#and I’m not quite sure what still
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SPOILERS FOR S5 EP11 BUNGOU STRAY DOGS!
I need some wholesome stuff in all confusion I have about the new episode, so here, take some Bram and Aya:

#im processing#stuff happened#and I’m not quite sure what still#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd spoilers#bungou stray dogs spoilers#bsd season 5 spoilers#bsd s5 ep11#bsd bram stoker#bsd bram#bsd aya koda#bsd aya
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I would eat this up so hard
WAIT I DIDN’T SEE THIS ASK BEFORE, TUMBLR HID IT FROM ME!!!
But yeah. At some point I will write it!! I have a bunch of little scenes in my head like that.
#fic tag — to fall is to learn one way#(I guess???)#other scenes I need to write:#Hera yelling at Zeus like ‘I don’t care whether you regret what you did!!! right now you need to STAY AWAY FROM HER!!!!’#(my thoughts on the Zeus situation by the way:#I think he does regret it#he definitely had a moment of ‘wait what am I doing???’ and that’s why he didn’t kill Athena#and why he let Odysseus go#but he’s never going to admit that#so he’s pulling the classic ‘parent who went too far’ move#of just trying to act like it didn’t happen#he’s never going to apologise#as far as he’s concerned? letting Odysseus go WAS the apology#and I think Athena probably understands that#and she really would like to just leave it at that!!!#but it’s not that simple#on the one hand… you could argue that the open arms approach worked!#she doesn’t really fight back at the end of God Games#she just keeps going until she’s literally on the floor#effectively pleading both for Odysseus’ life and her own#and Zeus stops. he listens.#and yet it does kind of seem like maybe he sees it as a trade#like ‘okay. I blinded you in one eye. I’m going to give your friend one last chance to get home. we’re even now’#who knows? maybe after that he’s not quite so quick to throw lightning at people#and maybe Athena really does want to move on#and yet still it comes back to the fact that she asked her dad for help. she did exactly what he said. and then he nearly killed her#and like sure her eye is visible proof that she is not who she used to be#because the Athena of ten years ago would never have gone to such lengths#but she shouldn’t need the proof! it should never have happened!#I just think about all this a lot
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i cant stop thinking about these chat messages . and i can’t even explain why they make me so insane because my brain just keeps repeating What if theyre evil. But what if they’re not
#zeph.text#i watched this vod like a month ago and i still think about zam and subz’s conversations during it too frequently#their early relationship is so dear to me#it’s new and odd and neither of them are quite sure what to make of it but they’re something like friends-#-when neither of them really have that. subz is a recluse and zam isn’t on good terms with many people anymore let alone close with anyone#and it’s a fickle thing but it’s a companionship that they both appreciate#and i’d continue this but i really need to sleep . also this post wasn’t even about them in the first place. wh#anyways yeah. unintentional foreshadowing . i’m clawing the walls and foaming at the mouth#i want to bash my head in with a hammer
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Main character lineup for a western AU of me and @gxdcomplex’s fantasy ocs! Celestine is a rancher, Atticus is his stablehand (who may or may not have a past he doesn’t want to talk about or why he’s run away from it) and Meadowlark is under their care.

[Marrowsnap and Sienna are she/her, Carrion is they/she] And here are the Coyote Sisters’ leaders, the og coyote sisters! They lead a pack of werecoyotes (and all other people willing to travel with them who need a place to belong) and while they try to avoid conflict, they have some mischievous packmates who wind up out of line and go after a rancher’s herd or get into scuffles in town which is a headache for the Sisters to deal with. Because of this they often go head to head with Celestine and Atticus.




Little unfinished comic I made about Sienna and Carrion finding a wanted poster about them. (Gristle was one of their packmates that tried to attack one of Celestine’s cows)
#I love… western au#my art#art#sketch#furry#idk what to call this AU like idk how to tag this#western au#cowboy oc#cow boy#unicorn oc#werewolf#werewolf oc#werecoyote#oc: marrowsnap#Oc: sienna#Oc: carrion#oc: celestine#oc: meadowlark#Oc: atticus#cowboy art#Im still not entirely sure the logistics of Meadowlark being technically Celestine’s cow boy (half cow half boy yeehaw)#Because this was originally just a one off little sexy idea like Woag what if my prince oc was a cowboy. What then#but now I am Too Invested and I’m giving it PLOT and BACKSTORY#and now outside of the kink setting it’s like well. It’s kind of weird. Is he like a cow? Or like a person? Do I commit to him being like a#cow? Or do I just make him like a person (who happens to be half cow) who does the farm cow thing for money as his job??#Yeah the last one seems best. Also easiest#bc I was looking at it. And on paper it’s weird that my poc character would be quote unquote “owned” by a very.. white oc#Taken quite literally bc Celestine has white fur all over ANYWAYS not the point the point is that it was getting kinda dangerously close to#the whole “POC character is treated more like an animal even though he’s basically the same amount of animal as everyone else and this#is normalized and also he is “owned” quote unquote by a very white character” trope and I Did Not Like That
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2024 reads / storygraph
Lockjaw
YA horror
set in a small town, where a boy died tragically in an old abandoned mill
a group of 11yos on bikes are determined to find the monster and hunt it down - while facing the monsters and prejudices haunting their small town
and some teens, including one of the kids’ sister, a genderqueer guy who tried to get out of town but was drawn back, a homeless trans guy and his dog, and the police captain’s son who get drawn into the web of it all against their will
shifting timelines and perspectives from various kids and residents of the town (plus the dog)
#lockjaw#matteo l. cerilli#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#this is a unique and atmospheric slow-building YA horror!#the writing style/format is a bit different from a lot of current YA - it’s a little distant from the characters themselves sometimes#meaning I didn’t feel super attached to all of them; but it also felt like unique storytelling.#There’s the occasional omniscient headhopping that I couldn’t quite tell if it was intentional or not…#It's a little confusing at times and I feel like I didn't quite get everything that was happening; but that’s kinda the point of the book.#you don’t exactly know what’s going on immediately. I think that adds to the atmosphere though.#Especially with the time stuff - but honestly I think that’s kind of the point -the weird haze of an unwelcoming community in a cycle of#violence and it’s more about the characters and community itself.#I think it's partly also my fault for being slightly distracted while listening to the audiobook haha.#Honestly I’m still not entirely sure how I feel about it? But it was interesting for sure.#trans books#(also the girl is a lesbian though it's not brought up as much)
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Tcm is a woman that uses he/him no one will understand me
#skibidi toilet#listen I don’t have reasoning. there’s something … [vague hand gesture]#that’s not quite just masc about him. yet he is a woman to me#I’m tempted to use she AND he pronouns in a fic for him later but idk how legible thatd be for other ppl#I think ttvm doesn’t care what he is; won’t stop ppl from using whatever pronouns#while tsm kinda. idk. leans into ‘spunky boy’ energy???? Yeah that makes sense Sure#Yet still with an air of feminine to him nonetheless…
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*head in hands* oot link is such a tragic character and it makes me so sad
#like everything about him was a lose/lose situation#he had to be a hero at 10 years old#and even tho he got aged up#he was still mentally 10#so of course zelda sent him back in time#he didn’t quite understand what was happening#and having to go your whole life being judged and looked at weird simply because you don’t act your age?#or going through life not aging mentally in a natural way?#I imagine that that would screw everything up#and so yeah going back in time to age naturally was good#but then there’s majoras mask and the whole idea that nobody believes him#I mean. they believed him when he called out ganondorf#but having a 10 year old tell you about the moon falling and giants stopping it and all that#I’m sure a lot of people thought he was crazy when he wasn’t#not to mention he probably was no longer mentally 10 in mm since he not only went through all that trauma#but also was stuck in a time loop#and to top it all off. all the people. all the friends he made#were either gone or don’t remember him#because they never had the relationship he had in the adult timeline#poor oot link :(#and this isn’t to blame zelda at all#I cant imagine how hard it’d be for HER having to send him away#where she’ll never see him again when she def cared about him#just. agh#a lose/lose situation like I said#smiles rambles
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last dying words are a regular thing? and they were collected in the part one epigraphs for some reason? mostly all during the same twoish years?
I’m gonna point fingers and say this is a shard thing
but I need to go look back and see if there was a pattern in the words in the epigraphs that I maybe didn’t pick up on before, because I know sanderson likes his epigraphs
#stormlight archive#cosmere#way of kings#page 270#oh but I am living for the epigraphs in part two so far#I don’t have quite enough to say yet to feel like making an actual post about it#but so long as I don’t get answers (which I’m sure I won’t because what fun would that be)#I’ll probably end up collecting them together at some point and making a wildly incorrect theory#they at least seem like they’re in chronological order#so I think it’s just a matter of which worlhopper is writing them#and to who!#like just going off the#“I realize that you are probably still angry. That is pleasant to know.”#and “I have come to rely upon your dissatisfaction with me. It is one of the cosmere's great constants I should think”#whoever it is probably thoroughly enjoys being annoying#and from the ones I’ve recently gotten to has knowledge on the other planets and shards and their history#and the history of the people controlling(/whatever the correct term is) the shards#so maybe hoid? but that seems too easy#who’d he be writing to??
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My brain keeps reminding me to have fun with the “Chain Meets my OC Links” silliness and I am swatting it away lol
#I mean it’s fun to play with#And having Warriors interact with Power would be quite fun I think#BUT STILL#I doubt that’s something people want to see#And I’m not entirely sure what would happen anyway
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hey you guys know that even if the people inside that submersible are rich billionaires, dying in that metal tube at the bottom of the ocean is a horrific way to die right. like. yeah stupid choices were made by the people in there signing off on a waiver that says the sub is not approved by anyone and they could die. but it’s the fault of OceanGate for knowingly putting people into a Home Depot DIY sub rigged up with an Xbox controller all to make a profit on people’s curiosity.
#ra speaks#personal#oceangate#missing sub#be normal on this post or I’m going to be disappointed in you and hope you grow as person#listen I’m not touching the ‘site of a horrific maritime disaster being used as a tourist locale’ with a ten foot pole#but like the people in that sub are currently going through something incredibly traumatic and will be lucky to survive#and I know we all love to laugh at dumb rich people suffering the consequences of their hubris#but jfc maybe I’m insane but like on a human level can you respect the horror of what is happening to real living ppl for a goddamn minute#there’s also a good chance these folk aren’t millionaires#they’re probably upper middle class folk splurging for the start of summer vacation#‘oh but I bet they’re still rich assholes-‘ THERES PEOPLE IN THERE. THEY MIGHT DIE. WHY IS THIS SO HARD TO GRASP AS A TERRIBLE THING???#me. low empathy: wow this is horrible. I quite literally can’t imagine how the people down there feel but I’m sure it’s incredibly traumatic#dumbasses making memes: haha dumb rich kid and his dad are gonna suffocate in a metal tube lol
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I was worried my genshin s/i design was started to be too intricate but I looked up all the other characters and theirs is just as complicated/detailed if not more than mine lol
#but I’m also not done so like maybe it will be too much by the time I’m done#anywho I’m having quite some fun designing my insert#I still don’t have a color palette#nor am I sure what vision I’d have#but I have time to think about it
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Looks like that video is about a month & a half after The Trade and trevors broken ankle 😣
re: this video… anon 😭 i had suspicions but it is so much worse to have them confirmed that really was like. trevor’s first Public Appearance without jamie AND post-broken ankle which is traumatic in and of itself no wonder every beat reporter was like ‘oh yeah trevor’s just devastated’

wouldn’t you be miserable too if your best friend just got traded and your body betrayed you and what if it was maybe all your fault!!!
#bestie thank you so much for fact-checking me 🙏🙏🥰🥰 i love when y’all come in my inbox & answer the questions i yell into the void of my tag#we are Suffering about trevor TOGETHER in this house. if i scrolled all the way to the bottom of my drafts i think i could find even more#heartbreaking content from before The Trade but we don’t need to suffer that much otherwise the penguin cup of tea is really irish coffee#confirms ALL of my theories about miserable trevor leaning into mason for comfort because in some universes that’s THEIR boyfriend who left#liv in the replies#trevor zegras#mason mctavish#need to go lay on the floor about this one folks. do you think trevor said he would only do it if mason came if he could sit next to mason#right at the end where people were rushing out not stopping to talk tired by the end of the line and not even thinking just to guarantee he#wouldn’t get asked anything because he still has a hard time believing it’s real he keeps thinking jamie’ll be there especially w/his ankle#i’m sure he doesn’t have a great time with stairs so he probably will nap on the couch sometimes and that moment right when he first wakes#up to the bang of the door and he doesn’t quite know he’s awake yet and he thinks it’s jamie coming in? heartbreaker right there bud. sorry#ALSO because I can’t say it and leave it alone I almost put that last bit strictly in the tags but like. there’s gotta be some part of#trevor that knows it’s nothing to do with him but still naïvely believes that if he’d maybe been there if he hadn’t been injured things#could have worked out differently if he’d been there and it’s his fault his ankle broke and do you remember all the interviews jamie gave#about how you never think you’ll be traded and how strange it is to be moving and now i need you to take that naïveté times 1000 for trevor#who of course he never even pictures jamie leaving they were building the core together!!! why would they ever get rid of him!! and if only#trevor had been there to show how important jamie was. what would he have done? literally nothing but that does not stop the emotional guil#from enveloping trevor like a rain cloud and making him sit in mason’s apartment with ice cream bowl in hand. holistic treatment l
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I am once again having a sexuality crisis (read: wondering if I’m a lesbian or just have been stuck in my hometown for too long yet again and therefore haven’t seen a man who doesn’t look vaguely like a fish in years)
#here’s the problem as i understand it#i have had romantic feelings for several men and i also find quite a lot of men attractive#i don’t know if it’s just because i feel more comfortable feeling and displaying attraction to men because it’s what society expects#or if this is something that is actually genuinely coming from me#and at this point i overthink it so much i would really never know if it’s organic or not#what i DO know is i am not sexually attracted to men at all. when i’ve hooked up with men they do nothing for me#i can conjure up the perfect man in my mind; fantasise about him and nothing happens#this does not happen to me with women#i feel like i’ve been romantically attracted to way less women than men but also physically and sexually attracted to women a lot more ofte#and again — i don’t know if this is society & my own psychology messing with my sense of attraction#because obviously female nudity and sexualisation is all over the place all of the time#when i was younger i actually just thought women were objectively more attractive than men and that everyone thought that lol#i thought my friends were exaggerating when they said they wanted to kiss or have sex with men#i still to some degree think that. like it’s hard for me to imagine being enthusiastic about sex with a man#but can i imagine being in love with one? ehhhhhh… probably#see but what is the POINT if i’d never want to have sex with him? i know asexuals exist but i’m not one#i’d be setting myself up for an unsatisfying sex life#so it seems to make more sense to me to take the overall concept of dating men off the table since it’s not productive and can’t satisfy me#but then what if i fall in love with one anyway. what then. that’d be just my luck#no label ever seems to fit what i have going on with me and i don’t know if that’s because the main thing that’s going on is my head isn’t#screwed on right and i overthink and pathologise every experience i have#can’t even have a crush without wondering if i’m just doing it to get some excitement in my life#i’m not even sure any of it exists. maybe i should just declare myself aroace to give everyone else some peace#personal
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i’m not entirely sure if it counts, but the closest thing hypmic i think has gotten to this as a concept is the base line melody that loops throughout ore ga ichiro (underneath all the keyboard noises and synth) is the main melody in faces, except in faces it’s in reverse. ichiro may not have entirely been calling out rei but rei sure answered lol
#vee queued to fill the void#the stage music does actually tho lol#the oridivis had a very specific sound and in ensemble songs it would mix with the main melody like if you removed their vocals#you would still know which oridivi is up on the rotation and that’s the power of a leitmotif lol#it’s pretty tragic i think that we don’t have like main themes for the characters to play off this lol#like theme melodies the way chuuoku has this siren melody or the tobari bros’ are in the building melody lmao#it’s still crazy to me that the tobari bros are like the only ones who have one LOL#ohhh and now that i’m thinking of it it’s still not quite the same#but if you listen to say dh’s 2nd drb track (this applies to the tracks starting with the 2nd drb)#when rosasa are clearing the air between them the beat on their insert rap is the same beat#it just grows with each turn bc i assume the lore is that their hearts are connecting#and what’s neat about that is i’m pretty sure the only rap rei does in that track has an entirely different beat from theirs#rei’s not quite on their page yet and it’s symbolised thru the music *clenches fist* it is disgustingly good lmao
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To soothe the pain, love, while I don't believe the Doctor - that is 1-12, the others might - ever SAID 'I love you' to River, I am convinced they taught her Gallifreyan just so she'd understand they kept tracing 'I love you' onto the back of her hand at random moments
Awwh! :’) I love the idea of the Doctor randomly tracing Gallifreyan on her skin to express all the things that they can’t say! I’d sort of thought River knew Gallifreyan instinctually with it on the TARDIS screens, but with her connection to the TARDIS being so inherent, maybe there’s no need.
…but now I’m imagining River recognizing (with their lives out of order), that the shapes he’s tracing are Gallifreyan circles. And maybe she’d connect the dots and study Gallifreyan on her own. And then she would understand what he’s writing — and start to take it wrong that he’s writing it but doesn’t have the guts to actually tell her, and she would overthink forever but not actually ask him…
Until the Doctor notices asks why she’s being cold — and then she tells him — and he says he thought she already knew—
(Crying and hugging ensues.)
#I’m a simple woman I like crying and hugging#sure the doctor avoids addressing what he’s writing as they cry and hug. but it’s matter of fact. it’s of course.#You aren’t wrong 😭 the Doctor is a bundle of issues and terror of vulnerability 😭#random tracing of ily is canon to me now ty#maybe she traces back sometimes. maybe they have slow intimate conversations#11 can’t stay still but with River he doesn’t have to run. he can take it slow.#nonverbal and slow#🥰🥰🥰this is v soothing🥰🥰🥰#on such veins I ALSO wish the Doctor and yaz had a mysterious whisper moment while eating ice cream so we could DREAM#fast forward to fourteen gushing love#anyway Moffat may keep his secrets but unfortunately#RTD did straight up ruin the speculation energy by saying tentoo said ily in Doctor Who Confidential…#BUT tentoo isn’t quite the Doctor. it could very well be his Donna half (human half) to be blamed for that#ten intentionally timed his environmental destruction aka burning up a sun to avoid saying ily#(me rambling all this as someone who voted that he said ily to all of them on my own poll)#river song#words by seaweed
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My five happy things for the day
• paper that has a good feeling texture
• things not feeling like an emergency EVERY second of the day, only part of the time
• the fact that these cheapo stamp ink pads from Walmart a few years ago somehow still have a bit of functioning ink not dried out?
• I’m able to track and retain conversations for longer periods of time again, I’m finally finally finally feeling some progress
• putting on a warm hoodie or coat when feeling chilled
#fivethingsaday#I still can’t believe people LIKE me!! ?! ?! ?! ?!#I’ve accidentally wound up dumbfounded with a delightful number of friends#like. wait. I thought you guys were playing a very long trap or were only liking me because of obligation or worth vs hassle ratio.#I thought I was just enjoying it before it vanished! but yowza!!!#apparently I DID get the chance for it to be real#and I am in the middle of living an adult life I didn’t think I’d see!!!#so anyway holy shit I apparently am not secretly a poison to people#these cool people I’ve been so admiring of and wished I could really have a life with someone like them as a friend#BITCH I DO IT IS ME#what the FUCK.#anyway I’ve got to go keep trying to wrangle my very uncooperative knee#and marvel at the slowly-dawning reality of being liked actually not just kept around#god grade school age social hierarchy lessons sure get roots down in deep#I’m so pleased as punch and totally in skeptical disbelief. I’m also delighted and horrifically embarrassed and feeling stupid and feeling#unbearably grateful and feeling quite particularly like I’m in the Truman show and also won the lottery#I’m going to do a lot of STICKING WITH IMPORTANT ROUTINES FOR MY WELL-BEING about it#add to journal
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