#but she shouldn’t need the proof! it should never have happened!

[figureitoutinthemorning]

I would eat this up so hard

WAIT I DIDN’T SEE THIS ASK BEFORE, TUMBLR HID IT FROM ME!!!

But yeah. At some point I will write it!! I have a bunch of little scenes in my head like that.

[dreamwavesexploringreality]

UNCERTAINTY

Chishiya x Pregnant!Reader

Requested: Where Y/N struggles to tell Chishiya about her pregnancy, fearing his reaction since he doesn’t want kids.

Y/N would never have thought that after her experience in Borderlands anything could make her feel that adrenaline again. The accelerated heartbeat and the breath stuck in her throat. She was a responsible adult, at least that's how she considered herself, and she couldn't understand how that could have happened. It wasn't that she was naive; she knew the effectiveness rates and the warnings on the birth control pill boxes: "No contraceptive method is 100% effective." She saw the letters of the message dance, as if mocking her while she read and reread the same line, holding the pregnancy test in her other hand: Positive. She felt her heart drop into her stomach when she thought of him, Chishiya. How was she supposed to tell him?

The next four days after the big discovery, Y/N behaved like a zombie. It felt as if she was living in a parallel reality: she would get out of bed, make breakfast, and go to university. She walked the same streets and retraced her steps to go back home. The shared apartment was always empty when she arrived; her boyfriend had a complicated schedule as a resident at the hospital, and she didn’t mind going to sleep in a cold and empty bed where she would let the tears she had held back during the day flow until she fell asleep. Then she would wake up, the other half of the bed undone, the only proof that her boyfriend had spent the night at home. Then she would have breakfast and go to university. That was until the nausea started. The reality she had been floating through for the past days, behaving like an autonomous being, came crashing down. That fifth day, she skipped class, and then the weekend arrived.

Chishiya had Saturdays and Sundays off, which meant he would be home for those two days. Y/N, therefore, had to make sure she spent as much time outside as possible. She wasn’t ready to face that situation, which was weighing more heavily day by day. It wasn’t difficult. She made sure to leave before he even got out of bed, and when he asked where she was going, she babbled a string of incoherent words, avoiding eye contact as she left through the door, slamming it behind her. She walked through the park until she felt her feet begin to ache, then sat on a bench. The sun’s rays caressed her cold face, and she closed her eyes, trying to clear her mind and absorb the energy she needed to return home. The first thing she noticed when she entered the apartment was the smell of raw fish, which hit her, tensing the muscles in her body and leaving her frozen in the doorway.

“I ordered sushi,” the man said as he opened a plastic container and placed it next to two others on the dining table.

Y/N felt herself pale when she remembered that article that had popped up on her phone after a brief search she did about pregnancy: pregnant women shouldn’t eat raw fish. With quick movements, she took off her coat and shoes and walked past the man without looking at him, mumbling something about not being hungry. Then she entered the bedroom and shut the door, letting herself collapse onto the bed. Instinctively, she placed a hand on her stomach and closed her eyes. She knew very well she was behaving foolishly and childishly, that she should face the situation like the adult she was and get this weight off her chest. But she was scared, terrified of how Chishiya might react… They had never discussed having children, but she knew his stance on the matter. Having children was an idea Chishiya had dismissed from a young age, focusing on his professional success. In fact, she had been surprised when he told her he chose pediatric surgery at the hospital, and when she asked him about it, he just shrugged and spoke about the lack of emotional attachment. He was cold and rational, just as he was, but she couldn’t help but feel her skin crawl hearing him talk so analytically and pragmatically about the life or death of his patients. So it was easy for her to dismiss the idea of a future pregnancy as well; it wasn’t her dream either, and as a busy university student, it was easy for her to let go of the idea that had, for a brief moment, taken some vague shape in her mind.

She took a few deep breaths and eventually let herself fall asleep.

On the other side of the door, Chishiya ate the sushi with a carefree attitude to the untrained eye. However, anyone who observed him more closely would see the man tense in his place, his head almost steaming as he thought and reviewed every situation in the last few months that could give him a clue as to what was going on with his girlfriend. Chishiya had noticed something was wrong from the very first day. He didn’t know exactly what the problem was, as there didn’t seem to be anything out of the ordinary, but for some reason, he couldn’t silence the voice in the back of his mind that warned him that something was out of place. Maybe it was seeing his girlfriend’s breakfast cup on the table instead of finding it in the sink as usual, maybe it was finding her in bed, deeply asleep, her back turned to him, or maybe it was how she had spent the entire week avoiding looking him in the eyes. That night, Chishiya ate sushi alone, with his thoughts.

Days passed slowly, too slowly for him. He was an analytical person, and not knowing what was happening around him frustrated him immensely. Chishiya leaned back in the break room chair, holding a small, steaming coffee in his hands. He looked at the phone he had taken from his bag, now resting on his thigh, while trying to sort his thoughts. He licked his lips and, biting the inside of his cheek, set the coffee aside: "I’ll be back soon tonight. I’ll bring Chinese food." Sent. He sighed once more. He hoped to resolve the matter that very night.

By the time his shift ended, he still hadn’t received a reply, which made him huff in annoyance. He packed up his things and took a moment to fold his white coat carefully while studying and analyzing what his next steps should be.

When he arrived home, carrying a bag full of food, he was surprised to see the woman lying on the couch in her pajamas.

“You didn’t go to class today either?” His voice sounded harsher and more accusatory than he expected. She didn’t take her eyes off the television.

Chishiya sighed as he took the food from the bag and served it on plates. The room quickly filled with the unmistakable aroma of sesame oil and spices, and if it weren’t for his constant state of alertness, he might have missed how Y/N rushed out of the couch, running to the bathroom and kicking the door shut behind her. The man stayed silent and still while holding the container of noodles in his hand. He didn’t need to sharpen his hearing to hear her vomiting. In one calculated move, he gently placed the food down and tiptoed to the bathroom door. He knocked once. Again. No answer, only gasps and weak groans, followed by dry heaves.

“Y/N…” Chishiya called again.

Then the sound of crying came through the door. The man felt his heart twist, it had never felt so heavy.

“Y/N, open up,” he said in an authoritative voice.

He heard the water running, and after a few seconds, the door unlocked. The girl stepped out, pale as ash, her eyes swollen from crying. She passed by him without acknowledging his presence and walked tiredly to the bedroom. Chishiya followed her in silence.

“You have to tell me what’s going on,” he pressed once more as he sat on the edge of the bed, and she settled in, giving him her back. A pitiful moan escaped her lips, and Chishiya feared she might start crying again.

“Talk to me…” he whispered, watching her back.

The movement was subtle and quick, so much so that no one else would have noticed, but Chishiya, being the observer that he was, clearly saw how the girl placed a hand on her lower stomach only to quickly pull it away as if it had burned her. The last piece of the puzzle he needed to complete.

Chishiya sighed and carefully lay down on the bed. He pressed his back against her chest and gently placed a hand on her hips. The girl’s breathing became erratic, and he felt her tremble in his arms.

“When?” he asked, wrapping his arm around her waist and resting his elbow on the pillow to keep his head elevated and look down at her.

She never really needed words to communicate with Chishiya. Once more, fresh tears slipped down her cheek, her gaze fixed on the wall in front of her, avoiding meeting his eyes.

“A week, right?” He tried to push her, pulling her a little tighter against him.

Y/N had no choice but to turn around. With a deep sigh, trying to wipe away the tears on her cheeks, she turned to face her boyfriend. His relaxed and stoic expression surprised her; that was definitely not the reaction she had expected. They stayed silent for a few moments.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he finally spoke, trying not to sound accusatory. Chishiya really wanted to know the answer to that question.

“You don’t want kids,” was all she said, her gaze shifting to the buttons on his shirt.

“I never wanted them,” he replied softly after a pause, reflecting to himself. He stayed silent for a few more seconds. “But if I did want them…” he paused, “…I’d want them with you.”

The girl looked up, surprise and disbelief painting her face. Chishiya gave a mocking smile, and with one hand, he smoothed her messy hair, muttering about how stubborn and incredulous she was.

“Did you plan to tell me when the baby was born?” he teased, earning a soft laugh from her.

“I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t know how,” she responded, trying to free herself from his playful hand, which was now messing with her hair. “So… is all of this okay with you?” she asked when he finally moved his hand, gently resting it on her hip.

There was no response for a few seconds, which made the girl wonder if she had really asked the question out loud.

“If it’s okay with you, then we’ll be okay,” he finally replied, never breaking eye contact.

One single tear, this time of relief, slid down her cheek. Chishiya sighed as he wiped it away with his thumb and spoke.

“I think I’m going to have to throw away the Chinese food.”

Y/N laughed once more.

“You’d better, just thinking about its smell makes me want to throw up.”

The man smiled as the girl hid in his chest.

“We’ll have to order something else, you’re not going to skip dinner,” he said as he stroked her hair.

That night, they ordered pizza, with lots of melted cheese, as Y/N requested. When they settled on the couch, together for the first time in a long while, Y/N felt the world begin to spin again. And when she woke up in her bed the next morning, the man was still by her side, eyes closed, tracing carefree patterns on her stomach with his fingertips.

If she had known he was going to react like this, she would have told him much earlier.

© 2025 [@dreamwavesexploringreality]

[biancadoes1]

I know we want to move past all this craziness. And I agree we should. But I’ve seen comments regarding A and what damage she could possibly do that would warrant things like NDAs and appeasing responses from L and N. People thinking she has no power. And I happen to know of a situation that contradicts that idea.

In another fandom (I won’t name the fandom or the actor), a young actor was accused of… let’s say bad behavior of the criminal kind… by a woman he never even met. The story made its way around the internet. People caught onto it and jumped on the hate bandwagon. He lost his job on a popular show. His career is in the toilet. And his friends/costars abandoned him.

A lie travels around the world twice before the truth even gets up in the morning. Damage can be done. Can be irreversible. And when you love someone, you’ll do all you can to protect them. A (and other side characters) can threaten and be taken seriously. It’s not a leap.

I’m not saying for sure that’s what is happening here. I’m saying that people shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the possible trouble one can cause.

This is a possibility that is very easily swept aside because people think it's too much effort or that this would never be a thing because XYZ.

Also, this is not saying for sure that's what's happening here, so before you get your thongs in a twist make sure you understand this is discussion on the idea surrounding an NDA being in place.

Let's get realistic here. People claiming Luke wouldn't be high profile enough to warrant an NDA for anything is just stupid. Non-disclosure agreements are commonplace - between civilians, businesses and clients, between celebrities and the list goes on.

If there was sensitive information, and it could ANYTHING, then a non-disclosure agreement could be handed out to protect said sensitive information.

You don't need to be Brad fucking Pitt to have an NDA.

What I believe we have seen over the summer when it comes to Luke is very much a contractual agreement of some sort. Nothing about what we saw screams hot boy summer 2.0.

You're also not going to tell me that he just said peace out to Nicola or vice versa after what we watched in Ireland and essentially the entire tour leading up to that.

Sorry. I will never believe that Luke has been with Antonia over a year or that Nicola is dating her friend Jake.

If there's proof of either of these things one day (and I'm talking actual romantic interactions in clear view of a camera, kissing, cuddling etc.) I will gladly go back and eat my words and admit I was wrong.

But I just don't think I am 🤷‍♀️

[thatonesonicfanfictionwriter]

Hey! This one might be a bit different, but may I please request a one-shot of Shadow being face to face with the GUN soldier who killed Maria all those years ago?

Thanks!

“Letting go of the Past”

Pairing(s): None

Requested: Yes (by @grassfedburger ).

Description: Shadow thought he had let go of his rage a long time ago. Turns out he was wrong.

Notes: Ough, the angst potential in this one. Let’s hope I do well, and I hope you enjoy!

(Not proof-read/beta-read.)

(TW: Mentions of death [specifically Maria’s].)

– – – – – – – – – – – –

Today was never a pleasant day for Shadow. Rouge and Omega both knew to leave him alone on this day unless he asked for their company. Hell, even Sonic had learned he wanted to be left alone today.

So here he was, on the way to the flower shop, getting forget-me-nots for her, to put on her grave. But this time, something was different.

Another man was purchasing a bouquet, filled with roses, lilies, carnations, tulips, orchids, and hyacinths. The flowers of apology.

Shadow didn’t think much of it at the time. So he just bought his flowers and left, the owner of the shop giving him a respectful salute as he leaves.

Shadow heads over to her grave, but the same man in the shop is there, placing the flowers down on a familiar grave.

Her grave.

It must have been one of the scientists, Shadow thought.

Not wanting to interact with him, Shadow decided he would wait until the man left to give Maria her flowers.

But he heard something he shouldn’t.

“I’m sorry for that day,” he heard the man mutter. “You two were just kids. You didn’t deserve anything that happened to you on that day.”

Shadow’s pupils suddenly dilate to a small size hearing the man talk.

He recognized him.

He was the agent who killed Maria.

And now, he had the AUDACITY to APOLOGIZE for KILLING HER?!

To say Shadow was mad would be an understatement.

He was PISSED.

He should attack the former agent here for what he did.

…

But he didn’t.

He stopped himself.

Maria wouldn’t have wanted this.

So he waited for the former agent to leave before setting the forget-me-nots atop Maria’s grave.

“Sorry I can’t stay long this time, Maria,” Shadow mutters. “But I’ll visit soon.”

Shadow teleports back to his and Team Dark’s shared apartment, sitting down on the couch next to Rouge, setting his head on her shoulder.

Rouge looks concerned but doesn’t say anything, putting an arm around Shadow, who lets out a sigh.

“Wanna talk about it, hun?” Rouge asks.

“DO YOU NEED ME TO DESTROY SOMETHING?” Omega asks.

“…No to both. I’m fine,” Shadow mutters. “I just don’t want to be alone with my thoughts…”

Rouge nods. She can understand that.

Today was never great for Shadow. But at least he has his friends to help him out when he needs it.

[0vergrowngraveyard]

Tails is missing.

Those three words echoed in Amy's mind as she paced around the Restoration’s control room and to say she was stressed out was a huge understatement.

Not only was Tails one of her closest friends, his big brother didn’t know about it…

And said big brother would be here any second.

They had sent the fox on a simple solo mission. It was easy. Just check out a spot that had a signal where a signal shouldn’t be. He’d done it plenty of times with Sonic so there couldn’t have been any harm in sending him off alone, right?

Wrong. Somehow his comm went offline and his location just vanished. Vanished! Tails never took off his communicator and would make a huge fuss about whenever someone did! He almost glued the watch onto Knuckles’ wrist for crying out loud! Why would he suddenly take his off?

It didn’t make any sense. Tails was way too cautious of this situation to be happening at all.

It was entirely possible that he accidentally turned off his communicator, but the fact that it hadn’t responded for almost 30 minutes shed some doubt on that optimistic train of thought.

Luckily, they had his last known location, which was a few feet away from the point, and that’s why Sonic was on his way over. If anyone could get to that point fast enough, it was him.

Only problem is that Sonic didn’t even know about the kit’s solo mission. Amy didn’t think they had to tell him because Tails was growing into his own hero and, again, it was a simple mission that shouldn’t have even taken him an hour! But, of course, the one time Sonic isn’t involved in any missions that Tails has, it all goes horribly wrong and now she has to explain that to the blue hedgehog who was rapidly approaching her location.

The familiar sound of a dash and volunteers getting angry came from outside the room and her breath hitched.

Chaos, he was here way too soon.

“Hey Ames! Sorry I’m late! Saw a chilidog stand on the way and you know me! Just couldn’t resist.” Sure enough, there was a chilidog in his hand. He took a bite before continuing, “So, what d’you need? What's up?”

If Amy wasn’t sweating before, she sure was now. The way Sonic was staring at her was enough to make her start crying right there. His usual grin and friendly emerald eyes unknowingly stabbing daggers right through her.

It felt like she had betrayed him. His little brother was missing and it was partially her fault. She should’ve just gone with her gut and told him about everything.

She just knew that Tails was working really hard to grow out of Sonic’s shadow (or at least that’s how he phrased it) and she just thought that maybe he’d appreciate getting a solo mission! Show him that the Restoration didn’t just see him as Sonic’s sidekick, but as his own person!

How she wished she could turn back time and stop herself.

“Ames?”

She had been staring.

“Ah! I-I’m sorry, must’ve just spaced out for a second haha!” She laughed nervously leading him over to the computers.

“Ooooookay. So what’s this all about? You said something about checking up on someone?” He asked.

Her heart sank. She had to tell him, there was no dancing around it.

“Yeah… about that,” She anxiously tapped her thumbs together.

Sonic cocked a brow at her, a teasing grin appearing on his muzzle. “Yeah, about that.” The hand not holding the chilidog went to his hip as he leaned into it.

She inhaled sharply.

Just get it over with, he needs to know.

“The person you need to check on is Tails.”

Sonic just stared at her for a few seconds before chuckling a bit. It felt so out of place but he didn’t know that.

“I saw him yesterday. He’s at his workshop.” He took a bite of his food, “Y’know, you should really visit sometime! It’s been awhile!”

When he noticed that Amy wasn’t smiling or looking at all relieved, his grin faltered, “Ames, he’s fine, I’m serious! If you need proof, just check his location!” He brought up his wrist, “Look, I’ll even check it no—“

“Sonic, he’s not at his workshop.” She blurted out before he could check.

The blue hedgehog stared at her as he slowly lowered his wrist. His grin was completely gone, a confused stare taking its place.

“What are you talking about?” He asked.

Amy took a shaky breath, “Please…please don’t get mad…”

Now he looked worried. “What? Amy? I won’t, just tell me what’s going on? Where’s Tails?”

You could always tell when Sonic’s patented “Big Brother Mode” was activating. He just had a certain stare he gave you when you even hinted that his little brother may be in trouble. It was a look of worry, fear, and worst of all, anger.

An angry Sonic was a Sonic you didn’t want to mess with. Not much really made him mad, his chill personality was definitely not just a public opinion, but there were a few things in life that really set him off…

and something happening to his little brother was at the very top of that list.

“Sonic, I..” Her voice shook, “I don’t know.”

—————

Sonic had been having a great day. A fantastic day, even.

He had spent it checking out old spots he and Tails used to make camp at, making mental notes that they should spend the night at a few of these locations for old times sake. It could be a week-long camping trip for them! It had been some time since the two of them slept under the stars together!

Visiting these places made him nostalgic in ways he never knew he could feel. He missed the days when all he and his brother had were a backpack and a few heroic deeds to their name. When their biggest worries were Scratch and Grounder, not gods and wars.

Back when his little brother was the sweetest, most adorable little four year old to ever exist (that was a fact, not an opinion).

They were simpler times.

He was so excited to get back home and tell his brother all about his idea so imagine his surprise when he gets a call from the Restoration saying something about needing to check up on someone who wasn’t responding to any calls only to find out that person is supposedly Tails.

“What do you mean you don’t know?” He didn’t want to get mad right after he told Amy he wouldn’t, but the hedgehog had no idea how long he’d be able to keep his cool. “Just…just tell me what’s going on.”

Amy turned her gaze to the floor for a few beats, tears pricked her eyes. He started tapping his foot impatiently.

He really didn’t want to be mad at Amy. She was twelve years old and, while she wasn’t in charge of the Restoration anymore, she played a huge part in making sure it stayed afloat. She was already under a lot of stress and raising his voice would not help that.

She inhaled before speaking. “We sent him on a solo mission and his comm suddenly went offline.”

She must’ve seen the look on his face because words came flooding out of her mouth to attempt to explain.

“Sonic, I swear it was nothing dangerous. We just had him go check something out! A weird signal! That’s all!” She cried out. “He’d done it plenty of times before! I-I just thought this wouldn’t be any different! I-“

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He cut her off. His tone was harsh and he almost cringed at the way it made her wince. The only thing that stopped him was the fact that his worry for his little brother’s safety was strongly overpowering his worry about hurting his friend’s feelings.

It sucked, but he was a big brother first and foremost.

“Because I didn’t think it was a big deal! He's gone to check Chaos Emerald reading on his own, this wasn’t any different! He probably would’ve even been back by now!” The pink hedgehog reasoned, a few tears had slipped down her muzzle.

“Yea, ‘not very different’. Except it’s very different because it was an unknown signal! Not a Chaos Emerald reading! That signal could’ve been anything!” He didn’t mean to raise his voice but damn it, he was stressing out. “And even when he goes to look for Emerald readings on his own, I still know where he is in case of situations like these! I always know where he is because he’s eight years old, Amy! He shouldn’t even be looking for readings alone but he does anyway!”

He didn’t even realize he had thrown his free hand up, still holding onto the chilidog in the other, and walked a few steps away from her. His free hand was on his forehead as his mind flooded with all the scenarios his baby brother could be in right now. Images of Tails being scared and/or hurt and his screams of pain played over and over again.

Finally, he turned to look at Amy. For a lack of better words, she looked awful. Her quills were a mess and she looked seconds away from breaking down.

“How long?” He asked

“W-what?”

“How long has his communicator been offline?”

It took a few beats for her to finally respond. “Around 30 minutes ago…”

All Sonic could do was stare. The chilidog in his hand fell to the floor with a disgusting splat.

30 minutes. 30 whole minutes. Chaos knows what happened to his little brother and it took them 30 minutes to call him?! Why was he even told to come to the Restoration HQ? He should’ve been at his last known location by now figuring out what happened!

Oh Chaos what if it was too late. It had to be, right? Sure, 48 hours was usually the crucial time when it came to missing children, but in this line of work, even just 5 minutes alone could spell disaster, let alone 30!

“30 minutes…why didn’t you just send me the coordinates?! Why did you ask me to come here?!”

“I don’t know! I- I just panicked! This has never happened before and I didn’t know what to do!” She collapsed to her knees, tears streaming down her muzzle as she held her face in her hands.

He felt bad for yelling at her, he hated yelling at his younger friends, but self control was something that was in limited supply at the moment. He looked at the floor, his quills raised as if the knowledge of Tails possibly being in danger meant that the hedgehog was in danger as well.

His legs were itching to just get out of this damn room.

“I’m so sorry, Sonic…Tails could be hurt and it’s all my fault…I should’ve told you…I shouldn’t have even sent him alone…I’m so sorry…” She cried into her hands.

Sonic didn’t respond to her.

Instead, he looked around the room at all the Mobians who were staring at him in fear. None of them had ever seen the hero this upset before.

“Someone send me his last known coordinates.” He demanded. “Now.”

One of the volunteers at the computer quickly typed something into the device and clicked the mouse a few times. His own communicator in his wrist lit up with a notification.

A set of coordinates on the outskirts of White Park Zone.

With the location already memorized, he gave a nod to the Mobian at the computer who sent him a shaky thumbs up back.

He looked back down at Amy. He wanted to say something, wanted to say that it wasn’t her fault and that everything would be okay, but he couldn’t find his voice.

He ran out of the HQ, pushing himself to go faster and faster. He’d already wasted too much time talking.

‘Hang tight, keed. I’m on my way.’ He thought as the boom of a broken sound barrier shook the area around him.

—————

Somewhere far from White Park Zone, a little fox slowly opened his blue eyes. A headache pounding against his skull as he tried to make sense of the area around him through his concussion.

He didn’t remember much, only the feeling of something hard hitting the back of his head and blacking out. He remembered he was checking something out for Amy, it had been his first solo mission for the Restoration! Except that mission seemed to have gone wrong.

He just hoped his brother wasn’t mad at him.

[fangirlwriting-stories]

Mouse Trap

Summary: Neither Sam or Tucker thought that there was an actual reason Danny abandoned them out of nowhere. Then they end up stuck with Danny in a ghost trap and learn that not only was there a reason, it's a lot darker than they wanted to imagine.

Or: A no one knows au where Sam and Tucker come to the wrong conclusion, but it helps anyway.

...

Honestly, Sam couldn’t picture many ways this day could have gone worse.  The Fenton’s ghost weapons have never really worked right, but she thought they’d at least know how to keep their ghost-proof cages from going off totally randomly, and capturing her, Tucker, and Danny.  If anyone should be safe from these things, shouldn’t it be their own son?  Not to mention that the last thing Sam needed right now was to be stuffed into a confined space that got launched 50 feet in the air with her best friend and her very much former best friend.  But here she was, caught in a cage trap in the trees just outside of school, far enough away that no one had seen it happen, with Tucker and Danny.

Tucker hit his head on the side of the cage when it launched upright, meaning Sam was pressing her jacket into the side of his head so he wouldn’t have to look at the blood, and trying not to look at Danny on the far side of the cage, who was looking around like a cornered animal.

And honestly, that was a bit much.  For as clear as he’d made it that he didn’t want to be around them anymore, what with his saying it to their face, Sam thought he could at least be in the same place as them for ten minutes.

“What day is it?” Sam asked Tucker, focusing her attention very firmly on him.

“Tuesday,” Tucker said with a wince, moving his head slowly down to shield his eyes from the sun.  “And I have a terrible headache.”

“What’s your name?” Sam asked, making sure to not let the worry show in her voice.

“Tucker.”

“What’s my name?”

“Samanth—”

“Shut it.”

Tucker smirked up at her, which eased Sam’s worries a little bit.

“Just hang in there,” she said.  “I don’t think you’ll need to go to the hospital.  We’ll just head to your house as soon as Danny’s parents get here.”

There was a sharp intake of breath that for a second Sam thought came from Tucker, an instinctual reaction to how little he liked hospitals, but Tucker raised his head slightly to look over at the other side of the cage, meaning it came from Danny.

Sam glanced over too, half caring, and found Danny with his head pressed into the space between his legs, clearly trying to calm himself down.  She scoffed and turned her attention back to Tucker, pressing the jacket more firmly into his head wound that took obvious precedence over being around people you don’t like.

Tucker, however, didn’t seem to agree, and a second later said hesitantly, “Uh, you okay man?”

Danny, as the only person “man” could refer to coming from Tucker, jerked his head up so hard he slammed it into the back of the cage.  It made Sam wince despite herself, but he didn’t even seem to notice.

“Hey,” she said anyway.  “Stop that.  I don’t have another hand if you get a concussion too.”

“What?” Danny asked, like he hadn’t noticed the fact that Sam was giving Tucker very unqualified first aid care.

It seemed he really hadn’t noticed, however, because a second later his eyes widened and honed in on Sam’s hands.

“Wait, are you okay Tuck?” he asked, making a half-aborted motion towards the other side of the cage.

Sam stared at him for a second.  “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“I’ll be fine,” Tucker said, brushing past Sam’s annoyance.  “Why do you look like you’re caught in a trap?”

Danny took a turn staring at them at that.  “Have you not noticed the cage surrounding us on all sides?” he asked.

“Dude, it’s your parents’ cage,” Sam said, rolling her eyes.  “As soon as they get here they’re going to let you out and start fretting over you.”

Danny didn’t reply, instead reaching a hand up to grip one of the bars of the cage so tightly his knuckles turned white.  And that was certainly… odd, but Sam had more pertinent things to worry about.

She turned her gaze back to Tucker’s head, and found the bleeding had mostly stopped and hadn’t soaked through her jacket, meaning he was probably going to be okay until someone else got here, the way the light hurt his eyes aside.

She kept her hand pressed firmly on his head, supported with her other arm, but she also leaned back against the side of the cage as much as her position would allow.

“You’re gonna be alright,” she confirmed to Tucker.  “Just stay awake.”  She was pretty sure that’s what you were supposed to do, anyway.

“Surprisingly not feeling that tired, what with the way we’re hanging in an already faulty ghost trap 50 feet in the air.”

“You’ll be fine,” Danny said, looking out the side of the cage, though Sam wasn’t sure what he was looking for.  “It’s not faulty.”

“It captured three humans and launched us into the air with no obvious ghosts around,” Sam deadpanned.  “Who’s to say it won’t drop us all next?”

Danny looked back over at her, but Sam couldn’t read his face.  After a second, he just amended, “It’s not that faulty.”  Then he went back to looking out the side of the cage towards the school.

Sam sighed but didn’t say anything else, and turned back to Tucker.  The wound had stopped bleeding now, but she still wanted to get Tucker out of here sooner rather than later.  She looked outside of the cage, but she couldn’t hear any students still at the school.  It was well past 3:00, after all, they would be on their way home.  But the teachers wouldn’t leave for a couple hours yet.

“Do your parents have like, alarms that go off when one of their traps goes off?” Sam asked, turning back to Danny.

Danny tightened his grip on the bar of the cage.  “Mm-hmm,” he said.  Sam could see his hand shaking a little bit.

“Okay,” Sam said, turning to face Tucker.  “They’ll probably be here pretty soon then.”

But Tucker was still looking back at Danny.  “Dude,” he said.  “They’ll be here soon.  You don’t have to freak out.”

“I’m fine,” Danny said, with a voice that was distinctly not.

“Oh, he’s fine,” Sam snapped, rolling her eyes, and returning her glare to outside the cage.  “He just can’t stand being in the same place as people he knows he’s fucked over.”

“Sam,” Tucker said quietly, leaning close enough that Danny wouldn’t be able to hear.  “I think he’s really scared of something.”

“Oh please,” Sam said, not bothering to keep her voice quiet at all.  “What, just ‘cause we’re caught in a ghost trap—” she stopped.

When she thought about it, it was a real possibility.  Before he had kicked her and Tucker to the curb without a second thought, they’d known he was terrified of ghosts.  He vanished as soon as they appeared, and didn’t show up until after they were gone.  Neither of them had ever known where he went, but he’d always looked worse for wear or shaken when he came back.

And right now they were dangling in a cage meant to trap ghosts.  It wasn’t an impossible leap that one would show up.

“Danny?” Sam said, despite herself.

Danny looked over at her, and yeah, now that she wasn’t denying it, the scared mouse look in his eyes was obvious.

“Hey, we’re in a cage meant to trap ghosts,” she said, keeping her voice low and being as comforting as she could stomach.  “Why would any of them come here voluntarily?”

But that didn’t seem to help.  If anything, it just made it worse.  Danny gripped the bar so tight Sam almost thought it bent, but that was impossible.  Then he shifted so Sam couldn’t see the bar and leaned his head back against the cage, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Hey, dude,” Tucker said.  “It’s okay.”

Danny just glared at him.  “Leave me alone,” he snapped, which, honestly, Sam wasn’t sure what she should have expected.

“Danny,” Tucker said, because he didn’t get the memo.  “Seriously, dude.  It’s okay.  We’re gonna be fine.  You said it yourself, the cage isn’t gonna break and drop us.”

Danny just shook his head and pressed his head back against the bars, squeezing his eyes closed again.  Tucker didn’t say anything else, and neither did Danny.

Sam paused and looked at Danny for a moment, taking in the hunched shoulders and the tension in his face and the shaking hands.  He really was scared of something.  But if it wasn’t the ghosts, then what was it?

A voice came suddenly from down below, loud and familiar.  “It should be just this way, Mads!”

Danny’s eyes shot wide open and he pressed himself back further against the wall of the cage, gaze instantly dropping to scan the ground below them all.

Wait, he wasn’t…

A second later, Mr Fenton appeared, followed closely by Mrs Fenton, and both of them looked eagerly up at the cage.

But as soon as they say who it was, their grins dropped.

“Danny?  Sam?  Tucker?” Mrs Fenton asked in concern, stepping towards them.

“Uh, sorry Mom,” Danny said, waving.  Sam wouldn’t have seen the way his hand was shaking if she wasn’t looking for it.  “One of your traps caught me again.”

Again?

“Oh, for pete’s sake,” Mrs Fenton said, putting her hands on her hips.  “I don’t understand why they keep doing that.”

“Don’t worry Danno, we’ll have you down in a jiffy!” Mr Fenton called.  He aimed his ecto gun at the rope above the cage.

“Uh, wait,”  Sam called.  “Maybe don’t—”

He fired before she could finish, leaving Sam just enough time to spin around and pull Tucker’s already-injured head into her chest before the cage started to fall.  She held Tucker there tightly until it hit the ground a second later, which— ow.

“Okay,” Sam said, pushing herself back into a sitting position.  “There really wasn’t a better way to do that?”

“Sorry, sweetie,” Mrs Fenton said as Mr Fenton went to work firing at the bars at the spots where none of them were sitting.  “We designed it for ghosts, you know.  Obviously we’re not going to give them an easy way down.”

Sam didn’t know quite what to say to that.  After a second, she looked across the cage at Danny, and found him warily eyeing Mr Fenton firing at the bars.

Sam turned to face Tucker.  “You okay?” she asked.

Tucker nodded, and when he pulled back from Sam’s chest she saw that his wound didn’t look any worse.  They’d just head home and let his parents look at it.  He’d be alright.

“Sorry about that kids,” Mrs Fenton said, as Mr Fenton slung his ecto gun back over his shoulder, having successfully blown apart enough of the bars for them to get out.  “A lot of our equipment seems to react to Danny for some reason.  We’re still trying to figure out why.”

Sam looked back over at Danny, who was pulling himself up using one of the bars and not even seeming to notice the fresh cut on his elbow, probably from when they fell.

“Alright, it’s back to the drawing books with this one,” Mrs Fenton said to Mr Fenton.  “We’re gonna have to figure out why it’s not working before we try using it again.”

“Yeah, I know,” Mr Fenton said with a sigh.  He turned back to face the rest of them.  “Do any of you need a ride home?  Danno, you want to come with us?”

“I’m okay,” Danny said.  Sam shook her head, and Tucker did the same after her.

“Alright, then we’ll see you at home Danno!  Sorry again!”

And with that, the two of them walked back towards the school, already talking about how they could potentially fix the cage.

Sam stared after them for a second, not sure what she was feeling.

The first one of them to move towards the shot-open-exit was Danny, and she could see him trying to take deep breaths as he did.  As soon as he got out, however, he turned and waited for both of them to do the same.

“Is your head okay?” he asked, looking at Tucker.

“Uh, is your elbow okay?” Tucker asked.

Danny looked down at the wrong elbow first, which was definitely… something.  Then he switched to his injured one and just kind of stared at it for a moment.

Instead of responding to Tucker’s question, he looked away from his elbow and stepped forward, then started peering at Tucker’s wound like he actually knew what he was looking at.

“It’s a head wound,” he said after a second.  “They look a lot worse than they are.  Just watch it and make sure it doesn’t get worse.  It doesn’t need stitches.”

“Uh, thanks?” Tucker said hesitantly.  “How… how do you…”

“Bye,” Danny said, and walked away before either of them could even start thinking about saying anything else.

Regardless, neither of them said anything for a long pause after he left.

Finally, Tucker turned to face her.  “Sam,” he said slowly.  “He was scared of his parents.”

“Yeah,” Sam agreed, as the pieces clicked together horrifyingly in her head.  “So, we’re officially the worst friends ever, huh.”

…

Okay, upon thinking about it, they probably weren’t actually the worst friends ever.  Danny had still walked up to them and directly said that he didn’t want to be friends anymore and that he wanted them to leave him alone.  There wasn’t much they could do about that.  But if Danny’s parents had been… that, and they hadn’t noticed, that officially made them terrible friends.

And Sam had a pretty good guess as to why she hadn’t noticed.  She hadn’t wanted to believe Jack and Maddie Fenton were capable of it.  She’d known them almost her whole life too, after all, just like Danny.  She and Tucker had sleepovers with them in charge as little kids, they’d played games, they’d grown and matured and learned lessons with them, they’d been disciplined by them before, they’d asked questions about growing up and had gotten answers, just like they had with their own parents.  She hadn’t been able to imagine them hurting her on purpose.

And maybe they weren’t actually hurting Danny on purpose.  Maybe they hadn’t realized Danny had gotten hurt yesterday.  They clearly hadn’t realized that Tucker had.  Maybe if they realized that their inventions were actually hurting Danny, they’d stop.  Maybe they didn’t realize the toll this was taking on him.  There were a million maybes.

But in the end, the maybes didn’t matter.  Because Danny still looked scared when he heard it was them coming.  He’d still reacted like it was perfectly normal that he’d fallen fifty feet and his elbow was bleeding.  He’d still known whether Tucker’s head needed stitches or not.

(And maybe the other maybes were plausible too.  Maybe it wasn’t indirect.  Maybe they’d gotten mad that Danny had broken one too many of their inventions, through no fault of his own, and they had—)

But no matter which maybes were true, the way all of it was affecting Danny was a fact.  And Sam didn’t even need to talk to Tucker to know that both of them agreed they weren’t going to let Danny deal with it on his own anymore.

So, at lunch the next day they searched around until they found Danny.  Somehow, he’d ended up with a lunch tray on the roof.

He looked more stunned than Sam had ever seen him when she managed to push the trap door in the ceiling open and climbed out.

“God, Danny,” she said, pulling herself exhaustedly up and reaching back to help Tucker as soon as she did.  “Could you pick a place to hide that’s less impossible to get to?”

“What are you doing here?” Danny asked, scooting back on the roof.

“We came to eat lunch,” Tucker said, letting his and Sam’s lunch boxes slide off of his arms and drop to the roof.  Sam grabbed hers and walked over and sat down next to Danny, and Tucker followed just behind her.

“What— I told you—”

“Yeah, and we’re telling you to stuff it,” Tucker said.  “Danny, we’ve been friends since the second grade.  If you were gonna get tired of us you’d have done it before now.”

Danny looked away.  “I—”

“You don’t have to talk about it,” Sam said, and Danny turned to her with wide eyes.  “Whatever it is you’re not telling us?  You don’t have to talk about it until you’re ready.  Okay?  Just stop trying to push us away, idiot.  We’re not going anywhere.”

Danny looked down at his lunch.  “I don’t want you to get hurt,” he whispered.

Sam exchanged a worried glance with Tucker.  Then she took a deep breath and reached out to grab Danny’s hand.

“That’s not on you to worry about,” she said firmly.  “That’s not your responsibility.”

Danny shook his head, like he disagreed, but Sam cut him off by squeezing his hand.

“Dude, if we get hurt because we’re your friends, then it’s on whoever’s doing the hurting,” Tucker said.  “Not on you.”

Danny didn’t say anything, but after a second, he squeezed Sam’s hand back, which she was going to take as an answer.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, almost too quiet to hear.

Tucker reached out and put his hand over the top of both of theirs.  “It’s okay,” he said, and Sam nodded.

“We’re staying here, with you,” she agreed.  “No matter what.”

[deansapplepie]

Till THE DEAD do us part| Chapter 19

Chapter 18 Chapter 20

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Chapter 19: After all this time?

Summary: Hershel is recovering and you need to apologize to people that you hurt, even who you never thought you’d hurt.

Warnings: language, mentions of kink, mentions of possible naked people. 18+ MINORS PLEASE DON’T INTERACT.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Grimes!Reader (Rick’s sister)

Word Count: 1.8k

A/N: Not proof read. Just a small chapter cause reader needs to do things right after she made a mess.

Shouts. Shoots. Walkers. Long corridors. An unconscious Hershel in a cart. It was all flashes while you ran for Hershel’s life. When you realized the men were carrying him to his cell and you ran behind them to continue treating Hershel. Questions all around on what happened and you couldn’t answer none of them, the words just didn’t come out.

You and Carol kept stemming the blood. You thought about cauterizing it, but wasn’t very sure of it, so you followed what Carol said. It was heartbreaking, but she knew more about stemming human blood than you. “You were right, we shouldn’t have taken him with us.” Maggie cried in the cell hugging Beth.

You sighed, that was your fault. You let out your anger from Daryl on them. “I wasn’t Maggs. He should be allowed to do whatever he wanted to. I was just being an asshole. I’m sorry, it wasn’t your fault.”

Suddenly Carl appeared with a bag of medical supplies. You were impressed the things he found would be of help to Hershel. “Thanks Carl, it’ll be of help. You did a great job.” You said.

“It looks like the 12 year-old knows how to hand himself.” Carl bitterly said and here you knew you had screwed bad, he heard what you said and even though it was true, the last thing you thought you’d do in your life was hurting Carl.

“Carl, I…” you started to say, but before you could complete the sentence he left the cell.

You breath deeply, fuck… you needed to talk to him, apologize… but you couldn’t leave Hershel. What if something happened to him? What if he needed your assistance?

“Go talk to him. I’ll keep an eye on Hershel. There isn’t much we can do right now. You know it.” Carol told you, she saw how it was eating you alive not to talk with Carl and at the same time the need to protect Hershel.

“Thanks…” You exchanged a look with the woman and it thanked her even more than your words could.

You got up and left the cell to look for Carl. He was having a hard time having to grow up in this fucked up world, and that was scarily molding his personality. The last thing you wanted was for him to not feel safe and happy with you anymore. He was your nephew, he would always be the baby you carried so many years ago. You ended up finding him on the second floor sitting on the platform, his legs hanging in the air, his arms and face resting on the bars.

You sat by his side silently, he noticed your presence but said nothing. He also didn’t move or try to leave. “I’m sorry. I didn’t totally mean what I said earlier.” You told the boy.

“But you meant some of it.” That was his answer.

“Yes, because you weren’t supposed to be responsible to protect any of us. In the old world you’d never do that…”

“The old world doesn’t exist anymore.” Carl answered, he wasn’t wrong, but it didn’t mean it wasn’t less worrying.

“I know.” You answered, and thought a lot more before speaking again. “Adults are stupid. I was angry at Daryl and I let it out on everyone. I’m sorry.”

“Do you want me to kick his balls?” You almost chocked on your spit.

“Carl, language!” You disciplined him. “And, no!”

“No one gave me good examples in the last months.” He side eyed you and you tried to contain the grin that was building on your face. “Daryl and you especially…”

“Tell any of these bad words next to your mom and I’m throwing you through the fence to feed the walkers.” You joked and elbowed him. He snorted, it was good to hear him laughing, it had been quite a time since last time you heard his laughter. “So… does it mean I’m forgiven?”

“I can’t be angry at the best aunt for too long…” he answered.

You side hugged him and kissed the top of his head. “Good, I didn’t lose the best aunt position. I was a little concerned…” you played, being forgiven by him was a great relief in such a crazy day.

Later that day Hershel woke up and was at that moment sleeping safe and sound on his cell, with the care of everyone, but mainly his beloved daughters. When the men got back from their mission helping the found prisoners take a block for themselves they told you everything that happened and how they had to put down some of them, now only Oscar and Axel being alive.

After everything was settled, Rick sent you and Daryl to one of the towers for watch duty. Just as if you were kids that needed to be punished for fighting each other. Once at the tower, you sat your back resting on the wall, legs stretched and a gun and the crossbow resting on it. Silence. A deafening silence.

“Did you sleep well?” You cleared your throat and asked.

“Nah, I can’t sleep well without ya.” He answered. “Did ya?”

You breathed deeply. “I had a nightmare. One of the bad ones.” You confessed, images of it coming back to your mind.

“Why didn’t ya come to me?” He knew why, but he couldn’t really control when the words left his mouth.

“I thought you didn’t want me anymore.” Confessing it out aloud was a little embarrassing.

“I… after all this time?” It annoyed him a little, but he couldn’t blame you for this.

“The way you said it yesterday…” You said. “It looked like it.”

“That’s… Did I ever tell you that Merle already went to jail?” He asked and confessed at the same time. “Where I came from, nobody thought a single good thing about the Dixon’s. They knew my father was no good, Merle was no good… I wasn’t no good. They expected all the time that I’d end up imprisoned like my brother. I know it’s stupid, but I felt it would be true if I stayed in a cell.”

“That’s how you felt, that’s not stupid.” You reached for his hand taking a hold on it. “You could have told me.”

“I know. ‘M sorry.”

“I’m sorry too. For being a bitch.” You looked at him, a small smile on your face. You felt so bad when you fought with him, it didn’t happen very often, but it always made both of you feel bad.

“Let’s never go sleep with things unsolved an’more” He was never one for many words, but you changed it, maybe for the others he was still the grumpy man that would speak more with his expressions than with words. But for you… he was learning how to speak, how to express… and for you he would make a speech if it meant you’d not have a mis understanding like this again. “If something like this happens… let’s find each other and solve things.”

“You got a deal, babe.” You squeezed his hand and then intertwined your fingers.

“Come ‘ere.” He pulled your hand towards him and you didn’t hesitate to put the guns aside and sit across his lap.

You put an arm around his neck and hide your face there, inhaling his scent… you could all be dirty from months on the road, but you couldn’t care less when it was about him, he was always the same, so manly… so… Daryl. “It was very difficult to refuse your hug today in the morning, you know?” You softly said.

“Was it?” He played, you for sure knew how it took a lot out of him to demonstrate things like this somewhere people could see.

“Yeah, and I appreciate it.” You kissed his cheek tenderly.

“Ya saved Hershel’s life today, ya were amazing.” He put a lock of your hair behind your ear.

“I was panicking…” You confessed, but you didn’t need to, he knew it.

“I know, and it’s still one of the hottest things ya’ve ever done.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, he always had the strangest ideas about what was hot. You killing walkers? Hot! You deciding to cut an old man’s leg to save his life? Hot!

“Does Daryl Dixon have a kink on doctors/nurses or something?” You teased him.

“Nah… I don’t got those things. I’ve got ya, ya’re my kink.” He pecked your lips.

“I like the outcome of it…” you pressed your lips against his starting a lazy lovely kiss. You were so glad everything was fine again. You were so glad you solved this misunderstanding.

“I’m going up! I hope you two are dressed!” Carol’s voice coming from the stairs startled you.

You parted from each other and you sat by his side again. “Of course we’re dressed Carol, why wouldn’t we be? We’re on watch duty.”

“Honey, if I’m saying it’s because there’s a reason, and I’d rather find both of you dressed.” Your friend said showing up at the corner of the tower with two plates. “We prepared some food, so I thought it would be a good idea to bring it to you two. We all had a tough day.”

“Thanks Carol.” Daryl took the plates from her hand, cheeks blushed thinking of al the reasons she had to check you were both dressed before finishing going up the tower.

In the middle of dawn Rick came to the tower to take your place, and of course certify you were all good again. You two went back to block C. You walked to your cell, thinking that Daryl was going to his mattress at the stairs. You entered the cell and turned around to see if he was there and was surprised to see him right in front of you.

“You don’t have to Dar…” you said and put your hand on his shoulders. “I understand now, if you want I can sleep outside with you.”

“I ain’t here out of obligation or something, I want to be here with ya. I know ya put a lot of effort at cleaning it.” He caressed your cheeks with his thumbs while his big hands held your face.

“We can let the door open…” you said, you’d do anything so he didn’t feel caged. “If you ever can’t take it, tell me and we’re finding another place for us.”

“Alrigh.” He answered and he could swear after all this months together his heart still skipped a beat when you were so kind to him. “Let’s get to bed, babe.”

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[missmarveledsblog]

Bet on it ( Bradley Bradshaw x reader) part 5

summary : the daunting reality of everything that has happened leaves bradley taking it out on jake and finally finding out why their feud began in the first time and which leave Bradley knowing he really needs to see her and make it all right but can he ?

warning : angsty bitch up in here , not proof read , grammatical errors ( soz)

previous part

 She wanted to wake up , this had to be a sick nightmare that she wanted  no needed to wake up from . some from of terror of the fact she was leaving it had to be . Yet the pain that shattered her heart into a million pieces only proved of how real it was . the best time of her life tainted in the childish action of two men she loved dearly.  The constant reminders she was to face of her own stupidity to  think it was real to think he couldn’t hurt her again .. how fucking wrong she was  . her phone was on constant vibrate as everyone tried to ring and text , they all had to witness the worst part of her life . she sat on the sofa reaching for something,anything to wipe her eyes and  of course it had to one of his stupid  Hawaiian shirts , when she went to the kitchen  more stupid reminders of them both . it wasn’t only bradley’s betrayal , jakes stung just as bad. He knew it all , knew their history   and still done this all for the sake of  the bronco ,  the fact he done it all for his car was something she couldn’t help but laugh at. 

“ kid open the door or i’ll use my spare key”  her dad called  as she ran to the door looking up at the man before breaking down in his arms . 

“ i was so stupid  how could i be so stupid dad” she cried. 

“ you are not stupid and as pissed as i am at those two there’s gotta be more to this “ he sighed leading her into the room shutting the door.  

“ i know you wanna see best in him cause of uncle nick but dad he made me think  .. he had me so fooled i honestly thought he love me and it was all some bet to keep his stupid fucking bronco  , in front of all my friends and family , my bosses. Thank god i don’t have to work my last week  how can i show my face outside that door “ she cried harder.  “ i’m leaving tonight i can  get air bnb til my place is ready but i can’t stay here not “ she stood wiping her eyes.  

“ come on sleep on it please for me “he followed after. 

“ dad i need to get out of here  i can’t face anyone right now i will let you know i’m ok but i am going whether you like it not i can’t stay here , i’ll send money and details for storage unit for my stuff please don’t try stop me” she rushed around . 

“ least let me drive you to the airport” he sighed. 

“ ok but i’m not changing my mind i can stay here with reminder of it all “ she nodded. 

He barely slept and the hour or two he did he was hoping he was waking from a shitty dream . that he didn’t lose the best thing in his life . that he didn’t break the heart of the woman he loved because of something so stupid . fuck he’d sell the bronco piece by piece if it meant he could make it right .   he wished he could go back  deny the bet  and go for her like he should of like he always deep down known .  how she was his forever and now his future look bland it look nothing  in comparison . all the dreams  he had of what his future would look like  it didn’t matter who was going to be there once it meant she was by his side .  in the snap of his fingers it was gone , she was gone knowing he shouldn’t of listened to jake , he should crawled on his hands and knee and begged her to forgive him . to know he really loves her , his feelings for her was why he wanted the stupid bet to end , that they never part of it . everytime he closed his eyes the heartbroken expression , her words of venom in his ear  and he was the cause of it , he couldn’t just get over his ego and stupid feud from when they were barely adult and just admitted he was in love with her long before he even thought of it . he stood looking at her door trying to think of the words that were to come out his mouth , sorry didn’t seen to even come close to worthy and yet it was all he had . the first knock went unanswered ,  then he banged louder til he was thumping the wood in desperation . it was only til her neighbor came out  still half asleep. 

“ she left last night with her dad and suitcase now stop  the banging before i call the cops “  the woman snapped . 

“ what you mean left?”  he felt the bile rise in throat , that dizzy feeling catching up with him big time . 

“ new york , thought she was leaving next week but poor girl was upset when she was saying goodbye , such a lovely girl and great neighbor “ she sighed as bradley waved her off. He couldn’t hear whatever she was saying not that he care that sick feeling that sunk to the bottom of his stomach and the realization that it was too late .  she was gone before he could make it right.

Walking into the base it was loud enough tension was high nat wouldn’t even look at any of them , she was kicking herself for not finding it out sooner putting stop to it . all guilty in the humiliation in their friend when they meant well none of them could raise their head high , none of them could look Mav in the eyes when he walked in .  hangman looked just as rough  like he hadn’t slept nor had he really done much of anything , his hair wasn’t styled to perfection , dark circles in under his eye. He felt shit . he looked shit and he wished he never thought of it , the huge gamble was not worth this risk , he wish he thought of anything but this. He wanted his friends to be happy , he knew they both had feelings for each other but he knew they were too stubborn , her guard was too hight up and his stupid ego  was in the way . 

“ sir .. we are so sorry it wasn’t.. It wasn’t our intention to make y/n sad” fanboy spoke up the guilt hitting him hard knowing if he kept it quiet everything would of been ok , everyone would of been happy. 

“ what were you thinking .. a bet really your grown adults acting like stupid kids and because of that stupidity my daughter is heartbroken and other side of the united states because she cant bare to face the humiliation” he didn’t yell , he wanted to but he couldn’t in his heart he couldn’t scream and yell . 

“ she left?” nat gasped . 

“ she left last night staying in a hotel til she can move into her apartment “ he  nodded knowing the female pilot was just in the dark as he was . 

“ so much for tomorrow bagman “ rooster spat . 

“ i didn’t know she was gonna leave bradshaw” he snapped back .

“ your stupid idea in first place “ bradley stood pushing the chair back . 

“ it was to get your stupid ass to  make a move” he stood before anyone could react  the two charged at each other both angry but yet the feelings being brought out in different ways .. angry at themselves and taking it out on each  other as each hit landed til they were finally pulled apart. 

“ YOU BOTH NEED TO GROW THE FUCK UP , YOU WANNA BLAME SOMEONE LOOK IN THE MIRROR “ Mav yelled as they both panted .

“ i never meant to hurt her , i thought it could be different then what happened in the past sir “ 

“ she told you ?” pete asked shock she wouldn’t even tell him what the whole thing was . 

“ that she froze me out” bradley scoffed. 

“ it wasn’t for nothing she heard you with your buddies , how she was a clingy  tag along that barely gave you space to breathe  , dopey little girl with her head in the cloud and stick up her ass and why did you say all that ? because you buddy asked why you didn’t sleep with her “ jake scoffed. 

“ i said it because they wanted to i didn’t mean it , she was only gone 18 and i brought her to stupid party and they wanted to sleep with her but i said it they wouldn’t  that’s why she stop … god  why did she even give me a chance “ he groaned. 

“ who even are you because i know this isn’t the son of nick and carole “ pete shook his head. 

 “ i pretty sure my dad would of punched me  for it  hell i think my mom would of too ,why haven’t you ? ” he sighed holding his head in his hands. 

“ rest of you go … you two i want to get to the bottom of this because i know as pissed as i am  , there is more to this  “ he stood as the others left . “ know you two start fighting , throwing fist i will take disciplinary action  “ he stood .

“ i was stupid , i came up with the bet hoping it would give his brain a shake and he would grow a pair finally tell her how he really felt it was never to make her the butt of a joke or  to be humiliated “jake started  , his voice even crack and he as well as the other two thought he was going to crying. 

“ i was dumb then and now i didn’t us my brain and it was real everything i said to you that night and those feeling it was real it was all real and now i fucked it up because  i’m a stupid asshole who doesn’t use his head or grow up , she was always there for me even when i didn’t deserve it  phoenix let it slip even when we were fighting she would chip in on presents add it to someone else’s so that i didn’t know it was and then when we were together i was so happy like actually happy for first time in such a long time .. back then when she stopped talking to me i hated her for it i’m not going to lie i did because it felt like i was losing yet another person in my life” he gritted his tears spilling down his cheeks angry at himself present and past. “ if  i just done the right thing instead of what i thought was the right thing i wouldn’t have lost the woman of my dream , i wouldn’t have lost my best friend and i get if your pissed and angry  and i get if you hate me for this Mav i hate me , i hate that i lost her , i hate that i hurt her so many time and now i can’t even make it right” he sobbed hell it brought a tear to jake eyes. 

“You’re not an  idiot .. you do idiotic things yes but  i know you and i know this isn’t you bradley and nothing is too late but you do need to find a way to make it right because you hurt her badly this time  but i of all people know  it never too late” he sighed patting his shoulder . 

“ i have leave right i can put in for leave and go to new york “ he nodded . 

“ i do to , you aint only one who need make this right “ jake spoke up .

“ put in the request and i’ll help you out once it cleared but don’t make me regret helping you bradley” Mav nodded. 

A month in the big apple  she wasn’t crying as much and first week she started was probably the worst first week  ever had .  though the pain of it all didn’t magically disappear well least she wasn’t an emotional wreck 24/7  although crying session in the shower and watching tv was still a regular.  The work element she decided to detach her personal life knowing she was there to learn , gain experience instead of wallowing about the shit show her life really was. It took so many month of her life and it wasn’t taking more, more of the fact she was constantly drained and tired over the emotional turmoil of it all .  she’d made a couple of could she call them friend and marcus was on the same programme the only one who knew what she was going through . why she constantly felt so stressed , why her smiles were masks instead genuine reactions . being the rock she needed , phoenix and beth too even though they were still back in san diego they made sure to keep letting her know they missed her and checking on her .  nat did tell her how both jake and bradley were rough at first she felt some what glad  well not glad but it was nice to know she wasn’t the only one hurting and she wanted to get in contact when she  came out on top of her group she wanted to text jake tell him like she used to and yet she couldn’t she was still hurt , he still hurt her as much as bradley did .  in all that anger , distrust and sadness she missed them both she miss her best friend she missed her life before she found out about the stupid bet. Those thought needed to stop , she needed to stop feeling the pity  finally agreed to go out with marcus celebrate they finally made it as she got ready .  it was getting closer to going , she wanted to text and cancel but couldn’t he’d been  missing out on going out with new friends to wipe her tears and supply her with ice cream as she cried to sappy movies. 

A few hours of sleep and help from people he truly didn’t deserve their help  he and jake were standing in some place  that he was hoping was the right one .  the second the approval was given the two were on a flight to new york , marcus promised he would get her there only because beth told him to .     they both stood thinking of what they could say mentally preparing themselves for it all , more of a chance she would ignore them both and they were expecting it but they weren’t going to give up so easily .  a part of him was excited to see her and bigger part was scared , he was scared because he knew when he did see her how she would look at him differently it wouldn’t be the looks of pure love the two shared.  Watching the door like it was the only thing on the earth he was put on it for waiting to see that face and yet when he did , he seen her smiling  again but it wasn’t real it was a show  put on it was only til they locked eyes when the mask slipped off and the true emotion on her face four weeks and five days and she still look as hurt as she did that night . 

“ you have got to be fucking kidding me “ 

part 6

taglist : @peachmartini @paisleebubbles @kawaiiskeletondragonbanana @djs8891 @shanimallina87 @emosrkool

[sankta-wraith]

To Leave The Warmest Bed I’ve Ever Known

All those scenes of Daemon and Rhaenyra not being able to sleep without each other inspired me, so here’s a ficlet about our favorite pair of insomniacs. Title is from Tis the Damn Season by Taylor Swift.

Daemon’s bed was cold. Of course it was. Everything in this dammed castle was cold or damp, and most things were both. Even the hearths were near impossible to light, and on the rare occasions he managed to coax a fire from one, it did little to pierce the ever present chill that seemed to have surrounded him since he left Dragonstone. Since he left Rhaenyra. After their fight, he had stormed off on Caraxes without a word to anyone, eager to rally the riverlords to her cause, and sure that he would return in a few weeks, a moon at most, with an army flying her banners and serving as undeniable proof of his loyalty and love for her. The flight to Harrenhal had started to temper his rage, allowing regret to creep in. Perhaps he shouldn’t have left so suddenly. At the very least, should he not have first apologized for his words to his wife? But Daemon had never been one for apologies. Much better to return when he had something to give her, and let that do the talking for him. It had, admittedly, been a mistake not to send ravens, but he had not expected to stay for so long, and he was unsure of what exactly Rhaenyra would want him to say. He had considered sending a short, impersonal missive informing her that he had arrived in the Riverlands, and was preparing to raise an army, but worried about how such a letter might be received. Despite their recent argument, Daemon could not bear the thought of Rhaenyra believing he no longer cared for her. Not sending ravens had seemed practical at the time, but he had come to regret it, and now it was far too late. He could not have his first letter after such a long absence be an accounting of his failures. Any way he looked at it, Daemon knew he had failed. He had spent far longer than he intended in Harrenhal, and all he had managed to do was turn the riverlords against him. Daemon hated failing. He wished, more than anything, to leave this cold, miserable place, and fly home to Rhaenyra. Gods he missed her. Her absence was a wound that only grew deeper with each passing day. He craved her presence. The feel of her skin, the sound of her voice, the fire that burned in her deep violet eyes. She was the other half of his soul, his twin flame, they burned together. Not being by her side was a torture worse than anything Daemon had ever imagined. He could scarcely believe that he had survived ten years without her. The idea of just one was enough to make Daemon want to drive Dark Sister through his chest. During the days he could bury the pain of being without her under the physical exertion of rebuilding the castle, and his general annoyance towards everything around him. But at night there was nothing to save him from his thoughts. If anything, his cold, empty bed only served as a reminder of his missing piece. He glared at it, the physical manifestation of his mistakes, then proceeded to drop the expression with a sigh, crawling between the sheets.

Daemon turned to face the side he always left empty, as though he expected Rhaenyra to appear in his bed in the middle of the night. He couldn’t help it, they had shared a bed for six years, during which they had spent barely ten nights apart. Who could blame him if he still left his wife’s side untouched? He stretched his arm out across the bed, reaching for someone he knew he would not find. He let his hand drop to the mattress with a scoff, irritated with himself. He hoped that Rhaenyra was sleeping better than he was. She would need rest after dealing with her Small Council all day, even more so now that Rhaenys was dead. Daemon worried for her. She was prone to nightmares when she became stressed, usually towards the end of her pregnancies, although it had happened again when they were in Kings Landing to defend Luke’s inheritance. She would wake in the night, shaking, often with tears streaming down her beautiful face. When it had first happened, just before Aegon’s birth, he had woken to find her sitting up, a hand over her mouth as she tried to muffle her sobs. He had taken her into his arms, and held her against his chest until her tears stopped flowing and she stilled. He had not asked what had woken her, the hour was late and Rhaenyra had seemed exhausted. All he had done was hold her as she slept, wondering what could possibly have incited such a reaction in his proud, fierce wife. She had given him his answer the next morning. It was normal, she had insisted, for her worries from the waking world to occasionally follow her into sleep, he needn’t be concerned about her. When he had inquired as to what worries had left her so shaken she had hesitated. Daemon, in an attempt to be comforting, had brought his forehead to hers. Rhaenyra’s hand had dropped to her swollen stomach, and she had admitted, voice shaking, that whenever she drew near to the end of her terms, her childhood fears of the birthing bed would return to haunt her. Daemon had drawn her close, promising that she and the child would be safe, and the next night when he found her tearstained and trembling, he had held her again, and the night after, and after that. By the time she was carrying Viserys, she had only to shift closer to him and whisper his name, and he would open his arms for her and stroke her hair until she drifted off. Although she had never said it, Daemon suspected that until then, she had endured the nightmares alone. He had made a vow to himself, on the second night, that as long he lived, she would never have to suffer through it alone. He prayed that he wasn’t breaking that vow. With a sigh, Daemon pulled himself back to the present. His mind had gone down quite the depressing path tonight, although that was becoming commonplace. Still, he needed sleep. He could not lie here and stew in his regret until then sun came up. He let his weariness crash over him, pulling him down into the depths of what would likely be a restless sleep. He hoped he would dream of her, but he knew he was unlikely to be that lucky. Daemon drifted off, one arm still outstretched, reaching for Rhaenyra.

Rhaenyra woke with his name on her lips. “Daemon,” she whispered, hating the way her voice trembled with unshed tears. When he didn’t respond, she tried again, more forcefully.“Daemon,” still, he said nothing. He must be sleeping quite deeply, she thought. She hoped she wouldn’t wake him, he needed sleep just as much as she did. Quietly, she reached across the bed, intending to slip into his arms while he slept, as she had done countless times before. She was met with empty space and cold sheets. She remembered, suddenly. Daemon was at Harrenhal, and had been for some time now. He hadn’t even bothered to send a raven. Rhaenyra got out of bed and threw on a robe. She pulled it tight around herself, as though it would keep away the memories of the nightmare that had dragged her from sleep. It was the same one she’d been having for weeks now; Luke, flying before Vhagar only to be devoured, the scrap of his cloak she had found with Arrax’s wing. Her poor Visenya, scaled and horned and dead. Even her father had come back to haunt her, half his face missing, screaming that he had made a mistake, that she could never be Queen. Rhaenyra shuddered, and walked over to the window overlooking the beach. She felt a sudden surge of longing for Daemon. How many nights had she spent in his arms, head resting against his chest while his heart beat steadily next to her ear? How many hours had he held her, running his hands through her hair and pressing kisses to her head until she was lulled back to sleep? She missed him terribly. She had taken for granted what a comfort it was to have him next to her. When he came back she would appreciate every minute with him. If he came back. Although none of them would say it outright, she knew her Small Council was starting to doubt his loyalty. Logically, Rhaenyra knew she should at least consider the possibility that he had betrayed her. After all, he hadn’t sent a single raven, and they certainly had not parted on good terms. But, for all his faults, Daemon had always been fiercely loyal to her. He was a touch too eager for bloodshed, but he was still willing to defend her against anything. He had proved enough when he took Vaemond Velaryon’s head. Just the thought of him betraying her was more than she could bear. Her husband, the man that she loved, the other half of her soul, turning against her? Rhaenyra shook her head. It will not happen, she thought. Daemon is temperamental, but he will not turn against me and our children. I would rather he be dead. She regretted the thought as soon as it came. As unbearable as the idea of Daemon betraying her was, the idea of a world without him was comparatively worse. A world without Daemon, without his fire, his love for her and their family, a world in which she would never hear his voice again, or be held by him again, or feel his lips on hers. The thought brought fresh tears to her eyes. She blinked them away furiously. He is not dead, nor will he be dying any time soon. He is simply hiding from our disagreement like a petulant child. The last thought forced some of the grief from her mind, but still, the thought of a world in which Daemon no longer lived haunted her. Rhaenyra stalked back to their bed and cast off the robe, before slipping back beneath the heavy blankets. She lay there, until sleep found her, and with it more nightmares. This time, she saw her husband, laying dead on some battlefield, Dark Sister in his hand and Caraxes’s broken body under him. She screamed as she ran towards him, and shook him violently, like she could force life back into him. But he remained still, glassy lilac eyes staring sightlessly up at her. When she woke again, the sun was peaking through her windows, and one of her hands lay stretched out on the bed, reaching for Daemon.

[samgirl98]

Mending a Family 10/?

Prev | Next

Jason finds out shocking news about his family, and Bruce is an idiot who can't admit he just misses his son.

Jason smiled as he pushed Danny on the swing. Lian was laughing beside them. Jason turned toward Roy and grinned at the man as both children’s peals of laughter echoed around them. (Jason had built a swing set, so Danny had something to play with. Next would be a slide.) Raven was talking to Jazz and rocking Ellie. Raven had seemed to become attached to the kids quickly. It helped that they weren’t fully human like her.

Plus, it must be nice for Jazz to have another girl to speak to.

Jason was so glad that Raven had suggested she cloak Jason and his small family so that she and Roy could come to visit. The Bats were still looking for Jason. According to Roy, Batman and Nightwing were going crazy trying to find leads on Jason.

He didn’t know how to feel about that.

A part of Jason hoped that his old family missed him, but a bigger part of him knew that they were only looking for Jason to keep an eye on him in case Jason went insane again. Jason knew their worries were justified.

It wouldn’t happen, though, not with the family that Jason had built. He couldn’t risk losing Danny and, to the same extent, Jazz and Ellie. He had already gotten attached to the sweet baby girl, and Jazz was nice to talk to.

She almost reminded him of Barbara. Barbara, the only person from his past who talked to him occasionally, was the only one who checked on him and ensured he was fine. She sometimes talked to him during patrols, making those nights less lonely.

Jason was brought back to the present at Danny’s and Lian’s giggling.

“Uncle Jay, Uncle Jay, tell Danny I’m your favorite niece.”

“Nuh-uh, Ellie is his favorite niece.”

“Guys, guys, no fighting. Besides, I love my two nieces equally.”

Roy started fidgeting beside him while Lian looked at him, confused. Raven had a strange look on her face. Before he could ask what happened for them to start acting weird, Lian said, “What about Mar’i? Don’t you love her, too?”

Jason looked at Raven and then Roy.

“Who the hell is Mar’i?”

“Jay,” Roy asked cautiously, “Didn’t you know?”

“Know what?”

Roy sucked in his breath, “Mar’i is Kory’s and Dick’s daughter.”

____

Bruce couldn’t believe what Alfred was saying.

“So, you find out my son is alive, have proof, it takes you a few days to tell me, and then you say I shouldn’t look for him?”

“That’s exactly what I did and am saying, Master Bruce. The boy wants to be left alone; I think we should give him his space and let him come back to us when he feels like it.”

“What if the Pits take over, and he goes on a killing spree? What if he gets in trouble? Injured or, God forbid, what if he gets killed?” Again.

“What if—what if he never comes home?”

“Master Jason has suffered enough. If he felt the need to leave home, we should honor that. Besides, he came home once. He’ll do it again. We have to give him his space, Bruce.”

Bruce stared out the window from his office. A part of him wishes he could’ve reconnected with Jason sooner.

Would he have left if Bruce had extended an olive branch?

No, it was too late to think about ‘what ifs’ now. He had to find his son and bring him home. It’s the only way he can keep the world and Jason safe. Bruce had a better handle in Gotham than anywhere else in the world. He would bring Jason back and ensure his boy was again protected by his cape.

He had to. There was no other choice.

Special thanks to rpglady76 for suggesting that Raven cloak Jason and his family. I was wracking my brain trying to figure out how Roy and Raven would be able to visit Jason and had completely forgotten Raven knows magic. I also want to thank Breesperez139 for suggesting I put in Mar'i so I can have even more angst.

@idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @skulld3mort-1fan @theauthorandtheartist @emergentpanda-blog @jaggedheart11 @fisticuffsatapplebees @booberrylizard @fantasticbluebirdfan @thegatorsgooseoose @cyrwrites @kjoboo91 @crystallicedart @amaramizuki666 @spekulatiusmuffin @meira-3919 @kilasmess @bubblemixer @lexdamo @wonderland-daisy @mj-arts-n-stuff @amyheart19 @dolfay @the-church-grimm @undead-essence @aph-mable @lizisipancardo @purrloin77 @writer-extraodinaire @charlietheepic7 @sinfulloccultist @nootherusernameworked @coruscateselene @chaoticchange @itsberrydreemurstuff @gmkelz11 @feral-bunny31 @paroovian @thatonegaybitch68 @d4ydr34min9 @overtherose @fandomwandererer @vipower001 @thordottir45 @blackrabbitt3t @rosecinnamonbun @bianca-hooks123 @epilepticnerd @dat1angel @consouling @flamingenchiladadragon

[gaysindistress]

Sad girl - seven

summary: James has an interesting new business proposal and one hell of a condition to deal with.

pairing: Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader

warnings: cursing, guns, violence (it is a mob au after all), Bucky’s smartass, John Walker being a dick, arguing, sexual tension, being held at gunpoint

word count: 3.2k

part 6 | series masterlist

taglist:  @missvelvetsstuff @angelsincident @spencerreidisagorgman @  goldensunflowe-r   @i-have-no-life-charlie @esposadomd @reader-without-a-story @unaxv @iateall-yourcookies  littlelizardlizzie @alana4610 0 @kandis-mom

disclaimer: credits to original creator/poster of image/gif. found on google/Pinterest

She shouldn’t have trusted Steve to not say anything to James. He’s his right-hand man, from what she can tell, so, of course, he’s going to rat her out. His frustration is evident in the way he keeps flexing his hand, curling it into a fist and relaxing it. They’ve been sitting in his office for about 10 minutes now and neither of them has spoken, waiting for the other to speak up. She's assuming that Steve had texted him when they were driving back to James’ house. She should’ve just thrown her phone out of the window to avoid all of this. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Why would I need to? He’s relatively harmless.” 

“No one we know is harmless, Doll. You should know that and especially considering how he’s involved with your family.” 

She stands up from the couch and places both hands on his desk, leaning over to try and intimidate him. 

“Pepper so kindly told me what happened. Not that I care but why didn’t you tell me?” 

His eyes briefly flicker to the “B” necklace that’s hidden under her blouse collar before meeting her stare. 

“I assumed you either already knew or didn’t want to know. I’m sorry for not talking to you about it earlier.” 

“Oh wow, the big bad James Barnes is apologizing to me. Let me get my phone so I can video this and get proof that you’re not always right.” 

James grins at her remark, standing and leaning forward as well, “I never claimed to always be right but you’re right I am apologizing. Is there anything else you’d like to know?” 

She tries her hardest to not shrink under his blue eyes but the intensity forces her to break away and retake her place in the chair behind her. 

“Yeah, everything.” 

His eyes glint satisfaction as she backs down to him so easily. 

“Your father was getting his vibranium from the Wakandans but Namor came to him, offering to cut the costs in exchange for protection as they expand into New York,” he starts to explain, sitting back into his own chair, “Walker has been trying to insert himself as a middle man for a while with your father, hence why he tried to start a relationship with you. He thought if he could get in good with daddy’s little girl, Stark would start using him but he didn’t expect you to be so you. His plan failed with you but Pepper convinced Anthony to use him anyways and that’s how he started communications between Namor and Stark Industries. The only problem is that going to the competition was going to piss off the Wakandans and they weren’t supposed to find out until after it was all done. Someone leaked the switch to them and Stark came running to Steve and me. In exchange for Steve’s men, Stark added him to the Talokan deal so Steve could have things made for his men. We were in negotiations about what else he was going to give me but Pepper suggested that a permanent alliance would serve us both better. I wasn’t expecting her to arrange a marriage but there wasn’t enough time to try and figure something else out so I agreed. I figured that I would be able to find something else and that’s what the meeting you interrupted was about. Anthony wouldn’t budge so here we are.”

“Wow so you got fucked over and I got used,” it’s her turn to laugh. 

“I wasn’t fucked over but you definitely were used by that dick head. I would say I came out on top with my end of the deal. I’ve heard stories about you and seen glimpses of that famous Stark attitude so I was ready for the challenge.”

“Ouch. Girls typically don’t like being called challenges,” she feigns hurt, placing a hand over her heart. 

“Would you rather I call you an inconvenience?”

“Jesus no. You really know how to make a girl feel special,” crossing her left leg over her right, she shifts in her seat. 

“I aim for completely fucked out but I’ll take special,” he casually adds, eyes raking over her legs as he pulls out his phone. By now any annoyance had left his body and he tells himself that’s not all because she is close by. Admitting that she is the reason for calming down means one thing and she’s made it very clear that she does not want that.

“I have to go to Washington D.C on business later this week. It should only take a few days so I should be back by Saturday. The wedding planner Nat found wants to meet Monday at 12 to go over the basics.” 

She can’t stop shifting in her seat, thighs rubbing together every time she moves to find a semi-comfortable spot. At this point, she’s barely listening to what he has to say since he so causally mentioned a girl being fucked out is his primary goal in life. Internally her brain is telling her to sit still and get out as fast as she can but other thoughts are flooding her mind from between her legs. 

“Are you alright?” pretend concern laces his voice at her fidgety state.

“What? Oh yeah I’m fine,” she fails to lie and it’s clear he knows she’s lying by the way his lips turn up in that stupid smirk. 

“You sure? Something seems like it’s bothering you,” he pushes, hoping she’ll crack a little more. 

“It’s nothing,” she snaps, “why are you going to Washington?” “So full of ‘why’s today. Might have to teach you how to sit and listen without any questions.”

“I wouldn’t be such a challenge then, would I? You’d lose interest if I didn’t push your buttons.” 

The smirk breaks out in full force, “Maybe I want a good little housewife who obeys and doesn’t question me. I could get used to seeing you, so stubborn and spiteful, kneeling before me with wide eyes.”

His brave words spur something inside of her. If he wants to mess with her, two can play this game and right now she feels like inflicting a bit of her own torture on him. 

“We both know you don’t want that. If you did, we wouldn’t be here and you’d be off fucking some socialite girl who spends all of daddy’s money. You like the challenge. You want someone to put you in your place,” the sight of him licking his lips only pushes her to keep going on. 

“You’re a powerful man, you’re more than capable of getting what you want so there’s no way you just let this all happen. You want me and it’s getting to you that I won’t let you have me. I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to always get your way and now you’re being denied.”

The tension has shifted in the air and if anyone were to step foot into the room, they’d be wise to immediately exit. Both of them are trying to gain dominance and prove that they make the other break. James has reclined back into his chair, legs spread because what else says “I am the boss here” than manspreading? Doll has kept her legs crossed and her hands on her knee to show she isn’t bothered by any of this but really it’s because there’s a deep ache that is starting to crack her façade. 

“Has it occurred to you that I’m letting you act this way? You said it yourself, I get what I want. If I wanted, I would’ve had you that first night.”

“Radial idea: you’re not in control here. I am. I set the pace. I make the rules. I decide what happens. If I want you to beg for me, I’ll have you on your knees with tears in your eyes, begging for me to finally do something. If anything is going to happen, it’ll be on my terms, Bucky. You might be the man and the big boss that everyone fears but I’m the one who calls the shots,” her voice barely wavers no matter how fast her heart is beating against her chest. She’s thanking the gods that she’s not standing because she would’ve fallen right into his lap. 

“Prove it,” the challenge causes another wave of downright filthy thoughts to flood her brain and flush her body. 

“Answer my question first; why are you going to Washington?” “Do you know what I do for work?” his hand comes up to rub his jaw, fingers scraping over the stubble that has grown over the last few weeks. 

He doesn’t wait for her answer, “When people can’t get their hands dirty, they call Steve. Sometimes it’s extracting information or an asset, other times it’s not as nice and that’s where I come in. Since I handle the more sensitive side of things, it attracts some high-profile clients and that often means a business trip to Washington D.C.”

“So you’re a mercenary.”

“Freelance contractor is my official job title.”

“Good to know you’re in bed with the government. At least let me know when you decide to fuck a senator so I can sleep somewhere else.”

His eyebrows raise in surprise but quickly fade back into his smirk, “Already thinking about us sharing a bed?”

“No, I figured you slept in a coffin at night because you’re a soul-sucking vampire who’s only after money.”

His deep laughter fills the room and warms her cheeks among other body parts, “I’d bring in a bed to properly fuck you.”

“Look at who’s already thinking about us sleeping together and bold of you to assume you’d be doing the fucking,” rivaling his crass words is the only option at this point to maintain her dominance. 

“Oh please tell me how you plan on doing that.”

“You’ll have to wait for that. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have paperwork to file since you so rudely demanded I meet you in your office when I first got here,” uncrossing her legs and standing up, she’s praying to god her legs will keep her upright and that the horny bastard between her legs will chill out. 

“Can’t wait, Doll.”

_______________________________________________

“Motherfucker,” whispering to herself as her body refuses to relax after her meeting with James. Two hours later and she’s still staring at the same patient intake form. At this point, she won’t be able to get any work done and her mind can only come up with one way to release that thought. 

“No, no, no, no, nope. Not gonna happen,” she mutters before slamming her computer short and sitting back against her desk chair. 

She looks around the room for a second idea and her eyes land on the book she hasn’t touched since she moved in. Chloe Gong’s ‘These Violent Delights’, a book she had been excited to read, seems a little too on the nose with her current situation. Anthony always teased her about her book choices, claiming that she read too many ‘kid’ stories when she should be reading the classics and educational books. Her mom, on the other hand, had encouraged her to keep reading whatever she wanted and would happily buy whatever she wanted. That was the one thing she missed the most about her mom; the unconditional love and support. Her childhood hadn’t been the easiest, her mom repeatedly getting sober and then relapsing. She couldn’t blame the woman though considering the man Anthony was even if he wasn’t there for the first couple of years. 

Her mom rarely talked about what happened between her and Anthony but it was implied that she got knocked after a one-night stand, tried to run, bad people found her, and her dad didn’t exactly spring into action to help aside from suggesting a terrible name. Her mom had done what she could to make sure Doll was not involved in Anthony’s world at all. She didn’t even know that her dad was Anthony Stark until she was 10 and her mom dragged her to his Manhattan Apartment, begging him to take her. Pepper was the one to answer the door and agree, forming the initial impression that she was going to be an ally to Doll. She had been until she turned 15 and Anthony started paying more attention to her because of her excellent grades. 

“The prodigal daughter has returned,” is what he had told her after vowing to always protect her. Laughable now considering how he gave her up so easily and didn’t bother to return her texts in a timely fashion. 

Speaking of the devil, her phone alerts her to a new text that reads, 

“Walker claims he hasn’t talked to you since the fundraiser. Must be someone else. Have James look into it.” 

Completely destroying her phone is starting to seem like a good idea. Alas, she cannot because she’d have to set up a new phone and the whole process is just not one that she wants to deal with. Her mind is still preoccupied with the life or death decision of to booty call James and suffer his endless teasing or take one cold ass shower and hoping the cold restarts her system. 

The sound of men talking and the car door closing decides for her; cold shower it is. 

_______________________________________________

James had left about two days ago with a wink and an overdramatic ‘Goodbye Doll. Behave’ while Natasha rolled her eyes as they drove away. In their absence, Steve became her surrogate fiancé, either following her or sending other men out with her. On the days when Steve didn’t tail her like a stalker, she felt relief not suffocated but also upset from not having a certain soul-sucking vampire close by even through his friend. 

Today a large blonde with long hair and his lanky black-haired counterpart, Thor and Loki if she remembered correctly, was assigned to her. Neither man has said anything to her or even looked at her so it was more like two shadows hiding in the lobby of her office. They had tried to do a security sweep but she stopped them to remind them that it was the Stark Tower after all and there were men stationed everywhere. 

Leaving the two, she gets her keys out to open her office and instantly feels another presence in the room with her. A part of her is saying to scream out for Thor and Loki but the other part knows who has broken in. As she closes the door, her suspicions are confirmed when she spots John Walker sitting on her therapy couch, lounging like he owns the place. 

“What do you want?” she hisses. 

“For you to answer my messages.”

“Get out,” her fingers itch to grab the gun she normally keeps tucked close to her ribs but she solemnly remembers she decided against it this morning. 

“After you explain something to me,” metal flashes and he’s whipped out his own gun. 

“Sit”, he orders, pointing with the gun to the chair she usually sits at during appointments. 

“Don’t even think about grabbing yours, sweetheart. I’m much faster than you. Now explain to me why you haven’t been answering your phone.”

Silence will only get her so far in this situation but she decides to try her luck anyway. 

“Silent treatment, how mature?” his patience is starting to grow thin.

“I don’t think it was very nice of you to block me either. I had to get a new number and that was really inconvenient for me.”

She only nods her head, mouth in a straight line and jaw clenched. 

“And you know how I don’t like to be inconvenienced.” 

Again she nods. 

“Did your little boyfriend have anything to do with it?” No response. 

Suddenly he is up and over the top of her, forcing her back in the chair, “I was surprised when I heard you were engaged to him. He’s got quite a few years on you, not sure if he can keep up you. Or do you fake it and pretend to enjoy so you don’t hurt his feelings? I’m sure he would love to hear how much of a dirty slut you really are.”

“Oh please. You should be more concerned about the fact I faked it with you to get the fuck out. Your precious little ego can’t handle rejection and now you’re doing everything you can to fix it,” she can’t help but laugh at his failed attempt to scare her. 

“Would you like to try that again?” she can feel the cold metal against her neck. 

“Do you want me to spell it out for you? You’re terrible in bed so, I faked my orgasms so you’d get off and I could leave to find someone who would actually do the job. You are the epitome of toxic masculinity. Drop it and leave me alone. This is the last time I’m going to tell you.”

“Or what?” he shoves the gun into her neck harder, finger tensing on the trigger. She can barely see the revolver cylinder and nearly laughs at the game he wants to play.  

“I haven’t decided yet but I’m sure my fiancé would have some ideas once he sees the barrel marks on my neck,” he pulls the trigger and her eyes squeeze at the sound of it clicking to the next chamber. 

“Say stupid shit again and I can’t promise that the next chamber will be empty.”

Never one to follow instructions, she spits in his face. He flinches, dragging a hand over his face with a menacing look in his eye. He squeezes the trigger again and it clicks again. 

“You’ve only have 4 more tries, think about your next move carefully.”

“Your dick is small.”

“3 more. Do you really want to keep going?”

Shrugging her shoulders the best she can, “I don’t think you have it in you to shoot me.”

This time he pulls the trigger twice, both times clicking to show that her sixth chance will have been her final one. 

“Start answering my messages and I won’t have to come and visit you at work, sweetheart,” he stands and leaves the office without another word. The alarmed voices of the men outside invade her office and in seconds Thor and Loki come barging in. Thor is the one to check her over for any injuries while Loki speaks in a hushed voice on the phone, more than likely calling Steve. 

Loki motions to Thor to join him on the other side of the room, leaving her alone with her thoughts and an aching neck. The shock starts to sit in and her body betrays her, going cold and trembling. She can’t hear whatever the men are saying but she can only assume that Steve will be there in moments and will no doubt be furious. 

What feels like seconds later, Steve is storming through the door, barking orders, and crouching down to her eye level. 

“Hey, we’ve got to get you out of here and somewhere safe. Let’s go,” he grabs her hand, pulling her out of the chair to usher her out of the office. She allows him to tuck her into his side, wrapping a protective arm around her shoulders as he leads her through the building. The entirety of Stark Tower has gone into full alert mode, all personnel are on the hunt for John. They pass by everyone without a word and exit the building of chaos behind them. In the haze of shock, she barely registers that Steve has gotten her inside the SUV or that he’s been on the phone, trying to calm down whoever is on the other line. 

The last thing she remembers is the surprised look on Steve’s face as she slumps forward and faints.

[cult-of-the-eye]

inspired by @archivus' statements, i decided to give it a try myself

tw for depersonalisation, body image issues, body horror, slight gore

Out of Body Experience

Statement of Rebekah Fitch, regarding something that wasn’t her body. Original statement given 5th March 2018. Recording by [REDACTED], Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, Manchester. Committed to tape 26th March 2024. 

Statement begins. 

I never thought I would end up like this. I just-

I guess I should start from the start. 

Throughout my life, I’ve had a complicated relationship with my body. Not to get too, um, personal or anything, but let’s just say it's tough being the child of an immigrant mother, especially, well, my mother. She would make comments about my body, small ones, I’ll admit, but ones that certainly built up to…recent events. On top of all that, I spent a lot of my teen years dissociating. Tricking my brain into believing that I wasn’t real. That nothing was. It’s a bit difficult to solidify an image of your body when half of you is ashamed of it and the other half doesn’t even consider your ownership of one. Ownership. I guess that’s sort of where it all began. 

It was sometime in January when it all started to go wrong. I don’t exactly have a habit of staring at myself in the mirror, in fact, the only mirror I own in my cramped little flat is the bathroom one. It’s somehow always stained, a fact which I hesitate to admit helped me live with my…issues. The point is, the majority of the time, I didn’t know how I looked.

And then one day, I watched myself wake up. 

I remember exactly how it felt. You know how people sometimes slice oranges in half and then take the peel, dig their fingers into the sides and push, letting each segment split from the other, hungrily leaning up towards you? That’s how I felt. Inverted. Wrong. I saw myself in a way that I had never, ever seen before. Each and every part of me that bulged where it shouldn’t have, thinned and yellowed at the edges like a fruit in its off-season. Whatever was happening to my eyes didn’t hurt, exactly, but I could feel every single part of my body as if it had suddenly awoken from a deep unconsciousness. It disgusted me. The life of it all. I panicked, of course, I thought I was having a really, really bad dream and that all I needed to do was wake up. But, no matter how many times I attempted to shield myself from the view, no matter how many times I willed every single synapse in my brain to connect and let my goddamn eyes close, nothing happened. 

That nothing was the most excruciating nothing that I had ever experienced in my life. I was forced open, boneless and writhing. The me on the bed that I was watching slept soundly. 

I don’t remember when I snapped out of it. I don’t remember how long it had been. I sat up, drenched in sweat, determined to be rid of the one mirror I had left. Putting it in the bin didn’t feel as triumphant as I believed it would. I guess part of me knew that this was no one-off. 

Ok, I know what you’re thinking. It could just be a hallucination. I could be traumatised or mentally ill or on drugs. Well, I’m actually all of those things, which means that I have the unique ability to prove you wrong. I know what a hallucination feels like, I know what drug side effects feel like, and I know what my episodes feel like. And this? This was entirely separate. I don’t have to tell you that it happened again. I don’t have to tell you that I went from GP to GP, therapist to therapist to find out what was happening to me. But I will end this with proof. 

Statement Ends. 

Post-statement records include a medical report of one Rebekah Fitch. It outlines a series of scars of unidentified means on the underside of her eyelids, spelling out the phrase “I know that I exist.” Any attempts to follow up have led to dead ends. However, I’m afraid that I may be able to guess how this one ends.

[scarletnwidow]

Destroyed

Part 5

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!reader, Natasha Romanoff x Fem!reader

Warnings: cussing, cringe moments, possible too much information lol

A/N: HOOOLY SHIIII- I can't believe it took me two years to update this HAHAHAHHA anybody still with me? jk I have no idea how this will end now, I just keep on writing whatever comes to mind haha so bear with me a little more? :")

Summary: You always thought that the best way to get revenge is to let them see you’re happy. You also thought that the best way to move on is to convince yourself that you’re okay until you no longer need any more convincing. You’re about to find out how effective it was.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

You’ve never felt the need to be angry at something for the pain of your family’s death, because you only had yourself. 

What happens now that you finally have someone else to blame? 

*****

“...an ancient hero in the flesh.” 

The moment Wanda said those words aloud, the more it sounds surreal. There was a stunned silence after, broken only by an incredulous laugh by a god himself. 

“I-I’m sorry, I’m not the only one who thinks this is absurd, right?” Thor couldn’t keep himself from snorting, everything sounds stupid and impossible.

When everyone just stared at him, his smile faded and his jaw clenched, “That is impossible! Mortals carrying the blood of the gods are a myth.” 

“We thought the same thing about you, Thor: God of Thunder, War, and Fertility. But look where we are,” Tony said sarcastically, “who’s to say the idiotic, egotistical greek gods don’t exist like you? Or every other textbook mythology there is, on that matter,” he continued. 

“I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t be calling them idiotic in case...you know,” Bruce mumbled. 

“Well, you have a fellow Avenger as proof. And now I think I’ve finally removed impossible from my vocabulary,” Fury responded. 

Wanda wasted no time in stepping up in front of him, “How do you know all this anyway? Y/N’s powers are quite similar to mine, how do you know this is that?” She questioned, pointing at the folder resting on Natasha’s hands. 

“And why didn’t we know about all these experiments in the first place? Where did you get these files? This weren’t on the place we raided,” the redhead finally allowed herself to speak. Her brain is currently trying to make sense with too much information all at once, she didn’t even know where to start. 

“You of all people should know that in a mission, there will always be another mission to finish, Romanoff,” Fury spatted. Of course, Natasha is well aware. She was always the one given a different mission by Fury during missions. 

“We know from the start about their goal, but since obviously, it all sounds beyond-the-universe-ridiculous, we thought it was just another plot of Hydra. But then SHIELD caught wind of another location thousands of miles from our initial lead. The tip says it’s where they perfected their process, and they were currently proceeding with the first subject just as you guys were headed to the other place,” he continued. 

“One thing we know for sure, Y/N’s in a vulnerable state right now. Emotions are very tricky, especially hers. It also doesn’t help that it’s what triggered her abilities,” Maria chimed in. 

The redhead looked back at the folder in her hands; she really couldn’t wrap her mind around all this. Just an hour ago you were in her arms, nothing about you or your features seem any different, so how? 

She internally slapped herself for letting you go. This was a lot to process for them, and they were just your friends, your family; what more if you would find this out about yourself? 

The redhead absentmindedly turned to the next page, the wheels of her brain still whirring on her head. Her eyes accidentally landed on the photos in front of her, and she wished she should’ve just closed it. 

Her eyes widened and she felt a lump form in her throat, her gaze darting to the short description above the photos. 

Eris Labs Main Facility: Subject Threats Successfully Eliminated, All Research Data Collected

In front her were photos of a freshly destroyed two-story building, or at least what was left of it. 

“W-We did this?” she looked up at Fury, her voice hoarse. Fury frowned at her before glancing down at what she was pertaining to, he sighed and gave her a single nod. 

Natasha didn’t know whether or not she should be relieved she weren’t able to convince you more to come back with her. But, she knew she shouldn’t have left you alone. 

****

You didn’t know how much longer you stayed seated at the ground. You just spent the rest of the afternoon staring at the oblivion after Natasha reluctantly left you behind. When you finally came to your senses, you knew the sun will set in about an hour or so. 

You’ve spent too much time debating whether or not you should explore the wreckage that you just totally zoned-out in your spot. You took a deep breath before walking up to the site. 

You didn’t deny to yourself that you’re nervous; you haven’t been here for six years. You never even bothered to sit and remember what exactly happened. You didn’t think there was a point, exploring the place where you almost got killed wouldn’t bring your family back. Besides, you knew the Avengers took care of everything, so there wouldn’t be anything left for you to delve in. 

You still think there was no point in finding out what this place was, after all, it was completely trashed so you were sure you wouldn’t find anything. 

The universe decided to prove you wrong once again. 

You found yourself walking towards the space where you found your sister bleeding to her death. The memory of how you caught her eyes while you were still under some rubbles flowed through your mind as you stared at the empty space. There were still some traces of dried blood even after all these years, and you felt like your ribs are squeezing your heart. 

A strangled sob came out from your lips as you forced yourself to look away. You thought you’ve already moved on; it’s been six years! Turns out, you didn’t spend those years moving on; you spent all those years convincing yourself that you’ve moved on. 

After all, you remember that day was busy with people fumbling around, and finding out you’re the sole survivor hits a lot than you could admit. 

You tried to calm yourself, remembering the breathing exercise you invented the first few months of being the last person carrying your family’s name. When the tight in your chest subsides, you look around once more before walking deeper around the fallen debris. 

You immediately looked away when you caught sight of a familiar boulder at the corner of the room. You managed to steady your breath, but your tears kept flowing freely even when you wipe your cheeks. When you found your courage to approach, you only noticed that the boulder had been moved. 

You frowned, that’s when you only realize that you didn’t know where the bodies of your family were, of everyone’s actually. How did you not worry about your family’s bodies all those years ago? How did you not think of giving them a proper burial? Where were they now? The realization only made you feel worse.

You snapped out of your self-disgust party when you noticed something that’s out-of-place. Something that definitely wasn’t supposed be there. 

*****

“She can’t know about all this,” Natasha said as she abruptly closed the folder with trembling hands and gripped it tight, as if the entire thing would destroy the world if opened once again. 

Everyone in the room stared at her. She looked at each of them incredulously as if she’s the only one who sees the severity of the situation. 

“I-I know this place. This…this is where she came from. This is where I just came from! Where her parents died; where she watched her sister bled to death. If she found out SHIELD was the one who destroyed the place—the reason they were gone,” her voice cracked as she took another shaky breath. 

The team shifted in their seats. The air heavy with uncertainty and uneasiness about the whole ordeal. The fact about your existence is already confusing enough, the thing about SHIELD having a part with you becoming an orphan adds to the mix of emotions. 

They know now that emotions are a vital factor in your powers, and it’s starting to dawn on the team that you aren’t probably ready to know the truth yet. 

It hurts Natasha to think that she has to keep something from you. You’ve suffered enough from not knowing the truth, thanks to your relationship with Wanda.

After a few more minutes of tense silence, Tony let out a humorless laugh. He gestured to the folder clutched in Natasha’s hand like he can’t believe something like that exists.

“H-How…how is even all this possible? What the hell is Eris working on? What the hell is Y/N?” 

If looks could kill, Tony earned two equally lethal glares from a redhead and a brunette. Natasha was about to retort when Wanda was suddenly at Tony’s side clutching his shoulder. 

“Do not talk about her like that,” Wanda said, with her other hand raised up in the air threateningly. 

This startled everyone, Steve rushed to Wanda’s side and gently held her back. Tony sighed and lifted his arms in defeat. “I’m sorry, but I know all of us wants to know how we happen to have a friend who descended from Greek gods,” he said as he looked at Fury and Maria, his gaze expectant. 

“So are the Avengers currently looking at our very own Wonder Woman?” Tony added which made everyone give out an amused snort, lessening the tension in the air and made everybody turned to look at the two in front as well. 

Maria rolled her eyes but she allowed herself an amused smirk. “No, Tony, she is not like Diana Prince,” she proceeded as she looked at Natasha and gestured to the folder. “May I?” Maria opened the folder and took a few moments shifting through the pages before letting out a satisfied hum as she finds what she’s looking for. 

She glanced at Fury to her side, silently asking for permission. He gave her a nod before taking a seat for himself. 

She took a deep breath before speaking. “Y/N isn’t descended from the gods. She has the blood of Helen herself,” Maria paused. Seeing that the team just stared at her dumbfounded, she continued, “Of course, she’s not an actual descendant but that’s exactly what Eris was working on. Extracting biological components from ancient ruins and battlegrounds hoping to bioengineer Helen’s blood and create a haptandra— the hand of war. It’s—“

“I’m sorry, wait, hold up,” Bruce said, raising his arm while looking around at his teammates then back to Maria. “When you say Helen, you don’t mean Helen of Troy, is it?” This made him earn a small smile from Maria. 

“Yes, I meant Helen of Troy.” The team made another round of uneasy shifting in their seats and some grumbling of how this all sounds stupid. 

“I suggest you let her finish first before you all decide how crazy this is. Because it gets even crazier.” Fury stated a little louder to get everyone’s attention. It did, and they all turn back to Maria. 

“You all know Helen’s story, right? How a 10-year war raged on because of her? Apparently, that’s due to her bloodline. Something about being sired by Nemesis so wherever she goes, there will be strife of some kind,” A hand was raised in the air before Maria can continue, “But the Trojan War was caused by Helen’s beauty is it not?” the interruption earned a couple of bewildered looks aimed at the owner, due to him being a machine. 

Vision noticed this and if toasters could blush, he definitely does. “Human mythology fascinates me,” he mumbles as he puts his hand down.  

“Some books and interpretations of the story whatnots believed it was because of her beauty,” Maria said, offering him a smile. “Eris, however, discovered ancient texts that state it was never her beauty that caused the war. It was solely her very own blood that caused it; that wherever she goes, war is destined to come. And that… power… continued on to her descendants. The texts that Eris found said it was not confirmed that the power coursed through every woman descended from her, but every major war since her time was linked to her descendants.” 

“Okay, so Helen of Troy, pretty much every mythology book wrong, cursed bloodline, powers due to that cursed blood, and said blood was currently running through Y/N’s veins right now. Yeah, got it.” Tony sarcastically said which made the entire team shift in frustration. 

Too much information going on and it all just sounds fucking crazy. 

Maria just sighed and crossed her arms. “I know, all of this sounds like bullshit. That’s why we never took it seriously when we found these files. We didn’t even know someone survived,” 

“Please tell me this is all the crazy we’ll get today,” Clint said, staring at the opened folder on the table. 

“I’m afraid not,” Fury stood, moving to stand beside Maria. He paused to look at each Avenger in front of him, “Y/N’s abilities are complex and bioengineered, making them both  powerful and can be quite unstable,” he gestured to the folder, “this thing only explains the basics of her powers. And they’re already disturbing as it is. Now, when we’re done, and we face her again, I suggest you to be ready about shitting in your own pants.” 

*****

Three days later.

You never thought you could be any more nervous than you are right now. You've always been a big believer in not going headstrong into something that you have no idea what's in store for you. That was the main reason why you always do your homework before completing a job back when you were still an assassin.

Yet, here you are. Just about to turn off the engine of your boat in the middle of fucking nowhere. You have no idea if you're in the right place, but this is also the most sure you've been at anything.

You almost reached on your pocket for Natasha's widow bites, wanting to reach out to her for help because you have no idea what you're doing. Natasha's been trying to contact you nonstop in the last two days, so is the rest of the team. You even frowned on your phone for a good 5 minutes when you got Wanda's text, wanting you to come back to the compound.

You sighed and took a deep breath. When you turned off the engine, you did your best to scour the ocean around you for anything. Squinting your eyes for anything that might point you to the right place. You just knew you needed to be there, and that you must do this on your own.

*****

Natasha is still trying any means possible to track you down. She and the team had gone to where she left you hoping to find you still there. Probably to also make sense of what happened to you. Of course when they got there, you were long gone. No traces of where you could possibly be. The redhead almost cursed you for figuring out that her widow bites have trackers on them. But of course, from one master assassin to another, she wasn't surprised at all.

Wanda is going out of her mind with worry. Even Vision can't help ease the worry and panic she feels when thinking about where you could be. She can't help but feel guilty because this is technically her fault. She hurt you, yes, but she only did what will make her happy. Who knows that in doing so, she'll be triggering ancient powers inside you? Wanda cannot explain what she was feeling. She still care about you but feels like she has no right because of what she did to you.

Now, Wanda is at your room with Natasha watching her closely. The brunette is trying to use the traces of magic she felt at the Eris Facility to try and find you. When she proposed that idea, of course Natasha was the first one volunteer- no, demanded to go with her. The redhead was still pissed, she hated the idea that Wanda is the closest person they have to finding you. If it were up to her, she wants Wanda as far away from you as possible. But, finding you was more important, so she's willing to put up with her for now. Natasha makes an internal promise that she'll fight the shit out of Wanda after this whole fiasco.

No way she's gonna let you get hurt over Wanda again.

The brunette is starting to feel her head hurt. She wants to find you so bad but she feels a little reluctance when she tries to reach out to the feeling of your powers. She didn't know why, but she still feels the same fear she felt when your powers hit them for the first time during the meeting. Wanda's eyes are now furrowed shut as she tries to reach that power again.

Wanda thinks she must've been grunting with effort because she can hear the faint sounds of Natasha's voice asking what is happening. The brunette sees an elaborate purple mist on her mind, This is it. Y/N is close. She wills her power to reach that power, the same way your power reached out to hers when she first felt it. Unfortunately for her, she feels a reluctance, and it was coming from you. Your power seems to be preventing her from reaching you and finding where you are.

Wanda feels the purple mist is seeming to push her away, it takes great effort from her to try and push through. In her mind, Wanda feels the purple mist started to surround her, and it's closing in. She feels her power flicker, letting her know you were trying to suffocate her. Wanda focused on her desire to find you and make things right as she screams and willed her power to go forward. Until she felt a release in pressure and everything goes black.

*****

Natasha can hear the footsteps of the team rushing to your room. Steve was the first to enter but stopped short at the sight of unconscious Wanda in her arms.

"What happened?!" Steve exclaimed as he tentatively approached. The rest of the team poured in the room with worry on their faces. All of them catching a glimpse of Wanda's power in the room before it completely dissipated.

"S-She just started grunting and screamed. Then there was a burst of her power before she passed out." Natasha said, still clutching Wanda.

"So, did you think she found Y/N?" Fury said as he enters the room.

It was when Wanda moaned and started to stir. Natasha carefully helped her sit up with Steve rubbing her back. "Hey, are you okay? What was that? What happened?" Natasha asked. The brunetter slowly opened her eyes and gave her a weak smile.

"I found her."

*****

It's been nearly four hours of staring into the ocean. You were getting pissed and frustrated with yourself for going here without a plan. You just straight up believed what you found and went to it without question. You sighed, you were desperate for answers and you really couldn't blame yourself for that.

You got up and finally decided to just go back to civilization when you felt a tug in your stomach. You looked down at your hands and see the same purple energy dancing on your fingertips. Only it was stronger and you can feel it more clearly. It was getting more and more intense as you stare at it, you can even hear buzzing around you. Then suddenly, the pressure just dropped and it stopped, but not before bursting a huge amount of purple energy around you.

You closed your eyes. When you opened them again, you felt your jaw dropped to the goddamn floor. A barrier of mist seemed to unfold before your eyes, slowly revealing a gorgeous island like you've never seen before. It has the whitest sand you've ever seen, different species of huge trees that some of them you don't even recognize, plants and flowers in full bloom, and you can even make out the intricate houses in the distance just above the huge island.

This is the most beautiful place you've ever seen, it almost feels magical. But again, maybe it is because 30 seconds ago you were still surrounded by endless ocean. Now, an island is in front of you. You blink a few times, trying to comprehend if what you're seeing is real. When it did not disappear again, your attention was finally caught by a single person standing on the beach. A woman. She is looking at you with a smile you can't place as either a friendly one or a wicked one.

She's wearing a weird but very cool armor that you only see in movies and textbooks. A beautiful bow on her back, and a sword at her side. You stared at her in amazement, there's something about her that's quite familiar to you but you can't figure out what. Your thoughts are interrupted whe she spoke, "I see you finally found my letter. Welcome, Y/N. I've been waiting for you for a long time."

A small envelope sits at the center of where your parents’ bodies should be. You know because of the dried blood scattered on the floor, and it’s directly aligned at the center of the huge boulder. 

Your heart is beating fast as you picked up the small envelope. Its dirty and slight yellowish state lets you know it’s been there for a long time. You stared a little too long at the envelope in your hands, having absolutely no idea what’s inside. You guessed that a card with a message is inside because something tells you you’re supposed to find it a long time ago. 

With shaky hands, you pull out the card inside that proved you right. You noted the worn-out ink of an elegant handwriting. 

43.4130° N, 34.2993° E — find me when you’re ready, Warbringer. 

A/N: For those of you who knows my reference for "Warbringer", kindly let me know in the comments cuz I've been looking for my people to fangirl about it hahahhahahaah

[yuseirra]

I ALREADY MADE AN ANALYSIS THAT THERE'S SOMETHING TAUNTING KAMIKI TO BECOME INSANE BACK ON JULY 11TH!!!!JULY 11TH!!!! AFTER FATAL WAS OUT!!! MEPHISTO IS HIS SONG!!!!!

oH GOD... I should have.. I should have posted that here too but it's one of the posts that didn't make it, why didn't I????? Let me bring a rough machine translated version of it okay. I have proof. I wrote it back so long ago!!!! Not long after I listened to Fatal!!!!!! UGH!!!UGH!!! I ALREADY PREDICTED THIS!!!! I

oH GOOdness. I'm going to get so many things right about this comic. I am not joking. THIS is how it's going to be. I.. I can't explain things any other way. I just. I just can't, if this isn't it, it's beyond my abilities to make sense of this character. but I'm really good with these. I feel I will be right.

***

I was listening to Mephisto and I really got a sense of it. This whole song is from Kamiki’s perspective, isn’t it? I was right that this boy (34 years old) offered something huge for Ai, wasn’t I? There’s a line like, "Since I gave you my life, you granted me time." People probably thought that was about Aqua, but I don’t think so.

As I mentioned before, here’s my theory: this guy practically has no will to live. After learning that Ai had died, there was probably nothing left in his life to be happy about or look forward to. I still need to dig deeper to understand exactly how much he directly contributed to that, but judging by his character, he didn’t seem like the type to do something extreme to others—at least not before he parted ways with Ai. Even if he wasn’t directly responsible for Ai’s death like Nino was, he probably did something that he’s been suffering immense guilt over, thinking, "I shouldn’t have done that." (If Kamiki really did give Ryosuke the address on purpose, then he’s seriously lost his mind… but from what I can tell, it seems like he was drunk. How on earth did those two meet anyway? ;) In any case, while others might think, "Well, it’s hard to say he’s the reason Ai died," Kamiki might believe he is. He may have even tried to kill himself after Ai’s death.

This character’s nature isn’t inherently that aggressive. When the people who tormented him died, he was overcome with guilt and emotional burden. He’s someone who gets hurt easily and is quite sensitive. (Even Ai leaving was probably because she thought he couldn’t bear the thought of having to take responsibility for their children on top of everything else. But I think...he would have been okay as long as he had her with him.) He struggled with the deaths of the people who wronged him, so when Ai died, he likely broke down even more, spiraling to the point where he was on the brink of death.

But perhaps at that point, he couldn’t die, and some godlike figure appeared before him offering a deal. He might not be able to die until he completes that deal. And since he has no attachment to life, it doesn’t matter what happens to him in the process. Out of desperation to undo the mistakes he believes he made, he might be willing to do things he normally wouldn’t. In Chapter 154, the surprised expression he had was because he never considered the idea that Ai might have worried about him. He thought she would live happily without a care for what happened to him. He had no doubt that everything would be fine as long as he did his part, but when he realized that wasn’t true, he was shocked.

The whole idea of a deal with a god is just speculation, as that’s not explicitly laid out in the story, but Tsukuyomi did appear. This is a world where gods can manifest physically. Besides that, I can’t think of any other motivation that would keep him going. Back when I analyzed Aqua and considered Mephisto to be his feelings, I mentioned something similar.

The speaker in Mephisto is in a mental state where "it wouldn’t be strange if they died at any moment." That intense feeling hit me while listening to the song, and it was heartbreaking.

Also, some of the lyrics are as follows:

"Tears and sweat filled to the brim are traces of blood" (If it’s Aqua, why does it mention "blood" here?)

"There’s never a day of relief"

"Every day, sad lights gather"

(What does it mean for "lights" to gather? Could it be related to people with star eyes?)

"Born of the abyss"

This fits Kamiki more than Aqua, especially the line, "You’re empty, so there’s no way you could receive love."

The mention of a "last chance" suggests that there isn’t much time or opportunity left, but Aqua has never really shown a sense of urgency about completing his revenge. Kamiki, on the other hand, likely views it as a race against time because he has something to accomplish.

Kamiki is someone who has been swayed and hurt a lot in life, and the only thing he truly loved and wanted was Ai. If he’s going to take action, it’s only for Ai. He has no lingering attachments to life. I think this theory is correct. It has to be. Otherwise, how do these songs even make sense?

What’s really funny is that every time I dive into a genre, I always end up picking the character who sacrifices themselves. There’s always a couple where one sacrifices for the other, but I never got that vibe from Aqua and Kana.

But if things unfold this way, it’s just too familiar, and that’s what’s funny. It’s like, "How does this always happen wherever I go?" So if I’m right, it’s hilarious. I listen to a lot of music, and in genres where the songs are well made, I tend to analyze them based on the lyrics. And when it comes to my favorite songs, I feel like they capture the essence of the story or the emotions so accurately, so it leaves an impression on me.

These songs are spoilers. I’m hesitant to speak too confidently because this excitement might fade later, but whenever I listen to the songs, I feel sure of my conclusions.

GUYS!!! LISTEN!!! I GOT SO MANY THINGS RIGHT ABOUT THIS COMIC I EVEN LOST TRACK.... I THINK THIS IS IT. I JUST CAN'T EXPLAIN THIS CHARACTER'S ACTIONS OTHERWISE. HELP

[fierceawakening]

So… what IS “liberal feminism” anyway?

Those of you who know me know that I believe the basic things I think feminists believe. Society has a history of patriarchy, of men being seen as rulers and statesmen, and this filters down so deep that men are described as little kings of their homes. Women are assumed to be supporters and nurturers, helping behind the scenes and raising kids. None of this is evil as an individual choice, but when it’s blown up and dictated as the rules of society, it hurts both the people who don’t want to or can’t follow the rules (and many if not most people can’t now that economies assume 2 income households) and also those who do follow them, by hiding other options from them and not letting them bend the rules if they find they need to (see the bit about economies assuming 2 person households.)

Im no longer active in explicitly feminist groups, because I had bad experiences in groups that became high control, to the point where I found an intimate partner in one of the groups, and she turned out to be verbally abusive (and did things that put me at physical risk too, which I think were her testing the waters. I think if I’d stayed another month, i would have been hit.)

So I hang out on the edges—yeah, I agree mostly but I’ve been burned so I’ll be over there. Come get me if you need more people, I got you. I just need to lurk close to the exit, it’s nothing personal.

But there’s one thing I keep seeing, including recently, that I never could figure out: the idea of a “liberal feminist.”

I know HOW the term is used. It’s an insult, mostly. A way to say that someone cares on the surface about feminism but won’t REALLY have your back if you need them. But WHAT it means, I don’t know.

If you ask the people doing the insulting, it means someone who only cares about women’s rights under the law. Someone who very much wants hiring discrimination to stay illegal but gets squishy as soon as someone wants to leave an abuser because “personal choice” isn’t and shouldn’t be covered under the law.

Back in My Day, “liberal feminism” was contrasted with “radical feminism.” Liberal feminism was described as the movement of activists trying to write, pass, and enact laws ensuring equal rights.

They were, however, namby pamby. “Radical” people “got to the root” of the problem. What “the root” was, much ink was spilled in an effort to define, but no one that I remember actually ever hit on a working definition that made clear who needed to do what or how we knew we finished doing it.

This I think is another bit of proof the groups were high control. It’s very common for high control groups to have a core slogan that’s very vague, precisely so that they can spend most of their time infighting about what it means and purging subgroup a whole thinks it means this in favor of subgroup b who thinks it means that.

It’s also how i personally think “radical feminism” went from “many groups are trans exclusive, but it’s not inevitable” to basically synonymous with trans exclusion.

The people who saw trans people as invaders had a clear task: expel them! They paired this with a clear measurable goal: how many are gone? Is that rate fast enough?

In contrast, the people who saw “the root” as something more nebulous, while better people, had no similarly clear conflicting vision for what it meant and what to do, so they were eventually pushed out.

All this as long preamble to say: I think we had it wrong when we condemned others as “liberal,” and I think the degree to which we had it wrong is coming home to roost now that we have a fascist government.

The people the fash are targeting are not just people who have a vague, scary notion of “the root.” They are targeting women’s legal rights. Directly and obviously. They’re literally saying men should proxy vote for their families.

Why is this happening?

Because legal rights and legal battles are not, as many groups describe, a funny little cherry on top of fighting oppression, where you get a little prize but there’s a kraken lurking under there.

The legal rights and legal battles are HOW you fight the kraken under there. They’re armor and weapons.

To put it in rpg terms: Each legal fight you win upgrades your gear.

OF COURSE the enemy is going to target your legal status. You can’t effectively fight a level 999 end boss with Tattered Leather Breastplate and a Notched Shortsword, and your enemies know it.

[ladylynse]

Part 3 of this untitled Doctor Who fic post Waters of Mars where 10 meets up with Grace Holloway again. (Well, I say untitled, and then I realized that when I posted the first bit to tumblr, I used the working title Saving Grace when linking it in this post, so let's go with that for now, shall we? It's better than my document title.) Posted for @gentildonna.

(Previous)

The Doctor made sure he was disconnected from all the machines before he set to work starting up his second heart. It wasn’t easy, not by himself. He would’ve liked to have someone else to help him. But he doubted the hospital staff would give him a good walloping on the back without what they deemed to be good reason, even if he specifically requested it. Not that he would, of course, because that would require explaining himself.

And when explaining himself didn’t work, he tended to run.

That would be slightly harder to do, given the conditions his clothes were in.

He’d started mending them, just a bit, so that he could get by. He could do a bit with the sonic screwdriver, mending fibres here and resonating dried blood off there. He was a bit surprised that, considering he had all manner of things in his pockets, he didn’t have a needle and thread. He made a mental note to put some in there in case anything like this ever happened again.

Though, if and when it did, he probably wouldn’t be wearing this suit anymore. Or this jacket.

Still. He’d worked quickly. Enough so that he’d finished before his scheduled appointment with the good Dr. Holloway. He doubted she’d be particularly disappointed, what with how she felt about him now.

He wished she hadn’t thought he was teasing her, poking fun at her stories. That hadn’t been his intention at all. He should have just come out and said it, but he hadn’t. He had such a gob on him in this regeneration, but did he open his mouth when he should? Of course not.

And now he’d missed his opportunity.

It was just as well. He shouldn’t have come. He managed to ruin them all, somehow, one way or another. This was simply proof that he was making more mistakes, not trying to compensate for his last one. How could he, when he ruined everything—everyone—he’d touched?

No shoes, but at least he was dressed in his suit again. Not that it fit quite as well as it ought to. Bit lumpy. He wasn’t the greatest at stitching. Never had liked all that domestic stuff. But it would do.

It wasn’t as conspicuous as a certain coat he’d worn in the past, one that would put the biblical Joseph’s to shame.

He’d get by.

Though he would like to find his trainers first.

Shouldn’t be too hard.

And then he could slip away to the TARDIS, no worse for the wear, and leave before he ruined Grace’s life any more than he already had.

-|-

The TARDIS refused to let him in.

Even when he claimed it would just be to get a change of clothes.

But she knew better, and he hadn’t been able to win an argument with her yet.

So he went back.

Not back to his hospital bed, no. No, he could do without that. He’d be fine. He’d only lost a bit of blood. Nothing serious. No broken bones, nothing lodged in his body, both hearts fully functioning, memory intact—not much more he could ask for.

He waited outside instead. It was, he thought, perhaps 2004, 2005. Grace may still be in San Francisco, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t moved. And, really, last time he’d been at her place, she hadn’t even had a couch, so she’d either have needed to buy quite a lot of furniture or move to a smaller place. And her place had been a bit of a hike from the hospital, if he remembered correctly. Not normally something that would bother him, but he was, perhaps just a little bit, under the weather.

The Doctor winced as he tried straightening up. Not quite healed up yet. Shouldn’t’ve tried running, really. That probably hadn’t helped. But he was sore enough that he figured pacing probably wasn’t the best way to pass the time, so he found a bench and sat down, waiting.

He was very quickly reminded why he rarely sat down with only his thoughts for company.

Ignoring the pain and his fatigue, he started walking, slowly, around and around and around the hospital grounds.

When he noticed someone watching him, he stopped that and sat down again.

But the itch to be moving remained, gnawing at him.

He wondered why he was doing this.

It wasn’t like he had a lot of time left, as far as he could tell.

His song was ending.

And here he was, waiting, doing nothing except thinking, rehashing everything he’d thought before, when there were worlds to see and places to explore and people to meet and—

Lives to ruin.

That kept him in place, that single thought.

The Doctor waited, deciding what to say the next time he saw Grace.

Because as far as he could tell, he’d only have one shot to get it right. And if he didn’t—if he started off on the wrong foot again—well, then, he wouldn’t get what he needed out of it. Not that he was entirely sure what he would get, or did need, precisely. Not closure. Not peace of mind. More…understanding. So that he would know for the future. So that, perhaps, once he regenerated—if the circumstances were such that he could regenerate—he might be able to see it, in the future. And if he could see it, he could avoid it.

And then he’d never, ever—ever—make that mistake again.

The fact that he’d done it once still scared him.

Almost as much as what would have happened, had someone else not taken it upon herself to correct it, even knowing what that correction would cost.

-|-

Dr. Grace Holloway was not happy to learn that their patient, the self-proclaimed Dr. John Smith, had somehow managed to escape the hospital and that not a single security camera had seen him leave. She hadn’t been particularly pleased with him, pulling the stunt that he had, but he wasn’t in good health, and if he really was a doctor—something she was strongly doubting—then he ought to at least acknowledge the foolishness of his actions. It was something too few people did, thinking they’d just pull through something on their own when they needed some sort of medical care.

Then again, if she were in another country without a passport or so much as a cent to her name, she might have run off, too.

Still, that didn’t explain why he’d singled her out, nor why he’d tried pulling that cruel joke. There was no reason for it. She’d learned, very quickly, to make the entire thing out as a story. And she’d told it, time and again, when she visited the children’s ward. She told other stories, too, but somehow, she always went back to that particular one.

Perhaps because that particular one wasn’t just any story—or just a story at all.

But the amount of detail she’d put into her retellings of it had some people questioning her. Perhaps because the details never changed, as the details of invented stories tended to do. She’d been shocked by the first remark she’d gotten, and even by all the ones that followed, despite knowing better by then. Not that anyone ever meant anything by it, really, as far as she could tell. They were only joking about it—with her, in their eyes. But the comments still stung.

To have snippets of the story repeated back to her, in a manner that hid the joke a little bit too well…. It felt cruel. Uncalled for. And it wasn’t even April Fool’s Day.

Perhaps it wouldn’t bother her so much if she hadn’t spent so much time thinking about it. Wondering, for the most part, what she had missed out on. Whether she’d made the right choice. Whether she’d change her mind, given the chance to. Whether it really had all been just a story or a dream.

The hospital records of that particular John Doe had been destroyed. Explaining away a dead man walking was a bit more difficult than simply burning a couple of x-rays and covering up the death in the first place, but it could be done. Rationalized. It had been late. The orderly had been confused, half-asleep, mixing up reality with that blasted movie he’d been watching. The door hadn’t been closed properly and had been loose on its hinges. It had been battered during normal use but had functioned well enough to not be reported, but its evident failure of function had ultimately required its immediate replacement, holiday or no holiday.

And things had simply fallen into place, logically, rationally, and everything that hadn’t fit had been shoved under the rug and had become unmentionable.

She’d even tried to find Chang Lee, once, when it was all said and done. She hadn’t been successful. She suspected it was because of the two bulging bags he’d held the last time she’d seen him. She still didn’t know what had been in them, but she knew they were from the Doctor. And that…that meant that they could have held anything within them from trinkets to cash to something as outrageous as gold dust.

Grace laughed, a bit bitterly. Oh, look at her now. Pining away after a forgotten possibility. All because some skinny idiot who had no idea what he was doing, how much he was hurting her, was dredging up her memories and shoving them in her face. Someone would have had to put him up to it, she was sure. They’d gone to a lot of trouble, telling someone all her stories. Perhaps he was a friend or relative of someone, thinking he’d have a go at her and have a laugh at her expense.

Although the wounds had been all too real. And the heart trouble wouldn’t have been faked, either. She wondered if they still had those x-rays. She’d be able to tell if his heart was overworked, as he’d kept insisting, by its size.

Grace put her coffee cup down. It was cold anyhow, though the brew had barely been lukewarm to begin with when she’d gone on her break.

Still. John Smith. Doctor. She should have seen through it immediately. The lack of ID, the odd things in the pockets, no money. And then the jelly babies. Oh, it had been planned, all right. Carefully. Not the stabbing, though she expected he’d have come up with one reason or another to see her. It was quite understandable that they didn’t replicate circumstances too much—and it wasn’t easy to fake a gunshot wound, not unless the entire hospital staff was in on it except her. The heart trouble may have been unexpected, or it may have been the reason he’d been the one to try it. She couldn’t be sure. X-rays inconclusive her foot. Perhaps they hadn’t even been taken.

Pursuing that thought, she went to check. But when she got there, she was informed that they had already been disposed of. She demanded to know why, without her even seeing them, particularly before they’d had a chance to take more, and had simply been told that it was out of their hands.

She cornered the newest addition to the staff. She didn’t know the man very well, and she wasn’t good at intimidating people, so she didn’t even try it. She merely pulled him aside and asked for the truth. What they had looked like.

Double exposure.

Double exposure. Yeah, right. As if she’d buy that after all this. Apologetic tone or not, even if he had been the one to take the blasted things— That didn’t matter. They were all in on it. What was this for? There was no rhyme, no reason. Who was trying to make her life hell?

She needed a break. And not just a measly five minutes. She wasn’t the only cardiologist in the hospital. They could cover for her. Oh, not easily, but they’d make do. She might lose her job, but, given the circumstances, she wasn’t so sure that wouldn’t be a bad thing. She’d thought about leaving after that first time, back in 1999. She hadn’t. She’d hung on, clinging to normality after her life had spun out of control. She’d used it as an anchor.

But some things you couldn’t bury so easily.

Given time, it would resurface.

Time.

She’d seen it backtrack, loop around, and play again. Just the once. But that experience had changed everything.

They always say that if it doesn’t matter in five, ten years, it doesn’t matter now, not really. Well, it had been five years. And it was still affecting her. And she was fairly sure another five wouldn’t change that.

She didn’t head to the parking lot, to her car. She knew she’d come back. But now…she needed to walk, now. Just to work off some of her frustration, expend her energy. She needed some time to think, where other things weren’t crowding her thoughts.

She nearly didn’t see him, sprawled on the bench as he was, fast asleep.

“Dr. John Smith,” she said, looking him over. She frowned as she studied him further. She’d seen the condition his clothes had been in, bloodied and torn. And while they were a bit raggedy, there were no gaping holes, no dark red stains stretching across large portions of the shirt. But she knew it had to be the same, because there were smaller spots of blood still there. Only, when she moved closer to get a better look at the material, she couldn’t tell that it had ever been ripped. The holes had closed up as if they had never been there.

How the hell had he managed that?

She shook him, intending to wake him up. He didn’t stir.

She felt for a pulse and yanked her hand back. He was cold. How long had he been out here? She pried open his eyelids, wishing she had a flashlight to better test pupil reactions, and then tried checking for a pulse again. She couldn’t find it, but his pupils had contracted slightly in the light when she stopped shading them with her hand. He wasn’t dead.

He really was in trouble after all.

It was all a bit more serious than she’d been led to believe, then.

“I’ve got to get you back inside,” she said. She looked dubiously at the lanky body splayed over the bench. He’d be heavy enough if she had to carry him. She’d be better off going inside and getting a wheelchair or someone to help her than struggle with him alone.

“And here I only wanted some time to think,” she muttered as she arranged the unconscious man into the recovery position.

She’d just finished making sure his head was tilted at the right angle when his eyes snapped open.

It was a bit hard not to shriek at that.

A grin spread across his face. “Hello, Grace,” he said as he pulled himself into a sitting position. “Just the person I wanted to talk to.”

“You need medical help,” she hissed, too angry with herself for losing her self-control earlier and for letting her emotions interfere with how she’d treated a patient than to wonder about how quickly he’d woken up, let alone how he’d woken up at all.

“Nah, better now. Had a bit of a rest. Didn’t expect to. Well, didn’t mean to. I did expect it would sneak up on me. Haven’t had much the last few days, and then, what with getting stabbed and all, well, I do need to replenish my energy now and then. Even I can’t run full-out forever.”

She grabbed his arm and only just stopped herself from pulling him roughly to his feet. “Come with me,” she said, her tone not allowing for argument.

“I don’t need to check back into the hospital if that’s what you’re thinking. If I need anything, I ought to see if I’ve got another zero room hiding out in the TARDIS somewhere. Listen, please. I just…. I think I need to talk to someone.”

Oh, and he was still at it. TARDIS indeed. Not that she knew where he got that bit about a zero room from, but that was beside the point. “I’ll make sure someone will be there to listen to you.”

He frowned, carefully extracting his arm from her grip. “I don’t need a visit from psychiatric,” he groused. But then his expression fell again. “Or perhaps I do, by your terms. But it wouldn’t help. Well, not me. I don’t need to end up in a padded room, thank you very much. Plenty to do without having to deal with that.” He sucked in a breath. “Please. You have to listen to me. I….” He trailed off. “It’s different now,” he said, starting again. “I’m alone now. Gallifrey’s gone.”

“Why do you insist on doing this?” Grace demanded, but she was uncertain now. There was something in his eyes….

“I can regenerate twelve times. But don’t worry; you’re the only one to kill me by punching a hole through my second heart. I’m not about to make that mistake again. Not that it was working earlier. Sign that I wasn’t doing so well, that. But she’s pumping now.” He caught her hands and placed one on either side of his chest before she could think to fight him—maybe because she didn’t want to. Maybe because she wanted it to be true.

A near-impossible duality of rhythm beat beneath her palms.

“There, see?” he asked, giving her a lopsided grin. “I’m easy to find. I’m the guy with two hearts.”