#and I also have the backbone of a chocolate éclaire so.

[ranger-kellyn]

ALSO I’m just so fucking tired of because I don’t have a partner or kids it’s just assumed that I have all the free time in the world with zero responsibilities or obligations

[a-mossy-amethyst]

Things Malevolent characters would say as John Mulaney quotes:

Arthur:

"I'm really exhausted, and I'm feeling just sort of existencially insane"

"Now we don't have time to unpack all of that"

"[groans] you know, life"

[About John] "My wife is a bitch and I like her so much"

"You know those days where you're like, this might as well happen? Adult life is already so goddamn weird"

"You know how I'm filled with rage?"

John:

"And I said no. You know, like a liar"

"I also don't want me to be doing what I'm doing"

"Do my friends hate me or do I just need to go to sleep?"

[About Oscar] "She's He's not going to do anything else for you. IT'S DONE"

"And my dad Arthur turned around and said, are you going to talk the entire time?"

"Sometimes, people would say, 'what do you think you're doing?' but that just meant 'stop'. They didn't actually want to know my thought process"

Kayne:

"I will pepper in the fact that I am gay"

[At Larson] "Get out of here with your facts. You're like the kid at the sleepover who, after midnight, is like, 'it's tomorrow now'"

[At John] "You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair"

"Crazy people are like that. They have unlimited crazy currency. The things they say mean nothing to them, but they mean everything to me"

"Just cause you're accurate does not mean you're interesting"

"Do you want me to kill that guy for you?"

The Butcher:

"My dad loved us. He just didn't care about our general happiness or self esteem"

Oscar:

[On being a priest] "Which is weird because I'm probably gay based on the way I act and behave and have walked and talked for the past 28 years"

Noel:

"I never talked to my dad about that, but I figured I would tell all of you"

[koreanbibliophilegirl]

(Some incorrect quotes specifically for my dsmp superpower AU)

(Edit: half of the quotes, starting from the 'With great power' one, are from ScatterPatter's Incorrect Quotes Generator!)

-

Purpled: You don't know anything about me!

Niki, who copied Puffy's power and read Purpled's mind, PLUS literally just caught him with a sniper rifle: I know everything about you. You are an open book written for VERY dumb children.

-

Tubbo: How did you find me?

Technoblade, salty he had to leave his library job early to clean up after him: Oh, I saw a huge explosion and wondered, Now who could that be?

-

Quackity: Are you suggesting I occasionally stray from the rule book?

Charlie, cheerfully: No. I'm suggesting you do not own a copy of the rule book, and if you do, you have certainly never opened it.

-

Niki, running on caffeine and three hours of sleep, slightly vibrating, feral look in her eyes: Aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you want to go apesh!t?

-

Skeppy: So what's it like being Purpled's sibling?

Punz: Once I asked him for a glass of water while he was mad at me, and he brought me a glass of ice and said "wait".

-

Ant, who just got back from stabbing another hero: Today is a great day.

Foolish, a hero: Hi!

Ant: My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.

-

Puffy: I'm not mad, just tell me why you had fake IDs.

Clingyduo: *incoherent mumbling*

Puffy: I'm sorry, I can't hear you.

Clingy: You have to be over 18 to hold the puppies at Petco...

Puffy:

-

(When Purpled is 9)

Punz: Why would you give Purpled a knife?!

Skeppy: He felt unsafe.

Punz: Now I feel unsafe!

Skeppy: I'm sorry.

Skeppy: ...Would you like a knife?

-

Purpled, about Tommy: Excuse me sir, that is my emotional support annoying gremlin child with no sense of self-preservation and much trauma.

-

Niki, about Fundy and Jack: Excuse me sir, those are my emotional support overworked & stressed pathetic loserguys.

-

Karl, walking into the kitchen: Babe, is something burning?

Sapnap, leaning against the kitchen counter: Just my burning love for you~ (•3<) <3

Karl: Sap, the toaster is on fire.

-

Eret: Why are you on the floor?

Foolish: I'm overworked and stressed out of my mind.

Foolish: Also I was stabbed, can you get my dad please?

-

Phil: Help me with this crossword puzzle, I need a 6-letter word for "severely lacking in communication skills even while owning a glib tongue and generally amiable demeanor".

Techno: "Wilbur".

Wilbur:

Phil: It fits!

-

George: You're under arrest for attempting to carry five people on a single motorcycle.

Tubbo: Wait.

Eryn: FIVE?!

Purpled, completely deadpan: Tommy fell off.

Glowduo: OH MY GOD, TOMMY FELL OFF.

-

Everyone, to Quackity: You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.

-

Tubbo, carrying a large box: What would you say if I came home with a boxful of vigilante gadget-worthy scrap metal one day?

Alliumduo: ...What's in the box.

Alliumduo: What's in the box Tubbo.

Tubbo: I think you know.

-

Eret: Michael McChill asked me if there was even a remote possibility there's a mole feeding the villain Silver Tongue inside information, and I said "No".

Eret: You know, like a liar.

-

Tina: I'm going to defeat you with the power of friendship!

Tina: And this knife I found!

-

George: With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.

-

Eret: If you can't beat them, dress better than them.

-

Both Ranboo and Fundy, at some point: Turns out the bad vibes I was feeling were actually extreme psychological distress.

-

Schlatt: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.

-

Fundy: Not trying to brag or anything, but I can wake up without an alarm clock now simply due to my crippling and overwhelming anxiety, so...

-

Ponk: I'm gonna need a human skull, and I can't have you ask any questions why.

Kristin: Only if you also don't ask why.

Kristin: (Pulls out 7 pristine human skulls)

Kristin: Take your pick.

Ponk:

Kristin:

Ponk: This one is fine.

-

[Part 2] [Part 3]

[dragongutsixofficial]

THOUGHTS ON EPISODES 7 AND 8:

Episode 7:

RICHELIEU MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW

A Richelieu-centric episode ??? Sign me THE FUCK IN (seriously though he may be my favorite character in the book i'll take any crumbs I can)

Also loved to see him and Milady interacting more !!! Super nice 🖤⚜️

GO APESHIT RICHELIEU

FUCK THE POPE RICHELIEU

In the book (SPOILER ALERT) Milady tells a story very similar to the false testimony she gives in court in order to make Buckingham's right-hand man believe he abducted and raped her and turn him against him- it's really nice to see that referenced in the show

Like to see Louis actually having a personnality

Liked Ninon ! But why would you fall for Athos when ARAMIS IS RIGHT HERE

Also I do think they didn't need her to romance anyone to make her interesting in that episode ? I understand it's the usual plot device but ah well

Love how the last shot of the episode is Constance pining d'Artagnan against a shelf. We all know who's the top in the relationship

To conclude: great episode, did I mention i loved to see more of Richelieu ?

RICHELIEU MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW

Episode 8:

MILADY MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW

Love how the skirt-chasing for money is exactly how it works in the book

Alice (Porthos' love interest) is a pretty good reference to his mistress in the book and a very nice lady but I think the hilarity of Porthos having to deal with her original version would've been amazing (an older woman married to a cupid man who won't spend a dime while they're both just desperately waiting for him to pass to inherit his fortune)

Love how (in the French version at least) d'Artagnan is barely portrayed as actually caring for his farmers' lives, only his cash xD

De Tréville is a good dad

Love d'Artagnan just walking into Richelieu's office like he owns the place

Richelieu is having a mental breakdown

GOOD FOR HIM MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW

But don't be mean to Milady >=(

Milady and Athos being like: love in the air ? Wrong ! Gas leak =D

Mr. Bonacieux is very nice with Constance though. Like I would not have reacted that well

Also nice to see him working for Richelieu. The people who made this show clearly dearly care for the book

d'Artagnan getting promoted !!! Yeah =D now he's got the cool shoulder pad

d'Artagnan in the book 5000000000% wants Milady and does still a dude's identity for the second time in order to essentially rape her though so it's nice to see d'artagnan having a moral backbone more solid than that of a chocolate éclair

So uh. I do think Aramis took his own sword back from his ex's grave

Btw in French at least right before they start the duel d'artagnan says something like "speaking from personal experience, never trust in love" and Athos gives him a dramatic side eye. This can be explained in two ways: 1- he relates 2- d'artagnan YOU'RE SAYING THAT IN FRONT OF YOUR POLYCULE

Also once Alice dumps Porthos in the French version him and Aramis have an exchange that's like "So you're not gonna marry her" "Who would take care of you if I did" and I love them

Before he gets dumped, Porthos also says something to the effect of "there's a life after being a musketeer" to shut Aramis' criticism down. Boy don't give him ideas. If this was book! Aramis he'd take it to heart have an existential crisis lock himself in a room for weeks and whip himself crying about how he's gonna become a cleric

Edit: fixed a typo from Milady and Porthos to Milady and Athos

[queer-cosette]

Monster High as John Mulaney quotes

Frankie: My vibe is like, "hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I’ll apologise to you."

Draculaura: I’m one of the worst drivers I’ve ever seen, and I just want you all to know that if you’re ever on the highway behind me, uh, I hear you honking and I also don’t want me to be doing what I’m doing.

Clawdeen: Like, when my dad and I would talk, it was like that scene in the movie Heat, when Robert De Niro and Al Pacino sit down in that diner. We kind of had that rapport of, like, “Hmm, we’re not so different, you and I. You have your law practice, and me, I have all these fucking markers.”

Cleo: And without looking up at me, my dad just said, “You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.”

Lagoona: Ah! One feels like a duck splashing around in all this wet! And when one feels like a duck, one is happy!

Ghoulia: It was so beautiful today that I only watched four hours of ‘Law & Order’ in my apartment.

Abbey: Why do people shush animals? They've never spoken!

Spectra: Was there ever even a ghost, Mother, or was the dead Victorian girl you saw just me all along?

Deuce: I would never say that, not even as a joke, that my wife is a bitch and I don’t like her. That is not true. My wife is a bitch and I like her so much.

Clawd: My wife and I walk around New York City pushing our French bulldog in a stroller, and it’s a big stroller and it has a big black hood. And people lean in to see the baby. And instead they see a gargoyle breathing like Chris Christie. Her paws are sweating. We’re like, “He’s sick.”

Heath: This is an on-fire garbage can. Could be a nursery.

Jackson: Late at night, on the street, women will see me as a threat. That is funny, yeah! It’s kind of flattering in its own way, but at the same time, it’s weird because, like, I’m still afraid of being kidnapped.

Holt: I ran into the laundry room and I jumped on the washing machine and I crawled out through a window into the backyard, and now I'm running through the backyard and there's this big chain-linked fence and I thought "I've never climbed a fence that high before!" and then I woke up at home.

Gil: Now, I was raised Catholic. I don’t know if you can tell that from the everything about me.

Slo Mo: It’s fun to be married. I’ve never been supervised before. I’m supervised. She studies what I do. Like an anthropologist. She’ll be like, “Sometimes, he will watch a movie on TV even though he already owns that movie on DVD. Pointing this out to him confuses and upsets him.”

Manny: I will keep all my emotions right here, and then one day I'll die.

Toralei: Sometimes, people would say, “What do you think you’re doing?” But that just meant “Stop.” They didn’t actually wanna know my thought process. They didn’t want me to be like, “Well, I was gonna put this bottle rocket into this carton of eggs, so that when I lit off the bottle rocket, the eggs would explode everywhere.”

Meowlody: And he shows me a tiny room that is covered wall to wall in stolen antique photos from different people’s parties over the years. And I said “Why? Why do you do this?” and Alex said “Cause it’s the one thing you can’t replace.”

Purrsephone: Just too anxious for a lot of things, I get nervous all the time, not even about like major life things, just about like everyday situations. Like this is my regular speaking voice, but if I’m in a pubic bathroom and someone knocks too suddenly on the door or stall door, I go into a whole different speaking voice. Which is “Eh, someone’s in hereee. Someone’s in hereee.” so they’re gonna be like “I think there is a carnival barker in there. I think someone’s trying to drum up business for a carnival.”

Robecca: Everything was slower back in the old days ’cause they didn’t have enough to do, so they had to slow things down to fill the time. I don’t know if you read history, but back then people would wake up and go, “God, it’s the old times.”

Venus: Oh! Hey! Would you like, like an old turnip we found in the cabinet? Would that be good for you? Would you like that?

Rochelle: [French accent] “Oh, the things I have seen, you cocksucker. You have no idea. The Gestapo threw my printing press into a river. But, go, tell your fucking jokes. Bring me my dish.”

Operetta: I'm really sorry about last night, it's just that I'm mean and loud. It will probably happen again.

Howleen: We started chanting, McDonald’s, McDonald’s, McDonald’s! And my dad pulled into the drive thru, and we started cheering and then he ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving.

Twyla: In terms of like, instant relief, cancelling plans is like heroin.

Nefera: We want a gift! But only if it's MONEY!

[homicidal-toothpaste]

Batman villains as John Mulaney quotes:

Joker: He could look at a child and guess the price of their coffin

Riddler: You’re like the kid at the sleepover who, after midnight, is like, ‘It’s tomorrow now.’ Get out of here with your technicalities. Just because you’re accurate doesn’t mean you’re interesting.

Penguin: You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.

Scarecrow: It’s nice when you’re nervous and everybody’s like, 'Yeah, you should be nervous.'

Catwoman: as long as you weren't still there when the police arrived, you had a 99% chance of getting away with it

Harleyquin: Girl Scout cookies are delicious! They come in Thin Mint and Samoa and also other flavors. How come I have to know a child in a beret to order them? Just sell me the cookies. I have American money. Just put them in a store and I'll buy them.

Poison ivy: Now I get to say, 'my wife' which is very exciting. It has a lot of power to it. It's fun to say 'my wife'. I'm looking forward to saying it a lot. 'Get away from my wife!' 'No one talks to my wife!' 'I didn't kill my wife!

Ra's Al Ghul: I don't look older, I just look worse.

Two face: It was so beautiful today that I only watched four hours of 'Law & Order' in my apartment

Red hood: For those of you who don't know what it is, blackout drinking is when your brain goes to sleep, but your body gets all 'Eye of the Tiger' and soldiers on.

[gutz-radio]

🏀 Ravenbrooks High Basketball Team 🏀

Hello, you guys remember Ruben and Seth? You know those guys who didn't even have speaking lines in Waking Nightmares? Well I made a gang for my AU with them and some other characters who were also in the book but so unimportant only their names were mentioned. The only gang member missing here is Enzo because he left the gang later in the story, though he's still on the team. Anyway enjoy Highschool bullies and some info on them below.

👟 Ruben Mariano Smith: Leader 👟

Ruben Mariano Smith is the Leader of the gang and the Team Captain, and is in 11th Grade despite being 19 due to being held back a few classes for failing. He's incredibly aggressive and rude, and can be violent as it doesn't take much to provoke him. Ruben's parents are divorced and he mainly lives with his father, Officer Keith Smith, only living with his mother and stepdad during the weekends. His favourite bands are Beastie Boys, Metallica, Mötley Crüe and KISS.

📏 Seth Jenkins 📏

Seth Jenkins is a troubled boy in 11th Grade (he failed only one grade and had to repeat), and most of his classmates are disturbed by his strange behaviours. He likes to carry a jar around with him, and he'll fill it with dead bugs and spiders (some of which he likes to eat). He lives with his Aunt and younger cousin, due to him not having his parents around anymore. His favourite bands/artists are Soft Cell, Queen, and Elton John (though his favourite song is Easy Lover by Philip Bailey).

🎽 James Kinsman 🎽

James Kinsman is mostly an annoying selfish brat with a moral backbone of a chocolate éclair (ha-). He likes to do pranks and will talk at length about how cool he is or how much money his family has (the "well my dad is a" type). His parents are quite wealthy, and so he's become very spoiled. His favourite bands/artists are Bon Jovi, The Beach Boys, and Billy Idol.

💈 Jake Louis 💈

Jake Louis is in 11th Grade, and the best way to describe him is that his dental hygiene is as good as his grades. He is the very definition of a class clown and constantly smells like shitty deodorant and cigarettes. His parents own a small Italian restaurant, which is where he usually gets his food from. His favourite bands/artists are Pixies, A-ha, Billy Idol, Ricky Nelson, and Queen.

🎸 Collin Kyong Jones 🎸

Collin Kyong Jones is the only 12th Grader on the team, and is the most intelligent and sensible member on the team, though most are intimidated by his height and size. He lives in a stable home, and mostly hangs around the gang due to his friendship with Jake and Ruben, since he's known them from a young age. His favourite bands/artists are Talking Heads, The Beastie Boys, Metallica, The Clash, and Queen.

[rpmemes-galore]

John Mulaney Quotes   {Sentence Starters}

“That’s illegal.”

“And that’s my WIFE!”

“This is the height of luxury!”

“Your opinion doesn’t matter.”

“Shut up! You’re all gonna die!“

“Why?...Why do you do this…?“

“I’m new in town and it gets worse.“

“I lived like a goddamn ninja turtle.”

“Oh, we’re gonna freak out so bad.”

“I don’t look older, I just look worse.“

“You know how I’m filled with rage?”

“I need everyone to like me so much!”

“Eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs.“

“I will pepper in the fact that I am gay.”

“And I said ‘no’... You know, like a liar.”

“Adult life is already so goddamn weird.“

“First off, get out of here with your facts.”

“I think I can get them to budge, let’s go.”

“No! That’s the thing I’m sensitive about!”

“I just wanna sit here and feed my birds.“

“We were little goblins. We were terrible.”

“Now, we don't have time to unpack all that.“

“Because it's the one thing you can't replace.“

“I was just shiny, and dumb, and easy to trick.”

“I also don’t want me to be doing what I’m doing.“

“You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.“

“Brush your teeth, now BOOM, orange juice! That’s life.”

“Why do people shush animals? They’ve never spoken.”

“ I’m so horny and angry all the time, and I have no outlet.“

“That’s what I thought you’d say, you dumb fucking horse.”

“She’s a dynamite bitch and she’s the best. She’s my hero.“

“In terms of like, instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin.”

“Whoa! That tall child looks terrible! Get some rest, tall child!”

“We started chanting, ‘McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's!‘“

“I’ll keep all my emotions right here. And then, one day, I’ll die.“

“Then he ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving.“

“Anyone who's seen my dick and met my parents needs to die.”

“Just ‘cause you’re accurate does not mean you’re interesting...”

“I look back on being 17 and think, 'Oh my God, how did I not die?'”

“You are never too young to learn our national ‘no snitching’ policy.“

“You know those days when you’re like ‘this might as well happen’?”

“Something happened here. You hope it’s a miracle, but probably not.“

“Sometimes babies will point at me, and I don’t care for that shit at all.“

“And apparently I grabbed it, drank all of it, and said, ‘It’s perfume.’ And it was.“

“I try to stay optimistic... even though, I will admit, things are getting pretty sticky.”

“I never knew relationships were supposed to make you feel better about yourself.“

“It is 100% easier not to do things than to do them, and so much fun not to do them.”

“And everyone else joined in. A hundred drunk, white children yelling ‘fuck da police’!”

“I have a lot of stories about being a kid because it was the last time I was interesting.“

“My vibe is like, ‘hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I’ll apologize to you’.”

“I am very small and I have no money... so, you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.”

“The more you do stuff, the better you get at dealing with how you still fail at it a lot of the time.”

“They terrify me to this day because 8th graders will make fun of you but in an accurate way.“

“I quit drinking because I used to drink too much... then I would black out and I would ruin parties.”

“If you’re comparing the badness of two words and you won’t even say one of them, that’s the worse word.”

“College was like a four-year game show called ‘Do My Friends Hate Me or Do I Just Need To Go To Sleep?’“

“Hey, do you want me to kill that guy for you? Because it sounds like he sucks, and I will totally kill that guy for you.”

“I was always the squarest person in the cool room, and alternatively, sometimes the weirder person at the mainstream table.“

[tendous-fingertape]

I don't know if Mcyt matchups are open or if I can request them but yeah,,,you don't have too do this-

°I'm a minor

°I'm somewhat chaotic but I can be serious at times, I also give great advise

°I have lots of energy but I'm very awkward at first

°I love coffee

°I'm a leo, I also like cats and ferrets, I love Greek mythology and I'm a digital artist

°I'm really short, I have brown eyes and waist long dark brown hair,,

°I know Spanish and English and currently learning french and also learning a bit of chess!starting to think I'm a bit of a overachiever not gonna lie,,,

°i wear oversized hoodies all the time unless I'm going outside then I'd wear like grunge mixed with dark academia and tech wear(a mess I know)

°im very stubborn, and I like to be sarcastic at times, my favorite comedian is John mulaney "I have the backbone of a chocolate éclair!"

°my sleep schedule is very awkward I can sleep at a normal time, but I can also pull all nighters without feeling tired if that makes any sense??

°i'm like a hopeless romantic if a guy is nice is someway I will just crush on them or like think about the gesture so much,,, I'm also loyal to a fault

°i also love making handmade gifts for people!

Also I really love you page!! <3 :D

Thank you so much!! Sorry it took me so long, I went out with my family today!

Request are opened matchups are closed!

Minors get romantic ships with minors

I ship you with Tubbo!

Vey loud

lots of screaming

likes to kiss the top of your head

it makes him feel like, and i quote, a big man

teach him Spanish 

please

we wants too so bad

sometimes doesnt know when youre being serious or not

loves john mulaney!

you guys sit down all the time and watch his standup!

tries to help you with your sleep schedule

overall so cute and blushy!

[mysticalmusicwhispers]

WSKFJEKGJ indus Not Approving of yao is BRILLIANT also i am not a dog person but also not a being mean to animals person so i am not sure how to feel about the poor dog... still it is exactly what they would do (and then poor indus has to deal with yao being invited over repeatedly after this visit. f. if they do something too stupid he's going to be banned and there will be the additional chaos of sneaking him in.... )

YEP i don't think baby yao has much pity for anyone let alone himself and he also doesn't know what fear means. also OH NO NYO CHINA AS HIS GUARDIAN. OH N O the thing is that nyo china is probably working/worked either in finance or as some sort of private tutor for like 25 subjects for students over the world because she's brilliant... but that means like long or irregular hours and probably a lot of time out of the country... which means that yao has so much time (and money, via a fat allowance) to go F E R A L. also you KNOW she wouldn't discipline him even if she had the time. she'd just be like go baby! kids will be kids! i'll use my money to scrub your bullshit from your records! as long as you get good grades and keep yourself fed you are a-OK! she also has the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair and negative 10 parenting skills. and yao obviously follows this example of "if you have enough money/power you are Above The Law, you can ignore any laws you think are stupid". which uhh cultivates his ambition and discipline in academics, so i guess at least she didn't fail there??? she would be such a terrible parent/guardian omg i think both 2p and 2p nyo china are better parents/guardians who can actually instill but NO of course it HAD to be her

also thank you for the book rec when i get back home i'll read it!

SNEAKING HIM IN AKSJDKS also yeah india is like “haha you suggested I invite him now he’s Excited!! I have to keep inviting him, or else I’ll lose my friend!” *puppy dog eyes*. F in the chat for Indus. Also lol yeah I’m not a dog person either but I think it would be one of those small yappy dogs because they are not very intimidating but very annoying. Yao dislikes it for whatever mysterious reason and they somehow manage to get it to wash itself in a bucket of water with pink hair dye, and then lock itself outside the neighbor’s house. Unfortunately the neighbor has a security camera and things get out of hand from there. Idk what would get him banned but I honestly don’t think it would take much lmao, Indus is already at her limit with the first stunt...

Also YES to finance/tutor nyo China! I love that she travels a lot and is just that sort of absent but also pretty cool guardian who facetimes her ward (or whatever) and says “Ill bring you (insert souvenir/traditional snacks) from (insert country here) when I get back. Did you do all your homework? What have you been eating? Mhmm.... ok! You seem to be holding up fine, I have a call from a client right now so I have to hang up.” (Yao usually has his hw done and even if he answers he just ate snacks and like 1 proper meal at a friend’s house it’ll probably satisfy nyo china). YES TO THE FAT ALLOWANCE and the too-much leniency.... FFFFFFFFFF in the chat for every single classmate of Yao’s and their parents. IMAGINE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SHE GOES TO MEET THE TEACHER ON TEACHER PARENT NIGHT lmaooo all Yao’s classmates are scared of her but all his classmates’ parents are giving nyo China the evil eye (but simultaneously being a little bit scared of this woman who has ended up raising a feral child) sksksksks kinda hilarious. Yao and nyo China are just in their own little familial dynamic while everyone else is trying to stay as far away as possible from them lol. And yeah lol, I was gonna have her either be Yao’s adult cousin or aunt (like idk mid 20s (23 would probably be the youngest) to early 30s or something) so she’s just vibing by herself and then gets a child, says “oh well, I guess I can take him” and literally is just his provider of food and shelter but not much else. Yao is fine with that though because his Independence is strong lol

[dayables]

how about ranboo for the character ask? + maybe wilbur afterwards if you have time?

Sure :D 

Ranboo: 

What I think are their biggest strengths: 

Probably his dedication to people over sides. Like yeah, I know he has the spine of a chocolate éclair. I get it, but he isn’t swayed very easily. You can get him to do shit, but if he disagrees, he continues to disagree with you. (please tell me that made sense)

 What I think are their biggest flaws;

The chocolate éclair spine. It’s all well and good to stick to your beliefs but please grow a backbone and stand up for it. PLEASE. 

In what ways do they make me soft/what I find endearing about them;

Grass blocks :D. Grass blocks :D Grass Blocks :D Grass blocks :D Gras-

What are my favorite things that the cc does acting wise to portray them;

So hahaha, i haven’t  actually watched that much Ranboo lore- I umm... I don’t do well with vods and there’s nearly 0 videos I could find on Manberg up too when I finally followed him. I. I really should look for that.

What arc would I like to see involving them;

YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU KNOW WHAT. 

I want to see enderwalk Ranboo and Dream team up, without manipulation. I think it’d be really cool to see just how it could have gone had Ranboo never heard of literally everything shit Dream did. 

BUT I ALSO REALLY WANT TO SEE A PRISON BREAK-IN WITH BENCH TRIO AND LIKE, ALL THE FEELINSG THERE. SOS AHAHAHAHAAAaaaaaa.  Wilbur: 

What I think are their biggest strengths;

His ability to speak his way out of most things, Words over weapons as an ideology really worked for Wilbur because he was a wizard with words and it made up for what he lacked in PvP

What I think are their biggest flaws;

Where he placed his identity and the sudden loss of it, creating a loss of identity? Wilbur lost a lot in his spiral. I’m fairly certain cc!Wilbur said in his podcast that a lot of who Wilbur was revolved around L’manberg. I think that was his biggest flaw. I don’t know. c!Wilburs so damn complex major props to c!Wilbur analysts. 

In what ways do they make me soft/what I find endearing about them;

Popping into calls when there’s been an argument (normally Tubbo and Tommy’s) and trying to keep a general peace during his time as president.ngewufu

What are my favorite things that the cc does acting wise to portray them;

Never wearing armour. In both peacetime and wartime. Once because he believed peace and trust, and then because of lack of care. 

What arc would I like to see involving them;

I want a resurrection. I don’t care if he blows the SMP up, is redeemed or is already good and it's all a  plot or is just a funky eldritch horror who creeps people out and plays solitaire (lies, I really want the last one). I just want him back.

[appendingfic]

Trollhunters Characters as John Mulaney Quotes

Jim: It's nice when you're nervous and everybody's like, "Yeah, you should be nervous." Because a lot of times you're anxious and people say, "Relax. Shut up." And that just feels like, Well, I guess I'm also crazy.

Barbara: Some people give off a vibe of...Right away, they're like, "Do not fuck with me".

Strickler: This is an on fire garbage can.

Otto: 13-year-olds are the meanest people in the world. They terrify me to this because 8th graders will make fun of you but in an accurate way. They will get to the thing that you don't like about you. They don't even have to look at you for long. They'll just be like 'Ha, ha, ha, ha hey look at the high waisted man. He got feminine hips' And I'm like 'No! That's the thing I'm sensitive about'.

Dictatious: You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.

Steve: I'm really sorry about last night, it's just that I'm mean and loud.

Nomura: Just explain to me this: how are you better than a Nazi?

Blinky: And you replied, "Hey, do you want me to kill that guy for you?"

Claire: You know those days when you're like, "This might as well happen?"

Shannon: I will pepper in the fact that I am gay.

Darci: 'cause you know how you lie to your parents.

Morgana: And I didn't know her well enough to be like, "Hey! What kind of a person are you?"

Aaarrgghh: My vibe is like, hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I’ll apologize to you.

Bular: My dad loved us, he just didn’t care about our general happiness or self-esteem.

Gunmar: Okay, let's go over there and destroy the place.

Toby: I look back on being 17 and think, 'Oh my God, how did I not die?

Eli: You can do good work simply staying up all night and eating nothing but junk food, but probably not in the long term.

Not Enrique: I am very small and I have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.

Merlin: I'm new in town and it gets worse.

Draal: I'll keep all my emotions right here. And then one day I'll die.

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

I've been listening to THATW on your recommendation & loving it. Battle Cries keeps getting stuck in my head and I was curious about your take on the lyrics. To me, especially coming at the end of the album, it seems like maybe it's about growing apart & realising that's for the best rather than being sad ("this isn't a breakup dear heart, it's a season finale") or maybe the singers are at the end of their lives & facing that end to their relationship? I'd love to hear your thoughts/analysis.

Me: GUYS I’M DOING ANOTHER TAD SONG ANALYSIS

My Friends: You have the backbone of a chocolate éclair.

Please keep in mind as I go down this rabbit hole conduct this analysis that art is what you interpret it to be. So whatever it means to you is a valid interpretation, and this is just my own take on it. Here is my ranting analysis of Farewell Wanderlust, for those of you who are wondering why this lovely person is trusting me, a certified feral bastard, with literary discussion.

That dealt with, that’s tackle the three layers of analysis here. Yes, I said three. Buckle up buttercups.

(Listen if a joke is funny the first time it’s funny every time.)

Okay, so level one: analysis separate from any other piece of work. This is where you look at the art (in this case song lyrics) and examine it purely on its own merit, not by looking at background or connection to other texts. If we just look at the lyrics, what do they say and what do they mean?

PART THE FIRST

Unlike Marbles, which tells us a very easy-to-follow story of a relationship, even giving us a handy-dandy year of meeting (I’ve held your hand since 1979), Battle Cries doesn’t give us solid details to fix on. We have to fill in the blanks a lot, which is obviously deliberate given that Marbles and Little Miss Why So (from their previous album Love Run) have shown us that the band knows how to be specific and grounding in telling us a story. If they’ve left things abstract, it’s on purpose.

From the very first lyric, we’re shown two people at odds, as they sing wildly different words:

“I’m at the brink, don’t laugh,

at the winks I’ve masked.”

vs.

“The wrinkles and bricks that we’re left with at last,”

They’re even singing at a different pace from one another. The man is more upbeat, faster, and his notes go up and down. The woman is slower, more deliberate, and her notes are closer together. This pattern continues through the song - the man is all over the scale and moves faster, the woman is slower and her voice stays even.

The central conflict here seems to be over the singers differing on what they feel is important, culminating in, “we were gods” vs “we were kids.” We have references to specific events where the signers acknowledge that they understand one another, even if they don’t agree:

“You’ve a knack For applause from the back of the stalls but you lack The conviction to look at me straight and say yes”

vs

“Some fictions we took to mean fate believe me I know”

and

“Tell the truth to me love, does my hair look as nice As it did when you once tied it up in your eyes? Look at me as you say this, don’t look at your phone.”

There are continued references to things that they’ve done, such as “but we sunk into water...” and “our devils broke ranks, and out of the depths came an army.” They’ve been through a lot together, these two people, and most of it is metaphorical, you assume... but there’s also the theme of playing pretend, making believe, with repeated references to devils, kings, monsters, pirates, and all the rest. The line between fiction and reality is blurred strongly here, as we’ve seen in their other songs like That Unwanted Animal.

The woman appears to be a performer, since the man sings that she “dragged us along to watch all of your shows.” The man could be a performer, but he refused: “and by God, love, believe me, I wanted to play, too, I did.”

The lyrics the woman sings imply that she throws herself into things wholeheartedly while the man holds himself back - which has become a problem, given the lyrics they’re singing at each other. This is ironic because the woman’s lyrics might imply that, but her voice is the more deliberate and grounded one, while the man, the one singing the lyrics that imply holding himself back, is the one with his voice jumping all over the place.

The woman embraces her power and lack of restraint and proclaims we were gods. The man acknowledges that they were young and lost and didn’t know what they were doing, reminding her we were kids.

And both of them are right.

They’re also both constantly trying to counsel each other. A good moment that highlights their differing views is here:

Done with your dreams, they won’t last Thirty winters will pass, you’ll look back at the woman fifty year old you will be proud to have known.

vs

Cos that sun that beams down as my hands touch the grass After summers of fasting I feel hunger at last For the person fifteen year old me would be proud to have known.

One of them is putting aside dreams, and looking towards the future and saying, I want to be someone that future me is proud of.

The other, however, is focusing on how they feel in the present moment, on how they feel alive (this lyric of feeling hunger at last is also possibly a callback to Wild Blue Yonder’s “tried my best to get thinner” and Farewell Wanderlust’s “when your mom says ‘you look healthy’ but you know she means you got fat”) and saying, I want to be someone my teenage self would admire.

This also highlights how the woman seems detached from reality. She’s all about make-believe, dreams, the future. The man is more focused on the here and now, the past, what was and what is. And again, neither person is wrong here. But their differences are bringing them into conflict as seen from different lyrics and rhythms.

But there is, however, a lack of goodbye. The lyrics show an understanding of one another, and there are moments where they share the same lyrics. The line, “this isn’t a break up, dear heart, it’s a season finale” is very telling because it’s a season finale.

Season vs. series, real quick - series means the entire end of a show. Not coming back. It’s the final ending. But season? That just means it’s time for a break. We’ll be back. It’s a conclusion of an arc but not the conclusion of a story.

So the couple isn’t saying goodbye forever. They’re just saying this is the end of one arc. One part of the story. And now we’re taking a pause, and then we’re going to tell the rest, be the rest, presumably together. Especially because just previous to this the woman said she’s not leaving without a fight, and the man said he’s not going to let her turn their last night into this. They’re not going to be gone from each other forever.

In fact, one could (if one was so inclined) call this one of the fights that the couple from Marbles had. Both songs have a very similar feel to them. So you could very well view it that way. This isn’t a look at the story of an entire relationship, this is a look at one specific part of it. And again, this isn’t a painful breakup song. We see that in the chorus:

But that breathing you hear don't mistake it for sighs, Don’t you realize - They’re just battle cries, dear. And these lines aren’t wrinkles, dear heart. (Hardly knew the words) They’re just dollops of paint on a new work of art! (I’m dolled up love don’t I deserve to just) And as I walk away I know, I’ve been through the wars, But that creaking you hear in my bones is not pain, it’s applause.

There’s no pain. There’s no sighing. No screams. Not wrinkles for age. There’s an embracing of it all, a joy found in things that might otherwise cause sadness. It’s saying don’t worry, this is all good. But there’s nothing about goodbye, it’s more “look at what I’ve been through and I’m glad of it, I’m okay with it.”

I also think it’s telling that the song ends with just one singer performing.

All it took to unearth in the dust and the dirt Some release or respite from the heat and the hurt Was taking the time now and then to ask how I am And now at the end, at the end of all things, I’m not going to scream, beat my chest at the wind, I’m doing fine.

That’s a callback to The Rockrose and the Thistle, both lyrically and in how the singer’s performing it (his voice is almost exactly the same, quick, someone compare the musical notes for me).

Basically, yes, there is a sense of something ending, but it’s not The End. The end of university was not the end of your life. The end of childhood was not an end to your life. And so on. It feels more like the end of a phase - both in this couple’s relationship (but again, season finale, I don’t think it’s the end of their relationship completely) - and in their lives. They’re phasing out of a certain stage. But the lyrics say explicitly “this isn’t a breakup” and we need to trust that.

I think, looking at these lyrics, that Battle Cries is about facing the end of a certain period of your life, whatever that period is, and embracing both the frustrating and the wonderful about it, and looking at both your own flaws and the flaws of your partner, and maybe needing to take a break - but knowing that it’s not the end, and that you’re going to be okay. It’s about self-reflection as well as reflecting on a relationship. It’s taking a small step back and observing yourself from a slight distance. Getting philosophical with a bottle of wine.

Basically this feels like the end of act two, not the end of the entire play. Does that make sense? Am I making sense to anyone?

However, that is just the FIRST LAYER of analysis. There are two more. Because just one layer of meaning would be too simple, apparently, for a certain British bastard. Not naming names here, mostly because I don’t need to, we all know what life-ruining motherfucker I’m referring to.

So, the second level here is not Battle Cries as a song on its own, but Battle Cries as the final song on an album.

PART THE SECOND

The Amazing Devil did this with their previous album, Love Run, as well. They’re fond of using the first song as an introduction that lulls you into a false sense of security and using the final song as not just a culmination of all the other songs on the album but as a callback. Not Yet/Love Run on the same-titled album contains direct lyrics from the previous songs embedded into the background, and also serves as an emotional crescendo of all that the previous songs in the album were touching on (mainly depression, romantic relationships, and ‘what the fuck am I supposed to do now’).

With Battle Cries, we get the same thing.

First and easiest is double lyrics that sometimes conflict. We saw this in Wild Blue Yonder most predominantly, where the man was being the more dramatic of the two and the woman was kind of talking him down and being more pragmatic. Even though there’s not as much conflict in their lyrics as in Pruning Shears from Love Run, that conflict is still there - and is done, again, in Battle Cries.

There are also smaller, more specific lyrical callbacks:

“And these plates they smash like waves” = That Unwanted Animal (and these plates they smash like waves/throw the plate at the wall)

“And the wine stains hide the tears” = Farewell Wanderlust (but like rubbing wine stains into rugs it’s my curse, to try and make it right, but by trying make it worse)

“The wrinkles and bricks we’re left with at last” - Marbles (your eyes aren’t rivers there to weep but a place for crows to rest their feet) and Wild Blue Yonder (every brick you hurled I’ll use to build)

“But that creaking you hear in my bones is not pain, it’s applause” = That Unwanted Animal (and if we join our hands in prayer enough to God I imagine it all starts to sound like applause)

Aside from these direct lyrical callbacks, there’s the emotional tone.

In the very first song on the album, The Rockrose and the Thistle, we have the theme of helping someone - someone who might not necessarily be good at accepting your help. The lyrics, however brief, give the impression of night (when you call to me asleep) and a foreboding seaside (up the ragged cliffs I scramble).

In Battle Cries, we once again get lyrics that give us the impression of the seaside, through allusions to pirates (more on that in the third section). But instead of nighttime, and danger, the lyrics give us the impression of light and warmth:

“Now the wind is so warm on the back of my neck As I walk with the sun hand in hand from the wreck”

Wreck, again, suggests a shipwreck (most other acts of destruction we call crashes i.e. car crash, ‘wreck’ is almost exclusively used for ships) which suggests the ocean. But in TR&TT all is dark and uncertain, and it’s told from the point of view of the helper, who is trying to assist someone who’s struggling. In Battle Cries, we go from darkness to light, and it’s the point of view of the person being helped, saying that all they needed to feel better was having someone take “the time now and then to ask how I am.” We’ve gone full circle.

That final bit could also be a callback to Welly Boots, where the singer talks of someone “screaming far too loud to hear me swear” and running out into an impending thunderstorm. In Battle Cries, the line is,

“I’m not gonna scream, beat my chest at the wind. I’m doing fine.”

Again, a POV shift from a previous song to no longer be the person sung about, but the person doing the singing, and no longer in a position of distress, but a position of acceptance and moving forward.

Also if someone who like actually can talk about music as opposed to just lyrics could help me the fuck out here I know there are musical similarities between The Horror and the Wild and Battle Cries, and I’m pretty sure between Marbles and Battle Cries too, but I still can’t fucking read music and once described a note in a song to a friend as, “it sounds too Idina Menzel and you need to make it sound more Florence Welch” and so I am not the person to be discussing this but I FUCKIN’ KNOW THE SIMILARITIES ARE THERE I CAN FEEL IT I JUST DON’T HAVE THE ABILITY TO ARTICULATE IT.

Anyway.

So, Battle Cries is not only a standalone work but a culmination of the emotional journey that the album has taken you on. You’ve moved through songs about needing help and being unable to receive it/seeing someone you love needing help and being unable to give it (TR&TT, Welly Boots), songs about hiding from your demons and having a fun time being in a sexual relationship with someone you have to say goodbye to and move on from and while we’re at it let’s say “fuck it” (Wild Blue Yonder), to screaming about our failures and how people have failed us (Farewell Wanderlust, Welly Boots), to more sex and oh let’s throw spirituality and God in there (That Unwanted Animal), going full-on feral and taking on all comers (THATW) and then finding joy and the profound in the little moments with those we love without censorship or rose-colored glasses (Fair, Marbles).

Battle Cries is bittersweet not only because of its standalone lyrics but because it is embracing the bitter, wild fury of certain songs in the album and the sweet, soft love of the other songs. It’s combining them. And then, in its final moments, it’s taking a deep breath and releasing it all: “I’m doing fine.”

The band clearly chooses, with extreme care, the order in which their songs are to be played. While certain songs like Wild Blue Yonder and Pruning Shears could very well be the kind of songs you hear on the radio, and all the songs are good as standalones, there is an extra layer of emotional depth when you listen to them in the order the band intended. The number one thing people tell me when they listen to TAD for the first time is, “I get a musical feel. It reminds me of a particular kind of musical.” I’ve gotten a lot of comparisons to Hadestown, which, fun fact, started not as a musical but as a concept album in 2010. And I think that’s because people are picking up on the fact that the entire album is a journey that the listener is carefully being led on, and the final song draws it all together in a bittersweet, triumphant end note.

Not Yet/Love Run at the end of their last album did the same thing, which brings me to my final level of analysis: Battle Cries as the spiritual successor of Not Yet/Love Run.

PART THE THIRD

The first and most obvious comparison is the lyrics. In Not Yet, we have a theme of fighting an enemy and playing make-believe, being pirates:

“Sing me awake with a song about pirates,” “you point I’ll steer and we’ll rip up the map by the seems,” “it’s time to fight don’t be yellow bellied, hold the bar at Hurley's hurly burly's give ‘em hell give ‘em hell.”

In Battle Cries we have much the same thing:

“���Come at me you blaggards’, you’d yell from the banks Wielding words against make-believe wizards and tanks”

There is a lyrical theme of pirate-speak and make believe, playing games. (In fact the next line in Battle Cries is “and by God, love, believe me, I wanted to play, too, I did,” referencing both playing make-believe and playing music.)

Not Yet and Battle Cries both blur the line between what is real and what is pretend, with the woman singer being much more willing to throw herself into imagination and the man being more cautious, more realistic. Both feature the woman in a fighting mood (“where is God, ma?”/“I won’t leave without a fight”) and the man more grounded and accepting (“I held your hand as you shook in the middle of the night”/“I’m not gonna scream, beat my chest at the wind”).

And both times, in both songs, both singers have a point. Neither one is fully right or wrong. That fighting spirit in the woman in good, but so is the acceptance and grounded attitude of the man.

Both Not Yet and Battle Cries also have the lyrical dance, where the man and woman sing different lyrics that overlap, and then occasionally come together and sing the same thing. It’s moments of understanding in between moments of disparity, which, really, isn’t that what every relationship is like? You’re never going to be in sync with your lover, friend, family member, all the time. But when you do come together, it’s fantastic.

Not Yet/Love Run is basically two songs in one, and so the Love Run portion is separate from the Not Yet portion in my analysis. Love Run is about fighting, but not fighting to get away from something, not fighting out of anger, but running towards something and fighting for love. There is, in Love Run, an acceptance that things can be shit, but we’re gonna keep running anyway:

“It’s not from what we run that drums, but what’s to come,” “run to show that love’s worth running to,” “though some would harm you, none, not one, no none, would raise to you, a hand nor thumb, not while by you I stand and hum.”

In Battle Cries, we get a similar acceptance and a reaffirmation that love, care, and compassion are what keeps us going:

“And as I walk away I know I’ve been through the wars, But that creaking you hear in my bones is not pain, it’s applause,”

“All it took to unearth in the dust and the dirt, Some release or respite from the heat and the hurt, Was taking the time now and then to ask how I am.”

Both Love Run and Battle Cries take the lyrics of their previous songs in the album and rework them, echo them, and then stand tall and say, “but it’s going to be okay, dear heart.” And Battle Cries emotionally and lyrically deliberately echoes Not Yet earlier on in its lyrics, and then emotionally (though not quite as lyrically) deliberately echoes Love Run at its end.

I could keep going on the details of this but this is fuckin’ long enough already and you all are smart people with an insane amount of time on your hands thanks to quarantine so I’m sure you guys can extrapolate further from here. Battle Cries plays the same role in THATW that Not Yet/Love Run plays in LR, therefore, there is a thematic and emotional similarity between both songs, therefore, lyrical comparisons and callbacks to Not Yet/Love Run were placed in Battle Cries.

IN CONCLUSION

This song is operating on three levels. It’s operating as a standalone piece of work, it’s operating as the culmination of a collection of work, and it’s operating as a successor/callback to the final piece in a previous collection of work by the same artists.

You’re going to find themes in the work of every artist, conscious and unconscious. I can tell you right now that my original novels have a strong theme of dreaming - dreams as power, dreams as prophecy, dreams as manifestation of our fears and our subconscious, dreams as escapism. It’s a theme I at first did subconsciously and now, as a writer with a better sense of self-awareness, one that I utilize consciously.

Good artists recognize their personal themes and turn them into leitmotifs. They harness what they’re already subconsciously expressing and wield it as a tool. It takes a very skilled artist to take those themes and use them the way TAD does with all of their work but especially with Battle Cries. There is a deliberate awareness of what they’re doing and the words they’re wielding. Battle Cries is an ending that knows it’s an ending in the best kind of way, one that says not all endings are bad, here, let us show you.

And that’s what makes it so brilliant.

[ramblingsofachristiannerd]

for roa'nev: crimson imperial sandstone safety coral white shadow black

ROA’NEV 

thanks for the ask haha. i love him but he is. shady as heck xd

(haha trick me into giving away some of my plot? Yeah you got me; plot details ahead because I couldn’t avoid them in order to answer these questions adequately XD)

Crimson: have you ever been in a war? If so, describe how it impacted you

- Roa’nev is the first of the four to go to war, and he excels at it. He’s smart, ruthless, independent, and devoted to securing freedom for all people. However, as the war goes on, as he’s obstructed by bureaucracy again and again, as more and more people die, he becomes cold. He never loses sight of the lives he set out to defend, but he has fewer qualms about shady methods that protect those lives, i.e. drawing on the power of the dark side. He doesn’t let himself feel anything; he can’t afford to. Every decision he makes is born out of icy pragmatism, pure logic. He’s also using an alias and wearing a mask that hides his features; it bothers him more than he lets on that everybody sees him as this great leader and warrior, the mighty Revan. He becomes his mask, and he feels like he can’t afford not to be – Revan is the identity he chose, and the one the people need. It’s not a very healthy coping mechanism, but it’s also not the end of his character development; he does reach a healthier place eventually.

Imperial: are you in any position of power or authority?

- He’s the Supreme Commander of the Republic military during the war. He goes to war without the official sanction of the Jedi Council, but a lot of Jedi like Malak and Meetra join him anyway. Revan doesn’t particularly like or want to lead, he just knows that he’s objectively good at it, and that this is the surest way to get things done. He is a fair, charismatic, and inspiring leader, and his men trust him completely, but the pressure wears on him more than he lets on.

Sandstone: who in your life has been the most healing for you?  

- Definitely Bastila. She cares about him as a person, not a symbol; she didn’t want to follow him, she wanted to help him, and she saw under his mask to his true wants and feelings. She helped him pick up the shattered pieces of his life when he wasn’t sure who he was supposed to be, and her endless faith in him helped him heal. She’s never shielded him from the consequences of his actions, but she’s always been a staunch defender of his right to a second chance. Their relationship is healthy because he helps her with her own issues, and they don’t feel like they owe each other for it; they just want to help the other because they’re worth it and they care about each other.

Safety: what is the most traumatic experience in your life?

- Poor Revan’s got a shopping list to choose from, but it’s probably the loss of his memories towards the end of the war. He’s a deeply independent and self-sufficient person, and the knowledge that there’s whole parts of his life that he doesn’t remember – and that he will never truly be able to tell if he got them all back – really disturbs him. He lost memories of people he cared about, some of whom were no longer alive, as well as his logic behind certain decisions, and the loss and uncertainty really get to him sometimes. He had everyone telling him about all these great or horrible things he did, and he doesn’t remember why he did them; he’s sick of being compared to the person he was before. Even though it’s a temporary experience, he was straight up not having a good time for pretty much all of it.

Coral: do you have a strong moral code? What are some moral things that you feel strongly about?  

- Revan is a bit of a conundrum in that he actually has a fairly strong moral code, but also the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair. He believes very strongly in certain ideals, but is willing to do some pretty shady stuff to fulfill them, and is very much a classical anti-hero in that sense. But strongest of all, he believes that everybody should be free to live they life they choose; he treats everybody equally regardless of status, and he will fight to ensure that everybody is free.

White: would you consider yourself a good person? What’s the best thing you’ve ever done for somebody?

- He doesn’t particularly consider himself a good person, but he’s not one to wallow in either self-pity or self-hatred. He’s objective enough to know that he has helped a lot of people, and that he’s making real effort to improve himself and be a better person. The one thing he’s unambiguously proud of is liberating the slaves on Taris. He regrets a lot of things, but never that.

Shadow: what is your biggest regret?

- He has a lot, but his biggest will always be his treatment of Malak during the war. Revan relied on his friend heavily during the fighting, and ended up taking advantage of his support to enable them to do some pretty nasty stuff, sometimes intentionally. Revan tapped into the dark side during the war, and because he didn’t want to be alone, he encouraged Malak to do the same, which. Does not end well for them. He hates that Malak also paid the price for what Revan sees as his own mistakes, and he doesn’t think he’ll ever stop feeling awful about it, even though Malak forgives him.

Black: what is the darkest thing you’ve ever done?

- Revan regrets a lot from the war, but how cold and manipulative he got really bothers him. See the above; the cruelty of essentially becoming Malak’s enabler, taking advantage of his anger and abandonment issues – something Revan didn’t watch or let happen, but directly did – is probably the darkest thing he’s ever done. Malak forgives him, but if there’s anything Revan hates himself for, it’s that, especially as he really does love his friend, and did it anyway. He certainly gets his comeuppance though, and it’s a behavior he intentionally never does again. 

[intoxicatiing]

@starlyht​ sent:  “You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.“ -fox

John Mulaney Starters || Accepting still tbh!

That struck deeper than expected -- perhaps because he was right, but also perhaps because it was a notably unique comparison. She might have been compared to pastries and candies before, but not for her morals. Few people were so creative when insulting those.

But Fox wasn’t the first man to have seen through her, and he wouldn’t be the last. So she offered him a smile, just as always, and shakes her head. “Hm. I wouldn’t say that.” Truth told, it made her nervous to be seen for what she was -- a liar and a coward. A schemer who capitulated to anything she was told to. 

There was one main issue with his statement, however. “An eclair, at least, is always sweet.” 

[elkshed]

the bartimaeus trilogy as john mulaney quotes

john mandrake: you know those days when you’re just like, this might as well happen? adult life is already so goddamn weird.

kitty: oh, well, thank you for asking. you know how i’m filled with rage?

bartimaeus: and then, for back story, i will pepper in the fact that i am gay.

nathaniel: i’ll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day i’ll die.

ptolemy: everyone get outta my way. i just wanna sit here and feed my birds.

the resistance: S T R E E T S M A R T S

jessica whitwell: in fact, we’re gonna frame you for murder! and you’re gonna go to jail for thirty years!

queezle: some people just give off a vibe of like, right away, they’re like, “do not fuck with me".

quentin makepeace: and i know now that i’m definitely never gonna be president. not unless everyone gets real cool about a bunch of stuff really quickly.

arthur underwood: you have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.

the bearded mercenary: he made his living in murder. he was the weirdest goddamn person i ever saw in my entire life. he was a man most acquainted with misery.

sholto pinn: remember, mr finch, at five o’clock you need to keep looking like a hard-boiled egg.

faquarl/mr. hopkins: i am now gross. i am damp all the time… i don’t think it’s anything serious, but isn’t it, though?

nouda/makepeace: i don’t know what my body is for, other than just taking my head from room to room.

jenkins: i mean, imagine you’re me - you’re a 22-year-old temp, and you’re so hungover, and you just wanna die every day. and then that happens in front of you, and i don’t know, gives you hope?

harold button: so i put on a sweater and a pair of corduroy pants, and i felt safe. 

ALSO john mandrake: i was hoping by now that i would look older, but it didn’t happen. i don’t look older, i just look worse, i think. honestly, when i’m walking down the street, no one’s ever like, “hey, look at that man!” i think they’re just like, “woah! that tall child looks terrible! get some rest, tall child! you can’t keep burning the candle at both ends!”