diligently. not because either of them truly want to speak to each other—it’s more perfunctory than anything. she calls and asks about school, and he tells her it’s good. then he asks about stanley, and she tells him about stanley’s job, and then she’ll ask angus about his job. he tells her it’s fine, and she offers him money that he’ll accept only if he’s in a particularly foul mood. after three years, they almost have it down to a perfect script. 

at least, he thought they did. 

“how’s y/n?”

the question catches him so off-guard that his sharp intake of breath makes him choke, but judy waits patiently for an answer. he mentioned you every once in a while. mostly, he likes that you’re an entirely separate part of his life from his mother and stanley. he’ll bring you up if she asks why he isn’t coming home on a holiday, or on the off-chance she asks about his weekend plans. yours is one of the only names he’s ever given her when he talks about school, and one of the only ones that seems to stick around longer than a few months at a time. “she’s…good,” he responds tentatively.

“what are you guys doing tonight?”

he stares at his phone in bemusement. “what is this?”

she sighs, and he can almost see that displeased look on her face. he had it memorized. “when are we going to meet her?”

“why do you want to meet her?” he asks. if he really thinks about it, it makes sense. you two had lived across from one another for three years, and you had fallen together in a way that almost felt predetermined. you are the longest standing person in his life post-high school, and his mother knows this.

he had always preferred being alone. even as a child, he had no interest in playing with the neighborhood kids in the middle of the street. he liked doing things by himself. he liked doing what he wanted without having to inform anyone else. when he had gone to college and found a semi-affordable apartment that he wouldn’t have to share, he had been elated. the cute girl across the hall had just been a plus. 

you two had always just worked. he holds everyone at arm's length, but it had never even occurred to him to shut you out. you two end up together most nights, watching movies or doing homework. it happens so easily that he hardly recognizes how strange it is. perpetual wallflower angus tully is attached.

“well, you two have been together for a while. if things are serious, i think it’s best that we meet her.”

angus blinks, shocked, before a nervous laugh bubbles up in his chest. it starts low, but the longer she waits in her own confused silence, the louder and more unruly his laughter becomes. he’s laughing—not because the idea is ridiculous, but because it’s so plausible that it takes him by surprise. he had spent the last two years trying to bury his feelings for you, and he had been so unsuccessful that even his mother had picked up on it.

“angus,” she snaps, and he giggles, even though it isn’t funny, even though his stomach twists and rolls in a way that makes him feel sick.

“i’m sorry,” he gasps, covering his eyes. “just…we—y/n and i aren’t together.”

there’s a long moment of silence where he catches his breath before his mom says, “angus, that’s not funny.”

“well, it is, if you think about it really hard,” he offers. she sighs, exasperated, and angus rubs his eyes. he can’t possibly explain to his mother what about this situation is truly amusing, because really, it isn’t funny. it’s not funny that he’s desperately in love with his best friend, and it’s not funny that she oscillates between entirely oblivious and seemingly aware. 

“you’re telling me you’ve been missing family holidays for a girl you aren’t dating?” 

he can tell she doesn’t believe him, and he doesn’t bother reminding her that they haven’t had a real family holiday in years. long before he started university, and long before he met you. besides, answering that question honestly is dangerous, and should he not handle this delicately, he’ll find himself on the wrong side of his mother’s wrath.

“uh…”

he’s fumbling, panicking, and it only gets worse when he hears his front door open. “angus?” you call, and his whole body cringes, his head falling to rest on the wall.

“angus,” judy warns.

“yeah,” he blurts, watching you round the corner. you smile, offering only a small wave as you drop your bag onto his kitchen table. “no, mom, obviously not. that would be ridiculous.”

as he feels her anxiety cease, his own skyrockets. he’s focused entirely on you; your back is turned toward him as you open his fridge, searching through the shelves for something to eat. if it were anyone else, he’d be irritated, but he almost loves it when you do it. loves that you feel comfortable enough in his home to make yourself feel at home, that he can take care of you in the smallest way. most nights, when he lies in bed and thinks of you, he finds himself thinking of the ways he could take care of you. the ways he could give you what he never had, the things that had been ripped from him. security. unconditional affection. peace. he’s barely listening when his mother sighs again. “you know, i don’t understand your humor sometimes.”

“i know,” he says. you kick the fridge closed, enough food in your hands to feed both of you. “hey, she actually just got here. can i let you go?”

“not until you answer my question.” her voice is clipped now, and angus winces. some nights she’s a little more forgiving with his distraction, a little more responsive to the things he says that she doesn’t necessarily understand. tonight, he’s more distracted than usual and less decipherable than ever. “when can we meet her?”

angus groans, and you smile over your shoulder. you know better than anyone how much he struggles with his mother. you’ve listened in on many of their phone calls, and patiently listened to him complain about them later. “i don’t know, mom.”

“how about easter?” she asks. angus turns to lean against the wall and watch you, and you lean against the counter, waiting for him to be done. he rolls his eyes, a silent cue that things are taking longer than he’d like. “stanley and i can drive up that saturday and take you guys out for a nice dinner. on us.”

reluctantly, only because he knows that she’ll blow a gasket if they don’t nail down plans on this phone call, and because he wants this to be over, he huffs. he pulls the receiver away slightly and asks, “you want to have dinner with my mom and stanley easter weekend?”

you blink owlishly. “what? why?”

“they want to meet you.”

“why?” you insist. he glares at you impatiently; knowing angus—more, knowing what you know about his mother—an answer is needed now, and explanation must come later. the idea of meeting his mom makes your stomach turn uncomfortably, but there he stands. even with a hard glare, you feel safe with him. you feel the need to do what he asks of you, and you know him well enough to know that he wouldn’t ask if he thought it would be something you couldn’t handle. “uh…i guess, yeah.”

he offers a grateful smile. “easter weekend sounds great, mom.”

they quickly finalize plans before hanging up, and the second the receiver is back on hook, he groans loudly, rubbing his eyes. you wait for him to speak, but he stands with his hands over his eyes, hiding from you. “angus.”

“she thinks you’re my girlfriend,” he blurts.

you really don’t mean to start laughing. “what?”

his lips turn up in a sheepish smile. “i guess they’ve thought we were together this entire time,” he chuckles. “and i panicked! she accused me missing holidays to spend time with you and i didn’t want to get in trouble—”

you clutch your stomach, doubled over in laughter. he doesn’t want to laugh—frankly, he’s a little hurt that you find the idea so laughable, but he had laughed, too. “you caved,” you gasp. “you caved and told a lie because you didn’t want to get in trouble with your mommy.”

“okay.” he rolls his eyes. “whatever. you’re part of this now, too.”

your giggles die down and you turn to take the food out of the microwave. “hey, i could back out. i could break up with you at any time.”

he scoffs, but doesn’t respond. often enough, when you’re doing exactly what you’re doing now, angus’ feelings become overwhelming. watching you move around his kitchen with the kind of natural domesticity makes him feel choked, buried under his overflowing affection.

the harder he fights his feelings, the worse they get. you’re his best friend—it’s not on purpose, either; you aren’t at all the kind of person he ever thought he would fall for. you were bitingly funny, of course, but you fought him constantly. he wouldn’t even say you were particularly nice for the first few months you two knew one another. you’re entirely out of left field, and he can’t even get a read on you half the time—not that he even really wants to. part of him thinks that knowing exactly what you think about him would be truly crushing.

“i guess a free meal could be nice,” you tease, stirring your dinner with a knowing smile.

“yeah, you’re so unused to those,” he bites, pushing himself off the wall. you beam.

it’s surprising, in a way, that you hadn’t met angus’ mom and stepfather already. he’s met your family a thousand times over; they take you both out to dinner every single time they visit you. they had sent him a birthday gift this year, for christ’s sake. but you could probably count the amount of time angus had seen his mother in the last three years on both hands. you were surprised enough that she even remembered your name.

you had spent your entire friendship with angus thinking about his mother. being angry with her. your best friend is caring, in his own stilted, modest way. he’s witty and so smart that it intimidates you, and he’s loyal. it tells you all you need to know that his relationship with his mother isn’t strong. 

he bumps you out of the way, and you let him. you watch him open the cupboard for plates to evenly split the leftover pasta, and your chest nearly heaves with confused affection. you see the way he looks at you when he’s not careful. with an unrestrained reverence, with a tenderness that can’t be forced. it had made you uncomfortable, at first. made you feel like you couldn’t be around him anymore. you had tried to pull away—for a day or two. 

the reality of the entire situation is that angus tully belongs in your life. you adore him too much to cut him out, and even if you didn’t, it kills you to think of him alone. he’s a lone wolf; it’s amazing enough that you two have connected the way that you have. if angus didn’t have you, he had a few friends from class. maybe two or three guys from work. but nothing as deep, nothing as serendipitous as your friendship. 

discomfort with his feelings had grown into a tentative acceptance once you realized he had no plans on acting on them, and after a few months, tentative acceptance had grown into…something else entirely. you aren’t sure exactly what it is. it isn’t like those juvenile, giddy crushes you had harbored in high school. angus doesn’t keep you up at night, nor does he make you lovesick. he puts you at ease. he makes you feel safe. he makes you feel like yourself.

you don’t want to confront the strange sense of peace that angus has offered you without even knowing. without even trying. you don’t want to change your friendship, or misattribute your feelings, so you ignore them. and you ignore the way he looks at you, and how he insists on making your favorite dinners, even though he complains about you eating his leftovers, and how he uses your spare key to lock your door every single time he leaves your apartment without fail. 

your knees bump together under the tiny table in his kitchen as you two eat dinner. you listen to him talk about his coworkers, lulled into relaxation by his deep voice; you always loved your dinnertime conversations. mostly, one of you just talked. you would talk about school and work and your classmates and your days; they aren’t even really conversations. it’s just an excuse to talk and an opportunity to listen. he doesn’t mind when you don’t respond, and neither of you care if the other person talks the entire time. it’s time spent together more than anything else. you think about how effortless it feels. how you could do this every night with intention, not under the guise of getting out of your apartment. you think about the dinner with his mom, and how you’ll both put on nice outfits to go out, and how you’ll come home together, and how you’ll dissect every detail of the dinner and the conversations for the entire night, if not for days afterwards.

you notice only a moment too late that you’ve zoned out, and angus kicks your shin gently. “you good?”

with a reassuring smile, you nod. “yeah. i’m just thinking about dinner with your mom.”

he’s bashful when he laughs quietly. “yeah…sorry. i know i kind of screwed you over.” you can tell that he truly does feel bad, but the longer you think about it, the less you dread it. you think you might actually like an excuse to acknowledge the way angus looks at you, for him to not have to hide it. 

“i don’t know…i’m kind of excited,” you admit, pushing food around your plate. angus looks at you from under his lashes, taking pause at your tone. you refuse to look at him, and it sends his heart into overdrive; he’s panicked, certainly, and so in love with you that it makes him nauseous. he isn’t entirely sure that he’ll survive a night of you pretending. of it all feeling so real.

he can feel a confession coming, bubbling up in his chest, and he swallows in panic. “she’s—she’ll like you, i think.”

with a slight smile, you push your plate away from you. “i’m not sure i’ll like her.”

which he loves about you, naturally. 

he clears his throat to bury the confession and stands; angus grabs both plates and turns his back to you to hide his flushed cheeks. shamelessly, since he can’t see you, you watch him, soothed simply by the way he moves. by how familiar he is. by how you can almost predict every move he makes. the words fall out before you’re even cognizant of them

“just so you know, i don’t mind your mom thinking i’m your girlfriend.”

the way he freezes makes your shoulders tense. you hadn’t meant to say that. it was true, but he didn’t need to know that. angus’ mind screeches to a full stop before it starts running ten times faster than before. what did that mean?

slowly—so slowly that you almost don’t notice—he sets the plates in the sink. you won’t get out of this. you know you won’t, because you know angus. once the door is open, he’ll take the opportunity to push it every single time. “why?” he asks, his voice a carefully constructed tone of ease. he plays it well; his nonchalance is almost perfectly natural. it nearly tricks you.

still kicking yourself, you shrug even though he can’t see you. instead, you start emptying your bag to distract yourself. textbooks and notebooks and pencils clatter against the table. “just…we could sell it, don’t you think?” it’s not even close to what he wants to hear, and you buckle down even though you know you won’t win this one. “we know everything about each other.”

he snorts, and it puts you at ease. not because you’re going to get out of this. you know something dangerous is going to come out of this conversation, but because it’s angus. it’s your best friend. and you know him, and you know the way he treats you is symptomatic of something much larger. it used to scare you, but it doesn’t now. not now that he washes your dishes, the sleeves of his sweater pushed up to his elbows. you trust him. you know that any vulnerability you share will be returned to you tenfold.

“yeah, right. that just makes it convenient,” he says knowingly, head tilting. he watches you sort through your textbooks, hiding your anxiety while you busy yourself.

part of you hopes that he’ll just drop it. not because you don’t think things will work out, but because you love how things are between the two of you. the almosts, the what-ifs, the wondering is something you so love to savor. it’s still so easy between you two; all of those what-ifs still exist only in your minds, only in the silent space between you that neither of you are willing to acknowledge. there’s plausible deniability. there’s safety.

you smile shakily, glancing up at him. “i guess i mean…that we…work?”

he smiles back, comforting but still audacious. “and by that, you mean…”

with a groan, you fold your arms and bury your face in them. you know this leap can only be beneficial, but you’re struggling to let yourself admit anything. it’s more frustrating than the denial. 

angus stares at you, suddenly the emotionally constipated one, and his heart is pounding in his ears. he can feel it beating against his chest; he’s not brave enough to hope. it’s too scary for him to wonder if this is finally it, if you had been as keenly aware as he had assumed you to be. 

“just…i think there’s a reason my mom thinks we’re together. just so you know.” you groan louder, unmoved by his words, and he continues, “beyond the fact that we’re constantly together.”

you peek up at him, your chin still pressed against your forearms. he watches you, big brown eyes wide open with vulnerability. he’s waiting. you figure it’s as good of a segue as he’s going to give you. with a deep breath, ignoring the turning and rolling of your stomach, you say, “i feel like…things could be like that between us.”

he breaks into a smile so wide that you have to look away from him. “oh, is that what this is about?” he asks facetiously. 

you grunt, irritated. “don’t tease me.”

he laughs, uncrossing his arms. you don’t even want to look at him, humiliated. he hasn’t rejected you—in fact, you know he’s just keeping you on the line to tease you. it irritates you, but he seems giddy, even if he tries to act like he’s unaffected. he can’t keep that goofy smile off his face. it entirely gives him away. “hey,” he says, voice bright. “c’mere.”

“no,” you spit, annoyed. you know that the second you give in, everything will change. for the better, you think, but it will change. you hold on to the wondering for just a moment longer, but you can’t help yourself. he waits patiently at the counter, holding on to the ledge. you like the wondering, but you think you’re ready to find out if it’s as good as it seems it would be.

self-conscious, you cross the room to him. you stand only centimeters apart, and he grins at you, fingers gently stroking the hem of your collar. “you know, right?”

you don’t have to ask what he means. you know. maybe not the depths, but you know. the way he looks at you is enough to let you know. the way he takes care of you tells you what his words haven’t yet. they will. “you can’t hide from me, angus tully.”

he loves that about you, too. he’ll tell you all the specifics later. for now, he kisses you, a long arm around your waist, and you think that this is much better than the what-ifs.

[sunsetchicane]

i love you, i'm sorry [QH43]

quinn hughes x fem!reader

word count: 2.9k

summary: two years after breaking things off with Quinn, you find yourself going to Game 1 of Round 2 of the Playoffs, completely unprepared to see the man you still harbour feelings for.

based off of: this is loosely based off of I Love You, I'm Sorry by Gracie Abrams

warnings: aggressive amounts of pining (like, probably annoying), two swear words, a few kisses, mentions of a breakup (so like, kinda angst? idk man), copious amounts of cheesiness, probably extremely inaccurate descriptions of the game, not great writing lol. let me know if i missed anything!

author's note: okay, i haven't written anything on here yet due to a horrendous case of writer's block and many hours of working. so, this is definitely not my best work, but it was a fun way to try move past my writing slump. i really do hope that anyone who reads this does enjoy! love, addi <3

Vancouver’s streets preserve memories well. You found that out when, even two years after things had fallen to pieces, you couldn’t go anywhere without seeing the two of you holding hands, sharing quiet laughs, and stealing kisses. You’d thought that after two years you would’ve been able to shake those memories off when they plagued your mind; but it was hard when he was plastered across banners and fans sported his jersey for half the year. 

He was making his name known throughout the NHL, and you couldn’t ignore the buzz around Quinn Hughes when the Canucks made it to the Stanley Cup Playoffs. 

After you and Quinn had broken things off, you had to find separate friend groups to belong in. The two of you had shared too many mutual friends. The group of ladies you did manage to find yourself among knew nothing about your past relationship with the captain of the Canucks. When the city was gearing up for the first round of the playoffs, even your friends couldn’t stop talking about the sport. 

You were standing outside, leaning against the railing on a BC ferry, returning from visiting family on the Island, when you received a call from your friend Lydia. You picked up without hesitation. 

“Hey, what’s up?” you asked. 

She immediately giggled, which honestly had you a little scared. “I have a surprise,” she said excitedly, the last word dragged out. 

You snorted. “Am I allowed to ask what it is?” 

“It’s a really big surprise, and you have to promise not to scream when I tell you,” she laughed, acting like a teenage girl again. It was one of the things you really did love about her – her ability to bring childlike joy with her wherever she went. 

“I promise not to scream, Lyd,” you assured her, hoping she was satisfied. 

She paused for dramatic effect, and you let her. You knew she was having fun with it. 

“We’re going to the first game of round 2 of the playoffs!” she squealed. 

Your phone nearly slipped through your fingers, almost lost to the sea. You stepped away from the railing, suddenly very glad there was no one on the deck with you. Your heart clenched in your chest. The last time you had been to a game was when you and Quinn had still been together. He wouldn’t even know you were in the crowd, but you would be painfully aware of him in the centre of the arena. 

“Okay, you’re even quieter than I thought you’d be,” Lydia commented, reminding you that there was someone on the other end of the line. 

You debated for a moment what to say. Would it best to just blurt out that you had dated Quinn Hughes and you were not exactly ready to go watch him play again? Definitely not. 

“Uh, yeah, I’m just surprised!” That wasn’t a lie. “How’d you get the tickets?” 

“My dad,” she said simply. “When I told him I wanted to go see the Canucks, he was suddenly the proudest parent in the world. You know how he is – once he gets an idea in his head, whether it’s planted there by me or not, he has to do it.” 

“Wow, that’s–that’s crazy!” you said stiffly, still unsure of how to act. 

“Yeah, and it gets better! We’re sitting right behind the Canucks’ bench!” 

You nearly choked on nothing. “What?” 

“I know, right? I don’t know how my dad managed it, but he did,” she told you, completely unaware of your stuttering heart. “Who knows, maybe we’ll catch some players’ eyes,” she joked, and you tried to force a laugh out with her. 

“Yeah, maybe.” What you didn’t add out loud was your brain screaming please no. 

After a few more minutes of chatting and you pretending to be completely sound of mind, Lydia said goodbye, telling you she would send the details soon. 

You pocketed your phone and leaned against the railing once more. You watched as the sun brushed the horizon, casting a beautiful pink against the clouds. Vancouver was getting close, and for obvious reasons, you were suddenly dreading it. You wanted to sit on the ferry until it returned to Vancouver Island. 

You sighed and rested your chin on your folded arms. You heard a faint buzzing sound above you, and lifted your eyes to the sky. A plane was coming to land at the Vancouver Airport. As it approached, you let yourself imagine it was Quinn flying back from Nashville, and you felt your heart tighten in your chest once more, because you were terrified to see him again, but also because you still missed him. Maybe you were scared to see him because you missed him. 

You dropped your forehead to your arms once more and groaned loudly, the ocean and the brightening city lights your only listening companions. 

When the morning of May 8th arrived, you found yourself unable to shake the anxiety that had made a home in your chest over the last few days. There was a tenseness in your shoulders that never left, and a squeezing at your heart that seemed relentless. 

The group chat you shared with your friends had been buzzing incessantly, the girls incredibly excited. Every now and then you made your fingers put a message out there that hopefully hid your anxieties from them. 

After much procrastination, you eventually made your way to your closet. After tugging on a simple pair of blue jeans, you reached towards the back of your closet. Your fingers closed around the unmistakable, thick material of the jersey. Taking a deep breath, you pulled it out. Your only Canucks jersey of course, had to be Quinn’s home jersey from two seasons ago. No one would know it was the jersey that he had pulled over his head before every home game. However, you knew. There was no C on the left side of the chest, and your mind was pulled back to the relationship you had shared.  

You often questioned why you and Quinn had even ended things. You missed him so much still, and you were plagued by the way you knew it had been the wrong choice. You had been growing apart as he was dealing with growing attention and expectations within his career, and a promotion at your own job had stolen your energy and attention. You had both been tired and short with one another, and eventually the tension built and had blown up in a terrible way. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to force both the guilt and continued yearning out of your busy mind. 

When Lydia texted that she and the girls were on the way to your apartment, you reluctantly pulled the jersey over your head. The sleeves covered most of your hands, and the fabric fell past your hips and part way down your thighs. You pulled on a pair of shoes and left the safe space that was your apartment, locking the door behind you. 

Rogers Arena was packed and the energy in the building made you feel like you could start vibrating. You and your friends held hands so as not to get separated. You were glad when your friends made no comment on how tightly you squeezed their hands, or how sweaty your palms might have been. 

You were made significantly more nervous when you realised that Lydia had not been exaggerating about your seats. You were sitting right behind the bench. 

The arena was filling up steadily, and you sat there in between your friends, not speaking a single word. It had been a couple years since you had been here, and while you were very nervous, the familiarity came rushing back to you and it helped to slow your fast beating heart. 

If you closed your eyes, you could imagine Quinn smiling at you from the other side of the glass, and laughing when you blew him a kiss. 

You wrapped your arms gently around yourself, the once very stiff material of the jersey now very easily shifted and manipulated. You knew it didn’t smell like him anymore, but when you let yourself get lost in the feeling of his old jersey, it was like he was right there. You were wrapped in him still, and you doubted it would ever go away. 

You were shocked out of your own thoughts when your friends, along with the rest of the fans around you, started cheering. The Canucks and the Oilers were on the ice, starting to warm up. Your eyes searched the ice quickly, and gliding easily across the ice on the opposite side of rink, was the captain, the number 43 embroidered on his jersey, just like the one you adorned. 

Your own cheeks heated up when it really hit you that you were wearing his old jersey. You weren’t together anymore; what were you thinking? He could see you– what would he think when he saw you right behind his bench, wearing the jersey he had gifted you?

You suddenly wanted to throw up more than ever. He exchanged a few words with Elias, and laughed at something his buddy had said. Your heart ached in longing once more. You had missed his laugh so much. 

Quinn now had facial hair, something he hadn’t had when he was with you. His hair was longer, peeking out from beneath his helmet. He already seemed much more grown up. He looked like a captain, something who had become used to leading his team. Quinn had always been somewhat confident in his abilities as a hockey player, but it was easy to tell that he had really gotten used to his role on the team and had come into his own over the past two years. 

The girls grabbed your hands and walked into the aisle, just to get right up to the glass. Your face burned and you tried to hide behind some of your friends. You kept your heads down and your arms folded. 

Your friends held up hats and other paraphernalia that they desperately wanted signed by players. 

“Y/N!” One of your friends practically shouted. You suddenly noticed that they had all stopped cheering. You looked up to see them parted in front of you. 

Quinn was on the other side of the glass, looking right at you. 

Your friends shoved you up the glass, giggling and squealing. You nearly ran into the glass from the force of their shoves. Quinn laughed at you, his smile exactly how you remembered it. 

He pointed at the white Canucks towel in your hands and shouted, “toss it over!” The arena was so loud you were glad he had mouthed it clearly. You hesitated but threw the towel over. With one glove off and in the other hand, he caught it. He gestured to one of your friends to throw over the Sharpie she was holding. She did gladly, happy to be included. He caught it easily and started to write quickly on the white fabric. Your heart did flips while watching him, and your hands shook with nothing to hold onto. 

He finally capped the pen and threw both the towel and marker over the glass. You struggled to catch it, but thankfully, you managed to hold onto it. You held it flat before you. 

Meet me by my car after. Usual spot. Your breath stopped slightly when you saw a rushed heart drawn next to the words. You looked back up to see him putting his glove back on. He gave you a warm smile that set you on a fire from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. You took a deep breath and nodded to him. His smile widened slightly. Before he turned to skate away, you saw him mouth the words, “nice jersey.” You stuttered for a second, and he simply winked and turned. 

Your friends all screamed and crowded you, looking at the towel. 

“Usual spot? What the fuck is going on?” Lydia yelled over the noise, cackling. 

You just blushed and shook your head, returning to your seat with the towel gripped tightly in your hands. 

As the teams continued to warm up, you explained as quickly as you could that you and Quinn had once been together. Your friends, of course, were shocked but also very excited for you at the prospect of reuniting with him. You simply waved your hands in protest. 

“I don’t even know if he wants to get back together with me! He might just want to catch up or something… we’re cool now and I don’t want to mess anything up.” 

“Girl, please!” one of your friends shouted. “He drew a motherfucking heart and winked at you! Of course he wants you back.”

You all laughed and you embraced the next blush that warmed your cheeks. 

The players left the ice, and minutes later, the lights went dark. The deafening sound of nearly 19,000 people screaming almost broke your eardrums. Blue light filled the room, and you looked up to see what was playing on the large screens above you. 

You watched the intro video and let a nostalgic, giddy feeling overtake you. You couldn’t help but smile. 

The arena fell back into nearly full darkness. You heard the beginning of a familiar sound of twinkly guitar that dragged you right back to 2011. Goosebumps rose up along your skin all over your body. That was the last time the Canucks had made it to the Playoff finals, and you hoped dearly that they could get there again. The playing of Where The Streets Have No Name from their intro from 2011 made hope take hold of you.

You couldn’t help but raise your particularly special white rally towel in the air to wave alongside all of the other Canucks fans in the building. 

It had been surprisingly easy to get into the players’ parking garage. Despite it being two years since you had been in the building, you were recognized by several people, who let you walk wherever you wanted. 

Your friends had practically shoved you to go after the game, screaming after you to call them later. You had laughed and walked away, your steps lighter than they had been in a long while. 

You later found yourself standing by Quinn’s car. It was the same one he’d had when you had been together. Your hand brushed the shining hood of the car, and you could see yourself in the passenger seat, laughing at something he’d said as the two of you drove around downtown Vancouver. 

“Thank God you actually showed up.” 

You whipped around, seeing a freshly showered Quinn in sweatpants and a hoodie making his way towards you. 

You tugged on the hem of the jersey, your heart beating quicker and quicker with every step he took. 

He stopped in front of you, and when you looked up, you both spoke. 

“I love you.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

Your eyes nearly popped out of your head. “You-what?” 

He bit his bottom lip before repeating himself. “I love you. I know it’s been two years, but-” 

“I love you, too,” you said quickly, blood roaring in your ears. “And I am so, so sorry. I never should’ve-” 

It was his turn to cut you off. “Don’t apologise, please. It’s not your fault.”

“Can you… can you please accept my apology, at least?” 

He smiled softly. “I forgive you. I’m sorry, too.” 

“I forgive you, too,” you whispered softly, your heart swelling with affection as you looked at him. You felt an intense relief flood your body. Your shoulders finally relaxed for the first time in what felt like years. He reached out and wrapped you in a warm hug. You melted into it, returning the gesture. 

“I missed you. So much,” you mumbled into his hoodie. 

One of hands gently scratched the back of your neck like he used to do. “I missed you, too.” He pulled away just enough to lean down and kiss your lips softly. Nothing had ever felt so natural. His playoff beard scratched your face and you laughed at the sensation, pulling away. 

“Not used to the beard,” you admitted, smiling widely. 

He smiled, too. “Yeah, what do you think? Should I keep it around?” 

You shrugged, leaning back into him. “Well, you’re very handsome either way.” 

“You think?” 

“Mhm. Your hair also looks very good. I like it longer like this,” you told him, ruffling his brown hair. He swatted your hand away and kissed your cheek. 

“Noted.” He looked down at me again. “Should probably get you a new jersey.” 

“Hm, you think I need the big ole C on here, Captain?” 

He shook his head, blushing. “Don’t call me that.” 

You laughed, wrapping your arms around him, bringing his head down for you to kiss. “Couldn’t help myself.” You grabbed his hands. “Congratulations on the big win, by the way.” 

“I can’t believe you came. I thought I was hallucinating or something when I saw you,” he told you honestly. 

“Well, I’m glad I came,” you admitted, running a hand through his hair. 

“You have no idea how happy I am right now,” he said, smiling wider than you had seen all night. 

You laughed, feeling pure joy in your heart. “I think I might have an idea.” 

[babyblankyerror]

I like to think Stanley has photographic memory (is that what it's called?)

Like he's able to look at one thing and remember it to detail- if you ask him to describe someone he will give you full details that you wouldn't even consider because it's things he noticed..

He's especially food with faces which wouldn't be nice for a little kid- he'd remember each of his father's micro expressions and hold onto those. He'd remember vividly the way teachers looked at him and the things people said about him TO DETAIL. The day he listens in to the conversation of how he will be scraping off barnacles? The night he was kicked out?? He remembers EXACTLY how everything lookes and sounded..

Someone finds this out and Stanley becomes useful in the streets. He is asked what he saw in a certain place and he will describe it, he will remember and even draw a blueprint if you ask him- Some goons can ask him which way is safer and he'll just be like "well, if you went right here you'd be in the clear but up ahead it's more dangerous. Here, however, the guard looked shifty- big pupils and all. Definitely high- you'd be safer through there-" and so on.

I don't know :3 I just think it'd be fun if the guy with the best memory is the same guy that loses it (which would explain why he remembered right after too)

[the-maid-of-witchwood]

Finally, I dare you to gimme your Grace headcanons (gotta round out the trio)

Yes!

First of all a quick apology - sorry, Grace, we should have done you first as the eldest.

Full name is Grace Marian Chasity and I will die on this hill

She was born in Scotland

(Extended family is British)

They visit once a year over Thanksgiving break because the Chasities don’t celebrate non-religious holidays

Her first eight words were all colours, starting with purple because her mother wears it a lot, until she met baby Steph and picked up “Effanie”

Was a very quiet and non-fussy baby so her parents took her to church real early

Lucy also took her birdwatching at this age because nobody else would go with her - it’s also where Grace gets her passion for birds (nighthawks) welfare from

Was really late learning to walk

Learnt to walk because her father dropped a book on the floor once and she instinctively went to put it on the shelf. Mark got into the habit of just throwing books (lightly) across the room to have Grace fetch them

There’s so many home videos of her stopping what she was doing, retrieving the books and telling her dad off for making a mess, sending him to prayer to apologise to God

Grace and Richie have been kinda friends since elementary

She was shorter than Ruth for first grade and then kinda grew a little taller in second grade

As a child, she had a pet hamster called Prudence

She plays the flute and is in the school orchestra, there’s only two flutes (the other is PJ)

Loves history, especially stuff on royalty

Her favourite historical period is the renaissance

Reads a lot of historical non-fiction

Ruth eventually gets her into Six the Musical and then got really concerned after Grace casually described Samantha Pauly’s version of All You Wanna Do as relatable

This only becomes more worrying when Grace offhandedly mentions relating to Becky because of Stanley

(Both Max and Gabe are really creepy and weird with her, we need to acknowledge it more)

She is a huge Shakespeare nerd, like will give Angela a run for her money

Trevor is meant to be a Hall Monitor with her but he chickens out of actually telling anyone off, so Grace has to pick up his slack

Grace is part of her church’s Nativity every year, she’s always an angel. Not Gabriel, Gabe always gets that part, just a random angel. Rose always got Mary, when she was still there

Her memory is really good, she remembers the smallest of things

Takes pride in being one of the eldest in the class and has always used that to make up for her lack of height

She helps out in the school shows as line prompt and is definitely humming along in the wings

Caitlyn has a bit of a crush on her and lowkey jealous of other people getting close to her

Literally the only person who likes Harmony Jones (Greenpeace girl), definitely her first crush

After going to Beanie’s with the group, she may or may not have been caught blushing at Zoey too

She can draw fairly well, but only really likes doing landscape and buildings - her portfolio is just made up of churches and castles

She wants to learn how to dance but, beyond the Scottish country dancing she’s picked up at family weddings, she has no idea what she’s doing

Has never broken a bone and is disgusted by the thought

Doesn’t like the idea of being behind the wheel, so hasn’t learnt to drive. Had one unofficial lesson with Steph and freaked out

Gets travel sick very easily

Gets really heavy periods and painful cramps, has been to the doctor - there’s nothing wrong so they just suggested taking birth control to not have her periods which Grace and her parents refused

(And maybe she regrets it once a month)

PANSEXUAL

Somewhere on the aroace spectrum too but hasn’t worked it out yet

The eldest of the group and certified mom-friend

Will hold their hands when crossing the street

In spite of their links to witchcraft and Satanism, Grace really wants a pet cat

Yes, the eldest thing is mentioned multiple times; it’s what Grace would want.

I’ve already done all of Grace’s ship headcanons at this point (Lautity, Spankity/Bible Study and Lautskity), so just for fun…

Holystage, Bible Passion, Halohat or whatever else we can come up with (Caitlyn x Grace):

Definitely were set up by Trevor with some help from Ruth

(Not fully though because Ruth hates Caitlyn)

Caitlyn is the only other child in Grace’s neighbourhood

Caitlyn blows her kisses from the stage

Caitlyn encourages Grace to try on her costumes and they have a lot of photos of them messing around in the dressing room (featuring Josephine + the boys when they sneak in)

Their friend groups kinda mostly hate each other (playfully) but put up with each other for their sake

Grace always buys Caitlyn red roses (Cait’s favourite flower) for her shows, including dress rehearsals

Caitlyn returns the favour by showing up with flowers (Grace doesn’t have a particular favourite, but it’s usually carnations) after Grace’s orchestral performances

They make music together

Caitlyn can play a shit ton of instruments, but is currently teaching Grace how to play the piano

Grace runs lines with Caitlyn and, in spite of her limited knowledge in acting being Shakespeare, helps her improve her performance

Miss Mulberry loves them

Grace also brings baked goods for Caitlyn to share with her costars and crew in rehearsals

The cottagecore girlfriends of all time

Grace has a type and it’s just Mariah.

[noodles-doodles01]

Some Gravity Falls Stuff I Found

A lot of this could already be known, but I'm having fun and its a way to keep track. All is from thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com

So for computer passwords:

Dipper- a letter from Bill (his handwriting + he calls him Pine Tree) telling dipper to stare into the sun

Mabel- Places stickers all over the lab until the screen says "lab fully Mabelized"

Stanford/Sixer- Gives a Medical report on Ford's hand taken at 18, the report censors the mention of kidnapping him for cloning

Stanley- eBay for brass knuckles

MatPat- a video of MatPat saying "hello internet, this time, you're on your own"

Cipher/Bill Cipher- Eye of Providence Wiki

Bill- Sesame Street Video

Wendy- A letter from Wendy saying that she wrote a way to ward off evil triangles at the bottom right of the book (I have two ideas for what this could be), also a 👌 drawn in the bottom right corner upside down.

Blind Eye- A seeing eye test that repeats the letters WKHBOOVHH (anagram maybe?) with a colour code at the bottom (I'll include this later in this post)

Robbie- Shows messenger messages between Robbie and Thompson. Thompson seems to be getting real tired of the bullying (He wrote out "If you keep insulting me one of these days I-" and then highlights it as if he's about to delete it, followed by Yea :(). They discuss going to a site to see Bill, and later freak out about seeing him and knowing how they both die (Thompson gets mistaken for luggage and Robbie chokes on a mini skateboard). The end is this photo with Bill in the background:

Pacifica- A letter from Pacifica herself warning against Bill, saying that she dumped old Tapestries with triangles on it off a yacht with an unnamed friend. She seems to be super uncomfy about mentioning who the friend is (Dipper maybe?). She ends the letter saying that you should follow her on Platinum Paz

Platinum Paz: Details a story of Pacifica having a nightmare about blood being on her hands and everywhere. She then has a conversation with a statue of Nathaniel NW, who asks about her anger. She tells him everything was better before the Pines' came to town, and he says he will help her if she does something for him: go to the Pines' place and grab a small snowglobe that's new (the rift). He is about to shake her hand before she stops and wakes up. She then adds Dipper's number to her phone and sleeps well. Most likely what leads to the tapestries being thrown off a yacht.

Oneeyedking: a hypnosis tape where there is morse code in the background while Bill says "you want to sell your soul to Bill Cipher" three times. I didn't do this but the morse code gives a series of letters (explained below)

If you spam Stanley: you are a taken to something called “the Wheel of Shame” and it is Bill explaining that he knows all of Stan’s shames since he was in his head. They are listed as follows: Ex Wives, Fears, Secret Shames, Unreported Crimes, Stan’s Failed Products, Lowest Moments, Darkest Thought (pin all crimes on Soos), and How Stan Beat Me (He didn’t! I’M STILL HERE SUCKER)

Now for Codes:

When you click on the book of Bill, there is a letter from Ford to Dipper warning against the book. On the last page at the bottom right corner, this code is seen (this is what I thought Wendy might mean):

I tried all the existing codexes, but they didn't work. Until I typed MASON into the compuer (Dipper's acc name), which gives a sheet where Dipper talks about learning how to make codes. Ford's writing comes in at the end, and the words CRYPTOGRAM CODEX are capitalized at the end. When that was input into the computer, a folder file was downloaded and gave me multiple codes.

I used CypherFontA and flipped the message on the Vertical Axis and reversed the message to get: PER ASPERA AD ASTRA, which means "through suffering to the stars" in Latin

There is another hidden code on the candle, visible through the lightning, and it uses the Runes codex, translating to CURSED. When input into the computer, you get this "Just Say No" campaign poster against drawing triangles (RAD), the words Cool and Parties are both randomly capitalized in this speech bubble from Nancy Reagan (not applicable to the passwords tho)

Carved into the wall (visible when lightling strikes) on the left is the Latin phrase "VALLIS CINERIS", which translates to "valley of ashes", you get this image and a creepy voice that says "why did you do it?" (a reference to bill destroying his home dimension)

The morse code spells out NAITSUAF, and when input to the computer, gives an offer to sell your soul. At the bottom is a button that asks are you ready, when you click on it, it shows a contract that has the following code on it

This is also a codex given in the previously mentioned codex file, and it is the theraprism file. It states: "YOU ARE NOW TWENTY ONE GRAMS LIGHTER"

Below the theraprism is more CipherFontA code, which I have not fully completed but seems to list out the terms of the contract. However, I noticed these rectangles near the words and am wondering if it means to take the letter closest to it or if it is a period. I am too lazy to work it all out rn so feel free to lmk what that all says :)

When you sign the contract, it says "pleasure doing business with you" and the flame on the candle is now blue. When you mess with the toggle on the computer, you get a backwards audio message in the same creepy voice as the Vallis Cineris code. When reversed, the audio says: " Someone help, the murderer’s name is Bill”

The prism that sits beside the computer has a code with the following symbols: #?&&!, which reads out as SORRY (this code is in the Book of Bill). When you input that into the computer, you get an image of college Ford and McGucket :(

That’s all I have for now! Feel free to reblog with anything else you might have found! I know of a ton more but I didn’t include them since this post would NEVER end.

[bagelzest]

ok I've been writing down every code I could find and what they do for thisisnotawebsitedotcom in my notes app so here's what I've found so far:

• tjeckleburg - NEVER MENTION THAT NAME AGAIN

• bill - eye of providence wiki page, then sesame street jazzy triangle meets a square square (same result with cipher)

• bill cipher - triangle wiki page

• weirdmageddon - gravity falls gossiper newspaper

• soos - letter from soos

• pinata - bill piñata gettin beat

• mabel - stickers on everything till 'LAB NOW FULLY MABELIZED'

• dipper - note from bill telling dipper to stare at the sun for 13 hours, enter multiple times for a retina burning sim

• mason - letter from dipper

• pines - A GOOD FAMILY TREE

• stan + stanley - brass knuckles ebay search, keep entering to get wheel of shame page

• ford + stanford + sixer- ford's polydactyly diagnosis + report

• pacifica - letter from pacifica

• wendy - note from wendy

• waddles - pigplacementnetwork.org

• gideon - sweat resistant bolo ties google search

• fiddleford - cotton eye joe mv

• dippy fresh - burger king kids club r/nostalgia

• axolotl - YOU ASK ALOTL QUESTIONS

• tad strange - bread slicing

• alex hirsch - flannel google search

• blendin - TIME AGENT LOST AND PRESUMED INCOMPETENT

• robbie - text chat between robbie and Thompson, pic of them being taken by bill

• gravity falls - NEVER HEARD OF IT

• mystery shack - confusion hill

• blind eye - eye test, colour code at bottom- euclmjiannrepttgccvisignnsupervisionn I think?? EDIT wtf was I on that is obviously not what it says

• reality - IS AN ILLUSION

• the universe - HOLLOGRAM

• deer teeth - FOR YOU, KID!

• fuck - I get told to wash my mouth out with soap :(((

• book of bill - HIDE IT UNDER SHIRT DURING PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE

• giffany - enter multiple times, computer tries to block, SOOS, I STILL LOVE YOU, giffany appears on screen, downloading file IM NEVER LEAVING! file has all her sprites, a doc called ILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU SOOS which is text in the shape of giffany

• euclydia - DIMENSION NOT FOUND

• portal - PORTAL.EXE HAS BEEN DELETED. I BET YOU COULD BUILD ONE

• toby determined - google search restraining order

• journal 1 - THE JOURNAL OF FUN

• journal 2 - THE JOURNAL FOR YOU

• journal 3 - THE JOURNAL FOR ME

• babba + disco girl - recording of dipper singing and listening to babba

• gun - OH YES OH YES OH YES THEY BOTH

• abuelita - best vacuum for walls and ceilings yt vid

• weird - weird al trapped in the computer

• xyler + craz - jem and the holograms theme song yt vid

• triangle - TRI HARDER

• theraprism - blue sign - IN CASE OF [the old one] DO NOT USE ELEVATORS

• yes - WHAT'S MCGUCKETS FAVOURITE SODA? (I tried putting in pitt cola and variations and nothing worked)

• no - YOUR LOSS...

• vallis cineris - creepy vid of baby bill held by static parents with voice saying why did you do it

• disney - RAT.GIF CENSORED FOR YOUR PROTECTION

• love + marry me (don't worry about how I discovered that) - pic of the love triangle book, click it and it plays an audio audiobook of it

• death - LIFE'S GOTH COUSIN

• life - LIFE: 72% COMPLETE. NOW LOADING: DEATH

• blanchin - how to blanch vegetables yt vid

• divorce - o' sadleys logo (aka the bar bill was at after "losing sixer" oh my GODDD)

• season 1 - SEASON -1: ANTIGRAVITY FALLS

• season 2 - SEASON 1

• season 3 - SEASON 2

• help me + save me + god - vid of axolotl swimming infront of a little bill statue

• ad astra per aspera - 2 journal pages starring ford and mabel, pls read them it's so good

• trigonometry - bill's attempt to have plato build the portal

• cray cray - mental health wiki page

• who are you - I COULD ASK YOU THE SAME QUESTION

• lies - bill talking about lying and nerds

• morality - fun game!

• R34LITY - henchmaniacs polaroids

• ducktective - DUCKTECTIVE STARS IN "LOVE, QUACKTUALLY" COMING TO: "OI, ITS THE COCKNEY CHANNEL INNIT?" THIS FALL

• question - ANSWER

• answer - QUESTION

I'm editing this post when I find new ones, feel free to add any you find!! please look at the replies to this post because people have found more codes!!

EDIT I'm probably done with updating this list, these are just the ones I found after goofing around on the website for 4 hours. other people have definitely made lists of all the codes found so far so make sure to check them out !!

[moolovesyou]

thanksgiving | angus tully x reader

a/n: watching boy meets world while writing. I USED FEMININE PRONOUNS, let me know if that's something you would prefer to be vague instead!! thanks for requesting cutie patootie!! :-] lmk if u would... like a part 2 for the dance maybe?

request: "truly adore you for carrying the angus community on your back… could you maybe write something about reader and angus not getting along (only because angus is smitten & an idiot who doesn’t know what to do about it so he gives off a completely wrong impression)?"

s: your family invites the Clotfelter's for Thanksgiving dinner, meaning you have to tolerate an entire dinner with the off-putting Angus Tully.

w: cursing, female pronouns.

wc: 1.9k

"Mom. Please. I'd rather go to Alcatraz for a semester instead of have dinner with them."

"I don't understand what's wrong with the Clotfelter's." Your mom flattened the tablecloth.

"It's not necessarily all of them I have a problem with." You mumbled.

The Clotfelter's had been a family friend ever since Stanley had been introduced into the picture. Him and your dad were best friends, which meant your family was one of the first to be introduced to the new and improved Tully's turned Clotfelter's. There were countless dinners hosted that lasted hours too long. It was constantly back and forth between houses. It could've been like any other boring family event. Tolerable. Unfortunately, their son had proven to be quite the obstacle.

You don't know why Angus Tully hated you. He practically loathed you. At least, that's what it seems like. He never said it outright, but he didn't have to. Ever since the first time he came around, it was an acrobatic endeavor to have any sort of genuine prospering conversation. You would try everything. A funny anecdote. A thought-provoking question. A joint quest to the outdoors. None of the attempts amounted to anything. He would always just kind of sit in silence. It was worse when he would talk though; always accompanied by an eyeroll and a sassy huff. He was a complete mystery.

So, you weren't exactly excited for Thanksgiving dinner with them. This was the dinner of all dinners. The one that your parents would kill you for if there was an ounce of angst in your face. There was no hope stored for you. You were better off waiting for leftovers. Nevertheless, you were stuck waiting for them on the driveway.

"Oh! That's them." Your mom chirped. She walked over to you, straightening your collar.

The three of you moved aside as the Clotfelter family parked in your driveway. You took a deep breath, stuffing your nerves down with crisp cold air. The slam of the car doors lifted your head. Your parents instantly rushed over to them, causing you to reluctantly follow.

"Y/N! How are you?" Judy embraced you in a lung-crushing hug. She carried a glass platter of god-knows what.

"Hello, YN." Stanley hugged you as well. Your parents ushered them inside.

That left you and Angus standing awkwardly.

"Um. . . Hi." You spoke sheepishly. He stared at you intensely with his lips pushed together into a fine line. You could never decipher what he was thinking. Is he staring at you because you have something in your eye or because he wants to microwave you?

"Hey." Angus muttered. His height made him loom over you. He was like a socially anxious batman. He stook his hand out. You clasped his hand in a clammy, firm handshake. It had the same formality as a business negotiation. He dropped his hand to his thigh, rubbing it against the fabric of his pants. His head turned to glance into the street because apparently it was more interesting than you.

Just then, your parents swooped in like angels and called you inside. You hurried inside, Angus trotting behind you in swift steps. The table was already set with bowls and plates of food that would have you knocked out by dessert.

The Clotfelter's sat on one side of the table, while you and your parents sat opposite to them. Angus sat across from you. He fiddled with his curls, long fingers entangling in his strands.

Before you knew it, the chatter had begun. The adults exchanged in grueling conversation topics that made you rot in boredom. You swished your mashed potatoes around on the plate.

"Y/N, how's school?" Stanley asked, making you perk your head up.

"Uh, it's alright. There's a winter dance soon, that's all the talk." You smiled shyly.

"Oh! I've heard of that. It's between both academies right, Barton and Wickline?" Judy chipped in. You nodded along in correspondence. "You must have boys lining up to take you."

Angus froze mid-chew, glancing at you quickly. His gaze was expectant. He sat up straight, squaring his shoulders.

You chuckled nervously, "Not really."

"Unbelievable. You're such a pretty girl. Isn't she, Angus?" Judy nudged Angus with her elbow.

He choked on a bite of turkey, coughing so hard his face turned red. Judy patted him on his back, concern laced on her face.

"Uh, sure. Yeah." He muttered, before shoving a bite too big of food into his mouth. His cheeks were stuffed like a squirrel. You scrunched your face in confusion.

"I think it would be good for these two to pair up for that dance. Might get her out of a book for once." Your dad joked, causing the table to erupt in chuckles and laughs. Well, except for you and Angus. Your faces were beet red at this point.

From across the table, Angus rolled his eyes. He stabbed his fork into a piece of chopped carrot. You couldn't help but be hurt. Was the idea of going out with you that repulsive to him? You narrowed your gaze at Angus. He chewed on his lips as your stare burned into his forehead.

"So, Angus. I heard about the vacation you guys are planning. Are you excited?" Your mom questioned him.

"Saint Kitts, yeah. Just glad to get some time away from school." He gave a small toothy grin, fiddling with the sleeve of his shirt.

"I think a bit of sun will do you good." You piped in, your heart beating fast. It was code talk for "I hope you burn to a crisp." Your nails dug into the skin of your palm as you clenched your fist.

He brought his hand to his pale face, his jaw slightly ajar. The parents laughed, slipping into another general bit of gossip. Angus furrowed his brows, his gaze flickering between your eyes. You scowled at him.

The rest of the dinner was forgettable. Two-thirds of the table was engaged in oblivious chatter. The other half had a blanket of tension sending the both of you into a blazing vacuum of fiery nerves.

Cutlery clicked against plates as everyone leaned farther into their seats. The food was obliterated. Not a trace left except for the struggle to breathe everyone shared.

"Y/N, Angus, could you both clean up?" One of the parents spoke up. You both instantly peeked at each other. They had all decided to abandon the table, retreating to the family room.

You had almost forgotten to breathe. It was like time froze and it was waiting for one of you to do something. As if fate yanked you both, the two of you leaned to grab a plate; fingers brushing against each other for a second. Angus flinched away. What the fuck is his problem?

You stacked a load of plates, lugging them to the kitchen. You started on washing the dishes. Angus creeped over in silence, slowly placing more plates beside you. He stood beside you, lingering. Every second he spent not doing anything, not saying anything, would turn your aggravation up one tick. You couldn't take his silence anymore.

"Why don't you like me?" You slammed the sponge into the sink, water splashing everywhere.

"W-What?" Angus stuttered, his eyes wide with fear and surprise.

"I said, Why. Don't. You. Like. Me." You stepped forward with each word, backing Angus slowly into a wall. He touched the wall with a small thud.

"Where did you get that impression?" His face was flushed. Angus was buckling under pressure. His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, a dry mouth materializing.

"Oh, I don't know." You spat sarcastically. You waved your arms in the air sporadically. "You don't look at me. You don't talk to me. I mean, I thought you were just shy. It was cute at first. Now, it seems like the mere idea of going out with me is revolting."

"Woah." Angus's face morphed into a confuzzled but serious expression. He grabbed you by the wrist, lowering your arms down by your waist. Yet, he didn't release his grip. It was a featherlight grasp. His eyes held a solemn look. "I'm sorry."

That was easy. Too easy. You bit your lip, refraining from rambling and hurling accusations.

"I wish I didn't appear that way. I just get nervous. . . around you." He continued.

What? "Huh? But-. . . I don't get it? Why? You rolled your eyes and acted like a whiny bitch, no offense." You shook your head in disbelief.

He chuckled, licking his lips.

"It's okay. God, I'm such an idiot." He threw his head back, banging it against the wall softly. "I would act like a whiny bitch because every time I said something, I thought it was completely stupid. I didn't want to embarrass myself. Now, I'm realizing everything I did was stupid. . . I'm so sorry, Y/N. You're just so. . . cool and awesome and. . . attractive."

"So, you don't utterly despise me?" You whispered, the thought seemed appalling now.

"Not at all." Angus took a deep breath, smiling at your shyness. "It's. . . actually quite the opposite."

"What does that mean, wallflower?" You grinned, biting the inside of your cheek to halt your smile.

"I think it means I like you." Angus leaned close, murmuring into your ear. You could feel the heat radiating off his skin.

"You think?"

"I know."

Your breath hitched. The two of you looked at each other with smitten smiles. It would send Shakespeare into overdrive.

"Can we start over?" You said in a hushed tone.

"Sure." Angus chuckled. Without missing a beat, he turned around swiftly, before turning back around with a surprised expression. "Hello there."

"Hi." You giggled.

"I'm Angus. " He reached his hand forward.

"I'm Y/N." You connected your palms. It was much different than earlier. Your nerves had traveled and evaporated out of your skin; your body felt like it was floating away and Angus was the only thing keeping you grounded. "I heard there's a dance this winter."

"Yeah?" He breathed, a smirk on his face. His eyes were half-lidded, his stare never leaving from your face. He was making up for all the averted glances that kept him from keeping your face etched into his mind forever.

"Would you like to go to the dance with me, Angus?" You took his other hand, interlocking fingers. Angus caressed your hand with his thumb. The more you looked at him, the more he absolutely bewitched you. Every curl in his hair looped straight to your heart. His scent was something you wished they sold in bottles. How could you ever neglect this beautiful boy?

"I'd love to, Y/N." He brought your hand up to his lips, planting a small peck. All that time spent thinking he was a complete recluse, you hadn't even considered he had a romantic side to him. "Has anyone ever told you how gorgeous you are?"

"Save it for the dance, handsome." You placed your hand on his chest. His skin prickled with goosebumps at the feeling of your touch. "We got dishes to wash."

Angus flashed another toothy smile, scooching beside you and picking up another sponge. Your faces were flushed with infatuation. You never would've thought at the end of the day you would be caught blushing by the one and only Angus Tully. But here you were, and god were you thankful for it.

[fordlee]

AU where Stan is the twins’ father, not their grunkle.

If he's being honest, he doesn't remember much about the kids’ mother. He fooled around with a lot of people. For money, for drugs, just to forget about the fact that he was living on the streets. A lot of people come and go, and it's easy to forget names and faces. God only knows how she managed to track him down. Or rather, track his brother down, considering Stanley is supposed to be dead.

The first time he saw his babies on his doorstep… It was like magic. There wasn't a doubt in his mind. He didn't need a paternity test. He could tell. They were his.

Which made it all the worse when the mother of his children went off on him, getting all up in his face over how Stan had ruined her life by saddling her with them. She never wanted kids. She thought she could handle it, but she can't. Stan did this to her, and she didn't care if it was him or his twin, but someone was going to take them off her hands. They were his responsibility now.

It infuriated Stan to no end. For one, he knew full well what it was like to be an unwanted child. To stand on the side of the road with a sign displaying he was up for sale. And for two, he wasn't no goddamn deadbeat dad! If she didn't want them, then good fucking riddance. They'd be raised by the parent that actually gives a shit about them!

So, The Shack and Stan's various scams end up not just being a means to pay for fixing up the big, metaphorical elephant in the basement, but also for necessities (anything for the kids), anything unnecessary (stuff for him), Soos and Wendy's pay, and saving up for two college funds. He feels guilty for splitting up his money in so many directions, but he knows Ford would understand. Ford will understand. Because Stan's getting him back.

He also feels guilty for keeping the twins in the dark about, well, everything. About their family. About why they need so much money. About where he disappears off to in the middle of the night. It's not fair to them, and he knows it, but he's doing it to keep them safe.

Everything he's done has always been for this family.

Though, Mabel and Dipper know little about their extended family. Maybe they get calls from their Grandma or Uncle Shermie, but that's pretty much it. Stan has wagered going down to New Jersey for a visit (last he checked, Ford was still legally allowed in the state), but that's a gamble he couldn't risk losing.

He didn’t want to see his Pops. Sure, to everyone else he was Stanford. Everyone in town knew him as such. His kids thought of themselves as the children of Stanford Pines. Hell, his own mother couldn't tell the difference at his own funeral. But, he had a feeling the old man would see straight through him. And from what he's told the kids, they're not interested in seeing him, anyway. So Gravity Falls is where they stay and the precious little the twins know about their family is through Stan.

Maybe he tells his kids about his brother - a different one, not Uncle Shermie. A twin brother named Stanley. He doesn't mention much. Just that they used to be best friends once. He thought they'd be together forever. But, something happened. It was Stanley's fault. Stanley… Left home. And they've never seen or spoken to each other since. He doesn't even know where his twin is right now. He shuts down Mabel's idea to track him down. It wouldn't be possible. Just let that be a lesson for them, to make sure they never grow up to be like their father and his brother.

Because it's important to Stan to make sure his kids have a healthy relationship. A normal sibling relationship. See, Stan figures a lot of their problems stem from how isolated he and Ford were. They could only really spend time with and confide in each other for the most part, which led to them turning to each other even for things that siblings should be doing together. Even after Stan got with Carla, even near the end, they were still kissing and touching each other. Not only was he a shitty brother, but a shitty boyfriend to boot.

Looking back on it now, he blames himself. He can't remember how it started, but Stan knows he always had a crush on Ford. It was probably something he did. By the time they were nearing the end of high school, Ford was clearly pulling away and Stan was too blind to see it. Too stupid. And now look, he fucked up everything. Twice.

He can't let that happen to his babies, too.

So, Stan makes sure Mabel and Dipper have people outside themselves to hang out with. Like his brother and himself before them, they aren't exactly the most popular kids in school. He knows some of the little shits there pick on them. And Dipper's a little introvert, so he’s usually holed up with some mystery novel somewhere, but Wendy and her friends seem to have taken him under their wing. Mabel has ‘found her people’ with her own little friend group.

Stan also blames his father's unequal treatment between them as a favor for why he and Ford ended up the way they did. Stanley always knew he was stupid and Ford's lesser half, he didn't need the old man to rub it in his face. He always turned to his twin for comfort, and no matter how much Stanford reassured him, it only reinforced what Stan knew to be true. That he needed Ford and he was nothing without him. He'd be eternally chasing Ford's coattails. And look at him now. Eternally nipping his brother's heels while living in his house and profiting off his studies to raise his kids and fix the mistake he made.

Well, nuts to that! Both Mabel and Mason are their own complete people on their own. They're great together, but equally as wonderful as individuals. Stan makes sure to never play favorites. By God, these kids are going to love themselves even if it kills him!

… And, in truth, raising his kids this way, trying his damndest to be a good dad and fix the shit that his Pops did with his own children… It's almost healing. He's far from the perfect dad. He knows it like he knows the back of his hand. Knows it like he knows the pain of a burning, infected brand. It's a constant, screaming mantras in the back of his head. He can always do more. But, he thinks he's made a good little family for himself. He only wishes Ford was here to be a part of it.

Raising the kids, having Soos and Wendy around, it's made him soft. That must be why it hurts so bad when Ford hits him instead of hugging him. That must be why, when Ford threatens to kick him out and keep the children - “Whose name is on the custody document, Stanley?” - he just takes it. That must be why, despite everything that's happened and anything that might happen afterward, he puts on Ford's clothes and pretends to be him. Because despite everything, he still loves Ford. He always will. And the last thing he thinks, before fire overtakes him and before everything goes black, is how he knows that Ford will take care of their kids.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ⁺

The children hate him. Ford knows it, and he deserves it. He deserves it for what he's done to their father, for how he's treated him, and most horrible of all, for nearly taking Stanley from them. Everything he's said and done against Stanley aches in his heart so deep and painful that he fears dying of a heart attack decades before Bill's prediction. Hurting him, insulting him, threatening to keep his children away… He didn't mean it, only wanted to lash out against him. Ford was far from perfect, but he wasn't so cruel as to kick out his brother and prevent him from seeing his children! Truthfully, he was already considering reconciliation. But, because of him, that had almost never come to pass.

He doesn't deserve Stanley's forgiveness after weeks of pouring over photo albums and home videos restores his memories, but Ford receives it regardless. The children aren't as forgiving, which is understandable. And Ford is perfectly content to wait as long as he needs so long as he has Stanley's approval.

And, really, Ford should leave well enough alone. He shouldn't bring up the more romantic parts of their relationship. He should leave it in the past and let Stan live in ignorance about their relationship being anything but normal and platonic.

But, he doesn't. And just as he'd hoped, had prayed, Stan is more than willing to once again indulge in that aspect of their relationship. Stanley really is too good to him. But it shouldn't be a surprise. Experience has shown that when they're together, they can never resist each other for long. And when they part, they always, inevitably, come back together

When they're alone, hugs turn to cuddles and kisses on the cheek become kisses on the lips. Ford lets Soos keep his break room so that he and Stan can share their bed. Before the kids wake up in the morning, either Ford or Stan will wake up first and cuddle the other awake. Stan will cook something up for breakfast and Ford will approach from behind, wrapping his arms around his brother and resting his chin on a shoulder, slowly rocking them from side-to-side.

When it sinks in that their Uncle Ford is here to stay and their Dad (for some reason) holds no real ill will toward him, Mabel and Dipper slowly start warming back up to him - especially with how suddenly affectionate their Dad and Uncle Ford have become.

Ford takes them all on little adventures and outings. He sells inventions and patents to contribute financially alongside Stanley. He purchases a boat that they all take out to travel on during holidays. Ford and Stan share equal interest in the children's schooling and interests and interpersonal relationships. Stan drops Mabel off for sleepovers and Ford picks her up the next day. He and Dipper have a little book club. He helps out in The Shack. They have family dinners at the table and all pile together in the den for movie nights.

It's all so wonderfully domestic. It hits Stanford out of nowhere one day that they really are a family again. Not just as two brothers and his niece and nephew, but as two parents raising their children together. It's near euphoric to realize that he and Stanley are co-parenting Mabel and Dipper. That Stanley is their father but it's Ford's name on the custody papers. It's a dream come true. It's a dream come true to have Mabel and Dipper run into his arms for a hug after school, to sneak a kiss with Stanley before dinner, and to cuddle up with Stan on their shared bed every night, resting his head on his chest and listening to Stan's steady heartbeat to know he's real, he's here, he's alive.

Their perfect happy ending.

Bonus: Pinecest with a darker!Ford:

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ⁺

Despite Stan's best effort, Dipper and Mabel end up getting crushes on each other anyway. Maybe they already know the truth of their father and uncle’s relationship, maybe not.

They're doing kissing practice when Ford walks in on them. They freak out, of course, but are a bit relieved when they realize it's Ford. Their Dad would freak, but at least Uncle Ford is more comfortable around weirdness. They try to explain themselves, both talking over each other with excuses and explanations, but Ford shushes them with a smile.

He tells them this is perfectly natural behavior between siblings. Twins, especially. Who knows them better, and who is better to be with them, than each other?

Their secret is safe with him.