#also maybe it’s just cause I’m aro but I do think getting to keep a pet is more important than a 12 year old’s crush

[under-a-shady-ash-tree]

(shaking you desperately by the shoulders) Mabel isn’t guilt-tripping Dipper in the time travel episode she’s SAD that she lost her PET and Dipper chooses the timeline where she gets to keep Waddles over the one where he wins the prize for Wendy because he’s a GOOD BROTHER who doesn’t want his sister to be sad

[slytherinshua]

2AM CRISIS

genre. comfort. sickfic. warnings. reader is sick specifically throwing up so don't read if you find that rly gross... some comments abt it being reader's first time sleeping over and the hyungs being extremely cautious lmfao. not proofread. pairing. yujin x fem!reader. wc. 1k. request. requested by @theriizeler a/n. i hope this makes u feel better dodo :(( first time writing yujin i hope i did okay he's rly such a sweetheart :( ppl need to write more for him cause i get not writing for him cause of his age but he's always skipped over...

“Ew…” Yujin mumbled, crouched on the floor of the bathroom with you as you heaved again. For this being your first time sleeping over (with extremely watchful eyes from Hao and Hanbin), it definitely was not going as planned. You had felt something was wrong the entire day, but your boyfriend Yujin was so excited to spend the night with you that you didn’t have the heart to cancel on him.

You should have trusted your gut, though, because now you were throwing up in the toilet in painful gags, your throat burning and a disgusting acidic aftertaste left in your mouth. Was it something you had eaten? Or maybe you had caught a stomach bug at school… You envied your boyfriend for evading it, though you guess it made sense. He rarely attended because of his schedule.

“Stay right there.” Yujin whispered, getting up and leaving the bathroom to find some water for you. 

He didn’t have much experience taking care of someone since he was usually the one always being pampered and babied. He tried his best to recall what his mom and Hao had done when he had gotten sick, but the memory was foggy as he had mostly just slept until he felt better. They did force him to take some horrible-tasting medicine, though… God, did he have to persuade you to do that as well? He’d rather just die than possibly give you an excuse to despise him.

Once he was back with a bottle of water, he handed it to you and sat back down on the floor of the bathroom. It was almost 2 am by now, and he wasn’t exactly sure what to do. He could see tears prickling at your lashes, and his absolute worst fear in the world was seeing you cry. He had no idea how he’d make the tears stop once they started.

You swished your mouth with the water and spat again into the toilet before taking a proper drink. The cool water soothed your burning throat, but it didn’t ease all the discomfort. You still felt like shit, and your stomach still hurt. Your head was also pounding, but it wasn’t as bad as the nausea. 

You turned back to Yujin who’s eyes were blown big and confused, though you could tell he was worried about you. His under eyes looked tired and you suddenly felt really bad for waking him up to go puke in his bathroom. If you had been able to get up without disturbing him, then you would have. But he had fallen asleep clinging to you like a koala, and there was no way to escape his grasp without waking him up.

“I’m sorry… you should just go back to sleep.” You muttered, but Yujin was quick to shake his head.

“I can’t just leave you throwing up by yourself… I’ll stay until you’re ready to go back to bed.” He told you, stroking your hair gently. You tried to breathe steadily in hopes of stopping the urge to throw up again, but it didn’t work. You quickly pushed Yujin’s hand away from your face and discarded more of yesterday’s meal into the bowl. Both you and Yujin grimaced in sync, and he hesitantly pulled back your hair and stroked your back.

The tears that you had tried to keep at bay finally started to stream down your face. You hated everything about the situation. You felt awful, not just physically, but for ruining your first sleepover with Yujin like this. No one wanted to be sitting next to their girlfriend who couldn’t stop vomiting at 2 am. 

“Don’t cry— please, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Yujin panicked. The only thing he could think of doing was offering you more water, which you took amidst broken sobs. He wrapped his arms around you hesitantly, knowing that he always calmed down in your arms. Maybe it would help you, as well. Your sobs slowed a bit, in turn slowing down Yujin’s anxiously beating heart. 

“Hey, what if I just get you a bowl? You can keep it by the bed and then you won’t have to stay here on the floor, hm? We can cuddle too… if you want?” You would’ve smiled at how cute Yujin’s suggestion was if you weren’t too focused on calming yourself down. You knew he was trying his best, and while he was a bit slow on ways to help (you were pretty sure there were some pills to help with nausea that Hanbin had bought last time Gyuvin had felt nauseous during a shoot, but you were certain that your boyfriend had no idea where they were stored), his presence alone was enough to make things a little better.

“Yeah… let’s just do that.” You agreed, standing up slowly. You flushed the toilet and rinsed your mouth once more with water. While Yujin was getting a metal bowl for you, you brushed your teeth, relieved that your mouth no longer had the awful aftertaste of stomach acid.

Once you were back under the blankets on the mattresses that the older members had set up on the floor of the living room (which was almost too overkill as neither you nor Yujin would even think to attempt anything like that, protesting Hao’s carefully thought of set-up would’ve seemed even more suspicious), you felt your stomach ease a bit. 

You curled up against Yujin’s chest, wanting nothing more than to be as close as possible to him. The soap and shampoo scents from his earlier shower lingered on his skin, and you were surprised at how effective it was in stopping your nausea and relaxing you. Your head was still pounding, but you’d take the pain over feeling sick. Maybe you would even be able to get some sleep again like this.

Your boyfriend kissed your forehead and started talking softly, trying to get you to fall asleep to the lull of his voice. It was extremely effective and you found yourself dozing off within minutes. You smiled when the last thing you heard Yujin say was a whispered “feel better soon, princess.”

↳ zerobaseone taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @okshu,, @chewryy,, @haecien,, @sobun1est,,

@emmylksblog,, @talkingsaxy,, @thesunsfullmoon,, @chenleszone

[onesidedradiostatic]

As an aro, I keep thinking “cmon, asexuality is not that hard to figure out, I understood it before I realized I was aro,” but then I remembered that one time in high school when I was taking a psych class and our teacher showed us a video on asexuality that included both aroaces and alloro aces talking about their experiences (unfortunately no aro allos otherwise I would’ve figured myself out way faster lmao) and the entire rest of the class would legit start screaming like what they heard was too unhinged to comprehend every time someone said something as simple as “yeah we’re dating but we don’t have sex cause we don’t feel that way about each other” (something I too didn’t get cause (pre-realization aroallo voice) isn’t the point of dating so that it’s socially acceptable to have sex, but even then this is an overreaction). I felt awful for the ace person in the class, like. I’m so sorry they had to be surrounded by that. And this took place in the early 2010s.

Uhhh to swing the mood back a bit, since Alastor is also old and doesn’t know what asexuality is, the idea of Vox just wanting to know what his preferences are even because what does anyone else have that he doesn’t, and all Alastor can think is “hey actually good question, what do I like in a woman” and only being able to think of traits he likes in friends. Even better if he realizes what he’s done and he’s like “there must be something I haven’t seen in anyone, or I would be having amorous feelings for Rosie and I know my feelings for her are platonic!” You can almost see the question marks surrounding both their heads. Rosie and Velvette seeing this and they’re both internally just like “please figure it out already”

they are both old men they both don't know what asexuality or aromanticism is and it is horrible. but I cannot imagine them having a conversation like this at the current point they're at. FUCK IT let me one-sided radiostatic this shit. it would be funny I think if back in the pre-rejection days vox tried to ask alastor for his type in subtle ways of trying to make a move. alastor struggles to come up with anything. maybe answers something super generic (me projecting from when I've been asked my type in the past). vox getting excited because the generic ass answer could fit him (it could fit literally anyone). neither of them think anything of alastor struggling to answer. it's terrible.

[buffporcupine]

death note headcanons

because i know my death note mutuals aren’t getting what they wanted from me

light

-can crack his elbows the way one would crack their knuckles

-probably had to do a musical elective in his first year of middle school and chose guitar cause he thought it would be easy but it wasn’t.

-the type of song he really enjoys is very specific. going to hell yet i tried so so hard to please god song. i missed my only chance song. why wasn’t i like the other kids song. thrones playlist. i could elaborate but i won’t

-as for sexuality, i see him as not wanting to put a label on whatever he is in theory but in practice being some type of bispec (probably berriromantic) for romantic attraction and then somewhere on the asexual spectrum for sexual attraction.

-as for gender i see him as agender whose not really in labeling himself as anything when it comes to sexuality and gender.

-agender but probably 100% fine with being super male presenting. he just wants to keep out of gender as a convo and that’s great. good for him

-no!!!!! i refuse to say this mf is aromantic (because it’s not accurate and it’d be an insult to aromantic people to say he’s aro)!!!!!

-just because he manipulated misa and kiyomi into doing his bidding and didn’t love them doesn’t immediately make him aro. i’m sure he could have found someone if he wanted to, and he could have loved them if he was with them to love them, but he wasn’t with them to love them he was with them to use them.

misa

-half belgian half japanese. her parents met in belgium while her father was on vacation.

-also im torn bcos i wanna write an au where misa is mexican and that’s it everything else is the same as canon but i’m pretty sure that’s just me wanting her to be even more Like Me (tm)

-speaks a little bit of english, way more french, and obvi japanese. finds linguistics interesting but doesn’t have enough time to research it that thoroughly

-likes being short and “small” small girl aesthetic i guess but sometimes wishes she had longer legs so she could wear skirts w/o looking silly and short

-panromantic does not see gender at all when becoming attracted to someone. i see her as def on the ace spectrum, maybe something like demisexual or aegosexual. could be me projecting dunno.

-she’s probably dated both girls and boys before

-would NOT break up with someone in a rude way or just dump them. she’d put a lot of effort into an apology and explanation into why.

-if she met miu iruma they’d be best friends. sorry i bring danganronpa into everything guys

-can we please just appeciate mexican misa for a second. she’s cooking sopa de fideo for the task and being the bilingual hot girl we all needed

-mexican misa

-as for her music taste she probably listens to upbeat english language music and sappy love songs. “there is a light that never goes out” and “melt with you” sound like go-tos for her sorry. i could also see her being a bimbo pop ayesha + britney manson girlie though

-tbh whatever your race/ethnicity is you could project it onto misa and it’d work. i love it. anyway d d d d d d d did i say m m m mexican misa

-i think she’d love love love getting her hair done!!! sensitive scalp mf but she’d still love getting her hair done

-mexican misa visiting mexico and getting braids and cute clothes and her fave candy

-was not a theatre kid. sorry guys but her middle and high school didn’t offer theatre 😔😔

lawliet

-chronically dehydrated just because he forgets to drink water. he tries to drink water and always gets afraid of developing kidney / liver problems but he just keeps forgetting. what the fuck L

-soup stan i think he’d love some good soup. soup stan x soup cooker (lawmane)

-i think you could have a really deep convo about anything with L. if you’re passionate about anything he’ll just listen and he’ll talk to you about what he’s passionate about to. he loves to think and would def entertain you with a convo about whether a hot dog is a sandwich or something dumb like that you know.

-he’s a thinker he just loves discussions

-has a british accent when speaking english bcos watari and lived in england you know. he thinks british accents in english sound good tho and LOVES making fun of how silly new york accents are (me too bro. me too)

-if he went to middle school or the japanese/british equivalent of it, he’d def be the type to choose some weird ass elective fucking creative writing instead of the “normal” guitar, choir, band, orchestra and shit

[chainoftalent]

Tbh Ive been rereading all your posts and I’ve just been seeing how much your writing style has improved over the last year. I especially love your version of pre-game shuichi and how well characterized he is. However if I had to say one thing that’s been scratching my mind has been how Kokichi views his beloveds. Specifically I’m referring to how it seems he cares equally for each member but then sometimes the specific darling (the reader I think) is referred to as his “partner in crime”. Now I know this goes against kind of his whole leader gimmick, but I’m wondering if there ever is a reality where one specific member is his romantically involved partner while the others are platonic. Like he still loves them don’t get me wrong but also part of me would like to know what a Kokichi experiencing romantic interest/infatuation for the first time would be like. How would he balance it out with being a leader and process how different his feeling are from his other family members, how would he show he likes them? There’s so much potential to me Idk just a thought but I’d like to hear your thoughts.

love ur work<3

Very good question, the short answer is that the idea of a monogamous or romantically inclined kokichi is just unfathomable to me /j

More Romantic Orientated Yan Kokichi

Oh god this got long

The long answer is it's definitely possible, I personally see Kokichi as very aro/ace and that tends to color things but the aro is definitely more of my own stuff going on. I think he would straight up not recognize it's romantic, he sees them, his heart pounds, his hands get a bit sweaty and he's just like "hm, i seem to be poisoned"

He's going to rant about how weird his new future DICE member is to dice though, about how they make him feel even weirder then normal and make him feel heated and he wants to touch them but like, not tackle hugging or climbing on them like a jungle gym but like, soft, so he's probably been poisoned or dying or something.

Then once the other DICE members have proceeded to immediately launch into mocking Kokichi about his cruuuuush does he realize ah, this is that romance thingie people keep talking about... he hates it.

Honestly might be more avoidant of them then usual, this is new, and not a fun new, it's throwing things off and making it harder to plan and he doesn't like it. He spends more time observing at first then normal, maybe even tries to spend extra time away to try and ditch the crush part and go back to more familiar territory, plus what if it only lasts as long as the crush lasts??? Then what??? He needs more data.

I do think he would keep the obsession even if the crush faded though they'd probably bump down a few spots in the dice subconscious tier list of obsession for the record. Going from like, a full ten of his obsession down to like, a seven.

Once Kokichi has come to terms that he is in fact, having a crush, the obsession is only getting stronger, and that this might actually be something okay and useful. He's all in on recruitment, but he's trying to frame himself more as a knight in shining armor kind of thing, but like, ironically. He will push a pie in their face and laugh one moment and then the next moment dramatically save them from being bumped by some kids balloon, complete with fake dying and how worthy it is to martyr for the cause bleeeeh.

He's not actually trying to actually be a knight in shining armor, he's making a gag about the whole concept while still trying to link the two in his love interests mind. He's not your Lancelot, he's your Don Quixote, he WILL duel a windmill for your honor. He's trying to play into romantic archetypes like that but twisting them around into something original and humorous. His own spin on things while he tries and finds out his own niche and philosophy. Gives a lot more gifts and tries to show off more a someone who can be a provider, acting extra sweet in front of others, though a majority are also just pranks.

Do not trust any chocolates he gives you, they probably have something weird in them. He gives a candy apple and then it's secretly an onion not an apple, gremlin. He is finding out what accent they think is sexy, learning to mimic it, and then using it whisper "hey little mama let me whisper in your ear" and then stick his tongue in their ear. GREMLIN.

If they aren't the type to naturally give Kokichi the attention and reactions he desires, he's definitely shifting into tugging pigtails mode. His bullying gets louder and more physical, basically forcing them to shut him up, or fight back. Any time he can get them to basically push him away, or talk to him he's on cloud nine. He probably also flirts a lot more brazenly and less jokingly, he is standing on a table as he bickers just so he can be at head height so when they lean in to argue more with him he can be like "mmm you know you've got a pretty way to shut me up right now if you wanted~"

To him if he's tugging pigtails it's very much a game of trying to fluster and react, wanting to pull you into his whirlwind through your emotions, he'll never make the first move and kiss because that's boring. He'll flirt and tease and offer, but he wants them to make the first move, to give into their emotions and just be unable to hold back kissing him.

Either way I think he'd also just be a bit quieter? Like with other's he's nonstop but he pauses with a love interest to just kinda, take a moment to mentally snapshot their smile, the way their jaw clenches, just, taking it in quietly so he doesn't lose it too soon, though it always wears off quickly.

I also feel like if he wanted to be romantically involved with someone he wouldn't relax any on like the manipulating and isolating them to ensure they turn to him for help with anything. Especially if they already have partners, if they have partners he's latching onto them harder then they latch onto their interest lmao so they can keep an eye on things and find an excuse for why he should break them up for their own good.

Like if it was platonic he'd do background checks, break into the partners phone, somewhat more normal controlling stuff, but if he's romantically interested he WILL stalk them in all reaches of life to a point he might know more about them then his ACTUAL crush and if he can't find any dirt he will actively try and make dirt by trying to get someone to seduce them and then take blackmail pictures. He will Reynolds Pamphlet their asses.

However, some miracle he's juuuust sane enough to pull back on like, a potential kidnapping. He knows logically how damaging that could be and could result in a lot of uncomfy feelings of not knowing if they actually like him, or are trying to appease him which he doesn't want for them. If he wants to date he wants to know it was at least mostly your own will or else he feels skeevy.

The idea of someone he's trying to gently break down and build back up kissing him in a desperate attempt to win favor? Gross as hell, skeeves him out. He cares too deeply for his obsessions and them being comfortable and happy for that to fly. So if he's from the start romantically interested himself? He's doing everything to avoid that kind of dynamic and situation. If he grabbed someone platonic and now they get along great and it's been three years and they confess then he'd consider it, but he needs them to want him or else he just feels like he's taking advantage of something he can't take back.

So the odds get a lot lower, trying to focus more on wooing and luring them to come willingly and then locking the doors behind them then just stuffing them into the trunk of the clown car. He'll still do it if he feels it's for their safety or he's really getting tired of getting nowhere, it's just a lot longer until it reaches that point, plus he isn't getting bored of the game easily because its NEW, he just unlocked a bonus mode! a secret level! he can't rage quit so soon! Though in say, a killing game kind of situation, they would be nabbed near immediately.

Once they're actually dating he's actually a rather loving partner, in his own way. He does a lot of casual gestures, and only half of them are pranks in disguises! Lots of nicknames, and teasing all "you liiiike me thats so embarassiiing for you." Very clingy, he is hanging off their arm talking about how he's their eye candy. He's also physical in a bit of a different way, his touch is more slow, more soft, more like he's thinking or pondering about how soft the skin is, or wanting to just, slow down a bit for a moment, he will gently trace their arm, marveling on the little details, wanting to just, breathe and learn all about it, then a few minutes later he bites because he needed everyone to know it was his and he had a case of cuteness aggression. Balance in all things.

It's weird to say he slows down but I think he kinda does, he wants to savor it, not eat it as fast possible. He's still rushing around and pulling them into wild escapades and pushing their comfort zones, but he's also very much down for just, sitting with them. He never thought he could like a quiet moment so much until he's sitting there reading quietly with them asleep against his shoulder.

He feels a contentment that's rare for him, as while he adores all the other members they also wind up his energy pretty inherently. A partner winds it down though, makes him want to stay in one place, and he marvels at that. Taking lots of naps with them or just laying on their lap getting his head pet. It's cute.

He's very protective of them but also wanting to push them further and more, which can lead to his behavior shifting between overprotective to maybe should be a little more protective, his sense of scale for danger is weird and it makes him coddle his partner in ways that seem completely incompatible with the way he just lets them faceplant.

As for balancing DICE and his partner, I think after a few weeks of just pining he adapts pretty quickly, it's just obsession Plus after all. No reason to reinvent the wheel. They might get some special privilege like first pick of snack because of dating rights, but they do also have to do chores as well and they couldn't get away with being mean to the other members outside of the usual banter of DICE.

He's also not shy about his partner to DICE, while it's HIS partner they're still a member after all! So the usual lack of boundaries between members isn't super reduced, he's more then happy to cuddle his partner on the couch and then have all of dice converge for a giant cuddle pile, the ideal honestly, though he might pretend to act aghast and say they've been cheated on if they find their partner just casually chilling in a cuddle pile without him, but it's all in good humor, he's glad they're getting along!

For anything more adult, to be super brief he wouldn't engage as he is so so so ace in my eyes the idea wouldn't even cross his mind, but he would be willing to help them out if asked.

So in the end Kokichi does act differently, but it's more in his methods then in his results, and while they would be on some level his favorite DICE member, that doesn't actually impact the other DICE members beyond him maybe giving his partner the more fun chores and extra candy. It's like being beaten out by a 3% affection difference, basically unnoticeable unless you're paying extra attention.

[honkshoo-zzz]

How I see the Mercs within the LBGTQ+ Community

cause i keep seeing people posting things and EVERYONE KEEPS GETTING IT WRONG!! /j who cares i jus wanna make a funky list too

Scout: Def Bisexual, Trans ftm (can take or leave)

Probably has a preference for women

Probably doesn’t realize he likes men until he works with them 24/7 and all of his coworkers are hunky n sweaty and maybe a lil flirty

If trans, used Sex Bom tattoo to cover top surgery scars. Even though it’s definitely just worse than just having ts scars lmao

Soldier: Bisexual and Poly

I just love him dating Zhanna and Demo honestly

Fuck it, other mercs too, if they wanted

Tbh I also fuck with aro/ace vibes for him, he’s just kinda around for a good time with the homies in my mind. Both is good

I do see his preference being fairly equal though. Too busy thinking about his love for the US to think too much about tiddies/ass/etc.

Pyro: Def Ace, and either Aro or Lesbian in my mind. Also Nonbinary.

Either gender-fluid or just straight-up no gender enby. no in-between in my eyes.

I’m mostly all for Aro/Ace Pyro but I saw some Pyro x Ms. Pauling art and. love that. ugh, decisions…

Feel like they use whatever pronouns. Don’t gaf, will never gaf

Also no sex cause the suit just doesn’t come off. Also too busy setting shit on fire to care. More important shit to do.

Demoman: Pansexual and Poly

Again, dating Soldier who is also dating Zhanna

He’s also in a longterm relationship with Eyelander. Don’t ask too many questions about how that works though. But they are.

Also doesn’t have a gender-preference (obviously, he’s married to a sword). Semi-opportunistic in that sense, I guess (again he’s married to a sword. how many times do i gotta—)

Heavy: Bisexual, preference for Men

Idk man but Heavy and Medic have been married for a long time in my eyes

Also I feel like he participated in his sisters’ longing to “see another man” while living in Russia, had a similar reaction to meeting Medic upon taking the Merc job as Zhanna meeting Scout/Soldier

(For those who have yet to read the comics, that reaction basically just being: “you are man. I am horny. let’s bang.” and Medic would just be like o///o “aight” I think)

Biggest trans supporter tho, idk why but it just makes sense he would be the first to punch the teeth out a transphobe. Defends other mercs when confronted about gender shit 100%

Engineer: Bisexual, preferring Women; ftm Trans

The more top surgery art I see of him, the more I fall in love with trans Engie. It’s basically canon to me now. You can take this from my cold, dead hands.

Idk not much else to say. He’s a switch, though, if that adds much of anything HXSKFJEJX

No bottom surgery in my mind, either. Just makes his own straps n shit, cause he can (one of his 11 PhDs was in sex, actually, did you know?)

Medic: Gay, ftm Trans (again, can take or leave)

The most bottom-gay I’ve ever seen, personally (idk how else to phrase it, forgive me)

Again, I feel like he’s been married to Heavy for a long time

If trans, did his own top and bottom surgery, probably at the same time, cause he knew he could and he’s fucking insane (scars are a little wild as a result but he wears them with pride)

Sniper: Gay. das it HFSKFJEK

Gay, but the type of guy where you’d never know til his fuckin boyfriend walks out and kisses him or sum

Also he’s exclusively a top in my mind. Idk why but I feel like he’s got control issues HHEEKLEDP

Again, not super out-spoken about his sexuality, but *will* go out of his way to stab a homophobe. Not kill them from a distance, specifically stab. Shit’s more personal that way (is that too morbid? sorry)

Spy: Bisexual, Genderfluid

Another bottom, but will top if needed (like with most women, if he somehow gets with *another* bottom, etc.)

He’s also a whore. A slut, even. Good for him.

OH AND GENDERFLUID omg. Saw some stuff about that recently so it’s new to my pea brain but I like it.

Again, like Sniper, I feel like he wouldn’t really talk about his gender stuff a lot, but would discover this of himself when disguising himself as women and just feeling. Just as comfortable, if not more comfortable as them at times.

Kinda sensitive about it, though, probably. Will stab anyone who mentions it while he’s figuring it out. But gets better upon meeting the mercs and their gay-asses, lmao

“holy shit it’s not that crazy to like to have boobs sometimes” type-beat.

ok i’m done. again feel free to add stuff, fight me (like, as a bro), or whatever. Love talking about it cause I love these lil weirdos. Probably too much. oh well hdkafjejfk

[thexsanctuaryx]

ʚ♡ɞ I'll Follow You Into the Dark ʚ♡ɞ

➳ PREVIOUS CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

{ summary: } emma and steven talk and the boys find out more about her. a plan is hatched...hopefully... { pairing: } | eventual | original character { emma harper } x steven grant, emma harper x jake lockley, && emma harper x marc spector { contents: } mental hospitals, psychiatric hold, angst { I guess? I don’t know what else to call it. }, hurt/comfort-esque vibes { warnings: } severe mental illness { psychosis, hallucinations, depression }, main character is actively in psychosis, I’ve done my best to write it in the least triggering way but there are a lot of heavy themes that will take place in this series, so forewarning. mental hospitals. typical misunderstanding and misinterpretation that comes with psychosis. due to the nature of emma’s psychosis, things are very unhealthily skewed in a religious context. triggering themes related to the aforementioned, vague mentions of abuse { author’s note: } I recently finished reading "tear down my reason" by @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction and it inspired me to work on an idea I’ve been playing with about emma and the boys meeting while both in a mental hospital at the same time. I wanted to write a series that would help other people with severe mental illness feel seen and heard as there really aren't works out there like this, especially not actually written by people with firsthand experience of things like psychosis. this series is being written with a lot of love and care so I truly hope that it can be cathartic for those who read who might also live with mental illness because you DO matter and your stories DO deserve to be told. { word count: } 924 { taglist: } @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @sub-aro

Emma plays with her fingers lightly some more, chewing on her lower lip as she looks at Steven.

Steven who – despite himself – can’t seem to stop himself from looking back at her with a soft, almost lovesick expression over his features. Almost – he lies to himself.

“You’re not American—like the others…” Emma observes.

It snaps Steven out of his thoughts.

“Oh—no, no—not really, I suppose…”

Emma nods, “I didn’t know angels could be British…”

“Oh I’m not—I mean—we—we’re not angels, love…”

Emma shakes her head, “I think you are…”

Steven has to once again try to stop himself from melting. He doesn’t intentionally want to confuse her but the words slip out before he can do anything about it.

“The only angel here is you.”

Emma frowns slightly, trying to piece it together in her struggling mind.

There’s a soft chuckle in his head from Jake, as Marc calls to him. ‘Steven, she’s gonna take you literally, buddy…’

“Right—sorry—I didn’t mean literally, love—I was just—well I s’pose I was just trying to—give you a compliment.” He corrects himself.

This only causes her to flush, looking away as she openly tries not to smile. A soft, “oh” escaping her lips.

Her mind seems to shift quickly, her expression saddening, a pout at her lips.

“What happens when we leave this place?”

Steven is somewhat caught off guard when she seems to take a dip emotionally. His chest tightening.

“Well—they release us and we get to go home…”

Emma only looks more troubled.

“What if I don’t want to go home?”

“Sorry?”

‘Keep her talking, Steven…’ Jake speaks up, just having a feeling something isn’t right by her response. ‘I wanna know what we’re up against.’

“Why don’t you want to go home, angel?”

She swallows roughly, her arms slipping around herself to hug her middle as if trying to hold herself together at the question. She shakes her head quickly, avoiding eye contact.

There’s a round of Spanish cursing in his head.

‘She’s completely shutting down—find out what you can, Steven.’ Marc’s voice tightens.

“D’you live alone?” He asks softly.

Emma shakes her head again, releasing a strained exhale.

“Is there someone at home that makes you feel—unsafe?”

Emma is quick to nod, hugging herself tighter.

“But you’re safe here—well maybe not here exactly—but right now, with, with us—you know that?”

She nods again.

“Good girl,” he says softly, searching out her eyes.

“D’you have a partner—that makes you feel unsafe?”

Jake is already cursing again, ‘I’ll fucking kill him…’

Emma shakes her head again, attempting to speak, “my—my m-mom…”

A shock goes through their system, a quiet, ‘oh baby…’ escaping from Marc.

“Your mum, makes you feel unsafe?” Steven seeks confirmation.

Emma nods quickly again, sniffling and squeezing her eyes shut as tears burn at them.

She tries to find the words, “if I have to go back home—does that mean—does that mean I’m going to hell?”

‘She did not just compare her home to hell…’ Marc seethes.

Steven moves closer, slowly so as not to scare her, showing her his hands before he brings them to cradle her face. He waits for her eyes to meet his, brushing away the tears the fall. “You’re not going to go to hell, love…”

‘We can’t let her go back there.’ Marc cuts in darkly.

‘I’m working on it, hermano…’ Jake agrees.

Emma falls into almost silent breathless sobs, her body trembling.

“Fuck the rules…” Steven mutters before protectively pulling her into his arms.

Emma immediately clings to him, because she does feel safer when they’re around. Safer than she’s maybe ever felt with anyone else.

She holds onto him as long as she can, everything seeming to slow down even for the moment.

‘We need to find out where she lives—’ Marc cuts through the silence.

‘We don’t even know her last name, Marc—and we can’t just ask her for her address…’

‘I don’t trust her mother—especially not in her current state. Hell, she could be the reason Emma went into psychosis in the first place.’

‘Steven.’ Jake interjects.

Steven smoothes over Emma’s hair, holding her against himself. When he pulls back, he cradles her face with one hand.

“What if—when we get out of this place—we came to see you?” He pauses, looking her over softly and speaking quietly. “Would that be alright, love?”

Emma nods quickly, screwing her fist in her eye as she pouts.

“We’ll give you our number, yeah? And you can just call us when you want to see us…” He brushes his thumb over her cheek.

Again, she nods vigorously, holding up a finger but not speaking as she disappears into her room for a moment.

He gives her a puzzled look, waiting for her to come back.

When she returns, she hands him a piece of paper that she’s scribbled her name and phone number on.

Steven only brightens, speaking softly so as not to overwhelm her.

“Emma Harper—that’s you?” He says fondly.

She gives a soft sob of a laugh, nodding again.

Taking the paper back, pen still in hand, she flips it over against a wall and scrawls her address on the back. She then hands it back.

“Thank you…” He says, giving her a gentle smile as he finds her eyes again.

‘Very good, Steven.’ Jake voices proudly in their headspace as Marc breathes a sigh of relief.

[m1ss-n0mer]

VENT

My mother is so annoying about gender/sexuality. She says she’s supportive and she’s probably trying to be but she’s just not good at it.

I go by he or it. My mother knows this. Usually she refers to me using she/her but she remembers she shouldn’t if we happen to be talking about gender. In those cases she uses they/them even though I have repeatedly told her those aren’t my fucking pronouns.

Also once I made a joke about maybe getting top surgery when I’m older and she was so horrified all she talked about for the next few months was how bad an idea transition, and she still does sometimes even though it’s died down. Her reasons being:

Testosterone causes people to be more reckless and aggressive. After you take it you dream less, you get fat, you grow more body hair, you become less desirable, and you can’t get pregnant if you want to.

You pay so much money for it, and it’s all just plastic surgery companies saying that everything will be better if you do it

She says those who are happy with the results are only happy because of the sunken cost fallacy

She ‘has a friend’ who works with trans ppl and says that all trans men only want it to pass and they usually aren’t happy with the results

She ‘has a friend’ who works for cps and has met trans kids who ‘just seem to think everything will get better when they transition’

Women who lost their breasts because of cancer really miss them and it’s a tragedy

I should keep looking like a conventionally attractive girl so that I can get better jobs

She joined a fb page of trans men and described them all as ‘fat, ugly, hairy, boring looking, etc’ and said how they looked prettier before they transitioned. I looked at some of the pictures. They looked fine and even if they didn’t, they looked visibly happier

‘Your brain isn’t fully mature until 25 so you should wait until that age to know for sure’

Trans people should learn to be comfortable in their bodies

I’d have to shave more so it wouldn’t be worth it (I also wouldn’t bleed so hard every month that I faint and throw up if it’s too hot but ok)

Top surgery scars are ugly and my future partners will hate me for getting rid of my perfect, gorgeous breasts

Also I casually mentioned I might be on the aro and/or ace spectrum at one point, and she just went on about how relationships ‘don’t necessarily form because of love, but because of circumstance’ and how ‘you won’t be able to find a partner who doesn’t want sex.’

Also I mentioned that one of my friends is asexual and she just straight up said it ‘must be because of trauma.’

Also she seems think the only reason I know my identity so well is because I was ‘given too much time to think about it’

Also ALSO whenever I ask for masc things like buying a binder or wearing a suit to an event rather than a dress, she’s not that receptive. (In the former case I had to remind her several times and in the latter she wanted me to at least wear SOMETHING feminine because I’m genderfluid not a full trans boy, so I ended up wearing sth more femme than I would have liked. Then she suggested we make a more feminine version just in case I feel like a girl that day. THAT IS THE FEMININE VERSION.

And I’d not even mention the bit about having to remind her to buy me a binder but when I expressed a SLIGHT interest in make up, the bought me a massive box to experiment with several days later. Like, she’s clearly desperate to have someone feminine because she finds masculinity unattractive.

[iveraines]

🔎Detective Headcanons Dump☕️

(+ board thing)

as stated on various pinterest icons and in the wiki, it’s conflicted on her name. for a while she was thought to be called sarah, but the drone that’s actually sarah is the one that said “mr doorman, there’s been an incident.” however, she’s still referred to as sarah. there’s so many conflicts. but as a compromise, i’ve been calling her sara. (little secret- it’s a name i no longer go by. the sarah/sara beef is REAL. that H has caused a massive divide in the sara/sarah world.) (no joke i actually had a HUGE rivalry with a “sara” until i realized i was nonbinary and changed my name LMAO)

-and yes, she has beef. (maybe a bit of homoerotic tension.) (QPR.) (if a rivalry lasts a long time you are no longer rivals you are gay. /ref)

-as mentioned in the other post: there’s other name options too.

A) she purposely never tells anyone her name unless they are closer friends, as she’s a very down-to-business woman. “My name’s not important right now, but this case is. Now back the hell off, this is a crime scene.”

B) her peers purposely never name her correctly and call her something different every time. plot twist- they never even asked for it, and it kinda drives her insane. “Mary, you seen my lunch?” “Any notes, Sara?” “Lissa went missing at that crime scene.” “Shirley’s on her lunch break right now.” she enjoys people trying to guess her name. they’ve probably gotten it right once or twice, but she won’t tell them. >:-)

C) or they just call her “detective”, but this plays into option A a lot.

D) like B, different name each time. but she’s the one who tells people a different name, instead of them trying to guess. at this point she’s collecting names like pokemon.

-“mister doorman, there’s been an incident🤓”. she thinks sarah’s dorkiness is adorable. the two are quite close. maybe a QPR.

-she’s an arospec lesbian (i’m not just projecting here, i came up with this headcanon before i realized i was aro lol)

“do we even have fingerprints?”

-despite it being her job, the reason that she asks this question is because of different models. the drones we see on screen have the little dents in their fingers, but it’s possible that other models don’t or have different shapes.

-in my head-canon, gasoline is the drone equivalent to coffee or energy drinks. don’t talk to her until she’s had her gasoline. i have a whole list of headcanons for different machine fluids (grease, antifreeze, coolant, etc) i have more headcanons for those, but i’ll probably post them later.

-from what we can gather of her personality, she’s very blunt, sarcastic, and gets annoyed quite easily but doesn’t make much fuss. something will bother her but she’ll still keep a level head.

-also, think khan’s demeanor in the brief scenes we saw him in episode 7. “Part 2A, check the perimeter”. straight to business, doesn’t fuck around

-if she hadn’t been killed by eldritch J, she’d probably have a crush on J and get along quite well due to similar personality.

-outside of her WDF uniform coat, she probably wears lots of muted/navy blues, greys, and browns. her style is usually an oversized flannel shirt, button-ups, or aviator jacket. maybe a sweater similar to the teacher’s. it depends on the day. i’ve gathered some outfits from pinterest as a rough idea.

-she’s really into yoga and similar workouts along that vein. she played tennis in high school.

-her ideal date night is a night in on the couch, binge watching crime documentaries and/or thrillers. (though she prefers not to date.)

-she’s well-respected within the WDF. got on a winning streak at cards.

-she often gets quite bored at her job, usually because there is nothing to do. she saw the disassembly drones getting into the colony as a good thing solely because it gave her something to do versus waiting around all day for something to happen.

-her music taste is mostly classic rock. guns n roses, queen, van halen, bon jovi, nirvana, kiss, black sabbath, pink floyd, AC/DC, rolling stones, etc

-here’s a miscellaneous mood board that i threw together with things i think are fitting for her

[oddballtumbles]

Building a Percy Jackson OC in my head right now. Have not read the books in years, I plan to reread them, just can’t right now. But this just WON’T leave me alone.

(Adult language and shit btw)

Daughter of Hephaestus, her mom met him in her early 20s, girl is 7/12, mom was pregnant 7 times, multiple sets of twins. ALL of them are kids of Hephaestus, their house is basically warded against monsters because by the time the second set of twins were on their way, Mom had enough and made Hephaestus deal with it. Hades now has a state of the art fetch machine for Cerberus, and monsters don’t bother her family until she dies. (Spoiler alert, Momma achieves minor godhood eventually due to popular demand and the invention of … something I haven’t decided yet; but it accidentally causes no monsters to be able to go after her bloodline. EVER lol)

Daughter is NOT an engineer (most of her siblings are engineers, tech developers, etc) but is thorough in SASS, and is more of a tinker type. The kind of person who knows random stuff and always carries ducktape but is more likely to only quick fix then refer you to professional than actually fix the problem. Just because the crack is taped doesn’t mean the bucket is fixed.

Specific interaction that keeps popping in my head:

Aphrodite (mad about long relationship with her husband, taking it out on the child of said relationship that happens to be in front of her)

Daughter (full of sass and absolutely fucking done with any and all dieties who think they are above the modern world just because they deign to exist within it occasionally. She has read the texts and watched the OSP videos. Nope)

A: I can’t believe anyone would even last that long! What could there possibly be to interest her in him???

D: idk but I can tell you that she likes the chair. Admittedly if she sat in it less there’d be less of us soooo.

A: please I be he’s only paying attention because she is the only one to look back.

D: well seeing as I’m a combo of both of them and when I went to camp everyone tried to send me to your cabin I’m not sure what that says about your poor taste. Or maybe eyesight?

A: are you calling me old?

D: you are literally older than Greece. What do you want me to do with that?

A: you-

D: look I’m just going to say this. If you paid even half as much attention to the husband you say you don’t want as you do to the lover you jerk around like an angry chihuahua, I probably wouldn’t be in your face sassing you.

A: Zeus arranged-

D: Oh please don’t get me started on that slut. We will be here longer than my mother’s been pregnant. Idk why Hera doesn’t just divorce the walking penis. It is a thing that exists! Also her taking out her rage on the kids and victims of his philandering is just avoiding the problem and causing more grief for the rest of us. If it’s some sort role play they are doing, nobody else is consenting the involvement, they both need to stop.

(Shocked silence.)

D: oh please, I cannot be the first to come up with that.

A: I’m not sure whether to smite you or give you a job.

D: I’ve never been smote before! Unless we count that time in the metallurgy which we do not talk to mom about. I came back fine! Barely even counts!

——————

Idk if I want her to have a Greek name or just a random one. I feel like she would get along with PJ-Dionysius in a “let’s drink and get high” kinda way.

She definitely has slept in all the cabins for no reason other than she broke in and felt like it.

Occasionally Hermes feels like she might be threatening his job a little, especially when she worked as a courier with heelies and a skateboard.

She’s ace by the way. Probably aro too, which is why she has no fear in front of Aphrodite.

[circulars-reasoning]

We don’t have inner communication in the sense that like, I “hear” other thoughts. All thoughts kind of sound like mine, but I know they’re supposed to be read with “different tones” if that makes sense? Like I can tell when one alter is Thinking but I know even though his thoughts sound like my thoughts, it’s meant to be heard with a deeper voice. In PRACTICE, it sounds like mine. But it’s supposed to be deeper and when he uses me to talk Physically, with our vocal cords, (we talk out loud to ourselves a lot more than in our brain), our voice starts to deepen (or tries to). Same for one of our other alters, she’s a lot girlier than I am, meaner, more egoic, vindictive (I love her and fortunately she is not like this To me), and has a much more feminine mannerisms and cadence.

I myself am very neutral, voidlike, masc but not a guy, genderfluid but almost always in like an emo-jock way whereas alter 1 is a lot more heaaaavy punk rock, thrasher, belongs in a moshpit, and alter 2 is definitely like. Regina George. Very girly, pretty colors, pink/light blue. We have more alters but these two are the more drastic extremes that make me feel less like I’m faking. They’re also completely different in terms of sexual orientation (which gets so confusing for me as cohost who is almost always cocon to suddenly change my mind about who and what I find attractive), with 1 being a gay man and 2 being a lesbian.

(The rest of us fall somewhere between aro, bi, and ace. I myself have NO clue what I am because I didn’t realize passive influence fucked up my understanding of attraction that badly so idk what my sexuality is outside someone in the upstairs influencing me, I’ve been going with arospec bi ace cause what the fuck.).

But the weirdness of inner communication makes me feel weird and invalid. Nobody really Talks over each other in the way I read about people’s experiences or even my other friend w did does. For me, it’s more like violent storms of emotions coexisting until we feel compelled to Talk Out Loud. I also don’t dissociate as often and most of our switches tend to happen during deep, vivid, lucid dreaming. Sorry this is so long, it’s just a struggle to constantly feel like I’m just someone who wants “friends in head” disorder

Hey, every system is going to look different in its own way -- or for you, maybe sound different too! But keep in mind, I'm also not a "normal" system. I've got a created part, I've always have fantastic communication, I know when I split, I've always been able to switch on command...

It doesn't make me or you fake to be slightly different. And so what if you've misjudged and were wrong? So long as this current label/diagnosis/term/what have you is currently helping you recover, then you're doing well. It doesn't matter if you end up wrong, so long as you are working on growth and recovery. <3

[aro-comics]

Growth (Part 1)

Growth, 1/3 – And … oh my gosh. I can’t believe it took THIS LONG to finish this comic ;A; I feel like I say this every time, but y’all – I STARTED PANELLING THIS ALMOST A WHOLE YEAR AGO. Really. It’s been sitting on my plate for too long, and I’m so glad I can finally share it!

Where do I even begin with my thoughts? For starters, I wanted to say the examples chosen in slide 8 are mainly from larger pieces of media, because they have greater influence on our *general social consciousness*. I don’t necessarily recommend or approve of the source material! I also have more thoughts on these characters, and about amatonormativity in relation to character growth in general, but for the sake of keeping this caption short(er) I will do so on my stories and pin them to my profile for future reference 😂

AUTHOR'S NOTE: For the sake of accessibility (and my own health) I will be making a transcript of the stories in its simplest form, posted here.

If you have any examples you can think of too, please let me know either in the comments or via DM 🐸🐸

I wish I was joking about the events which inspired this comic, but this LITERALLY happened to me, and this wasn’t the only time I experienced some form of amatonormativity or direct arophobia growing up. You may not think things like this are a problem, but this idea of romantic relationships as a crucial part of emotional growth has real world implications. Aros get told that their orientation IS the root of all their problems, or IS THE PROBLEM ITSELF, a lot. And not only is this wrong (and queerphobic), it also causes people to overlook the real issues that we may be struggling with. This can prevent us from getting help we NEED, not to mention the fact that orientation isn’t something that needs to be fixed.

In my personal experience … I don’t want to get into the specifics of the situation described here (Because it genuinely was one of the worst times of my life, and I don’t like thinking about it) – but basically, the help I needed was definitely NOT to get a romantic partner. A lot of my behaviours were very clearly ones that indicated I should have been hospitalized, or at least sent to a highly trained medical professional for intervention. But I never received any care, even though my parents were to some degree aware of what the issue was … and it somewhat appalls me that this family friend would take one look at me and somehow decide the issue was anything less than a serious, medical situation.

I want to emphasize I know none of them did it on purpose, and to be fair, it wasn’t entirely clear what the specific issue was (to the family friend at least). But it does hurt to have so clearly shown signs of crisis, to have done a near 180 in personality and behaviour, and to have it brushed off or implied that this is caused by something fundamental to your orientation. It makes me feel so inherently wrong, and if I’m going to be even more brutally honest I think the amatonormative way I was raised is a big part of the reason why I still struggle with my self esteem as an aro today. Even now, I still get told that maybe my remaining problems and personal struggles will go away if I was willing to give dating a try.

It just makes me so tired.

But, the more I reflect on my orientation and am able to connect with aros and the community as a whole, it has been helping. I don’t think it will go away any time soon, but at least when the feeling (that my orientation is something that’s fundamentally wrong with me) comes up I can tell myself that it just isn’t true. That I know that being aro isn’t a curse, isn’t a flaw, isn’t something that should haunt me for the rest of my life, that it’s something natural and beautiful and that I adore about my community. And I should extend that same care to myself, too. It has been getting easier.

As always, I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences on this topic. Do you feel that others perception of your maturity and growth as a human being is influenced by amatonormativity?

Image Descriptions

Title Card: Cover Image. This Comic series is titled “Growth”. Celia, an east asian girl with wavy chin length hair, is illustrated wearing a cream crop top and yellow pants sitting amongst leaves and yellow flowers on a rocky surface. A watering can sits in the background.

Slide 1: Celia is seen standing from the side, with her arms crossed. She frowns. “When I was going through one of the worst times of my life, a family friend went out of his way to tell my parents that he noticed how unconfident I seemed.”

Slide 2: Scene turns to a memory, depicted as a sketch. The family friend is shown talking to Celia’s parents. “He told them not to worry though, because there was an easy solution. I just needed to find the right person, and start dating them.”

Slide 3: A speech bubble from the family friend illustrates this analogy. On the left is a flower pot with no plant, and a sad face above it. On the right is a blooming flower with hearts around it.

Celia’s note: I wish I was making this up. Blossom was LITERALLY the analogy used here

Slide 4: Back to Celia, who is speaking to the reader now: “It really, really hurt. I knew the reason why I wasn’t the best version of myself wasn’t because I hadn’t found love.”

Slide 5: She stares down at a yellow flower as she continues, “But unfortunately, I think thoughts, and unwarranted comments like these, stem from a deeper amatonormative view of the subject of growth”

Slide 6: “Countless stories which show the hero’s growth as pinned to their romantic arc.” Illustrated beneath is a stereotypical hero kneeling on the ground in front of his love interest. He holds a yellow flower as he says “I couldn’t have become the person I am today without you, your love showed me what’s worth trying for”.

Slide 7: “And on the more toxic side of things, those without romantic love or those who reject it end up as decrepit, cold, emotionally stunted, or sad.”

A few characters from popular, influential, or otherwise notable television shows are depicted here: Cruella de Vil from 101 Dalmations, Queen Chrysalis from My Little Pony (Generation 4), Dr. Berkowitz from One Day at a Time, Alan Harper from Two and a Half Men, and Rajesh Koothrappali from The Big Bang Theory. A note indicates to the reader to check the description.

As a disclaimer: The inclusion of these characters do not indicate the author’s recommendation or approval of the original source material – they are only meant to serve as examples of the point to be made.

Slide 8: Scene switches to Celia now watering a collection of ferns, mugworts, and other leafy plants in a greenhouse. She says “As an aro person, it’s tiring to hear the more toxic side of this narrative again and again. It feels like we’re being told we won’t grow, like others can.”

[lustbile]

Burn

Jeno X Reader

Word Count: 4.7k

Warnings: oof alright so. Extreme sadomasochism, human ashtray/burning fetish (if that’s a thing idk), dacryphilia, use of drugs, rimming/oral (reader receiving), anal play, just a lot of intense stuff, and Jeno and the reader are both just absolute freaks let be honest.

please read warnings. alright this is definitely not as intense as some things i’ve seen but I do think it’s probably the most intense thing i’ve posted maybe??? maybe not i’ve written some weird things. but yes seriously don’t ignore warnings.

“And you’re a hundred percent sure you want me to do this?” His fingers press into the flesh of your ass, waiting until you turn your head to the side and gently nod against the bedding, “It’s gonna hurt pretty bad.”

“I know,” you sigh out, almost dreamily. Your thighs spread wider across his lap as you sink lower onto your stomach, “I just really do think I’ll like it, but you don't have to do it if you don't want to.”

“I think thats the issue,” he huffs, bringing the shortening roach to his lips and taking a pull that’s probably just burnt, useless bud at this point, but at least doing something that will focus his thoughts, “I want to do it so fucking bad.”

“So you do want to burn me, Jeno?” You ask in a tone that turns more taunting, your hips shifting back and forth as a minuscule part of you hopes he sticks the burning paper and ash to you by accident, “Why? Wanna see me cry or something?”

Yes. The answer to that was yes. He didn’t even need to verbalize because you knew if there was one thing Jeno loved to do, it was to make you cry.

Yes. The answer to that was yes. He didn’t even need to verbalize because you knew if there was one thing Jeno loved to do, it was to make you cry.

“You’re high,” he says with a stressed and quiet laugh, as if the cotton-like feeling behind your eyes and under your tongue would let you forget that fact, “fuck, I’m high too so I don’t know…”

“Better I’m high than stone cold sober,” you say, more so just speaking out loud, “probably will hurt less if I’m high and I can ease into the pain if we ever do something like this sober.”

It probably would have also never been brought up in the first place if I wasn’t high, you add in your head. The idea of letting your boyfriend purposefully put a joint out on your skin comes from a lot of pain kink exploration and a stranger from twitter with too much time and imagination on their hands. Would it be the first time Jeno has caused you physical pain in the name of sexual release? Absolutely not even close, but it was a pretty intense request you suppose.

He drums his fingers against your ass again a few times, falling into a quick rhythm as you can tell he’s getting more excited about the idea than he’d ever admit. The thick paper of the filter scrapes against your skin as he does so, making your heart thump at the idea of the other end taking its place against your sensitive flesh.

“Do you want me to count to three?” He finally asks, making your breath catch in your throat.

“No… I think I’d rather it take me by surprise.”

“Ah okay cool…”

There’s a heavy silence afterwards, both of you simmering in ideas of how it could become a surprise now.

“Hold this,” he mutters, putting the dwindling joint between your teeth and letting you puff on it just enough to keep the angry fire at the end alive. Once his hands are free he starts to make work of your underwear, the only remaining fabric on your body, similarly to the thin pair of boxer briefs that clings to the narrow hips of the boy behind you. Something about getting high alone with him always results in some shedding of clothes, whether the night ends in sex or not, as you presume hot boxing a room with your partner would make you want to be as uncovered as possible.

He pushes your feet against your thighs for a moment, bending your knees so he can wiggle on your underwear without making you get off his lap. It takes a moment, the fabric getting caught around your knees and then your toes, but once they’re off he throws them unceremoniously on the floor.

“Fuck,” he mutters to himself once he catches sight of the wet heat between your thighs, a sigh of your own following once you catch how deep his voice drops.

He seems to forget briefly about the joint between your teeth as his hands start to wander. His thumbs get so close to where you’d wanted him since the weed reached your brain, and with a quiet sticking noise, he pulls at your skin to watch your arousal drip from your body.

A sudden feeling washes over you as he stares and watches you like it's the first time he’s ever seen you, and without thinking you squirm and let out a whine to remind him there is in fact a human in charge of the body underneath his twitching hands. A very impatient human at that.

“I can take that back,” he huffs, reaching for the roach that still rests in your mouth, the whining and squirming only being partners to the drooling you started that has dampened the filter.

He takes the short roach between his fingers as carefully as he can, kissing your shoulder gently as he slowly pulls away. His mouth continues, trailing down to your shoulder blade and the side of your rib, until your ass pressing against his stomach causes too much of a wedge and he can only brush his lips against your skin like a whisper.

Once he’s back to the way he was seated, the hand holding the joint returns to your hip, and his lips join not long after. He kisses right at the crease where your ass meets your thigh and when he noses inward until he can lick at the wetness that has stuck to the inside of your thighs, you gasp.

You gasp again when his free hand travels behind him. First landing on the sole of your foot a trailing so softly up that it tickles the flesh and you involuntarily kick up. He takes the jerking movement for granted, grabbing your ankle and pushing it up until your knee is bent and your foot is wiggling against your ass in the way it was when he removed your underwear.

He uses your trapped ankle to spread your legs farther, his mouth following the movement to lick around your cunt and ignoring the way you clench around nothing.

Your hips tilt back and up, trying to take how hungrily he mouths at you as meaning he’s too lost in thought to notice if you moved your hips in the exact perfect position. But unfortunately he moves swiftly with you, licking up to the curve of your ass before he harshly sinks his teeth into the flesh.

You let out a yelp, that you think must be much louder than it actually is, and your hips start gyrating helplessly as you wish for just some form of friction.

You take his release of your ankle as a good sign, and you take the way his hands travel to your waist to pull you back until your clit brushes against the fabric covering his crotch as an even better sign. But as you're panting and grinding against the growing bulge between his thighs, you feel it.

It’s not a sudden feeling, almost like a sting of a fire ant bite or pouring antiseptic onto a paper cut. But it grows and it's hot, and before you know it you can feel the way the embers have started to scorch your flesh and smell a burning that you can only correlate to the smell of burning leather.

You let out a pathetically quiet yell, a sob wracking your chest right after and choking it before it can become too loud. Your fists twist into the sheets by your head, your skin blossoms red around the point he presses the dying joint against your skin, and tears spring to your eyes almost as quickly as the new flood of arousal spills from between your thighs.

It bites at where your ass meets your back, towards the curve of the side of your hip. You can still feel the paper sticking to you, the once concerned boy behind you enraptured now with the sights and taking his time to make sure every remaining blossom of burning red is put out and you’re left with nothing but the grey soot of ashes and a telling circular patch of raw flesh.

He tosses the crumpled paper into the floor, the sad thing landing perfectly next to your underwear. Jeno doesn’t really notice either though and his hand mirrors his other again and holds onto your waist as you body shakes and you try to catch your breath.

“Are you good?” He asks with clear concern in his voice, but it does nothing to cover how equally excited he is at the sign of your squirming pain.

“J-e-eno-o,” you stutter out as you feel like your speaking around your own heart lodged in your throat, “fuck me, fuck me please.”

He reaches out, grabbing at your elbow and tugging until you're twisted enough for him to see your face, and once he sees the tears streaming down your face he grunts. But once he follows the streaked trails up your cheeks and sees the wild look in your eyes, he’s going back to the part of you still settled and twitching in his lap as he reaches to pull your ass apart.

In the quiet of the room you can hear the sound of his tongue swishing in his mouth just barely over your panting. He leans down, kissing gently at the still stinging burn before trailing to your tailbone, until eventually he hovers enough to let the accumulated spit fall from his mouth and tail down until it hits the place of your body he’s seemed to have some form of infatuation with lately.

He’s quick to follow the trail of saliva with a pointed tip of his tongue, laying it flat once he reaches your asshole, and making you let out a rattling gasp. Similarly to the putting a joint out on your skin situation, the idea of ass play started as a joke between you two, and it’s now as he laps at your rim and dips as much as the end of it inside you, you’re starting to think joking with this boy may be dangerous.

He gets his fill, pulling away briefly a few times just to come in with quick and harsh licks, before he trails down to where you really need him.

His hands wrap around the tops of your thighs, tugging you up until your back arches and aches and your face is shoved carelessly into the mattress. But you can’t find it in yourself to care much about the degrading position he’s left you in, because after all but shoving his face into you to take in a deep breath, his lips wrap tightly around your clit.

You can feel your face heating up rapidly, and you're unsure if it’s just from the suddenly intense pleasure after such biting pain, or if it’s also because of how shameless his actions are all of the time.

“Jeno, oh my fucking god,” you choke out, reaching blindly behind you in attempt to grab at his scalp, but the way he’s detached from your clit to lay his tongue flat and shake his head rapidly side to side makes it hard to catch his wiggling head.

The way he grunts and groans into your skin is maddening, the level in which he genuinely enjoys getting you all over his tongue and face bordering on detrimental for you in a number of ways.

His arms twist under you one at a time, hooking under your hips until his hands can come up and link together against your back, letting him press you as tightly against his face as the atoms between you will allow. You’re surprised he’s yet to suffocate himself between your thighs, but both you and him seem to be enjoying it too much for you to worry about it.

His blunt nails dig into your back as harshly as he can manage when you start rocking back onto his face, grinning and groaning against your skin when you gasp in the way that tells him that fresh tears are threatening to spill over.

It hurts a lot. The way his nails scratch you, the tension in your muscles from the way he manhandles you, the way he nips and bites at you every time he pulls away for a breath, and especially the raw burn that screams from your hip. But it also feels so good, and overwhelming as the pain glides across your nerves right alongside your impending orgasm.

There’s very little warning you can give Jeno, gasping breaths and whines being almost enough, but they fall on deaf ears. He’s lost himself against you, eating at you like he’ll be able to taste the secrets of the world on his tongue, and if making you come wasn’t the end goal, he wouldn’t have started in the first place.

“God, fuck!” you choke out, your hand coming down to slap at the mattress as your back arches deeply and your toes curl as you kick your feet up beside him until they’re hitting his shoulders.

Your kicking does nothing to deter him as he licks you through the overwhelming amounts of pain and pleasure your body feels at once, and as he goes on the feeling of him pushing you past the initial beginnings of your orgasm has you gasping from a new form of ache.

You’ve gone slack in his hands, his grip on your legs being the only thing that keeps you from melting completely into the bed below you and shaking from the onslaught of stimuli. Your thighs tighten around his head, subconsciously trying to push him out and away as he hums happily as if you’ve given him his favorite treat.

He finally lets up after a moment, your constant squirming and whining become more than he can ignore. He drops you slowly back in his lap, and as if his eyes are drawn to it like a magnet, he glances at the circular burn he left on your skin.

He’s afraid to say much about it, afraid to let you know how much he really enjoyed seeing the act wrack you with burning, stinging pain. But as you lay twitching in his lap, jaw slack as you reach back to fumble with the band of his underwear, he thinks you probably did enjoy it just as much as him.

He pushes at you as gently as he can, lifting you up enough for him to shift below you until he’s sitting up on his knees. Once he's situated, you feel his hand pressing on the center of your back, forcing it to curve and bend to his liking. He leans down, letting his own body follow the curvature of yours, and when you see the soft smile he offers you from the peripheral of your blurry eyes, you find it hard to believe it’s the same man who likes to push burning joints into your skin and make you cry.

“I’m gonna fuck you,” he says. It’s not a question, but you know your ability to say no is there, “I’m gonna fuck you and make you cry even harder than that fucking joint did.”

Part of you wants to curl into a ball. The depth that his voice reached when he spoke to you shaking your insides already and making you a tad nervous along with the way you know your body will be screaming later. But a much bigger part of you, the one that wants him inside of you so bad you think you might start drooling like a rabid animal, lifts up into his body and silently begs him to get on with it.

You hear a shift of fabric, his underwear coming down just enough for him to pull himself out, before he begins to tap his tip gently against your skin. Similar to the journey his tongue took, he presses himself high up near your tailbone, dragging it down against your sensitive skin until the leaking head of his dick bumps against your clit.

You sigh for the millionth time, your shoulders sinking down as you put the rest of your strength into grinding back into him. He grunts and mutters in response, and if you were able to look back at him now you’d see him with his brow furrowed and his jaw locked and tense as he’s almost hypnotized by the magic that is your body.

The first inch of him that slides into you is a lot for the both of you to handle. For you it's always a task taking the length and size of him, feeling as if every time you're testing fate to let him split you completely in half. For him it’s a task to not knowingly split you in half. Taking his time and being patient is a foreign concept to him a majority of the time, so letting you adjust to the way he knows he stretches you to your limits is a patience he had to learn.

The way you shake as he slides in deeper and deeper has him gritting his teeth, and below him you're breathing is labored and your stomach tense. He somehow lights everyone of your nerves on fire every single time, and when he grapples at your body to help you sink down further, and his finger simply brushes against your newly crafted wound, you let out a shuttering gasp that’s perfectly mixed with pain, shock, and arousal.

He shushes you, rubbing his hands down your back, and mutters things that have you debating whether or not he touched the burn on purpose. But your internal debate is short lived, as he’s now seated fully inside you and has started to shallowly rock against you.

“You say stop and I’ll stop, you know the drill,” and he’s right, you do. Your agreed upon safe word sticking back to your mind, but you can’t find anything in you that even considers muttering it, “but until then I”m having my way with you.”

“Jeno,” you start, turning your face again in an attempt to give him soft eyes and a dopey smile, “please I need you so bad. You hurt me so good.”

You see his Adam’s apple bob even with how fuzzy your vision has gotten, your words getting to him but also causing a mean smile to pull across his lips. His hands tighten against your skin, rough enough that you can already feel bruises forming under his touch, and he shifts you around like a doll until you’re flush against him.

The first thrust he delivers knocks the wind from you, a pitched gasp falling from your lips as you flutter around him. Every thrust is sharp and unrelenting, making you feel every inch, bump, and curve of him inside you.

Your mouth falls open, no longer closer like it was earlier when you were mindlessly babbling, but instead just making way for long strings of moans and hiccups and he does exactly as he promised, and has his way with your crumbling body.

The first of his hands to move was jarring but more simple to handle. It slowly slips up your back, kneading at your shoulders as if to comfort you, before he pushes against the back of your neck and leans his weight into it to hold you down. You cough, and let out a small gurgling noise before your body and muddled mind finally just lands on a pathetic whine.

His second hand doesn’t move as far, but it does move more cautiously. You feel him leaning back, slowing his thrusts for only a second to give him space to drop another mouthful of spit on down onto your ass. And as it drips against your skin, you feel him brush his thumb through it until he presses the digit deep into you.

He uses the leverage having his thumb pressed into you gives him to force you back against his hips. Your face digs deep into the sheets below you, and you feel the fabric start to dampen with your saliva.

Your tears had dried up in the process of everything, but when you feel the fingers he has splayed out, stretching across your ass to your hip, you feel fresh ones welling up ready to help your drooling mouth in soaking the bed.

The first brush of his fingers feels like an accident. The quick sharp sting makes you gasp and twitch in the opposite direction of his touch. But the next time you have no choice but to acknowledge what he’s doing.

His middle finger lays on the raw little irregular circle, testing how tender it is and the way that touching it makes you react. The way you jump, the sad little cry you left out, and mostly the way you clench down hard around his rapidly moving length has him biting harshly down on his tongue.

It’s perfect, he thinks. His own little button to get you to react the way he always wants you to. In pathetic, sniveling, and lustful pain.

After a touch comes another, and another. Both brief and teasing, until he finally lets his middle and ring finger both press into the burn and the surrounding tender flesh, holding down hard with a flex to the muscles in his fingers and palm until you’re screaming out with tears rolling down your cute swollen cheeks.

He finds another function of the button he’s created in your skin not long after. Your body shivers almost violently as your legs collapse and you lay limp and flat on your stomach. Your thighs close tightly together, but not tight enough to stop him from continuously drilling into you as you come around him, your hips moving in a way that lets him know you’ve found a way to get friction on your neglected clit.

He uses the spent position your body lies in to angle himself more down, letting his hips bounce off your skin and his hands push harder into your body. And all that you let out is a long overwhelmed whine that gets broken up by his thrusts.

You almost want to reach your hand back again to rip his hands away. Not as much from your neck, or from pushing his thumb in and out of you along with his thrusts, but from the way his fingers circle the small wound in a way so similarly to the way they circle your clit.

But you don’t. And you find yourself truly not wanting to. It hurts so badly, the pain almost blinding and making your chest heave with sobs, but it also sends shocks through your body in a way you’ve never felt before in your life and you feel yourself climbing a dangerous cliff towards another orgasm.

His lip is turning almost as raw as your burn and your throat, his teeth gnawing at it recklessly as the way your body sucks him in has his brain turning to liquid in his skull. He feels his lower belly tensing up and he knows he’s only moments away from coming alongside you.

It’s a race to the finish. His body is a much more active participant than your own, but he loves it that way. The way you turn limp, like your body is made of jelly fills his warming chest with pride, and the way you weakly rock your hips back while you quietly and incoherently beg for mercy is enough for him to know you're enjoying every second.

“Need you to come one last time,” he begs, sounding almost as desperate as you at this point as he leans closer to your ear, “c’mon show me how good you are and how much you love to be hurt.”

Your fist starts to wiggle down, almost as if it’s been reanimated and reminded that it has muscles and bones. You shove it tightly under your hips as they get shoved into the mattress by his, and once you get close enough that you can cover your aching clit with a few fingers, you let out a deep sigh of relief.

The hand he has twisted around your neck turns, flipping it over until it envelopes the front of your neck and presses against the sides. His grip is tight, immediately cutting off the blood flow to your head and making you feel dizzy. And it's this, plus the weak flicking you do against your clit, that sends you over the edge for the last time.

The garbled noises you let out are almost inhuman, only some hints of begging and pleading making its way through as your body tenses and relaxes over and over. The feeling of his fingers digging into the burn becomes less and less evident as the pleasure blinds you and has your eyes fluttering and rolling back.

Jeno hits his finish only a beat or two after. His stomach flexes as his belly button reaches for his spine and his shoulders curve in. He only gets a few more thrusts in, a few more digs into your burn and neck, before he collapses against you. His orgasm being left seated deeply in your body.

You’re not sure if you fall asleep or just blink for a minute too long, but the feeling of your boyfriend's sweat sliding against the raw skin of a burn has you cursing and twisting away. And as if the words fuck and dude ow awaken something deeply within him, Jeno sits up quickly enough that you also have to hiss at the sudden emptiness you feel.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you hear him mutter to himself as you hear the door to your bedroom open as he slips out. You don’t get to see which direction he turns down the hallways as you just let your worn body sink into the sheets that stick to your sweaty skin.

“I have absolutely no fucking clue how to treat a burn,” Jeno’s voice is panic stricken, but slurred still as the weed continues to fog his brain.

You turn your body enough to see him digging through a first aid kit that you were fully unaware that you owned, a quiet hhhrmm? coming out from the back of your throat as you sit in confusion.

He looks up from the acetaminophen and a gauze he has gripped in his hands, his face softening and losing its fear when he sees your tired blinking eyes and pouting lips.

He drops the things back in the small box he pulled them from, standing and moving over to sit on the edge of the bed, getting close enough that you can twist in a way that looks horrifying to him but he knows is somehow comfortable to you, until you rest your heavy head in his lap.

“So..” he starts petting at the creases between your brows and your thumping head, “you got what you wanted.”

“Mmhmm,” you simply purr in return.

“Mhm,” he parrots, his head nodding as he thinks, “so, any reviews for being turned into a human ashtray?”

“Jeno,” you start, peaking open one eye and letting your hand flit around dramatically, “it hurts so bad.”

He flinches, moving his hand to your hip and opening his mouth to babble in concern before you speak over him with a grin.

“But it feels so fucking good,” you sigh, like a girl in a teen movie fawning over her crush, “hurts so fucking good. And when you started pushing on it I thought I was going to pass out!”

“And that’s a good thing?”

“Yeah,” you scoff as if it’s the most obvious thing, before nuzzling into his hand as you think, “I do think it means I need to reevaluate a lot of things about myself as an individual.”

“Also in a good way?” He asks again, his voice now trailing off in a quiet laugh.

“Now that I don’t know about,” you huff, wondering if being a freak for pain is really as bad as it sounds, “eh that’s something I’ll think about after I take a bath.”

[call-me-double-trouble]

Double Trouble Sexual Orientation Headcanons

I don’t know what inspired me to make this post, I just wanted to share my thoughts and the general vibes of various sexuality headcanons about our favorite enby lizard. Keep in mind, these are just my opinions, and they’re not backed up by evidence. This is all in good fun.

Under a cut because this might get long

Yes, I know that Jacob Tobia referred to them as gay in a tweet, and the SPOP Wiki lists them as Achillean based on this, but I’d argue this doesn’t technically count as canon, since it was never established in the show itself (the only possible mention being them calling Sea Hawk “Hot Stuff”), so I think people’s headcanons and non-achillean ships are perfectly valid. That said, I’m not against the idea of them being gay, and I can definitely see it.

Gay/Achillean: This definitely holds up. DT is a theatre kid, after all, and we all know theatre kids are gay (joking). They have big twink energy, and of course, the classic “That’s your cue, Hot Stuff.” Some of my favorite DT ships are with men (Bow, Wrong Hordak, Peekablue, and Sea Hawk). However, I still think they have good chemistry with Catra, and I personally like the headcanon that they had a crush on her and may have felt bitter at being second-best to Adora, thus fueling a bit of the meaner parts of their betrayal. I still imagine them with a preference for men, but I don’t think women are out of the running.

Lesbian/Sapphic: This one’s a lot less common. I’ve actually only seen one person headcanon this, though there may be a few more. They don’t quite give me lesbian vibes, but they do seem to have chemistry with Catra, and I like several ships involving DT with a woman (such as Catra, Adora, and Scorpia).

Bi/Pan/Omni/Poly: This is my personal headcanon and has been ever since I got to know the character. They just seem like the kind of person who has lots of affection to go around (whether this is romantic or sexual is up to you). I lean more towards bi or omni for them because, as I said, I feel like they have a preference for men, but I feel like they get crushes on women, too. Though, let’s be real, it’s more likely for people to crush on DT than the other way around. They KNOW they’re the hottest bitch on Etheria!

Aspec/Arospec: Another one of my personal favorites. Yes, I’m biased, since I’m ace, but COME ON, it’d be such a glorious defiance of expectations and stereotypes, and DT would live for the chaos they’d cause by oozing sexual energy and not being interested in doing a thing about it. They’d be this untouchable, irresistible them fatale and OWN IT. But I feel like they’d also be fun as an aroace because of their ability to read people. They’ve got it down to a science, and logically analyzing romance/sexual attraction in an attempt to understand it is SUCH an aroace mood. They also seem like the type who just wouldn’t be interested in dating, and as I said, it’d be great if this gorgeous, smooth-talking, flirtatious lizard in a skin-tight outfit wasn’t interested in sex. What a power move! Of course, you could also see them as ace and alloromantic, gray ace, demi, allosexual aro, etc. I like the idea of aroace DT as much as ace DT who DOES date. As for their intimate life, maybe they do, maybe they don’t, maybe they do and just don’t care much about it one way or the other, maybe they do only under specific circumstances—there’s a whole variety of ways an aspec and/or arospec DT can be written, and I think it’s one of the most interesting interpretations of this character!

Polyamorous: I mean. Obviously. DT is so easy to ship, so you might as well make them date everyone XD. But seriously, I love this headcanon and think it fits them very well, and it’s one that I include in daydreams and the few fanfic things I’ve written.

[peacerisendove]

EPISODE 58

HERE’S A PLAY BY PLAY OF ME READING THIS EPISODE.

Me: “Oh, okay so they DID have sex.“

Me:

-SCREECHES AT BIG ETHEL ENERGY-

I FUCKING KNEW HOW DARE THEY

I KNEW HE WAS ASEXUAL/AROMANTIC!!!! HOW DARE THEY STRING US ALONG THIS STUPID NOT-MYSTERY FOR 58 EPISODES. YOU COULD HAVE DONE THIS SO MUCH BETTER!!!  -AAAAAAAAHHHHHH-

WE FUCKING BEEN KNEW!!!!!!

GOD. I LOVE ACE/ARO JUGGIE, BUT THIS TONE THAT EVERYTHING IS ABSOLUTE OKAY AFTER 58 EPISODES (AND WHO KNOWS HOW MANY YEARS IN THE STORY).

Re: The Trula being an exception shit - I’m willing to look past with skepticism because being ace/aro is not something that fits into a fixed set of parameters. Sexuality is fluid and how you experience differs between people. If Jughead is our only ace/aro (maybe demi?) then his representation of asexuality/aromanticism feels kinda iffy if you’re depict him as having an exception. It feels like his character is playing into the very thing you say he’s unhappy with. You’re displaying him and his sexuality as having “found the right person,” which (I’m only asexual so I can’t definitely speak for the aromantic experience) feels so incredibly insulting.

Though they also don’t explicitly state he’s asexual or aromantic which sucks. Do better Big Ethel Energy. Why are you afraid to say it???

BUT GOD YOU’RE JUST SWEEPING IT UNDER THE RUG NOW IT’S DONE LIKE ALL YOUR OTHER PLOT POINTS!!! (Ex: DILTON BEING THE INTERNET TROLL/BULLY (They treated you so bad Dilton, my boy. Honey you did not deserve that), VERONICA’S CHEATING!) YOU’RE SWEEPING UNDER THE RUG.

I am glad there is communication and that they handled it so maturely. But they both spent YEARS feeling a certain way. If I was Ethel and saddled with the emotional baggage due to someone’s treatment of me I would not be over it so fast.

I genuinely appreciate these panels.

But it also feels so wipe-my-hands over and done with. I’m also still a bit bitter that asexuality and aromanticism was a ~mystery~ plot point and was the REASONING WHY JUGHEAD WAS ACTING SO COLD THIS ENTIRE TIME. If you’ve been following along with my read along/rants you know that I think that using his sexuality as the reasoning for his behavior feels reductive. Though, I guess with how Jughead states that he deals with people telling him, “You just haven’t met the right person,” when it comes to romance I understand that he would act irritated by it all or cold to justify his behavior, but I also can’t since he’s been portrayed as acting cold toward the people who only show him romantic interest not those who are dismissing his feelings.

Yeah, no, I’m going back to my original opinion that how they handled this could have been a lot better. They made him cold and crotchety because of his sexuality. That’s not good.

This plot point could been handled so much sooner.

...And honestly does Jughead’s dislike of Ethel actually make any sense? Guy’s my brain is bouncing about as I think about this. They had sex, he found out he wasn’t interested in anyone sexually or romantically, and then he proceeds to avoid her and get pissy at her when she returns home? No, his initial dislike of her makes no sense. Even if you spin it as she reminds him of that time/he has some sort of lingering frustration toward the event of them having sex. It just doesn’t fit right. Emotions can be irrational/misdirected, but I don’t think that’s what’s happening here. And if that was the intention it’s portrayal has missed the mark.

I feel that the writer PLAYED this UP for the tension. His initial reaction toward Ethel in this series makes no sense.

ALSO TRULA FUCKING KNEW???? I’m glad she didn’t say anything cause he wasn’t out, but she also didn’t fucking help with stringing this along. Like I know keeping your nose out of things isn’t good for plot progression, but I’m just ‘Hmmm“-ing how Trula handled it. She can absolutely be a flawed character/ unreliable narrator. NO one has to be perfect in this comic, but I don’t know something with how Trula’s information was handled or presented doesn’t sit right with me.

Alright, so yeah. That’s it for me reacting to this episode. Jughead and how they treated his character was my emphasis for reading this long, so now I wonder what I’ll latch onto next. Maybe if there’s more info or mystery about Ms. Grundy (making her a lesbian was a phenomenal idea 10/10), but I don’t think so? We got answers there, but it also didn’t feel like a finish plot line.

This webcomic feels like a jumble. Anyway that’s it for my ranting this episode.

My personal highlight of the episode: Jughead has an undercut/shaved sides which I like aesthetically.

If you want some straight up good representation of asexuality and aromanticism please check out Jughead 2015.

Also here’s a collection of screenshots of Juggie being ace and aro from the comic if you want to take a look and see what the comic is like. I can’t recommend another comic more highly than Jughead 2015.

[a-romantic--aromantic]

On hanahaki..

as an aro who both reads hanahaki and enjoys it, and also experiences romantic attraction, i feel like hanahaki is often times…. not discussed in aro circles the same way it traditionally exists in fiction circles

hanahaki, in nearly every representation, is a physical manifestation of a crush. it is intentionally used as a metaphor for the feelings that you can get with romantic attraction:

choking on your words, feeling out of breath/like its hard to breathe, something in your stomach, how you can love people so much it hurts (even when it is reciprocated or you genuinely dont want it to be reciprocated). it sometimes sucks a lot and it hurts and it makes your chest tight and it can ache in a way i only see in angst, which is why hanahaki exists. its a form of catharsis for people who experience love like that.

i also think that a lot of the time i see aros talking about how the tragedy is that its unrequited but as far as ive seen, the point has been the refusal to communicate. the fact that the individual perceives it as unrequited so they start pulling away and isolating and that the only thing they need to do to cure it is *confess* but they are unwilling to because for some reason, unrequited or not, they think confessing will mess up the relationship they have with that person. usually the angst comes from “i love you and i think you do not feel the same but i want to keep you in my life exactly as we are so i will say nothing” instead of openly communicating that desire to keep the person in their life, platonic or otherwise.

i almost never see the “if you do not love me back i will die” thing, except if that is being used as the cause of a refusal to communicate- and i nearly always see communication being the cure. i know a lot of folks dont like love confessions if they are aro, but i dont see fault in honesty, as long as it doesnt come with expectations.

and im not saying its not amatonormative, but ive seen it done well, and its just supposed to provide catharsis for an experience you might not have, and thats okay. the point of this post is that i have never seen the presentation of the concept of hanahaki everyone is talking about. ive never seen what you are seeing- and i am actively seeking out hanahaki content regularly.

i just figured id put in my piece, because i have always been confused by the aro treatment of this trope, because i have never seen whats being said represented. I’m sure it exists or used to be more prevalent, but I dont see that ever now. maybe im just better at searching, but i wanted to talk about it.