#and I've already been really anxious lately
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milkyberryjsk · 8 months ago
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i graduated ^__^
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outeremissary · 7 months ago
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9 People You Want to Know Better
Tagged by @arendaes, thanks :)
Three Ships
I feel like I always list the same stuff on this section, haha. Same time, I can't really seem to think of anything better right now when I'm trying. Maybe it's just my energy tonight. Uh, I can just list what I consider my main pairs in the last three games with romances I've played...? I guess?
Balthazar + Tristian. Or also with Vio. Doodling them a lot lately... I miss them.
Carmen + Arushalae. There's a Galfrey situation that intersects with this as well but I think living with someone goes a long way towards winning a love triangle. Whatever the hell winning means here. Tbh everyone loses
Asperia/Kasander + unfortunately, that archduke I really do want dead for real. Once wasn't enough.
Last Song
Catch Me If You Can - Jhariah (Spotify). Someone I drew something for on Art Fight had this listed as a character theme, so I've been looping it a lot... it's really good. I really should listen to more of Jhariah's music.
Last Movie
Hm. I.... don't know? I haven't been watching a lot of movies. I wanted to see I Saw the TV Glow, but before I knew it had left theaters. I'd like to watch movies again, I think.
Currently Reading
When I remember that I should be reading, Wuthering Heights. I've actually never read it before. I got bored halfway through Jane Eyre when I was 13 and lost all interest in gothic romances after that. ^^;;
Currently Watching
Akuma-kun! The 2023 one on Netflix. It's the show my friend and I are watching together right now. He insisted I had to watch it because it had an evil angel... we saw the angel today!! I'm happy. Homoerotic, fourteen year old fujoshi Emi would have totally lost it for this.
Currently Eating
Nothing. Getting hungry again though.
Currently Craving
I dunno... something fried? In the abstract, a little more self assurance.
Favorite Color
Blue. Deep blue. I've always been fond of the Copenhagen blue that I've used for Caina's scarf and one of Balthazar's coats, and the indigo I do a lot of my lines with.
Favorite Flavor
Chocolate.
Current Obsession
Anxiously checking the Art Fight website tbh. It's not good for me. I just keep getting worried that I've somehow made art that someone really hates of their character, or that I'm putting a lot into projects that no one will ever see. Haha.
Last Thing I Googled
.... well, now that we're at this point in this, it's Copenhagen blue. Because I wanted to check if it was a real name ^^;;
Favorite Season
Fall. It's got the best temperatures and most consistent weather. I like when the leaves change as well. The dry leaves on the ground are really comforting.... they make good sounds and are nice to lay in.
Skill I'd Like to Learn
Painting. Watercolors, ideally. Or digital art.
Best Advice
Jeez, I don't know a lot of life advice. I guess the best art advice I know is "draw whatever makes you want to keep drawing." Recently an artist I really respect also said something like "when you're starting out, just go ahead and copy whatever you like. Don't trace because you'll learn slower, but if there's something you like, try your best to imitate it." I think that can be good advice too. I guess my personal advice is also "Just do it however you know you can get it done." I used to get really hung up on doing things the "right" way in order to finish them, and because it took so long and I felt so pressured on the later steps I never finished anything. I hardly ever got to what I considered the halfway mark then. It didn't make me feel good about what I was doing. So I started doing things messier and more haphazard, whatever would get to the end I wanted to reach fastest. And I think I grew a lot more like that. I definitely drew a lot more art I was proud of and happy to show other people. I guess that also loops around to advice I've heard somewhere else though ^^;; Just to do the parts of the process that you want to finish. Your sketch can be your final lines if you hate doing line art, who cares. You can learn a way to do it like that.
We've hit the limit of how many times I can tag people on posts in a day without feeling very anxious unfortunately, so if anyone wants to be my guest etc. but I don't have it in me right now ^^;;
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andromeda3116 · 1 year ago
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me to myself, currently: other people aren't obsessing over your social mistakes like you are other people aren't obsessing over your social mistakes like you are other people aren't obsessing over your social mistakes like you are other people aren't obsessing over your social mistakes like you are
also me: obviously they have all begun to hate me
#hey remember that post from this morning about ocd and obsessive thinking?#i have been struggling lately and sinking into my own head and that makes me very. weird.#and not like. fun quirky weird.#it's off-putting weird. obnoxious as i overcompensate for my anxiety that's screaming at me to hide#i used to do that as a child. i would just hide when i felt like nobody wanted me around.#i would think to myself '' i know when i'm not wanted'' bc i see the awkwardness in the fake laughs and feel the just-too-long silences#the shared glances after i speak#and i see the ranks closing and shutting me out#and it is very very hard to discern if it's real or in my head#between ''i'm just paying attention to the subtle tells'' and ''you can't read minds and you do filter everything through your own mood''#so it's hard to tell if they really think i'm obnoxious or if i've already decided that they do and so i'm seeing what i expect#sometimes it does end up being undeniable when i do end up getting shut out of the chat#but is it just a self-fulfilling prophecy? is it my desperation to not be annoying that makes me annoying?#is it my own distancing from people because i think they hate me that makes them close me out because they think i don't want to be there?#i don't know. i've never known. this spiral has me and it's a whirlpool dragging me into the deeps.#i've spent my whole life so terribly anxious that i was misdiagnosed with asthma as a child because i was always struggling to breathe#it's gotten... better... sort of. i've learned to fight the urge to hide but i'm still left with the fear that pushed me to do it#mental illness#anxiety#depression
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salontiwon · 11 days ago
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- 𝙿𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖𝚜 ִ ֶ 𓂃
[nonidol!hubby jw x fem!wifey]
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࣪𓏲ּ ⊹ ˑ ִ ֶ 𓂃
Summary: [you and jw are married, and lately you've been feeling insecure/left out cuz he's been spending so much time with him co-workers, staying late at the company and work "parties", he hasn't even slept with you in bed for a long while, it made you feel less specially bcs you're unemployed and just his housewife, your intense insecurities made you think that you're just there for his pleasure, in a heated argument he says some words that were heavy on your heart, he felt guilty and decided to take a break with you away from this world]
Warnings: unprotected sex, breeding, fingering, creampie, cock stroking, pet names? (Baby idk), insecure/paranoid reader,smoking, overstimulation, idk what else tell me if I forgot or didn't know abt something
Note: I can say this is my first (I've been writing tho) but it's my first time posting in this acc and I'm kinda embarrassed/anxious idk why, hope nobody judges and if there's any mistakes I'm willing to receive corrections and education from anyone who comes across my work, thank you.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT FOR YOUR OWN GOOD OR IMMA GENUINELY CRY.
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Waiting on the couch, finally deciding to confront your husband about his insanely busy time lately, despite knowing it even before marriage that his job as an important part of that company will automatically take most of his time.
biting on your nails as your insecurities race in your head, like you're hearing another version of yourself making fun of you, look how the "sweet" husband is making you wait, he's out at work parties and god knows where, but all you can do is sit here and clean his dirt.
as the door clicks open, you sit up without a second thought, leaning on the wall at the end of the entry hall "jungwon we have to talk" you say firmly before walking back to the living room
with a loose tie and a few buttons of his shirt undone he follows you, "now? But sweetie I'm so tire-" , "jungwon I said we need to talk" you repeat, making his frustration grow slightly, "and what's so important that you're willing to take the time I should be resting in to 'talk' huh?" He says, and your sensitive heart already started beating faster, scared of not handling this discussion well.
"where are you staying till this hour this last period? Yes you'd say at work but even work won't give you the right to leave me like that!" Your voice trembles, and yes to keep strong, you thought raising your voice slightly would make you feel strong but it only fueled the fire of his frustration and exhaustion, "really?! Are you questioning my loyalty now?! You knew what you were getting into the day I knelt to propose to you!" He yells back.
"I'm not questioning your loyalty I'm just saying, whatever it is, you shouldn't have been THIS absent, it's like I'm single!" You argue.
"'it's like I'm single' my ass, darling please stop being so paranoid I'm too tired to deal with your insecurities right now" he walks to the bedroom, taking his clothes off and slipping under the blanket.
"really jungwon!! You're infuriating! Get up and let's discuss this!" You walk to bed madly throwing the blanket off his body, he sits up but with a deadly gaze this time.
"oh really now you wanna be like this huh?! Okay guess what, I didn't tell you to be here 24/7 , I wouldn't mind if you went to work anywhere and stayed all you wanted doing your job! But you can't force me to drop everything and come running to your arms because of your little insecurities probably about some stretch marks and a massive inferiority complex! You chose to be a housewife then be it! I don't have to fucking pay!" He stands up, his pillow in his hand and a blanket he grabs from the closet in the time you were frozen there, goosebumps all over your skin and tears threatening to fall. It was like a slap on the face making you feel ashamed, embarrassed, hurt and even more frustrated.
he walks down to the living room, falling easily asleep on the couch, signaling that the exhaustion he was going through wasn't as satisfying as you thought it was for him. You slip under the blanket crying yourself to sleep, feeling slightly guilty for ruining his rest, yet you feel hurt yourself.
The night then passes quietly and so are the next few days, awkwardness growing between you two, both feeling guilty but obviously his guilt was greater, he'd occasionally buy your favourite snacks and put them in the drawers without talking to you, or asking about you, above all the stress he was under, your expression that night couldn't leave his mind, how could he say such a cruel thing to such a sweet little soul, he understood your frustration because from where you saw it, it was just the surface, he only thinks about how he left his exhaustion get the best of him, he had the perfect way to gain your smile back but he still has to work on it a little more.
-
Your eyes slowly fluttering open, you feel a gentle hum, like a car's engine, and after a few blinks and checks, you finally hear
"finally awake?" You feel a big hand on your thigh waking you up completely.
"what's that..my head's spinning" you place your palms on your temples.
"you'll be fine, just lean back and take a deep breath" jungwon smiles pushing you against the back of the car cushion gently by your chest, and as minutes pass, you feel better as you get distracted by the view of the rainy weather and nature surrounding you both and running back as the car paces forward, you even forgot to ask the questions that were in your mind, with your head resting against the window, the sadness started creeping through your calm heart, you immediately start feeling frustrated again at being stuck with him in the car, "how did I get here and where are we going?!" You look at the car's clock, noticing it's 6:00 am, where the hell could he be taking you at this hour. "Do you trust me?" He asks, "jungwon answer me and stop-" he cuts you off "I said, do you trust me?!" He turns to face you just seconds before refocusing on the road, you can't help but nod, after all, an argument won't immediately kill the trust you had for him, "yes I do, so stop being ridiculous and answer my questions" you insist in a slightly annoyed tone making a reassuring smile spread across his face, even tho deep inside you, you knew it's whether a surprise or a way for him to reconnect with you, you wanted an answer.
"just relax, I'm kidnapping my wife is it illegal now?" He smiles making you scoff, you were still so frustrated, but at least seeing this side of him, now you know it really is something good for you, taking you to a restaurant or something, just before you get distracted again by the view and you find yourself out in Dreamland.
-
At the slight trembling of the car and the sounds of the wheels crashing the hard dirt rocks, you wake up again, your eyes immediately at the clock and they widen, it's now 11 am! You really slept for another five hours in such a position , you look through the window at the pine trees everywhere then look back at him.
"where are you taking me you've been driving for hours! My back is sore" just after hushing you, a wooden, modest house in the middle makes its way to your sight, making you let out a "eh?" , A wide smile you tried to suppress taking over your confused features and a slight flush of embarrassment, cuz after all, you're still hurt and frustrated.
His own face breaks into a grin, brushing your hair back to take a better look, "looks like my girl's excited" , your blush deepens and you push his hand away but gently, "stop it...tell me where we are instead"
without answering, he's stepping out of the car, rushing to the trunk under this heavy rain, he carries the bags he prepared last night, the ones you saw him preparing and thought he was leaving you before you fell into a strange slumber, while he's heading towards the front door, he stops outside the passenger's seat side, knocking at your window with one busy hand.
"afraid of rain?" He jokes, his voice muffled by the door and the sound of rain drops surrounding you, making you shake your head before opening the door and stepping out yourself.
"You look like a maniac" you take one of the lighter bags from his grip.
"oh madam mature, we used to kiss under skies like that". He smirks again, his words making your heart skip a beat at the memory.
-
With that you finally are stepping inside this house, welcomed by a warm, well tidied up place and the natural fragrance of pine trees surrounding the place outside, the sound of the heavy rain again gets muffled letting both your ears buzzing, you drop the bags in the entry and step in, looking at the modest place, old fashioned couches and handmade details, everywhere you look you'd see a frame, a vase, a rug, and it makes you feel so warm inside, it's nothing like those modern almost empty houses that look nothing like your inner soul, a fireplace at the end of the living room making you mumble
"wow..." You turn back around to face him, he was ruffling his damp hair in the little mirror by the entry and fixing it, before smiling and walking up to you, "like it?" He asked, wrapping his arms around your waist, you immediately tense, you were still frustrated with him, still insecure and slightly embarrassed that this all might be just because he noticed the dilemma you were in. to play it off, you step away taking one of the discarded blankets on the couch ,that was part of the house aesthetic and you knew it, but you're too nervous to play the knowing girl, "god.. why's this here.." You whisper nervously like ‘to yourself‚ making him roll his eyes, a flush creeping to his ears at how you pulled away but he tried not to focus on it for now, but again he didn't give up , grabbing your busy hand, "let me show you the rest", you nod with a blank stare and follow him.
Walking up a few rugged stairs, it was a larger space, with two closed doors and an open one, he steps inside, "here's the kitchen" he turns to face you but you were already stunned, looking at the small fridge, the colored napkins on the counter, the small window and the colored, decorated plates, unlike the plain ones you had back at home, it was like the kitchen you always wanted, since you were a little girl even, the sight makes you squeeze his hand excitedly, and he excitedly responds by stepping out to show you more, he opens one of the closed doors, and there it was, the cozy, warm bedroom with printed walls, and a bed in the center with a soft thick mattress on it, covered with soft printed sheets and pillowcases and a thick blanket, a big window with the incredible view of the rainy weather outside, a beautiful, old fashioned wardrobe with beautiful carved details. You continue looking around in pure awe before he breaks the silence again.
"I'm going to bring the bags so we can make ourselves home"
You turned to ask but he was already walking down the stairs, you were again left with unanswered questions and a frustrating confusion.
Ignoring the awkwardness of the situation he left to do so as you continued checking the place, time passed and you two organised almost everything, showering and changing into comfortable clothes, the sky darkens and the house gets warm when he turns on the fireplace, your housewife and caring nature kicking in, heading to that kitchen of your dreams wanting to cook something, he stepped in behind you, "need help?" He asked, "of course I do, I don't know where anything is" you manage to make him chuckle, immediately start opening the drawers and closing, you two delve into the task and it turns to awkward jokes and forced giggles, you were still deeply hurt and paranoid about his love for you, and he was still thinking about how he could envelope you in his arms again.
Dinner, cleaning, joking, organising, it all passed now and it was kinda too platonic too. you're sitting alone by the fireplace with a cup of cinnamon tea in your hands, he was sitting on the couch across from you, his laptop on his lap completing the final point of his work as he said.
"drink your tea before it gets cold" , without being told twice, he folds his laptop closed and places it beside him, grabbing his mug, you kinda regret telling him that, your paranoia making you think that you're forcing him to enjoy his time with you, you zone out on the fire that's eating on the woods, minutes passing as you both sip and sip, before he immediately places his mug down.
"y/n, I'm sorry..." He breaks the silence making your heart jump with his directness, but you feel guilty for making him feel bad for doing his job, so you just go with "sorry? For what..or what exactly?" You place your own cup down.
He moves to sit beside you, "we know each other too well to act this clueless.." his voice drops to a low murmur, and there you were, realising he's right, you're both mature, adults, grown ups enough to address the elephant in the room. Or at least FINALLY cuz you told him to do so multiple times before his hurtful words, but now that he isn't busy and you're both ready, it'll be more logical.
"you're right...but jungwon, I genuinely hate feeling triggered by you doing your job, I wanna change it but...I just can't and.." hearing your voice admitting that, it almost makes his eyes tear up, as you look into his eyes and you both admire the vulnerability in each other's features, he cups your face and leans closer.
"why are you so precious?" He couldn't hold himself back anymore, his nose tracing your jaw, you squeeze your eyes shut and take a shuddering breath.
"jungwon i.." you were stopped by his burning lips against yours, you immediately melted into the kiss, despite your insecurities eating at you, don't give in, it's just for his pleasure, just for his satisfaction, but fuck, you were deprived of his touch for too long to complain.
He pulls away to look into your eyes, his cinnamon scented breath brushing against your delicate features. "Can I fuck the doubts out of your little pretty head?" He asked, and a slight, shy smile spreads across your face, he's my husband, he chose me to be his, he picked me to be his wife, you think looking at him then back at the diamond ring on your finger "do you want to?" you whisper almost shyly.
"do I want to? Do you wanna find out if I want to?" He whispers with a smiley, deep voice, one of his hands unbuckling his belt, his face nuzzling your neck to make you smile and you did despite your attempts to fight it back, your thighs squeezed together as if trying to hold back the wetness that's uncontrollably leaking out of you as well, cuz with the way his breath is brushing against your skin, and the way he was licking and kissing on your neck? You couldn't say no. All you could do is let out a whisper of "I want it..."
Now with your legs around his waist and arms around his neck, you don't even notice the way to where you're now bouncing on that bed as he threw you.
Unbuckling his belt completely and baring himself before you, he straddles you and rips your pjs top off, tracing the outline of your bra.
"so insecure for what" he whispers as if in disbelief, mostly to himself, before turning you around like you weigh nothing to unclasp your bra, throwing it across the cozy room, followed by your undies, making you shiver.
and he can finally see the ass he loves , the stretch marks he adores,his palm connecting with your ass in a hard slap, making you whimper, reminding you both of the first night after your wedding party. He gets up again, grabbing a towel from the bathroom and lifting your hips, placing it beneath you.
He turns you back to face him, smiling up at you reassuringly, his big hands on your skin, it reminds you of all the times you let yourself go with him and ended up being a satisfied little thing nestled in his arms ,you uncontrollably smile back at him.
He kneels beside your legs, lifting one to rest on his shoulder, his finger gently running along your slit, "so wet bby" he murmurs, making you hiss and squeeze your eyes shut "am I?" You whisper, before whimpers start falling outta your mouth like a broken record when you feel his finger slipping inside your desperate hole, you open your eyes to look at him, seeing him too focused, his cock rock hard against his stomach as he fingers you, a second finger was already in, curling and stroking your g-spot with ease, as if he had a perfectly defined map of your body.
His lips kissing and nipping at your inner thigh, before he sniffs deeply, "you smell like love bby.." he murmurs, one hand gripping your thigh, and the other inside your pussy as you moan and squirm on that bed enjoying yourself, all your worries and frustration is aside for the moment when you're feeling this good.
You look down at him, before your other foot moves to his cock, stroking it gently, he buries his face deeper in your soft thigh as he groans "uh...fuck..." His fingers start moving faster before he looks down at you again. The sight makes him smile even in this hot mess, you both giving pleasure to each other, like the real couple that you are.
"you like that bby? Here?" He strokes a specific spot, making your eyes water as he looks down at you, teasing yet genuinely loving you, his fingers started moving even faster overwhelming that spot, before he feels a pressure pushing his fingers out, just as he does, they were followed by a heavy flow of your waters, and this sight made him leak down your toes, "fuck...Fuck you just squirted baby.." his hot seed spilling down your foot and your essences covering his abs.
you pant, covering your face before he straddles you again, kissing your neck, "are you alright baby?" He tried to peek at your beautiful, flushed face, little did he know you were giggling shyly behind those little hands "yea..", his eyebrows furrow in light curiosity and he pulls your hands away with his "look look who just made a mess and is now giggling .." he said, trying so hard not to ravish you, he wanted to be buried deep in you RIGHT THEN AND THERE, but he has to ask, knowing how paranoid you can get afterwards.
"..can you handle intercourse right now?" He asked, gripping a fistful of your hair and dragging your head back to bite on your neck and sniff, making you know that even if you say no, he'll never stop jerking off on that bed all night long because of you, you look down at his hard cock, making you bite your lip, his hand cups your pussy , caressing your sensitive folds, coaxing you to say yes, "is this a yes? You feel that pretty pussy asking for hubby's cock baby?" He coos, You moan, letting him know that it's a damn official yes and he didn't waste any more time, immediately pushing his tip inside your cunt followed by every inch, he groans in sync with your loud moan at the sensation of finally feeling this again.
Minutes pass and you're now a flushed, moaning mess with tears running down your temples and hair tousled in the sheets, the sight only making him go feral, changing angles every two minutes, hitting deeper and scratching every itch of yours, "you're so tight...fuck and you smell like pure debauchery right now baby.." a hot, panting laugh escapes him, as he continues his thrusts, but even in this situation, your insecurities were still there, and you decided to try to make him look at you, even tho you knew he becomes an animal in heat when he's like that, but it was as if your insecurities were challenging you...you mumble weakly "babe look at me .." but all you get back is two hungry, mad eyes "shut up not now...not when your pussy is feeling this nice baby..okay?."
His gaze softens SLIGHTLY as he looks at you and remembers you're his little lovely woman who's always paranoid and insecure, before sliding his middle and ring finger inside your mouth, he loved being surrounded by your soft inner flesh squeezing him everywhere, he loves feeling possessed by your warmth and giving it back to you, your pussy immediately clench around his cock when you feel his possession of you, the fierce love and lust making you spread your legs wider looking for a fourth orgasm when you feel your pussy getting this slippery, and when he sees the sight in front of him, his eyes almost pop out of his head, your legs wide open, your face flushed and tears all over it, hair in the sheets and your breasts bouncing.
the thought that his thrusts can't get stronger already gets forgotten when he starts fucking you senseless, the bed creaking and skin slapping and here is when your screams couldn't be held back anymore, you grip the sheets in your hands and scream his name nonstop "won... please don't stop..." Your voice making him grip your waist tighter, fucking you fast and hard , the strokes making you feel like your walls are about to explode due to the thick pressure pushing them apart , he reaches out, rubbing your clit, his gaze on his bulge beneath the skin of your lower abdomen.
you start gasping for air when the familiar lightness of your hips starts taking over you making you grind against him, your eyes rolling back as you let out a choked moan, your walls yet again squeezing his dick inside you, and this was all he needed to let go, his hips jerking deep inside you as he groans, his head tilted back and eyes squeezed shut, his hot seed planted deep in your precious inside as he gives a few more thrusts riding out your orgasms. You thought he'd stop now, but the thrusts to calm his twitching dick down only seemed to arouse him again, he didn't stop, and there you were overstimulated and still taking his cock like the good wife that you are, more tears spilling down but your worn out expression only makes him go insane.
His hands grip your breasts making you gasp, it was satisfying, even when you thought you can't cum a fifth time, he continues fucking you madly, there was another hole in the back, but he always thought why would he use it when your puffy tight cunt is there?
Sweat forming on his whole body as he fucks you like a psychopath, you look at him with your completely wrecked expression and it melts your heart seeing obsessed he looks right now, you'll never stop him, even when his thumbs spread your folds to look at his length getting sucked inside then harshly pulling back out, he hisses at the sight, eyes fixated in there and as he starts rolling his hips sensually you knew he was in the verge of filling you up again, you start tightening your cervix muscles, making him roar "uhhh just like that...fuck that ..." He smacks your clit making you whimper just when he buries himself to the hilt, throbbing his hot seed yet again deep inside you, he's now with both elbows on each side of your head, giving the last thrusts to feel the best of his orgasm before he finally collapses on top of you, sticky with sweat and his softened member inside you.
after catching his breath, he rolls off of you, pulling out making you both wince at the light stroke of your two overstimulated privates, he looks down watching his cum leaking out of you and falling on the towel beneath you, before he lights a cigarette as you both stare at the ceiling, the smoke coming out of his mouth, giving you that familiar atmosphere after every sex session, and the silence after that sex with so many unspoken things left you two in confusion, he looks over at you before whispering in a hoarse voice "c'mere" pulling you with one arm around your bare waist easily, you automatically rest your head on his chest, you hand on his abs as he continues smoking his cigarette for minutes.
After it's all burnt, he sits up resting your head on the pillow, crashing his cigarette off in the ashtray on the nightstand, he surprises you by kissing your lower tummy "you were such a good girl for me" he whispered making your tired self smile, brushing your legs against one another despite the discomfort in between them, you stay there drowning in your thoughts again when he heads to the bathroom, wetting a towel with warm water before walking back to you, parting your legs with caring hands and cleaning up the mess, without forgetting to take the towel that's soaked in your fluids from beneath you, heading back to the bathroom yet again, you hear him washing things and moving around, when he steps back into the room, he heads towards the wardrobe slipping in one of his boxers and grabbing one light, silk nightie for you, he helps you into it and kisses your neck softly "are you tired baby?" He asked as you nodded, he gets under the blanket seeking warmth when your bodies come down from the high and processes the chill weather, pulling you with him, letting you rest your head on his chest again as he caressed your scalp and shoulders.
meanwhile, you were fighting sleep there, the only thing stopping you was your doubts, and you finally look up at him,after all this vulnerability and connection, you can't keep being so bitchy about it, "jungwon" catching his attention "hm?" He looks down at you, before you blurt out:
"do you look at me sometimes and wish I was more.... sophisticated? More...into serious, important society? Like.. employed and all?" You look away feeling ashamed of your way of thinking and the fact that his hurtful words from that heated argument actually did have an impact on you.
he shakes his head.
"babe, I know I said some hurtful things and used your insecurities against you, I feel like a bastard for doing so I swear..." He looks into your eyes, leaning dangerously close that your noses are touching before he whispers again "you're as serious and as important as any other human being on this earth ..and even more for me" he kisses your lips gently, leaving a faint taste of cinnamon and cigarettes before whispering again with one hand buried in your hair locks and the other pulling the nightie's strap off your shoulder to caress it:
"you keep that house a home for me, you make me laugh and ease my burdens..you even blow your back cleaning and cooking...and if it wasn't you making me feel alive...god..I don't know how I could've survived every obstacle that has ever came my way baby"
You nuzzle his nose sensually, your vulnerability taking over you as your whispers shake
"I'm sorry for doubling your stress Hun.."
He captures your lips in a deep kiss, sucking your lips into his every time the kiss was about to break, but it eventually does as you both pant, he lets out a breathy chuckle.
"god, many women at work say they wish they were housewives and creating families, I'll never understand women" he laughs, making you smack his chest gently "shut up won you know nothing" you whine tiredly, he smiles tenderly looking at you.
"oh babe I know everything, I know what's going on inside that little head of yours, I know what you love, I know the exact same house you dream of spending a few weeks with me in" he winks as realization hits you like a truck, it was it, the place you always wrote about in your notes, the simple old fashioned house with simple decorations and a fireplace, the cozy bedroom and the painting of the girl by the river that was exactly facing the bed.
you gasp softly and look up at him "no you didn't..." You whisper in disbelief, feeling guilty for all the times you hated how he's always busy, before he cuts you off "yes I did, those nights out, those busy days were all for working on this..." He knocks on your head gently "little dream haven of yours, woman" you immediately hug him tightly,
"I love you I love you I love you" he hugs back "pull away you smell like sex.." he teases along while burying his face on your neck and hugging you tightly against him "ugh go away, go away you little beautiful woman.." he laughs and you do as well.
"sometimes I can't believe you're a grown man, doing things such as putting snacks somewhere and disappearing like santa.." you laugh at him.
"oh shut up, we both know we both have high ego, just imagine after that argument i give you a packet of candies and be like here's your favourite , woman, you'd put it up my ass" he looks at you, his smile softening "but I managed to make you sleep deeply with the last bottle of chocolate milk, you were drinking like a child being all grumpy about me packing 'my bags' , not knowing I was actually planning to kidnap you" he makes you both giggle, continuing the lazy banter in the sheets.
joking for minutes before sleep steals both your minds, the comfort in each other's arms even making you oversleep the next day, cuz your mind and his, had finally found the answer to everything, and you finally feel worthy again.
@twiishaa @slut4hee @stvrrylove @nodoubtily @nanahachi3 @enhard @onlygarden @kikidoul
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gender-euphowrya · 2 years ago
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huge dev update my grandma is gonna see a psychologist
#pogchamp#finally i don't have to play that role i'm not trained or mentally stable enough to handle anymore#she should have gotten therapy DECADES AGO sis lost both her children through tragic circumstances and had a miserable childhood#she didn't because her generation just worked like that ig and i'm not blaming her for not going but i am GLAD she will now#hopefully it works out she So needs it she's got so much on her mind and super bad anxiety#honestly i'm proud of her for even considering it because she used to dismiss the thought with 'eh at my age it's too late'#plus if she sees my psych i can make the trip with her no problem#And i already know him really well so if she's got any questions about what he's like i can answer those ez#honestly he's the first and only psychologist i've been to but he's Brilliant#super respectful super invested in his patients' well being will never pry too far will never make you feel wrong or blamed#absolutely Nailed handling my coming out has a lot of experience with all kinds of people nice and calming and friendly as hell#i hope it's not an issue that i'm seeing him too like idk if they have some sort of thing where#seeing members of a same family could interfere or something#i don't think so that doesn't seem quite right but who knows ???#anyway So glad for her i really hope she can feel better with this#even if it's just talking to someone about all her thoughts and her fears it's already such a big step to start feeling better#because like. she talks to me but she doesn't say Everything y'know. especially stuff about my transition#she's scared she'd hurt or upset me so she keeps a lot to herself and she just ruminates on it all day long#her brain doesn't have a single second of rest and she worries about Everything#example. she was anxious because her apartment has a bathtub but no shower so she's only been able to wash from the sink#they're going to install a shower soon and she was happy because Finally she's gonna be able to wash herself fine#but now she's anxious about the construction and how she's gonna arrange her furniture and her water consumption#a problem solved = a new problem with her#i honestly suspect she might be autistic because she's also like. very. routine-ish#like This Item Has To Be Here. i have to go to This Place on That Day at That Time#she doesn't like sitting still she doesn't really pick up on jokes and sarcasm there's just...#a LOT of unresolved things with her. she really needs help and i can't wait for her to get it
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olivianyx · 1 year ago
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OMGG I JUST GOT RESULTS WITHOUT BEATING MYSELF UP WITH ROUTINES 😭 + RANT ✨
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HEYY LUVS! I JUST WANNA SHARE MY RESULTS I MANIFESTED WITHIN 2-3 DAYS! THIS YEAR'S GONNA BE MY BEST YEAR Y'ALL ✋AND GUESS WHAT I DID? NOTHING. LITERALLY NOTHING. NUH-UH. PERIODT.
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⚠ LONG POST AHEAD, SWEARING ⚠
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WHAT I MANIFESTED:
🪄 PASSING MY FRESHMAN YEAR WITH HIGH SCORES
🪄 MY FAMILY BOUGHT A NEW APARTMENT WHICH WERE PREPARING TO MOVE IN 3 WEEKS
🪄 ME GETTING INTO THE VOID STATE 😭 AND MANIFESTED CLEAR SKIN! (DAYUM GETTING INTO THE VOID IS DEFO VERY EASY OMGG)
🪄 GETTING LESS ANXIOUS LATELY!
🪄 MY GASTRITIS AND ULCERITIS GETTING CURED
🪄 GETTING MORE COMPLIMENTS IN MY UNI!
🪄 GETTING TALLER! I WENT FROM 5'3" TO 5'7" IN 2 DAYS 😭😭
🪄 GETTING DREAMS OF ME SHIFTING TO MY WR 🥺 (ACTUALLY RESPAWNING LOL, AS THIS THING IS REALLY CONTROVERSIAL IN HERE, PLEASE DON'T GET ME CANCELLED- I'M DOING DEATHLESS RESPAWNING ✋)
🪄 MY MIND IS SURPRISINGLY CALM 😌 THERE'S STILL INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS THO (THOSE ARE ANNOYING ASS BITCHES) BUT I JUST IGNORE EM LIKE I IGNORE PEOPLE AT SCHOOL 🗿
🪄 GOT MANY CONFESSIONS TOO 😭 AND I REJECTED EM ALL, CUS I JUST WANT TO BE SINGLE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE ✋🗿 JK
🪄 GETTING COOL CLOTHES THAT MY MOM DENIED A LOTTA TIMES! (ACTUALLY I'VE ORDERED EM BUT STILL HAVEN'T SHIPPED TO MY ADDRESS YET LOL)
🪄 MY CRUSH BECOMING CLOSE TO ME HEHE 🤭 LIKE SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ME MUCH, BUT LATELY SHE'S BEEN TOO CLOSE TO ME AND ALWAYS WANNA BE WITH ME LOL, 3 DAYS BACK SHE AND I WALKED HOME TOGETHER, WHILE WE GRABBED SOME SNACKS, SPOKE ABT EACH OTHER AND ALL (I FELT LIKE BEING IN A SHOUJO MANGA 😩)
🪄 A NEW PHONE! THAT SAMSUNG GALAXY S22 😩
I MANIFESTED EVERYTHING WITHIN 3 DAYS 😭 I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE MY EYES, JUST. 3. FUCKING. DAYS. GODDAMMIT.
HOW I DID IT:
JUST FULFILLED IT IN MY IMAGINATION
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YEP, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT. I LIVED IN THE 4D REALITY, I NEVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT THE 3D AT ALL. OK LEMME BREAK IT DOWN FOR Y'ALL SO JUST PAY ATTENTION FROM HERE ONWARDS.
🪄 SUPPOSE SOMETHING UNDESIRABLE OR UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE HAPPENING IN YOUR 3D. WHO'S THE CAUSE FOR THAT? YOU. 'BUT I DIDN'T IMAGINE OR THINK OF THESE 😭' BABY, YOU'RE THE SOLE CAUSE, EFFECT, AND THE SOLUTION. THERE'S NO OTHER EXPLANATION TO THIS.
🪄 AS WE ALL KNOW, 3D IS A MIRROR. RIGHT? WHATEVER YOU THINK ABOUT, YOUR ASSUMPTIONS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR FEELINGS, YOUR PERSPECTIVE EVERYTHING WILL BE REFLECTED. SO WHY NOT THINK THE WAY YOU WANT SO YOU CAN EXPERIENCE THE SAME? GET IT.
🪄 IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE THE 3D, CHANGE YOUR 4D FIRST. CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE TO HOW YOUR DESIRED SELF WOULD SEE THE WORLD. KEEP DWELLING IN IT. IF THE 3D SHOWS UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES, DON'T FUCKING GET TRIGGERED. GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION AND DENY YOUR SENSES.
🪄 EVERYTIME YOU SEE SOMETHING ELSE IN THE 3D, GO 'BRUHH THIS IS MY OLD STORY, I ALREADY HAVE WHAT I WANT, THIS IS JUST FAKE' AND MOVE ON. DISTRACT YOURSELF. CUS THE 3D WORLD WHICH YOU SEE IS AN ILLUSION, IT'S NOT REAL. IT'S YOUR CREATION, WHY WOULD YOU TRY TO CONTROL WHAT YOU CREATED? IT'S ALREADY IN CONTROL. YOU ONLY GOTTA REALISE YOUR GODSELF. YOU ARE THE CREATOR, NOT THE CREATION. STOP FUCKING VICTIMIZING YOURSELF.
🪄 I GET IT THAT MOST OF THE PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED BETWEEN LAW OF ASSUMPTION AND NON DUALISM. EVEN I WAS, BUT SLOWLY I REALISED THAT WE'RE ALL NOTHING. WE'RE JUST LIVING IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. VICTIMIZING OURSELVES IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. IRONIC RIGHT?
🪄 THOSE THOUGHTS, ANXIETY, FEELINGS, EMOTIONS ARE ALL IN YOUR PHYSICAL REALM. YOUR MIND, YOUR BODY, YOUR EGO EVERYTHING IS NO REAL, WE ASSUME IT TO BE. WE'RE ARE SHAPELESS, FORMLESS, WE'RE NOTHING! AND EVERYTHING AT THE SAME TIME. CUS EVERYTHING COMES DOWN TO ONE THING, I AM.
🪄 K Y'ALL MIGHT BE SUPER CONFUSED, WHAT I'M TRYNA INFUSE IN YOUR BRAINS. SO WHAT YOU DO IS, LIVE IN YOUR 4D.HOW? IMAGINATION. NO MATTER WHAT YOU SEE IN YOUR 3D, GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION, AFFIRM OR VISUALISE. ANYTHING IS FINE BTW. JUST STAY IN THE STATE OF WISH FULFILLED.
🪄 STOP RELYING ON METHODS, FUCK THEM. JUST BE. DON'T TRY TO CHANGE SOMETHING WHEN YOU ALREADY HAVE THEM. JUST STOP, SURRENDER, STOP FIGHTING, STOP TRYING SO HARD WHEN YOUR ALREADY IT. SO GO LIVE IN YOUR IMAGINATION, FULLY SURRENDER. DO THINGS WHICH YOU LIKE. GO LIVE YOUR LIFE. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK.
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LIKE AREN'T YOU TIRED? TRAPPED IN YOUR OWN CREATIONS? YOU CREATED THEM, YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE WHATEVER. TELL ME HOW LONG ARE YOU GONNA LIVE THIS BULLSHIT LIFE? YOU'RE REALLY GETTING COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE. SO LISTEN UP, DO WHAT YOU LOVE, AFFIRM, VISUALISE, OR DAYDREAM, ZONE OUT, WHATEVER. ALL I DID WAS DO THIS MEDITATION IN THE MORNING, WENT ABOUT MY DAY WATCHING JUJUTSU KAISEN LMAO. THEN RANDOMLY AFFIRM, LIVED IN MY 4D, NEVER PAYED ANY FUCKING ATTENTION TO MY 3D, CUS I'M GOD. I REALLY LOVE VISUALISING, SO I PUT ON A SONG AND START DAYDREAMING IN MY ROOM SMILING LIKE AN IDIOT. ALSO, I DID SATS BEFORE GOING TO BED. THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL I DID FOR 3 FUCKING DAYS, AND GOT WHAT EVER I WANT. ALSO I MADE A CUSTOM TAPE TOO (IT'S A GENERAL SELF CONCEPT ONE) I LISTENED TO IT FOR 30 MINS AND JUST WENT ABOUT MY DAY THINKING I HAD WHATEVER I FUCKING DESIRE, CUS IT'S ALL MY CREATIONS AND I HAVE IT ALREADY. THERE'S NOTHING TO GET, IT'S ALREADY IN ME.
LUV YOU, BYE 💋
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ninguitar · 4 months ago
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୨୧ ONLY YOU, MY GIRL ˒˒ NY
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─── ﹙🎶﹚with arguments already spurred on between the two of you, the light to the fuse was the way some sleazy, no-good guy hits on you. of course, ningning couldn't help but lash onto you, inevitably leading to kissing in the rain.
pairing. ning yizhuo x f!r genre. fluff + some angst wc. 1.1k+ notes. didn't intend to make this so long. oops. MASTERLIST.
now playing ⋆ dark red by steve lacy
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NING YIZHUO REMEMBERS THE DAY she asked you out with a kind of affection that just, makes her heart pump out of her chest—the way your mumbled words and giggling made her feel like the luckiest girl in the world. it was one of those perfect afternoons, flowers scattered around the field, as the chinese girl dragged you to the mat, her hands pressed against your eyes while she meekly giggles. the sun hanging over the two of you had only made everything comforting and slow, practically engulfing ningning. all her attention was on you, her eyes flickering to your lips.
and your relationship was perfect, really, lingering with fervor and passion; until it wasn't.
for weeks now, the relentless absence of the chinese girl only made you sulk, revisiting your troubled mind ever-so-often. sure, her voice blares through your head every night, every day, mainly through the phone calls, but you couldn't help but feel a mixture of fear and anxiety. sighing, you check the time on your phone again, the movement becoming instinctual.
9:30 p.m., great, she was incredibly late to your guys' weekly movie-night. your laptop's harsh brightness only makes you huff and your eyes burnt-out, as you card a hand through your hair.
were you being too clingy and anxious? maybe, who knows, but nonetheless, all you wanted to do was be embraced in the chinese girl's arms, her melodic voice against your ear reassuring you. every single crack and sound made your body still, despite knowing it wasn't your ningning.
"i'll be there at 6, baby, i promise. love you."
her words ring in your ears, as your mind forced you to revisit that lie. but hey, maybe she was just busy and got too caught up. why couldn't you just give ningning the benefit of the doubt?
your heart jumps in fear, as you hear the door unlock, making you whip your head towards the door. ningning steps into the house, a meek smile playing on her face, eye-bags adorning her face, that still made her drop-dead gorgeous. the light illuminating her face only brought out her features more, making your heart skip.
"fuck, 'm sorry, work had be held back and—" before ningning could continue, your lips crash against her velvety lips. god, you could just sink yourself against ningning all day without a care in the world, and you'd be perfectly content with that. breathless, you mumble, "it's fine, don't worry ’bout it."
"c'mon, 's not fine; this is, like, the fourth time i've been late," ningning mutters, her lips against your ears, as you shake your head.
"it's whatever, ning, i promise. it's not like you haven't been late for the past few days anyway," you shrug, mumbling as though your words were merely casual. to ningning, it had practically stung like a bee, as the chinese girl allows for a sigh to drift from her lips, already with no attempts to conceal her distaste.
her eyebrows furrow, almost incredulously, "why are you acting like you haven't been just dismissing them and insisting it's fine if you're just gonna nitpick me on it?" she mutters sharply, displeasure flowing through the girl.
"why are you getting so irritated? all i did was just mention that you have been late for the week, so it's not that different from tonight, ning," you sigh, trying to be rational with the obviously exhausted girl. your hand moves to curl around her wrist, "just- just sleep, okay? you need it."
your attempts to soothe her irritation only drives her to become aggravated, as she runs a hand through her hair, meekly huffing. your hopes for the girl to just listen to your words and rest begin to shatter helplessly.
"fine, whatever,” ningning scoffs, annoyance burning through her skin, as she presses a chaste kiss against your forehead, not wanting her irritation to seep through to the point she wouldn't at least kiss you good night.
"g'night," you mumble against ningning's cheek, to which the chinese girl only nods, her ring-clad hand rubbing your shoulder, a stark contrast to her tense behavior.
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ning yizhuo was a busy girl—an extremely busy one, at that. she was a driven girl; she knew her goals, her wants, and she was adamant on achieving them.
and being driven meant attending conferences and rather unpleasant parties with the lingering smell of alcohol and cannabis, alongside whatever else was circulating inside the house, just to make connections.
"maybe we should leave, ning."
you reiterated once again, tugging the chinese girl by her arm mindlessly, sighs drifting from your lips. ningning stumbles against you, her hands meeting your chest to stabilize herself with a Yelp escaping her throat.
your hands snake around ningning's waist to keep her upright, "you're practically smelling like booze, ning. why don't we just call it a day?"
"no!" ningning huffs, her face buried against the crook of your neck, before a grin plays on her face, "i'm fine, i swear, baby."
with ningning's speech slurring, you couldn't help but feel wary of her drunken state. knowing how stubborn the girl was, you meekly nodded, pressing a kiss against her cheek, "'kay, just be careful, okay? call me if you need anythin'."
you followed the path towards the pool at the backyard of the penthouse, sitting down on the edge of it, with your knees hugging your chest. your eyes follow the heaps of people in the pool, the raucous noise of chatter growing louder.
"you alone?"
you turn to the guy beside you, an ear-to-ear smirk playing on his face, as he was wrapped in a towel with wet hair dripping to his lower back and onto the fabric. before you could reply, the boy situates himself next to you, his legs hanging off the edge of the pool.
nonetheless you nod, your head turnt back to the illuminating water. "not a talker, i suppose?" his head quirks up, meeting yours, his eyebrows furrowing, hoping that you'd at least have the courtesy to answer.
"not with a guy who is seemingly naked under a towel," you shrug, a chuckle escaping your breath. the guy lets out a giggle at the joke you spurred, making you stiffen.
"it's like 45 degrees here for god's sake," you huff, pondering on how the guy had seemed just so unfazed by the chilly weather, as if it was just regular ol' summer heat.
"i promise you that it's not that cold," he shrugs, and it was only now that you realized that ningning would give you an earful for even talking to the guy, but nonetheless, you shook the thought away, knowing that ningning was probably already corned by flirtatious men and women.
"sooo… you here alone, or with a friend or anything?" the guy drawls, his hands inching closer to yours, making you shudder.
"yeah, girlfriend," you mutter out, making the guy chuckle, "can't you give me an exception? after all, you're at a party."
before you could answer, you felt a slender hand slide over your neck and down to the exposed skin of your collarbones, making you squeal in surprise.
"shit, ning," you grunt, your hand curling around ningning's wrist, as you take a deep breath.
"who's this?" ningning takes a sharp tone, almost offended that you spent your time with another guy. her jaw clenches, and her nails practically dig into your collarbone—though, not enough to make you bleed, of course.
"i don't know, actually" you mumble, unsure, as your eyes flicker between them, watching them stare at each other. you rub the back of your neck awkwardly before the guy speaks up, "holy shit—you didn't tell me you were dating ning—"
ningning cuts him off, "and what about it?"
your eyes snap up to ningning with her glare directed at the other guy, as you suddenly stand up, dragging ningning to the street. before you could say anything, the chinese girl huffs, letting out a heavy breath.
"god, are you too stupid to see what was happening!" ningning looks at you like she was begging for you to understand what she was saying.
"i know, ning, but calm down—i shut him down anyway!" your brows furrow, as displeasure flows through you.
despite the rain droplets adorning your guys' skin, all ningning could focus on was the fact a guy was flirting with you—a good-for-nothing guy, who couldn't even take a hint.
"still- he was practically eye-fucking you—can't you see?" ningning's face darkens, her body growing more tense, as she steps closer to you.
you sigh, rubbing your temples, "ning—c'mon, i told him i had a girlfriend before you came," you desperately tried to reason with her.
ningning only crosses her arms against her chest, her voice slightly raising, "i don't care; he was still all up on you! sorry that i like my girlfriend to only myself!"
your expression crumbles, as you step towards the chinese girl, your hands cupping her jaw. "i know, c'mon, let's just… not argue, okay? i'm sorry, ning," you apologize, before pulling her down to your lips.
even with your drenched clothes against ningning's clothes, you couldn't help but press kisses against her lips with fervor. your hands were entangled in the girl's tresses, noses bumping occasionally. savoring the chaste kisses against ningning's velvety lips, your ears burn.
"you're forgiven, pretty girl," ningning drawls, her breath hitting your lips. the way the name just rolled off of her tongue smoothly had your knees bucking. you giggle at her drenched hair, your hands tucking the wet locks behind her ears.
maybe the heated arguments between the two of you was what kept you guys entangled within each other. after all, easy was boring.
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i think of her so much, it drives me crazy
i just don't want her to leave me
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daisymbin · 2 months ago
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Hi there! I've seen some really good request combos but I can't recall seeing an angst x second chance one so i wanted to request it hehe :) The prompts i loved together are angst 43 and second chance 40 :3 with Mingyu, and with a happy/hopeful ending please!
thank you for requesting this!!! <3
full prompt list!
check out my masterlist! // gyu's m.list
angst prompt #43: ''how could you think i didn't care?'' +
second chance prompt #40: ''i never wanted anyone else—it was always you.''
you hadn’t meant to ice him out. not really. but it felt like mingyu’s warmth, his charm, his effortless way of making everyone feel special, had started to stretch thin when it came to you. the two of you weren’t even dating; just caught in that awkward, exhilarating, terrifying talking stage where every word and action felt magnified. and lately, it felt like mingyu was pulling away.
the texts had slowed. the late-night calls dwindled. and at the last group hangout, he’d barely sat near you, too busy making everyone laugh from the other end of the table. maybe it was nothing. or maybe it was everything. either way, you’d convinced yourself that whatever spark had been there before, it was gone now.
so you pulled back, giving him the space he seemed to need. if he wanted to talk, he could. if he didn’t—well, you were already bracing yourself for that.
what you hadn’t braced yourself for was mingyu showing up at your apartment unannounced, looking like he hadn’t slept in days. he stood in your doorway, his broad frame taking up the entire space, his usual confidence replaced by an anxious energy that made your stomach twist.
“are you avoiding me?” he asked, his voice quieter than usual, like he was almost afraid of the answer.
you blinked, caught off guard. “what are you doing here?”
“answer me,” he insisted, stepping closer, his brows furrowed. “why have you been ignoring me?”
you opened your mouth, then shut it again, unsure what to say. his sudden appearance had completely thrown you off. “i haven’t been ignoring you,” you said finally, your arms crossing defensively. “i’ve just... been busy.”
“busy?” he repeated, his tone disbelieving. “you didn’t even look at me at the restaurant last weekend. your replies have been one-word answers for days. what’s going on? did i do something wrong?”
his words sent a pang through you, but you couldn’t tell if it was guilt or frustration. “it’s not that you did something wrong, mingyu,” you said, your voice quieter now. “it’s just... it doesn’t matter. forget it.”
“don’t do that,” he said, stepping further into your space, his voice suddenly firmer. “don’t tell me to forget it. just tell me what’s going on.”
you hesitated, the words sticking in your throat. how were you supposed to tell him? that you’d started to believe you’d imagined everything between you—the long talks, the lingering glances, the way his hand would hover near yours like he wanted to reach out but wasn’t sure if he could.
it wasn’t like you were in a relationship. you weren’t even sure if he wanted to be in one. and lately, it had started to feel like he didn’t.
“i just thought maybe... maybe you were losing interest,” you finally admitted, your voice barely audible.
mingyu froze, like your words had physically stopped him in his tracks. “losing interest?” he repeated, his voice tinged with disbelief. “you think i’ve lost interest in you?”
you avoided his gaze, your arms tightening around yourself. “you don’t really talk to me the way you used to, mingyu. you’re always busy with other people. and i get it, okay? we’re not... anything. not really. you don’t owe me anything.”
his expression crumbled, the confusion on his face giving way to something raw and vulnerable. when he spoke again, his voice was unsteady, like he was struggling to keep his emotions in check. “how could you think i didn’t care?”
“because you don’t show it,” you said, the frustration spilling out before you could stop it. “you don’t text as much. you don’t call. and at the restaurant, you barely looked at me. how was i supposed to know that you still...” you trailed off, shaking your head. “never mind.”
“no, not never mind,” he said firmly, his voice rising slightly. “don’t do that. don’t act like what you’re feeling doesn’t matter. it does.”
you looked at him then, really looked at him, and saw the worry etched into his face, the way his shoulders were tense like he was carrying the weight of something he couldn’t name.
“i thought you didn’t want this anymore,” you said quietly, your voice breaking. “i thought you realized you didn’t need me.”
mingyu inhaled sharply, like your words had knocked the wind out of him. “realized i didn’t need you?” he repeated, shaking his head. “how could you even think that?”
“because it’s not like we’re together,” you said, your frustration bubbling to the surface again. “we’re just... whatever this is. and it felt like you were pulling away. so yeah, i thought maybe you didn’t care anymore.”
he stared at you for a long moment, his expression softening, and then he took a step closer, closing the distance between you. “i never wanted anyone else,” he said, his voice steady and sure. “it was always you. i thought you knew that.”
your heart caught in your throat at his words, the vulnerability in his tone leaving you speechless. “mingyu...”
“i didn’t realize i made you feel like this,” he said, guilt flashing in his eyes. “but i don’t want to confuse you anymore.”
you stared at him, holding your breath as he hesitated, then finally spoke again. “let me take you out. for real this time. not just a group hangout or a quick coffee. an actual date, just the two of us.”
your eyes widened at his words, your pulse racing. “a date?”
“yeah,” he said, a small, hopeful smile breaking through his nerves. “we’ve been stuck in this... ‘talking’ thing for too long, and it’s my fault for not being clearer. so let me fix it. let me show you how serious i am.”
you blinked back the tears threatening to well up, your lips tugging into a soft smile. “okay,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “yes.”
his entire face lit up at your response, his smile widening into that familiar, dazzling grin. but then his expression softened again, and he took another step closer, his voice dropping to something quieter, more intimate.
“tomorrow,” he said, gently brushing his fingers against yours. “i’ll plan something perfect for us tomorrow. but for now...” his voice wavered, the vulnerability returning. “can we cuddle? i missed you.”
“cuddle?” you echoed, tilting your head in confusion.
he nodded, a sheepish laugh slipping out. “yeah. i’ve been going crazy thinking you didn’t want to talk to me anymore. i just... need to hold you for a bit. please?”
your heart melted at the rawness in his tone, and you stepped back to let him in, his arms wrapping around you the moment the door clicked shut. his hold was firm but gentle, like he was afraid you might slip away if he let go even a little.
“tomorrow,” he whispered into your hair. “i’ll take you on the best date you’ve ever had. but tonight, can we just... stay like this?”
you nodded against his chest, your earlier doubts melting away as his warmth surrounded you. “tonight’s yours, mingyu,” you murmured.
and as his hold tightened just slightly, you knew you were his, too.
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pomefioredove · 1 month ago
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Hiii!!! May I order a Sugar cookie, #19 with candy cane & chocolate drizzle please? Thanks!
Happy Holidays!🎄
hi all,, sorry I haven't been writing much lately, I've been kept busy at home + working on person projects (˶˃⤙˂˶) hope this makes up for it
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order #19, sugar with candy cane and chocolate drizzle
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ a matching set
tropes: exes to friends to lovers characters: riddle additional info: romantic, gender neutral reader, reader is not specified to be yuu, not proofread, riddle is going to kill all of them except for reader after this dw
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It wasn't really, actually, truly his fault.
You knew that, even though Riddle hadn't given you a definitive reason for breaking up; he hadn't really given you a reason at all. He was uncharacteristically anxious.
...Checking the time, avoiding your eyes, fidgeting with the sleeve of his dorm uniform, babbling something about his schedule and his studies and how irresponsible and careless it was for him to date...
He didn't say it was his mother, but you knew.
Since then, you had been trying and failing to get him to talk about it.
Or talk to you at all.
It had been two months already, and you hadn't seen him even once. He'd blocked your number, unofficially banned you from Heartslabyul, and kept hiding behind Trey or Ace or whoever was taller (which, for him, is most people) when you walked by.
You had almost lost hope.
"Hurry up!" Ace shouts, "What part of emergency don't you get?!"
"I'm coming!" you wheeze. You'd been dragged all the way across campus to Heartslabyul by the plucky first year.
"Wh-what's wrong, again?"
Ace scoffs. "It's just an emergency, okay? And if we don't fix it, we're gonna be in ankle-deep sh-"
"There you are!"
Without a word of warning, Deuce grabs your other wrist and drags you inside the dorm with Ace.
"We've been waiting!"
Waiting? you think, and then there's a hand on your shoulder.
"Good, you found them," Trey says to the first years. "Cater's waiting in the kitchen."
The kitchen? "What's going-"
"Hey, hun!" there's that familiar smile and a hand on your lower back.
You're surrounded now, hands all over you, almost as if you're being restrained or something-
"Quickly, he is not happy!" Cater chimes, dragging you into the kitchen with the other three.
You look between them. "He. He? Oh, no-"
And, suddenly, you're alone again. The pantry door slams shut behind you, and something clicks.
You try the doorknob. It's locked. "Guys?"
"This is for everyone's good!" Ace shouts. You can't see his face, but you know the exact look on it.
"He's been a royal pain ever since you broke up!"
He. You turn from the door, and there, simmering in the corner with his arms crossed and brow knotted, is your ex-boyfriend.
"Hello," Riddle says. "This was not my idea."
You blink. "...Yeah, thought so. What's going on?"
"We're not letting either of you out until you work through your drama," Cater says from behind the door.
You grimace.
"My thoughts exactly," Riddle murmurs. "Don't ask me to take down the door. Damaging school property is abhorrent, and this would violate rule number 234-"
"-In argument with a wife, or spouse, one must take to the law, stand on his head, or somersault to a door," Trey finishes. "We took some liberties with that one. Ace's idea."
"I've taught them too well," Riddle sighs.
You sit beside him in the corner.
"Well, I don't know about you, but I'm no good at somersaults,"
Riddle is quiet. In the dark of the pantry, you could swear something like guilt passes over his face, but then he's looking ahead, towards the door.
The chatter of the four on the other side become whispers, and then nothing at all. The door remains locked and blocked by something heavy, but the people are gone.
You sigh. "Should we-"
"There's nothing to talk about,"
You stare. You wait.
"Is it about your-"
"I said," he interrupts, holding a finger to shush you. "Nothing"
And so, you wait.
And wait.
And wait...
He checks the time every so often. Thirty minutes, an hour, two hours, three.
No one comes. The silence is deafening, the dark is suffocating. This is the least fun you've had, ever.
Finally, you stand.
Riddle scoffs. "Don't tell me you intend to break down the door,"
"No," you say. "I'm sorting."
And you do. You begin to dust and sort the pantry in the way he taught you to, some time ago.
Riddle raises an eyebrow, and stands, to watch. He cradles his chin in his palm.
He says nothing.
After a few minutes, he begins doing the same, sorting the jars of tea leaves and baskets of fruit, checking for spoiled food, mumbling to himself.
"I count eight hundred and twelve sugar cubes, which is thirty-eight less than there should be at minimum capacity,"
"There's a surplus of flour,"
"Too much flour," he nods. "I'll have Trey do bake over the weekend, so it goes to good use."
"Ask him for something with cherries, there are lots of jars,"
"Good thinking,"
You smile, a little. "White tea would pair nicely with a cherry tart,"
He smiles back. "Yes, it would,"
The silence feels a little softer.
By the time the door opens, dusting you with moonlight from the forgotten outside, the entire pantry has been sorted to perfection.
"Seriously? Five hours in here and you clean?" Ace says.
Riddle scoffs as he leaves the dark confines of the pantry. "There was hardly anything else to do,"
He offers his hand to you, and you take it, letting him pull you into the moonlight.
"Did you at least talk things through?"
You and Riddle share a look.
"...Somewhat," he admits. "We... mostly spoke of the next unbirthday party."
Cater snaps a picture of the aesthetically pleasing pantry, and Ace rolls his eyes.
"You two are really a matching set, huh?"
Riddle looks at you, a small, almost mischievous smile on his lips.
It's a strange look on him, but a good one. You smile back.
"I suppose we are,"
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pullupinarari · 2 months ago
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heyyy i really love your blurbs, it's always fun and heartwarming to read 💗
can i give you some idea?
lewis and yn were in their early stages of relationship, and one day lewis slept over in yn's place and he found out yn had a lot of bruises like in her elbow, arms, legs even in her thighs. lewis was so concerned with that. he hesitated to ask her, then turned out it's just yn was so careless and clumsy that she randomly bumped herself into a lot of things. since then lewis always kept his eyes whenever yn with him, just to protect her so she didn't bump herself into anything.
thank you for always being open for any ideas, love you 💗💗
a/n: thank you so much for your lovely words, my love!! i love you too 🩷 thank you for sharing this idea with me, i related to it so much, even if i think this definitely isn't the best i've ever written, i'm just feeling a little blocked lately. hope you can still enjoy it 🩷
Facing the early stages of a relationship can be tricky: you are still getting to know each other, acknowledging the other’s brightest ideas while discovering who they are on their darkest days - while also allowing yourself to be vulnerable around your newfound half. 
Lewis is an easy-going, lighthearted guy. It’s easy to steal a laugh from him, and rare are the days when you won’t see him with a smile on his face. Even while struggling with his own problems, he is a caring boyfriend, the one who pays full attention to his girlfriend when you are speaking, learning every little detail about your favorite things so he can surprise you. 
It’s been four months since you two started dating - the four lightest moments that you have memory of in your entire life. Lewis makes you feel heard, seen, loved. 
Being his attentive self, your boyfriend soon began to notice that it was a recurrent event for you to bump into lots of different things: tables, doors, even going against the wall while walking. 
Lewis would often make jokes about your clumsiness. 
- Looks like you’re a pro at finding corners to bump into. - a small chuckle would leave his lips, while trying to help you recompose your frame after you lost your balance and nudge the table again. 
It was a regular scene to find you lean onto the wall while distractedly walking, in the exact same way you would bump into Lewis while walking side by side with him.
He usually would make funny remarks about it, playing it off like it wasn’t anything major - just as you would do. But, on this particular weekend, his mind couldn’t even think about cracking a joke when he looked at your legs. 
Lewis had just come back from a triple header, missing you like crazy - feeling anxious to finally be able to hold you close all night, driving straight to your place with his pyjamas, a change of clothes in a bag and the eagerness to peacefully sleep next to you again. 
His eyes follow your figure as you walk inside the room with your night clothes on already. Wearing shorts, your legs are in full display for him to capture every detail of your shape. But instead, his gaze is fixed on the several bruises that adorn your skin, leaving your boyfriend confused. 
With furrowed eyebrows, he follows your body, until you finally reach the mattress to lay beside your favorite form of all - his. You wrap your arms around his torso, lying your head in his chest as you study his features. 
- What’s wrong? - your sweet voice asks him, worried growing inside of you the more you look at his confused expression. 
As much as the words almost threaten to spill from his lips on their own, Lewis doesn’t know if he should ask. Maybe you might find it weird or invasive if he asks why your legs are covered in bruises - remember, you haven’t been together for that long. 
But the concern growing in his chest is bigger than that. What if something happened to you while he was away? The intrusive thoughts are quick to invade his mind: what if something happened and he wasn’t here to protect you? And why haven’t you told him anything about it? Maybe you’re embarrassed? Maybe you don’t want him to worry? But that’s nonsense, he’s already worrying sick. 
With some hesitation lacing his voice, Lewis finally speaks. 
- Baby, what happened to your legs? Why are you full of bruises? Did something happen to you? - he bombs you with questions, on the verge of feeling his heart pumping blood into his veins faster as he inspects the surprised look on your face.
You stay silent for a second, looking down at your legs and remembering where each one of the bruises came from. With a smile on your face, you turn your attention to your boyfriend again, who’s looking down at you with his big, characteristic puppy eyes. 
- Oh, my love. You can breathe, okay? Nothing happened, it’s just my clumsy self that bumped into multiple things in a short period of time. You know, some things just never change - you nudge the tip of his nose with yours, smiling at the way he seems to relax at your words. 
Placing a loving kiss on your lips, he shakes his head at you. 
- Do I need to take measures into my own hands? I can’t have you all bruised, babe. - his tone softens, his mouth working to kiss your cheeks, nose, neck, multiple times now. 
Ever since that day, Lewis decided to dedicate an extra percentage of his attention to your clumsy state - actually trying to help you not to get so bruised. When you would get near the corner of a table, your boyfriend would put his hand on it, realizing that you would bump into it already. 
He would gently hold your figure when he noticed that you were losing your balance, while looking at your phone or distracted with something, and he would always make sure to do it discreetly when you two were in public, not wanting you to feel embarrassed.
When you drop something, he makes sure to protect your head with his hand, from all the borders of the furniture around - if you had to hit something, it would be his hand and not a sharp edge.
Keeping a protective eye on you so you don’t hurt yourself quickly became one of his everyday tasks. He wouldn’t mind bruising his own hand on the corners, as long as you would stay far from them, and safe from getting so many bruises on your body. And he can’t deny that, silently, he loves his new job, because he gets the best type of payment for it everytime that he saves you from another bruise - your sweet, thankful kisses.
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christhopersturniolo · 1 year ago
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୨ HOCKEY PROBLEMS ୧
summary: you have been having some problems in your relationship with Chris, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t loves you.
notes: this is my first time writing a fanfic, I've always wanted to create one since 2020. english isn't my first language, it's probably not very detailed and there might be some mistakes, so don't expect too much lol. but give me feedback tho, l'd love to know what you think!
warnings: sexual assault, cussing, fluff, about three thousand words I think.
୨୧
My relationship with my boyfriend Chris is not the best. Well, at least, not now.
Lately we’ve been arguing all day long over stupid things, like who gets the last slice of pizza, or who gets the last word in a discussion. And it always ends in the same way. Silent treatment, from both sides. But it's not like Chris or I enjoy it. Most nights, I hear him in the bathroom, where he spend hours in tears. It’s horrible and makes me feel like a piece of shit. Hearing him cry only adds to my own feelings of guilt.
And how do we make things up? Sex, over and over. He would fuck the attitude out of me if he had to.
Me and Chris made a pinky promise that I would never miss any of his Hockey games. And I never did, cause i know how much my presence is important to him. And especially cause we are always in good terms the days before any of his games, but not today, we just argued again about nothing, we haven't talked for the past two days.
Nick and Matt, Chris's brothers, usually text me and offer to pick me up for Chris's games, but this time, their texts never came. It’s like they knew how our relationship was going. Chris definitely told them something.
Now you see myself driving to the arena where he plays in, the game is about to start in 20 minutes, and with this traffic, I don’t know if I will be there in time.
Red sign for the past 5 minutes. I have cars in front of me, behind me and next to me. Fuck. I start getting anxious. My nerves are on edge. I bit my nails subconsciously, the habit I got from my dad. My leg starts shaking. I can’t mess up things even more, I gotta be there, I have to be there.
After what feels like an eternity stuck in traffic, the car in front of me finally starts moving. I let out a sigh of relief as I find a parking spot. After that, I enter the venue where Chris plays (Which wasn’t that big, cause he plays in a small team in our city.)
Before taking a seat I scan the crowd anxiously, searching for any familiar faces, no one, I can’t find anyone, not even his two brothers. “Fuck it” I mumble to myself and I just get in a seat with some random people next to me.
The game is about to start, the crowd is already cheering. The players are drinking water and getting ready to get in the rink. My eyes examine each one of them, looking for Chris, number three. He was with a serious face. ‘Are he’s eyes red?’ I think to myself as I narrow my eyes, my vision is bad as shit, but I can tell he’s eyes are all puffy. He has some big dark circles underneath his pretty blue eyes, he looks fucking exhausted, It was evident that he was crying just now.
The players finally begin to take to the ice, their skates gliding across the surface as they prepare for the game to begin.
On Chris's team, there are six talented players, used to winning every single game. However, this time, they were against a really good team. Chris hated that team. I hated that team. Well, not really the team, but one of the players: Cam, Cameron.
Cam is a completely fucking jerk, in college he would always try to hit on me, but I’ve never really went with his face, what would get on his nerves, especially when I started dating Chris. It went to the point where he would force me to have intimate things with him. He was the worst human alive, and I would do anything to see him dead.
FLASHBACK
I just had PE, finding myself alone in the girls locker room as I change clothes. The sound of the front door opening echoed, followed by quiet footsteps creeping up behind me, sending shivers down my spine. I try to ignore it.
As I slipped my shirt back on, I felt two hands grip the sides of my hips, and a warm breath brushed against my neck. I freeze for two seconds. I know this is not Chris. Without thinking, I instinctively push the hands away and I turn around quickly, only to come face to face with Cameron.
I glare at him, my heart racing with a mix of fear and anger. His smirk widens as he takes a step closer, invading my personal space. "What's the rush, sweetheart?" He whispers, his voice dripping with arrogance.
I take a step back feeling the wall behind me getting closer "What are you even doing here? Get the fuck away from me, Cameron" I say firmly, trying to sound like i’m not scared, but the reality is that I’m pissing my pants.
He chuckles like he’s making fun of me, his eyes glinting with malice. "Or what? You'll tell your precious boyfriend Chris?" He teases, moving closer until I can feel his breath on my face. grabbing my waist and pinning them against the wall. "Come on, babe, you know you want it as much as I do.." he affirms, leaning in to kiss me, touching his lips on mines.
“Get the fuck away!” I whisper yell as i try to punch him away but he grabs my wrists. I struggle against his hold, but his grip tightens, his fingers digging into my skin, definitely leaving red marks.
I don’t know what to do. I can’t move. I start panicking. This is my end.
Tears blur my vision as I plead "Cameron, stop!" My voice trembles with fear as he kisses me, his lips rough and demanding against mine. Each kiss is a painful reminder of my vulnerability. Each kiss feels like a violation. I feel dirty, tainted by his touch everywhere in my body. A wave of nausea churns in the pit of my stomach as I try to move him away from me.
"Stop fucking fighting, you are not getting away from me" He murmurs against my lips "You deserve this, you want this.” I try to move as he keeps pinning me "You think I don’t see the eyes you give me when I walk by? Huh slut?" He scoffs, his hot breath against my face. "You were begging for this."
“I wasn’t begging for any of this. I never gave him any ‘eyes,’ he’s fucking delusional!” I think to myself, but my words remain trapped in my throat, suffocated.
As his lips travel down to my neck, leaving a trail of unwanted kisses, I can’t do anything more than start crying and screaming, kicking my legs and arms.
I never went back to those lockers again.
END OF THE FLASHBACK
I hated him so fucking much, and Chris did even more. And now, they are about to compete against each other.
The moment Chris stepped onto the rink, I could see his eyes looking for someone known on the crowd. Desperately, I raised my hand and waved, hoping he would spot me. And he did. His face automatically softened into a gentle smile, erasing some of the tension that had been weighing on me, but he was still with his tired eyes.
The game started with an intensity that matched the tension in the air. Both teams were determined to win. Cameron eyes were burning with rage. At this point, they weren’t competing as a team, it wasn’t about the game, it was about their personal life.
As the game progressed, the rivalry between them two escalated. They began to argue on the ice, each vying for control of the puck with increasing aggression.
Chris managing to gain possession of the puck and score two goals in less than five minutes. But Cam, folded by his own anger, refused to back down. Without thinking he charged towards him at full speed. Cameron swung his stick, causing Chris to trip and fall hard onto the ice.
“What the fuck is he doing?” I say out loud as I get up from my seat to get a better view. Chris remained on the ground for what felt like an eternity, clearly in pain. Every player on the ice stopped and looked around confused without knowing what to do, but not Cameron. He keeps going with the puck in direction to make a goal, with a visible smile on his lips. But then he notices how everyone really stopped and he slows down too, annoyed, not showing any regret.
The thing is, my boyfriend is in a fetal position on the ice, unable to move and no one is doing anything about it? That’s not happening, not with Chris. Without a second thought, I get up from my seat, whispering apologies to those I brushed past as I made my way to the rink. Ignoring the stares and comments from the crowd, I stepped onto the ice, my focus solely on reaching Chris. I get in the rink. I don’t give a shit about who’s watching me.
Kneeling beside Chris. His nose was bleeding, he looked pale and disoriented. Gently, I placed a hand on his shoulder, my voice trembling with concern. "Chris" I whisper, my voice shaking "Are you okay? Please look at me..” I beg in a desperate tone
Chris struggled to respond, his voice barely above a whisper as he fought through the pain "Y-Yeah.. I’m fine.." His eyes half-closed in discomfort.
Suddenly, the sound of approaching footsteps drew my attention, and I glanced up to see some of the players from both teams getting around us, their expressions a mix of confusion and concern. Sensing the seriousness of the situation, a few of them hurried off to get help, while others stood by, unsure of what to do.
“Is he okay?” One of Chris's teammates asked as he knelt beside me, his voice filled with worry.
My anxiety spiked at the sight of Chris's condition, and I couldn't help but let my frustration show. "No, he’s not!" I replied, my voice unintentionally louder than intended. "Don’t you guys have nurses or some kind of medical staff here?!"
The teammate glanced back at me, his expression uncertain. "Yeah, I’m pretty sure they're on their way, don’t worry, he will be fine” He said sounding unsure.
I gently place Chris head on my lap, whispering sweet and calming words on his ear while we wait for someone help us. What I was saying was comforting me more than Chris.
Finally the arena's medical staff arrived, urging us to clear the area around Chris. They place him on a stretcher and wheeling him out of the rink. As they took Chris away, I followed closely behind them, my steps quickening to keep pace with their hurried movements. "Hey, excuse me," I called out to one of the workers, my voice tinged with desperation "Is it okay if I stay with him?" But they seemed way too focused on their task, ignoring me completely as they rushed Chris to a small emergency room they had here, leaving me behind on the hallway, my heart pounded with worry and frustration. But before I could even process what was happening, a familiar voice cut through the silence. I turn around,
Cameron.
"Look who it is" He says, his gaze fixated on me with an unsettling intensity. "Never thought I'd see you here, playing the concerned girlfriend” He chuckles.
My blood boiled at his words, the memories of his unwanted advances and aggressive behavior flooding back with nauseating clarity. "You're sick, Cameron." My voice trembling with rage “You can’t even stand losing a fucking game, you are insane.” I stay some seconds in silence before talking again "You better stay the hell away from me and Chris."
Cameron's smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction as he reveled in my discomfort. "Or what?" He teases, taking a step closer "You gonna hit me? Huh?” He talks in a mocking way
I raised my hand and delivered a good slap on his left cheek, the sound echoing through the empty hallway. "I fucking hate you!" I yell, my voice trembling with rage as I glared at him with undisguised contempt.
Before Cameron could react, the sound of approaching footsteps coming in our attention, and I glanced up to see some of Chris's teammates rushing towards us, their expressions a mix of concern and confusion.
"What's going on here?" The same blonde guy with a four in his shirt asks, his voice tinged with urgency as he eyed Cameron with suspicion.
"Nothing," he muttered, attempting to regain his composure, "I was just.. checking on Chris. But the workers said we have to wait, and unfortunately, I've got somewhere else to be." Cameron lies, fuck he’s good at lying.
He gets closer to me, placing his hand on my shoulder, rubbing it gently. “I hope he gets better” He said in a fake nice tone, like he means it, I move his hand away from me, making him get slightly angry again, he leaves. I watch him go, feeling a sense of relief wash over me knowing that he was finally out of here.
Turning back to Chris's teammate, I say “Anyways..” I take a deep breath “I will just wait here until they say something”
The blonde one nods understanding. “Yeah, that sounds like a plan to me” He replies, his voice filled with sympathy “So, the game was canceled, and we got shit to do, so we can’t really wait here”
“Yeah sure, no problem, I understand” I respond, I try to sound so nice as he is sounding “I'll make sure Chris texts you guys after he leaves the room.”
Chris's teammate nodded appreciatively and they all began to leave to the same direction as Cameron. I sit into a chair next to the door where Chris was, my mind racing thinking about Chris.
Some good ten minutes after, one of the workers is leaving the room, I look up at him, catching his attention. “Excuse me,” I begin, my voice laced with anticipation “can I see Chris?”
He nods, offering a small smile. “Of course, go ahead” He replies kindly before disappearing down the hallway.
Before I enter the room, I take a few deep breaths to control my anxiety. Knocking gently on the door, I slowly open it. He was sitting in a long bench with elastic bandage on his ankle and wrist. Chris's eyes light up at the moment he sees me and a warm smile spreads across his face.
“Shit Chris, I just slapped Cameron in the face!” I say as I close the door behind me. Chris immediately starts laughing. his laugh is contagious. I sit down next to him. “You did not” He keeps laughing
“What’s so funny? I’m being serious” I chuckle, feeling the tension ease from my mind as Chris's laughter fills the room.
"I'm sorry, babe" he says between laughs "But when was that?”
“Literally like fifteen minutes ago! Gosh he’s so fucking annoying! And did you see the way he literally made you fall on purpose? I could break his face right now” I say in a dramatic tone, making him laugh even more.
“Anyways he doesn’t matter..” I look around thinking about what to say “So what did the nurses say?”
Chris's laughter subsides as he leans back against the bench, his expression growing more serious “Nothing much.. I just sprained my foot and my wrist, but nothing much”
“Nothing much?!” I say slightly shocked with his words.
Chris chuckles softly, shaking his head at my reaction. "Okay, maybe it's a bit more than 'nothing much,' but I'll survive" He says with a reassuring smile, though I can see the pain behind his eyes.
I gently reach his injured hand, my thumb tracing comforting circles on the back of his hand. "I'm just glad it's nothing too serious," I say softly, my voice filled with genuine concern. "But still, I can't believe Cameron did that to you! He's such a pussy!" My last sentence makes Chris laugh again.
As I watch him, a sense of relief washes over me, knowing that despite everything, we are still able to find humor in the situation.
Some minutes talking until the silence fills back the room. We are definitely both thinking about the argument we had days ago, cause we didn’t talked since.
“I.. I wasn’t expecting for you to watch the game today” Chris says slightly looking down.
I stay in silence for some seconds “Listen, Chris" I begin, my voice soft but determined "About the arguments we've been having lately.. I know things haven't been the best.. But..” I sigh “But I still care about you, and I always will.”
Chris looks up at me, his eyes softening with emotion as he listens to my words. "I care about you too" He says, his voice filled with sincerity. "I hate that we've been arguing so much, especially over stupid shit.. I just.. I don't want to lose you.”
A small smile tugs at the corners of my lips as I reach out to gently cup his cheek. "You're not going to lose me, Chris." I assure him. My thumb brushing over his skin affectionately.
He gently buries his face on the crook of my neck, I lay my chin on the top of his head, and I wrap my arms around him, holding him close.
"I'm sorry for everything," Chris murmurs against my skin. "I don't want us to keep fighting like this."
Now I run my fingers through his hair, feeling a sense of peace settle over us. "I'm sorry too.." My voice sounding like a whisper. "Let's try to work through this together, okay?" He nods softly.
I kiss his head “I love you.”
“I love you too.” He answers quietly.
୨୧
hey, this is the end! i hope you have enjoyed it, if u saw any miss spelling or anything tell me in the comments, please.
also, i think it got kinda confusing cause i was using words on the past and in the present, but idk 😭😭
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zegrasdrysdale · 1 year ago
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Jack Hughes - being a dad
[ daddy's girl ] j. hughes
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paring : dad!Jack Hughes x fem!reader
summary : (Y/N) surprises Jack on his birthday by bringing their eight month old daughter to her first hockey game, which happens to be during the first round of the 2024 playoffs
warning(s) : mentions of birth,
author’s note : i've had baby fever really bad recently so here y’all go. i'm thinking about expanding this into an au universe so if you think you'd be interested in seeing that, just lmk !
༺═──────────────═༻
It's been hard to keep a secret from her fiancé for nearly two weeks so (Y/N) is ecstatic the day Jack's birthday arrives. It's a good thing that their daughter can't speak yet or she would definitely give away the surprise that is planned for that night.
One part of the surprise isn't physically that big, but (Y/N) had to pull some strings and call in some favors to make sure it didn't get to Jack that she is going to the game tonight with their baby girl for the first time. Their daughter will be wearing the other half of the surprise that Jack won't even see until the Devils hit the ice for warm ups.
Needless to say, (Y/N) is very surprised for the day ahead.
Jack's alarm goes off early at seven in the morning the day of his birthday, but (Y/N) is already wide awake with breakfast already made so Jack can have breakfast in bed on his 23rd birthday.
He's been exhausted lately because of how long the first has gone against Carolina. Tonight is game seven so she knows how stressed out and anxious he is. The least she can do is give him a good morning before he goes to the arena for morning practice.
She watches from the doorway as Jack reaches over to the bedside table to turn off his phone alarm. He reaches across the mattress to her side and when he doesn't feel (Y/N) in bed with him, he sits up.
"Happy birthday, my love," (Y/N) softly says as she walks into room. She holds a tray with a plate full of food and a mug with coffee. She sets the tray in front of Jack on the bed after he sits up and crosses his legs. "I thought you deserved breakfast in bed after the past few weeks."
Jack has the biggest smile on his face and watches his fiancée sit beside him. "The world truly does not deserve you baby," he tells her. He leans over and quickly pecks her lips. "Thank you for breakfast."
She smiles and he begins to eat his breakfast. (Y/N) steals a couple pieces of bacon from the plate and Jack looks offended every single time. He tries swatting her hand away but she manages to get some more bacon.
Almost right on time at half past seven, the monitor goes off and their daughter begins to cry. Jack goes to get up and (Y/N) stops him. "I got her," she tells him. "You finish eating. I'll go get her."
Quickly, (Y/N) gets out of bed to go across the hall to their baby's room. She leans down and picks her crying baby up. "Good morning to you too, Reina," she says as she holds her in her arms. "Let's get you changed and get you fed, yeah? Does that sound a good idea?"
Little Reina keeps crying when (Y/N) lays her down on the changing table. She grabs a diaper and wipes to change her daughter's very stinky diaper. She hums to hopefully calm her.
It works and Reina's cries grow quiet. She stares up at her mother with her big blue eyes. She looks so much like Jack and (Y/N) loves it.
As (Y/N) puts Reina back into her pajamas, Jack says behind her, "I love watching you with her. I couldn't resist coming over to watch you with her."
She turns around with Reina in her arms. Her daughter lays her head on her shoulder and coos softly when she sees her father. A smile is on her lips as Jack walks into the room. "You only say that because I changed her smelly diaper," she jokes.
"You said it," Jack laughs. "Not me." He takes Reina from (Y/N). "Good morning, baby girl. You slept really good last night. Was that my birthday present?" Reina giggles and babbles like she's answering her father.
"You keep sweet talking your daughter while I make her a bottle," she tells Jack. "She likes you better anyway."
Jack laughs and begins to sway with Reina against his chest. (Y/N) leaves and goes into the kitchen to make her daughter a bottle.
She tried breastfeeding after her daughter was born, but both she and Reina weren't a fan. It's okay though. Not every baby breastfeeds and it took (Y/N) a while to understand that and to realize that there was nothing wrong with either of them because of it.
As soon as the bottle is warm enough, she makes her way back to Reina's room. She hears Jack talking to her so she stands out of sight so listen for a second.
"I can't wait for the day you come to one of my games," Jack is saying when (Y/N) approaches the door. "You'll get a front row seat to seeing me warm up on the ice with your mom holding you. I won't be able to focus and will probably get yelled at by Nico for paying more attention to you but I won't care. You probably won't even remember coming to the game but I will never forget it. I haven't forget the first game your mom came to after we started dating during my second season. I thought Nico was going to have my head when I stayed right by the glass where she was standing the entire time I was supposed to be warming up. I got an earful from him when I got back to the locker room before the game started but it was so worth it."
She smiles and turns into the room so Reina can get her bottle. "I should've known you never forgot that game," she says. "You guys did win and you scored two goals."
Jack looks over at her and smiles. Reina practically squeals when she sees the bottle in (Y/N)'s hand. "I had to make sure we won," he jokes as he hands Reina over to her mother. "I'm going to get ready to head to the arena for practice. Are we still on for an early lunch when I get done?"
"Reina and I will waiting for you in the parking lot when you get done," she tells him. "Please make sure you shower when you're done so you don't smell like sweat walking into the restaurant."
He shoots her a smile and leaves the room. (Y/N) sits in the rocking chair by the window. She slowly rocks back and forth while feeding Reina. Her eyes are on the rising sun while Reina drinks every drop of the bottle she's being given.
She's thinking about how Jack said he can't wait until Reina comes to one of his games. He has no idea that she's going to be right there for the game tonight.
༺═──────────────═༻
As soon as Jack leaves the apartment to go to the Prudential Center for the game, (Y/N) begins to get herself and Reina ready to go.
The plan is to leave around 5:30, and it's only 4 o'clock so there is plenty of time to get herself showered and Reina bathed.
She starts with a shower while Reina is napping in her room. She makes sure to do a full wash. Shampoo, condition, body wash, face wash, exfoliation, and making sure to shave of all necessary body parts. She waits until Reina is awake to bathe her because, like her father, she gets cranky when she gets woken up from a nap.
Once they're both clean and dry, (Y/N) digs into the depths of the closet to pull out the little jersey she had made for Reina tonight.
Reina looks very cute in the little black Jersey jersey. On the back, it says "Daddy" with an 86 under it. She happily coos when she's secure in the jersey. (Y/N) makes sure to get a picture so she can show Jack after the game.
(Y/N) puts on her own matching Jersey jersey that just has Jack's last name and number on it. It's going to be her last name one day too so she doesn't mind wearing it. The jersey is big enough to be a dress on her so she throws on a pair of shorts underneath so she's wearing pants and puts on black knee high heeled boots. She ties her hair up into a messy ponytail and puts on light makeup.
She holds Reina on her hip and takes a picture of them in the mirror as soon as she's dressed. She keeps them to herself until after Jack sees them at the game. Her daughter seems very happy in her new jersey. Her first jersey.
Right on time, (Y/N) is carrying Reina downstairs to the car. A baby bag is thrown over her shoulder that has extra diapers, wipes, formula, baby ear protection since it gets pretty loud in the arena during a playoff game, and their security passes to get into the family suite after warm ups and down into the players' lounge after the game.
She secures Reina in her car seat with her favorite stuffed elephant. Reina is babbling happily while she plays with the elephant so she gets in the front seat to drive the half hour to the Prudential Center.
Soft children's music is played during the ride to keep Reina happy and (Y/N) sane. All the songs are songs that both Jack and (Y/N) picked so they don't lose their minds during long drives. Reina seems to like them so they play the playlist every time they get in the car.
(Y/N) is shaking with excitement as she pulls into the private parking lots where players and their families park for games. It's hard to find a parking spot. There are a lot of cars so she knows that other wives, girlfriends, and families are here for the game.
It's game seven of round one of the playoffs against Carolina. She isn't at all surprised that the parking lot is pretty much full. She's sure that families that are here for Hurricanes players are parked here too.
As she's getting Reina out of her car seat, a voice behind her says, "Please tell me you brought that little angel of yours with you." She turns and sees Erik Haula's wife, Kristen, and her two kids. "All I've heard for the past few months is how happy Jack is to have a little baby and I have yet to meet her."
With a laugh and Reina on her hip, (Y/N) turns around. Kristen smiles at Reina in her jersey. "Here she is," she says. "Little Reina. She's very excited to be here." Her daughter giggles while she plays with her toy.
"She is so cute," Kristen squeals. "Wow, she looks so much like Jack. They could be twins. It's crazy that we do all the work and they come out looking like their father."
"Right?" she laughs. "All Jack did was tell me to push and held my hand while I screamed and pushed his baby out of me." Kristen nods in agreement and smiles. "Walk with me?"
The two of them walk into the Prudential Center with their kids. She holds Reina on her hip as they walk into the building. They show their badges to security to get to the lounge with the players' families.
Almost everyone in the room gushes over Reina. Her grandparents are the first to get to her. Ellen and Jim Hughes immediately take Reina into their arms. Even Uncle Quinn gets involved with holding Reina. (Y/N) sits with Kristen and they talk about their kids while her oldest runs around with one of the other kids.
One of her favorite things is to talk about her daughter and brag about her daughter. She has the best daughter and she wants to make sure everyone knows that. She has the best daughter and her daughter as the best father. (Y/N) wants the entire world to know that.
At 6:30, the wives and girlfriends are told they can head out to the ice for warm ups. (Y/N) grabs Reina's ear protection before following behind the group. She puts them on as she walks to the ring.
Reina is holding her elephant as (Y/N) stands right in front of the glass. She's playing with the elephant’s trunk when the Devils players all skate into the ice.
They take shots at the net for the first minute or so before each player begins their own pregame warm up.
When Jack skates past the first time, he has to take a double take. When he skates by the second time, he actually stops and looks like he’s about to cry. (Y/N) turns a bit so he can see the back of Reina’s jersey. He pouts and knocks on the glass with the top of his stick.
(Y/N) tries to get Reina’s attention on Jack behind the class. “Reina, baby,” she says. “Look. It’s daddy.” Her daughter looks around then sees Jack behind the glass.
She smiles when she sees her dad. The biggest smile forms on Jack’s lips when Reina looks at him. Reina reaches out and puts her hands on the glass. Jack pulls off his glove and puts his hand up to hers.
“Hey, my loves,” Jack yells through the glass. Reina giggles when she hears his voice. “I gotta go. I love you both.”
(Y/N) waves goodbye with Reina’s hand before she blows him a kiss. Jack smiles again before he skates away. Her eyes follow her fiancé as he zooms around the ice to warm up for the game.
As warm ups end, Jack is one of the last guys on the ice. He takes a couple extra shots before he skates over to them one more time.
The lights dim and (Y/N) shows Jack the pictures she took before leaving their apartment. He smiles and taps the glass to get Reina’s attention. She giggles in response.
She holds up one half of a heart with her hand. Jack completes the heart as the horn goes off to signal the end of warm ups. “Say bye to daddy,” (Y/N) tells Reina. Her daughter smiles and bangs on the glass.
Jack skates off and (Y/N) heads up to the family suite to watch the game.
The first period goes by quickly. Brendan Smirh ends up with a major for fighting Sebastian Aho and vice versa. The Devils are the team to capitalize and Dawson scores a goal with a Dougie assist. They end the period up 2 to nothing after Luke scores an even strength goal with two minutes left, assisted by Ondrej and Jesper.
The second period is worse than the first. Aho scores on a breakaway and Teuvo Teräväinen scores a shorty. It’s tied at two going into the second intermission.
(Y/N) has to change Reina and give her a bottle. She wouldn’t stop crying with five minutes left in the period.
Ellen walks up to her while she’s feeding Reina in the back of the box. “I truly don’t understand how you’ve managed to stay sane all these years while you’ve played and watched hockey,” she admits to her future mother-in-law. “It’s only the first round and I’m losing my mind.”
“You’ll get used to it,” Ellen laughs. “If Jack is going to do anything, it’s stress you out during playoffs. The same thing happened last year.”
Yeah, except the Devils lost in 5 in the second round to Carolina. They made it to game seven this year. “I need him to not do that.”
The horn signals the end of intermission. The lights come up and (Y/N) makes her way back to her seat. Reina finishes her bottle.
Halfway through the period, Michael McLeod trips one of the Hurricanes and he’s granted a penalty shot. The puck gets past Vitek and Carolina celebrates on the bench as they take the lead with less than ten minutes left to go in the series.
She will never admit it to anyone but she uses Reina to hide behind. She uses her daughter to distract her from the fact the Devils are still down with three minutes left.
Lindy pulls Vitek and (Y/N) has to bite her lip before she yells at him even though he can’t hear her. The entire building is on edge as six Devils players get set for the faceoff.
Nico wins the faceoff and gets the puck back to Luke in the offensive zone. Luke passes to Dougie, who passes to Jack. (Y/N) watches Jack slap the puck to the net. The lantern lights up and the horn sounds. The building nearly explodes as the Devils tie the game up late in the third. (Y/N) stands with Reina on her hip and celebrates the birthday boy scoring a goal.
The final minute of play is always the worst when tied up. It's even worse when it's game seven in the Stanley Cup playoffs. (Y/N) is biting the skin around her nails as she watches Vitek get pulled from net one more time.
With thirty seconds left, Nico puts the puck in the back of the net and (Y/N) swears she loses her hearing from how loud it gets in the building.
The horn sounds one more time to signal that the Devils won the first round of the playoffs. Everyone in the suite celebrates while the boys celebrate on the ice.
One round down. Four games won. Three rounds left to go. 12 more wins. They got it this year.
༺═──────────────═༻
It's nearly an hour after the game when the players begin to make their way into the lounge. Jack is one of the first players to come into the room.
His eyes immediately find (Y/N) and a now sleeping Reina in her arms. He makes his way over and sits beside them on the couch. Jack leans over and presses a soft kiss to her cheek. She looks over at him and smiles.
"Congratulations," she tells him. "Can't wait to root for you in the second round."
Jack's eyes are on his sleeping daughter. "I can't believe she's here," he says. "I mean, I couldn't wait to have her come to a game and she's actually here. Was she okay?"
"She was perfect," (Y/N) replies. "Your mom really helped out a lot. It was nice to come and watch without worrying about a sitter at home with Reina. She was very happy to see you during warm ups. She kept giggling and laughing whenever you skated by. She's such a daddy's girl sometimes. It was the best thing I think I have ever seen."
He takes Reina, who just yawns as she's picked up out of her mother's arms. "It means so much to me that you were both here for the game," he softly says. "Glad we were able to pull off the win for you guys. The jersey is a nice touch, by the way."
"Had to let everyone know who her daddy is," (Y/N) laughs. "I've gotten a lot of comments today saying that she looks like you so I think the entire world knows who her daddy is."
Jack laughs and (Y/N) rests her head on her fiancé's shoulder. "Thank you for giving me this life," Jack says atter a moment of silence. "Being here and being supportive even though I know it's exhausting most of the time. You're a great mom and an even better fiancée. Just want you to know that."
(Y/N) picks her head up and meets Jack's eyes. "We have a lifetime ahead of us," she replies. "But lets get through the playoffs before we continue worrying about any of that, yeah?"
He nods in agreement and Reina begins to whine in Jack's arms. He picks her up and holds her against his chest. Reina's head is on the shoulder that (Y/N) had her head on. As soon as Reina sees Jack, she smiles and he kisses her cheek. "Hi, my baby," Jack says against her skin. "Hope you had a nice nap. You've had a busy day."
She smiles as Jack sits Reina on his lap and plays with their daughter.
This is her life, and she can't wait to find out where it leads.
༺═──────────────═༻
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moonydustx · 1 year ago
Text
To belong to you
requests | mastelist Pairing: Trafalgar D. Law x F! Reader Summary: sequel of A not so funny story. In this one, we see Law dealing with a somewhat stubborn reader, while he can barely deal with his feelings. Warnings: fluffy, a little hotter at the end, violence, Law exposing his feelings (this will always be a warning for me). W/C: 3.5K a/c: tried not to take so long to produce, but I ended up getting carried away by the text. Regarding the smutty, I'm thinking about bringing it to a third part, I believe this one was too big. Hope you like.
requested by anon: ok ok now m waiting for a sequel with an overprotective-clingy-lover emo boy Law who keeps reader at his sight❣️ ~ maybe a smutty? idk just give me some more Law
Part 1 | Part 3 (NSFW)
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A week, two days and a few hours.
For a week, two days and a few hours Law's sleep became scarcer - which seemed impossible - at the same time, he seemed to have found a new hobby. You.
Since the fateful day he discovered what he had done, even if unconsciously, Law had made it his duty to be your support point. At the same time, even though he dedicated himself to repairing this mistake, nightmares continued to haunt the little sleep he still had. Some days, it was as if he only revisited the afternoon he saw you hurt. In others, it was as if he was fully aware of what he had done.
You didn't complain about all that attention. Of course, the guilt was clear in his eyes and you wished you could lift such a burden from him, but Law's temperament was already known as irreducible, it was almost impossible for you to become the person who would change that.
Sleep had also left you aside that night. Maybe because you were anxious, the next morning you would be emerging on the next island and you would finally see the sunlight again. Maybe your mind kept playing tricks and unlike the nightmares that Law had, you kept having dreams that were closer and closer to him.
What you had left that night was to catch up on your studies. The small stack of books piled up next to your small green notebook while you had been sitting on one of the cafeteria benches for half an hour facing the same calculation.
"I didn't expect to find company at this hour." Law appeared at the cafeteria entrance. The same tired eyes, but the gentle tone in his voice pleased you. "Sleepless?"
"I've been in bed for a long time this week, Captain. What about you, sleepless?"
"I ended up distracted by reading. I just came to get something to eat." he walked past you, heading over to one of the counters. "Did you remember to drink your tea?"
"Perhaps." you just responded and you could hear him grumble in response. It only took a few minutes for the cup to appear in front of him. "Do I really need to take this? It's horrible!"
"It's a medicine, its function is to be horrible, but to end up curing you." surprising you, he sat next to you. Next to it, a plate with some onigiris. You just looked at Law and your horrible cup of tea. "What?"
"How can such a pretty drink, full of flowers, be so horrible?"
"Drink it." in a way, you knew that his impatient tone at that moment wasn't serious at all. "I promise to reward you."
"Saying it like that, I feel like a child." you grumbled, taking a sip of your drink and trying to avoid the disgusted look on your face. Law, unlike you, seemed to enjoy his late dinner. "Next time, please give me poison. I will die happy."
"Good girl, congratulations." he said, in a cynical tone. Even so, the words pointed to another place in your mind. "I bet it wasn't that horrible."
"Said the one who's gorging himself on onigiri." With your complaint, Law just stretched out the piece he had already taken a bite of.
Maybe your intrusive thoughts, maybe it was just the desire to get the horrible taste out of your mouth, but you accepted what he offered.
She's just taking a piece. Law's mind looped through the seconds you bit the food. The lack of sleep must be playing tricks on him, making him imagine things he shouldn't. Are your lips as soft as they seem?
"So. What are you studying?" Law's brain went blank, searching for the first random topic that crossed his mind.
"Blood. In fact, I took a calculation to do and ended up getting lost. In the book it seems so much simpler."
"Let me see." He set the plate aside and approached your notebook.
Gray eyes looked attentively at each written number and you were busy analyzing it. The smell that came from him was the same as the t-shirt you had worn that day, his eyes had clear dark circles beneath them and even though it wasn't perfectly done, the little beard he had seemed to outline his face and seemed to match the dark tone. of the small piece of his tattoo that showed.
"So…" he began, pointing to the notebook. "Here, you're taking the wrong route. To calculate this type of transfusion, first you have to base it on the patient's weight and then use this formula. See."
You were too distracted by him and he was too distracted by the silly calculation you were so lost in. When he turned to ask if you understood, the only thing he found were your eyes watching him. Just a few centimeters away, his eyes danced between yours and your lips, wondering if the action would be hasty. Maybe it wasn't ideal to take the risk.
"Nerd." You muttered, letting out a small laugh.
"Just smarter than you." he replied, pulling away a little. "Take one more."
"Thank you captain!"
The night passed faster than you expected. Accompanied by Law, you spent most of the night redoing some exercises while he helped you, or at least watched you. And even though sleep hit your body, it was hard to close your eyes and sleep after spending so much time with him.
The morning came quickly and as usual on the days you emerged, you and Bepo were standing just staring at the sun on your skin. Some other companions were already beginning to disembark.
"I found you." Law's voice brought them both out of their little sunbath. "You take care of buying food."
"Ay captain!" Bepo reached out his hand, picking up the berries.
"You." He turned around, looking at you seriously. "No running, no heavy lifting, no long walks."
"All right, boss." you saluted, just to annoy him and watched him leave, without giving much more explanation.
The afternoon passed quickly in the small village. At least in the commercial part of the village, everything seemed very busy and colorful, as well as having huge taverns that you would definitely go to.
In addition to you and Bepo, the two also dragged Clione along for the task, which wasn't enough. Despite the captain's clear warning, you managed to convince Bepo that it was just an idle worry, which ended with you carrying some bags under your back.
"Need help?" the bear climbed Polar Tang first, reaching out to you.
As soon as you appeared in the Heart Pirates captain's field of vision, you knew you were in trouble. The blue dome enveloped you and soon the weight lifted from your back. Instead, two small flowers appeared on the ground.
"It seems the two of them decided to ignore my warning." Law grumbled as you picked up the two colorful branches that were at your feet.
"My fault, there's no need to fight him." you took the lead, going to where Law was standing. Around him, in addition to the bags he had taken from you, were a few small bouquets of plants and flowers, all as colorful as the city they had just visited. "What are these?"
"Just a few missing ingredients can become medicine, tea, ointments." he bent down, plucking a small yellow flower and handing it to you. "Something tells me your favorite is this one."
"Oh, God no." the image of last night's horrible tea came to mind. you held the flower up to your nose. The sweet smell was delicious, but just remembering the taste made your stomach turn. "It's so beautiful, but so bad." you made to return it, seeing him raise his hand and deny it.
"It is not necessary."
"Thanks." you laughed, pinning the small flower to the zipper of your jumpsuit.
"Captain." two humming voices came towards you. "What do you think about going to a bar today?"
"You can go." he responded to Shachi and Penguim, who were not convinced and joined in a chorus of please. "I'm not in the mood."
"Please, Captain. The town seems nice, I bet the bars are too." you joined the other two, interceding.
You knew that Law wasn't the most sociable person in the world, but if there was something you could boast about, it was your power of persuasion - which you hadn't yet realized only worked on him.
"Okay, okay." he gave up, seeing the three of you cheer up and Bepo shouting happily in the background. "However, no alcohol for you."
"Yet?" you grumbled, but his expression already made the answer clear. Your power of persuasion wouldn't work this time.
You weren't the type to take alcohol seriously enough for it to bother you, just going to a new place would be good enough for you. As soon as night fell, you started getting ready. As much as you wanted to wear something lighter, you didn't know how comfortable you would feel showing the scar on your leg, even though it was already partially healed, it wasn't such a pretty sight. You put on pants and a simple, comfortable blouse and headed towards the bar with Ikkaku.
Law watched you from afar. Unlike most of the women there, you weren't balancing on thin heels or with a face so adorned with colors that made your real expression disappear. You were you.
He saw you sit at one of the tables with the other companions. Everyone with drinks in front of them, except you. He could use some alcohol on him to give him the courage he lacked, but he knew it would be unfair. Ignoring the judgmental looks, he ordered two glasses of juice and took them to the table, looking for a place to sit.
"No vodka?" Ikkaku looked at the cup in front of you and the cup in front of the captain. "This is new."
"I'm banned until further notice." you replied, raising your glass to toast your captain. "At least someone had compassion on me."
"So cute." Ikkaku cheered and you surreptitiously tried to elbow her. "So, I saw people playing in the background. She can play, right captain?"
"As long as she doesn't bet Polar Tang." he replied, a shy smile on his lips. As much as he didn't admit it out loud, something woke up in him when the two of you were in some way related. "I think betting a mink could make some good money." he turned to Bepo, who immediately complained.
"Never!" you stood up, placing yourself next to Ikkaku and picking up your glass. "I'll be right back, I'll take the money from some idiots." you smiled, turning your face towards your captain. A soundless thank you left your lips, as you pointed to the glass in your hands.
Law tried to disguise it, tried to ignore your presence. It was as if your body had some kind of magnet, which made it find you in the midst of so many people who crowded into that bar.
The first time he looked at you, you and Ikkaku were side by side singing something that he couldn't hear from where he was, around you some other people were singing and others were playing cards. He could see some looks that bothered him. Why did they look at you like that? Law could feel the repulsion of those men, even from a distance.
The second time, the two of you seemed to be dealing the cards. A man next to you, one of the same ones who was looking at you, seemed to whisper something in your ear that seemed to have offended you. The expression soon disappeared from your face, returning to a calm expression. At that moment, Law could feel his body tingle and had to suppress the urge to make the man's head roll off his body, even though he had no idea what he had said to you.
The third time, the only thing Law saw was your head being pushed against the table, after that he only saw red and pure hatred in front of him. The other crew members with whom he shared the table only noticed a small playing card slowly fall towards the upholstery.
This time you hadn't stolen in the game but apparently some bastard decided you were hiding some cards. You felt your head against the table and you could hear Ikkaku swear. You could easily get out of there and reach for your dagger hidden in your boot, you could also trip and see the guy hit his own head against the table. You knew you wouldn't need to do anything when you saw a blue dome appear in front of you.
Unlike the many times you had seen him fight, Law didn't use his sword or his devil fruit. His hands reached for the man, twisting his arm and slamming his head against the table, ten times harder than what had been done to yours. The other man, who was restraining Ikkaku, immediately released her.
"What happened?" he asked and you knew the question was directed at you, even though he kept pinning the man against the table.
"They thought we were stealing in the game."
"He said we would pay for what we stole from him with money or anything else we could offer." Ikkaku added, as you stood up and untied your clothes.
"The bastard likes to threaten others." Law muttered and within seconds, the man's head rolled on the table, as he screamed desperately, not understanding what had happened. Looking around, Law reached for a small knife and immediately stuck it to the side of the man's head. "Next time I see you, I won't need to use any power to rip your head off."
Law walked away, his eyes immediately searched for you. You had your back to him, checking to see if your friend had gotten hurt.
"Are you two okay?" he walked closer, searching for any signs of injury on the two of you. At that point in the fight, the entire crew was already gathered alongside.
"It's okay captain, it was just that asshole. The others tried to help us." Ikkaku explained.
"Understood." He tried to calm things down, still thinking about what that stupid guy could have done if, for some moment, you had left his sight.
"For today, that's enough." you sighed, trying to give your best smile, which with all the stress caused, seemed impossible. "I'm going back to Polar Tang. I think today's activities tired me out."
You lied, blatantly. You weren't tired, on the contrary. The whole fight, Law showing up to defend you, that had lit you up. The only question that was going through your head was where Law's anger had come from. It wasn't the first time you ended up fighting with someone in a bar and every time Law would just laugh a little or if things got out of hand, He gave a little fright to anyone who even touched his crew. Today the gray eyes that accompanied you so much appreciate you full of fury.
"I'll join you. You guys, enjoy." Law took out some berries and placed them in Ikkaku's hand. "The next rounds are on me."
Bepo made to accompany you two, but was stopped by his friends. They seemed to see the entire situation clearer than the two of you ever would.
The walk to the submarine was quiet, much quieter than you were used to. Despite the beat, your head didn't hurt besides the fact that you saw Law analyze every inch of you after the argument.
Even after entering Polar Tang, silence prevailed between the two of you, it bothered you a lot more than you tried to show. Taking much smaller steps than Law's, you tried to catch up to him before he locked himself in his room and then you'm will only see him the next morning.
"Hang on!" You tried to follow him and even though you couldn't see his face, you knew he had heard you. "Captain!"
"I don't want to talk about it right now." he replied, stopping in front of his room.
"I am sorry but no." you replied and understanding that perhaps you had a discussion too serious to have there in the middle of the corridor, you just indicated the door behind him. "Let's just talk, just five minutes of your attention, okay?"
He could feel the blood boil in his veins, the words burned in Law's throat. Damn that damn bar, damn all the things that still haunted his mind. He had fallen, and fallen hard.
"I understand." you leaned the door behind you, keeping your arms crossed. "I understand all your concern, I mean, you have been carrying a burden that is not yours."
"No?" he laughed, almost cynically. "I won't apologize for that."
"What about all that at the bar?" you asked, approaching him. "About almost killing a guy over a card game."
"He was hurting you." the words came out of his mouth, bluntly.
You stopped a few centimeters away from him, watching him. You wanted to sound intimidating, you wanted to impose yourself on him, but it was him. It was the serious eyes looking down on you, the posture, the smell that emanated from him. As much as your brain tried to deny it, something in you liked - almost needed - Law to protect you.
"You know I'm not that fragile, right?" You held his arms, looking for even the slightest reaction. "I don't break so easily, if that's what makes you worry about me so much."
Law wished he had more time to plan, he wished he hadn't been as close to you as he was last week. That cat and mouse hunt between the two of you worked for a long time. It worked when he watched someone talk for too long over you and he chose to leave his jealousy aside, it worked when he watched you fight so many times and chose not to intrude, it worked when he saw your curves marked by any other clothes you wore ,except the crew's overalls, and he had to try his best not to look. It worked, sentence passed, something left aside.
"I like you." he began, the words coming out like relief from his lips. "I like you and to be honest, I don't know how to deal with it."
"Why not?"
"We are pirates, I have enemies, people who can use this to target me." he pointed to the space between the two of you. "I don't know if I can handle this, damn, I could barely hold my own against a drunk at the bar. I like you too much to risk you."
Just like the day he had seen you injured, his hands found your face, holding it as if it were the most precious thing Law had ever laid his hands on.
"I have a proposal." your hands found his, caressing them. "Here, in this room, just here it will be Law and me. Without all the worries of a captain, without all the responsibilities of a crew member, without fears. Just you and me, one belonging to the other. No one needs to know."
You wanted to say that maybe it wouldn't work and that maybe the two of you would just come out of this story more broken. You could also say that you would understand if he hated the idea. Before any words found the sound of the room, your lips were stolen by his.
None of Law's thoughts matched what he was feeling. Your lips giving way so he could taste a little of you. Your hands left his and spread out over the small gap in the open shirt he wore. Every inch of your body still seemed small for him to explore, his hands went down to your waist, almost merging his body with yours. He could stay there, in that room trapped with you for days. Damn the life of a captain, damn all the rationality he valued so much, you were more than enough.
"So…" you moved a few millimeters away from him, looking for just enough space to catch your breath.
One of his hands went up to your chin, one of his fingers running over your swollen and red lips in an almost sinful caress. How long did he wait to be like that?
One of his hands tangled in your hair, gently squeezing it so you could give him space. Law's lips - now warmer than when they first touched you - ran down your neck. You wouldn't take Law for an avid lover, but the way he held your body to his said completely the opposite.
"I accept your proposal." His low voice whispered next to your ear. His mind took him to dark places, but a little rationality still kept him lucid. "But maybe, maybe we should stop for now."
"No, we shouldn't." Serene eyes looked at him, but the malice in your words was clear.
"Yeah, we shouldn't."
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seredelgi · 9 months ago
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COME BACK TO ME
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fandom: Attack On Titan/ Shingeki No Kyojin
pairing: Eren Jaeger x Reader, Toxic! Eren Jaeger x Fem! Reader, Eren Jaeger x You, Modern!Eren Jaeger x Reader, Dom!Eren Jaeger x Sub!Reader
summary: Not completely satisfied with her sex life and anxious about the impending day of her wedding, reader turns back to Eren, her ex, to get what she misses from her fiancee.
rating: Mature, 18+
warnings: toxic!eren, toxic!reader, toxic relationship in general, smut, sex, vaginal sex, breeding kink, choking, cheating, as in reader cheats on her fiancee with eren, profanity, mild degradation, kind of angsty too, dirty talk, raw sex, light dom! sub! undertones, edging, nipple play, modern au
word count: 3.6k
tags: @anniemika @vlsquuu
a/n: I'm usually not that much of an Eren simp but he honestly fits the toxic ex-boyfriend trope too well, so here. This is really the scrappiest scrap ever but yeah, enjoy. Let me know if I've missed any warnings. English is not my first language so forgive any mistakes.
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You love your boyfriend. You really do.
There's no denying that when he proposed you felt kind of nervous about the idea of spending a lifetime with him, but that's no reason to doubt how much you love him.
He's sweet, he's caring, and most definitely very handsome. " He's quite a catch" your friends constantly like to remind you "Such a step up from that clown you were so down bad for"
Eren Jaeger.
Your girlfriends couldn't stand the guy. And honestly, how could you blame them? He's not been the best partner to you during your time together.
He was obnoxiously self-centered and way too jealous.
You were together a year, but you put up with his shit that long simply because he had one of those annoyingly difficult-to-replace redeeming qualities.
Boy, was Eren good at sex.
Your now fiancee is good too, but that's no match for the way Eren could make you feel back in the day.
And you know it is no excuse for what you did. It doesn't matter how nervous or weirded out you have been about the impending approach of your big day, you shouldn't have called him. You shouldn't have needed to hear his voice so bad, and most definitely shouldn't have hoped for him to invite you over to his apartment, sounding way too smug already in doing so over the phone.
But you can't help it, it's just the effect he has on you. You lose all common sense when it comes to him. He's intoxicating, and that, unfortunately, is part of his damn charm.
However, it is quite difficult to regret any of those decisions right now, sweaty and spread underneath him, taking him deep enough to leave you out of breath.
He's not been able to wipe that stupid grin off his face since he opened the door and met your big eyes, languid already with the denial of how much you missed him.
It's always been like that with him. You got carried away by the nostalgia, you felt the suffocating need to see him again, and then felt ready to bolt the second you were met with his piercing green gaze again.
He hadn't let you, of course.
He took hold of your wrist as soon as you turned around to escape from him. He'll be damned if he won't get his hands on you, after months of pointless abstinence.
He's never properly digested your break-up. He'd let you go reluctantly, but still messaged you, still lingered in your life like a ghost.
It didn't help that you'd continued living in the same neighborhood as him for a while after you two had split.
If you had to be honest, that was the very reason why you hadn't been able to be completely faithful to your new man in the first few months of your relationship. You happened to run into Eren a few times too many, giving in way too easily to his rumblings about how he was sorry, that he should've treated you better.
Well, it's too late now, you had found yourself saying, only to end up getting railed by him anyway.
Who were you kidding? You were too damn weak to resist him.
It only happened twice, and you felt so bad about it that you decided to move from the area as soon as things with your boyfriend seemed to take a good turn.
Eren didn't take it very well.
He called you insistently and left you so many messages that you had to block him on pretty much any social media. But he still reached out to you, one way or another, through some of his friends. He didn't have them write anything to you directly, but they always looked at your stories and your posts and you were positive they reported everything back to him.
That's why you're sure he knew you were engaged when he answered your call that very day.
He just didn't care.
Part of you knows you should despise him for it, that the fact that he invited you over anyway doesn't speak highly of him. However, that's exactly why you called him. You knew he wouldn't give a damn about your approaching wedding. If anything, he'd turn this into yet another stroke at his pride, yet another thing to hold you by the neck with.
And that's what he's doing now while burying himself into you. He wraps his hand around your neck and slaps against your ass so hard that all you can hear is the sound of your pussy milking his length and his rasping puffs of pleasure.
Man, you've missed this.
There's nothing quite like the way he makes you feel.
You're not sure what it is about him, and it's not like you don't get fucked properly by your fiancee. There's something about sex with Eren tho, that simply drives you wild. Maybe it's in the fervency of his touch, so eager to elicit a response that it often ends up ravaging you insatiably. It's like he needs you to like it.
It almost makes you wonder how on earth could you have let all of this go.
But then he brushes the strands of your damp hair off your face and whispers to you:
" Couldn't stay away from it, huh?" his breaths are heavy, and their warmth sinks into your skin like sin itself " Missed me that much?"
You can't help rolling your eyes at that. Whether or not his nonsense ranting is the only reason for it, only you know.
You dip your nails into the flexing muscles of his back and whine so loud into the otherwise quietness of his room that you're sure the whole building has heard that. He must've had the same thought too, because he snickers cockily back at you.
You hate to be so easy to break for him, but there's no helping it, and you can't stop your pitiful whining from pouring out anyway.
" Use your words, princess" he drags out, his hold on your neck tightening " Can he make you feel this good?"
You shouldn't humor him, shouldn't let him know the shameful truth of intimacy with your man, but how can you lie to him now that he's smacking so hard against you that you barely remember your name?
No way any of the men you've had in your life could even come close. And even if reluctant, some part of you needs for him to know.
" Nu-uh, Ere-hn" his name comes out amid quiet pathetic whimpers and he basks gloriously in them, pretty much drunk on the sight of your pleasure.
" Fucking knew it" you can hear his groans reverberating through you, shaking you up from within and making you shiver all over.
You're not prepared for the suddenness of his touch when his thumb comes to rest upon your already throbbing clit, applying the right amount of pressure where you've been aching for it, and you exhale a deep long moan that makes him chuckle and dive onto your neck, to pepper it with kisses and gentle bites.
You're already so close, but if you know him well enough he won't let you off the hook that easily.
" Look at you all dumbed down on my dick" the hand of his that had kept you in a chokehold up until then comes to brush down your lips, parting them sweetly as he looks into your half-lidded eyes " What'd he say if he saw you like this?"
You want to tell him to shut up, that you're not here to boost his ego a few sizes. However, you find compelling the way spite is turning him ravenous on you. And as he skates down your skin to squeeze your breasts you catch your breath, bracing.
He knows how much you like nipple play, something you've been missing lately. Your soon-to-be husband indulges in it, but he's way too gentle for your tastes, and even if you've reassured him that he can go hard on you, that you can take it, he just can't bring himself to.
Eren tho, is a whole other matter.
He brushes them lightly, teasing you, making you shiver from expectation. Your chest swells up to chase the warmth you can feel radiating from his hand, demanding it on you. It's like you're a puppet, dancing around at any pull of his at your strings.
You're dipping your teeth into your bottom lip so hard that you fear you'll cut it, but when he finally pinches you, you free a shrill sob of satisfaction. Pain curses through you like an injection drug, it haunts at those corners of your mind that had been, until then, still reticent to the heat of his touch.
He still knows you so well you can't help but melt into it now, tho.
" Still fancy this, darling?" he twists your right nipple in between his fingertips, toying with it, having you arch your back as a jolt of pleasure runs through your nerves to come pulse in your swelling clit. The little nub is desperately throbbing for him to speed up the pace that his thumb has been reserving it.
You nod enthusiastically, buckling your hips against his, eliciting the kind of hiss from him that reminds you how even though he likes to play dominant, he's just about as much at your mercy as you are at his.
" Shit- Easy, babe" his voice is croaked with arousal, this time around he's pleasantly taken aback by how receptive you still are to what he used to do to you " 'gonna have me nut into you like that"
You bite your bottom lip harshly at that, trying to refrain from letting him know just how much you would actually love that. You can't let a guy like him know. He'd attempt to knock you up in an instant, probably seeing it as the perfect opportunity to claim you back.
And even if there's no chance he could manage, you still don't wanna give him the satisfaction.
His thumb is still grazing lazy circles around your sweet spot, giving you enough to leave you impatiently waiting on the edge, craving your release so bad that you utter a little "please Eren" against his lips. Lips that are hovering way too close to be able to keep resisting them, and they look so good that you almost feel compelled to kiss him.
But you can't.
It would make this too sentimental, too real for you to able to take it.
" Please what?"
He's wicked, but hell, do you like it.
You hear the sound of your juices mixing with his as he stretches you out, a thin line of drool silently streaming down your chin, giving him yet another reason to smirk to himself proudly.
" Please Eren, make me 'cum, please"
Begging him for it has always proved to be effective in getting what you want. He usually felt spurred enough by it to give in immediately. Plus, you've always secretly loved that, too.
This time around it doesn't seem to be enough, tho.
" See, I'm not sure you deserve that, darling" his pace has become unabating, it's starting to sore you, it's starting to make you regret coming here in the first place, especially when he just won't let you have what you want " You were very bad to me, weren't you?"
Nuh-uh.
But you nod anyway.
And that's about the extent of the amount of power he has over you.
You're able to leave him and stop thinking about him, able to start a new life and date other men, able to accept a marriage proposal, even. But the second he's got you, you're not capable of denying him anything.
You're completely at his mercy.
" 'm-hm sorry" you keen, and see a genuine sparkle of surprise arise in his eyes at that, the quivering sense of loss he must've felt the day you deserted him still hidden in there, twinkling like a treasure he just won't surrender.
If there's something you know for certain, if there's anything you'd bet your life on is that he loves you. Sure, it's in that sick, toxic way of his that just about makes you twist your guts and ache for him at the same time. But he does nonetheless, and you've never doubted that.
There's definitive proof of it in the softening of his tone the second you apologize to him.
" Then leave him baby" he's breathless as he begs you, he kisses your lips and you can't deny him, even reveling at the contact, having craved it so bad that it almost hurts. It heightens your senses and makes you hungry for more.
You've missed it a lot, maybe more than you had the rest of it.
With him, it was always so needy. A desperate clashing of teeth and avid chasing of tongues, always wrapped in moans as he selfishly pulls you in. It is so intense that you'd dreamed about it for nights after you had ultimately decided to break up with him.
" Come back to me" whispered in between harsh puffs and meetings of lips " You know you want to, 'can feel it in the way you squeeze me"
Damn, he's so close to cracking you that it's almost scary.
" Can't let me go" chants and prayers of his just add up to the increasing intensity of his pressure on your clit, bringing you so close that literal tears stream down your cheeks, and somehow you know it's not just because of the gut-wrenching need to orgasm.
You just hate that he's right, and it hurts so much, even in the midst of all the pleasure you're feeling.
" You're still mine" fervid kisses cover the skin of your neck, humid little reminders of what you feel for him, and then you feel the fluttering of your walls welcoming the long-awaited approach of your climax.
He can feel it too, because he steadies his movements, and his eyes are trained on your features as you turn to jelly underneath him, incoherent pleads ecaping silently past your lips.
" Like that, yeah" you can hear him only dazily in the background of your pleasure as you shudder against him, and then you feel his lips claiming yours back, giving you no time at all to even catch your breath. He flicks his tongue in your mouth as you cry into him, and it's just the most excruciating kind of evidence that what he's said is all true.
You are his, and you always will be.
And it makes it all the more agonizing that you cannot be.
It's not long before he tears away way from you, his thrusts suddenly sloppier, his breaths ragged and uneven, and he looks at you, still weakly trembling underneath him, looking positively worn out.
That's how he likes you. Satisfied by him, and only him.
" Fuck- Gotta pull out, baby"
You flinch instinctively at that, your legs crossing behind his back, thighs clenching desperately at his hips, and you know you wouldn't do this if you weren't so high on him.
However you're still hazed from the aftermath of your pleasure, and you so don't want him to part from you.
He looks down at you, confounded.
" Don't you play with me babygirl" he threatens, his breaths so short you can feel he's holding on for dear life, waiting for a confirmation that you do in fact want him to nut inside of you " You know I'll do it"
The idea is appealing, and you recall that's something that you two have always played with in the past.
Back when you were together he'd told you to get off the pill, that he was very much capable of pulling out in time when necessary, when really, he just loved the risk. He got off on the idea that he could knock you up at any moment, his only restraint the one of his will.
It should've felt scary, to give him full control on something like that, but he'd always behaved.
It was a game, and it really did a trick on him. It makes him shiver even right now, against the sudden softness you reserve him as your fingers run through his long brown hair. He tilts his head back and hums, chasing your touch as if starved for it.
" Wanna feel you 'cum inside of me" you whisper in his ear, and his eyes roll back, his unchecked growl making you whimper against him when his hand closes around your throat again, shoving you back on the mattress. And then he starts railing into you with renewed intensity, your head bobbing up and down with his thrusts, and it feels like absolute heaven.
" So fucking desperate for it" it seems like your request has relieved his stamina, and you resume your moaning when his other hand comes to grip your hip to keep you steady, his fingers dipping into your meat so hard you close your eyes shut " -haven't changed a bit"
You feel the awakening of a new need, and you chase after it as you can feel him do with his, his cock piercing through you and hitting your cervix with every single snap of his hips into yours.
" Eren" you let out so quietly that he almost misses it, but when he feels you convulsing around him again, your pussy shamelessly sucking him in, he can't take it anymore. He 'cums with a deep grunt and spills all his warm seed into you, staining your walls and marking you down with his teeth buried in the curve of your neck.
You're so high on it that it barely registers, the way he's sucking on your skin greedily, how whatever he's imprinting on it will have to be covered with make-up before you go back home.
When he's done you're still puffing and tamely shaking, a sweaty mess, holding onto him to try and regain a shred of your lost composure.
He's got you good this time around. You didn't expect to come twice, not being used to it anymore.
His pants are thick and hot against your skin, and when he's finally able to better control them he levers himself up to look at you.
" Fuck, I hope I got you pregnant" he smirks wickedly.
You know it shouldn't, but your heart skips a beat when he confesses that to you.
You shake your head feebly and huff contently, you'd missed the feeling of satisfaction that good sex leaves you soaking into.
" I'm on the pill"
He frowns and slips out of you, evident disappointment washing over him.
" Ow, now that's no fun"
You sigh and look at him as he lays beside you, his cock still half-hard and glistening with the remains of your juices.
" See, that's why we can't be together"
He turns to look at you at that, this time around a hint of hurt clouds his green eyes, asking for you to explain yourself.
" Having a baby is not supposed to be fun" you say then.
" Says who?" he retorts promptly, " Damn y/n, that's one depressing way to look at life"
No use arguing with him, you two are just too different. And that's why you get up, the feeling of his 'cum leaking out from you and streaming down your thighs quietly stirring up your not-yet-silent arousal.
You can't lie to yourself. It had felt good to feel him empty himself into you.
Right is the best word that comes to mind.
But it isn't right.
And the disconcerting truth of it is, that no matter how inebriating in the making, Eren Jaeger is a threat to everything you've come to hold dear.
" I gotta go" you mutter before the sight of him laying comfortably on his bed like that could arise in you the need to cuddle up to him and sleep it off.
You can't let yourself, nor him, delude into that fantasy.
" So that's it?" he lets out, one of his hands behind his back, his muscles flexing and his eyes appraising the view of you getting rid of his 'cum with a napkin you'd hurriedly gathered from your purse.
You sure as hell cannot fathom the possibility of showering at his place, it is way too dangerous of an idea, even if very appealing.
You stay silent, unable to conjure anything that could sound remotely appropriate at a moment like this.
" You gonna hit me up again when you'll realize he's not enough for you"
His words sound resolute and resigned, and they hang over the room like venom as you look at him, baffled.
He's calm and collected, even if his eyes betray a hint of dejection that he would never let anyone else ever catch onto. But they're unwavering as if he can predict your future to be intertwined with his.
How can he even stand to feel like that?
How can you?
You gather your things and go for the door, before he could turn even meaner, before he would show his true colors.
" Give Reiner my best, would 'ya?"
You stop short when you hear your fiancee's name. Your heartbeats racing, your breaths quickening at the realization that you had been right.
He'd been watching silently this whole time.
A chill runs up your spine as you close the door to his apartment shut behind you, and you swear to yourself, that no matter how tempting, you'll never give in to the need to see him ever again.
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cheeseceli · 5 months ago
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Love wins all
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Pairing: Jungkook × Gn!reader (established relationship)
Genre: fluff, comfort, late 40s au, drabble (<1k words).
Prompt: "however big, however small, let me be part of it all. You may be right, you may be wrong, but say you'll bring me along."
Warnings: Both y/n and Jungkook struggle financially, they are married.
A/n: This is a mix of the greatest showman with the notebook (although I never watched the latter) | daily click
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"Jungkook, if you let me trip over another rock I swear that I-"
His laugh cut you off, not allowing you to finish your threat towards him. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. We're almost there, I promise."
"You said that a few times already. I miss the light."
You heard his giggles once again. You loved that sound. It never failed to amuse how, even with all difficulties life presents, your lover always managed to find joy in the little things. Like leading you through the sidewalk when your eyes were covered. That seemed to be bringing a lot of fun to him and, although he still hasn't confessed to you where the destination is, claiming this would ruin the surprise, you trusted him enough to literally follow him blindly.
"But we're getting closer every new step, aren't we?"
"I bet people are staring weirdly at us."
"I wouldn't say that."
Now it was your turn to smile, a lighthearted laugh coming out of your lips "we've been walking down this entire road with you covering my eyes, people would be crazy if they didn't find it weird."
"I really don't think it's that weird. Don't worry about that. Instead, focus on this."
With that, Jungkook slowly took off his hands from your eyes and placed you in front of the destination.
As your eyes got used to light once again, you saw a house in front of you. It was simple: a single floor, rather small, with visible dust and some broken stairs. It seemed abandoned for a while, but it had this cozy charm. It seemed like a lovely house, one you would love to visit given the right circumstances. "Where are we?"
"At our home."
You looked at him, speechless, only to find a quite anxious yet very smiley Jungkook. His eyes shone as you looked at them. "Surprise," he nervously giggled.
"You bought this house?"
"I did. I've told you I'd give you a good life once you married me, hadn't I?" not even once he stopped looking at you, trying to understand your reaction through your glossy eyes "I mean, the house is not very big and it needs some adjustments... A lot of them, maybe. But it's ours."
You couldn't believe it. Not once in your life you would've expected this. When you married Jungkook, you never expected gold nor glory. None of you never even saw it throughout your lives, and you genuinely think that you could die without it as long as you had Jungkook's love.
When your lover told you as a wedding vow that he would do the unimaginable to give you a proper life, you knew he was true to his words. But still, him buying a goddamn house for the both of you was not in your plans. As he promised you, you couldn't have ever imagined it.
And yet, here you are: seeing the man you love the most guaranteeing a home to keep your love safe for the following years, all while looking at you like you are the most precious thing in the place, even when considering the current situation.
You really were at a loss of words, but maybe you kept quiet for too long, as now Jungkook was getting nervous. He didn't plan your silence. He didn't think you would've cried. He wished you had at least smiled a bit. But you were seriously looking at him, tears threatening to spill at any second. Did you not like it?
"I know I should've bought the house with you... It's just that I wanted to make a surprise. If you don't like it, then I can... I don't know, I can come up with something to-" you hugged him. Tighter than you have ever hugged him before, maybe just not comparing to how you embraced him when he proposed.
He then remembers that your reaction at the moment was the same back then: speechless at his will to build a future with you.
"I love it, Kook. I love the surprise. I love the house. I love you."
This time he is the one who couldn't come up with things to say. He could never get tired of hearing you say things like that. So he hugged you tighter, bringing you closer to where his heart beats, maybe in an attempt to keep you and your sweet words with him for longer.
Maybe you would never be rich. Maybe you would never wear brand clothes and live in fancy houses, with expensive cars and food. But you had a home. You had each other. And you could never think of anything else you longed for. Your life was complete, and maybe that was the rarest thing to find, yet you and him did.
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Masterlist | you'll probably like: 7:44 pm
Reminder that this is all fiction, this does not represent the members in real life!
Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @butnotmontana @lelewright1234
Dividers by @adornedwithlight | images 1, 2 and 3
248 notes · View notes
theinnerunderrain · 1 year ago
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Love Me Dead [Yan!Boyfriend x Fem!Reader]
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Warnings: Yandere themes, manipulative behaviors, heavily dialogue bc it's just mostly talking and gaslighting, college life, may be somewhat confusing but it's that story that is up to your interpretation!
+
"[First Name]."
A sizable and gentle hand enfolds your wrist, eliciting a startled leap at the unexpected touch. Casting a curious glance over your shoulder, you discern the hand's owner—a figure with a tousle of rich brown locks. The air on campus carries a lingering blend of pumpkin spice and damp rain, while vibrant leaves in hues of red, yellow, and orange blanket the cement walkway, creating a tapestry beneath your feet.
It was none other than your boyfriend, Asuka.
"Why do you keep ignoring me?"
In a hushed plea, etched with concern and confusion, he inquires, his pallid complexion a canvas for the anxious query. A delicate flush graces his cheeks and ears, a subtle scarlet trace, suggesting an earlier pursuit in an attempt to bridge the distance between you.
"Did I do something wrong..? If I did, then just tell me..."
A dance of confusion painted upon your countenance, a pirouette of bewilderment as you gracefully turned, aligning yourself to face him fully. Brows knitted in contemplation, coral lips drawn into a slender seam, your expression spoke the eloquence of perplexity.
"I'm not ignoring you though..?"
"You are..! You barely text me anymore and avoid me around the campus like I'm some sort of infectious disease.."
He spoke anew, his voice ascending to a higher pitch, an accusatory gaze fixated upon you as though your uttered words were mere echoes of deceit. His other hand delicately enveloped your wrist, creating a symmetrical hold that left you suspended in a still, unsettling equilibrium.
"No I'm not..? Asuka, we both have been busy and I can't spend all day messaging you."
In the chill of the season, you grapple with an awkward attempt at reasoning, noticing the warmth and clamminess of his hands. The contrast, his heated touch against your soft skin, sends an uncomfortable shiver down your spine. Asuka, momentarily lost in contemplation, lets his lips curve into a frown. In that moment, he resembles a kicked puppy, the weight of his next words settling heavily in the air.
"..Are you mad at me..?"
In a suspended breath, he momentarily halted, drawing nearer to you. Amidst the bustling backdrop of students hurrying to their classes, you couldn't help but wonder if curious gazes were directed your way, recognizing the peculiarity of your shared moment beneath the open sky.
"Are you still hung up about last time..? If that's the issue then I'm really sorry, and I've already apologized before...!"
As Asuka continued to speak, words flowed incessantly from his lips, a torrent of increasing urgency evident in the rapid cadence of his cherry-toned voice. A palpable hysteria seeped through his every syllable, mirroring the rising heat radiating from his fervent body. It was as though he embodied a ticking bomb, gradually approaching the brink of overheating, poised to unleash an explosive torrent of emotions.
"Hung up on what?"
Inquiring, you sought release, gently weaving your fingers to disentangle from his grasp, a delicate dance to temper the heat that enveloped. Yet, his clasp remained unyielding, an unspoken embrace refusing to relent.
"Hung up on that time when I was being unreasonable and it made both of us late to our classes."
"No..? Why would I be mad about something like that?"
In the labyrinth of his spoken thoughts, you weave a delicate tapestry, attempting to decipher the cryptic echoes of his mention of unreasonableness. Despite the elusive nature of clarity, you gracefully surrender to the intrigue, deciding to waltz within the enigmatic dance of his words, a willing participant in the artful play of understanding.
"No, there's something wrong but you just won't say it...."
Persistently, Asuka insists, and a subtle irritation blooms within you, despite your inner plea for calm. Yet, his next words delicately wound your heart with a touch of sorrow.
"Do you not love me anymore..?"
"What..?"
In incredulity, you queried, gazing at the young man whose eyes teetered on the brink of cascading tears. The threat lingered in the wells of his eyes, poised to spill over and trace the contours of his fevered cheeks. Yet he continues to rambled.
"Ha! Everything makes sense now. All that cold attitude, and you avoiding me everyday. You lost feelings for me, didn't you?"
His voice crescendoed, rising in both volume and pitch as he advanced, closing the distance until his face hovered mere inches from yours. In this intimate proximity, you couldn't help but sense the burgeoning awareness among fellow students, as they subtly turned their attention toward his unfolding, hysterical unraveling.
"Asuka, how can you say something like that?"
You try to calm him down, speaking in a much softer and calmer tone compared to the man, as if you were a mother trying to calm down a crying child.In the hushed cadence of your voice, a gentle river of reassurance flows, seeking to temper the tempest within him. Your words, soft and serene, weave through the tumult like a mother's lullaby, an attempt to pacify a sobbing child.
"You know...If you had just told me normally that you didn't like me anymore then I would have just accepted that as it is."
Yet, like whispers through the air, your words glide past him. Though a subtle calm embraces him, his voice, now a gentle breeze, unveils a softer cadence, a stark departure from the turbulent tone that had echoed before.
"But why'd you have to go ahead and treat me like that?"
He inquires, guiding your hand to caress the contours of his cheek, gently pressing it against the tender warmth of your palm as if seeking solace in its soft embrace.
"Asuka...I understand you're frustrated but I do love you, and I haven't stopped loving you.."
In hushed tones, your words tenderly caressed the air, coaxing him to nestle against your palm. With a gentle touch, you traced the padded side of your fingers across his cheeks, a soothing rhythm to quell the tempest within him. A graceful guidance led you both to a tranquil refuge, where a brown bench cradled the quietude. There were no other students in sight.
"It's just that, everything has been so stressful with finals and stuff....I swear, I'm not trying to ignore you."
You painted on a smile, and Asuka, with an intent ear, absorbed your words, as though orchestrating a delicate symphony of comprehension within the corridors of his mind.
"But how can I be so sure?"
Once you convince yourself of soothing the man's agitation, his voice resurfaces, posing a question that resonates within your chest, setting a subtle cadence to the rhythm of your heartbeat.
"That you're not just saying that, and that you actually mean it? That you still love me?"
In the quiet expanse of a moment, you pondered his words, delicately crafting a response to safeguard the delicate balance of his emotions. At last, your voice returned, accompanied by the gentle caress of your other hand, tracing a tender path beneath the canvas of his eyes.
"I do love you and you should already know that, Asuka."
Your words, like a subtle elixir, lingered momentarily before gracefully permeating his being. He surrendered to your touch, a gentle immersion into the warmth of your embrace, his grasp on your essence unwittingly tightening. Closer he drew, until the shared touch of both your knees wove a delicate closeness, an unspoken harmony.
"I do...?"
"Yes, you do."
In a graceful motion, you extended your arm, inviting the young man into an embrace willingly embraced. He leaned into your touch, his hand delicately finding its place on the small of your back, creating a tender connection. His body emanated warmth, reminiscent of an oven preheated for hours, yearning for the moment when it could be tenderly turned off. In that intimate embrace, moments stretched like delicate strands of time. His hands held firm against your waist, and his chin found solace upon your shoulders, a subtle dance of closeness. The air bore the comforting aroma of cinnamon and coffee, a fragrant reminder of his presence. As the embrace gently loosened, you parted, a reassuring smile gracing your lips.
"Then, it's settled? I promise to make more time for you, so don't go around thinking I don't love you anymore, alright?"
His countenance eased, a gentle nod painting the canvas of his expression. Where tears once traced delicate paths on his visage, they now evaporated, leaving behind a softened countenance. His lips, once adorned with the weight of sorrow, now curved into a tender smile.
"You promise?"
Once more, you inquire, drawing him into a tender embrace. Your hands cradle the back of his head, granting him the sanctuary to bury his face in the crook of your neck. Unmindful of the ticklish dance of his warm breath upon your skin, you remain oblivious to the subtle curvature of his lips into a contented grin. Nor do you discern the palpable brightening of his eyes, responding softly to your words.
"I promise."
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