#and boy do i love to yap
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okay so @monstermoviedean is watching s14 rn and her takes are god tier!!! and you should all go read her blog please!
but it just makes me want to talk about lebanon/14.13 so much! like it really is one of my favorite episodes of spn. which is crazy i know because i truly hate john with every fiber of my being but i think this episode reveals so much about him & dean's relationship with him with delicious subtly!
and i've yapped at random on twitter about this but i want to gather all my thoughts in one place.
dean's relationship with john is The most important relationship in spn that i'm interested in unpacking. (i am normal and fine and this has nothing to do with my own issues)
i think for some people who understand john as abusive, it is frustrating and jarring to see him come back after so many years and just be kinda nice. especially given that dean has just finally started to talk to his family about some of the bad things john did.
i maintain that dean has been pretty clear with cas and like random strangers that his dad was shitty. but in 14.11, he tells mary the winchester surprise story. while he doesn't frame the story as truly a critique of john, it is a contrast to his quiet silence and pained expression after newly-resurrected mary says john was a good father in 12.02. in 14.12, dean opens up to sam about how when john was pissed off at dean, he would send him away. this is a stark new light on dean's comments from 7.14 where he apologizes to sam for sometimes "ditching him" when they were kids. sam quickly shuts down dean's apology in 14.12 and subsequent discussion about dean's regrets and feelings about john. but since sam's shift in his opinion about john in 2.02, dean pretty consistently keeps his criticism to himself in front of sam so this is a marked change. and the very next episode script draft includes the infamous "probably pulled the wide-eye hitchhiker routine. dad made me do it all the time on hunts. as bait." so, given the episodes and revelations that bookend 14.13, it's understandable how hard it is to see john and dean interact at all.
but i think it's perfect! because it so clearly shows every truth of their relationship.
firstly, we can look at who john apologizes to. in 1.16, 1.20, and 14.13 john is reunited with sam & dean after time apart. and in all three episodes, he apologizes and/or works to make amends with sam for their fractured relationship. in fact, in 14.13, it's a mention of the winchester surprise that triggers john's apology to sam.
in contrast, the only time john apologizes to dean for his childhood is 2.01 when he says sorry for making dean always have to look after him and sam. and then promptly asks him to kill sam if he has to.
it's crushing to me that at no point does john see the way he treated dean as anything to make amends for. instead, in 1.21 and 14.13, he frames dean not "having a home" or "having a family," "a normal life" as circumstances outside his control or as somehow dean's choice. and yet, john is entirely responsible. he is the one moving dean from school to school, getting him into credit card fraud, taking him on hunts. in 12.09 it's established that dean has as long arrest/warrant record which includes things we never see him getting arrested for in canonical spn. he is the one who always said hunting was temporary (6.02) and yet never allowed for a way out. so even though john's affect is kinder, we know he isn't meaningfully taking accountability for a huge amount of his actions.
it's the reason for the kinder affect we can look at next. because what is one of the most common indicators of abusive dynamics? treating people differently in public vs private. and critically for almost all of 14.13, mary is observing john. and we know that despite their marital problems (5.16), she considered him a good father. he doesn't know that the life he forced sam and dean into is the very worst thing she could have imagined for her children (4.03), but we can tell from his apologies to sam that john is at least aware of things he did which he regrets.
before mary arrives, he is giving sam and dean orders, "You boys better tell me what the hell is going on right now." i recognize he's very disoriented but this affect disappears entirely after mary shows up. i cannot overstate how much i love how not stern and harsh john is here because it shows that he could have always chosen to be like that. but there weren't negative consequences (a wife who might be angry with him) to face.
i've said before that i think one of the reasons that john kept sam & dean away from hunter gatherings and meeting other hunters (2.03, 12.06) is because hunters they met might have acted exactly how dean acts to krissy's dad in 7.11 and told him to quit. the hunters/community john did maintain relationships with were sometimes kinda shitty people - Deacon (2.19), Travis (4.04), Martin (8.09). not that Bobby, Caleb, Pastor Jim, Bill Harvell, Daniel Elkin were necessarily like that but I do think its worth looking at who John's friends who he didn't have a falling-out with were. Like Fred Jones who gave Sam & Dean their first beers when they weren't even 10 (8.08).
some other details about that first reunion kitchen conversation that always stick out to me are john finishing the drink dean pours for him while dean & sam barely touch theirs. it's also significant to me that dean tells mary in 12.01 that john died to save him. but here, he tells john that he died taking out yellow-eyes (which is literally not what happened. like specifically he died by making a deal with azazel). dean, always working to deescalate and maintain the peace, instantly clocks which thing they will each find more soothing to hear.
one thing that i see people often critique is the idea that john coming back is somehow the thing dean wished for the most. but what dean actually says is that this is something he's wanted since he was four years old. so it's really not about john back at all. john died when dean was 27. but mary died when dean was four. and that cause nearly every hard, traumatic, awful thing in dean's life. to some extent, i think it was about wanting john to have mary back. throughout dean's entire life, john used the loss of mary as an excuse for how he acted and what he made dean & sam do. so of course what dean wants most is... for that not to have happened.
and this brings my to my second favorite part of the episode. but you'll only catch if you're paying attention. dean says he's thrilled to have john back and yet at every chance he gets, he leaves the room john's in. he leaves the kitchen when john reunites with mary. dean gets the grocery list from mary while john has a tearful apology with sam. dean talks to john again only because he has to tell him about the pearl but then leaves to help cook. after dinner, he goes to do the dishes. dean really is not actually trying to spend time with john - even when they get a deadline for when their time with him is over, dean is not trying to make the most of it. and god i love him for that.
i sympathize with people who are frustrated to see dean fall back into the role of caretaker for john's emotions and wellbeing. and i agree but i appreciate that it is very clear that's what's happening. he's performing the role he's always been forced to perform. he may be more aware of it as a performance this time. he may be taking more steps to remove himself from having to interact with john. but i would almost feel worse if he wasn't getting john a drink, doing what he said, going on little errands, cooking, cleaning up. john says "You want to give your mom a hand?" and of course he goes.
i think dean always has held both deep hurt from and empathy for john and this episode is full of both of them. and while i think it's always hard to hear dean slip back into those moments of empathy (8.12 is always rough for me), it's so real that's where he would be sometimes. so much of being a child who's made responsible for your parent's emotions means that there is such a deep part of you that wants to protect them from harm.
i personally think the song "til it shines" by bob seger is an insane choice to play over their dinner scene. because, though that's not the part of the song that plays, the lines "Take the chip off of my shoulder. Smooth out all the lines. Take me out among the rustling pines, till it shines, ah, till it shines" always strike me as trying to see something through rose-tinted glasses in a way. or maybe acknowledging the performative, white-washing that's being done?
anyway, i understand why people want dean to have a cathartic yelling session with john. but honestly im not sure that would ever sit right with me. i think honestly 14.13 is kind of perfect. john comes back and it proves everything. john could always be kind (he took you to a freaking baseball game (4.19)). he could always apologize. he always did say he wanted the boys to get out of hunting but never even tried to make it happen.
and that brings me to my favorite part of the episode. my darling. my baby. my treasure. dean says, "i have a family." and what that means to him is his own. he gets to keep it. he gets to mean it without john's scrutiny. without him tearing it apart. the conversation sam & dean have over dishes is another deeply meaningful part. dean specifically rejects the idea of telling john the truth about any of it - even if it would change things. because he's good with who he is. "Cause our lives โ theyโre ours."
this matters so much to me because i don't think dean's healing can ever be contingent on john - not on his reaction, not on finally telling him the truth, not on john getting comeuppance for all the shit he did, not even on changing the past so john has more information because the critical thing that 14.13 and 4.19 show is that john literally did not do the best he could. so what could change that?
in the kitchen, dean tells sam that he blamed john for "the longest time". do you understand how much it means to me to hear him say that?! because i think of course blaming john is the first step! dean was hurt and he was angry about that and he should be!
but dean's healing can't just stop there. while i know there will be moments as he heals where he's angry with john again, the beautiful core of dean's healing i see in 14.13 is him being clear on where the boundary of him and his wants, goals, needs, and priorities are vs john's. i think a lot of dean's young relationship with john was him being forced to keep parts of himself (the parts that didn't like to hunt for example) secret out of shame and necessity. but here, i don't think dean is carrying that shame anymore. he is very clear on how what he wants from his life differs from what john would want but dean sticks to his own values. he has a family. he's good with who he is. it's just none of john's goddamn business.
anyway, as always mitski says it best....
plus we get two of THE MOST shots of dean's face of all time for me!!! like my god stabbing me would hurt less!!!
plus! PLUS!! CHERRY ON TOP!!! LOOK AT THESE NOOOOOODLES

in conclusion. your honor, i love her.
#14.13 lebanon#14.13#damn i should have been posting on tumblr alllll along#twitter is so short compared to this#and boy do i love to yap#dean & john#spn meta#i understand i am doing a bit of a restorative reading of this#on purpose#and there are other readings which are totally possible#and make me sadder#but i like this one#dean studies
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The Dellamortes
#Rook being denied her stupid ass pointy Tevinter mage shoes made her almost leave him at the alter#something something rook you know nothing about fashion leave this to the antivans#but also she wouldโve had 0 interest in planning it I know her ass showed up to her own wedding like a modern groom does#just shows up 0 input#the wedding portrait is FINALLYYYY here#when I tell u I redesigned rooks dress 1000 times#I was fighting with making it Tevinter styled because sheโs a Mercar rook but then I was like no no sheโs marrying into a crow family those#mfโs would GLUE feathers to her if they could#also do love the idea of them both being like do we have to wear white I donโt think anyone is thinkin the god killers r pure pious virgins#of course you have to wear white I SAID SO DAMNIT#dragon age veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age#rookanis#lucanis x rook#datv#rook#lucanis dragon age#rook mercar#rook dragon age#I was tryna keep it โhumbleโ cause chantry but also the antivansโฆ.. do not do humble#also I wonder if Rook Mercar saw a woman leading the chant and was like w hat the fuck#cause imperial chantry#also the idea that illario was at the wedding??? I know my rook was PISSSED#also so funny to think lucanis was desperate to leave his own wedding because p arty ugh#I know this is so much yapping but I just have so many feelings about their wedding lol#Vivienne Rook Mercar#well Vivienne Rook DELLAMORTE NOW BOYS AM I RIGHT HAHAHA#I just know lucanis wouldโve heard the chantry mother say โdo you Vivienne take this manโ and he wouldโve been like#who the fuck is Vivienne
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Sketchy comic with Doey and Riley (my player OC)! I kept seeing things about the book that was in a scrapped side quest (why must you take these things away from us MOB-) so I decided to make a comic with it! Iโm still trying to figure out how to draw Doey (and Riley if Iโm being honest-) but I thought it turned out good enough and have decided to throw it in here :D
Translation!:
Riley: Oh yeah, before I forget-
I got that book you talked about!
Itโs aโฆlittle roughed up.
But! Itโs still good to read!
Sorry it took me so long to get it
That โDocterโ dude wouldnโt stop ranting. (So annoyingโฆ)
Doey: Thank you, Riley.
Riley: Of course.
Doey: You wanna help me read it to the others?
Riley: Ah-
- - -
Ending/Bonus :3

#my boy#my son#Iโm going to draw Riley hugging this dude TRUST#Iโll drop a yapping session about Riley later if yall want#I made this sleep deprived so Iโm expecting to wake up and hate this lmao#doey the doughman#doey poppy playtime#poppy playtime oc#poppy playtime chapter 4#dogday#hoppy hopscotch#catnap#kissy missy#those four are just chilling lol#poppy playtime player oc#oc art#my art#mini comic#I donโt do these often-#my sillies#I love them so much#Iโm still trying to cope after chapter 4s ending#but I might also be making it worse for myself-#(silly/stupid addition: Riley has a Scottish accent so I think itโd be funni hearing them read the book lmao)#Riley Chambers#Misfit Menagerie AU
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in case you are in the mood to feel devastated hereโs an alternate way of viewing charlesโ response to edwinโs confession:
we know that charles kinda puts edwin on a pedestal- yes they are partners but there is a bit of a hierarchy between them. charles just looks up to and admires edwin in so many ways while constantly looking down on and being really hard on himself. he puts on his big happy persona because he thinks that people wouldnโt like him if they actually got to know him.
so when edwin confesses, itโs like a blow to him. he took his charming persona too far and went and tricked the most important person in the world into thinking he was worthy of love. and itโs worse because he does love edwin in that way, which is exactly why he canโt let him know that. charles still believes that he is like his dad, and he saw exactly what his parentsโ relationship did to his mother.
he thinks that loving edwin in the way that he wants to would only cause more pain to this boy who has already been through far more than he deserves. so he blinks back his tears, attempts the same charming smile heโs used all these years, and dishes out the gentlest non-rejection in the history of forever
#i donโt really think this is what happened but my brain just loves to add an extra sprinkle of angst to everything#but honestly the more that i study that scene the more i think this is a possibility#at least to some extent#like specifically his facial reactions after edwin says heโs in love with him#he looks panicked and devastated#almost like it was something he thought about before and was afraid of it happening#and then he cracks his little joke to downplay it because he isnโt ready to accept that whatโs really happening#because he already had to watch edwin get dragged away before he could step in to protect him and now this#his two worst nightmares became reality in hell#anyways i do think heโs just oblivious and will figure it out in season 2#but i just wanted to ramble#i do think a lot of the reason why he has to figure things out is because heโs afraid heโs a bad person#so itโs more him figuring out if heโs good enough to love edwin rather than if he actually does#okay iโm done yapping for now#dead boy detectives#payneland#charles rowland
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ok this might be hella long, but I need to scream about some details about Makoto Yuki in Persona 3 Reload, because they're so missable so I feel like nobody else has noticed or cared about them other than me!!!!
Please someone hear me out ๐ญ (spoilers ahead)
One underrated thing about Reload, which is my favorite thing ever, is that we get to hear Makoto's thoughts when interacting with the world around him. Compare it to FES where the game's inner dialouge is in 2nd person, Makoto's inner dialouge in Reload is in first person.
I didn't give too much attention to a Makoto's thoughts in my 1st playthrough and I think it's what made me not as attached to Makoto as I would've liked in that playthrough. But god, in my 2nd playthrough, especially after watching the movies, all of that changed...
I noticed that Makoto's thoughts genuinely change as the game progresses. You see him start off as indifferent to everything, to cherishing the memories he's made with his friends.
For instance, take a look at his thoughts on the kitchen. I don't have a screenshot of this, but at first, he doesn't really care and just sees it as another tool. But as the game progresses...

This dialouge makes me swoon every time ๐ญ๐
One of the biggest hidden details is Makoto's inner thoughts when you interact with the book on the dorm table. He has individual thoughts on the handwriting of each member of SEES as they join, which were delightful to read in my 2nd playthrough.


But what shocked me the most was after Shinji dies, if you interact with the book, then here are Makoto's inner thoughts:


That "..." doesn't show up if you interact with the book again. This was very intentional. And god, did that hit me extremely hard. In fact, if you interact with anything involving Shinji after he passes, you can really see how much Makoto respected him :((


Once January rolls around, Makoto's thoughts change to this sweet message ๐ญ๐


Ngl I almost teared up when I saw this for the first time. Especially since it was my 2nd playthrough, and I was actually attached to Makoto this time + I knew what was up ahead :')
shit there's even dialouge if you go to the bathroom on the Promised day ๐

Don't even get me started on Makoto's inner dialouge on March 4th. Pretty much everything interactable is changed to fit the mood of how tired Makoto is, but also how much he's appreciated the year and the memories he's made.
Like when you interact with the kitchen, his inner dialouge about the kitchen changes once last time to this (credits to alanamisako):


This shit made me burst into tears so badly ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ "I'll never forget those precious memories" FOUL atlus, FOUL!!! His thoughts on Shinji's room change on March 4th as well ๐ฅฒ
Just seeing how much Makoto had grown throughout the game, and knowing what was to come, made this, and all the other March 4th dialouge, even harder to get through in my 2nd playthrough. It also resonated with me, because I too will never forget the precious memories I've made with this game...
Things like this make me appreciate Reload so much. Interacting with every little thing is my favorite pass time in video games that allow me to do it. I've probably wasted so much time in games doing this. But most game's interactables don't have this depth, and they certainly don't change at all, even as the game and protagonist develop. I also feel like nobody else takes the time to really interact with everything or see if there's anything else to see before they progress (trust me, if a game says go left, I'm always going to go right first), and it makes me sad that so much of this, and other details, go unnoticed. I've certainly heard "I've never noticed that" a lot when sharing these sorts of things with people ๐ญ
Things like this really help flesh out the protagonist people call "bland". I really love silent protagonist and developing their personality based on their thoughts on the world around them. I also love worldbuilding and learning about other characters through it.
And I'm trying so hard to not let Makoto take Joker's place as my favorite protagonist (cuz the rest of SEES have already done that to the PTs LOL) but it's been getting harder these days. Makoto is just so perfect! I love his growth & seeing all of his inner thoughts and combining it with movie Makoto's AMAZING characterization (plz watch the p3 movies ya'll) just made me super attached to him!! I could scream about Makoto all day. He cares so much for his friends, and it's thanks to them that he's able to appreciate the life he didn't know he could have ๐ฅฒ
So I highly encourage you to interact with everything when playing Reload! From NPCs, to random things that aren't the main objective (trying to leave when you're supposed to be fighting a full moon shadow leads to some funny dialouge for instance), etc etc.. especially as the game progresses. I mean, we all laughed at the 3 coffins in the Love Hotel, and there's so many other details and foreshadowing like that I can't even get into! It really immerses you and attaches you to the protag, but also makes the end of the game hit hard...That "my eyes feel heavy" got me horribly in my 2nd playthrough after keeping up with Makoto's thoughts the entire game HOO BOY!๐ฅฒ
I also recommend you do this with other games as well. Video games have always been an experience over just a game to me. And I want to experience as much of the game as I can, even silly little things like this :)
#makoto yuki#minato arisato#persona 3#p3r#persona 3 reload#p3 mc#my gawd this is so long..the adhd took over. do ppl even read these tumblr essays?#someone please enthuse about this with me#i've been going so insane i love yukiiii my baby boy#and i love P3 Reload so much man i dont think anything on the planet could top it#i hope my yap session made you appreciate Reload a bit more as well#or maybe i just sound insane. eh i'll take that
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Wow I have been nonstop thinking about tennis king yuuta and his little baby boy Iโm going to kill you (affectionate) - @yuutito
teeheeeeeeeeeโฆ.. hereโs some more, aleks :โ) enjoy :))))))
โEverybody thinks he looks like me, but I donโt see it that way. Maybe itโs because every time I look at him, I see my wife and Iโm reminded of her [โฆ] Iโm a little biased so I see her in everything.โ
You find yourself with tears welling in your eyes the more you read into Yuutaโs latest magazine interview. Between his sweet quotes and the pictures of him with your son, itโs taking everything in you not to burst into full-blown tears.
Your boys look so handsome. You and Yuuta shared your concerns with publicizing your child at such a young age, but you two came to the conclusion that youโd rather have the control in the narrative than to let private family pictures be leaked uncontrollably. As another point of reassurance, Yuutaโs career provided him with just enough lime-light to be a household name without the crazy fame and criticism that came along being a true celebrity. BesidesโYuuta talked enough about you and your son in press conferences and interviews that it was bound to happen sooner rather than later.
The article wasnโt entirely about you, or your familyโor at least, youโre sure it wasnโt intended to be; you knew your husband had a knack for rambling about his loved ones, even where work was concerned. As you continue to read, you find a segment where the author compared Yuutaโs current statements with something similar heโd said about you twelve years agoโat the very start of his professional career: โIf I owe this [winning Gold] to anybody, itโs my girlfriend. Sheโs always believed in me, even when I didnโt believe in myself. I wouldnโt have qualified or even thought to qualify if it werenโt for her.โ
It feels like you and Yuuta were just two kids in love back then. You didnโt think it could be more than thatโyou didnโt think you could love Yuuta more than you did all those years ago, but somewhere along the way just being in love wasnโt enough to describe it; Yuuta became your partner, someone you loved fundamentally, but also because you couldnโt stand to see yourself without him. And just when you thought you couldnโt love anyone nearly as much as you love him, you turn the page to a picture of your husband and son peeping through the holes of a racket and your heart feels full.
When you scan the image more closely, you realize that it isnโt just any racketโitโs an old one, one youโd given to Yuuta as a gift probably back in high-school. You had no idea heโd kept it, but you suppose you shouldnโt be all that surprised; Yuuta is nothing if not sentimental.
โAh, there she is~โ Yuutaโs voice cuts through your thoughts. When you turn, you see him, with your baby boy on his hip, sliding the back porch door closed.
Both boys approach you with a smile on your face, and you set the magazine aside to sit up in the lounge chair to greet them. Yuuta presses a kiss to your forehead, then your lips before you do the same to your son. Immediately after, he reaches his arms out for you, and Yuuta chuckles, โYou wanna be with your mama? Canโt blame you, I missed her, too.โ
He hands the baby off to you, and takes a seat on the other end of the chair, reaching over to coo at his son as you smother his face in kisses.
โHow was the farmerโs market?โ you question, letting the baby settle into your lap.
โGood, he picked out some very bright peppers, and we got some more strawberries, know youโve been craving them,โ Yuuta smiles, reaching over to pat your sonโs head, when the closed magazine catches his eye, and he reaches for it, quickly flipping through, โAhโI guess that interviewโs out. Heโs grown so much, even though it was only a few months ago.โ
You find the blush on his cheeks beyond endearing. Yuuta always finds room to be bashful no matter how many times heโs waxed poetic about his love for you, or his familyโhis cheeks always stain pink like the first day you met him.
โItโs sweet. Youโre sweet,โ you smile, sparing a hand to run through Yuutaโs hair, charmed by the way he leans into your touch, โI didnโt know you still had that racket.โ
โOf course, I keep everything you give me,โ he says, earnestly. He closes the magazine and scoots a little closer, taking advantage of the proximity and of your touch to lay his head on your shoulder, โDid youโฆ read all of it?โ
โAlmost, but no, why?โ you question, with a light-hearted grin, โDid you say something that would lead the world to believe youโre somehow even more in love with me? Because you might already be past the threshold, dear.โ
Yuuta hums. He reaches to take you son out of your lap and carefully shifts himself to that heโs laying down, his head on your lap, and the baby in his arms, happily giggling and cooing as Yuuta holds him up. He lowers and raises him back and forth a few times, nuzzling their noses together when their faces are close, before sitting him up on his chest.
Then he tilts his head up to look at you, wide, love-filled eyes blinking slowly before he says, โMaybeโฆ depends on if me saying I want more kids is past the threshold or not.โ
#answered#this is like... set before the press conference drabble and interview is like when the baby is maybe 9mos?#and comes out when baby boy is just shy of 1 year teehee#yuuta my wife my wife my wife okkotsu#has plenty of gold medals around his neck in pictures and the quotes are still oh i love my wife ~~~#SICK!!!! I NEED HIM!!#he would enjoy this level of fame i think bc he gets to yap to the whole word about his family#but then its still chill yk? like paparazzi dont stalk him people dont follow him and interrupt his day#he just gets to do what he loves and have enough money to support his family#and come back to you and your baby every day... dream life for him#also not pictured bc money and power is attractive sorry: the back porch door opens to the lounge/porch ofc#but beyond that pls imagine a regulation size tennis court#and all the expensive tennis accuoutrements one might need#see also also on the OTHER side of the backyard: the regulation size swimming pool that you dont need but yuuta thinks the kid(s) should#learn to swim... also for gojo LOLOLLLL#yuuta x reader#yuuta.ask#tennis au
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So i drew some fanart of @pompadorbz sorry boys "still wakes the deep" au ! I had fun with the more action filled drawings, and definetly wanna do more >:P








While drawing, i got to brainstorming about what character roles the boys might take in the story. Like, charlies probably caz, and maybe phil is caz's friend whos a cook (i forgot his name) but then i thought about if characters like Rennick had a coresponding cc, and i immediately thought about schlatt. So, i have ideas about what expanding the au might look like, but this isnt MY au, so for now ill hold off on yapping my ideas and just share what ive drawn for now
But either way, i REALLY enjoy this au and love all the ansgt potential it has. Like i was thinking, who out of the boys would end up being the last one? (Aka, taking caz's place at the end of the story with the lighter) and thought that, out of the boys, it would just make the most sense to be tommy. And thats HORRIBLE, AUGH ITS SO SAD but i LOVE IT
Anyways, sorry for the rambling, i hope you guys enjoy the art :] i still have to draw that other scene with charlie on the elevator, tho, so i might come back with more later
#i genuinely really do like this au and have so many ideas about how to expand the lore#but i need to stop getting so hyperfixated on one story and making more and more uneeded lore#it really is a problem#so for now im just sharing this fanart#which was actually really fun to draw btw!#also i really love the art style of the aus op and honestly think it fits the vibe so well#its like one of those really simplistic indi horror games that ends up being literally terrifying in a good way#anyways ive yapped long enough i hope you like the fanart#slimecicle#charlie slimecicle#ranboo#ranboo fanart#tommyinnit#tommyinnit fanart#philza#philza fanart#sorry boys
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For scientific purposes I timed how much of that stream they spent yapping instead of gaming (and I was quite loose with the concept of gaming, I counted their owl slide roof nonsense as gaming)
A whopping 16 MINUTES of the roughly 30 minutes they were on the live stream was spent not gaming
#never change boys#I love you dearly#they get invited to do an official gaming life stream#and spend over half the time yapping about nonsense#dan and phil#dnp#daniel howell#phil lester#dan and phil games#phan
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"magical boys"
*BREAKS DOWN A WALL AMD CHUCKS MINI ROLLOS TO ANYTHING IN SIGHT*
WHERE?!
*visibly shaking* I am normal about this reversal trope of magical girls. I can definetely be trusted to not squeeze this mozarrella with a bowl cut to death. *mini rollo definitely being squeezed to death*
No idea if it's three anons or one but that's really sweet โจ pls beware depending on which guy you plan to eat some of them give food poisoning or hallucinations (thinking abt some as those small colorful rainforest frogs)
I love magical girl animes very much, grew up watching tokyo mew mew (and somehow managed to watch wedding peach all on youtube a long time ago, i did not understand the english subtitles at all lmao, rewatched it years later and loved it), so imagine my surprise when I stumbled accross the first (if you ignore saint seiya) full on magical boy anime in 2015 and ever since I wanted to draw my own, and now I have my musketeers :)))
A lot more magical boy yapping under the cut because I love this trope so much
Anime I'm talking abt is 'Binan Koukou Chikyuu bouei-bu love' btw ! It's on the parodic side but not as much shitpost-ish as 'magical girl ore' for example. It takes itself "seriously" in it's own way. (and the ending song talks about 2 characters of the show that drifted apart and how there's 3 meters only separating them but it's enough for one to miss the other and aughhh my heart I could yap about this for ages)
LOOK AT THEM (couldn't find a decent pic of the season 1 clothes, this is season 2 and the pic is still low res augh)
Like, I was ?? idk in my last year of middle school maybe when I found this ?? fantastic discovery. Pink wombat mascot with the voice of an old man gives cute bracelets to 5 guys to save the earth. They have to say "love making" and kiss their bracelet to transform, I'm crying And here's the villains of season 1 and season 2 (twins) (silver haired bowl cut annoyed guy is my favorite, what a familiar description....)
There's 3 seasons in total to this anime and season 3 has a new cast of guys but years later at the same school !
Scenario is basically the same as season 1 but with different guys and villains, but omg the otter..... I love that yellow otter so much..... (look they have magical ace and deuce ) Villains of season 3 are called "edelstein knights" or something (ince again an angry guy with ridiculous bangs considered a villain, my beloved)
Other legit magical boy I love a lot is 'Fairy Ranmaru' !! It takes itself more seriously than binan koukou, in it's own scandalous way I'd say. They went ham with the fanservice during transformations it's crazy-(especially uruu's transformation) def +16 at least They do try to talk about serious matters and feelings/emotions in general. I cant' really tell if it's well written since I'm really an easy audience, I should watch it a second time... It's a visual experience at least if you're into that kind of designs
Blue guy my beloved.... Not showing any more, you can find the transformations on yt crunchyroll literally published them
Alright one last "magical" boy/girl, it's not even exceptionnal but it's a fever dream shitpost that has a special place in my heart : 'Classicaloid' So a girl's father created humanoids with the memories of classical composers and went to get milk, leaving them all. The classicaloids eventually decide to squat at the girl's house. They have magical powers called "musik" and have a small transformation animation. So to a certain extent I do consider this a magical people anime.
Here's everyone from season 1 (untransfromed) Beethoven and Bach (maybe mozart too tbh) are the most recognizeable but good luck to guess the others :') (Liszt and Tchaikovsky are genderbent) They are all so whacky together I love them so much, bach only speaks in musical terms "andante, pianissimo etc.." Chopin is the looser of all times, Mozart is.... Mozart, and Dvorak (season 2) became a pigmy hippo for literally no reason The animation is nice but the ending song illustrations ??? dang
First two pics are from season 2 endings, they all represent an important location for the composers or something related to them (for example Chopin's is the pรจre lachaise cemetery in paris where irl one has a tomb) Really I'm amazed by all the ending art pieces, I can't put more than 10 pics per post, I would've showed them all otherwise eeee) On the thrid pic you actually see mozart in his musik outfit ! An in one ep he even lets his hair loose ahierjh
(takt:op is absolutely in my watchlist)
If you made it this far thank you for listening to the yapping, wether it was interesting or not ! :)))
#Idc if yall already know these animes here's my yapping powerpoint anyway#I love colorful chara designs aughh#Classicaloid is just the merging of many things I like- weeb - magical - shitpost- and classical music and it pleases my brain#I have so many screenshots of chopin(loid)#I should do some more make fanart of all these magical boys tbh now that I'm feeling convinced by how I draw#music animes in general are good aughh mashiro no oto or kono oto tomare!!! (hell even utapri I loved watching this in middle school)#The kongming anime was so good and fun too omg#man I love music#I hope there will be more magical boys in the future or even an everyone magical pls#cease this torturing of the mini-rollos !!!!!!!!!!
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wE wAnT cOmPaNiOnS tO bE mEaN aGaIn!!!!!!!!!!
my siblings in the maker, you can't handle Taash calling Emmrich a death mage couple times or [checks notes] ...asking Neve about her clothes [?????????????]
#him yapping about death&corpses and making Taash uncomfortable MULTIPLE TIMES with no fucks given about it is A.OK.#but them telling him he's a โdeath mageโ which technically (whether he likes it or not) HE IS to most people outside Nevarra...#is a crime deserving worst insults... OOOKAYYYY.#โskull-fuckerโ is mean sure. but ain't that what you want?? companions being mean???#BUUT i just saw someone calling them โjudgementalโ & an โassโ over asking Neve about her clothes??? EXCUSE ME?#do you really read their initial comments as MEAN SPIRITED???#they have such a lovely banter about the meaning of appearances and clothes. like.#what in the sweetest hell are some of you even talking about.#you fuckers don't want โmean companionsโ you can't handle โmeannessโ AT ALL.#all you want is pretty boys bickering behind your back. being catty and shit. lets call things for how they are.#every time female/female presenting characters do that they are insufferable in their bitching (see Aveline & Isabela)#men tho? hot. desirable. funny even. (see Anders & Fenris)#this stupidass fandom man#y'all need to sit down and think about yourselves for a moment. or a year. maybe longer.#and don't tell me i'm wrong. 'cause i've seen enough stupid posts to know that i'm in fact right.#Taash critical posts are basically blocking lists to me at this point.#UGH.#blah blah text post#irregular tag ramble#lady whines#fandom critical#negativity#dragon age babbling
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I miss yuchea so...look at my beautiful boy
#doodz#twst#twisted wonderland#malleyuu#<i guess#i miss him sm i dreamt someone made a malleyuchea animation ๐ฅน#i just love showing him off i love them so much#repost*#thank u for looking at my lovely boy again. so i wanna yap a bitโบ#yuchea isnt their universe proper yuu! they arrived 2 years before the event of the game so the 1st 2nd year art is back then#yuchea actuslly do have magiv thats why when their overblot happened spontaneously it fuvk him up real bad !!#yeah โคโค i love yuchea so much i always miss them (doesnt draw him)
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X-Men Textpost #3
Back again with the third X-Men textpost inspired by some of @wishchip106's posts!
Post 1, Post 2
I'm saving my favs for last ๐
#x men#charles xavier#cherik#erik lehnsherr#charles x erik#x men films#x men movies#x men fandom#I love the scene where Apocalypse is yapping to charles about what he wants charles to do for him and charles keeps glancing at erik like ๐คจ#there's even a point where apocalypse says something he plans to do and charles looks over at erik like 'are you kidding me? HIM?'#CHERIK FOR THE WIN#Oh and also Charles is a national treasure#a SPECIMEN#Apocalypse's annoyed look gives me LIFE#he's so pissed at charles being the good boy that he is#charles is over here trying to save the world and apocalypse is just like 'listen here bitch'
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sun hasnโt even risen yet and Iโm feeling so emotional about how Dan is living proof that growth takes time but is so worth it and sometimes you donโt work through the hard stuff until youโre well into adulthood bc just getting by took enough energy and you simply didnt have the tools yet and we now know that things got so dark for him and im sure the darkness will come again bc thatโs how these things go but now heโs smiling with his crows feet and laugh lines and silly clothes bc now he can love his body enough to put it in silly outfits before going out into the world and heโs goofy and playful and in love and idk guys life can be so defeating and it sure was for him at times but here he is this gleaming imperfect beautiful example of work and growth and acceptance and self love
#love you Dan Iโm sorry that Iโm such a sap about Dan#but idk man itโs 15 yrs and he was just a boy and then he was just a scared mess#trying to keep everything under control#and now he doesnโt have to bc heโs safe in himself#and Liamโs dead and maybe that tangentially has something to do with how Iโm feeling#bc man Iโve lost so many people to mental illness#and I know itโs so complicated and to use that broad stroke categorization to describe something so personal is simply wrong#but itโs also not all that complicated we just need to feel safe and worthy and loved and need to have enough space in our psyche for hope#enough space to imagine a tomorrow. and when you donโt have that itโs so hard to just keep on trudging through the mess. but it is worth it#and the fog clears#dan and phil#dan howell#me yapping
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Hey!! For your next fic could you do Leo and Mikey angst
It came be 2012, MM or rise
~ ๐๐๐โ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐๐ ~
๐๐ข๐งก ๐ต๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ข: @tmntalways ๐๐ข๐งก
ยทฬฉฬฉฬฅอ๏ผ*โขฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*ห๐ท๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐!!! ๐ธ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ โน๏ธ๐โฆ๐ธ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐๐ ๐ธ ๐ ๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ข๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ธ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ข ๐ข๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ฉท!!! ๐ฐ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ธ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ธโ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐
๐๐พ! ๐ธ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โ ๐ธ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ซ โฆห*โข ฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*๏ผยทฬฉฬฉฬฅอ
๐ถ๐๐๐๐: ๐ท๐๐๐/๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
๐๐๐๐๐: ๐น,๐ธ๐พ๐พ
๐ป๐๐: ๐ผ๐๐๐๐ข ๐ข๐งก
๐ป๐๐: ๐ป๐๐ ๐ข๐
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข: ๐ผ๐๐๐๐ขโ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โฆ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โฆ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ฃ๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โฆ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ '๐๐'. ๐ฐ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐? ๐ท๐ ๐๐๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ขโฆ
๐๐๐๐: @shut-up-jo @someone1348 @saturnzskyzz
@savemeafruitjuice @rice-cake-teen10 @mistyandsnow
@skyloladoodles @itzsana-kiddingmenow @titters-and-tingles
(๐ฐ/๐ฝ: ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐โฆ๐๐๐ *๐ฐ๐ท๐ด๐ผ* ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข: ๐ณ๐๐โ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ข! ๐*๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐บ๐๐๐/๐ฝ๐๐ต๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ณ๐ฝ๐ธ!!!)
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐: ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐-๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ฟ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ฟ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ฟ๐ป๐ด๐ฐ๐๐ด ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐!!!
๐๐ด๐ผ๐ธ๐ฝ๐ณ๐ด๐: ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐โ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ท๐ณ ๐๐๐/๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐!!! ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ข ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ก๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข โบ๏ธ๐๐๐๐
๏ผ*โขฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*ห๐ฐ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐บ๐พโจ๐๐ถห*โขฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*ห๏ผยทฬฉฬฉฬฅอ
Mikey couldnโt do anything right now. Likeโฆanything.
Wellโฆperhaps he was being a bit too dramatic. He was breathing. And he was fidgeting with his squishy cube. So saying he wasnโt doing 'anything' wasnโt entirely true.
Right now he justโฆcouldnโt do anythingโฆproductive.
For example, the box turtle tried making his favorite dishes and deserts! But that endeavor just ended up being a huge mess in the kitchenโฆand leaving the youngest turtle with a bunch of unappetizing food.
Which he fed all to Raph by the way.
Some would call that choice of action cruel but Mikey would just call it 'using his resources'.
Besides, itโs not like the eldest minded at all. He said, and I quote: 'It has a niceโฆcrunchy feeling to it. Did you put some of Donโs inventions in this?'
Which honestly got a couple of chuckles out of the smallest turtle teen of the bunch.
Then, Mikey tried skateboarding! But for once in all his 14 years of livingโฆit was just utterly boring.
And after all of that nonsense, Mikey then finally tried reading a comicโฆbut he was too unfocused to even get to the second pageโฆ
But what was really new? Mikey could never focus on jackshit even if said jackshit hit him right in the shell.
His brothers and sister would always have to remind him to stay focused or 'not do this' or 'not do that'.
For example, a couple days ago Donnie had to kindly remind the box turtle (wellโฆas kindly as Donnie could be anywayโฆ) to brush his teeth.
To. Brush. His. Fucking. Teeth.
And honestly? Having to be reminded to do that was really embarrassing. And the orange banded teen knew his brother didnโt mean to humiliate him internallyโฆbutโฆyeah.
And itโs not like the softshell was wrong either! The youngest turtle just couldnโt freaking accept that he himself couldnโt do such a simple task in the morning.
But literally every task he completely fails to do is just utterly simple ones!
Like cleaning his room or not forgetting things or even keeping track of time!
โฆAnd the sad part about all of it was Mikey just honestly could not understand how his family havenโt gotten sick of his annoying tendenciesโฆ
And letโs be for real hereโฆthat was basically all of his tendencies.
The box turtle groaned loudly in his room, slamming his whole body on his bed as he screamed into his pillow.
There had to be something he could do instead of just wallowing in his own self pityโฆ
And one of those options could not consist of bothering his family with his random bad mood. They had to put up with him 24/7โฆthe least he could do was give them some space.
The youngest then glanced at his drawing notebook hopefullyโฆ
โฆOne little sketch of something random wouldnโt hurt, right?
The amber eyed teen reached for his notebook, grabbing a pen from his drawer as he started to sketch his desk because why the absolute fuck not? Based on the objects heโs drawn in the pastโฆsketching a simple desk should and will be easy, right? Right.
That was until the orange banded teenโs pencil tip broke. But it was fine! He could just re-sharpen it, right? Right.
That was until the youngest realized he had absolutely no clue where his sharpener was due to the fact his room looked like a pig stie. And there was no way he was looking for it inโฆthat whole situation.
โฆThe situation he created in the first place.
Michelangelo layed on his bed with his face staring at the ceiling in frustration, he ran his fingernails along his arms, not making really deep cuts with them but going deep enough for it to hurt a bit.
Like a reasonable turtle would, Mikey should probably get one of his stress toysโฆor better yet, another pencil!
But letโs be for real hereโฆheโd most likely find a way to fuck that up too.
Suddenly, there was a small, quiet knock on Mikeyโs door butโฆin all honesty? He just wanted to crawl into his shell and sob for the next hour and a half. Letting out a niiiiice and quick 'come in' would take way too much energy.
The box turtle let out a soft grunt, letting whoever was on the other side know it was a-okay to come in.
Abruptly, Leo peeked in the room, a wide smile plastered on his face as he closed the door, โDamn, Mikesterโฆit looks like every single natural disaster went through your roomโฆโ
โIโm cleaning it.โ The youngest grumbled to his brother.
โReally? You sure about that, little bro? Because if my memory serves me correct (which it in-fact does), you said that last week. And the week before thatโฆand the week beforeโโ
โI SAID IโM FUCKING CLEANING IT!!!โ The orange banded turtle snapped, sitting up on the bed to glare at his immediate older brother before slowly realizing what he just did.
The youngestโs heart dropped as he looked away from his brother. The orange banded mutantโs eyed widened as silent and small tears ran down his face. He covered his mouth as his other hand turned to a fist, his nails unforgivingly digging into his palm.
โI-Iโm sorryโฆIโm s-sorryโฆI-Iโm so s-sorryโฆ!โ He started, rocking himself back and forth before stopping as he was met with a warm embrace. Leonardo hugged him gently but firmly, rubbing the otherโs shell in a comforting hold. โWoah woahโฆ! Bud, you have nothing to apologize forโฆโ The slightly older teen said as he rested his chin on the top of his baby brotherโs head.
โL-Like h-hell I donโt. I-I just screamed a-at y-you for no reasonโฆโ Michelangelo wobbly said. โYou were just trying to lighten the mood but I just had to make everything harder like I-I always doโฆ!โ
โMikeyโโ
โI-I always do this. I-Iโm so f-fucking s-sorry Leoโฆโ
โMikesterโฆI-I appreciate the apology but it seriously isnโt necessaryโโ
โYouโre probably so sick of me and so angry at me. I-Iโm sorry I justโโ
โMikey!โ Leo gently yelled to get the otherโs attention, squeezing the smaller turtleโs hands as he stared straight at him with pleading eyes. โDo I look mad?โ
โโฆN-No.โ
โDo I sound mad?โ
โโฆNo.โ
The second youngest sadly smiled, โSo what are you apologizing for, hm?โ
โโฆI-IโฆdunnoโฆI-I justโฆI just felt I needed to apologizeโฆโ The box turtle mumbled as he looked at his hands. The blue banded turtle sighed, slowly getting out of the hug so him and his little brother faced each other. The slider rubbed the other turtleโs palm with his thumb comfortingly, โโฆDo you wanna talk about it, baby bro?โ
The leader in blue was just met with silenceโฆwhich he could honestly work with.
โAngeloโฆyou know you can tell meโฆanything, right? Likeโฆanything. Although, it doesnโt have to be me you talk to about it. It could be Raph or Don or April or even Dad or Draxum! I justโฆdonโt want you sitting here and bottling up the way you feelโฆโ
Silence. Leo continued.
โYouโre always there when we need you, Angel. Whether itโs to vent or to just ramble about shit, youโre justโฆalways there. We donโt tell you this enough but we appreciate you always being someone we can lean onโฆโ
Silence. Leo continued.
โButโฆyou do know you can lean on us too, right? Comfort goes both ways and I can see youโre hurting, buddy. So pleaseโฆif you need to talk to meโฆIโm right here.โ
Mikey sniffled, squeezing Leoโs hand, โI-I d-dunno. Today is justโฆweird. This whole week has just beenโฆweird.โ Leo nodded, giving his brother his full undivided attention, โHow so?โ
โI justโฆhavenโt been able to do anythingโฆโ The smaller teen admitted.
โWhat do you mean?โ The taller teen inquired.
โI havenโt been able to doโฆanything. Like, I canโt draw, cook or even skateboard! Me!!! Not being able to skateboardโ isnโt that crazy?!โ The amber eyed turtle laughed bitterly.
โAnd itโs not like I canโt do it. Iโm perfectly freaking capable of doing it in the right amount of time I want but my brain just. wonโt. let. me!โ
โI keep procrastinating and not doing the stuff I want to do and I have no idea why! Iโm tired of just putting things off and being this way! I want to do things without having to ask you guys for help or to remind me or to relate it with a hyperfixation that I have!โ Mikey hiccuped, a new wave of tears rolling down his face as his hands shook.
The amber eyed teen sniffled, refusing to look at his immediate older brother at all right now becauseโฆholy shit he just overshared a whole lotโฆ
Likeโฆa whoooooooooole freaking lot.
โโฆThat sounds like you.โ Leonardo shrugged.
In a state of just shock and confusion, the box turtle pulled his hands away from his brother, looking up at him as lime green eyes met amber ones. โIโฆwhatโฆ?โ Michelangelo murmured.
โI said that sounds like you.โ Leo said again casually as Mikey glared at him, โYeah. I heard what you said but that isnโt helpful.โ
โIโm just being honest with you, Mikester.โ Leo said, โJustโฆlet me explain, okay?โ
โโฆYou have five minutes before I kick you out of my room.โ
โDeal.โ The lime green eyed mutant commented, โYou canโt draw, cook or skateboard right now. Youโre procrastinating and not doing the stuff you want to do in the time you plannedโฆis that correct?โ
Michelangelo sent deathly daggers to his brotherโ which the other wasnโt phased by at all. This time was probably the best time to crawl in his own shell and just sob his eyes out because what kind of dumbass question was his dumbass brother asking him?!
โโฆYes.โ The orange banded teen mumbled.
โAndโฆwhy are those bad things?โ
โWHY?!โ The box turtle huffed out a laugh of annoyance, โPfftโ youโre asking me why. Maybe itโs because itโs annoying?! Maybe because itโs frustrating to deal with and I donโt want to burden you guys with my problems?! Maybe because I donโt want to fucking feel or be this way?!โ The youngest shouted, breathing heavily as he finished his rant.
The box turtle looked away again, silently cursing at himself for getting annoyed so easily. โMikey.โ Leo started again, โYour being too hard on yourself, okay? No one is expecting you to be at your 100% all the time.โ
โWhat you just described to me; you being able to not focus or you getting bored easily or procrastinating with stuff isโฆliterally you. Youโre just being you.โ The slider explained as he held his baby brotherโs hand in his. โAnd I get it. Itโs hard to deal with it sometimes and itโs going to be hella frustrating. Likeโฆsuper borderline frustrating. But you canโt shun them away and justโฆtry to ignore them, bubsโฆโ
โLetโs take moi for example. Iโm impulsive, I talk loud and lose things daily. Those three things donโt make up my whole personality but it would be super weird and off-putting if I justโฆdidnโt do or have those three things, right?โ
The youngest giggled wetly, โYeahโฆit would. A-And by the way, Iโm still waiting for you to find that glittery pen kit I gave youโฆโ
Leonardo groaned loudly and dramatically, causing the other teen to giggle louder, โIโm looking for it, okay?! Itโs in my roomโฆsomewhere.โ The taller mutant mused, โBut anywaysโฆback to you. You procrastinate, you relate things to your hyperfixations and you canโt do some of your favorite tasks from time to timeโฆthose are some traits that make up you, is it not?โ
Mikey sniffled, rolling his eyes playfully due to the fact he knew damn well where this was going, โYeahโฆโ
Leo smiled softly, seeing his younger brother was starting to get his point, โI wouldnโt change a single thing about you, okay? I know sometimes itโs hard to deal with the things you described but you have us for that.โ He said as his smile turned to a grin.
โYou can come to meโ to usโ anytime. We love you for who you areโฆyour flaws and all and we justโฆI-I need you to know that we love you so so muchโ!โ The slider was cut off by a sudden abrupt embrace from the box turtle. The orange banded teen sobbed into the otherโs shoulder, clutching the taller turtle like a lifeline.
โT-Thank youโฆโ The box turtle wobbly said through tears.
โOf course, Angel.โ Leo said as he hugged his baby brother back, โI love you.โ He said as he kissed the other teen on the head.
โI-I l-love you tooโฆโ
.
.
.
.
.
.
โTell your thoughts to shut up.โ Leo said as he lightly poked Mikey in the forehead numerous times. The two were sitting on the box turtleโs bed just simplyโฆrelaxing and enjoying each otherโs company. Michelangelo was sitting in between his older brotherโs legs as he had his shell to his brotherโs plastron.
Leonardo hugged his brother protectively, resting his chin on the top of the box turtleโs head. โWhat do you mean?โ The youngest giggled out. โI can hear your thoughts, man. Youโre not bothering me or disturbing me in any way, shape or form, alrightโฆ?โ
The amber eyed turtle nodded, squeezing Leoโs hand, โY-YeahโฆI know...โ
โIโm choosing to be here because I love you. I donโt feel obligated to be here, okay? Youโre not annoying and you, neither your problems are a burdenโฆokay?โ The slider said reassuringly, โItโs okay to ask us for helpโฆand we donโt mind reminding you to do thingsโฆokay?โ
โYouโve said โokayโ like, fifty timesโฆโ
โMikey.โ
โMhmโฆyeah yeahโฆI gotchaโฆโ
The elder looked at his brother skeptically, resting his chin on his little brotherโs shoulder so they made solid eye contact, โI want you to say it.โ
โโฆSay what exactly?โ
โI want you to say that you are an amazing person and you donโt need to change a single thing about yourself.โ
โYou are an amazing person and you donโt need to change a single thing about yourself.โ Michelangelo grinned smugly. Leonardo glared at the youngestโs interpretation to his statement, โMikey, you know exactly what I meant.โ
โI said what you wanted me to sayโฆsoโฆโ The amber eyed teen trailed off.
โMichelangelo.โ The slider said in a warning tone as he poked the otherโs side. The box turtle squeaked at the unexpected touch, trying to stop his immediate older brother from doing it again but his brother had a strong but gentle grip on himโฆ
Then the smallest turtle came to recognition that he was stuck in a potential tickle hug with no way outโฆ
โฆHow wonderful.
โL-Leeheeoโฆdoohoo nahat.โ The orange banded mutant warned through his giggles, said warning not seeming too threatening due to the fact he was already laughing up a storm. The leader in blue raised a brow, poking the otherโs side repeatedly, โI just want you to repeat what I saidโฆin the first person.โ The taller teen specified.
The smaller turtle squirmed in the hug, small frantic giggles pouring out of his mouth. Thisโฆreally wasnโt how he was expecting his day to go. Just about an hour ago, he was wallowing in sadness about the stuff he hated about himself, to talking about it with his brother, to now getting tickled by his brother.
โฆSo could he really complain about how things turned out?
โฆYes. Yes, he absolutely could.
โLeeheeon! Plehease dohonโt!โ The youngest squealed as one of his brotherโs hands hovered over his stomach. Mikey held onto the otherโs wrists, trying to stop his elder brother from tickling him but his small attempts ending up to be all for nothing as Leo effortlessly tickled his stomach with one hand.
โLEEHEEHAHAHA!!โ Michelangelo laughed wholeheartedly, swatting at his brotherโs arms. The lime green eyed turtle cooed at the gesture, now using both of his hands to attack the youngestโs plastron, โD'awwโฆlook at you giggling your head off~! Youโre my adorable little bundle of amazingness, arenโt you~?โ
The smaller teen shook his head, a faint blush appearing on his face, โSTAHAโ squeal N-NAHAHA!โ
โWhat~? What was that?โ The blue banded mutant asked as he kneaded the box turtleโs hips. โGYAHAHโ squeal SHIHIHIT! COHOME OHAHAN!!!โ The amber eyed turtle cried frantically as he kicked his legs on the mattress slightly.
The youngest squealed with laughter, curling in on himself as he slumped in his big brotherโs hold. Leonardo just sighed fondly at the action, wrapping the other in another hug as he raspberried his neck. โLEEHEEHEE!! PLAHAHโ squeak NAHAHAT THEHERE squeak PLEHEASE PLEHEASEโ squeak!!!โ
โNot there~?โ The elder lightly mocked, โWhat aboutโฆhere~?โ He mused as he used his hands to scribble all over the younger turtleโs ribs. Mikey cackled, shaking his head to try and at least subside the tickly feelings.
โNAHAHAโ squeal AHAHAHA!! NAHAHAT THEHEHERE EHEโ squeal EHEHEITHER!!! LEEHEEO!!โ The orange banded turtle squeaked as Leo stopped for a second, โIโve tried sooooo many spots, buddy! How many times are you gonna say not there, hm?โ
Mikey genuinely squawked louder than a firefighter siren, squirming so much it looked like he was actually being electrocuted. โPLEHEHAHA LEEHEEO NAHAHAT THEHEHE RIHIHIBS!!!โ He cackled.
โNot the riiiibs~? Why~? Is it because itโs your tickle spot~? Your tickletickletickle spot~? Because youโre ticklish~?โ Leonardo asked as he lightly nibbled the crook of Mikeyโs neck.
Michelangelo screamed in laughter, scrunching up his shoulders as he dug his heels on the bed, a couple of his plushies sadly falling on the floor (R.I.P. manโฆ) โEEEHEEHEEP!!! S-STAHAP BEEHEEING MEEHEAN!โ Mikey said as he thrashed on the bed.
The slider said nothing, his hands sneaking up to the box turtleโs underarms. โAAAAHAHAHA! OHO NOHOHOโ squeak SHIT! SHIHIHAHAT!โ
Happy tears slowly begin to appear in the smallest teenโs eyes, he weakly hit Leoโs arms as a last attempt to be set free, โLEHEHEMME squeal GOHOHOHO!โ
โOhonly if you sahay it, bubs.โ
โIHIHIโ SQUEAK!! LEEHEEHEEON!!!โ
โYeeeees, baby brother~?โ The elder dragged out as he kneaded the otherโs hips.
โIHIโLL SAHAY IHIHAT I-IHIHIโLL SAHAHAY IHIT!!โ The amber eyed teen squealed.
โAnd you promise not to be a sassy little shit about it~?โ The older teen asked.
โSQUEAK YEHAHAHAโ SQUEAK YEHES YEHES I-I PROHOHOMISE!โ
Leo stopped tickling his little brother, hugging him protectively as the youngest caught his breath slowly but surely. โW-Wahaitโฆwhahat squeak wahas ihihat yohou eeheeven wahanted me squeak to sahay again?โ
The taller turtle pondered for a bit, thinking to himself before loudly groaning, โThatโsโฆa good damn question. I donโt really remember exactly what I wanted you to say in the first placeโฆโ The lime green eyed turtle sighed, โForgetfulness at its finest...โ
The red eared slider adjusted himself, making sure the other was comfortable before starting to speak again, โWellโฆbased on what we talked aboutโฆcould you maybe justโฆy'knowโฆโ Leo gestured with his hands before groaning, โDo you get what Iโm trying to say, man?โ
โโฆI thihink I have ahan ideaโฆโ Mikey giggled as he fiddled with his hands, โI shouldnโt beat myself up so much because of some of my traits or quirks. And Iโm allowed to feel frustrated and/or upset because things donโt go my way because of them. ButโฆI shouldnโt allow those things to put me down...โ
Michelangelo smiled softly, rubbing his palm with his thumb, โThey donโt define me as a person but they make me a person. I donโt need to be at my best 100% and Iโm allowed to have bad days. And if things get too overwhelming or difficult I can just go to you guys.โ
Mikey hugged himself, letting out a small laugh as his happy tears welled up in his eyes, โIโm justโฆbeing me. And thereโs nothing wrong with that.โ Leonardo teared up at his brotherโs words, hugging him tighter than he ever had before and burying his face at the back of the youngestโs head.
โNever forget that, Miguelitoโฆnever forget that.โ
ยทฬฉฬฉฬฅอ๏ผ*โขฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*ห๐ต๐ธ๐ฝห*โขฬฉฬฉอโฉโขฬฉฬฉอ*ห๏ผยทฬฉฬฉฬฅอ
(๐ฟ.๐.: ๐ธ๐ ๐ข๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐!!!)
#Rottmnt tickle#Rottmnt tickle fic#Rottmnt tickle fanfiction#Lee!Mikey#Ler!Leo#MWYAHSHSHHSAN#This is actually so silly I love this ๐๐๐#I hope you guys enjoyed the angst ๐คช#ADHDERS AND PPL WITH ADHD TENDENCIES UNITE ๐๐พ๐๐ฉท๐๐๐๐โผ๏ธโผ๏ธโผ๏ธ#Adhd is a bitch ๐คโฆ#Leo can be an asshole at times but he doesnโt mean to I swear ๐ญ๐#My boy just copes with jokes but he has a hard time understanding that not EVERYONE copes like that#So when Mikey snapped at him and started breaking down he was like: โ๐ -> ๐ -> ๐ -> ๐ -> ๐ซขโ#I HATTTEEE forgetting to brush my teeth ๐โฆitโs so damn nasty man#AND NOT BEING ABLE TO DRAW LIKE YOU USED TOโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธ GRAUGHHHH REAL SHIT#I care about these two sm omfg#I need more content with these tWO LOOK AT THEM ๐ฅน๐๐งก!!!#โTell ur thoughts to shut up ๐โ msndhjsjss peak sibling comment#Also I changed my writing style a TEEEEENSY weensy bit if you havenโt guessed#For a whileโฆI havenโt like the **โs I put at the noises that characters made when they laughed :/#Soooo I tried just doing it in italics and AHHUUGHFHS ๐๐๐๐๐๐ฉท๐๐๐#IT LOOKS SM BETTER#I just wanted the laughing to seem more natural#Your just being you guys ๐ซถ๐พ#DONโT BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF PLEASEEEE#Eat some snacks!!! Drink some water/juice!!! Exercise!!!#Your allowed to feel the way you do so just take it easy โบ๏ธ๐๐พ#IโM RUNNING OUTTA TAGS BUT IF ANYONE WANTS TO TALK ABOUT THE BEHIND THE STAGE WORKS ON HOW I MADE THIS I CAN ALWAYS YAP TO YOU ABT IT ๐๐ค๐พ#I donโt think I implied this very well but Leo feels the same way Mikey feelsโฆso thatโs why he was so PERSISTENT on making sure Mikeyโs alr#But Leo take his own advice challenge GO ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธโผ๏ธโผ๏ธโผ๏ธ Maybe a pt. 2 ๐ซข??? Idk yet lolololololol
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I. I love my sillies.

Guysguysguysguys I donโt CAREEEEE if you think itโs unreciprocated NUH UH. I LOVE MY SILLIES IT IS CANON TRUST. ๐ช๐ผ๐ช๐ผ๐ฏ 015 FOREVER ๐
Also ignore the line itโs because of my stupid new(ish) phone
#xfohv#fifteen xfohv#zero xfohv#fifteen x zero#zero x fifteen#editor chats๐ฑ๐ฟ#yapping#*yaps about 015 and fifteen and bfdi*#oh boy do I love xfohv and bfdi
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You called me "Squirt," silly. Remember why? [No.] Oh, Martyโ okay. But you do remember, though, that I used to be left in there for hours, days on end. Completely alone, right? Only โ I was never really alone, was I? Big Brother was always watching. You were always watching, weren't you, Marty? Huh? But... growing boys have certain... needs, shall we say.
THE BOYS 4.04 | Wisdom of the Ages
#sorry this is ugly. long gifs + bad at colouring + i'm not a gifmaker. but this scene is giving me brainworms#definitely adds another layer to 'i can do whatever i want' at the end of s2...#homelander#the boys#theboysedit#the boys gifs#the boys spoilers#cw csa#i guess it's funny to see all the HL apologia from casual viewers following this episode bc everyone should get to 'kill their abusers'#even tho his express purpose for returning to the bad room is stamping out the last vestiges of his humanity. it's not a positive step#his ire is misdirected -- he is not killing them for the abuse but for instilling in him a need for love#for being the last people on earth who know him as 'john.' but his humanity is not at fault for what happened to him!#imp to note also that frank marty & barbara are just extensions of the institution that has dehumanized and abused him all his life#just as vogelbaum and edgar and even madelyn were#and he is still heading back to vought towerโค๏ธ#(yes half the reason i make these sets is so i can yap in peace in the tags)
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