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terrence-silver · 2 years ago

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If Kreese had any children how do you think he would treat his sons compared to any daughters he might have? We've seen that he's all nice and kind towards women and girls but abusive towards guys so I just wondered if he would be the same way towards his own kids

The answer is simple; John Kreese was in the military in the 60's. Yikes!

I think his view and mistreatment of adolescent and teenage boys stems from the army (and the product of the times he was raised in), just like Terry's does. John merely observed boys aged, lets say, 17-19 and above being disciplined, hazed, hardened, put through rigorous, back-breaking training, shouted at by their drill instructors, shouted at by older soldiers, punished, often times beaten for all we know and ultimately tortured, captured, left handicapped, disabled and killed out on the battlefield by the time they would've been ripe enough to graduate out of high-school back home and this became normalized or at least so frequently observed in the war it merely turned into a rite of passage 'a young man goes through to become a real man'. Or a soldier goes through to become an effective combatant, on either side of the conflict. Might've seen Vietcong guerilla men younger even than the youngest soldiers at their base go into suicide mission as young as they come. War and everything you see in a war really changes a man, yes. Terry shares this philosophy. I think this is legitimately why bullying this specific age range target demographic is so frequent for both of them throughout their life. The institutionalized violence against teenagers in the army. They've seen it happen. It happened to them (especially in Twig's case, I bet). They've brought it back home. They did it to others.

Hurt people hurt people.

John Kreese might just feel (young) men are meant to withstand abuse.

Pain.

Anguish.

A good beating or ten, if you will. That's why man is a man.

He is one step away from saying 'When I was your age, I was in Vietnam".

It is not that John thinks women are weak damsels in distress (although, let us be real, for the longest time, he undoubtedly did around the time Betsy was around), but it is just that even when a girl is tough or a fighter, like Tory, John thinks that some things should never change and that men should still be expected to withstand and take hardships just by default of being men. Did this bleed into his treatment of Johnny Lawrence? Yes it did. Would it bleed into how he would treat figurative sons versus daughters? Yeah, probably. It is not that he loves daughters more and sons less, it is just that John loves them extremely differently because his own traumas would've so fundamentally shaped how he views manhood, masculinity, the role of a man, warfare and societal norms, that unfortunately, John has difficulties having a normal approach towards teenage boys even if he truly had it in him to do so. I think the ''gentlest'' he's ever treated a boy who would've been weak is Twig and that is the one anomaly in his philosophy. and which led to possibly the most innately complex relationship and friendship of his life as a result.

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Also, another reason why John Kreese might be so close to being a misandrist; Have we ever considered that he grew up fatherless? With a sick, troubled mother? That he too passed through the societal stigma of coming from a broken, unprotected home lacking an authority figure and someone who would look after him and his mom? It would've been the 1950's and if there's anything worse than a mentally ill woman, it is a husbandless mentally ill woman. Gasp! Now that, is a tragedy, they'd say. People should consider, if we use our galaxy brains, that John's harsh view (and treatment) of men comes from an absentee father too. Before Vietnam. Karate. The cruelty of war. There was his dad who was never there. Men should be able to take a beating, withstand pain, the difficulties of life, they should be hard and strong and macho and heroic and they should take charge and lead; you know, all the things we can reckon that his nonexistent paternal figure never did. Meanwhile, his mother was a present figure, vulnerable and almost hallowed. Betsy was young and died young --- a first puppy love --- taking on the image of a near saint in his eyes.

The answer as to why John is the way John is?

Goes way back to the beginning.

#john kreese #terry silver #kk3 #cobra kai #character analysis #tw; toxic masculinity #tw; institutionalized abuse #tw; the army #dad!john #john kreese as a parent

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theonewiththefanfics · 4 years ago

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Give You Hell (one-shot)

Synopsis: When you’re in a relationship with someone famous while being famous it can be difficult. But not for the Reader and Harry, yet when her past comes knocking, she’ll make sure to know where she stands.

Pairing: Harry Styles x fem!Reader

Genre: fluff, some minor angst, like microscopic

Warnings: swearing, reference to past abusive relationship, but nothing explicit.

Word count: 3428

100% inspired by ‘All American Rejects’’ ‘Gives You Hell’

Dating someone famous while being famous yourself had pros and cons, much like everything in life. The cons mostly came from the outside, not from the inside. It was the opinions of others, thinking what they said mattered, the scrutiny of the press, hoping one of them would mess up, and they could run some bullshit article just so their numbers could go up, without a second thought of how the people involved felt, and it was some jealous fans who didn’t seem to comprehend the people they admired were actual human beings with feelings and thoughts and emotions and autonomy. But other than that, Y/N’s and Harry’s relationship was just like any other. Save for when their emotions bubbled over, millions of people heard them in songs. They’d met at the iconic yellow-suit-Harry Brit awards. She’d been right next to Hugh Jackman opening the show, a red glittering bodysuit with a black and gold ring-master jacket, a top hat adorning her head as she dominated the stage. If Harry had been sloshed at that point (much like he was later on, but who was Y/N to say, given how most of the night was a blur for her), he would’ve absolutely started drooling at the sight of her, and he was one of the thousands who stood up, hollering and clapping as she and Hugh ended their performance.

Much to his dismay though, Y/N wasn’t one of the people assigned to sit by his table, instead, she was a couple of rows behind, whispering something into Billie Eilish’s ear, the two erupting into uncontrollable laughter. He felt like a creep as he tried to catch every possible glimpse of Y/N, her smile making his heart race. She’d been on his radar for a while, had even thought about asking her to collaborate on a song for ‘Fine Line’, but at the end of the day, it was an album of personal discovery (and when one of his producers told him Y/N was halfway across the world in the middle of Norwegian woods for the next half-year working on her own music, he didn’t want to be a bother). But seeing her then, Harry wondered why he hadn’t reached out on his own, especially after at the after-party Lizzo had dragged Y/N to him and introduced the two. The following day, pictures of them dancing together, drinks in hands and drunken grins on their faces would sweep the web, sparking millions of rumours, but, at that moment, they didn’t care, nor did they care about what was written because as Harry twirled Y/N under his arm, as much as the connection was there, that night they went their separate ways. Even when they were drunk, they understood that about the other person, and wouldn’t accept anything else, but a sober and coherent ‘yes’. Sometime midday the next day, Harry reached out to Y/N through a DM on Instagram checking in on how she was doing, which then turned into a six-hour FaceTime call. “What do you mean you’ve never had a hangover?!” Y/N laughed at Harry’s almost offended expression. “I mean I’ve never had a hangover. I’ve never thrown up while drunk or after being drunk, my head’s never hurt – nothing. I mean I’m tired, but that’s because I’m still on New York time and got to bed at like five AM.” “You… are something else.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “Is that something else something good?” Y/N didn’t know, but when Harry saw her eyes sparkle, his heart skipped a beat, and he immediately knew – she was it. “The best.” “Well…” she bit her lip. “If I’m the best, would it be too forward of me to ask you out for a coffee?” What Harry didn’t know was that when she saw him smile as if those were the best news in the world, her heart skipped as well, and she knew he was the one. “Only if it’s my treat.” “But I was the one who asked you out.” “Yes, but you can pay for the second date.” Holding in her squeals of joy was tough, but she raised her eyebrow, giving Harry a sly smirk. “Already so confident there’ll be a second date?” Harry scoffed. “And a wedding!” Seeing Y/N throw back her head as she laughed, made all sorts of butterflies fly through his stomach. “Okay, Styles. I’ll take your word for it.” Three months into the relationship, the two were booked to appear on The Graham Norton show together, which was also the first time they’d appear officially as a couple at a work/outing kind of a setting since the rumours started floating, and a picture of Harry kissing Y/N outside of a hotel room had sort of confirmed that. “So, you two.” Graham pointed between Y/N and Harry with his cards. “Have started to date? Not to say anything Harry, but Y/N… I didn’t think boy-bands were your type.” That made her lean over in laughter as Harry gave everyone a shocked face, before slumping back and pouting, nudging Y/N with his knee. “That’s not funny.” “I mean it kind of is.” “She was twelve when she swore off boy-bands.” Graham nodded, taking a sip of his wine. “Isn’t that what you said last time you were here?” “Hey, it’s been ten years since I said that!” Y/N laughed. “Cut me some slack. All the people I was crushing on are married anyway… with kids… and could probably be my dads… I have issues, don’t I?” Everyone exploded into giggles while Harry shook his head, chuckling. “Love you with all of your issues.” He nudged her shoulder, and she nudged right back, taking a sip of her drink. “Yeah, give it a couple of months. You’ll regret your words.” The thing was Y/N was so wrong, and she’d never been happier to be so wrong. Each morning they were together, Harry woke up to her showering him with kisses or vice versa. As private as Harry was, his Instagram stories were now filled with pictures and small videos of them, of Y/N’s face half-covered by a blanket, glasses crooked as she smushed her cheek to his chest and watched a movie, or her eating breakfast while re-watching old Bones and Castle episodes with captions like ‘dunno how she keeps the food down’ and ‘she swears it’s just for research’, while her feed was full of candid Harry photos or her rummaging through his closet and showing everyone his immaculate style, and giving tips how others can recreate it (also she may or may not just use that as a reason to steal his clothes). Generally, people loved it, and their love for one another. It was refreshing to see them enjoy each other’s company, and not be afraid to do so, especially now, given how it was a couple of days before Y/N ended her tour in New York in Madison Square Garden, to which Harry had specifically flown out for despite being in the middle of filming for ‘The Little Mermaid’. Three AM blinked on the clock, as the two finally drifted off to sleep after five hours of a passionate reunion when her phone dinged, indicating a message had arrived. “Turn it off,” Harry grumbled into the skin of Y/N’s back. “’S too early.” She hummed in agreement, furrowing her brows as her palm blindly searched for the offending device, and she squinted her eyes as the light burned her retinas before widening in shock at the message. Harry felt her body go rigid, and he pressed a kiss to her neck. “Everythin’ alright, lovie?” “Uh – “ she stuttered, trying to process the words on the screen. “Uh, yeah. Yes, everything’s fine. Just… some last-minute changes for the show. They want something really big for the ending, and some of the propositions are just…” She could feel a smile stretch across Harry’s mouth. “Extravagant?” “You could say that, yeah.” “Sounds like it’s gonna be one hell of a show. Not that the others weren’t.” Y/N switched the phone off wiping away the message first and then turned to cuddle into Harry’s chest. “It most certainly will.” For the next two days, she was an anxious ball of mess, as her crew got everything ready, and her and her band rehearsed relentlessly before she asked all of them to gather at the studio to add a song to the setlist. “It’s gonna be a couple more hours, Hazza,” Y/N murmured into the phone as Harry had called in to check on her. “ ‘M sorry. You don’t have to wait up for me. I know you’re still adjusting to New York time.” “ ‘S alright,” he slurred, clearly already falling asleep but determined not to. “Can’t sleep without you anyway.” At those words, Y/N’s heart did that stupid flipping thing it’d been doing ever since Harry entered her life to stay, and a shy grin blossomed on her lips. “You’re exhausted, sweetheart. But I’ll tell you what - if you do go to bed, I’ll be sure to wake you up with a kiss when I get back.” “You promise?” She could hear the smile on his face. “Swear it.” “Alright, lovie. I’ll be waiting to cash in on that kiss.” “I’ll run to give it to you as soon as I can. G’night.” “See ya’ in a bit.” Y/N let out a shudder as she heard the call disconnect. She entered back inside the studio and clapped her hands, drawing the attention of her producers and band members. “Where were we?”

***

The hour before a show was always nerve-wracking for Y/N. It’s when the adrenaline truly started to rush, when her feet and palms got all tingly, and her ears and cheeks heated up. It was when their warm-up band exploded on stage, and the crowd got pumped up. But the best moment that night by far was right when she was about to run out, Harry had pulled her back by the wrist and kissed the living daylights out of her. “You’re gonna kill it tonight,” he muttered against her lips, words skimming her mouth and making her smile as bright as the sun. She seemed to do that a lot around him. It’s why he now dedicated Golden to her every time he sang it. “Thank you. For being here.” Harry flicked her nose. “Always. Now go. People are waiting.” When Y/N finally appeared on stage, pretty much glowing as brightly as the stage lights, her fans went wild, and even more so when she jumped, starting off the show. The whole time, her gaze flitted to backstage just to get a glimpse of Harry, and whenever she did, she saw him dancing, singing along, filming her having fun and some clips of himself as well, going absolutely ham to her songs. As the night was moving towards the end, usually, she’d feel euphoria from giving a great performance, after hearing thousands of people sing her songs in unison, now Y/N felt closer to throwing up and fainting. “So uh…” She pushed back strands of sweaty hair, hollers of people echoing in her head. “This is a very special show tonight. Umm… this is the first concert my boyfriend’s come t - .” She didn’t even get to finish the sentence before the cheers of the people interrupted her, deafening the girl even with the earplugs. “But umm… it’s also a special show because two days ago someone reached out to me, and uh… he… well, he was as important of a person once the same way Harry is right now, and he wrote this.” Y/N went over to where the piano chair was, lifted it and fished out her phone from it, revealing the message that’d been basically haunting her nights and days since receiving it. “Breaking up with you was the biggest mistake I ever made.” To her own surprise, her voice was steady and sure, unlike her hands which were trembling like leaves in a storm. “I know you look happy and in love, but I know it’s not true. I’ve known you for five years, I know how to see through the mask you put on every day just to make sure others are happy while you yourself suffer an inauthentic life. But you do deserve to be happy. And I’ll be waiting for you if you decide to give us a chance again. I’ll be at your concert in Madison Square.” She looked out into the crowd. “You wrote a song once for me. If you sing it, that’s how I’ll know you feel the same.” By the time she got to the end, there were no more shouts or screams, but confused murmurs. Y/N let out a shuddering breath, hoping that she could manage to do what she wanted, and everything didn’t fall apart. “The thing is, I’d like for Harry to come on stage, please.” She could see the fear in his eyes as he jogged to stand next to her, but he disguised it with an overenthusiastic smile as he waved over towards the raging sea of people. He’d seen the message, had seen her reread it more than fifty times by that point, and as sure as he was in their relationship, when someone who held such importance, no matter if good or not, in someone’s life came knocking again, you could never be too sure what would happen. Harry didn’t want to say anything, believing if it was important enough, she’d tell him. Guess that was it. “So, uh…” Y/N pulled Harry’s arms over her shoulders and grasped onto them, grounding them both. “This is for you.” Y/N looked over into the crowd before glancing over her shoulder, Y/E/C eyes meeting Harry’s wavering green ones. “And you,” she whispered so that only he could hear. “Hope you know I mean everything.” As the cords started playing, she felt Harry unwarp his arms from where she’d been holding them over her shoulders and a smile erupted on her face. “I wake up every evening,” Y/N sang, “with a big smile on my face, and it never feels out of place.” “And you’re still probably workin’,” Harry’s voice joined in, grin as wide as the Cheshire cat’s, as he now had a microphone in hand, the other placing earplugs in his own ears, “at a nine-to-five pace… I wonder how bad that tastes.” “When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell,” the two harmonized, Y/N’s eyes locked onto the masses, imagining the face of her ex-boyfriend who had the audacity to send that message. “When you walk my way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell.” Harry was looking at the crowd as well, now fully understanding the message and the person behind it, and although he lived by ‘treat people with kindness’, he couldn’t help but gloat at the fact he got to sing with the love of his life on stage, and basically serenade a break-up song to a person who didn’t know how to appreciate what he’d had. Y/N cocked her head to the side. “Now, where’s your picket fence, love, and where’s that shiny car? It didn’t ever get you far. You’ve never seemed so tense, love. I’ve never seen you fall so hard. Do you know where you are?” It was hard not to smile, knowing where she was and who she was with. Harry threw an arm over Y/N’s shoulders as she sang, giving a mock sad look, while Harry pouted. “And truth be told, I miss you… And truth be told, I’m lying!” “When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell! When you walk my way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell! When you find a gal that’s worth a damn and treats you well.” Y/N pointed towards where she imagined her ex was standing. “Then she’s the fool, you’re just as well, hope it gives you hell! Hope it gives you hell!” For a split second, the music slowed down, guitar strumming in the air, as Harry pulled Y/N by the palm and towards his chest. When the next lyrics came out of his mouth, he knew them to be true as he sang them to the man, he’d heard Y/N talk about, to the man who thought everything he’d done to her, every horrible word and deed was justified, to the man who thought breaking someone else down was the only way to bring themselves up. “Now tomorrow you’ll be thinking to yourself, where did it all go wrong, but the list goes on and on.” “And truth be told, she misses you,” Harry hummed, Y/N letting out a large laugh, holding onto his bicep, as he slightly changed the lyrics. “And truth be told, she’s lying! When you see her face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell! When you walk her way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell! When you find a gal that’s worth a damn and treats you well.” Harry sighed, shrugging his shoulders. “Then she’s the fool you’re just as well hope it gives you hell.” “Now you’ll never see,” Y/N took over the song. “What you’ve done to me.” She placed a hand over her heart. “You can take back your memories, they’re no good to me. And here’s all your lies, you can look me in the eyes, with that sad, sad look that you wear so well.” She dragged her finger down her cheek, giving a pout while Harry mimicked her stance before turning the mic to the audience. “When you see my face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell,” the crowd sang back with such vigour, Y/N was sure the whole ground was shaking just from their voices, and the clapping and stomping to the drum rhythm would bring the whole world down. “When you walk my way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell! When you find a gal that’s worth a damn and treats you well, then she’s the fool you’re just as well, hope it gives you hell!” The two were jumping around the stage like madmen, adrenaline filling their veins. “When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell!” “Hope it gives you hell!” Everyone else repeated. “When you walk my way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell!” “Hope it gives you hell!” “When you sing this song and sing along, well you’ll never tell. Then you’re the fool, I’m just as well, hope it gives you hell!” Y/N grinned once more, placing her hand over her heart, meaning every word – she was just as well. She had amazing friends, a career that’d flourished, and a person who loved her more than words could describe. “When you hear this song, I hope that it will give you hell!” Harry crooned down the mic, knowing their happiness would, Y/N’s happiness would give him hell. And he enjoyed it, knowing how good her life was. “You can sing along I hope that it puts you through hell!” Her voice became the only sound as the last word echoed around everyone, her chest heaving up and down from the exertion, from all of the emotions running through her body as well as the overwhelming feeling of not only having Harry watch her perform but to end up performing with him. When his hands wrapped around her body, it startled her out from the daze, and the popping confetti startled her even more, as the rest of her band joined the two to take their bows, grins on all of their faces while they did so. “Not the song you thought I’d sing, is it?” Y/N laughed into the mic, Harry’s arms tightening around her waist. “There’s a reason I blocked your number, let alone you from my life. Don’t think I won’t do it again.” “But I would like to say thank you, to the asshole in question,” Harry said, making Y/N’s forehead scrunched up. “You let go of the best person ever; you had the honour of calling yourself her boyfriend, but instead, you chose to walk away. So, thank you for that. Because now I’ll have that honour and pleasure for the rest of our lives.” Yeah. It was one hell of a show.

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take):

Everything tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64 @supernaturalbaesduh @breezy1415 @crazy--me @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sea040561 @staryeyedgirl @deathbyarabbit @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91 @dalilx @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns @averyrogers83 @in-the-end-im-still-trash @gallifreyansass @dewy-biitch @avxgers @unlikelygalaxygiver @magicwithaknife @ollyoxenfrees @bnhvrdy @tvwhoresblog @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl @sj-thefan @teenwolflover28 @lestersglitterglue @im-squished

Harry Styles tags: @sarcasticallywitty15 @breezykpop @girlboss99 @harrystylesdoesntknowiexist @alliyjane @sirtommyholland

A/N: I love ‘All American Rejects’ and have been listening to ‘Gives You Hell’ non stop. It’s the best break-up song ever, and you won’t convince me otherwise.

P.S. my tags are always open :)

P.S.S. please don’t repost my work on other platforms without my explicit written permission. reblogs are fine :)

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rose-scent-and-vodka-lime · 4 years ago

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Moments - Merle Dixon x Reader

Summary: You and Merle are taking care of Daryl while you two are living together after you two graduated highschool. As you wake up on night noticing Merle is not at your bedside.

Contains: Big Brother Merle / Slight mention of abuse / YN & Merle acting as parents

Characters: YN x Merle Dixon / Daryl Dixon

Also: First time ever attempting to write something like this, let me know if you liked it <3

As I slowly opened up my eyes, having to adjust a bit to the darkness in our bedroom. I noticed a faint light taking over the darkness in the room. While looking at my side I noticed Merle’s place on the bed was empty. That’s strange Merle came to bed a while ago after you had just put Daryl to bed after a long day at school. Daryl still had a bit of trouble adjusting tot his new lifestyle, it was strange for him to come home after school and to have dinner together as a family. Or to be woken up before going to school, and getting ready to have breakfast like a normal family. I’ll never forget the first time I made Daryl some pancakes for breakfast, he could barely react as he stared at the plate of pancakes infront of him. He was silent for a while afterwards untill I heard a soft sob coming from his place at the table. He was crying because I made him some pancakes. As soon as Merle came into the dining room and aknowledged the situation his facial expressions changed. It was like he had never seen his little brother so sad before. It hit him that his little brother was also subjected to the cruel words and actions of their own father. The man who was supposed to love them and raise them to be better men.

I got up from my side of the bed and put on the lamp standing on the desk. `Well damnit, I forgot this lamp is way to bright at night.` shot through my mind as I squinted my eyes while making my way towards the door. Walking down the hall towards the stairs I started to be able to hear some noises more clearly. They seemed like regular living noises. However the only voice that I could clearly recognize was Merle’s. His way of laughing was one in a million. If you where ever to loose Merle in a crowd you could easly recognize his voice by the way he either laughed or yelled. Slowy walking down the stairs, I am trying to be as quiet as possible, as not to startle him.

The room filled with more noise, as I looked around I noticed Merle sitting on the couch watching the flintstones cartoon on a VHS while next to him was laying Daryl, fast asleep tucked in a blanket holding Merle’s other arm. “So what did I miss?” I asked as Merle turned around smiling softly at me putting his fingers towards his lips and point to a sleeping Daryl next to him. “Not much, but he is finally asleep now babe.” He tried to say as softly as possible not wanting to wake Daryl. “Is Daryl ok? Does he have a fever? Or is he sick?” I asked worried as I looked at a sleeping Daryl next to his big brother. “He had a nightmare, he thought dad would come and take him back to his place because he dropped the plate earlier at dinner.” “Poor kid didn’t wanna wake me up or bother me, so he came downstairs and put in a VHS. That’s what I heard a while later.” He said calmly while softly stroking Daryls hand which was tightly gripped around his other arm. “Ohdear.” I said while looking at them. All I could think of was how painfull it must’ve been for Merle. To have his own little brother being scared of telling someone he could trust. “ Y/N I’m so glad we took him out of that shitstorm. I didn’t want him to end up as someone, like me yaknow.” Merle said quietly while swallowing the last few words. “Hey… Merle” I said as I walked closer to him and sat next to him on the couch, holding his hand as we looked into eachothers eyes. “Honey… You are not some evil person, or a bad person like your father. What he did to you, does define you are make you any less of a person.” I stared into Merle’s blue eyes while he leaned in to slowly give me a gentle kiss, stroking my hand. “Y/N I know that, however I may act like i’m one tough son of a bitch. But deep down inside i’m so scared that I turn out just like him.”

Merle was so scared of becoming a man like his father, hurting others who didn’t even deserve it. That was one of the reasons why he wanted Daryl out of that house, to make sure he couldn’t break his little brother. Like he did with him. Ever since their mother died it was the two of them against the world, against their own father who would hit them, beat them, humiliate them. And as a way to regain power Merle began to act out. Not giving a crap what others thought but deep down inside he did, however no one stayed long enough for him to open up and show it. It took me a while to get him to trust me, to even believe me when I told him that I loved him. God, I still remember the first time we spend the night together, after that night the way he kissed me was different, it was like he could be himself. Like his home away from home. He still could be a little asshole sometimes, in the way he’d tell jokes or make comments to others. But at the same time he reacted in a way as he never did before.

“Let’s have a sleepover in the living room tonight. I think if we bring Daryl back to his room we’ll wake him up. And the poor kid needs his sleep.” I said softly while looking at Daryl still fast asleep. Even thought I wasn’t his mother Daryl did feel a bit like my son. Merle nodded and smiled soft as I put my head against his shoulder, snuggling up against him. “Y/N I love you.” Merle said while pressing down a soft kiss on my head. “I love you to babe.” I replied while closing my eyes, thinking of many more moments to like this to come into the future. As Merle and I slowly drifted off falling asleep.

#twd #amc #amc the walking dead #the walking dead #Dixon Brothers #thewalkingdead #Merle Dixon #Merle #Twd merle #twd merle dixon #Merle twd #Daryl Dixon #Daryl dixon twd #twd daryl #twd daryl dixon #daryl twd #reader x merle dixon #merle dixon x reader #twd imagine

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1337wtfomgbbq · 3 years ago

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Let's see if I can't disprove the whole „John beat Dean“ bullshit that this fandom still spews because of 'Bad Boys'.

First the misconception that people still seem to cling to, that Dean couldn't have been fighting a werewolf because the first werewolf they met was Madison in 'Heart'.

Season 2, Episode 17 'Heart' Dean said this:

„I’m sorry, man, but what about “a human by day, a freak animal killing machine by moonlight” don’t you understand? I mean, werewolves are badass. We haven’t seen one since we were kids.“

Season 4, Episode 13 'After School Special' we have this exchange:

„Mr Wyatt: Oh, no, it's not about the fight, Sam. You know this assignment was nonfiction, right?

Young Sam: Yes, Mr. Wyatt.

Mr. Wyatt: So you and your family killed a werewolf last summer, huh? Why would you write something like this, Sam?

Young Sam: It doesn't matter. As soon as my Dad gets back, we're leaving, so you can flunk me if you want to.“

How old was Young Sam in the After School Special? They get to Truman High in November of 1997, which would make Sam 14 and Dean 18 at that time.

Sam said in his essay that they killed the werewolf in the previous summer, which would be summer of 1996.

The episode Bad Boys, in which Dean tells Sonny the bruises on his arns were due to a werewolf, takes place in 1995.

Some would say, 'Haha all your calculations and you still can't prove John wasn't an abusive piece of shit. Haha!'

To you I raise you this. So we're not gonna take Dean's word in this situation? The Dean that loves to fuck with people and be frank and burst their bubble of a normal fucking world.

And I'm sorry, but I actually looked into the episode. Yeah, that's right, I went into the fuck up that was season 9 and looked at it myself. And I have to say, those bruises are exactly the shape of bruises the clawed hand of a werewolf would leave behind. It don't look like the hand marks of a human being.

And so what if it doesn't align with the continuity of the 'After School Special'. Sam himself doesn't remember this happening, which doesn't discredit Dean's memory or what he said.

There is nothing in this episode that gives credance to the claim that John did this. Heck, The way the Deputy describes Dean's arrest, his mood and the fact that he has a shiner, courtesy to Dean, makes it more believable that the bruises are due to the Deputy.

Heck, I got finger shaped bruises from a friend when we were shitfaced and she grabbed my arm too tightly, and they looked nothing like what Dean had.

I went into my laptop and found it:

If you look up 'bruises from being grabbed' you see how you get spots of bruising from the fingertips, maybe two or three bruises that looks like fingers, but nothing as distinct as what Dean had in 'Bad Boys'.

I rewatched 'Heart' to see if maybe Madison grabbed one of them, but nah she just throws them around. She grabs her own arm however:

Sorry for the bad quality, but this proves that a werewolf can grab a person WITHOUT injuring them with their claws in the process, as some of you like to claim.

And then I remembered... Someone, not sure if it was Jensen or JDM or whoever, said in a tweet that the bruises were from a werewolf. And with the help of @john-winchesters-only-simp I found it.

It was Adam Glass:

Who is Adam Glass you may ask. Well, he just so happens to be a writer on supernatural. One of the episodes he wrote was 'Bad Boys'. Not only him however, no, none other than Kripke himself was the second writer on that episode. The Kripke that was on the show since season one and who knows how Jeffrey Dean Morgan intended John to be portrayed.

So we got Dean in the episode saying it was a werewolf, and Glass, who wrote the episode, saying it was a werewolf. Conclusion: IT WAS A FUCKING WEREWOLF.

Now let's look at John in this episode, because I know how yall love John.

And before you all come running and crying 'he still left Dean in the boys home for two months WAH WAH'. That's what's called tough love. Aren't you the same people that always use the fact that John was born in 1954 to justify all your little headcanons where he's racist, and homophobic and anti hippie?

Dean himself says: „Yeah. I made the mistake. Look, I know how you think. None of this was Dad's fault.“ (9x7) Dean himself acknowledges that none of this was his fathers fault and all his own fault. John told Sam that Dean disappeared on a hunt, but Dean explains that he lost the food money John left them after losing a card game. Knowing that Sam would get hungry, Dean attempted to rob a convenience store, but was ultimately arrested, and sent to a boy's home.

So, Dean gambles away the food money he got from John and has to resort to robbing a convenience store. None of which is John's fault, all of which is Dean's fault.

Deputy Billy: „Well, his old man called. (Young Dean looks up.) Once he found out what happened, he said let him rot in jail. (Young Dean looks down at his knees.) Judge is off on a fishing trip. Boy's too young to leave in County. So we thought it best he stay here till arraignment.“ (9x7)

Let's unpack this:

First off, the: „he said let him rot in jail,“ could've easily been ad-libbed by Deputy Billy seeing how pissed he was at that moment about how Dean gave him a shiner. And even if John said that, yall do understand what must've been going through John's mind do you. You get called by the police that your son, who you left in charge of your youngest, with enough money to last them for the duration of your hunt, just got arrested for attempting to rob a convenience store. Like, there would've been some choice words from me too.

And you do understand how lucky Dean got. The Judge is out on a fishing trip and so Dean was unable to have a 'detention' hearing and Deputy Billy decided to put him with Sonny, who also managed to get the charges dropped.

That took them one month, and John likely knew the charges got dropped. But for John it's not only the stealing, it's gambling away the money he gave Dean to feed Sam. That's why he left him there for one month more. He was also hunting a rugaru during that time, he could've easily seen this as a way safer place to keep Dean as anything else.

Sure, John getting Dean before the school dance was a bit of a dick move but he is right, they got a job. And Dean left immediately once he saw Sam showing that for Dean, too, the job comes first.

Plus, to John this was punishment not something to reward Dean in the end too.

Look, guys, I'm not even mad at this point.

This fandom hears Dean saying: „Yeah, sorry again, pal. I don't play for your team,“ (6x5) after being called pretty by a man.

Or Dean in season 2, episode 9 going: „Well, you are a handsome devil, but I don't swing that way, sorry,“ after being asked by an officer to step out of his car.

I mean, I get how those quotes and the lighting and the plaid patterns and the lamp all mean that Dean wants to suck Cassipu's dingdong. I get reading in between the lines. And I know yall drink paint that messes with your brain, I get it.

I get picking and choosing canon. Heck, I do it too. Most days I disregard everything after season 5, and pretend the show ended with ‘Swan Song’.

And I also get that most of you have daddy issues, we all know that. Heck, this fandom could be renamed: 'that fandom with the most daddy issues' and we would still all know who we're talking about.

TLDR: Sam and Dean hunted werewolfs befor ‘Heart’ and Madison wasn’t the first werewolf they met. The bruises in 'Bad Boys' are irrevocably caused by a werewolf not John.

#supernatural #spn #john winchester #dean winchester #sam winchester #john winchester defense #john winchester defense squad #facts don''t care for your feelings #I gotta drop some canon on you

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thatshithurted8 · 4 years ago

Text

Out Of Character

Summary: In which JJ and the Pogues are left confused as to why you ran off with Barry’s money, but their worry only increases when they find you in a brand new hot tub at John B’s.

Hey! I have another idea for a Jj imagine. What if the reader and jj are dating and instead of jj in the hot tub scene it’s the reader because her mom is abusing her. Requested by: @joshy-obx

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: Mention of physical/verbal abuse, panic attack and injuries.

Every member of the Pogues had their own respective roles, which made the group click so well. Kie was the mom of the group, always scolding the boys for doing something stupid while simultaneously giving out amazing advice. Pope was the smart and logical one, and despite him being the only one out of the group with a promising future he would do anything for his friends. John B was seemingly the leader of the five teenagers and he was known as being strong willed. He could get things done no matter what the risks were. JJ was the smart ass, but also the one who always got the group into trouble. No one could really relax around JJ as he was always causing trouble. And lastly there was you. Your role in the group was being the strong and optimistic one. When things got rough you were always the first one to look at the bright side, in fact none of the Pogues have ever seen you cry.

So when you seemingly acted on pure impulse and adrenaline the rest of the Pogues were shocked and at a lack of words seeing you get defensive for stealing Barry’s money, causing you to ultimately run off with it. It wouldn’t be until later that night that they would understand the reasoning behind your actions.

When you ran off naturally the Pogues searched for you since you were acting so out of character. However, JJ was the most worried. You two have been dating for the past year and have been friends for the last five. Over the years you and JJ have gotten extremely close so it alarmed him to see you act out.

The four remaining Pogues plus Sarah all split up to look for you. Sarah and John B went together while Pope and Kie went off on their own as well. JJ went off by himself, making sure to check every spot he knew you would go to like where you guys went on your first date or where JJ would find you after you had a rough day at home and you needed to clear your head. Despite the groups efforts they couldn’t find you.

Obviously JJ wasn’t going to give up on looking for you, but he hadn’t eaten since breakfast that morning so he found himself walking up to the chateau. As he steps foot on the property the whole yard is illuminated by fairy lights strung throughout the trees.

He furrows his eyebrows in confusion, none of that stuff was there when they left this morning. The blonde rounds the corner and his heart drops when he sees you sitting in a brand new hot tub.

“Y/N?” He calls out while walking over to you, his hunger being completely forgotten.

“Yoo I’ve been waiting for you to get here!” You exclaim as your eyes fall onto your boyfriends figure.

“What is all this?” The blonde asks reaching the hot tub while looking around at his surroundings.

“I decided to get something nice for my family for once.” You slur. JJ looks around the hot tub and notices beer cans in the cup holders and some were even floating in the warm water.

“Y/N you can’t be serious right? You stole money from a drug dealer and spent it on a fucking hot tub! He’s going to kill you.” JJ stresses, but you simply roll your eyes.

Just as JJ was about to open his mouth to give you another lecture your attention moves to find the sound of a car door being shut. A smile appears on your face when you see your best friends Kie and Pope start to walk over to you two after Kie locked the car.

“Hey what’s up guys!” You exclaim raising your arms above your head like a referee calling a field goal.

“What the hell Y/N?” Kie asks as her and Pope make it over to JJ’s side who had his arms crossed over his chest and a furrow deep in his brow. Pope and Kie looked at JJ confused, but he only answered with a shrug, he was out of the loop as much as they were.

“I was hoping you guys would be coming! Hey look at this.” You say pressing a few buttons causing a disco ball above you that none of the Pogues noticed before to start spinning and the jets in the hot tub to splash upwards.

You furrow your eyebrows in confusion when your friends don’t look amazed by the cool features in front of them. With that being said you really wanted to impress them and have them join you so with a swig of your beer you start to press random buttons hoping something cool would happen.

“What the hell did she do?” Pope asks turning to JJ.

“I don’t know man it was like this when I got here.”

Kiara turns around to try and convince you to get out of the hot tub so they can understand what the hell happened and why you seemingly had a breakdown, but the sound of the screen door opening and closing causes you all to look over at the chateau. Your younger brother and sister run down the steps of the porch and race each other to the hot tub. This only causes JJ, Pope and Kie to become even more confused. It was a known fact that you didn’t allow the two kids to be out this late. After all you’ve been practically raising them since you were ten.

“Y/N our movie finished can we come in?” Your brother Braxton asks dipping his hand into the warm water while your sister, Moira gave you puppy dog eyes.

“Of course!” You exclaim while giggling, causing your siblings to turn around and race back into the chateau giggling, to get changed into their bathing suits.

“Uh Y/N shouldn’t they be in bed?” Kie asks once the rambunctious kids were back inside and out of ear shot.

“Who cares? My mom and step dad don’t and my dad doesn’t either so why should I?”

“What do you mean your dad doesn’t care?” JJ asks, the last time he checked your dad was living on the main land with your step mom and you guys were welcome to stay with him when ever.

You simply roll your eyes and take another gulp of beer before throwing the now empty can somewhere in the yard. “I was going to ship Brax and Mo off to see my dad.” You slur while saying your siblings nicknames.

“But when I called him all I got was voice mail. He says that we can come and visit when ever, but he doesn’t mean it. He’s too happy with his new family and we’d just ruin everything.” You recall sitting back into the warmth and jets of the tub while allowing your legs to float up, your toes poking out of the water.

“Who cares right? Now we have this sick hot tub!”

“You could’ve still got them plane tickets!” JJ exclaims, Kie cutting him off right after, “Or you could’ve donated the money to literally any charity!”

“Or even give Barry the money back, he’s going to kill us you guys!” Pope stresses looking at everyone in the group.

Annoyed with your boyfriend’s and best friends critiques to your actions you stand up quickly, water falling off of your body. “Well I didn’t okay! I spent the money on something my friends - no something my family can enjoy so if you guys are going to keep on judging me and my fucking decisions then leave!”

Chills run up JJ’s spine at your speech and how your torso looked when you finally stood up. Along your stomach, especially around your rib cage were dark bruises and a few cuts. As Kie and Pope realize the damage done to your body as well, the yard falls silent except for the sound of crickets and the hot tubs jets.

“Y/N.” JJ says softly stepping closer to the edge of the hot tub. He was filled with anger, knowing exactly who did this to you, but all he wanted to do was comfort you the same way you do when he endures a beating.

Neither you or JJ notice Kie and Pope scurrying to the chateau’s porch to bring Braxton and Moira back inside who just came back out, clad in their swim suits.

“It’s fine J.” You say, tears welling up in your eyes.

Your boyfriend kicks off his boots and socks before stepping into the hot tub, not caring that his cargo shorts and the contents in the pockets were now wet. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you towards your chest. Once your cheek makes contact with his shirt you let the emotions that you have held in for so long out.

JJ knew your home life wasn’t ideal, but he didn’t know it was this bad. You have always been so strong. Even when he would meet you at your special spot in the boneyard when you were having a rough night you never even implied that you were getting physically abused. Yes, he knew your coked up mom and step dad were both verbally abusive which was still horrible he had no idea things have gotten physical. A part of JJ felt as if he let you down since he had no inkling as to what was happening to you when you were at home, causing a part of his heart to break especially knowing you have been there bandaging up his cuts and scrapes from his father while your own bruises and injuries were healing themselves.

“I just wanted to be a good sister for once and get them out of there, but it didn’t work nothing ever works.”

“Hey hey look at me.” JJ says pulling back and holding your face in his large hands. “You are a great sister to Braxton and Moira. Without you they would have nothing. You are the best thing that has happened to them and they love you so much.”

You simply look into your boyfriends eyes with tears falling down your face. Seeing you like this made JJ’s heartache. “You know that right?” He asks to make sure since you didn’t look too convinced from what he said.

In all honesty you knew how much your siblings valued and loved you, but life was tough. You never signed up to be Moira’s and Braxton’s primary caregiver, especially at such a young age. Nonetheless you had to do what you had to do, you had to play with the cards you were dealt. However, at this point you were so tired. So tired of playing mom, balancing school, searching for the gold and being the brunt of the physical and verbal abuse from your mom and step dad. You wanted to give up, but the way JJ looked at you made you realize that you couldn’t.

Nodding your head yes you let out another sob before pulling JJ closer to you.

JJ walks out of his bedroom where you were currently sleeping, and he makes sure to close the door behind him quietly. He walks down the hallway into the living room where he found Kie, Pope, John B and Sarah. The rooms atmosphere felt tense as all the teenagers were concerned and worried for you.

The blonde was successful in calming you down and getting you out of the hot tub after your emotional moment. He ran you a bath and bathed you while your body continued to tremor from the after shock of your panic attack. While he dried you off and bandaged your injuries John B and Sarah returned, confused as the other Pogues just an hour before. Kie explained to the couple what happened as Pope tiptoed out of John B’s room where Braxton and Moira were sleeping, he just got them to fall asleep.

“How is she?” Sarah asks quietly, worry evident all over her face once she see’s JJ walk into the room. The rest of the Pogues look up at the blonde expectantly.

“She’s as good as she can be right now.” JJ says quietly while walking over to the screen door where his boots were. The four teenagers watch him as he slips them on.

“Where are you going?” John B asks.

“If Y/N wakes up tell her I’ll be back soon.” JJ says ignoring John B’s question before opening the door and walking down the steps of the front porch.

JJ was going to make sure that your step dad and mom never laid a finger on you or your siblings ever again.

Question of the day: What is your “role” in your friend group?

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beclynn-herondale · 4 years ago

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Chapter 1 of TSC x B99 Au

B99 belongs to it's rightful owners and tsc and the characters belong to Cassandra Clare.

Jace was walking up to his desk and he noticed Clary was very concentrated on her computer, he decided to flick a rubber band at her.

“What the hell Herondale,” she said

“Well I guess I got another score,” he said and winked

She rolled her eyes

"We have work to do," she said.

"Do we have a case?" He asked

"Yes, a electronic store was rubbed," said Clary.

"Well let's go partner," Jace said and winked

"I dislike you so much," she said

"You know you love me."

"No, not everyone loves you Herondale," she said and walked to the elevator.

She is in a mood today I see, maybe I should cheer her up, but I would look suspicious than.

______

Clary and Jace were sadly partners, she didn't enjoy it and he assumes she likes him, yeah whatever, he's beautiful but like whatever.

Her mom got a call from her abusive father and Clary has been worried about her mother and sisters and her step father, she wonders why that asshole can't just leave them alone, he took her big brother away so hasn't he done enough?

They pulled up to the electronic store and got out.

"They got hit pretty bad," Jace said

"Yeah," she answered

When they went in to ask the owner questions, Jace was messing with so many things, honestly why did he have to act like a child?

"Sorry about my partner," she said. "He doesn't know how to act like an adult."

"I know, I just prefer to have fun," Jace said

She rolled her eyes

"Do you by chance have any footage of the break in?" Clary asked the owner

"No, they knocked them all out," said the store owner.

"Oh Clary!," Called Jace

She went over to him

"Look," he said. "There's a camera in this duck."

He threw it at her as if it were toxic or something, he always got strange around ducks.

"You're right," she said.

______

They went through the footage and after a couple more days of work they found the bad guys and put them in jail

Jace wondered if they could improve their system of the way the handle certain suspects but not all of them wanted things to change. Jace wanted to make a difference though.

"We're getting a new Captain today," said Clary as she sat at her desk.

"I heard," he answered

"Why do you seem disappointed?," she asked.

"Cause our old Captain was good," he said

"What!, No he was terrible, and you only liked him cause he let you off the hook for many things," she said

He sighed

The elevator door opened then, and Jace was not prepared for who their new Captain was.

"Hello everyone, I am Alexander Lightwood, I am your new Captain," said Alec

And Jace knew him, his best friend, until they lost a little touch after Alec went to L.A. to do work in another place.

He looked over at Izzy who was just as shooketh as him, Alec is her big brother and it looks like he didn't tell her either.

Alec walked by to his new office, without even looking at Jace or Izzy

"Now," he said. "I want you all to get back to work."

"He's so cool," said Clary.

Magnus walked up and said "Did anyone else get the gay vibe?"

Magnus wasn't wrong, Alec was gay, he came out to Jace and Izzy back in highschool, they supported him and said if anyone said or did anything to him they would beat them up, Jace and Izzy were 15 then.

"J-Bear try not to look shocked," said Magnus

"Magnus, that's Alec," he said

"Oh damn, that piece of good looking was your best friend back in the academy?" Magnus said.

"Yeah, we were like brothers until he left to go to school somewhere else," Jace said

Izzy came over

"Jace, he didn't tell me either and I am so pissed, how could he just not tell me? I am his damn sister for crying out loud," said Izzy

She was quick to anger at times, but Jace understood her anger now.

"Oh damn, that's gonna make things awkward, won't Jacey?" Asked Simon

Simon is Clary's best friend and him and Jace hang out sometimes

"Simon, don't remind Jace," Izzy said

"Well if you are telling me to not then consider it done," said Simon

Jace was pretty sure he liked Izzy, but Izzy will probably never go for him.

"You knew him?" Asked Clary.

"Yeah," Jace said.

"Will it make it awkward to work with him?"

"Not unless he makes it that way, Clary." He told her

"Anyway, I am having dinner with my mom tonight so I am gonna head out," Jace said.

His shift was over.

"Your not gonna say hi?" Asked Izzy

"No if he wants to talk to me he'll message me, kinda a rule he has," said Jace

"Ok, well tell Céline I said hi," Izzy said

"Will do," he answered.

______

"So sunshine, how was work today?" Asked his mom

Céline was a photographer, and she arranged flowers for people as well, Jace grew up loving flowers and plants because of it.

"It was good, though Alec is our new Captain," he said

"Oh," was all his mom said

"He didn't tell me or Iz."

"That's strange," his mom said

"Yeh, did Maryse say anything to you?" He asked

"No, me and Maryse don't talk much since you kids graduated, I don't think she likes me very much," his mother said with that smile that said she was fine, but really she was upset.

"Nah, Maryse is just a tough woman, she doesn't like many people," he reassured his mom.

"Thank you sweetie, but you don't have to reassure me, I have you so I am fine," she said

It had always been him and his mom, ever since he can remember, his dad left them when he was 6, and he hasn't really seen him since, he also doesn't know what he did to make his dad want to leave.

"sunshine, what's wrong?" She asked

"Nothing, I was just thinking," he said

"Whenever you say that, it usually involves your father," his mom said

She knew him so well

"Yeah, I guess I still wonder why he left and why he has never tried to get into contact with me," he said

"Your father is a complicated man, and I loved him but he had some issues he needed to work out, your grandmother is a hard woman, I can't imagine being raised by her, let alone disappointing her which your father did when he married me," his mother said

"well I don't know why, because you are an amazing woman," he told his mom

"I love you, my son," she said

"I love you too mom," he told her.

______

When he got home that night he received a message from Alec, it said "Sorry I didn't tell you, it was complicated and I couldn't exactly say much, let's get coffee some time and talk about it."

I guess life is complicated, he thought to himself.

He texted Clary to make sure she got home alright

She said. "Yes, but why do you text me this every night?"

He told her, he was just being a gentleman, but really he couldn't say it's because he cared about her.

@khaleesiofalicante I tried 😎

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queenk00k · 4 years ago

Text

but what if we were pure gold all along? jj maybank (chapter 2)

Summary: After the assumed death of their best friend, the Pogues are falling apart at the seams. With Pope and Kiara getting closer and JJ left with nowhere to go, he finds himself left to his own devices. Feeling lost and rejected, his luck seems to turn when he meets Scarlett - a Kook who doesn’t treat him like shit and has an affinity for partying. JJ gets sucked into her world as she promises to help him forget.

How much longer can he keep running from his demons? And what happens when he starts sharing a bed with one?

Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, child abuse, angst, sexual content, drug use, underage drinking.

Author’s note: Hi all, this is my multi-chapter fic I’ve been working on. My oneshots & Rafe series have taken off so I thought it was time to share this one too. Let me know what you think!

Word count: 1.9K

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER 1

the one where those damn kooks are charming when they want to be

JJ had never really gotten used to a beating. He knew when to expect one, based off Luke’s mood when he got home, the glint in his eye, the way his tone changed when he spoke to him. Thanks to being scared shitless of his dad for the majority of his childhood, JJ was well attuned to the subtleties of other people’s emotions. Silver lining, he figured. Means he always knew when the other Pogues were pissed at him without them saying anything, always knew when Rafe was looking for a fight.

Didn’t make having the crap kicked out of him any more enjoyable.

“You think I wasn’t going to find out you stole from me, you stupid boy?” Luke spits his words as if they were venom, standing over JJ who’s clutching his stomach in pain on the floor.

JJ looks up at his father, jaw clenched. “I was helping John B, Dad! I thought you’d be happy I was screwing over the cops! We didn’t know about the storm!”

JJ quickly comes to realise that was the wrong thing to say.

Luke’s eyes are aflame with rage, his stare boring holes into JJ as his dad hoists him up by the front of his shirt and slams him into the wall, fists clenched around the cheap cotton.

“Happy?! Boy, nothing about you makes me happy.”

A punch to JJ’s gut.

“You cost me thousands –“

Another blow, this time to his jaw.

“- spend your life doing fuck all except smoking weed-“

JJ attempts to throw Luke off him but the older man is stronger, despite clearly being drunk out of his mind, and he slams JJ back against the wall, knocking a picture onto the hardwood floor in the process.

“And now you’ve stolen from me, you ungrateful, worthless piece of shit!”

Luke slams his fist into the side of JJ’s head and his father’s red face, contorted with rage, is the last thing JJ sees before he falls, unconscious, onto the floorboards.

When JJ comes to, head pounding, he blinks his eyes open slowly and raises his hand to the side of his face. He brings his fingers away from his cheek shakily, notices they’re sticky with blood, touches his lip gingerly and realises that’s split and swollen too.

JJ grunts and moves to roll onto his back before attempting to get up.

Attempting the operative word, as a searing pain in his side forces him to lay back down briefly, hissing at the pain.

Great, he thinks. He’s really done a number on me this time.

JJ lays there for a few moments, staring up at the slightly dilapidated ceiling of the Chateau, listening for any telltale signs Luke was still in the vicinity. He wouldn’t be surprised if Luke stuck around to lay down another beating but he’s grateful for the silence that confirms he’s been left alone once again.

After a few shaky breaths, JJ finally finds the courage to stand to his feet, wincing at the soreness in his body and making a mental note to find an icepack somewhere in the kitchen. Kiara used to be the one to look after him when he showed up at the Chateau after disappearing for days, her gentle touch calming him more than he liked to admit, soothing his bruises and making him feel like someone gave a shit about him.

JJ swallows thickly. He wishes Kiara was here now.

JJ scoffs at the thought and the feeling of tenderness dissipates as quickly as it appears, replaced by the more familiar feeling of bitterness that rises up like bile.

Resigning to the fact that he won’t see Kiara for a very long time because she doesn’t want to see him (conveniently forgetting that it’s not like she has that much choice in the matter), JJ sighs heavily and makes his way down the hall.

JJ ignores the feeling of complete desperation and confusion as he enters his old, dead friend’s kitchen and opens the fridge, silently praying the cops at least had the decency to leave their beer alone.

For the first time in a few weeks, something’s gone his way and JJ cracks open a Budweiser, letting himself smile ever so slightly.

He’s surprised he remembers how.

Drinking alone is never as fun as you think it is.

JJ’s sprawled out on the steps of the porch at 1am, beer bottles surrounding him like a shrine, his Zippo the only form of light in an otherwise unusually dark night.

Suddenly, JJ gets the overwhelming urge to take his bike and ride it across the island to Figure 8.

Never mind that he’s drunk, never mind that he knows he’ll find his way back to places that painfully remind him of his friends, and never mind that by taking the risk of going to the other side of the island he could run into a Kook.

Maybe JJ was looking for a fight tonight.

Before he’s had a chance to think rationally (but when does he ever?), JJ is speeding through the streets of Figure 8, past big Kook houses and Kook golf courses, struggling to keep his bike straight as his vision blurs.

He’s doing reasonably well at staying on the road for someone of his inebriated state, and he’s honestly pretty impressed with himself, enjoying the feeling of the warm wind whipping through his hair.

That is, until he realises he’s going past the Crain house and he sees Rose Cameron’s face on a placard and he’s filled with overwhelming rage and he’s distracted and all of a sudden the bike swerves off the road.

JJ panics and makes a futile attempt to straighten up again, but its too late and he skids off the road and is catapulted into a thicket of trees.

JJ groans and pats himself down, checking that he still has all of his necessary limbs. He breathes deeply and squeezes his eyes shut.

Typical, he thinks.

JJ plans to stay lying on the side of the road for the rest of the night, if he’s honest with himself, before a girl’s voice snaps him out of his reverie.

“You know you’re supposed to keep the bike upright, don’t you?”

JJ opens one eye to see someone, a Kook, standing over him. She’s slender and dressed in a white sundress, the contrast stark against her tanned skin, her dark hair tied back in a braid.

JJ huffs. “What do you care, Kook?”

The girl crouches down and looks at his battered face, wincing. It’s not the usual disdain JJ is used to – he thinks he can actually see some pity reflected in her features.

“You look like shit, what happened?”

“Leave me – wait, do I know you from somewhere?”

JJ knows he’s a good friend, but sometimes it feels like he’s loyal to a fault.

That’s how he finds himself in the middle of a Kook nightmare, pressed against rich assholes dressed in designer clothes, all for the annual Midsummers party.

JJ’s walking around the perimeter of the country club, looking over his shoulder for Rafe and his henchmen and cursing John B under his breath for putting himself in this situation in the first place.

He’s needing to pretend to be a waiter, so JJ is absentmindedly picking up empty glasses as he goes, feeling grateful he hasn’t had to speak to someone yet.

That is, of course, until he almost trips over a figure crouched down on the patio.

“Woah, you trying to kill me?”

JJ looks down and sees a girl in a black dress, bending down, her fingers wrapped around the neck of a vodka bottle.

“Can I point out that you’re the one in my way? This is a tripping hazard.”

The brunette girl rolls her eyes and gives JJ the finger, but he can tell its not malicious.

“I’ll make you a deal, Pogue.”

JJ widens his eyes in panic. Cover blown.

The girl chuckles. “I know you’re a Pogue. I’m drunk, not stupid. Plus, don’t think I haven’t seen you around at the boneyard.”

JJ hates that he wants to flirt with her, and he clears his throat. “What’s your deal?”

“I won’t tell the Camerons you’re here, practically committing fraud, and you won’t snitch to the country club that I stole their top shelf vodka to spice up my evening.”

JJ’s mildly impressed. “I guess we’re both criminals,” he replies and moves to walk away, before turning back briefly. “I didn’t catch your name.”

The girl smiled mysteriously. “Unimportant.”

“Yeah. You nearly tripped over me at Midsummers,” the girl replies, holding her hand out for JJ to take, which he does, and helps him onto his feet.

JJ attempts to dust himself off. “Do I get to know your name now?”

She smiles. “I’m Scarlett. You’re JJ, right?”

JJ nods. “How’d you know?”

“I know some people that know you, but it’s unimportant. I’m sorry about your friend.”

JJ doesn’t want to talk about John B, least of all with a Kook. “Right, well, I best get going,” he says as he turns towards his bike, dreading the ride back to the Chateau.

Scarlett looks at him incredulously. “You look nasty as fuck.”

“Thanks,” JJ responds bitterly.

Scarlett rolls her eyes. “You didn’t let me finish. Let me take you back to mine, help you clean up a bit.”

Then, sensing the hesitation in JJ, she adds “At least let me give you bandaid or something, and you can do it yourself if you’re so tough.”

JJ figures there’s no harm in using someone’s supplies, especially a Kook’s, and it’s not like he can go home to anyone else.

He shrugs. “Sure, whatever, thanks.”

After Scarlett convinces JJ his bike will be just fine hidden at the Crain property (the Camerons have more pressing issues at the moment, Scarlett tells him, her voice catching), they make their way to Scarlett’s house.

It’s the biggest and most impressive house he’s ever been in, and JJ can’t help but feel extremely uncomfortable at the thought of stepping into a Kook’s home.

“Where are your parents?” He asks, as Scarlett rummages around in her drawers for first aid supplies, his arms folded over his chest.

“They’re out,” she replies simply, and brandishes cream and bandaids at him. “Are you going to let me do this for you?”

JJ furrows his brow and snatches the supplies from her outstretched hand.

“I’m good, thanks. I can do it myself.”

Scarlett nods and sits down at the edge of her bed in silence, as JJ clumsily cleans his cuts, face scrunched in pain as it stings. He successfully places the last bandaid and looks at Scarlett, who hasn’t said another word.

“I, uh – thanks, I guess,” JJ says awkwardly, placing his hands in his pockets. “I should go.”

Scarlett looks at her phone at the time, 3:30am, and shakes her head.

“You can stay here, it’s late and I have a feeling you’re not quite up to the ride home.”

JJ panics, eyes wide, and resorts back to guarded defensiveness. “I’m not sleeping here. I don’t even know you.”

Scarlett sighs. “You didn’t seem to have an issue with that when you came home with me. Look, you can sleep on my couch,” she says as she gestures towards the plush couch in the corner of her large bedroom.

JJ huffs. Kooks, he thinks, but he nods reluctantly.

It’s the feeling of overwhelming loneliness, coupled with the fact that someone actually cared about him, that leads JJ to spend the night sleeping on a Kook’s couch.

taglist (message me to be added to my taglist for all works):

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#tw: violence #tw: child abuse #jj maybank #jj outer banks #jj maybank x oc #jj maybank fic #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank fanfic #jj maybank fanfiction #outer banks #outer banks fic #outer banks imagine #outer banks fanfic #outer banks fanfiction #obx #obx fanfic #obx fic #obx imagine #obx fanfiction

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bugmangaka · 3 years ago

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Character of the Day #0 (Intro)

Here are the Main Characters for Mae and the Kingdoms of Seasons!

Mae, the Titular Character

Mae is a young adult who struggles with severe anxiety. Because of her anxiety, she is selectively mute, and she can sign. She is adopted, and therefore is an only child which is unusual for Seiki. She has two moms, and is bisexual herself! Her best friend is Dolly, her mentor is Noble, and her partner is Joel.

Asha

Asha is a Seiki from the past era who had a fierce spirit. She swears the most out of any character and doesn't act very "lady-like," which she learned from her strong mother. Sexism was rampant at that time so her disposition was seen as inappropriate for a girl. However, her outgoing personality made her extremely popular with her peers. She took shit from nobody, and wasn't afraid to speak her mind. When she met Thatcher, he sadly took those qualities out of her. She spent the entirety of her afterlife following her family tree down and searching for a way to make up her past mistakes. She passed down a letter explaining what really happened to Ruben, but nobody in her family took it seriously... until Mae.

Ruben

Ruben was a bright-eyed student who really loved learning. He was an only child just like Mae, except for him it was because his family was extremely poor and the rest of his parents' eggs didn't make it. He's neurodivergent and struggles in social situations, but he just really really wants friends. He's picked on a lot but doesn't often realize that he is, he'll talk to anybody to try and befriend them. He'll often brag about his good grades and intellect as a way to impress people and make them like him, but others usually find him annoying. He wanted to grow up to do something so great that everybody would love him. He's overwhelmed by his own feelings, feeling too happy or too sad burns him out and causes him to shut down. When he starts to feel 'too much' he'll hide his face in his scarf. he studied with the human because he thought it was a great idea and that he was going to help everybody. He never intended things to go so south.. and even when he was reformed he never intended to hurt anybody.

Joel

Joel is Mae's partner, and one of her closet friends! He is pansexual, and completely mute because he was born without vocal chords. He learned how to sign when he was in elementary school thanks to his twin brother, Jeremiah. He grew up in a horribly abusive household, his mother thought that the Gods were punishing her for giving her a mute child. She tried to get him to talk by hurting him, and disapproved of him signing. He has a scar under his headband from his mom, from when she pulled so hard on his antennae that one split open. She would verbally and physically abuse both of her kids as 'punishment' for being 'such a burden to her,' and her husband just went along with it not bothering to stop her. One night, when he was 12, she was so mad that she kicked him out of the house. He only was able to take one of his journals with him and some food scraps and spent a while wandering around the kingdom homeless. Eventually, he stumbled upon an old man who helped him build a small shack to live in. He then found Mae's middle school, and watched the kids go in and out for a few days until a teacher noticed him and brought him in as part of the class. He met Mae when she walked past his house one day, and when he signed to her she signed back. He had never met another person besides his brother that could sign before and he instantly started crushing on her. The two became close friends in high school, and Joel was pining for her hard the entire time. Mae returned his feelings, but they didn't get together until during her big journey. Joel is a writer! He's mainly a poet, but he's been writing ever since he was little and is what he does for his job. He wrote the book "Tales of Kingdoms Past," which was about the other three kingdoms and what they did during the 200 year gap in communication. Joel has serious trauma from his past but denies it. He just wants his mom to love him and believes it's because he wasn't good enough, and was his fault.

Dolly

Dolly is Mae's best friend! They've been super close since they met in kindergarten. Dolly comes from a wealthy, higher-class family that has 5 daughters, her being the oldest in the litter. She's super upbeat and easily excitable, and loves getting to know knew people. She's very popular in her school and is invited to a lot of things, but she always makes sure to spend time with Mae and stick by her side. Dolly's parents are neglectful despite their family's "perfect" appearance. Her dad wanted a son, so he doesn't give them the time of day, and her mother doesn't bother to get to know them and is always away. Her parents usually leave her money and then leave for a couple days. Dolly and her sisters constantly want their mom's attention, but because Dolly was born looking the most like her mom, she's the only one that gets the sliver of attention. This affection is superficial and meaningless, and leaves her feeling empty, but it causes intense jealously between her and her sisters, they don't get along well at all. Her mother always advised her daughters to marry someone rich like she did (which is an indicator of what her parents' relationship is like), and to always appear submissive and weak because guys are 'turned away from powerful women.' Because of this, Dolly always dated higher-class boys her weren't the nicest. Several of them would try to take advantage of her because they knew that her dad didn't care enough to go after them. She'd always break up with them within a few weeks or so, they weren't her type at all but she was only following her mom's advice. Dolly is a very talented seamstress and sketcher, and wanted to own her own boutique one day. However she never thought she could because her mother would tell her women shouldn't work. When she graduated she met Anthony and started dating him, and she was able to be herself around him. The two got married very quickly on a whim, and then immediately after accidentally made a litter of 7 babies.

Anthony

Anthony is Dolly's husband! He's very timid and has a slight stutter. He comes from a notoriously wealthy family that is known for their extremely successful sons. Their family consists of two litters, the first being of 4 boys, Noble being the oldest of them. These are the 4 sons that are so famous. The second litters is of all girls except for Anthony. His sisters are very successful too, but outsiders always forget about Anthony and don't recognize him. He's very smart and loves math, and studied outside of school to become a tax collector for the queen (in this kingdom, taxes are only for the rich). He loves his wife and kids very much, and loves making horrible math puns.

Noble

Noble is the Captain of the Royal Guard! He is also Mae's mentor, and is gay and autistic. He is close friends with Queen Dahlia. He's the strong quiet type, a man of few words. He's strict and knows how to command his men, not somebody you'd want to mess with, He's well respected for his skill and leadership. He was a prodigy, and started learning how to use a sword when he was three. He was mentored by the previous captain of the guard himself, September. When he was in middle school, he was allowed into the guard program early. He lived away from home in the guards quarters from then on. While he was growing up there he figured out he was gay, but the royal guard is generally full of unaccepting people. He worked hard and was chosen to become September's successor, being the kingdom's youngest captain. He values his reputation a lot, and is terrified of people finding out his sexuality. He eventually gets together with Jeremiah, and is outted to the guard by somebody.

Jeremiah

Jeremiah is Joel's older twin! He's quite poor, and lives in a worn down one-room house where he runs his business, "Jeremiah's Shipping and Deliveries." He delivers tools and building materials to those who request it. Jeremiah was the one that was left behind with his mom after Joel left. Growing up, he always tried to act as the tough one and would stand up for his little brother when he was picked on. He's also queer, liking both girls and boys, but heavily denied it. He always picked fights with others that he couldn't win, and was used to getting beat up. When Joel was gone, he became very lonely and even more self-destructive. He became more violent and did horribly in school, he became friends with his pervious bullies and got into a lot of trouble with them. When he was a sophomore his dad left, and he had to deal with his mother by himself. He inherited bipolar disorder from his mother but he doesn't know that. When it came time to graduate he left home and never looked back. He's an alcoholic, he drinks to numb his feelings. He sleeps around with girls all the time, only to feel loved for one night. All these things just leave him feeling worthless and empty. Eventually, he reunited with Joel after seeing the book his brother published. He loves Joel and Mae so much, and is afraid of messing up his relationship with them. He has horrible self-esteem and constantly worries that he only has a bad impact on others. Eventually he meets Noble, who helps him accept himself and starts dating him.

Dahlia

Dahlia is the current reigning queen of the Seiki Kingdom. She's close friends with Noble. It was her controversial decision to send Mae out on her journey, but she was pressured into making a hasty choice by her brother and royal advisor, Cedar. Dahlia is quiet and regal, and tries to keep her emotions to herself. The entire purpose of her birth was to become the next queen, so she never had the chance to be a child. From day one she was taken and raised to be the perfect ruler. She's constantly under the pressure of Cedar, who is mean to her behind closed doors. Later on, Cedar pressures her to make an heir with somebody since she's getting older. She chooses Vincent for that job, but the two actually fall in love and she appoints him as her and her newborns' official doctor so that she gets to see him again.

Thatcher

Thatcher..... is basically the worst person. He is one of the worst villains in this universe. He was Asha's husband in the past era. He's a sociopath and a misogynist, and very rich. He's albino, which makes many see him as unique and attractive. Thatcher is incredibly clever, and nows how to manipulate everyone around him into thinking he's great and can do no harm. In reality, he has a violent mind with dark desires. He's the kinda guy to fantasize about keeping a girl in his basement. He owns an expensive store that sells jewels and holiday items. He met Asha when she was about to leave on her holiday trip. He noticed how loud and outgoing she was, and he thought that it'd be fun to "break/tame" her and force her into the role that he thought a woman should have. He flirted with her that day, but she rejected him. He saw this as part of the fun and proceeded to stalk her for the rest of the day. The entire time she was gone, he never stopped thinking about her and what he wanted to do to her. When she came back in tears after Ruben was "killed," he used that chance to act as her shoulder to cry on and worm his way into her life. They started dating, even though she wasn't very into it. Her mother and her friends encouraged her to marry him because of his status within their community. She did, but once they were married shit hit the fan fast. Thatcher was abusive to her, he'd slowly add onto what he could get away with. He'd pressure her into intimacy, and eventually would force himself onto her. He wanted kids, so he forced her to have his. She tried avoiding it for a while by using contraception without his knowledge, but when he found out he started getting physically abusive. Eventually, Asha became a shell of who she once was. Thatcher succeeded in breaking her, her fighting spirit was gone and she was quiet and numb. When their kids were four, Asha took her own life. Thatcher had pushed her too far. The loss of his wife was Thatcher's biggest regret, he couldn't take that back. But to him it wasn't the loss of his love, it was the loss of his favorite toy. He tried to regain his pride by manipulating his kids into believing that their mother passed because she didn't love them.

Verity

Verity is the current reigning queen of the Kitsuga kingdom! She was a strong warrior and leader, but her life was changed forever when the plague attacked. When Ruben's plague got to her kingdom, it killed many of the Kitsuga warriors, including her husband and the king, Clay. Her two kids Sato and Mana managed to hide, but many other Kitsuga were injured. Her son, Sato, decided to cocoon early to get his wings and encouraged many of his young peers to do so as well so that they could be more useful to the kingdom when they emerge. Verity is not silent most of the time, and just stands watching the kingdom from her den. She's still grieving the loss of her husband. She treated Mae like her own daughter, and was the one that taught her Mae's signature dive-bomb technique.

Marvin

Marvin is a Hachitsu, he's an inventor! He's autistic, asexual, and aromantic. He loves loves tinkering with machinery, coming up with ideas, and making friends. He's super passionate about his work and showing people what he does, but he sometimes is oblivious to social cues and accidentally oversteps some boundaries. He's broke, and can just barely afford the rent on the garage he lives in. He bakes in his free time and sells his pastries to get a smidge of income. His sister, Pamela, is the only sibling that visits him regularly and makes sure he's taking care of himself. He's the only one in his family without a "real job," so his siblings and parents think that he's a disappointment. He met Mae when she came to the kingdom and was wandering around lost, unsure why people were ignoring her/acting rude (she was flying, and since the Hachitsu can't fly its considered rude to fly in their kingdom instead of using the stairs and pulleys). He saw this as an opportunity to finally make some money and made her pay for him to show her around. He ended up giving her her money back after she saved him when the plague attacked the Hachitsu, and the two became close friends. The two remain pen pals! Marvin's dream was to create an invention that would finally allow the Hachitsu to fly, he spent months trying to get the design right, and he just finally succeeded in creating a glider.

Charlotte

Charlotte is the current President of the Hachitsu kingdom, and she has been since she was 14 (Hachistu can run as many times as they like). She is the daughter of the previous president, who passed away when she was 14. Her mother encouraged her to become the next leader in her place. Her mother was killed by wasps, which gave Charlotte an intense fear of wasps ever since. She really loves bees! Bees are like dogs to them, they're dangerous to all other forest spirit species except for the Hachitsu, their bee-like colors and pheromones let them exist harmoniously with wild bees. Domestic bees are nice to everybody, regardless of species. She had several guard bees that she loved dearly, when the plague came, infected wasps came after her. Her bees gave their lives to protect her by fighting them off, but became part of the plague themselves. Charlotte is bisexual, but not very interested in dating. She's outspoken and very confident in herself, she's been runnin' this job for a long time and she believes she knows what she's doing.

Bel

Bel is an elderly Kameshi. He's the first and only Kameshi Mae ever met during her journey, although she does meet more later on in life. During the 200 year gap, the Kameshi kingdom had a civil way that led to its destruction. Now, the kingdom is just ruins, and Kameshi live on their own scattered across the forest. He lives in a cave near the remains of the cabin, and often goes through it to find human items. He's a collector of human things, and his cave is littered with various human objects. His scarf is made of a green cloth and thread that he found in the dirt near the cabin, and is actually where Mae's needle came from! When Mae found her needle it was attached to a green thread, it was the very same one. Bel approached Mae because he noticed the needle on her back, and he wanted to get a better look. Bel is everyone's grandpa, he ofc treats Mae like his own granddaughter and is protective of her. He was the one that encouraged her to look inside the cabin to help with her journey. Mae came to visit him over a year later with Joel, and Bel didn't like Joel much sbhjdshsdshd simply because he was "dating" Mae (they were already married at that point lmao). He had also adopted an orphaned 5-year old Kameshi girl who he named Scamp. He gets his own arc later on in the series when he finds a hidden village of Kameshi, and he reunites with his past love, Tuft.

#OC #Mae and the Kingdoms of Seasons #Character of the Day #tw abuse #tw self harm #tw suicide #Mae #Ruben #Asha #Dolly #Joel #Jeremiah #Noble #Dahlia #Bel #Verity #Marvin #Charlotte #thatcher

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disasterinadress97 · 4 years ago

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Dallas Winston Headcannons nobody asked for 🤷🏻‍♀️

Trigger warning ⚠️

A bit of nsfw in there too

Pre Tulsa, life in New York

• His mom was a drug addict and had Bipolar 1 disorder

• He has/had 4 siblings, an older brother (six years older) from his moms previous relationship, older sister (five years older) from his dads past relationship, a twin brother (who was trans ftm) and a little sister (eight years younger than him)

• He was always the one to take care of his mom during her depressive episodes when she wouldn’t leave her bed.

• She often left days-weeks at a time when she was in a manic state

• He practically raises his baby sister, she died when she was four due to cancer

• That was when he decided he hates kids cause they always reminded him of her

• he was always stealing and dealing to get his twin brother anything to help his body dismorphia and feel more comfortable in his body

• His mom often sold his body and his brother’s to her drug dealer when they couldn’t afford drugs (his dad did not know this at the time)

• his dad was actually a good dad till their mom walked out on them when he was 9, that was when he started drinking and abused Dallas because ‘you fuckin look so much like her’

• He was apart of two gangs in New York, one of which was a Drag Queen gang

• The one Queen lived beside him and always heard fighting, she took him under her wing and after his mom left they were practically the ones who raised him and his little sister

• the two older siblings and his twin left a little while after their mom did, that was when he learned you can’t trust anyone

• you bet your ass this boy dressed in drag with his queens, a master with make up, can’t change my mind

• can walk in high heels/‘stripper shoes’ like no other!

• started selling his body to strangers for money after his mom left and his dad started drinking to afford to feed his sister and himself

• His other gang was a bunch of stereotypical big mean, manly gang members

• He started dating a guy from said gang, this guy was hella abusive, controlling and manipulative. Also was twice Dal’s age

• when Dallas left New York he broke up with him and the guy beat the shit out of him and burned him with a poker ‘so you’ll never forget me’

In Tulsa/present?

• has some severe PTSD, also suffers from abandonment issues, anxiety, depression and Bipolar 2 disorder

• Loves him some Rupauls drag race, reminds him of his Queens and how much he misses them

• Acts so tough and mean because In New York he was tough and knew it but was always seen as the ‘little kid’ so going to Tulsa that wasn’t gonna happen again

• first people he came out to about being bi was Mr and Mrs Curtis

• they also found out he was selling his body for rent/food money and that was when they realised how much they care about him

• him and Mrs. Curtis were super close, she was the closest thing he had to a real mom.

• He is actually so soft behind the tough guy act

• cuddles? All the time

• is a total brat sub/bottom don’t @ me

• the gang found out about his Drag Queen past when he accidentally sent pony the wrong photo from his phone ‘you tell them you die!’

• he obviously blabbed

• everyone was shook.

• Johnny was amazed because ‘he’s so tough but so pretty!’

• two bit laughed but lowkey was impressed with Dallys confidence to do that

• Steve was just ‘if it makes him nicer and happier than whateva’

• you already know soda begged him to do his make up let’s ge honest

• Darrel was quiet but was also a good dad and was like ‘as long as it keeps him out of jail we will always love him’

• he was touched but also super embarrassed the gang found out about it, but was thankful they were cool with it

• gang 100% harassed him to wear drag for them Atleast once

• one day dallas brought his make up and shoes over, he did his and soda’s make up and wore his shoes and the gang was shook! ‘How can you walk in those?! So easily??’ ‘He looks prettier than half the girls at school!’

• all the support from the gang!

• Dallas actually reads a lot like pony does but doesn’t talk about it incase he gets made fun of for the books he likes

• is also really smart but plays dumb

• this boy LOVES vampires, they’re his guilty pleasure. We talking the vampire chronicles, the vampire diaries, true blood, he even liked the twilight books but will never tell a soul!

Dating headcanons!

General:

• cuddles all the time

• is very insecure and gets jealous easy

• surprisingly isn’t violent or aggressive when jealous, he’s scared if he is they will leave

• plot twist! Sylvia was actually a beard so Soc’s and other gangs wouldn’t know he’s bi

• they only said she cheated cause she was caught with another dude. The hate and hurt was all an act

• is a brat so will tease his dom in public subtly but so much

• is super clingy

• wants to be together all the time

• always needs reassurance ‘are you sure you’re still happy? Like I didn’t do anything wrong?’ ‘No, babe I love you’. ‘Oh okay, are you sure tho?’ 24/7

Johnny

• always getting Johnny to stay at bucks or his dads when his dad isn’t home so Johnny is safe

• feeding this boy all the time!

• when he hears dal is a bottom Johnny is shook but surpringly into a ‘daddy’ role

• drive in dates whenever they can

• they watch the stars a lot

• when Dallas is super anxious he picks at his nails a lot and Johnny holds his hands to help him feel a bit at ease

• when Dallas is in a manic state Johnny follows him anywhere he goes. Parties, fights, anything. He just wants to make sure he doesn’t get jailed again or hurt

• Johnny highkey loves when Dallas dresses in drag ‘you’re just so confident and hot!’

Steve

• watches while Steve works on his cars, he likes seeing Steve so interested and content

• when either of them fight with their dads they drive around all night and talk. They are both quiet about feelings usually but wanna be there for each other

• hangs around the DX while Steve and soda work

• both don’t say a lot normally but are always touching each other

• when Dallas is in a depressive episode Steve will come to bucks and just lay with him for hours

• They talk about both their moms walking out on them sometimes. They both swear if they ever met these women there would be hell to pay ‘how could she abandon this beautiful person?’

Soda

• all the spooning you could ask for

• Dallas is always complimenting him. ‘You’re so pretty wtf’

• on the anniversary of sodas parents death Dallas buys him flowers and they go to their graves

• when Dallas doesn’t answer his phone Soda highkey panics ‘what if he’s hurt?! What if he’s in jail ahain?’

• Dallas always feels bad about this and tries to make it up to him

• soda is always reminding Dallas he’s not alone and he loves him

• when soda really misses his mom Dallas and him talk about some of their favourite memories with her. Soda is still sad but it makes him a little happier knowing how much she cared about him and the one he loves so much

Two bit

• jokes 24/7

• when the gang isn’t around Dallas only calls him Keith or babe

• two doesn’t usually like his name but when Dallas says it he hates it a little less every time

• two bits mom wasn’t a fan of Dallas at first but after a while and gets to know him she loves him so much ‘mom I’m home’ ‘where is dallas’ ‘idk’ ‘tell him to come over I’m making his favourite dish’

• when two bit gets jealous or feels Dallas is he always puts his arm around his waist or kissing him so the person gets the hint

• twos little sister looks up to their relationship a lot and loves how happy her brother is

• two doesn’t stop drinking but slows down on it when Dallas mentions once it worries him sometimes

• Dallas and twos little sister get close really fast. Dallas is always giving her advice and one day brings her some old make up of his and she loves it!

• two doesn’t understand why dallas seems a little sad after times like these until one day dallas tells him about his little sister and how two should spend more time with her, ‘just in case something happens. I don’t want you to regret anything like I do’

• two makes a point to spend more time together the three of them after that

Pony

• they read together sometimes

• Dallas will go to literally any movie if pony is interested

• picks pony up from school everyday

• if Dallas gets arrested you know pony is lecturing him for Atleast a half hour. Dallas just sits there with heart eyes because ‘damn I missed this pain in my ass’

• dates at the Dingo are their Friday night ritual

• they both have terrible nightmares and are always cuddling and comforting eachother after

• Dallas is always saying little things to pony about his relationship with Darrel ‘I know he’s on your case all the time but it’s cause he means well’. Dallas then tells pony about his brothers and sister and how he wishes he could live with them and see them like pony can with Darrel

• pony and dar still fight sometimes after this but never in front of Dallas

Darrel

• they don’t go out a lot for dates but like to watch their favourite shows together (they kick the gang out for a few hours on these nights)

• Darrel brings out the brat in Dallas 24/7 and he teases him all the time until Darrel gets to a point he just looks at him and with a deep voice ‘bedroom now’ and Dallas practically trips over his own feet running to the room

• they are not quiet either! The gang sees them go in Dar’s room and they all groan and leave ASAP

• the gang found out about them when the gang came over and heard Dallas call out ‘daddy!’ And never let him live it down ‘how’s it going daddy’s boy’ ‘I will literally kill you two bitch’

• Darrel never celebrates his birthday after his parents die and Dallas puts an end to that so fast. He goes all out, flowers, presents, sexy time. Anything he can do

• always sitting on Darrel’s lap, clinging to him, hugging. All of it. He’s just amazed and thankful he has such a strong and beautiful bf who loves him

• dar once let dallas do make up on him and Darrel borderline didn’t like how good he looked in it

• Dallas got him to experiment in drag and Darrel felt hella empowered. Now they dress up together sometimes. But dar says only Dallas is allowed to see him like that

• this makes dal feel extra special and close to dar and he loves it

Tim

• sarcastism never stops

• Tim is quiet but really protective, he can say whatever he wants about Dallas but once someone says one bad thing they best be ready to square up

• patching eachother up after fights al the time

• they be kinky bitches man!

• after a nightmare Dallas told Tim a little bit about his ex and it took dallas an hour to talk him out of going to New York to kill this man

• Dallas does strip teases for Tim in his stripper shoes on special occasions.

• Tim didn’t tease him for his make up or anything, he actually found it real pretty on him

• Tim never lets him stay at his own place or bucks after they get together.

• Tim is Demi sexual

• Dallas heard his ex was released out of prison and has a sever panic attack. Tim was right there reassuring him ‘babe I’m right here. No ones gonna hurt you’.

• dals mom comes to town and Tim got Angela and her friends to give her a ‘Tulsa greeting’. Needless to say she left as soon as she came

This was so long and horrible I’m sorry

Special thanks to @sunlitcigars for helping with some ideas and encouraging me to post these

#dallas winston #outsiders #headcanon #dallyboy #jally #steve/dallas #dalbit #twobit #sodapop #darrel curtis #steve randle #sodapop curtis #johnny cade #mental health #ptsd #new york #tulsa #the outsiders #they trash im sorry

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carriecutforth · 3 years ago

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The Shit

Tumblr is telling me to go ahead, put anything...so here it goes

I haven't been public about this for reasons that will be apparent but gonna start this with all the trigger warnings. I'm writing it here cause I can't talk to the majority of people about it cause most people can't even grasp, and then questions start, putting me in the situation of feeling like my GIANT SWEATER of trauma is being unraveled answering questions that lead to more questions and gah PLEASE DO NOT RETUMBL-- I just need to scream in the void This is the shit: On the day my sister-in-law's mother died she had to call form-1 my baby brother because his psychosis (undiagnosed mental illness which I will get to) was terrorizing their family (three small kids). My mother WHO IS SCHIZOPHRENIC had him released into her and my ANTI-VAXXER ANTI-MASKER narcissist father's care, but NOT before they found out, incidentally due to the FORM 1, he is ALSO really sick with leukemia. I only found out because I decided to dip into the special folder for emails called MOM that I try to avoid reading as long as they can FOR REASONS. But I felt for some reason an urge to, and then I had to try to parse out what had happened from her ramblings that are A LOT. Then I had to confirm with my poor sil who is at her wits end and was in no position to tell me herself. My dad stopped talking to me back in November when I called him for his anti-vax rhetoric as being EUGENICS when he told me it is just the flu and only killing old people and the disabled. I reminded him I've been immuno-compromised my whole life (he KNOWS this) and got chronic fatigue after a flu in late 2016 (he knows this), and did he not care if I DIED? (apparently not) But I was like lol, fine, don't talk to me anymore. Die mad about it for all I care. A lot of people are like: 'oh, that's tough, losing a relationship with your father' and I'm like YOLO (it really isn't if you knew him). SO THEN I have to reach out to my dad: "Why isn't my brother in the hospital being treated by medical professionals for YOU KNOW, HIS LEUKEMIA." My dad responded that the doctors were JUST GOING TO PUMP HIM FULL OF DRUGS! And that HE is treating my brother's leukemia with I dunno baking soda (he told me before it is a cure for cancer). THEN HE GOES RADIO SILENT. I have no idea where my brother is cause they got him an apartment somewhere in Toronto. *though I do have a Machiavellian plan to try to find out. The reason my brother has untreated psychosis is that even though I've begged my parents since he was a TEEN to get him diagnosed, they refused. It's like they have the opposite of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy in that their ABLEISM is soooo bad they refuse to see he has been very sick, and even if he was really sick, 'doctors are stupid' <--quoting my dad. This is the backstory. My dad was always on the road for his job. My mom had my baby brother AGAINST all wishes of her doctor to ever get pregnant again. I'm not talking aborting, she got PREGNANT on purpose again to SERVE GOD'S GREATER PURPOSE even though it might kill her and said future fetus. So he was born with a lot of issues because of the very bad pregnancy's complications on TOP of the very hereditary bipolar/schizophrenia, AND everything else we got going on besides. After he was born, my mom went into a very deep depression for years and then would vacillate between that and mania. Which meant me: THE ELEVEN year old was forced to raise a baby that wasn't hers and had no ultimate authority over. I was called by everyone his *BROTHER'S NAME* SECOND MOM. *More on this later Our relationship is very strained because of this, particularly when at 17 I had enough momming a child while being constantly undermined by my parents absolute shenanigans. So there was resentment when I quit being his 'second mom' and that he equally resented for things like, trying to put him into bed, when my mom would come in and say let him stay up all night or getting him to eat something other than candy for breakfast (you can guess the dynamic with my parents here). Even if my disabled ass could sue my parents for his

care, he doesn't WANT me to be in charge of his care.

And yet still, I tried to advocate for him for years fighting my parents TOOTH and NAIL to get him on disability and out from underneath their thumb so he could have a measure of independence and autonomy. They had every excuse in the book not to get him diagnosed including expense. It was so goddamned awful fighting with them on this cause in their mind: he was going to live with either them or me forever (they decided this for me and my ex-husband and kids with no consultation), so WHY bother set up his future for him??? So when he was 20?, I hatched a Machiavellian PLAN: I got him, against my parent's wishes, into college for the sole reason of getting the resources for him to get diagnosed so that he could get on disability. AND IT WORKED! (kinda) Except my parents twisted him so much into only talking about his autism spectrum symptoms and NONE of the psychosis because their ableism is sooooo entrenched. (but I did manage to get him on ODSP). And subsequent times I forced my dad to take him to a psychiatrist, he's like: 'oh, I forgot to talk about the psychosis we just talked about the aspergers. Besides people with psychosis are untreatable, you can't convince them otherwise' (see again, my mom). Over the years, I have begged my dad to take my brother to get properly diagnosed and treated (I'm not meaning forced, my brother is also agoraphobic, and won't leave his place UNLESS he is driven by my dad and was living in a city far away from me). I said, I was very concerned for his kids but my dad always gaslights me (and tells everyone I'm crazy -- the IRONY). So now my mom is writing me emails about how this is all my sil's fault because 'she is on drugs' (she is not), 'she is sleeping around' (she is not), 'her kids are scared of her not my brother' (it's the exact opposite). WHICH IS A HUGE TRIGGER FOR ME because She did the exact same thing to ME with my other brother (a diagnosed PSYCHOPATH) who used to beat me and the rest of us mercilessly when my parents weren't around (and they never believed me, and told everyone not to believe me because I was crazy), who pulled a KNIFE on me and threw a drawer at me when I was NINE MONTHS PREGNANT, and how absolutely awful I was AS HIS SISTER to kick him out of my house with no place to live or go (cause he was living with me and my ex-husband at the time because THEY KICKED HIM OUT OF THEIR PLACE and didn't want him back.) Are you beginning to get a sense of the dynamic of my family? Soooooooo the last few weeks my brain has just been in total trauma mode going processing, processing, processing, processing as the final total realization of how absolutely awful my family is finally laid bare (I mean I knew but at least I can stop feeling guilty about cutting them out of my life). So back to the 'second mom' shit, as relevant to my trauma brain processing the last few weeks. This whole shit above is just the tip of the iceberg. I was raised as a Joho in which a lot of my trauma comes from a pedophile left loose on three generations of girls in my family over a thirty year period, and if anyone came forward they were threatened with disfellowshipment and there is SO MUCH there it would take me several Tolkien novels to get how absolutely awful, extensive it was, and how the coverup went straight to the top. ANYHOO. So who was calling me my brother's 'second mom???' Well since, I wasn't allowed to have any association with non-witnesses, it was my congregation. No one questioned that I was being parentified and it was a deeply abusive situation. NO WHAT HAPPENED instead was, this sister in the congregation told everyone (when I was fifteen and 80 pounds soaking wet at the height of 5'10 1/2) that my brother WAS REALLY MY CHILD cause it was so obvious the way that I was the one who took care of him. And the elders of our congregation MARKED me as bad association for loose morals for having a supposed child out of wedlock when I was ELEVEN YEARS OLD. AND NO ONE in my congregation would talk to me, and I had NO IDEA why, cause they never told me that I HAD BEEN

MARKED. But the caveat was I was not allowed to talk to people outside of the faith. And we only found out about this a year an a half later when she said the same shit back in my hometown where he was born to a sister who was at the hospital where my brother was born. AND NO ONE thought, hey: maybe if we think she had a baby when she was eleven we should um CALL CHILD SERVICES or some shit? So i was like 16 1/2, not allowed to have any friends OUTSIDE OF MY PARENTS, find out THIS SHIT, and then people wonder why I had my first manic episode at 17??? Yeah, so this is where my brain has been stuck the last month, complicated that I knew I would be at risk for hypomania with things opening back up, and I'm supposed to be shooting a pilot for a potential series I'm the creator/co-shorunner of, so now I've had to go BACK on seroquel and it's the worst while i try to acclimatize myself to the drugs and stave off hypomania at the same time. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

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kim-lexie · 4 years ago

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start-up

unfortunately all good dramas must come to an end, and this drama was truly a dream. i fell in love with the characters and the premise of this one, and i am saddened to say goodbye to this cast of characters.

i have also posted the nonsense that is a week-by-week to enjoy here if you wish. anyways, here we go...a drama review!

plot synopsis.

‘start up’ follows the story of a group of 20-somethings as they journey to curate their own start up business. it specifically emphasizes the story of dalmi, her past and the letters she shared with jipyeong. jipyeong, an orphan that dalmi’s grandmother, mrs. choi took under her wing. jipyeong wrote dalmi letters that truly allowed her to overcome a tough time. years after these letters, dalmi is determined to find her ‘dosan’ the name that jipyeong and mrs. choi used to sign the letters. to protect their secret they find the real dosan to meet dalmi to portray a successful start up business man. and that is where our story begins to become tangled. and one knows how a good tangled story ensues as per the k-drama fashion...

my thoughts. *spoiler alert*

dalmi, this girl is a queen. i love her determination and drive to get what she wants. i wish she wouldn’t cut herself short, but by the end you can see the growth that is undeniable. we love character development! i love how impacted she was by her dad, and that she never questioned her choice to stay in korea with her father. i loved their family’s relationship, it was precious and mutually supporting one another was an environment that allowed dalmi to believe in all the dreams she held in her heart. mrs. choi truly raised her to be confident in herself no matter her circumstances.

jipyeong (to be referenced as hjp as well) my man. this man stole my heart. his backstory with mrs. choi was beautiful and i think he had the most character development in this drama. from how he acted at the start, to when they reconnected later, mrs. choi extended grace and never wavered in her love and support for jipyeong. it was endearing and heart breaking, because hjp had never experienced that from a family of his own until he was accepted by mrs. choi. i think this grace and mutual understanding was especially prominent when dosan and dalmi greeted mrs. choi at her new shop in one of the last episodes, after dosan had returned from america. as soon as she greeted them she knew that her jipyeong would be lonely and went straight for him to comfort him and support him in his grief. his character was honest, and unwavering once he found his goal. honestly, in everything else in the drama he faced he was determined and goal oriented however, when it came to dalmi he always second guessed himself. he was always so sure of his business but when it came to the close relationships around him he always questioned his worth. this would be his tragic downfall. but this is where we find a new jipyeong at the end of the drama and we appreciate character development. *insert slow clap for our hjp*

dosan this man, honestly nam joohyuk was the reason i was initially interested in this drama. i love him and i was surprised when i found that he was not my favorite character. dosan was always unsure of himself and those around him, he immediately latched on to dalmi when he found her because of that confidence she radiated (can’t blame him because eventually he found that in himself). i wish he had been honest with her. so i know it is typically k-drama fashion to start a relationship based on a lie, still i am never happy when it happens in my drama. seriously by the end of this drama i was totally team hjp and i seriously cannot help but think back to the fact that if hjp had been honest at the beginning he may have ended up with dalmi. like come on. my heart is too fragile for this nonsense. i do appreciate that dosan, right after reading her letters ran straight after her without wavering. but if he loved her authenticity from the letters, why did he not give her the same benefit by being up front with her?

the samsan tech crew. i loved this trio. they were ICONIC. chulsan a precious bean and i loved the relationship we got to see between chulsan and saha. i loved how their relationship developed and she totally fell head over heels for this man with his coding and caring self. because i clearly did not get the happy ending i wanted for dalmi and hjp, at least this ship went off sailing. i also came to love yongsan’s character, he seemed fishy at first when they went to sandbox however it quickly came to light why it was so. i loved that through all of this there was character development and accepting the things that you can’t change and wanted to change the things you had control over.

sandbox, a place where dreams came to be birthed and reach their unlimited potential. i loved that it all started with sun-hak the ceo of sandbox who was inspired by dalmi’s father’s story about wanting to protect his daughter when she was learning to swing, and he put sand down so she wouldn’t be afraid of falling. it was so perfect, and that is exactly what sandbox became for them, a place for these small companies to get their footing to grow. i love the relationship that sunhak had with jipyeong and how they supported these young businesses.

this makes an interesting juxtaposition for injae’s company, (injae is dalmi’s sister) to come in next to. nature morning is run by injae’s step-father, a man who abuses start ups and exploits young talent for profit. this sets the stage for injae to want to be set free and create her own business, because as long as she is under his family name she truly cannot make a name for herself. as she leaves she is overcomes multiple difficulties that her father’s company places in front of her, but the queen that she is takes them in stride and in the end becomes the company to beat.

it was interesting to see how everyone came to be at sandbox. everyone with something to prove. and how once they were at sandbox all these crazy moments led them to their ultimate goal. their journey was not conventional but it made them stronger to overcome those moments when their company was split (frick you alex), and they had to come back together.

to take a moment that three year time gap was something. i loved that dalmi grew and became more confident as her role as a ceo to get the job done. sisters were working together and growing their companies. i also held out so much hope because jipyeong was starting to get his act together and was becoming confident in himself and his intentions towards dalmi. even going over to their house playing go-stop and making banchan with the family, tears because he never had this in his life. but you know dosan was going to show up right at that moment he was going to say something...anyways, i love that dosan kept his promise and worked on not only the app for mrs. choi but the car because of the dream they birthed before the boys left for the states. and i knew the moment our dalmi walked hours in the woods to get to dosan that it was over for my ship and it twas going to sink.

the app! oh my goodness. i love that this was their first idea for the company to help those who are unable to see. and i love that dosan was inspired by mrs. choi after overhearing her diagnosis. it was so sad to see how her vision declined throughout the show. but i am happy to see that their app was able to help her through this difficult journey.

the smart car was such a moment. a dream they had in the top of the rooftop office led to a company that was bigger than any of them. truly incredible. literally so proud of our boys for their work and dedication to their dream to better the world. loved it.

i seriously appreciated the ending of the drama and how they recapped all the moments they couldn’t fit into the few moments we had left. the living through photos we saw how they all kept their promises to each other. from dosan proposing to dalmi, chulsan and saha announcing their relationship, and even chulsan shaving his head. it was precious to see them all on this journey. i loved how we had them all going to the share holders meeting and injae and jipyeong walking in stride with them! also appreciate a full circle moment for hjp, when he sponsors a new start up connecting orphans with sponsors to help them in the difficult transition where hjp found himself with mrs. choi. (side note: i love the hint that the man who founded the start up had the same voice as young-sil, the smart device that grew on hjp throughout the drama.) (also, totally stand behind that one tweet i saw that said that the writers totally missed a major power couple moment for injae and jipyeong. because my dude and queen deserve to be happy to the fullest.)

i hope everyone enjoyed this drama as much as i did because it is definitely up there on my list of favorites from this year. i would rate it a 9.5 out of 10.

the ost.

‘future’ by non other than red velvet slays. i have this not only on my k-drama playlist but my monthly playlist. this is a bop. it is incredible, and they out did themselves with this one.

‘running’ by gaho. that montage song that had all the moments they worked so hard in fast forward. ahhhh

‘my dear love’ by suzy. her voice so angelic. and we thank our busy queen for making time to sing for the ost as well as star in the drama.

‘blue bird’ by ailee. and ‘dream’ by jamie. ballad favorites.

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desiraypark · 4 years ago

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Boiling Point (Pt. I)

So, on another platform, @yourpaterson, @leather-and-embers, and I started a little something. It got angsty. It got love triangle-y. Hate-sex was involved. A lil’ jealousy. I’ve decided to expand upon this potential love triangle with a backstory for “Desiray”. Characters: Desiray (as a character) x Kylo Ren x Paterson (not yet mentioned)

Disclaimer: This backstory is fiction. None of it is a reflection of my personal life, my childhood, or even my personality. // Content Warning: Abuse (memories of); engrained misogyny; broken home; broken mother/daughter relationship; broken (non-existent) father/daughter relationship; child abuse; burns; abortion mention (as punishment/in an abusive tone). Mentions of supernatural abilities.

When did Desiray know she was “alone”? When she was 15 years old.

“Watch the pot on the stove for me, will you?” Mama requested. Desi nodded. Her sister sat across the table from her, doing her homework. Desi was doing the same. Mama left the pot of boiling noodles when she went to use the restroom.

Bubbling, bubbling--not quite ready.

No one knew it, but Desiray was at a breaking point. Her first boyfriend--well, who she thought was her boyfriend--he’d denied her in front of his friends to raucous laughter. “I’m not trying to be your boyfriend, I was just trying to fuck,” he’d said once the laughter subsided.

____________________

Even when she was an embryo, Desi had learned that no matter how often and how much people hurt you--especially men--you must remain dignified. Ladylike. Take verbal and physical assault in stride. Your patience would be rewarded, someday.

“I should have made you get an abortion,” Desi heard her father say when she was floating in her mother’s belly. Yes.

"Who...who told you that?” Mom asked when Desi brought it up.

“You should have gotten an abortion like dad said.” That’s exactly what Desi told her mother in an argument.

“Who...who told you that?”

“I heard him say it.” _____________________

Dad was in the living room watching television with a drink in one hand and an appetizer of a sandwich in the other. Because he was the only one in the home deserving of an escape from his family. And of course, when his mental vacation was over, he decided to bring hell to his wife.

Bubbling, bubbling...one more minute.

Voices raised. Desi rubbed the weariness away from her forehead--hoping that her ability to hear might be temporarily erased with the rub. Dawn, her sister, shrunk in her chair. Mama came into the kitchen. Sigh. That usually resulted in Desi and Dawn being caught in the crossfire.

Bubbling, bubbling...turn the burner off. Move the pot.

Mama wouldn’t finish dinner tonight.

To this day, Desi still can’t quite remember what they were arguing about. But she remembered the important things.

Her own angry scream.

“Leave her alone!” a declaration of independence.

Her father’s screams--his dampened and steaming back. The penne noodles on the floor.

The most painful memory: her mother screaming “Desi! What is wrong with you?!” Her father never hit her, her mother, or her sister ever again. Instead, he found lovers to impose the violence of his fist or mere presence upon. Dad came home when he wanted. And Mom became Desi’s silent aggressor--resentful that her daughter had disrupted her normal.

That year, Desiray learned that she was alone. But she refused to be helpless.

____________________

Years Later

The First Order base was interesting, to say the least. A Galaxy History major, Desiray responded to a holonet posting for a ‘Historical Transcriber’ with the base. The main part of her job was to transcribe the data and recordings of old (or aging) droids and other receptacles of archival information. The “second” part of her job came later--when she quickly grew tired of hauling droids to the repair department when one failed her. Soon, she learned how to repair them herself, and became an unofficial repairwoman of all droids.

It was her second day on the job when she sat down in the cafeteria. After two bites into her sandwich, she felt someone staring at her. Whatever kind of Spidey senses or intuition she was "gifted” at birth, she considered it more of a curse than a blessing. Sometimes it came in handy, being “wise” or “empathetic”, as she’d been described. But other times, she just wanted to eat a porg breast sandwich without ~feeling something~.

Her eyes scanned the room--slowly and inconspicuously--until they landed on a tall figure dressed in black, talking to an officer. But he was looking at her. She knew he was.

She’d seen this guy on her first day and noticed that people moved hastily out of his way. If you asked her, she’d seen scarier. She placed her focus back onto her sandwich.

“Grown ass man walkin’ around in a Party City costume,” she thought to herself.

Desiray glanced up again and the man was gone.

Kylo Ren.

She’d heard that “Kylo” was his title and not even his first name. A “mysterious” type. Whatever.

One day, she’d happen to have been walking past the control room when he was throwing one of his infamous tantrums. She just shook her head.

“What a fucking brat.”

Suddenly, Desiray felt her arm being yanked and her body being pulled into the control room. Ren towered over her and pushed her against a wall.

“Do you have something you’d like to say to me...” His head tilted down to look at her identification badge. Or her tit. Or both. “Parker?”

“If I did, I would have said it,” Desiray spat back. She pushed against his chest, but he didn’t budge an inch.

“Every time you walk past me, something bitchy runs across that brain of yours. Why?”

“I suppose your bitchiness just rubs off on everyone, Mr. Ren. Now, can I go to my office?”

Desiray couldn’t see his face. But she knew he was smirking. A deadly combination of anger and lust radiated from his flesh and past all of the shit he was wearing.

“A little girl pretending to be tough. We’ll see how long that lasts...”

And with that, Ren walked out of the control room, leaving Desiray standing against the wall--catching her breath and calming the beat of her heart. A beat of fear mixed with anger.

One month into her new job. Almost two months in a new city--about 25 miles away from her hometown...

...and she’d already come across yet another man who needed another pot of hot water thrown against his back.

#desiray rp #yourpaterson #leather-and-embers

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oingo233 · 4 years ago

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By The Lake* Part Five

Summary: A family friend offers you a place to stay to get away from an abusive past. Her home is a place that you are familiar with, an old town with a large lake you spent many days in. You went there years ago for one full summer, where you became close friends with a very young Daryl Dixon. You two were inseparable until you had to leave. But now you’re back, escaping from a past much like his. You will need to weave your way through the town’s problematic people, your own problems, and above all the confusing Dixon. Will you two find your way back to each other again? Or will he push you further away? And above all, will your past cease to haunt you?

Part one * Part Two * Part Three * Part Four

Pairing: Young Daryl Dixon X Reader

Warnings: Mentions of abuse and violence(potential triggers), cussing, more mature themes(not smut or anything tho), slow burn romance, described wounds and injuries

Authors note: I don’t own the character Daryl Dixon, he belongs to the creators of The Walking Dead. This fic talks about abuse, and the terrible reality involved to spread awareness about the matter, not to romanticize it. ps. in this chapter we get hints at what really happened the last summer Daryl and (Y/N) spent together, which might be confusing at first but next chapter we’ll get more inisght to that. There is also super cute and sad angst between the two as their pasts are finally revealed more to each other. This chapter is just cute to me, I hope y’all enjoy!

Word Count: 3.1k

*******************************************************************************************

It has been a week and 3 days since I have last seen Daryl. He was never in Marks garage, not wandering through town, not by the lake, not anywhere in sight. All though sometimes at night, when I’m drifting off you sleep, if I’m lucky, I’ll hear Daryl's motorcycle as he drives through the night. I always wonder where he’s off to, towards home or away? So much has changed, it was hard to know much about him nowadays.

It was one of those lucky nights as his engine roared to life, but something felt wrong. I checked the time on my phone. 2:28 am. What the hell? Where is he going to at this hour? Going to raise hell with his brother? Or get him out of it? I shook my head, and cuddled deeper into the pillow although it did nothing to calm my mind. But it wasn’t my place to worry about him, we aren’t friends. Daryls bitter words from our fight often circle around my head at night. But so does the day he saved me. He still cares for me, he as to, right? I wouldn’t be ready to fight 3 tough looking guys for no one? But he did, for me. Maybe not everything has changed.

The hum of the motorcycle sounds the closest it has ever been. I get lost in my own thoughts and soon notice the quite of the night. No more engine accompanying the crickets and owls in the dead of night. Well, where ever he is...I hope he is safe, I think. My thoughts start to fade out, as my tiredness sinks in and sleep takes over.

Knock! Knock! Knock! Knock!

I wake with a start, my heart leaps to my throat and I can feel my fast heart beat. Someone was at my door, knocking quickly and loudly.

Knock! Knock! “Damn it, wake up!” Someone whispers from the other side of the door. They didn’t sound like Cherry, Mark or the kids. Could it be Carter? The thought alone replaces my beating heart in my throat with bile. I seal my lips shut and fight back the need to gag, a nervous tick if you will.

Knock knock! I quickly throw the covers off of me, and stand on shaking knees. Apprehensively, I grab the bat by my bed and creep towards the door. One more knock sounds and then I hear it. “(Y/N), please...”The voice was shaky, and soft. I know that voice! I unlock the door and reveal the person behind it.

“Daryl?” Even if I had a hunch on who it was, seeing him before me here still was surprising. Even more surprising was the way he stood. His one arm draped over his waist, hunched over. The other had blood trailing down his forearm from his knuckles, as it was raised in the air ready to knock again. In the dead of night it was hard to see the full extent of his injuries.

I drop my bat and turn on the porch lights. “Omg Daryl! What happened?.” I panic. His face had more bruises than flesh, and blood leaked from his lip and nose, covering the front of his shirt. He squinted at the light and did something I last expected him to do. He collapsed in my arms. The weight of him nearly had us both on the floor, but I steadied myself and wrapped my arms around him. My hands slid up and down his back, they were met with bloody welts. I raised my hands so they weren’t touching him at all, and tucked my forearms under his sweaty armpits to lead him inside. I walk the short distance from the front door, to my bed and lay him down on it so his back was facing the ceiling.

He pushed his arms up under him and tried to get up. I lightly grab his bicep and push him back down. “Don’t move.” I say softly, taking in his hurt expression.

“I’m not gettin’ your sheets dirty...” He mumbles.

“I don’t give a damn about my fucking sheets. Let me help you, that’s why you came here right?” I don’t mean to sound so harsh, but seeing him like this scared me and he was only putting himself in more pain trying to be polite right now.

“Ya said if I needed anythin’...” He trialed off, clearly embarrassed. He never was the one to ask for help, he saw it as weakness, almost like defeat.

“I know, I’m glad you came here.” I can’t stop myself. I reach out and comb back the hair from his eyes, running my fingers through his head of hair. He closes his eyes and relaxes into the pillow, flinching when I go to do it again, before visibly relaxing even more. Blood from his lip dribbles down onto my pillow and I frown. How could someone do this to him?

My heart breaks in two, and I hold back my tears. He’d see it as pity and push me away. I’ve never ever seen Daryl this beaten up, he won’t even let me check out a bruise. It must have been real bad for him to come here directly after being hurt. I scratch the base of his neck softly, thinking to myself how in the hell was I supposed to help him. His lips parted and a sigh escaped them, I don’t know how long we were sitting like that but in that time Daryl has fallen asleep. I smile to myself and pull my hand back. Taking him in all the way.

I always wanted to see him in my bed with me, whether we were cuddling, laughing, or other fun things ;). But never would I have ever wanted to see him in this condition. His shirt was torn and through the rips I can see raised, irritated welts of skin, and some deeper marks turned into gashes. Blood running down his tan skin. His face was beaten badly, and his knuckles were cracked open, leaving blood down his arms.

I needed to get him cleaned and bandaged up, but all the supplies were in the house. I had nothing. This could prove difficult. But it needed to me done. I had to sneak into the home of those who are helping me, and steal their medical supplies. No, borrow, I think to myself, I’m borrowing things to help my friend which they would surely approve of. And I’ll replace everything I took in the morning.

With that plan in mind I stood up and turned to walk out the door but a hand wraps gently wraps around my hand, squeezing it.

“You leavin’?” My heart leaped at his broken voice. I crouch down and make eye contact with him, half his face sunken into the pillow, the other half facing me. When I speak my voice is comforting, despite the fear and seriousness I feel when I look at his injuries.

“No Daryl,” I run my thumb across his knuckles which luckily this hand was clear of cuts. “I have to get a few things for us. But it won’t take too long, and I’m coming right back.” He drops my hand and sits up slowly, holding his side again, face warped with pain before settling into a stony expression.

“If you’re gonna tell em’, I’m leavin’ and you have nothing to worry bout.” He goes to stand up but I block him.

“I won’t tell them Daryl. Nobody is going to know but us. I just want to help you that’s all. It’ll be between us if that is what you want.” He nods once, and continues to stand there, looking awkward. I hold in a chuckle, and help him sit down again.

He watches me leave, as I walk out the door and to Cherry’s house, thinking of what I’m going to do. Do I even know how to clean all of Daryl’s wounds? I grimace at the thought of hurting him more, in a hopeless attempt to help him. But then a grim thought crossed my mind, of course I know how to treat wounds, I’ve had most of them myself. I arrive at their front door and try it. It was locked. I curse under my breath and check the back door. Praying to whatever god is up there, I try the handle. For a second I think it might just work, its turning, but then it stops abruptly and I almost scream into the night. Locked. What now?

I can’t go to town, I don’t have a car. I don’t have first aide in the cabin, and I’d rather die than disturb or “borrow” from the Hendersons. No, this was the only way. But how? In my train of frantic thought I bring my thumb up and bite it. Quickly I retract my thumb and spit on the ground. Daryl’s blood was all over my hands from where I carried him. Suddenly, the answer to all my problems presented itself.

I run around to the front of the house and knock frantically, putting a pained expression on. Mark opens the door, his eyes bags prominent in the moonlight and his half sleep state. He looked like a zombie. I felt terrible for waking him, but the thought of Daryl back at the cabin keeps my plan in action.

“Oh Mark! Thank god. I hurt myself...” Oh shit, I haven’t thought about this all the way. “uh, when unpacking and the pocket knife slipped. I uh, cut my palm.” He bought my rubbish lie, and glanced down at my hands. Even in the darkness, the blood on my hands were hard to miss. His eyes widen and he ushers me inside.

“Jesus. You’re on the verge of bleeding out!” His voice seemed much higher than before, panicked. I shrug, clearly I wasn’t, but Mark seemed convinced I was in grave danger. “We need to call someone. Cherry!” He yells into the night. Two lights down the hallway turn on and I hold back a long string of curses, this wouldn’t work. I wasn’t even cut and now everyone was going to come and take a look. Mark glances uneasily at my hands and closes his eyes shut. He chuckles. “I’m not very good with things like this. Blood is...well I don’t really like it. Cherry is better at this stuff anyway. Cherry!” He calls again. Cherry rushes down the hall, pulling her arm through her robe. Her hair sticking up, and matted, she looked just as tired as Mark. Behind her, I can see Monty stick his head out his door. He gives me a shy wave, making me smile. I go to wave but can’t for Cherry grabbed my hand.

I pull it back to my chest and fake pain. I wince and give her a weak smile. “It hurts, it would be best if I cleaned it myself. I just don’t have any first aide at the cabin.” She puts a hand to her mouth and closes her eyes for a few seconds.

“(Y/N), I am so sorry.” She hits Marks arm, who looks pale. “How could we have forgotten to give her first aide, she’s by the lake for christs sake.” She turns away and rushes in and out of the bathroom. She hands me a red kit, and frowns at me. “I’m sorry, we literally bought you one and totally forgot to give it to you. Are you sure you can do it yourself?” This plan has worked out better than I thought, I think to myself quite amazed.

“Uhm, yeah. Done this a hundred times.” I laugh to myself. “And don’t be sorry at all, everything worked out like it should and I have it when I most need it!” I swing the kit around, not sure how to retract back to the cabin. “Well, thank you so much, and I’m so sorry for disturbing you.” I give Cherry and Mark a kiss on the cheek and run out of the house like a bat out of hell.

I approach the Cabin and see through the window as Daryl’s face lights up slightly when he sees me coming. He goes to open the door but stops short when his back no doubt holds him back. I run inside and open the first aide kit.

“Careful! No need to be moving around, just sit still.” He puffs out air, some hair that fell in front of his eyes fly back. He eyes the first aide and gives me a small smile.

“Thanks.” That made me stop. I can’t help it, a teasing smile breaks through.

“Did thee Daryl Dixon just say thank you?” I giggle, he rolls his eyes at me, cracking a small grin too.

“Nah, you hearing things.” We both laugh lightly, Daryl slowly reaches over for the kit. I stop him, giving him a questioning look.

“I know what I’m doing, been here before.”He says. I place the kit in my lap and give him a look.

“So have I.” He sits back, eyebrows furrowed. His mouth opens lightly, I know he wants to say something, but his words fell short as he looked into my eyes. We shared the same look, the one you get carved into you from hands of abuse. Daryl clenches his fists and draws his lips back, like a dog growling.

“Carter.” He states, venomously. I give a stiff nod and we didn’t mention it further although it seemed like Daryl wanted to. I grabbed a towel and soaked it in water. I slowly approach Daryl and stand between his legs, he looks softly up at me from his position on the bed.

“May I?” He swallows thickly, and wordlessly gives me permission with a nod of his head. I tuck my pointer finger under the towel, and use it to wipe blood from his upperlip. He winces and his hands shoot up, grabbing at my hips. My movements falter at his touch, his large hands, calloused and rough, but so soft against my bare hip. My pajama consisted of a large shirt, and shorts like underwear.

“‘m sorry.” He mumbles, hands falling back at his side. I continue wiping the blood off of his face softly.

“It’s okay, you can hold me if it helps.” I smirk down at him, he rolls his eyes and I feel his disbelieving smile against the towel. Truth was though, I loved him holding me like that, I wanted him too. We were like that for a while, until his face was clean. I placed a disinfection on all the open cuts on his face, and an adhesive band-aide. When I’m done, I inspect his face. Even all roughed up, he was the most handsome man I’ve ever seen.

“This your dad?” I ask, after a while of inspecting him, he was inspecting me too, his small smile dropped, as well as his gaze.

“Yeah, my ain’t good fer nothin’ pop beats me. That what ya wanna hear?” His face contorts with anger. “That I ain’t nothin’ to him but a beatin’ bag, a disappointment.” He fist the bloody sheets of my bed. “That I ain’t nothin’.” His voice cracks and tears spill out of his eyes. He wipes at them angrily but they won’t stop. A sob breaks through his lips, and his body shudders. I wipe his tears away for him, and dab at my own.

“Daryl...You are so many things. So many incredible things.” He’s coughing on his sobs now, head in his hands. The sound broke me. What could I say to make his pain go away? What could I do to take it from him? “You’re more than what your dad thinks of you. You-you don’t need him...you have me. And I think the world of you.”My own voice cracks. I don’t know what to say that would reach him in the way it needs to. So I wrap my hands around his neck and pull him in for a hug. His arms instantly snake around me and hold on for dear life, his head tucked into my stomach. His cries stop for a second and I hold him tighter.

“Ya left me too...”He whispers, almost like he didn’t dare to say it, but he did. My grip looseness, the guilt from so many years ago hitting me full force. His head shifts and his eyes meet mine, his beautiful blue eyes. I expected to see anger, but all I saw was hurt, and vulnerability. Tears were drifting out of them slowly, and they glistened in the wet sheen. I hold my breath.

“Ya left me there in the woods. I thought I lost ya forever that day. The stupid fuckin’ kiss.” He mumbles the last part to himself. His hands bunches the fabric of my shirt, before he releases and stands with a pain filled sigh. His hand lightly cups my cheek, I hold on to it. A sad smile returns to his face, almost bitter. “Ya should of ran when I held ya like this (Y/N). If ya were gonna run anyway, then ya should have ran the first damn day we met.” His hand drops down the base of my neck, he traces circles down the base of it slowly, inches above my chest. It was silent for a few moments, heat and emotion trapped between our two bodies. “When you were wearing that pretty lil necklace, we lost in the lake days after.” His smile fades again as he drops his hand and picks up something from the kit. Dabbing at his knuckles with the towel. Ignoring me. He never was so open, I didn’t expect it to last very long. I regain my voice and grab his forearm, making him look at me.

“It wasn’t a stupid kiss Daryl. I was a stupid girl. But I never planned on running from you, not even the first day we met.” As a small chuckle slips from my sad demeanor, he looks at me. Shyly from his lashes, watching me speak, hoping it was true. “I should have never ran. Like I said, I always thought the world of you.” He stops messing with his hand and stares at me for a long while. He steps forwards and hugs me, a real hug. His arms wrapped around my shoulders, my head tucked into his chest. I hug him down my his butt, not wanting to hurt his back even more. I felt deflated. His lips trace my ear as he whispers into it.

“I was a sorry fool the day ya left.” His words echoed in my head all night, as we laid in silence. Him sprawled on my bed as I patched up and cleaned his back. He played with my hand, as the other raced through his hair, lulling him to sleep.

“Goodnight Daryl.” I whisper into his ear, giving him a soft kiss by his hairline before lying next to him. I was answered with a snore. I feel asleep watching him, and thinking of all that has changed, and all that has yet remained the same.

#daryl dixon imagine #daryl fanfiction #daryl imagine #daryl x reader #daryl dixon #young daryl dixon #twd #twd fic #twd fandom #twd fanfiction #the walking dead #the walking dead fanfiction #daryldixon #angst #romance #teen romance

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kaypeace21 · 5 years ago

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This is just a quick ramble... nothing too deep . But am I the only one intrigued with the fact that us ( the audience) see Jonathan in a very different light given our skewed perspective? We see Jonathan at his best because we see him most often with his family . We see him with Will being patient, kind , protective, optimistic, and cheerful as he dotes on him. And as he helps raise Will he emotionally and financially assists his mom and is generally very considerate of her anxiety issues. But there Is a very stark contrast to how Jonathan behaves with the vast majority of people vs those he’s closest with. And we can see some very apparent issues he still has. To most people they only see Jonathan as quiet , unsociable, having trust issues, and being very jaded, aloof and intimidating . (And I wouldn’t be surprised if Will has similar walls up when it comes to most people outside his circle). Examples-

- “don’t take it personally ok. I don’t like most people.He’s in the vast majority”

-(yells at a crowd) : “yeah, shows over!”

- (about Jonathan): “I don’t think he speaks.” , “Jonathan Byers maybe he’s not the pretentious creep everyone says he is.” , “Maybe he killed him.”

- “ I guess I’d rather observe people then - Nancy: “talk to them?” Jon: “ Yeah, I know it’s weird... it’s just sometimes people don’t always say what they’re really thinking.” (aka Lonnie who lies and constantly gaslights, and who Jonathan literally calls out for saying disingenous things).

- says “let’s go Nancy. it’s not worth it .” and ignores Steve when he calls him a ‘fag’. But stops dead in his tracks when says “ you’re a screwup just like your father” and insults his mom and brother.Then completely out of character proceeds to go into a rage and doesn’t stop beating him despite the police sirens and Tommy and Nancy telling him to stop. Then after accidentally punching a cop he takes one last kick at Steve.

* is afraid to socialize and doesn’t know how to interact with others at a party since he’s not good with strangers and doesn’t speak much . “Kiss?” girl stares disbelieving . “The band ! “ Girl laughs: “nice costume.” Jon: “ I’m going as a guy who hates parties.”

-Bob: “I feel like I’m breaking through with them.Well... not so much Jonathan he’s a tough cookie to crack.” Joyce shrugs her shoulders in agreement.

- “ like there’s this weight you carry around you. all the time! I feel it too.”

- Murray (in s2) “trust issues am I right? something to do with your dad?”

- “is that why you don’t have any friends ?”

* in the shed , Joyce and Mike tell their happiest memories involving Will. And Jonathan brings up the day their dad left. You want to unpack that? -_-

- “The real world sucks , get used to it like the rest of us!”

*at work doesn’t socialize with any of his coworkers and stays in the red photo room alone just like he did at school in s1. Showing he hasn’t made much progress when it comes to his social issues.

-“My dad doesn’t earn 6 figures! Hell he isn’t even around . Mortgage! College tuition! Things you don’t care about only because you don’t have to!

-“You really are your mother’s son.” *smiles “what?”

* Jonathan gives the baseball bat to steve and gives Lonnie’s gun to Nancy. (Because Lonnie taught both his sons how to shoot and play baseball) . Then proceeds to use an axe in s3 (like Joyce did in s1). Trying to symbolically reject his dad’s toxic influence . Opposite to Will who is referred to as “Lonnie’s kid” : is much more proficient with guns than Jon , and who used his baseball bat to destroy his safe place (which was based on one of his drawings) and was made after Lonnie left. Specifically destorying castle byers in the rain (like the weather the day it was built) . And after Will realizes he has feelings for mike and after insulting himself and ripping up his drawings . All despite admitting he doesn’t like baseball. And after Will said this...Jon told him not to act the way his father wanted him to .Not to mention another William in the series does something similar : copying a shitty abusive dad .

I don’t know. I’m just looking forward to the possibility this will be addressed. Since the s4 movies allude to the fact Jonathan is going to struggle finacially, and emotionally , along with being forced out of his comfort zone , and trying to find his identity outside of being a surrogate father to Will. But also trying to juggle being a young adult and being that paternal figure for him. Also Jonathan’s backstory is sad and dark af. And I just want to give him a hug... and therapy. Like ...Yikes Jonathan has some issues that will definitely be brought up and he’s going to do things that are ... not healthy for him 😬. I just can’t wait till the s4 movie lists are done and I can rewatch the series . cause if I’m right. His plot in s4 is going to be epic and it’ll be the much needed character focus of his psyche we’ve been waiting for. Despite it being dark and uncomfortable to watch at times.

#jonathan byers #willl byers #stranger things

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