#also the nightmares where I never know where I am
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letters
based off of "to all the boys I loved before" cuse YES I AM A LOSER LIKE THAT FIGHT ME. mlm, fluff, and some spice?? very long story also a bit of a size thing going on cuse...yeah.
I sat on the floor of my bedroom writing yet another letter to a guy I had complications feeling towards.
it was a recurring patern in my life as the moment I shared something special with someone instead of telling them my feelings I'd write them down on a piece of paper and trow it in a box I kept under my bed.
it was a bit pathetic for sure, but can you blame me? love has never worked out for me before, so I much rather admire from a distance.
this letter was addressed to a guy in my school.
Jeong Yunho.
back in 6rd grade, me, him, and some other friends had a small party where we played spin the bottle. at the time a friend of mine had a crush on him that I knew about, so I begged for the bottle not to land on him, but of course it did. I was hesitant, but nonetheless, we shared a short, small kiss, which was my first. safe to say me and her are not on good terms even till this day.
the cringe letter was finished, and I folded it up nicely, putting it in an envelope and writing down his name on it before throwing it in the box and sliding it under my bed.
I didn't think much of it knowing they couldn't get out, so I chose to go to bed for the night.
in the morning, I rushed to the kitchen, my sister sitting on the sofa on her phone, ready to go as I ran around looking for my laptop.
"we'll be late, you know." she said, looking at me from the sofa standing up, trowing her bag over her shoulder.
"I'm sorry, okay, i just can't find my computer. can you go back to my room and look? maybe I missed it. please?" I asked her with a pleading look, hoping she'd go check, and thankfully, with an annoyed groan, she agreed.
she came back after a few minutes computer in hand. "it was by your bed, clothes trown over it."
"Thank you so much." I said, taking it from her and rushing out the door to my car, her following not too far behind me.
the school day passed by normally. the usual boring classes until lunch period hit.
I never ate in the cafeteria as it was way too crowded for me, so I always camped out in the bathroom eating and scrolling through my phone. sure it wasn't the most sanitary thing to do, but it was quiet.
as I was enjoying my lunch devouring a sandwich I made in a rush I heard the door open a familiar voice coming trough.
"y/n? you in here?" it was yunho. I was confused about why he was looking for me, but I didn't make a sound, wanting him to leave in all honesty. I brought my legs up so he couldn't see which stall I was in, but sadly, my phone fell out of my lap as I did so making a lot of noise.
I knew he heard as he knocked on the door. I didn't answer until he slid my letter under the door.
my heart dropped.
I quickly put my things in my bag, stuffing the sandwich in my mouth, and opened the door.
"how did you get that?" I asked my words a bit muffled thanks to the food.
he stumbled back as I opened the door, putting one hand into his jean pocket.
"I found it in my locker this morning. you didn't put it there?" he asked obviously a but confused.
I was panicking. the thought of him knowing how I felt about him was one of my biggest nightmares. I shook my head, no trying to figure out how he could have gotten it and if any of the other guys got it.
he must have picked up on the panic "your hand writing is nice. I'm actually quite flattered you think of me this way."
his words caught me off guard. was he playing, or was he for real?
"Look, you were never supposed to get it. just forget about it, okay?"
"What if I feel the same way? do I still forget about it?"
I stayed quiet, staring at him, not expecting anything like that to come out of his mouth. he sighed, putting the letter in his bag and turning his attention back to me.
"it's actually a bit funny how you never picked up on any of the signs. I don't just go around the school campus trying to strick up a conversation, give compliments, and try to hang out with random people, but you seem quite obvious."
the last sentence struck a bit of a nerve. "I'm not obviou-"
my words were cut off by a pair of soft lips on mine. I was shocked, eyes wide in surprise, tho slowly I calmed down and returned the kiss my hand making its way to his cheek.
he pulled away first, both of us silent as we registered what we (he) just did.
he opened his mouth to say someone, but the bell rang, signalling us that lunch was over.
I pulled away, clearing my throat, and my ears a bit red from embarrassment.
"Let's talk after school, okay? we can meet you back here...if you want, of course."
he nodded the sweet smile on his face that I always adored. "See you then"
...........time skip............
I stood in the bathroom waiting for him. I was a bit scared he would end up not showing up, but I tried to have a bit of hope. my sister decided to go hang out with her friends after school. I didn't really have anything to rush.
20 minutes had passed, and he was still not here. it was upsetting, but somehow, I wasn't too surprised, so I just chose to leave. I got home relatively late as I had stopped at the store to get some food since our fridge was very empty.
my sister was already home sprawled out on the sofa watching a movie as I placed the bags on the kitchen counter.
"How was school?" I asked, glancing at her. for some reason, she was avoiding all eye contact and seemed a bit on edge.
"it was okay. how about you...?"
"it was...interesting, to say the least." I responded, putting the food away as she nodded and stayed quiet.
Once everything was done, I went into my room and instantly checked the box that I kept my letters in. the rest where there but the one yunho got. I instantly knew my sister must have done it in the morning. I wasn't mad, tho since maybe she even did some good?
I sighed and changed, choosing to put my homework off for a bit and relax for a bit to decompose everything that happened today.
it was calm for a while. silent even. until my sister barged in practically braking my door down as I quickly sat up from my bed worried that something had happened. i looked her way, a mischievous smile on her face as she pushed yunho inside my room.
wait, yunho!?
he stood there an awkward smile on his face as he looked around and back at my sister, who closed the door quickly.
"use protection!!" were her last words before she left us there.
I got up quickly and started picking up my clothes, throwing them in my closet to make the place some what clean.
"Hi yunho, I wasn't really expecting anyone, so it's a bit messy"
he laughed and took off his coat, placing it on my dresser that was by the door looking around the room. "it's okay. I did show up without a warning."
I hummed fixing myself up as well to not look too much of a mess.
"I'm sorry that I didn't show up today. I got held back in class. I promise I didn't do it on purpose."
his words seemed honest, and his face had regret written all over it. he walked closer to me, towering over me thanks to his height.
"I couldn't have even texted you a heads up cuse I don't have your number, and I'm so sorry"
I let him finish staying quiet. I had figured as much cuse he didn't seem like the type of person to do something like that. Once he was done, I just kissed him.
I didn't know I had the guts to do something like that but I was glad I did as he returned the kiss immediately his hands finding their way to my waist as mine wrapped around his neck pulling him down slightly.
it got a bit heated surprisingly enough, which I wasn't expecting.
we had moved to my bed making out. it was obvious to both of us that we've been wanting each other for a very long time as things wouldn't be going this far otherwise.
his hands moved up, and my legs, as I pulled away, taking his shirt off, pulling him back into the kiss, we were both getting desperate, but sadly, we got interrupted by my sister.
she came in, completely ignoring the sight in front of her, and sat down on my bed, throwing her homework next to us.
"help me." is all she said.
me and yunho were both very embarrassed, but nonetheless, we stopped what we were doing and both ended up helping her.
#kpop#kpop bg#kpop blog#boy group#new writer#mlm#gay#lgbtq#male x male#fluff#spice#ateez yunho#jeong yunho#ateez jeong yunho#yunho x male reader#jeong yunho x reader#yunho#yunho x m!reader#ateez#ateez x male reader#yunho x reader#yunho fic#ateez x m!reader#yh x male reader#ateez x reader#ateez jeong yunho x male reader#male x reader#male reader#i love yunho sm
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Would You Go With Me?
Relationship: Emily Prentiss x Reader
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Request: No
Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Mentions of a Crime Scene, and Blood, Vague Mentions of a Serial Killer
Word Count: 1,196
Main Masterlist: Here
Criminal Minds Masterlist: Here
Summary: Sheâs come back. But people are never the same as when you leave them.
Part One: The One That Got Away
Consider Donating: Here
ââYa amarâ? You havenât called me that in a very long time, Em.â The woman stated with a tilt of her mouth, focusing her attention on the evidence board to their left in the conference room where the other profilers were.
Emily just stood there, floundering like a fish out of water. This was the first time in many years that she had set her eyes on her in person. While she still looked gorgeous, the closer she looked, the more she noticed; there was no doubt that the years of nightmares she undoubtedly had were not kind. There were small scars, and one large scar left over from the incident. Bags underneath her eyes that were nearly dark enough to be bruises. She wore no makeup which Emily knew meant that something was wrong.
âYou⌠your house.â Prentiss inquired, her voice unsteady.
âUnfortunately, a necessary precaution.â She stated, drawing her attention back to the dark haired agent. âThe blood is mine, so donât waste time typing it. Iâve taken little by little over the years so that if I needed to, I could fake a crime scene easier.â
âYouâre the point agent for The Mimic case?â Thankfully, Hotch swooped in which let Emily process her emotions.
âI was,â she sighed, leaning against the door frame.
âWhy would you fake your death?â Liam asked, also dealing with the information.
In lieu of an answer, the former agent placed an envelope down on the table. There was a black heart with an arrow drawn through it. She had apparently already opened it, as the edges were torn, and in her hands, she held the contents. A single piece of paper with a legible, yet messy scrawl.
âThat was left on my front porch.â She muttered, re-reading the letter. âDonât bother checking for prints either. Imitirovat never leaves any.â
âWe should bag these for evidence still, and analyze the writing. It may be able to tell us something.â JJ stated, picking up the envelope and walking back into the conference room they had been given. Their unit chief left with the natural blonde, which left the three former partners in Liamâs office in silence.
âI am glad to see you alive, mon ami.â Shelby whispered, his face scrunched as he tried not to let his emotions take over.
âGood to see you too, Li.â She said, dropping her eyes to her hands, which still had the letter. Sensing the tension, the Frenchman left the two women be with just a pat to their shoulders.
For a long time, neither of them spoke. There was just too many things to say, and not enough words in any language that they knew. Combine that with the amount of time that has passed, and they were both struggling. However, she figured she would make the first move and come over to sit in the chair opposite Emily rather than just standing about the room.
âI thought you were dead.â Prentiss picked at her fingernails again, resisting the urge to bite at them.
âSorry, Em. Honestly didnât think that you would be the one to find that. Figured some beat cops would.â Running a hand through her hair, the woman took her time to focus on the other.
She looked amazing. The bangs were gone much to her dismay, but she could get used to this version of Emily. There were no bags under her eyes, and she looked well fed. Her clothes were tailored to complement her figure. All in all, she looked like the Emily she used to know.
âHave you lived here this whole time?â Emily asked, not really knowing how to speak with her.
âNo,â she shook her head, âIâve moved around every few months. Havenât stayed anywhere longer than six months the entire time. Stayed in D.C. for a while.â
At that, Emilyâs head shot up. âYou were in D.C.?â
She nodded. âYeah. Sergioâs cute.â
Prentiss chuckled. âOf course the best tracker Interpol ever had would be able to find me and my cat.â
She also let out a small chuckle at this. But another bout of silence passed between them. It was that awkward silence where you were terrified to say the wrong thing and make everything go sideways. A type that they never had before now.
âIâm sorry I never came back.â
âIâm sorry I never reached out.â
The women overlapped in a breath. Looking into each otherâs eyes, they began to laugh at the absurdity of it all. She motioned for Emily to go first.
Taking a moment to catch her breath, Emily spoke. âIâm sorry I never reached out, or tried to find you. I just figured you needed some time to recover in the hospital alone because you wouldnât let me touch you at one point. But when I came to collect you on the day you were to be released, you were already gone. The next day we got your badge and gun in at Interpol.â
âIâm sorry I didnât come back.â She repeated softly. âI donât really remember a lot from the hospital stay, so Iâm sorry that I pushed you away. When I was released, and you werenât there⌠I donât know. I guess my brain ran straight to survival mode because it was all too much. The agents we lost at the safe house. I was terrified that he was going to find me so I ran, and I kept running.â
âListen, itâs natural to go into that mode. I just wish we wouldâve found each other earlier.â Emily leaned forward, and captured her hands in hers.
âStill, weâre here now. Hunting a serial killer just like old times.â The other woman teased, a genuine smile coming to her lips.
Prentiss chuckled, looking around for a brief moment to collect her thoughts. âYeah. Yeah, we are. So, how about we get out there and get this guy one and for all? I want this case closed.â
Saying nothing, the woman stood, bringing Emily up with her as their hands were still connected. She gave a final squeeze before walking over to the door. However, as she hovered in the threshold, she turned to face the dark haired woman again.
âMaybe once this case is done, you wouldnât mind letting me take you out for a drink?â She offered hesitantly, scared that all the time apart had changed them. But Emily, ever the confident and sure of herself woman, came to stand next to her. Placing a hand on her shoulder, she ducked in to press a kiss to her cheek, careful to wipe away the lipstick mark that was left.
âIâd like that.â And with that, Emily went to where her team and Liam stood near the evidence board. Reeling from being that close to her again, the woman sighed, and brushed her fingertips against where she had kissed her. With determination in her soul, the woman vowed two things as she went back out; she was going to catch this bastard, and she was getting that date with Emily.
âEvery ending was a beginning in disguise, and I chose to begin again with you.â Unknown
#rebelliousstories#writing#criminal minds fic#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds#emily prentiss x female reader#emily prentiss is a lesbian#emily prentiss x you#emily prentiss x reader#emily prentiss imagine#emily prentiss
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0/10 dissociative experience where I desperately want to go home only to realize thatâs exactly where I am
#also the nightmares where I never know where I am#makes waking up so fun /sarcasm#I want to know where I am and be happy#dissociation#actually dissociative#words#I want to be home
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More doodles of the new chapter of How Nightmare Became Dadmare by @topazshadowwolf please go read it
#UTDR#UTMV#Topazshadowwolf#HNBD#Ink Sans#Horror Sans#Killer Sans#Dust Sans#Nightmare Sans#As soon as I got off work I dropped everything to go read this and I was not disappointed#Sibling energy was off the charts in this one and I am so well fed by it#Also (spoilers) the part where they're about to train and Dust says Nightmare is looking at them almost like he's proud#Fucking losing my mind yelling shaking the bars of my cage#HE LOVES HIS SONS#Sorry I'm normal about this I swear#He is (spoilers again) LITERALLY disrupting universes to adopt another son this guy is so far into dad mode he may never get out#Anyways hope you don't mind the tag again!#I know I'm in your inbox like every other day about this I promise I will calm down at some point
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So far I'm honestly a lot better at drawing Puzzles with the big cartoony eyes than the white dot ones for the moment
#đŹ rory rambles#but it's a lot of fun jdfghkhjgl#my arm is getting better little by little so I can sketch :3 yippie#btw I finished the Waluigi arc. it was. an arc#Tari was the highlight of it for me#girl lore!!!!!!!!#Meggy was so different tho... for obvious reasons. feels like a separate character#that's also true for SMG4. again obvious reasons#also back here not everyone had subtitles just the otherwise unintelligible ones which slightly annoys me#I appreciate Subtitles For All because I am not a native speaker and it helps me process#I don't care for the Wario brothers. a superpower that's fueled by receiving rejection and hate is a cool concept for a villain though#I gotta check out what Saiko's deal is#also wdym SMG3 actually has a psych degree#I'm thinking I'll do the Lawsuit Arc next because honestly I don't know if I'll care for much of the rest. Anime YouTube and Genesis sound-#-like they contain important lore but is it worth it. hmm hmm#the old designs bother me and the humor always did#but my perfectionistic ass will never start writing anything for this fandom until I feel I have an adequate understanding of The Lore#glimpsed a Wattpad oneshot where Mr Puzzles and Meggy make breakfast and the comments pointed out how Meggy can't cook for shit#and would've canonly realistically burnt the kitchen down#a variation of my worst nightmare
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sometimes you spend a lot of time trying to forgive yourself for the crime of being alive. you might spend 21 years trying to forgive yourself. "i'm sorry," you cry, "i'm sorry that i was born and i ruined your life." you succeed, somehow. you're forgiven. and then you realize at 22 that none of it was your fault in the first place. and in the place of that sorrow and regret comes anger and hurt. it's easier to blame yourself than to feel the true depth of that kind of pain. aching, stinging, lonely pain, abject pain. you think the reason they didn't take care of you was because you were somehow flawed and unlovable. but they never cared in the first place, not in a way that mattered.
betrayal in the form of neglectful parents leaves a wound that feels like it really will never close. a profound emptiness, a profound misunderstanding of yourself. what should be there just isn't.
#thoughts#i had a nightmare last night about being back at my parents house#i remember the yard in the summer. the bright green when the sun hit the grass. the wetness on the ground from the summer rain.#that yard was my world for years. i could venture no further.#for most of that i never ventured outside at all#i dreamed that it was summer again#and i was young and frightened#and my body was horribly wrong. wasps came and picked at my skin until it wasn't right anymore#i begged for help but nobody listened to me#it'll be a hard day today. i can feel it already.#the kind of day where all i want to do is curl up and cry and wallow and wail. sometimes the weight hits me.#i cry both because of how deep that wound is but also because i know i never have to go back#i was in so much pain for so long. i dont have to be anymore#but i still am. the pain is always there.
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So, my family is rewatching Rings of Power, and since Iâm the one in the family that read The Silmarillion (like a masochist), Iâm the one who keeps getting asked all the questions.
#âdid this happen?â well broadly speaking yes but Tolkien never fleshed this part of middle-earthâs history out in much detail#but I know exactly where they got the idea for whatever it is most of the time#âis Galadrielâs husband really deadâ of course not#âdid Sauron ever go by the name Halbrand?â well not really but also how much time do you have because this is going to take some explaining#âis that Gandalf?â almost definitely but theyâre doing the blue wizard thing with him by taking him to Rhun#also I think theyâre making him the basis for the hobbitâs âman in the moonâ song so Iâm honestly okay with it#âis the Queen ladyâs nightmare significantâ Yes three times over but how am I supposed to say anything about it#without giving away whatâs probably a season finale#âwhatâs with the mithril?â Hell if I know Iâm as confused as you are about that#actually the Galadrielâs husband one was funny#because of course Celeborn shows up in the movies#but my mom wasnât sure that was actually her husband#or some random blorbo#or a second husband#which then opened up the whole conversation#to how the elves are painfully monogamous even when their spouse dies#because they way they die is weird and also#they all still have generational and firsthand trauma from the fallout of that one elf guy who did get remarried#rings of power spoilers
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tumblr blogs are so scary on desktop..
#when the thing is like [url].tumblr.com instead of tumblr.com/[url] and it's so big and sometimes even has a custom layout..#that is nightmare fuel to me#it's so disorienting and stressful when they look like that ;-;#I never know where to look or what button does what and it's not in a clear linear order and there's no timestamps and then I want to cry#(/mild exaggeration - but less than I wish it was. why am I like this)#(it activates my fight or flight response for some reason and I always click off immediately)#just figured out how to change the order of the url thing to fix it tho so yeay :>#just me rambling#should I put my complaining tag on this?#it's not like discourse or ranting or any typical thing that could upset someone#but I also wouldn't want to offend anyone who deeply loves custom layouts#they just stress me out. I'm glad y'all are enjoying them
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One of my big compulsions is taking a fuck ton of screenshots Just In Case a piece of information is important in like 4 years and I can't remember it (sometimes the information is an instagram post that I might not remember later and of course needs to be recorded everywhere (I will Not be looking at that again)) so today is my transfer 16000 images off my phone admin day (woo)
Like yeah I never looked at any of them and they were completely irrelevant to my daily life, But what if I need them â¨ď¸ later â¨ď¸ (you'll see that the idea of Later is doing a lot of heavy lifting here) OR what if there's a vital piece of information in the mix somewhere that I'll lose forever if I delete them? So: onto the external hard drive they go
This is one of those cases where. Yeah. Ideally I wouldn't take 16000 screenshots in half a year. And YEAH ideally I'd just delete them and not transfer them somewhere else to never look at again. BUT at least I get a clean slate and I can maybe not mindlessly save everything for 2 seconds. It's like. Small wins? Progress. Yknow.
#rangnar rambles#i also use my tumblr drafts this way which is how i have probably 2000 drafts for this blog that are just? like me saving a post for 'later#and then theres too many in my drafts for me to even find *MY* drafts#i need to just hard reset the draft function bc its literally unusable for me#'matt this is all irrational and weird' by god. my irrational thoughts disorder makes me do weird shit? are you fr rn??? đ¨đ¨#i get so stupidly in my own head and then i dont make progress towards Anything#even like a fun sideblog where i can actually yknow. post that 2k nightmare? i just cringe myself out like a dumbass đ#i feel like ocd thoughts always sound lame out loud (and in my head to myself too)#like the Urgency doesnt come across#like in the moment i am Completely convinced that my national insurance number and bank deets are in there somewhere#and theres suddenly no way on earth i could ever find them again if i delete the picture. so to the hard drive they go#i Would go through that whole thing if i suddenly needed a screenshot from 2019 btw. like the crazy isnt theoretical#ive hallucinated gas leak smells before and woken up my flatmates bc i couldnt convince myself i was over reacting#its just cus the seasons have changed that everythings ramping up but omg its hard to do anything but spiral nowadays#thats a little dramatic but i am losing like. a quarter of the day to my ocd#its like. not great đŹ#im not back to convincing myself i gave my dad cancer but i am not letting myself use half the kitchen again#but eh soo la voo we ball#HAH i checked my drafts after this and i was lowballing so hard#5.7k on this blog. 12k on my main đ. its not funny but it kind of is#this is why youll never catch me running a queue#this is such a miserable post but i do feel the need to not let it sit in the drafts pile. to prove the point i guess đđđ#'no one gives a shit this is your blog' 'oh my GOD WHAT IF PEOPLE GIVE A SHIT' <- omg shut upppp youre so embarassing đ#one more time for the gallery: i am like. aware that these feelings are irrational. like i am fine it just takes time for reality to kick in#ANYWAYS what was that who said that that was so weird im gonna go look at old romantic era paintings now#if tam is a screenshot fiend in the next fic u know what happened
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.
#tag talk#social anxiety is so much worse to deal with when only half of you is anxious because you never know when it'll happen#like. R is not anxious at all. she loves being around people and since we came out she's not scared anymore#but me on the other hand? being around people is a nightmare. agoraphobic for sure.#I wanted to go running again cause we woke up at six again. but the thought of going outside and being perceived? terrifying.#maybe I need to practice getting R to front. we're used to thinking of L as the defensive front but if R's sociability is the best strategy#then she would be the strongest front to present.#the problem is I've tried that and it just results in me feeling even more sullen and anxious because I feel dragged into things then.#because going out on public even with friends still makes me feel anxious and angry and generally annoyed.#ugh I'm so tired of being unpredictably two different people.#if I were just L all the time I could embrace that and find workarounds to these issues. but they hit me so unpredictably#so I don't have the reliability to trust. so my strategy is usually just 'wait until you change into someone without those problems'#because whatever issue I have can usually be fixed by the other half of me.#scared of upsetting people? turn into L. scared of socializing? turn into R. scared of doing tasks? turn into L.#it's also wild because when we're L we shift into a morning person. and R is definitely a night owl#so waking up at five am to go out and read a book on the couch is so great as L but staying up all night reading is R's sweet spot.#idk. I'm so tired of bouncing so much between these two people#and I'm beginning to suspect that we have different food preferences as well. which is.. frustrating#I wish it were as easy as going 'oh duh I'm making this up in my own head' and just stopping#like. yeah it's all in my head unfortunately that's where my sense of identity is too.
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screaming in the club
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time for another vent in tags
#so i was joking and i thought it came through but im also dumb and autistic and my jokes dont always cross. sO#i was joking about one of my roomates not seeing Nightmare Before Christmas before bc i was showing 2 of them my picture vinyl of it and whe#n one of them said they never saw it i said âbut you were a loser on tumblr in the 2010s wdymâ and their fiance was just rude to me and i th#ought it was clearly a joke but ig not and they lowley attacked me for it? im just?? i tried to clarify that i was joking and they know im a#utistic. hell the one i was joking to is also autistic but idk so now i feel like utter shit especially after all i did today thst juet drai#ned me. ive been trying to fix our 2nd shower. i had a meeting. i had an extremely hard therapy session. and i showered today. its been hell#like i am trying to get thru relapsing on SH and my ED and ofc they dont know but that shit made it worse and i dont want to say anything bc#then ill feel like im guilt tripping? idk but im also super nervous about a HRT appmt i have coming up and i cant afford it and we have no#food in the house i can eat rn and no one has gone shopping. i cant go shopping either bc i cant drive/dont have a car. and its making it#harder to help get back on track with eating when theres nothing for me to eat? so everything is fucking amazing right now.#the only meals i could POSSIBLY have and all claimed by the one roommate i was joking with. it all takes up half our freezer too so thats#fucking awesome. all this food for one person and none that i can eat or the other vegan in the house can eat. i have been hungry for DAYS.#all there has been for me to eat is cup ramen and grilled cheese. AND SOMEONE WHO WASNT FUCKING VEGAN ATE ALL THE VEGAN CHEESE IM GENUINELY#SO PISSED OFF? like dude yall have your own cheese wtf#the thing is its already really hard for me to tell when i am actually hungry bc of years of ignoring it so when i actually feel it and ther#es nothing it really gets to me. im so tired and idek where my EBT card is to get myself something. its all just so much.#i just want to lay in my bed and sleep for days. but i cant. i have too much shit to do. like even just tomorrow i have to clean the#bathroom. mop the kitchen. do dishes. shovel snow. and just generally take.care of shit because since we have 2 roomates MIA right now and#no one else wanted to do shit i had to step up and i am STRUGGLING. i have been for a while. the thing is everyone that didnt sign up for sh#it didnt have much going on besides probable seasonal depression#i relapsed. have debilitating mental health. i can barely get out of bed before 4 pm. and i have to take care of myself and my cat.#im so close to snapping on them at this point#i need the one roommate i actually like to come back or i swear i will lose my shit. hes only been gone for 6 days but HOLY SHIT#everything has gone to shit#vent over ig im going to sleep soon. still hungry if i cant find something.
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i saw you tagged an oc named samaela on my post. who are they im curious. please share with the class đ
(aka âi made that post about a character archetype i love and getting to hear about new characters that fit that archetype is literally the best case scenario for meâ)
Oh hi for the love of god hello!!!
This is Samaela. My babygirl. I desperately wish I had more recent art of her to share, but alas I don't. A quick scroll through my blog also shows that Most of the posts I've made talking about her are also a few years old and outdated at this point but rest assured I think about her Constantly.
Samaela is a World of Warcraft OC, and also one of my oldest OCs in general regardless of fandom/universe. Long story short, she's a Forsaken hunter with little to no memory of her past life but Vivid memory of her death (by werewolf) and a history of making bad decisions in the name of Living Deliciously.
She was resurrected post Death By Werewolf, and the process caused her to Become Werewolf. Sorta. She's a weird little fiend and an abomination even by undead standards, which leads to her necromancer running All Sorts of Tests and Experiements. Now those aren't as bad or nefarious as they sound, really, but Samaela gets tired of being a science project pretty quick, so she moves as far away from her necromancer as she can, makes a few friends and enters a 2-ish year long situationship with her Boybestfriend, during which she indulges in many bad habits such as hunting living humans for sport and eating them, which garners her a reputation for being vicious and needlessly cruel. She regrets some of it sometimes, mostly she doesn't care, and gets off mostly scotch free because she's very good at weaving stories that paint her in a good light, and her folks don't like humans anyway. Which just emboldens her.
(Here seen with her Boybestfriend, Tari, my other babygirl, after a bad hunt)
Eventually her Boybestfriend has to leave, and she is Very Sad about it but they part amicably. Unfortunately having her voice of reason and only person whom she trusted in this whole wide world move away makes her Worse. She continues to be Very Good At Lying, but still ends up in trouble with the authorities a handful of times, some friends turn their back on her as a result and she makes self preservation her number one priority. This leads to a sleuth of Decisions which eventually end up putting the life of someone at risk, someone Very Important to her Boybestfriend, and once he finds out their relationship cracks even more. She jumps to anger and resentment straight on and continues to push people away and make more Choices, until her own life is put at risk and she's forced to rethink.
Currently she's at this rethinking stage. She doesn't regret most of the things she did, but she regrets the things that affected her personally. Empathy is a hard concept for her to grasp, but she's willing to make an effort for her own sake. At her core she still wants to survive above all else, and if that means letting people help her..... well, she doesn't like it but she'll think about it.
Samaela is Difficult, and she will never not be. She needs a strong support system to help her, but unfortunately the mere thought of letting her walls down and being vulnerable makes her sick. She is hard to get along with and harder to like.... but a handful of people have gone through the effort it takes to love her all the same. That's enough for now to keep her from spiraling more, but her fate is very uncertain. She has many amends to make and she's not exactly willing to make all of them, but her self preservation instinct is so strong it might as well push her in that direction even if just to keep herself alive.
Despite her many Ls she has many Ws. Women want her. Men fear her. She fucks hard and nasty. She makes dioramas in her spare time. She is surprisingly good at keeping people safe. She likes the color green so much she always has at least One green acessory on her at all times. She's not very good at swimming but still loves the beach. She has a gender that can be best described as Indescribable. Woman, but watch out. She can also pretty effectively communicate with her hunting dogs due to her mutations, and her insides are so rancid due to the Experiments that getting bitten by her in an immediate death sentence, and she is quite fond of biting. Because of this some have taken to calling her Plaguehound <3
As for her previous life.... well that's a whole other mess. All I'll say is that she has two living siblings, one who hasn't given up looking for her, but neither one would recognize her now, and it's unlikely she'd recognize them either. She barely remembers enough about her human life to know her name, much less about her family.
In fact, she has met her older sister in the past. It didn't end well for the sister in question. Dog fights are gnarly đ
#asks answered#gumy-shark#oc:samaela#she is a mess and i am deeply obsessed with her#her voiceclaim is glaze/woodentoaster. yes the rainbow factory/awoken/beyond her garden/nightmare night/prototype vip guy#her sister survived the encounter also but not unscathed and possibly traumatized#granted she attacked sammy first and sammy didn't know it was her sister but also#chances are nothing would have changed if sammy did know.#they never had the best relationship and sammy might not remember the reason but she remembers the spite#she and tari are sorta making amends. they will probably never be as close as they used to be anymore but they're making steps#not sure where they're going but they're goinf#she sorta made amends with her necromancer too. sammy still doesn't trust her with anything relating to her body tho
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tagged by @pxiie !! ahh! thank you for the tag, this was legit so fun and also so much thinking haha, i dont play a lot of games so it was hard not to just make them all little nightmares t-t
im going to tag @norsferatu (ofc uwu) @teddytoroa @makahitaki @vanarobot and @egg-is-killing-me but no pressure aye
#okay so i didnt pick a best soundtrack because it would have just been little nightmares and subnautica and inside#and inside and LN are kinda just ambient noise but im not willing to commit to subnautica#and while i dont fundamentally agree with the idea of guilty pleasure (enjoy what you want; ya know??) i also play mean runs of detroit#i play a lot of kill connor runs where i kill him as much as possible just for fun#and that i suppose is a guilty pleasure#i also feel bad for the android that greets you in the home screen#and i dont hate minecraft i just never really got into it aye#it seems lovely and charming but its the same as like the sims for me? like i personally am just not the target market#also that childhood game is a neopets game called fyoras quest and its so fun and you play as a little frog man#anyway ill stop rambling!! but thank you for the tag! and mutuals dont feel pressured or anything to do this one ^-^
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anyways i saw a video of non dutch people pronouncing dutch names and im proud to announce that two of my characters and one of my coworker's names are there
#also in WHAT WORLD is anne-fleur a hard name?? is it bc of the dutch e being the english a i will never know#i will confess i shot myself in the foot naming her friend lieke. i just picked names i liked without considering that shit#most of the annoying dutch things in that play i did fully aware they would be a nightmare (but i was doing what felt right)#lieke i just wasnt thinking#anyways proud to announce i did decently#like i can do willemijn and thats all that matters#also they had kees there?? i dont think kees is hard.#maybe bc i was exposed to it via widm so i heard it said a lot#at least merel is easy to say and since shes one of two leads in goud i think i did well there.#now i am thinking of a play i did in high school which was set in switzerland and we all sat down and did agreed pronunciations#so like they probs weresnt correct swiss german but they were consistent and that links in to believability#which has now made me think of than dammed essay where the accents were not consistent#i would have been fine if all the dutch ppl had british accents tbh but NEE hanna van vliet was there and threw it off#(its actually a lot more complex than that)#imma shut up#OH GOD I JUST THOUGHT OF THE SURNAMES IN GOUD. FUCKING ROOIJAKKERS.#de smet is easy tho :)#oh god i just remembered theres a minor character called froukje#mind u while i go scream#at elast froukje is VERY MINOR
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Help Us Survive This Winter: A Fatherâs Plea â¤ď¸âđŠš
My name is Mohammed, and I never imagined that one day I would have to write these words, asking for help to simply keep my family alive. I used to work as a painter and decorator, taking pride in providing for my family and raising my two boys, Arafa and Mohammed, with love and security. But everything changed overnight.
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Our home, the place where we built memories, was destroyed in a bombing. The car I depended on to make a living was reduced to ashes. We were left with nothing. Now, my familyâmy wife, my parents, my brother Ahmed, and my boysâare crammed into a school near the Port of Gaza, a shelter that is no longer a place of learning, but a refuge for the displaced.
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The constant sound of gunfire and bombs haunt us day and night. Each explosion shakes the ground beneath us and tears at our spirits. My children, Arafa and Mohammed, once so full of life, now cower in fear. They have nightmares and cry in their sleep. The trauma they are enduring has stolen their childhood. My heart breaks every time I see the fear in their eyes, knowing that I canât make it go away.
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We are living in survival mode. There is no money for food. No fuel to stay warm as winter creeps closer. No medicine to treat the constant sicknesses that come with our living conditions. And no warm clothing to protect my children from the freezing nights that are just around the corner. I watch them shiver, hungry and cold, and I feel utterly powerless as a father.
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We���ve lost everything, and I have no means to provide for my family. Weâve reached a point where we cannot survive without help. I never thought Iâd be in this positionâhaving to rely on the generosity of strangers to keep my family alive. But I am here, pleading with you, because the alternative is unthinkable.
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Please, if you can spare anything at all, it could mean the difference between life and death for us. Your donation, no matter how small, can help us buy food so my children wonât go to bed hungry. It can help us find fuel to keep warm in the brutal winter months ahead. It can provide medicine for my boys and warm clothing to protect them from the cold.
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I know the world is full of need right now, but I hope you can find it in your heart to help my family. We are just one of many who have lost everything, but to us, your kindness could change our world. It could give my children a chance to feel safe again, to heal from the trauma they are carrying, and to survive the months ahead.
Thank you for reading, for caring, and for anything you can do to help. Your generosity will not only provide us with the necessities we need to survive but also restore a bit of hope in a time when it feels like all hope has been lost.
With all my heart, thank you.
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Everlong (Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader)
A/N: This was not a request, just a thought I had and had to get out. "Everlong" by Foo Fighters just scratches my brain in a way very few songs can, and it fits perfectly for this fic. Hope you guys enjoy.
Summary: Logan offers you his bed as a friend, knowing how hard it is for you to fall asleep alone. But after months of sleeping next to him platonically, things finally take a turn...
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI!!! SMUT! Thigh riding, Oral (f!receiving), Fingering, Unprotected PIV (wrap it up!), Cockwarming, praise kink, breeding kink (if you squint), cocky!Logan, softdom!Logan, non-sexual intimacy to sexual intimacy, friends to lovers, man-handling, rough sex, afab!reader/f!reader, feelings, fluff, cursing, def some grammatical errors, I think that's it.
Word Count: 4,619 jeeeeeeezzzzz this is DEPRAVED
Sleep was hardâthat is, until you started sleeping in Loganâs bed.Â
It had all started out so innocent. You were sitting on a couch in the study, flicking through the pages of your favorite book. You had just finished your fourth lap around the grounds of the mansion, and you decided you needed a break. The clock on the wall read 2:22 AM, mocking you, reminding you that of all the gifts you have, sleeping would never be one of them.Â
âWhatâre you doing awake?â You jumped at the voice breaking up the silence, but quickly recognized its bassy, deep tone. You turned to face Logan in the doorway.Â
âJust canât sleep,â you answered, shrugging your shoulders. He wore a beater and gray sweatpants, and you struggled against the urge to trail your eyes up and down his body. Youâd be lying if you said you didnât want himâyouâve wanted him for months.Â
Logan crossed his arms against his chest and smiled softly. âCanât sleep either,â he said, taking a step closer. âYou can come up to my room, if you wantâ he offered. âNext time you canât sleep, or you have a nightmare, or you just canât think of anything to do, come find me.â
You smiled at his words, at his kindness, at his willingness to help you. âThank you, Logan,â you whispered.Â
âNo problem, princess.â And then he turned to leave, walking back through the hallway and up the stairs to his room.Â
Youâre still not sure what came over you in those following momentsâstill donât understand where your confidence came fromâbut you forced yourself up from the couch and down the hall, following Loganâs path to his room.Â
He was already inside, already had the door closed, so you knocked. And the door immediately swung open. You swallowed, parting your lips nervously. âLo, do you think I could take you upââ
But he didnât even let you finish. He grabbed your arm and tugged you into the darkness of his room, navigating you carefully to his bed. He laid you down and walked to the other side, climbing in next to you. He brought the covers over your bodies, shuffling under the sheets, settling in, and then everything was silent.Â
You tried to get comfortable. You rolled onto your stomach and waited, eyes shut tight, hoping that sleep would take you under its current. But it didnât. You rolled back onto your side, away from Logan, opening and closing your eyes frustratedly.
âYou okay?â He asked. You could hear Logan inching towards you, his front suddenly pressing against your back.Â
You hummed in affirmation, leaning your back into him. He reached a tentative arm around your waist and pulled you into his chest. âIs this okay?â He husked, his lips at the shell of your ear.Â
âYeah,â you panted into the darkness of his room, taking shallow breaths, your heart beating rapidly in your chest. You could smell him everywhereâon the sheets, the pillowcase, in the air of the room. It was all leather and musk and pine and denim. And there he was, holding you, his thumb drawing soft circles into your slightly exposed midriff. Something about it was overwhelming, but also comforting, as though all your senses were being cradled by him.
He could hear your heart beating, could hear your breath catching in your throat. âRelax,â he whispered. âIâve got you. Go to sleep.â Your eyes fluttered closed, and you focused on Loganâs breathing. It was constant, stable, steadfast. He was so warm, so solid. And soon enough, you found yourself giving in to sleep.Â
You woke up a few hours later, the pale light of the moon still pushing through the curtains. Loganâs legs were tangled with yours, your face pressed into the center of his chest, his arm wrapped around your back, holding you tight. You tried to lift your head to read the clock behind you on the nightstand.
But Logan pulled you back down. âGo back to sleep,â he murmured against the crown of your head. âToo early.âÂ
Thatâs how most nights have been since thenâclimbing into his bed, completely innocently, just to be able to sleep. He holds you all night, keeping you close. And when the sun finally rises, you both get up and head down to the kitchen, watching as Logan brews you a pot of coffee.Â
Itâs shockingly domestic and incredibly intimate. And yet, the two of you have never talked about it. Itâs a silent agreement, one based on pattern, convention, and repetition. These very events have played out more times than you can countâfor months now. It has become so normalized that you donât question it, donât even think about it when you crawl into his bed, and he pulls you into his chest.Â
So, tonight starts out like any other. Your feet pad along the dark, mahogany wood floors, down the dim, quiet hallway, towards Loganâs room. Youâre only wearing a pair of panties and one of Loganâs old t-shirts, the hem falling to the middle of your thighs.Â
You stand in front of his door and knock. You arenât nervous anymoreâarenât anxious as he opens the door. Heâs already shirtless, wearing just his boxersâwhich, however, is something you will never get used to. He smiles, his eyes trailing up and down your body as he steps to the side, inviting you in.Â
You know the drill by nowâyou walk to your side of the bed, lying down and pulling the covers up to your chin. Logan follows suit. You move in silence, but itâs a comfortable silence. Itâs a silence shared by two people who donât have to say a word, donât have to communicate to feel connection. His arms wrap around your body, and he tugs you into his chest.Â
âDidnât see you today,â he mumbles, his lips brushing your forehead. âWish I couldâve.â His fingertips graze up and down your back, your t-shirt hitching up as you get comfortable, revealing your bare legs.Â
âIâm here now,â you whisper, pressing your face into the crook of his neck, smelling him, letting him overtake your senses. He tangles your legs with his.
âIs this my shirt, by the way?â he asks, his hands sliding down to the hem, which is now bunched up above the waistband of your panties.Â
You smile into his neck. âMaybe,â you answer, giggling softly.Â
His fingertips slip just under the t-shirt, tentative and hesitant, waiting for you to push him away, to tell him no. But you donât. âLooks better on you than it does on me,â he husks, his thigh settling between your legs so that youâre straddling it.Â
âTh-thanks,â you stutter, trying to ignore the way he bumps against your core, the way his words make your heart race. You shut your eyes and wrap your arms around his center, letting him engulf you in his warmth. You swallow your feelings down and close your eyes. âNight, Lo,â you mutter. Â
âNight, princess,â he says, his lips against the crown of your head.Â
You listen carefully to his breathing, like you always do, and after a few moments, you find yourself falling asleep.
When you wake up a few hours later, your back is against Loganâs front. His arm keeps you pressed tightly to his chest, his nose nudging against the crook of your neckâyou can feel his breath, warm on your skin. Your legs are intertwined, his knee just inches away from your core.Â
Logan moves in his sleep, his knee bumping against your core now, his nose nuzzling into your neck, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin just under your ear. You take a deep breath, pleasure pulsing between your thighs as Logan moves again, his thigh dragging against you. You canât help the moan that falls from your lips.Â
He moves again, and thatâs when you feel itâhis erection stiff against the curve of your ass. Heat spreads across your chest, up to your neck, your stomach somersaulting as his hips press harder into your ass.
âL-Lo,â you stutter into the darkness of his room. But he doesnât answer. His thigh slides against your core again. You can feel the wetness pooling between your legs, soaking your panties. âLogan,â you choke, moaning louder this time. Â
He hums in response, nuzzling his nose deeper into your neck, his lips pressing against your skinâthe ghost of a kiss. Itâs too muchâyou want to grind down on his thigh, want to feel his cock pressing against your ass, want to feel his hips rutting against yours. You thought maybe this would happen, hoped that one night would lead to something like this, but you never dreamed it would actually come to pass.Â
Loganâs thigh rubs against your heat again, and you mumble his name, your breathing quickening. âFuck,â you groan, involuntarily bucking your hips against Loganâs. His erection drags along your ass.Â
You force yourself to be still as Logan grunts into your neck. âYou awake, pretty girl?â He whispers against your ear.Â
âMhm,â you murmur, trying to play half-asleep. You donât want to let on that you can feel him hard against you, and you pray you arenât soaking through your panties and onto his thigh.Â
You swear you can hear him mumble a soft fuck under his breath. Your thoughts race around your head. Maybe he was awake the whole time. Maybe he felt your hips roll against him. Maybe he can smell the arousal growing between your thighs. You know he can hear your heart hammering against your ribcage.Â
But his arm tightens its grip around your waist, and he pulls you closer, holding you down against his thigh. âWhat were you doing, sweetheart?â He rasps, pressing a true, open-mouthed kiss to your neck. You gasp, a shiver running down your spine.Â
âWh-what do you mean?â You stutter, stumbling around your words as he kisses your neck again, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin just under your ear.Â
He moves his knee, pressing harder into your core, dragging his thigh against your aching heat. You stifle a moan as he repeats the motion. âFelt you riding me, pretty girl,â he huffs, his hands gripping your waist, guiding your hips along his thigh. âSmelt you, too,â he whispers, his lips still at your neck. âCan feel that pretty, wet pussy dripping on me, darlinâ.â
âLogan,â you whine, letting him move your hips back and forth. The pressure feels so good. You need more. âPleaseâŚâ You trail off, grinding down onto him.Â
âMaking a fucking mess of me, arenât you?â He teases, his fingers gripping your hips like iron, so tight he might bruise. âLove watching you get off on me.â His voice is dark and honeyed, smooth like expensive liquor. Your walls clench around nothing as your clit drags along Loganâs thigh and you moan, throwing your head back against his shoulder. âSo sensitive, arenât you?â
âYes,â you pant, letting him pull you back and forth. Youâll take anything you can getâanything heâs willing to give to you. âD-donât stop,â you beg.Â
âFuck,â Logan grunts. âNeed me that bad, huh?â
âY-you have no idea,â you stammer. He bites your pulse point as one of his hands wraps around your front, slipping inside your panties and finding your clit. âOh fuck, Lo,â you whine, the pads of his fingers drawing tight, rapid circles around the bud.Â
âThat feels good, pretty girl?â You can hear the smirk in his voice. He knows exactly what heâs doing to you, and heâs getting off on it. You can feel his erection hard against your ass every time his hips buck into yours. âBet it does, the way youâre soaking my thigh.â
âSo fucking good,â you whimper. But you know you need more. You need him. âLogan, pleaseâŚâ You trail off, the words escaping you as pleasure pulses through your body.Â
âPlease what, darlinâ?â He teases, his fingers pulling out of your panties, his hands gripping your hips again, rolling you against his thigh. Itâs not enough, and you groan at the loss of contact. âUse your words, sweetheart.â
âN-need more,â you croak, dragging yourself along him.Â
âMore what, beautiful?â But you know he knows. You know he wants to hear you beg for it, wants to hear you beg for him.Â
âMore of you,â you choke out.
âYeah?â He chides, slowing the roll of your hips with his iron grip. âMore of me how?â Heâs so goddamn cocky, so unfair.Â
âI-IâŚâ your eyes roll back into your head as he slowly, teasingly drags you up his thigh, pulling you against his erection and holding you there. âHowever you want me,â you whisper, pushing against his cock. âJust want you.â
He suddenly pulls away, his grip on your hips forcing you into the mattress as he rolls on top of you, caging you in, his hands on either side of your head.Â
Loganâs lips crash down onto yours, swallowing you hungrily, his teeth grazing your lower lip and licking away the pain. You part your lips, inviting him inside, tasting his tongue against yours. He slides a hand down your body, stopping at the hem of your shirt and yanking it up. He breaks the kiss to slip the shirt up and over your head, tossing it to the floor. He sits up on his knees, his eyes trailing your body, settling on your bare breasts.Â
âSo fucking beautiful,â Logan praises, lowering down over you, balancing on his forearm as his free hand glides up your side and to your breasts. He palms your flesh, rolling his thumb over your pebbled nipple, pinching lightly. âFuck, youâre perfect.â He traces across the valley of your breasts, his hand massaging the other side.Â
He grinds his hips into yours, his erection nudging against your core. âWanted you so bad, pretty girl,â he pants, pressing another kiss to your lips. His fingertips drag down your body, gripping your hip tightly again. âDreamed of fucking you, of tasting you.â He buries his face into the crook of your neck as he pushes you into the mattress, biting down on your pulse point. âTell me you want this. Tell me you want me.â
You moan as he sucks at your sensitive skin. âWant you, Lo. Need you,â you whine, your arms wrapping around his back, nails digging into his skin. âAlways wanted you.â
He kisses a trail down your neck, to your collarbone, between the valley of your breasts. He slides down your body, peppering light kisses across your stomach, stopping at the hem of your panties. He looks up at you, his face illuminated by the pale, blue moonlight. You can see the desperation in his eyes, the need. He licks his lipsâa man starvedâas his fingers hook into the waistband of your panties.Â
He tugs them down your legs, throwing them to the floor, and settles between your thighs. His face is just inches from your aching heat. Your chest heaves as he brings himself closer, his breath fanning across your cunt. You look down at him and find him staring up at you, watching your every move.Â
âWanna know what you taste like, darlinâ,â he huffs, his palms splaying on your inner thighs, spreading your legs wide open for him. âWant me to make you feel good?â His nails dig into the flesh of your thighs possessively.Â
âY-yes,â you stammer, already arching your back off the mattress. âPlease, Logan.â
He smiles, his eyes still trained on yours as his tongue swipes through your folds, long and slow, all the way up to your clit. âFuck,â he mumbles against your core, flicking your clit, lapping at it twice before starting all over again. He licks another teasing stripe through your folds, landing on your clit and taking the bud between his lips this time. He sucks roughly, releasing your clit and swirling soothing circles around it. âYou taste so perfect. Better than I ever imagined.âÂ
He laves at you, devouring you, his head buried against your cunt. His right hand climbs up your inner thigh, nearing your folds as his teeth graze your clit. Your hips jolt back at the sudden feeling, and Logan is quick to slide his left hand under your thigh. He grips tightly, yanking you back to him, and pressing his face deeper into your cunt. âDonât even think about it, pretty girl. Youâre not going anywhere until Iâm finished with you.âÂ
You moan at his words, his right hand finally working its way up to your folds. His fingertips find your entrance, spreading your slick. âSo fucking wet for me,â he murmurs, prodding your slit. âWant my fingers, darlinâ?â
âYes, Lo, please. Want all ofââ He thrusts two long, thick fingers deep inside you, down to his knuckles. âOh, fuck,â you cry out as he pulls out and slams back in.Â
His tongue swirls around your clit, his teeth grazing the bud every time he takes it between his lips to suck. Itâs overwhelming, overstimulating, the way he laps at you, drinking you in, consuming you. If he could find a way to keep your taste on his tongue all day, he would. If he could slip under your skin to be one with you, to feel your warmth, he would. You know this isnât want. This isnât lust. This isnât some one-off thing. This is need. This is longing.Â
Your eyes roll back into your head as he breathes you in, his tongue working at your clit as his fingers thrust in and out, dragging along your walls, scissoring inside you. âDoing so good for me, sweetheart,â Logan praises, and you clench down around him at the words. He smiles against your cunt. âYou like that, donât you? Like when I tell you just how good of a girl you are.âÂ
Your walls flutter around him again. âI-I do,â you admit, your voice shaky as he fucks into you, hitting that sweet spot inside you with every pump of his fingers.Â
Logan chuckles darkly, the reverberation pulsing against your clit. âThatâs my good girl, giving me what Iâve been waiting for,â he huffs, lapping at you, sucking on your clit like itâs candy. âWouldâve waited forever for you.â
Your muscles contract and release at his words, at the intimate confession. âWouldâve waited forever for y-you too,â you whimper, his fingers still working you open. Youâre so close. Fire burns at the base of your spine, your walls clenching around Loganâs fingers again as his tongue draws tight, rapid circles into your bud.Â
âNo more waiting, beautiful,â Logan grunts, and you know what he meansâhe knows youâre close. âWanna feel you come around my fingers, wanna taste it.â It isnât a request; itâs a command. His fingers plunge deeper, his tongue laving at your clit roughly between sentences. âKnow youâre ready to let go, sweetheart. Donât hold back. Come for me.â
Youâre crashing down, falling, but not into nothingnessâinto Logan, into his warmth, into his touch. Your chest heaves and the room spins. Heat pours from deep at the bottom of your belly, fire spreading up your spine. Nothing has ever felt like this. His name is the only thing you can think, the only thing you can say:Â Logan Logan Logan Logan.Â
His pumps slow down, his fingers dragging gently along your inner walls until he stills inside you and carefully pulls out. His tongue is still lapping at you, still working your overstimulated clit.Â
âLogan,â you whine, your hands finding his head, digging your nails into his scalp. âWant you.â
He smirks against you, knowing full well what heâs doing. âYou have me, darlinâ.â
You groan, half in frustration, half in pleasureâthe tension building back up between your thighs with every flit of Loganâs tongue. âPlease,â you beg, tugging on Loganâs hair. He grunts at the feeling, smiling against your cunt again. âI want you, Logan.â
âGotta be more specific, pretty girl,â he huffs, his face finally separating from your cunt. Your release glistens on his chin, his lower lip. He brings his fingers to his mouth as he waits, wrapping his lips around his fingers and sucking, savoring the taste of you.Â
âWant you inside meâŚâ You trail off, watching as his fingers pop out of his mouth, his tongue darting out along his lower lip, rationing every drop of you he can find. âWant your cock,â you finally choke out.
The corner of Loganâs mouth turns up, his fingers hooking into his boxers and tugging them down. âWanna fuck you so bad, beautiful,â he grunts, his cock springing free, bouncing against his stomach. Heâs so much bigger than you had anticipated. You swallow nervously as he lowers himself down over you, resting on his forearm. âThought about this for so long.â
His hand wraps around the base of his cock, guiding himself to your folds. He swipes through you, spreading your slick, notching against your clit. You moan at the contact, your chest coming flush with Loganâs as your back arches off the mattress. âLogan, please,â you beg. âJust want you. Only ever gonnaââ
He plunges deep inside you, down to the hilt with one thrust. Youâve never felt so fullâhis cock thick and long, splitting you open. His presses a kiss to your lips, swallowing your moans as his tongue darts out, tangling with yours. Heâs still inside you, stretching you out, allowing you to adjust to the size of him. âYou okay, pretty girl?â He asks as his lips part from yours.
âY-yes,â you stammer, your arms wrapping around his back. âFeels good. So big.â
Logan pulls out and thrusts back in, splitting you open again. âFuck,â he groans, his forehead resting against yours. âSo fucking perfect. So tight, so warm. Made for me, darlinâ.â Your eyes flutter open and closed as his free hand slips between your bodies, quickly finding your clit.Â
âLo,â you whine as his fingers draw tight, rapid circles into the bud. He sets his pace, pumping in and out of your cunt with reckless abandon. His hips rock against yours, the sound of skin slapping against skin echoing along the walls of the room.Â
âKnew youâd feel like this,â Logan soothes, flicking your clit as he fucks into you. âKnew youâd feel this good. Wanna be inside you forever, princess.â
His lips find yours again, his teeth tugging on your lower lip and then sucking the pain away. Itâs rushed and frantic, like heâs dying for more, searching for a way to reach deeper inside you, to feel all of you at once.Â
He ruts into you, his hips snapping, his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you with every thrust. He pinches your clit roughly, and your back arches off the mattress, your chest pressing against his.Â
âNo idea how much I wanted youâŚâ You trail off as his cock pounds into you. Heâs still stretching you out, still working you open.Â
Logan moans your name, his cock throbbing at your words. âWanted to fuck you that first night you came in here,â he whispers at the shell of your ear. âWanted you before that too. Knew I needed you the second I saw you.â
The confession rocks through you. You think of all those nights spent next to Logan, all those stolen moments. He wanted youâneeded you the whole time.Â
âLo,â you hiccup, his fingertips swirling your clit, his hips rocking against yours. He sinks deep inside, again and again, pumping in and out. Your walls flutter around his cock, dragging him in deeper.Â
âFuck, pretty girl,â he groans, sliding out and plunging back in. âSqueezing me so good, taking me so well.â
Tears brim in the corners of your eyes at the pure pleasure drumming through your bones. You know youâre close, know youâre almost unraveling underneath him. Logan flicks your clit, drawing hard, rough strokes around the bud. Youâre on fire, and youâre burning for him.Â
âLogan I-IâŚâ You stumble around your words, unable to form a coherent sentence as he pounds into you. Your walls flutter around him again, and his cock twitches inside you at the feeling.Â
He groans, your name on his tongue like a prayer. âI know youâre close, pretty girl.â He throbs inside you, and you know heâs almost there too. âWanna make you come again,â he grunts, pulling out and pumping back in. âKnow you have another one in you, sweetheart.â
Heâs right. You canât hold on much longer, but you want this moment to last. You want to feel his cock dragging along your walls, filling you up, splitting you open. You want his chest flush against yours. You want to feel the way he bites your lip and sucks away the sting he leaves behind. You want it allâall of himâand you donât just want it right now. You donât want this to be a fleeting moment. You want it to be forever.Â
âCome on, beautiful,â Logan pants, his pace faltering, his hips stuttering. He twitches inside you again. âFuck, you feel so good.â He strokes your clit, drawing those quick circles into the bud. âLet go for me. Know you want to,â he breathes, his forehead resting against yours. âIâve got you, sweetheart. Iâm not going anywhere.â
His words overwhelm you, and you let go. Itâs all more forceful this time, more powerful, your body trembling, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as wave after wave of pleasure tears through your body. It feels like blinding, searing heat, spreading like a forest fire.Â
Logan is right behind you, moaning your name, his cock throbbing against your walls. âGonna fill you up, pretty girl,â he husks, his chest heaving. You whisper a soft, pleading yes. âFuck, gonna make you mine,â he moans. His cock throbs again, and then heâs spilling inside you, filling you with his release.Â
His fingers rub gentle strokes into your clit, his cock slowly pumping in and out before stilling inside you. His fingers slip away from your clit, his hand traveling up your body, and rolling you over so that youâre side by side, facing each other. He pulls you into his chest, his cock still deep inside you.Â
Loganâs arms wrap around your back, caressing your bare skin, tracing patterns and shapes with his fingertips. He presses a kiss to the crown of your head as you bury your face into his chest.Â
âWanna stay inside you,â he mumbles against your hair. âWanna keep you close.â
âYou can,â you whisper, your heart hammering. âWanna stay close, too.âÂ
He presses another kiss to your head. âIâm not going anywhere,â Logan soothes, his fingers running up and down your spine. âGonna want you forever.âÂ
You lift your head to look up at him, his eyes immediately meeting yours. âForever?â You ask, but you know itâs a dumb question. You know heâs telling the truth.
He smiles and nods. âWouldâve waited for you forever,â he says, pausing, his throat bobbing as he swallows. âNever felt this way before, pretty girl. Never felt this real, this perfect. Donât wanna let you go.â
âDonât,â you whisper into the darkness of his room. âPlease.â
âI wonât,â he coos, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. âI wonât.â
His breathing steadies, and you listen to him like you do every night. Your eyes flutter shut, and you drift off to sleep with Loganâs cock deep inside you.
Forever. You think as your mind goes quiet and sleep drags you under. Forever.Â
Everlong.  Â
tags: @ricefordays-blog1 @galacticglitterglue @silversprings-mp3 @alsoprettyinpink @figsnpassionfruits @spiderset @prettyseaveins @ilysmdovie12 @starrdustss @wittyjasontodd @pedrohoe04 @fanfic-writing-barbie @evasmlp @derbygracie @cosmiccandydreamer @honeyfewr @movhoney @manipulatour @rammakela *I am so sorry if I forgot to tag you*
#Logan Howlett x reader#Wolverine x reader#James Logan Howlett x reader#Logan Howlett x reader smut#Wolverine x reader smut#James Logan Howlett x reader smut#Logan Howlett smut#Wolverine smut#James Logan Howlett smut#Logan Howlett x you#Wolverine x you#James Logan Howlett x you#Logan Howlett friends to lovers#Logan Howlett x you smut#Wolverine x you smut#James Logan Howlett x you smut#Logan Howlett x reader friends to lovers#Logan Howlett imagine#Wolverine imagine#James Logan Howlett imagine#X men imagine#Hugh Jackman#Deadpool and Wolverine#Logan Howlett fluff#Logan Howlett x reader fluff
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