#discourse tw

[i-swear-it-wasnt-memes]

Off of two seconds of googling I found this image on a Reddit thread for celebrities who are quote unquote “unconventionally attractive”

With that said, and this ain’t necessarily a bad thing, but some of y’all spend wayyyyy more time in communities where the ideas of what is attractive is not the same as society at large. Calling Elesh Norn conventionally attractive is insane.

Alright fine, let's do this

(based on this post)

[darci-tbh]

crazy when people are just so blissfully and self righteously unaware of how much it is not sunshine and roses being a trans man. absolutely insane when people say "when has a trans man ever been shunned from a space" "when has a trans man ever had to walk on eggshells for fear of being made an example of" "when has a trans man ever been/had to fear being raped/abused/abandoned/belittled/denied personhood for their transness" ME! me RIGHT HERE in my fucking real life. many many many others too. just because we're constantly silenced and infantalized and erased from the public eye doesn't mean we're not out here suffering. I'm sure it's not the same as the transfem experience. I know for a fact there's a unique kind of suffering in being in the bigots' spotlight. but you can talk loudly and angrily and righteously and exclusively about the mtf experience without slipping in a sly disgusted comment at other trans people or implying that the abuse we go through completely undetected and unacknowledged cannot exist. genuinely. stop fucking generalizing us as all little uwu discord teens with no problems in sight

[nyancrimew]

anyways not doing any further label discourse on here, how u label urself and what a label means to u is entirely up to urself and no one else and anyone who tells u otherwise can shut the fuck up like its not that deep, words inherently just mean what meaning u give to them and theyre words FOR YOU and ABOUT YOU and only u decide what u are.

[actuallyverynormalbtw]

i dont like to talk about self-diagnosis because i dont enjoy people making assumptions about me, my illnesses, and my diagnostic status. but i will say:

i have self diagnosed and gone on to be medically validated with an official diagnosis. multiple times actually. i was never wrong about my self-diagnoses.

however, i have been misdiagnosed by professionals FIVE TIMES. and let me tell you, a professional diagnosis being wrong is far more harmful than a self-diagnosis being wrong.

if your self diagnosis is wrong, maybe you used the wrong language or put yourself in a box or now feel invalid and whatnot. but if your professional diagnosis is wrong, it can lead to abuse, medical trauma, panic attacks, issues with medication, even suicide.

i was misdiagnosed with BPD when i was 15 by a psychologist that i spoke to for hardly even 10 minutes. this diagnosis was based on my parent's description of my reactions to abuse, and the diagnosis was used to validate and excuse their abuse.

i was misdiagnosed with MDD when i was 12 and put through several different types of anti-depressants. we never found anything that worked, because it was actually ADHD and dissociation, but i did end up with panic attacks and insomnia all throughout middle/highschool!

when i self-diagnosed with autism however, it saved my life. it took me out of active suicidality because i was able to finally able to accept myself after years of feeling like i am just "being a person wrong". i had the knowledge to accomodate for myself and the language to advocate for myself. this was life changing. even if i was wrong, which i wasnt, i dont see how it couldve caused any harm.

my opinions on self-diagnoses arent black and white, and im not entirely settled on them either, but i do think this is important to understand. doctors and psychologists are not all knowing. we live in a time where we can access thousands of dollars worth of university level education on the internet, even the same exact resources medical students use. plenty of people are capable of interpreting themselves and that information to come to a conclusion about what they are experiencing and what might help.

sure, self-diagnosis might be biased. but a professional is most likely going to be just as biased, and possibly less aware of it. its just silly to use bias as a primary argument when it is an inescapable feature of human psychology. there is a reason ADHD is underdiagnosed in women. there is a reason anxiety disorders are underdiagnosed in men.

an incorrect self-diagnosis wont take away resources or your space in your comminities. but professional misdiagnosis can cause real damage.

(i am not trying to fear-monger about professional diagnosis, moreso responding to the fear-mongering surrounding self-diagnosis)

[hell-on-sticks]

look I get that it's often important for a person to look for reassurance on whether they are considered disabled or not, I'm not gonna get into that one. What I am going to say is that people need to stop asking "can I say the c slur?". Not how slur reclamation works anyway, and also? Why are you so eager to know if you can say it or not? It's one thing to reclaim it in power, but asking around to get permission from a cpunk blogger to use a slur is unnerving. Stop asking for permission to say slurs and start looking for ways you can participate in and uplift the community they apply to, even if you're a part of it.

[suuho]

the entire problem with this current generation’s mindset of “we don’t need or care for idols to sing live and would rather have a great performance” or a fantasy sold, is that people do not see any value in live singing and do not care about the sincerity of live singing. they do not understand that a live-sung performance can already be a great performance, and it doesn’t need any more than that to be a great performance. they say they would rather have a fantasy conveyed through performance when the entire medium idols are using to do that is song. lyrics set to music. that has to be sung by someone, who should be able to be at least decent at the very skill at the core of their craft. absolutely insane and detached to say there is no need for that in kpop, as if this entire empire is not built around concerts, music show performances, albums and singles.

and don’t get me started on the mindset that no one is allowed to criticize idols, who are doing a very public job, as if you are not allowed to expect someone to be at least passably good at their job? that they have trained for for years? if you are a singer who cannot sing, you are in the wrong profession, point blank. become a variety performer or a tv show host or a model, then. if you are a singer who cannot sing and you refuse to improve yourself, then you are in the wrong profession, and you should not be surprised if people call you out on it.

ten, twelve years ago, groups would have members that would have never been primarily considered as vocalists, and these members would go and put in the work to improve themselves, and learn how to sing. i mean, look at 2pm. they started as a group with a focus on their athletics (with a literal counterpart debuting that was a vocal group, like) and yet, all members have steadily worked to improve as performers, as vocalists. and the hard work has paid off; they literally performed 4 hour long concerts entirely live as recent as last year. because that is part of their job description, and they are aware of that. i would rather take an imperfect but dedicated singer than one who doesn’t try to improve at all. this laziness and coasting on visuals that kpop stans excuse and eat up these days is deteriorating an entire genre, and an insult to the hard work of performers of the past who have done all the work to even allow kpop to become as big as it is now.

[ouchiemyspine]

'cop' is new tumblr buzzword. not everyone u disagree with is a cop. u cant make a 'terf' variation for every group that excludes anyone. words have meaning. the world doesnt revolve around u

[kinnsporsche]

im so sorry but twitter b*ddies will just be like "im not homophobic!!!" and then [echoes alt right sentiment] [spews a take that sounds like its come directly from the mouth of a proud boy] [regurgitates early 2000s homophobia]

[anti-terf-posts]

You're a minor but you're getting involved in adult business. The rights of women everywhere are being taken away and you're helping. You're an evil child.

I'm a feminist broski. also don't you think that maybe the literal adults in power are the ones taking away rights from women? not .... a child on the internet ?

[peachyfnaf]

btw these 3 know about whats going on. and even they're disgusted. now, the VAs have all spoken out about the harassment this group has been receiving from Shattered-Sparks, Biased-TSAMS-confessions and their supporters. The fact that they had to speak out to start with is ridiculous.

Reed’s initial statement defending the victims:

[rexscanonwife]

Honestly I should probably keep my mouth shut on the matter but who gives a shit I'm in a bad mood. The proshipper argument of "fiction doesn't affect reality" is not only untrue, but even if it WAS I personally think it comes down to your PERSONAL morals. Yeah, it's fiction, and yeah I think there's SOME room for nuance in the discourse. but when I see incest/pedophilia on someone's blog my morals and my ethics tells ME that it's fucking wrong and gross to see that shit proudly posted on the internet.

And the fact that you DON'T, tells me we're morally incompatible and I don't want you interacting with me in any way. That's all I need to know about you.

[yb-cringe]

at least i think what helped me the most is that q said point blank; the communication sucks. theres a problem with communication. and i will be fixing it. i am determined to fix it. we have to see if he does it of course but it helps

[nyancrimew]

bi ‘lesbians’ aren’t real :3

what would u do if i threw rocks at you? 🥰🥰🥰

[mangobubbletea7]

I just think it’s crazy to act like this is an MCYT thing. Have you guys heard of what comedians fucking do? How rockstars and other artists have behaved in private? Even in online spaces, are you familiar with what happened in the Smash community?

Y’all we don’t know these people and there is are myriad ways anyone can make very harmful decisions or even just do harmful fuck ups (not referring to Wilbur on the latter, his was a continuous decision over time to engage in gross abuse), it should not be surprising that some of them will not live up to what they should. Yet that doesn’t mean content creation in the streaming genre is uniquely doomed,,,

Some people in positions of power will abuse that power, some will have sought out power specifically for that purpose, simple as.

Doesn’t make it okay, or not worthy of getting angry about, certainly not, but are some of these people just now learning that people we liked can turn out to be bad? Why do you think you have to tear down the community and start over to fix it, or even that that is possible or feasible?

This is how communities have been since the beginning of time, it’s just easier to find out about now that we have the internet and social norms about acceptable treatment of others are stronger thanks to the rise of the left online.

We can understand that something is impossible as a community to fully prevent and still stand against it while not deeming the community beyond repair :|

[pacificwaternymph]

Okay. I don't usually come out and make posts about stuff like this, but I've been seeing it a lot and some of the shit I've seen people post is really pissing me off.

So here's a not-so-gentle reminder that this is about Shubble. This is not about Wilbur, and this is not about you. I am already sick of seeing people lamenting about how sad they are that Wilbur turned out to be a horrible person, or how they have all this Lovejoy merch that they have to get rid of, or debating whether or not it's still okay to support the other members of Lovejoy, and whatever the fuck else. Fucking hell, people, that is not the important part of this!

This is about Shelby. This is about her story, and what she went through. I want to see more posts of people supporting her. I want to see more people watching her content to give her a boost in views. I want everyone to drop Wilbur just like that and not talk about it. Don't give him the fucking time of day.

Because once again, a woman, a victim, has done something really brave and come out and spoke about her trauma, and once again, you all have found a way to make it about the man, about the abuser.

Anyways, if you aren't already subscribed to Shubble, I would totally recommend doing so. She's genuinely a really sweet person and her content is incredibly entertaining.

[mcybree]

If we’re going to have the conversation about how fh is talked about in fandom: the amount of shit i saw in the flower husbands tag that set off alarms in my head before i stopped checking it is astounding. Like. there’s a reason i started primarily beastlife posting i will be so real with you.

The way people talk about toxic fh portrayals on here and toxic relationships in general is not only concerning from a safety perspective but it felt like walking into a party with a big arrow that says “this guy was in a toxic relationship in REAL LIFE!!!” and everyone looks and you and goes ewwww can you be normal. Can you write characters just breaking up normally. Like I dont know man can people read into mcrp without seeing condescending posts in the maintags about it. i could only block so many people bc new guys kept showing up to share their two cents

Like yeah its just mcrp discourse which is inherently unserious but some of those posts were underlined by a misunderstanding of how toxic relationships even work. i cannot stress to you how much “scott loved jimmy so he couldnt have been abusive” is like. reflective of real life beliefs about relationships that are dangerous to have. that is literally the kind of thinking that makes you susceptible to toxic relationships in Real Life. Like yeah we’re just talking about cubes but PLEASE STAY SAFE OUT THERE? It stressed me out for real. Can you kids stop playing with wild dogs in front of me