#and “he looks good out there he moves the puck well... kind of the same type of player that monty was”

[ratatatastic]

"i dont know [a. boqvist] looks good out there i think he moves the puck well... kind of the same type of player that monty was" THIS JUST IN MIKKSY BRINGING UP HIS EX WHILE BEING FORCED TO TALK ABOUT THE NEW KID ON THE BLOCK. ALL ARE DEVASTATED.

Training Camp 24 | 10.2.24 (x)

[puckhq]

You took for granted seeds we planted when we were young || CLUSTERFUCK 2.0

tagging: Eva Anderson ( @anderseva ), Morgan Weston ( @morgan-weston ), Santana Lopez ( @psusantana ), Jake Puckerman ( @puckjake ), Bree Brown ( @blckbarbree ) & Noah Puckerman

date & time: October 30, 2024 at night

location: Bree's fancy ass apartment

warnings: mentions of alcohol

summary: And here we go again. Another clusterfuck for Jake's video roll on his phone. Santana, Bree and Jake all worked together to get the Throuple in one place to finally talk their shit out. Except some truths are revealed and now things might be worse than ever. Communication is hard.

word count: 5,808

MORGAN hadn’t known it was Jake’s birthday until mid-afternoon, when a text had come through on his phone, while he was elbow-deep in horse grooming, inviting him over for drinks at Bree’s place. Seven hours later, Morgan stood outside the apartment, clutching a gift-wrapped box. When he’d found out about Jake’s birthday, he felt a small pang of guilt - he probably should’ve known. Jake was dating Bree, and Bree had become like a sister to him; and not to forget about the fact that Jake was actually Puck’s half-brother. Not that that mattered right now, even if Morgan tried his best to make it matter. So, Morgan had scrambled to the nearest bike shop and picked out a pair of leather gloves - good ones, sturdy but soft, the kind that felt broken in the moment they were slipped on. The gloves weren’t anything grand, but they’d pair nicely with the motorcycle Morgan had gifted Jake not too long ago. When the door opened, Morgan smiled softly. “I couldn’t show up empty-handed, could I?” He said, first thing and held up the present.

JAKE was still wrapping his mind around practically cutting his mom off for the time being, but with his birthday finally here, he could finally put all of that behind him. Him and Bree still needed to deal with their own mess but for the sake of his brother's current situation, he'd happily agreed to his girl's plan to get the throuple together, and then Santana had jumped on board as well. Getting Puck to Bree's place for what he thought was a chill dinner was simple, and the same had happened with Morgan. He let Bree handle getting Eva there, and once the show was set to start, Santana had made up a reason to get Puck out of the living room area once someone knocked on the door. Once the coast was clear, Jake walked over and opened up the door, and he was surprised to see him with a gift. "Dude, you already gave me your bike, that was present enough." He smiled as he stepped aside after taking the gift bag from the man. "Come on in. Dinner is just about to start, but that's Bree's forte." He pointed out before glancing around behind him to look for his girlfriend. "Bree?"

BREE was fully aware this was probably a terrible idea. However, Eva was her favorite woman, pretty much ever, Morgan was a friend and Puck was basically her brother-in-law. An it did not sit right with her that these two men weren't being as forthcoming with Eva as they needed to be, as she deserved and apparently it was worth pissing her Professor, PR team manager, and friend(?) off to give them an opportunity to say what needed to be said. As she made sure the catered meal was warm and ready to eat, she heard her name being called. Coming into view of Jake and Morgan, she smiled at her boyfriend, while scanning the area, glad to see it looked like Santana had moved her and Puck somewhere else. "Yes, hi, come in." She smiled, and all but pushed Morgan to the kitchen.

PUCK unwillingly followed Santana into another room. Looked like a spare bedroom and he was realizing that Bree was like, rich rich. Which he knew, but he'd never really seen. Not like he would recognize luxury brand clothing or whatever. Looking a the mother of his child he furrowed his eyebrows. "Now why exactly did you want me alone in a bedroom? You know we don't have to have sex if you wanna have another one of my kids." He smiled at his own joke.

SANTANA rolled her eyes at Puck's words. "First of all, don't insult me. I threatened, and then bribed, the hospital so as soon as I pushed Maya out, my tubes were tied. That was the first and only baby that will ever come outta this body." She pointed out. "But I wanted you alone to remind you that I care about you, and I owe you the world for everything you've done for Maya, so just keep that in mind when you find out what your brother, your future sister in law, and I set up." That should have been enough of a hint as to what was coming, but it was also Puck so she wasn't sure if he'd catch onto that.

JAKE had to bite back a chuckle as Morgan was pushed into the kitchen by Bree, but then he followed anyways. "We should probalby start eating, and get out some drinks — the good stuff — right now." He suggested, since he wasn't sure if Puck would end up hearing Morgan's voice and come out of the bedroom yet.

MORGAN shrugged and gave a small smile. "That bike was given to you as a 'thank you' for that time on campus," he started, but continuing almost made him wince at the memory and the pain it had left behind. He stepped into the room, and let the topic go, instead greeting Bree with a warm smile and a small wave. He hadn't seen her since the morning after their drunken night that he didn't remember a thing of, and in a weird way, it felt kind of comforting to be her and Jake's third wheel in this situation. "D'ya need a hand or anythin'?" He asked, slightly confused about being pushed into the kitchen, but figured it was because he probably had to help out. "The good stuff? What good stuff, man? Y'know, I'm drivin' tonight, so I can't go as crazy as Bree and I did a few days ago."

JAKE decided not to comment on the reason why he'd gotten the bike, since he was sure that the classroom fiasco contributed to why the throuple was in the position they were in now, and instead just focused on the fact that he wanted to get some food before the show started. "Don't worry, we've got it." He suggested, and they did mostly, since Santana had practically laid out the fine china dinnerware, the utensils, the cups, etc. The Latina had been rather dedicated to helping Bree get everything laid out just in case this shit went downhill fast. Jake was piling food onto a plate for himself when he heard a knock at the door, and knowing it could only be one person, he put the plate down in front of Morgan. "Babe, pour the wine." He called out as he jogged over and opened up the door for Eva.

EVA had been expecting this to just be a chill night in with Bree, so she was dressed down and completely unprepared when it was little Puckerman opening the door instead. "Why are you here?" She asked before just walking past Jake, and the aroma of food coming from the kitchen led her straight in that direction until she spotted Morgan. "Bree Bianca Brown, what the fuck is this?" She huffed, already annoyed at this little ambush.

BREE really wasn't listening to anything anyone was saying. Instead, she was attuned to that front door and waiting for that fateful knock. Sooner than she was ready there it was. Popping open a bottle of good winne she poured herself a glass and chugged it. Hearing her full government named, she looked at Morgan, "If you'll excuse me." Then she went to the front door. met with a very unamused Eva. "Before you get mad, just remember I'm on your side."

PUCK wasn't surprised Santana managed to get her tubes tied so early in life. A bad ass through and through and he was glad that their daughter seemed to inheriet so much from her. Even if it did cause some challenges from time to time."Yeah, okay, not sure what that's got to do with Jake's birthday dinner. I mean, I already knew y'all set that up." Before he ould even have another thought, he heard a voice ring out through this big ass apartment and he'd know that voice anywhere. Without even looking back at Santana he just left the room and followed where the voice came from until he was face to face with Eva. Looking at his brother, he was starting to put the pieces together. "The fuck is going on?"

MORGAN watched as Jake started scooping food onto the plate, and he was about to speak up when there was a knock on the door. Morgan was pretty sure he'd been the only one invited tonight, for whatever reason, but maybe a family member was coming over? Or a close friend? Either way, Morgan quietly grabbed the plate as Jake exited the room, and just continued to scoop the food up, figuring that Jake wouldn't mind. It wasn't until he heard that familiar voice that he looked up, seeing Eva on the opposite of the kitchen island. "I-" he wasn't allowed to finish his sentence when the door opened again and Puck was stood right there, next to Eva. "This- I'm-...I was invited!" He quickly tried to reason, wanting them to know he hadn't planned for this. Sure, he was trying to win them back, but this wasn't on his list of ways.

EVA could only roll her eyes as Puck walked out next, and then she didn't even need Morgan to defend himself because she could already tell that Bree and Jake had set this up. Or at least she had assumed it was just them until she spotted Santana walking down the hall next, and now it really made sense. "Just so we're all clear, the last little ambush didn't go so well, so why are we doing this again?"

SANTANA didn't really get the confusion on the throuple's faces, or their lack of appreciation for the hard work that had gone into tricking all three of them like this, but she wasn't gonna stand for it either. "It's too late to yell this out, but surprise! Yes, all three of you were unaware that this was happening and yes, the three of us did set this up because we care about all of you. If any of you wanna fight about it, I'm down, but I'd advise you not to." She sassed with a grin. "Now, sit your asses down and talk." Was she demanding it? Yes. The only one who might fight her back on it was Eva, that much she knew, so she didn't even say anything else as she walked over and grabbed her hand, shoving her over on the couch. "Jake, you're guarding the door. Bree, get the wine. Puck and Morgan, both of you fucked up, again, so it's only fair that one of you start."

JAKE didn't know why Santana was always bossing everyone around, but he wasn't stupid enough to disobey a direct order from her either so he grabbed a chair from the dining room and placed it in front of the door. "Since it is my birthday, can someone get me a plate before the show starts?" He teased, sitting down in the chair and taking his phone out to record this, since he knew it would come in handy later.

BREE was glad that Santana was there, because even Bree can admit, Eva would have walked out, maybe Puck and Morgan too and all of this would have been for nothing. So she did as she was told and went to get the wine. Very good wine, that she knew for a fact was Eva's favorite. So she looked at Jake before she went to go get wine glasses and fill up two decanters.

PUCK kind of wanted to just leave, but it was his brother's birthday and Santana wasn't to be fucked with. So he sat down, not next to Eva and watched as Bree came in with the glasses and wine and he found himself struggling to look at Morgan right now. All of this didn't even feel real and he needed a minute for his brain to boot back up. "Can I get water or something?" He asked Bree, he was trying not to drink anymore. It was one of the many things he was obtaining from for the time being.

MORGAN was as confused as he always was - except maybe just slightly more than usual. The last time this had happened, it had not gone down well, and Morgan knew better than to try and talk to Puck and Eva, while there were other people there. But Santana was intimidating and he didn't know what she'd do if he just jumped out of the kitchen window, so he just slowly followed the group into the living room with the plate of food in hand. He decided to place his tall body in the doorway between the living room and dining room, so he could watch everything unfold from there. Puck refusing alcohol was an incredibly welcomed sight, and it warmed his heart, his eyes softening as he stared a little bit too long at him. But then he snapped out of it and he figured it'd be best to maybe speak up, since he was the one who'd last done everyone wrong anyway. "So- err...you both look good." He said, eyes darting between Eva and Puck.

SANTANA wasn't gonna let Bree serve everybody herself, since she probably was the most foreign to such out of the women in the room, so she got up and grabbed a plate of food for Jake. It was the least they could do since they had jacked whatever birthday plans he could have had with Bree. And busying herself was the only way to keep her from not slapping both Morgan and Puck in the back of their heads for being idiots, so she didn't even mind it this one time. But as soon as Morgan finally opened up his mouth to greet them, that urge increased. "Well, that's not how I'd greet people I claim to love after I royally fuck some shit up, but sure, Weston. Nice opening." She stated sarcastically, handing Jake his plate and a glass of wine before she went back for her own.

EVA could have left now, and she wasn't afraid of Santana so she'd fight her way out of here if she had to, but this was the first time she'd seen Puck since finding out what he'd done in lockdown. While dumbass #1 had tried to love bomb her since she'd last seen him, dumbass #2 hadn't so much as said a single word to her since she'd cried in his arms, and that horrifying moment alone called for some ounce of accountability on his part. "I always look good." She tossed at Morgan without even looking his way as her eyes were trained on Puck...for now. "Since we're clearly not getting out of this, let's skip the bullshit. Noah, what did you do during lockdown? Better yet, who did you do, and before you think about lying, he already ratted you out so your best bet is to just be honest."

PUCK could feel Eva's eyes on him and he was rebooted enough to know that he better look back. Probably the least he could do since he hadn't reached out to her since she cried on his shoulder. Which he now understands was also a dick move. And selfish and definitely not the actions of a man who loves her, so when she started asking about lockdown, it wasn't until she mentioned him telling her that he even realized she already knew. Fucking, Morgan. Couldn't even give Puck the ability to tell Eva himself. He decided to talk to Eva first and then deal with Morgan after. Look at that, him thinking, what an improvement. Thankfully, Bree came back with a water and he thanked her before chugging half the bottle. "On day four of the lockdown I got shit faced, had sex with some chick, kept drinking, then punched a wall. That's how I hurt my hand. I should have told you myself. Even if I didn't tell you that day we talked. I should have reached out and I should have told you the truth, instead of making excuses to justify not talking to you yet. I'm sorry for what I did during lockdown. I'm sorry for not telling you about it myself. I'm sorry for not reaching out and for ghosting you again." Now, Puck wanted to immediately throw Morgan under the bus but he wanted to Give him the opportunity he robbed Puck of to tell Eva himself and he wanted to get Eva the space to process what he said and say whatever she needed to say in return. He wasn't perfect and he knew he had a lot to answer for but he was trying.

MORGAN watched Santana, eyes squinting a little at her comment and he was about to speak up when Eva decided to go straight for Puck's throat, calling out his lack of communication. Morgan didn't even know about that part. To a certain degree, he was happy he'd told Eva, even if it wasn't his place to do so. He didn't know if Puck had planned on talking to her about it or not, but there was constantly that nagging in the back of his head, bringin him back into the classroom to be taught about Communications 101, and surely, telling Eva these things was a part of the curriculum, right? On the other hand, he could see how wrong it was too. This was Puck's story to tell, and so once the other man stopped, Morgan gave Jake his plate, leaving the man with two plates full of food now, and he stepped forward. "I'm sorry, too. Everything that I said those days; things came out so wrong. But I thought y'all deserved that kind of communication from me, y'know?"

EVA wasn't surprised that Puck had the sense to just come clean now, and she appreciated his little apology but it was too late for that too. She'd already told him once before about the ghosting, which he had a habit of doing whenever he'd fucked something up, and that should have been the first red flag that caused her to be done with this. Yet she'd ignored that one, and some others, so here they were. She didn't even need to process it since Morgan had given her the rundown of the important shit anyways, so she was about to brush off the apology until Morgan stepped towards them and uttered one of his own. That earned him an eye roll. "I'm pretty sure nothing came out wrong, Morgan." Everything he said had been crystal clear, in her opinion, so she didn't know why he was inserting himself into this right now. Turning her attention back to Puck, she shrugged. "I get how shitty your dad was, and how everything he's said and done has probably fucked you up, but that can't constantly be your excuse for why you make shitty decisions. Morgan and I both agreed on that when he told me what you did, and honestly, fuck you for letting me cry and be vulnerable and not having the balls to just be honest. That's a dick move." She huffed.

PUCK simply nodded at her words. Even though they stung, he had also been prepared to have his apology not accepted or have it be too little too late. While he was working on a larger apology to give her, his therapist and support group members had all made it clear that sometimes things are too far gone, but that doesn't mean you don't apologize. Because the apology isn't to fix it or get what you want. You apologize because you did something wrong, period. "Yes it is. I recently learned that even if you can explain it that will never excuse shitty behavior." Now that he'd said that, he could focus on Morgan and his lack of confession. Maybe he'd already told Eva, but something told him he hadn't. I mean would he have bothered telling Puck if he hadn't said he talked to Serena? Probably not. "I am wondering what kind of explanation he gave you" He looked at Eva. "-for why he fucked Serena probably fifteen minutes after whatever conversation he had with you about me." Puck still wasn't willing to look at Morgan, and he was being messy and he shouldn't have said it, because Morgan should have told her but fuck him. All the shit he gave Puck for his shitty coping mechanisms, to turn around and reveal his whole fucking secret relationship with Serena, still made his blood boil.

BREE gasped in her seat next to Jake. "Morgan." She said with heavy disappointment in her voice. She hadn't seen that one coming.

EVA didn't know how he'd come to this conclusion, but she was sure that either his mom or someone with some sort of qualifications had gotten him there. He sure as hell hadn't figured that out on his own, and she would have been proud of him for it if she wasn't mad at him. But when he started to turn the focus on Morgan and mentioned an explanation from him, she was slightly confused since Morgan had told her he didn't know what his feelings for that little punk were. And she was still pissed at him too, but when Puck revealed the new information, she was almost positive that her blood had never boiled like it was now. She also hadn't known that the man could hurt her any worse than he already had, but boy was she fucking wrong. "You fucking asshole." She hissed as she finally turned to Morgan. "You looked me right in my face and gave me that whole speech about your stupid heart tying into knots when you're with us, how losing us — or me or him or whatever — would be the biggest mistake of your life, and how I was the fucking one just to go fuck her immediately after that?" Eva hissed as she glared at him, and she didn't even know how she was fighting back tears right now but she sure as hell wasn't about to let him see her cry ever again.

SANTANA was thankful that she had refilled her glass because all of these revelations were too much, even for her, and she hated that things were this bad. Gulping down the full contents of her glass, she was now annoyed because Eva was clearly too good for them. But it also took a bitch to know a bitch, and she could see right through Eva's tough exterior and knew she was on the verge of tears. As if there were ever a time to step in, it was now. "Jake, turn the camera off." She stated before she glanced between the two idiots. "If there were ever a time for you two to be actual men for once, it's now. She should walk out of here and never look back, so you might wanna say whatever you need to say before she does."

JAKE nodded and quickly turned the camera off, and even he was baffled at this now. And as much as he loved his brother, he couldn't exactly support him and Morgan repeatedly hurting someone who obviously didn't deserve it. "Just so we're clear, this is the last time I'll be involved in setting you three up. I thought I was bad but damn, you two don't even deserve her."

MORGAN looked between Eva and Puck, feeling his brows furrow as he listened to Eva come for Puck and his actions. Was it true? Yes. Did she have to tell him that harshly? Morgan's heart hurt, wanting to step in and cradle Puck's face into his chest, but he also wanted to kiss Eva's lips so hard, because the way she was taking control turned him on like crazy. Gulping, Morgan was about to step in, choosing to defend Puck, but then he was interrupted before he could even say a word, and the other man decided to completely throw him under the bus. Everything that he hadn't yet told Eva, because he was playing the balancing game of making her miss him, before confessing about his wrong-doing. His eyes looking between the two started panicking, and his ears started ringing, and Bree's disappointed 'Morgan' was fuzzy in his brain. But then Eva spoke up, and it was like his ears snapped back, her voice crystal clear and he gulped hard. It was like he had this little voice inside his head, constantly doubting whatever he was going to say next. "I can explain!" 'Can you?' "It's all a big misunderstanding!" 'Is it?' "I didn't mean any of it!" 'Didn't you?' "Can you guys just shut up for a second?!" He finally snapped, his voice loud, and it was mostly directed to the voices in his head, but he turned to Santana and Jake. Looking back at Puck and Eva, he took a step forward and ran a hand through his beard. "Listen. I had sex with Serena, after our lunch, Eva," he started, trying to calmly explain what had happened. "I didn't do it to hurt you, you have to believe that! I had invited her over, so that we could get things cleared up and so I could move on, and focus on the two of you. I don't know what happened, it's like everything became blurry after that, because I wasn't thinking. About anything. And I should've." He sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "I can't take it back now, but my mind's never been clearer. I meant what I said. I only want you two."

EVA honestly didn't need to hear shit else at this point, since Morgan crossing that line after their last conversation only solidified everything she'd said before. In fact, her mind her never been more made up than it was now. But when he raised his voice at them, both her and Santana made the exact same face, and she could tell the Latina was about to knock him upside his fucking head, just as she wanted to, but she waved her off dismissively. The last thing he needed was both of them about to throw hands, and she was sure that the odds had never been more in their favor. Just like the last time she'd seen him, there was more bullshit excuses coming her way, and she didn't hesitate to roll her eyes as he spoke. The audacity of him to come for Puck's excuse when he kept finding them for his actions too. Waiting until he was finished, she shook her head. "Right, so instead of doing like I told you to do and telling her what you told me, you fucked her? It didn't just happen because you weren't thinking, Morgan. You did it because you wanted to." That realization alone was enough to make her crack, but somehow, by some miracle, she held back her tears. For now. "Just like I said before, you both keep saying how you want this, how you're so sure of it now, but you both had to fuck someone else to be sure. I didn't. And honestly, all this proved was that even if we tried to do this, the second shit goes south or we have one fight, both of you are just gonna go stick your dicks in whatever hole gives you some attention. I deserve a lot better than that." Eva didn't really know what else she was even supposed to say now without repeating herself, so she stood back up and glanced between them. "I can't do this anymore, so I'm done. For good this time. You two can do whatever the fuck you want, but leave me out of it. I let both of you hurt me twice now, and I'll be damned if you do it ever again, so just stay away from me. Is that clear?"

MORGAN watched as Eva told him everything; everything that he'd done to fuck this up. She was coming for him, calling him out, and honestly, it was the truth. Morgan might've been dumb, but he could see exactly what she was saying, and it made sense to him. He had had sex with Serena because he'd wanted to, he had gone and stuck his dick in someone else, after a fight with Eva. And if anything, this just proved to him more that he needed to become a better man. That he needed to prove himself more. That this wasn't the end. If anything, it only made his desire for them stronger. "Eva..." he watched her stand up, wanting to say something, but not knowing what exactly. He needed his usual 3-4 business days to figure out what exactly he could do or say, in order to make any of this better.

PUCK could see the turmoil in Morgan, the realization that he was wrong, had been wrong but the fight to tell yourself you didn't mean it, that it wasn't you intention. That you weren't that guy because in your head you'd never treat someone you care about the way you're realizing you did. And Puck knew that's what was happening in his head because it's exactly what happened in his for weeks. listened while Eva spoke. Said everything Puck and Morgan deserved to hear. As everyone's voices filled his head, he felt a rage build up in him at Morgan, at himself too, but at Morgan more, but he was trying to decide if he had the right to say anything. Thankfully, Eva had plenty to say, to them both. All of it hurt but all of it true and when she said she couldn't do it anyone, he realized he had already accepted this outcome. Accepted that unless there was real change, provable change, in Morgan and Puck's coping mechanisms and behaviors, unless Eva had the time and the space to process and heal and rebuild herself, this was always going to end up here. For the first time, he finally understood why his mother told him as a child not to hold on so tight you squeeze the life out of what you're trying to hang on to. Nothing can grow in those conditions. While he had so much he needed to say to Eva he knew he couldn't say it now and even if he could she likely wouldn't hear it. So he simply turned to her and let his heart break as he looked at her, knowing the pain he caused. "I get it, and you're right, about all of it and imma stay away from you. I'll do everything I can to keep us from crossing paths again, not on campus, not anywhere." It hurt to say but it was the least he could do. Now, he needed to say something to Morgan and he wasn't all the way sure how. Getting up, he faced his- not his, cowboy, "She was my friend and you knew that. You could've picked anyone, but you picked my friend. Losing you and Eva is what I deserve, it's what I earned but Serena? I didn't earn that loss. And neither one of you cared enough about me to- to..." He trailed off, just staring at Morgan. Finally he looked away an at Santana, Bree and Jake. "Can I go?" He asked the three who set this up.

EVA honestly just needed to get out of here, get some air, and to move the fuck on from both of them. Morgan having nothing to say other than her name proved that he had nothing left to say right now, which made sense considering that he'd probably just run right back to Serena after this. And the Puck started talking and she didn't care what he had to say either. "Great, good to know you can commit to something." She muttered before she headed for the door, and Jake quickly jumped up and moved out of the way so she could leave.

SANTANA sighed as Eva left, and while the plan had gone off the rails, she had switched sides and was only rooting for Eva now. Well, she was rooting for Puck to get better and work through his shit, but romantically, she only cared about the woman in this throuple. Downing some more wine, she nodded at Puck's question. "Yeah, it's fine. I think you've said everything you needed to get off of your chest too, so no need to stay any longer." Not that he needed permission at this point anyways, but he had asked so she gave it to him.

JAKE wasn't for beating a dead horse so with Eva and now Puck being done, he was giving up on this throuple thing too. "Well, thank you both for coming anyways. And thank you for my birthday gifts. Sorry this didn't work out like we planned, but...good luck in whatever, or whoever, you do next, I guess?" He rambled, since he wasn't really sure what else to say. "I'll see you around, Morgan."

MORGAN's face resembled that of a kicked puppy, not knowing how to make any of this better. The way he'd not only ruined his relationship with Eva and Puck now, but he'd also come between Puck and Serena, knowing how the two were such good friends; at least that's what he figured based off of the fact that he'd caught him in her apartment that one time. But a part of him was screaming that this could be resolved. If he was stubborn enough; persistent enough. He loved them for crying out loud! He wasn't going to give up on them just yet. As he watched Eva leave, followed by Puck, Morgan sighed, and rubbed his temple in pure frustration. He had to think now, come up with something else, because he was pretty sure he'd cleaned out every single poppy and sunflower field in California in order to send them that crazy amount of flowers, so that wasn't an option until they'd grown back again. He had to think about his next move. What was the way to someone's heart? ... Eyes opening wide, Morgan looked at the three on-lookers and gave them an optimistic smile. "This was great, you guys, we should really do it again some other time, but I need to go, I have something- I have several things I gotta take care of." And with that, he ran out of the house, knowing exactly where to head next: his kitchen.

[fckinwild-kiwi]

Dec. 17th: Ice Skating

Day 17: Shared Hobbies/Conversations at 3 am

Day seventeen of @comp-lady’s Domestic December writing challenge has arrived!

Warnings: Swearing (This is an 18+ blog, minors dni)  Word Counts: 0.7k+ Words Pairings: Steve Harrington x Reader

“Hey, Y/n,” Dustin called from Steve’s kitchen. “Do you wanna play D&D with us next week?”

“I think I’d be free,” I called back.

Steve recoiled as he jumped off the couch. “Since when did you play Dungeons and Dragons?”

“She’s been playing with us since before you, Steve,” Dustin said as he came back into the living room. Steve looked between the two of you, confusion still plastered across his face. 

“I’m sure you have hobbies that she doesn’t know about too,” Dustin said as he rolled his eyes. 

“Well, I like to sing sometimes,” Steve whispered, looking at the ground.

“I’m not sure what’s happening right now,” I said, looking between the two boys who were having a weird nonverbal argument. “Stevie, baby, I know you like to sing. I hear you in the shower every night, it’s beautiful. I enjoy playing D&D sometimes. Why are you both being defensive?”

“The kids made a comment about us earlier this week,” Steve said, looking up to make eye contact. 

“That’s not quite what happened,” Dustin said, crossing his arms as he prepared to start going in on Steve. “We asked him what you two like to do together and he said that you guys couldn’t be bothered with any of the ‘kid’ hobbies.”

“What are ‘kid’ hobbies, Stevie?”

“I just meant-“

“I know what you meant, Steve,” Dustin said, rolling his eyes again. “But it was rude, and it hurt my feelings. I’m not a child and you don’t have to enjoy doing everything I do but you don’t get to make me feel bad about them.”

“Steven,” I said as I stood up and wrapped my arms around Dustin’s shoulders. 

“Look Henderson, I’m sorry,” Steve said, sitting back down on the couch. “I was insecure. Shit excuse but that’s what it was.  You guys have these hobbies that you love and can do as a group. I don’t have anything like that and of course, instead of asking to join I just lashed out...”

“We’ll work on it,” I said, letting go of Dustin and moving towards the couch to sit next to Steve. 

“The only thing I’m good at is ice skating and what kind of group activity is that?”

“I love ice skating!” You and Dustin said in unison making all three of you laugh. 

“How about we go together? We can invite the rest of the party too. It’ll be fun to have people of all kinds of experience levels,” Dustin said, walking to the couch to sit on the other side of Steve.

“If we have enough people, we can even play a quick game of hockey,” I whispered, nudging Steve to get his attention before winking at him. 

“You’re on,” He whispered back, placing a quick kiss on your cheek.

Three days later, the entire party was filing out of cars at the outdoor ice rink. Eddie groaned the entire way about how dangerous this was going to be, trailing behind the group. “Eds, I know you’re kinda nervous, but I can help you out,” Steve reassured quietly so nobody but Eddie could hear him. 

“You’re not going to make a punchline?” Eddie asked.

“Cross my heart, no punchlines.”

Twenty minutes later, everyone had their skates laced up and were walking towards the open ice. Excited to be the first to skate on the freshly Zabonied ice, I raced ahead of everyone. Steve also had the same idea. He raced up beside me, grabbed my hand, and together we skated a lap around the ice careful to avoid the timid newbies as they entered.

After a few minutes of free skating, I raced over to the hockey sticks and pucks lined up along the side of the rink. Steve, noticing my actions, came over to grab his own. On a mission to demonstrate his stick-handling skills, Steve skated down the length of the rink, shooting a slapshot into the net. “Now that I know my man is a hockey pro, we’re going to have to make a point to skate more often,” I shouted across the rink.

His laugh echoed through the room, even over the sounds of skates and swearing. “Wanna see who has better stick-handling skills?” I challenged, raising my eyebrows. 

“I’d say you,” Steve said before winking.

“You’re impossible,” I said, laughing as I skated away. I looked around the rink and I couldn’t help but smile. While Steve and I were having a fun little moment, everyone else was stuck holding on to the railing at the entrance. 

“Okay, guys,” I began, skating towards the group. “Let’s learn to skate!”

[sardonic-the-writer]

hi! what are your sonas' attitudes towards slang? do they use it a lot? are any of them stuck in a certain era of slang or desperate to keep up with modern slang as much as possible? do they adopt any specific phrases from friends / family? do they hate certain terms or how certain terms are used now? no pressure lol

hello anon!!! this is actually a lovely ask, let me get to it

tracker—

he's the slightest bit southern, and currently lives in the sixties time period, so yes he does use some slang. normally, he's more of a 'listen and observe' guy, so he doesn't talk as much as other mercs, but when he does (and especially if he's angry or frustrated) he'll clip his words a little bit to get them out quicker

shrimp—

absolutely shrimp uses slang. he moved to gotham almost immediately as a young adult, and more or less lives on the not so good part of town (not that there's really a good part of gotham), so he got familiar with the local slang real quickly. his favorite words to use are all just hateful to cops, if i'm being totally honest

puck—

much like tracker, he grew up in a little american town teetering on being southern. but unlike tracker, it doesn't bleed through his words as much. that's probably because he moved up to england when he was freshly eighteen, and sort of stuck around there with 2D and everyone until they started doing tours. not a lot of slang, but sometimes when he talks to 2D or murdoc he accidentally mirrors their way of speaking/accents, and it embarrasses the hell out of him when he realizes what he's done

cru—

he doesn't ever use modern slang. not much more to say there. unless you count that point of time in which he got stuck in the sixties and has to fit in fast, or face the possibility of getting more weird looks than usual

quinn—

he thinks modern slang is so interesting, but also kind of stupid. call him an old man, which would be highly accurate, but he stopped caring so much about slang past the fifties. as a result for living so long, he talks with a combination of all sorts of slang. he'll use groovy in the same sentence as dude, and it's kind of funny

ezra—

he doesn't use that much slang unless it centers around monsters or the hunting lifestyle. a lot of what he says he picks up from the brothers, too. killing is ganking. vampires are vamps. werewolves are furballs. demons are a pain in his ass. well, aside from the last one, you get it.

[annieqattheperipheral]

WTH IS THIS ARTICLE we have a super spy hockey ninja on the leafs now????

i have no idea who this is and treliving we have no choice but to follow you to the fiery depths of leafie hell but yooo this dude sounds fire for team culture and at bargain price so colour me INTRIGUED

am34's new bunts/bff??? an older rookie'esque grinder who can play top 6.. he does love his geriatric young-at-hearts who beckon to him to be the star and apparently this fella's a chameleon shapeshifter off the ice or something i cannot get a read on this ghost

full article:

The text messages among a group of former University of Denver teammates almost always follow a similar pattern: Someone will try to pry information out of Dylan Gambrell, the 26-year-old centre carving out an NHL career for himself. Yet before they know it, those same friends will instead find themselves sharing insight into their own life and career as the crafty and elusive Gambrell has managed to flip the tables.

That’s the way Gambrell operates.

Sharing personal details doesn’t come naturally to Gambrell. Instead, the Maple Leafs centre signed to a one-year, $775,000 contract this offseason is at his most content when he’s surrounded by teammates, keeping the conversation going but still keeping his cards close to his chest.

“He’s a silent assassin,” former Denver teammate Blake Hillman said of Gambrell. “He doesn’t say much, but he’s very cerebral about the way he handles his life.”

With the likes of Tyler Bertuzzi, Max Domi and John Klingberg joining the Leafs via free agency, the addition of Gambrell has flown under the radar. He’s 26 but has already spent parts of six seasons in the NHL. Early indications are that Domi — despite having played centre before — will line up on the wing to start his Leafs career. And so there looks to be a hole in the fourth-line centre role. Pontus Holmberg could be in contention for the job, given his defensive acumen and how well he adapted in a short amount of time during his 37-game NHL rookie stint last year.

But right now, Gambrell might be in the pole position for the job.

“(Gambrell) has played a lot in the league over the past few years,” Leafs GM Brad Treliving said. “I think he is going to provide us with good depth.”

Those who know Gambrell believe his journey has given him the kind of experience and know-how that could allow him to surprise some onlookers, make the most of his time in Toronto and grab onto a full-time NHL spot.

Throughout Gambrell’s three seasons at the University of Denver, teammates and the coaching staff rarely had to worry much about him.

Not when Gambrell was showing his strong puck skills and speedy skating in a top-six role in just his second year with the program, and putting up more than a point per game throughout his entire three-season NCAA career. And not when contributing in all situations including in key moments late in games en route to a national championship in 2017.

The responsible game Gambrell employed mirrored who Gambrell was off the ice: low-maintenance and remarkably mature. During Gambrell’s 2015-16 freshman season, he was voted the “Most Put Together” teammate in a year-end awards ceremony.

“He’s always been one of those guys looking out for everyone else,” Hillman said of Gambrell.

Gambrell credits moving far away from his Bonney Lake, Wash., home to Colorado at 14 and moving in with the family of future Boston Bruin Brandon Carlo while playing Triple-A hockey as the reason for his early maturity.

“He was always involved (with the team) and always in the mix, in a good way,” Gambrell’s former Denver assistant coach David Carle said.

Carle was invited to Gambrell’s July wedding and was taken aback by the fact that nearly 20 former teammates of different ages were invited. He then remembered what kind of person Gambrell is.

Whenever Carle would tuck his head in on team functions, he would see the entire Denver team in attendance. And he’d then hear later that was because it was Gambrell who would make the effort to include every player, regardless of age or standing within the team.

“(Gambrell) likes to relate to everyone, and in different ways, which is a pretty unique characteristic of his,” former Denver teammate Logan O’Connor said of Gambrell.

While Gambrell might not necessarily be as gregarious as, say, fellow new Leaf Ryan Reaves, his high comfort level with different types of teammates is nonetheless notable. Treliving said early in free agency that he had heard this Leafs team is a “quiet group.” And so Gambrell’s efforts to be consistently inclusive with teammates could have made him an attractive signing in Treliving’s eyes.

“He’s a guy who endears himself well to his teammates because of the quality of person he is, and the values he has,” Carle said.

Being low-maintenance helped Gambrell move on from Denver and earn three different contracts with the San Jose Sharks after being drafted in the second round of the 2016 draft. He spent most of his first full pro season in the AHL learning the ropes, and learning some hard lessons about sticking in the NHL.

Consistency didn’t come easy. Some nights Gambrell looked like the best player on the ice during a 51-game season with the AHL’s San Jose Barracuda, other nights he’d struggle to impact the game.

“He was really hard on himself,” Gambrell’s then-Barracuda head coach Roy Sommer said. “If he didn’t get the results he liked, it affected his personality a little bit. But he started getting better at that.”

Gambrell came to a realization not every young professional comes to: The highly skilled player he was in college, who produced plenty of offence over his three-year career, might not be the player he could be in the NHL.

He’d have to embrace more of the 200-foot game he played at times in college and focus on impacting the game with finer details as opposed to only on the scoresheet. It ended up becoming one of his most important realizations as a pro to date.

“I had to change my game,” Gambrell admits. “Obviously there was a maturing phase, and I realized my defensive game was going to be a much bigger thing. I always thought I was a 200-foot player, but I had to realize how important the defensive side of the game is, too.”

And again, he did it all with the kind of coachable attitude that has endeared him to those who know him. He might have been a relatively high draft pick with a promising offensive future, but his maturity helped him come to an understanding of his NHL future that can be difficult for some to swallow.

“I never once saw him text and complain about being on the fourth line,” Hillman said.

That’s not who he is.

“You’ve got to find your niche,” Gambrell said of his NHL career. “(Playing defensively) was something that helped keep me in the lineup.”

Throughout his four seasons in San Jose, he admired the way veterans such as Joe Pavelski handled themselves with consistent professionalism on and off the ice. It meant that when he landed in Ottawa after an October 2021 trade, he stuck in the NHL with the Ottawa Senators. He scored just seven goals in his 123 NHL games in Ottawa, but the experience added up, as did his ability to read games with his hockey IQ and learn to be in the right spots defensively by utilizing his smarts and speed.

That maturity, skill set and NHL experience could see him beat out the incumbent Holmberg in a training camp battle.

“I think (the Leafs) like my energy and speed and the responsible side of the game that I can bring,” Gambrell said.

The battle for the fourth-line centre role will be one of the few roster battles to watch once Leafs training camp gets underway in September. After a career spent largely out of the limelight, Gambrell will have more eyeballs on him and his play than ever before. To win a spot, he’ll need to show more offence in his game than he has in the NHL. That’s partly why he’s planning on arriving in Toronto well ahead of training camp to acclimatize himself with his new teammates and start developing some chemistry on the ice early on.

But it feels likely the increased attention Gambrell will face in Toronto won’t faze him whatsoever. He’s built his career on keeping his head down and trying to improve.

Just ask his group chat.

“He’s very good at not showing emotion. He always reacts to every situation with calm,” Hillman said. “If there’s one person who will be able to tune everything out, it’s him.”

[janatm]

might share a face and share a last name, but (we are not the same) || PUCKEVA (ft. Gabe)

tagging: Eva Anderson, Noah Puckerman and Gabe Puckerman

date & time: August 16, 2024 in the early evening

location: a waterpark, police station and Puck's SUV

warnings: bad dad, mentions of alcoholism and drug addiction

summary: Puck made good on his promise to take Eva out on a water paprk date. Unfortunately it gets rudely interrupted.

word count: 4,527

EVA was still pushing any and all of her feelings down since the threesome and consecutive run-ins with her boys that followed, yet Puck asking her on an official date had made that much harder. She didn't date (not willingly anyways) or even catch feelings, yet both Puck and Morgan had managed to leave her reeling lately, and that was why she was at a waterpark in a mostly appropriate bikini, a naturally beat face consisting of all waterproof products, and she was being on her best behavior. For now. Tossing her large bag down on a table, She pulled her hair up into a messy bun as she glanced around, thankful that her designer shades were completely blocking the sun. "I feel like I haven't been to a waterpark in over a decade." She hummed, taking in the different people. She was sure that she hadn't been to one of these places in a while because of the insane amount of kids running around, or because she usually preferred the beach, but at least Puck was worth this trip. "What should we do first?"

PUCK was telling himself this was just an excuse to see Eva in a bikini but deep down he knew if that were true he'd have taken her to that secret spot on the beach just before sunset. It was kind of his move. But he was at a waterpark with her because he just wanted to spend time together and there was the added benefit of a bikini. After he paid for them, he went and got the key for their locker while she found a table. Walking up to her, she looked fucking good and he wasn't gonna go crazy with PDA, kids were there, but he did turn his baseball cap backwards so he could hug her from behind. As he moved around her he kept a hand on her waist. "We go a few times a year but I think it's more for me now than Maya." Grabbing her bag he leaned in to give her a kiss on the cheek. "You look so fucking good, I'm mad I can't grab your ass right now." He said low enough so only she could hear. "First let's go put our shit in the locker. then we're going the big ass one with the tube together. Sound good?"

EVA didn't even mind indulging in Puck's desire to see her in a bikini, which was why she'd chosen one that showed just enough to keep the mind wandering. After all, this was what he wanted, and she was nothing if not caring enough to give anything he asked for. She smiled as he hugged her from behind. "So waterparks are more your thing than your kid's? Duly noted." She giggled. Accepting the kiss to her cheek, she wasn't the least bit surprised that he'd wanted to get handsy, which she would have been disappointed about if he hadn't wanted it. "Don't worry, you can do that later." She promised. "But yeah, that sounds good." With that she headed for the locker so Puck could put her bag inside, and she sat her phone inside as well, seeing as how she wouldn't need it while they were together. "By the way, a threesome was not the way I expected for us to throw out the whole 'I'm bisexual' thing." She teased only loud enough for Puck to hear.

PUCK took out his keys and his phone and wallet and placed them in the locker before closing it. Normally he'd keep his phone on him but his apple watch was waterproof and would let him know if anyone needed him. Putting the chain the key was on around his wrist, he laughed at her comment. Sometimes he forgot coming out was a more than once thing. In LA being straight seemed like the minority but he knew that most people probably assumed he was a heterosexual man, so it might be a bit surprising to learn not all of his bodies were ladies. "I wasn't hiding it or anything, I just didn't think about it. Hard to think about anything but you when I'm with you, babe." It was a line and a cheesy one, but that was the charm of it. Taking her hand and intertwining their fingers, he started walking toward the big slide. "Seems like you're into it though."

EVA rolled her eyes playfully at his compliment, and if she wasn't already learning him as quickly as she had been, she would've thought he was just talking shit. Luckily she did know he meant it, even if it was cheesy as hell. Allowing him to take her hand, she smirked as he started to lead the way towards the slide he'd picked out. "I am into it, as if the threesome wasn't obvious proof of that." She giggled. "I just didn't know you or Morgan were bisexual too, or that you had slept with both of us prior to the threesome. And Morgan and I had been taking things a lot slower, so that night was the first time we'd even had sex." She hummed. "But honestly, it was all worth it. That was hands down the best sex I've ever fucking had — which, not that what we did that night you made me dinner wasn't amazing, because it was — but I've never had a threesome like that." She confessed.

PUCK knew he didn't need to worry, but he was a man who appreciated reassurance. So, having it verbally confirmed that Eva was, in fact, chill with his sexuality and more than that, she was into it was conforting. Shockingly, he had run into chicks and dudes who turned their nose up at him being bisexual, like he should just pick one or something, but he didn't entertain that shit. He'd put himself through enough of that bullshit in high school, and now he knew it was biphobic to say shit like that. Needless to say, he's learned a lot over the last decade. "When you say it like that, kinda makes me sound like a hoe." Which, he arguably was but he didn't need it to sound that way. The revelation that their threesome had been the first time that Morgan and Eva had ever had sex made him feel something. Something non sexual and genuine. Special? Like they wanted to experience that first with him. Made that night feel a lot more like something than it had before. "Nah, I know what you mean. Just us is good, obviously, we're se- fun time gods." He corrected himself, because his voice carried. "But something about that night, like clicked, i don't know, I'm entertained two people before and it was never that... natural." Even in his previous successful threesomes, it wasn't something he'd repeat, but with Eva and Morgan it was like, his preferred way of having sex with them. Even though he was really into his alone time with each, it felt complete when it was all three of them together.

EVA had never been met with any scrutiny over her sexuality, yet she knew the bisexual thing seemed to not fare well for men as it did with women. She didn't understand why people were cool with women being into both sexes and not men, yet she'd never been one to judge. Love was love in her opinion, and she just preferred for everyone to be open with their shit like she was. She giggled when Puck took her words the way that he did. "Takes a hoe to know a hoe, right?" She asked softly, not hiding the smirk on her lips. It wasn't as if she hadn't been sleeping with other women before she'd crossed that friendship line with both men, so they were even in her opinion. Nodding along as he seemed to agree with her sentiment about the three of them together, which was a good start, at least now since she knew all three of them were mostly on the same page, even if they hadn't quite clarified that while they were altogether. "The other few of my..fun times involved only one man and two women, so this was a first with our arrangement, but it was the most natural thing I've ever done. But that being said, I do appreciate dates too, and we were in the process of still getting to know each other so we can totally just do stuff like this even if there's no fun time planned for afterwards."

PUCK smiled at her quip about them both being hoes, before leaning in and giving her a quick and location appropriate kiss. Listening as she spoke again, he was surprised to learn that she had been in more than one sex situation with multiple partners. Surprised and a little jealous, which was dumb, she had a past like everybody else, but what could he say? Puck liked being special, so sue him if he wanted him and Morgan to be her first threesome. "I like doing shit with people I like, so I'm definitely good for no pressure dates." As they got through the line for the big slide, they were moving from slide to slide and okay, maybe he went on the launcher slide three times, but he had to do multiple poses, maybe a flip. The next couple of hours really flew by, until the sun wasn't quite as high in the sky. Still nice and sunny, but it was a good time to get in the lazy river and Puck even held Eva's hand so they could stay next to each other. They were just talking about anything when his apple watch started going off. Looking at it he knew who it would be before he even answered. "Shit, sorry, I gotta answer this." Tapping the screen on his watch he answered the call. He could barely hear what was being said, but it was enough to know it was his father and he needed to be bailed out and picked up from jail. "You can't ask whatever chick you're shacked up with to do it?" He askeed into his wrist. "She's the reason I'm fucking in here, you know how emotional wom-" Puck cut his father off. "Give me 45 minutes." And he hung up, not wanting to hear anything else his dad had to say. "I fucking swear, dude has the worst god damn timing." Taking a reath and trying to just stay calm. "I gotta go bail my pops out. I can drop you off if you don't wanna come but..." Puck really fucking hated dealing with his dad alone. "I kinda want you to come." He admitted, she'd be a witness and a comfort, someone to keep him grounded.

EVA accepted the kiss and smiled. "Perfect. Since this one was your idea, I'll pick the next date, and we can invite Morgan if it's something he won't hate." She suggested. She knew he hated large crowds so depending on what they did for the date, it may have just been herself and Puck. She let Puck lead her around the waterpark, hitting up every slide, even some multiple times, and they maneuvered around the entire park as the day started to turn to evening. She was having a ball, truthfully, which was a little more than what she'd been expecting. Not that she expected the adventure to be a dud, she just hadn't been to a waterpark in so long that she hadn't known what all to expect. And the conversation with Puck flowed even easier now than it had the last time they were together on a date, or close to it anyways, so she was enjoying herself until the call came in. "Yeah, go for it." She mumbled, and then she just watched some of the other people running around and enjoying themselves as she waited for Puck to finish his call. She didn't even know who it was, but she was sure that it wasn't a good conversation, based on Puck's body language, but she tried to mind her business as she simply focused on everyone else. It wasn't until he spoke again and it sounded more directed at anyone than other whoever had called, she raised a brow as she faced him again. Eva wasn't expecting what came next, but she didn't even hesitate to nod before he'd even stated he wanted her to come along. "Yeah, of course I'll come with you." She'd done this song and dance for her mom a few times so she truly didn't mind it at all. Grabbing his hand, she led the way back to their locker, opening it up and pulling her bag out before she started to cover herself up. "How often do this happen?"

PUCK felt a wave of relief wash over him as Eva agreed to go with him to bail his dad out. Letting out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding, he let her lead them back to their locker. Working almost on auto pilot, he got himself dressed and slipped his phone back in his pocket and made sure he had his wallet and keys. "I don't know, a few times a year." He answered, putting his hand on the small of his dates back, he lead them out of the water park. "Usually his manager bails him out but for some reason it's me he calls sometimes.Maybe it's his idea of father/son time." Puck joked, as they made it back to the car, he opened her door for her and waited for her to get in before closing it and getting in the driver's seat. As he started the car he let Eva connect her phone to the bluetooth, and put the directions to the police station in Google Maps and started driving, Letting the music fill the space instead of easy conversation, which Puck just didn't have in him right now. He did reach out to put a hand on Eva's knee and it worked to keep him calm. When they got to the station, he turned the car off and sat in silence for a few seconds while he gathered his thoughts. There was no way he was just gonna throw Gabe at Eva with no warning, so he took her hand in hers just to absentmindedly lace their fingers together. "I know I haven't said it or talked about him but it doesn't take a genius to figure out who my father is and he's much coolet in theory than in reality." A pause and a breath. "He's a drunk and an addict and he has been for a really long time. He's kinda gross around hot women, so sorry in advance for whatever he says to you. I'll try to keep his focus on me, but he ain't got a nice thing to say about me, really. So just, you know, whatever he says about me, let him. I'll bail him out, and we'll drop him off at whatever or whoever's place he's staying at. Then I'm gonna do whatever the fuck you want me to do, to you, for you, with you. Okay?" He asked with a smiled as he kissed the back of her hand.

EVA just listened as Puck talked about his dad, and it was clear that he was frustrated or pissed or even a handful of emotions about all of this, so she was trying to just let him vent a little bit as they made they way to the car. Hopping in, she decided to just play some light neo-soul as Puck drove, seeing as he wanted some verbal silence. She didn't mind it, since she was only here as support and would support him in any way that he wanted. Once they made it to the station, she paused the music as she expect him to get out, but when he grabbed her hand, she smiled softly. Once again, she just listened intently as he talked, and naturally, she had done a background check so obviously she knew who his father was, and saw recent reports of his habit of being arrested. Not that she could judge because she'd had her own record as a teen, but she could see why it was such a pain for him. She let him finish before smirking at his promise. "While I will never say no to you satisfying me, you don't have to go out of your way. I can handle Gabe Puckerman. Besides, my mom gets drunks and gets...out of hand sometimes, so I get it. But there is nothing that man can say about you that will change my opinion of you, Noah. And if he hits on me, just ignore it. Wouldn't be the first time some drunk asshole hits on me, so I've got this." She promised before she leaned over and kissed him softly. "We'll be fine, so go bail him out."

PUCK found that he believed Eva when she said Gabe wasn't gonna scare her off. Which wasn't surprising but there was also a lot Eva didn't know about him, and a lot the Gabe loved to bring up because it use to get a rise out of Puck and honestly, sometimes, it still did. But Eva could handle herself and he was glad she was here, even if Gabe is his regular douchebag self, he can look over and see her beautiful face and completely forget his dad is even in the damn car. Leaning into the kiss, he really felt like it wasn't long enough and a part of him just wanted to ditch his father and keep kissing her, but he let the kiss end before giving her the keys so she could keep the A/C running. "Alright, I'm gonna go get him" he said before leaning for just one more good luck kiss. "For the record Satisfying you is never out of my way, and you should definitely call me Noah more." With that he left, thankfully it didn't take long to get through the paperwork and shit, and in about twenty minutes he and his father were on their way to his car and it occured to him he could've just thrown his ass in an uber. But at least he wasn't drunk, although he did seem like he was on something. He told his dad to lean against the car for a second, opening the back door, he looked at Eva, "Hey, baby, said he'd only tell you where he wanted to go, so not a great start." He said before making sure Gabe got in the back of his car safely. "Hey there, pretty thing, I'm Gabriel, the original model of that one, and 100 times more fun." With that, Puck closed his door and got in the Driver's seat.

EVA took the keys and just nodded, before she let him kiss her again. Before she could even fully process what he said next, he was climbing out of the car, and she was left with her jaw dropped. Of course he would say some shit like that just as he was getting out of the car, and she had to channel how flustered she was because she knew without a doubt that Gabe was about to undo that anyways. She scrolled through social media to kill time as she waited, and eventually she saw the two men coming towards the car and she simply nestled into her seat as she waited for them to climb in. Furrowing her brows as Puck spoke, she glanced back at the older Puckerman just in time for him to open his mouth and bring her a feeling of disgust. "You're a rockstar with a handful of issues, affairs, issues, and probably children — trust me, you are not more fun, and Noah's a much better man than you'll ever." She sassed with a devilish smirk on her lips. "Oooh, feisty! I love it when hot women are feisty and talk back to me. Turns me on!" Gabe stated with a chuckle that instantly caused Eva to roll her eyes as she waved a hand at him dismissively. "Save it. You're not getting shit from me, and your bullshit might work on dumb ass women, but it's not gonna work on me. So tell us where to drop you off, and watch your mouth. I can't be respectful for very long." She warned before she turned to Puck. "Are you good, babe?"

PUCK had to admit, his father was slightly worse than usual, but he had expected that, with the addition of Eva, Puck knew his dad would want to show off. Or his version of it anyway. But, his girl was holding her own, just like he knew she would and it was hot and comforting, a very trippy combination. Keeping his focus on her, she really did drown out Gabe's nonsense. So without thinking he took her hand and kissed her knuckles, before starting the car. "Well aren't you two cute? Before he could say anything else, Puck turned around, "You don't tell me where to take you I'm dropping you off at a rehab center." It was a threat Puck had made before but hadn't even actually followed through on. "Acting like a hardass in front of your woman, like you're in charge of shit. You ain't smart enough to be running anything. Dumb as a bag of rocks my son, but he's pretty so at least there's that." It was pretty standard for Gabe to reduce Puck to nothing but a decent face, still kinda stung though. So he turned around, "Rehab it is and it ain't gonna be a nice one either." He said, putting his seatbelt on and putting the car in drive. "He loves me really. Looks up to his old man, use to follow me around everywhere, like a puppy. Such a dutiful man, it's why I call him when i've pissed everyone else off, 'cause I know my boy will always make sure his old man is okay." His hands, gripped the steering wheel a little tighter, so he reached a hand out to hold Eva's hand as he drove. " 'm more interested in your... not girlfriend, you don't do girlfriends and when you do you, I'll let the little lady find that out on her own."

EVA smiled as Puck kissed her knuckles, deciding that anything she could do to help check Gabe would be done at this point just to keep Puck somewhat happy. The older Puckerman may have ruined their date, but she wasn't about to let him sit and disrespect his son either simply because he was a drunk asshole. Rolling her eyes at the sound of his voice, she was glad Puck didn't let him finish, and she was just praying that this man would cooperate and give them a place to go, but of course he didn't. But him insulting Puck instantly made him glare back at the man. Boy, if this wasn't someone she cared about's father, she definitely would've reached back there and broken his nose — and honestly, she wasn't sure that she wouldn't do it by the time they made it to his destination. She took in everything else Gabe said but kept her attention on the younger Puckerman, allowing him to take her hand in his as he drove. But when Gabe tried to throwing out that last bit as if he were trying to ruffle her feathers, Eva turned in her seat to get a good look at him. "Can't be any worse than what you do to women, so maybe you should get off that drunk high horse of yours and take a look in a goddamn mirror." She huffed. "And for the record, I've got one hell of a right hook so I'd advise you to sit back there and zip it." She warned before she squeezed Puck's hand. "You should dump him on Skid Row. He wants to be so damn hard, he should have to fend for himself out there until he can clean up his act." She suggested, and Gabe chuckled. "My boy won't do that. Probably too dumb to even know what this is or where it is anyways." Gabe pointed out. "You sure do got a mouth on you, pretty lady. Guess you're the one wearing the pants in this relationship, huh?" The man taunted, and Puck narrowed her eyes as she turned to Puck once more. "Just say the word and I swear to God I will take him out." She scoffed.

PUCK just kept holding Eva's hand as he drove, somewhat aimlessly, because Gabe was right, he wouldn't drop him off at a rehab center. If Puck thought for one second, his father would actually take rehab seriously, he would. But as it was, the rockstar had no interest in being helped or getting help, he was fine being just the way he was. Maybe one day, Puck will force it, but today wasn't going to be that day. As Eva and his dad went back and forth, he barely listened until he heard Eva's voice address him directly, "Don't bother." He replied with a slight smile. "He ain't worth it." He'd tried to say it low enough that Gabe couldn't hear but they were in a car, and unfortunately Gabe's hearing was just fine. "I ain't worth it? Big words coming from a single teen dad who amounted to nothing and is no one, who's biggest accomplishment is being my son." The older man scoffed, truly amused. "You ain't got nothing but that face of yours to offer and that's mine too. Everything good about you came from me. Your poor kid is doomed." Now Puck could handle pretty much anything is dad threw at him, but he was not allowed to bring up Maya, an Gabe knew that. Pulling the car over on the side of the road, he put the car in park and put the hazards on. "Get out." Gabe laughed. "Or what, you'll cry?" he asked with snark. Puck turned to face his father, "Or I'll throw you out my fucking self." He said seriously. "Now you listen here- Puck cut his father off. "You are a weak, feeble, drug addicted alcoholic and as dumb as I might be I'm smart enough to know you can't fight your way out of a paper bag. So you got two options, text me a god damn place to drop you off or get the fuck out." With that he saw hsi father, still smiling, get his phone out and after a minute, Puck's phone vibrated with an address. Plugging it into google maps, he saw they were only fifteen minutes away and started the car again, turning the hazards off. "You say one word and you're out." Again he turned around to look at his father. "Don't test me." Grabbing ahold of Eva's hand again, they drove.

[perpetual-fool]

-

I think I'm going to create my own language. There's a few reasons. Initially there was the vain hope that maybe I could successfully communicate if everything was very explicit. I suppose the feeling that it might be fun should be enough. Currently I feel like it would be helpful in de-cluttering my thinking.

Conversational English at least, seems to be lacking a lot of the concepts I need. But honestly, mostly I think I need to stop automatically processing things as though they're valid. Like, I ran across this thing talking about 'bad' martial arts. Broadly, I suppose it was making fun of the excuses people give when their art doesn't 'work'. Issue being, they didn't define what 'working' meant. And they can't, really. It's too vague of a concept and the problem isn't that simple. You may as well talk about whether different martial arts have good 'stopping power'. But I find myself trying to rationalize things.

As I'm trying to come up with an example I'm realizing my ideas aren't actually sound. The same issue I think, I saw touched on from a clip with Neil deGrasse Tyson. He was saying, the claim that the earth is flat and the claim that the whole universe was once the size of a marble, are both equally absurd. And he was saying the difference is that one of them has evidence, which is technically not wrong. But the average science believer has likely not looked over that evidence. And judging from rumors of the replication crisis, the scientists themselves haven't necessarily been going through the whole 'science' process.

I have two points here. One, what the vast majority of people are believing is stories. And all those stories are plausible because they're consistent with other stories. Say, if you knew I collected swords, and I told you I bought another sword, you'd probably believe me. But if I told you I bought a helicopter and you know I'm unemployed, you probably wouldn't. And neither of those things is based on evidence. Two, on a personal basis, evidence is nothing like the stories. Like, if I take an idea like thermal expansion, deduce that bridges can't be solid or they'd break, and then see that bridges are actually built with joints and sometimes rollers that allow them to move, that's not based on evidence. That's based on the story, though I've been out of the Antitheism thing too long to tell you which fallacy that is. Actual evidence is like: I polished my cast iron pan and the egg slid around like an air hockey puck, except when it stuck. From which I deduced that the surface texture of the pan has virtually nothing to do with sticking.

S'yeah, I think I need to do something drastic to break the habit of rationalizing others' claims, and to rework how I think about stuff.

- Unrelated, I'm having gender feelings. Someone I follow recently picked the name 'October', which is a fantastic enby noun-name. Kind of enamored with it. And I have to admit, I'm not satisfied with mine. My feelings are leaning more feminine, I guess. I want a girl name, 'Aria' or something. But, while I'd like to be a cute androgynous girl, that's not what I am. I'm a big hairy man with thinning hair, it would be weird if I had a girl name. Sad about that.

[hxt1b]

Let’s Just Let it Go

Doyoung x Reader 

Genre: Angst, some fluff (it’s there I swear) CollegeAU (HockeyPlayer!Doyoung) 

Warning: MATURE CONTENT/DARK THEMES, drinking (drink responsibly please), SMUT, swearing, TW sexual assault. 

WC: 11k 

Song Rec: when the party’s over by Billie Eilish 

Accompanying Stories: As Long As I’m Here, Isn’t It Lovely All Alone. 

Masterlist 

Hockey AU Masterlist 

A/N: You do not have to read all the stories to read this one. You can read this as a standalone, however reading the other two will give a better understanding of the backgrounds of the characters so if you do read all I’d suggest reading the other two first. However, by all means this can be read independently you will still understand the plot and everything without reading the other two. Lastly, please excuse the grammar, I read it over but still some things may have slipped through.

“You keep condoms in your wallet?” You asked looking up at him. Doyoung’s head was swimming, but then again that much alcohol would do that to you. 

“Would you rather I didn’t have one right now?” he asked his words slurring. You shook your head. Doyoung smirked returning his attention to opening the packet and putting the condom on. He pushed you into the wall again, grabbing you from the back of your thighs forcing you to wrap your legs around his waist as he pushed into you. 

“Fuck,” He grunted as he began to move in you. To be honest, Doyoung didn’t remember your name, he had asked, but he couldn’t recall. You’d met a couple of hours ago in the packed club, Doyoung was seeing double of everyone by the time his eyes landed on you, keeping his steps stable was a feat as he made his way over to where you were dancing, drawing you in however wasn’t that hard. You were just as drunk as him. 

Your arms looped around his neck as you filled his ears with breathy moans. Doyoung was so far gone, his mind was empty as you tightened around him. A few more thrusts and he came, letting his head fall into your shoulder as he did. You stilled against him; he didn’t really know if you finished. But he was too drunk to care. After getting his breathing to even out slightly he pulled out of you. 

“Well,” He said as he carefully took off the condom, “Thank you I guess.” He looked around the bathroom locating the garbage can and tossed the used condom into it. With that, he left the bathroom not looking back at you. He was still stumbling seeing two of everyone one that passed by him. 

He laughed to himself as he ran into a chair. But it was better this way, he didn’t remember anything this way. Kim Doyoung could successfully say that he had just wrapped up the most unmemorable summer of his life. Unmemorable because he was drunk throughout the entire thing, but it was okay because not once this summer did Doyoung think about the girl that cheated on him. Not once did he think about Yuta, the man that he looked up to. The one that slept with his girlfriend. Nope, they didn’t even cross his mind. 

But they did. 

Every damn day. 

---

“Get up.” The voice pounded in Doyoung’s head and a hand reached out and shook him. He grumbled. Slowly opening his eyes, he glared up at Kun. He watched as his friend rolled his eyes at him. 

“We have practice.” Doyoung pulled his blanket over his head, he shouldn’t have drank last night. “Come on.” 

What a new kind of hell he’d entered. He’d told himself that once the hockey practice started, he’d be fine. He wouldn’t drink, Yuta had managed to graduate, he’d avoid his ex, the campus was big enough. He could still avoid his ex, she wasn’t even on campus yet. Only the athletes were here a month before everyone. But the not drinking once hockey started, that didn’t happen, so he told himself when the semester started, and today after practice the semester started, he would have to stop drinking and his ex would be back. 

He groaned again throwing his covers off of himself and getting up. His head ached with each step he took towards the shared bathroom. They had moved, this house was bigger but they still needed to share a bathroom, well at least Ten, Jaehyun, Jungwoo and himself did. Kun upon stepping into the master room with the huge en-suite pulled his new captain status on them and took the damn room. 

“You’re just waking up?” Jaehyun asked him, as he passed the younger boy in the hallway. Doyoung didn’t respond just walked past him keeping his head down.  

Getting into the bathroom he looked at himself, taking in his appearance, he had a huge hickey on the side of his neck, how he got it was a slight blur to him. He remembered flashes of the night only. His hair was sticking out into a million directions he looked awful, he looked sick. Looking away from himself he grabbed his toothbrush and got ready for practice, he was gonna need a gallon of coffee. 

Hockey was an escape, he could be as brutal as he wanted on the ice, he was itching for a proper game so that he wouldn’t have to hold himself back he couldn’t bang up his teammates. He needed a game. 

Well, it was an escape until the new guy opened his mouth. 

“Hungover again Kim, why am I not shocked?” Doyoung sneered at the man lacing up his skates as he walked into the change room. His hands clenching into fists at his side, but he didn’t reply, because he was hungover, and this guy was the only one that called him out on it. Because he was the only one that didn’t know. Yet, it didn’t make Doyoung hate him any less. 

What kind of a nickname was Winwin anyway?

Rolling his eyes Doyoung dumped his stuff into his cubby taking his gear out and getting ready for practice. 

“Ignore him,” Kun said from his left. 

“I am,” Doyoung replied. 

On the ice, Doyoung couldn’t deny the new kid was an ace, why he transferred to their school he couldn’t say. He used to play for the team that they lost to last year, one step away from the cup. But that school had a killer roaster, this kid being one of the beasts on it, but here he was. Skating towards Doyoung with the puck. Their coach was ending this practice with a scrimmage, the hockey season would be starting in a few days and the coach claimed that this would re-charge everyone’s competitive sides because this was their season. 

He let him get close before he began his chase, letting Winwin come to him before blocking his path he hit him into the boards. It wasn’t a hard hit, but it was a hit. They both lost the puck as Winwin bounded off the plexiglass and slammed his hands into Doyoung’s chest. 

“What the fuck man?!” He asked. Doyoung shrugged, their coach was yelling as he skated over. Kun already there grabbing Winwin as he glared at Doyoung. 

“What on earth are you doing kid?” The coach barked at Doyoung. 

“Sorry I just got into it.” He said not feeling sorry at all. Maybe he wasn’t doing the best job of ignoring him. 

“Apologize to him.” He mentally scowled, he didn’t appreciate being treated like he was a toddler. 

“Sorry.” 

“Okay get off the ice, shower. Practice is over!” 

“Dude you gotta relax.” Ten said skating next to Doyoung. 

“Why the fuck do they even call him Winwin?” Doyoung’s irritation was evident “I fucking hate the guy.

“It’s because he fucking Wins, they use to call him their lucky charm ‘Winwin.’” 

--- 

Loneliness was a part of life that you accepted long ago, it was something that just came with your life. Your parents were rich, and they shouldn't have had kids, because they couldn’t give two shits about the two children they had. So, loneliness wasn’t an issue for you not until the reality settled in that this wasn’t loneliness it was abandonment and that was a hard pill to swallow. Looking around your dorm you took in your roommate's side it was decorated in whites, it kind of hurt your eyes but you weren’t going to say anything. It was better than being stuck in an apartment with your brother. You felt bad when you left him alone in the huge penthouse seeing as you were the reason that the two of you were here. But you couldn’t take it there anymore everything reminded you of the fact that your parents didn’t care about you. 

Your phone rang pulling you away from the anger that was bubbling up inside of you at the thought of your parents. Being replaced by a growing laugh as you looked at the caller ID. Your brother. 

“Hello.” You answered. 

“Want to move back yet?” He teased. 

“No, I do not I actually like it here.” You replied getting off your bed and beginning to pace your room. He laughed, the sound making you smile. 

“I was just teasing. I called to ask if you wanted to get lunch together today?” He asked. You frowned. 

“Sicheng, you aren’t eating with your teammates yet?” Your tone not hiding your disappointment. 

“No,” he replied curtly. 

“Be nice to them, be friends with them.” 

He ignored you, “So are you going to eat with me or not?” 

“No, I’ll be eating with my roommate.” You answered as she came into the room, she smiled at you having heard what you said, and you smiled back. Despite her obsession with white, you actually really liked her. “Speaking of whom, I gotta go now.” 

“Fine.” 

--- 

By lunch, Doyoung was starving, having not had time to eat after he showered in the change room. His stomach was grumbling loudly when he took his seat next to Kun at their table in the cafeteria. 

“You know I’m shocked by how good the cafeteria food is here.” Mark, a first-year rookie, said drawing the attention of the table. 

“Yo same, people complain a lot about cafeteria food I was actually stressed.” Hendery another rookie agreed.  

Doyoung nodded, “We lucked out.” 

“Yo Winwin, come sit here!” Kun yelled from next to Doyoung making him turn his head in the direction Kun was yelling in. Winwin stopped in his tracks and looked over at the table. Doyoung glared at the side of Kun’s head, but Kun ignored him. 

“Be nice,” Kun muttered to him as Winwin sat down across from him at the only empty seat on the table. Doyoung did his best not to scowl. Doyoung retreated into his own brain as the table continued to chat. He focused on the broccoli on his plate. He didn’t dare look around the cafeteria. 

Fuck looking at the insufferable cocky bastard in front of him, he was afraid he would see his ex. Ever since practice ended in the morning he was on edge; he didn’t want to run into her in a hallway again he was afraid because he didn’t know how he’d react. He wanted to say he wouldn’t care that he’d just walk by her and maybe he would, but he felt like he wouldn’t the risk was too high. 

“So, the party is at our place on Friday to kick off the year, that way we can celebrate the four rookies joining our team, along with Winwin coming to us this year and our boy Jungwoo finally hitting the ice in a game,” Jaehyun said, as Doyoung finally tuned back into the boy's conversation. 

“So, you’ll come Winwin?” Ten asked. Doyoung looked up at him frowning, the younger boy played with the fries on his plate as he nodded. 

“Yeah, I’ll come by.” 

“Cool bring friends if you want to.” Ten said smiling at him. 

--- 

Doyoung made it to Friday without a drink, and then he thought about how he promised himself he wouldn’t drink when the semester started. He then re-evaluated his choice and edited his promise, he wouldn’t drink without cause this semester, and a start of the year party was cause. Was it not? The boy in the mirror smiled back at him as he held his cup up to his reflection in a cheers before downing it. 

It was most definitely cause. 

Leaving his room his body already buzzing he skipped down the stairs, straight into a girl. You.  Doyoung looked you up and down, taking in the tight jeans you had on. He liked the way they made your ass look. He also really liked the baby pink top you had on. It was clinging to you like a second skin showing off your assets. Doyoung smirked down at you, for some reason you looked familiar. 

“I’m sorry about that.” He said and you scoffed. 

“Whatever.” 

Doyoung stared at your back as you walked away confused at the reaction he gleaned. He’d never been bad with chicks or at least he thought he wasn’t. He looked over at your friend who shrugged at him before following you. 

His house was full of people he didn’t know, and some he did. But he was at ease, this was one place he knew that his ex wouldn’t show up. So, with a quiet laugh to himself, he followed you into the living room. You were standing beside Winwin. He leaned against the wall and watched you interact with his teammate; the interaction was friendly. From the way you reacted to him it was easy to see that the two of you were close. 

“What are you looking at?” Xiaojun, another first-year rookie, asked coming up next to him. 

Doyoung replied by nodding his head in the direction of the pair, and Xiaojun nodded. 

“His sister is hot, isn’t she?” Doyoung froze as the words left the youngers mouth. Sister.

And then it came to him, the image of you pressed against a bathroom wall, with your dress pushed up as he moved inside you. Doyoung mentally facepalmed as he remembered how he left you. Turning away Xiaojun, Doyoung moved out of the living room and into the kitchen. He went straight to the cabinet where Jaehyun kept his good liquor. Pulling out a large bottle of tequila Doyoung looked around for a shot glass. He turned around and straight into Jaehyun himself. Jaehyun looked at him with a ‘what are you doing’ expression on his face. 

“I will buy you more.” Doyoung simply said finally locating the object he was looking for. Bringing the small glass over to his spot he poured some for himself. Jaehyun watched him as he tipped his head back downing the alcohol not even flinching at the burn. 

“Whoa,” Jaehyun said as Doyoung went to pour himself another one. “Aren’t you trying to like drink less or something?” 

“I slept with Winwin’s sister.” He quickly replied taking the next shot. 

“Just now?” Jaehyun asked taking the shot glass from Doyoung after poured himself another shot. 

“No. Last week.” 

“Dude what the fuck.” 

“Dude what the fuck indeed.” Your voice cut into their conversation making them both snap their head towards you. Leaning forward you took the full shot glass from Jaehyun’s hand and drank it. 

“I didn’t even get to finish.” You said after the burn in your throat subsided. Doyoung flushed as the memory of how he left you in the bathroom flooded his mind. Jaehyun looked at him a shocked expression on his face before he broke into a smile. Doyoung could tell he was trying not to laugh at him. 

He scowled in your direction taking the shot glass from you before pouring himself another shot. Jaehyun took it before he could drink it. 

“Slow down,” Jaehyun said the previous laughter gone. Doyoung rolled his eyes and moved to walk away from you and Jaehyun. 

“You know,” You said moving into his space. The two shots he’d just taken hadn’t quite hit him full force yet. “up until you ran away from me, I was actually having a good time.” Your chest brushed his as you leaned further into him. Doyoung narrowed his eyes but didn’t back away from you. 

“Too bad you don’t actually know how to make a girl cum.” You pulled away from him taking the shot glass again. Doyoung glared at the side of your head as you poured yourself another shot. He looked past you meeting Jaehyun eyes again, the boy flat out laughing this time. 

“I do, in fact, know how to make a girl cum.” He said. You scoffed. 

“I wouldn’t know.” You replied and threw your head back taking the shot. You shot him a wink before walking away from him. Jaehyun only laughed harder when Doyoung looked at him again. Sneering at the younger boy he reached for the shot glass again. 

“No,” Jaehyun said grabbing it before he did. “Pace yourself, Kun will slaughter you. You promised.” He regretted speaking to the new captain sometimes, he regretted telling Kun so much, but he did need help keeping himself in check. Doyoung rolled his eyes at Jaehyun before walking away. 

For the rest of the party, he couldn’t get his mind off of you. You stuck to your brother and your friend for the majority of the party and Doyoung didn’t like to interact with him more than he already needed to. Taking his eyes off you as you laughed at something your friend said Doyoung looked around the living room, Kun and Jaehyun weren’t anywhere in sight. He could only spot the rookies as they played beer pong in the corner of the room. Getting up from his spot on the couch he made his way into the kitchen again not seeing any of his roommates. Taking his chance, he made his way to the cabinet pulling it open and grabbing Jaehyun’s Tequila again. Your words pounding in his head as he took a shot straight from the bottle. 

“Getting shit-faced as usual,” Winwin said coming into the kitchen. Doyoung didn’t look at him as he took another swing. 

“How about you mind your own business,” Doyoung said and brushed past him back into the living room taking the bottle with him. His eyes narrowed in on you as you swayed to the music. Doyoung wasn’t in the mood of arguing with Winwin but if he had been he would have claimed that this was nothing compared to how his drinking usually went. He hadn’t had more than a couple of sips of Kun’s drink after the shots he took in the kitchen until now. Walking up to you he caught your attention, your eyes landing on the bottle he held in his hand. 

He let you take it from him as he leaned into the wall. He watched you take a drink some of the alcohol flowing out the corner of your mouth. 

“Where did your friend go?” He asked as you wiped at your mouth. 

“Home. She’s not really into parties.” You replied. Doyoung watched as you licked your lips passing him the bottle back. But he didn’t want the alcohol. His mind running as he took you in, his mind flashing to the night last week. 

“That’s a shame.” He replied. Your eyes darkened as he reached out and pulled you to him. “So, you're just here all by yourself now. Hanging out with your brother.” His hand moving to the side of your neck as he looked down at you. You let him, biting your lip as you looked up at him. 

“There’s nothing wrong with hanging out with my brother.” You replied. 

“No there isn’t except that you aren’t hanging out with him right now, are you?” You frowned up at him and then looked around the room. Doyoung followed your gaze, Winwin was still in the kitchen. Doyoung smiled to himself as you turned your eyes back to him. 

“It’s a good thing I came when I did.” You snickered at his words. 

“Is it though?” He rolled his eyes at you. That was it, he could not go down in history with this shit on his name. 

---  

You crashed into his door, your back stinging from the impact but you ignored it as his lips returned to yours. His lips were rough, moving against yours at a bruising rate, you loved it. His hands were roaming your body pulling at your clothes. 

“Bed.” You breathed against his mouth. He chuckled at you as he grabbed your hands holding them above your head as he continued to kiss you. 

“You don’t get to call any shots babe.” He said, his mouth moving from your lips to your jaw, leaving a start mark on your skin. You moaned tilting your head to give him more space, he took the chance to leave soft kisses down your neck towards your chest. His hands letting yours go as he lowered himself down your body. 

He looked up at you as he got on his knees, his fingers grabbing at the buttons of your jeans before undoing them. You watched as he undressed you, leaving you naked from the bottom half as you stepped out of your jeans. Doyoung licked his lips as he grabbed your leg draping it over his shoulder. 

He pressed a wet kiss to the inside of your thigh, your breath hitched as you watched him. Your hand moving to his hair. He moaned softly when you tugged on the strands pulling him towards your wet heat. He pressed a kiss to your clit, using his fingers to separate your folds, relieving some of the tension that was boiling up in your body. You moaned when he darted his tongue out, a short lick. Before retreating again and looking up at you. Your eyes glassed over as you pulled at his hair again. 

He obliged again, licking up your slit slowly, dragging his tongue through your wet folds. He groaned into you, the vibrations causing you to shiver. Your head fell back against the door and he took your clit into his mouth, sucking slowly. His tongue ghosting over it. You moved your hips against his mouth wanting him to add his fingers. But your words were lost on you, only nonsense flowing past your lips as he picked up his pace. Your moans grew louder as you drew closer, your eyes closed shut as you chased your climax. 

His name rolled off your tongue as your back arched off the door. The muscles in your body tightened, as you clambered for a better grip on him. You felt his teeth gently nip at your hard nub and you crashed over the edge, your orgasm taking over your body as you pulled at his hair. He continued his ministrations, working you through your orgasm. Your body was in overdrive as you came down, a lot more sensitive than you previously were. You pulled at his hair again pulling away from you, he scowled up at you as you finally looked down at him. His lips were red and wet. He grabbed your hands as he got up. Pulling you to the bed. 

He let you lay down, as he rounded the bed going to his nightstand. He pulled out silver handcuffs. Your breathing shallowed as you took in the steel in his hands.  

“No more touching me.” He said as he placed a knee onto the bed leaning over you. He grabbed your hands bringing them up to his headboard. He closed one handcuff around your wrist the cold metal making you hiss as it came in contact with your skin. He looped the handcuffs around one of the metal rungs on his bed before bringing the other one to your other hand locking you in. 

He took a second to look down at you, before leaning down and kissing your swollen lips. You moaned into him, his tongue brushing against yours, you could taste yourself on him and it was driving you crazy. Your thighs already moving against each other as your body reacted to him, more moisture pooling in between your legs. 

“I probably should have taken this off first,” Doyoung said pulling away from your lips. His hands moving under your shirt pushing it up off you leaving it around your hands, he did the same with your bra. 

“But then again, you’re not the most attentive to details, are you?” You teased, he narrowed his eyes at you pinching your nipple, earning a soft cry from you. 

“I wouldn’t be saying shit like that right now.” He threatened, lowering his mouth to your breast. You gasped as he took your pointed nub into his hot mouth, swirling his tongue around your nipple before letting it go. He glanced up at you before trailing wet kisses over to your other breast and doing the same thing there. You squirmed underneath him, clenching your thighs tightly as you got worked up again. He pulled back from your chest looking down at your closed legs, a chuckle leaving him as he looked back up at you. His eyes dark, his pupils blown. 

Adjusting so that he was between your legs he hovered over you, leaving marks on your collarbone. You hissed moving against him, you could feel his erection through his jeans. You rolled your hips into him savouring the small amount of friction you were getting until he grabbed your hips and pushed them down into his bed. You groaned against his mouth as he pressed his mouth onto yours, his tongue pushing against yours. 

Finally, his fingers connected with your core, he slid a finger into you using his thumb to rub your already abused and sensitive clit. A loud moan left you again as your wrists pulled against the handcuffs, the metal biting into your skin. 

“Faster please.” You whined trying to move against his hand but not being able to, his hand holding your hip only tightened. You’d most definitely have a bruise there tomorrow. He picked up the pace. He kissed you harder as he added another finger, his tongue mirroring the actions of his hand as he propelled you towards another orgasm, your body seized up again, muscles tightening as you arched up into him. Your orgasm came faster this time, having already been worked up from the previous one. You panted against him as he pulled his fingers out of you, you watched biting your lower lip as he took his fingers into his mouth, sucking them clean. 

“I’d say you’d agree, I’m actually great at making women cum.” 

--- 

You walked into the cafeteria the next day for lunch, the hockey team as per usual was in their typical spot. Your brother sitting in the middle talking. You smiled as you neared the table coming up behind Doyoung. Kun smiled at you as you looped your arms around Doyoung’s neck. He stiffened for a second before turning his head to look at you, only relaxing when he realized it was you. 

“Your dear brother is right there.” He said to you quietly. 

“My brother doesn’t dictate who I fuck.” You replied pressing a kiss to his lips. Doyoung narrowed his eyes at you as you took the empty seat next to him. For some reason, you were really bold around this man, something you hadn’t been in a long time. You looked across the table feeling your brothers’ eyes on you. You smiled at him before turning back to Doyoung, but Doyoung was looking past you. Trying to get his attention but failing you followed his gaze, seeing a girl who was also staring back. You recognized the girl as your neighbour. 

“Do you know her?” You asked finally getting Doyoung’s attention. He didn’t reply just pulled your chair closer before snaking his hand around the back of your head and pulling your lips to his. You kissed him back with the same desperation he displayed only pulling away when you needed to breathe. Kun whistled as you wiped at your lips, when you looked at Doyoung he was looking past you again. You threw a quick glance over your shoulder to see the girl gone. 

“Doyoung?” 

“My ex.” He answered you as he turned to his food. 

---  

Sitting in your room as Sena, your roommate and you waited for your next class you replayed the way Doyoung had reacted in the cafeteria.

“Sena,” you started looking over at her, “you said you stayed in this dorm last year too?” Sena nodded turning her attention to you. “Did you have the same neighbour?” 

“Yeah, why?” She asked, now putting her pen down and turning her full attention to you. 

“Her and Doyoung used to date, right?” Sena sighed her eyes moving around the room as she realized what you were asking. 

“Yeah, they did. She cheated on him though. I would hear them sometimes, mostly Doyoung, but it was painful to hear. One night. He begged her to let him in for hours and she just left him out in the hall. It was all over campus too, she slept with his teammate. Yuta.” 

You bit your lip as Sena turned back to her book, you didn’t know how to react. Being cheated on was a horrible thing but to have it happen with someone as close as your teammate. 

“Fuck a teammate that doesn’t know the first thing about being a decent human.”  

Your brothers’ words floated into your head. You were confused about how people could just so easily trample over others. You thought about Doyoung’s face at lunch, how quickly he shut off after seeing his ex. Your mind floating to the dark places you tried very hard to hide from as you remembered the last party you’d gone to at your old university.  

“Crap Y/N we have ten minutes until class let’s get going,” Sena said as she scrambled to get her stuff together. 

---

You saw Doyoung again after class, he was walking across the parking lot to his car. He hadn’t seen you yet but you smiled as you decided to make your way over to him, it was weird that you enjoyed his company only because besides fooling around nothing else had really happened. You made it to his car before he did. So, you took the extra free time to stare at him, you took in the way he scrunched his eyes against the autumn sun, the way the breeze blew through his hair. 

“Doyoung!” You blinked your eyes away from him and moved your eyes in the direction of the call. You saw your neighbour again, you quickly looked back at Doyoung as he froze, stopping in his steps. You watched as his hands tightened into fists at his side and his chest rose and fell with deep breaths. He ignored her and continued in your directions towards the car. 

“Hey,” You said softly catching his attention. His head snapped to yours as he unlocked his car. He didn’t smile at you just nodded. “You going home?” he nodded again taking his bottom lip between his teeth in a manner that showed he wasn’t happy. 

“Get in.” He said as he yanked open his door. You obliged, pulling open the passenger door. You threw a glance over your shoulder. She was still standing there; you couldn’t help but sneer as you ducked into his car. 

He was silent as he pulled out the parking lot, his hands holding the steering wheel tightly causing his knuckles to turn white. You leaned forward and looked at the side of his face, you stared, because he wasn’t even turning on the radio. 

“Uh, you're being weird.” He said as you tilted your head more and moved closer to his side. 

“Am I?” You asked, he furrowed his eyebrows and pushed you back taking one hand off the wheel. 

“Tell me about it.” You said settling back into your seat, “Just say what’s bothering you it’ll help and I swear I won’t judge you.”  

He stayed silent and you sighed. 

“It can’t be worse than not knowing how to make a girl cum.” You joked. He scoffed as he glanced over at you again his face fighting a smile. 

“You know that’s not true.” He replied. 

“So, tell me.” You insisted again, “I mean I do know that she cheated on you.” You added bluntly. His barely-there smile disappearing again pushing him back into his silence. 

“She doesn’t deserve this much from you, you know that?” you said as he pulled into his driveway. “This much energy, and time.” He parked the car, but he didn’t move, both of you stayed in your seats not even unbuckling your seat belts. 

“She didn’t apologize, not once.” He was looking down at his hands. “Everyone tells me that she doesn’t deserve my time. She once told me that I didn’t deserve this, but you get what you deserve right? People always say that, what the fuck did I ever do to deserve this?” You shook your head as he spoke. Unbuckling your seat belt, you reached for him. Letting your hands guide his head so that he was looking at you, his eyes were watery and red filled with angry unshed tears. 

“The world does not give you what you deserve Doyoung, the world is unfair, and people are cruel. You did not deserve to be cheated on.” He stared at you, his hands shaking. He blinked his eyes forcing the moisture away before he moved, grabbing your chin and pulling your lips to his. You let him, getting caught up in the way his lips moved against yours, he stole your air. Greedily moving his hands to your hair and you let yours slip to his shirt, holding him close to you. 

He pulled away; his breathing uneven as he looked at you again. 

“Why are you here?” He asked, and you smiled at him. 

“Because babe, contrary to my jokes you can make a girl cum.” 

--- 

Doyoung enjoyed your company, he liked your weird bluntness, your lack of fear of the world but most of all he liked the sex. He liked that you looked at him like you wanted to eat him. He like that he didn’t feel lonely around you. He just liked you. 

“So we're basically friends with benefits then huh?” You asked pulling him out of his thoughts. He looked over at you, taking in the fact that you were still naked on his bed even though you two had fucked over an hour ago. 

“I mean because like if we are I just wanna know if we're the kind that don’t fuck other people or if we’re the kind that do.” He was perplexed by your rambling not expecting you to say this, and he wasn’t sure how to respond not that he got the chance because you continued. 

“I mean I’m not the type to sleep with more than one person like that, not that there’s anything wrong with people who do, I just would like to know if you’re, like you know, sleeping with people other than me that’s all.” 

He smiled at you as your cheeks turned a dark shade of red as you let words pour out of your mouth. 

“I’m not sleeping with anyone else.” He said cutting you off. You bit your lip, trying to hide the painfully obvious smile that was stretching across your face. Doyoung’s own smile only grew as he got up from his desk chair and moved to his bed climbing on top of you. He pressed his lips against yours lightly. 

“Want to go out somewhere today?” he asked looking down at you. 

“Like where?” 

--- 

“An indoor theme park?” You asked your eyes widening as you took in the rides and attractions. “You know in the month that I’ve known you Kim Doyoung, I did not take you for the theme park type.” He smiled at you as you continued to look around your hand reaching for his the more excited you got. 

“Come we have to start with this.” You said and began to pull him in the direction of the roller coaster. “No, wait,” You paused and pulled him in the other direction, “That’s gotta be last.” Doyoung laughed behind you letting you pull him. 

“Doyoung!” You exclaimed in amusement stopping in your tracks as you got excited again. “Look how big that bear is.” Your eyes moved to Doyoung’s face a huge smile taking over your facial expression. He looked down at you, his eyebrow cocked up as he looked down at you. 

“What?” You asked, getting slightly self-conscious as he looked at you. 

“I haven’t said a single word, yet you know that?” He teased leaning towards you. You rolled your eyes and pushed at his chest. 

“Get me the bear, Kim.” 

He didn’t get you the bear, turned out Doyoung sucked at these kinds of games because he tried five times and each time won nothing. You had to drag him away from the stall because if you didn’t, he would have stayed there the entire time. Hours passed as you went on ride after ride and played a couple more games where you did win a small bear, you’d passed it to Doyoung with a teasing remark that had him glaring at you. 

Exhausted you settled into the bench as you waited for Doyoung to come back with something to eat. You smiled at him when he looked over at you as he stood in the line for mini donuts, he winked back at you. A warm feeling settled into your stomach, you didn’t have time to think about it though as your phone began to ring. 

“Hello, brother.” You said happily. 

“Mom and dad called,” he said getting straight to the point, “They instructed that we have to go back for a dinner.” Your heart rate picked up as you processed what your brother had just said to you. You were beginning to feel warm as anger bubbled up inside you. 

“After they kicked us out?” You asked. Your anger coming out in your tone. Winwin didn’t respond. “Fuck them I’m not going.” 

“We have to Y/N, you know we have to.” He said and you hung up on him. Fuck them all. Who did they think they were? Winwin called again and you ignored the call turning your phone off. You didn’t want to deal with this right now. First, they kick you and your brother out over a business deal and now, now they were threatening money. You knew that you and your brother didn’t have incomes you knew that at the end of the day you still needed them. But you hated it. 

You tucked your phone away, looking up at Doyoung as he walked over to you and sat down, you took a mini donut shoving it into your mouth, your mouth burning with how hot it was. You swore as you opened your mouth and took in air to cool it down. Doyoung laughed at you, and just like that the anger from earlier dissipated and the warm feeling you had from before came back. You watched Doyoung as you chewed and he laughed at you, you couldn’t get enough of his laugh. He laughed around you a lot, and to be honest, you lived for it. 

“You’re so dumb.” He said still calming down from his laughing fit. His hand reached out rubbing at the corner of your mouth, wiping away sugar, and you swore your stomach felt like you were on the rollercoaster all over again. 

---

His hands were everywhere, grabbing at everything. Loud breaths filled your ears as he panted around you, your heart was beating a mile a minute in the worst kind of way. You opened your mouth to scream but you couldn’t as he pushed his tongue down your mouth. You couldn’t push him away he was everywhere.  

You woke up with a startle, your body drenched in a cold sweat. You shivered as your mind went into overdrive, your pulse drumming loudly as you turned over in your bed. You took in large breaths to try and calm yourself, to distract yourself from the memory. But every time you closed your eyes that night would come back. 

“No.” You said as Dae swarmed you, backing you into a corner. He was drunk insanely drunk, you pushed at his chest as his hands began to wander up to your thigh. 

He shushed you, his mouth coming down to yours. You shoved at him again turning your head to the side. 

“Why are you being this difficult?” he asked, his hand shooting out and grabbing your wrists. Your mind went blank as his mouth pushed back against yours his tongue pushing into your mouth. His knee came up between your legs. You screamed, and before you knew it, he was ripped off you. Your brother over him, fists were flying everywhere but you couldn’t hear anything over your own hysteria. Your hands were shaking as you pushed out the room and out the house, gasping for air as you tried to calm your breathing. 

 More hands were around you, pulling you towards them but you pushed them away. 

“Hey, hey.” It was Winwin, “I’m here. Let’s go home.” He said. You looked at him, your vision blurry. His lip was cut and from the way, his cheekbone was swelling you knew it would bruise tomorrow. 

You cried harder. 

You opened your eyes again, reaching for your phone. You thought that was gonna be the worst day of your life, but the next day was worse. 

Hitting the call button, you held the phone up to your ear. 

“Hello?” His voice was groggy, you realized that you’d woken him. 

“Doyoung.” You said quietly, “Can you come get me?” 

--- 

You weren’t shocked when he came, but that shocked you. The fact that you weren’t shocked. You could tell he was tired when he pulled up to your building. 

“Sorry,” You said as you got into the car. He shook his head slightly shivering as he looked over at you. 

“Are you okay?” You looked at your hands. You knew you could tell him, you knew you trusted him. You also knew that if you said you didn’t want to talk about it he’d just take you to his house and you’d sleep, but you needed to talk about it. You wanted to tell him. 

“My parents called my brother today.” You started, “They want us to go see them for dinner.” You looked over at Doyoung taking in his reaction, he looked confused, but he didn’t say anything he just listened and waited for you to continue. 

“My parents are complicated,” You continued, “they, well they kicked Winwin and I out at the end of the last school year…” 

Your father was furious the next morning, you’d never seen him this mad. Your hands were trembling in your lap as you listened to him yell at your brother. Your anger rising. 

“My deal fell through because you can’t keep your anger in check!” Your brother stayed silent as well, “Do you understand how much money we just lost, we’re all over the news our family name is ruined. They’re calling you a thug, what the fuck is wrong with you?” 

“He was coming on to me.” You finally said having enough, “H-he was trying to do things when I was saying no!” You yelled getting up. Your father turned his glare towards you. His eyes didn’t soften the way you expected them to. 

“He’s your boyfriend, isn’t he?” He asked his voice cold. Shock ran through your body at your fathers’ words. A business deal really meant more to him? You looked up at your mother who looked away from you. You blinked back tears as the rage in you rose again, you looked over at your brother who looked equally as shocked. His anger on his face. 

“You two need to get out of my house. I have to show the world that I don’t support your stupid behaviour and there will be consequences. You both are going to a different school and I will send you a fixed fund and pay for your tuition, but you will not stay at my house. I do not want to see your faces.” 

Doyoung listened intently as you told him everything, your hands fisting into your sweats as your anger rose inside you as you spoke. You couldn’t look at him though, you looked out the window. 

“And now you have to go see him because if you don’t, he threatens to not pay for anything?” Doyoung asked. You nodded still not looking at him. His hand reached out and grabbed your arm, but you flinched. His hand instantly shot away from you. 

“Baby, look at me.” He said keeping his hands to himself. You slowly turned your head to him; his face was angry. “That motherfucker that did that to you can rot in hell and your dad’s a greedy bastard. I’d say fuck it and don’t go but I understand why you have to.” He hesitantly reached for you again, this time you leaned into his reach taking his hand and pulling him towards you. “I – I can go with you if that would make you feel better.” He said. 

You’d done a lot of things to help you get over the incident, one of those things was trying to find a guy at the bar and fuck him, to prove to yourself that you had control over your own body that what happened with Dae, and your dad did not need to take over your whole life. That you did what you wanted, and you had control over what you wanted, you didn’t regret it either because somehow it got you to him. You pressed your lips to his kissing him slowly. You didn’t understand what you felt for him, but you knew that there was something because when you were around him you felt warm and safe, and free. 

---

You didn’t take Doyoung with you, but he told you that he’d have his phone on the entire time and that you could call him whenever. Getting out of your brothers’ car you both looked up at the huge house that you both use to call home. 

“I fucking hate him.” You mumbled to yourself and you both made your way up the few steps to the front door. Winwin pressed the doorbell and you both waited only a few seconds before your mother pulled the door open for you two. 

“Hello,” She said a tight smile on her face. “Please behave today, your father has put a lot of effort into making sure this day would come to be.” You were confused, you looked over at Winwin who mirrored your reaction. Effort into getting the two of you here? 

Your confusion vanished when you followed your mother into the sitting from and saw him. He sat there with a smirk, his body relaxed as he leaned back in a high back chair. His father sitting on a couch beside his mother. You looked around the room for your father, he was already looking at you with a fake smile on his face. 

“Welcome home kids.” 

--- 

You followed your father into his office, Winwin at your heels, he’d ushered the two of you to follow him as a deafening silence filled the sitting room for ten minutes as you all stared at each other. Your hands were sweating so much that you had to wipe them on your dress every few minutes. You were glad the dress was black. 

Your mother had finally ended the silence by announcing that the dinner was ready. Your father had ushered you after him the moment everyone had gotten up. 

As Winwin closed the door of the office you glared at your father. 

“What is th-”

He cut you off, “You will apologize to them after dinner, both of you. They agreed that the deal could be back on if you apologize.” You both balked at him. He didn’t allow either of you to speak before ushering you out of the room again. Both of you were too shocked to move still processing what your father had just said to you. When neither of you moved, he did, swinging open the door and walking out. You stared at your brother as he glared at the spot his father was standing in. 

“Fuck that.” He said and stormed after your father, you scrambled after him. 

“I don’t know what you thought was going to happen at this dinner, but the last thing we’re going to do is apologize to that fucking rat,” Winwin said stopping at the head of the long table as your father turned around and glared at him. The room was silent everyone staring at Winwin with wide eyes, even you were shocked. 

“And your inheritance? Your funds? Don’t forget your place kid. You will apologize.” Your father replied calmly. Your brother was fuming, taking a step forward until he was standing right in front of your father. 

“Fuck you and fuck your money.” 

Your father snorted. 

“How do you think your gonna afford your life boy?” 

“We’ll figure it out, we don’t need you.” You finally said taking your brother's hand and pulling him with you. You both left the large dining room, taking hurried steps towards the front door, both itching to be out the house. You pushed the front door open and walked out. 

“Go to the car,” Winwin said unlocking his car for you, “I have to grab something.” You nodded not questioning him and made your way to the car. 

You opened the door and got in, but someone caught the door as you pulled it. Dae leaned down into your space grabbing your face in his hand. His mouth a fraction away from yours, your nose was assaulted with the strong cologne he overused. 

“You think that you won?” he asked, “You didn’t, now you’re a broke bitch with nothing to your name. You’re a nobody.” You shoved him off of you kicking his shin as you did. He swore and let go of you backing up. He chuckled. “I heard about your new toy. I heard you suck his dick like a real whore would. So, it’s just me huh? It’s only a little bit before he gets bored of you. You aren’t enough and you never will be.” 

He slammed the door shut as Winwin bound out the house. You watched your brother as anger took over his features again as saw Dae

“See you on the ice motherfucker,” Dae said slamming into Winwin's shoulder as he passed him. 

“What did he say to you?” Winwin asked as he got into the car. You shook your head and looked away from him. 

“Let’s just go.” 

--- 

Three days and Doyoung hadn’t heard from you he’d called and texted only to be ignored. His head was spinning, he was feeling crazy. You weren’t his girlfriend, but he was losing it. His head ached as he stared at your contact. He felt lonely again his mind drifting to every place it shouldn’t go, every insecurity he’d developed lapping at him as he sat at the kitchen table. What happened? Did he do something wrong? Was it a mistake to tell you that he’d go with you? You hadn’t taken him after all, you hadn’t called him after and when he had called you, you’d ignored him. That awful feeling of abandonment hit him hard, his heart hurt and he couldn’t explain why. 

He got up stalking over to the cabinet and pulling out Jaehyun’s alcohol again. He didn’t need a shot glass he just opened the bottle and took a swing, the liquor burned as it made its way down his throat. He didn’t give himself time to think before he drank more. 

He wasn’t going to go see you, one because he couldn’t do that to himself this time not again, he couldn’t beg like he had with his ex. He also realized that he didn’t have a single clue where your dorm was. That realization also hurt because he’d let you into his life every inch of it, and the moment he found out something dark about you, you shut him out. He closed his eyes as he took another swing, no rational thought entering his mind as he did so. 

“Why do they ruin all my good places?” He muttered to himself as he grabbed his keys from the key holder, stumbling towards the door. 

“Hey what the fuck, Doyoung are you drunk?” Ten’s voice caught his attention as he opened the front door, cold hair hitting him as he did. 

“I mean I don’t know.” He replied, his words kind of slurring. Ten furrowed his eyes brows at him rushing to him as he did. 

“Were you going to drive?” He asked. 

“I mean maybe. I don’t know.” He replied. 

Ten narrowed his eyes at him and took his keys. Doyoung rolled his eyes and glared down at the boy. 

“Well fine then you gotta drive me, okay?” he said and grabbed Ten's arm pulling him out the house towards his car. 

“Why are you drunk on a Wednesday Doyoung, I thought you stopped this.” Ten said, Doyoung could sense the judgement in his friends’ words. But he’d expected it. His vision blurred as he leaned back into his seat, his head spinning from the alcohol. He closed his eyes and laughed. 

“Ten my man, it’s because I’m a fucking loser and everyone leaves me.” His head fell to the side as Ten started the car. 

“Take me to the indoor theme park.” He said and then laughed, “because I’m a sucker for a bad time.” 

A couple of minutes later Ten was parked in the parking lot, but the theme park was closed. Doyoung just nodded his head as Ten told him leaning his head into the window. 

“Did you really like her?” Ten asked, his voice soft. Doyoung shrugged. 

“Not that it matters now.” But he did, the answer was yes. He liked you around him, he liked your laugh, your smile, the ease you gave him. He liked that you spoke too much practically all the time and never really thought about what you were about to say. He liked how you made him feel, he liked that you didn’t make him want to drink. He liked you. 

Ten frowned, staring at Doyoung. 

“I’m not back to drinking like before,” Doyoung said quietly, he wasn’t able to look at Ten. “I just – I’m not back to drinking okay?” 

“Okay.” 

“Give me a couple of minutes and then we can go.” Ten nodded at Doyoung’s words and turned up the music. 

--- 

Doyoung was pissed, it had been a week and honestly, he didn’t give a fuck anymore, or at least he liked to tell himself that. He kept his word and didn’t drink, but that just meant that he was always angry, especially angry whenever he looked at Winwin. 

“We’re playing against your old school huh?” Doyoung heard Jaehyun ask Winwin. The other boy only nodded as he got into his gear. Doyoung ground his teeth and continued to get dressed. He wanted to be out on the ice bad, his blood was pumping, he needed to let the anger out one way or another. 

Halfway through the game, Doyoung was drenched in sweat, but his anger was coming down as he let himself be taken away by the sport. Adrenaline pumped through him as the whistle blew starting the third period. The other team got possession and Doyoung focused on defence. He kept his mind blank as he played only thinking about the game, Jungwoo checked the player with the puck, the puck going astray. Doyoung took his opening and claimed the puck, skating as he looked around for an open teammate to pass to. Seeing Winwin open he sent the puck down the ice in the same second he was slammed into the plexiglass. His ribs ached from the hit he slipped onto the ice and looked up at the guy who’d hit him, for some reason he was hovering over him still. 

“How are my sloppy seconds?” He asked, “The prude give you blue balls yet?” Doyoung’s head spun as he slowly got up, he was used to hits so his usual recovery time wasn’t this slow but, then again, he never was hit this hard. “But then again I heard that she sucks your dick like a prostitute.” But he wasn’t slow to understand what this fuck was saying. Taking his gloves off as he got up, Doyoung swung at the other man. His hands shoving him hard in the chest, before skating after him and grabbing his jersey. Doyoung didn’t think he just began to punch him, he was shoved back his helmet coming off as the other boy took his own helmet off. 

“Fuck you.” Doyoung spat, as the boy charged him, he got one good hit in. Straight to Doyoung’s jaw, before the refs were on them. Winwin was in front of him in seconds grabbing him from the ref. 

“Relax.” The younger boy said as the ref ejected both Doyoung and the other guy. 

“Let me go.” He said and shook Winwin off of him as he skated off the ice and went straight to the change room. 

--- 

He was under the spray of the shower when you walked into the locker room. The steam was filling the locker room, making the air hot as you quietly walked in his direction. He saw you before you spoke his eyes darkening as you leaned against the wall. 

“Doyoung.” You said his name softly, earning a glare from him. You deserved it; you’d let Dae’s words get to you. But now looking at him, taking the way he winced under the hot water the darkening bruise on his ribcage, the cut on his lip. You frowned. 

Dae was wrong. You looked at Doyoung, you knew whatever happened on the ice was because of you, and he’d done that even when you’d ignored him. 

“I’m sorry,” you said and took a step towards him. 

“For what? Ignoring me?  Or fucking with my head?” You didn’t reply just walked towards him, slowly getting under the water and letting your hands trace over his ribcage, your fingers skimming over the growing bruise. 

“For everything.” You said, letting your hand move up to his wet hair. The water soaked into your clothes as you pulled him into you, he let you. His arms looping around your waist. You looked up at him watching his face soften as he took you in. 

“Why’d you ignore me?” he asked. His breath fanning across your face. 

“Someone told me I wasn’t enough for you and I believed them.” Doyoung’s hands tightened, you closed your eyes and pressed your forehead against his. “I let my head get carried away with every insecurity I’ve ever had.” 

“I’m glad you came to your senses.” He said, his hand moving your shirt up so that his fingers could trace your skin. He pressed his lips to yours kissing you slowly as he moved your wet shirt up your torso. 

“Don’t ignore me next time.” He said moving his lips to your jaw, “Come talk to me instead.” You nodded and pulled out of his hold. Pushing him to the wall you ripped your shirt off over your head and quickly took off your pants. 

“Promise.” You said, “but we don’t have that long until the game ends.” looking up at him through hooded eyes, you pressed yourself against him again, you kissed his jaw, before moving down to his collar bone, taking the skin onto your mouth you gently bit it before running your tongue over it as he hissed. You kissed down his chest to the side of his ribcage pressing hot kisses down his wet skin. Until you got to his erection, he was hard and ready for you. You squatted down taking him in your hand as you looked up at him, he looked at you through half-lidded eyes as you slowly moved your hand up and down his length before pressing a soft kiss to the head. He groaned before letting his head fall back as he tangled his hand into your wet hair. 

“Babe,” He moaned as you took this tip into your mouth swirling your tongue around before moving him further into your mouth. Your hand working the rest of his cock as you continued to slowly move down on him. 

You stopped when Doyoung removed his hand from your hair and grabbed your wrist, you looked up at him again. His chest was heaving, and he looked at you like he was ready to devour you. 

“I love it when you give me head, but we really don’t have time for that.” He said moving himself out of your mouth. He pulled you up to him, his mouth joining yours again and his fingers trailed to your core. 

“So wet.” He said dragging a finger through your fold. Pulling his hand away from you he turned you around before turning around himself, your front against the cold wall, you moaned at the contrast. 

“Don’t take too long.” He said and lined himself up at your entrance. You moaned when he sank in his hands grabbing roughly at your ass before he started to thrust into you. You arched your back as you clenched around him, his cock twitching in you. 

“You’re so tight.” He moaned, his hand grabbing at your shoulder as his thrusts became harsher. You heard the buzzer of the game, indicating that the game was over. Your moans grew louder as the idea of the entire hockey team rushing in hit you. 

“Fuck,” Doyoung groaned his thrusts growing harsher, as you neared your climax. “You gotta cum now, pretty girl.” He said his arm winding around you so that his fingers could rub your clit. The added pressure pushed you along until your orgasm smashed into you. You moaned loudly as Doyoung continued to thrust into you, your muscles twitching around him pushing him to his climax. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” He panicked as he pulled out of you, using his hand to reach his orgasm. “We forgot a condom.” You turned around pushing his hand away and working him with your own until he came. You pushed your lips against him, both of you breathing erratically as you kissed. 

“What am I going to wear to get out.” You asked him pulling away from him. You both looked at your wet clothes. 

“I have an extra hoodie here, and I can look in Ten’s cubby he’s probably got sweats that will fit you.” 

He didn’t finish his sentence as the boys crashed into the locker room. Your eyes widened mirroring Doyoung’s. He quickly yanked you pulling you towards the line of toilet stalls. He shoved you in as the boys barked at each other not noticing the two of you yet. 

“Sorry stay here.” He said shoving his towel at your chest. 

“Dude why are you walking around naked?” You heard Mark ask as you wrapped the towel around yourself. 

“Because I can.” You hear Doyoung mumble back, his tone irritated. 

--- 

“You guys take forever in the change room.” You complained as Doyoung walked with you to the dorms. 

“My coach would have killed us.” He stated as he pulled you into him. “I’m sorry though that’s the only thing I could think of.” 

“Whatever it’s okay.” 

“So, I finally get to go up to your dorm huh?” He asked, and you nodded. 

“I would have brought you sooner, but I have a roommate who never leaves our room. I love her but damn is she anti-social. Getting her to that start of the year party was hard.” You explained as the two of you climbed the stairs. Doyoung looked at your ass as you walked up in front of him. It was hard not to. He was glad to hear that the reason for not seeing your dorm was because of something simple and not what he’d actually made it into in his head. You rounded out the stairwell pushing the door open into the hall of your floor. Doyoung froze as he realized what floor you lived on. A floor he’d been to many, many times last semester. 

“Doyoung?” He heard her voice before he saw, and dread set into him again. He snapped his head towards her direction as your hand slipped into his. His ex was staring at him, her eyes slightly wide as she took in his profile. The cut lip, the slightly swelling jaw. He frowned at her. 

“What?” He asked his voice cold. 

“Uh, what happened to you?” She asked. 

“None of your business.” He replied. She nodded. He watched her as she swallowed and hesitated again. He tightened his hand around yours again. 

“Uh yeah. D-do you think I could talk to you in private for a second?” she asked glancing over at you. 

“Whatever you have to say you can say in front of Y/N.” 

“Yeah, okay sure, you know I – I realized I never apologized to you.” She finally said. Doyoung was shocked, he was silent for a few seconds. He wasn’t sure if he heard that right. He was only snapped out of his daze when you tugged on his hand lightly taking his attention from his ex to you. You looked up at him with a soft expression on your face, you looked so wholly his. The way you were looking at him his heart clenched as he looked back at his ex. Somewhere along the way, he realized that he didn’t care about his ex anymore, he didn’t miss her or want her back. He was hurt sure but that was fading too. He knew he wanted to hear this and here it was, and it felt like he was being freed. 

“I forgive you.” She nodded her eyes filling with water. Doyoung turned away from her taking you into his arms. 

“Now show me where your room is baby.” He said smiling down at you. You smiled up at him and nodded pulling him with you towards your room. 

“It’s nothing special.” You said as you pushed the room door open. He didn’t look around as he closed the door behind him. Just pushed you onto your bed, kissing you. 

He wasn’t gonna let you get away from him. 

Not that you were planning on going anywhere.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading this, I really hope you guy enjoyed it! Please let me know what you guys thought, any opinions or comments you have on the story are very much welcome I love to hear from you guys so please don’t hesitate to let me know what you think. Additionally if you have any constructive criticism don’t  be afraid to let me know, I always want to get better so its welcome and appreciated. 

The next part to this AU will be Winwin so please look forward to that! and once again thank your for reading I really hope you liked it! 

[slashingdisneypasta]

Slashers Toy Story!AU

Or, *cough* a way for me to write out a buncha funny Incorrect Quotes and smoosh two things I love together.

Woody: Jason Voorhees

Buzz Lightyear: Michael Myers

Jessie: Ghostface

Prospector/Stinky Pete: Roman Bridger

Bo Peep and Ham: Freddy Krueger

Mr Potato Head: Chucky / Charles Lee Ray

Mrs Potato Head: Tiffany Valentine

Slinky: Carrie White

Rex: Bubba Sawyer

Barbie: Jennifer Check

Ken: Patrick Bateman

Lotso-'O'-Huggin' Bear: Sheriff Hoyt / Charlie Hewitt. Was gonna be Bo, but Hoyt just fits way better. Plus he has Thomas.

Chuckles: Monty

Big Baby: Thomas hewitt

The Chatter Telephone: Luda Mae Hewitt

Also, Sunnydale Daycare: Ambrose. Because why not.

*I'm thing the kids in Toy Story are the fanbase and creators of the Slashers in this AU. Like, Andy and Bonnie are the original creators that make up the canon stuff and created them to be the infamous characters we all know- and Sid is us fan-people that twist and distort the characters for our own pleasure, haha XD *

An abundance of Incorrect Quotes bellow the cut!

Chucky: *With all the features on his face mismatched*

Chucky: Hey Freddy, look! I'm Picasso!

Freddy: ... yeah, I don't get it. *Leaves*

Chucky: *what... * You uncultured swine!! *Shakes his fist at Freddy's retreating back. That was a good fucking joke, goddamn.*

~

Michael: *Writing down on whiteboard:* Excuse me... I think the word you're searching for is

THE SHAPE.

Jason: *Already so done with this edgy boy's bullshit*

Jason: *Moves attention to his own whiteboard, starts writing*

Jason: *Shows board*

NO. The word I'm 'searching for', I cant say, because there are preschool toys present.

*Gestures ferociously to Carrie and Bubba.*

~

Jason: *Ughhhh. Shows board that he frantically wrote on:* Its not a KNIFE! Its a little stick of plastic!!

Freddy: What's wrong with him??

Chucky: Knife envy~

Freddy: Ah been there

~

Jason and Michael: *Watching Dr Loomis give psychology advice*

Jason and Michael: *Slowly tilting their heads sceptically, in unison*

Michael: *Holds up board for Jason to read:* ... I don't think that man has ever been to medical school.

~

Jason: *Trying to get Michael to help him. Writes passive aggressively on board and shoves the thing in Michael's view:* Would you give me a hand!???

Michael: *Fucking slices his own arm off and chucks it at Jason*

Look, he's having a bad day...

~

Freddy: *Sneaks up on Jason and digs his fingers into the giants sides*

Jason: *Whips around and cracks Freddy in the face from shock*

Jason: *Realises its just Freddy as the other groans and holds his nose, and looks a little guilty. Oh, Freddy. Writes on board and shows him:* There's gotta be a less painful way to get my attention.

Freddy: Agh- Fucking- Merry Christmas, hockey puck!

Jason: *Catches sight of something above them, tilts his head. Writes and shows board:* Isn't that mistletoe?

Freddy: *A slow, creepy grin rips across his face* Yep.

~ Toy Stoy 2~

Jason: *Frantically holding up a board:* Michael! I was a yo-yo!

Freddy and Chucky: *Look at each other*

Chucky: 'Was'?

~

*Michael and the others watching a dude try to buy Jason and failing.*

Michael: *Thinking: Mm, now just walk away.*

Man: *Follows after where Jason went.*

Michael: *Thinking: ... the other way.*

~

*After Jason has been stolen- everyone is panicking*

Michael: *Stomping his foot, trying to gather these psychopaths' attentions. Wait a minute! Wait, hold on! When he semi has their attention, he shows a piece of paper with writing on it:* This is not time to be hysterical.

Freddy: Its the perfect time to be hysterical.

Bubba: *Gasp. Should we be hysterical!?*

Carrie: *Tries to calm Bubba down, a hand on his arm and voice gentle* No-

Chucky: Yes.

Michael: *Thinking: ... well, maybe*

~

Freddy: Give this to Jason when you find him

Freddy: *SMACKS MICHAEL UPSIDE THE HEAD*

Michael: ... *Holds up board* Alright. But I don't think it'll mean the same thing coming from me.

~

Freddy: *Up ahead* Hey guys! Why did the toys cross the road!?

Michael: *But rolls his eyes. Not now bacon bits.*

Bubba: *Perks up and waives. Oh! He loves riddles. Why?*

Freddy: To get to the chicken... on the other side!

*They all look out and celebrate, seeing where Jason was being kept hostage... but then realise how dangerous getting across will be as a giant fricken truck careens by and crushes a can the same size as them*

Bubba: ... *Promptly turns around and starts walking back the way they came. Oh well. We tried-*

Michael: *Grabs Bubba back*

~

Jennifer: I can help! I'm Tour Guide Jen!

Jennifer: Please keep your hands, arms and accessories inside the car, and no flash photography! Thanks.

Chucky: -I'm a married man, I'm married man, I'm married man-

Freddy: *Shoves Chucky out of the way* Then make room for the single fellas.

~

Michael: *Ugh. Writes on board:* They're on level 23.

Carrie: How are we gonna get up there?

Bubba: *Gestures to balloons, then up to the sky. Meaning: Maybe if we find some balloons, we could float to the top!*

Chucky: Are you kidding? I say we stack ourselves up, push the intercom, and pretend we're delivering a pizza.

Freddy: How bout a roast? *Grins*

Freddy: *Assesses Chucky and Carrie in turn* With tenderised pig and a slaughtered lamb as sides.

Chucky: Hold the fuck up did you just call me a pig- and a side-

Carrie: What?

Bubba: Oh! Oh! *Pats his chest excitedly. Do him! What about me??*

Freddy: ... Eh, you can be the toy that comes with the meal.

~

*Michael does something to get them all hurt and doesn't to care at all, of course. Just moves on.*

Chucky: Remind me to glue his mask on his head when we get back.

Freddy: *Nods, yep*

~

Chucky:*Embracing Tiffany after having been away saving Jason*

Glen and Glenda: You saved our lives! We're eternally grateful!

Chucky: Oh, fuck...

Tiffany: You saved their lives, Chucky?? Oh, my hero.

Tiffany: *Immediately drops Chucky in favour of picking up the babies* And they're adorable! Lets adopt them!

Chucky: *Thinking: What? No- Absolutely not- Don't say tha-*

Glen and Glenda: Daaaaddy!

Chucky: Fuck.

~Toy Story 3~

Jason: *Holds up a sign as he stands there menacingly with his machete:* You got a date with justice, Charles.

Chucky: Heh, too bad, 'sheriff'. I'm a married man.

Tiffany: *Comes out screaming, wielding goddamn nun chucks*

~

Michael: *Eyes narrow behind mask, slowly holds up sign he prepared earlier:* Bastard son of a hundred maniacs.

Freddy: Hah. That's Mr Bastard son of a hundred maniacs, to you!

~

*The toys/Slashers watch some toys, including Jennifer and her car get thrown in the donation bin*

Ghostface: Oh, man, poor Jen.

Freddy: ... I get the corvette.

~

Tiffany: Its alright, Jen, it'll be okay.

Jennifer: Well... Needy and I have been growing apart for a while...

Jennifer: Its just... I cant believe she would kill me!

Chucky: *Who's 'best friend till the end'/victim also killed him* Yeah. Welcome to the club, toots.

~

Hoyt: They just love new toys, don't they?

Chucky: Love!? We've been chewed, kicked, drooled on-

Tiffany: Just look at my nails!

Hoyt: ... Hm. Well, here's the thing, sweetheart. You aint leavin' Ambrose.

Tiffany: *Thinking: Oh fuck no he did not just- * Sweetheart!? Who do you think you're talking to!? I have over 10 kills, and I deserve more respec-

Hoyt: *Covers Tiffany's mouth with his hand* Ah, that's better.

Chucky: *Thinking: I'm going to fuck this douche up- * Hey, no one takes my wife's mouth. *Shoves Hoyt back off her by the chest* 'Cept me.

~

*Hoyt and Thomas bring Chucky back from 'The Box'. He's more fucked up looking then usual, sand all through his hair and stuck to his plastic features. He shakes it out of his pockets.*

Tiffany: *Gasp* Sweetheart!

Chucky: Eugh... it was cold. And dark. Nothin' but sand and a couple of Lincoln logs.

Freddy: Ehhh... I don't think those were Lincoln logs.

~

Ghostface: I was wrong...

Chucky:

Chucky: Ghostface is right. He was wrong.

~

Jennifer: *Fake cries*

~

Chucky: *Slaps a Pidgeon*

~

*Trying to reset Michael back to his former settings/self (The one that knows them and therefore will maybe-perhaps-possibly not kill them*

Freddy: Oh- oh- oh, here we go. there should be a little hole under the switch.

Jason: *Little hole little hold little hole- Nods. Got it!*

Freddy: To reset your Michael Myers action figure, insert paper clip-

Jason: *Sharply turns to Bubba, urging him to put his finger in the hole quickly*

Freddy: Caution; Do not hold button for more then five seconds...

Michael: *Suddenly stops thrashing and goes slack*

Everyone: ...

Bubba: *Jumps off him, holding up his hands. Its not my fault!!*

~

Michael, on Spanish Mode: *Gives Jason two sweet kisses on either cheek*

Jason: *Awkwardly, slowly holds up sign:* We gotta switch him back.

~

Ghostface: Oh! Mikey!!

Michael, still on Spanish Mode: *Sees Ghostface*

Michael: *Drops to his knees, gathers up Ghostface's hand*

Michael: *Looks up at Ghostface in utter awe and admiration*

Ghostface: *Freaken freaked out. Shouldn't he be the creepy one in this outfit? Leans away* Uhh... did you fix Michael?

Freddy: Uh, sorta. I mean I for one think this is a huge improvement.

~

Michael, STILL on Spanish Mode: *Does a dance of feelings around Ghostface, wanting to express himself*

Ghostface: What- why- please stop I'm gonna pee myself- Of laughter or fear I have no idea but I WILL PEE

Michael: *Grabs and dips Ghostface, and holds up a sign* We will be the most famous killers in history, together.

Ghostface: *Thinking: Oh I can get behind that, hell yeah- *

Jason: *Arrives*

Ghostface: Oh- *Scrambles out of Michaels hold* JASE!

Michael: *Watches them move on together* *Throws down the sign*

Freddy: I suddenly feel disgusting, like... I somehow ended up in some kinda... love-square, of some kind...

~

Jason: *Nicely gestures for Michael to give him some help*

Michael, stillllllll on Spanish mode: *Sniffs his nose at Jason's hand, shoving him out of the way with one arm like no thank you.*

~

Jennifer: Authority should derive from the consent of the governed. Not from the threat of force! // Or, alternatively which I think fits a whole lot better- // I am not going to stand back here and let another fucking old white guy tell me what the fuck to do!

Chucky and Freddy, two old white guys: *Look at each other*

Chucky:

Freddy:

Chucky and Freddy: *Shrug*

And that's it seeing as I don't really wanna see Toy Story 4. I hope you enjoyed this silly thing with me at least a little XD

Okay so I got a little attached in the end.

[whoacanada]

‘Wishful Thinking‘

Summary: Every NHL champion gets a single brush with ice magic. When Jack takes his first cup with the Falconers, he accidentally undoes the wish that brought him back from the brink of death in 2009, and Bitty becomes hell-bent on lifting the cup himself for a chance to set things right.

A/N: Finally posting some concepts I’ve played around with that aren’t 100% complete massive fics, but still pretty solid, just little things that might be enjoyed. Yet another cup-wish-gone-wrong-au with monkey-paw components. Also inspired by discord convos about canon!Jack meeting an older, veteran NHL!Bitty and having a lot of feelings. Also mentor/father-in-law!Bob trying to help Bitty navigate the NHL. There’s more to this floating around but this is the meat of it

____________

____________

Bob can sense when it happens. A shift of something monumental that he’s only felt on a handful of occasions his entire life. A quick glance across the ice finds a number of the celebrating Falconers looking around curiously, unsure of the sensation; for so many, it’s their first brush with ice magic. A pleasant novelty. The vets, though, they look to each other.

Bob turns and doesn’t have to look far to find his son, one hand clasped around the cup, the other around Eric Bittle’s waist, smiling from ear to ear. Something about the moment is wrong, but Bob can’t quite determine why as he’s overcome with a wave of nausea. The stadium lights are too bright and he blinks hard, face scrunching, trying to force whatever wrongness he’s feeling out of himself.

Someone’s made a wish.

The moment passes. Bob’s vision clears. There, veiled in a shower of blue and gold confetti, is Eric; alone at center ice, face twisted in confusion as he looks around for the man who only moments earlier had been in his arms.

“You take the cup, you get one real wish,” the decades old, bourbon-lacquered voice of his first coach reminds him. “But only the one. Can be something small, like an empty cab in the rain, or it can be something big. World changing, even. The one thing, the most important thing — ”

“No,” Bob breathes. “Please, no.”

“— You never use your wish on another player.”

____________

____________

____________

They don’t know exactly what Jack wished for, but the next time Bitty’s blades touch the ice, it’s as if he’s stepped into the body of a new man. No more slurs. No more targeted chirps. He’s just one of the boys.

He plays. He wins. Then, the offers start to come.

NHL teams looking for fast wingers, team players, leadership material; not one of them mentions diversity, or Eric’s status as the first out NCAA hockey captain. No one cares. No one remembers Jack, and no one cares about Eric.

The best and worst case scenarios rolled into one. If this is the reality Jack unknowingly traded his existence for, Bitty has no choice but to walk through the door his partner opened.

Bitty swallows, trying to force the words out on one of his now nightly calls with the man who would have been his father-in-law in another world, if the shared connection between them hadn’t been interred in a Montréal cemetery almost a decade prior.

“I think . . . I think he wished for acceptance.”

___________

___________

___________

“No one remembers anymore.”

Eric scuffs his skate against this ice, building up a small pile of shavings before scattering them again, focusing on the soft white as if somehow he’ll be able to transport himself bodily to somewhere cool and quiet. Jackson Hole. Banff. Tremblant. Anywhere but here. Anywhen but now.

“Saw Tater last week at a press junket. Blank stares all around. Some days, most days, I wake up and I don’t know how I got here. I can go without thinking of him.”

Weeks. Eric doesn’t say aloud. Months. Those hideous mornings when he wakes up beside a warm body and forgets they aren’t him. They aren’t supposed to be him. Was there ever even a him.

Jack. Eric mouths silently, just to remind himself. His name is Jack.

The details always slip. The universe constantly trying to correct the fallacy of Eric Bittle remembering a man who died before they technically ever met. Faded photographs and corrupted memory cards. Selfies that used to have two people in frame. Vlog posts with cosmic ADR, swapping Jack’s name for someone else’s like a hastily rewritten script. Eventually, even Eric’s memories turn traitor. First times lost to reshoots and post-production magic. Blue eyes are brown. Black hair is blonde. Jack becomes Phillip. Eric’s first love recast. In desperation, he pulls a page from Memento, finds a tattoo parlor and has ‘Jack Laurent Zimmermann’ inked in dark, unmistakable letters on his inner thigh. Adds a cup, the Falconers’ crest, and the date they lost everything. It works well enough until the name fades; there are still days where a hook up will ask why Eric has a championship tattoo for a team he never played with.

Now, all he has is Bob.

“That’s why I’m here.” Bob reminds. “That’s why we talk.”

“But what happens if we don’t.”

Bob’s familiar assurances rumble through the phone. Constant. Refusing to acknowledge the harsh realities of the passing of time. The ever-present doomsday clock moving them both toward disaster — Bob aging, Eric aging out. He’s good, but he isn’t great, and the only offers coming his way are single-season contracts with teams that haven’t sniffed a championship in years. One day very soon, there will be no more chances for Eric to undo what’s been done. No more favors to ask of teammates that have long since forgotten a world where Jack Zimmermann was a college graduate and a rookie MVP. Not just an addict. Not just dead at nineteen.

Eric listens to Bob ramble, asks him to tell him a story, to tell him about the Jack that Eric never really got to know. The Jack he can barely remember. A man that Eric has dedicated his entire life to honoring, to bringing back — from where he cannot fathom — and Bob obliges in a soft tone Eric imagines is not dissimilar from how he must have spoken to his son as a child.

Eric ignores his teammates rushing around him — tossing chirps and gentle insults about his ‘Sugar Daddy’ — and focuses on the accented voice in his ear; grasping desperately at the memory of a man who doesn’t exist. Pretending. Hoping.

__________

__________

Across the ice, Eric sees Kent Parson watching him. When they lock eyes, the aging star glides toward him, under a guise of one amicable captain greeting another. He’s pushing 37, and while the years of competitive play are starting to show, he’s just as viciously handsome as the day they first met. At least, Eric thinks he is. He can’t imagine a life where Kent Parson strolled onto a college campus and played beer pong at a frat party, but there’s a folder of old photos on Eric’s computer. Jack is in none of them, but there’s one of himself and Kent. Smiling.

Eric can’t recall why the image bothers him so much.

Parson used his wish years ago on something that he’s never bothered to share — and Eric’s far too much a gentleman to ask a man who was once a rival what he wasted his golden ticket on — but now, he’s slowing down, and this is supposed to be his farewell season. Going out with a bang, riding the high of his fifth cup win. He’s worked hard, and he deserves to shove the Penguins back down into obscurity for another season. Deserves it far more than Eric, with his selfish, single-mindedness that’s ruined god knows how many careers in the last decade between his own ruthlessness and Bob’s meddling.

Except. . . this is also likely Eric’s last season. His last chance to undo the great tragedy of his life, and Parson knows it.

“How you feeling, Peaches? You ready?”

Eric hates the nickname in the same way he hates when his father calls him ‘Champ’.

Eric fights his own shame because he wants to be honest, say, ‘No, I’m not ready, I’ll never be ready,’ but Eric can’t ask for what he wants, anymore. He wants the Aces to balk on a power play. He wants Parson to flub a pass and throw the game —  he even knows the man would probably do it, too — but Eric needs to come by a win honestly. They learned the hard way in 2022 when Eric hands were wrapped around the cup, wishing, praying, crying, pleading . . .

Clear eyes, full hearts, or some such bullshit.

Cheaters don’t get wishes.

“I can’t remember, anymore,” Eric admits as they square up across the face-off circle, the resigned terror of an inescapable end creeping upon him like the burn of an old injury ignored for far too long. “Kent. Please.” Parson leans down, rests his stick against the ice, and holds Eric’s gaze as if to say, I’m here. Trust me. Just play.

The puck drops.

________

________

________

There’s someone watching him, young, handsome with dark hair and the kind of bright blue eyes that scream ‘notice me’ with all of the biological bluntness of neon plumage and a mating dance. The man weaves through the crowd, unnoticed by Eric’s teammates, and comes close enough that Eric can’t help but assume familiarity. He must be a fan, the way he’s flushed and excitable.

Eric’s drunk enough on the moment that he’s happy to indulge his baser instincts. He also literally can’t remember the last time he brought company home and if there’s ever been a night to get laid, it’s this one.

“Crisse, look at you, Bits.”

The man is caught between being awestruck and simply struck, reaching out to touch Eric’s arm but not quite making contact, like his depth perception is the tiniest bit off. He drops Eric’s old nickname so easily, so earnestly, that for a moment Eric thinks they might already know each other — but that’s impossible. Eric would remember someone so handsome, so very much his type.

“Only my friends call me ‘Bitty’.” Eric cautions, raising his half-empty champagne bottle in a mock toast and flashing his best ‘you’re coming home with me tonight’ smile. “But I’m more than happy to to get acquainted with you, Sugar.”

Eric isn’t usually this forward, this unrestrained. Tonight, it doesn’t matter, he’s celebrating: another championship, the end of a career, a life well lived. It’s to be expected. What isn’t expected is how the man’s relieved smile falters; as if Eric’s unbridled joy is somehow misplaced.

“Bitty? It’s me.”

“And ‘me’ is called . . . ?”

On very few occasions in Eric’s life has he been able to witness true devastation first-hand; and those instances were related to deaths, hockey losses, or blackout morning afters.

“Jack.” The man says softly, face slack with surprise. “It’s. . . Jack. Bitty, you know me.”

“If we’ve met before, I’m sorry,” Eric apologizes, hating to see the kid look so defeated. “I meet so many people — ”

Over Jack’s shoulder, Eric catches sight of Bob Zimmermann and waves, delighting in the way Bob’s face lights up when he catches sight of Eric, practically going supernova when he notices Jack as well, crossing the ice like a man possessed; Bob moves to pull them both into a hug but Eric’s new friend holds up a defensive hand and Bob stops mid-gesture.

It’s extremely apparent something is off, and between the reporters, the confetti, the champagne, and the fans, Eric is missing all of the context clues.

“Just won my last cup,” Eric singsongs, gesturing with the bottle between his mentor and the man Eric would very much like to fuck — who look very similar now that Eric can see them side by side. “Everyone’s super excited, right? Yeah? So, what’s going on. Did someone die?”

“No.” Bob says quickly, eyes flicking between Jack and Eric warily. “No. Not . . . that.”

“Severely injured?”

“. . . Non.”

“Okay, then, we should be celebrating!” Eric throws his arms wide and nearly clocks a passing teammate. “No more party pooping, Bobbert. Speaking, this is my new friend, Jack. Jack, Bob, Bob, Jack. Though, I’m getting the feeling you two might know each other. Or might be . . . related.” Eric gasps and smacks his free palm against his forehead. “Oh my god, the Tremblant retreat? Is that where I know you from? Listen, I was fucked up on pain meds that whole weekend, I am so sorry if we’ve already met.”

Despite Eric’s continued attempts at clarifying their shared mystery past, Jack keeps looking at Bob with that same wounded expression and it’s really killing Eric’s buzz.

“Bob.” Eric redirects. “Help me, here. Cutie’s nervous.”

“Eric, this is my, ah, well,” Bob’s smile is so forced, so tense, it looks more like a grimace. “Well, this is my son, Jack.”

There is only one ‘Jack’ Eric has ever known in relation to Bob Zimmermann, and he is not someone to be mentioned in polite conversation.

“Your son?” Eric echoes slowly. “Your son, Jack.”

Bob realizes what Eric’s tiptoeing around and casts a furtive glance toward the younger man, lifting two fingers to his cheek conspiratorially to imply ‘it’s a long story, not meant for public ears’. Eric knows how to play along.

“Wow, okay, did not expect that, but now that you’re saying it, I can one-hundred-percent tell. You have the same, well, everything.”

Eric takes Jack’s hand for an obligatory shake, not missing the way Jack’s features twist up into something caught between flattery and misery, before staring down his pseudo-mentor.

“My question is this, where have you’ve been hiding him — because how long have I know you, Bobby? Shame.”

“I’ve been . . . away.”

Jack’s tone is weighted with context Eric absolutely does not possess, but can definitely read into. Given the age difference and Alicia’s conspicuous lack of attendance this evening, Jack’s definitely a love child from some 90s Zimmergroupie. Or, original Jack didn’t actually OD and Bob spirited away his kid to keep away the prying eyes of the public; but that wouldn’t explain the age difference or the shared name.

Oh, Bobbert.

“Couldn’t wheel him out too soon,” Bob jokes, but Eric can tell the man’s heart isn’t in it, reinforcing Eric’s suspicion.

“Well, I’m happy you did,” Eric says graciously, trying to smooth over the awkwardness. “He’s very handsome, when he isn’t doing this Eeyore impression.”

“Just like his father,” Bob says reflexively —  defensively —  as Jack goes pink. “Eric, will you excuse us for a moment? Back in five minutes, tops.”

Eric offers a gracious wave, gaze lingering on Jack’s retreating back — and backside, bless — watching Bob rest a firm hand on his son’s neck, gripping tightly to lean in and furiously whisper something. As Eric watches, Jack looks back over his shoulder; it’s not the fond glance of a potential paramour. Regret, maybe? Grief, definitely.

He must be as disappointed to be cock-blocked by his father as Eric is.

Across the ice, Kent Parson has rushed Jack, gathering him into a crushing embrace that the younger man returns easily —  burying his face against Parson’s pads; pulling back only when Parson grabs Jack’s shoulders to push him away, taking a long look at him, holding his face between his hands briefly before pulling Jack back into his arms.

They don’t just look like old friends, it’s a reunion of desperation, like the videos his mother sends of soldiers coming home from war, but before Eric can think better of it, a teammate fists a hand in the collar of Eric’s sweater and pulls — away from Bob’s forlorn love child and forgotten first meetings — and the night goes on.  

Bob doesn’t return. Neither does Jack.

Eric doesn’t even notice.

__________

__________

[acourtofsnakes]

Cabur - Rogue, Chapter 6| The Mandalorian x Force Sensitive! Reader (f)

Summary: A few weeks have passed and after landing on a small planet to collect a bounty, you and Mando decide to take a little trip to the market to stock up on some things. Nothing will come up here.. right?

Warnings: Angsty angsty annnnngst, (Sorry, I don’t mean to be so horrible to dear reader), Swearing (mild), brief mentions of death, touching on the same things as chapter 4 but not as heavy but I’ll still add the trigger warnings ♥︎ These chapters will get lighter, I promise,

Not beta read, I wanted to get this one out because I love it so apologies for any mistakes, I’ll be going in to edit a little later

Trigger warnings: Anxiety, horrible thoughts/insults, triggering comments maybe, thoughts of not being able to cope. 

Words: About 6210

AN: Okay, okay, so, I was listening to my Rogue playlist on Spotify (link coming soon) and a certain song came on that just fuelled this chapter. SO, I highly recommend listening to Leave A Light On by Tom Walker if you want the vibes for this chapter. Just… honestly, please do it (I may have had tears)

As always, credit to whoever owns the gif. I usually find them on Google or Pinterest, so message me if it’s yours ♥︎

Rogue Taglist:  @snipskixandbeskar   @weirdowithnobeardo @the-bottom-of-the-abyss

Rogue Masterlist | Introduction| 1: Solus| 2: Arir | 3: Tor | 4: Gaa'tayl | 5: Kyr’am | 6: Cabur |

Mando’a translation: Cabur - Protector or Guardian

A few weeks had passed since that night you saved the Mandalorian’s life, since he threw away the bounty puck to keep you safe. 

You’d stayed that night grounded, and then when Mando was able to get up in the morning, he flew you off of that dump of a planet. 

He didn’t ask anymore but how you had managed to save him. Whether he knew you were lying or not, he hadn’t pushed it, choosing instead to respect you. Kind of like how you respected him and his Creed. 

You’d fallen into a sort of routine around the Razor Crest, without either of you realising it. Mando would fly the ship, and you could be found seeing to Grogu and Duru, or tidying things up. Sometimes you would clean the weapons in the cabinet, making sure they stayed in pristine condition. 

Now and then, Mando would head out to get a bounty and when he got back, he would let you help patch him up. You never saw his bare skin, respected that. You would look away or close your eyes, pointing out the best things to use or how to administer them. The man was good at first aid, but his answer to everything was to shove the cauteriser on it. So, when you had been passing through some shops one day, you had stocked up on medical supplies, even found a shop selling the same herbs and plants that your mother had taught you about. 

You’d even been on a few of the hunts with him. 

Of course, you had argued first. When you’d asked him about it one day on the way out of Nevarro, Mando had simply said no. 

Which had immediately riled you. You were not a girl who liked that word. You despised that word. 

Which is how you’d spent the whole night and next two days bickering, over the question of your safety. When he lost that front, (“Seriously, Mando? I’m a fugitive. And after all, I’ve got a big, strong Mandalorian to protect me”) the Mandalorian had moved on to your lack of thinking before throwing yourself into the firefight.

He lost that one too. 

(“Says the man who stole back a child surrounded by Stormtroopers.”

“You’re not coming. End of.”

“Did you want me to bring your pulse rifle over?”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“You’re right. Pulse rifle and an extra blaster.”

“I hate you, you know that?”

“Sure you do, Lori. I’ll see you at the ramp.”)

That nickname had slipped out by accident, and he’d regarded you, for a long time. He’d gone still, and you almost swore you heard a hitch of breath through his helmet and then he just nodded and murmured softly, “See you down there.”

There had been a lot of little moments like that but they were so fleeting that you were almost convinced you’d imagined it. You were imagining a lot of things lately. 

Sometimes, when you were walking through forests or towns, you thought you spotted something lingering at the edges of your vision. 

A tall figure, cloaked in a hood that was embroidered in either silver or gold, depending on the light. 

You’d even asked Mando about it a few times, but he hadn’t seen anything so you simply put it down to a trick of the light or sleeplessness, nightmares still plaguing you now and then. 

Regardless of the nightmares and your vision playing tricks on you, you were doing… okay. You were warm, safe, had a comfy place to sleep. You had things to keep you busy, things that weren’t hunting for food or a good spot to hunker down in for the night. 

Duru was happy too, having become fast friends with Grogu and the two of them ran rings around you and the Mandalorian. Well, mainly Mando, which you found hilarious because he was such an exasperated dad with them both. 

It was a rare reprieve from your life, letting you slow down and… live. Rather than survive. 

~~

“I do not talk in my sleep.” 

“Yes, you do!! Sometimes, I think you’re awake but you’re just having a fully-fledged conversation with your blanket.” 

“Oh, shut up. I know I don’t talk in my sleep, tin can. You were probably just having dreams about me again.” You examined the fruit in front of you, then handed over a few credits to the kind vendor, slipping the fruit in your bag. 

The sound of fabric hitting the floor sounded from behind you, and you turned to see that the Mandalorian had dropped the bag you’d made him carry. “I do NOT have dreams about you!” He stooped to pick up the bag, then rose to see you standing with your hands on your hips, eyebrow raised and that damn smirk on your lips. 

“Mmhm, is that why you always have to pull something over your lap when I wake you up?”

He stared at you, and you had the very correct feeling that he was looking at you in mild shock, too caught out to come up with his usual cocky response. “I -you.. That’s completely..”

You burst out laughing, rolling your eyes at him and then dropping him a wink, “Come get me when you’ve thought of a response, Lori.” You turned and carried on walking through the market. 

The two of you had stopped off on a nearby trading planet, to gather supplies. Mando had recently secured a bounty with your help and it had paid well, giving you enough extra credits to stock up and treat yourselves. Grogu was already half-way through a packet of blue macarons, which would no doubt come back to bite you both later when he was pelting through the ship whilst you tried to catch him. And it would be your fault because you had taken one look at those big ears and eyes, determined not to break but when the little womp rat had cooed at you… Of course, he had gotten his own way. 

It felt good, to wander a market and not be scrounging for things under the cover of a hooded cloak. You still had one on, you couldn’t bear to part with this item, the most beautiful piece of clothing you had ever had. You just didn’t have the hood up disguising you. 

A gift, from Mando. 

The first time you went out with him after the puck was destroyed, Mandalorian had insisted you wear yours. However, it had been covered in his blood from his injury, and you couldn’t get it out, no matter how hard you had tried. It hadn’t bothered you that much, though you were.. not sad as such, but it felt a little strange because it had been one of your few possessions for so long. But, maybe it was a symbol. That things had changed, and that was in the past. 

A couple of days later, you had just walked into the cockpit when you noticed there was a package on your seat. When you picked it up, it was squishy, bound in a sort of thick papery material and tied with a length of string. 

You’d glanced at the Mandalorian, who was watching you, the picture of calm but his hands had been fiddling with something on his belt, a shockingly nervous gesture you weren’t used to. 

That simple, uncertain gesture had risen your pulse and you unwrapped the package, trying not to show how your hands were shaking at the first gift you’d received since being a child. 

A gift from the Mandalorian. 

Pulling away the paper had revealed a mass of fabric, a blue so deep it was almost the same colour as the night sky. You’d lifted it out and it had unfolded and revealed itself to be a new cloak. The material was soft, thick enough to keep out a biting chill. You’d made a noise of awe and surprise, but had immediately fallen in love with it, pulling it on. It fell to about the middle of your calves and secured at the base of your neck with a small silver clasp. 

The inside was lined with a thin layer of heat-reflective material, and when you’d run a hand over it, Mando had finally broken his silence, “I noticed you were always cold, even if you had layers on so I.. wanted to make sure you weren’t cold anymore..” 

You swore you could almost feel the heat creeping up his neck, and that softened you. He was nervous about giving you this cloak, like he didn’t know how you would take it. 

You had smiled at him, a soft smile that made your eyes glitter like the surrounding stars and placed a hand on his knee lightly, “Thank you, Lori. I adore it, I truly do.” Then you’d spent the next minutes admiring it, putting the hood up and realising it shielded your face in shadow. 

So, naturally, you had moved around the cockpit and upper level like a phantom, pretending to be a shadow in the night. 

You’d even earned yourself a laugh from the great wall of beskar that was fast becoming your friend.  It was only a soft chuckle, just picked up by the vocoder, but all the same, it had lit something within you. 

It still echoed in your ears now. 

A few moments later, the Mandalorian was back at your side, Grogu in his little bag and Duru walking next to him. “The point still stands. I thought I might finally get some silence at night, but you talk just as much.” His raspy voice had a softened edge, one of teasing and you might even have heard the hints of a smile playing at his lips. 

You turned to look at him over your shoulder, “You love it when I talk. I have to talk to you, otherwise I’d be worried you had turned to stone. You’re so quiet sometimes.” You stopped at a stall, admiring the fabrics here – not to buy, just to look at the different things in a place you had never seen before. 

The Mandalorian made a soft noise, “No, sweetheart, that’s just called quiet time. You might want to try it sometime.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but something behind Mando caught your eye. Rising up on tiptoe, you peered over his shoulder… but there was nothing there. Weird. You could have sworn you saw someone wearing a hood just… watching you. 

You shrugged, assuming you had imagined it like before and then looked back to the man before you, “I can be quiet. I just choose to fill your hours with my wonderful voice.” You flashed him a grin, eyes dancing. 

A voice cut across before Mando could talk to you, “You.” It was a snarl, tinged with recognition that wasn’t exactly the most positive. It was bitter, aggressive and almost… pained. 

Mando turned quickly, his hand flying toward the blaster on his hip, instinct overriding him. His movement allowed you to see who had just interrupted the conversation. 

A lady stood there, with curly magenta hair twisted up into a braid. She had tattoos along her neck, and her eyes were a shocking green. She was breathing quickly, staring at you with such disdain that it made your neck prickle. 

How did you know this woman? You’d never been to this planet before.

You blinked, holding up your hands as a surrender gesture, “Uh… I’m sorry but I don’t know you. I think you must have me confused with someone else…”

The lady shook her head fiercely, making the whisps of her hair that had escaped bounce wildly. “No. I do not have you confused. I would know you anywhere.” Her eyes were wild with fury, pinning you to the ground with just a stare. 

“I’m sorry, but I really don’t know who you are. Maybe you could tell me your name?” You extended a hand, trying to diffuse this situation and help the woman understand that you aren’t who she thinks. 

She flinched back from your reach, even though she was still a good few feet away. “How dare you. You don’t even know who I am?” She made a noise of disgust, looking you up and down in such a way that you were surprised the skin didn’t flay from your bones, “Typical. I don’t know why I’m surprised. She was probably just another tool to you, wasn’t she? Another person to use and discard like trash.”

You blinked, your hands dropping to your sides. Your skin began to tighten, your blood turning a little frosty. You looked to the side, seeing a few people start to stop and watch this altercation happen. 

The Mandalorian seemed to pick up on this at the same time as you. He turned more toward the lady, his hand still within reach of his blaster, “Why don’t we take this somewhere more private?”

The woman barely even looked at him, “Don’t get involved in this, Mandalorian. You’re just as bad as she is. At least to do what you do, you have to have respect and creed. You have morals, no matter how murky they are.” She jabbed a finger at you, “Unlike this savage monster.”

Your breathing immediately shallowed, getting a little unsteady as she spat out that word, that hateful word that followed you around and hounded at your feet. “I’m sorry? For whatever I’ve done, I’m sorry if it’s hurt you. I didn’t mean it, truly-”

She laughed, a cold and cruel laugh, but her eyes were slowly turning glassy with tears. She took a few steps closer, “You don’t even remember her name, do you? Shall I remind you? Help you distinguish her from your kill list?” 

You didn’t fail to notice the way the Mandalorian’s stance shifted. His body tightened and he stood closer, shielding you slightly with one of those ridiculously broad shoulders. He was going on the defensive, feeling the situation start to spiral. 

The woman barely spared him another glance, “3 years ago, you showed up on Trask. You stumbled around the market for a few days, bleeding from a wound in your leg and you passed out.”

Realisation was beginning to filter through you. It sparked in your mind and you remembered a dark street and rain, your leg heavy and cumbersome beneath you. It had burned like fire and when you went down, you couldn’t get back up again. 

The woman was still talking, “Someone picked you up, took you to their home. My sister. She was there for work, and saw you lying in the street, like some kind of dumped animal. She nursed you back to health, gave you somewhere to stay.” She could see it as it began back to you, “You took her aid, her comfort and then, there was a warning put out in the village. There had been a high-risk fugitive spotted in the village. Anyone with information was to come forward immediately.”

Your hands curled into fists, your chest shuddering as guilt and darkness began to swirl within you, “Stop.” 

She chose not to hear your quiet plea, “I was supposed to meet her. But she sent me a comms message. She would meet me, but she would have someone else with her. Someone who she couldn’t tell me over a comms message. Someone in trouble. People said this girl was dangerous, to be handed over with no hesitation but she didn’t see that. No, she said this girl was terrified, that she just wanted to live.” She tilted her head, walking closer again, “But the next day, this special little girl was gone. And then the Imperials came.” Her voice shook, her expression unreadable. 

You shook your head mutely, not wanting to hear this, memories flooding your brain. 

“Someone had tipped them off that my sister was harbouring a fugitive. They tore through her home, destroyed it and dragged her in for questioning. They demanded she tell them, beat her when she denied it. She never gave it up.” 

The woman was right in front of the Mandalorian now, who extended his arm out, ‘That’s close enough.” 

Nausea roiled your stomach, and you weren’t sure if you were going to pass out or throw up. There were too many eyes on you, too many people watching as this woman revealed you bit by bit. 

The woman lowered her voice, deadly soft and it shook, but carried in the silent square, “My sister was murdered because of you. Because of what you are.” 

Mando froze, his head tilting back to look at you slightly. You still hadn’t told him. 

She wasn’t done. “They told me a few weeks ago that you’d been captured by a Mandalorian. I wept with relief that day, because I knew the Mandalorian wouldn’t fail. You’d be taken to whoever wanted you, and you would finally repent for every single sin you’ve ever committed. Your life is littered with them. My sister, my beloved sister is dead because of you. A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red, girl, and they will always be stained red. I admit, I’m disappointed that you slithered into his head with your poison too but you will kill him too and then… You deserve everything that will ever come to you. And more.” The woman was breathing almost as quickly as you, her eyes glinting in sick delight at the pain she was causing you. 

My sister is dead because of you. 

A beast.

Her words mingled with that seductively dark voice in your mind and you gasped for a breath, knives feeling like they were digging into your lungs. Your eyes darted around, noted the strangers looking at you with horror and that shared disgust. A father pushed his daughter behind his legs as he caught your stare, hissing at you. 

A flinch ran down your body and without a second thought, you turned tail and bolted. The sunlight was too bright, obscuring your vision harshly and making you stumble every now and then. 

You were distantly aware of a male’s shout, then a harsh thumb and the Mandalorian’s voice snarling, “Stay down.” He stopped to check your pursuer was down and then he was running after you. “Hey, wait.”

You ignored him, boots pounding into the dust as you ran through the market, needing to get out of this place, get away from her and the memories. Where the hell was the ship? It was right here a minute ago. I haven’t gone the wrong way. This is the way we came. 

You could still hear Mando behind you, knew he was hot on your heels. “Drop it, Mando.” You led him around people and stalls, knowing if wanted to be in front of you, he would be. He was letting you flee, stopping anyone coming after you. 

Dodging around a crate of fruit, you almost sobbed. There it was, the Crest, gleaming in the sunlight. You slowed down as you reached it, stopping a little way away to let the ramp come down, let you inside to sanctuary. 

Nothing happened. 

Bastard. 

You took a breath, trying to get past the tightness in your lungs, “Let me in.”

“No. Not until you tell me what’s going on.” His voice was firm, arrogant, in a way like he knew best and you’d listen to him. 

~“A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red.”~

Your hands curled into fists at your sides, staring at the Crest, at where the ramp was tucked in tight. Your heart was pounding, not from the run, but from the realisation that no matter where you went, there would always be someone you had touched with that curse. “No. I’m not telling you anything. I don’t owe you anything.”

He laughed behind you, but it was a cool laugh, nothing humorous in it, “I’m not saying you owe me anything, princess. But some woman just cornered you in the street and spat abuse at you. I thought I would be prying you off of her, not chasing after you.” 

A wolf. No. A beast.

You spun round, eyebrow raised, “Because I’m some wild animal that would rather fight than talk my way out of a situation?” 

If he had no helmet, you would have seen him blink, “No, I’m not saying that. But, well. You have to admit it, don’t you?”

Something was beginning to prickle up the back of your neck, his words threatening to cut a little close, “Admit what?” Venom laced your tone and you tensed, as if bracing for a punch.

The Mandalorian walked closer, oozing confidence like he somehow knew you better than you knew yourself, “You don’t really think, do you? You never calculate the risks of a fight. You just jump straight in with no regard for your own safety. I mean, when I came for you on Sorgan, anyone smart would have seen a Mandalorian and run.” He wasn’t saying it in an arrogant way, he was saying it as fact. And he was right. A Mandalorian appeared on the street and you turned around and crossed to the other side. You didn’t engage him a fight and flirt with him. 

A cold laugh rocked though you and you tilted your head, “Anyone smart? So you’re calling me stupid now? Is that it? Beast or stupid?” You took a few steps closer to him, ignoring the villagers milling around that had started to look, having heard the fight in the centre of the market. “Don’t you dare tell me I don’t calculate risks. You think I’ve had time to calculate risks in my life? I don’t have time to sit with my little notepad in my ship and jot down the pro’s and con’s of engaging in battle. I didn’t have the luxury of being trained like you.”

Bitter astonishment filled the Mandalorian’s voice, his own body going rigid, “The luxury of training?! You think I chose to become a Mandalorian? That I woke up one morning and skipped along to Mandalorian school?” His voice rose, the rough rasp turning to stone with every word.

You observed him with a steely gaze, something in you needing to push him away, to protect yourself before he got too close. So, you aimed for what you knew would work, his Creed. Your eyebrows rose, looking him up and down as you leaned your weight on one leg, “You’re telling me you weren’t born with that thing already stuck on your head?” Spiteful sarcasm dripped from your voice and you pointed up at his helmet. 

The Mandalorian let out a snarl that no doubt usually sent normal people running. He stalked toward you with predatory grace, a hunter toward his prey.  “Don’t you dare.” Like he read in your eyes where you were going with this. 

Ugly triumph filtered though you as you stood your ground, not afraid of him, “It’s all the same with you Mandalorians, isn’t it. You have all your training, don your shiny armour and suddenly you’re better than anyone. That helmet goes on, you don’t have to face the consequences of what you’ve done. No one knows who you are, so you don’t need to take the blame.” These words were spiteful, beyond cruel and you hated yourself more and more for each one, but he was starting to get into the cracks, starting to see you. You couldn’t see him die. 

Mando was right in front of you now, towering above you with all his broad-shouldered posture, frustration roiling off of him in waves. “You think I don’t feel remorse for what I’ve done?” His voice was so low, barely leashed. 

You nearly purred, tasting the promise of a fight, even if it did twist a knife into your heart. “I’ve never seen it.” You tilted your head back to look up at him, letting every ounce of spoilt, cruel brattiness melt into your expression. 

A soft growl rumbled through the helmet, so muted you barely heard it in the noises of the market behind him. 

Yes. Yes.

And then he relaxed, his shoulders eased and his hands uncurled. 

What? No – Disappointment, maybe even shock registered on your expression. You’d been sure, so sure that aiming for his beloved Creed would get him to fight you. Why hadn’t it worked?

Mando shook his head, the sunlight bouncing off of the shiny metal, “No. I’m not doing this with you. You can’t push me away, no matter how hard you try. You don’t mean anything that you just said, I can see it in your eyes.” He pressed a button on his vambrace, and the ramp opened behind you. 

He saw you. 

That dark beast was starting to awaken, its ears pricking up. You needed to get out of here, away from him, away from this, now. You just shook your head, turning around and walking up the ramp, watching Duru as she ran ahead of you. 

Footsteps sounded from behind you as the Mandalorian followed you. He took Grogu from his little pouch, popping him on a cargo crate and Duru immediately jumped up next to him. “Don’t walk away from me. I’m trying to help you, but you keep shutting me out. Why did that woman say those things about you?” His gloved hand enveloped your wrist, his grip not tight or authoritative, but it began to break something in you. 

“Let me go, Mando. I mean it.” You let ice creep into your tone, trying to disguise the cracking inside you, the darkness that was beginning to stir and whisper. 

And the damn tin can saw it all. Your back was to him, but he still fucking knew, “Please… You know I would never judge you for it, for whatever you did to make her say that.”

Excuse me?

Anger flared through you now, igniting into a blaze and you snarled, “Whatever I did?!” You didn’t give him time to respond, not before you swung around, using his grip on your wrist for leverage. You had spent enough time around him now to become familiar with the plates of his armour, so you knew you aimed correctly when your fist connected with the side of his ribs between the front and back plates. 

He grunted, jolting a little but he still didn’t let go. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that. I only meant-” His voice had softened and, in your rage and hurt, you mistook the pleading tone for a condescending one. 

Before he could finish, you punched him again, harder, “Don’t. Don’t try to start spewing excuses at me. I knew perfectly well what you meant. You thought that she had been hurt by me. That I killed her sister with my own hands. Probably slit her throat and bathed in her blood.”

“No, no, I didn’t. If you would just listen to me and stop shouting, please-“

Your foot connected with his shin, making him stumble backwards. You followed after him, “You didn’t even stop to think that maybe, for once, I didn’t actually do anything. But no. Like always, you looked at me and saw the worst. You assumed that I was a monster.” You chopped down at his inner elbow this time, causing him to let go of you in reflex. 

Mando tilted his head, his voice coming out sharper this time, “I assumed?” He laughed, the bastard laughed, “What else am I supposed to do, sweetheart? You’ve been on this ship for nearly a month now and I still don’t know anything about you. So yes, I was wrong for assuming, but can you blame me?”

Your eyes flashed and you were on him again, “So it’s my fault that you thought I was a monster? You’d met me for all of two seconds on Sorgan and started whispering in my ear like honey, that death followed me wherever I went. There was a bounty over my head and that’s all you saw.” 

Mando went still, his shoulders tightened, and his voice came out lower, “You’re still bringing that up? I told you that you weren’t my bounty anymore.”

Before you could answer him, that velvety voice inside your head started to whisper in your ear, “Oh no, oh my sweet darling. He sees you. The real you.  He knows you’re a monster.” 

You shook your head sharply, lifted your eyes back to the Mandalorian’s stupid face. Helmet. Visor. Whatever. “I’m not your bounty but you believed that woman. So say it.”

His confusion was palpable, “Say what?”

You took a step forward and your chest butted up against his, “Say it! Say that I’m a monster. A murderer. I kill everything I come near.” You laughed, coldly, the words coming out with your voice but in your head, they were being repeated in that cruel, silken whisper. “You regret it, don’t you? Throwing away my puck. You wish you’d kept it, then you could get rid of me, be free of what I’ve done, why I’m being hunted.” Those steel bands were still wrapped round you, crushing you, swallowing you whole again. 

Something broke in him, his composure as the anger rose again and he leaned down to you, “Stop.” The command was a growl and he lifted a finger, pointing at you, “You’re a fucking hypocrite.” 

Yes. Yes, fight back, fight me. Tell me what I know I am. 

You raised your eyebrows, smirking at his finger and then back up at him but your expression was bitter, “Am I? Why’s that, Mando?” You tilted your head and practically purred, “Tell me.” 

The tension in the room was tight, the air almost crackling around you with this outburst of emotion, the threads of your entwined lives pulling taut. 

The light bounced off of the plates on his shoulders, betraying his slightly ragged breathing, “You just screamed at me for assuming the worst about you, yet you did just that to me. How can I want to be free of you, when I don’t even know who you are.” He lifted his hands to your shoulders, to try and calm you down, to push you away maybe. 

The smirk began to slip from your face, “Does it matter who I am?”

His grip tightened, “Of course it does. Because you’re not a bad person. Let me help you, please. Just tell me something. Anything.” His voice turned pleading, and he lifted a hand from your shoulder, like he was going to cup your cheek. 

You’re not a bad person.

Fire blazed within you again, protective and destructive. This was too close. He was getting too close. You had to stop it, now. You had to get away. 

You reached up, grabbing his wrist and using the element of surprise to slam him against the wall behind him, pinning his wrist there and then your blade was at his neck, dull light glinting off of it, “Back off. You can’t help me. I’m not some broken doll to add to your ragtag collection.” Your own breathing was ragged, coming in sharp pants as the room started to spin. 

The Mandalorian flinched, like you’d hit a nerve and his free hand moved. Bingo. 

Yes, you thought, almost begged, Punch me. Fight me, please. 

But he didn’t. He just curled his fingers around your wrist and pushed you away, dislodging your knife and knocking you back a few steps. Like you were weak.

You couldn’t do this, he was starting to slip through the cracks that were forming in you. He was looking at you, seeing you. He always had, from the moment you were nothing but hunter and prey, he knew exactly how to get through your intricately woven net of silver-tongued quips and cocky arrogance. 

No. 

Your voice cracked, echoes of the dark beast’s laughter in your ears “No! Stop pushing me away, stop taking it. Fight me!!” You surged for him again, your hands curling into fists, slamming against the beskar plates again and again. 

You didn’t care that it hurt, that it made pain explode across your knuckles. 

You liked it, you liked the pain. Deserved that and so much more. 

And the Mandalorian… just stood there. He shook his head, just slightly, “No.” He stood there as you hammered your fists against his chest, even when you started to kick him. Just watched as your eyes became glassier, your punches harder but less accurate. 

Why wasn’t he fighting you? 

Your hazy mind began to overwork, searching for something, anything to provoke him, “Why? You don’t want to fight a girl? Too proud are you?” You slammed your knee into his, pulled at the armour plates, honed your pain and fury into him but he just absorbed it. “You’re as weak as I am, you’re running too. You’re the hypocrite, Mandalorian, not me.” Your words were stilted, made no sense as you spat out words as cruel as you could, just needing to provoke him. 

Nothing did. Nothing. There was no noise in the cargo hold but the sounds of the people outside, beeping, the dull thud of your fists, your spiteful words and your own ragged breathing. 

And the whispering in your head that had turned into a full-on symphony of bitter taunts and sniping truths. It rose with memories, flashes of your dead parents, the battered bodies of those that had tried to help you, people who had been caught in the cross-hairs of your life. Innocent people that had turned into nothing more than collateral damage. 

Blood had started to smear on the beskar, your knuckles splitting open with the repeated impact. You could hear Duru meowing, Grogu gurgling in worry but you didn’t care. 

The beast and its army rose, tasting the scent of blood and bringing you visions of the future, of the Mandalorian, dead on the ground. The blood from your fists turned into his own, painting the ground red. Duru, fur soaked in scarlet and Grogu, his tiny little body broken on the floor in a pool. 

And above them, you stood, soaked in the blood of these three. Relishing in the pain and torture that you had caused. You could taste their blood. 

The room began to spin further, the whispering detonated into a roar and it unleashed a heavy roiling cloud within you. It choked you, squeezed fists around your lungs, clouded your eyes and snuck into your head. It whispered to you, such cruel taunts, sucking out the deepest, most vile thoughts you had about yourself and spat them back out, combined with these visions of the future. It leeched the energy out of you and with a choked sob, your knees gave way. 

Duru let out a yowl of concern, springing off of the cargo box. 

I can’t do this anymore. I can’t be confident, or strong. I can’t be brave and cocky, I can’t keep throwing myself into every fight, I can’t run anymore. I can’t do this. I can’t-

And then a pair arms caught you. 

Mando caught you. He didn’t haul you up against him. He didn’t try and pull you up. 

No, he sunk to the floor with you, supporting your weight in his own body, leaning against the wall and letting you collapse against him. 

You froze, your body stiffened as he did. This… people didn’t touch you like this. They didn’t put their arms around you unless they were trying to drag you somewhere. 

You hadn’t been hugged since you were a child, and yet here you were. The Mandalorian was holding you, but loosely. 

Waiting, for your consent. For you to be okay with this. 

And as his gloved hand brushed your back, such a tender warmth broke through you, caressed your pain and you couldn’t resist. You sunk into him, the last saps of energy leaving you as tears flooded your cheeks. The armour was hard, digging into you a little bit, but the feeling of just being held was more than enough. 

He wrapped his arms around you, coaxing you against his chest. His legs were either side of you, one stretched out on the floor and the other resting up to support your back. Distantly, you were aware of four clawed feet padding over your lap, Duru settling into the space between you and Mando’s arm. 

The armour disguised the frantic beating of his heart, your tears and shaking of your body held the trembling of his own hands, but he didn’t mention it. Didn’t mention the fact that this was the first time he had held someone like this that wasn’t the kid… since he was a child himself. He was just as starved of touch as you, even more so because he had no skin-to-skin contact either. He could feel your warmth through the fabric of his clothes that weren’t covered, could feel the weight of you leaning into him. 

He didn’t speak, just held you in the dimness of the cargo hold, keeping you together as you fell apart, kept the promise of death away, just as you had done for him. 

Previous chapter| Next chapter

[tuiyla]

She'd also be last if we're ranking flirting ability 😌

Okay now I need this ranking. It'd be super hard though.

from another Anon:

Please do an actual ranking of this now😭😭

Alright then, challenge accepted! This is all just imo of course and would probably change tomorrow.

Mike He’s just smooth, you know? A bit dorky at times but an effortlessly cool guy who doesn’t even need to flirt, let’s be honest.

Quinn She just has the vibes, she knows how to work people. Sure she has the looks too but as we see at the end of our list that doesn’t automatically mean one can flirt. Quinn wraps guys around her finger and her hitting on Santana was solid. Would she be smooth with someone she actually really likes? I don’t know about that. (Note: not that she doesn’t like Santana but she only wanted sex that evening:)

Kurt Listen, once he gets over his baby gay phase Kurt’s kinda smooth but more importantly confident and really genuine. Like, he won’t even flirt with someone unless he means it. The kind of heart that he puts into is endearing.

Mercedes Similar to Kurt. Once she grows confident in her own sexuality she just commands attention. She’s more likely to flirt for fun than Kurt is but is still earnest in a way guys find charming. Can you blame them?

Artie Despite starting out as an insecure nerd, following his relationship with Brittany he becomes a player and must have moves if he scores Kitty and all those girls at college. He does well for himself but the trick is to not get too cocky.

Brittany Maybe Brittany doesn’t flirt so much as she very straightforwardly tells the person what she wants. She doesn’t run all the socially required laps because they’re arbitrary but she gets results. She’s charming and has the same effortlessly cool energy that Mike does.

Puck Kinda pains me to put him relatively high because there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to give him credit for this. But hey, Puck does have some game.

Rachel It takes her a while and she needs to remember to not be way too intense but Rachel’s a surprisingly good flirt. I’m talking about sexy NY Rachel of course.

Blaine Blaine can be kinda clueless and I think he’s better when he doesn’t actually “mean” it, like when he’s performing with the Warblers and really living that performer persona. But he does alright, even if he fumbles when he really means it.

Tina We’re entering little or no game territory. Tina still has some game, when directed at the right person but she does better as the one being flirted with.

Finn Thinks he has game and that makes his flirting worse. Best when he leans into the goofiness instead of trying to be a stud jock or whatever.

Sam See I kinda wanna put him higher, at least above Finn but no game Sam is so amusing to me. “Which planet are we on?” He’s lucky he’s so cute but his himbo persona doesn’t always work. Flirting for him usually involves impressions and nerdy references and that’s just not what we would traditionally call bad flirting. But he’s mostly second to last because I need a no game Samtana brotp.

Santana Bless. But OP, I hear some of you say, she was such a maneater in the first two seasons. Well, tumblr peeps, I raise you comphet Santana. When she flirts with women- well, she mostly doesn’t. She’s just a nervous mess of underboob sweat and “can’t remember my locker combo” and “salt sh-shakers”. And also lest we forget her flirting with men included an insult to end every sentence. Her way of asking Finn out was telling him he’s “exhausting to look at” and I bet 50% of her convo with Sam in Comeback is mouth jokes and insults about how uncool he is. She’s just lucky she’s hot.

Rankings are fun lol feel free to send more

[janatm]

You took for granted seeds we planted when we were young || CLUSTERFUCK 2.0

tagging: Eva Anderson, Morgan Weston, Santana Lopez, Jake Puckerman, Bree Brown & Noah Puckerman

date & time: October 30, 2024 at night

location: Bree's fancy ass apartment

warnings: mentions of alcohol

summary: And here we go again. Another clusterfuck for Jake's video roll on his phone. Santana, Bree and Jake all worked together to get the Throuple in one place to finally talk their shit out. Except some truths are revealed and now things might be worse than ever. Communication is hard.

word count: 5,808

MORGAN hadn’t known it was Jake’s birthday until mid-afternoon, when a text had come through on his phone, while he was elbow-deep in horse grooming, inviting him over for drinks at Bree’s place. Seven hours later, Morgan stood outside the apartment, clutching a gift-wrapped box. When he’d found out about Jake’s birthday, he felt a small pang of guilt - he probably should’ve known. Jake was dating Bree, and Bree had become like a sister to him; and not to forget about the fact that Jake was actually Puck’s half-brother. Not that that mattered right now, even if Morgan tried his best to make it matter. So, Morgan had scrambled to the nearest bike shop and picked out a pair of leather gloves - good ones, sturdy but soft, the kind that felt broken in the moment they were slipped on. The gloves weren’t anything grand, but they’d pair nicely with the motorcycle Morgan had gifted Jake not too long ago. When the door opened, Morgan smiled softly. “I couldn’t show up empty-handed, could I?” He said, first thing and held up the present.

JAKE was still wrapping his mind around practically cutting his mom off for the time being, but with his birthday finally here, he could finally put all of that behind him. Him and Bree still needed to deal with their own mess but for the sake of his brother's current situation, he'd happily agreed to his girl's plan to get the throuple together, and then Santana had jumped on board as well. Getting Puck to Bree's place for what he thought was a chill dinner was simple, and the same had happened with Morgan. He let Bree handle getting Eva there, and once the show was set to start, Santana had made up a reason to get Puck out of the living room area once someone knocked on the door. Once the coast was clear, Jake walked over and opened up the door, and he was surprised to see him with a gift. "Dude, you already gave me your bike, that was present enough." He smiled as he stepped aside after taking the gift bag from the man. "Come on in. Dinner is just about to start, but that's Bree's forte." He pointed out before glancing around behind him to look for his girlfriend. "Bree?"

BREE was fully aware this was probably a terrible idea. However, Eva was her favorite woman, pretty much ever, Morgan was a friend and Puck was basically her brother-in-law. An it did not sit right with her that these two men weren't being as forthcoming with Eva as they needed to be, as she deserved and apparently it was worth pissing her Professor, PR team manager, and friend(?) off to give them an opportunity to say what needed to be said. As she made sure the catered meal was warm and ready to eat, she heard her name being called. Coming into view of Jake and Morgan, she smiled at her boyfriend, while scanning the area, glad to see it looked like Santana had moved her and Puck somewhere else. "Yes, hi, come in." She smiled, and all but pushed Morgan to the kitchen.

PUCK unwillingly followed Santana into another room. Looked like a spare bedroom and he was realizing that Bree was like, rich rich. Which he knew, but he'd never really seen. Not like he would recognize luxury brand clothing or whatever. Looking a the mother of his child he furrowed his eyebrows. "Now why exactly did you want me alone in a bedroom? You know we don't have to have sex if you wanna have another one of my kids." He smiled at his own joke.

SANTANA rolled her eyes at Puck's words. "First of all, don't insult me. I threatened, and then bribed, the hospital so as soon as I pushed Maya out, my tubes were tied. That was the first and only baby that will ever come outta this body." She pointed out. "But I wanted you alone to remind you that I care about you, and I owe you the world for everything you've done for Maya, so just keep that in mind when you find out what your brother, your future sister in law, and I set up." That should have been enough of a hint as to what was coming, but it was also Puck so she wasn't sure if he'd catch onto that.

JAKE had to bite back a chuckle as Morgan was pushed into the kitchen by Bree, but then he followed anyways. "We should probalby start eating, and get out some drinks — the good stuff — right now." He suggested, since he wasn't sure if Puck would end up hearing Morgan's voice and come out of the bedroom yet.

MORGAN shrugged and gave a small smile. "That bike was given to you as a 'thank you' for that time on campus," he started, but continuing almost made him wince at the memory and the pain it had left behind. He stepped into the room, and let the topic go, instead greeting Bree with a warm smile and a small wave. He hadn't seen her since the morning after their drunken night that he didn't remember a thing of, and in a weird way, it felt kind of comforting to be her and Jake's third wheel in this situation. "D'ya need a hand or anythin'?" He asked, slightly confused about being pushed into the kitchen, but figured it was because he probably had to help out. "The good stuff? What good stuff, man? Y'know, I'm drivin' tonight, so I can't go as crazy as Bree and I did a few days ago."

JAKE decided not to comment on the reason why he'd gotten the bike, since he was sure that the classroom fiasco contributed to why the throuple was in the position they were in now, and instead just focused on the fact that he wanted to get some food before the show started. "Don't worry, we've got it." He suggested, and they did mostly, since Santana had practically laid out the fine china dinnerware, the utensils, the cups, etc. The Latina had been rather dedicated to helping Bree get everything laid out just in case this shit went downhill fast. Jake was piling food onto a plate for himself when he heard a knock at the door, and knowing it could only be one person, he put the plate down in front of Morgan. "Babe, pour the wine." He called out as he jogged over and opened up the door for Eva.

EVA had been expecting this to just be a chill night in with Bree, so she was dressed down and completely unprepared when it was little Puckerman opening the door instead. "Why are you here?" She asked before just walking past Jake, and the aroma of food coming from the kitchen led her straight in that direction until she spotted Morgan. "Bree Bianca Brown, what the fuck is this?" She huffed, already annoyed at this little ambush.

BREE really wasn't listening to anything anyone was saying. Instead, she was attuned to that front door and waiting for that fateful knock. Sooner than she was ready there it was. Popping open a bottle of good winne she poured herself a glass and chugged it. Hearing her full government named, she looked at Morgan, "If you'll excuse me." Then she went to the front door. met with a very unamused Eva. "Before you get mad, just remember I'm on your side."

PUCK wasn't surprised Santana managed to get her tubes tied so early in life. A bad ass through and through and he was glad that their daughter seemed to inheriet so much from her. Even if it did cause some challenges from time to time."Yeah, okay, not sure what that's got to do with Jake's birthday dinner. I mean, I already knew y'all set that up." Before he ould even have another thought, he heard a voice ring out through this big ass apartment and he'd know that voice anywhere. Without even looking back at Santana he just left the room and followed where the voice came from until he was face to face with Eva. Looking at his brother, he was starting to put the pieces together. "The fuck is going on?"

MORGAN watched as Jake started scooping food onto the plate, and he was about to speak up when there was a knock on the door. Morgan was pretty sure he'd been the only one invited tonight, for whatever reason, but maybe a family member was coming over? Or a close friend? Either way, Morgan quietly grabbed the plate as Jake exited the room, and just continued to scoop the food up, figuring that Jake wouldn't mind. It wasn't until he heard that familiar voice that he looked up, seeing Eva on the opposite of the kitchen island. "I-" he wasn't allowed to finish his sentence when the door opened again and Puck was stood right there, next to Eva. "This- I'm-...I was invited!" He quickly tried to reason, wanting them to know he hadn't planned for this. Sure, he was trying to win them back, but this wasn't on his list of ways.

EVA could only roll her eyes as Puck walked out next, and then she didn't even need Morgan to defend himself because she could already tell that Bree and Jake had set this up. Or at least she had assumed it was just them until she spotted Santana walking down the hall next, and now it really made sense. "Just so we're all clear, the last little ambush didn't go so well, so why are we doing this again?"

SANTANA didn't really get the confusion on the throuple's faces, or their lack of appreciation for the hard work that had gone into tricking all three of them like this, but she wasn't gonna stand for it either. "It's too late to yell this out, but surprise! Yes, all three of you were unaware that this was happening and yes, the three of us did set this up because we care about all of you. If any of you wanna fight about it, I'm down, but I'd advise you not to." She sassed with a grin. "Now, sit your asses down and talk." Was she demanding it? Yes. The only one who might fight her back on it was Eva, that much she knew, so she didn't even say anything else as she walked over and grabbed her hand, shoving her over on the couch. "Jake, you're guarding the door. Bree, get the wine. Puck and Morgan, both of you fucked up, again, so it's only fair that one of you start."

JAKE didn't know why Santana was always bossing everyone around, but he wasn't stupid enough to disobey a direct order from her either so he grabbed a chair from the dining room and placed it in front of the door. "Since it is my birthday, can someone get me a plate before the show starts?" He teased, sitting down in the chair and taking his phone out to record this, since he knew it would come in handy later.

BREE was glad that Santana was there, because even Bree can admit, Eva would have walked out, maybe Puck and Morgan too and all of this would have been for nothing. So she did as she was told and went to get the wine. Very good wine, that she knew for a fact was Eva's favorite. So she looked at Jake before she went to go get wine glasses and fill up two decanters.

PUCK kind of wanted to just leave, but it was his brother's birthday and Santana wasn't to be fucked with. So he sat down, not next to Eva and watched as Bree came in with the glasses and wine and he found himself struggling to look at Morgan right now. All of this didn't even feel real and he needed a minute for his brain to boot back up. "Can I get water or something?" He asked Bree, he was trying not to drink anymore. It was one of the many things he was obtaining from for the time being.

MORGAN was as confused as he always was - except maybe just slightly more than usual. The last time this had happened, it had not gone down well, and Morgan knew better than to try and talk to Puck and Eva, while there were other people there. But Santana was intimidating and he didn't know what she'd do if he just jumped out of the kitchen window, so he just slowly followed the group into the living room with the plate of food in hand. He decided to place his tall body in the doorway between the living room and dining room, so he could watch everything unfold from there. Puck refusing alcohol was an incredibly welcomed sight, and it warmed his heart, his eyes softening as he stared a little bit too long at him. But then he snapped out of it and he figured it'd be best to maybe speak up, since he was the one who'd last done everyone wrong anyway. "So- err...you both look good." He said, eyes darting between Eva and Puck.

SANTANA wasn't gonna let Bree serve everybody herself, since she probably was the most foreign to such out of the women in the room, so she got up and grabbed a plate of food for Jake. It was the least they could do since they had jacked whatever birthday plans he could have had with Bree. And busying herself was the only way to keep her from not slapping both Morgan and Puck in the back of their heads for being idiots, so she didn't even mind it this one time. But as soon as Morgan finally opened up his mouth to greet them, that urge increased. "Well, that's not how I'd greet people I claim to love after I royally fuck some shit up, but sure, Weston. Nice opening." She stated sarcastically, handing Jake his plate and a glass of wine before she went back for her own.

EVA could have left now, and she wasn't afraid of Santana so she'd fight her way out of here if she had to, but this was the first time she'd seen Puck since finding out what he'd done in lockdown. While dumbass #1 had tried to love bomb her since she'd last seen him, dumbass #2 hadn't so much as said a single word to her since she'd cried in his arms, and that horrifying moment alone called for some ounce of accountability on his part. "I always look good." She tossed at Morgan without even looking his way as her eyes were trained on Puck...for now. "Since we're clearly not getting out of this, let's skip the bullshit. Noah, what did you do during lockdown? Better yet, who did you do, and before you think about lying, he already ratted you out so your best bet is to just be honest."

PUCK could feel Eva's eyes on him and he was rebooted enough to know that he better look back. Probably the least he could do since he hadn't reached out to her since she cried on his shoulder. Which he now understands was also a dick move. And selfish and definitely not the actions of a man who loves her, so when she started asking about lockdown, it wasn't until she mentioned him telling her that he even realized she already knew. Fucking, Morgan. Couldn't even give Puck the ability to tell Eva himself. He decided to talk to Eva first and then deal with Morgan after. Look at that, him thinking, what an improvement. Thankfully, Bree came back with a water and he thanked her before chugging half the bottle. "On day four of the lockdown I got shit faced, had sex with some chick, kept drinking, then punched a wall. That's how I hurt my hand. I should have told you myself. Even if I didn't tell you that day we talked. I should have reached out and I should have told you the truth, instead of making excuses to justify not talking to you yet. I'm sorry for what I did during lockdown. I'm sorry for not telling you about it myself. I'm sorry for not reaching out and for ghosting you again." Now, Puck wanted to immediately throw Morgan under the bus but he wanted to Give him the opportunity he robbed Puck of to tell Eva himself and he wanted to get Eva the space to process what he said and say whatever she needed to say in return. He wasn't perfect and he knew he had a lot to answer for but he was trying.

MORGAN watched Santana, eyes squinting a little at her comment and he was about to speak up when Eva decided to go straight for Puck's throat, calling out his lack of communication. Morgan didn't even know about that part. To a certain degree, he was happy he'd told Eva, even if it wasn't his place to do so. He didn't know if Puck had planned on talking to her about it or not, but there was constantly that nagging in the back of his head, bringin him back into the classroom to be taught about Communications 101, and surely, telling Eva these things was a part of the curriculum, right? On the other hand, he could see how wrong it was too. This was Puck's story to tell, and so once the other man stopped, Morgan gave Jake his plate, leaving the man with two plates full of food now, and he stepped forward. "I'm sorry, too. Everything that I said those days; things came out so wrong. But I thought y'all deserved that kind of communication from me, y'know?"

EVA wasn't surprised that Puck had the sense to just come clean now, and she appreciated his little apology but it was too late for that too. She'd already told him once before about the ghosting, which he had a habit of doing whenever he'd fucked something up, and that should have been the first red flag that caused her to be done with this. Yet she'd ignored that one, and some others, so here they were. She didn't even need to process it since Morgan had given her the rundown of the important shit anyways, so she was about to brush off the apology until Morgan stepped towards them and uttered one of his own. That earned him an eye roll. "I'm pretty sure nothing came out wrong, Morgan." Everything he said had been crystal clear, in her opinion, so she didn't know why he was inserting himself into this right now. Turning her attention back to Puck, she shrugged. "I get how shitty your dad was, and how everything he's said and done has probably fucked you up, but that can't constantly be your excuse for why you make shitty decisions. Morgan and I both agreed on that when he told me what you did, and honestly, fuck you for letting me cry and be vulnerable and not having the balls to just be honest. That's a dick move." She huffed.

PUCK simply nodded at her words. Even though they stung, he had also been prepared to have his apology not accepted or have it be too little too late. While he was working on a larger apology to give her, his therapist and support group members had all made it clear that sometimes things are too far gone, but that doesn't mean you don't apologize. Because the apology isn't to fix it or get what you want. You apologize because you did something wrong, period. "Yes it is. I recently learned that even if you can explain it that will never excuse shitty behavior." Now that he'd said that, he could focus on Morgan and his lack of confession. Maybe he'd already told Eva, but something told him he hadn't. I mean would he have bothered telling Puck if he hadn't said he talked to Serena? Probably not. "I am wondering what kind of explanation he gave you" He looked at Eva. "-for why he fucked Serena probably fifteen minutes after whatever conversation he had with you about me." Puck still wasn't willing to look at Morgan, and he was being messy and he shouldn't have said it, because Morgan should have told her but fuck him. All the shit he gave Puck for his shitty coping mechanisms, to turn around and reveal his whole fucking secret relationship with Serena, still made his blood boil.

BREE gasped in her seat next to Jake. "Morgan." She said with heavy disappointment in her voice. She hadn't seen that one coming.

EVA didn't know how he'd come to this conclusion, but she was sure that either his mom or someone with some sort of qualifications had gotten him there. He sure as hell hadn't figured that out on his own, and she would have been proud of him for it if she wasn't mad at him. But when he started to turn the focus on Morgan and mentioned an explanation from him, she was slightly confused since Morgan had told her he didn't know what his feelings for that little punk were. And she was still pissed at him too, but when Puck revealed the new information, she was almost positive that her blood had never boiled like it was now. She also hadn't known that the man could hurt her any worse than he already had, but boy was she fucking wrong. "You fucking asshole." She hissed as she finally turned to Morgan. "You looked me right in my face and gave me that whole speech about your stupid heart tying into knots when you're with us, how losing us — or me or him or whatever — would be the biggest mistake of your life, and how I was the fucking one just to go fuck her immediately after that?" Eva hissed as she glared at him, and she didn't even know how she was fighting back tears right now but she sure as hell wasn't about to let him see her cry ever again.

SANTANA was thankful that she had refilled her glass because all of these revelations were too much, even for her, and she hated that things were this bad. Gulping down the full contents of her glass, she was now annoyed because Eva was clearly too good for them. But it also took a bitch to know a bitch, and she could see right through Eva's tough exterior and knew she was on the verge of tears. As if there were ever a time to step in, it was now. "Jake, turn the camera off." She stated before she glanced between the two idiots. "If there were ever a time for you two to be actual men for once, it's now. She should walk out of here and never look back, so you might wanna say whatever you need to say before she does."

JAKE nodded and quickly turned the camera off, and even he was baffled at this now. And as much as he loved his brother, he couldn't exactly support him and Morgan repeatedly hurting someone who obviously didn't deserve it. "Just so we're clear, this is the last time I'll be involved in setting you three up. I thought I was bad but damn, you two don't even deserve her."

MORGAN looked between Eva and Puck, feeling his brows furrow as he listened to Eva come for Puck and his actions. Was it true? Yes. Did she have to tell him that harshly? Morgan's heart hurt, wanting to step in and cradle Puck's face into his chest, but he also wanted to kiss Eva's lips so hard, because the way she was taking control turned him on like crazy. Gulping, Morgan was about to step in, choosing to defend Puck, but then he was interrupted before he could even say a word, and the other man decided to completely throw him under the bus. Everything that he hadn't yet told Eva, because he was playing the balancing game of making her miss him, before confessing about his wrong-doing. His eyes looking between the two started panicking, and his ears started ringing, and Bree's disappointed 'Morgan' was fuzzy in his brain. But then Eva spoke up, and it was like his ears snapped back, her voice crystal clear and he gulped hard. It was like he had this little voice inside his head, constantly doubting whatever he was going to say next. "I can explain!" 'Can you?' "It's all a big misunderstanding!" 'Is it?' "I didn't mean any of it!" 'Didn't you?' "Can you guys just shut up for a second?!" He finally snapped, his voice loud, and it was mostly directed to the voices in his head, but he turned to Santana and Jake. Looking back at Puck and Eva, he took a step forward and ran a hand through his beard. "Listen. I had sex with Serena, after our lunch, Eva," he started, trying to calmly explain what had happened. "I didn't do it to hurt you, you have to believe that! I had invited her over, so that we could get things cleared up and so I could move on, and focus on the two of you. I don't know what happened, it's like everything became blurry after that, because I wasn't thinking. About anything. And I should've." He sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "I can't take it back now, but my mind's never been clearer. I meant what I said. I only want you two."

EVA honestly didn't need to hear shit else at this point, since Morgan crossing that line after their last conversation only solidified everything she'd said before. In fact, her mind her never been more made up than it was now. But when he raised his voice at them, both her and Santana made the exact same face, and she could tell the Latina was about to knock him upside his fucking head, just as she wanted to, but she waved her off dismissively. The last thing he needed was both of them about to throw hands, and she was sure that the odds had never been more in their favor. Just like the last time she'd seen him, there was more bullshit excuses coming her way, and she didn't hesitate to roll her eyes as he spoke. The audacity of him to come for Puck's excuse when he kept finding them for his actions too. Waiting until he was finished, she shook her head. "Right, so instead of doing like I told you to do and telling her what you told me, you fucked her? It didn't just happen because you weren't thinking, Morgan. You did it because you wanted to." That realization alone was enough to make her crack, but somehow, by some miracle, she held back her tears. For now. "Just like I said before, you both keep saying how you want this, how you're so sure of it now, but you both had to fuck someone else to be sure. I didn't. And honestly, all this proved was that even if we tried to do this, the second shit goes south or we have one fight, both of you are just gonna go stick your dicks in whatever hole gives you some attention. I deserve a lot better than that." Eva didn't really know what else she was even supposed to say now without repeating herself, so she stood back up and glanced between them. "I can't do this anymore, so I'm done. For good this time. You two can do whatever the fuck you want, but leave me out of it. I let both of you hurt me twice now, and I'll be damned if you do it ever again, so just stay away from me. Is that clear?"

MORGAN watched as Eva told him everything; everything that he'd done to fuck this up. She was coming for him, calling him out, and honestly, it was the truth. Morgan might've been dumb, but he could see exactly what she was saying, and it made sense to him. He had had sex with Serena because he'd wanted to, he had gone and stuck his dick in someone else, after a fight with Eva. And if anything, this just proved to him more that he needed to become a better man. That he needed to prove himself more. That this wasn't the end. If anything, it only made his desire for them stronger. "Eva..." he watched her stand up, wanting to say something, but not knowing what exactly. He needed his usual 3-4 business days to figure out what exactly he could do or say, in order to make any of this better.

PUCK could see the turmoil in Morgan, the realization that he was wrong, had been wrong but the fight to tell yourself you didn't mean it, that it wasn't you intention. That you weren't that guy because in your head you'd never treat someone you care about the way you're realizing you did. And Puck knew that's what was happening in his head because it's exactly what happened in his for weeks. listened while Eva spoke. Said everything Puck and Morgan deserved to hear. As everyone's voices filled his head, he felt a rage build up in him at Morgan, at himself too, but at Morgan more, but he was trying to decide if he had the right to say anything. Thankfully, Eva had plenty to say, to them both. All of it hurt but all of it true and when she said she couldn't do it anyone, he realized he had already accepted this outcome. Accepted that unless there was real change, provable change, in Morgan and Puck's coping mechanisms and behaviors, unless Eva had the time and the space to process and heal and rebuild herself, this was always going to end up here. For the first time, he finally understood why his mother told him as a child not to hold on so tight you squeeze the life out of what you're trying to hang on to. Nothing can grow in those conditions. While he had so much he needed to say to Eva he knew he couldn't say it now and even if he could she likely wouldn't hear it. So he simply turned to her and let his heart break as he looked at her, knowing the pain he caused. "I get it, and you're right, about all of it and imma stay away from you. I'll do everything I can to keep us from crossing paths again, not on campus, not anywhere." It hurt to say but it was the least he could do. Now, he needed to say something to Morgan and he wasn't all the way sure how. Getting up, he faced his- not his, cowboy, "She was my friend and you knew that. You could've picked anyone, but you picked my friend. Losing you and Eva is what I deserve, it's what I earned but Serena? I didn't earn that loss. And neither one of you cared enough about me to- to..." He trailed off, just staring at Morgan. Finally he looked away an at Santana, Bree and Jake. "Can I go?" He asked the three who set this up.

EVA honestly just needed to get out of here, get some air, and to move the fuck on from both of them. Morgan having nothing to say other than her name proved that he had nothing left to say right now, which made sense considering that he'd probably just run right back to Serena after this. And the Puck started talking and she didn't care what he had to say either. "Great, good to know you can commit to something." She muttered before she headed for the door, and Jake quickly jumped up and moved out of the way so she could leave.

SANTANA sighed as Eva left, and while the plan had gone off the rails, she had switched sides and was only rooting for Eva now. Well, she was rooting for Puck to get better and work through his shit, but romantically, she only cared about the woman in this throuple. Downing some more wine, she nodded at Puck's question. "Yeah, it's fine. I think you've said everything you needed to get off of your chest too, so no need to stay any longer." Not that he needed permission at this point anyways, but he had asked so she gave it to him.

JAKE wasn't for beating a dead horse so with Eva and now Puck being done, he was giving up on this throuple thing too. "Well, thank you both for coming anyways. And thank you for my birthday gifts. Sorry this didn't work out like we planned, but...good luck in whatever, or whoever, you do next, I guess?" He rambled, since he wasn't really sure what else to say. "I'll see you around, Morgan."

MORGAN's face resembled that of a kicked puppy, not knowing how to make any of this better. The way he'd not only ruined his relationship with Eva and Puck now, but he'd also come between Puck and Serena, knowing how the two were such good friends; at least that's what he figured based off of the fact that he'd caught him in her apartment that one time. But a part of him was screaming that this could be resolved. If he was stubborn enough; persistent enough. He loved them for crying out loud! He wasn't going to give up on them just yet. As he watched Eva leave, followed by Puck, Morgan sighed, and rubbed his temple in pure frustration. He had to think now, come up with something else, because he was pretty sure he'd cleaned out every single poppy and sunflower field in California in order to send them that crazy amount of flowers, so that wasn't an option until they'd grown back again. He had to think about his next move. What was the way to someone's heart? ... Eyes opening wide, Morgan looked at the three on-lookers and gave them an optimistic smile. "This was great, you guys, we should really do it again some other time, but I need to go, I have something- I have several things I gotta take care of." And with that, he ran out of the house, knowing exactly where to head next: his kitchen.

[broadstbroskis]

our love lasts so long | william nylander

a/n: oh hello!! am i here with yet another childhood friends to lovers fic?? why yes, yes i am. one (mildly) based on a taylor swift song, as the title would suggest (seven, a underrated folklore BOP)? yes again. the biggest of shoutouts to anyone who let me talk about this over the past few days but especially to @brockadoodles who listened to many many things and to @danglesnipecelly for reminding me about my childhood friends to lovers brand

word count: 7k

-----

The girls are being mean to her.

They’re older than her, a lot older than her, like already in grade school, and they all have friends here already, because they’ve all been here for a while. Noah frowns. It’s not her fault her daddy just got sent here. Florida’s too hot anyway; she still doesn’t understand how this ice rink even stays cold!

She shuffles her feet along. The Christmas songs are loud and there are a lot of people here but Daddy promised he’d take her around really fast after he finished working on shooting the puck with Jake. She just has to be super patient-she thinks that’s the thing Mommy always tells her to be-while she waits and then Daddy will play with her and those stupid girls won’t even matter.

(And yes she can use that word; she just can’t tell Mommy.)

The ice feels funny, not like she’s used to back at home in Canada, but before Noah can start to look for her Mommy to ask her, someone crashes into her and they both end up on the ice.

The boy who flew into her isn’t crying so Noah sucks her lip between her teeth and fights back her tears. “Hey!” He whines over to someone and then says something she can’t understand.

“Hey!” She whines and shoves him. “You’re s’pposed to say sorry when when you hit somebody!”

“I know!” His eyes widen. The blue is a pretty blue; it’s like the ice and Noah likes it. “My sister pushed me first though.”

“Oh.” Noah says. Jake is always pushing her around and he never gets in trouble for it. It’s not fair.  “Well she should say sorry to you then.”

The boy nods in agreement, his blond hair flopping everywhere. “Yeah but she’s older so she thinks she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to.”

Noah scowls. “So does Jake.”

The boy’s face lights up. “Well then we should be friends and we could fight them together!”

Someone else who’s going to help stop Jake from shooting pucks at her? Deal. “Okay.” Noah grins. “I’m Noah.”

He smiles back. “William.” 

-----

Willy’s at practice when he hears about the trade, the one that’s bringing Barrett Evans to the Blackhawks, and he hears it mostly because the boys think it means Jake Evans is going to join their team.

Willy’s playing a couple years up here, and there’s an argument going on during practice about if Jake’s doing the same; if he’ll join their team, how soon he’ll be able to get there if he is. That they’re more excited about the potential of Jake Evans joining this team than any discussion of his dad joining the actual Blackhawks is one of the reasons Willy likes this team so much. They’re all chill; no one cares what his dad does or where he plays. 

He’s just another one of the boys.

In about a week they find out Jake is joining their team, his mom quickly setting up a carpool to the rink with Willy’s, who is more than eager to agree, with the new baby taking up (in Willy’s opinion) too much space and time.

(What’d they need another sister for? Wasn’t two enough?)

Jake comes with two sisters of his own, another baby just like Willy’s sister, and then, even better, a dark haired girl that Willy only remembers from pictures and dreams, but a face that he recognizes instantly.

“Hey.” He taps the glass in front of where she’s sitting at his practice, writing something- probably homework. He’s supposed to do his in the car on the way to practice, Mum says so, but he never does, because he hates doing it, and like really, what’s the point if he’s going to be a famous NHL player anyway? 

Noah looks up, a little annoyed, but then her face breaks out into a smile when she sees it’s him. “William!”

“Willy.” He corrects.

She pulls a face. “Ew, like a wet willy?”

“No,” He laughs. “Like my name!”

“That’s dumb.”

“No it’s not!” It’s what everyone calls him.

Noah’s still frowning at him. “Yes it is, Will.”

“No dumber than the ark you’re named after.” He counters. If she’s going to be like that, he can play too. 

“At least I get cool animals on mine.” Noah huffs and then turns away from him, like she’s mad. 

“No hockey on it though.” Willy says and she turns back to him just to roll her eyes at him. “Not really worth it then, yeah?”

“You’re the worst.” Noah says, but she’s back to facing him and smiling again, showing off a couple missing teeth. “Don’t you do anything else?” He shakes his head, grinning. “That’s gonna change because I’m not playing hockey with you all the time.”

“Well I’m not playing dolls with you all the time.” Will says quickly. He has to do that enough with his sisters; he’s not doing anymore of it.

She rolls her eyes. “Stupid boys.” She mutters and goes back to her work.

“What does that mean?” Willy demands but before he can get an answer, his coach is calling them all back to practice and his break is done. He’s just going to have to bug her at the game tonight. 

(He does bug her at the game that night, but she annoys him right back, and by the second period, they’re laughing and grinning, friends once again).

-----

“Ok, but did you lose Alex or just like, misplace him?” Noah looks around her, searching for a head of blond hair in the crowd of people rushing around them in the mall.

“What’s the difference?” Will hisses, using her shoulder to stand on his toes, head turning as he searches for his brother.

“Like, are you actually asking because of a two language thing or are you just being a jerk because we lost your brother?”

Will glares over at him and drops down flat on his feet again, swearing as he does. “Mum’s doing to kill me.”

“Why?” Alex asks, reappearing suddenly with a soft pretzel in hand, and Noah screams, throwing her arms around him. “What happened?”

“We hate you.” Will says and Noah nods in agreement. “That’s what.”

“What’d I do?” Alex protests.

“Disappeared!” Noah cries. “With no warning.

“I told Will I was going to get a pretzel.” He defends. “He can’t listen and that’s my fault?”

Will reaches out like he’s going to pull his brother into a headlock-or worse, Noah’s not going to risk the two of them going at it like they do in their basement here in public-so she reaches out and grabs his hand, intercepting him before he can even make it to just ruffle his hair, or something. “Come on, Alex.” She teases, even as Will drops his jaw at her for stopping him. “We both know Will hears what he wants to hear.”

Alex laughs, looking as pleased as she knew he would, but Will’s jaw remains dropped. “Screw you” Will says, and because she’s still holding his one hand to keep it from going for his brother, she’s defenseless against the finger he pokes into her most ticklish spot.

“Stop!” She squirms away, or tries to- he won’t let go of her hand. “Will! Let go!”

He stops poking her side, but squeezes her hand and grins. “Nope, you chose this; now you’re stuck with me.”

“Your hand is sticky!” She whines. 

“I was testing tape.” Will grins, swinging their hands widely. “Now yours can be sticky too.”

Noah looks down at their hands, joined and still swinging wherever Will moves them. She hopes that’s all that’s on them but you never know with the DC Metro.

-----

There’s a girl giggling behind him.

Willy turns and she stops, but as soon as he turns back, she’s giggling again and this time, so is her friend.

He tugs at the blazer of his uniform, looking down at his shirt. Is his tie done funny? He’d gotten called out for that last week. But it looks fine, just like everyone else’s did earlier. He pulls out his phone. Hurry up. He sends Noah, watching the dots appear on his screen, like she’s texting back, but then she appears, right in front of him. “Finally.” He grabs her and tugs her away from this school, those girls, even more of them giggling at him.

Willy wipes at his face. Maybe there’s something on it? But nothing comes off on his hand and he frowns harder.

Noah’s biting her lip, like she’s trying not to laugh, and it only works for so long. “She has a crush on you, dummy.”

“Oh.” Willy says blankly, trying to sneak a look back at the first girl. 

“Oh,” Noah parrots. “Honest to god, Will, it’s a good thing you’re pretty.”

“Hey!” He forgets all about the girl, in favor of knocking his shoulders against hers-not hard enough to send her falling into the dirty snow of this New York suburb, but hard enough to make her laugh. “I’m athletic too!”

Noah bursts into laughter, this loud thing that’s bright and contagious and only serves to make Willy join in with her- not that he’s trying hard to stop himself. He’s always laughing when she is. “Sure bud,” She pats his arm. “You tell yourself that.”

-----

“Iced tea.” Noah hands a cup over to Will and then slides down so she’s sitting next to him, dangling her feet in the pool. It’s really too cold to go in, but that hasn’t stopped Will, who’s been swimming all afternoon on and off- and it hasn’t stopped him from pulling her in with him.

“How much sugar?” Will asks demandingly, as she rolls her eyes, like he’s not already taking a sip.

She’d normally answer with a snarky comment, just because he deserves it. But the nostalgia’s setting in; it’s been hitting her at random moments all week, and she’s inclined to just be nice to him, leaning against him as she says, “Come on, like I don’t know how you like your iced tea by now.”

Will sighs dramatically, taking her weight and pressing back against her. “Guess I’m going to have to make my own coffee now too, huh?”

“Two creams, one sugar.” Noah reminds him gently and he laughs, but it sounds kind of hollow, not at all like the honk that usually sends her into fits of giggles right along with him. It’s quiet after he stops, the only sound the pool filter a few feet away and the crickets just starting to chirp, and she hates the silence. In all their years of friendship, they’ve never been quiet people, never had to do an awkward dance while they figured out who they were each time they met. They fell right back into easy friendship, laughing and giggling, dragging each other into their favorite things and places, until one of them was leaving.

It feels different this time. “Are you really leaving?” There’d never been a doubt in her mind when her dad left DC that she’d see Will again. Maybe not for a few months, maybe not for a few years, but the day would come.

“For now.” Will shrugs. “I’m sure we’ll be back.”

“It’s Sweden.” Noah says quietly. She doesn’t have that same feeling this time. Sweden’s their home. Why would they leave? 

“It’s hockey.” Will says, like hockey, Sweden, and home- they’re all interchangeable. 

And maybe they are; hockey- the people Noah meets because of her dad’s team, the friends she’s made, Will, his family- hockey, as a concept, has been more of a home to her than any of the houses she’s known, than these temporary places she embraces every two years or so. 

But she’s been around long enough to know what comes after hockey and it’s the only thing that changes home. The offseason home becomes the main home. Dads start picking up carpool duties and volunteer coaching positions. The spotlight shifts to the kids and their dreams. 

It’s hockey and it’s Sweden and it’s home and whether they’re all different or the same, Noah knows this is the last time she’ll be seeing Will.

-----

Willy has minimal complaints about being a rookie, even if Reemer and Naz think he should have more. 

He’s, like, the definition of living the dream. He’s got a sweet apartment that he shares with one of his best friends. He’s on a dream line with two more of his best friends and they’re absolutely tearing it up. 

His team’s incredible, even if they’re a bunch of assholes sometimes (Willy is too sometimes, he admits), but they’re fun and they’re funny and they like to let loose and have a good time, for as often as they’re really fucking serious about the goal they’re all there for. 

Like today. Practice had been brutal and then there’d been a lift before a video session, but there’s nothing on the schedule for tomorrow so there hadn’t even been a question of if they were going out that night. Suggestions for where had been tossed out the second practice ended.

It’s a good night, things are going well and drinks are flowing (as they should be) and then Matts rolls back to the table, weirdly dejected after coming back from the bar trying to talk up a pretty girl, and he takes his chirps with as much grace as the worst loser Willy’s ever met can, but Willy looks over and he knows that girl. He’d recognize those eyes anywhere, even if her hair is longer and maybe darker? So he gets up, even as Matts calls after him, “Fuck you Willy,” and the rest of the boys laugh.

He leans his weight against Noah, laughing at the look on her face when she realizes it’s him. The annoyance leaves her face pretty quickly and a smile slides right in its place, like she’s waiting for him. “Matts is pretty annoyed you turned him down.” He teases, bypassing hello altogether.

“Yeah well,” She huffs and it’s like she’s trying for annoyed but Willy can see the smile that she’s hiding. “Matts needs to learn that just because he’s a big shot hockey player doesn’t mean every girl is going to drop into bed with him at the sound of his name and a free drink.”

“He’s a lot nicer than that.” Willy defends. “Usually. I didn’t mean it like that.” Because, well, Matts can be an asshole, but it’s not about bringing a girl home.

Noah looks at him skeptically. “I’ll take your word for it.”

“Yeah, I’ve never led you astray before .”

She bursts into laughter. “Yeah, okay.” The sarcasm drips from her tone, even through the laughter.

Willy pokes her but it only makes her laugh harder. “Name one time.”

“Sledding in DC, winter skate in New York, ditching school to go to the mall that one time in Westchester, taking the train into-“

He covers her mouth. “I said name one.”

When he removes his hand, Noah’s grinning up at him, and suddenly he realizes what’s different. It’s not her hair (which is darker, he’s sure now that he’s up close), or her smile (still bright and laughing), or her eyes (bright and green and unforgettable). It’s the oh fuck running through his brain, because he’d definitely take her home.

-----

Falling back into friendship with Will is easy; it’s pretending Noah doesn’t want more that’s hard.

It’s always been easy to be friends with Will. She can’t remember a time when they didn’t click, when things felt weird or uncomfortable between them. 

But that was before he started dragging her everywhere around Toronto- to the greatest restaurants she’s ever eaten at, to the Christmas Market, to breakfast on Thursday’s every week he’s in town because he knows that she doesn’t have class until the afternoon. 

The flutter in her stomach is so unfamiliar, something so unassociated with Will, that it takes her a while to place it. And of course he’s doing something so normal, so innocuous, so casual, it shouldn’t even register on her radar. He’s buying coffee, for Christ’s sake!

But he’s remembering that she likes oat milk in her iced coffee, even though she hasn’t really actually told him that; it’s just the order she always gives when they go for breakfast. And he’s ordered her a size up from what she usually gets, without her even asking, just because she’d mentioned being up late last night with homework.

“Here!” Will chirps happily, passing her the cup grinning, and there’s that flutter again, deep in her stomach, and it’s that, that small gesture that means so much, just knowing that he’s looking at her enough to know that she needs this extra large iced coffee with oat milk without even being told, that tells her what this feeling is.

This is a crush.

“Thanks.” She’s gonna tamp this baby down and fast. Why is she even crushing on Will at all? It must be, like, the years they’ve spent apart; she’s been desensitized to him or something. Suddenly, his hair’s all beautiful and his eyes are pretty and shit. Unreal.

“You’re welcome,” Will smiles. “But I didn’t just get this for you just because you look exhausted.”

“Is this a bribe?” She demands.

Will laughs. “Kind of.” She side-eyes him until he caves. “We’re all going out this weekend after the game and the team wants to meet you.”

“Oh.” She says, surprised. “That’s it?”

“You were expecting worse?”

She nods. “Much.”

“Well, nope.” He pops the ‘p.’ “Just gotta come hang out with me.”

“Ugh.” She complains. “Maybe that is worse.”

“I bought you that coffee. I’ll take it right back.” Will threatens.

“Never.” Noah cradles it close to her chest. “Not allowed.”

Will’s watching her, smiling, like he already knows she’s going to say yes, but he says anyway. “So you’ll come?”

“Of course, I’ll come.” It really wasn’t even a question. She would have come even if he hadn’t bribed her with the most amazing coffee she’s ever had to drink, but he sweetened the deal with that, so that’s how she finds herself slipping into the VIP section of a club on a Saturday night, eyes scanning to find him.

It’s not too hard to spot him and she soon finds herself sliding into a group of teammates and significant others, fighting back a laugh at the look on Auston Matthews’ face. “Hi!” She drapes herself over Will’s back, actually laughing at the look on his face and clinging tightly to make him work at pulling her off.

“God, you’re a pain.” He announces, finally tugging her around. 

“Always.” Noah laughs, because this is easy, this is normal. Teasing Will just like always. “It’s what I strive to be, a thorn in your side.”

“You don’t have to try.” She miscalculated this gravely. He’s in the perfect position to dance his fingers into her most ticklish spots. “You just are.”

“Are you going to introduce us, Willy?” Someone asks dryly, one of the guys across from them. “Or just stand there pretending the two of you are in your own little world?”

Will’s cheeks flush-something unusual for him, he’s never embarrassed- but he says, “This is Noah.” Simply; like everyone should know who she is to him just from that alone, and it kind of seems like they do. A bunch of their faces light up and a few of them lean into each other and start whispering together. But she doesn’t get a chance to ask him what he has said about her, what kind of talk he’s been talking, before he’s listing names off of everyone around them, like she’s going to remember all these people.

There’s immediate chatter from almost everyone around her; it’s as if each one of them have been dying to meet her for a different reason. “Willy’s kept pretty tight-lipped about you.” Connor-James-Matt?-She’s already forgotten every name Will’s told her- says, almost too casually. “How long have you guys been seeing each other?”

“Before or after you turned Matts down?” Someone else adds eagerly, even as Auston groans, a little embarrassed.

Will’s fighting back a laugh next to her and she wants to kill him, honestly, she really does. But she settles for the next best thing, plastering her hand over his bicep, playing up a part that she isn’t. “Oh, you know. Fifteen years, on and off, right, babe?”

“Fif-what?” That’s Naz that’s narrowing his eyes at them; she’s pretty sure.

And now Will loses it, at either that, or the faces the rest of his teammates are making, and she pulls her hand away, laughing right with him. “What the fuck?” Tyler says flatly. “You really are just friends.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Will insists.

“He’s a terrible liar.” Noah says. “You’d know right away. His face gets all-”

“Nope.” Will pulls her away. “Think it’s time for a drink, don’t you?”

“Gets all what?” Someone calls. “All what?” 

She winks over her shoulder; she’ll get back to him later.

Noah doesn’t get around to him until much later, dragged to the bar with Will and then out dancing where they’re joined by a few of his fellow rookies. There might be times when they all go out looking to pick up, but this clearly isn’t one, every one of them out doing each other in the most ridiculous ways (Mitch wins; Mitch wins every time).

She gets back to the table a while later, when she’s dying of thirst and Will’s gone to the bar for refills, but it’s been long enough that she’s kind of forgotten she’s somewhat on the hot seat in this group. No one pounces immediately, but two of them- Morgan and Jake- move away from the team’s argument about a podcast they’ve been listening to and slide closer to her.

“So what’s the tell?” Morgan asks and Noah frowns for a second until she remembers earlier, laughing and declining. “Fine, sure. I admire the loyalty, I guess.” 

“It’s too easy for him to return the favor.” Noah laughs.

“Ok, so you’ve known Willy,” Jake says slowly, like he’s trying to calculate in real time. “For 15 years now?”

Noah nods. “Since we were four. Our dads got traded to the same hockey team and,” She shrugs. “Then again, and again, and again.”

Morgan kind of lights up, like this is the best news he’s heard all day. “What exactly was Willy like as a kid? Like has he always slept this much on any flat surface available? Or is that a weird thing he picked up in Sweden?”

“Always.” She laughs and then shrugs again. “I don’t know, I think he’s a lot like he is now. I don’t-I don’t think much has changed.”

And before she can even say anything else, the man himself is slipping in beside her, carelessly throwing his arm over her shoulders and gluing himself to her side. “Don’t talk to them.” Will demands. “They won’t have anything nice to say about me.”

“Rude.” Jake throws a wrapper at him, and it tangles in his hair but Will just shakes it out.

“Actually they’re asking me about you.” She tells him and he gasps dramatically.

“Don’t talk to them.” He demands again and she laughs.

“Why not?”

“I don’t want you ruining my image.”

“What image, pretty boy?” Morgan drawls, and Noah just laughs as Will retaliates by throwing the straw wrapper back at him but he doesn’t leave her side after that, remaining a comfortable weight pressed against her for the rest of the evening.

She doesn’t hate it. Stupid crush.

-----

“Happy Birthday.” Willy slides the gift across the counter but Noah doesn’t even reach for it, still looking down at the textbook she’s highlighting. She’s new-semester stressed still, the kind of stressed where her hair is constantly up in that bun for a few weeks and the bags never seem to leave her eyes. He can’t wait for another week or so, when she’ll finally crash and sleep for like, two days, a break she’s in desperate need of.

“What is it?” She asks skeptically and like, sure, the wrap job’s a little sketch, but Willy did it himself, no help from Mum or sisters. She should be, like, proud of his job mediocrely done. 

“Was I unclear?” He asks, and she gives him a look, reaching for it with an eye roll. 

“My birthday was last month.” She reminds him. “You sent me flowers.”

Willy knows. The flowers had been a placeholder because he’d wanted to be with her when she opened her real gift, to see her reaction, watch the smile grow over her face when she sees what’s in the box. “That was never your whole gift.” 

She smiles. “It could have been! It was just nice to know you were thinking of me.”

Willy stops just before he says something stupid, like that he’s always thinking of her. He hasn’t stopped thinking about her since they reunited last year and he probably won’t stop thinking about her, even after she finishes up with school and figures out her next step. It seems inevitable that fate will follow its same path they’ve travelled their entire lives, and they’ll end up crossing paths three times a year when Willy travels to whatever city she ends up in, knowing before they even meet for dinner that it’s not enough time, never enough time.

Instead he smiles and nods. “Come on, I’d never miss your birthday. Even if we have to celebrate late.”

Noah laughs. “Fair.” She says, finally reaching for the gift he’d laid out for her. And he knows what she’s going to find first, but that doesn’t change how nice it feels to know he nailed it when she opens the box of Swedish candies he’d brought back, a box of all her favorites. “Ohh!” She immediately pops one of her favorite chocolates into her mouth. “I don’t even care what the other thing is; this is amazing. Thank you!”

Willy laughs, kind of nervously. “At least look at it before you decide to stick it in a corner and never look at it again.”

She’s already pulling it out, peeling back the corners of the wrapping paper, and then looking up at him when she realizes it’s a jewelry box. He smiles encouragingly, feeling like he barely manages to get a full smile up before she’s opening, and then it stretches out fully in relief when she gasps. “Will.” She says finally, looking up at him, mouth opening and closing repeatedly. 

“Do you like it?” He asks hesitantly. He’d bought it on the spot the moment he saw it, the green of the peridot the exact shade of her eyes and her birthstone-or at least, it was, according to his sister. The necklace itself, a delicate chain dropping into a teardrop stone, this easy beauty that he couldn’t help associating with only her.  It’d felt too perfect to pass up. 

“I love it.” She says immediately. “This is-it’s-it’s perfect!” She gets out finally, and Willy breaks out into a smile, watching her lift the chain up to her neck. “Will you-” She breaks off, looking at him expectantly.

“Oh!” Willy gets it now, stands up to step behind her and gently takes the ends of the necklace. “Yeah, of course.” Noah lifts her hair and for a moment all Willy can concentrate on is the whiff of peach he gets suddenly. He fumbles the clasp for a second before he finally gets his shit together. “Why does your shampoo smell so good?”

She laughs, letting her hair tumble down again- another burst of peach to his nose- and turns to face him. “I switched it this summer. It’s nice, isn’t it?”

Nice? Maybe it’s because he spends all his time in a locker room with 23 other dudes, but it’s the best thing he’s ever smelled. He feels weird, knows it’s so not friends to want to pull her into his arms, just so he can hold her close and breathe in that smell, so he just nods.

“Yeah.” Willy says and his eyes are immediately drawn to her smile, to her fingers dragging the teardrop along the chain, and he- he flickers his eyes back up before he can go any lower. “It’s nice.”

-----

“You ready yet?” Will picks up his wallet off his island, where Noah’s been sitting for the last hour trying to tweak her resume one last time before submitting it to another job interview. “I’m going to miss my flight.”

“I’m going to kill you.” She says flatly. She’s only been calling that concern out to him since she walked in the door.

Will grins, throwing his arm around her shoulders and tugging her close into his side. If they weren’t about to spend the entire summer apart, maybe she’d fight it more, afraid that she’s taking too much from him to satiate her more-than-just-a-crush. But Will’s pulling his stupid Sugo hat on his head with the hand that’s not squeezing her close, and he’s about to leave her for four months, fresh off the devastation of the Bruins loss, so she curls in, greedily taking anything she can from him. “Save some cap space,” He hums. “If you did.”

“Oh my god.” She shoves him away. She takes it back. She takes it all back. She feels absolutely nothing for him; he’s the worst human she’s ever met.

Will pulls her back in and his arm stays around her the entire walk down to his car, when he only removes it so they can pack his bags in and then slide in their seats. As soon as he starts it and gets on the road, he reaches over again, just resting his hand on her knee.

“I can’t believe you’re just going to let me drive your car all summer.” Noah says, so she doesn't say something she regrets instead, like I love you, or worse, something about his hands and where else he can put them. 

Will glances at her briefly before turning his attention back to the road and Noah’s already grinning before he responds. “Don’t make me regret this.”

Shifting in her seat to better face him seems like a good idea until she actually does it and it means that his hand just moves further up her leg. She has to stop herself from looking at it, his fingers on the skin of her thigh. “You’ll still have a car when you get back.”

“The same car?”

“Maybe with a dent or two in it.” Noah teases, mostly just to annoy him. It works; he flickers his eyes over toward her in a glare. “I’m kidding.”

“You better be.”

“I’d totally get it fixed.” She continues, smiling when Will laughs. “Pristine condition. You’d never know.”

“Just how I want it.” He pulls up to departures and puts the car into park, so they can both step out; him to fly out and her to switch sides, meeting at the trunk. “Please don’t crash you or my car.” He says softly, pulling her into a hug.

“Please come back soon.” She counters, muttering the words into his chest.

It’s apparently not as quiet as she’d intended. “Wedding season.” He squeezes. “I’ll see you then.”

But that’s not what she meant at all. Noah doesn’t want him back for a weekend or two. She wants dry ink on a contract, locking him in to Toronto.

-----

When the start of the season comes around and Willy’s contract still hasn’t been signed, he can’t say he’s surprised to get a Snapchat from Noah, featuring her, Auston, and Mitch all pouting. 

“Come on.” He frowns at her, when they’re facetiming later that day- well into the night for him, actually. “You know why I’m doing this.” 

She pouts again, even though she’d been smiling only seconds before. “Doesn’t mean I have to like it. Why can’t you be in a standoff with management from here?”

“Why can’t you come work from home from here?” Willy counters and she actually huffs at him, but changes the subject.

When his holdout continues to last though, she does, finally, agree to come work from home from his place in Sweden, at least for a little, and Willy has to physically stop himself from fistpumping in excitement. It’s been too many months of seeing just her pixelated face through facetime, of conversations broken up by timezones, and late night calls that make him want things he knows he can’t have. 

It’s only a few days later but it feels like forever by the time that Noah is throwing herself into Willy’s arms the second that she exits the Stockholm Arlanda airport, and it’s only years of core stability training that don’t send them both flying to the ground. 

“How’s my car?” He teases, because it’s been a lot longer than the four months he promised and he just wants to see her smile, in person, without a lag from their stupid iPhones.

It works. “1 door left.” She chirps easily. “Don’t worry, Auston’s helping me fix it.”

“I’m sure he is.” Willy says darkly, because it was really no secret Matts still thought she was gorgeous, even if Willy was sure he’d never actually do anything about it. Pretty sure. At least 50%.

Noah laughs. “You’re hilarious.” She pats his arm a few times and pulls away to get in the car, but he wants to know about what. About Matts? It’s a legit concern, he feels. Maybe he’ll just fire off a text to Matts, just to be sure. “Will?” Noah’s leaning out of the passenger side. “Are we leaving or are we going to spend my whole trip here at the airport?”

“What if we are?” Willy shoots back, but he makes his way to the driver’s seat.

“If it meant that you were coming home?” Noah gives him a small smile. “I don’t think I’d even be mad.”

Willy gives her a tight smile. “Not yet.”

“Is it-” Noah makes a noise and then continues anyway. “Are you going to come home?”

“I want to.” She knows this; they don’t talk about his contract situation often, but they do, occasionally. “You know that.”

“Yeah.” She says softly. “I just-it’s getting close, yeah?”

Yeah, it was. The deadline was creeping closer and closer, with still no deal. He didn’t...love that, he’d say that for sure. He wanted to be back with the boys, playing; was ready to be back with Noah, for any time she’d give him. “Yeah.” He says, and then switches the topic completely, because he doesn’t want to think about what he’s going to do if this is the only time he gets with her until next fall. “You want to go to dinner with my family tonight?”

Noah’s eyes light up. “Yeah, oh my god!”

Willy laughs and takes the next exit on the highway, instead of driving further into town to go to his own place. Dinners with his parents and sisters is usually a quick cure to any spiraling thoughts about the signing deadline, and having Noah there today is even better. She’s a comforting weight against his side; a laughing presence with his mum as they gang up against him; a friend to his sisters after dinner, as they sit curled together in a corner of the living room whispering secrets and waving him away when he gets too close.

It’s a lot of things Willy doesn’t let himself think about, doesn’t let himself want, because Noah’s never given any hints she wants the same. And she’ll always fit with his family, because she grew up with him, with them, but one day she’ll find another guy who she just seamlessly fits into the side of, whose family she can easily laugh and joke with, because she’s that charming and friendly and nice. How could anyone not love her?

“I remember your sisters begging me to braid their hair at games all the time.” Noah says fondly, once she leaves their circle of secrets to come back to him. “God, I can’t believe how old they all are now.”

“Don’t remind me.” Will says darkly. His youngest sister just announced she has a boyfriend, her first boyfriend; he hates it the most.

Noah cackles, as if she knows what he’s thinking about, which, well, maybe she does, after the last hour. He doesn’t even want to know what they said about him (except he does, he really, really does). “If you promise to be nice to him, maybe she’ll let us go one a double date with them before I leave.”

Willy about blacks out when he hears her mention the word date and he’s pretty sure it shows on his face. “Really?” It’s the only word he can get out. Everything is wonderful; thank God, thank Jesus, thank who-fucking ever. This is the greatest-

Noah laughs. “Well I don’t think she’s going to let you meet him by yourself!” She nudges him with her shoulder. “But we could all go to dinner together!”

He takes it back. Everything is terrible and this is not even close to the greatest day ever.

They end up going for dinner with his sister and her boyfriend anyway-whatever, it’s fine.

“He was more than fine.” Noah protests, when they’re walking back to his place from the restaurant. It’s her last day here and Willy’s trying to soak up every bit of her that he can, so if that means walking to a restaurant in the cold, then so be it. “He was really nice!”

“He was, like, moderately nice, at best.” Willy pulls a face. 

“Don’t be that guy.” She shakes her head at him. “You know what guy I’m talking about.”

“Yeah.” He sighs. 

She nudges him. “You know, if you came back to Toronto with me, you’d never have to see him. Out of sight, out of mind.”

He wants to. He wants to so badly. He just...can’t. “You know I can’t.”

“But I don’t!” Noah says, frustratedly. “I don’t know why you can’t at all. You want to be there and they want you there. I don’t fucking get this!”

“Money. Terms.” He shrugs, sounding a lot more casual than he feels. “My agent’s taking care of things. That’s what he’s here for.”

“Well maybe it’s time to take care of things you want for yourself.” Noah mutters.

“What?” Will asks; he’s sure he heard her, but the bitterness is really unlike her.

“Nothing.” Noah curls into him and Willy wraps his arm around her shoulders without question. “Just cold. Left or right to get home?”

-----

Will’s text comes through in the middle of the afternoon, that they’re just ironing out the fine details and that he’ll be on a redeye that night.

You don’t even need to buy me a Christmas present this year. Noah sends in response. Best gift ever. 

When he doesn’t respond, though, she gets a little concerned. He always sends something back, always, whether it’s just a little emoji or some kind of quip, and that was prime for the taking. Call me at the airport? She follows it up. Do you need a ride when you get here? I still have your car.

Matts is grabbing me, going right to practice and meeting w kyle. Catch up later.

She actually startles at the response. He’s never, never been so short with her. It’s not even that the response itself was rude; it just...didn’t even feel like him. It feels like he’s pushing her away and the only thing she can think of is that he is. That he’d realized how she’d clung to him in Sweden in departures, the way she hadn’t been able to stop herself from running her hand down his back before pulling away, and he’d connected it to the fact that she’s definitely in love with him and was pulling away.

It’s the worst thought she’s had since she realized he was staying in Sweden for a while. She’d drunk a bottle of wine then to cope and she does the same now, but then she’s only more cranky the next morning when she’s still over thinking and she has a headache.

The knock on her door only makes her more annoyed, at least until she opens it and sees Will standing in the hallway. “Hi.” She breathes. She’d pictured him coming back to Toronto so many times, and look, she knows she doesn’t need to impress Will, who has seen her at her best and worst, but not once was she wearing sweats and the biggest sweatshirt that she owns. 

“Hi.” Will grins and she’s about to tell him to come in, but then he’s cupping her cheek and ducking down and it’s like time stops as he kisses her.

Noah can’t quite believe she was ever scared that Will didn’t love her. She doesn’t need him to say it, but he’s the one to pull away first, resting his forehead on hers, and they’re the first words out of his mouth. “I love you.” He kisses her again and god, she could do this forever. “You told me if I want something, to just take care of it myself, and I’m doing it. I don’t want to sit back anymore and let someone else love you. I love you.”

Will brushes his thumb over her cheek and Noah tries to gather a thought, any thought after a kiss that turned her brain to mush. “I don’t know when I started loving you,” She says, smiling when she sees the grin grow across Will’s face. “But I think it was before I even know what love was, and I don’t ever want to stop.”

The next kiss is the worst one yet, the smile still on his face (and hers), but that’s okay, Noah muses. They have time. 

[fleetingpieces]

Playing with the stars

What if Remus didn’t get injured and was drafted to play for the Dallas Stars?

This is a very self indulgent piece cause happy-sportsman-Remus pretty much lives rent free in my brain.

I’m fairly new to hockey and very much in love with it, but sorry in advance if there’s anything not hockey-accurate!

Once again, thank you Jazzy @inloveoknutzy for beta-ing this! <3 You’re amazing

And the beautiful world building and OCs belong to the amazing @lumosinlove Thank you so much for such a great story <3

CW: mentions of past abuse and mild spice.

Sirius Black was not a clumsy person. He was fearless, dedicated, precise and ruthless against his adversaries.

At least, that’s how he usually behaved.

Today however, Sirius was just stepping on the ice, glancing around the rink, when his eyes landed on a familiar player on the other end and he slipped. Sirius cursed as he grabbed onto the boards to prevent a fall, mentally slapping himself. He was never like this. And he already knew the man would be there, so why was he even surprised? Of course he was there. They were facing his team after all.

It was the first game the Lions would play against the Dallas Stars this season, but Sirius wasn’t sure if he was ready for it. Every game against the Stars was torture, and it had nothing to do with them being insanely good. Sirius liked that part actually, it meant he had to really push himself to beat them.

No, his problem came in the form of one very fit Remus Lupin.

Sirius hadn’t actually, properly seen Remus play in a couple of months, and the impact was even greater because of that. He watched as Loops skated effortlessly on his half of the rink doing warm ups. The way his body moved as he glided through the ice, his muscles flexing underneath his uniform, and the glint in his eyes were enough to take Sirius’ breath away.

Of course, everyone knew who Remus was. First draft, golden boy, star rookie a few years back. Sirius was slightly embarrassed of how well acquainted he was with the man’s career. He’d watched his every game since Loops had started playing for the NHL, and when he was alone in his house he would sometimes watch his old tapes, even though he would never admit that to anyone.

There was a loud clunk from one of the goalposts when Remus took a hard slap shot, and Sirius cursed again. His lithe body seemed to flow over the white surface, his stick an extension of his arm with how confidently he wielded it, and that fiercely joyful smile. Damn that smile. Sirius could only stare as Tyler Seguin went over and crashed into Remus, grabbing him into a headlock and saying something that sent the man laughing.

How the fuck was Sirius supposed to focus on the game with something so beautiful right there?

Shaking his head, Sirius went the other way with a frown etched on his face. 

“What are you so grumpy about?” said Pots as he went past him.

“It’s nothing,” Sirius replied. He leaned over his knees and breathed slowly, before slapping hard on his thighs once and setting his eyes on the thing that mattered right then. The puck.

And if there were a pair of amber eyes following his movements from the other end of the rink at that exact moment, he didn’t really notice.

The puck dropped not too long after and the game started. Sirius was first line and won the face off, swiftly passing the puck to Finn, who took it all the way to the Stars net where Dobby was ready for him. Before he could do anything else though, Loops cut his way and stole the puck from right under his feet. Sirius found himself staring in awe as Remus dribbled past one of their defensemen, before he snapped out of it and turned quickly to give chase.

“What the hell was that, Cap?” Pots shouted a few feet ahead of him. Sirius could almost hear the smirk in his tone.

He grumbled but did not lose sight of the puck in front of him. Those two seconds of distraction had been enough for Remus to reach their defensive zone; the way he teared up the ice was ridiculous. He took the shot, but it went straight into Kasey's glove.

Well, that was a way to kick start the game.

“Yeah, Bliz!” Finn congratulated, tapping his helmet.

When it was time for the first change, Sirius sat down heavily as Dumo’s line went out. He clasped his hands together between his knees, with his head bowed down. He had to focus. This was no time to admire what a great player Loops was. Or how obscenely good he looked in his gear.

The Lions knew him to be the dedicated, focused captain of the team, not this silly mess of a man who couldn’t take his eyes off another man from the opposite team. No, there was too much at stake for him to lose it like this. It didn’t matter that his friends knew he was gay, he couldn’t just flaunt it in front of the cameras and the wild crowd. 

He owed it to his team to get it together. He started picking up the pace after that, slowly falling into that absolute-hockey headspace, but still he felt that he couldn’t play his usual game. He kept getting slightly distracted for short periods of time, and by the end of the first period he felt incredibly frustrated with himself. It was mainly thanks to his teammates’ skills that the score was still tied 0-0.

He made his way back to the locker room behind them all, admonishing his own behaviour and telling himself he would do better in the second part of the game. He was so focused on his internal rant that he barely noticed Dumo falling into step beside him, and jumped when he placed a hand on his shoulder.

There was a knowing smile on his face that Sirius wanted to wipe off, but his tone was kind as he spoke, albeit slightly teasing.

“Mon fils, if you want to stare you have my full support, but perhaps we should focus on the game now, non?”

With that he chuckled, squeezed his shoulder and entered the locker room ahead of him.

Sirius took a second to stand outside the door, smiling at how simple and easy it was to talk about it with Dumo. The man was like family, a good kind of family. He’d taken him in and protected him against Sirius’ own mother, he’d given him a real home. It was such a Dumo thing to do, talk about his biggest secret as if it was the most normal thing in the world; Sirius could only shake his head as he followed behind him.

“Damn that Lupin!” was the first thing he heard as he stepped in. Finn was in the middle of complaining while making big gestures with his hands, and Logan and Leo were staring at him with fond, amused smiles on their faces. “It’s like every time you turn around he’s there! It’s insane how fast that man is.”

Talker came over then and slapped Sirius on the back.

“Don’t feel too bad Cap. He’s a beautiful man; sometimes I also find myself getting distracted by him.” At Sirius’ raised eyebrow, he added, “I stare with respect.”

He said it with a completely straight face, but Sirius saw the mirth dancing in his eyes. Some of the guys around laughed, adding a few comments of their own to the friendly banter. Sirius wasn’t sure what he’d done to deserve such an amazing team. Although the last thing he needed right now was to keep on thinking about Remus, so he tuned them out until Coach came in to go over their strategy.

Second period started in a similar way than the first had, only the pressure had increased. The players were marking each other more tightly, the puck kept going from the Stars’ zone to the Lion’s, and there had been no shots on goal so far.

Halfway through, the whistle blew as one of the referees called an offside on Dallas, and both teams skated over for the face off. As Sirius was getting closer, Loops skated in his direction, locking eyes with him as he circled behind him, and Sirius had to will his body not to jump when Remus started talking with his mouth close to Sirius’ ear.

“I wonder what got the great Captain Sirius Black so distracted?” he said in a playful tone, and Sirius didn’t have to look to know he was smiling.

He was taunting him, the bastard, and fuck if that didn’t ignite a fire inside Sirius’ body.

“Worry about losing your own focus Lupin, or you’ll end up biting the ice,” he replied in the same tone, and was rewarded with a soft chuckle.

If Remus wanted to play like that, Sirius would give him a performance to remember. It was a challenge, Sirius could feel his body thrumming with the adrenaline of it as he finally relaxed completely and played the way he was supposed to from the start.

Sirius managed to change the rhythm of the game with a fast pass he sent Pots’ way, that ended up being the first goal; then Logan scored another one right before the second intermission, setting the team’s spirits on a high. But then Remus scored two incredibly gorgeous goals in the third period that left Sirius slightly light headed.

They were tied.

And right now Sirius was having an internal battle as well as the one going on by the boards, as he and Loops fought for the puck, their bodies close together and Remus’ witty chirps in the air. It was taking all of Sirius’ years of discipline to keep his head in the game.

“Oh hey, you finally decided to come out to play?” Remus said as he bumped into him from behind and Sirius had to bite back a laugh, before spinning around and lightly sending Remus against the boards in retaliation.

“Look alive, Lupin!”

With barely two minutes left on the clock, Sirius managed to get the puck across to Talker, skated behind the net to position himself on the other side of the rink, shook off two defensemen as the puck headed his way again, and immediately whipped it into the goal, making the horn blare.

Screams and cheers erupted all over as the whole team crashed into him. They won, but it had been a very close call.

Nonetheless, it was over now and Sirius could go back to his hotel room and be alone for a bit. And probably watch some tape. The guys were going to grab food on the way, so Sirius excused himself to go lie down and whack himself for being such a klutz during the first half of the game. He was sure it would become easier with time, today he’d just been less prepared than he’d thought he was, and he vowed to make it better.

Just as he was heading outside through the empty hallway, a door opened and he turned around to see Lupin and Seguin coming out of their own locker room, and the sight was just a bit too much for Sirius right then.

Remus was in his game suit, his hair wet from the shower, with a stray curl falling on his forehead that Sirius desperately wanted to brush off. He was once more laughing at something Seguin had said, which made Sirius frown as he turned away, shoving his hands in his pockets.

There was nothing he could do about it, he wanted too many things that he couldn’t have.

Once he was outside, having escaped through the back door that led to the parking lot, he leaned against a wall before he lit up a cigarette and took a few long hauls, closing his eyes for a few minutes.

“Hey,” a voice said beside him and Sirius almost jumped out of his skin.

“Fuck, are you a ninja or something?” Sirius asked, bringing a hand to his heart, still holding the cigarette. He hadn’t heard Remus coming out.

Loops grinned as he came to stand right next to Sirius, but then his eyes focused on the cigarette on his hand and he lifted an eyebrow.

“Does your PT know that you smoke?”

“No, and there’s no need for him to know. I only smoke when I’m stressed.”

“What are you stressed about? You were amazing out there.”

“Not in the first period,” Sirius mumbled as he took another drag, but Remus heard him.

“And why is that?” he asked with a smirk, taking a step closer.

Sirius huffed in exasperation.

“Fuck Re, do you know how hot you look out there? Did you really have to make it that hard on me?” he lifted an eyebrow at the innuendo, which only made Remus’ wolfish grin go wider.

“Hmm. You didn’t expect me to go easy on you just because we’re dating, right?”

Remus placed a hand on the wall next to Sirius’ head, guarded by the darkness of the parking lot, and looked at him straight in the eye. The golden flecks in Remus’ irises seemed to have a light of their own, and Sirius could only stare, transfixed, as Remus’ long fingers reached up to snatch the cigarette right from between his lips and placed it in his own mouth. Without breaking eye contact, he took a slow drag and exhaled to the side before stubbing the fag against the wall.

“Hey!”

Remus’ hand came to rest on the other side of Sirius’ head, and he pressed their chests together, slotting his thigh between Sirius’.

“Y’know, if it was that hard on you,” he punctuated by pressing his thigh down ever so slightly, smiling as a whine sounded at the back of Sirius’ throat, “there are other ways to help you relax,” he said with a tilt of his head, before he ducked down to suck on Sirius’ neck.

“I...Re...”

“You’re not flying back to Gryffindor tomorrow, right?” Remus whispered against the skin just under his ear, pulling a breathy “No” out of Sirius that sounded more like a moan. “Good. I can stay with you all night then, yeah?” he added before he scraped his teeth against Sirius’ ear lobe, and Sirius had to blink a few times to clear his fuzzy head.

"I...quoi?" He had to resist the urge to slap himself. Use your words, Black.  “I mean...what?” Oh yeah, much better.

Remus leaned back just enough to look at him with a smile, tucking Sirius’ hair behind his ear.

“Will you be missed if I take you home?” he said in an amused tone, tilting his head in a way that was so adorable Sirius had to fight to keep another whine in.

“I thought you had a team dinner you couldn’t miss.” Sirius hesitated before continuing, “Isn’t it too risky for us to do this?”

“No,” Remus said immediately. Then, after a short pause, “I mean, I do, and it is, but...I haven’t seen you in almost a month, Pads. I...I missed you.”

Sirius’ heart melted. It’d been hard on both of them since the season had started; their tight training schedules and the fact that they lived in different cities didn’t allow them much time together. Being apart from Remus felt like being off balance, like his world was tilted to the side, and it had only settled on its right edge the moment Sirius had gone on the rink today and laid eyes on Remus again.

Sirius cupped Remus’ cheek, and the other man pressed against his touch, closing his eyes as a fond smile slowly made its way through his face.

“What?” Sirius asked.

“Do you remember that first time I asked you out?”

Sirius was surprised into silence for a few seconds, before he got what Remus was thinking about and he huffed a laugh.

Of course he remembered.

They had been in a very similar situation to the one they were in now, but still, so many things had changed.

The Lions had been playing against Dallas too on that day, only they were at Hogwarts stadium, with their chance at the playoffs at stake. And Sirius’ parents had been there.

Their words, their hard looks, Walburga’s hand digging into his shoulder...it had all been too much and Sirius had found himself spiralling down into the scared, closed off boy he’d used to be before he’d started playing with the Lions. Before he’d been accepted into a real team, a real family.

At that moment, all he could think about was pressure, reputation, and secrets.

He couldn’t let his parents find out. He couldn’t let his friends find out. And then, after the game, he’d been alone at the parking lot trying to get his breathing under control, ripping a leaflet to pieces when a soft hand was placed on top of his, and Sirius had looked up to concerned amber eyes.

To the one person he was supposed to avoid at all costs.

Remus had removed his hand from Sirius’, taking what was left of the paper from him and throwing it in the bin in the corner.

“Hey! I was using that!”

“What for?” He’d sounded genuinely curious, which confused Sirius as they were cordial with each other but they weren’t really friends.

Staring ahead, Sirius had avoided looking him in the eye as he ran a hand through his hair.

“There was something on my mind.”

“Hmm,” Remus hummed.

Sirius had glanced to his side and found Remus staring at him straight in the eye, before the other man stuffed his hands in his pockets and leaned on the wall beside him.

“Are you free?”

“Hm?” Sirius asked absentmindedly. He’d been too busy staring at the way Remus’ shoulders strained against his shirt to register what had been said.

The corners of Remus’ mouth turned up in a sweet smile, making Sirius’ breath stop completely. He couldn’t help but think he was gorgeous. 

“Are you free right now or do you have somewhere to be?”

“Oh. No, I’m done for the evening,” Sirius said, confused as to where that had come from.

“Well then, wanna go grab dinner?”

“I...what?” Sirius was perplexed. He’d not been expecting that.

“Dinner. With me,” Remus said, amused. What was going on? Was this...was Remus flirting with him? No, that couldn’t be it; Loops was known to be one of the most caring players out there, he’d probably seen that Sirius was struggling with something and just wanted to help. But even if that was it, he was not about to turn the man down.

“I...yeah. Yeah, I would like that,” Sirius said as a small smile spread over his face.

When Remus gave him a happy grin of his own, eyes shining bright, Sirius’ stomach had done a flip, and he’d known he was totally, and absolutely fucked.

He felt his body tingle just like it had back then when Remus trailed his fingers along his jaw, bringing him back to the present.

“Yeah, I remember,” Sirius placed his hands on Remus’ cheeks and kissed him, slow and steady, making Remus sigh and sag against him as he talked between kisses, never letting their lips part further than an inch. “You were so cute. And sweet. I was so fucking surprised that you asked me out, but I didn’t dare believe you actually wanted...well, me.”

Remus laughed, nudging at Sirius’ nose with his own. 

“How could I not want you? Did you look at you? Do you know how sweet, caring and amazing you are?”

Sirius groaned as he nipped at the other man’s bottom lip, making him jump in surprise. He let his fingers run among the wild tawny curls, pulling at them slightly at the back of Remus’ neck. Remus let his head fall back, and instantly felt Sirius’ mouth on the soft skin under his jaw, trailing warm open-mouth kisses until he reached his collarbone.

“Re,” he whispered, feeling his boyfriend’s chest rising and falling in short shallow breaths.

“Yeah?”

“Please take me home.”

[flameoutfics]

We’re Only Young and Naive Still Chapter 2

Chapter 1

Nora was scratched against Detroit which wasn’t a surprise. She hadn’t had a stellar debut and she hadn’t curried favor with Sutter, but the press had taken her first game and run with it. Everyone had told her to stay off of the internet and to not read articles about herself, but it was hard to ignore the things that popped up on her Twitter feed. There were already some reporters who asked to interview her and there were even a few names that she recognized and wouldn’t mind interviewing with. She had listened to Steve Dangle’s podcast on her morning commute to college occasionally and thought he’d been fair in his assessments. She didn’t think that he’d take cheap shots at her or try to make her uncomfortable. 

She also knew though that the publicity that was being offered to her was something that some athletes worked their entire lives for. Maybe if it was different, if she was naturally talented in the way that Sidney Crosby or Connor McDavid were, the attention would be warranted, but she was just a novelty. So for the moment, Nora politely declined the interviews with the canned rejection that she wanted to focus on contributing to the team and that she would consider at a later time. 

She was on the practice squad for the scrimmage before the game clad in a white jersey with some of the other two-way players skating on the ice against the permanent Flames and halfway through practice, she was already exhausted and soaked in sweat. “Tired, Hallisay?” 

“I’m fine,” Nora said and skated back to the ice with renewed resolve. 

“Take the face off,” Sutter yelled and Nora paired off against Matthew Tkachuk. Off ice he was just aloof but on ice, he was ferocious. He was the type of player that teams hated playing against and everyone wanted on their team. He glared at her from across the face-off circle, his cold, blue eyes almost wild as their coach approached them with the puck. Nora reacted just a split second faster to pass the puck over to Jusso for the break-away. The play was called off and everyone reset with new players at the face-off.

“Lucky,” Matthew said.

“Had nothing to do with luck,” Nora replied. 

“It won’t happen again,” Matthew said, but there was a lightness in his voice. 

“We’ll see,” Nora said, knowing that the odds of her squaring off against Matthew would be few and far in between. She was a fourth-liner at best; he was on the first line. As practice wrapped up, Nora skated to the bench and grabbed some Gatorade. Some of the guys headed straight to the locker room, but Nora lingered rink side. 

“You coming?” one of the trainers asked.

“I’m going to stick around here a little longer,” Nora said, “I want to get in a little more practice.”

“They won’t let you stay too long,” the trainer warned.

“I’ll take what I can get,” Nora said. She skated back on the ice and worked on puck-handling drills. She wished she had the hands of Pavel Datsyuk, but she didn’t. It was never her strong suit on the ice. 

“Move your top hand more, it’ll give you better control” a voice called behind the bench. 

Nora stopped for a moment and glanced over to where the voice was coming from. A small group of players, already showered and changed, watched. 

“Move your hand more,” Matthew repeated, gesturing with his own hand.

Nora shifted her hands to match his, “Like this?”

“Yeah, that’s what they teach you when you’re eight,” Matthew said. 

Nora saw red. Matthew could fuck off. “Well, we don’t all have dads who can get us on the best junior teams.”

A couple of the guys chuckled, but Matthew’s jaw clenched and his face turned red. Nora felt her stomach sink as the barb landed exactly where she anticipated. If things were different, Nora would have been contrite and even as it was, she didn’t like to be the type of person that made other people feel bad, but she wasn’t just going to roll over and take it either. She knew she didn’t have the same hockey knowledge that the other players did. They had had some of the best coaches, had had the time to play for hours after school, and had had opportunities that she couldn’t have dreamed of. So yeah, they didn’t have the same background, but she had worked her way to where she was, and she deserved to be there no matter what anyone else said. 

After they left, she redid the drill following Matthew’s advice. It was better; he was right. Nora gritted her teeth and did it again and again, adjusting her grip when she noticed herself slipping into her old routine. “Fuck,” Nora murmured. 

“You have to go,” the zamboni driver said as he waited for her to get off the ice.  

“Sorry,” Nora said sheepishly and skated towards the locker room. Everyone was already gone by the time she was ready to leave the rink. 

She pulled out her phone and followed the map back to the hotel. A few blocks away from the hotel, a text message popped up on her phone. 

From Liam: Congrats on your debut. 

Nora smiled and pocketed her phone away to respond to him later. She made a mental note to text him back later. 

“A few of us are playing FIFA later, if you want to join?” Mikael said as he caught her coming out of the elevator.

Nora smiled slightly, grateful for the invitation, “Whose room?” 

“Don’t know yet, but it’ll be in the group chat.”

“I’ll be there,” Nora promised. She headed to her room, sat on the edge of the bed, and pulled up the text that Liam had sent her. Thanks, you watched?

Liam’s response was almost immediate: I saw the highlights. How are things with the team? 

Nora wanted to tell him everything, she wanted to say how hard it was, how Sutter didn’t want her there, and the team didn’t want her there, and how all she wanted to do was go home. But she didn’t. Instead she typed out, I kind of fucked up with a teammate today. 

Liam wrote back, You’ll make the right decision, you always do.

Nora sighed. 

As promised, the open invitation in the group chat said they were planning on playing FIFA in Rasmus’s room in fifteen minutes and Nora showed up just a few minutes afterwards. 

“Are you any good?” Milan asked.

“I’m horrible at video games,” Nora said. 

“You’re on their team, then,” Milan said as he nodded over to the other half of the room.

Nora glanced over at Matthew who had been leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, still looking as pissed off as he had at the rink. 

“I think I’m gonna leave,” Matthew said, despite protests from their teammates. Nora couldn’t help but feel as though it was a reaction to her joining, a remnant from their fight at the rink. 

She remembered what Liam had sent her, “You’ll make the right decision, you always do,” and she knew what she’d have to do.  

After a few rounds of watching them play FIFA, Nora stood up to leave. 

“You know where Matthew’s room is?” she asked Elias as a new game was getting set up.

“I think he’s 219,” Elias replied. 

“Thanks.”

Nora talked herself into going over to Matthew’s room. She sighed and knocked on the door, hoping that he would already be asleep or in the shower. Instead, though, Matthew opened the door and glared at her. 

“Can we talk?” Nora asked. Matthew didn’t answer, but instead pushed the door open and made way for her to come in. 

“I’m sorry, for what I said at the rink. That wasn’t fair and it wasn’t true. You worked hard to be here and it wasn’t right for me to imply that it was because of who your father is or who your family is, so I’m sorry about it. And...you were right,” Nora said, “About my hands, it’s better your way.”

There was a long pause, “This is where you would usually apologize, too.”

“Why should I? I was just trying to help,” Matthew said. 

“No, you weren’t,” Nora said, “You were trying to humiliate me.”

“What’s your problem?” Matthew said, “Why do you think we’re all out to get you or something?”

Nora paused for a moment, “I know you don’t want me here. I know most of the guys don’t want me here, and that’s fine, but it’s hard not to think that way when you know otherwise.”

“What do you mean we don’t want you here?” Matthew asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion, “Did someone say something?” 

Nora pulled out her phone and scrolled through the group chat to the incriminating messages, “You did.” She held out the phone for Matthew to read the messages. 

His eyes widened in recognition and he went to apologize, but Nora held out her hand, “Don’t. It is what it is, but I know, so don’t play dumb. And I don’t expect us to be friends or even like each other, I don’t care about that, but I deserved better than that and I don’t deserve the type of comments that you made at practice either.”

Matthew didn’t say anything and to be honest, Nora wasn’t sure if there was anything left to clear the air, “See you tomorrow then.”

She headed back to her room and saw another message from Liam, Do you need to talk?

No, I’m good, but thanks, good night Li.

Nora had woken up before they were scheduled for breakfast and she looked on her phone for a local coffee shop to try before they were set to leave Detroit. She headed to a small, locally owned one just a few blocks from the hotel that they had passed in transit and ordered a vanilla latte. She grabbed a table towards the back and pulled up some of the NHL highlights 

“Can I join you?” A familiar voice asked and Nora glanced up to find Matthew Tkachuk awkwardly standing in front of her with a cup of coffee. 

“Were you following me?” Nora asked. 

“No, yes, but I was hoping we could talk,” Matthew said. 

“I don’t think there’s anything more to say,” Nora said, “I said everything I wanted to last night.”

“I didn’t,” Matthew said, “Can I?” he gestured to the empty chair across from her and Nora shrugged. 

“Is this a conversation that we should have here?” Nora asked.

“There aren’t too many people here and it’s better here than in the hotel, I guess,” Matthew said. 

“Okay,” Nora said. 

“I’m sorry for what I said at the rink yesterday and, more importantly, for what you saw in the group chat,” Matthew said, “You were right, you didn’t deserve that and we should have made more of an effort to make you feel welcome and to treat you like one of the guys.”

“I’m not one of ‘the guys’, though, and I’m not trying to be,” Nora said, “Things are different with me and I can’t help that.”

“I know, I didn’t mean it like that,” Matthew said. 

“I know how you meant it,” Nora said, “And I appreciate your apology.”

Matthew outstretched his hand, “Let’s start over?” 

Nora eyed up his hand, but shook it, “Sure. We better start heading back to the hotel anyways.” 

“What are you drinking by the way?” Matthew asked.

“A vanilla latte,” Nora said, “Why?” 

“In case I need to know for future apologies,” Matthew said. 

“Let’s hope not,” Nora said with a small smile.