#also the doctor one is someone ii know

[knot-doing-it]

this this this!!! people need to stop pretending that we're just a meat sack controlled by the brain! our muscles, organs, even skin have ways they manage and change that make up our personality. maybe you're friends doesn't go out much because they're introverted, or maybe they have ibs. maybe this person has a really cool sense of style, or maybe they're just anemic and need to bundle up all the time. maybe you're doctor is athletic because that's their interest that lead them to medicine or maybe they lose muscle tone unusual fast.

so many things about so many different kinds of media would be infinitely more interesting if we looked at the "human condition,, as more than just what's going on in our heads

Zombies shouldn't growl or snarl, they should babble a mixture of incomplete word sounds and whole words or sentence fragments. Every zombie should sound almost but not quite like it's trying to tell you something.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Sound II

Steph Catley x Baby!Reader

Summary: You're not having fun

You have decided that the weird things Mummy puts in your ears are annoying. You don't enjoy them at all. They're strange and weird and make things loud.

You don't like loud.

Loud is weird and you wish Mummy would just let the world be quiet.

You also wish Mummy would stop putting you on your belly. You used to do that in your old home until you could successfully lift your head up. Then you stopped.

You're not entirely happy that Mummy is making you do it again.

"Come on, angel," Steph coos at you," Just a little bit longer."

You're not the biggest fan of tummy time and Steph would prefer not to make you upset but she's working on getting you to crawl. Mini called just last week to say that Bubs has begun crawling and Steph doesn't want you to be left behind, hence tummy time.

"What's with the frowny face?" She coos," It's not really that bad, see?"

Steph lays on her tummy as well and your frown disappears a little bit as you stare at her. Steph just supposes you needed someone to do it with you.

You start giggling and you clumsily reach out with a hand to smack against her nose. Steph tilts her head up so she can lay a kiss on your palm that causes another wave of laughter from you.

You're a fairly giggly baby, at least compared to Bubs, and Steph could listen to your laughter for hours.

You kick your legs happily as Steph drags herself closer on her belly until she's close enough to layer kisses all over your face. Her phone chimes and she sits up.

"Tummy time's done!" She says to you, lifting you into her arms," You're such a good girl for doing it!"

You beam at her, legs still kicking out slightly before you're settled on her lap.

Now that you're free from the confines of your tummy time, you've decided you want to be free of the things in your ears.

You tug on them clumsily and Steph chuckles, covering your hands with her own.

"I'm sorry, angel," She says," But the doctors said you've got to wear them to get used to all the noise."

Mummy's been putting these things on you for a while now. Every day, she keeps them on for longer and longer. You tolerated it at first but now you think she's doing this just to annoy you.

You huff and blow spit bubbles at her so she knows you're annoyed.

Steph drags a cloth over your lips to clean them off and you huff again. She laughs a little at your face. Like every time you pull a frowny face or look mildly disgruntled, she has to laugh.

It's so out of place on your usually sunny features that Steph has no choice.

"Just a little longer," Steph promises you," And then we'll do something else."

She already knows what that 'something else' is. In the month or so since she's brought you home, Steph found very quickly that you've an affinity for music.

It had been a complete accident when Steph was cleaning while you were napping, putting some music on as she worked only to find you kicking your little legs in happiness to the beat.

You just adored music, even when you couldn't hear it. You routinely enjoyed being set up by the speaker and just resting your body against it, feeling the vibrations on your skin.

You still don't look very happy at still having to wear your hearing aids but this is one thing Steph won't relent on. You'll wear your hearing aids as long as the doctor recommends to get you properly adjusted.

Macca's assured her that this is the way to go. It's easier to adjust to the noise when you're younger than it is to do it when you're a teenager.

Steph's helping you in the long run, no matter what you think in this moment.

Her phone goes off with another alarm so you don't get the chance to make your anger more known. The frown absolutely disappears once you're set down in front of the speaker and Steph puts on some classical music.

You don't really mind what music is played, so long as you can play around and touch the speaker but Steph likes to think you like classical.

There's probably something about the vibrations that makes it different from pop music or any other genre.

You seem happy either way and Steph's content to just leave you there as she cleans up your scattered toys.

You've fully wedged yourself onto the speaker and Steph's left to briefly wonder how you've knocked it over and how you've managed to clamber on it at all when you've not even started to crawl yet.

It's impressive though and you mush your cheek against it and giggle as the vibrations echo through your body.

Steph has to laugh too, putting your toys away before plucking you from your position atop the speaker.

"That's a little too close," She tells you, standing it back up and moving you far enough away that you can only rest your little hand against it," This is better."

You huff.

It's fine. As soon as she leaves to get snacks, you'll go straight back to laying on it.

[noctxj]

hanahaki disease “… in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. It ends when the beloved returns their feelings, or when the victim dies…”

part i / part ii / part iii / part iv

˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.

agent who slowly withdraws from poly!tf141 after the first episode of bloodied flowers (realising they’re in love), from declining offers to relax in the rec room, accompany them to the local pub, or even working out in the gym to sparring.

agent knows that they’re not being subtle, see’s the guys try and figure what is going on with them. but agent refuses to let them find out—never.

agent who finally manages (after ensuring they wouldn’t hack up another flower) to file a notice, a formality really, to john— captain price, for their absence in the oncoming month or two. as there are no current operations needing agents’ immediate attention, its an opportunity for agent to get their other affairs in order after months being on base with the taskforce. 

john— captain price, briefly glancing at the document before focusing his ocean blue eyes to search agents (tired) face, a frown creasing between his full brows.

pleasedontlookatme—

whatdoyousee—?

the captain getting up from his seat to circle around his desk to stand before agent, his scrutinising gaze trying to catch agents downcast eyes.

pleasejohndont—

“this wouldn’t be about you pulling away from us recently hm?”

bullseye— 

agent could feel a thorn piercing the walls of her throat, their jaw tightening in response. a reaction john notices, his face softening as he reaches out to tip agents chin back to finally see his now gentle imploring eyes.

soblue—

“just don’t forget to come back to us, okay little love?”

little love. a pet name that simon (proudly) started to refer to agent amongst the taskforce (and no one else, lest they meet ghost in the middle of the night) while the others also followed suit—

“or would you rather shorty? or tiny even?” simon had smugly responded after seeing agents offended (blushing) face.

ugh that big oaf of a man, not everyone needs to be the size of an industrial fridge—!!

johnny and kyle chortling in the background, seemingly forgetting they’re suppose to be supervising the recruits’ training.

the pinch of another thorn dragging up their throat throwing agent back into the present.

“of course, captain.”

lies.lies.lies.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

agent whose kept a mental list of contacts who owe them favours, a debt that is finally being repaid: to find a cure for hanahaki disease. from the highest level of power and prestige in society, to the lowest trenches of the underworld. over the course of a few weeks, one by one, each contact falls short of delivering. but agent keeps digging. keeps searching.

there is never nothing. there has to be something somewhere. someone must have at least thought— until finally a contact (old friend) provides them with a lead. 

a doctor whose dedicated their life in medical research of hanahaki disease, searching for a cure— whispers that there is a cure. they’re located halfway across the world. but that doesn’t matter to agent, they’re leaving within an hour; flight booked and travel bag already packed.

washing the remnants of blood down the sink drain, tears wet on their cheeks. the episodes were happening more frequently.

agent is running out of time.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

“… it can be cured through surgical removal, but when the infection is removed, the victim's romantic feelings for their love also disappear…”

agent feels drained as the doctors words echo in their mind even hours after agents abrupt appearance in the doctors office. one look into agents (desperate) eyes and the doctor already knew why they had come, offered tea to soothe their throat (wash the metallic taste away, even if temporarily).

agent immediately coughing out both the tea, then one bloodied rose— then two— three— and finally four, as agent reaches to rip the tangled thorns from the back of their throat, ignoring the screaming pain of thorns dragging out of their mouth and past their stinging pale lips. 

the doctors face stricken with worry and sadness, trying to wipe the blood from agents face and hands; disposing of the thorny flowers in a sterile bin. the doctor concluding that agent does not have much time to deliberate if they wish to proceed with the experimental procedure. an incredibly invasive surgery that may not completely cure the victim; follow up surgery’s may be required. 

being split open from larynx to diaphragm, sown back together, only to be split open again if a single flower is coughed back up.

agent acknowledges this. pain is pain after all—

whats more to add to the pile?

˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.

tric’s notes

added some dialogue in this part compared to the first part. unedited, also like the first part. i know nothing about the complexities of surgery (google images my saviour) so don’t try to make sense of it haha.

thanks for reading!! ♡︎♡︎

crossposted on ao3 (same username!)

[fortheloveoflatinum]

Rewatching Star Trek DS9: Past Tense (The Bell Riots)

The thing I love most about time travel episodes is that the future hangs in such delicate balance. Also - the gentle reassurance that we matter. You matter. I matter. This isn't utilitarian calculus; it's a philosophy that holds that we all have immense intrinsic value and are all capable of shifting and shaping the course of the future.

Spock: [to Kirk] Save her, do as your heart tells you to do, and millions will die who did not die before. - Spock in the TOS Episode, "City on the Edge of Forever."

And Kirk, despite everything - despite his love for this woman, despite what his heart tells him to do - knows that in order to save the Federation and the future he has had such a magnificent hand in creating; if he wants a just and equitable future to be forged, it all hinges upon one small, 'insignificant' woman - it serves to show that the good of the many outweighs the good of the few - Kirk lets her die to save those millions of people - but also proves that the good of the few - or the one - can indeed outweigh the good of the many.

It's a simple, human truth that we are all significant in some way. When we go, it's not what we leave behind that matters - it's how we lived.

Captain Picard: Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives. But I rather believe than time is a companion who goes with us on the journey, and reminds us to cherish every moment because they'll never come again. What we leave behind is not as important how we lived. - Picard in the movie Star Trek: Generations.

And in the DS9 episode Past Tense: Parts I and II, this fundamental truth is also proven true. That one person - any person, every person - matters. Not because of the wealth they've accumulated, not because of their fancy house or their six-figure salary or their corner office - but because they smiled at a crying child, because they sparked hope in the hopeless, because they were kind, because they were generous with their time and because they lived to serve the greater good.

Life. It's not about what you own - it's about who you touch. Even transported to a barbaric 21st century too much like our own - with just the clothes on their back - even their combadges stolen - Doctor Bashir and Captain Sisko touch people. Their presence changes things. So much so that the ripples of their actions change the future for every Federation member, because Starfleet is gone and all that remains of it is the crew of the Defiant.

I remember the Ray Bradbury story, "The Sound of Thunder," with its eminent metaphor of stepping on a butterfly and altering the future. But what if we step on a butterfly in the present? Surely, the future is altered. Everything we do - matters. Everything we do has ripples across the timeline of the future. None of us are islands unto ourselves. This tangled web we weave, it's a tapestry and its threads are those of the people we've loved, everyone who we've ever known and whether we were cruel or kind to them matters.

What can you do? Start by smiling. A smile from a friendly stranger can save a life.

Michael Burnham [to Spock]: “There’s a whole galaxy of people out there who will reach for you. You have to let them. Find that person who seems farthest from you and reach for them.” - Michael Burnham in that one Discovery episode where they go to the future and also there's an epic war going on in the background

Reach for someone, anyone; everyone. Only then can they reach back for you.

Be kind, to the Earth, to each other, to all creatures. Don't step on butterflies or kill bees.

What can you do? Watch Star Trek, and live by Starfleet values. Find a moral compass, and let it guide you. Remember that science and education are the answer, just as much as peace on Earth and - eventually - beyond.

[pitchsidestories]

familia II Irene Paredes/Barça Femeni x Reader

masterlist I word count: 1991

a/n: based off this lovely request here. Thank you for sending us so many great requests !

You loved training camps with the FC Barcelona. They were always loads of fun. The players seemed happy and the weather was great. But this time, you were also painfully reminded how exhausting camp life could be. As the team doctor, you had to be there for their medical needs at all times and the past few days, the players had kept you quite busy. So busy, in fact, that you barely had time for your girlfriend.

In a quiet moment during your lunch break, your girlfriend snaked her arm around your waist and whispered into your ear: “Let’s do something tonight. Only us two.“

There was something impatient in her eyes as you turned towards her. You were glad to hear that she missed your alone-time as much as you did.

“Yes, that sounds great.“, you smiled.

The two of you did not even have the time for a quick kiss as another stumbled into the treatment room.

Patri stopped right in front of you and heaved an annoyed sigh: “Hey, Doc. We need an ice pack.“

“An ice pack? Patri, tell me quickly what happened.“, you urged her sternly.

As a response, the young midfielder rolled her eyes: “Claudias finger got trapped in the door. Nothing happened but she is pouting.“

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of that.“, you promised and took an ice pack out of the freezer.

“Thanks.“, Patri said while leading you and Irene to the injured player.

Claudia stood in front of the dressing room, holding her finger. Her brows were furrowed and for some reason, she reminded you of an oversized toddler.

“Claudia. I heard about the accident with your finger.“, you started and held out your hand so she would show you her finger.

While you examined her hand, she complained: “That was Patris fault.“

The older player took a deep breath in an attempt to protest but one look from Irene made her close her mouth immediately.

Her finger seemed fine but still, you could not stop yourself from hugging her: “Oh, Claudia. Do you need some ice?“

She nodded, her big blue eyes widened: “Yes.“

You handed her the ice pack: “You’re welcome.“

“I told you it wasn’t that bad.“, Patri scoffed, slightly annoyed.

“It’ll be alright.“, you promised them both before the two players disappeared into the dressing room.

Irene should have followed but instead her arms wrapped around your body once again. With a fond smile, she said: “Can’t wait for tonight.“

“Me neither.“, you replied happily but someone else quickly caught your attention.

Mapi was on the pitch and tried to do some tricks with the football. One of her knees was still in a brace after her meniscus injury.

Your heart sank for a moment, watching her rather reckless moves: “Mapi, be careful!“

“I’m fine.“, she answered nonchalantly, keeping her focus on the ball.

“Think of your knee, Maria!“, you yelled back at her.

As you had suspected, this got her attention. She stopped and grimaced at you: “Maria?!“

“So, you know I’m serious about it.”, you crossed your arms in front of your chest.

With a smirk on her face the defender tried to reassure you:” Calm down, I’m fine.”

“Please be careful with your knee, okay? It needs a bit more resting time to properly heal.”, you sighed.

She couldn’t help but to roll her eyes at your protectiveness:” Yeah, mum.”

“Don’t mum me, Maria. We’re only two years apart!”, you reminded her.

“Then stop acting like a mum.”, Mapi countered.

Quickly you corrected the football player: “I’m not, it’s my advice to you as a doctor.”

“Sure, mum.”, Mapi responded in a teasingly tone.

You groaned and demanded from her to stop it.

Grinning Irene who you haven’t noticed while having your talk with the younger player joined the conversation:” But our children would behave better.”

“Lies. They would do the same.”, the heavily tattooed Spaniard disagreed.

“I strongly believe they wouldn’t be as annoying.”, you joked as you exchanged knowingly looks with your girlfriend. You were able to communicate with each other without words which was helpful on and off the pitch.

The peaceful moment between you two was interrupted once again by a player, this time it was Mapi: “Yeah, they would.”

Afterwards she promised to be more careful with her knee. You knew how much you asked of her, as an athlete all they want to do is play with a ball at their feet. Every injury was a reminder that their time as football players was short and could end at any moment.

A bit later the rest of her teammates arrived in their training clothes. Watching Keira, you gasped out loud:” Oh my god, Keira. Have you forgot your sunscreen again?”

“Why? What do you mean?”, Keira frowned at you.

Frustratedly you pointed to the sky, the sun was still intense even in the afternoon:” It’s so sunny outside, you need to protect your skin.”

“Your nose is already getting sunburned.” Lucy stated matter-of-factly.

“You English always underestimate the sun here.”, you chuckled before handing Keira the sunscreen which has been in your bag for emergency cases like this.

The dark-haired defender who was half Portuguese protested smiling:” Hey, leave me out of this.”

“You need that sun protection too, Lucia.”, you remarked.

“Here, take it before you get in trouble.”, Keira whispered.

“Ugh fine.”, the older of the English players mumbled.

Satisfied you turned around only to be face to face to Barcelona’s captain who smirked at you:” Happy madre happy life.”

“Alexia not you too.”

“Just here to steal your girlfriend for the gym session.”, she winked at you.

“Alright, I’ll see you both at dinner. Time for me to look at the injured players.”, you announced.

With a warm smile Irene said:” Have fun.”

“You too.”, you answered. Although fun was a difficult wish to fulfil considering you had to take care of the women who were currently out of the game and they needed  extra care physically as well as mentally.

“Come on, Irene, you need to work on your muscles!“, Alexia teased as they walked side by side to the gym.

Irenes jaw dropped open: “Excuse me?!“

Alexia grinned back at her: “You heard me.“

“Go work on your knee instead.“, Irene laughed and playfully pushed her teammate in the direction of the gym doors.

Alexia rolled her eyes: “You sound like your girlfriend.“

“Someone has to tell you.“, Irene shrugged while starting with her workout plan under the supervision of one of the physios.

Her teammate followed suit: “Yeah, I know.“

The two football players worked in silence for a while until Alexia gave Irene an inquisitive look: “Were you serious about the children earlier?“

Surprised by the question, Irene paused her exercise and laughed: “About actual children? We already have you.“

“And?“, Alexia shrugged.

The defender continued to feign cluelessness: “And what?“

“Just letting you know that we’d be there for you two when you decide to have actual children.“

“Thanks. We appreciate that.“, Irene replied casually.

Alexia just smiled knowingly and focused on her workout again: “You’re welcome.“

Dinner was one of the few regular moments in camp when you and Irene had some time for each other. Her hair was still damp from the shower when she sat down next to you. She had the same satisfied expression her face that she always had after a good workout.

“Hi, how was your gym session?“, you greeted her while filling her glass with water, making sure she was adequately hydrated.

Irene gratefully took a sip before answering: “Good, really. But Ale was weird.“

“Weirder than usual?“

She softly chuckled: “Yes.“

“What did she do?“, you asked curiously.

Irene lowered her voice so the other players on your table would not hear her: “She said something about supporting us if we’d actually wanted to have children one day.“

“Wait, that doesn’t sound like Ale at all.“, you joked.

“No, it doesn’t.“

“Strange.“, you commented. Subconsciously, you looked at Alexia on the neighbouring table. A tablet was propped up in front of her while she ate. You assumed that she once again looked at video footage of games and training sessions. “Ale?“

She looked up in surprise: “Huh?“

“It’s not a match day tomorrow. Take a break, you don’t need to overwork yourself.“, you gently reminded her.

“I’m not.“, she protested, her eyes darting back to the screen.

You raised an eyebrow: “Promise?“

She gave a you a small smile: “Promise.“

“Okay.“, you sighed and turned back to your dinner.

Irenes elbow bumped against yours just as you were about to finish eating. She pointed outside the dining room window: “Y/n, want to go to the beach now? The sun is about to set.“

You carefully put your fork down and again glanced over to Alexia who was still focused on her screen: “Sure.“

“Come on, she’ll be fine.“, Irene smiled comforting at you.

After one last look at the captain, you admitted:” You’re right.”

With that said your girlfriend stood up, holding her hand out for you take it:” Let’s go.”

“Coming.”, you reassured her.

Silently you walked to the beach, enjoying each other’s company after a long workday. The sand was still warm underneath your feet even though the sun was about to set. The sky was pink and purple shaded.

Irene was the first to speak again:” It’s nice here.”

“I agree, also the calmness feels nice after such an eventful day.”, you replied, admiring the scenery in front of you.

The defender smirked at you:” Quite busy with our children, right?”

“Yeah, but I’d not change a thing about it. I love them.”, you confessed smiling fondly while thinking about the players.

“Me too. Mostly.”, she responded.

Amused you lifted an eyebrow:” Mostly?”

“They can be annoying.”, Irene shrugged her shoulders.

Slowly you agreed:” Yes, sometimes.”

“But I’d not swap them for anything else.”, your girlfriend replied in an honest tone.

Thoughtfully you nodded to her remark:” Me neither, they are family.”

“They are.”

As the waves crashed to the shore your lips touched for a heartfelt kiss. Afterwards you two still leaned your foreheads together, eyes closed, enjoying the moment.

“If we ever have real children, we’re well prepared.”, Irene whispered.

Hearing her saying this out loud made you yearn for a family of your own:” Yes, they would welcome them in immediately, I’ve no doubt about that.”

“I’m sure.”, she sounded sincere.

“Are you thinking about starting to try for children?”, you cautiously asked her.

Nervously the defender licked her lips:” I mean it’s a nice thought to have children one day.” For a moment Irene paused before adding, would you want that too?”

“I do, yes.”

Your girlfriends face lit up with giddy excitement:” So we’re trying it?”

“Yeah, we’ll.” Suddenly you were interrupted by her teammates who were running towards you.

“What?”, startled Irene looked at them.

Equally confused you wanted to know from the other women:” Girls, what’s going on?”

“It’s time to celebrate.”, Patri declared grinning.

Curiously you continued: “To celebrate, what?”

“Just to celebrate.”, Alexia waved it off beaming.

Baffled Irene turned to the midfielder who she has been friends with for a very long time:” Ale, were you guys listening to us the whole time?!”

“Maybe.”, she answered with an innocent smile.”

“So, yes. God that’s so embarrassing.”, you groaned.

Empathically Marta padded your shoulders:” We especially loved the family part.”

“Agreed.”, Alexia said.

“It’s simply the truth.”, you told them, your cheeks burning red.

“Guys that was private.”, Irene huffed at her teammates.

This made Mapi roll her eyes:” Oh please, nothing stays private during training camp.”

“Maybe we hate you now.”, you teased her.

“No, you love us.”, Patri shook her head.

With a sigh you gave in:” Yeah, fine, we do.”

Because those women were more to you than just people you worked with, they were family.

[scientia-rex]

Wound Care

Ok so, take this with a BIG grain of salt, because I may be a medical doctor BUT you need to know how much wound care training we get in medical school: none. Zip. Zilch. There may be medical schools where you do, but mine wasn't a bozo factory and there was NO wound care training. Everything I know I learned from one of several sources: an intensive 2-day wound care course I did in residency (highly recommend), the local Home Health wound care nurse (highly recommend), a completely batshit insane old white male doctor who started our learning sessions by yelling Vietnam War stories at me (do not recommend), a hospital wound care nurse (highly recommend), and experience (oh god do not recommend).

The first thing you need to know is that wound healing varies dramatically across the course of a lifespan. Kids? Kids will heal. If they don't, get their ass to a pediatrician because there's something genetic going on. Young adults will heal. Middle-aged adults will heal. You know who doesn't heal for shit? The elderly, and people with severe illnesses, and people with uncontrolled type II diabetes.

Your body needs several things in order to heal. It needs macronutrients, so you need to be able to EAT protein, fat, and carbs. If you are on total parenteral nutrition, aka TPN, aka IV nutrition, you are going to be worse at healing. If you are starving yourself, you are going to be worse at healing. If your body is desperately funneling all the calories you take in to surviving your COPD or cancer, you are going to be worse at healing.

It also needs micronutrients. If your diet sucks, you won't heal. Take a multivitamin once in a while.

There are two CRITICAL skin components to healing: collagen and elastin. Guess what we stop making as we age. Promoting collagen isn't just good for "anti-aging," it's good for NOT ripping your skin apart. Taking oral collagen is probably bullshit because your body is going to have to disassemble it to get it across the intestinal membranes to absorb, but it's also harmless, and if your diet REALLY sucks, who knows. Give it a try. Collagen is made of amino acids; think protein.

Another absolutely crucial component is blood flow. As people age, they start to develop cholesterol plaques lining arteries that eventually pick up calcium deposits. This makes blood vessels less elastic, which is a problem, but eventually also blocks them off, which is a much bigger problem. If someone has the major blood flow to their feet decreased by 90% by arterial stenosis, they are not going to heal for shit AND their foot's gonna hurt.

One component of blood flow I hadn't thought about before going into medicine is fluid retention. The way your body works, blood exits the heart at a very high velocity, but slows to a crawl by the time it gets into capillaries, the smallest blood vessels in the body. Water is a very small molecule and can leave the blood vessel, especially if there aren't big, negatively-charged molecules like proteins like albumin in the blood vessels to hold the water there. And we're built for this--some water is supposed to leak out of our blood vessels when it gets to real little vessels. It gets taken back up by the lymphatic system and eventually dumped back into the bloodstream at the inferior vena cava. But if you aren't making albumin--for instance, in liver failure--you may leak a LOT of fluid into the tissue, so much that your legs get swollen, tight, the skin feeling woody and strange. This isn't fixable by drainage because the fluid is everywhere, not in a single pocket we can drain. And because it puts so much pressure on the tissues of the skin, it often results in ulcers. Congestive heart failure, liver failure, kidney failure--these are all common causes of severe edema, aka swelling due to fluid in the tissues. And they're a real bitch when it comes to wound care, because we have such limited resources for getting the fluid back out, which is a necessary first step to healing.

Pressure is another common cause of wounds. Pressure forces blood out of those little capillaries, so you starve the cells normally fed by those capillaries, and they die. It's called pressure necrosis. Very sick people who can't turn themselves over--people in the ICU, people in nursing homes--are especially prone to these wounds, as are people with limited sensation; pressure wounds are common in wheelchair users who have lost some feeling in the parts of their bodies that rub against those surfaces, or diabetics who don't notice a rock in their shoe.

So, if you're trying to treat wounds, the questions to ask are these:

Why did this wound happen?

-Was it pressure? If it's pressure, you have to offload the source of the pressure or else that wound will not heal. End of story. You can put the tears of a unicorn on that thing, if you don't offload the pressure it won't heal.

-Was it fluid? If it's fluid, you have get the fluid out of the issues or else it won't heal. You can sometimes do that with diuretics, medications that cause the body to dump water through the kidneys, but that's always threading a needle because you have to get someone to a state where they still have juuuuust enough fluid inside their blood vessels to keep their organs happy, while maintaining a very slight state of dehydration so the blood vessels suck water back in from the tissues. You can use compression stockings to squeeze fluid back into the vessels, but if they have arterial insufficiency and not just venous insufficiency, you can accidentally then cause pressure injury. The safest option is using gravity: prop the feet up above the level of the heart, wherever the heart is at, at that moment, and gravity will pull fluid back down out of the legs. Super boring though. Patients hate it. Not as much as they hate compression stockings.

-Was it a skin tear because the skin is very fragile? This is extremely common in the elderly, because they're not making collagen and elastin, necessary to repairing skin. If this is the case, make sure they're actually getting enough nutrition--as people get into their 80s and 90s, their appetites often change and diminish, especially if they're struggling with dementia. And think about just wrapping them in bubble wrap. Remove things with sharp edges from their environments. I have seen the WORST skin tears from solid wood or metal furniture with sharp edges. Get rid of throw rugs and other tripping hazards. I had somebody last week who tried to a clear a baby gate and damn near destroyed their artificial hip.

The next critical question: why isn't it healing?

-Are you getting enough nutrients? Both macro and micro?

-Are you elderly?

-Are you ill?

-Do you have a genetic disorder of collagen formation?

Fix why it's not healing and almost anything will heal. If you're diabetic, find a medication regimen that improves your sugars and stick to it. If you're anorexic, get treatment for your eating disorder. If you have congestive heart failure, work with your doctor on your fluid balance. Wear the damn pressure stockings. Prop up your feet.

If, after those two unskippable questions are done, you want to do something to the wound--apply a dressing, do a treatment--that's a whole other kettle of fish. I'll write that later. The dryer just sang me its little song and I need to put away the laundry.

[loveandmurders]

The Sun of Ambrose II (Sinclair daughter!reader)

Hello everyone, this is the second part of a new Sinclair!daughter AU in which the reader is Bo's daughter and she has been taken away and adopted by a new family.

This is the direct continuation of this.

Hope you'll enjoy! <3

Warnings : No proof reading, angst, mentions of a boy groping, touching and wanting to rape reader, killer!reader, violence, blood, anger, manipulation.

Your grandfather and grandmother were killers. 

Your father and uncles were killers. 

Even if you didn’t know about all of this yet, it was written in your blood, in your DNA. You were born to be a killer too. You were born with this rage and with this skill. You were born to be something else than just normal. 

You weren’t a lost little girl anymore.

You were 16. 

You were doing your best to have the life your adoptive parents wanted you to have; you were good at school, you had friends, you were going out to parties. You were mute so things could sometimes be a bit difficult, but you were enjoying watching people in silence. You knew everyone’s secrets and dramas. You knew people’s weaknesses and desires.

So you knew when John came to greet you one morning, he didn’t have good intentions towards you. 

“Hello sweetheart. It’s been a little while since I've noticed you. We’re in the same maths class by the way. You remember me?” he said and you nodded to let him know you did remember him. He brightly smiled “Awesome. So, my friends are organising a party on Friday night and I’d love you to come with me” he offered.

You licked your lips and leaned into your seat, wondering what to do. He was towering over you and everything in his gestures showed he was acting like a predator. He probably thought that since you were mute, you would be a very easy prey.

You weren’t too happy to put yourself into danger, but at the same time you were bored out of your mind and your parents would be happy if you would go out with a boy. It would be another proof that you were settling in your life and that everything was going alright. And as long as you were wearing your sun necklace, you weren’t afraid for yourself. 

You finally nodded again and his smile turned into a smirk.

“Brillant, girl. See you on Friday’s night. I’ll come get you at your place” he said before leaving. 

He really wasn’t interested in you in a good way. 

You neither.

Your mother was really excited for you so she helped you get ready for what she was calling a “date”. You dolled up like you were supposed to before leaving the house without feeling anything. Your parents reminded you to be careful. 

Little did they know that at the instant you got into John’s car, he placed his hand on your thigh and groped you. You softly pushed him and gestured for him to drive to the party, which he finally did.

You were annoyed. 

Once at the party, he quickly greeted the people he knew, keeping you by his side like you keep a pet. You hated it. You started to get angry. It was a quiet anger you knew a little too well. You did everything to keep it manageable inside your heart. You couldn’t have a crisis here, in front of those people you were going to school with. You didn’t want your parents to get you to the doctors again.

You kept a smile on your face, even when he rushed you upstairs and found the closest empty bedroom he could. He hushed you inside, before locking the door behind you two.

“Ah finally alone, baby” he mused

You knew what his intentions toward you were but you weren’t afraid, you were oddly calm as you watched his every move. The fact that someone would want to hurt you and use you was making you burn with anger now. You had never felt so full of rage, and yet it was the cold madness of a killer that was taking possession of you. You knew what was going to happen, but you also knew you weren’t the prey. 

Your father and uncles started to teach you how to take care of yourself, how to kill, even if they never said it was for killing. It was always to protect yourself from “the bad people of this hostile world”. You had continued to learn how to fight without your parents knowing.

And even if you had never shed blood before, you were ready. The rage was too strong to make it stay inside of you. You smiled as the boy came closer to you, clearly not realising he was the mouse, and not the cat. He touched you and you let him do it, at first. 

“I knew you were going to be a good girl” he murmured to you and you hummed in answer. You gently grabbed him by the hair before your grip tightened and without a warning shot you moved to the side and brutally led his head against the wall. You hit him hard and he got disoriented. You continued to hit him over and over again.

You killed him. 

You killed him violently. And you felt good, oh so good. For the first time in years, the anger quieted down and you felt like you could finally breathe. 

You cleaned up the crime scene, your bloody hands and face, and his body before leaving it where it was. Your black dress was hiding the blood stains littering it but you knew you would need to burn it down once you would be back home. You went downstairs to dance with the others, as if nothing had happened. 

The body was found only when everyone thought it was time to go to sleep.

Of course the police interrogated you, but they couldn’t believe that such an innocent looking girl, who went through so much in her life already and was hence very soft, could have killed someone with such hatred. Your parents were so relieved nothing happened to you, not realising you were the danger. 

No one even found out who killed John.

And you found this very exciting.

So you continued to kill.

You realised you were very good at it, as if it was a gift running through your veins. Whenever you felt anger, you left your house at night for a “little walk”. You would easily find a new prey; anyone was good enough for it. It was also why the police couldn’t find you: there was no link between your victims, not even their profile. You killed for the sake of it, for the well being it finally gave you. You were known as the “serial killer of the shadows”. Your parents always worried when you were wandering around at night, not realising you were the danger prowling around the city. 

Killing wasn’t the only joy in your life, even if it was getting a big part of it. Around the same time you murdered John, you asked your parents to take up art classes. You wanted to do sculptures, to build things with your hands. You enjoyed doing pottery a lot. It was appeasing you because you could just focus on your hands and on your art. You were very good at it, mostly because you watched Vincent making art a lot so his gestures were written inside your brain.

You started to work on wax as well. You asked your parents to buy you the materials and they agreed. They were happy you were expressing yourself through art. It was certain you were doing better now. They had no idea that you simply still wanted to be Sinclairs’ heir. You wanted to find them again one day, and to prove to them that you were the only daughter they needed. You wanted to come back home more than anything. You knew your "real" father would understand your anger. You weren’t too sure if he and your uncles were killing the tourists, but you were certain they wouldn’t judge you for your night activities. You would be free in Ambrose… You just needed to find your way back to it.

And one day, it happened.

“So, Y/N, where would you like to go during the holidays this summer?” your adoptive father asked you as you were all having dinner in the living room. You had meant to talk to them about your biological family for a quite a while now and it felt like the perfect moment.

“I want to go in the South of the country” you replied and your parents were surprised you seemed so determined about it

“Why there?” you mother hummed

“Because I come from there… I want to find where I come from. I want to find what happened to my mother… I mean I want to know if she was right about my father”, you explained

“I’m not certain this is a good idea, hon” your mother instantly replied and you pouted, disappointed but ready to fight for it

“Why not?”

“We… We haven’t told you about all the stories we heard about your family. Your mother had the time to say quite a lot about them and the fact you weren’t even officially existing for the State is proving a lot. You were a child so you probably don’t remember or didn’t understand what was going on…” she babbled

“What you mother means is that they are dangerous people and we can’t just go find him” your father added

“This is unfair. I need to know my past. If you were at my place, wouldn’t you want to know the truth?”

The discussion stopped there for the moment but a few days later, your parents offered you a deal. The plan was you would all go to the South of the country for some holidays. You would try to find the region where you came from, but you wouldn’t try to find your father. You agreed. 

The problem was you didn’t know exactly where Ambrose was, but you had found your uncle Lester’s town on a map. At least you thought you remembered it was. Your mother and you found somewhere nice with a cute little hotel around the area you wanted. You hope to find your way back home… and to find your family again. You had changed quite a lot and you weren’t too sure your family would recognise you. However, you were still wearing your sun necklace.

You thought the day of the trip would never come, as you were so excited about it. You could feel in your bones that you were finally coming back home, so many years after having left it. Your parents were a little bit on edge, but they loved you too much to cancel the holidays. Your mother had a very bad feeling about all of it.

However, once on the roads, you couldn’t help but panic when the car went by on the dusty roads without going by the advertisements for the House of Wax. You remembered them by heart as you saw them quite a lot when you were in Lester’s truck. You worried you would come by close to Ambrose but not close enough. You worried you wouldn’t find your family. You worried everything was lost forever. Your adoptive parents noticed how you looked around and they asked you if you were alright.

“I come from here” you admitted to them as you signed. They exchanged a very concerned look at those words.

“Are you sure? You recognised this place? Your mother asked you in a soothing manner

“Not really, but the roads were the same when I was a child. It’s not here, but it must be in this area. My family is so close by now” you replied

“Hon… We are your family” your mother frowned

“You know what I mean… I want to see them, I want to see my dad again” you shyly signed, knowing your adoptive parents wouldn’t be happy about it. They did exchange another look, full of concern.

“We already talked about it… We want you to be safe and… your biological father didn’t seem like a good person. We don’t want you to meet up with him… and certainly not like that” your mother continued as your father stopped the car and parked.

“You don’t know him, we don’t know if my mother said the truth. He never hurt me when I was a child” you said

“You didn't know him either. What your mother did…” she trailed off

“But now we’re here, we can have a look around” your father offered to your mother’s dismay. 

They argued in whispers until you left the car. 

You recognised the violent heat of the sun hitting you, you recognised how silent the road was, you recognised how easy it was to get lost and in need of help here. You had to be close to Ambrose, you could feel it in your heart.

“Let's get back in the car, honey. We’ll go to the hotel we booked and we’ll talk some more about all of this. It’s understandable you want to find your father, even just out of curiosity… But you cannot just come over like that. You don’t know how he would react, what he became after you left… We need to respect a process” your mother rationalised and you were forced to agree with her.

A little voice inside your head wondered what would happen if your family didn’t recognise you? Would they kill you like they probably got rid of the tourists during your childhood?

And yet, you prayed for the car to stop working or for Lester’s truck to appear on the road. Unfortunately, you safely travelled to the hotel. You all ate at a restaurant before deciding to go to sleep and to talk about everything the day after. Your parents thought it was better to rest and have a good night sleep before doing anything. They might hope you would calm down as well.

You didn’t. You talked about finding your dad right at breakfast.

“I could find my father” you said

“It has been said that you didn’t know where you came from exactly and that you didn’t even know your father’s name.” your mother said “Did you lie about all of this? Did you try to protect him somehow?” she continued and you hated to be trapped in your own lie

“I didn’t know back then. But when I saw the roads, I remembered” you replied

“Makes sense,” your father nodded and gently smiled at you.

“I don’t like this,” your mother whined. She had always been very protective of you and she felt something was off.

“Look, darling, we’re going to find a solution for everyone to be happy.” your father continued to smile “The two of you are going to have a nice day out together and I’m going to look for your biological father. If you can just show me on the maps where he used to live… And if I can find him, I’ll talk with him and make sure he is good enough to meet with you. How does it sound?” he offered

“It’s rushed! He was a violent man, how do you know he won’t hurt you, hurt her?” your mother continued 

“If you don’t have news after an hour, you’ll call the police. Y/N needs to realise who her father is to move on in her life. That’s normal. Everyone needs to know and understand where they come from. And even if it’s rushed, even if it doesn’t sound like a good plan, she needs it now. We have to try.” your father replied. 

“This is too risky. We can ask for the administration to help us with this… Especially if he is a bad man. It’s indeed important but we need to take our time.” your mother argued back so you started to cry. 

It was always your most efficient weapon. 

It was settled then.

Your adoptive father would look for Bo Sinclair.

--

Part III

--

Taglist: @murder-hobo - @lacychick ; @magical-sass ; @limehaspassed ; @loveinglymessedup ; @bloodmoon-bites ; @iwantsleepplz ; @kawaistrawberry21 ; @12gaugefalls ; @kriston1210

[lpham2525]

Misunderstanding: Part II

[YOR is waiting up for LOID one night when both he and FRANKY come into the flat. LOID has a limp so severe that FRANKY has to help him through the door.] 

YOR: Loid! Franky! What happened?! 

FRANKY: Easy, easy. Let him sit down first.  

YOR: Should I call for an ambulance? 

TWILIGHT: No, no. It’s not that bad. I’m just...sore. That's all.  

TWILIGHT (grunts as he sits on the couch): Ah, much better. 

YOR: Loid, what’s going on? What happened to you?

TWILIGHT (sighing): Yor, there's something I need to tell you.  

YOR: W-what is it?  

TWILIGHT: Well, I’ve been pulling a lot of late nights recently, and I think I should let you know that... 

FRANKY (impatient): Your husband’s fucking Twilight.  

YOR: T-TWILIGHT?! Th-the Westalian spy?! 

TWILIGHT: ... 

TWILIGHT: Franky, can you give us a moment alone?  

FRANKY: And miss this?! No way!  

TWILIGHT: *gives him the Twilight Glare*

TWILIGHT: Franky... 

FRANKY: Okay, okay. I’ m going. I’ll see ya later...if you survive this.  

[After FRANKY leaves, TWILIGHT turns back to YOR.] 

TWILIGHT: Yes...it’s true.  

YOR (in shock): If that’s true, then...that’s why he never developed romantic feelings for me! My husband’s...gay! How could I have not seen it?! The signs were all there!  

YOR: So your first wife... 

TWILIGHT: Never existed.  

YOR: And Anya? 

TWILIGHT: Adopted.  

YOR: Does, erm, does Anya know about Twilight?  

TWLIGHT: No. I made sure to keep it well hidden from her.  

YOR: Hmmm....maybe because Anya might tell someone at school? I can’t imagine a traditional school like Eden would be welcoming to a gay father. Well, regardless... 

YOR: Loid, I want you to know that I support you.  

LOID: You...you DO?!  

YOR: Yes, I don’t think it’s shameful at all, and it’s sad we live in a society where you can’t express that part of yourself.  

LOID: I don’t think that it’s shameful, but...I also have no desire to express that part of myself. It would make my life—and my job—so much harder if people knew. My identity must remain secret. 

YOR: Well, I can understand about your job. Some people might not trust a doctor if they knew of...other things he dabbled in. And I also understand that kind of...alternative lifestyle requires secrecy. People are tortured and killed for these kinds of things after all. 

LOID: I’m glad you understand. I'll be honest, though, I am bowled over by your support. This was not the reaction I expected.  

YOR: What did you expect?  

LOID: Crying. Screaming. Cursing. Slapping me. Reporting me.  

YOR: Oh no, Loid. I would never report something like this. I mean, for a while, I suspected my brother of the same thing, but I would never report him for being who he is so...why would I do that with you?  

LOID: You suspected your brother of being Twilight?  

YOR: Oh no, I didn't suspect him of being Twilight, but of having the same sexual inclinations that you do. And who was I to judge? I love my brother and I support him, the same way I support you and whatever you want to do with your life. 

LOID: The same sexual inclinations? I don’t know what you’ve heard about me, but I had times when I slept with other women only because I needed to— 

YOR: Blend in. I know. It’s okay.  

LOID: She knows I needed to blend in for my honey traps! She really is the sharpest person I’ve ever met! 

LOID: But it was never anything personal. 

YOR: I understand. I’m sure they do too.  [beat]

LOID: So your brother has also... 

YOR: It's possible. Likely, even. 

LOID: I didn't know the SSS did that kind of thing. Or maybe he had to honey trap someone for an assignment? Or could he be a spy? Maybe he's a mole like Wheeler! A spy for some agency but posing as SSS? Wait, I had Franky check his background. Maybe we missed something somewhere... 

LOID: Yor, while I appreciate your support, I’d like you to keep this a secret. Don’t tell anyone. Especially your brother.  

YOR (putting her hand over her heart): I promise to not tell anyone. Oh, and Loid?  

LOID: Hmm? 

YOR: The next time you have to “work late”, you don’t have to hide it from me. I know what you’re doing now and again, I support you.  

YOR: *fidgeting* 

YOR: I do have a question, though. 

LOID: Yes? 

YOR: Is Twilight always so... 

YOR: *gestures to Loid’s limp leg* 

YOR: Rough? 

LOID (chuckling): Not always. Some nights are just...more intense than others, let’s put it that way.  

YOR: Okay, but please be careful. I don’t want you hurt. 

LOID: I’ll be careful. I promise. 

LOID: I can’t believe I have such a supportive wife! It doesn’t make much sense, but I’m not complaining! 

YOR: I can’t believe I have a gay husband! Everything makes so much sense now!

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Cold as ice II

a/n because why not take an opportunity to cry some more. I am so thankful for all the love honestly! You guys are the best!✨🤍

summary: what happens when Ellie stumbles upon a memorial that turns out to have both your and Joel's kids names on it. When the past pain is brought back to the daylight even the coldest of hearts finally break.

This can be read as a standalone but is written as a part two to Cold as ice.

warning: Killing, mentions of multiple death, loosing your kids, supplement use, mention of miscarriage, trauma but I think this is not as bad as the first part lol.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"How is she?", Tommy approached Joel in a tight corridor that was filled with both sobbing people and soldiers shouting. "The same," Joel ran a hand over his face, "They are moving everyone out of here today. To a different quarantine facility." Those words instantly sparked something in Joel. "What? Shit, she's still pumped up with meds", if the process of going there was as torture as it was getting here, you barely stood a chance.

"Joel", Tommy started, but Joel was all up at his face within a heartbeat, "Tommy, if you'll tell me one more fucking time to leave her by. I will blow out your brain's myself". The tone was anything but pleasant. Joel had been wanting to rip someone to pieces for some time now. He had beaten the stranger to a pulp here after the first day. The man was standing in front of the door that led to your room. Crunched down to look through the little window. Joel didn't ask questions; he just swung a punch. Nor did he remember much besides that when Tommy pulled him away, the man was nothing but a pool of blood.

"You know that's not what…", "She lost two kids…", Joel's words cracked mid-sentence as the thought of his two angels once again swirled in his mind. His biggest and most precious little bugs were taken away like that. "So did you, man", Tommy brought Joel closer to him. Joel's arms moved to grip the material of his brother's jacket. He didn't want to cry, but the sob had come out of nowhere. The past three days have been a nightmare and then some. Now Joel was sure that he was paying for all of his sins. Paying in the most brutal ways.

Dragging you away from the field was the second hardest thing Joel ever had to do. He could only pray that his arms would not let him down as he pressed you closer to his body. Joel wasn't sure what they injected into your neck once you reached an army van and practically ripped out the eyes of the soldier who tried to help you into the vehicle, but you collapsed immediately. Joel barely managed to catch you. He pressed your unconscious body against his. Just like he had for the past hour or so. Praying and hoping that you weren't gone. Joel couldn't lose all three of you. Now you were all he had to fight for. No matter how much pain he was in himself. Joel had to drag you both out of the darkness.

Then he sat in the chair next to your bed. If you could even call it that. When they had ushered everyone underground, Joel had bribed a nurse to give you three a room and make sure that a doctor would come to check you. At that time, the price didn't matter. He needed an answer. Needed to know that you were going to wake up. High dose of sedatives - the doctor had said. "But I doubt it'll keep her out for long. After two kids… My apologies. If I'll find any medication", he had placed a supportive palm on Joel's shoulder. Something that would also end up feeling so foreign soon.

If Joel thought seeing you unconscious was difficult, it didn't compare to the heartbreak he had to endure the moment you opened your eyes. You jolted with a gasp. Eyes jumped across the room as you tried to figure out where you were. "Love…", Joel stood up, slowly approaching you. "Sarah… Malakai," you murmured as you continued to look around. "How about a glass of water, huh?", Joel asked, hoping to sway the topic. But you pushed the blanket off your body. "Sarah and Malakai," you repeated. Joel clenched his jaw. "Sarah and Malakai," "Love, stay in bed," Joel put his hands on your legs, stopping you from pushing them over the edge. "Sarah…Malakai", you said once again, eyes looking up at Joel, "They killed them. I saw… I saw," you breathed out, pressing a finger to your forehead where the bullet had pierced your son's skull. "I know, baby, I know", Joel tried to gently hold onto you, but the moment his palms touched your arms, you let out the loudest scream. Pushing him away as you turned to the other side of the bed. You dragged your feet over the cold concrete. Sinking to the floor without even being able to take a step forward. Joel rounded the bed as he kneeled in front of you.

"They are dead," you cried out, pulling at Joel's shirt, "My babies… I need to go, I need to…", you tried to pull yourself up by using Joel to brace yourself, but that only made you glance down at your hands, which were still slightly stained by the dried blood that had been on them. "Y/N, you need to calm down. Or they will come in here and", but you paid Joel no mind as you pulled your hands up so you could look at them.

"Get it off," you whispered, "Get it off," pushing your arms towards Joel as you screeched. Joel had scrubbed your unconscious body for hours. There was nothing more he could do. "Joel, get it off," you said once more, tears spilling from your eyes, and Joel couldn't bring himself to do anything. "It's everywhere, get it off", you moved your hand to rub at your skin. All you saw was blood. Blood everywhere. Rubbing turned into scratching, and soon your nails were raking over your skin. Joel quickly caught both of your wrists in his hands. Shaking you slightly as if in hopes of making your return to your senses. "Make it stop", you cried out, hallow eyes looking at Joel. "There's nothing on your hands, love", he barely managed to sound somewhat like himself. But you just shook your head at him, "There's blood all over them. Our kids' blood, Joel."

That was a day ago. Now you just lay there. Leafless. No movements. Eyes blinking once in a while. The only indication that you were still alive. Now Joel wished you would scream. The silence was torture. It was too loud. It pulled you so far away from him. Tommy clapped his brother on the back a couple of times before pulling away. "Get her ready. I'll look at how to get the best spot for you and make sure you two stay together," Joel said nothing. He hoped his eyes said enough. "You look after her. We'll get her back up on her feet," Joel could tell that even if Tommy tried to keep it somewhat positive, he didn't fully believe it himself. Didn't believe that there was any coming back from this. Nor did he believe that you would ever be the same. But Joel nodded anyway.

"Hey", Joel ran a hand over your forehead, once he stepped back into the little room, but didn't get a single movement in return. Not that he was expecting it. "We will have to get you dressed, okay? Then we'll need to go somewhere," Joel said, carefully pulling the blanket off your body before reaching for your clothes. Clothes he had washed. Wash off your kids' blood. Blood that seemed never-ending.

You were shivering. It hadn't stopped ever since you were brought in the first QZ. It had died down a bit. But there wasn't a moment when the quivering stopped. Joel pressed a kiss to your forehead as he walked through the corridor. Everyone was on high alert, and the soldiers were tired. Jumpy even. More than one person was killed here simply in the aftermath of unimaginable stress and anxiety. They only let healthy, strong people stay. Anyone with any injury, even the slightest one, was shot. You needed to stand on your own two feet. Walk through the lines of different specialists. Prove yourself worthy of surviving. And even that didn't guarantee you anything. You could have been hit by a bullet at any point.

You, however, were in no condition to stand. There was no way you could walk, much less talk. "Keep your head at the crook of my neck, love", Joel guided your head to rest there, "I will not let go of you even for a second. No one who will approach us will take you away from me," and at this point, Joel wasn't sure if he was still reassuring you or if it had turned to self-reassuring now. With the help of the doctor who assisted you just as you were brought here. They filed the documents of you having a miscarriage. Right here at the QZ. A piece of paper that had the main doctor's signature and forbade you from walking. That had high dosages of medicine marked as a fallacious move by the doctor itself. That you were more than a healthy female before that, and that you would regain that strength once the medication wore off. The only hope Joel had of getting you out of here alive was that piece of paper. And if that didn't work… Well, Joel was ready to kill anyone who stood in his way.

"Joel," Ellie's sad voice pulled the male out of the trance, "Sorry, I don't know why I'm telling you all of this." Joel rested his palms on his knees, ready to stand up, but Ellie quickly inched forward. It seemed to her that the man in front of her was no longer the same Joel she knew. "How did you… how did you get through that?", she knew the question was stupid. Joel let out a sad chuckle followed by a painful sigh, "You don't even have an idea how much strength you have until you are forced to use it. That's when you truly see your power". Joel had locked his pain away. Behind a plethora of locks, doors, and crevices. So no one could see it. No one could access it. Draped a shield of coldness on top of it. The coldness made Joel seem more like an animal than a human. He had to become a monster in order to protect the only thing that kept his heart beating. Nothing was off-limits when it came to you.

"I felt like I was failing every day. Every day that I saw her lying there," Joel shook his head at the images that haunted him. The feeling of helplessness flowed through him. Joel had found a woman who could pretend to be you for the time being. Who could take your evening shifts. Who kept the target off your back. No one was allowed to lay around in the QZ, there was too much work as it was. "Joel you were far from failing her", Ellie said putting her hand on Joel's palm, "It feels different kiddo when you see someone you love drifting away".

All the worried looks that Joel would give you made sense now. All the times he would walk up to you. Taking a hold of your hand as he looked at you. Moving to kiss your hands at the time, if not that then, Joel would just hold them in his much bigger palms. At the time, Ellie thought that by doing that, Joel was just trying to warm them up during the cold evenings, but now it had a way bigger meaning behind it. That was Joel's silent attempt to make sure that you stayed with him. That you wouldn't drift away. Like a true guard at night, standing his watch. Always ready to fight for you.

"And I felt horrible that I left him all alone", the sound of your voice made the two of them turn toward the door. "I kept on telling myself to get up. You need to do that for Joel, but…", you shrugged your shoulders. Joel reached his arm towards you, and you instantly walked close to him. Settling down on his lap. His arm snaked around your middle as Joel pressed a loving kiss to the top of your head. "I never blamed you for it," Joel whispered, looking straight into your eyes. "I know because you're an angel." You cupped his face gently. Leaning in to press your forehead to his. Brushing your fingers under Joel's eyes as you wiped away the last tears.

This man was everything. If you'd fallen for him and his sense of humor back then. The fact that there was never a dull moment with him that even the most serious moments could be turned into fits of laughter. If you had fallen for how attentive and caring he was toward your kids. The way he always put them first. The way he sat in the bathroom for hours learning how to braid Sarah's hair or how he played astronauts with Momo even after the longest shift. Putting him over his shoulder or back as he ran around the living room making all sorts of noises. Then Joel turned into a rock—a whole mountain that shielded you from the restless sea that threatened to drown you. Never moving. Never scared.

"I don't want you to feel like we've been using you as some sort of… as our kids' replacement. The love I feel towards you…" you started, but Ellie quickly shook her head. "How could I? No, Y/N never," she said quickly, and you reached for her hands. "You are a special girl, Ellie, so special," you said as you brushed your fingers over her cheek, and she leaned into your touch. Trying to savor it for as long as possible. "You both are like my parents and I've never felt that..", Ellie's bottom lip trembled. Joel reached out to her as well.

"And you are our girl," Joel said, his voice shaky, but he knew he had to say it. Had to let her know that his coldness toward her at the start was just his defensive response. His fear of the unknown. The fear of it all ending the same. But Joel knew that once his nightmare shifted and he started to see Ellie dying in Sarah's or Momo's place, he knew that she had sneaked past his guard. Ellie had managed to find that well-hidden spark inside Joel's heart. And there was nothing that could have been done about it.

Ellie wrapped her hands over both of your shoulders, pulling you both into a hug. A light cry slipped from her lips. Your hand instantly moved to rub her back in hopes of soothing her. Joel pressed a tender kiss to the crown of her head before turning his eyes to you. Your teary eyes were already looking back at him. You mouthed a silent "I love you" to him, which Joel returned straight away, followed by a light smile.

Once Ellie pulled away, you both looked at her with fondness. "Thank you for sharing this with me. You didn't have to, but you did," she said, as you rubbed away her tears the same way you had done before. "You are a part of the family now. Family doesn't have secrets," you said softly. "Plus, I think me and Y/N both needed closure", you nodded your head at Joel's words. You had told him multiple times that it was eating you alive that you were keeping this way from Ellie. You could tell that she sensed that something was wrong; she just never asked.

"Do you want to see a picture of them?", you asked, turning to Joel, who you knew had kept a picture of you four. The one he always carried around with him. Tommy had taken it on Momo's second birthday. The summer was in full swing, so you decided to have a barbecue outside. You stood there in a flowy dress, laughing at Sarah, who had a surprised look on her face since Joel had rubbed barbecue sauce on her cheek. Joel's head was thrown back as he laughed. Even Momo, who was nestled in your arms, had somewhat of a grin on his face.

"Sarah would have loved you", Ellie lifted her eyes away from the picture to the sound of Joel's voice. You hummed in agreement, "Momo would have been all over you as well you two cheeky bunch would have gotten into so much trouble". Ellie glanced back down. The image that she saw frozen in front of her seemed almost impossible compared to the two people she had met. But now she knew more than better to not judge the book by its cover. The deepest and most painful scars were always hidden the deepest.

"I would have loved to know them", Ellie said dragging her finger over their faces, "Momo, looks like a minute version of Joel". You let out a little laugh, "That's what I said. Imagine how mad I was after carrying him for nine months and he popped out looking nothing like me". Joel cracked a smile, looking down at the photograph himself. The one he barely pulled out these days.

"If we stay in Jackson, we must build them memorial stones and plant flowers all around them," Ellie said firmly. The tears picked up at the corners of your eyes as you gazed at her. "That's a really beautiful idea, Ellie bear," you said, running your fingers over her hair. Joel nudged Ellie's side playfully, making her let out a chuckle before he brought you closer to him once again. Time healed scars, even if slowly. But you two were here and now you had Ellie by your side. Your hearts, even if covered in scars, still beat for one another. Together, you were capable of anything and everything. Life has already proven that.

[songmingisthighs]

Wanbelyn

introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii

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ch. iv - dumped

neurosurgeon!hongjoong × reader

buy me coffee ?

where love and peace is held, i never expected for this to happen. i planned and i planned, i expected, and i hoped, but it was never you. you held what i wanted hostage to make room for you, the thing that i needed but has no means of acceptance. deny me, live your best life.

As much as you hated helping around during the weekends, you have to admit the crowd is interestingly diverse. The lack of rigid schedule and responsibilities allowed people to come or walk by in groups or even alone, even then they seemed busy with their phones. The usually rather calmer cafe became the social hub for certain people with the noise of chatters everywhere and people going back and forth between their seats and the cashier. It was trully interesting.

What's also interesting is the little boy who's hiding under the cashier, drawing a giant circle with a red crayon continuously in his drawing book. You discovered him just as you were about to take over the cashier for Yeonjun who had to go to the back to get some things. The boy only spared you a glance before returning to his drawing book, leaving you to tend to your own thing while he tend to his own. For a moment, you focused on the customer first, though intrigued, you wondered who the kid was and what he was doing there.

Once the customer was tended to, you crouched down to be eye level with him, "And who might you be?" You asked, tilting your head slightly to appear intrigued. The boy spared you one glance before looking back down to his giant red circle. "Don't wanna give me your name, huh? Smart. You should not tell random people your name so maybe I should ask your mom or dad?" At the mention of his parents, you saw his shoulder slumped and he shook his head, "Daddy busy," he mumbled lowly but it was loud enough for you to hear. "Did you came here with your dad?"

Just as he was about to answer, you heard someone call your name which caught your attention. "Who are you talking to?" Wooyoung asked, going around the counter only to see the boy he lost nestling himself in the nook. "Kijoong!" He called and skid over to reach out and grab the boy only to halt abruptly when 'Kijoong' hissed. Yes, he HISSED at Wooyoung, surprising you as evident from your eyes that widened to the size of saucers. "You can't just run and hide like that, I was worried! I was looking for you!" He sighed. "Wait, you know this kid?" You asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as Wooyoung shrugged, "Yeah, his dad is a doctor and I'm helping look over him because he was called in. You know, on call," he explained. Teasingly you nudged your friend and wiggled your eyebrows, "Didn't take you for a nanny, Woo," and much to your surprise, it was Kijoong who answered you, throwing his crayon past you and Wooyoung, frowning deeply, "Not nanny, Kijoong big boy, don't need nanny," he huffed displeasedly.

Wooyoung opened his mouth to scold Kijoong but you cut him off with a scoff, "No you're not a big boy, a big boy wouldn't have ran off without telling the adult he was with, OBVIOUSLY you need a nanny, Kijoong is it?" Both Kijoong and Wooyoung were surprised that you stepped in but as quickly as the surprise came, Kijoong scowled and move to push you down but you dodged his push, rendering him angry. Once again, he tried to push you down again, with both hands this time and Wooyoung tried to step in but you blocked him once again. "No, use your words," you told him in a gentle voice but odd eniygh that was when he began sniffling and soon, tears rolled down his face. While Wooyoung panicked as Kijoong's face grew red and his tiny shoulders shook in sadness, you remained calm and even repositioned yourself to sitting criss-crossed in front of him, "Use your words," you repeated in the same cadence which this time resulted in Kijoong looking up at you from his wet lashes and scooted slightly out. "Didn't know I had to tell," he mumbled through sniffles which thankfully you could hear through the background noise. You nodded in understanding, "Does your daddy usually let you walk around without telling him?" Kijoong shook his head whilst sniffling, prompting you to tell Wooyoung to grab you a couple of tissues, "Daddy holds my hand a-an-d we'll t-talk." "Did you ran off because you're not with daddy?" You asked again, scooting back and gesturing for him to crawl out by opening your arms. At first, Kijoong seem like he hestitated to step out. But after a brief moment and one last sniffle, he crawled out of the small space and stood in front of you sadly. Truly, if he was a cartoon, he'd have droopy, sad puppy ears on his head.

You got up from your position and began fixing his vest and shorts up slightly before wiping his snotty nose with utmost care, "Well, whatever your reason was for running, I think we can understand that, can't we, Woo?" You glaced at Wooyoung who had stood up and leaned his hip on the counter, nodding to your question, "Of course we can." You looked back at Kijoong who now had an ashamed look on his face and smiled, "You were with Wooyoung so he has to make sure you were okay because if you weren't, your daddy will be very sad so Wooyoung has to be able to see you clearly at all times, do you understand?" Kijoong nodded firmly and you noticed his sniffles had started to stop and he even took a step closer to Wooyoung, "I wanted to play so... Hide and seek," he explained. Amused, Wooyoung chuckled and pat the boy on the head gently, "I'd appreciate you telling me when you want to run off so please don't do that again, okay? We can play again later but right now you need to fuel up," he said before he grabbed the boy who squaled happily and bringing him around the counter, mouthing a thank you at you for helping handle the situation.

For a moment you thought you'd just go back to work; handle customers and helping Yeonjun prepare orders. But around 10 minutes later, Wooyoung came trudging back, flailing himself over the pick up counter and groaning.

"(y/n), I told you to bring the trash out back," Yeonjun snickered as he passed by to go to the brewing machine, prompting Wooyoung to shoot him a glare, "Shut up, Yeonjun, I'm facing an issue," he hissed. You stopped in your tracks hearing what Wooyoung said, immediately connecting his issue to the little boy you found under the cashier, "Is Kijoong okay?" You asked but Wooyoung turned to you with a deadpanned look, "Shouldn't you be asking if I was okay?"

Leaning down, you rest your chin on the counter across from Wooyoung with a grin, "Nope." If the pop of the P didn't annoy Wooyoung, it was the peck on his forehead that got him screeching through gritted teeth as he tried to swat you away. "I'm serious, I'm practically in a serious negotiating state with a 4 year old over lunch, it's embarrassing!" He whined.

The words Wooyoung used made you peer over to the table Wooyoung chose for him and Kijoong. You saw the boy back on his drawing book but he was peeking over some people who were sitting around him, looking like he was ready to bolt.

"Mind if I try something?" You asked Wooyoung but you didn't even bother to wait for his actual reply before you rounded the counter and walked over to Kijoong who, upon your arrival, set his crayon gently on the side and placed his hands on the table. "I have a problem and Wooyoung said you might be the right person to help me. Do you think you're up for it?"

That's how you found yourself in the secluded area of the kitchen, two staff members working on orders while you finished up putting bowls of ingredients next to Kijoong who you set on the metal counter. "Okay," you clapped your hands once as you began, "So we have macaroni, shredded cheese, some cream sauce, some marinara sauce, ground beef, some chicken, butter, ketchup, and a little bit of oregano if we're feeling fancy. What do you think would go well?" Kijoong stared at the bowls in front of him with a serious look on his face all the while Wooyoung loomed over your shoulder and frantically tugged your arm, "This is a bad idea I tell you, if he feels mischievous, he'll DEFINITELY start by dumping that marinara on you!" He hissed but you simply waved him off, waiting for Kijoong to give you an order with an empty bowl in your hand.

Kijoong took longer than you expected and you decided that maybe he needed a bit of encouragement. "Well, I'd usually go like this," you narrated the ingredients you picked as you put them in the bowl before you mix them up, "And this is what I would usually eat." Kijoong stared at the bowl with big round eyes and then his gaze shifted to you, as if asking if you really can eat that. To prove your point, you grabbed a spoon and started taking a bite and then two and then three.

Seeing you eat seem to intrigued Kijoong and before you knew it, he tapped your arm and pointed at the things he wanted on his bowl. Sure, it was only some macaroni, tiny bit of beef and chicken and a load of cheese and butter, but he was happy with the bowl and ate it with gusto. He even experimented with the ketchup and the marinara.

Wooyoung stood at the side, amazed at how you got the boy to eat almost effortlessly. Moreover, he almost screames when he saw Kijoong urging you to continue eating as well and even asked about what your bowl tasted like. He refused to try but seeing as how he ate, you were just glad you helped.

"Hey, do you think I can bring him by whenever he's chucked to me so you could take care of him?" Wooyoung asked, hand reaching for your spoon for a bite of your food which you relented but scoffed, "He's entrusted to YOU Woo," "Yeah, but think about what I can charge his dad knowing that not only you tamed this little hurricane, you actually got him to eat!" You stared at him slightly funny, amused and confused, "You talk as if he's such a disaster." Wooyoung knew you didn't know and he knew he could say what he said because he had extensive experience, but he rolled his eyes and nudged his hip with yours, "When you get that job at kq hospital, you'll know what I mean. You've got your interview date, right?" "Yup, got my resume ready too!" You grinned, heart fluttering slightly at the thought of returning to your normalcy. Seeimg you grinning made Wooyoung grin as well, glad that you were finally able to take a step forward after what happened in the past.

Your little moment of relief was cut short however when you saw Kijoong grabbing a squeeze bottle filled with chili sauce up to his face. As cute as he is, you really do hope you didn't have to take care of him anymore.

network :

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[gallifreyanhotfive]

Random Doctor Who Facts You Might Not Know, Part 30

The Second Doctor and Jamie once landed on the nucleus of a uranium atom. An entire civilization lived there and told them stories of their sister planets being destroyed by humans splitting atoms for nuclear power.

Irving Braxiatel once claimed he had a phobia of foreign objects being put in his mouth.

Moments after leaving the Fourth Doctor, Sarah Jane encountered the Monk.

The Monk is also aware of the existence of Jenny, the Doctor’s daughter.

The Eighth Doctor once befriended and traveled with an Ice Warrior named Ssard as a companion. Upon leaving the TARDIS, Ssard married Stacy, one of the Doctor’s other companions.

Removing a Time Lord’s second heart eliminates their respiratory bypass.

It is incredibly difficult to give Braxiatel presents because his future self will often ship him whatever he wants the second he decides he wants it.

The Eighth Doctor gave Braxiatel socks for Christmas.

Similar to the Greek letter nicknames Omega and Theta Sigma, there was a Time Lord called Epsilon Delta. Epsilon Delta grew to hate the Time Lords and ran away from Gallifrey, eventually adopting the title the President as he had made himself President of St. Matthew's College on Earth.

There are beings that live in the time vortex. If you traverse the vortex unprotected, they might eat you.

The Eighth Doctor once referred to Braxiatel as a "colleague and occasional collaborator in adventures of the mind, the body and the soul." This is a really complex and convoluted way of describing your older brother.

While attempting to seduce the Seventh Doctor, Queen Angvia shoved his face in her breasts. She thought there was "boiling masculine virility under the flimsy of [his] beauty." By shoving his face in her chest, she gave him a dose of her pheromones. He and Mel only realized something was Very Wrong when he almost broke the notorious no-kissing rule.

While fetching a cake for K-9's birthday, Romana II single-handedly foiled an alliance between the Master, the Daleks, and the Cybermen, but when she returned with the cake, it came to life and asked not to be eaten.

After arriving in 1666, the Fourth Doctor and Sarah Jane were almost run over by a heavily loaded cart being driven by someone in odd clothing. The Doctor didn't know this at the time, but this was the Terileptil leader that his Fifth incarnation was chasing.

Braxiatel's office in the Braxiatel Collection is part of his TARDIS.

Miss Hannigan introduced herself to Irving Braxiatel as a missionary. He responded by saying that missionary was an interesting position.

First 1 Prev 29 Next 31

[janus-cadet]

Thoroughly enjoyed the two last Doctor Who episode, especially the Devil's chord. II already knew I was going to adore Maestro, but nothing could have prepare me for how much they served.

So, yes, here they are, joining their father on the Tarot Project, as the Nine of Pentacles!

I'm actually really happy with how it turned out! Now, under the cut, you'll find a quick explanation for the choice of card, and all of the other Doctor Who cards I've done so far!

Now, Maestro do not fit the card as such- not only is it starting to get a bit hard to find corresponding cards (I mean, I've done 50 already-), but they are also a complex character who is not grounded in a reality easily translated in the official cards. But Maestro is also the embodiment of music, and the Nine of Pentacles is the one that fit the most, to me, the vibe they are giving. You see, the Nine of Pentacles is a card centered around abundance. It's in fact the bringer of said abundance, as well as the enjoyer: you brought it to your life, and now, you get to enjoy the fruit of your labour. It reminded me of the way Maestro brought this over excitement, over abundance of music, in their first appearance- to steal it for themself, true! But then, to enjoy it, to lounge in it. Refering to them as they lounge on the piano, listening to the sound of a nuclear winter, like a cat that got the milk. There is abundance, luxury in the concept of Music, something that can express anything and everything; and they definitely aim to delight in it.

Other than that, it's also a card meant for someone taking their independence, going solo; perhaps someone cutting tie with a problematic family member, or learning to live on their own, supporting themself. The Nine of Pentacles is also a card for someone who is, as it is, in harmony with the world around them- quite literally, in Maestro's case. You take on what's around you, and can harness the energy of nature to bring pleasure in your life. Let's just hope that you'll refrain from doing so by completely stealing music from everyone else.

I really, really hope we'll get more of Maestro in the time to come, tho. I would pay so much money to get to learn more about their backstroy, their relatonship with the Toymaker, as bad as it obviously was. I don't know, I'm definitely fascinated by this new Pantheon, for damn sure!

Now, to conclude, a plethora of Doctor Who card, in chronological order. The first one is three years old, if you can believe that!

[anotherandomcollection]

Perhaps in another life...

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≻─ ⋆✩ pairings: mavuika x fem!reader (can be read as gn!reader) ≻─ ⋆✩ warnings: some kind of fluff?, angst! - not beta read. probably ooc mavuika so... sorry in advance ≻─ ⋆✩ spoilers?: 5.0 Archon Quest (Act I & II) ≻─ ⋆✩ author's note: idk I feel like writing some angst so I may as well try with a new little idea I had... I also wrote this at like 2am with a sudden rush of inspiration...

I haven't written in a while and I'm completely new to this, I have never written on tumblr so forgive my formatting please. I don't know how to feel about this

≻─ ⋆✩ word count: 1.6K

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The traveler says nothing as they observe the Pyro archons family portrait, one that had been painted to her family's likeness. Apart from her parents and her sister, there had been someone else, clearly bearing no resemblance to any of the family, this someone had their arms linked around the archon - everyone smiling. The traveler notes how the archon can't seem to tear her gaze away from the portrait, before she snaps back to the situation at hand. Her eyes drift back to the image during their conversation and they wonder just how long the archon's duties had kept this archon away from her family. The answer was too long - longer than what the traveler had ever imagined.

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The day your love officially decides to sacrifice herself, was one you already knew was coming. There had been discussions for long before it had been finalised and you were just hoping that your darling wife could let a different archon do this... It's not like Natlan lacked in archons, with the possibility for any human to ascend to the seat. Sure, it was selfish, that much you knew but did she really have to be the one? It hurt to know that Mavuika had to be - to give up her life and return five centuries in the future. Five centuries and without you. And you would live the rest of your life without her.

There had been arguments and heated discussions that ended up resulting in everyone's anger and it helped no one, really. At some point, you had to accept it, before you sent off your love with anger instead of some final memories of love and joy. Her mind was clearly made up, long before the final announcement.

It was hard, of course. Hard to accept because suddenly your wife was a ticking time bomb. A set date and a set time, where she would cease to be with you and then she would be lost. She would die and sure, she would be resurrected later... But not in your life time. She would be gone and you would never see your wife alive again. It had felt almost like a doctor's diagnosis, when they give you a time limit. But at least people still had the hope of fighting off an illness and pushing through. This date was final and it was becoming so very real and closing in so very fast.

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The last of her days were spent easy and quiet. Away from the archon life and responsibilities - Mavuika had already ensured she completed everything before the announcement. She had her last days to be spent, after all.

You'd gone out together with her sister, Hine, travelling around Natlan one last time... There had been time spent curled up together, relishing in each other's warmth once more and the comfort found in each other's arms. Soon, sleep would not come easy for you. Too used to the warmth of your lover.

You'd brought her for a quick visit to Sumeru, though it had been rather uneventful and... A lot of sand. More than you'd ever encountered in Natlan and finer than you'd encountered. Dunes and dunes of sand in every direction and wind that blew the sand everywhere and it had stubbornly clung to everything. You spend time still getting sand out of your clothes and bags long after your darling has passed.

In the nights, quiet words of comfort are exchanged and promises made. Mavuika had already requested her wedding ring be kept somewhere... Somewhere she could find when she inevitably rose once more in the future. You cling to your wife, even in your sleep and you dream of a future that you will never be able to have with her.

At times, it feels like you are grieving the loss before it happens. But how do you not when you know it would happen already?

No matter how much fun and laughter is spent together in each day. No matter the soft kisses and tender touches... Your wife would die in a matter of days. And you were powerless to stop it.

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"Come on love, its time to get up", She whispers, though she doesn't shake you awake. The sun had long rose and the colours of the sky had shifted from the orange and purple sunrise hues into the bright sky of a new day. You looked ethereal - the sunlight catching in your hair and sprawled across the pillows. And so at peace, without the weight of a hidden grief that you carried over the last few weeks.

She supposes it was how you saw her when she set her hair aflame. 'it's beautiful, angelic even...', you'd told her once. If she brought up the comparison you would probably laugh. Something about how the sunlight in your hair could not compare to an archon's beauty. Her beauty. But still she watches as the sun dances across your skin with a wonderful glow.

"We don't have anything on today.", Is the only response she gets, your voice laced with sleep, before you bury your face into her neck, turning away from the sun's glare. You can feel her laughter as she runs her fingers through your hair and you are lulled back to sleep with the rhythmic and soothing quality of it. When you wake later, you find yourself still tangled with your wife and she too had been dragged back to the land of dreams.

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The day comes and... The moment your wife gives you the last kiss, last hug and last touch... It passed numbly. She hugs her family goodbye, final words are exchanged... and then she's gone. You had not been allowed to witness the actual sacrifice and you did not want to either ways. The feeling remains numb until it's night time and you're alone. Alone for the first time in... Years. Since you had married, she had always been home for bed, curling up together and relishing in the warmth that radiated through the house. Warmth of the person, in both the figurative and literal sense... And it was gone.

The dam breaks and you cry yourself to sleep. You wake exhausted, despite the full night of rest and it is painful. You force yourself to go about your day and life continues on.

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It hurts even more, when Hine, still young and perhaps she had not quite grasped the meaning of gone. She's inconsolable at first, but soon gains a kind of fire in her, insistent that there's some way of seeing her sister again in the future. Her determination would have been adorable, if you weren't already aware that living that long was impossible and just barely coping with your grief. And unlike your wife (ex...wife? No, she was your wife even if she had passed.) no one else really had that 'wayob ordained purpose' to rise again and protect Natlan from destruction so far into the future.

Five centuries was almost unfathomable to you. No one, short of gods and perhaps the Adepti you hear about in stories from Liyue could live that long. But you were no such mythical beast nor were you a god. You were as human as they got and so was Hine.

Regardless, you force a kind smile as you work together to theorise ways to live that long. To see her sister again and to see your wife again. It's not possible, you already know, and you hoped that her sister would see it before she was too far gone in her aspirations for the far future. She does, eventually, almost a full year later when the passion mellow and it finally hits that she's gone. You hold each other as you both cry and mourn the loss of a loved one.

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Five centuries later and Mavuika rises once more. She finds the wedding ring that she painstakingly stored and had a family portrait made. Painted onto her father's old armour, she describes her family to the best of her ability and she almost weeps at the likeness that the artist manages to capture.

She cannot mourn now, not really. She already accepted her fate in the centuries before and she knew what she was giving up. But if not her, then who? She had a duty to her nation. The grief hits her in the quiet hours of the night when she isn't the Pyro archon of Natlan but just Mavuika . No one fights alone - but why did she feel like this was a battle she was oh no lonely in. So far into the future and so much has changed since the past.

Unfortunately, little survives five centuries of erosion. She doesn't know exactly of what happens to her family. Her sister... Has some records and she pieces together that her younger sister managed to be an architect. Playing a major role in rebuilding the Scions of the Canopy.

But you... Some evidence points to you also became an architect alongside her sister. Helping to rebuild and design the children of the Echoes. Some say you died young, a mysterious disease that compromised your immune systems. Others say you eventually left Natlan to a different nation, which one is unclear but you never returned until much later in life. But all records are alike in stating that you never remarried and never took on another love.

And so Mavuika sits alone and she prays (to who? to who does an archon pray to?) that in the end, her sacrifice is worth it. That giving up everything had been worth it. And she hopes, so desperately that when her (second) human life expires, she can see you again.

[everything-is-as-it-was]

My TIT Berlin experience!

Here's all the things that happened during the show that stood out to me as probably things that don't always happen/ were specific to our show:

They came out wearing shorts because it was a super hot day in Berlin, Dan said they had performed in the same venue for ii as well and distinctly remembers rivulets of sweat cascading down his arms

They made the dolls 69 :(

During the Phil Doctor bit, people shouted "scheiße" for the first one, and the typer write it as "scheisse." Dan asked "do we not have the B thing?!" and the person then proceeded to write "scheisseBBBB" on the screen. We had the same answer for the NEXT two questions and they were written: "scheiBBBBe" and then simply "BBBBB"

Phil seemed to forget a line and laughed after Dan looked at him pointedly at the beginning of the game show bit

Dan had to repeat the fact that they put Vegas pages in Tabinof twice in order for them to actually put it on the screen

Someone shouted cat whiskers when Dan asked what their legacy would be

The wrestling went as expected (notable instances include but are not limited to: Phil shoving the pompoms of a hat while standing over Dan. Dan trying to hit Phil with a metal chair. Phil slamming Dan's head into said metal chair. Dan biting Phil. Dan holding Phil hostage, prompting Phil to ram his ass into his crotch. Three times.)

Dan was very very sweaty after the wrestling (lol)

After Dan's little monologue once the wrestling was over, Phil came out and there was a super awkward pause where I think someone forgot their lines (I remember there being a pause and Phi saying "......what are you talking to them about?"

The confessions bit:

Someone pegged a cop that was their ex's friend

Two ppl got engaged

Person's friend cancelled on them so they sold their ticket to buy merch (this was also stated on a card in the phlit during the pre show)

During the dance bit Phil was very obviously looking at Dan. Dan was very into it but Phil is so me in that he looked quite honestly lost lmao

After the show we stood by the stage door and Dan and Phil came out in a big black van with tinted windows. It was very difficult to see inside lol. Then about 15 minutes later one of the members of their staff (british ginger guy with a beard) came out and said "they" (dnp ig) texted him and wanted to make sure people weren't waiting at the door anymore since they were gone, so he just wanted to let us know they'd already left in case we didn't know.

[supernova049]

It's that time of the year again, time for another insane Susan theory

Ok, so everybody's been talking about Susan getting mentioned. Some have even pointed out the extreme amount of time they spent on her, and to clarify that her current state is unknown, almost like they are setting up her return.

Susan's mention gets more interesting when you take into account The 15th Doctor's fixation with being a completely unique being as pointed out in 'Space Babies'. Almost like if it's an idea setting up to be challenged later down the line.

Susan's mention gets EVEN more interesting when you take into account how the season has already explored a lot the theme of a young person suffering because of their absent parents. From The Doctor, to Ruby, to the space babies, etc. And Susan has missing parents, both in the sense that we have no idea who her parents are and because of The First Doctor (who acts as a surrogate father) infamously dropping her and promising he will return, something we all know he didn't really accomplish.

There's also this one recent interview with RTD where he talks about how The 15th Doctor will open up more about his lost family with Ruby and connect over that but maybe it doesn't mean anything idk.

He also talked about how in the series finale there will be a surprise actor making an appearance during a huge scene, and Russel goes to specify it isn't a celebrity cameo but someone they haven't credited or confirmed yet.

You can also bring up the fact that the big baddy being set up right now is The One Who Waits, and who is someone who waits who has been setting up to return? THAT'S SUSAN FUCKING FOREMAN

Now, I'm not saying that Susan is the one who waits because simply waiting isn't enough evidence, but there's clearly a connection going on around here.

So my theory is that Susan is coming back with a direct connection to The One Who Waits and it's probably really mad at The Doctor for leaving her (probably acting as a dark reflection of Ruby of what would happen if she overly fixates on those who left her), and she is being played by Carole Ann Ford.

But because that's not spicy enough, on top of everything I've said I'm going to drop a wild prediction and mention how for some reason we have no idea what's the name of the companion that Varada Sethu is going to play and that The Mirror has stated she will appear briefly during series 14.

The huge scene Russel is talking about is Carole Ann Ford regenerating into Varada Sethu, the latter one will go to play Susan Foreman II. I rest my case.

[glendylucast]

I had the most vivid dream My feet had left the ground I was floating to heaven, but I could only look down My mind was heavy Running ragged with worst case scenarios Emergency exits and the distance below I woke up so worried that the angels let go Oh God, I'm so tired of being afraid Sleeping At Last - Six

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High Fever

After World War II, Zussman took a white-collar job at a financial company at Chicago. It was an incredibly stressful job and he felt completely out of his element, but the pay was splendid and he needed to save up for his big plan, so he pushed through.

One day, he came home with a high fever and starving—too sick to even make himself an food, too petty to go to the hospital and too stubborn to ask for help. He thought at least he could make himself an oatmeal before sleep.

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That afternoon, Clifford knocked Zussman's door and smell something burnt inside his room. Having no respond, he forced the door open. Smoke clung to the air as soon as he stepped inside. He looked for the kitchen to found Zussman collapsed on the floor and a pot of oatmeal had long since burned into a charred lump.

After cleaning the mess, Clifford carried Zussman to his bed. That man was burning with fever and drenched in sweat. Zussman's damp clothes clung to him, reeking of sweat and smoke. Clifford muttered curses under his breath.

Clifford walked away to call a doctor, but Zussman stopped him and forced him to stay.

Had no choice, carefully, he stripped the soaked clothes off Zussman then wiping him down with a damp cloth to cool him off.

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Thankfully, someone was there before something worse happened, even though Clifford was really mad at Zussman for being stubborn and didn't tell him anything.

Since that day, they started calling each other by their first names.

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Another WildZuss mini comic!

The song was "Six" because Zussman's Enneagram is 7w6, and I save "Seven" for another occasion

Also, referenced and inspired by that Zoro/Sanji and Ghost/Soap comic by Umiko, if you know, you know.

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Since you're here!

Now you can go!