#also there’s a LOT more in this issue that’s interesting but. that’s for my other post

[sunnyuto]

Every time I see a new doctor or a doctor I haven’t seen in a while, I bring a three page printed document with all of my diagnoses, medications and dosages, specialists, family history, the history of my cardiac arrest, and the history of whatever issue I’m there to address with them, for them to keep. It’s been an instant hit multiple times. I initially made it because I got tired of answering the same four questions about the cardiac arrest specifically at every single doctor’s appointment but it ended up being super helpful even beyond that.

If you’re like me and struggle to create and maintain habits and also take a lot of medications, I recommend getting a 4-times-a-day pill tray from your local pharmacy and using it as a four week pill tray so you only have to remember to fill your pills once a month instead of once a week. It immediately worked to make me much more compliant with my medications.

If you have trouble swallowing particularly large pills, try taking them with pudding, applesauce, or a thicker liquid instead of water or another thin liquid. If that still doesn’t help, talk to your pharmacy and see if it’s possible to get your medication in a liquid form or a chewable form. You may have to get it compounded in order to do this, which can be more expensive, but if you can swing it then it’s worth it to actually be able to take your pills comfortably (or at all).

As unfortunate as it is, framing an issue you’re concerned about as an issue that someone around you is concerned about, especially if that person is a healthcare worker or other medical professional, tends to get you more objective treatment from doctors. If I get the sense then I’m gonna get pushback from doctors for expressing interest or concern about something, I always frame it as something that my nurse mother observed and was concerned about.

If your weird method works, as long as it’s not dangerous, do it, even if it’s weird. I leapfrog my groceries up the stairs because I can’t go up and down the stairs multiple times. I often do my dishes sitting down. I have a folding step stool in my shower because it’s not big enough to fit a full shower chair but sometimes I can’t be standing. It’s not weird if it works.

I've been disabled for almost 29 years. Here's what I've learned.

Tablets sink and capsules float. Separate out your tablets and capsules when you go to take them. Tip your head down when taking capsules and up when taking tablets. Liquigels don't matter, they kinda stay in the middle of whatever liquid is in your mouth.

If your pill tastes bad, coat it with a bit of butter or margarine. I learned this from my mom, who learned it from a pharmacist.

Being in pain every day isn't normal. Average people experience pain during exceptional moments, like when they stub their toe or jam their finger in a door, not when they sit cross-legged.

Make a medical binder. Make multiple medical binders. I have a small one that comes with me to appointments and two big ones that stay at home, one with old stuff and one with more recent stuff.

Find your icons. Some of mine include Daya Betty (drag queen with diabetes), Stef Sanjati (influencer with Waardenburg syndrome and ADHD), and Hank Green (guy with ulcerative colitis who... does a bunch of stuff). They don't have to be disabled in the same way as you. They don't even have to be real people. Put their pictures up somewhere if you want; I've been meaning to decorate my medical binders with pictures of my icons.

Take a bin, box, bag, basket, whatever and fill it with items to cope with. This can be stuff for mentally coping like colouring books or play clay or stuff for physically coping like pain medicine or physio tape.

Decorate your shit! My cane for at home has a plushie backpack clip hanging from the end of the handle and my cane for going places is covered in stickers. All of my medical binders have fun scrapbooking paper on the outside. Sometimes, I put stickers and washi tape on my inhalers and pill bottles. I used my Cricut to decorate my coping bin with quotes from my icons, like "I've seen enough of Ba Sing Se" and "I need you to be angrier with that bell".

If a flare-up is making you unable to eat or keep food down, consider going to the ER. A pharmacist once told me that since my eye flares can make me so nauseous that I cannot eat, then I need to go to the hospital when that happens.

Cola works wonders for nausea. I have mini cans of Diet Pepsi in my coping bin.

Shortbread is one of the only things I can eat when nauseous. Giant Tiger sells individually-wrapped servings of shortbread around Christmas or the British import store sells them year-round. I also keep these in my coping bin.

Unless it violates a pain contract or something, don't be afraid to go behind your doctor's back to get something they are refusing you. I got my cardiologist referral by getting in with a different NP at my primary care clinic than who I usually saw. I switched from Seroquel to Abilify by visiting a walk-in.

If you have a condition affecting your abdomen in some way (GI issues, reproductive problems, y'know) then invest in track pants that are too big. I bought some for my laparoscopy over a year ago and they've been handy for pelvic pain days, too. I've also heard loose pants are good for after colonoscopies.

Do whatever works, even if it's weird. I've sat on the floor of the Eaton Centre to take my pills. I've shoved heating pads down my front waistband to reach my uterus.

High-top Converse are good for weak ankles. I almost exclusively wear them.

You can reuse your pill bottles for stuff. I use my jumbo ones to store makeup sponges and my long skinny ones to hold a travel-size amount of Q-Tips.

Just because your diagnostics come back with nothing, it doesn't mean nothing is wrong. Maybe you were checking the wrong thing, or the diagnostic tool wasn't sensitive enough. I have bradycardia episodes even though multiple cardiac tests caught nothing. I probably have endometriosis even though my gynecologist didn't see anything.

You can bring your comfort item to appointments, and it's generally a green flag when someone talks to you about it. I brought a Squishmallow turkey (named Ulana) to my laparoscopy and they had her wearing my mask when I woke up. I brought a Build-A-Bear cat (named Blinx) to another procedure and a nurse told me that everyone in the hall on the way to the procedure room saw him and were talking about how cute he was. Both of those ended up being positive experiences and every person who talked to me about my plushies was nice to me. If you don't feel comfortable having it visible to your provider during the appointment, you can hide it in your bag and just know it's there, or if you're in a video appointment, you can hold it below frame in your lap.

Get a small bucket, fill it with stuff, and stick it in your bed (if you have room for it). I filled a bucket with Ensure, juice boxes, oatmeal bars, lotion, my rescue inhaler, etc. in October 2023 in anticipation of my laparoscopy and I still have it in my bed as of January 2025.

If your disability impacts your impulse control (e.g. ADHD, bipolar disorder), you should consider setting limits around your spending -- no more than X dollars at a time, nothing online unless it's absolutely necessary, and so on. Or, run these purchases by someone you trust before committing to them; I use my BFF groupchat to help talk sense into myself when I buy stuff.

Feel free to add on what you've learned about disability!

[victoryai]

SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL HOUSES

You can reblog↪️ but please have the decency not to steal 🚫 my work.

🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱.

🚍SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 1ST HOUSE: This year's focus is doubled on you. This year is almost like taking a journey back to the year you were born. This year has your name written on it. It's going to be easy for you as you'll feel so much in your own skin. This is a year to solidify your life purpose.

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 2ND HOUSE:This wonderful year (with more favourable positions) is pointing to an increment in your finances, wealth and self esteem. If afflicted, it may be pointing to financial losses. If your planning to change your diet or eat more healthy , then go for it this year. You'll see the changes

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 3RD HOUSE: This nervous 😆 year is bringing forth more school work to you 😂. It's inviting a lot of movement. You might have a new sibling too. I had this the year when my lil sis was born. I also wrote a major exam and became a senior in 🎒 school that year and was learning new courses. You're always on the go. Stay away from crazy gossip with friends pls 😂

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 4TH HOUSE: This year ahead shows a lot of staying indoors. I had this when I was 2 so I was always with My Momma and indoors too. Where else would a two year old child be? 😂. If you're grown already you might spend more time with a lot of extended family members. If afflicted it might show issues at home. You might buy a new house or reconnect with family more😊

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 5th house . This year you might get pregnant 😮 so take it easy 😉. If you're looking for love (more casually)there's a 70% chance you'll get it. if your a parent already, focus on your kids pls. It might also be a year you decide to take things light and fun . However it might also indicate that your taking a short time educational course. If you love Casinos, you're likely to bag 💰 it this year. Go baby!

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 6TH HOUSE: I see that someone here needs to start developing good habits and taking extra care of your health. Pls avoid getting into conflicts or court cases. You might be if service to persons who need help. If you're a doctor or health worker expect more in your plate. You need to be clean this year 😮‍💨

🚍SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 7TH HOUSE: So chessy 😊, yet so unlike you. For most people, this will indicate a new love affair or meeting the one 💘, being a spec, random compliment from strangers. For those that are married, take care of your spouse and marriage too. For a few , it could make you uncomfortable 😣 because you're sitting in the house of other people who are so different from you. You might not understand yourself lol.

🚍SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 8TH HOUSE: This year is exploring your natal 8th house. With a year like this there's a chance of entering into a joint account or business with someone else. Make Sure you can trust that person. You might also receive large amount of shares or inheritance . When this year ends you could be richer or poorer. If you're considering surgery, you might go ahead this year.

🚍SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 9TH HOUSE: 😋 This seems to me like someone is about to travel and stay away for a long time. Matters of education also arise too. You might start or finish college. The year I had this, I travelled and started going to college . You just want to explore the world and meet new minds. Religion is also highlighted.

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 10TH HOUSE: This year is about your job and your boss. Your energy is directed towards your job. You might also become famous. Get an increment or promotion. Become a role model for many too. Its going to be a year packed with responsibility too

🚍 SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 11TH HOUSE: Those midnight wishes seem to be coming true😇. Those long term goals manifesting. You might be very different and innovative this year, maybe you become more interested in technology. Make more friends. Do something online and become famous.

🚍SOLAR RETURN ASC IN NATAL 12TH HOUSE: 😭😭😭The year I had this , it seemed like some bad luck just followed me. I had a few losses too(not financially tho) I almost fell into depression but I'm glad I didn't. I started to learn astral projection. I was surprised that I easily let go of addiction too😊. If you're familiar with this house it wouldn't be hard for you

[mylovesstuffs]

OT13 reaction to the idea of a threesome with another member

Request: hey!! can you possibly do !husband!svt reacting to having a threesome with another member?? kinda like if they even would consider it, or who they would choose out of all the others. thank you so much already!! + yes hubby!svt x wifey!reader x another member is what i meant!! sorry for being unclear about that!!🤍

A/N: Some of these choices might make it seem like I’m shipping, lol, but anyway—I hope this is what you wanted! I scheduled this without saving it to my drafts for a recheck, so don’t mind any mistakes I might’ve made. Tumblr doesn’t save changes, but I have way too many pending requests, and it’s getting overwhelming. I couldn’t complete the other requests because of this Tumblr issue, but today, I had an epiphany: I can just post directly instead—at least until Tumblr gets back to me. So please ignore any typos, formatting errors, etc., etc.

This is my personal opinion and perspective. It may not accurately reflect their real-life personalities or behaviors.

Would Definitely Consider It (Under the Right Circumstances):

Jun – He’s the wildcard. He has a flirtatious and experimental streak, so he wouldn’t mind trying it if you initiated the idea. Minghao will be his choice (bahahah).

Hoshi – He’s adventurous, playful and very open-minded. He’d probably be the one to bring it up first just to see your reaction. He loves excitement and if it’s something you’re curious about, he’d be down. Woozi would be his first choice. He’d love to see his usually composed bestie in a wilder setting lol.

Mingyu – He’s open-minded and likes pushing boundaries in relationships. He’d probably joke about it first but if you were genuinely interested, he’d consider it. I think his choice would be Wonwoo or Jeonghan. They already have that chem, and they are someone Mingyu trusts completely.

Minghao – He’s open to new experiences but only if it’s something you really wanted. He’s emotionally mature enough to separate pleasure from deeper love. Jun will definitely be his choice (yes they're each other's choice). They have a natural bond and he’d feel most comfortable with him in such an intimate situation.

Would Maybe Consider It (But It’s Complicated):

Dokyeom – He’d turn beet red at the suggestion but wouldn’t be completely opposed. But the real problem is he’d get too emotionally attached and overthink things. In my opinion, I think his choice would be Mingyu. It’d feel like a fun, spontaneous thingy with someone he already vibes with.

Vernon – He’d be very nonchalant about it and respond with, “I mean…if you want to.” But deep down, he might not actually care enough to make it happen. Dino would definitely be his choice for a threesome. He’d pick someone who’s also laid-back, so nothing feels awkward.

Dino – He’d need a lot of convincing. He might go for it if it was positioned as a ‘fun experiment,’ but afterward, he’d probably get shy or maybe overthink. His choice will probably be Hoshi. There’s already a strong bond, and it would feel more like a game than anything super serious.

Absolutely Not (Too Loyal, Too Possessive, or Just Not Into It):

Seungcheol – This man is territorial. You are his, end of discussion. Suggesting it might even make him a little jealous and possessive.

Jeonghan – He loves to tease about things like this but would never actually go through with it. Deep down, he’s high-key possessive and wouldn’t want to share you.

Joshua – He’s too traditional and reserved. He doesn’t want to take even a 0.001% risk of anything that could potentially affect the relationship.

Wonwoo – Not necessarily out of jealousy, but he sees sex as something really personal and wouldn’t want you or him to share that level of intimacy with anyone other than each other.

Woozi – He’d be so so uncomfortable with the idea. He’s private and values intimacy in a one-on-one setting.

Seungkwan – Absolutely not. He would take the idea as a personal attack, wondering why he alone isn’t enough for you.

[hairscare]

as someone who has used a cane for over 2 years now ive noticed a really interesting bias against canes by able bodied people in comparison to other mobility aids. when we were at the same college my roommate used forearm crutches and i had my cane, and it became a joke to us how much more helpful and accommodating people were towards him (of course still overall bad- but better). the main example we always talk about is that people would fall over themselves to help him with doors, even to the point that it would get inconvenient (like trying to open the door to the accessible bathroom for him but in the process standing in the bathroom), meanwhile people would let doors shut on me without batting an eye. he started using a cane recently so i asked him about if there was a difference in how people treated him and he said there was a noticable difference and that people were less eager to help him when he was using it in comparison to the crutches. i have a few theories as to why:

1. most canes you see in media being used by someone who isnt elderly are aesthetic canes, and so people dont take it as seriously if a younger person is using one

2. unlike a lot of mobility aids, canes are one handed, which gives the illusion of an extra hand free. what people dont understand is that yes, while i do have an extra hand free, i am using that hand double time since the other one is occupied. also a lot of things require two hands (especially for someone with a disability) so doing everything one handed can be tough. i use my dominant hand to hold my cane since my pain is worse on my left side, which means that the hand i do have free isnt one i can use to type things in or write, so if i need to do that i have to put my cane under my arm and use my right hand

3. canes are taken less seriously as mobility aids since to an able bodied person they dont look as severe, which gives the impression that cane users are more capable than other mobility aid users. while yes, it is true that canes can be a starter mobility aid that will eventually be traded for another type as symptoms progress, that doesnt mean that canes are for Disability Lite. me and my roommate used our mobility aids for similar reasons and have had very similar pain experiences, we just used different aids. canes are also a significantly cheaper option compared to other aids and are easier to find in stores, and so are much more accessible. besides all that though, there shouldnt even be a bar for how disabled a person needs to be to recieve help, which id argue is a very controversial opinion to have anymore

4. canes are still a joke. they are still widely used as a funny prop to indicate that someone is old, incapable and feeble. even on tumblr i still see people utilizing canes in this way in artwork and memes, and thats obviously very alienating. mobility canes arent props, and you probably should not draw someone with one unless you actually intend to have that character need it

in my short 2 years of using a cane i have already faced so much ableism, most of which has come from young left leaning people. of course theres a wider issue of disabled people being the odd group out in the effort to stop bigotry since literally everyone will punch down on us. there are also certainly privileges to using a cane compared to other mobility aids. but its also incredibly strange how invisible they are, like people forget that i have one for a reason

[guthraiel]

officially finished kcd 2 so now im gonna complete the younger hans and henry meeting fic and some art wips i have because my brain is overtaken by this game HOLY FUCK

(spoilers under cut but its just my rambling mentioning the ending and some plottwists really)

ive been a hansry truther since the first game in the sense that henry is sooo clearly a bisexual loser and so is hans. imo the two most logical choices for henry's romance are hans and theresa, who, in each of the games they're romancable in are the ones who henry has known and trusted longest. theresa in KCD 1 is his childhood friend, the one person who shares his survivors guilt and the memories of skalitz. while in KCD 2 hans is the one person who has been with henry throughout this whole thing and never really left his side (excluding the arguement at the start and the various kidnappings and being taken hostage)

like either way imo those are the most 'cannon' romances to henry and i really wish kcd 2 adressed the existence of theresa a bit. she's by far the most interesting woman in the franchise since warhorse does lowkey struggle to write women in a way that's logical. i mean the way every female around henry throws herself at him except his main LI's who all follow some version of the girlboss trope is... man come on. i actually do really like both rosa and katherine, but i think there could've been just a teensy bit more done with them

also like what the fuck is up with henry's mother. idk if her name or any personality being excluded is meant to be an artistic choice to show how henry remembers her as just 'mom' and ignores any other part of her character but like wtf. both radzig and martin get names, a backstory and a deep relationship with henry while his mother is just. there. i get that this is the 15th century but in the first game it's clear in the tutorial that hal and his mom are CLOSE like i wish we got to see a bit more of that tbh

i have words to say about samuel as a character but none of them are appropriate for tumblr so i will abstain. tldr i actually like him a lot henry getting a brother-butnotreally is actually really sweet. like despite the fact that he lost his family and everything dear to him there is still someone who cares about him in a familial way. i hope we'll het to see more of him in some of the upcoming dlcs although i doubt it since he can technically die during the game (and i'm pretty sure in a canon run you should leave him behind)

okay last point to the characters is one ive had since kcd 1 but THE NAMESSS WHY ARE THEY NAMED THATTT

henry of skalitz my ass bro THAT'S JINDRA 😭😭 jindříšek even!! like i get that ř may have been an issue but just have him be jindra instead of jindřich then???

hans capon is just a bit silly like jan ptáček could be a pronouncable name, not to mention there is SO many characters named jan already so even Jan Capon i could lowkey get behind more

also i do fully believe non czech speakers miss out on the game a bit, there are parts of bg dialogue that are in czech and add just a bit of humour and immersion to the game (like in taverns, markets or during henry's nightmare in suchdol where the skalitz/maleshov people hiss 'you killed us')

okay ttldr this game is really good i just needed to yap since my friends whove finished it dont share any of my sentiments

if u have thoughts to share please do im curious what impression others got

[interact-if]

Black History Month Author Spotlight: Kiki

Our third edition of the Black History Month Author Spotlight series, features Kiki (@scapegoated-if)!

(I’m rly happy to have gotten to know Kiki better through the feature, and the interview contains really interesting insights on gender and race-locked main characters in interactive fiction, among other things! If you haven’t yet played Scapegoated (and if you’re a fan of Infamous/music IFs, definitely give it a go!)

Author: Kiki Born and raised North London, but ethnic background Jamaican (my parents are a part of the Windrush Gen)

Games: Scapegoated (slice-of-life, music, hollywood, '70s)

Short blurb: Scapegoated is about a female musician in a band that is seguing into an acting career. She is facing a lot of blame and scandal regarding the split between her band that happened in 1968. Not only are a lot of the general public hurt and angry about it, but so is an infamous serial killer that has been terrorising the west coast...

Quotes from the interview

I’m from North London. My parents moved to London when they were children from the Caribbean and are a part of the Windrush generation. I am a black, bisexual woman growing up in the UK, a place that tends to disguise its wider prejudices as a classist issue in all cases. […] A huge part of my love for music is strongly intertwined with my relationship with my late father. He passed away in June of 2023, and he was very much so kickin’ it in the ‘70s. He was a DJ throughout his life, so the legacy of LPs that he left behind was unspeakable and very ‘70s.

Read on for the full interview!

Tell me more about yourself! What are some things new readers or long-time readers might not know about you?

I graduated from a Russell Group university with an English Literature BA (Hons). I think a part of me has always wanted to be a writer in some capacity; I know that I’ve always wanted to write a book. So, I think beginning this IF has existed for me as a gateway to see what that would be like. I thought of it as a brainteaser–the prospect of exploring different outcomes and different pathways that a character may undertake. It has been challenging, dare I say more challenging than writing an actual book, but that’s exactly what I wanted out of this process.

Can you tell me a bit about what you’re working on right now and your journey into interactive fiction? What inspired the game/story you’re currently writing?

My best friend introduced me to the world of interactive fiction one day last year. She introduced Infamous to me and asserted that I would really like it because I’m a huge music nerd. Of course I fell in love with the characters and the world, but I also fell in love with the format of IFs. 

A huge part of my love for music is strongly intertwined with my relationship with my late father. He passed away in June of 2023, and he was very much so kickin’ it in the ‘70s. He was a DJ throughout his life, so the legacy of LPs that he left behind was unspeakable and very ‘70s. I am a huge music lover with such a wide-spanning eclectic taste, but the period of music post-”Dylan going electric”, post-”Elvis being on the out”, Quincy Jones (rest in king) and Beatlemania is just everything to me, so the idea for Scapegoated came into my life in a very natural way. I knew that whichever story I told, I wanted it to explore the Sunset Strip, groupies, rock ‘n roll, The Beatles, The Manson Family and Cher all at its core. 

I am of the opinion that coverage of the ‘70s music scene has been run into the ground lately. There has been a resurgence of nostalgia within the public consciousness when reflecting upon this time due to Daisy Jones & The Six, which was one of my favourite shows the year it was released. So, including Hollywood and murder was my attempt at innovation.

How has your identity, heritage/background, upbringing, or personal experiences influenced your storytelling or writing process? OR How does your work feature aspects of your identity / experience?

I’m from North London. My parents moved to London when they were children from the Caribbean and are a part of the Windrush generation. I am a black, bisexual woman growing up in the UK, a place that tends to disguise its wider prejudices as a classist issue in all cases. I am writing Scapegoated as someone that has only been to the US twice for two weeks at a time. I am writing Scapegoated as someone that can only relate to two aspects of my main character. I am writing Scapegoated as someone that has experienced discrimination and has been scarred by instances of discrimination. In university, I tended to be quite outspoken; in my first year, I felt quite ostracised by my predominantly white cohort during the BLM movement, because I seemed to be the only one willing to speak out in favour of it.

When I first wrote Scapegoated, I was inboxed on Tumblr and replied to on the Choice of Games Forum with genuine curiosity about my choice to gender and race lock my protagonist. This is an excerpt of my response:

I didn’t want to have a self-insert MC because I wanted to ensure that the conversations had revolving these social issues and the murders that unfold aren’t danced around. Perspective is an extremely important factor in that, and I want to ensure that the MC is directly involved–rather than just there as things happen because it wouldn’t be interactive. [...] Initially when I planned this story, before it was titled and the only thing I knew was that I wanted to write an IF about the '70s music scene, it was neither gender or race locked [...]. But I did toy with my ideas by self-inserting (I’m a black woman) when I was attempting to figure out the logistics of gameplay. That’s when I realised that due to the time period and all of the change that was happening at the time, social issues had to be discussed.

To this day, I am extremely proud of my decision and the conviction in my decision. I asserted a level of loyalty to the story I am telling in a way that I didn’t know I was capable of; retrospectively, I think I took a kind of power in it. But I really love the story I am telling and the range of representation. 

I am trying to work the line of prioritising my vision, all the while giving weight and importance to my readers’ opinions in the way that these very interesting and thorough opinions deserve. It warms my heart that even one person might care about my characters just as much as I do.

what are some of the most rewarding or challenging aspects of writing Interactive Fiction for you?

Songwriting. I’m tragic at it, but I like to think I’m self-aware enough. There are different characters with different voices and different reasonings behind their songwriting styles. I struggle to ensure that their songwriting oozes with their individual personalities. 

What does your writing process look like? Any rituals or habits? Any tips, tricks, philosophies or approaches that have worked very well for you?

Story beats. However, planning and writing can exist as two entirely different realms to me. What I think the story may be, can develop into something entirely new all on its own once I begin to write. Sometimes characters that I think I know transform into someone entirely new once I start to get to know them through writing their dialogue. I’ve experienced this with several characters already. On the contrary, some characters are so secure in my mind that they can’t be anything other than who I’ve introduced them to myself as.

I really love the writing process I’ve conjured up. It hasn’t failed me yet, but it isn’t secure–writing can never be anything other than an insecure process. Writing, for me, always remains in a constant stage of planning.

Do you have favourite interactive fiction games, characters, scenes or authors that you’d like to recommend?

I have received a lot of IF recommendations due to how new I am to IFs. I truly haven’t read very many, so all I can recommend to anybody are the 3 IFs that I have read which I each loved enormously: Infamous; College Tennis: Origin Story; and Apartment 502.

If you were to say one thing to your readers, other authors, and/or the interactive fiction community: what would it be?

I only got here in December, and so far everyone has been extremely welcoming and helpful. Honestly, I have no notes. All I can do is encourage everyone to give writing a chance. It’s been so fruitful and rewarding for me, so I strongly urge everyone to give it a shot if you’re considering it. Stop thinking, just do!

Any books, music, movies etc. you’re obsessed with at the moment, or which changed your life (or perspectives on something)?

I’m currently reading I’m With The Band by Pamela Des Barres as research for my IF, which has been a great insight into the mindset of groupies on an intimate level.

As for something that changed my life, I recently watched Sing Sing (2024)--which wasn’t something I did in relation to Scapegoated, I am just an avid film-watcher–and it was such an incredible de-stigmatising eye into the prison system. An extremely important watch for Black History Month, too!

This-or-that segment: (bold = Kiki's pick)

Coffee or tea?

Early mornings or late nights?

City or countryside?

Angsty or Cozy romances? (Or enemies-to-lovers or best-friends-to-lovers?)  

Steady progress or frenzied binge-writing followed by periods of calm?

Summer or Winter?

First drafts or editing?

Introvert or extrovert?

Plotter or pantser?

Characters or plot first?

Kiki’s custom “either-or” pairing: writing in silence or with music playing?

[raine-dance]

Tbh Red vs Blue didn't really intend to lean too far into the dissociative lens with Leonard Church as far as I can tell. He's an AI that's a reconstruction of a real person, through the use of brain-mapping technology. Church, the AI, became a system through... conventional traumatic means, and that's almost where they leave it in terms of direct reference to the disorder. But it's still interesting to look at things within that lens, and while I do eventually intend to collect my thoughts into a video essay, I think I'd like to share one train of thought here because I think it's legitimately interesting.

Everyone knows about the cliché of the murderous alter. Red vs Blue's most notable example is Sigma. Now I know that on this sentence alone, many would criticise me calling Church the best DID representation I've seen in media, especially given that they also misnomer the disorder as MPD, but I think Sigma is the most interesting example of the trope, because he actually has something to say about the treatment of those with dissociative disorders.

For one, I think that character context is important. Church (as in Alpha) was created to be a murder machine - the Director would force Church to split and extract the new split into its own AI unit, given to Freelancers with the express purpose of making them more effective soldiers. Almost everyone in the series is a killer, although some are more effective than others, and nowhere is this description more applicable than Project Freelancer.

With that in mind, the Freelancers were given seminars on the workings of AI - in the series, an AI fragment might try to "metastabilise," or reconnect with other fragments of the same AI, to achieve a sense of wholeness. If I recall, AI were supposed to remain inactive for these seminars, but Agent Maine was fond of Sigma due to Sigma's ability to act as a mouthpiece for him after an injury, and Sigma was made aware of the concept of "metastability." As such, he decided that he wanted to achieve metastability, and this decision kicks off the vast majority of RvB's plot.

There are many things getting in the way of Sigma's plan, however, and first and foremost is the fact that all of the other AI fragments have been allotted to other Freelancer agents. While there may have been a conflict of interest for Maine, Sigma had a clear goal in mind, and was ultimately conditioned to achieve it - the AI units were made to kill, and this is a large part of why he proceeds with his plan.

So, why am I mentioning this? I'm not just here to defend this writing decision, I said this plotline had something to say about the treatment of systems, and it does, either intentionally, or, more likely, not - first, it deals with how the world surrounding systems form how they react to the issues the world involves them in, something that is true of not only us, but of everyone. Second, it challenges the idea that final fusion is the healthiest and only acceptable treatment for systems.

The only reason Sigma strives for something analogous to final fusion is because he was told by someone who should be an expert that this is the only way forward for him. The only way to achieve, in direct quote, "humanity," a goal he had already been striving for. And the tragic thing is that he believed that this was the case when the viewer looking at the show through a dissociative lens already knows it isn't, both in real life, and in the series.

Church, as in the Alpha AI, and later Epsilon, is one of the most human characters in the show. He's a lot of things - a bit arrogant, very brash, and often pissed off, but he cares about his friends, and does everything in his power to help them succeed, even sacrificing himself as Epsilon for them. He was human once, and as an AI, is a reconstruction of that former humanity, and he still manages to retain it. As Epsilon, he achieves functional multiplicity until the plot forces him to go through final fusion to save his friends, and the act, in the timeline of Seasons 15-18, at least, literally kills him.

The treatment of systems matters so much to me. And despite starting out as a crass comedy show about the shittiest soldiers in the galaxy, with the relevant seasons having released 13 years ago, the series still manages to treat us with more respect and challenge more issues relating to how society treats us than most, if not all media that deems us interesting enough to be plot-relevant does now. I have a lot of thoughts about it all, and whenever I feel like it, I'll probably write more about it. Thanks for reading, if you did make it this far, I'm just rambling and all, but if this matters even half as much to someone else as it does to me, that makes me happy.

[sharklovingaquarist]

Hey! Well, to preface, I'll admit I myself am still an undergraduate (although I was in many biological science classes, still far from professional. I still believe I can ask questions because it is undeniable to me that science is based on a male perspective). I understand your gripe with the general, unprofessional nature of the word "conception." I myself use it because to me, the word "fertilize" seems like we are saying the sperm takes action against the egg. It makes it seem as if the egg is inviable or infertile until a sperm "penetrates" it. But eggs are more complex than sperm (if I remember correctly), so why isn't it that we word it as an egg fertilizing the sperm? I also made an inference based on the way people talk about reproduction outside of a scientific context. A mans sperm is sometimes called his "seed," but a seed is an embryonic plant, not a gamete. Another example would be the fact that eggs on their own are called "unfertilized." There's something off about the fact that there are "fertilized eggs," too. Maybe you could explain, but once sperm and egg unite, wouldn't it be considered a whole new thing (ex. zygote). To me, there doesn't seem to exist a vocabulary that depicts the action of sperm and egg uniting in a way that acknowledges female and male involvement, just male doing onto female. Again, this culture can be seen in how women are often treated as vessels for a fetus. I dont know if I made any sense there... I hope I did.

As for the actual mechanics, I very much thank you for your in-depth explanation! It was my mistake, I should have looked deeper into my claims as I only knew the general idea of gamete involvement in mate selection. I did look into the study you mentioned, very interesting!!! However, when I said that eggs chose sperm, I was alluding to the basic idea of eggs having a preference. I wasn't trying to be too specific because I didn't know all the details, but I should've elaborated 😬 but it still does prove my point. Eggs are (theorized) to be attracted to more compatible sperm from a certain mate. Even if it is not a choice between sperm from the same man, there is still interaction and choice on the female gamete. I guess my issue with the way we speak about reproduction is that it's almost worded in a way that portrays the egg as an inanimate house for a sperm.

I 100 percent also see your concern with this theory being misused. I think that comes down to people not understanding involuntary bodily functions and voluntary bodily functions. My concern is about the perception of the female body as a tool for males to use during procreation (I use that analogy a lot lmfao I'm a bit repetitive sometimes) not as a body that also puts in effort and has credibility during the process. Credibility other than "carrying a fetus."

As for this theory being correct, I'm unsure of its current status. However, looking at their findings, it's pretty convincing! I hope this can be the start of a more equitable science, to be honest. Maybe the female body is finally getting the credit it deserves, especially concerning our control and power in reproductive relationships. I mean, just from interacting with people in my area of study, they seem to forget about female mate selection ALL THE TIME. They insist that rape is a staple in nature, though from my observations its very inefficient! But that's a personal experience. Although I am still plenty ignorant on a lot of biological science, I do think my question has merit in some way. We do need to consider how males have vastly populated sciences. I mean, let's look at how little they even know about the female body. Just think of how much there's left to discover about our own bodies!

Thank you for your very respectful and educational addition. I understand where you are coming from with the religious part. To me, it just seems like "conception" acknowledges a team effort much better than fertilization (again, because it is worded as something a sperm bestows an egg. It appears, to me, that men have a bit of an obsession with controlling or defining a female body through their actions). Really, it may come down to our own personal opinions. Im a very unorthodox person with science, but I believe there is a place for questioning things within our studies. When I said, "My hands are tied academically," I was more talking about the fact that when I DO go to specialize in my selected fields, my unprofessional view will not be accepted.

Alright, sorry for yapping so much. I hope this cleared things up because it may or may not have 😛

Edit: And I would also love to include that the fact that so many sperm die before meeting the egg seems like a test in itself to weave out the weak ones and only include the best of the best haha 😈 sorry for any confusion I have caused or any misinformation I have spread. This was a great lesson in really diving into the things I say.

No @anomalys-bane you do have a point. I have many posts that concern the reproductive process and our wording of it. It always relies on the perception of a female vessel being done to by a male catalyst. You are the machine he operates. If men are feeling gracious, they'll say you're the goddess of life or whatever bullshit, but then word it as if they grant us permission to our "power to create life." I often talk about how I am going into zoological fields and how I am invested in animal hobbies (including breeding animals). The male ego is so vast, so prevalent, that a vocabulary does not exist to properly describe this process. I try my hardest, but academically, my hands are tied. I know later on I'll be corrected for not following the science made to make men feel more important than they are. More in control than they are. More credible and powerful. Fertilization, I try to replace with conception. We now know that eggs choose sperm, but that will never be integrated into our dialog as scientists. It's been a male field, it continues to be so. Women who enter don't question, I feel as if they actually enjoy this view of themselves bestowed to them by male overlords. As for "impregnation," I try to avoid seeing pregnancy as a direct action of a male and more as a process. Conception is male, "impregnation" is not. We become pregnant when an embryo attaches to our uterus, not when a sperm enters our uterus. Pregnancy is not an action done to by the male, it is a result of two people acting together. I refuse to see it as a man putting an embryo inside of me. He ejaculates inside of a woman so his sperm can meet her egg, not so he can impregnate her. The wording makes it seem as if she has no effort in the matter, when eggs are a more complex gamete than sperm is.

Basically, our view is heavily male centered. Most things are. It's miserable being in this field.

Edit: I feel as if I should provide an explanation for my take on female creation being the wrong way of viewing gestation. You have to see the process for how it is. People on the one side must stop acting as if female bodies are tools, and people on the other side must stop glorifying the female body in an inhuman, deified way. It is neither of the two radical ideas. Females do not create life through pregnancy. Females and males create life through conception (albeit NOT sentience, this is a process, after all. Sentience is achieved by an individual after birth). A bird chick forms away from a female in an egg. The truth of pregnancy is that it closely resembles parasitism. It's not a perfect definition because it can benefit females in the case of a healthy, stable-minded female spreading her genetics (impossible in our modern society imo). However, my point is that the fetus leeches nutrients from the female body. The female body is a nutrient source, not a machine that stitches together arms, legs, and a torso. The embryo is able to build parts to its body because of the nutrients it steals. The true power of female reproduction comes from our ability to withstand this. Endurance. But males are unable to eat their pride and admit this proves our capability, so then we become either vessels or artistic creators. We can not be strong in the same sense they are.

The female body should strive to be neutral. Not an inferior, not a deity. The fact is women have had their identities repressed for so long that we have no idea how to stay in the lines of humanity. I will say, though, that the women who glorify their female bodies are much MUCH better than those who see it as inferior. It is just a nitpick I have

[mint-ty]

Here's another funny one from Katarsis from Eurodiena yt interview. This was also filmed after LT Semi-finals.

<at 33:00 min, they were talking about how Katarsis wasn't even aware how many preparties there are in ESC and that it's not just 2 days on the main stage.>

Lukas, unprompted: Sorry, I just wanted to ask, is it real that Tommy Cash will be in Eurovision?

Interviewer: I'd say 99%, because he's participating in Estonian selection and has a song that is considered a total favorite. You're curious? :D

Lukas: Yeah I'm curious :)

Jokūbas: That song is also my favorite :D

Interviewer: You listen to it?

Jokūbas: Oh yeah I listen to it very often.

Interviewer: Espresso Macchiato :D Generally the reception of that song by fans is very broad, because some say that the song is making fun of Italy and Spain. How would you answer Jokūbas?

Jokūbas: I haven't really seen such talks, maybe it would be best to ask Tommy what he wants to provoke, of course he wants to provoke something - since it's him, but I don't think it's related to any cultural thing in particular.

Interviewer: Last year Silvester went to Eurovision and really wanted to meet Olly Alexander, and your highlight this year would be Tommy Cash yeah?

Lukas: Would be fun :D

Interviewer: Immediately the shipping would start :D I already can see the Internet buzzing about putting Katarsis and Tommy Cash in the same space. I think Tommy would actually like you! Seeing what he does and seeing what you do, would be really interesting, maybe even a joint interview! Well, that's talks for later.

Other fun bits from the interview:

The stage visuals are supposed to look like a dream and for their clothing they wanted something a bit cult-like.

They think Lithuania in the past years was best represented by Monika Liu, at least from the years when they watched Eurovision.

Katarsis songs are generally sadder, but Lukas doesn't see that as an issue "I write sad songs because I don't want to keep sad feelings, I want to keep happy feelings. There is so much different music, everyone can choose what they like the most and every type is important."

Interviewer: "You seem a bit introverted band, you're not worried how it will regarding big interviews and all?" Lukas: "Nah, they should be worried more :D"

Interviewer: "If you go to Basel, you'll have hundreds of same questions to answer." Jokūbas: "If they ask same questions, likely they already know the answer, so we can just play a game and answer as many wildly different things as we can each time to the same question, that might be fun :D"

They talked a lot about buckwheat dishes and what are the best ones (either just a buckwheat porridge with sour cream and salt, or buckwheat meatballs)

Interviewer tried to ask about sports and they said they are absolutely the wrong band to answer any of sports related questions, then they talked a bit about computer games.

Lukas doesn't know his shampoo brand, but not because it's 5in1, but because he got it from a hairdresser when he got his hair colored. It's in a black bottle or something.

[ancha-aus]

Bitty Surprise - Chapter 1 - Pov Cross

Hello! What is this? This is something I normally only do on my AO3. My normal uplaod day is Sunday over there and I try to upload a chapter of a completed series every Sunday.

The thing is. This one is a short one and I figured everyone here could also appreciate the bitties. So I am cross posting.

The link to the AO3 story is Here.

Enjoy the bitty madness :)

---

Summary:

With the truce in place Killer, Cross and Nightmare are free to travel around the multiverse. They never expected to come across some Bitties who proceeded to steal their souls. They hope they at least did the same in return.

*---------------------------*

Cross can honestly say he is happy with the truce.

And no Killer that has nothing to do with the fact that they now are included in the council meetings and that Dream has been talking to him again.

Cross can admit it is nice to be able to try and repair his friendship with Dream but the eye brow wiggles from Killer has to stop.

Seriously, they are skeletons how does he even do it?

Cross just loves the fact that they can now actually go to neutral universes for their shopping without having to worry that someone is going to act weird.

Well they still act weird but now they can’t refuse service as easily or raise the prices because the Stars will be mad at them.

At the moment Killer and him are doing some grocery shopping. They had found this new neutral universe and it is perfect!

The monsters were never locked underground. They are chill about skeletons. They hadn’t even met the ‘main cast’ just yet! It is a large enough universe and world that they just, hadn’t ran into their own alternative and honestly it is a nice change of pace. Cross is getting tired of always having to explain that ‘yes technically he is Sans’ and ‘No they aren’t the same person because environment and nurture affects how a person shapes,’ and ‘It is more like having the same name and coming from two different countries.’. Cross can’t even count all the times people in universes have gotten weird about their own universe version of him after meeting any of the universe travellers.

Either way he is getting off topic.

The shops are all up to date and modern and have a large amount of styles.

Hell! Even boss had been treated neutrally here!

Instead of the fear and distrusting glares shot his way, this universe had been kept completely out of the loop! Which means they just see Nightmare as just another monster. Hell at most someone asked Nightmare if he was part slime monster.

Cross had managed to keep it together but Killer had wheezed and fallen over laughing.

Cross is also unsure how Nightmare had managed to keep a straight face before giving a charming smile and telling them that he got that a lot, but that it was just an expression of magic which caused the form. The monsters who had asked had quickly apologised for being rude. Nightmare however had just continued to smile and reassured the other that it had been alright as they hadn’t meant it as rude or negative but from a place of interest and respect.

Cross sometimes wonders if the war could have been over quicker if Nightmare had used his charms instead of the intimidation strategy but he isn’t going to finish that thought.

Either way it means that Killer and Cross have been doing most of their shopping in this universe and they tended to go to the same city, mostly because they knew the way at this point and where to get the best deals.

The truce did mean they didn’t have as much… disposable income anymore. No longer going on raids cuts back a lot in your pocket money.

It isn’t as if they have issues, Nightmare is a great boss and doesn’t let them have issues like that. It just means that now they actually have to pay for everything they want and that makes them more aware of prices again.

And honestly it is worth it as Cross can just enjoy spending time with Killer and Nightmare both without someone attacking them. It gives Cross time to really enjoy the experience and their company-

A snort and Cross looks over before biting down hard to stop himself from laughing “Killer.”

Killer grins as he leans against a doorway of a random shop, a large pink feathery boa around his neck and even bigger and brighter orange sunglasses on his skull.

“Killer? You must be mistaken! I am the fabulous Killster!! The real diva of the land!”

Cross knows he is going to lose this fight, especially with some kids nearby giggling before rushing back to their parents.

Cross rolls his eye lights as he turns away and starts walking “I am leaving you! And I am not going to get those snacks you want! Or maybe I will just get the wrong ones on accident! You are soooooo picky about them!”

“Hey! You don’t mess with the Crunchables!”

Cross snorts as Killer joins his side again, sans boa and sunglasses. Hah, sans, Cross may actually get better at this punning thing.

Cross looks around and realises he walked into another street parallel to the one holding the store they had been going to. Oh well, the long way it is. It is sunny anyway and a nice day to enjoy it.

Killer catches up and huffs “You are no fun.”

Cross answers with a deadpan voice “Of course not. They don’t train humour in the army.”

Killer snorts “Explains why XGaster was such a tool.”

Cross laughs and nods. It used to hurt, thinking about his past world. But he has made peace with his loss. He has a new home now with Nightmare and Killer and he is happy.

He knows that the Stars invited him to live with them after the truce had been made but… Cross hadn’t wanted it. He had wanted to just remain with Killer and Nightmare. Cross had found a certain peace in the silent and isolated castle. A happiness with being near Nightmare and Killer.

Cross could still remember how so many had come to him. Asking him if he had been okay, if he was sure about this decision, if he was being threatened.

Funny.

How even with a truce in place and Nightmare keeping his word to the dot people still mistrusted him.

Cross remembers how he had asked Killer about it. Why everyone still looked at them in that way. While they hadn’t with Cross. Even with Cross having been the reason half the multiverse had gotten into a war and XGaster had gotten out. Killer had snorted and looked so amused as he explained “You look like a hero. You behave like people expect a hero to be. Of course you are forgiven.”

Cross hadn’t liked it at all. Because it had been Nightmare who had even figured out that Cross hadn’t been in full control of himself. Nightmare had been the one who managed to at first lock XGaster out, then later lock XChara away and later remove them completely. Making it so that Cross was truly free to be himself again.

Yet everyone acted as if it had been the Stars. All while Ink had had a direct hand in bringing XGaster back and giving him his overwrite power back.

So Cross now just ignored most people and much preferred his own home. Where people didn’t question how he felt or thought the whole time. Where he had his new family.

Killer nudges him “Hello~ Crossy boy~ time to wake up again~” and he stares at him with those dark sockets “You good…” he glances to the side and kicks a rock “Didn’t meant to… like… trigger stuff I guess.”

Cross snorts and bumps their shoulders together “Nah, just my own mind wandering.” He looks around for a distraction when he feels himself freeze.

Oh.

My.

God.

That is.

He grabs blindly and tugs hard. Killer makes a choking sound “Cross!”

Cross just keeps tugging ���Kills. Kills you need to see this. Kills. This day just became amazing.”

Killer grumbles but Cross feels him freeze under his hold ��Holy shit… is that a…”

“Bitty store.”

They share a look and rush over to the store.

Only to pause by the window.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god they are so tiny!” Killer jumps in place as he has both his hands on the window as he stares at the tiny monsters.

Cross can’t actually recognise these monsters. Normally the bitty stores seem to specialise in monster types and have all kinds of bitty versions of other multiverse goers.

This seem like… just bitties. Just really tiny cute little things. Cross feels his soul melt at the sight of a tiny tiny lion like monster yawning before rolling up. A tiny shirt and pants on and all kinds of plushies around it as the bitty hugs one of them close.

Cross’s skull is turned back around and Killer stares at him with the most serious look Cross has ever seen on his face “Cross. If I don’t go in there and hold at least one bitty I will fucking die.”

Cross blinks before remembering. Bitty universes tended to not allow anyone access and least of all them. Saying it is too much of a risk to have any bitty of either the Stars or the Crescents given out. At least the Stars weren’t allowed versions of them either.

But these… these didn’t look like versions he had seen before…

Cross grins widely “You wouldn’t be able to stop me from holding one.” And he ducks under Killer’s arms and enters the shop.

A pleasant little bell rings out as Cross lets his eyes go around the store. It is chaos and overfull and should be overwhelming but it is beautiful and Cross never wants to leave.

The walls are covered with shelves and even more shelves all filled with all types of colourful items, tools, tiny house expansions. All for bitties. There is a bookshelf by the cash register that holds books all about bitty care.

But most importantly. To the other side by the window, which is cracked open to let some fresh air in. Are the bitty containers.

“Oh shit.” And Killer rushes straight there and falls to his knees to be on eye level with some of the glass containers as he coos that the miniature monsters.

Cross rushes to his side and just stares in awe.

He is unsure how long they just stare until they hear someone laugh softly behind them.

“I take you never saw a bitty before?”

Cross turns around and sees a ram monster behind him. Cross feels slightly embarrassed as he looks back at Killer, who has yet to stop staring at the bitties, before he looks back “We… we euh… We know of them of course. We just never had the chance to… see them ourselves.”

The ram laughs as they look at Killer who has actual hearts in his sockets as he stares at two tiny bitties starting to interact.

The ram looks back at him and grins “If you want you two can hold some of them.”

That shakes Killer out of his staring as he looks up in awe at the ram “We can!? But I thought… They bonded quickly and stuff?”

The ram huffs “Only when not treated right.” they look apologetic “I am sorry. I just know that a lot of people keep those poor bitties isolated. Makes them more likely to quickly bond to a new owner. But that is cruel. The little guys are happiest and healthiest if they can interact with one another and form a bond or two with fellow bitties.”

Cross nods along “I never heard that before but it makes a lot of sense.”

Killer nods “Yeah! Cats have it too! Cats bond with fellow cats! Which is why it is advised to adopt two or a bonded pair when you adopt a cat. I assume the same counts for bitties?”

The ram smiles brightly “It does! Come! I will show you some of the older bitties, they are more likely to let you hold them in peace and won’t mind it too much.” The ram leads them away from the front and to a larger container, Cross glances down and spots about sixteen bitties.

Killer gasps as he stares “They are so small.”

The ram laughs “Yeah you never get used to it.” they open the container which causes a few of the bitties to look up. The ram smiles “Hey you guys. Any of you okay with letting some new visitors hold you for a bit?”

The bitties share looks before a goat bitty rises and easily walks over to the opening and holding their arms out. The ram lowers their hand and the bitty climbs up themselves.

The ram takes the bitty out and doesn’t even close the container behind them.

Killer has his hands in a cup and the bitty is carefully transferred. Killer just stares in awe and gently pets the bitty. Cross looks nervously at the container “euh… shouldn’t you like… close that?”

The ram hums and looks over his shoulder “Oh no it is fine. Bitties, once comfortable, don’t tend to run away or explore beyond the area they see as home. I mostly keep those closed and locked to make sure customers don’t just remove bitties from their areas without permission.”

Cross nods and feels Killer nudge him with his shoulder “Cross. Cross. You gotta try this man!”

Cross looks at the ram monster and they laugh as they ask for another bitty to volunteer which another bitty answers, a dog monster bitty this time. One transfer later and Cross has an adorable tiny dog monster in his hands. Staring up at him and wagging the tiniest little tail when Cross pets him.

Eventually both bitties seem to have had enough and start to fuss, which the shop keeper sees and they quickly take the two bitties back and put them with the others. In the container one little cat like bitty runs to the goat to check them while three other dog bitties rush the returned dog bitty.

The shop keeper grins “See? Bonded pairs and groups. They are adorable when they snuggle together and sleep.” And they point to one pile of three bitties all sleeping peacefully together in the afternoon sun.

Cross can’t help but coo at the sight. Killer turns to the shopkeeper with a begging look “Can we… hold more?”

The ram laughs but nods as they keep retrieving bitties for them to hold. Cross thinks his favourite is a little cat one who had been nuzzling the tips of his phalanges, even when he got scratched by the little guy.

They spend their whole afternoon in that little shop. Talking to, holding and snuggling tiny bitties. Some are friendlier than others and Cross still isn’t sure just who his favourite is. Maybe the shy little guy that kept hiding his face. Or the sweet bitty who would hug his finger. Or the bitty that bit his phalange as soon as Cross tried to pet them. Oh Cross just can’t decide.

“Oh… my… god!”

Cross blinks away from the tiny sleeping bitty in his hands as he searches for Killer, only to see Killer disappear behind a shelf near the windows.

“Oh are you kidding me! This is the cutest ever! Hey! Sir! Can I please hold this skeleton bitty?”

Oh. My. God.

Cross very carefully returns the bitty he was holding to the right container before running towards where he saw Killer disappear. The moment he gets to Killer he saw what has the other enchanted.

Perfectly at eye level for them. Right by the window near the cracked open side. Is a container with a lone skeleton bitty inside.

The bitty is bigger than the bitties they had seen until now but that mattered very little because it was still a bitty and still not even as big than their own hands.

The little thing is munching on some pieces of fruit and seems completely uninterested in the noise they are making or the fact that Killer is pretty much plastered against the side of their cage. The little thing just munches on their fruit as they look out of the window.

Cross can’t help but notice the caved in skull and how one socket is completely black while the other socket is red with a tiny spot of black. The bitty is wearing this large, for them, jacket with a fluffy hood and some shorts.

The shopkeeper catches up to them and Cross hears them pant “Please no running in the store!”

Killer only turns a tiny bit, his own empty sockets not looking away from the bitty “Can I please hold this one? Oh they are just adorable!”

The ram monster frowns before seeing where Killer is looking and they look apologetic “Oh… euh… I am sorry but no… that little guy isn’t really for holding or anything… Not even really up for adoption for that matter.”

Cross frowns before once again noticing that the little guy is all alone… No other bitties with them. “Where is their bonded bitty?”

The ram sighs as they looks sheepish “Well, the little guy is bonded! It is just… Bitey is… bitey… and he can’t be with other bitties… Mostly because he tends to steal the food from the other bitties and stockpile it.” The ram walks over with some food and very carefully unlocks the actual little gate.

As soon as the lock unlocks the bitty turns around and the large red socket stares at the ram. Cross can see the bitty study both Cross and Killer before dismissing them and staring at the one holding the food.

The ram very slowly moves a hand closer and into the container.

The bitty glares and starts to show their fangs and a low growl starts to leave the tiny thing.

The ram speaks softly “It is okay. I know you are stressed. I am just giving you some food. I won’t take anything from you.” the ram slowly fills the food dish before the hand leaves the cage and the cage is relocked.

The bitty continues to stare at the gate for a bit before slowly rising from its spot and taking a few steps closer. He looks up to check the gate and ends up grabbing the filled dish and pulling it over with him. Back to the spot he had been sitting at. The one closest to the window.

Killer just coos loudly as he stares at the bitty. And Cross gets it. It is so fucking cute.

The ram sighs.

Cross turns to the ram and frowns “So… where is their bonded bitty? Wouldn’t the little guy feel relaxed and happy if his bonded or bondeds are near?”

The ram sighs again as they rub their face “We know! The problem is… we don’t… actually have the other bitty that he bonded with?” They wave at the open window “There is a bitty somewhere here in town… just going around in the alleyways… we don’t know who they are or how they are, they were not originally from this store to begin with!” they sigh and look sadly at the skeleton bitty “We would… like to let this little guy go to reunite with his buddy but… well… the skull, as you no doubt know better than anyone… it needs constant treatment…” they sigh sadly.

Killer frowns “Why not catch the other little guy?”

The ram chuckles “Oh we tried. We tried everything but the little guy is smart and slippery and… well… the last time we tried to catch him he made a run for it and we didn’t see him for five weeks.”

Cross feels himself freeze. Five weeks? From what he understood not being near their bonded for a few days was already rough for the bitties…

The shopkeeper sighs “This little guy was beside himself. Whining and staring out of the window. Trying to escape multiple times. Not even eating his own food and just stockpiling it all. We were so worried. When the other guy came by for a visit again we just… we decided it was for the better to just leave them an easy way to interact.” And they wave at the open window.

Killer frowns “What about cats? I thought cats hunt bitties?”

Cross feels his soul speed up with panic. There is a tiny bitty all alone outside and there are cats and what if those cats get the little guy and-

The ram holds up their hands “No! Well… yeah… But we have yet to see a cat try to get in but we have security cameras. Bitey’s friend tends to only come when there is no one in the shop at night.” they nod towards the cage where the little bitty has been sorting the food and between moving it he keeps looking up at the window, as if waiting.

Waiting for his equally tiny friend.

The ram smiles as they point back to the other bitties “Either way, this bitty isn’t for sale or adoptable. Want to look at the other bitties again? There are many more in all shapes and forms!”

Killer looks back at the tiny skeleton “Fine I guess…” he stares for a moment longer before going back to the other bitties.

They spend a while longer holding the other bitties in the store. But Cross knows his soul isn’t in it. He can’t help but keep thinking about a tiny bitty outside. All alone and having to take care of himself. About the tiny bitty who is alone in a cage, hoping for his one friend and family to come back for him, while all the other bitties dislike him. Cross is reminded of the empty space he had been, all alone. He is reminded of Killer who had been in his own dead AU for a long time. About Nightmare, who no one seemed willing to try and understand or even bother to talk to, to try and understand why he did what he had to.

Killer and him end up leaving the store in silence as they continue their track to the grocery store. They are lucky it is still open and they quickly grab the things they need. Neither of them say anything as they collect the things they need and pay.

They don’t bother to explore the streets anymore after getting the stuff they needed and Cross uses his, well it used to be XChara’s but now it is his, knife to cut a doorway for them.

They step through and Cross feels himself relax.

Home sweet home.

Hah!

Strange how before it was just a place of work but now it is his home.

Killer had called it Nightmare’s hideout once. But Cross likes to think it is more than just that now. It is their hideout, their home. A place where the multiverse can’t get to them and they can just be. A place perfectly safe with nothing that can hurt them anywhere near.

Honestly it would be the perfect place to have two tiny bitties run around, nothing would hurt them as they explore-

Cross shakes his skull and goes straight to the kitchen after entering the castle. He opens the bag and starts putting things away. Killer looks into the bags and takes out some frozen pizzas which he puts in the oven.

They are quiet as they clean up and wait for the timer to run out.

“You two are oddly quiet.”

Cross looks up as Killer grins “Sup boss!”

Nightmare rolls his eyes as he looks unimpressed “Not much of a boss anymore. Why do both of you feel disheartened? I thought you two were going to one of the universes that we had already called clean?” he frowns.

Cross feels touched by the worry as he shrugs “We did! We went to the usual place.”

Nightmare’s frown doesn’t disappear “That doesn’t explain your emotions.” he looks between the two of them.

Killer huffs as he leans on the counter with crossed arms “We were just walking through town and- Wait! Nightmare!” Killer stands upright with a large grin “They have a bitty shop in that universe!”

Nightmare blinks and looks surprised “But it is a neutral universe…”

That is when Cross remembers. Cross himself and Killer may have had the chance to see bitties once or twice from a distance… but Nightmare wouldn’t have had the chance, ever. As Nightmare at first hadn’t been able to enter positive universes and later it was just too much of a risk as he would be weaker and the Stars stronger.

Killer seems to have thought of the same conclusion as he grins widely “Mare you need to come with us next time! There were so many bitties! They were all so cute and were so well behaved but not afraid or anything and it was all clean and well taken care of!” and Killer starts explaining with wide gestures what they saw and how they held some bitties.

Cross keeps an eye on the oven and by the time Killer winds down talking the pizzas are ready for them. They all get their own and get comfortable at the table to eat their dinner.

Killer grins widely “Oh and Nightmare! They had a skeleton bitty! Not any other multiverse goer or anything! The little guy was straight up just his own person! He was cute and was just hoarding food and such a big little guy!”

Nightmare chuckles as he eats a piece “If this whole conversation is just a windup to ask if you can adopt a bitty you could have started with that.” He eats another bite.

Killer’s grin falls and he sighs “Not like it is possible… little guy isn’t up for adoption.”

Nightmare frowns “Why not?”

Killer just stares sadly at his plate and Cross speaks up “Well, bitties bond to other bitties for like stability and mental health and stuff. Well the little skeleton guy does have a bitty he is bonded to, but that bitty isn’t actually in the shop but a wild bitty.”

Nightmare stops and frowns at them “I thought bitties couldn’t live in the wild?”

Killer pouts as he lays on the table on crossed arms “They normally can’t… guess it is just a very crafty bitty.”

Cross thinks “I think there are some AUs where they can but that are the special cases. In general they can’t…” he sighs as he pushes at his pizza “We are just worried about the two little guys…”

Nightmare looks at them thoughtfully before nodding “I see. And while adopting isn’t possible you could always visit him and sponsor him.” and he eats.

Killer shoots up and stares in shock “What?”

Nightmare pauses as he looks unimpressed “You can visit the bitty still. Not to forget you may be able to make a deal with the shop that you at least adopt him in name. That way you can still spoil him but the shopkeeper will be able to make sure everything is still fine. In some places it is called sponsoring.”

Cross blinks confused “That is a thing?”

Nightmare nods “It is often done with endangered species, at least in quite a few universes. It makes the people feel more involved and attached to them. Maybe you can make a deal with the store and work something out?” and he turns back to his pizza.

Killer jumps up “Yes! We can totally do that! Oh! And tomorrow we can show you where the store is! That was you can also see the bitty!”

Nightmare chuckles “It is fine Killer.”

Killer pouts “Come on boss, it will be fun!”

Nightmare sighs as he shoots Killer a look “I thought we already agreed I am not technically your boss anymore. At most I am your landlord.”

Cross snorts “Being a landlord implies we are paying you, which we aren’t.”

Killer nods “In matter of fact you still pay us.”

Nightmare sighs but Cross can spot a small smile on the other’s face.

Cross smiles as he turns to his own food and finally eats dinner.

--

"… Hey."

“Bunny.”

“Who were that?”

“… Don’t know. Left quickly.”

“Okay… stay safe?”

“I am fine bunny.”

“I love you.”

“Love you too.”

[pynkhues]

I keep seeing posts about Louis being a very incurious person/vampire and I wanted to know if you agreed on that but more so where that comes from? Is it a that’s none of my business thing or a I really don’t care thing. Maybe it’s something else entirely. I feel like there’s a touch of Gabrielle in that… am I reaching?

Oh, I really disagree that Gabrielle's incurious, anon. I think she's one of the most curious vampires in the series, and if anything, I'd say that I personally feel the show's made Claudia a more curious vampire and a natural explorer to parallel her to Gabrielle, not Louis.

As for Louis being incurious - - I've seen a lot of those posts too (some of them are really funny!), and I think they're kind of true, but also not really? I think Louis' incredibly intelligent, and I think he actually has a pretty insatiable curiosity in certain respects. He reads a lot, and he reads broadly - from Charles Darwin to Edward Carpenter to Gustave Flaubert, Colette to - as eagle eyed fans noticed in the BTS shots - Simone de Beauvoir, and has obviously a specific interest in art, and I don't think you read that widely or engage with art that deeply if you're not a fundamentally curious person.

I think from a fandom standpoint that the theory comes from Louis never sharing Claudia's hunger to know about the vampire world, and his resistance to learning more about them in Europe, as well as Louis seeming to not have asked Lestat all that much (which I actually disagree with - he clearly asks Lestat a lot of questions throughout 1.02, and both scenes where Claudia asks Lestat who turned him I think imply that Louis had asked and been similarly shut down before) - but I don't know if I'd necessarily describe that as a lack of curiosity so much as a symptom of Louis' initial denial of his vampirism, and then his rejection of vampire society.

Louis doesn't see himself in other vampires. He denies his vampiric needs in Rue Royale, pretty clearly has an issue with the fact that Claudia takes after Lestat when it comes to both her efficacy as a hunter, and her embrace of her vampirism. He certainly doesn't identify with the 'Catfish-with-Teeth' that they find in Romania, and he pretty much hates the Coven, from the work they do, to the way they hunt, to the individuals within it. I think he feels detached / alienated from vampire society, and by the end of s2, I think he likes it that way. I talked about it a bit in my Byronic Hero post, but it's very common with this sort of character archetype to live either in exile, or in a self-exile, and Louis' both - he's cut out from the human society he wants to be a part of in New Orleans, and he chooses to remove himself from vampiric society in Paris.

And to me, that's what sits at the root of Louis' curiosity.

I think that he has an enormous amount of curiosity around the human society that cut him out - again, he's reading Darwin, Carpenter, de Beauvoir, he enjoys the human opera with Lestat, is following people around Paris trying to photograph them, engaging deeply with human art, taking fascinating human boys to fuck and eat in San Francisco - and a fundamental lack of curiosity in vampire society - he never really follows up with Lestat about vampires, is disinterested in Claudia's research, tries to pull the pin on their trip, doesn't want to engage with the Coven, hates the vampiric theatre, hates his own photographs of the vampires, finds Armand boring! The world's softest, beigest pillow!

Louis' fascinated by humanity and bored by vampires, and I do think that's partially a reflection of how Louis' internalised his' feelings about being rejected by one, and rejecting the other, just like I think his capitalist climb has been about gaining social power in a society that tried to disempower him. So yeah! I think he's curious, he just doesn't care about vampires, haha.

[my-jokes-are-my-armour]

So here I am again with my gray review/analysis of The Sirens of the Deep. As always, I don't give netflix adaptations of the witcher all the praises, but I can't go without explanations either. I won't put empty critics to light up the fires of already convinced people that this is just crap. Maybe I am a hopeless soul but this is how it works for me 🤷🏽‍♀️.

So here is my short review first and the whole detailed thing under the cut as always.

I enjoyed it more than I thought I would because I rapidly switched my mindset, leaving the straight adaptation behind and embrassing more of the Geralt and Jaskier on an adventure vibe.

So yeah this movie doesn't have the emotional impact of the short story, especially because of the way it ends in A little Sacrifice and because the movie focused on other things than the romance, but for me, it fills some places that needed substance in S1 and gives another layer to Geralt's feelings that was lacking in the main. It also gives me some things to think about Jaskier in a way I didn't anticipate from the series perspective.

So if I take it simply as a rendition of A Little Sacrifice, it is not satisfying as such. But inside S1, it works well and it really pleased me.

Now for some quick sharp critics : Jaskier's songs are far too short. I need Joey Batey's voice in IV 😩. The animation is ok, but I don't like some aspects of low frame rate animations. The movie has inconsistencies in some aspects, and, weirdly, has some noticeable visual continuity issues. It changes a lot of characters and some dynamics which can feel weird, with the book story in head.

But. It explores a part that was only suggested in the og, giving the merpeople a visibility and a place in the story. So the POV about the conflict is not one sided. Merpeople and humans share their part of responsibility, keeping the tradition of grey stories.

Yennefer is barely here but her presence gives a part of what was missing in the series to really feel and understand Geralt's love for her in S1.

The story has changed quite a lot for Essi and Jaskier but it gives some interesting things to think about, if you place it in relation to the main series and not the book. Then - and this is more like in the book here - things reflects on Geralt with a mirroring effect, which I found well done overall.

And the most satisfying thing for me was basically Geralt and Jaskier together, giving something in between to book and the series. The geraskier being actual bros is present in a lot of little things, but didn't play it as intimate as in the book - maybe they were too afraid to slide on a weird angle 😅 - but man at the end 😳, I took a geraskier shower by proxy and I was not ready for that 🤣.

That said. I will give Sirens of the Deep a 7.5/10. It is a good filler to the series and I had a good time. For a pure adaptation of the book point of view, I will give more of a 6/10 as it deviates a lot and misses the emotional part.

Now, I will detail everything and spoil a lot, under the cut. You've been warned.

First thing first.

Everyone is entitled to appreciate a product or not, to have some knowledge of the source material or not, to prefer the games to the books to the series etc. I have read mild to bad receptions to the movie with valid rejections. I have no problem with that.

As always, that's the blind and simply hateful comments I am against. I read things like they dumbed down every female characters so Yennefer would be superior or the opposite classical like Geralt isn't even in the center of this feminist horrible product. I read things like this is stupid that the story was mixed with A Little Mermaid. Or they didn't read the story. They didn't respect the source material and then say the fights were the best part.

To be fair, for Sirens of the Deep, that last statement can be very true considering the angle with which they approached the story ! (You didn't anticipate me saying that right lool). But if you think they didn't respect the source material I wonder how the fights were the best to you 😅.

Anyway, yes they did read and there is still a lot from the story in it. The problem is that this story is attached to strong emotional elements to which most of us have responded reading it. And memory is selective. We kept mostly that and not the rest.

So when the adaptation picks a lot more of the other things, changes what was not very nice, and build something over the little pieces we don't remember that instead of giving us what we hoped, there is deception at the end of the road.

What I want to do here is to be a little bit more objective. Because I did enjoy the movie, but I realise that this is just because my mind switched perspective very early on while I was watching.

Let's begin with the obvious.

Adaptation of an adaptation :

In my opinion : Is this movie the perfect adaptation of A Little Sacrifice ? Hell no. That story broke my heart so bad and I can't forget that. We are not near that with this adaptation. But if you consider it taking place in S1 and having for setup that story, it has its qualities. So of course liberties have been taken. Of course it doesn't reflect all that made A little Sacrifice so good. But at the same time it goes in interesting places and adds some layers that were lacking on Geralt from the series. And that is what I enjoyed a lot.

I have some issues with the critic about the injection of A Little Mermaid in the story, because : A Little Sacrifice IS already an adaptation of The Little Mermaid tale.

It also has elements of the Ys legend attached to it.

This is a melting pot made into a total new story to satisfy the growth of Geralt's character concerning his feelings.

So can we really be mad that the adaptation of the adaptation takes the same references and reinjected them in their own way ? We can but I am not.

As a reminder, The Little Mermaid is a Danish fairy tale and Ys is a french one based on celtic myths. Those two stories have many adaptations through the centuries. And every one of them takes what they want from it and uses the myths like they want. This is for the 100% slavik ref argument...

I am pretty sure everyone that read the short story can make the link with The Little Mermaid. I mean. There is a mermaid. There is a love story. She ends up with legs. But did you remember things about Ys ?

Here is one ref to Ys from the book : “Because they are steps,” Dandelion whispered in awe. “Ooo, they’re steps leading to an underwater city. To the legendary Ys, which was swallowed up by the sea. Have you heard the legend of the city of the chasm, about Ys-Beneath-The-Waves? I shall write such a ballad the competition won’t know what’s hit them. I have to see it up close… Look, there’s some kind of mosaic, something is engraved or carved there… Some kind of writing? Move away, Geralt.”

And here is a direct ref from the movie : The sirens Queen's name is Dahut, who is the main character around this legend. And the place of the royal mermaids in the movie is like a sunken city.

For me, the movie created the merpeople civilisation based on several references like the first one I gave. The short story doesn't show much of the merpeople, except Sh’eenaz and some fishmen. But they clearly took things from the dialogues mostly. Geralt and Jaskier exploring and talking about those creatures and their possible civilisation. They took also from The Little Mermaid, the Disney version, but a slightly more darker tone but not enough. I understand that THIS can feel bad.

But then, I invite you to revisit the Andersen tale. Sure Disney is all sugar and ice caking compare to the og 😅, but, look at the A Little Sacrifice's version and see that it is also not as dark as the original for the part it takes of : the mermaid and the Duke actually love each other and there is a "happy" ending to that part of the story. But you will see also how drastically different this adaptation is from the two others. Because well... Adaptations, especially from old tales, are rarely the replica of the original. Because it depends a lot on the narrator.

Then ask yourself what one wants to tell when they adapt a story ? What are the thematics explored ? Where and when does it fit ? What is the focus and the purpose ?

For me, here, the focus was to make it blend into the series universe, while adapting the mermaid part in a nicer way. Because let's be honest. Buying the fact that Sh’eenaz is actually loving Agloval so she accepts the sacrifice is quite a stretch of imagination lol. To me, the Duke feels more like a zoophile in the end ^^'.

Smoothing Agloval :

This is one of the change that I liked the most in the movie. Because they didn't make him perfect. He is genuine about his feeling but he is selfish too. The og duke is more deported on his father in an actually good way.

Just for a reminder. This is Agloval. “An intelligent race,” Agloval repeated pensively, resting an elbow on the armrest, and his fist on his chin. “An underwater civilisation. Fishlike people living on the seabed. Steps leading to the depths. Geralt, you take me for a bloody gullible duke.” Zelest proposal to kill all the creatures [...]"From what the Witcher says, they are some kind of sea drowners or other sea monsters. There are ways of dealing with drowners. I heard tell that one sorcerer gave some drowners short shrift in Lake Mokva. He poured a small barrel of magical philtre into the water and did for the fuckers. Didn’t leave a trace.’’[...] And Agloval's response to that "Thank you for that excellent suggestion, Zelest. Do you have any more?" And later... "You are mistaken, Miss Daven,” Agloval said calmly. ‘We shall learn whither lead those steps. Further, we shall descend those steps. We shall find out what is on that side of the ocean, if there is anything there at all. And we shall draw from the ocean everything we can. And if not we, then our grandsons will do it, or our grandsons’ grandsons. It is just a matter of time.[...]”

And just after that, when Agloval promises to exploit the sea till nothing is left, Sh’eenaz appears and she has made the sacrifice to bring peace and consume her relation with the Duke.

To him, the "love of his life" isn't even from an intelligent race, and he promised to go where he should not, destroy their habitat for profit because he is upset. (All similarity with anything is unintentional of course 🙄)

In the movie, they moved the centre of the dark part on something else. There is some racist undertone but less present. The merpeople and the humans know each others well and have a status quo situation going on. The start of the conflict for the merpeople is that the humans takes too much from the sea, just for the pearls economy. So the status quo is in balance because they are beginning to starve. So there is the greedy aspect of course from the humans, but the catalyser of the conflict is because the King don't accept the romance between his son and Sh'eenaz. He wants the succession of his lineage assured and this romance goes against it.

He goes great length to break that union, even making an alliance with Melusina who has her own motives to break to merpeople royal family.

The obstacles that Agloval and Sh'eenaz have to overcome makes their relationship truer.

One major change is that the movie reversed the sacrifice. Agloval proves his love and counters his father's actions against the merpeople, becoming the link between the land and sea, changing into a mermaid. The peace is very fragile but the love part is somehow more coherent.

The real problem maybe is that all of that takes almost all the light from the love story that was in the centre of A Little Sacrifice : Geralt and Essi. But I feel that a part of what was only about that in conversations, inner dialogs etc has been used in mirroring narrations.

"Just because you and your accursed lover only have two modes doesn't mean everyone else does"

Essi isn't the only mirror for Geralt's feelings toward Yennefer in this movie. I don't feel this is a bad thing on a strict narration point of view, but from an adaptation eye with this being one of the focal point of people love for the short story, this is a bad faux pas, because it made this part feel more generic.

So here are my analysis of the mirroring things.

They chose to illustrate several iteration of love stories. Each one reflecting on others and mostly Geralt's situation with Yennefer in the end. This is highlight several little things from the main series, like blood family vs chosen/found family and heritage. It also gives something back in between episode 5 and 6 of the main series : how Geralt feels about love in regard of his own situation.

The king and his two "loves"

Agloval is the legitimate heir of the King who tells him that he loved his mother from true love. Zelest is the illegitimate son but he has strangely a strong position in the court. Usually "bastard" are hidden if not killed. We can suppose that he lied, because he lies on a lot of things just to get what he wants.

He tries to convince his son that true love is not enough. And in the end even tell Zelest that he is an error he always wanted to erase.

The King put the interest before the sentiments, and even before the life of his own people. He doesn't care if people dies if he can stop the union of his son with the mermaid.

Melusina and the injustice

The relation of the King of Bremervoord with love is reflected on Melusina with whom he plots. And the sea witch is similar to Yennefer in several aspect. Even Jaskier is jokingly comparing them.

She is powerful, quite angry. She is sterile. Her colour is violet. 😏

She lost her true love against the need of the royal family to have an heir. Things are not really sure about the real love of the mer-king. He seems quite embarrassed. But Melusina wants her true love back even if she has to kill every one for that.

S1 Yennefer is in this kind of destructive path to get what she wants. She doesn't care much if she hurts people in her quest. Even Geralt. They share the passion and the she goes.

Agloval and Sh’eenaz

They have a major issue on communication (well that's no well played with the issues with the use of the merspeak). They are ok when there is only sex between them. But the manipulation of the people they trust renforce the problem to a breakup. In the end this is the action that proves the sincerity of the feelings.

And this reflects on Geralt love relations. He has a hard time communicate with those he loves in general. He doesn't understand why Yennefer keeps abandoning him. There is sex and passion but the rest is silent. And we have Jaskier that hates the sorceress and tries to force him out of this relation because he thinks she is not made for him. I think I have never seen Jaskier slaging off Yennefer as much than in this movie lool

And then when the spark appears between Geralt and Essi, he tries to push for that relation to blossom. The communication in the end is what resolve everything for them.

Which leads to.

Geralt's feelings and Essi

in the books, Geralt's struggles with his place in the world and his feelings are the biggest underlying subject in the short stories.

Geralt has a complexe toward his capacity to feel emotions and be entitled to love or being loved. He thinks of himself as a monster and not deserving those things. And we have a Jaskier in counter telling him he should not depreciate himself and go for it.

Here the approach to those things feels less miserable but he always tries to justify that he is different and not worth it. He acknowledge he has feelings though. His main excuse is : I am a witcher. Aka a killing machine making money hunting monsters and I never knew love in my life.

He has an intense relation with Yennefer but full of turmoils. He doesn't feel enough for her (a shard of ice) and in the series there the accent is more on understanding her and her needs.

When he meets Essi and have this love at first sight experience, he is troubled. Geralt is not feeling good enough to match the complexity of her feelings. And the whole discovery of her personality, the differences in the feelings he experiences for her and Yennefer, leads to touching moments, even emotional ones. We have some good conversations with Jaskier also.

But there is a little something that might have slide off you mind... 🚩

Description of Essi The woman could not have been older than eighteen, and was very slim. Her long, luxuriant hair was the colour of dark gold. They entered as the girl finished the song and thanked the audience for the thunderous applause with a nod of her head, which shook her hair gently.

Yes. Even if this looks like less than 18 but maybe isn't, Essi is way younger than Geralt and there is the possibility that she is not even an full adult. So yeah, there is a innocence and a freshness in her that makes the romance special. But in reality this is kind of creepy. Especially when we have Jaskier being pissed of by their mannerisms and the way they turn around each other without going anywhere who suggests that they fuck to settle it for good.

So...

They decided to age Essi. She is now a mature woman, around the age of Jaskier (as they know each other since childhood in the new headcanon). So she is something like 35/40, placing the story just before The Moutain.

And I say yes ! Thank you ! This is a nice change ! Geralt isn't fucking a teenager. Jaskier isn't pushing for his friend to have sex with a teenager either !

And Essi still got a softness to her, some strong temper too. She is still romantic. She is still infatuated with Geralt.

And those who claim that she is like the women Marie Sues all power that need no men ever, this is not true. Essi is stronger than Jaskier as a child, she is self assured, but Geralt is still her hero here. He saves her life twice. Same thing with Sh’eenaz. She needs others help. This is not because a woman can be brave that she is a Marie Sue or that she eclipses men's valor.

Like in the short story, this love story doesn't work. The reasons are not exactly the same though. Here, Geralt's life and heart are too hard for her and she wants a more normal life : have a family, peace and security.

Note that in S2, this is basically the dream of Yennefer too. Parallels. Parallels...

And note again that Essi tells to Geralt that Jaskier will do what she cannot ! The subtext sent me howling in geraskier there loool.

I was satisfied with their relationship even if we didn't have all the subtleties of Geralt's struggles. But we had more than we had in S1.

What we don't have is the strong emotional connection and the punch in the guts that is the real ending. I don't feel like this was necessary in this movie, it would probably have fallen flat in the circumstances. But I wish that somehow this tragedy is adressed in a way or another. Whump the bard lool.

Geralt and Jaskier

This was the most rewarding thing of the whole show for me. Just having Geralt actually caring for Jaskier and showing it was everything. Just the two of them being buddies, I could have that forever.

Jaskier is a little bit too buffoon because he is used 90% as the comic relief, but he lands right in the middle in his charactisation between the books and the series.

The geraskier subtext is running wild in my mind. Geralt is like "you annoying little shit" but then his reaction to Zelest is so "you touch him I kill you". Jaskier seems less infatuated but then you have some parallels with Essi's feelings that are just too straight : "your bard loves you and he is the one you need".

I won't say much more here or I will just enumerate very frame they share on screen because I loved them together being friends !!

The big character changes and other additions

i have already mentioned a lot of changes so i won't repeat too much here. This is more so comments I aant to make on the changes from the short story.

Agloval, Jaskier and Essi are those who have changed the most from the og and new connections have been made to change the dynamics with other secondary characters that have been changed also or added. I understand this could feel odd with the short story in head.

I spoke already a lot about Agloval and the vhanges around him, but i want to point another change that is linked to him and Jaskier now.

Zelest.

He was the supervisor of the pearl fishing. Here he is the king's illegitimate son, military counsellor and Jaskier's bully from the past. He's got a bit of a Faramir in some aspects here, searching for the approval of his father. He is also trying to be a better son than the legitimate one. He has a need to belong. He was channeling his of antipathic and violent persona for a while and I like the nuances it added to some characters.

Zelest leads to Jaskier and his new headcanon - which is strangely plausible, in the series verse and for some part compatible with the book character. Not for everything but still. So I was : ok I am listening here.

He leads also to a little bit of bi Jaskier. I mean you can't convince me that if he wasn't killed by the Kraken they wouldn't have made up in the end loool.

But his change of heart doesn't feel right. It just had drama to the situation of the kingdom in the end as the kind lost his two sons. But there are not much of an emotional impact.

Melusina and Sh’eenaz

Melusina is clearly a disney character here. She is half Ursula and Scar and she even has a muscial number like in the Disney adaptation (which is both weird and nice). Weird because this isn't the kind of things you can think of in a witcher rendition. The music isn't used as a number, it has a reality in the world. But honestly I like the song lol. So I put that in my little category of, I keep that to the side.

Her character as the grand villain why not. But the use of the kraken is both wrong to the short story and feels to much like Disney. Basically it is mentioned in the story but this isn't what caused the deaths of the fisher in their conclusion.

“And the monster that killed the pearl divers? You have no idea what it was?” “A kraken, perhaps?” “No. A kraken would have wrecked the boat, but it was intact. And, as they said, totally full of blood,” Little Eye swallowed and visibly paled. “Don’t think I’m being a know-all. I grew up by the sea, and I’ve seen a few things.”

Sh’eenaz has a lot more characteristics that in the book. She is can use magic apparently and her mother too. Well considering auty Melusina is a witch, why not. This this for me participates more to the massive fight at the end than to a real improvement of the character. I appreciated that we learn a bit about the merpeople through her though.

The political and economical situation :

They developed that part beyond the witcher story, giving the merpeople an existence. What differs the most here is that the humans are well aware of the existence of a sea civilization and that there are already some links between them with a status quo that is falling apart.

In the original story we just understand that the pearl divers are going too far and perturbs the merpeople. And Agloval is willing to destroy the environment out of anger and greed. Sh’eenaz makes the sacrifice that stabilises the situation but we don't have much of what is happening under the sea. So with all the addition in the movie, we have a grayer plot. Sure we have the real monsters are the humans. But here we also have a monster monster. And both monsters plotted together. Which is an interesting twist.

Merspeak :

One thing that was not well handled in the relation between the merpeople and land people was the merspeak. This is one of the least coherent things of the whole story.

In the book, Agloval needs Geralt and Geralt is helped by Essi at some to communicate with Sh’eenaz. And Sh’eenaz doesn't seem to understand common human language too. Everything is handled in English (or whatever language you read the story in). But here they actually created the language. The ideas are not bad but this is delivered very badly.

It falls apart in several moments.

First, as the sea and the land have a status quo, it is implied that both species communicate. We have a Vodnik speaking common language with Geralt and we have Agloval and Sh’eenaz arguing in their own language but apparently understanding each other. So yeah, nothing is coherent there and it is a big miss.

The war :

This is the part of the story that isn't featured at all in the book. This is a menace. But here they went full on it. This is one of the aspects that I wasn't really on board with. It has some cool elements but here if you want weird deviations on the source material, there are plenty.

First and this is not the worst to me because they didn't go too far with it and it was fun : Jaskier with a sword. This makes no sense and even he says basically wtf am I supposed to do ? But he mostly blocks the attacks and lets someone else kill the monsters. So ok, why not. Let the bard have some moments of fun.

One canon thing though: Jaskier headbutt 😅.

Now my main problem with the fights concerns Geralt.

I have switched off my brain to enjoy it because this was too much 🤣. Geralt is a mutant with more strength than a human and high speed reflexes but he doesn't fly or do flips like an olympic gymnast - even game geralt isn't that flexible 😅 - or break metal chains by flexing lol. I had circus music in my head during all the fights hehehe.

But more importantly what the fuck was that with the magic signs and the potions. The potions were badly used and the signs were like full magic.

If you loved the fights, good on you, but don't come to tell me they were canon 😅.

But you know what ? They went full gear for the spectacular, so let's enjoy it for what it is. No more no less.

One last thing I want to talk about and that I found well done, because it links book Jaskier to the series one and it highlights one big things about the witcher books in general.

Jaskier lies - The unreliable narrator

This is one big thing of the books. The story is given to us through the lens of several unreliable narrator and we discover in the later books that Jaskier could be the main for the Continent history.

In the books it is stated that Jaskier lies a lot especially in his art. Series Jaskier is set up also like that but this is not really a big deal.

In this movie, they threw Jaskier right in the center of the unreliable narrator.

From Essi and Geralt conversation on the balcony at the party, we have a right in the middle book and series Jaskier vibe. He exaggerated Geralt achievements, changed the events, but we understand the truth beneath.

But we learn that our boy lied about his past and built himself a story to feat his persona. And we know Jaskier lies and embellishes things a lot. In this story, they emphasise on that : he lied about his past. He lies in his songs. And the next thing he does : He sings about erasing things he doesn't like. (My story).

We have a glimpse of him being bullied, but we also have Essi saying to Geralt that he went through a lot. Jaskier wanted to erase the pain is a strong feature. This could be a strong way to end in S5, for his character (and Ciri's too).

The ending of A Little Sacrifice is him muting forever the fact that Essi died and the story attached to her. Jaskier is very vocal and noisy, but he is silent when he is in real pain.

And there is actually one thing in A little Sacrifice that can concur with the fact that he could be not an Oxenfurt academy's elite member as he claims : the fact that he mocks Yennefer's explanation of the tides, while he is supposed to have mastered Astronomy too (one of the 7 liberal arts).

“I think you’re a fool. Yennefer once told me that the moon causes the tides.”

Dandelion cackled.

“What bloody rubbish! What does the moon have to do with the sea? Only dogs howl at the moon. She was having you on, Geralt, that little liar of yours, she put one over on you. Not for the first time either, I’d say.”

I am not fully on board on the new headcanon but I like the narrator aspect.

Conclusion

What was missing (or not) :

The pearl for Essi. The tragic ending. Because these were iconic. But in this version I am not sure this was really necessary to have that. I wish that at some point we have a mention of Essi's death and how it affects Jaskier…

The og geraskier moments. But… I mean… if we had them as they were written, the fandom would have explode in rainbows 😅. Let's take only Geralt and Jaskier sharing a bed, talking about love 🤭. But if you read between the lines, in the end, you have your full geraskier in the feels loool.

What I liked :

For me that was the strong point from all the characterisations especially Geralt. This version of Geralt felt more Geralt to me that before in the series. From his self loathing that is finally highlighted, even if it is by proxy, to his fragility towards his feelings. I needed that part of Geralt. We also have the illustration of his moral code, sense of justice and need to protect. All in one go. And it feels right.

His relationship with Jaskier feels more normal also. I was dying to have a buddies on the road feeling from them. I mean we finally had that in S3 but in this movie it feels like a salve healing S1 relationship between them.

Having Geralt being awkward at flirting is also efreshing. I like that he expresses his feelings a bit more, says how different he thinks he is and his views on humans. Love was surviving. In his experience he found it hard to trust humans. He doesn't want to fall in love with short span living humans. He feels he needs somebody more like him. Hence Yennefer.

Note for some of the angry reviews :

Geralt and Jaskier's deal for money. Geralt and Essi knowing the merspeak. Jaskier pushing for Geralt to be with Essi and drop Yennefer. Essi and Geralt having sex. If that was too predictable for some or easy trick, well I am sorry for you, this was in the short story 😅.

So yeah this Geralt is just at the junction of series Geralt and book Geralt, and that is something I greatly appreciated to most I think.

Then the absence of oversexualisation of the mermaid and overall the less pervert eye, if I can say that like that. Maybe this is not something that translate to men as much, but as much as I love A Little Sacrifice - this is my favorite short story - this is quite uncomfortable to read as a woman sometimes. Well Geralt's gaze on women is often incomfortable to be fair lool. So yeah, having less of that and more connection was a plus for me.

The changes on Agloval character and the mermaid. Their love story feels right.

Essi and Jaskier singing together, even though the set up is not the same. But it was too short 🥲. But I guess this is because I miss Joey a lot.

What I didn't like :

The fights. I won't repeat what I already said. The physicality was way over the top. But at least it was fun to watch.

Less fights and maybe we could have more of emotional build up for Essi and Geralt. A part of me believes this is the response to “the witcher is about the path and killing monster discours that runs a lot” that pushed the story in that direction. Who knows ? But if that's so, just 😩.

The chaos with the use of the merspeak. This was really confusing and narratively weird.

So :

If you take this as an pure adaptation of the short story, there are some miss points that are hard to get over. It didn't have most of the iconic moments and vibe. Nor the emotional impact.

If you take this like a filler in S1. This is really enjoyable. It connects a lot of things and gives more layers to both Geralt and Jaskier.

[luna-rainbow]

Heard somebody say a while back that all non-Americans are against Captain America in Civil War.

Sounds like a sweeping generalization because... well, I am not American and I am agaisnt the Accords because of the horrible implications for human rights.

Just asking you for a second opinion though!

I think I've seen that meta float around some time ago. Written by a Tony Stan I believe? Followed by an excellent thesis length rebuttal from chirpingtiger

It was kind of what inspired my post about American imperialism in the MCU, and how Tony was representative of that domineering worldview.

I think the person making that argument was banking on the "117 countries ratified the Accords" and their flawed understanding that the UN was representative of the people of the world.

If the MCU UN is anything like ours, there are currently 193 member countries of the UN (obviously MCU would include fictional Wakanda and Sokovia). Only 25 of 167 rated nations are truly democratic, while 50 others are "flawed democracies", including the U.S. Yes, that shocked me as well. 59 of those 167 countries are determined to be authoritarian regimes.

What that means is that the delegate from these countries do not represent what their constituents want. They may or may not vote in the best interests of their country and people. UN voting is also well known for countries forming little cliques, usually by exchange of economic promises, in order to get more votes on a preferred issue.

117 countries - we have no idea who those countries even are. We have no idea why the other 70+ countries voted no, and whether they had far more valid reasons to do so. We have no idea if the 117 nations who voted yes because they truly believed in the issue or was offered some sort of bargain by a bigger sovereign power.

Honestly, the movie hand-waved the Accords in the hopes people would be too distracted by the action to question what it actually stood for. The buzzword used by Tony is accountability, and I think that's what a lot of people snagged on. Who doesn't think that powerful people, especially those from America, whose military like to get their nose in everyone's business, and with whom the Avengers seem to be associated -- who doesn't think checks and balances need to be in place?

The devil is in the (non-existent canon) detail, though. Because what that suggests is the Avengers has been functioning as a private entity (how??) and General Ross's proposal is only intended to get them more firmly enmeshed with American interests.

So yeah, it makes no sense that "non American people", who want more accountability for the American military, would be against Captain America, who was acting directly in defiance to the Lieutenant General of the US Army.

[eriisaam]

Good news! I can finally stop spamming this post!

Bad news, getting the magikoopa to dupe itself takes a lot more setup than it looks, and spoiler alert: it was fucking annoying.

How annoying, you ask? As-is, this shit is too crowded out the get-go. If there's other units in place, especially non-magikoopas, then these magikoopas will prioritize spamming the shit out of healing and/or buffing spells on the non-magic units.

But you also can't just narrow it down to ONE magikoopa, cuz guess what? The motherfucker will flee if they're the last and only unit left (and being reminded of that after carefully killing all but the flying one only to have that last one run away on me made me nearly scream.)

ANYWAYS. I accidentally grounded the flying one, but thank fuck, grounded and flying magikoopas both count to this experiment, and I got the one on the left to duplicate. To explain why the screenshot looks so borked, when duped, the magikoopa and their clone will phase in and out of view, and I caught the original mid-damage while the clone was mid-phasing (but you can hopefully see them). Like last time, I saved after the cloning happened, but before I did anything, and to be clear: The one on the far left is the original, the middle one is a copy on the left, and the right is a different, unrelated magikoopa I kept alive to keep the first one from running away.

So, to answer the second phase of this long shitshow:

If a magikoopa from Bowser's Castle used their Illusion move and made a copy of itself, can Goombario tell the difference between the real and fake magikoopa via Tattle (like he could with Crystal King/like Goombella can in the sequel)?

The answer?

YES.

So that answers that.... what now?

For now, I'll post my findings on the post that inspired this all (but condensed), and while I have interest in testing other Paper Mario findings, that's in a "do over time/eventually" thing rather than a "haul ass as fast as possible" thing, will be split up into separate posts in a series of posts I'll probably tag as Paper Mario 64 Discovery Saga (or something along the lines) when I get around to it, and I might get around to it after getting other stuff done first.

It also might take a moment, cuz in both findings here, and stuff to test later, I already see some Broth covered anyways (such as the above Jr Troopa findings+), and I wanna not only sort out what's stuff that's already documented, and what stuff to test all in one go (and not spontaneously out of order like this post saga did, hence why I keep running into 'stuff to test long after the point I could've tested it' issues cuz all of this was impulse rushed) so if I'm gonna do a longhaul of this whole game again, at least I'm more aware of everything I need to check out first.

+ Specifically, he mentions in this post about the same (typo'd) unique dialogue Jr Troopa has if you try to jumpscare him out of the battle, though like I said, when I tested it, it was in the second-to-last Jr Troopa battle between Shiver City and Starborn, I stress-tested with Fright Jar, Spook, Hurricane and Air Lift (I can't test with Up & Away that battle), and he only commented on Spook and Air Lift. Based on the screencaps, when he tested it on the last battle, mentions the comment happened with both Spook and Fright Jar, and this makes me wonder one thing while confirms another thing.

At the very least, it confirms to me that Jr Troopa does have a reaction that seems to carry over across his battles (so one immediate thing I'd be interested testing is whether or not his reaction changes based on all the other encounters leading up to these final two), whether or not he gains or loses awareness to certain factors (for instance Fright Jar didn't do anything for me in the second-to-last battle, but does he react in his last battle?), or if there's other reactions otherwise.

Other things I wanna test out (organized in order of when you can actually do them, and excluding stuff I know was documented, people already know, or what was already tested above):

If you lure a Koopa Troopa or Spiky Goomba to the bridge on Pleasant Path with the red and green diamond pattern and battle him on it, there's a unique battle background showing the bridge.

If you're standing on the table in the Koopa Village Toad House, the Toad will yell at you to get off the table before he lets you use his services.

One of your party members is recruited when you break open a lantern she is being held hostage inside. Most players just whack the lantern with the hammer, but if you break the lantern by blowing it up with Bombette, she complains that it wasn't necessary to use that much force.

In the scene following the Fuzzipede battle, your partner mentions remembering Twink saying where the next Star Spirit is. Since the battle takes place in darkness, you normally can't damage Fuzzipede without having Watt out, but if you wear the Zap Tap badge or use a Volt Shroom at the right time, you can end the battle with a different partner out, and all of the partners actually have unique dialogue for this scene.

Generally, you can deliver letters to recipients at any time. In the case of Kolorado, there's a point during chapter 5 where he's been badly hurt by a spiked rolling rock, but he gets back up as soon as you enter the next room. You can deliver him a letter during this very brief period, and not only will he have unique dialogue for it, Parakarry will break his usual spiel to ask if he's okay.

If using Cloud Nine when Mario is under the effect of Dizzy, Sleep or Freeze, Lakilester will pick him up with his cloud instead of having Mario jumping on it.

But for now, I'm taking a fat fucking break, and catching up on shit, and for the mutuals whose been following along or at least been super patient seeing this post recycled several times in a row: Thank you.

When you woke up planning to try to get some work done despite feeling icky and burnt out, only to get derailed by splitting attention across four or five games that need your attention, and a fifth you now have to longhaul to try to test/prove a point

[they-didnt-last]

anyone interested in talking about the iconic 2000's middle-grade-bordering-on-ya book series gallagher girls??

[welcometogrouchland]

Batman #149 by chip zdarsky is mostly unremarkable, but I'm really fascinated by how it makes a great case for 'good' endings not saving 'bad' stories*. Because there's a lot of interesting concepts in this issue (bruce having to deal with his rapidly aging and decaying clone making him think about his own life, re-establishing a 'nest' so to speak for his family after pushing them away, etc) but bc of the OOC slog that came before it, almost every moment w/ the batfamily comes off as unearned and disingenuous imo.

Like, everything with Damian is the perfect example in this. Because in isolation it's...fine. admittedly it's a missed opportunity to not go deeper into how Damian would feel about a clone of his dad who tried to kill considering Damian's relationships with clones of himself (the heretic rejects and respawn) or with former enemies who wanted him dead but who were manipulated and/or brainwashed (like suren and maya).

Zdarsky doesn't go into any of this but you could maybe excuse it as the issue not being about Damian. However, coupled with the previous bizarre characterizations of Damian in 147 and 148, it ends up not being fine- instead it starts to feel...icky how Damian (who, despite often being drawn and written as white, will never have his connection to the non-white al ghuls forgotten and will always be effected by racism even when not portrayed as a poc) is constantly written as overly violent, uncaring and narrow minded in this run. Coupled w/ trying to recanonize the morrison origin for Damian it's like. OH this is badly written and laden with subtle bigotry, sick**

That's me going into detail on it with Damian but it's applicable to other things in this issue- the way Cass, Steph and Duke have all been ignored or turned into jobbers makes their inclusion in the 'family' here feel hollow instead of satisfying. Bruce proclaiming that Zur was still a part of him and he needs to accept responsibility for his actions (when it means taking in clone son) wrings hollow when just last issue zdarsky was bending over backwards to separate Bruce and Zur bc otherwise the Jason thing would get really awkward. Ends are achieved through means that feel hollow or strange. I'm at my destination but damn why'd the bus have to do all that???

I only really have opinions on this latest arc of zdarskys Batman bc it's the one I've read the closest (bc I'm a hater, masochist and avid follower of even the bad damian storylines) but it's not saying great things.

Bc zdarsky can do one thing good in this book, and it's write Bruce and Tim. And yet this entire story, whether of his own volition or editorial mandate, includes other characters who aren't Bruce and Tim, the fabric starts to unravel in very telling ways.

(p.s, I think pennyworth manor is an interesting idea but I feel like in execution it's just gonna be 'bruce living in a house haunted by the memory of the people he couldn't save' but with a different dead guy this time. Illusion of change and whatnot)

*whether or not the ending is good is up to you ofc, as is your opinion on the proceeding arc! I saw some ppl complain that the ending was too "WFA" for them, which I get even if I dont think it'll literally be the same premise. If anything it's probably a lead into the new tec run. Likewise many ppl who aren't in the weeds of Damian and Jason characterization liked the previous arc! But I have my opinions and rest my case before the bench

**disclaimer, I'm white and portrayals of bigotry in comics are complicated and subjective, but I am basing my point here off what other poc comic fans on socmed have been saying about 149. Also the "sick" is sarcasm incase that wasn't obvious