#and I was thinking how I don’t really fit the bisexual stereotype

[that-artistic-cryptid]

I’ve been thinking..every crush I’ve had on a guy has been when I was in elementary school, plus I could do this thing where I just made myself stop liking them. And I thought I was just unique like that. But I straight up made myself fall in love with them. I gave myself reasons to get a crush. First I thought for some reason that I should only be with someone my height. There were 2 guys the same height as me. I forced myself to love them. Then others. I’d give myself a narrative, kinda like a script that I should follow. All other men I’ve ever liked were either fictional or I would just crush on them for a whole summer, and the day we were supposed to see each other again I wouldn’t be in love anymore. Also that specific person I’m referencing was one of the first friends I’d made that were actual friends. So I do think the feeling was just friendship. I’ve only really liked fictional men. I don’t think I would like them romantically in real life

I saw a post about things op found attractive about men and like…I don’t know if it’s an asexual thing, I don’t THINK so because those things were mostly non-sexual. I might just be a lesbian, idk. Like I couldn’t imagine just stopping being in love with my gf, just because. I don’t think I could

[im-out-of-it]

making a complete list of my thoughts of the show vs books since I finished it and will probably leave some stuff out since I’m super forgetful, sorry ���

1. once again love that they upped the ages. glad we didn’t have centuries year old Magnus chasing teenager Alec or all the other inappropriate relationships in the books

2. Malec is fucking perfect on the show and it really showed that if any actually cares about them, they can make the characters much better and give the characters a better shot than the author ever did. I seriously love all the details Matt, Harry, and whoever wrote their episodes did. only one I cannot stand is when Alec doesn’t realize right away that Magnus and valentine switched bodies. but alec handled the immortality thing wayyyyyy better than book Alec ever could. book Alec (and pretty much TMI content and etc) barely exists let’s be real

3. Izzy and Simon are way too rushed in the series but at least they have more do a friendship and there’s no cheating storyline. but I kinda like Maia and Simon together. I feel that Maia understood Simon.

adding: I don’t mind Simon and clary in the show dating and the way they end things is not as harsh as it is in the books. maybe clary (I’m being kind lmao) actually cares about Simon in the show but still kinda uses him at times

4. might be the only thing I’ll say about the books that’s nice but it would’ve been cute to see the vacation storyline (eldest curses) in the show. would’ve been cute to see a Malec holiday and moving towards them having children 🥹

5. Maia doesn’t get enough credit. she’s one of the few sensible people on the show and gets more attention than book Maia ever did

6. speaking of Maia, I’m glad they didn’t go too extreme with the Jordan plot. in the books, I think she was made to feel to get over how Jordan treated her. but man, why does the actor have to be attractive 😭

7. I really like Maryse and Luke together. they fit each other quite well. Maryse has some of the best development in the show and I loved seeing her grow

8. glad Jocelyn was killed off. she was more insufferable in the books so glad the show decided they didn’t need that energy

9. Jace and clary are both clearly insufferable but it’s worse in the books. I feel like in the show they’re still pretty bad but it’s a little tamed

10. Alec deserved better than jace. dude had the audacity to act as though Alec is a fling, expected Alec at his beck and call to do whatever he wanted while not understanding or caring about Alec’s feelings and his needs, practically invites himself at Magnus’s place while being the worst roommate, and then taking for granted all the people who sacrificed (MAGNUS AND HIS MAGIC LITERALLY THIS LOVELY MAN LOSES HIS MAGIC AND HIS HOME AND HIS MIND) once again to help his worthless ass

11. wish they wouldn’t have killed ragnor off. we got to see a lot of vampires and wolves but not a lot of warlocks. would’ve been great to see more of Magnus’s friends. you could seriously make a whole show based off on Magnus and his life

12. kinda wish they kept camille around. I know she was drama for malec in the beginning but she’s still a very fascinating character

13. I’m 100% thankful for the show not following the books and creating their own world

14. I would’ve loved to see more of the alternate universe episodes. one of the best episodes

15. ALL THE MALEC PARALLELS. these two beautiful and desperately, devoted, in love with one another men are seriously the best part of the show 😭 the fact that there are no cheating stories (when Alec is all drunk, underhill is flirting and all Alec can talk about is Magnus. Magnus defies bisexual stereotypes when dot tries to kiss him.), no taking away immortality or throwing fits or bierasure, or any toxic storylines is one of my fav things about Malec. they’re just two beings who are so in love with one another, who communicate, and are just completely devoted to each other. and it’s one of the reasons why everyone was so hooked on Malec. they’re healthy but you’re also excitedly rooting for them 🫶🏼

16. Clary deserved to lose her ability with runes. the angels message was to not use her rune ability for whatever she pleased but she took advantage of it. but I will say, some helped but I feel that the rest she just used because she didn’t care

17. season three breakup wrecked me and I’ll not emotionally recover from that. it breaks my heart seeing Alec break his own heart and Magnus’s all so Magnus can have his magic and be whole again. I’m so glad they got married in the end 💓

18. I’m glad the twinning rune went to clary instead of jace because how many times does this worthless fucker need saved????? SERIOUSLY HOW MANY

19. I think Magnus recognizing what Alec needs at the beginning when they meet is beautiful. I don’t think it’s creepy (as some book fans state.) and it shows that Magnus understands that Alec is not ready to be out. I’m glad Magnus doesn’t get shitty with Alec on not being out like he does in the books

20. also book vs show thing. I actually like the whole marrying Lydia plot. I get the whole grand gesture of kissing in wherever they were- sanctuary???? (y’all cannot pay me enough to read TMI again, I will not go through that torture again) but I really hate that it’s not even in Alec or Magnus’s pov. CC makes a point of giving characters she chooses to have unnecessary pov

21. I probably forgot something but I mainly skipped all the clace content that didn’t involve Alec or Magnus but otherwise, messy show but so amazing for the Malec content. Izzy, Maia, Raphael, and Simon are a bonus as well. I’m just saying that the show could’ve been a whole lot worse lmao

[crystallinestars]

Wow, it’s such a relief to find people who don’t like Haikaveh either. Was really disappointed when I read Sethos’s voiceline.. I am bisexual and I think that Haikaveh (along with many other pairings) is queerbaiting and some type of fetish. I’ve made a long written analysis on why I think it is and how I think it’s offensive, simply because I find it interesting and enjoy analyzing things. Really love their duo and they’re great parallels but they fit a sibling / platonic soulmate duo better than a romantic one 🤦‍♀️ It’s getting annoying at this point and I wish Hoyoverse would stop, but it earns them attention and money so why would they? Just want to enjoy my favorite character without him being used as an accessory for another. Disappoints me that other gay people don’t notice (or care) that they are being stereotypical themselves and that Hoyoverse is basically using our sexualities for accessories and money. Haven’t looked into the translation thing with Sethos’s voiceline but if it’s true it was more neutral in CN, then that’s interesting. The same Haikaveh defenders will yap about how “CN is the original!1!1!1” but if you bring something like this translation up they lose it. Hoyoverse has never been a “gay representation” company, it’s a queer-baiting one. 🤦‍♀️ But at the same time, I don’t really even care. I’m not a gay person who cares much about my sexuality or others, but things like this are frustrating. Wish there were more people who understand my view on why I think their presentation is harmful.

- 🪷 / 🪽

Hello 🪷/🪽 Anon! (Let me know if you want to go by both emojis or just one) Welcome to our small club of not being into Haikaveh (or most Hoyoverse queer ships).

I agree with you that Kaveh and Haitham have a very sibling/platonic dynamic. In fact, their bickering reminds me a lot of my younger siblings’ bickering, so I view them as brothers, as well. It’s just unfortunate that the fandom rejects any interpretation that’s not romantic.

I also wish Mihoyo would stop, but they’re obsessed with tossing ship crumbs, and only to the most popular ships. As you said, it makes them money, so they have no reason to stop.

There is definitely some queerbaiting in Genshin, but I would say it’s not as bad as in HSR. HSR sometimes made me very uncomfortable with the fetishization of some of their ships, and I wondered if a man wrote it for a straight male audience…

Mihoyo has always had a history of wanting to include same-sex pairings in their games. Honkai Impact 3rd has a confirmed lesbian MC, and also two other female characters who canonically kiss (but due to updated laws in China, they had to remove that scene).

It doesn’t surprise me that they want to do similar things in Genshin and HSR, but they never commit to the ships. They only tease and hint at them, ala “There might be something between these characters, but also not really, but what if…?” and this is pretty much exclusive to same-sex pairings. This teasing and hinting makes the fandom so much worse to be in. Lots of other gacha games don’t do this, but for whatever reason, Mihoyo does.

I suspect some of the employees working on the game may be queer or have a huge interest in BL and GL (though it’s probably a mix of both), which is why they make all these ship crumbs. There’s nothing wrong with having queer relationships in games and other media, but the way they go about it feels… fetishizing, I guess? It doesn’t feel genuine. I can’t quite put my finger on what feels so off about this. You would know about this far more than me since you analyzed this already, so if you have interpretations you want to add, I’ll gladly hear you out.

It sucks because they market their games as being for all audiences, but then do things with a heavy bias for certain ships. It makes it so difficult to enjoy characters the way you want when the developer and fandom constantly shove in your face that your favorite character has an implied relationship or some other such thing.

Regarding the Sethos voiceline… my friend in China, who also dislikes Haikaveh, complained to me about it the other day. She said the original Chinese text felt like it was implying something between Kaveh and Haitham. Of course, that is just her personal interpretation, and some people don’t see a deeper meaning behind the words. However, it goes to show that even the Chinese audience can tell something is up with the voiceline, so it might not be as neutral as we hoped.

I’m all for more media having queer rep, but Mihoyo doesn’t do it right. I really wish I could just play their games without having ship teasing slapped in my face, but alas, they won’t ever change. At this point, it’s better to not play any of their games (though maybe Tears of Themis can stay) and ditch the fandoms for your peace of mind.

[frostyblustar]

First off: I absolutely LOVED „stray, the wolf will eat your head“!!

Second: PLEASE DO TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE DETAILS AND SYMBOLISM IN IT!!

Oh my god where do I even start with this fic?? I’m just gonna talk about random things that pop in my head as I scroll through (this is gonna be long)

The Path is literally called ‘dull’ ‘straight’ and ‘boring’ but also ‘safe’. This alludes to the Path being a metaphor for straightness.

Why is the forest filled with seemingly random objects/places-? They pertain to Nico’s identity, but also queerness can seem confusing.

The singular boot represents Nico’s initial loneliness. They come in pairs, and he has no Bianca or Percy at this time. He feels utterly alone, and feels alone in his own struggles and initial feelings about the forest.

Why is Bianca mentioned to have a more gray dress than white when she’s based on the Girl in White from The Path?… Because it would make her ‘The Girl in Gray’ but I don’t think anyone has catched on to that. Also she represents a sense of innocence before venturing into the world/experiencing a traumatic event, similar to The Girl in White from The Path.

The wolf will eat your head is essentially saying if you trust a wolf, you’re brainless. They take away your wits. There is also the scarecrow with no head in the flower field that is kind of a mockery of this.

Where is Bianca’s body?

Her bones are in the scarecrow in the flower feild. Since she serves as a strawman for a lot of people arguing against the forest. She was stuffed in there by one of those people long after her death. She is resentful of her lover who left her body to rot.

How did she die?

Dirt. A mudslide. Yeah the line ‘You make it sound like the dirt killed your family.’ is supposed to be irony, but since Bianca’s death is never mentioned it’s not really anything you’d catch onto, just background info.

The sword in the stone reference is just based on Nico’s love for stories, but he also gains a means of defending himself through it if needed. I believe this could mean he finds stories like these fuel his curiosity and give him wits to hold up on his own? But really it’s just a fun thing.

Dianthus and green carnations are the two flowers in the flower field. Dianthus mean ‘Flowers of the gods’ while green carnations represent homosexuality.

The powerlines between two poles represent Percy and Nico having a connection.

Piano and flute. The piano is supposed to represent Italian heritage while the flute is a symbol of nature. Also, I looked up ‘gay instruments’ and a lot of people think flute players are stereotypically gay so… Yeah…

Why does Percy wear blue? Well cause boy in blue cmon I CANNOT PASS THAT UP! Blue also represents a lot of things like freedom, open spaces like the sky, and a lot of the times sadness.

Who is Percy referring to when he says he knew someone who knew flowers well? Honestly, probably Calypso, but it’s 100% an ex he had to leave after being treated like shit for being bisexual. That’s all I had written out for that. If you don’t like Calypso, I also thought Jason might fit this ex role.

Spotted feathers, from what I found, represent a scattered mind (which is why they bother Nico specifically after Percy is talking) I also used removing them as a way of showing Nico rebelling against society/tradition.

A lot of the language used is supposed to be transferrable into a different context. Replacing the forest with homosexuality makes things super obvious. Honestly too much of the dialogue is supposed to be like that.

Anyways that’s all I got off the top of my head, thanks for reading. Ask any more questions if you want, start a thread even! I can definitely elaborate on even things I’ve already brought up if you want that.

The link to the fic I’ve been talking about by the way.

[misspermitted]

Being a sex-repulsed asexual a lot of coming out stories don’t really speak to my experiences. Because I don’t date, never will date, experienced dating exactly once (in a hetero-conforming relationship) for like 3 days and wanted to die. Generally I don’t even participate in LGBT+ discussions because I don’t have a lot of sexuality experiences (and if i start talking about my gender i might cry). I just linger in the background of my friend groups and give relationship safety advice. Offer pizza. Call out toxic behaviour. Offer more pizza.

The thing about communities is to share your experiences they need to fit into the community’s categories. And I don’t think that’s bad. LGBT+ spaces are safe spaces for those in the community, and in order for that to happen they have to exclude certain discussions. It’s like female-identifying only spaces should exclude male-identifying people. It’s the whole point of a community.

This said, the other point of community is feeling less alone via shared experiences. So I thought I’d share a funny part of my sexuality journey which did seem pretty queer:

How I Made My Family Believe in Asexuality by Being So Goddamn Asexual They Actually Couldn’t Not

My family is generally really nice and supportive. But they’re also low-key homophobic. They’re getting better, but my mother straight up didn’t believe bisexuality existed for most of my childhood because “Everyone is attracted to men and women, just pick one.” (Yeah. She identifies as bisexual now.) Every so often someone says something transphobic and I get to call it out. Last I checked my sister still thinks gender fluidity is just people being attention seeking.

So when I came out as asexual, my sister sat me down, very well meaning, and told me that she also didn’t feel a lot of sexual attraction but when she started dating it came (yeah, I know, demisexual coded, but I’m not touching whatever the hell is going on with her). And because we’d both grown up without a lot of physical affection it’s just that. I should just try dating someone. No matter what arguments I made to the contrary both her and the rest of my family would often make comments to that vein (because internalised homophobia doesn’t listen to reason).

My mother did a retrospectively hilarious The Sex Talk: Pt. 2 “there’s nothing wrong with you and you’re definitely not asexual don’t worry.” She sat me down, very serious, and assured me that women get turned on less easily than men. So not being turned on by porn or being able to masturbate was normal for some women and didn’t mean anything was wrong with me and I was “asexual.” That was a fun conversation.

Somehow, despite their inability to listen to reason, I solved this problem about two years after coming out.

The thing about coming out is that you slowly stop pretending you’re straight. I didn’t even realise I was pretending before I came out (because, you know, I wasn’t dating anyone). But I was actually masking hard. I talked about dating way too much. Made way too many dirty jokes. It was weird. I was overcompensating the hell out of it. Which, after I came out, I slowly called myself out on until I stopped.

And it turns out when I’m not pretending to be attracted to people I am hilariously, almost stereotypically, asexual. For example, about a year after I came out I was watching Thor with my sister and this shirtless scene happened:

My sister: 😳

Me (turning to her): Hey did you know that when Chris Hemsworth filmed this movie he was so dehydrated that he almost died? Actually that might’ve been the movie after this. But it’s a huge thing to get actors to look like that they dehydrate them, which seems like a lot of health concern just to make them look like Greek sculptures. I mean I know he’s supposed to be a god but i really don’t think it’s necessary. Like Norse gods had different beauty aesthetics anyway.

My sister: (just stares at me for a second) It’s not so he looks like a Greek god it’s so he looks attractive

Me: I know but do the aesthetics really matter that much?

My sister: No, like, people watch this specifically because they’re attracted to Chris Hemsworth in these scenes

Me: Oh. So it’s for audience engagement?

My sister: I… guess so?

And that is how I acted so asexual I actually convinced my sister to believe in it. She has not made a comment about my asexuality since.

The same thing has happened with the rest of my family members. One by one they have become corrupted because I am just too asexual to be denied. You cannot meet me and maintain a state of disbelief.

We’ve gotten to the point where my mother is so certain about my sexuality she got offended for me, because “someone was calling themselves asexual but was in a sexual relationship with someone.” (We had a lovely discussion again about asexuality being a spectrum and just reflecting you having a not-normal level of sexual attraction. She still thinks this invalidates my experience and struggles which is very nice of her but once again I do not care. If people want to be one of the only sexualities still classified as a mental illness in the DSM-5 then the more the merrier. Gatekeep pizza not oppression.)

[girltalkcollectives]

Eight Years of Telling Myself “It’s Probably Just a Phase” (Spoiler Alert: It Wasn’t)

I was 12 when I thought “I might be bisexual,” and 20 when I finally stopped following that thought with “but probably not.” That’s eight whole years of playing mental ping-pong with my own identity.

You know that thing where you’re watching a movie and find yourself equally attracted to both the male and female lead, but then spend the next two hours convincing yourself it’s just “appreciating” their beauty? Yeah, did that for about a decade.

The mental gymnastics I put myself through were honestly Olympic level:

At 12: “I think I like girls too.”

Also at 12: “But everyone thinks girls are pretty, right?”

At 15: “Okay, maybe I’m bi.”

Also at 15: “It’s probably just hormones.”

At 17: “I definitely like both.”

Also at 17: “No, there’s no way.”

At 19: “I’m bisexual!”

Also at 19: “Unless…?”

It’s wild how you can be so sure of something one day and completely doubt it the next. Like yes, I’ve had crushes on multiple genders since middle school, but what if I’m just really friendly?

The amount of times I’ve googled “Am I bisexual?” is honestly embarrassing. As if there’s going to be some magical quiz that finally gives me permission to claim this identity.

And can we talk about how unhelpful society is with all this?

“It’s just a phase.”

(Eight years is a long phase, Karen.)

“You’re just confused.”

(About many things, yes, but not this.)

“You’ll pick a side eventually.”

(The only side I’m picking is fries with that.)

“But you’ve only dated men!”

(And you’ve only dated men too, Sarah, does that make you a virgin?)

The worst part wasn’t even the external doubt — it was the internal voices. The constant questioning. The feeling that I wasn’t “bi enough” because my attractions to different genders felt different. Like somehow I needed a perfectly balanced attraction meter to qualify.

Nobody tells you that being bi doesn’t mean your attraction to different genders has to be identical. That it can shift and flow. That you don’t need a 50/50 split to be valid.

I spent so long thinking I wasn’t bisexual because I didn’t fit the stereotype. Because I didn’t have my big gay awakening moment at pride wearing a rainbow flag as a cape. Because my journey was more like:

Sees pretty girl

“Wow, she’s gorgeous!”

Five hours of questioning my entire identity

Concludes it’s probably just appreciation

Repeat for eight years

But here’s what finally clicked at 20: There is no “bi enough.” There’s no test to pass. No quota to meet. No perfect balance to achieve.

Being bisexual isn’t about proving anything to anyone. It’s not about meeting some arbitrary criteria. It’s about finally looking at yourself and saying “Oh, this makes sense.”

To my 12-year-old self: You weren’t confused. You were just discovering who you are.

To my 15-year-old self: Those butterflies you got around your male best friend and female lab partner? Both real. Both valid.

To my 17-year-old self: You weren’t “going through a phase.” You were going through self-discovery.

And to my current self: You don’t need to keep questioning something you’ve known for eight years.

Sometimes I wonder how much sooner I would have accepted myself if someone had told me:

Bisexuality doesn’t have an equal attraction requirement

Your identity is valid regardless of your dating history

You don’t need to “prove” your sexuality to anyone

Doubt doesn’t make your identity less real

You’re allowed to take time to figure it out

So here I am at 20, finally comfortable saying: I’m bisexual. No “probably” about it. No “but” following it. Just me, finally accepting something I’ve known since I was 12.

Plot twist: Maybe the real phase was pretending it was a phase.

[theraddestfemalive]

Y’know what? Fuck it. I’m going to say this

I don’t think any non-gc or tra lib gives a fuck about what im about to say, even considering that im going to tag the cr fandom.

I’m only adding one radfem tag because this post is centered around another topic.

i feel like ever since the trans population has tripled, it hasn’t been the same. Before any of you cucks think im talking about the idea of being trans, im also talking about the community behind it. Their ideas within the concept of it.

the concept of being ‘transgender’ was built on the foundation of sexist stereotypes; although the origins had a different purpose in ancient societies (varying ofcourse), it was ultimately used as a weapon to oppress women in the modern times, the goal was to make a person ‘feel’ like a male or female and now trillions of micro labels and gender identities are used to describe people who feel slightly above the normal and they’re treated as if they’re some kind of clothes that you put on instead of an identity.

Because of this, most people don’t even know what a woman or a lesbian is. They try to replace the definition of something that was exclusive to one sex to cater to the whims of men.

Ever since last year, most my friends that weren’t into that shit now identify as trans and I saw a dramatic shift in their personality. Most if not all of them were autistic women that did not conform of societal standards of what a ‘woman’ is. Some people may argue it’s because of how lightly a transgender identity is perceived. But on my end, I think it also has to do with the lack of representation of quirky female characters in media.

likely I would’ve fit into one of those micro labels or some shit like that but I was lucky enough to discover characters and things that I aligned with so I didn’t have to deal with shitty gender dysphoria (alongside with my very obvious mental issues and me being neurodivergent myself)

When I look at the older cookie run art (2016-2021), or even from eastern countries (eastern countries aren’t really politically correct) I could truly see the characters in the scene. There is passion behind it. The artists are either older or they know what they’re doing. And it doesn’t seem like an overload

when I see newer cookie run ‘fanart’ esp when there’s a lot of people within the western community, I don’t see a lot of what the characters truly are. All I see is their interpretation of what their character would look like if it was an unoriginal copy of a 14 year old gendie’s oc. Alongside with that, they add a thousand headcanons and sexualities, making the character unrecognizable. And if that wasn’t the cherry on top, they’re so obsessed with lgbtq and race stuff (no im not a bigot, don’t even try to fucking label me as one im a bisexual woc ) that’s all what they talk about besides stupid discourse topics. Oh, and also changing a dough color is ‘racist’ (they’re fucking COOKIES. Their dough color was based off of their ingredients and complimentary colors, even the devs had to explain and yet the western community still bitches about it like whiny 5 year olds. They come in all colors, not just fucking skintones.)

I think the characters and ships of the community would be much more likable for me if it wasn’t infiltrated by the discourse gang.

I think instead of giving drugs and cosmetic surgery to children, we should get deeper into the psychology of why there’s a lot of trans people on the rise. Don’t you think it’s weird that it has to be an ‘urgency’ to get surgery or children will kts? Maybe instead of thinking it as a life or death situation, think of how most of these people are mentally ill compared to the other lgbtq demographics.

I probably sound like a fucking dick here and im going to get a lot of hateful notes and messages, but honestly.. idgaf

Before you water this down to ‘trans people bad’ im just highlighting the problems of their community and its immense effect on teens my age (13-15 age range im not telling you) before dickriding the movement, I think *again* we should get deeper into the psychology of these people, thank you for reading.

maybe one or two people know who i am because of the image i will show below, who cares lol

i will block if I receive any threats :)))

[dearweirdme]

i am not trying to be mean but i rlly do get an ick from “tkkrs” admitting the hello kitty threw them off in jk’s vlog. i do not understand how if you suspect two MEN to be in a romantic relationship you still fall victim to such stereotyping. i do not get how you refuse to see jk for his entire self. suddenly it is entirely believable once the hello kitty is next to tae? he is not a woman, he is not more “feminine” than jk and to try and fit them into such roles makes me think that non shippers who call shippers fetishizers have a point.

Hi anon!

I was joking with the former anon.. but I do agree with you.

I think there’s several layers in our Tkk fandom. Some are leaning more towards classical shipping, just enjoying the thought and perhaps occasionally wondering if it’s actually true. Some are more in it for the mystery of it all.. constantly trying to find out clues. Others don’t really know what they’re looking at and go from ‘it’s true’ to ‘it’s not true’ in a heartbeat. And then there’s some who really consider the deeper context of what being queer is actually like.

I think many don’t actually give the queer context and what life for Tae and Jk (and other queer artists) would be like much thought. Many people treat this as how they would think about a ‘normal’ relationship… and sadly the ‘normal’ these days still often is a relationship between a man and a woman (and all the ‘normal’ gender aspects that entails). Aside from the queer part of this fandom.. I don’t think there are many who actually immerse themselves into researching and understanding queer history and queer media. Many would have watched Call me by your name, and Love Simon, because those were mentioned by Tae and Jk. But have they gone beyond that? Can someone understand queer reality by watching only those?

I too have a real ick when it comes to people talking about a ‘feminine’ partner and a masculine partner when it comes to queer couples. Like.. yo.. the whole point is that gay men love men and lesbian women love women. It’s harmful and very misogynistic even. Because it sends the message that a softer man isn’t a full man, and that a more masculine woman should be a man. And it sets bisexual persons up to be perceived as confused or not being able to pick a side. Buh… I hate it.

[d4t-webserial]

D4T: Page 6 (Alice POV)

//cw: transphobic slur// go here for more info on d4t

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Alice’s been able to get Lu to hang out very often (pretty much whenever they both have free time ;p). Having this large amount of time in person she’s been able to realize some more things about him.

First off he isn’t a chaser… well he is in that he’s a “man” (we’ll get into that later) who likes trannies, but he doesn’t fit with… what you'd call the stereotype of “chaser”, but that’s not what made her come to this conclusion. No, it’s whenever she calls him a chaser he’ll visibly cringe, most men who are shameless enough to use 4chan *and* openly admit to dating tgirls are more than comfortable using chaser to describe themselves, so something about it has gotta be off to him. Secondly he’s really feminine like *super*, don’t get her wrong she wasn’t one of those weirdy homophobic girls who usually call themselves allies but would rather their boyfriend cheat on them than be bisexual, and she always knew Lu wasn’t exactly… super masculine (the idea of him doing typical straight man posturing was both ridiculous… and upsetting), but he’s *so* feminine in how he holds himself and talks... and honestly even his body (his hands are so smooth). This leads her to a simple conclusion, he isn’t *really* a chaser but instead a repper in denial (honestly she should have seen this sooner it’s a classic chaser archetype), now other girls usually talk about these chasers as bad and to be avoided, she didn’t know if this was cause there was something inherently bad about your boyfriend trooning out on you or is it’s just about the gender, due to not knowing she assumes the latter and luckily for her she’s a **massive** bishit (she has decided this as of now) and if he (or should she switch to "she"?... nah, she’ll give him the benefit of the doubt) takes the pinkpill she can still make him her girlfriend… unless he was straight technically but he obviously isn’t (he’s the dictionary definition of agp t4t transbian… except he isn’t into diapers… she hopes).

While hanging out they tended to fall into an interesting pattern whether it’s at her house in her room or at his dorm when his roommate’s out, he’ll sit at some large but not too noticeable distance away from her (he isn’t as subtle as he thinks), then while they’re talking or watching one of his shows or playing video games (well he plays she just watches, unless it’s mario kart she’s the fucking best at mario kart) she’ll move ever so closer, bit by bit so he can pull back if he wants (he never does) until she’s right next to him, she doesn’t go overboard only the sorta interactions that’d make sense for… completely platonic friends (but like… gal pal friends). Whenever she leans on him he stops making much sense like his brain is malfunctioning, and she can totally hear his heartbeat. One time she caught him looking at her and could’ve swore he was gonna kiss her… but he didn’t, ever since then he’s been a bit more distant, not much tho… just, a bit.

gsrtgsgkgnrstlhnrturwlj okay… okay… it’s okay… she’ll just wait for him to be ready, she’s okay with that, he’ll make a move… eventually,... but he *is* autistic like sooooo autistic, he might not know she’d like it, maybe if she told him… oh god…

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “hey lu”

trashbag_minister (Lu): “hi”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “i have smth i wanna tell u”

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trashbag_minister (Lu): “what is it?”

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she starts typing

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Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “if you want to date i would like that”

trashbag_minister (Lu): “oh”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “i kno u said u werent dating a while back i just”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “if u wanted to kno i guess”

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trashbag_minister (Lu): “i’m detrans”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “what?”

trashbag_minister (Lu): “i was a trans girl for,, a while, but i stopped”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “i kno tht”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “or i didn’t kno u were but i kno what detran means”

Tranny Mona Lisa (Alice): “why?”

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Too anxious to wait for a response she put her phone down… fuck, he’s a detransitioner. What does that mean? Like why tho… the only detransitioners she’d seen were the bald ones on twitter saying she was in a cult, she didn’t even know trans women detransitioned, well like obviously they do at least one did, but like… she hadn’t thought about it. Is he like… one of those ex-gay people, using her in the same way an “ex” gay uses anonymous hookups on grindr to satisfy some repressed desire. Did he think his body was mutilated, or that hers was? Why did he identify as a chaser, or go on /tttt/? Did he actually like trans girls… she had thought he did but was “chaser” just an excuse to be a cis man in trans spaces? He always seemed so supportive, but she thought detransitioners hated the trans community for “ruining” their bodies. Did he hate all trans people or only himself… Was he still the same person, Her Lu?

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[hellomynameisbisexual]

My parents regularly sent me articles over the next several months explaining that attraction to the same gender was artificial, a new fad, and dangerous. All factually incorrect. While I had initially been very comfortable and confident that I had found a label that described my experiences and feelings, under this constant barrage I was forced into a cycle of constant self-doubt. This self-doubt included new doubts toward my sexual orientation, but also my relationship with my religion, my relationship with my family, my ability to be faithful to a significant other, and more. Over time, and by establishing boundaries with my family, I eventually overcame those doubts. The self-imposed isolation and self-doubt is a pain that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I count myself lucky for being able to resolve it without any permanent harm done to myself or my relationships.

Within the LGBTQ community I have experienced a less dramatic form of prejudice, but one that still isolates me and tries to control my identity. I have strongly felt pressure that I am not queer enough to belong, unless I date men or genderqueer people regularly. I feel pressure that if I only date people of the opposite gender, then aren’t I just really straight? If I’m not queer enough, then should I really have any authority or say about LGBTQ issues and representation? People think that I have it off easy, because I could just stay in the closet and hide forever and get married to someone of the opposite gender and just vanish. To that I ask, since when has living in the closet become a cool and lucky option? I will be judged no matter who I chose to be in a relationship in. Suddenly who I date has become a symbol of status within the community.

I don’t know when it became the business of anyone who I choose to date, but the fact is that by being bisexual I will live under constant scrutiny by people to see just how queer I am. People in the LGBTQ community will try to gate-keep and isolate me, and others, if we do not match their favorite vision of our identity. People outside of the community will be curious if I fit the stereotypes, send unsolicited invites to be part of a threesome, question if I am just trying to be cool or part of a fad, and judge how valid I am in my identity. Biphobia is controlling and invalidating. It is the attempt to force a person to match your view of who they should be, especially in a way that is convenient for you. Biphobia is the erasure of the third letter of the acronym, remembering people only as gay or straight. Biphobia is wrong. It is dangerous. It is the sexualizing and objectification of people for selfish motives.

The B is the third letter of the acronym, and I claim my right to remain in the LGBTQ community and live authentically.

[wodania]

honestly no i don’t think it’s weird at all to be upset about the exclusion of satin in the show.. if anything though as a gay guy im pretty glad they didn’t have him if loras is any indicator.. imagine them with a fairly effeminate gay coded character? no thanks 🫣

Loras was a sign of the end times 😭 I think I’ve made a joke before that if JonCon had been included he probably would’ve been written like one of those modern family dads and I feel more and more right each passing day.

Gonna rant a little (a whole shit ton like it’s really long I’m so sorry I got carried away) about gender and sexuality in ASOIAF/GoT here because I’m a lesbian and obsessed with analyzing these things :

tldr; D&D set up gender roles/rules where there weren’t previously any, and removed and added character traits as they saw fit (especially looking at feminine = gay and masculine = straight). If a character did not fit their perceived mould, such as Qarl the Maid, Jon Connington, and Satin, and could not be altered to fit that perceived mould, they were cut entirely. They also, in a possible attempt to be more relatable to a gay audience, introduced systematic religious homophobia where it was not previously, brutalizing their gay character. They wrote them as stereotypes and ignored them if they could not possible be shaped into one of their stereotypes.

GRRM obviously plays with gender roles and dynamics with his characters, yet D&D makes it so black and white. Gay people are all effeminate men. Hell, even Asha/Yara falls into this. She and her lover Qarl are a major fuck you to westerosi gender roles and expectations. He’s an effeminate man and she’s a masculine woman in a dominate powerful position. Yet he’s removed from the show. Absolutely no hate to queer “Yara”, but it is interesting in hindsight how that ended up working out. Had she been written differently, I’d argue that bisexuality compliments her character - if it weren’t for the history D&D has. When they do play with gender roles, it’s so tacky and one dimensional and ends with weird, nonsensical scenarios of female badassery with none of the development present in the books. Then, on the other hand, any vulnerability or deviance from societal expectations that male characters experience are wiped clean. Jon Snow is made into a generic fantasy hero type. Men who are seen as “weaker” or more “submissive” are brutalized on screen as torture p/rn, as shown with Theon Greyjoy. And men who are gay must be effeminate or promiscuous in one way or another. Loras deviated from that, so he had to be stripped of his defining traits and turned into fan service. Satin deviated from that even more, being a sex worker, and was stripped from the show entirely. Loras didn’t sleep with men enough, and the show writers wanted to change that. But Satin slept with men too much, and was in too close of proximity narratively and physically to fantasy hero Jon Snow. They wanted gay sex depicted in an easily digestible way for their perceived cishet audience, and found the idea of a boy selling his body to survive abysmal and not appropriate for such an audience, though they had no problem exploiting female prostitutes for the pleasure of the viewers . And in a weird attempt to be “relatable” to modern audiences, d&d introduced a self imposed barrier: homosexuality being illegal. Likely thinking that gay audiences would love to see their favourite gay Loras Tyrell brutalized and spat upon, D&D did exactly that, failing to realize that gay audiences would much rather see a queer character existing in a dark fantasy without their sexuality being what puts them in danger, compared to seeing something they already witness every day (religious-motivated violence and persecution) thrown into the show. Like it’s such an insult to the source material, especially considering that the 1990s book that hardly makes explicit references to the relationship of Loras and Renly does a better job at making them likeable, well developed characters than the “modern” 2010s tv drama. The flower crown, rainbow, cutesy edits dating back to the early days of Game of Thrones is a far cry from the depiction of politically savvy Renly and brutal and bloody Loras in the books. And the show just kind of encouraged that view of the two, as the cutesy gay boy fan service, hairless as a newborn baby and scared of blood. On the topic of JonCon, it would have been near impossible to introduce him and have him fit this set rule of “effeminate men = gay” and “masculine men = heterosexual”. JonCon is an intimidating, stone faced character who’s demeanour is hinted at being similar to that of Tywin fucking Lannister, as Tyrion almost accidentally refers to Jon as “father”. Aka, Jon is scary af. He’s older, grey, potentially dated the ugliest man in Essos who was also significantly older than him, and is also a father. Hardly a character that can be put into the set limiting roles of the show.

I’m honestly going to stop myself right here this is getting too long and I should just sit down and write an essay 💀 like genuinely I should write a paper

[ask-serendipity-sky]

https://www.tumblr.com/serendipitous-sky/725316700426420224/no-i-mean-generally-even-if-they-are-no?source=share

RE-EDITED VERSION 😅

people really don't guess/think JK is gay

most QUEER armys/fans think he's at least bi, if not gay lol

hasn't shown any over interest in men except PJM tbh

so nj being his "boy crush", staring at and idolizing g dragon, iron man being his celeb crush, choosing the male lead form the k-drama 2521 when asked to choose between the two female leads, baby gay jk hopping around all giggly bc vhope (th + jh) were kissing, being nervous and giggly about meeting the skr men's football team during the world cup (when he performed 'dreamers' in qatar), flashing his abs at fanboys at ptd, saying yes to fanboys asking him out at a fansign event, getting happy when male fans call him handsome, and liking to be called hyung more than oppa mean nothing??

also even if it was just jm, demisexual is a thing anon 💀

had a gf before

that he didn't talk to for a couple hundred days lol

also when asked "if you see a really pretty girl after going to school, what will you do?" jk said "just pass her by"

or when asked "you’re asked out by a girl who you don’t like. what would you tell her without hurting her feelings?”, jk said "can i be honest? i don’t feel anything when i see you.”

also from MY OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, i'm a lesbian but in elementary school (age 5 - 11) i had a "boyfriend" that i then proceeded to completely forget about/did not talk to for i don't even know how long, and he had even switched schools without me knowing/caring lol...

loves IU

jk has been asked about his "ideal type" MANY times, and it has kept changing, at some point he even seemed to be describing jm...

imo jk sees iu as his idol, like how western queers/gays are with lady gaga/britney/ariana grande (jk admires her too btw 😭)

doesn't 'look or sound' gay

this is very homophobic and weird to say anon...

"doesn't look/act/sound gay" is exactly why we have so many people not willing to except th and jk, bc they're basing if someone is "gay enough" on stereotypes of queer/gay people

also this fandom has a hard time even saying jm, someone who "fits" those stereotypes, is bisexual/queer when the man has been screaming it since forever, but especially recently during face

seems you don't pay enough attention to jk and/or queer people

Edit to add:

Good morning anon,

People who don't know want to know these things about Jk or who refuse these things by making excuses are people who are threatened by the real him.

Perhaps they are homophobic or dislike the idea of jikook happening or think Jk will someday be into them.

Just let him be.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[bookscandlesnbts]

You’d be surprised by how many girls LOVE fuckboys. Isn’t it one of the most popular tropes in fanfics? Imo, it’s not really that deep down they think JK is a fuckboy: it’s more that they want him to be. It’s the only attribute from the typical fuckboy prototype he’s missing right now: he’s young, famous, talented, beautiful, fit, into typical masculine stuff like boxing, motorcycles (if the rumor about him having one is true), he has tattoos and piercings, a big dog, a big car, he likes looking a bit tough. Having lots of girls in his arms would just increase his status even more, signal he has potential for being a good lay (which, from what I’ve heard, does not always correlate 🙃) AND it would counterbalance his feminine/dainty side that many Armys don’t like and/or don’t want to acknowledge. Also, him being potentially bisexual or gay (imo, it’s the last option and it’s been obvious from day 1) decreases his attractiveness in the eyes of many fans: the typical fuckboy is straight, or it’s not fun and sexy anymore. You got to keep the fantasy alive, thinking deep down that YOU could be one of his girl. Even if, in reality, there’s not even 0.001% chance, you can imagine that eveeeeeentually it’s still a tiny tiny chance, and it’s still better than if he’s into guys! In real life, lots of girls fall for that type of guys. And then cry about it when he doesn’t want to settle down with them, because they realize they’re not THE ONE for him, aka the one that’s going to make him drop the fuckboy life, but that’s another story (I’m not talking about my own experience, I swear). They want the guy who’s popular with women, and the whole kpop industry capitalizes on this.

PS: I’m over generalizing of course, not all women are attracted to the fuckboy type, but a subsequent amount of girls/young women are, even more so in kpop fandoms because the industry precisely thrives on it.

Hi anon. Oh I’m well aware that fuckboys are popular and romanticized in media. I agree with you that some of these people just want Jungkook to be. I think they don’t know him they just see someone attractive with muscles and tattoos and can sing and dance and equate that to the bad boy trope in a romance novel.

Soooo many ARMYs don’t acknowledge his dainty side and I’m sure these new y/n stans don’t even know it exists. Jungkook can act very “babygirl” at times with his mannerisms. But that doesn’t fit the straight fuckboy stereotype.

They definitely need to keep the fantasy alive hence those that feel the need to shut down any mention of him not possibly being straight. It jumps to “don’t assume someone’s sexuality!!” Which is actually a deeply homophobic response, implying that being something other that hetero is a bad thing, but I digress.

I don’t know how to make it stop, but I’m hopeful that when we start getting regular content again that involves a certain sun and moon duo, that we will see these people fade to the background again. It will be harder for them to maintain their stance.

[rodolfoparras]

Palladium anon here again :3 tho if it's not taken could I be the 🌱 anon?

and yes absolutely horn play is hot, especially when the character is really sensitive with them. Teasing them and/or using them as handle bars when fucking them??? Extremely hot. I've seen some ppl want to like fuck the horn and in theory I understand but most horns are pointy😭 you're gonna scratch up your holes bestie be careful

Also sharing my winx, trix , specialist and some others sexuality headcanons because I have been hyperfixated on this forever and I'm so happy to find other queer ppl to talk to about it!!

Helia and Flora are definitely bi or pan, you can not convince me otherwise. I'd say they're poly curious maybe?? Despite the show having every single couple go through a jealousy arc🙄 I think Flora and Helia would definitely be open to dating someone else if they both liked them

Riven, Bloom and Stella are all bi with a male preference

Layla and Naboo are a bisexual power couple and I will die on this hill

Musa and Timmy are bi with a fem preference.

Brandom is straight, mandatory for every queer friend group is the one cishet guy that's just there.

Sky is questioning, having gay thoughts from living in the dorms with other men and seeing them shirtless

Now I'll probably get hate for it but I think Tecna as an aroace lesbian is neat. Like her and Timmy were cute ig but I like tecna better on her own outside a relationship. Also her struggling with feeling like a human and more robotic fits with the unfortunate stereotype aroace ppl get. Her arc reminds me of what my aroace brother went through

And as I mentioned before, Palladium is definitely a bisexual transmasc! Avalon and Valtor are gay

Icy is a mean lesbian Darcy is bi with male preference. Stormy isn't sure what exactly she is but definitely not straight.

You can def be 🌱 anon sugar!!

And yes I def agree that the most appropriate ways when it comes to hornplay(word?) is to use them as handle bars, fidgeting with them to rile up your partner or even licking and sucking also one thing idk if this is possible but like if they could make the horns vibrate by humming and have the sound travel through their body and up to their horns?🧎🏻‍♂️

I def agree that helia and flora are bi or pan! Especially helia I’m not trying to say that gay ppl have a look bc fuck stereotypes but…look at this man I wouldn’t even be surprised if helia went by he/ they

Also I can def see riven as bi. One thing I rmr disliking is how toxic his and musas relationships became I’m sorry but it was so silly to me even at that age 💀 like every other episode there was jealousy drama

Also I forgot about Naboo man he was so pretty!!! And I can def see both of them being bi!

SUGAR IM FUCKING SCREAMING BC TWLL WHY I KNEW WHO BRANDON WAS BEFORE EVEB SEARCHING IT UP MOST ANNOYIMG ASS STRAIGHT MAN

Also yes!! I 100% agre that sky is bi curios big buff dude crushes on another big buff dude

Also I really like your take on tecna! Tbh I rmr even as. Kid i could understand she did not want to be in a relationship 💀

Avalon and valtor are definitely old gays 🧎🏻‍♂️🧎🏻‍♂️

Also I like your take on the sisters! I don’t have much else to say bc lord knows they annoyed me in the show 😭

[mogai-sunflowers]

I'm not trying to like... Start a fight? But it's ahistorical to say that the only reason bi sapphics left the lesbian label is because political lesbians drove them out. It's not true. There are many cases of bi sapphic and bi achillian activists who wanted to be defined by their own sexuality and not by their sex acts. It removes the autonomy of bisexuals to claim we all were so weak that lesbian separatists drove us out for feminist reasons when the political lesbians your mentioning, not by name given but it's not really needed, were a fringe group whose harm is indeed large but often over exaggerated. They wouldn't have that power to literally change all of lesbian culture and it's community and make bi sapphics leave. In my opinion, based on historical documents of both lesbian and bisexual activists and writers from the 1920 up til about the 1960s, it was just a natural shift in the community. Bisexuals wanted their own label outside of just being forced to swing between straight and gay depending who we're with and to claim they just got basically shoved out of lesbian bars and slapped with the bi label just.... Isn't true and ignores large swabs of bisexual history in trying to own our identity and the acceptance of bisexuals in mlm and wlw spaces.

I'd love to see counter evidence and I'm not opposed to the mspec lesbian label but as someone who loves and inspects bi History, this narrative that we were simply kicked out and it was the mean lesbian's fault is often used to encourage lesbophobia and simply... Isn't true. I deeply encourage you to check up on bisexual history concerning activists and the separation of the mlm and wlw communities maybe in different places than you haven't prior and how, for most of us, we left the gay and lesbian communities willingly because LGBT enforced biphobia was just as rampant back then as it is today and we wanted our own identity outside of just sex acts.(which deeply did and still dose contribute to the biphobic sediments that bisexuals are flirtatious and unloyal cheaters and liars. it wasn't just cishets calling us that stuff.)

I hope this doesn't sound passive aggressive or demeaning in anyway, that's not what I'm trying to say. I'm just tried of this take that it was mean lesbian supremacists that kicked us out without a source ever to be found and just buckets and buckets of bi activists talking about bisexuality and how they wanted a label and place of their own going completely unnoticed and unacknowledged because it doesn't fit the narrative that often underlines arguments concerning mspec lesbianism next to mono lesbianism ("bi lesbians are great and automatically unproblematic but monosexual/cis lesbians are automatically suspicious and terfy" kind of trash with no introspection into how that's blatantly lesbophobic regardless of any trans/mspec standpoint. Not just bigoted and applying your own stereotype on a fellow queer person because of terfs (also reinforces the terf sediment that terf is just the new word for lesbian) but also just patently not true.)

I fully agree with everything you’re saying, I normally talk only about the political lesbianism aspect because it was pretty violent and it’s what I know most about, I know it’s not the sole reason for what happened. so in that regard I’m sorry for misrepresenting that part of history.

however, I don’t think that pointing out the impact lesbian separatism has had on the community is in opposition to that. lesbian community used to always be about celebrating the joy of love for women, not about not being attracted to men. im not saying there’s anything wrong with being proud of not being attracted to men, or that individuals shouldn’t define themselves that way in relation to their lesbianism, but political lesbianism DEFINITELY reflected a shift that has made the general entity of the lesbian community much less about love for women, which is in my opinion a loss. it’s become more about excluding people based on an attraction quota than it has been about including people who personally resonate with the lesbian label and experience. The exclusionary part came from political lesbianism, and that’s evident in the way so many younger lesbian communities operate nowadays. Bi activism wasn’t about trying to force a rift between the two communities, but rather to acknowledge their general distinctions, so to me it’s not as relevant to the history of lesbian exclusionism. But I don’t know enough about that aspect of history to truly form an opinion on it, so I would really appreciate if you could send some of the sources you’re talking about!!

overall, I agree with you that i and others should take those aspects of queer history into account more, and I’d love to learn more about it, but I don’t think it’s any less important to acknowledge the roots of the exclusionism that so many lesbians face. i do not at all think that lesbian and terf are synonymous and I hate that people think they are, but acknowledging that the roots of radical feminism partially lie within lesbian feminism, isn’t saying that, it’s acknowledging how transphobia and biphobia have played a real part in our history. it’s not “mean lesbians” it’s bigoted people who used their lesbian identity as an excuse to promote exclusionary and reactionary queer politics /info /nm

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

I am so sorry if this may sound ignorant (I have been doing online school for about 3 years now and havent really been around many people my age for a while so I don't know if this plays into my question or not)

I have 2 questions

1. I use the pronouns she/her (it's just what I have always been comfortable with) but I prefer to were more masc or boy stereotypical clothing I guess you could say. Now I do like girl clothes but not as much. I think im just confused if it's a body thing or a gender thing because I like masc clothes so much since they just fit my body better I definitely feel more comfortable in them, but I also like to wear fem presenting clothes as well that may be more form fitting. And you know sometimes I want to put on a suit and strut around in it and sometimes I want to put on a dress it just depends.

2. I am very confused about my sexuality lol. I don't think I realized people could even be more than what society had already deemed as normal and around the age I would have probably began to explore my sexuality covid hit and everything went online. (For reference I am about to turn 16 and would have been 13 when the pandemic hit) I feel the same when I see an attractive female as I would an attractive male (this goes for anyone really if I find them attractive I can feel attraction to them, whether it's a platonic, romantic, or sexual attraction genuinely don't know) I also am fine reading sex scenes but whenever people talk about it in person or if I watch it on tv that's when I get uncomfy and I genuinely can't see myself having sex with someone (idk if that will change or not) but im fine with seeing myself being in a relationship and cuddling expressing my love for a person and sometimes kissing (it depends)

I am so sorry that this was sooo long and all over the place my brain is all messy when I don't plan things out before I write or say anything, and you don't have to answer of course this was just me ranting about how I have no clear thoughts as to who I am yet and it feels good to get it off my chest lt even if you don't answer or even see this.

Thank you genuinely it feels good to talk.

No need to apologise!! I’m here for u :] That’s good, I’m glad writing this ask helped you feel better—try and write shit down sometimes, even if it’s just hastily typed into a google doc and immediately deleted. Shit’s magic honestly.

Preferring or liking masculine clothing doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re transgender. Like obviously it’s a possibility but it’s not like, oh I like pants instead of skirts that means I’m a guy!! You could be trans or you could just be a girl who likes different types of clothing.

My advice is like, don’t sweat it too much, and just do what makes you happy. If you like masculine clothing, fucking go for it!!! I’m sure you’ll slay 100%!! If you wanna wear form fitting stuff, go for that too!! Just. Do what makes you feel like yourself, and do what makes you feel happy, don’t worry about labels and am-i-trans-am-i-cis and all that, kay? Just Vibe!!!!!!

I’d suggest you consider mspec labels, which means attraction to multiple genders, labels like bisexual and pansexual, or just plain old bi and pan might be good for you!!

You can look into the asexual spectrum, which is basically all sexualities that aren’t like 100% allosexual (allosexual means like. most of the population and how they experience sexual attraction.)

Yes, attraction can be confusing. And yes, it’s possible the stuff you feel might change. Maybe you’ll feel sexual attraction someday, or maybe you never will!!

But go with what you like *now.* If bi feels good, go for bi! If asexual feels good, go for it. If you wanna change it later, that’s okay!!

I’m gonna give you my standard new shoe advice—yknow when you have rlly shitty old shoes but you’re used to them, and when you get new shoes you’re like wtf these are really weird, but then you eventually realise they’re much more comfy and you were just used to the shitty old ones?

New labels can be kind of like that. So like, if u try a label and it feels Weird, ask yourself if the weird is a “this is the wrong shoe size” weird or a “i need to break this shoe in” weird.

Hope I could help you out!! Sending my love, and I hope you find what makes you feel happy and feel like yourself!! Have an amazing day <333