#also. and this is absolutely critical: I Don’t Want To

[comradekarin]

now that I have time to process csm 192-194…. I don’t get the outrage with fujimoto for including the denji-yoru scene. I mean, this entire story is about coercion, grooming, sexual assault and indoctrination (and you can even look at it through a capitalism critical lens as well). being forced to see the assault is where the line gets drawn and not makima grooming denji? what reze did to denji (putting her arc aside for a second)? what the yazuka did to denji? denji’s organs being taken and sold on the black market? denji’s entire conception of sex, intimacy and satisfaction is directly warped due to not just his upbringing but the exploitive situation he’s in currently. even denji’s distrust of men (but his trust in women who take advantage of him more than the men do) is directly rooted in his childhood.

and this scene isn’t just about the violation of denji’s autonomy, but also asa’s. yoru has never really fully valued asa’s autonomy and wellbeing. yoru is prone to immature, childish bursts, willing to doom the people around her—even asa—for the sake of pettiness. so not only has denji been violated, but asa’s consent has not been granted for yoru to commit these acts. it feels as if yoru just weaponized whatever asa feels for denji and is just pushing buttons to see what works. denji didn’t even known it was yoru and not asa during those safe moments he felt he had until recently. you read yoru’s assault and it’s clear this is not a good moment. it’s uncomfortable and almost painful to watch. this thing that he’s been waiting on for a while, and it’s not at all what he expected. you watch denji go through this dissociative state, he’s confused, he’s lost and disappointed. what denji wants is intimacy and basic human decency, he wants to be treated like he actually matters, and the only reason he seems to be “wanted” is either because he’s chainsaw man or through sexual manipulation from women.

I can understand being uncomfortable with a scene like this—that’s the entire point, I won’t take that away from anyone—but I want to pose a question: what made denji’s traumatic experiences with assault more palatable prior to this scene? does it feel unnecessary because you’re finally forced to “see it”? denji HAS made progress and developed from part one (i.e his dynamic with nayuta, who despite embodying the same toxic, manipulative traits as makima, he’s able to love her unconditionally and recognize her childhood innocence, the same naivety makima exploited with him… his refusal to immediately succumb to the whims of the women around him, him wanting to help innocent lives around him, him admitting he wants sex and steak instead of just being content with scraps, etc). and he’s doing it all by himself. he doesn’t have a support system. he’s learning all on his own. I also want to point out that aside from pochita, absolutely no one in denji’s life cared about denji for denji. I love power and aki, but even their beginning relationships with denji rooted in what he could do for them (though, this obviously does evolve into something more genuine and warm). denji has little framework to go with and even less support to combat his experiences.

I also don’t think it’s fair to say “I thought we were over this since makima died”- no, we are not over this. this is not something you just “get over”. denji’s worldview is not going to be suddenly changed because makima died (he sees her in literally everything he does in part two. he can’t let her go… he loves her despite the hell she put him and his loved ones through). progress is slow, it’s not linear at all and often time disappointing when we see regression. I’d even argue that this scene doesn’t immediately ruin asaden, but that’s another convo for a different day.

I feel like people want denji to be this “perfect victim” and that’s just not what’s going on here. I don’t think fujimoto has a “grooming” fetish or whatever people are calling it. I genuinely want denji to recover from his assault, to discover a healthy mindset about sex and intimacy, to find someone who understands the extent of his loneliness (I believe that person can be asa, who shares that similar sentiment). I’ll re-evaluate this post as the narrative continues to unfold, of course, I am also very open to seeing what others think on this. my stance isn’t definitive.

[wander-wren]

sometimes i do get scared that i’m going to completely destroy my own life out of, essentially, bullheadedness. and all anyone can tell me to do is exactly the thing i’m so opposed to, so the odds don’t seem all that great??

[shorthaltsjester]

the venn diagram of people who actually understand pelor’s complexity and the people who understand vex’s character is a circle and a very small one at that

[midnightsslut]

I'm really hesitant to say this but I wonder if part of her (now) feels that at least towards the end, her rs with joe was darker than a lot of her past relationships. and she's had a lot of extremely dark extremely traumatizing past relationships 😭

yeah i'm not hesitant to say this at all anymore. we have to understand that her relationship with joe was a completely different order of magnitude in terms of seriousness. having someone that you thought saved your life when you were at your absolute lowest/weren't sure if you would even survive turn out to be the man that's killing you with his apathy is brutal. she put 6.5 years into that relationship and wrote about it over the course of half of her released discography. do you guys really think she would've left and salted the ground behind her if things hadn't turned traumatic in a way that no amount of concessions could fix? she literally just mashed up a love song about him (which she previously paired with call it what you want, no less) with would've could've should've. she essentially said she regrets him in spite of everything.

i honestly think the dissolution of their relationship and what it turned into might be the greatest pain of her life. i think a lot of fans will be shocked by the level of darkness on TTPD, because we still don't know the worst of it.

[genderqueersammy]

The most heartbreaking thing is seeing how Dean’s written to be a really fucking messy parentified child (because ofc no child can be a proper parent to another child) who tries and wants to do Sam good and yet fails and yet still loves and cares for Sam so deeply, and then finding out that the fandom wants him to be the same boring eldest child as a perfect parent troupe we’ve seen a hundred times

[working-dreamer]

It’s wild how shipping culture has changed so drastically over time on the internet.

In the old days people shipped characters who either had only one line of dialogue with each other, never even met, or not even from the same piece of media. It was the wild west and sure some ships were uncomfortable but people had the mindset to just block the tag and stay away from ships they didn’t enjoy.

Nowadays? It’s more like people have to clarify that their ship isn’t canon compliant, character adjacent, and story irrelevant otherwise they get a flood of comments saying “but this character isn’t like this in canon” and some people legitimately get angry if you’re not following the canon.

Like- shipping and fandom culture from what I understand it is about engaging with media in a way that caters to you. And if you don’t like a ship or show just… block the relevant tags and don’t engage in the ships? The internet isn’t supposed to cater to us- we have to cater ourselves to our internet environment. And no matter how many times people may harass others over a fandom or ship they don’t like, those ships are not gonna disappear.

The internet has just been getting worse when people have decided to place morality in their opinions by saying things like “if you enjoy the ship then you support (insert horrible thing here that’s usually completely unrelated to the ship itself)” when it used to be “eh, not my thing” and people just moved on.

And for the record this isn’t about a specific ship or anything- just an observation of how fandom has evolved (and regressed) over the years and I find it fascinating from a sociological perspective cause we still don’t know how having the internet from birth affects the development of kids and how that affects how they interact with others- isn’t that scary?

I know that’s slightly unrelated but the way people engage in media has been changing over they years and that also involves fandom and the maturity level thereof in the internet space and someone smarter than me could probably write a whole thesis paper about fandom culture and how the internet has hindered the social development of people and how that affects community specifically from a fandom lens.

Just- for your sanity younger internet children: it’s not worth harassing others over something as trivial as ‘it’s not canon that this character kisses another character.’ Just find ships you like. Block ships you don’t. And just enjoy your time doing what you like!

You can’t control the internet but you can nurture your little corner of it.

[izzehands]

[phregnancy]

I’ve already said this before, but people need to realize that criticizing someone doesn’t mean that you’re hating on them. You just want them to do better.

And yeah we joke around that Phil zones out while Dan yaps but he obviously still does listen to him (like with f1).

(I also hate the “accounts are overcompensating loving phil with also being extra mean to dan as “jokes”. It reminds me on twt how people try to compare it to the hate Phil used to get. But that’s just a side note.)

anon you are perfect. no notes <3

[paperbag1999]

i’m someone who sees things in like constant shades of grey and i quite often try to see the light side of things and i think i’m constantly reminded of all the great stuff i have in my life. also i am full of gratitude all the time and also every time something bad happens to me i’m like yknow what this makes sense🫶 all these bad things suck but they lead to so many amazing things i’m hyper aware of the butterfly effect. so uhm i’m a pretty resilient person if i do say so myself. so today when i came to the realization of OH. i’m having a BAD YEAR!

[elliesgaymachete]

Critters, if they pull a trials of the take and have a few guest stars in while the party is split, who do YOU want to see as a guest star??? Reblog and put in the tags

[inkykeiji]

my boyfriend’s mom will be out all night on a date so i get to play housewife tonight n make the boys dinner :)

[itspileofgoodthings]

Taylor returning over and over to the falling through the ice accident in the Bolter—everything to me

[dreadpiratesilas]

Izzy for Bingo.

[shego1142]

I super recommend Colleen Christensen for more info on eating without food rules and eating intuitively!

Her videos are helping me unravel a lot of issues I have struggled with regarding food!

Just the simple act of not shaming yourself for craving and or eating specific foods can be so powerful and beneficial to your life/mental health (which in turn affects all of your health)

"craving a food means your body needs something that food can offer" now what the fuck does my body need with an ice cream

[pepsicoughdrops]

the eternal dilemma…

(he/it)

[letstrywritingmaybe]

In need of fluff, but when am I not? For real though I’m really missing my fluffy roots, I’ve completely lost the narrative.

Addition… what if I… what if I really did try to write a song fic a day? (I know I know, I should at least get through the midnights album fic BUT I have so many other artists I ride for and there are so many other worthy songs that just completely make me melt) I already know which song I would name it after too… the question is, do we start with that song or end with it? Hm…

Update 2: I’m in wildly different but similar places for my WIPs… also kaishi is involved with both. I’m thinking thoughts… a jealous shinichi over my queen is the current theme that I keep losing track of with the collab fic, but i kinda want other contenders… So many options, with so many better choices. I’m also thinking about the difference with the notp too… for the record my notp and the canon ship are two different ships, I will always refer to them this way cause I don’t even like typing the ship names. No negativity in my life! Be gone!