#also there was more stuff with Three and Four but i dont think ill finish those scenes...
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cryptocism ¡ 1 year ago
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there is something so visceral about the six focused chapters you’ve written. like from the get-go his POV is just completely defined by loneliness. and also i had my suspicions but i can’t believe six actually was the one to take out his own eyes…
GOD YEAH. Six got a lot more spotlight in this story than originally planned, but its tough NOT to write a million words about a character who can access all of time and space but only if he Never Interacts with it in any meaningful way. the implications... i didnt think about the implications....
also i just love a time traveller character they are my kryptonite
in the original outline i had some flashback sequences with Six and his technological devices: the myriad ways he originally tried to shield himself from Three, eventually building Seven, giving himself cybernetics, then the addition of the visor, but it ended up pulling focus from his interactions with the kids and his non-interactions with Three.
also i think there's something more unsettling in one offhanded sentence about a single surgery that he experienced multiple times from all possible perspectives rather than describing the process in detail
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forestryfae ¡ 1 year ago
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so first of all i need rly need a bike. fucking nice. i have one but from what i remember its too tall plus its been in the garage for like 5 years. so thats a nice thing to waste money on
secondly i need more pants, some of the thinner ones are starting to get too small. again.
thirdly i was p much woken up with "you need to move rooms today" an hour before work like three or four months ago and i was told id be moving into a FINISHED room. it resulted in me complaining for 3 months that my room didnt have a heater, the lights in the entryway and room didnt work, and the light in the bathroom is screaming at me.
so instead of like. fixing any of this they just stole a lightbulb from the room i was in before i moved and put it in my new room. they also checked the lamp in the bathroom but "i cant hear anything" so they just didnt fix the screeching. i still havent gotten anew lightbulb in the hall and i finally got heater sometime during summer vacation
forth of all they also. keep fucking changing the rules. some of the people here will happily wait five minutes extra for people without them needing to ask and gladly comes knocking on tveir door, but some of them will tell you you need to let them know youll be 2 minutes late or theyll just leave without you. like what the fuck. i cant be a minute or two late so i can grab my fucking work clothes before i go to work??
why do some of these people get special treatment. why do they get extra care while i can be in my room crying for two days and noone notices. if im upset they usually dont talk to me unless im angry enough at them specifically to either scream or slam doors but any other person being sad warrants repeated attempts at a fucking intervention to fix everything. they dont come to my room if im not there for something they know id enjoy but theyll come get anyone else no problem. its person to person too so some of the workers very clearly have better communication and bonds with certain people and prioritize them and easily ask them to do stuff
i cant even talk to my fucking contacts or tell people when im so sad i dont know why im alive and im frequently forgotten about and ignored, and its not like i can say "i need people to actually show me im welcome and wanted because of how ive been treated in the past and how my brain is wired to anticipate social settings" xus thats not a real thing. im just being attentionseeking and whiny and ill just hear i "should be afraid to talk to people" and i "have to show initiative" and i shouldnt put the responsibility of whatever onto other people but like. its always been like that. im not welcome or expected unless im specifically invited, noone indirectly invites me then gets surprised that i didnt join or asks if im coming. most invitations are aimed at everyone too.
and im trying so hard too. i try so hard to fit in and act the way i think people would like, cus i know noone likes me when i try to just be myself, and somehow im still not likeable enougj. but if someones cranky or antisocial and generally harder to get to join or get out of their rooms thats fine, theyll try harder w that person. not with me though.
like. would be fucking nice if someone else could take the role of making sure im included because im wanted for once.instead of me having to do that myself and constantly worrying about it being a hit or miss. would be really fucking nice if someone could ask if im sad or upset in a genuine manner instead of fucking asking "how are you" or "what are you doing". noone asks how are you because they want to know how youre doing, they ask cus they want you to tell them youre okay so they dont have to talk to you. never in my life has either of thise questions meant anything other than say okay so i can congratulate myself for caring when i dont. its like saying hi. its not meant to be a real conversation.
like i really miss being able to say im not okay and being able to be angry. i literally cant do that anymore, im too numb to be angry, i dont know how to validate myself, none of my problems are big enough to be real, none of my feelings matter unless someone else says its ok to feel stuff, i cant say anything is wrong cus then im whiny and negative, i cant complain cus thats annoying and selfish, i cant have needs cus thats selfish, self centered, and egoistical and im not the only person in the world and im not the only one who matters, and i cant have stuff i want cus thats cringey. thats embarrassing.
i want a new house? i have one so why am i complaining, im only miserable cus im not trying hard enough to enjoy living there. i just need to go on walks daily and find something to do during the day. in an area where i dont know the forest with a budget of nothing if i wanna eat the last two weeks of the month without wasting my 1k nok in savings
i want family to come visit me? (not anymore but i used to) tough luck people have their own lives and are too busy to drive 30-45 minutes to spend a couple hours with me or help me with things they specifically told me theyd help me with like. once in a while. maybe even just once or twice a month. but if i call ahead i can take the train and come visit them for 6-8 hours minimum. i pay the ticket ofc. fuck them.
i want something new, like furniture im going to use or just a funky trinket i found or i want some new hobby materials for a hobby i wanna try? no i dont. you dont NEED that, you wont even use it, its a waste of money. no fun allowed.
i cant even talk about stuff i wanna DO or try or anything cus it doesnt matter. its not important so it doesnt matter. its not big enough. its all too small and its not interesting enough. nothing i say is worth listening to even if its the exact same shit everyone else talks about.
like. i just dont get it. theres clearly something very wrong here and i know my family is a huge reason for that but i just dont understand how everything works vs is supposed to work vs isnt supposed to work. i have no concept of normal and fucked up behaviour, i literally cant tell shit apart. i can tell when something upsets me, sometimes, but thats not a good enough reason to be angry or upset, and i cant base my social interactions on that. i cant tell if im uncomfortable or not either so thats fun. not that it matters.
like. idk. i just want a lightbulb so my room isnt so dark in the evening. i dont think its too much to ask. i dont think its an unfair accusation that i think itll take a week or two atleast before i get one and theyll forget i still need one for the entryway. they dont even have any extra lightbulbs so we dont have to go several days without a working ceiling light. they just never bought any.
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foolcrum57 ¡ 2 years ago
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YESYESYES TELL US ABOUT YOUR OCS PLEASEEEEEE <:DDD
ok this is message is from me whos about to post this after typing all of it. there is . A Lot here so im gonna put it under a readmore but the copious amount of infodumping is just what i do when people ask about my ocs... hope this isnt too long or overwhelming to read lol..
OMG OK ok so i collectively call all my oc stuff "wttu" (welcome to the universe) but i have 2 seperate oc universes (i have a lot of ocs) ones called godsworld and ones called newsworld. newsworld is really random & spotaneous & where i dump all my silly ocs and godsworld is the more coherent one with a solid storyline & worldbuilding. i feel like talking about godsworld ocs right now so that's what ill do ! ok so quick synopsis. godsworld is a multiverse comprised of many dimensions, all created by three gods named time, choice, and destiny. magic is real and common and magicians have existed since the beginning of time. there's also a few very special super magical very powrful beings / demigods called all-seers which were specifically "blessed"(idk how else to put it) by the gods. these are the 4 all-seers as of godsworlds present:
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(sorry for the doodles im drawing these as i type) william and miso were created by the gods and given allseer powers later in life and around 200 years later the same thing happened to gertrude and mitchell after they met william and miso (yeah these guys are like ancient immortal people i call them the four immortals) anyways that's like the ancient stuff lore so now let's get to the main stuff the main storyline of godsworld centers around a kid named tobias , and a guy named cremini finding out they're going to be the next two allseers, mainly because of their connections to tobias' late father (and creminis ex classmate ex roomate and sort of ex boyrfriend) Larry.
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and like. that's kinda where the lore and worldbuilding part gets vauge because the present is kind of just these guys having adventures and doing fun stuff while honing their magic skills. there's still a little more to talk about though.
after living out his childhood in a town called santerton, tobias went to live in a magical sanctuary in a dimension that the four immortals made and where miso and william live called the Home(creative i know) where he met 3 other guys around his age that are now his besties ;
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parker is royalty from a dimension that's still in the 1800s (hes pretty smug and arrogant both bc of his upbringing and also just because that's his personality), carson is a city kid from a dimension that's still in the 90's (he's a pretty chill guy despite his circumstances and the oldest out of all 4), and daniel's from a remote fishing town in a dimension that's somewhere in the 2010s (who ironically, loves fishing and is also just really energetic and hearty in general). on the other hand, cremini, after finishing college at a very prestigious school for time and dimension studies that mitchell teaches at and fulfilling his childhood dream of time traveling and then accidentally throwing himself into a white void Because Emotions, met. this guy.
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his name is dylan. and he is now cremini's boyfriend and they live together. he loves books and reading (which he gained a love for after gertrude [who is a librarian] helped him with pushing through his dyslexia). honestly idk what else to type, that's kinda just the general gist of the main characters in godsworld but there is like a lot of lore and history and a solid timeline with lots of stories and characters in the whole world of godsworld as well as a lot of worldbuilding stuff that i didnt touch on so i think the fact that this is a relatively consice recap says. a lot. anyways if you read down to here i genuinely appreciate it and um please dont hesitate to ask more ocs questions wether that be in my asks or dms or whatever <3
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whosaskingwrites ¡ 4 years ago
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Forever Is A Long Time (Akaashi x Reader)
A/N: I'm alive. And finally starting my soulmate one-shots. 😔 sorry if you've been waiting for these i wanted to get the angst ones done first. Also im almost at 100 followers which means ill be having a follower special soon! So be ready for that. Anyway have a good day!
Date: Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
Details: 6.3 pages 2,308 words
Theme: Red String- There is a red string tied around your ring finger that connects you to your soulmate. It becomes visible when you are close to each other. You can also tug on the string so your soulmate feels it. When far you only see it as a red ring around your finger.
Warnings: cursing. Barely implied sexual stuff its just one sentence and its nothing explicit.
Soulmate masterlist
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For as long as I could remember I had a pale red ring around my finger. I never asked questions about it since I knew what it was. My soulmate was out there somewhere but I was never curious about them.
I would have been but my mom stressed to me that I needed to be successful. Not worrying about some silly soulmate so I did. Every thought about my soulmate was pushed to the back of my mind and I slowly forgot about them. My friend Hinata always tried to get me to find them but I denied.
I ended up becoming the manager for the MSBY Black Jackals. I considered it the perfect job I wasn't as successful as my mom wanted me to be but I was happy with what I was doing.
I was always busy so my soulmate had never crossed my mind. My days were spent corraling Bokuto and Hinata while keeping Atsumu away from Sakusa's stuff. The rest of the team members like Meian and Barnes didn't need watching but they also never helped me.
Today was no different of course. Well unless you counted the fact that it was the Black Jackals versus the Schweiden Adlers. Hinata was bouncing around in excitement and Bokuto wasn't much better. Currently I was helping Sakusa fix his knee pads deciding to let Hinata be excited this once.
"Y/N!" I jumped throwing a hand over my heart as I stood up. I looked at Bokuto who was staring at me eyes wide. "Don't do that Bo!" I yelled smacking him on the back of the head. "Owww sorry it's just your hand!" I looked down at my hand and looked back up raising an eyebrow.
"What?" I asked in confusion Bokuto sighed reaching forward and raising my other hand. There around my ring finger was a thin red string. "Y/n's soulmate is here!?" Hinata yelled rushing over to see the string. "Oh cool I guess," I took my hand from Bokuto's grasp bringing it back down with a shrug.
"You're not excited about it?" Atsumu asked "Not really? Mom raised me to not worry about my soulmate so," I trailed off before I felt a strong tug on my hand. Looking down I noticed Hinata pulling on the string before someone pulled back.
I smacked his hand as he went to tug it again "quit doing that," I said moving to pick up my clipboard. "But thats how you find them! The stronger the tug the closer they are!" He shouted while I shook my head. "Hinata I'm not worried about my soulmate. The game is in 10 minutes so let's get you guys to the court," I stated looking at them.
"I don't get it how the hell are you Omi and Samu not interested in your soulmates!" Atsumu shouted as we left the changing room. "I'm just not big on the soulmate thing," I said with another shrug "I don’t really care if I find them or not," Sakusa added on with his own shrug.
"You guys are so boring! Y/n you're the first outta of the five of us to be close to your soulmate and you don't wanna meet them!?" Bokuto shouted in exasperation. "I dont see what the big idea is. I'm not interested in meeting my soulmate right now. Now go warm-up," I gently pushed the boys towards the court while I went to the bench. 
I shook my head as Hinata mouthed "Find them," at me. I sighed as I watched them feeling a gentle tug against my finger my eyes drifted to the red string before I cautiously tugged back. It brought an odd sense of comfort to feel every tug on the thread and it almost seemed like a habit for them to nervously tug the string.
My eyes shifted back to the court as the game started. My hand made notes that occasionally got messed up when a tug shook my hand. I quietly hummed when I realized they were trying to find me.
Halfway through the game the tugs had become annoying. They started hindering my writing the closer they got and the boys had most definitely noticed my annoyed state. They had come over for water and towel during a short timeout while I was finishing a note for Bokuto when my hand was suddenly tugged sharply to the side scratching a mark across the sentence id just written.
"Son of a bitch!" I quietly cursed though it was loud enough that the four boys heard me. "You alright Y/n?" Atsumu asked and I glared at him. The boys froze at the icy gaze.
"No I'm not okay. Everytime I try writing these damn notes my soulmate tugs on the fucking string and ruins it. I'm fed up with it and quite frankly I really don't want to meet them at this point," I stated angrily. "Come on Y/n its just notes-" my glare shifted to Hinata as he spoke causing him to shiver.
"Just notes? It is my job to write notes. If the notes are unreadable I have failed at my job and you know what these notes are?" I held up my clip board before slamming it back down on the bench. "Unreadable!"   I yelled before taking a breath. "Now finish your game boys and if you lose. Ill kill you," I sent them a threatening smile before they ran off to the court in fear.
___________________________________________
"I just don't get it man! How is she not excited!" I paused as I entered the shop. Hearing Bokuto yell as soon as I walked in. "I mean I get it. If my soulmate kept me from making Onigiri correctly I'd be mad," Osamu supplied waving to me as I walked in.
"Whats going on?" I asked looking at the guys Kuroo rubbed his forehead while Bokuto looked at me. "Please don't get him started on his damn manager again," Kuroo mumbled while Bokuto spoke up. "Hey Akaashi what's your idea of a soulmate?" I blinked at the sudden question "Someone who will be with you forever I guess," I said after I thought about it. 
"Our manager doesn't care about meeting her soulmate!" Atsumu yelled out throwing his hands up while Kuroo groaned. I came over and sat down across from Bokuto. "You guys are making a huge deal out of it," Sakusa said rolling his eyes.
"Well she should care! I can't believe she went home instead of celebrating just to fix her notes," Hinata stated with a huff. "What happened?" I asked my eyes flickering to Osamu when he placed a tray of onigiri down in front of me.
"Y/n's soulmate was at today's game! They even kept tugging on the string but she said she didn't care!" I paused as I processed Bokuto's words. I had been at the game when my string appeared. I tugged on it whenever I got nervous during the game.
I had eventually followed it during break only to discover it led me to the doors on court and suddenly it all made sense. "Oh," I said when I realized. "What?" Hinata questioned and I shook my head. "Nothing just...my string also showed up during the game," I stated looking back at Hinata. "Oh," he said but then his face lit up "oh!" He stood up suddenly and Bokuto joined him.
"Oh my god! You think-?" Bokuto trailed off excitedly looking at me. "You guys saying he's her soulmate?" Atsumu also stood up in excitement. While Kuroo sent me a look that screamed 'What have you done?' "Guys there was a lot of people at the game," Osamu said rolling his eyes.
"Yeah doesn't mean Y/n is his soulmate," Sakusa also said with an agitated sigh. Bokuto snapped his head over to me with a wide excited smile. "Did you follow the string?" He asked bouncing in his spot. "A little bit during break yes," I said as I automatically started playing with my fingers.
"And?" Hinata drawled out leaning towards me. "...It lead me to the doors leading on court," there was a brief moment of silence before the three boys started screaming. "Someone get her over here right now!" Atsumu shouted while Hinata pulled out his phone.
It went dead silent as he called the boys seemed to freeze in place staring at the phone that was on speaker. "What the hell do you want?" All four boys flinched at the angry tone and Kuroo shivered at it. "We think we found him Y/n!" Hinata excitedly yelled.
"Found who?" She asked in confusion causing Atsumu to sigh in irritation. "Your soulmate Y/n!" He yelled in exasperation. "Fascinating. I don't care," She had responded back in annoyance. "Y/n come on! Just come to Onigiri Miya please!" Bokuto begged his eyes got big as he stared at the phone.
"No. And don't throw puppy eyes at the phone I know you're doing it," Bokuto sighed when it didn't work frowning as he tried to figure out what to do. "Please Y/n! Five minutes! I'll do anything you want!" Hinata joined in with a frown. 
"I already said no. Now leave me alone or I block you," She stated before hanging up the phone. The three boys turned their gazes to me after staring blankly at the phone. I looked back at them slowly "...what?" I asked nervously before Atsumu smirked at me. 'Oh boy' I thought worriedly.
___________________________________________
'How the hell did I get here?' I thought as I stood infront of an apartment door. I assumed it was Y/n's since Bokuto had shoved me here and rang the bell. I was still getting my bearings when the door swung open revealing a girl with h/c hair and shiny e/c eyes.
She was wearing a black jackals hoodie and a pair of leggings. I noticed the red string trailed from her hand to mine confirming she was my soulmate. "Can I help you?" She asked with a sigh.
Her voice snapped me out of my reprieve and I gave her a shaky smile. "Hi um I think your my soulmate?" What I said came off as more of a question as she blinked at me. "Who are you?" She didn't check the string before she asked. Establishing that she wasn't lying on the phone she really didn't care. "Im Akaashi Keiji," I said holding out my hand.
She hummed as she took it shaking my hand as her eyes finally traced the string. "So. You're Bokuto's elusive friend and the one who made me ruin my notes," I flinched as she let go of my hand immediately going to play with my fingers.
"Sorry about that. I tugged on it whenever the game made me nervous," she was watching my hands before she suddenly reached out and took one. I froze at the unexpected move as she held my hand. "Sorry you were distracting me. Continue?" She asked as she laced her fingers with mine.
"I..um," I had lost my train of thought looking at the pale pink flush that had appeared on her cheeks. "A-anyway why are you against soulmates?" She shook her head at my question. "Im not it's just...my mom raised me to put finding my soulmate on the backburner and focus on my career so I did,"
She continued after a brief pause "She focused on her soulmate and ended up working as a waitress as her career. She wanted me to be successful and that meant no room for a soulmate," She shrugged like it was the most casual thing in the world to not care about a soulmate.
"So...Where does that leave me?" I questioned quietly while she hummed. "Depends...are you gonna ruin my notes again?" She asked with a small smile. I smiled back when I realized what she was implying. "Maybe. Maybe not. Depends on the day," She laughed as I spoke her eyes drifted to the side sparkling in mischief as she spotted something.
She leaned forward to whisper in my ear "Seems the three musketeers stayed to keep watch," She mumbled tilting her head as she pulled back. I turned my head slightly seeing Bokuto, Atsumu, and Hinata hiding around the corner. They were excitedly holding on to eachother and I shook my head looking back at her.
"Unfortunately," I supplied while she giggled. "Im sure you already know but my name is L/n Y/n," She said and I nodded confirming I did already know. Her eyes still held mischief as she leaned forward again. "I think we should give them something to watch," she whispered lowly.
My face flushed at the implication of what she said. "Y/n-," She cut me off with a kiss. They were soft and fit against mine perfectly much like her hand did. My eyes slipped closed as I kissed her back. I vaguely heard the screaming of the three guys.
She slid something into my free hand before pulling away. She smirked at me letting go of my other hand "Have fun with that," she threw a vague hand gesture to the boys before going inside and closing the door.
Looking down at my hand she had left a small white business card in my hand. Her number was stretched across the front and I pocketed it before walking away. As I got closer to the three guys I was suddenly tugged backwards and fell.
I looked at my hand to the string following it to see Y/n holding the string with a smile on her face. She winked at me before disappearing while I quietly chuckled.
'This was gonna be an adventure'
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TAGLIST: @wonhomarshmallow
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duncanxtrent ¡ 3 years ago
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For the prompt thingy... Duncan and Trent as camp counselors... maybe ? 👀 Like they both take care of some kiddos and they are on diffrent teams so they have a friendly rivalry but they are crushing on each other. Or something idk jfjfkfk
(OMG SOMEONE ACTUALLY ASKED AND ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITE DUNTRENT ARTISTS YBUGKGUF)
Anyways
Wawanakwa Rivalry
Duncan quietly woke up inside the counselors cabin. He looks over and sees Trent peacefully snoring away. He smiles and gets up to put on some pants. Once hes fully uniformed, he takes a look at the schedule.
Once hes sure of the schedule, he walks up and bangs on the door of the Killer Bass cabin.
“Wake up guys! Its almost breakfast!” Duncan shouts.
Taka instantly opens the door, fully dressed in uniform.
“Ready to start the day, sir!”
(Yes I made the DR kiddos the camp kids leave me alone.)
Duncan laughs and ruffles Takas hair as Taka stands near the door. Groggily, Makoto, Kyoko, Sayaka, Leon, Chihiro, And Aoi make their way out of the cabins. Duncan does a quick headcount, but then makes a strange face.
“Wheres Mondo?” He asks
“Hes still asleep” Leon groans
“Ill go get him!” Taka says stomping inside the cabin. Soon he drags out a very tired and Groggy Mondo from inside.
“Its too early for this. Just let me go the fuck to bed.” Mondo curses.
“Trust me. I also think its too early for this kid.” Duncan smiles. “But if you sleep any longer, you’ll miss todays french toast!”
That instantly seemed to get Mondos attention. Because he instantly ripped his arm from Takas hand, ran inside, stressed himself, and came back out to the other students.
“Right kids! Now whats our motto?”
Mondo gave an audible groan.
“Oh come on its funny.”
Mondo sighed but reluctantly saluted, as tre reat of the kids followed.
🎶One Two Three and Four! Killer Bass Will Get the Score!🎶
🎶Five Six Seven Eight! Gophers are trash, and Fish are Great!🎶
Duncan seemed to stifle a laugh on the last part. “Alright guys! Now stand in a straight line behind me.”
Taka instantly stood in the front with Mondo behind him as the rest of the students stood behind them.
“Alright, and MARCH!” The 9 of them marched off towards the cafeteria.
Once there, the kids returned to normal walking and headed to their cabin table. Once he was sure the kids were sat, he headed up to the cafeteria, only to encounter Trent getting the breakfast for his cabin.
“Trent! Hi…” Duncan says noticiably more nervous.
“Hey there, sup shorty!” Trent says wrapping his arm around Duncan. Duncan meeped.
“So how have the kids been?” He asks
“Well, Mondos been a bit of a hassle, but other than that the kids are great.” Duncan whispers timidly.
“Oho! Youre lucky. Celestia, Byakuya, Junko! Together those three kids are a mess of trouble! Ive mainly been able to get them under control, but What I wouldnt give to be in your cabin.”
“Same here.” Duncan mutters quietly.
“Hmm?”
“Nothing! Anyways I should probably finish up here and get the kids breakfast.” Duncan says quickly picking up the breakfast for the cabin.
“Oh… Ok…” Trent says disappointed.
Duncan immediately stops in his tracks. “But if you want to talk more counselor stuff! We can hang out when I hand off the kiddos to Courtney!” Duncan quickly yells.
“Oh! Ok sure!” Trent quickly responds.
“Its a date!” Duncan says walking off. Trent turns beet red before walking off. Duncan immediately facepalms.
“A date? Really?! Come on you idiot! You should have done better than that!” Duncan mutters pacing back and forth.
“Um… Mr. Tarun.” Sayaka tugs at Duncans pants.
Duncan notices and realizes hes still holding the kids breakfast. “O-oh! Sorry!” Duncan nervously laughs.
He walks around the table and gives each of the kids a plate of breakfast, containing french toast, sausage, and scrambled eggs with lemonade. The kids quickly begin eating their breakfast. Duncan sits down with his plate and begins quietly eating while contemplating his life choices. However, the kids quickly got into some trouble.
“H-hey stop that!” Taka says nervously.
Duncan sat up and noticed that Junko and Byakuya were standing next to Mondo. Mondo seemed visibly upset.
“Whats wrong Diamond, cat got your tongue?” Junko taunts.
“What the hell do you to want?” Mondo asks angrily.
“Oh I just came over cause I thought youre french toast was looking plain.”
“My toast is fine.” Mondo says angrily shoving a bite of eggs into his mouth.
“Really? Cause I think this plate could use a nice slab of BUTTER!” Junko dumps a whole stick of tub of butter on Mondos French Toast. Mondo just stared at the toast, terrified.
(Context to this: I am partially referencing His execution. But in this case the reason for his trauma is that his dad was turned into a butter like substance following an experiment he was working on)
The rest of the kids at the table gasp. Leon begins laughing but Sayaka punches him in the arm.
Junko laughs. “Oh whats wrong? Did I not add enough? Do you want some syrup as well?” She taunts.
Byakuya simply stifles a laugh. “A mere peasant frozen by a tub of butter. Pathetic.”
“H-hey leave him alone!” Taka says attempting to stand up to them.
“Or what?” Junko laughs
Taka meekly backs off.
Duncan angrily stomps towarfs the two bullies.
“Hey you two! Leave Mondo Alone!” Duncan shouts.
“Oh shut up you faggot! We all know you want inside our camp counselors pants! Why dont you run along like the squealy girl you are?” Junko sneers.
Duncan becomes even more angry. “If the two of you dont leave right now, Im sending the two of you home!” Duncan threatens.
“And then what? Lose the Trust of your little boyfriend.” Byakuya laughs.
Duncan is about to knock the little shits heads off when suddenly Trent comes up behind him.
“Duncan, you may step out of the situation.” Trent says putting a hand on his shoulder.
“But-“
Trent leans into his ear. “Trust me, dude, I got this!” Trent whispers.
Duncan backs off as Trent approaches the two children.
“Junko, Byakuya, my office. NOW!” Trent shouts firmly.
Trent walks the two children to his office and eventually returns back to the cafeteria.
“Im having them clean out the toilets for the next week. Those two went way too far.” Trent explains.
“Thank you…” Duncan mumbles.
“Hey its no problem.” Trent outs a hand on Duncans shoulder. “We gotta look out for each other right bro?”
Trent leans in closer to Duncan, and without thinking about what hr was doing, Duncan leaned in and quickly pecked Trent on the lips.
Trents face went incredibly red while Duncan seemed nervous.
“Oh jeez Im sorry, I didnt mean to, I just thought thats what we were doing and-“ Hes immediately caught off by Trent taking Duncans head in his gands and bringing him in for a second kiss. The kiss becomes a loving kiss and the two of them stand there hugging while kissing eachother.
“Ewwwwwwwwww!!!! Ms Satellaaaaa!!!!! Mr.Tarun and Mr.Cooper are kissiiiiing!!!!!!” Sayaka shouts.
They both let go of the kiss and look at Sayaka as Trent begins laughing. Duncan sees this and begins laughing too.
“So Im guessing you like me too then?” Trent asks sarcastically.
“Yeah. Always kinda have.” Duncan laughs.
“Well then, maybe we could hand the kids off to Courtney and Gwen, and the two of us can spend the rest of the day hanging by the lake.” Trent says twirling Duncans hair.
“That sounds lovely.” Duncan mumbles leaning into Trents chest.
“EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!” The kids stick their tongues out seeing their counselors kissing.
Trent and Duncan just laugh before letting go of each other and going towards their respective tables. Duncan sits and begins happily eating his breakfast.
Meanwhile Kiyotaka notices the whole event unfold, and just as Mondo finishes clearing the butter on his plate, pecks Mondo on the cheek before returning to his food.
Mondo looks at him increduously, blushing red for a second before just shaking his head and returning to his food
(END)
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softboyscully ¡ 4 years ago
Text
Public School Stuff I Wanted to Share
public school is both beautiful and horrifying am i right
so ill just go by the grades i guess
Kindergarten, first year
i did kindergartden at a catholic school in a relativly big city so this one’s got some shit
we went to church every wednesday, me and best friend (lost track of her when we moved, wish we’d stayed in touch, she was awesome) would giggle the whole time, pretty sure we made fun of jesus once, can’t remember why, possibly the hair
i had the nicest teacher, she was (as i remember her) young, blonde, and super sweet, that was the first and last year i ever had naptime
SPEAKING of naptime
i never slept during it
once i found what i remember being a nut of some sort on the ground, probably came off someone’s shoe
i grab it, turn to sarah (my best friend), say something about putting it up my nose
sarah, apparently having common sense, says, “no dont do it!! we’re supposed to be sleeping!!”
i put it up my fucking nose
try to get it out, just push it farther in
im crying a little bit now, that shit hurts
go up to my teacher
“you’re supposed to be asleep!”
“i have a nut up my nose and it wont come out”
teacher tries to get it out, but it wont budge
just. sends me back to my mat
that was it
the art room was tiny
like re-purposed broom closet tiny
there was a copy of the mona lisa in the hallway, someone had drawn ray bans on it with a pencil, never got replaced
there was a creepy-ass basement i went down to after school, we ate cheeseballs and sandwiches with some kind of meat, mayo, and that kinda yellow bread
someone broke his leg down there once, think an older kid threw him at the ceiling or something
we learned how to play Silver Bells with actual bells in music class
Kindergarten, second year
i remember these two teachers as the evil step sister-type look, but it might be my little kid imagination
but seriously they were horrible
we learned stuff in a room that was more middle-school styled, except everything was green or black and it was v dark
me and sarah attained a new friend, john
honestly i think we would’ve stayed friends for a while if i didnt move away
i have two vivid memories
one is of me really wanting to go home, so i walked by the teacher’s desk and did a fake sneeze
they laughed at me and told me to go sit back down
the other is  john leaning his chair back and then falling, so me and sarah went to help him back up
it was funny, so he did it again
and again
me and sarah were laughing, had the time of our lives
after the maybe fifth time the teachers said “john can get back up by himself. sit down and stay there.”
one of the reasons we moved was bc i got sent a letter from my fourth grade buddie
most of the words weren’t spelled correctly, many letters were backwards
my mother was horrified
ofc now we know it was probably a learning disability 
1st grade
this is when i moved
beginning of school i was ASTOUNDED we didnt have uniforms, one of the best things ever to happen to me
nothing wrong with this teacher, she was cool
thing is i was a little shit
told everyone my dogs died (they did but i was maybe three when it happened, i remember it not)
all my personal narratives were bullshit (only one sticks in my memory, wrote it about celebrating christmas AND hanukkah with my dad’s friends who were jewish, i have never even met those friends)
had a crush on this kid, best friend (she was terrible and helped wreck me emotionally) told me to kiss him in music class. me being a stupid ass bitch, i did it, aND HE GOES TO THE TEACHER AND CALLS ME OUT. at the end of class she gets both of us to stay for a bit, AND I DENYIED EVERYTHING. i walked across the fucking classroom, kissed him on the cheek, ran away giggling, told my teacher i didn’t do anything, AND GOT AWAY WITH IT. i’ve embarrassed myself further with this child but thats another story
2nd grade
i loved this teacher but honestly he was absolute shit
like. all he did was play the guitar and sing with us
never actually taught us stuff???
middle of the year, my mom goes in for a parent-teacher conference, he tells her i dont pay attention is math.
“what do you mean?”
“she doesn’t listen, she just takes out a book and starts reading.”
“........have you.... tried taking the book away?”
“sure, i could try that.”
“o....kay”
he also told her i’d be a girl who’d grow up to love spellcheck (which i do lmao)
like ???? why not just??? teach me to spell????
there was this one dude who one day showed up, gave me a pink stuffed cat, and then asked me where i lived
funniest thing was he lived on the same street as me
something that is vivid in my memory is showing up to class one day and realizing that i was wearing my regular clothes over my pajamas
also we had fish
every day someone else was in charge of feeding them
one of the times it was my job, i grab the fish food and walk over to the tank only to find all of the fish floating on the top
i screamed “THE FISH CAN FLY?!?!?!?!?!”
everyone ran over, all of us scarred for life when Mr. G walks over and goes in the most normal voice ever “no theyre dead”
we held a funeral
the cause of death is still undetermined
3rd grade
this year just draws a blank for me
all i know is that whoever the teacher was, they neglected to teach me how to tell time from a clock
also we learned the Cotten Eyed Joe dance in gym around here
4th grade
i had two teachers this year
one was the same one from 1st grade, the other one was a total bitch
made a girl named hannah ball her eyes out once, never apologized
i was (and am) and avid reader, so my reading skills were high above average
instead of being proud of me she told me i was weird, not normal, and too smart for a 4th grader, so i MUST be cheating. 
she was the start of a lot of self confidence issues for me ngl
this was around the time i went and got tested for ADHD (me and my grandmother almost broke down on the highway but thats another story), Mrs. M (the nice one) was super supportive when i told her why i was leaving early but Ms. S (bitch) told me ADHD wasn’t real and i just wanted to be special for once
she sucked, Ms. S
5th grade
this is getting super long so this’ll be the last one i do
but my teacher..... Mr. F was A+++++
he legitimately taught me math
we had i guess like,,, a buddie class we switched with sometimes
the teacher of that class was Mrs. R, who had crazy red hair and many freckles
at one point she referenced a meme and my entire class started screaming
also there was another Mrs. S (to differentiate this one will be called Mrs. Su)
she was kind of crazy
she was the astronomy teacher and she told us many times that the moon landing was faked
once she handed out sunscreen and had everyone put it on their whole body (this was in december, fyi)
Mr. F also hosted an ‘archeological dig’ which sounds cool but in reality he had a bunch of arcade prizes from his childhood buried in little flower pots we dug into with plastic spoons
also heres some stuff i cants pinpoint the time of/happened in multiple grades:
someone held a who-can-scream-the-most-like-a-goat contest
a guy named Makenzie won
remember we planned it while the teacher left the classroom so the teacher walks back in and one by one everyone in the room starts screaming, there was some applause, a few kids got a standing ovation
we cleaned out our desks in the middle of the year, i found 3 socks and a dog treat in mine
like how the fuck did any of those things get there
and where’s the fourth sock
b o t t l e f l i p p i n g
but no seriously there were at least five water bottles stuck in the ceiling in the cafeteria
my sorta friend charlie was obsessed with paper airplanes
one time he might’ve broken the world record for longest time in the air but he was counting in his head and it was at recess so there was no video
four square and gaga ball would be played no matter the setting, time, or conditions and it was super competitive
like if you could get to king in four square you got the everlasting respect of everyone
and everyone was super educated on four square special rules, special plays, that kinda shit
no but guys i grew up with bus stop, candy store, haunted house on mondays, haunted mansion on fridays, zombies was fair game unless it was Zach, Ryan, Chrissy or Vee
me and one other guy named andrew were the only known pjo fans, had the time of our LIVES making refrences
“HEY ANDREW IM NOBODY”
“I HAVE WAITED YEARS FOR YOU, NOBODY, COME HERE AND FACE YOUR DEATH”
“hey annabeth, i thought you looked like a princess when i first saw you. i printed out a picture you sent me casually and kept it with me. i snuck along on a quest so i could save you, endangering myself immensely. i held the sky for you. when you talk about your crush on luke, i get jealous. beckendorf understood, but hes dead.”
“ikr we’re literally the best of friends”
“RIGHT”  
also the first time we finished mark of athena we were in the same classroom and we individually dropped the book, stood up, looked at each other, and screamed “WELL FUCK YOU TOO RICK RIORDAN”
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ge ¡ 5 years ago
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hi so i started playing onmyoji because of you and i wanted to ask if you can give me any tips?? im at level 16 i think im doing well so far but since idk anyone who plays anything would help! sorry for bothering
HEHE YESS ok.. this got rlly long WHOOPS 
so first thing u shld do while ur at a low level is get a mentor.. when i started playing i just fucked around and didnt get a mentor until i was well into lvl 40.. a mentorship is where low lvl (15 to 45 i tihnk..) players can apply for an apprenticeship and level up fast while also getting rewards such as grade darumas and a random ssr once u finish ur apprenticeship.. u can find the mentor application icon in the right side of ur courtyard.. it shld look like this!
Tumblr media
while under a mentor u are also lvling up ur friendship which, once it reaches a certain level, it unlocks the co-op feature that u can find by clicking the scroll at the bottom right hand side of ur screen > friends > co-op tab at the bottom right side of the pop up screen... there u can access ur friends powerful shikigami that u can use a limited amount of times daily to beat hard chapters/evo/soul zones, etc etc... if ur looking for a mentor i recently finished an apprenticeship w someone so im free to help out if ur interested ^__^ (my user is @.sneer [all lowercase] if u didnt already know hehe)
join a guild if you havent already! i tihnk it prompts you to join a guild when u first start playing i dont rmbr but a couple things to rmbr.. one. if ur guild has ‘15gq’ ‘100gq’ in its notice, gq means guild quest and u like.. HAVE to do those or else theyll kick u from the guild.. u can find the guild quests by going to ur guild, clikcing the shrine tab on the bottom right, and where it says GROUP QUESTS thats it! usually theyre basic things like submit grade four souls or evo materials but u shld definitely stack up on evo materials and souls so u dont run out.. so if ur guild says 100+gqs.... i wld suggest leaving that guild for a lighter gq guild.. 100+gq guilds are like.. big bad guilds who wanna rank in the top ten soo save urself the trouble.... TWO. ur realm! ur realm comes w ur guild so if ur kicked u cant access ur realm :( i think u already know what ur realm is and what it does so i will just say .. fuse ur low level realm cards.. SAVE UR DRUMS REALM CARDS.. if its a 1*, fuse it but if its 3*+... save that bad boy..
speaking of jade... SAVE IT.. jade and mystery talismans r like GOLD.. theyre rlly easy to get in the beginning of the game but they start getting super scarce when ur lvling up and r completing achievements.. usually when u get ten mystery amulets or 1k jade ur gonna think “oh what if i get an ssr out of this summon ooh” YOU WILL NOT.. this game HATES ur ass it hates u so much it hates ME it hates EVERYONE except lvl 60s who get new ssrs and shit on their first summon... ennieway.. random chance up events r stupid scams but chance up events featuring new shikigami are not... like the one thats going on right now for sp aoandon.. these r good events... random chance up events coming up out of no where is just netease being like ‘buy more jade we want ur money ugly idiot... stupid lmao’.. so yeah hoard ur amulets and jade AH ALSO IN THE MALL go to the mall and go to GENERAL.. youll see a package that says smth like 5 daily jade or smth that costs 666 jade.. BUY THAT itll give u 5 jade daily everyday.. it also stacks up so if ur not online for a couple days u wil be swimming in it baby...
oh god what else... click ur scroll on the bottom right and at the end next to collection youll see a tab that says TEAM.. thats a very useful helpful tab bc if u ever need help or want to join in on someone elses team for loot this is where u go.. when i started playing and i was farming for hiyoribo shards i always went to the system chat and clicked rlly fast on the hiyoribo shard zone hoping i cld get in ... i did that up until i was in my lvl 40s .. ur prbly smarter than me and alreayd know abt this tab but just felt like i needed to mention it just in case.........
SHARDS... if u get enough shards u can form a summoning pact w that shikigami.. demon seals are little side quests that pop up after youve completed a chapter/exploration and they come up randomly with a handful of different shikigami... but you can also access all of the demon seals from the TEAM tab i mentioned above.... demon seals only have a handful of shikigami though not all of them so dont expect to see like ssr demon seals lol also  some of the shikis u can farm from demon seals are VERY good.. ill touch on this later.. DEMON PARADE is another good way to collect shards.. in ur courtyard, click the town sign and the demon parade sign shld be the first thing u see! demon parade, unlike the demon seals, are chance thing, u might get the shards u want or u might not.. its kinda stupid... throwing beans around and shit.. itll give u a lineup of three shiki that u can choose from, if u hit the shiki u picked u get extra shards.. u might see some shiki in the parade w little lanterns over their heads, that just means they give more shards too nothing special
SHIKIGAMI... when ur looking at all of ur rare and sr shikigami ur probably thinking “this sucks these r all USELESS i want ssrs and sps >:(” well akchually... some of the best shiki in the game (for beginners especially) are rares and srs... shouzu (r), kamaitachi (sr), and hiyoribo (sr), are all farmable shikigami u can get from demon seals, if u havent summoned them already! yamausagi, a shiki u will see a LOT, is also a very easily summonable shiki so dont throw her away.. if u have duplicates of the same shiki u can PROMOTE THEM and it will level up one of their skills, just like a skill daruma! (DONT waste ur skill darumas they are soo valuable.. only use them on the shiki u use the most and want to lvl up skills on).. lvling up the skills on ur shiki increases their power and adds perks and makes them over all.. very sexy..
EDIT: added in this list of easy farmable beginners shikigami that u want to keep and build (refer to list BENEATH this one for list of roles)
kujira (sr) support
yamausagi (r) puller
shouzu (r) unique/shield **DEMON SEAL**
hiyoribo (sr) healer/revive **DEMON SEAL**
kusa (r) healer/dps
samurai x (r) cc
momo (sr) healer/revive
ushi no toki (r) unique
kamikui (r) pusher
oitsuki (sr) orbs
komatsu (sr) cc
kamaitachi (sr) puller **DEMON SEAL**
all shikigami have a certain role and its very important u know which shiki is which bc sometimes if u use them wrong u can mess up ur entire team.. here are all of the roles and some shiki examples:
dps: dps stands for ‘damage per second’ but it can also be used as a noun to describe a shikigami that is damage focused (ex. kuro mujou, momiji, hangan, mio)
cc: stands for ‘crowd control’. ccs have the ability to limit the number of enemies actively fighting during an encounter giving u the advantage (ex. enma, yuki onna, yumekui, samurai x)
pusher: pushes the enemies move bar back, giving u the advantage of going first (ex. kamikui)
puller: basically the same thing as pusher. pulls the ally move bar forward (ex. kamaitachi, yamausagi)
shield: shiki that provides a shield of some sort to protect allies without the use of souls (ex. ichimokuren, shiro)
heal: self explanatory (ex. sakura, hana)
revive: healer types with the ability to revive players w a cooldown. not all healers are revives (ex. hiyoribo, momo)
support: self explanatory.. supports allies (ex. miketsu, kujira, bake-kujira)
unique: shiki w unique abilities that cant be placed under labels (ex. hakuzosu, ushi no toki)
orbs: shiki that supply orbs to ur team (ex. aoandon, zashiki, oitsuki)
counter: shiki that counters after an enemy attack (ex. mannendake, vampire)
AND FINALLYYYYYY how to build ur shiki... while doing explorations u get free little souls.. in the beginning this will be ok since ur just starting off but actually each shiki has a perfect soul that makes them work the best.. now there are too many souls for me to actually list so as a parting gift to this entirely too long onmyoji cheat sheet, i will leave u this SHIKIGAMI BUILD GUIDE made by the nura clan.. it lists EVERY shikigami w the perfect soul for them, what role they play, and how to build them.. i touched on their roles a little bit above but i cldnt list everything so heres this.. i use it like everyday when building new shiki its sooo helpful
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1zZoMPfuA1plomt6Kq077Q9CZ3mD_0ThYzF_tIUyf28M/edit#gid=824193257
ANYWAY.. I TIHNK IM DONE.. I HOPE THIS WASNT A COMPLETE UNINTELLIGIBLE MESS... if u need clarification for anything pls ask i feel like i mashed up a bunch of words together and called it a day.. ummmm so yeah :) theres probably..... stuff... i might be missing but if theres smth specific u want to know about JUST ASK!!!!!!!!! im always looking for new omj friends...
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alittleemo ¡ 4 years ago
Note
12 16 17 💗💗
hi clara, how are you? forgive me this is mildly incoherent bc im tired but wanted to finish it anyway so here’s me still having no plan for my skam lmao
12- what’s something that people on tumblr would scream about in each season?
season one- everytime Eva is a badass bitch, honestly. When me and my friend talked about it, we agreed she would probably fight with Chris P before Jonas did in the ‘awkward’ scene, and she’s also just a genuinely hilarious person.
season two- i still have no plan for what season two will be (don’t even ask about my noora i just have no responses) but if i go a skam Brighton route and have my season two focus on Kira’s story (Vilde), it would probably be the girl squad doing some absolutely bonkers type stuff like the time Kira lost her shoes when we were walking home in the rain and me and my friend almost collapsed on the sidewalk bc we were laughing so hard about this tall kid walking into a tree branch. Yk, good squad vibes (we are ABOUT that sweet sweet friendship here babey!!!)
season three- oh god im still terrified about how this season would be received and i should probably talk to someone about it but I’d say the hotel scene (the aftermath really) would make tumblr go WILD
season four- again please stand by, i have no idea what’s happening this season + i rlly should talk to my friend before i start this (im not sure how to approach anyone about this tbh which is one of my biggest problems bc i dont want anyone to be offended or take it the wrong way or uyyyy). however Fatimah (Sana) is a gem so it would prob be something rlly sweet with her and her Yousef or just her popping off on someone since she’s usually a pretty chill person
16- Are there any cheating storylines? Are there any love triangles?
i don’t really like cheating storylines, this sounds dumb but like they make me kinda sad?? if possible I’d love to remove that from season one but im not rlly sure i can do that without wildly revamping it and im not sure im up to that. oof love triangles?? yeah probably we’re all about that unrequited love over here (i think im getting delirious i need sleep) oh in one of the first drafts X was gonna be in love with Y and Z but i cant give yall names bc it was just a manifestation of me having crushes on too many people
17- how is mental illness represented in your remake?
I’ve based most of the characters off of people I know irl, usually my friends who I’ve interviewed to some extent about what they’re okay with/want to include. One of my friends, who I am basing my Vilde character off of, has some underlying mental struggles and her season would definitely go into depth about that and her family’s reaction to it; I will not say too much to respect her privacy, but it would go into some depth about Asian American parents and mental illness, which I may interview another friend about too. A lot of my characters have mental illnesses as well- Robbie (my Isak/Cris?) for example has ADHD, another character has autism, many of Bonnie’s acquaintances have mental illnesses. my goal is to be as respectful as possible and try to do a lot of research to make sure i dont fuck anything up (and ill prob need a beta reader if this ever gets written (which considering how fucked the mcu timeline is who even knows))
y���all i literally have no plan beyond half of s1 and half of s3 like i wish i had more brain cells to spare but thanks for forcing me to think clara <3 (also sorry if this is really bad? let me know if anything seems really wrong)
Skammaker asks pt. 3!!
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sapphichalo ¡ 4 years ago
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okay artists: one dee, hayley kiyoko, halsey, wallows, olivia o’brien (i went to high school with her), and king princess; albums: golden hour, fine line, folklore, and calm if u listen to 5sos (i cant rmbr fjcjcj); songs: the less i know the better by tame impala, heaven falls/fall on me by surfaces, pink + white by frank ocean, crzy by kehlani, and dang! by mac miller
This is literally gonna take me like 20 min but thank you darling!
One Direction
Favourite song: Top 3 are IICF, Home, and What A Feeling
Least favourite song: Gotta Be You, Na Na Na, Love You Goodbye, according to that sorting thing
Favourite album: MITAM or Four i cant decide
Least favourite album: Up All Night in terms of actually being good, but I think my actual least favourite is Midnight Memories cause UAN is full of bops
Song that got me into them: WMYB babey, ive been around from the start
Seen Live?: Yes Ma’am, the Take Me Home tour in Auckland
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Im gonna put everything else under the break cause this bitch is gonna be long
Hayley Kiyoko
Favourite song: Cliffs Edge currently, its so gooood
Least favourite song: honestly dont listen to alllll of her stuff so i dont have one
Favourite album: Expectations
Least Favourite album: I also havent listened to Im too sensitive for this shit yet, so thats on the to do list
Song that got me into them?: uhhhh I think it was girls like girls
Seen live?: Sadly no :((
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Halsey (I like her stuff but i dont know much of it yet)
Favourite song: Finally // Beautiful Stranger or You Should Be Sad
Least favourite song: I dont really have one!
Favourite album: Maniac I think
Least favourite album: dont have one
Song that got me into them: New Americana or Colors
Seen Live?: Not yet!
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Wallows 
Hadnt heard of them!
First song youtube took me to: OK
First impression: surprised that dude is in a band, long song intro, like their sound
Do I like it?: Yeah!
Would I listen to them more?: Definitely!!
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Olivia O’Brian 
Hadnt heard of her either but shes hot
First song youtube took me to: Just A Boy
First impression: Hot, Dua Lipa vibes, into it
Do I like it?: very much so
Would I listen to them more? absolutely
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
King Princess (Would die for her)
Favourite song: has to be Talia, but also her Happy Together cover is so fucking good, and also Holy
Least favourite song: dont have oneeee
Favourite album: Cheap Queen
Least favourite album: dont have oneeee again
Song that got me into them: Pussy Is God, such a good song
Seen live?: No, but I deserve to
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Golden Hour (I fuck hard with this album)
Opinion on cover design: Stunning, she looks amazing, couldve had more yellow, 9/10
Favourite song: Slow Burn or Space Cowboy
Least Favourite song: Lonely Weekend, I dont love how it starts which makes it hard for me to listen to 
Underrated track: Happy & Sad
Overrated track: I dont think there is one, theyre all such lovely songs
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Fine Line (I think this might be my all time favourite album)
Opinion on cover design: Love, wish harry was a lil closer, and also I kinda wish it wasnt black around the outside, idk why 8/10
Favourite song: Fine Line, then She, then Golden
Least Favourite: TPWK, Cherry, and Falling, but I love all three of them, thats just how theyve been ranked
Underrated Track: Canyon Moon - hes so happy and it makes me cryyyyy
Overrated Track: I would say Falling, its still so good but the hets really got hold of it 
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Folklore (wasnt planning on listening to it but I did for you)
ok first thots, i like the 1, I also like that shes swearing, thats fun. looks like this album is pretty gay, idk
Opinion on cover design: artsy, simple, into it, 8/10
Favourite song: i have only listened to two so far but im enjoying both of them
Least favourite song: cant say yet, i heard a bit of seven and didnt love it but ill let you know
Cant say for overrated and underrated yet
Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 but this is based off of three songs
CALM (would also die for this album)
Opinion on cover design: Big fan, love the grungy vibes, they all look beautiful, 9/10
Favourite song: No Shame and Lover of Mine
Least favourite song: Best Years
Underrated Track: High
Overrated Track: I think they all deserve the hype
 Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
The Less I Know The Better - Tame Impala
couldn’t finish it | not my thing | it’s fine | could get into this | ooo i like | oh hell yeah | fuck this is some good shit | there aren’t even words, this transcends words
Heaven Falls / Fall on Me - Surfaces (this was a good rec, thanks babe)
couldn’t finish it | not my thing | it’s fine | could get into this | ooo i like | oh hell yeah | fuck this is some good shit | there aren’t even words, this transcends words
Pink + White - Frank Ocean
couldn’t finish it | not my thing | it’s fine | could get into this | ooo i like | oh hell yeah | fuck this is some good shit | there aren’t even words, this transcends words this song is so fucking good oh mmy god
CRZY - Kehlani
couldn’t finish it | not my thing | it’s fine | could get into this | ooo i like | oh hell yeah | fuck this is some good shit | there aren’t even words, this transcends words
Dang! - Mac Miller
 couldn’t finish it | not my thing | it’s fine | could get into this | ooo i like | oh hell yeah | fuck this is some good shit | there aren’t even words, this transcends words
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mattygraygubler ¡ 5 years ago
Text
our campus: chapter 8 (tom holland fic)
summary: frat!tom and reader go to the same college and y/n is tasked with being his tutor, they don’t really get along at first (because i love reader and tom hating each other trope)
warnings: drinking, drinking, more drinking, mentions of sex
word count: 2.6
a/n: sort of a cliff hanger at the end???? we’ll see what happens! 
as always texts are bolded
for a list of characters click here
to be added to the tag list send me an ask !
masterlist
✰✰✰✰✰
You slowly opened your eyes and were immediately confused. You were in your room, but you felt someone’s arms around you. 
You drank almost an entire bottle of wine last night, so needless to say, you didn’t really remember anything. You didn’t think you slept with someone… But did you? 
The body groaned, but you still couldn’t figure out who it was because the lights were off and blackout curtains closed. You pushed their shoulder a bit and heard a british voice say “Whaa?” 
“Tom?” You asked incredulously. 
“Good morning, darling,” he said. His voice was raspy and low, so incredibly sexy. 
“What are you doing here? Why are you shirtless, where are my pants?! Did we- ohmigod tell me we didn’t…” 
“You don’t remember?” He asked and you shook your head, still very aware that his arm was around you and your legs were intertwined. “Relax, we didn’t have sex, love. We just hung out and then watched a movie and fell asleep.”
“Then where’s your shirt?” He laughed. 
“You’re wearing it. You were cold and wouldn’t let me leave the bed, so I gave it to you.” You bit your lip, very uncomfortable. It was one thing to sleep with someone and not remember it, but to spend the entire night cuddling? You weren’t a couple, who does that?!
“Oh. I’m sorry.” You said and sat up, untangling your body from his.
“What are you apologizing for?” He asked. 
“I mean… I’m your tutor, we’re just becoming friends, it’s weird for us to-to sleep in the same bed together and-” 
“Y/N, slow down. We’re friends. It’s really not a big deal, totally platonic. I mean, c’mon, you’ve never slept in the same bed as Kyle? Or Emily?” 
“No, I have…” “Then what’s the big deal?” He asked. 
“I guess there isn’t one…” You replied. Tom swung his leg over the side of the bed, stretching and getting his stuff together. You couldn’t help but watch his back muscles flex when he stretched. You wanted to run your fingernails along it. 
“I gotta take care of some stuff, I’ll see you later today?” He asked. You nodded. 
“Sure, I’ll see you later. Wait, Tom!” You said before he could walk out the door.  
“Yes?” He turned back to look at you. 
“You’re, uhm… You need your sweatshirt back.” You started to take it off. 
“I’m only going down two floors. You look comfy anyway.” He said and smiled at you before walking out. 
You lied back down in bed, picking up your phone and checking the alerts. You scrolled through all the drunk texts from last night, laughing at a lot of them. 
♡girly girls♡
Em
GUYS
Al
whaaaaaat em
Em
GUYS GUYS GUYS
Iz
em what happened
Em
NOTHING HAPPENED
YET
CHECK THE WEATHER REPORT
You rolled your eyes and checked the weather report, unsure of what she was referring to. It was the first weekend in February, so you weren’t expecting your weather app to show you a 100% chance of snow starting in a few hours and lasting until Monday night. 
Em
THATS RIGHT LADIES
SNOOOOOOWWWW DAAAAYYYYYY
Al
Y/N we’ll be over at 9 to play games, iz you and i are goin to grab the booze, em youre in charge of food
You
what am i in charge of? 
Al 
dont you have homework? plus were using your room, we can take care of all the stuff
Iz
are we inviting anyone else?
Em
thank you for asking i would love to invite harrison
Iz
im fine with that if i can invite cal
Cal was the nerdy boy from delt who Isabelle was seeing. It was really low key, they’d only gone on a few dates, and things hadn’t gotten physical yet. 
Em
Y/N! invite tom and we’ll make it a total delt nite !!!
You
yeah ok ill invite him. were gonna be studying anyway. 
Al
wow i expected more push back
You
were friends now, it wont be weird. its not like its a quintouple date
Iz
it is if one of those delt boys has a gay sister
Al
not interested. besides i doubt more than 7 people can fit comfortably in Y/N’s room
You
fine ill see you guys tonight.
You hopped in the shower, putting on a pair of leggings and a cropped sweatshirt. You decided to text Tom. 
You
hey so it looks like its gonna snow i was wondering if we could work at my place instead?
also ive been told to invite you to our game night tonight
Tom
interesting, because i was already invited
what took you so long Y/L/N?
You
sorry i was in the shower
Tom
likely story
but yeah that sounds great ill see you in a few hours
A few hours. That’s plenty of time for you to put your glasses on, earbuds in, and really focus on your homework. 
* * *
You were pulled from your law reading by a knock at the door. You opened it, seeing Tom in a soccer tee shirt and gray sweatpants. His hair was wet and he ran his fingers through it. 
You hoped he didn’t see the fact that you bit your lip, but you couldn’t help yourself. He just looked so incredibly sexy. 
“You look... “ His eyes scanned your body and you immediately wrapped your arms around you, insecure. 
“What?”
“No, you just never wear stuff like this in front of me. You’re always so put together.” 
“Your point?” 
“You look cute, that’s all.” Tom said and walked into the room. He thought you were cute? No, you needed to calm down, he’s the biggest player ever, he didn’t mean anything. Just some accidental flirting. 
“I brought tequila, Harrison said it’s your favorite.” He said and dropped his backpack on the floor and put the tequila on the table where you kept your booze. 
“That’s sweet of you, thank you, it is my favorite.” “Really? I thought he was joking.” “No, why?” 
“You’re just… you’re really something else, Y/N.” He said with a laugh. 
You grabbed your notebooks and started the session, you checking his homework, him redoing the mistakes, and you answering any questions he had about the material. 
“You’ve definitely made an improvement,” you said as you finished reading his essay on the power shifts in England from the 1600s to today. 
“Thank you? I think?” 
“You’re welcome. You’re almost there, but you’re still not incorporating this source correctly.” 
“That’s because that source makes no sense. The writing is so convoluted, it’s mental!” 
“Then why don’t you find a new source?” You asked. 
“Well… I thought I’d be easier if I just stuck with this one.” Normally you would have rolled your eyes at that, but instead you found yourself laughing. 
“Read it again,” You said and handed him the library book he was using as his last source, “And if you still can’t understand it, I can explain it or we can just find a new source.” 
You grabbed your own book, Rage Becomes Her, which you were reading for your Women, Politics, and Public Policy class, and started highlighting right where you left off. 
You both got lost in your books, highlighting and annotating in silence. Every once in a while Tom would stop to ask you about a particular passage. 
It was another hour or so before you both heard a knock on your door. You got up to open it, and as soon as you did Emily burst into the room, Harrison right behind her holding three pizzas. 
“TOM!” Emily said and tackled him in a hug. “It’s so good to see you again!” “I didn’t realize you two had met,” you said and helped Harrison with the pizzas. 
“Just once,” Tom said with a laugh. He made himself comfortable on your bed instead of the floor, Harrison took a seat on your comfy chair and Emily made herself comfortable on his lap. 
“I better leave this unlocked,” you said. “I would offer you guys a drink, but Isabelle and Ally are-” 
“Did someone say something about a drink?” Isabelle said, pushing the door opened. 
“What’s up bitches,” Ally said and put a bottle of wine, svedka, prosecco, and a 30 on the booze table. 
“How long do you guys anticipate this storm lasting, because that is a LOT of booze for 7 people,” you commented. 
“Lighten up, babe, it’s not like we have to drink it all tonight.” Isabelle responded. 
“Better to be safe than sorry.” Ally said with a mischievous grin. They greeted the others in the room when you heard a knock on your door. 
“I heard there was a party happening here?” Cal said as he pushed open the door. You closed it all the way behind him so no one else could stumble in. 
After everyone introduced themselves to each other, Harrison said “So what does everyone want to play first?” 
“Oh, you’re new.” Ally said. “See, we kinda of have an agenda.” “Is that so?” Harrison asked. Emily kissed his cheek. “Tell me more.”
“Well the first time we had a snow day, we took turns picking our favorite games, and then we just stuck with that formula. First is A which means kings,” Isabelle said. “Then Emily, which means never have I ever. Then me, which means truth or dare. And then Y/N.” 
“And what does Y/N pick?” Tom asked.
“Y/N picks poker, of course. But most of the time were too drunk to get there.” Ally said. 
“Yeah I really got the short end of the stick there. It’s a good formula, though.” You replied and grabbed a deck of cards and a beer. 
“Let’s go, boys and girls.” You said. Everyone sat in a circle, the beer in the middle like you were worshipping it, and you spread out the cards in a circle around it. You saw Tom and Harrison exchange a look across the circle. 
“Something wrong?” You asked. 
“Well… Don’t judge us, but we’ve never played this game before. They don’t have it in England.” Everyone else laughed quietly at Harrison’s statement. 
“It’s easy. Everyone picks a card, and each card has an action assigned to it. Ace is waterfall,” You said. 
“Two is you, so you pick someone to drink.” Isabelle said.
“Three is me, so you drink.” Cal said as you went around the circle explaining the rules. 
“Four is floor, so the last person to slap the floor loses.” Emily said. 
“Five is guys,” Ally said. 
“Six is chicks,” You said and the circle started again. 
“Seven is heaven, so last person to touch the ceiling drinks.” 
“Eight is date, so you pick someone and whenever one of you drinks the other has to too, for the rest of the game.” 
“Nine is rhyme, so you go around the circle saying words that rhyme and the person who can’t continue the rhymes drinks.” 
“Ten is categories, so it’s the same as nine but with a category of something, like animals.” 
“Jack is never have I ever.” 
“Queen is questions, so the next person who answers a question they ask drinks.” 
“And finally, king is the ruler, so you make a rule that everyone has to follow until the next king is pulled.” 
“Make sense?” You asked. 
“Not one bit.” Tom responded. 
“You’ll get the hang of it, I promise it gets easier.” You said. “Al goes first.” 
“Why?” Harrison asked. 
“Gay goes first.” The four of you said in unison. The boys looked scared. They had no idea what they had gotten themselves into. 
“One last rule. First drink is a shot of your chosen poison. After that, you can drink whatever you want.” You explained as Isabelle gave each person a shot glass and the handles of hard liquor were passed around.
“Four,” Ally said and everyone slapped the floor except Tom and Harrison. Harrison realized first, so you watched as Tom downed the shot across the circle. He tensed his jaw after, which made you wet already. When he saw you looking at him, he winked at you.
Your turn was next, so you quickly pulled a card, a six, so you and the other girls did your shots and then began to pour yourselves your chosen drinks. For you, that was a second shot of tequila and then a rum and orange soda.
“Two.” Isabelle said with a grin. “I choose our kings sponsor, miss Alexandria Park.” Everyone whooped as Ally dramatically took a sip of her beer. 
“Five,” Cal said. The boys took their shots, except Tom who took a sip of his beer. 
“My turn then?” Tom said and drew a card. “Eight. Which one is that?” 
“Date. You pick someone and for the rest of the game whenever one of you drinks, the other has to too.” Cal explained. Tom looked around the circle, but you already suspected who he was going to pick. 
“Y/N,” he said. “Would you care to be my date?” 
“You’re exhausting, Holland. What, are you trying to get me drunk or something?” That shut him up, right as Harrison said ‘seven’ and everyone reached for the ceiling except Tom, who groaned and complained about having to drink again. 
Cal was the one who finally popped the beer and had to chug it. You put the cards to the side and everyone held up ten fingers, already ready for never have I ever. 
Things started off innocent enough, with Emily sharing that she had never peed in a pool. By the time you all went once and it was Harrison’s turn, he made things more interesting. 
“Never have I ever slept with more than 15 different people.” You and Tom were the only ones who clapped. 
Harrison rolled his eyes. “Jesus fucking christ, it’s like you guys were made for each other.” He commented. Your face got red, which Emily noticed, so she went quickly next. 
You finally lost, getting rid of your ten fingers before anyone else. You were always a bag of secrets, and Tom found himself learning more and more things about you he didn’t know. Like that you had a tattoo, or that you’ve gone skinny dipping, or that you’ve never had a gin and tonic. 
You were all wasted, that was clear. Isabelle was in between Cal’s legs on the floor, leaning her back against his chest. Ally was lying on the couch all by herself, upside down. Harrison was in your big chair with Emily on his lap, and you and Tom were on your bed, you lying on your stomach and him sitting against the headboard. 
“Isabelle, truth or dare?” Cal asked. 
“Dare,” she said, looking back at him. 
“I dare you to ditch your friends and come back to my room with me.” He said. 
Isabelle shared a look with all of you before saying “Sorry guys, I’m not one to turn down a dare.” They grabbed the half-drunk bottle of prosecco on their way out. 
“Al, truth or dare?” Emily asked. This went on until Ally passed out from drinking, still upside down. 
“We’ll get her home.” Harrison said. He picked Ally up as Emily collected their stuff and bid you and Tom good night. You both sat in silence for a few minutes, when Tom’s phone lit up. 
“Do you mind if I chill here for a while? I’ll stay on the couch if you want to go to sleep, but Harrison just said him and Emily want some alone time and her roommate is home.” 
“Of course, I don’t mind.” You responded. You stumbled off the bed, going to pour yourself another drink. 
“Ok, Y/N.” Tom said, moving so he was sitting on the edge of the bed. “Truth or dare?” You turned to look at him and saw a dark look in his brown eyes. 
“Dare.” 
“I dare you to kiss me.” 
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k-drabblings ¡ 5 years ago
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only then (pt. 5)
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KIM JIWON (BOBBY) X READER Type | Genre: badboy au | fluff/angst Word Count: 1663 A/N: I thought this was much longer than 1.6k words... Guess not.  Also I do update very very slow, I know. It’s mostly because I have no idea what to write next, and I don’t want to write nonsense. So thank you for your patience. I hope this doesn’t disappoint!  To be honest, it feels a little weird to write about Hanbin after the huge scandal, but it felt weirder leaving him out of the story after including him in the beginning.
Also wtf happened to line breaks? Why is that not an option anymore? This sucks.
part one two three four
Jiwon looked at the well healed scar on his arm fondly, running his finger along the raised ridge. His smile couldn’t help but widen as his phone buzzed. 
[23:22] y/n: i can’t sleep [23:22] jiwon: y? [23:22] jiwon: cause ur too excited to be talking to me? [23:23] y/n: ... zzz ...  [23:23] y/n: o look i fell asleep
He chuckled. Within a matter of days, teasing had already become part of their regular banter. So cute.
[23:23] jiwon: ...  [23:23] jiwon: do u think ur funny or something bc let me tell u rn that u r not [23:23] jiwon: boooooooo [23:24] y/n: if im so unfunny then y r u texting me hmm HMM??? [23:24] jiwon: cause i pity u [23:24] y/n: ...  [23:24] y/n: GOODNIGHT
Even though he knew was joking, his fingers still quickly scrambled to reply. 
[23:24] jiwon: im just kidding!! [23:24] jiwon: ur funny sometimes [23:24] jiwon: a little bit [23:24] jiwon: real little [23:25] y/n: then go talk to ur other super exciting and funny friends y dont u [23:25] jiwon: now dont be jealous [23:25] jiwon: the more time u spend with me the more exciting and fun u become [23:25] y/n: ive only seen u like 3x [23:25] jiwon: thats y ur so not funny
His finger hovered over the keyboard, wondering if he should type out the next line. He knew it was probably a bad idea, but he couldn’t help himself. Fuck it. He firmly pressed the upward arrow.
[23:26] jiwon: so i guess we’ve come to the logical conclusion that we should hang out more [23:26] y/n: i guess we have
You felt bold as you sent that last message. Was this considered flirting? You hadn’t known that your heart rate could increase so much within a mere 4 minutes. The past few nights had consisted of increasingly witty and teasing messages - messages that got your heart racing, your face flushing, and your imagination going a little crazy. Nothing even close to romantic had happened between you and him, and yet your ridiculous mind was coming up with possible scenarios that could maybe (just maaaybe) happen in the nearby future. You felt like an silly high schooler again, getting too easily excited over someone you barely knew. You didn’t even know how exactly how old he was or what he did for living. 
But all those unanswered questions just made you more excited - kind of like a good mystery book you just didn’t want to put down. 
[23:27]: jiwon: ok so whens ur next day off
Your breath hitched. You were off the upcoming Thursday, which was in 2 days. You hadn’t expected the next time you were going to see Jiwon to come so soon. You were used to seeing him like twice a month. You knew you could simply lie and give him your next day off, which was in a week or so, but you knew you didn’t want to wait that long.
[23:28] y/n: thursday [23:28] jiwon: ok cool so ill see u then [23:28] jiwon: and if ur busy... [23:28] jiwon: make yourself unbusy thanks
Your lips curled into a smile. How could someone this cute possibly be bad news? 
“You’re distracted, Hyung.” Donghyuk mumbled quietly so Hanbin wouldn’t hear. 
“Hm?” Jiwon murmured. “Nah, I’m good.”
Donghyuk’s eyes narrowed as he carefully tried to peer over Jiwon’s shoulder to see what was keeping him so preoccupied.  A girl’s name. He rolled his eyes. He was more than willing to bet that this was the same girl that had so nicely bandaged Jiwon up that rainy night. “Let’s keep outsiders... outsiders, okay, Hyung?” Donghyuk warned in a hushed tone.
Jiwon immediately shut off his phone screen and gave his younger friend a long hard stare. “I’m not fucking stupid, okay?”
And of course, despite Donghyuk’s words, he still went to see her on Thursday. They met up later in the afternoon, mainly because he slept in well into the afternoon. Since he did his work mainly at night, his sleeping schedule tended to be slightly off. When he woke up, you were getting some errands done - groceries and such. That gave him some time to get dressed and ready - he wanted to look good for the first date.  This is a date right? He hadn’t made it explicitly clear, but he was hoping you were on the same page as he was.
He recalled the the other day that you had said you wanted to try this restaurant that you had seen on some celebrities eating on TV.  And since it was on the other side of Seoul Station, they could walk along Seoullo 7017 along the way. He supposed that would be a good, somewhat nice way to start the date.
And you were delightfully surprised at how much Jiwon had actually planned out. You wouldn’t say it aloud, but you had been expecting somewhat of a haphazard schedule of activities that randomly popped up into his mind. 
“You look cute.” You jokingly scowled. “Are you saying I wasn’t cute before?” He rolled his eyes and laughed. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.” He put his hands up defensively when he earned a playful punch to the arm. “Hey, you gotta appreciate my honesty, right?” He grinned. “No, but seriously. You should wear dresses more often.”
“Thanks,” you mumbled shyly, having always been slightly awkward at accepting compliments. You glanced down at your outfit. It was a pretty plain dress, but this was the most dressed up he had ever seen you. 
“Where’s the scar from - if you don’t mind me asking?” He asked, pointing to the mark on your forearm. If it hadn’t been for that scar, he probably would have never recognized you. “Nothing cool,” you responded. “Got it while I was helping out at the bakery a while ago. Hot stuff can do that to you sometimes, you know.”  He laughed. “See? You’re already getting funnier - thanks to me.”  You rolled your eyes exaggeratedly but couldn’t help but join him in laughter. 
You were sure he had a fair share of scars all over his body, and also exciting stories behind them. But you were reluctant to ask, afraid that it could ruin the lighthearted mood.
The rest of the evening went by in a blur - partially because Jiwon had convinced you to share a bottle of soju with him during dinner. ‘You can’t enjoy pork belly without soju!’ he had insisted.  You had initially refused, being worried that you might end up blabbering and saying something stupid or embarrassing. But Jiwon was one convincing young man.
But luckily the only embarrassing thing that slipped out was a, “Fine, you’re kinda cute, okay?” after he had pestered you about what you thought about him. And boy, did he enjoy that answer.
You were partially disappointed when the date ended with a simple hug. You probably would have thought he were moving too fast if he had gone in for a kiss, but by no means would you have refused. In fact, as much as you hated to admit it, you'd immediately have shut your eyes and puckered your lips.  But a long, warm hug was what you got tonight. And you weren’t complaining. "Thanks. Today was really fun,” you said with a warm smile.  “Okay, so when can we have fun again?”
All of a sudden, you had something to look forward to every week. Every date with Jiwon was exciting. You got to experience thrilling things like ziplining, but even just sitting at a cafe and chatting got your heart pumping. You felt like your life had been recharged.  You had even bravely kissed him on the cheek when he had dropped you off at your door tonight. 
As Jiwon walked over to work after dropping you off, he heard a familiar voice calling his name. “Jiwon Hyung! Hyung!” Junhoe shouted from down the block. "Where’re you coming from?” He asked, frowning. Wherever Jiwon was coming from, it wasn’t from the direction of his home. Jiwon played it off vaguely. “Just was doing something. Don’t worry about it.” “Come on, tell me!” Junhoe whined. “Why’s it a secret, huh?” Jiwon pressed his fingers against his tall friend’s forehead and gave it a good shove. “Have you ever heard of a personal space? Look it up.” He couldn’t recall the last time anyone had made him so easily excited, and he wasn’t willing to part with you now.
His friends had also noticed that he was constantly in a good mood these past few weeks.  Donghyuk wasn’t too happy about it, but the others seemed to enjoy having a less moody Jiwon around. He wondered if Hanbin knew what Jiwon was getting himself into outside of work. But he didn’t want to tick off Jiwon, so he kept his mouth shut. A pissed off Jiwon was one scary man.
“How long do u plan on keeping this up, Hyung? It’s going to serve as a distraction to you and a danger to her. She doesn’t even know what you really do. If you tell her, do you think she’ll stay?” Donghyuk hissed. “Yeah, right.” “I know. I know.” Jiwon mumbled. This was like the fifth time he had approached him about this issue. He was thankful that Donghyuk hadn’t blabbed to the rest of the guys, but it was a disturbing reminder every time. Why was it so wrong to enjoy it while it lasted?
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dulharpa ¡ 5 years ago
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this is for hayley! @whistlingwillows a dear friend <3333
it’s meant to be a birthday present haha. i just want to shower you in love;;; so thought maybe i could go through as many of your fics and comment on them :^)))
(TO EVERYONE ELSE: please go to @whistlingwillows blog and read her fics!!! they are SO FCKIN GOOD AND AMAZING AND UGH HER MIND (it’s a lot of mcu and her bucky and steve fics are a*. i DEFINITELY RECOMMEND))
i wish you a VERY happy birthday and i hope we stay friends for many more years <3333333333 
i’m going through your masterlist heehee ;)))
ah first off, nice theme! i never could rlly see it before because i’m always on mobile heehee. also sorry for not reviewing them before??? i don’t usually read fics on tumblr as you’ve probably guessed;;
anyways, IM GON REVIEW THE SHIT OUT OF THESE >:DDDD
far from home -  bucky x stark sister!reader
firstly, i like how youre introducing the reader from buckys pov, like you can sort of already gather what shes like from them
‘Bucky can hear Tony’s soft inhale, feel the intensity of the man’s glare directed at Steve. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but a twitch of muscle would be enough to alert both men that he’s here. With the amount of tension crackling in the air, a brush against the wall would be equivalent to a thousand cymbals crashing in cacophony.’
IM CRYING ALREADY. the imagery in here is GLORIOUS. your tone here is so fitting! oo and the alliteration here is perfecto
ooooooo!! the backstory coming in  👀👀
‘despite what some people think that Steve and Captain America are two different personas, there will always be parts of Steve in the Avenger, and parts of the Avenger in Steve. They both want to believe in something good. They are, after all, one in the same.// Just as how Bucky and the Winter Soldier are the same man despite everything. HYDRA simply amplified the hate, fertilized the seeds of rage, curated the quiet thunder within his soul, within James Buchanan Barnes so that the Winter Soldier could thrive.’
yIKES! lol this is very character study like! nICE. it hurts tho, my poor children, i love you both 
oo ‘starlight eyes’ that is a very nice way of describing them
‘“Then what was London?” The protesters. “São Paulo?” The earthquake. “Vancouver?” Freezing cold water.//“Look, I care if Stark’s gonna run us over trying to find her. I care enough because she’s part of our team. Come off it, Steve. I know she can take care of herself. I’m gonna take a nap. Dr. Cho said no partying post-Singapore and what do you know, we throw the biggest party ever.’
ooo singapore uwu and london? (coincidence? haha jkjk) and the hints abt reader and buckys background are so good?? but so annoying??? like i just wanna KNOW yknow?? 
‘The water runs copper and the sting bites at his palm as he tries not to think. Tries to focus on the numbing cold that runs over his skin.’ 
your imagery is so vivid?? im actually in awe??? i am so regretful i havent kept reading your fics. like i know they are amazing, i just keep putting them off??? idk man. hopefully this makes up for it (gd tho, im still not done with commenting on one fic. this is what im doing with my motivation teehee ;)
‘ He feels weak. Tired. He wants to go back to bed but he also wants to stay out in the sun for a few hours more. The sun kisses his skin through the windows and he squints against the blue sky, wondering ‘
mood during this quarantine lol
‘“Oh, right.” Your voice is flat, uninterested, cold, as you stare at him. “You killed my parents.”Shit.‘
 OUCH LMAO THATS C O L D, O GOT +100 PHYSIC DAMAGE FROM JUST READING THAT
ooo robin as a nickname noice. very much gives me batman vibes lol
oh! and the way of doing the ‘flashback’ is neat! very original. it both tells us what happened AND buckys reaction to it again. he can re-analyse himself and reader. very cool
‘If you walk away now, don’t bother coming back!” Silence. Bucky can hear his own strained breathing, your soft sigh as you soaked in his ultimatum.’
👀👀 yikes that ultimatum. :// not good bucky. tbf theyre both trying to hurt each other but Yikes
eyy!!! readers pov!! finally! and the switch after we find out the outsiders pov? brilliant
oh no :(( more angst
‘When’s the last time you saw your therapist?”“Don’t have one. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”’ they BOTH need therapists;;;;
very good fic!!! :DD they rlly do hate each other! i definitely like how you went back and forth with the timeline! it gave me a v strong idea on what yn was like even before we rlly got introduced. i am now very curious on where reader is? i love your characterisations! 
i will read the 10k+ fics but heck the last one took me ages lolol (i will comment in the future tho!! i promise <3 ) (that took me over an hour jjhghgdjh)
slipping away- amnesiac modern bucky x reader
omg,,, AMNESIA! >:DDDDDD
‘ Put your fucking seatbelt on’
oh no, istg theyre going to have a car crash arent they (’ doesn’t put the seatbelt on to spite you.’ NO PLEASE PUT IT ON U DUMBASS)
ok,,,,, at LEAST he put it on before he got hit, thank heck. but still. youre so cruel to your poor characters lmaoo
oh gosh
‘You fall apart slowly, like pieces of you peeling away until you’re nothing more than your broken heart. The sobs that wrack your body are relentless and you shove your forearm into your mouth to muffle your cries. You want to bite into your skin. You want to distract yourself from the agony tearing you to shreds. You want to feel anything but the pain.///Tears sweep into your hair, cloud your vision and your whole face floods with heat as you try to breathe through the pain. You’re cleaved into pieces on that bed, eyes squeezed shut as the tears keep flowing, and your throat burns’
this hurts damn, it is so vivid?? i can really feel it 
i am so glad you got into writing yk?? so glad
NO PLS, TELL HIM. TELL HIM :((( ‘shes nice once you get to know her?? shes known nat for years now!! years!!
oh god ‘he looks younger without the burden of your time together’ this is so angsty omg
‘Well, he was stumbling through his apology and I just let him finish.” Your body fills with warmth as you remember his embarrassed smile, the way he shoved his baseball cap farther down his head, chin tucked to his chest, trying to hide that face. “When he was done, I opened my mouth to say something polite but what came out was ‘You look like someone I’d very much like to kiss’.”
this is so soft i stg im crying in the club
OH SHITTTTTTTTTTT , you left it off like that!!! thats so cruel!!!! i can’t!!! how dare you!!!! :””””””((( im typing this with tears in my eyes ill have u know!!
anyway!!! very good fic!! you could honestly make that into a longfic very easily lol. i felt too many emotions :(( 
i was just about to say where is the fluff!! where is it!! when i saw the next one and yay :))) pls i cant have more angsty stuff rn
.
cookies and rings and things bucky and reader
‘how much do you love me?’ ‘count the snowflakes, multiply by a million’
did you have to start the fic off with such a SOFT line? its so soft! so TENDER 
‘He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.’  jesus, the soft moments filled with love are the greatest <3
you can write fluff so well, whyd you have to pain me with all that angst ;””””) (1/10 hurt, 9/10 comfort is the way to go lolol) (jkjk ill read the angsty ones too when i have the spoons) (gonna reread that hydra steve one and ik thatll fuck me UP)
‘ Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are. ‘
you literally brought me to tears reading this softness, you have truly found my weakness
‘ She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst ‘
he already likes her so much! i can’t believe this is affecting me so much :’)
‘Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky’
this is so soft??? sam loves reader bc reader loves bucky sm. pls my hear <3333
you do fluff SO WELL DAMN 
‘F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission. ‘
yike bringing back that reminder oof
but thats so soft??? (i am def overusing soft but,,,,, i love it and the vibe) she sent him cookies! god i can feel the love  
‘She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.’
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 my hEART
you show how much they love each other in so many ways??? i am dying
“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.//”“What?”//Oh.Shit.
oh my god! i am literally tearing up!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!!
oh shit o am literally crying
your fluff got me crying harder than your angst i hope youre happy
I really hope you enjoy reading this?? i keep forgetting to like text you but i wanted to do something for your birthday. especially in quarantine when everythings gone crazy. one year i swear ill do something REALLY good for you. not making promises bc i hate if i dont. but ill like, learn how to podfic because you D E S E R V E  I T 
ive spent like three hours doing this lolol 
thank you so much for everything hayley!
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booknerdateen ¡ 5 years ago
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Halloween Book Recommendations!👻☠️🎃....Part 1
Hello, my loves!! If you saw my last post, then you know what’s coming. If not, let me tell you....I wanted to do a Halloween Book Recommendation post (long one) in the beginning of the month since it’s pre Halloween month-as I call it for right now. That didn’t happen for the last couple days because I was busy. But here we are! Now...be amazed of allllll the choices you got and even if some may not be your genre or type, that is okay!
📖 The Diviners Trilogy by Libba Bray
This series is one of my favorites...sadly I haven’t finished reading the 2nd book (Lair of Dreams), but with my Halloween binge I am planning on rereading and finishing it. This is 1920’s New York...nuff said. But anyways, we have different persoectives told in 3rd person (I have no idea which 3rd, cuz those I can’t remember for the life of me), who has abilities to see ghosts/future, etc... aka Diviners. Basically physics in other words. In the first one, they battle out this evil monster dude (which is creepy...the monster dude). Lair of Dreams deals with this mystery illness...I can’t say much for this one since I haven’t finished it yet. Before the Devil Breaks You is the 3rd and final book and I don’t know what that one is about.
The audiobooks-y’all do them-I have no comments. I read The Diviners physically (I didn’t really get into audiobooks till recently this year). I did try and listen to Lair of Dreams, but it wasn’t for me. i may give it another try, so no promises on this though. I have heard that they are really good, so hopefully they are as well for you.
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📖Stalking Jack the Ripper Series by Kerri Maniscalco
This series is one of my favorites! I’m gonna say that for so many here, but I love this one to pieces to where I preordered the 3rd book (Escaping From Houdini) and also the 4th and final one (Capturing the Devil. CTD is being shipped on the 10th this month (6 DAYS) from my Barnes and Noble location, so I don’t know if it will arrive that day or not.
Anyways, this series follows Audrey Rose Wadsworth in the late 1800s dealing with the Ripper murders. The second involves Dracula, third is Houdini, and the fourth is H.H Holmes. Yes, America’s first serial killer! Sorry, I’m very excited about that. Being a girl in the 1800s/1900s, you’re not really have much to live for. Audrey rather do things that guys can do (forensics in this case), then being at tea parties. I don’t blame you, girl! Then, Thomas Cressworth comes in as well and they both solves these crimes together with the help of Audrey’s uncle (a mortician). If that doesn’t get your interest, then Idk what will.
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📖Confessions Series by James Patterson
This series is more mystery than horror. I personally love James Patterson and he has always been one of my favorite authors. This one follows the Angel siblings after their parents’ mystery death (that mystery is the center of the first one (Confessions of a Murder Suspect). These siblings aren’t necessarily ordinary in some since. I don’t want to give away anything, but meds has the reason for that.
Tandy Angel (main character here) solves these murders/crimes throughout the books. The second one contains school murders (not shootings, thankfully) (Confessions: The Private School Murders). The third (Confessions: The Paris Mysteries) takes place in Paris, France. I have not read this one nor the 4th one (Confessions: The Murder of an Angel) so I don’t have any opinions on these ones. It is really good and if you’re a sucker for mysteries and James Patterson boos, then here you go!
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📖The Women’s Murder Club by James Patterson
Another Patterson series...I’m a sucker for them. At first, I had called this the Number series because I didn’t know what the series was called and the only thing I knew was that they have numbers in the title.
Meet Lindsay Boxer (main character), homicide inspector for San Fran; Claire Washburn, medical examiner; Jill Bernhardt, assistant D.A.; and Cindy Thomas, San Fran Chronicle writer. 4 amazing chicks who kick butt, form the Women’s Murder Club to solve these murders. Freakin girl power! The chapters are quite short, sometimes longer, but usually short, which if you’re good with that, then cool, if not, that’s okay! I’m pretty sure the latest book of the series published is the 17th one...maybe 18th....one of those two. These are the ones I currently have.
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📖The Merciless Series by Danielle Vega
If you love horror, possesion, all that stuff, you’ll love this series. I first discovered it on Facebook when the book trailer popped up. It was a interesting trailer and caught my tention. Couple years later, my senior year of high school, the book fair came (appears twice a year, this was the first appearance) and I had to buy it. It was $8 bucks, originally $10.99. If you are very religious, then maybe not this series. Lots of said people said its Mean Girls and the Craft mixed together.
The first two books follows Sophoa Flores as the main character. Sophia, being the new girl, befriends the 3 populare chicks (Plastics), who they want her to befriend this outsider (Brooklynn). Mean Girls basically but little bit reveresed. Then things happen. Spoilers, so I can’t really clarify it. Second is and it’s what the 2nd is also called....The Excorsim of Sophia Flores...DUN DUN DUNNNN. The third (Origins of Evil) is where Brooklynns story begins, so we know how Brooklynn became and what not. The 4th and final (The Last Rites) features a little bit of Sophia, but this main character is Berkley Hubbard, fresh out of rehab. Honestly, these books do scare me, but not like how when I watched the Conjuring the first time. Perfect read for Halloween season!
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📖Mrs. Peregrine Series by Ransom Riggs
Now, I have not been able to finish the dang first book, so Idk. From what I have read and remeber, it is really good! It’s kind of horro...I don’t particularly think it is, but others do. This has mixed media, mainly pictures, but fascinating ones! The four books follows Jacob Portman and his friends of peculiar aka they have abilities and their adventures they have. If you’ve seen the movis, then you understand what I mean. Ransom’s writing is one of my favorites and having pictures/media in them makes me happy. I am a visual person, so the pictures help me a lot.
Anways, the first book is where Jacob is in the peculiar world where the peculiars live in this never ending time loop of the same day, but they rewind time before bombs happen aka Poland in WW 2. I’ve heard so many amazing things of this series! Jesse the Reader (booktuber) LOVES this series and he will recommend it to the end of time.
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📖Visions Trilogy by Lisa McMann
These three books involve visions. If you have seen Medium (with Patricia...I cant remember her last name), then you will love Visions. They don’t involve any ghosts, so that’s a difference from Medium.
Here we have (Crash) Jules Demarco, who is seeing visions of this explosion everywhere. She realizes this explosion will happen very soon and she has to stop it before it happens. Not much, I know, but the next one (Bang) (sadly deals with a school shooting), her crush gets the visions this time. The third one (Gasp) has this random character who the two save last book ends up getting the visions then. This vision is a boat accident...a ferry to be precise, but nothing like Titanic...at least I don’t think so. This was a good series and really liked them. Easy to read in 1 day...unless y’all are busy and or a slow reader like me.
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📖The Asylum Series by Madeleine Roux
Horror, ghosts, random past lives stuff! I only have the first two books (Asylum and Sanctum), but I think there is a third and one or two novellas. I love these guys! You get some pictures and letters in the books, so cool!
Here is Dan Crawford, who is spending the summe at the New Hampshire College Prep program. Abby Valdez and Jordan (no last name was given) are his new found friends at the program. The catch of all this, the newly built dorms is where the Brookline Asylum used to be. The three friends uncover secrets of their pasts and families and such. It’s such a good series.
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📖The Twilight Saga by Stephanie Meyer
The infamous Twilight books. Y’all may have expected this or may not have. I do not have an opinion on this series just yet. I recently read Twilight for the first time and really liked it. That said, hopefully I will get to the other books and see where my opinions lie.
Everyone knows what this series is about, but if not, come to me. Isabella (Bella) Swan moves from the heat of Arizona (I feel you Bella) to the rainy world of Forks, Washington. There, she meets the Cullen siblings...mainly Edward...who happens to be vampires. Bella and Edward get closer and start dating and what not. Ah yes, the infamous woods scene where Edward is like “Say it!” to Bella, it actually happens in the car so casually. This series contains a love triangle of a human, vampire, and a werewolf.
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📖The Chronicles of Vladmir Tod by Heather Brewer...okay it’s formerly Heather, but it is now Zac Brewer
I love this series...even though I only read the first two books and a little bit of the 3rd one. If you love vampires...well half human half vampire then yessss! Half human, Half Titan....Half human, half ghoul....if y’all watch anime, then you probably get the two references. Okay...onto the synopsis!
Vladmir Tod is the equivalent of...dang it what is the word....ahhh disgrace cuz he is half human and half vampire. In the vampire world, humans and vamps dont go together. He is raised by his Aunt Nelly, who of course knows he is half vampire. His best friend, Henry also knows. Throughout 8th Grade to 12th Grade, he’s gotta deal with bullies and vampire slayers. What a hard knock life for this dude.
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mastrrt ¡ 6 years ago
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Me just trying to predict things Kung Fu Panda 4
Predicting the villain:
This is just some common sense stuff but I’ll say it anyways.
For species it’ll most likely be another animal native to China. Most likely not a feline, bird or bull since it would draw parallels to prior villains.
The main enemy will probably be female, as to break the series of male villains. They’ve done it to Shrek, with fairy godmother.
Dreamworks said, during the creation of Kai, “He cant go brawler, since Tai Lung was brawler. He cant go smarter, since Shen was smarter. Where can we go? You have to go supernatural, bigger, and even more intimidating.” Just like the Averngers franchise, there’s a constant law placed where the villains must get progressively stronger the more the series progresses. Without the villain getting stronger, there’s no conflict —or at least not enough conflict to top the lmovie before it. The villain in Kung Fu Panda 4 must be at least different from the other three villains, or attains two out of the three assets that make up for prior villains. For example, the villain can be both smart and supernatural. Or be a brawler and a smarty. I think particularly for this one, the villain would need to have supreme authority and immanent or supernatural powers. While Kai worked in solidarity in terms of mind, it might be possible that the next villain might actually be villains with one superior guiding over them (the main enemy Po will fight). A regime-styled cooperation, with a leader. Each person in the group is bound to have a one on one against one of the Furious Five. This way, the group can actually do something without compromising the relevance of Po since he’s still the one who’ll defeat the main villain.
In this light, what might be the conflict?
The problem is that Po is nearly a perfect character. Oogway said it himself: he is both sides of the ying and yang. To reach such equilibrium, the soul must be stable, and Po would have been ridden of all evil (check my mirror of yin and yang theory out if you havent already pls). This means that Po would have to break pretty darn bad on the next movie. Every story has a scene where it shows a character’s breaking point. But to break a character who’s both sides of the yin and yang... well, that character would have to put through a lot of hell. That’s why I believe someone’s gonna die in the fourth movie [insert Mr. Ping], or someone’s gonna be temporarily taken away from Po [insert Tigress]. And here’s another thing: the first movie is about body, the second is about mind, and the third is about spirit. What’s left? The heart.
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So... these are the core factors that make a human. Flesh is where the soul lives. Mind and heart is what makes a person. You know what heart means? Love. You what love mean? Either romance or family. Now the third movie was already a little bit about family, so does that means theres a little, you know, romance? You know. A certain Tigress that can make Po master the concept of heart. 😏 but in reality, I don’t think drreamworks will make Tigress hostage. It’s not enough catalyst for Po to break, unless they make it seem like Tigress died. And I just cant see it either... too cliche for a story so anticipated. It’ll make sense of Mr Ping would die.
It doesn’t necessarily mean someone’s gonna die though. But the internal conflict must have magnitude near beyond repair, and will damage his heart more than anything else.
What’s the settings?
They always try to change the settings. Valley of Peace. Then to Gongmen. Then to Panda Village. The valley was more a traditional chinese suburb of sorts. Gongmen was an industrial, probaby tech-savvy city. And the panda village was a playground. This one is unpredictable. They might start the movie of at the panda village instead of the valley (which is sad); they took the thousand mile bridge to Mongolia, so the panda village may border Mongolia. And that may mean they’ll travel upwards to the bordering country.
Will the movie fail?
The movie has been delayed till 2020. All three movies have above 80% in Rotten Tomatoes, which is extremely high for the website.
Shrek 3 was rated 48%, which is nearly half of the rating it earned in shrek 2 (89% —ok, not really nearly half but it’s a major dip!) Kung Fu Panda 3 was actually rated higher than KFP 2, which bodes well on the series’ consistency. Luckily (and unfortunately for dreamworks) this high rating perpetuates the pressure of making better kfp movies, to keep all the KFP movies clean And untarnished, to finish strong and not to taper at the end in quality like Shrek. They had four years to work on it. So we’re just sitting here pretty. Financially, the series is doing phenomenal.
But something else worries me. KFP 3 was waaaay to kid friendly for the series. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a childrens show. But a dark underlying plot lay deep in both 1 and 2. Heck. Kfp 1, Shifu lost a child. In kfp 2, implications of genocide. It seems kfp 3s light heartedness was a reimbursement for the darkness they placed in kfp 2. Hopefully, this big bane of appealing to the younger audience won’t negatively affect the deepness and the plot of the fourth movie. But with panda kids, with dim and sum, with mei mei, and with ling or whatever panda father Po has, I think that won’t be the case. If you compare kfp 1 and kfp 3, you could really see a huge difference in tone.
What will happen to the Furious Five:
Them failing after trying to fight the main villain without Po is to repetitive. It seems dreamworks likes it so that Po is the only one who defeats the villain, while the furious five just stands there and lets him skadoosh his way to da top. It’ll be nice, like I said, if they fought a group instead of just one villain. So that everyone has a share if villains, and Po can still take the main villain.
About Shifu and Tigress’s relationship. It’ll Also makes sense if Shifu would pass away, giving Po no choice but to accept full responsibility as the head of the Jade Palace and the teacher of the Furious Five. Or, it’ll also make kind of sense if Tigress is gone temporarily, making Shifu want to spend time with her. If kfp 4 is the last movie then their relationship would be mended. If kfp will really go up to the sixth, then theyll have to prolong the conflict because then there’s really no thread that keeps all the stories connected and make all the stories a one whole story. If they wanted the movies to essentially be a obe whole story, it would make sense if there’s a similar conflict transcending all films and wrapping at the end. With the rise of new characters, the furious will definitely have less screen time. ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️😠😠😡😞🙃
Anyways, these are just my predictions. What do you guys think would happen?
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ask-bolthead-crew ¡ 6 years ago
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Hey,really out of the blue,sorry,but do you have any tips how to keep drawing when im never even remotely happy with what i draw?I get the urge to draw something all the time but when i have a pencil in hand and a paper in front of me i just freeze,i get so terrified because i know its not gonna come out the way i want it to so i just dont,i dont draw anymore even though i want to,and i want to improve my art and do things but i just cant get over the wall. Sorry to bother, feel free to ignore
// So the first thing to remember is that you are DEFINITELY not the only one.Art is hard, especially when you're not happy with what you're doing. I feel that way a LOT. Another thing to keep in mind is that a bad drawing never killed anyone.Sometimes you have to make a schedule for yourself... one you get past those first couple of hurdles of thinking "this sucks," it becomes a lot easier.I'm not saying you have to be proud of everything you do. In fact, it's the complete opposite. For every good drawing you do, there will be about 100 fuck ups. There's this strange expectation we put on ourselves that everything we do has to be good, and honestly it's an unrealistic expectation.What you CAN do, however, is just get into the habit of forcing yourself to do it... even if it's just a few doodles a week.What I do is I have specific characters I'll doodle as a warmup... they're my go-to guys. Kid, Killer, Heat, and Wire are four of them... But I also have my own character, Muffler, that I'll use.These become go-tos for trying out new things or getting back into the swing of drawing. They're characters/things/whatever that you eventually feel comfortable enough drawing from memory and can draw anywhere.The biggest thing is creating a no-judgement zone for yourself. If you don't feel comfortable drawing, you won't. Simple as that. Once you allow yourself to mess up, or make some bad drawings, it becomes more like second nature. Every drawing you make is a step towards bettering your skill. Think of it as a tool, not a finished product. If you get frustrated, don't tear out the page and throw it away or scribble it out. Turn the page or go to a blank area and start again. Allow each drawing to breathe and exist, even if it looks like crap to you. You never know if it might spark an idea at a later point in time, and even if it doesn't, it becomes a record of how far you've progressed... and trust me, you want those.I understand how difficult letting go of that judgement can be. It's similar to writing- just allow yourself to vomit images onto a page first. Don't go into anything thinking, "This is the end-all-be-all, and will be a completed image." Life doesn't really work that way. I'll sometimes redraw sketches for asks three times before I finally go, "fuck it- good enough."The finished pieces will come later, and chances are you won't even recognize it when it's a solid work of art until like... a week after you force yourself to be done with it... especially because, as artists, we're forced to stare at the damn thing until we drive ourselves crazy.Learning when to call something done was also really difficult for me. What I started doing was, once I got to a point where I would make changes and then immediately erase them/try to fix them, I called it done. I'll leave you with something my mentor told me about a year ago:Art for me is not a passion. I don't LOVE making art. In fact, most of the time I'll look at something I've done and go, "wow this is garbage."Art is an addiction. I don't do it because I like it... I do it because I HAVE to. If I go too long without drawing, I feel physically (and mentally) ill. I get depressed and restless. It's these times when it's even harder to pick it back up again. Sometimes I wish I could be content working at a computer for a company. Unfortunately, that's just not how my brain is programmed.But sometimes you just get the strength to push through that block, and you will make some pretty incredible stuff eventually. It just a lot of mental gymnastics and a WHOLE lot of understanding and allowing yourself to make those 100 bad drawings before you make that one good one.You'll get there, I promise. It sometimes just takes looking at things from a different perspective.
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livingasaghost ¡ 6 years ago
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alright folks. settle in. this is the story of how i met taylor swift after waiting 10 years. whew.
i don’t honestly know how to start this bc i never thought i’d make this text post. 
so it all started on tuesday night. i was reading and scrolling my phone as one does, and then i get a text from hailee aka @ootwoodsyet aka my twin.
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taylornation sent her a dm and both of us FREAKED OUT. we were cautiously optimistic but i think both of us were like OKAY THIS IS IT! THIS IS WHAT WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR! EVERYONE STAY CALM IT’S ACTUALLY HAPPENING! so anyway, obviously hailee is the best person in the universe and replied putting my name in as her plus one and then we just texted each other non-stop for like two hours straight. tn replied to her email and asked for our social media handles, my full name, and our birthdays. we could hardly sleep that night, so when we woke up early the next morning we texted each other still freaking out. finally TN emailed back and was like OKAY YOU TWO ARE ON THE GUEST LIST! HAILEE LITERALLY FACETIMED ME FROM HER CAR AND WE BOTH LOST IT. at that point we immediately started making plans bc the next day thursday was the event in chicago. we had no idea when or where it was happening, but we knew we were going to be there. so we started prepping. i had to cancel on a client photoshoot (oops...but i’m not sorry) and uh hailee may or may not have had food poisoning that morning......so i went to platos closet and bought a new dress (velvet, blue, and PERFECT) and then i packed up a bag bc i was gonna go straight from my parents’ house to louisville on saturday for the rep show (wtf). neither of us slept very well wednesday night, and then AND THEN IT WAS TIME FOR THE WEIRDEST BEST DAY OF LIVES.
thursday june 28, 2018 --
i woke up at 7:15 and drove like 8 hours north from nashville to chicago. there was actually a decent amount of traffic that day but at one point i had to take a detour because there was a crash on i65. so on this random detour in southern indiana, a little ways outside of louisville, i was blasting better than revenge and i look to my left and I SAW TAYLORS FACE ON A TRUCK AND I SCREAMED BECAUSE THE REP TOUR BUSES WERE JUST SITTING IN THIS RANDOM LOT
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I THOUGHT IT HAD TO BE A SIGN AND UH I GUESS I WAS RIGHT???? i also passed a place called “swifty farms” (what) and of course i drove through taylorsville so um needless to say....it was all meant to be
i eventually made it to chicago at 5:30pm and i picked up hailee from the train station. we flipped bc we literally did this exact same thing less than a month about for the 2nd chicago show and HERE WE WERE AGAIN FOR THE SAME WOMAN soooo we made our way to the first location that TN said to meet at by 7pm. we pulled up at like 6:15 and the parking lot was full but they already had a line of people. after finding a nearby garage to park in, we literally RAN across the way to get in line (it was like 10 minutes and we were so sweaty wow) and then we were in line and we had to go through two different security sections - each one asked for our names and ids. then at the second checkpoint they gave us wristbands based on our ages (i’m over 21) and eventually we went off to give them our phones and bags and stuff. then we were directed onto a greyhound bus and when we got on we legitimately became the most obnoxious people i’ve ever known in my entire life.
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when we got on they were playing reputation (duh) and RFI was on so we literally listened through the album one whole time and it was WILD. we didn’t have our phones so we were just freaking out about twitter. we spent the whole time singing along and being totally in awe. the whole bus did 123 LETS GO BITCH during delicate, and thennn during getaway car when she goes SAID GOODBYE IN A GETAWAY CAR the bus MOVED AND WE LEFT TO GO TO THE SECONDARY LOCATION (john mulaney???)
so we drove until new years day came on and then we pulled into this random alley. before we could get up, this CAMERA crew showed up and went to the back of the bus to film us. they told us to be excited so we WERE?? and then we got off and went inside this random venue. hailee and i gripped each other’s hands so hard and then we went down this tunnel with mirrors & screens & then i almost broke down into tears bc it was all so overwhelming. they had so many professional photographers asking to take our photos and then the taylor people were handing out raffle tickets telling us to do stuff. it was like this weird underground area that had these gorgeous industrial bathrooms (with so many toiletries like oil sheets & dry shampoo & tampons & gum & hair ties) and there were arcade games and an led dance floor that lit up with hearts where you stood and there was a skee ball thing where we STOOD ON IT AND GOT OUR PHOTO TAKEN and they had claw machines with merch inside and these HUGE photobooth backdrops (BIG REPUTATION + taylors face + a huge snake) and basically you had to do stuff to get tickets and then you could use the tickets to get free merch! we didnt catch on quick enough though so we didn’t get anything more exciting than a water bottle & a tote (which were still so cool)
so anyway, we did some stuff, got a BIG REPUTATION non-alcoholic drink that was like soda water + blackberry syrup + a lime and it was just okay haha and as we went over to try and get our free merch we heard a THATS TAYLOR SWIFT scream from across the room and basically RAN to see what was happening. and that’s when this wall opened up and uh WE WALKED INTO A CONCERT VENUE AND LOST ALL CHILL
IT WAS SUCH A SMALL VENUE HAILEE AND I WERE IN THE BACK ROW BUT LITERALLY WE SPENT 10 MINUTES HYPERVENTILATING AND SCREAMING AT EACH OTHER!!! there were cameras everywhere, and it was so industrial but there was PIANO + THE SPARKLY GUITAR + THE KOI GUITAR?????? AND HER BLACK GUITAR WITH THE STARS ON THE FRETS!! so we hung out for a while in taylor limbo and felt like we were gonna combust and then AND THEN THE NIGHT KICKED INTO HIGH GEAR AND I SWEAR HAILEE AND I BOTH JUST BLACKED OUT 
THE LIGHTS WENT OUT AND TAYLOR JUST FREAKING WALKED OUT ON STAGE AND I ALMOST BURST INTO TEARS SHE WASN’T REAL BUT SHE WAS RIGHT THERE AND I WANTED TO EXPLODE anyway she wore a green jumpsuit with a huge belt and some cute high heeled booties and uh she was her usual cute self being like HI GUYS WHATS UP there were like 200 people there and i couldn’t get over that!!! this was her smallest show in like 10 years???? AND I WAS THERE??? uh but yeah so she did 6 songs - gorgeous + delicate on guitar, all too well + new years day on piano, and shake it off on guitar. here are some highlights from that set...
the whole crowd did *DING* during gorgeous and 123 LET’S GO BITCH during delicate
taylor said that they were trying to decide if they needed backing vocalists and she decided not to and it turned out they didnt need them because we sung literally ALL the backing parts - like the high pitched “delicate” - we did that
she didnt even finish the last delicate bc we sang it so loud and she just laughed
she was so so SOOOOO comfortable with us like i have never seen her so candid and chill and relaxed?? like she was smiling and giggling and she made mistakes and didn’t even care and it was so CUTE I CANT STAND IT
at the piano she was like “oooh sorry i didnt get to sound check hang on lemme figure this out”
when she sat at the piano she was like “wow my hair’s so long” and how she thought about cutting it for these upcoming florida shows since it’s so hot and then the crowd was like OMG CUT IT or OMG DONT CUT IT and our section was like CUT ITTTT and she looked directly at us and was like mmmmm “you guys dont want it....” and wow i think she looked at me then wowowow
she explained that for all too well it was such an emotional song and she used to hate playing it bc it made her so sad but bc we love it so much now she loves playing it bc it makes her think of us and she was freaking SMILING DURING THIS WHOLE PERFORMANCE!! like the last time i saw her perform it live in my presence was 5 years ago at the red tour in chicago and she was crying but during this time she was LAUGHING AND SMILING
someone sang all to welllllll really terribly and off key and the whole audience fell silent and taylor just looked at that person and laughed and we all lost it
then she talked about writing reputation and how it was so cathartic for her and like she came up with the “there will be no explanation there will just be reputation” rhyme and it was so cool that now she has to stick to it and not give interviews so she was excited to explain to us more about the album
AND THEN she told this story about how 2 new years ago she was celebrating and just like realizing that everyone just wants to kiss someone at midnight but you really need someone to look after you while you’re popping advils the next day 
she played new years day and we were all so emo wow
so then she gets up to get her guitar and we’re all like PLAY THE SPARKLY GUITAR!!!! and she looked so dismayed she was like “guys it’s just a prop it isn’t tuned” and we were so sad we were like TUNE IT!!! and she’s like NO I CANT
so thennnn she’s like “okay so i have one more song” and we were all like “PLAY MORE PLAY MORE” and she said “well, i could play you three more songs ORRRR we could take pictures...” and wow everyone died it was wild 
she played shake it off acoustic and im not okay
then she explained what was gonna happen next and she was like FIRST OF ALL i cant really talk to you since i’m touring i need to save my voice and i’m not supposed to talk and second, we’re doing it in groups of four so make friends bc you’ll get photos in groups of four! 
then as she finished she was like “uh i guess i’ll just go back here? no one really told me what was happening or what to do so...ILL SEE YOU SOON!!!”
as we walked out i saw a girl hugging her friend and crying. relatable. so hailee and i waited for our blue color to be called and went to claim our free merch. after we freshened up, we were waiting and this girl offered us poptarts and we both looked at each other and were like “omg poptarts” soooo then we got at the end of the line for the M&G. we were freaking out and we didn’t know what we’re gonna say and it was so surreal. like, we were gonna meet taylor swift. TAYLOR SWIFT! FUCK
so we’re waiting. and then these staff people come over and ask how many we have in our party (we say 2) and immediately they’re like...i think we have 2 openings over here hang on. so they deliberate, and then we’re being motioned to the FRONT OF THE LINE and we skip like 50 people and OUR HEARTBEATS TOOK OFF! WE WERE NOT ALL THERE! WE EXPLODED! WE WERE SO UNPREPARED TO JUMP THAT LINE BUT WOW WE WERE REALLY OUT THERE GETTING READY TO MEET TAYLOR.
we then were ushered upstairs and they lead us over a little bridge that was above the concert venue. eventually we made it past another security checkpoint and got to this fabric walled hallway where we glimpsed MAMA SWIFT and we almost lost it.
as we approached the very front of the line, TREE PAINE SHOWED UP and was just so sweet and nice and bubbly and we immediately decided to stan her. she was like “wow this is such a beautiful group of people you all look fantastic!” and we were like WOW ITS TREE PAINE and so then THEN ANDREA CAME BACK OUT AND WAS LIKE HELLO WOW YOU ALL LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL!!! and i shook her hand and told her it was honor to meet her and she was so so happy
(this whole time dont blame me and delicate was playing in the background)
((at one point tree was trying to figure out what was playing and i was like ITS DELICATE and she was like OH YEAH YOU’RE RIGHT))
sooooooo ummmmmm then security was ushering us around the corner and into this back area and TAYLOR SWIFT WAS RIGHT THERE??????? hailee and i were GRIPPING each others hands and i almost broke down into tears but hailee was like NO YOUR MAKE UP DONT DO IT YET NOT YET HOLD IT TOGETHER
and taylor (that sneaky bitch i love her) saw us together and basically took a photo with the other 2 people in our group and THEN came over to us to do us separately (!!!) ((apparently according to hailee the at&t lady running the thing was like “what is happening” but it’s taylor swift so she can do anything) so she walked over to us and we kept our cool somehow and i was like “WE WAITED 10 YEARS FOR THIS” and she high fived me and was like “WE DID IT!!” and i told her i drove 8 hours from nashville and she was baffled about how far that was. hailee thanked her for making her more courageous and resilient and we thanked her for the pride speech in chicago and she was so excited we went to the rain show. then i thanked her for writing “invisible” and she looked at me like OH WOW IM SHOCKED she was like “wow no one ever talks about that song thank you!” and i told her it made me feel seen and she was just so so kind and warm and did i mention she hugged us? and she’s kinda tall but she felt like our height and she felt like our best friend? ummm yeah so then the at&t people were like PICTURE and we went over and hailee and i both blacked out like we don’t remember what the background looked like??? i assume it’s the same as it always is but we didn’t notice lol um yeah so i remember smiling for the photo and i LEANED MY HEAD AGAINST TAYLORS???!?!? and then as we were finishing i was like IM GOING TO LOUISVILLE ON SATURDAY!!! and she was like “wow im so excited! i cant wait to be back on tour! i always hate the breaks in between!” and then i was like “CAN YOU PLAY SOMETHING FROM SPEAK NOW” and she was like “oh maybe” but she looked so disinterested i was thinking TAYLOR COME ON ITS SPEAK NOW and then i said i love you and she said i love you i think and then we got out and wowowowowowow
tree paine was there again and we were like OMG THAKN YOU CAN WE HUG YOU and she was so sweet like YES OF COURSE!!!! (um @tree-paine you are literally the kindest i would die for you) anyway hailee had a letter for taylor and she asked tree if someone could give it to her and tree was like i’ll put it in my back pocket!! and then we left and we kept thanking people as we walked out and that is the story of the greatest night of my life.
thank you to at&t and to hailee and to @taylornation and of course to @taylorswift wowowow i never thought this would happen to me and it did IT REALLY DID WOW
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