#and find they are not quite the same

[robthegoodfellow]

Because this chapter is kicking my ass but I’m finally making progress—have a snippet. More Billy bonding with Patrick McKinney. Context: Ah... well. Carver & co. tagged the Hargrove house, called Billy a slur. And then Neil was Neil. And then there was a bit of a kerfuffle at school.

TW: reference to abuse and PTSD

Pat had called him up at Harrington’s the night before—the grounding had lasted only so long as his uncle was away, on account of his mother’s decision to keep certain parties in the dark regarding certain recent events. Sorry, man, Billy had mumbled, but Pat blew air into the receiver. Yeah, whatever—you wanna hoop after school tomorrow? And when Billy had pointed out he was kinda laid up at the moment, Pat was likewise dismissive: So you can warm the bench. Admire my moves.

The team had just been knocked out of the tournament—total bloodbath—but Pat was zen about it. We’ll get ‘em next year.

At lunch, Pat had taken one look at him and let out an arcing whistle. Even fading to yellows and greens, Billy’s face still eloquently spoke of blunt force not long past, but Pat restrained himself—didn’t ask about it until they were walking to the courts after last bell.

Billy gave him the Reader’s Digest version, capped it off with, “So. Guess you can say I told you so.”

Pat hummed, critical. “Don’t think I can, though. Didn’t expect him to, like—outsource it entirely.” He squinted. “Who knows what really went down?”

“The painting crew,” Billy began, and as the list went on, the scroll unrolling to drag on the ground, a knot clenched tighter in his gut. “The dweebs. Couple of their parents. Harrington, my sister. Then Eddie, Robin. You.” With a wince: “Chrissy Cunningham.”

“That one’s a surprise.” Pat dribbled the ball, biting his lips. “And—you’re good?”

With all of them knowing? About your dad?

“Eh.” He tried to smile. Couldn’t quite manage it.

“Yeah.” He glanced at Billy with an understanding quirk to his mouth, then took off, bounding for the basket for an easy layup.

“Oh, what moves,” Billy hollered, and sat himself on the bench.

It was cold but sunny, so he buried his dry hands in his jacket pockets, hunkered down in one of the scarves he’d snagged from Harrington’s coat closet—thick and forest green—and tried to savor the rays hitting his cheeks. Now and then, he shouted challenges: Jump from the three! Reverse layup! Alleyoop! At that one, Pat glared, panting, and joined him on the bench.

“Maybe if I grow another foot or so.” He knocked his shoulder into Billy’s. “And if you’re there to pass it.”

“Yeah.” Billy inhaled deep to check and yep—bright bursts across the sides of his chest. “Once the ribs aren’t screaming.”

“Fucking ribs.” Pat tsked like he’d had it up to here with them. “Those are the worst—‘cause like, only thing for it is to wait. And what’re you ‘sposed to do in the meantime? Not breathe?”  

“Just take the pain, bitch.”

Pat laughed, and Billy had been wanting to ask—but they’d only ever hinted at this shit, never really talked about it. Not directly.

Billy watched Pat spin the ball between his hands a moment. Several moments. Then: “Is it—random, what he does? Like the timing?”

The basketball stopped spinning. “Whatcha mean?”

It wasn’t defensive—not a you better not mean what I think you mean. Just neutral. So Billy let it come pouring out.

“Like… I used to think he—couldn’t help it, I guess?” He scrunched his nose. “Or not really that but… like he was Jekyll and Hyde, and when Hyde was out, he wasn’t in control. So for a while I tried not to trigger Hyde or whatever. But then…” Huffed a chuckle, a bleak sound. “After the divorce, I noticed that—that he only ever really lay into me—like, left marks—when there was time enough for them to heal up? Before Ma would see me next? Which meant… it wasn’t random. He was always in control. So…”

He shrugged, and Pat exhaled long, nudged his arm against Billy’s, but instead of retreating, straightening, he stayed. Kept leaning there.

Billy swallowed. Leaned back in return.

“I think it is kinda random, with him,” Pat said, finally. “Because to hear Mom tell it, he wasn’t this way before ‘Nam. Like he is more of a Jekyll and Hyde. Something happens and he just pops off, you know? Like that night after the party, the quarry, when I came in, I—” He snorted. “I stepped on an empty and it made this cracking sound and he—rocketed off the couch like he was electrocuted. And then he just—lost it. Always the same shit, shouting ‘bout I’m an embarrassment to this family.”

“Yeah.” Billy nodded, commiserating. “I hear that a lot.”

Pat grunted, swung his head around so he was eying him sideways. “Yeah, but you half believe it.”

“And you don’t?”

“Nah.” He cast his gaze off somewhere distant, then let out a huff, soft. “When he says that, he’s talking to himself.”

Billy couldn’t say anything a moment, overcome with this aimless, nameless thing—like grief, but not. Rage, but not. “Still not right,” he said.

Pat pursed his lips, the picture of equanimity. “I know,” he said. “I mean, not like I want him near me, no matter why he does it. But…” He tipped his chin back and forth. “Sometimes wish I could’ve met him—the old him. Ma says he was a lot like me.”

And then Billy imagined Pat—bashful, impish, shrewd Pat—plucked from his life and fed through the butchery, sent home a shell, his mind rigged with mines.

Thought of his own uncle, and how maybe it wasn’t a matter of who came home in a box or not—you were dead the minute your number was called.

He blinked the heat from his eyes, cleared his throat.

“Glad we were born when we were.”

“Yeah,” Pat agreed.

They were quiet a while, until Pat asked, with the air of someone gently closing the skeleton closet: “Think Lover Boy could drive me home?”

“Yeah,” Billy replied, rolling his eyes. “He’ll be here soon.”

Edited to add: chapter is up!

[technically-human]

St. Hilarion's ghost story

[coffeebanana]

there will never ever ever ever ever ever ever EVER be enough hurt/comfort fics. just so you know

[demaparbat-hp]

In your Spitfire AU, since Zuko is looking after Lu Ten II, what happened to Ursa?

Zuko is slightly older in the Spitfire AU. He was banished at fifteen, his head a little clearer and denial a little weaker than in canon. After his first look through the Air Temples, Zuko decides that if he can't find a myth, he might as well search for the next best thing.

Finding Ursa isn't easy, but in time he makes it to a secluded house in a near-forgotten part of the world. His mom is there, older and stronger and alive.

But she isn't alone.

And Zuko, as it turns out, didn't keep the best company during his search.

When Ursa is discovered and her secrets are laid bare for assassins (for Ozai) to find, she begs Zuko to take his little brother and run. She'll do anything it takes to protect her children, even if that means leaving them behind to keep a target off their back. Ursa diverts attention from them and allows Lu Ten's ancestry to be kept a secret. She orders Zuko not to follow her again, and disappears.

Zuko is left with a little three-year-old brother to raise and a mother he cannot hold onto.

[fl00mie]

honestamente, no sé

to prevent confusions i'm giving credits of every fankid in order (starting with the tall one)

layden (fresh x ink fankid) by @/sugary-alienn dot (cross x ink fankid) by @/yo-honne abstract (reaper x ink fankid) by CATA-824 on wattpad gradient (error x ink fankid) by @/askcomboclub paper jam (error x ink fankid) by @/7goodangel palette (dream x ink fankid) by @/angeutblogo blueprint (swap x ink fankid) by @/pepper-mint aiden (zack x ink fankid) by ariscastleart

[vaguely-concerned]

obsessed with the fact that if you choose the last purple option in lucanis' romance chat before going off to tearstone island ("they MOVED the MOON!!!" still in the running for the best delivery in the whole game btw it's so ineffably hilarious to me), it's rook who flinches away just a little bit (if still warmly <3) and tries to change the topic and lucanis who's steady even though he's clearly still so afraid. 'don't tempt fate'/'*the softest fucking voice you've ever heard in your entire life* I don't intend to'. pain and suffering

lucanis looking at rook and helplessly, with a wonder that verges on despair, saying 'what would I do without you?' is soooo. especially at that point in the relationship and with what's about to happen. and for whatever reason rook can't quite stay with the fact that they do mean that much to someone, that they are so reverently and so groundingly 'I want to know what your favourite food is so I can make it for you any time you want it' everyday loved, it's too much and they have to deflect from it or the fear of losing it. can say some very interesting things about them, too.

(there is also a Pattern in that in my estimation lucanis frequently responds better to inviting humour than to earnest shows of concern -- it seems to help him be more engaged/online to be offered that more neutral space to meet you in and uh 'build' the conversation around something funny together than to be confronted with compassion head-on because that clearly mostly deer-in-the-headlights him, as we also see with some of the early flirt options haha. contrast this especially with bellara, who repeatedly gets genuinely upset if you try to make light of some pressing and painful situation she's dealing with (girl I'm so sorry I'm so jestercore and I canot change this but I'll try :'( for you). I think the times lucanis reacts negatively to the purple options are much more about you siding with other (frequently more charismatic lol) people against him or throwing him under the bus interpersonally -- like seeming to go along with illario's charm offensives, or telling teia lucanis didn't want to come help out with caterina's funeral and he'd just sit alone and brood about it if you didn't force him (???!!! hello??? unprovoked and deeply unkind out of left field???? this option is so fucking MEAN and for what fhdaskjfa you're telling me there's no way for rook to be a bit of a dick in this game?)

when it's one on one conversation he consistently seems to find it quite comforting, though... which makes a lot of sense because in many ways it's how he interacts with illario, just shorn of the resentments and hidden daggers and things they Do Not Talk About but really should beneath the levity that makes it sharp. it's gone ugly between them, but I think the affectionate instinct beneath is real and goes back a long way before all of that festered -- it's a form of play he does with people he loves. and uh. not really caterina huh. notably.)

[novafire-is-thinking]

How To [Actually] Write a Combat Medic

…according to combat medics and those who know them - Part 1/?

* * *

I’ve learned that the best way to get inspiration for characters in certain careers is to find firsthand accounts from people within those careers.

So, in researching for Pharma and Flatline, I found some combat medic skits on YouTube, and I am LOSING MY MIND at some of these comments:

Of course, not all medics are like this, and these commenters only represent a small part of the combat medic population…but I’m rolling with it because, at least in Pharma’s case, one of my goals has always been to keep a little bit of the Unhinged around.

It’s nice to know I can back that writing choice with reality. lol

[starry-bi-sky]

yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.

Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.

When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.

And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.

With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

Tim was four days into a sleep deficit so he felt that to say that this predicament was his fault was a bit of a reach.

For it to be his fault he would have had to cognizant of the last 16 hours.

All he wanted to do was take a power nap in the nearest closest durring the Waynetech gala but nooo Bruce had to be taken hostage by the Joker.

So he did what he thought would work best and shoved uncle Clark into the nearest emergency bat storage and told him to suit up.

Maybe he looked a bit more confused than normal but they didn’t need a reporter they needed Batman!

That being said wasn’t uncle Clark supposed to be off-world?

Oh no.

———————

Jack honestly had no clue what was happening for the last six months so when he was told to be Batman he merely just shrugged as the frankly exhausted teen left him to his own.

With his son turning out to be part ghost to the government hunting down his said son and having to move shop halfway across the continent.

This might as well happen.

Grinning like a kid on Christmas, Jack plopped on the finishing touch.

“Oh Danno is not going to believe this!”

Raising a cloaked arm with a flourish Jack struck a pose.

“Alrighty Jack enough messing around! Time to save the party, Fenton style!

Shifting his feet, Jack took a deep breath before smoothing his face the best he could. After all, couldn’t have a smiling Batman! Before walking out the room and taking running leap through the wall to the streets of Gotham before grappling to the nearest building.

[rebornofstars]

sometimes i scroll thru my tumblr dash & think to myself with a bit of awe how lucky i am to be surrounded by a world full of beautiful ppl doing beautiful things. & yeah no there's no punchline to this one actually. i just love u

[fatedroses]

And some days, I just wish you wouldn't look at me at all.

[doctorsiren]

Angsty Psychic Lawers AU stuff?

like Separation Arc or Disbarment era

yeah so I decided Reigen’s disbarment was only gonna be 6 months since that’s the length of time that Mob was stuck in the mindscape world that Mogami made, and so it’s then the length of time that Mogami is Mob’s mentor (and also this allows the ages to not be all messed up LMAO haha)

[beepborpdoodledorp]

fnaf fans will look at security breach in the most black and white sense imaginable it’s almost incomprehensible ‘the Glamrocks are soulless AI and Gregory is a poor defenseless child’ ‘Gregory is an irredeemable monster who kills the poor Glamrocks without remorse’ have you considered it’s possible for both sides to be victims. that they can also be a little fucked up too. have you

[dreamyintersexouppy]

even when people are supportive of transfems and our struggles it's often expressed through sexualization which just diffuses any care people seem to be trying to show. they just find it much easier to see us as sexual concepts even if they do care genuinely for us somewhere in their hearts, but that doesn't matter anymore cus the post they made fetishizing our struggles will keep getting notes and turn into a trend and then die just as quickly once we demand the material respect implied by our issues gaining visibility... it just frustrates me thinking back on the amount of sexual trends that focused on us and objectified us that some of us even fell into because all we want is to feel loved...

[imerian]

Vr46 academy keychains

Set of five charms that all match in different ways

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 . ✦　　˚　

Open for detailed pictures of each one

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

ִֶָ 𓂃˖˳·˖ ִֶָ ⋆★⋆ ִֶָ˖·˳˖𓂃 ִֶָ

:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.:

˖⁺‧₊˚⭒✮⭒˚₊‧⁺˖

. ݁₊ ✶. ݁ ˖ˎˊ˗

I ran out of tags so I'll say it here but i would greatly appreciate a reblog, especially if you share your thoughts on these pieces in tags (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

(Also i forgot that bez have matching part with luca so I didn’t add that to tags sorry

[canisalbus]

To me, Machete kind of has the energy of a secondary villain/coldhearted side character in someone else's story that a lot of fans latch onto, moreso than the protagonist. Question is, would he be the villain in anyone's story?

Why, thank you! I'm actually glad to hear he gives off that vibe. I don't think he set out to become a villain but a lot of people certainly view him as one.