#also in my heart i always thought he was a scorpio before the world decided to crush me

[causenessus]

just so u guys know i haven't been this attached to someone (suna) since oikawa tooru which started like 4 years ago i kid u not

[ge-nde-rr-env-y]

i played owen carvour in a production of spies in sydney, and tcb i have a confession i added a line. in the man behind the curtain reveal, owen says "if it hadn't been for my spot on aim and interest in foreign policy, i might have been an actor." i had about a month between application and audition and i was sitting on the first paragraph for so long and i got a bit bored. so i added "and you know, being blackmailed by the english" to that list. it added this manic, pained spark to the moment. fuel for the fire.

i dont know what joey thinks about owens history, but i gave him a timeline. born 1926 (nov 14th. scorpio bitch.), his fine family home destroyed in the Blitz, he enlists for some income (and maybe to escape home) at 17 in 1943, too young, but he's slick and clever enough to pass as an adult. 1945, right before the end of the war, he sees something he shouldnt have. the higher ups in a below the table deal that could ruin a lot of rich and powerful peoples lives if it reaches the wrong hands. owen carvours hands were the wrong hands. but he's a remarkable soldier, he's quick, he's a master tactician, and he's Good At Lying. hes useful. so instead of taking him out. someone says "hey kid. howd you like to be a secret agent. -also if you say no you'll die-" no choice. he'll continue to live at the behest of a governments will.

he doesnt Like being a spy, but its not the worst thing in the world. he likes the more decadent aspects, certainly, and deception not only comes naturally, but brings a sort of thrill.

he doesn't like being a spy until he meets curt mega. this part of his history is a bit blurry, but i imagine them meeting sometime near 1952 (because of the song Video Killed The Radio Star), surely on the job somewhere. curt makes spying fun. and curt is the first real thing owen has had reliably since 1943. he doesnt change, hes delightfully predictable, and despite him appearing somewhat less intelligent than owen, he has this knack for seeing straight through to owens heart. curt is daring, where owen might be intially more cautious. curt has the guts to get the two of them *into* situations, where owen has the tactician skill to get them *out*.

i think owen got comfortable. tragically, the two of them were so in sync, so reliant on each other, that he didnt see the fall coming at all.

it wasnt the fall that hurt. it was watching curt walk away. he'd always thought that if this were to happen, theyd go down together.

CHIMERA found him in the rubble, a boy who'd always been controlled, who'd never really got a chance to live a life of his own, and saw a man who was easy both to manipulate, and to empower.

they weren't aggressive about their agenda because they knew what would happen. the founder/ceo (a man i have decided is named Thomas) simply let owen recover in their facilities and let him free when he was able to leave, with an explanation of their plan, and an offer of further help should he require it.

owen broke within a month. a string of killings across europe simply attributed to an individual named The Deadliest Man Alive. CHIMERA drags owen back by the scruff of his neck.

"what the hell do you think you're doing."

"what? who are they going to arrest? owen carvours fucking dead."

its very important to me that owen wasnt brainwashed by CHIMERA. every choice has to come from him because the catharsis of him fully believing in the ideology he carries out with his chest for the first time is just delicious.

he doesnt. hate curt. i dont think. he loves curt, and he hates the institution of Espionage that forced them into this. but ultimately, that institution is so driven into curt that owen cant get what he really wants, which is to break curt out of that and have him all to himself. coldest goodbye reprise is a moment of sorrowful acceptance for both of them. owen understands that curt is always going to be a spy, no matter what, and giving up on the fantasy he had.

[midorishinji]

Disappearing act - chapter XI

Geto observed her more carefully, trying to decide whether she was being serious or not. — Killing non-sorcerers? — It's an option, but I don't take it seriously. Do you? — Yuki pressed him with a loaded question. Suguru Geto thought of them all — Shoko, Nanami, Haibara, Riko, Kuroi, his parents, Satoru — and his chest filled with an unbearable pain, but also an incredibly monumental love, so much that it felt like it would stretch and burst at the seams of his heart that could not contain it. He thought of his father again, reading him "Night on the Galactic Railroad" when he was young, and he thought of Satoru reading his own copy now during his leisure nights. He thought of Giovanni and Campanella, and of the Scorpio of the night sky, and of the nobility of sacrifice, of setting yourself on fire to warm the world.

Satosugu ｜Finalized｜Long fic｜Also being published in Portuguese and on AO3

Chapters: I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII - VIII - IX - X - XI - XII - XIII - XIV - XV - XVI - XVII

Chapter XI: good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience, this is the ideal life

Shoko was examining Mimiko and Nanako Hasaba, the two children rescued by Geto. Normal reflexes, good vision, and motor coordination as expected for children of that age — all this also taking into consideration the state of starvation in which they were before being brought to Tokyo. They would probably make a full recovery, was her verdict.

Taking two lollipops from a glass jar, Ieiri handed one to each of the girls, as a reward for good behavior during the exam. Both kids accompanied those present in the infirmary — Shoko, Suguru, Satoru, and Professor Yaga — with attentive and curious eyes, although still suspicious.

— So they're okay, right? — Suguru asked, just to be sure.

Shoko took a lollipop out of the jar for herself; maybe the reward wasn't always for the patients, the three men imagined, seeing that the container was half empty, and she could open the plastic packaging with a single pull using her teeth. — Yeah. They’re still a little weak because they’ve spent days without eating or drinking water, but other than that, nothing unusual. — she explained, turning to the girls — Before that, how did you get food? Did any adults take care of you?

Nanako, the more extroverted of the two, responded. — Our teacher secretly brought us food.

Someone in the village, at least, didn't agree to pretend that two children who could barely take care of themselves didn't exist, Suguru thought. A chill made him shiver as he remembered that he had come within a hair's breadth of eliminating all the villagers, including the poor teacher who did what little she could for the girls.

Satoru played with a stethoscope, trying to listen to his own heartbeat. Professor Yaga, annoyed with his usual antics, took the equipment from his hands, ruining his fun. This made Nanako giggle, finding all those weird grown-ups very funny.

— Well, the social worker must be waiting for my call. — the professor said, using this as a cue to leave.

— Where are we going now? — Mimiko asked Geto, her eyes worried.

He smiled kindly. — We're going to get you a house, here in Tokyo. The social worker will help with this, she is a person who helps children.

— But I don't wanna leave...

That request could break anyone's heart. Not even Satoru, who always took everything as a joke, could avoid feeling the weight of the situation: — It's for a short time, just for a few days... We'll pick you up later, right, Suguru? Megumi will like having more sisters, you guys are the same age, you’ll get along well. And Tsumiki-chan is older, but she's a responsible kid...

Geto wanted to tell him not to promise what he couldn't deliver, but he quickly realized he really was serious. And the mention of other children was enough to awaken a feeling of joy, curiosity and belonging among the girls: — Who is Megumi? — Nanako asked.

Satoru thought for a moment, a confused expression on his face. — He's... Well, technically, I guess I'm his stepdad. But that doesn’t seem right, huh.

— Dad... But you're the same age as uncle Geto, aren't you? How can you be someone's dad? — Mimiko said, with the frankness that only a child could have.

Shoko and Suguru laughed, and even Satoru couldn't help but smile at such an honest question. — Hey…! He is my adopted son, kinda. I knew his father, and Megumi and Tsumiki needed a home, so I adopted them. In fact, I think the two of them are more like my younger siblings than anything else, especially because they don't respect me... — Gojo explained. Tsumiki found him amusing, and Megumi found him cringe-inducing, and neither of them took him seriously considering Satoru was about the same level of maturity as them.

— Don't worry, Mimiko-chan, we also wonder how he can be someone's dad or stepdad or whatever when he has like, zero common sense. — Ieiri replied, with a sarcastic smile, while casually biting onto the lollipop.

This didn't shake Satoru's confidence. — I don't need to have common sense, Suguru already has common sense for both of us. — he said, in a dramatic pose.

Someone knocked on the door, announcing his entry: it was Professor Yaga, and from the expression he had on his face, the three sorcerers understood what he wanted. Geto looked at the twins, and at Masamichi, and left with both of them through the door, following the teacher. The social worker had arrived… The silence that followed inside and outside the medical room was deafening.

Satoru threw himself into a chair, the smile that had previously been on his face instantly dissipating. — I hope we can get custody of both of them. Suguru will never forgive me if I don't succeed, so I can't fail.

— You know it's not like that... — Shoko tried to cheer him up — He never really gets mad at you, even when you do everything you can to test his patience.

— But it's different, Shoko. I promised him, so I can't fail. If it comes to that, I’ll bribe the entire child protective services department, the government, I don't know. — Gojo explained.

Ieiri offered him a lollipop as a consolation prize. — You'll get custody, I know, don’t worry about it. Besides, you were so happy when you got here after lunch, don't let that fear ruin your joy.

— We went out for lunch, we went to eat instant ramen at the convenience store. And now that we're suspended for a month, it means we can spend a lot of time together, just like in the old times! — Satoru's radiant smile revealed how he felt at the mere memory of the facts. It was indisputable, and perhaps only he (and Geto) didn't realize the obvious.

— And you're this happy just because you ate instant noodles? — Shoko asked, trying to get him to hand over the details.

This only spurred him to spill the beans. — No, it's just... Suguru was arguing with me to eat better, and he said he cares about me, Shoko! How do you want me not to be happy?

Ieiri made a disgusted face. — I tell you all the time to stop eating like a raccoon and you don't care, but when it's Suguru you’re fawning all over...

— It’s different.

— Of course it's different, you're in love with him.

Satoru made a mocking face. — Of course not, that’s bullshit, Shoko…!

— Bullshit? Haven't we already had this conversation like five times before, Satoru?

— I'm not in love with Suguru, of course not, it's just… What we have is different. We understand each other like no one else, you know, and I would trust him with my life, in a way that I wouldn't trust anyone else. When we go out to do anything, it's always better when he's there, and when he isn't, I think about how much better it would be if he was there with me, and when I go to sleep, I think about him, and I always sleep better when we're together, and I feel like an idiot for smiling when he says these things to me, like when he says he cares about me, or when he promises he'll always be with me, you know? And at least three times a day I need to concentrate on not saying all of this to him accidentally, because I don't know... — pausing to take a breath, Satoru fell silent for a moment, and suddenly panic was written all over his face. — Oh my God, Shoko…! I think I really am in love with Suguru!

The unsurprising revelation did not spur any dramatic reaction from Shoko. — I know, that's what I've been trying to tell you for a long time... You should tell him all this, and not me.

Satoru jumped up from his chair, pacing nervously from one side of the infirmary to the other. — Tell him…?! I can't, I... What if he doesn't feel the same? What if I screw up it all up?

For those who knew both sides of the situation, someone who could judge it as an outsider, it was quite obvious that Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto were in love with each other and were simply too obtuse to realize it. All this doubt and torment could easily be resolved with a few words, and yet this tug-of-war of secret emotions remained. Three words that could bring relief and end that painful tango, three words that insisted on being silenced and swallowed time after time.

— Satoru, just pay attention to what you’re saying. Do you really think Suguru doesn't...? Oh, you know what, you two are impossible, I give up! — Shoko replied, raising her arms high in a gesture of surrender and frustration.

[what-if-rpg]

Welcome to the family, LAINE! Your application to COLTON CLARINGTON (FC: Austin Butler) was accepted. We’re really happy to have you around! Make sure to read the beginners checklist, and remember, have fun! We can’t wait to roleplay with you! Have fun!

IN CHARACTER

CHARACTER NAME: Colton "Colt" Grey Clarington CHARACTER AGE & DATE OF BIRTH: 29 & October 15, 1995 OCCUPATION: restauranteur/owner/food blogger FACE CLAIM: Austin Butler HOMETOWN & CITY WHERE LIVES NOW: fort bragg, nc & los angeles, ca SEXUAL ORIENTATION & GENDER: bisexual & cis man RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single POSITIVE TRAITS: determined, hardworking, & kind NEGATIVE TRAITS: perfectionistic, aloof, & sarcastic CHARACTER QUOTE/LYRIC:"i'm a lost cause...baby don't waste your time on me; i'm so damaged beyond repair, life has shattered my hopes and my dreams."

HEADCANONS

Colton, who more frequently goes by the nickname Colt, is into astrololgy. He is a Scorpio, and he fully believes in the personality he inherited from his Sun sign. He is very passionate, loyal, and intense, going full-throttle and head-first into any and everything he decides to set his mind to. However, he can also be stubborn- very. His perfectionistic tendencies often lead to very little patience. Though he is kind, he is not one to be crossed.

Unlike his father, Colt diverted from the political and military lifestyle. From a young age he had a passion for cooking, one that was only built upon as he grew. After graduating high school at the age of 16, two years early, he was sent to live in Paris for a year, to train under the best chefs the city had to offer. From there, he was accepted to Le Cordon Bleu, one of the best culinary schools in the world. Upon graduating at the age of 21, he used a bit of his trust fund money to open his first restaurant, L'Aube, located in LA, California. Now, 8 years later, L'Aube has locations in LA, NYC, Atlana, Las Vegas, and Miami. He has written two cookbooks, and is a popular food blogger and vlogger. 

Colt is an avid reader. He has a miniature library in his condo, and it is ever-growing. Despite his busy schedule, he sets aside time each day to read, for no less than an hour. On the weekends, he makes time to read for an hour and a half. Literacy is important to him, and he loves the ability to be transported through reading. 

Despite his success in other areas, Colton has been unlucky in love. At heart, he is a hopeless romantic. But, he has always had a difficult time picking partners. He is bisexual, and has been hurt more than once by ex's, both men and women. He has been in a couple of terrible relationships- his first and only boyfriend to date was a true narcissist, and his last girlfriend (really, his last partner) was essentially using him for his money and clout, while cheating on him with someone he thought was a good friend. The truth was revealed two weeks before Colt had been planning to propose. The relationship ended when he was 26, and he has been single ever since. 

CONNECTIONS

PARENTS: Julie & William Clarington- Colt has a complicated relationship with his parents. While he does love them and is grateful for them and all they've done and provided, he has trauma from the way he was raised. The staunchness, the strictness of the Clarington household, the expectations they were forced to meet...Colt grew up feeling as though he just wasn't ever good enough, and did go through a rebellious phase because of this. SIBLINGS/OTHER IMPORTANT FAMILY: Hunter Clarington- older brother: Colton has always loved and looked up to his older brother, always feeling as though he was the better child. He did his best to mimic Hunter in their younger years, though he worries they have grown apart a bit since adulthood. *i am open to other Clarington siblings, but would prefer Hunter be kept eldest if possible.  BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND: None Currently (but open) CLOSE FRIEND: Patrick East- best friend: Colt and Patrick met, oddly enough, at a wine tasting in LA. On a rare afternoon off, Colt decided to attend a wine tasting solo, and ended up being seated next to Patrick. The two hit it off quickly, and the rest is history. They've been friends for 7 years. OTHER: Devon Moore- friend/manager: Devon is the big-boss-manager of each L'Aube location, and delegates where Colt is too busy to. The two met in culinary school, and have been close for nearly 10 years.

[blossom-hwa]

Stardust - CHANGMIN

So like. This was the first full scenario I wrote for TBZ and I can’t believe I wrote this before actually even STARTING No Air, but whatever! It was cute! I couldn’t help myself but I didn’t want to post this before No Air so that’s why it’s late

Thank you to @deathbykpopboys for helping me put this scenario together! Honestly I don’t think I’d ever write anything without sunny hhhh she’s always so great with ideas <3

Pairing: Changmin x fem!reader

Genre: fluff, a little angst if you squint, teacher!au

Triggers: alcohol, cursing

Word Count: 2.7k

Changmin sometimes thinks you’re a little too perfect to exist.

TBZ Masterlist | No Air | Touching Stars | Breathe, and Live

Friday nights are always fun, for Changmin. Friday’s the last day of the work week and kind of blends into the weekend, and because he’s a schoolteacher, he (sort of) gets the weekend off. Sure, he might be making lesson plans or writing reports or doing other important, not fun things, but he also has his stolen moments for dance or shopping or things that he doesn’t have time to do during the week. He’s free, more or less.

The last Friday night of each month, though, Changmin enjoys the most, when he, Jacob, and Kevin meet up for cheap food and drinks. And as much as Changmin likes to wreak havoc on the lives of his fellow teachers (mostly by scaring the wits out of them with dolphin screams and horror movie masks), he really does enjoy their presence in his life and appreciates them for it.

They haven’t a missed a night so far, not since that time Jacob was out with the flu and Kevin had a family emergency. And even though Changmin’s definitely done and said some stupid (read: really embarrassing) things while under the influence, the pros of each night always end up outweighing the cons. So if Changmin wakes up the next morning with a hangover, well, that’s just a side effect of having some fun.

But sometimes he has thoughts. Thoughts that he’s repressed so well he might not even register them, but that exist nonetheless. And Changmin, sadly, is a truthful drunk. His thoughts come spilling out of his mouth, mostly unfiltered, whenever he’s had enough to drink.

And this week, Changmin has been having thoughts. Thoughts that he isn’t sure he wants to spill.

If he drinks, they’ll flood out. It’s the way Changmin works – he’s had enough experiences with alcohol and his brain that he knows what will happen. As he stares at the soju bottle on the table, he knows that if he drinks, he’ll probably regret it in the morning. Not necessarily because he’ll remember what he says – his memory tends to get a bit spotty even after a round of light drinking – but because Kevin definitely will.

Normally, Changmin would praise God for Kevin's ability to remember drunk things. Coupled with his inability to lie, it makes for so much potent blackmail. Sure, Kevin makes Changmin and Jacob swear not to talk about anything he said under the influence, but Changmin isn't an angel the way Jacob is. If it came down to it, he'd sell Kevin's secrets for a single corn chip and some entertainment.

(Okay, not really. But the point still stands.)

If he complained about this to people, they’d probably just laugh and say something about how Kevin is a precious pure meme, that he’d never sell out Changmin’s deepest thoughts for anything. After several years of working with him, though, Changmin knows better.

(He’ll just say that sometimes, Mr. Kev Kev isn't the happy-go-lucky meme-y little boy that everyone likes to make him out to be.)

So maybe Changmin shouldn't be drinking tonight. There isn’t necessarily a lot on his mind, but he’s been thinking of things that he doesn't want spilled just yet, and drinking will only make that possibility a reality.

Isn’t that what alcohol is for, though? To make those worries disappear, if only for a short while? The soju beckons at Changmin, even more so when Kevin actually opens the bottle. Eventually, he throws caution to the wind and fills his own glass.

It’s a clear night, mostly. A bit cloudy, but no sign of rain, and there’s a pleasant little breeze that feels cool against his cheeks. Sitting at one of the small tables outside of the restaurant, Changmin loses himself in the food and the conversation.

After an hour, Jacob decides he needs to leave because he’s supposed to meet with his family the next day and can’t get too plastered. Kevin calls him a noob while making a face, but Jacob, being the angel he is, just pats him on the head on his way out. Privately, Changmin thinks Kevin is much more of a noob than Jacob, but the alcohol hasn’t addled his mind enough to say that out loud just yet.

At some point, though, the world becomes pleasantly muddy. Changmin can register what’s going on at a distant level and he probably shouldn’t drink too much more, but he takes a last shot anyway, just as Kevin asks a slightly slurred “How’s life with Y/N?”

A stupid smile stretches across Changmin’s lips. “Kevin, oh my God, she’s perfect.” He grins, the breeze cool against his flushed cheeks. "She’s so beautiful, it doesn't make sense that we exist in the same world."

Kevin mutters something that sounds like "whipped" and "so soft."

Changmin is sure that if he were sober, he would've attacked his fellow teacher by now, but his tipsy haze is too pleasant to interrupt. He just wants to keep talking. "Kevin," he whines. "Pay attention."

"Okay." Face flushed, Kevin puts his chin on his fist. "'M listening."

"Y/N’s so beautiful." Dimly, Changmin is aware that he's just repeating himself, but he can't help it. The point needs emphasis. "Kevin, she’s so amazing. So much more amazing than me. So smart. Did you know Y/N knows like ten programming languages?"

Tipsily, Kevin shakes his head. "What... what's a program."

"Computer shit." Changmin plays idly with his shot glass. "Doesn't matter. So smart, so nice, so... lovely, Kevin. Y/N’s good at everything. She cuts fruit for me when I work late and make me go to sleep. She doesn’t know anything about dance and tries to help anyway. She works so hard and never takes anyone’s shit and she always knows when I need time alone or when I need comfort.” His mouth draws down into a slight frown. “She’s like... she’s like..."

Why is it so hard to come up with something to explain you? Your entire existence defies definition. How can he even find something comparable to the way you sparkle in his eyes?

Ignoring Kevin’s gaze trained on him, Changmin slumps over the table, eyes gazing out at the dark night. A few stars manage to glitter past the clouds and the piercing lights of the Seoul skyline.

Stars. Something tugs at the back of Changmin’s brain. Stars. Sparkly.

An image of your smile pops, unbidden, in his mind. Your bright eyes glimmer. Like stars.

Oh.

Stardust.

Yes, stardust.

You're like stardust, warm and gentle and... magical. Magical to the touch.

"She’s like." Changmin hiccups. "She’s like stardust, Kevin. Stardust. Perfect. Warm.”

A tear trickles down Kevin's cheek. Changmin has exactly two seconds to ready himself in his drunken haze before Kevin launches himself at his purple hoodie, loosely grasping at the soft cloth as he fully encases Changmin within his arms. "Ji Changmin," he sobs, muffled, "that is the most adorable thing I've ever heard you say."

Even sober, Changmin doesn't think he'd know what to say in response to that, so he just stays silent. It's not like Kevin would even hear him over the sound of his overemotional crying.

Anyway, Kevin's hug feels nice. Warm. Changmin doesn't think he needs to speak words at the moment, he's too comfortable. It's not the same as being in your arms, but he'll settle for it now. He burrows a little deeper into his friend's hold.

“You little child, you,” Kevin sobs into his shoulder. “You’re so sweet and small and warm, I can’t believe you exist.”

Changmin doesn’t feel like replying. There’s a bubble of something growing in his chest that he can’t entirely decipher right now, and his brain has focused on that. It’s some sort of emotion, he thinks. It doesn’t feel very pleasant.

His head gets pulled out of Kevin’s arms. He whines a little, annoyed by the lack of warmth, but he doesn’t really have the presence of mind to do anything but sit there limply as Kevin starts shaking him back and forth, still wailing about how “adorable his little Ji Changminnie is.”

The bubble keeps growing as Kevin keeps shaking him. It doesn’t feel like vomit – Changmin knows that sensation a bit too well – but it makes him feel a little sick. A little upset. The bubble feels suffocating, cold, but it also burns.

Not vomit. He doesn’t feel nauseous. But still unpleasant.

Kevin goes back to hugging Changmin into his chest, which soothes the bubble a little bit. The soft warmth of Kevin’s sweater smooths the burning and takes away the edge of the cold. But the bubble still stays as Changmin rocks back and forth in his friend’s hold, blankly trying to decipher the stupid emotion growing in his heart.

“There’s a bubble.” The words slip out of his mouth just past Kevin’s ear. “There’s a bubble in my chest.”

“Bubble?” Kevin pulls back slightly, flushed face confused. “What bubble?”

Changmin vaguely gestures at his chest as best he can with Kevin’s arms partially trapping his hands. “Here. Doesn’t feel good.”

Kevin’s eyes squint. “Need to vomit?”

“Nooooo,” Changmin whines. “Kevin, it’s a bubble.” He pauses. “Think it’s an emotion.”

He hears Kevin suck in a breath. “I can’t believe my precious little Scorpio child is finally feeling emotions,” the older boy says in a stage whisper, loud enough for at least the next two tables to hear. Changmin has enough presence of mind to slap him. “Hey!”

“It hurts.” Changmin’s lips pout deeper. “I don’t like it.”

“Aww, no, baby.” Kevin pats his head – a little too hard, but Changmin can deal with that. “Why does it hurt? What emotion is it?”

Changmin racks his brains for the word. It’s not a good feeling, so he tries to eliminate the good words as they pass through his mind. Not pleasant. Definitely not happy. Not calm, either.

Sadness? Maybe that’s part of it, but it’s not specific enough. Anger? Not really.

Fear?

Changmin isn’t scared of many things. He loves horror movies and thinks possessed dolls are cute, and it’s hard for anyone to really startle him. Fear is not an emotion that regularly appears in his repertoire.

But this time…

“I’m scared.” The two words slip out of his mouth, quiet, lonely. “’M scared, Kevin.”

Kevin pulls back again. “Changmin, you’re never scared.”

“I am now.” He purses his lips petulantly.

“Why?”

Unconsciously, the corners of his lips turn down even further into a blank pout. "Sometimes I think Y/N’s gonna leave. Slip through my fingers."

Even tipsy, Changmin can tell there are more tears welling up in Kevin's eyes. "But… you love each other?"

"Y/N’s stardust." Changmin's pout deepens. "Too perfect. She’s gonna realize that, that I'm not... I'm not good enough but she’s too nice to say that so she’ll just slip away." He hiccups again, feeling his cheeks burn with drink, fluttering his fingers loosely to make sure Kevin gets the point. "Like stardust."

Kevin remains silent for one, two, three seconds. Changmin takes that time to drain the last little bit of soju left in his cup.

Then Kevin nearly knocks the cup out of his hand when he literally grabs Changmin and forces him to curl up into his sweater, nose buried in the soft folds of cloth. “You beautiful, pure little child, you,” he coos, patting Changmin’s head (still a little too hard, but Changmin really doesn’t feel the need to deal with it right now). “You small little child. You poor, small child. Y/N is so in love with you, there’s no way she’ll ever leave.”

“Stardust,” Changmin reminds Kevin, words muffled into his sweater.

“Stardust,” Kevin agrees. “But good stardust. Gonna stay with you. Never going to leave.”

Changmin doesn’t remember much of what happens after that. He knows that they eventually pay for everything and Kevin’s partner picks them up (well, they were the one who was supposed to pick the two of them up. He doesn’t actually register the driver’s face, but Changmin hears Kevin calling them “love muffin, better than Beyonce,” so it’s probably them. He refuses to acknowledge any alternatives), but he’s too drunk and too tired to process anything else.

Somehow, he wakes up the next day curled up in his bed, forehead threatening to split from the dull pain. Mentally, he thanks himself for closing the shades before he passed out last night (or was it morning? He isn’t completely sure when he got home) so that the sunlight isn’t adding to his headache.

Get up, Changmin, he tells himself, summoning the strength to swing his legs out of bed. Step by step, he exits his room and slowly brushes his teeth before heading toward the kitchen for a bottle of water or something to get rid of the pounding in his head.

Changmin’s so out of it that he doesn’t register the smell of something cooking wafting out of the kitchen before he’s almost in it. He finally stops, confused, just in time to see your head poke out from the kitchen entrance.

For a second, Changmin just stares at you, brain buffering as he tries to come up with a suitable greeting in his hungover state. There’s this look on your face that Changmin’s muddled mind can’t seem to decipher.

Oh, God.

You look like you’re about to cry. 

He panics. What did he do wrong? Did he say something bad last night? He can’t remember anything – how badly did he screw up, what the hell did he do –

Then you leap at him, much the same way Kevin did last night, and bury your face into his shoulder.

“Ji Changmin,” you say, words muffled into his rumpled shirt, “I love you so much.”

Changmin’s mouth can only come up with a confused “huh?”

You pull back, eyes shining with tears, but mouth stretched into a beautiful, beautiful smile. “Don’t tell me you don’t remember what you told Kevin last night,” you say teasingly, though there’s a hint of uncertainty in your gaze.

Slowly, slowly, the events of last night begin to piece themselves together in Changmin’s brain. Every single stupid word he said to Kevin in his drunken stupor comes flooding back in one massive, jumbled mess.

He blushes.

“Ji Changmin.” You cup his puffy, red cheeks between your hands, voice trembling. “Listen to me. I’m not leaving. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to slip through your fingers and, fucking, I don’t know, fly away. Because I am not perfect, I am not stardust, but god, I – you’re perfect for me. You are good enough for me, more than good enough for me. You are perfect, and I’m staying here forever. You’re not going to be able to get rid of me. Understood?”

“But –”

“Understood?”

Changmin stares into your shining eyes. Even with you standing right here, hands cradling his face with the gentlest touch, he can’t quite believe you’re real and not just some beautiful figment of his imagination. Slowly, slowly, one of his hands rises to touch the fingers resting against his cheek. Just to make sure this isn’t a dream.

Solid. Warm.

Not a dream. 

This is real.

He nods dumbly, a stupid smile spreading across his face. “Okay.”

You crush him close again and this time, Changmin’s arms automatically move to wrap around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest. He can feel a few tears soaking into the fabric of his shirt as you hold him tight, so tight, and he smiles, one hand coming up to pat your back.

You’re here. You’re here, alive, solid, real. He can feel your warmth against his body, feel your hair tickling his skin.

You may be ethereal. You may be something completely out of this world, beautiful, divine. You may be sparkling, glimmering, brilliant in the morning sunlight. You may be made of stardust, something too perfect (he’ll fight you on that) to exist on earth.

But now, with you wrapped warmly in his arms, Changmin realizes that even though you may be stardust, that doesn’t mean you’re going anywhere.

A tear slips out of his eye as he smiles.

If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3

(1 reblog = 1 cheek pinch for changmin idk why I just think that’d be fun <3)

[lyrebirdswrites]

not me drawing and interpreting proper astrological birth charts for the jjk main trio now that the official fan book finally gave us their birthplace in addition to their birthday 👀

Explanation under the cut! (edited to be more beginner friendly)

Quick disclaimer ig: this is just my personal interpretation of these placements. If you read the way I describe something and you think to yourself “hang on, I have this placement and this doesn’t sound like me at all” that would be because a) I am an amateur astrologer and I do this for fun, I don’t know everything about every sign/planet, and b) no placement exists in isolation - it’s influenced by the house it’s in as well as any other planets aspecting it - so it’s possible that the placement manifests in a less conventional/standard way due you because of such factors.

EDIT: my first draft of this post was not super beginner friendly so here’s a quick astrology 101 to help people understand wtf I’m talking about. Skip to the next photo if you don’t need a primer.

Everyone has ten main planets in their birth chart, each of those planets will fall under a different sign depending on when and where you were born. The planet governs an area of your personality, the sign shows what that area of your personality is like. Some quick definitions of the relevant planets for this post:

Sun: the one everyone thinks of when asked ‘what’s your star sign’. Your basic personality, your core, your ego.

Moon: symbolises emotion, intuition, your private internal world, and how feelings are expressed.

Mercury: symbolises communication, intellectual reasoning, and how you learn.

Venus: symbolises romance, aesthetics, how you socialize, and pleasure-seeking behaviours like shopping or sightseeing.

Mars: the source of your passion/drive/motivation. Symbolises where and how you expend your energy.

Retrograde: not a planet, just something the planets do sometimes. At some points in the year the planets look like they’re moving ‘backwards’ through the sky, and this alters their influence on the birth chart.

I think that’s probably enough but shoot me an ask if you’re curious/confused! I’m always happy to talk astrology (clearly lol)

Megumi... I always suspected he had scorpio influence somewhere in his chart and turns out I was right!! Not only scorpio venus but scorpio mars too?? I’m obsessed with this. Scorpio is a water sign (read: big on emotions), the embodiment of the phrase ‘still waters run deep’, and though scorpio placements are not always loud about their affection they tend to bond in a pretty intense way with their chosen people. Those venus and mars placements together really do speak of ride or die devotion - no wonder he’s Like That when it comes to Yuuji people he cares about.

His jupiter and saturn are both in retrograde; I would not have predicted it because I don’t think about natal retrograde all that much, but it actually makes a lot of sense imo. Retrograde jupiter usually indicates someone who is internally very philosophical in the sense that the person will define their own firm moral/ethical code instead of following a familial or societal belief system, which is pretty much megumi ‘I save people according to my own conscience’ fushiguro in a nutshell. While retrograde saturn is basically like. On the outside you’re stoic but on the inside you’re a worrywart, and you take responsibility Super Seriously but you also don’t like people with authority pushing you around needlessly. Which is also megumi in a nutshell lol.

His leo moon was a surprise but I honestly think it works for him because this is definitely where Unhinged Feral Megumi comes from: when he decides to go all out he gets such a flair for the dramatic. capricorn sun and capricorn mercury are pretty intuitive tbh, he really gives off capricorn vibes - practical, reserved, loyal, ambitious and tenacious, possessing a dry wit, capable of putting in steady hard work to get to where he wants to be.

I was already aware of Nobara’s leo sun because we’ve had their birth dates for a while now (birthplace is the new info which lets me draw the whole chart). But her cancer moon is such a lovely placement under that hard outer shell of hers. Nobara seems like she does not have a nurturing bone in her body, but it’s wrong to stereotype cancers as exclusively homebody motherly types - they have deep loyalty for their chosen family/home and they’ll go to the ends of the earth for those people in their own way whatever that may be... she really is a softie deep down 🥰 she really does care 🥰 thinkin about the end of her ch 125 flashback in this context

Nobara’s virgo mercury is actually kind of funny to me because while it indicates a natural gift for intellect and a talent for sorting out the fine details, it also has the potential to make someone a harsh critic who can nitpick and be quite blunt in stating their opinions... this is very Nobara, she does Not spare the feelings of anyone she is talking to lol.

Libra venus!! She has libra venus that’s so perfect!!! this placement is sophisticated and charming and always classy, these people adore that classic chocolates-and-roses romance but they turn love of all kinds into an art form. Traditionally the placement is also associated with people who care about beauty and harmony, who will go out of their way to look good for their companions. Also her leo mars... I love that. It’s really amplifying her bold outspoken flashy self-loving take-charge nature. Queen energy right here.

She has a bunch of natal retrogrades but the one I want to talk about is retrograde uranus... this one is Very fitting and again almost funny in the context of her character. You know how she’s always convinced she’s the only sane person in the room when actually she’s the unhinged one 24/7 and not self aware about that in the slightest? Yeah. That’s big retrograde uranus vibes.

Oh Yuuji... I could talk about your pisces sun all day 🥺 I could get Very technical and meta about the pisces association with the twelfth house and the fact that it’s ruled by neptune and what that says about his character, but I don’t have the room or the time so I’ll save that for another post. For now I’ll just say that the fact that he cares so deeply for others regardless of how well he knows them, the way he feels his feelings so intensely and is very intuituve/sensitive to others needs, him being interested in the occult before he ever found Sukuna’s fist finger, it all just seems more pisces to me than any other sign. And him having pisces mercury + pisces uranus in addition to his sun is also very sweet... our boy really thinks with his heart at all hours of the day doesn’t he?

His libra moon is such a fitting placement, too, because this moon is all about relationships - not just romance but bonds of all kinds, friends and family and companions of any sort. Yuuji as a character is so motivated by the bonds he shares with others and his desire to not be alone, especially on his deathbed. Libra moons are charming and personable and find it very easy to connect with others, they are deeply concerned with justice and will be accepting of everyone except for people who are cruel (exhibit a: just look how he responded to mahito). I think it’s a very apt moon for him to have.

Tbh if I were picking and choosing I might have loaded him up with yet more pisces energy and given him my favourite placement in the whole world, venus in pisces. But he actually has an aquarius venus and I think that’s so interesting! The part of this placement that speaks to his character for me is the way that aquarius venus love is defined by radical acceptance - there is never any judgement (I won’t judge you, Junpei!), because this venus seeks not only to see and understand but to be seen and understood in turn. Some say aquarius venus is an emotionally detached placement. I think that’s a mischaracterisation, but it is true that aquarius placements can be low key scared of intimacy and vulnerability even when they crave it lmao. An aquarius venus will sort through turmoil in their heart by retreating to think it over in isolation, rather than by submitting to the mortifying ordeal of being known and reaching out. Manga readers if u know u know

All I can say about his capricorn mars is that it definitely embodies that determined protagonist vibe. Thoughts like ‘I want to get stronger, I want to be the best, I’ll put in the work to come out on top’ are very capricorn thoughts to have, and the drive and forward momentum associated with mars really push them to the front of his character. But also, again; an underdeveloped capricorn mars under stress will shut out possibilities for connection with loved ones by dedicating themselves to their job or cause. Yuuji learn healthy coping mechanisms challenge 2k21.

[inthestars011]

What it’s like falling in love with him 💓💓🥺 *check venus*

Based mostly on personal experience

Aries Venus- falling in

love with him was like always remembering the feeling of his loose red tee shirt even if you just felt the cotton warmth as it grazed your arm lightly as you walked past in the hallway. He’d stare right through you and make your body go cold, or sometimes he’d lightly smirk and you’d feel the burning of a million suns as they rolled and rolled

into the pit of your stomach without mercy. Loving him was like constant tension, an endless dark corridor. Loving him was like heartbreak that you begged for. He would say he just didn’t want you, and leave, disappearing through the trees and wistful breeze. But he would come back forceful and angry everytime he heard that your arm may be wrapped around another man, he’d ask you where you are and he couldn’t handle the thought of your fingers intertwined into other hands. Loving him made you angry and loving him set you free. You realized that the two of you were just not meant to be.

Taurus Venus- Loving him was like forgetting what it once felt like to be touch starved. Some days he’d let his fingers dance lightly on your leg, other days, he’d kiss your neck as you moaned and begged. Either way you knew you were home, you knew you were safe. There’s nowhere you’d rather lay, than under the sun and in his arms. Both sensations brought warmth and love. You’d laugh as he seemed to make your parents fall in love with him even more than you, he was so scared to lose you. He would cook for you, feed you hot soup when you were sick. sometimes, you’d disagree on things and he’d be kind of a dick. You will miss the golden summers in his eyes, the loyalty in his fingertips. You will miss the sun as it rested in the peaceful sky, the sweet honey in which you’d dip your feet in gently.

Gemini Venus- Falling in love with him was like laughing about the crude joke he made whilst being entranced with his sly smile as he wrapped his mouth around a beer bottle. You wanted him to savour you in his mouth and drink you like he did that Miller lite. He loved to make memories with you, even if memories is all that they are. A faint recall of true love, a remembrance of his smile. Butterfly’s are beautiful but are almost always gone by Sunday morning, he always brought a rude awakening without realizing. You will remember the fresh grass as it tickled your backs and not the sound of your heart as it cracked, you will remember staring at the stars and wanting to bathe in galaxies above, and while you looked up at those stars all he did was stare at you, and you’ll remember how the staring was slightly intrusive but nonetheless mischievous, innocent and cute. He was in awe. You will remember the nervous smiles, the cold bathroom tiles, the time worthwhile. You won’t remember your heart breaking.

Cancer Venus - Falling for him was like finally being cared for. You were an abandoned child left on a door step and he took you in and cradled you tight, he loved you even as you tried to fight, he loved you even when it didn’t feel quite right, he loved you through your darkness, through your stressful nights. As soon as his soft little heart decided you were family, he’d never ever leave your side and you’ll feel his wrath if you dare try. You were sick and broken and he held you, god, he was the only one who held you. He’d be moody and jealous and influence the entire mood of a room, he sometimes made you feel sad and wanting to find somewhere else to hide, crawl back up inside your mamas womb. He always made you comfortable, wrapped you up in a blanket full of love and he would show you there is warmth in not only the sun but also the moon and the stars. With him you didn’t feel unloved, no, love was always all around you and you didn’t have to search very far.

Leo Venus- A love with him was not a love that felt detached, no, you were the centre of his universe and that you were sure. He’d come home and tell you stories, some that made you laugh, some that made you cry. But they captivated you. God, he always captivated you. He was your gleaming star and you were his night, you were just perfect together, the shoe fit just right. He would get jealous, grabbing you and kissing you in front of everyone, you’d say “what the hell?” he’d chuckle and say “I wanted to claim what’s mine”. maybe that was too possessive and annoying or maybe you began to fall in love with it just as you did with his touch that gleamed and burned. people said when they heard you both giggle, the sound resembled two lovers as they intertwined, people would let out an “aww” as you two danced goofily in the living room after a few too many glasses of wine. He gave your heart exotic life under party lights and he let you win everytime at beer pong just because he wanted to please you. It took him a while to really reveal but one day he glanced at you and said “I really need you”.

Virgo Venus- falling for him was like finally being important. He worshipped you in a way that was quiet and soft. He criticized himself he never felt he was enough. He was always on his knees calling you an goddess as you sipped your fresh mint tea. You laughed and you said “I’m nothing of the sorts” he grabbed your face and told you, “ you absolutely are”. He helped you learned to love yourself and taught you so many things you never knew, theres so many things about the world and you really had no clue. He’d fix his hair and never know where to put his hands and you’d laugh and put them on your body and softly say “if you’re not sure where to put your hands; this is where I think they’ll stay”. He‘d shake with a nervous tremble and giggled with excitement. He picked the lint of your sweater and ran his fingers through your hair, he had an angelic type beauty, skin pure and fair. He would get grumpy when he was tired and sometimes it felt like he didn’t care, but he always gave his heart to you, he was always willing to share.

Libra Venus- He loved with a heart that was open and naive, a heart recklessly worn upon his sweater sleeve. He was so kind and soft he was almost unreal to you, he had hair like golden waves and a smile soft and true, he was delicious like candy, a body that was like a meal to you. And he was always read to be devoured as long as he could devour you too. There was red wine, roses on the bed, and fancy dates just for you two, the romance completely swept you away and never failed to enthral you. He was the prince and you were the princess and you giggled because you never knew that in a couple years would be living out a cheesy Taylor swift song in real life but here you were. Kissing the boy of your dreams, drinking champagne, and making love on the satin sheets. “Here we are baby, it’s just you and me.” He softly whispered in your ear, there’s no other words you’d rather hear.

Scorpio Venus- He loved you because you had a deepness about you, you had a sad soul and it struck him the right way. He never fucked with chit chat, no, he had a soul that yearned for more. He was destructively emotional, a mind that was at constant war. He wanted to change but only when he was with you, he could finally see good parts of himself, that he’d never seen before as you kissed along his scars and broken heart. He hated how much he loved you. some days he’d disappear and you wouldn’t hear from him, other days he couldn’t keep his hands off of you as he caressed along your body and wiped away your tears. He’d punch the wall and you hugged your knees, you’d scream as he crawled on the floor and cried, feeling weak. He taught you that love is something to fear. Love isn’t always clear. True love isn’t always comfortable and you felt that as his presence grew near.

Sagittarius Venus- He had eyes, full of lust honesty and fire. Two broken souls looking to move on, Bonnie and Clyde, forever on the run. Who said romance couldn’t be fun? He’d grab your bum and kiss you quick, soon the flame would burn out of the candle wick. He left you crawling for more, ugly, needy on the bathroom floor. You still recall the 3 am calls when you two felt like riding into the night and seeing where the stars take you, you touched the sky with your fingers tip, and then touched eachother and found meaning in the universe. Love can be true even when it is fleeting, a quick and passionate love can be just as defeating. Before you know it, he’s on a train, and you’re wondering why he ever went away. He’ll explain that his gods told him to go where he feels free and he can rest his head because down there he is authentic and true, and that he loves you so, but that place isn’t with you.

Capricorn Venus- He wants the poster image girl, someone sensitive and sweet to balance out his cold exterior. You were the only one who could make him feel truly warm. Before he knew it, he was in love. Perhaps it happened with a little playful nudge or a giggle in the wind. You were perfect for him, a match made in heaven, he was the wish you had been waiting for, your 11:11. He’d be quiet about it but as soon as he felt comfortable he told you about his dreams of picket white fences, lawn parties and kids learning how to play baseball in the yard. He told you he saw your face, Ivory and soft, blurry and faint in every one of those dreams. He worked till his hands hurt and you’d massage them at home, he had a serious look, stern to the bone. You’d kiss him and add the perfect softness to his life, it wasn’t long till he asked you “will you be my wife?”

Aquarius Venus- He wouldn’t dare say the word love, and he covered his ears as soon as the thought struck your mind and the word touched your tongue. Because you were only his best friend, a best friend that wore his stylish blue sweaters and he said you made them look better. You were just a best friend he couldn’t stop thinking about, a best friend that had a mouth he loved to taste, a best friend that he’s seen in only her lace. And you’d say “that doesn’t seem like a best friend to me” but all he’d do is laugh and disagree. Hed say “who’s to say what’s love and what’s lust, what is and what isn’t meant to be.” It hurt you because sometimes he was cold and almost alien like, but he was electric to the touch, he was neon lights and an addicting drug, so this so called “best friend” wasn’t someone you would give up.

Pisces Venus- once you are in love you saw him turn automatically soft, suddenly his hands melted into icecream and you couldn’t help but be addicted to how it was so sweet. He would tell you reminders of his love everyday, it was way of begging you to stay. He would tell you how sometimes you remind him of the flowers in may, or this really heart wrenching song he heard the other day. You would feel special and loved, like you two were angels or specks of stardust continuously falling. His love for you pours out like a waterfall and all you want to do is lay underneath and choke on it and let it drown you in the most hauntingly beautiful way. He is your saviour, your soft reminder of sunny days. He is what you never knew you needed when you always felt defeated, he was a wonderful sparkling surprise, he was more of a god than simply a guy.

[lunaticsundae]

The Ghost of the Past

Pairing: Zyglavis x Scorpio

— Department of Punishment, October 1878 —

The King of Heaven sat on his throne with his usual smile, looking at the black haired teenager standing in front of him. Gently, he spoke:

“Poor child, you have lived a life full of tragedy. You deserve a chance to live a better life with the star i have given you in your eyes. From now on, your name is no longer a code or a number, your name is Scorpio, the future ruler of Scorpio and...”

The king stopped in mid-sentence, looking at the dark blue hair man who just arrived

“...and to prepare for your future position at a zodiac god and a member of the Department of Punishment, Zyglavis, ruler of Libra, vice-minister of the department will be the one who guide you.”

Zyglavis bow before the King and took a quick glance at Scorpio. He was a young teenager with dark silky black hair and pale skin, his grey eyes were mysteriously attractive with the Scorpio zodiac star glowing inside his pupils. This kid could have live a better life instead of taking his own life because his miserable situation pushed him into the dead end.

Guiding Scorpio back to the department, Zyglavis handed him the uniform.

“Wear this tomorrow for your first training, your power limit is yet unknown for now but we will explore your limit and your special ability gradually. I will be the one who guide you and remember, i will not be easy on you because you will be one of the zodiac gods in the future.”

Scorpio silently nodded his head, he is still new to heaven and got nobody else to trust, he just thought to go with anything now. When Zyglavis was stating the department’s rules to Scorpio, the door opened and a grey hair man walked in.

“Ooohh, so this is our new little member, welcome to the Punishment ! Don’t be to stiff on him Zyg he’s still a child, try to put a smile on your face when guiding him, just like me!”

“Ophion, please try to act like a minister a little more, you have a lot of pending punishments to do. You expect me to guide you like this kid as well?” - Zyglavis sighed, looking at the ruler of Ophiuchus, who is the current Minister of the Punishment.

Ophion smiled and held the black haired kid’s hand, suddenly a light glowed from Scorpio’s hand and a little star shard appeared.

“Considering this as your welcoming gift, kiddo. Whenever you feel afraid or have any negative feelings, just hold onto this shard, it will wash away your negativity. Because kid, you deserve to be the happiest person in the world” - Ophion smiled brightly while patting Scorpio on the head.

This is the first time Scorpio has been treated so kindly. The warm feeling he felt at that moment, this is the first time he felt it. Clutching the star shard in his hand, he bow down to Ophion, who he have decided to be loyal to, at least at this lifetime.

However, the peace of the department of punishment cannot maintained for long as one day, the Ophiuchus constellation was removed from the Zodiac, leaving only 12 remained, perfectly balanced, as how it should have been. Ophion was the last ruler of Ophiuchus as his star was ripped from his eyes, for his existence was an evidence of the heaven’s unbalance. Zyglavis could never forget the smile on his ex-minister’s face for he accepted his fate for the greater good of heaven.

He could also never forget the image of a black haired child he held in his hand who was crying with a crushed soul, holding the star shard of the Ophiuchus constellation in his hand, which was no longer shine anymore. He wanted to protect this child, at all cost. He will not allowed anything to break the ruler of Scorpio once more. No one knew if that was a way to fulfill the late Minister’s last wish or if that was the ruler of Libra’s own desire.

- Department of Punishment, February 2021 -

“Zyg, here is the documents of important punishments that needed to be executed and the annual report this year.”

“Thank you” - Zyglavis takes the document and looks at the ruler of Scorpio

“You look more like a vice-minister now, time gone by so fast, wasn’t it?” - Zyglavis smiled before he noticed the star shard hanging around Scorpio’s neck.

“You still keep that, after all these years?”

Scorpio faintly smiles, replying:

“We talked about this before Zyg, this is the only way for me to feel like he’s still here to look after us..”

“Even when it’s not even glowing because he’s not here anymore? Even when that’s just a piece of rock?” - Zyglavis asked, somehow he feels...uncomfortable. Yes, he admired and respected the late Minister of the Punishment but the fact that there was still a deep pain from the past stabbing into Scorpio’s heart, he can’t take it, seeing his Vice-minister clutching onto a hopeless hope.

“But no one knows if he can be back again...he can be out there, on Earth, living a new life maybe? I just have to find him.”

“Scorpio you nearly died using that ancient spell trying to find him, you could have turned into pure dust if i didn’t come in time.” - Zyglavis stands up in anger, looking straight into Scorpio’s eyes

“I will try to be stronger, there must be a way..”

“SCORPIO, HE’S GONE” - Zyglavis yelled, losing his temper. He sicks of seeing Scorpio hurt himself trying to bring the dead person back to life, he sicks of seeing his precious man crying himself to sleep every night with that shard in his hand. He sicks of it, he doesn’t want to see the one he appreciate so much suffer anymore.

“He’s gone, you cannot bring him back, the whole existence of the Ophiuchus was an unbalance factor that can’t affect the whole heaven, he dissappeared into the oblivion ! His soul is gone, Scorpio, he is not somewhere out there, stop finding him he’s..”

*SMACK*

Zyglavis’s eyes wide opened, somehow, it’s hurt, not physically, but his heart is aching, knowing that the one he loved so much never gonna forget the late Minister and this pain will continue to make the ruler of Scorpio suffer, even for millenia.

He looks at his vice-minister, who now has tears in his eyes, looking at him with anger and pain, shivering. Each of Zyglavis’s words send him into despair, push him to wander in the hopelessness he tried to avoid. Scorpio just wants the shard to shine again, he just want to feel happy again.

“My apologies, minister, for saying something that bothers you. If you excuse me.” - Scorpio bows down and quickly gets out the room. It was raining outside, rain the heaven, could be just another weather phenomenon or it is the heaven crying.

Zyglavis standing alone in his office. Ophion was the one he looked up to so much, the perfection he wanted to be. He now have everything Ophion used to possessed: power, status

“But i can’t never get that grey eyes to look at me, only me” - a faint smile appears on his face.

——

“Weird, heaven’s weather is rarely like this, it’s been raining for a while” - Huedhaut looks at the window while turning to the Minister of the Punishment.

“You know this is your fifth bottle right? What’s going on”

“Hue...do you ever regret saving her, Clotho? giving her a new life knowing she won’t remember you, do you feel the pain when she marry someone else who isn’t you?” - Zyglavis said, his voice gets raspy

Hue’s face soften, knowing exactly what and who he’s referring to and why he asked that

“I just want her to live, Zyglavis. If she ends up with me again, it is magically fated and i really appreciate it. But if she decided to love someone else, her happiness is my happiness also, she deserves a new life without having to suffer any pain from the past”

“But you and i are different, Zyglavis, your loved one is still here, standing next to you everyday, you shouldn’t hold back your feeling for that is something you might regret in the future”

Zyglavis silently walked out of the room, his eyes darkened, heading out to the rain. In the garden as he crosses, he found a familiar figure standing there, holding a glaze lily, the flower of memories, the flower of the past

The flower that Ophion loved so much

“I really can’t never surpass you” - Zyglavis looks up to the sky, he then approaches the black haired vice-minister, who was looking at the flower, no one knows if he’s crying or if it just the rain.

“I can’t never be him..” - Scorpio looks up as he see a tall figure looking down at him, the minister’s face filled with pain that can’t be described by words.

Shivering, he holds Scorpio’s hand

“I can’t never have you” - The tears start falling from the dark blue eyes, his hair and clothes soaking wet, he never look so pathetic before. But it’s okay, he doesn’t care about outside manner anymore. He only wants those grey eyes to look at him, a pathetic person, who can’t never surpass the ghost of the pass.

The soft feeling touch Scorpio’s lips. Zyglavis’s lips was cold and wet from the rain but somehow, things feel surprisingly warm. He doesn’t care anymore, he devours those lips that he has always wanted for a long time, hugging that person he always loved. Finally break free from the kiss, Scorpio try to breath, gasping for air, he looks at the man who is still holding him. The ruler of Libra’s eyes darkened with despair.

“I love you.”

“Zyg, i-“

“Scorpio, i love you, even when i’m not the one you want, even when you will never look at me the same way you looked at him, even when—“ - Zyglavis’s voice starts to crack

“—even when you don’t love me”

“I will always protect you, despite me all you want but that cannot change the fact that you’re the most important person to me. I will not allowed you to hurt yourself, if you want to find him, i will do it with you, even when it costs me my life but as long as you can be happy, it is worth it, because you deserve it, Scorpio.”

The glaze lily fell onto the wet ground, at that moment, the star shard necklace start to shine again, the first time in more than 100 years, it shines again.

Scorpio hugged the man before him, he felt something bloom again in his heart, like a hidden feeling bursting to life, a feeling that was pinned down at the depth of his heart for many years by the lingering ghost of the past.

—January 1877, Department of Punishment—

“Zyg, look at this star shard” - Ophion happily holding a little shard in front of his Vice-minister

“What, it’s not the first time you see it, that stuff is everywhere, stop hanging around and get back to work” - Zyglavis nagged

“Nah ah, this one is the Ophiuchus special edition, listen, this star shard will glow if it senses love growing inside of a person and especially, it will shine brightly when that person is near the one they love, pretty cool right.”

———

“Ah, i forgot that detail, that important detail” - Zyglavis smiles, looking at the glowing necklace of his loved one, the rain finally stops, revealing beautiful rainbow afterward.

—The end—

Ahhh i wish i could extend the length but i’m too lazy so pardon the crappy character development.

[dreamyaqua]

Helloooo~!! I'm the same person who talked about Hyunjae and Haknyeon's rising signs! When I first wrote it, I wasn't deep into astrology yet. I've researched and tried to learn more about the Greek gods, the mythology, planets and associations to better my understanding. So, this time, I present all 23 members of NCT. To form an opinion on this, I watched their personal variety on their YT channel, took note of their physical habits and appearance, and read first impression stories. (1)

Also, don't worry about answering this right away! I just got very excited and wanted to share this :DD we currently have 5 members with confirmed risings; Johnny, Taeyong, Kun, Doyoung and Jaehyun. That's 18 members left, still! Also, I relied much more on their first impressions of each other as well as their appearance, habits and their neutral face because idols put up an act, which is enforced by their company. I'm running out of words so– (2)

(I decided to put the rest under a cut as the ask has gotten really long and I also put your asks together in regards to each member, I hope that’s okay!^^)

First up, Taeil! My first guesses for him were Scorpio (ruled out immediately lol), Capricorn and Taurus. I went with Capricorn at the end. Taeil just has a home-y, fatherly aura which Earth signs have. According to the members, he has that strong vibe that makes you want to learn from him. And we know that Capricorn is ruled by law and structure loving planet, Saturn. Saturn is associated with Cronus and Hestia. (3) Hestia is peace and home while Cronus was briefly the ruler of all. So, in short, a parent. Taeil as NCT's grandpa is accepted by many czennies. Which fits well. A typical Capricorn rising could have a petite stature as well as a wide-ish body type. Earth risings do tend to be stocky. Lips are usually either thin and wide or round but when they smile it's bright and feels familiar. It all starts from home~ Next up, Yuta! (4)

Yuta? Scorpio rising. I did try to see if he fits anywhere else but landed right back to Scorpio. One main reason, when he smiles, it's real. His healing and genuine smile is definitely a Scorpio rising trait. He's also pretty quiet in general but can get wild *insert clip of Yuta and Taeyong's chair race* and maybe even stir things up. Scorpio is associated with, Hades. Hades is generally a warm soul unlike his gruesome depictions. He's just a peaceful yet lonely guy. When he loves he LOVES (5) Traits seen in our double Scorpio royalty, Yuta. Winwin, Mark, Shotaro and Jungwoo is his Kore and Cerberus (you decide who's who). 

Easy tackle, now we've got Ten! Your local cat mom. As I say that, I guess Leo. Leo risings have feline features and traits, which Ten definitely has. When you watch his relay cam, his day's pretty chill and made more fun by his cats. They're just positive morning people and Ten really has that effect. Leo is associated with Apollo and Heracles (and more). (6) Apollo's a talented man (if you read Lore Olympus, I just hope you don't associate those characters with the actual deities) and so is Heracles. What do they have in common with Ten? Well, both Apollo and Ten are artistic, gifted with languages, and talented in music. With Heracles? Well, we know he's a hero, an ace. Leo is also the sun. The core of our system. We can definitely agree on Ten being NCT's talented ace, which all supports my guess of him as a Leo rising. Next, Winwin.

My first guesses for Winwin were either an Aries or Leo rising. Though, at the end, I settled for Aries. The entirety of NCT is in love (obviously, exaggerated) with Winwin, and fire signs naturally have that magnetism. Aries rules the head area, and one frequent habit of Winwin's is scratching his head. He also tends to put his head forward (called a nerd neck, due to book reading) which is typical of an Aries rising. He also appeals with his eyes when he wants something, also very Aries. Winwin as an Aries rising just feels true and self-explanatory. 

Next on our list is Jungwoo. A total Slytherin. Be a fool and fall for them, I dare you–oh never mind, you already have. Safe to say that Jungwoo is a Libra rising. Libra is Aphrodite afterthewholebeingbornoutofcastratedtesticlesthenformedfromseafoamshenanigans. We all know that Librans are pretty people. So pretty it's sickening, I'm getting too personal now. BACK ON TOPIC. I also had the thought of him being a Leo– I mean, if you've seen NCT World, Jungwoo definitely shone. Leos and Libras are similar in my opinion so it could be why I'm so unsure about it. Not many know but Aphrodite is a war goddess. Her role is very watered down, maybe because war was just not sexy to the Ancient Greeks. Still, Aphrodite conquered hearts, and Jungwoo has that main stage. Life is like a runway, especially with the way he walks. He also loves connections and making people laugh, both an Aphrodite and Apollo trait. Reason why I settled for Libra is that the first impressions of Jungwoo is that he looks serious, radiated sophistication but also wild. Aphrodite, being a magnetic and adventurous (iykwim) mad lad, has a definite influence on Jungwoo.

The next member is Lucas (12 more to go!). Lucas tries his best to make people happy. He loves seeing people be happy. And seeing how he says sorry when things don't seem to be exciting or done his usual way, I'm convinced he's a Libra rising.

I've written notes down but I have school so I'll complete this after LMAO

Back (new classes today so I'm hnghh). Okay, Mark! I believe he's where I left off. Mark is an Aries rising opinion. Also, while trying to hunt for their birth times, I stumbled upon someone saying Mark's birth time is 10:34pm. I tried it and it was Aries rising! Some habits that Mark does that's total Aries; touchy, laughs a lot, swears more than most, loud personality. He also has the Aries t-zone. His lovely gullbrows~

Next, Xiaojun. I was honestly stuck on him until I watched a fancam of him walking to the airport. His steps seem very grounded. Possibly, Taurus. I also thought he was a Scorpio and Leo but with the way Xiaojun gets defensive doesn't feel very water or fire (Aries is an exception). Xiaojun also enjoys food and cooking. He finds comfort in work, likes the easy way better, he's also quite practical. He's also hardworking. Probably either finishes homework the day it gets handed or when he's stressed. No in between. (I erased everything, I wrote by accident...) 

Hendery has the Air sign look and also the Earth sign vibe but in the end, I settled for Sagittarius. Why? Well, Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter (Zeus) and we all know that Zeus can get impulsive. Hendery seems to be so. Sag is also associated Dionysus, the stereotypical wild "people love people" drunk. Which Hendery also seems to be so. That's all for him. Next up Renjun.

Renjun has a habit of scratching or just touching his ear and head, his fight instinct is on 24/7, gets frustrated when something doesn't go right, very attentive when people tell stories, uses his whole body when laughs (stomping, throwing his neck back like it don't break). I guess he's either a Gemini, Pisces or Aries. The easily bored so they make chaos but also is helpful when needed trio, Hermes, Poseidon and Ares. Renjun just has a distinct style I can't pinpoint. No solid guess.

Dream's papa, Jeno. I believe he's a Capricorn rising. He just has that long faced, big nosed and intense eyes that Capricorn risings, from what I've observed, tend to have. I've also took up Libra and Taurus as other options but I went with Cap. Even if his go-to noises is confusion. I probably don't make 100% sense but I hope it's good enough. Anyway, Jeno has a potential to become a leader and Caps are great leaders. Not perfect but great. He also has some competitiveness in him.

7 more left! Haechan's turn! Haechan really does twist and turn people's heads. He could be a Gemini rising, mostly because he uses his hands whenever he talks, laughs, sing. He's also a trickster. Maybe Scorpio since he has that rbf and the presence that makes you quiver when you meet him in person. Another possibility is Aries, he's wild, impatient and banter skills are top notch. His silhouette either looks Arian or Scorpian. Face, Geminian or Arian. What do you think? 

Next, Na Jaemin. Virgo rising. Jaemin knows how to smile, like he knows how to attract people with it, and we all know his smile is beautiful. He also has that motherly attitude towards his friends. A total introvert as well and is just calm (but can get naggy and fastidious). CEO at eye rolling, even if habitual and unintentional. GenZ Artemis. 

Next, Yangyang. I'm dead sure on him being a Cancer. The way he walks is so baby? and my Cancer rising friends tend to do little skips and sometimes waddle. Whenever an opportunity arises, he takes it. He also enjoys comfort. These may be Taurus rising traits as well (they're similar in many ways) but when I watched ETC, Yangyang seems to have a protective side. A clingy side. So, I went with Cancer. 

Shotaro is next! Always smiling, gentle voice, admires people and loves fun. Libra. A possibility is Aries. This is based on appearance. Arians tend to have weak chins (chins that don't stick out). He also has the "always look forward to tomorrow" vibe.

I-I don't remember who's next...

I suddenly forgot what I wrote before this. I should've planned this. SUNGCHAN. My Virgo buddy. When I first saw him his vibe screamed Virgo, he just had that short face Virgos tend to have. It's a mutable sign so it tends to get overpowered but every virgo I know has a short face despite being different ascendants. I was struggling figuring him out but I decided on Pisces. I'll be taking a stretch here. So descendant is how a person views the world. His being Virgo. Sungchan seems to look at the world as structured so he could feel the want to rebel. He seems to enjoy chaos but probably helps mediate the situation for the sake of doing so. My thoughts are slowly getting tangled.

CHENLE. Chenle's a virgo rising and mostly because his rbf is piercing. He always looks like he's observing and silently judging people. It makes more sense for him to be a Scorpio as well. Yes, he's bright and fun but Scorpios do have that side. Just more serious and a lot of roasting.

FINALLY THE MAKNAE. Jisung Park. Libra rising. He just likes peace but when he's chaotic, he'd want you to match his vibe. A balance, in a way. He also seems to get frustrated/stressed easily, gullible, awkward hands, and he's always quite pretty. Calming to look at. That's all. What do you think their signs are? I want hear your opinion :DD Also, I hope your exams went well!! You probably put in your 100% best so of course it did!!

//

First of all, thank you so much for your support! My exams actually went well and I’m so relieved I got it all over with for this semester.^^ And now, as you’ve already noticed in an ask I’ve answered earlier, I don’t cover NCT on this blog and therefore, I haven’t really given their rising signs much thought so far, so I’m not going to really have an opinion myself but I wanted to thank you so much for your hard work with all of this and for sharing it with us!! It was super interesting to read and I can only say that I think all of guesses make sense to me.

As a Leo rising myself, I felt super flattered while reading Ten’s paragraph - I’d feel super honoured to share my rising sign with him and I also feel like his energy is familiar to me, so I could totally believe that to be true!^^ And also, omg, I’d love for Yangyang to be a Cancer rising! I seem to attract Cancer risings left and right and he’s recently become one of my ults, so that would be great :’) (I’ll definitely start to analyze him more in the near future haha)

Oh, oh!! Btw, my close friend @jacksvnshine made a very in-depth analysis of Mark’s possible rising sign and she guessed him to be an Aries rising like you did! She’s so amazing at what she does and if it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t know a thing about astrology. So I can highly recommend checking out her blog and I also really want to link her analysis for you here as you might find it interesting to read, and it’s exceptionally well made!^-^

I’m sorry that I can’t really give you my opinion on their rising signs, I haven’t studied them enough in that sense :( and I personally struggle with rising sign guesses because I always feel like I don’t know enough to make an “accurate” guess but oh well- a guess is a guess, we can never know for sure but my mind doesn’t really want to accept that. :’)

I truly enjoyed reading through your messages and guesses, thank you again for sharing this with us!! I’m sure there’ll be others who’ll find it interesting to read as well!^-^

[reversecreek]

snickers feverishly at myself for bringing in a 5th... who do i think i am? unstoppable? invincible? suddenly ripples my titanium plated pecs. maybe so. u can find her pinterest here n her playlist here. 

* margaret qualley, cis female + she/her  | you know bradley milligan, right? they’re twenty-four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, all of their life? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to looking for knives by dyan like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole snow angels trampled through by your father’s footprints, casually reading a newspaper that’s catching flame & stubbing a cigarette against the wing mirror of a parked cop car thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is november 11th, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt she/her  )

HISTORY:

bradley has this memory of meeting her grandmother for the first time n everything in the room was frozen still. even the air. she didn’t feel like she cld move n she got the impression this is how it’d always been in the milligan lineage. the only thing that was allowed to act of it’s own accord was her grandmother’s eyes as she tracked every slightest flinch of muscle. when her father left the room her grandmother reached out and took bradley’s hand n bradley looked at this like it was smthn she’d never seen before until her grandmother leaned close and all she could stare at was a nicotine stain on one of her front teeth. “he’s cold, isn’t he? he’s always been cold. i don’t think he’s mine.” bradley could tell from how tight she held her hand that he was. she could tell by the way she smiled as she said it, too. the way she felt obliged to smile back.

growing up in a huge white house in aquila drive w pruned hedges sounds idyllic n looks it too. swanky cars w tinted windows in the long driveway. always men filing in and out under the cloak of night wearing expensive suits n smiles worthy of a politician’s billboard. bradley’s mum alyssa thought so too n that’s hw she got into this whole mess tbh. tony milligan is very good at advertising. he cld package a jarred human heart as strawberry jam and convince u to spread it on ur toast if he wanted to. he could make u smile politely as u ate ur own. 

alyssa ws this very pretty blonde kind of mysterious presence in a room. everyone wanted to kno her story or fk her but noone rly treated her like a person more just like a puzzle to solve. john green syndrome alert..... literally manic pixie dream girled bt on turbo charge. there were vague whispers she’d run away from home when she appeared in town out of nowhere bt nothing concrete. tony decided he wanted to crack the case n once he set his mind to something there was no changing it. they wound up embroiled in a whirlwind romance. head over heels. he came at romance hard and fast as a freight train. alyssa knew he was into shady things but not quite the full extent of it n honestly she didn’t care bc she wanted security n a family to call her own n tony promised that. they were married within a year. 

tony came frm money bt he wanted to carve his own path n make his own legacy. destined fr greatness he’d tell her. we’re destined for greatness. it sounds nice doesn’t it! alyssa thought so too.

(drugs mention tw) slowly over the yrs he essentially forged his own crime organisation tht only grew. he opened a strip club down the seedier side of irving called ‘no angels’ n this became the front thru which his gang ran drugs in the back (predominantly coke n they pride themselves fr having a Superior Blend apparently) as well as laundering cash n this also was kind of their home base to hang

(abuse tw) their marriage increasingly lost it’s shine n alyssa came to realise she’d been sold a lie n she didn’t rly know this person or what he was capable of right around the time bradley was born. by then it was kind of like Wow i am rly in this n there is not an exit door huh. i won’t go into details bt things were not good at all. bradley witnessed n experienced a lot of things she shouldn’t have growing up. she didn’t understand why other kids drew home in all these different coloured crayons like they were bright places to be. she didn’t understand why everyone got so excited when the bell rang at the end of the day bc she just felt sick. she rationalised tht this was normal when she was younger bc sometimes kids talked abt the monsters under their beds giving them nightmares n she thought mayb they were talking abt their dads too. as she got older she realised tht actually her world wasn’t the same as anyone else’s n she also realised no-one wld ever be able to tell her why. she started becoming friends with the angry feeling in her chest tht she used to try and swallow around this time. often she’d wander the mall for a while to put off going home. smoke on random park benches. watch trains rattle thru town from the vantage point of a random rooftop. 

(abuse, missing person implied, murder implied & grief tw) when bradley was 12 she woke up and all of her mum’s clothes were gone frm their drawers. no shoes anywhere. a framed photo of them at the beach holding bradley as a baby vanished from over the mantelpiece. when bradley asked her dad what was going on, tony essentially said “it was exhausting her. being here. being your mother. she didn’t want to do it any more, so now she’s gone” n then he hugged her. little details leaked into the mix over the yrs. at one point tony dismissed her as having flown overseas to a foreign country to drink in the sun like she’d always wanted even tho alyssa always told bradley she liked the snow best (once she even walked outside as it fell in a thin lace nightgown when tony was out n when bradley said “mom you’re gonna get cold” she only tugged her down and made her do snow angels until her lips looked blue). the most significant memory bradley can never shake from her head is her mother cupping a yellow tulip at the park n saying she hated them. when bradley asked why she only turned and smiled at her as she stroked the hair from her face n then said “because they look so happy”. after bradley’s mum vanished a long flower bed at the bottom of the garden was suddenly overrun with dozens of freshly planted yellow tulips. whenever bradley looked at them out of her window she got this sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach like she was visiting a cemetery. she suspected what had happened to her mum (especially as rumours circulated within tony’s organisation abt alyssa being unfaithful with someone tht used to work fr him) bt she cld never bring herself to truly accept it. thus she ws stuck in this strange purgatory state of not-quite-anger at her mum for “leaving” and not-quite-grief.

bradley rly started to transgress in school after her mum was gone. alyssa was always kind of a character when she’d pick bradley up (wasn’t doing well n acted kind of ‘eccentric’ i suppose u cld say) so tony managed to spin it all as a child acting out in the wake of an unfit mother uprooting n abandoning. bradley became........ interesting. JKHGFSSKJGHFSGHSKFGHFG. she’d snap n resort to violence very easily. very desensitised to it. students were kind of scared of her tbh. as this progressed into proper high school she got in w the more rowdy popular crowd solely bc she was so fking.... wild for lack of a better word. rly would just do anything fr the thrill. had no sense of ‘i shouldn’t do this bc it’s dangerous’. partied harder than anyone. bit back harder than anyone. no filter. hung w a lot of guys honestly bc they had less morals n either found her scariness cool or wanted to fk <3

(hospitalisation, depression & drugs tw) she’s had. a few stints in psychiatric institutions fr various reasons tbh. missed a small chunk of her senior yr fr this but it wasn’t widely known just kind of rumoured. she showcases a lot of similar symptoms to her mum who struggled w severe depression (which was difficult to cope w when ur husband was often pouring ur prescription down the drain fr kicks) n in order to compensate fr the lows she takes a lot of things to kick them into highs. drinks n snorts too much. bradley i love u bt i’m begging u to seek healthier coping mechanisms......

as the yrs went on (especially once alyssa had gone) tony rly started trying to integrate bradley into the business side of things...... she literally. is named bradley bc he was expecting a boy n he was like well let’s still call her bradley. n had in mind she’d still fulfil the role he wanted her to of being his little protege so to speak.... both sexist n ugly all in one fell swoop...... an example of this is he literally. bought her a mint green switchblade for her 14th birthday n named it tinkerbell bc it would “die without attention” aka using it. tht sounds like a healthy gift to give a child tony congratulations sis <3

in an ideal world bradley wld have gone to uni to study psychology bc she jst wants to know how the fk her dad is literally like that bt she probably stuck around n is now managing no angels along with billy n marco (billy’s in her dad’s gang n is, u guessed it, a cunt, n marco is his sort of right hand man so to speak) bc tony’s in the closest neighbouring city overseeing a second ‘no angels’ opening up there to expand into a franchise n widen their income margins. bradley wld also be sort of used as a honey trap type deal once she got older if they needed to lure ppl places n sometimes still is bt it depends. the guys in the club all know not to mess w bradley bc she’s tony’s daughter n literally kind of scary herself sometimes bt there’s also this certain allure tht comes with being the boss’ daughter n it kind of comes across in how they act or talk abt her. yes i will kill them all n no i won’t feel bad abt it <3

think that’s kind of all u need to kno history wise... blinks one eye out of sync w the other..... runs to personality

PERSONALITY:

a phrase i wld always use to describe bradley in old intros is “like a cup of black coffee with one grain of sugar that u don’t taste until the last sip”. also dark chocolate. lime. liquorice. she’s an acquired taste n i feel like u either love her or u hate her. 

cannot express how unpredictably chaotic she is..... frequently throws a drink in a stranger’s face jst to start something bc she’s bored. loves to hurl cheese slices across the room so they slap onto someone’s face out of nowhere. likes smashing things. stubbing cigarettes out on faces in framed family photographs. will literally pick a lock n then smash the window besides it to defeat the whole purpose just bc she found how neat it was boring. does anything fr the adrenaline n thrill. gets into far too many fights n fights dirty. probably been thrown out of every bar in town at least three times. banned from a bunch too.

she’s witty bt she has a dark sense of humour..... can be quite mean.......... loves to roast ppl for no reason........ honestly has some nathan young frm misfits aspects in that sense like jst seems untouchable emotionally n like she doesn’t take anything seriously n is fking outrageous about it.....

has this quality abt her tht kind of scares herself sometimes. it’s like she recognises parts of her dad in her. she’s very perceptive (bc she’s had to be over the yrs trying to read every micro-expression of her dad’s to predict what’s next) n like emotionally intelligent in a way which is ironic bc her own emotions r just an absolute minefield.... bt. she can read people quite well. gets this eerily calm look abt her sometimes n it’s jst like god what’s. she thinking. what’s she’s gna do. i’m shaking. a cool n controlled kind of rage can often be scarier than the explosive type n bradley does that well. grits my teeth n tugs on my collar....

very strong on the surface. hates being vulnerable. has this ingrained idea that crying is childish or rly any kind of emotional display within herself. 50% not taking things seriously 50% angry. tht’s how she comes across....... internally? whole different story. bt ppl don’t see that.

very cavalier abt some things. will flash her tits n not even think abt it. jst very out there...... one of her closest friends is a homeless man named joe who wears neon purple fishnets on his head n loves to spit on ppl from over an underpass. finds eccentric ppl like this funny n surrounds herself w them. loves to be kept on her toes.

LOVES driving stolen cars down the wrong side of the highway. it’s a lot.

fiercely loyal to a fault to a select few bt if u wrong her personally this can switch pretty quick. quite a force to b reckoned w n will hold a grudge. bt like. if ur a Chosen One she’d bury a body for u no questions asked. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS

deals to u: bradley isn’t like full time into dealing bt she does do it sometimes.... treats it kind of like a hobby bc the lesser ranked can do tht shit as far as she’s concerned bt.. sometimes also jst gets bored n is like. why not. might be chaotic. mayb they’ll try to rob me <3 we love the thrill <3 or like..... if ur friends w her she’ll deal to u n no she will not do a friends discount <3 or if she does there will definitely be some sort of stipulation attached <3

high skl crew: if ur muse is local n ws an absolutely demonic hell spawn in high skl tht went to 1974547254 parties n was outrageously chaotic n rude then. bradley probably was friends w them <3 her friendships tend to be surface level bt they’d definitely go out a bunch bt whether they actually knew a lot abt her life is debatable bt we could explore options fr this

people who work at no angels: no angels is her dad’s strip club in irving that she kind of helps to run now. it’s kind of a shifty environment. the place where ud have an outrageous bachelor party. u go for the first time w a fake id n u get served bt u also get ur wallet stolen n ur convinced someone spat in ur drink n u also kind of think there might b a hit on u now after u made eye contact too long w a broad shouldered man smoking in a back booth. scary environment. testament to her dad as a person. maybe ur muse is a dancer there or works the bar or security or whatever u name it....

ma’am are u ok?: ur muse found bradley passed out across two bus seats one time in smudged dark eyeliner a silver slip dress n the world’s chunkiest combat boots this town hs ever seen. sometimes she winds up in spots like this when she goes too hard n it’s absolutely dangerous n reckless bt that’s jst bradley <3 mayb they forged an unlikely friendship frm this strange meeting or maybe even? dare i say it? a romance? opposite worlds colliding? good influence? let’s go crazy. release ur inhibitions. feel the rain on ur skin.

hook-ups: bradley’s cavalier abt this stuff..... very unemotional typically..... mayb we cld do an unrequited thing that wld be angsty n fun altho i won’t lie i don’t kno if she’d be the one to catch the feelings.... she rarely sleeps over bt once when she woke up in someone’s bed she hiked over to straddle them carefully as possible so they wldn’t wake up n then pressed her knife to their neck as a fun little surprise where she said boo when they opened their eyes.... she’s a lot clearly.

watermelon slugger, hiiii: bradley has this habit where she gets a bunch of watermelons n then goes to a rooftop n throws them over the edge to watch them explode when they hit the pavement.... maybe ur muse almost got hit by one once n were like WTF???????? another quirky meet cute moment like the bus one <3 can’t stop w them <3 maybe she randomly invited ur muse to do it w her when they were like. a stranger of f the street. she was bored. decided to adopt them as a science experiment. we cn elaborate on this probably....

ouch charlie: similar territory bt she also sometimes shoots pedestrians w a bb gun from rooftops. mayb ur muse wld always get hit by one on a certain route they walked n finally one day they saw her head ducking down behind a ledge n then they see her in the street one day n are like HEY IT’S YOU............. WTF? n bradley’s like ya i’m christ risen again it’s a lot to take in i know...

rly jst anything... mutually destructive friends... exes.... in one rp a character tried to get close to bradley so he cld write an expose all book about her n her family which i found so fking funny so i’ll request that again.... people she’s fought.... ppl whose gf/bf she’s fk’d n it’s caused enemy status.... someone whose place she broke into and shaved their eyebrows off in the night only to draw them on again in crudely thin permanent sharpie lines.... roommates cld be fun n sexy i’d love that actually.... jst anything rly. go wild. kisses everyone tenderly on cheeks.

[astrochiron]

the signs :: ANTi // rihanna

Aries- Woo

“I bet she could never make you cry
‘Cause the scars on your heart are still mine

Tell me that she couldn't get this deep

She can almost be the worst of me”

These lyrics display Rihanna taking pride in the wounds she inflicted during the battle that she considers love. Aries would be proud of their own war wounds but prouder of the ones they gave their opponent. They're very confident and present themselves aggressively, much like the delivery of this line.

“These days you've been feeling lonely

Yeah I've been feeling lonely too

I'ma fuck it up, won't you show me some'

Run it back like you owe me some'”

Aries are independent and often repel people. This line displays the affects of that, shwoing the lonliness the sign often feels but doesn't often express. The end of this exerpt point towards Aries' overt sexuality, sans the emotional connection, like Scorpio and sans the romance, like Leo; just raw sexuality.

Overall

This is first and foremost, this song is a break-up song, which is interesting considering that Rih and Travis Scott (the unfeatured feature) had broken up by the time this song came out. This shows the conflict present in a break up, associated with Mars ruled Aries. The sound of the song is also quite raw and aggressive, almost like alarms with blaring rock tones.

Taurus- Yeah, I Said It

“And I think I kinda like ya


Up against the wall, we don't need a title

Yeah, I said it


Yeah, I said it, bae


Yeah, I said it, man, fuck a title”

Taureans are known for their direct approach and this line addresses that: “Hey, I like you, let’s fuck around; no title needed”. This and lack of interest in formality are very Taurus to me. This excerpt displays sensuality and comfort all in one.

“You can be rough, boy, but you won't

Give me some love, boy, give it to me 'til the morn'”

Stubborn and gruff are traits usually associated with Taurus. Rihanna knows, and likes, that her lover can be rough with her, but she knows he won’t, instead focusing on the pleasure of them being together. She’s craving long-lasting sex which can be associated with Taurus’ slow-moving nature and its focus on physical pleasure.

Overall

The song is overtly sexual and has literal moans at the end of it. Aries, Taurus, Leo and Scorpio are all associated with the various sides of sex and this song’s focus on the pleasurable, sensual, and long-lasting aspects of sex connect it to Taurus. This is opposed to the rougher and more primal sound of “Woo”

Gemini- Consideration

“I came fluttering in from Neverland

Time can never stop me, no, no, no, no

I know you've tried to

I came riding in on a pale white horse”

The first two lies focus on Gemini’s Mercurial nature. Neverland evokes thoughts of Peter Pan and Tinker Bell, the fairy-like boy and his very fairy companion. Geminis can be associated with fairies. Mischievous, fluttering, intelligent, and ever-busy. The excerpt goes on to illustrate Gemini’s duality as Rihanna then goes on from fluttering fairies to becoming Death on its pale white horse.

“When I look outside my window

I can't get no piece of mind

When I look outside my window

I can't get no peace of mind”

“Piece” versus “Peace” wordplay is a link to Gemini’s aforementioned versatility as well as using wordplay; which fits, given Gemini’s association with communication. Furthermore, peace of mind is uncommon for Gemini who has a busy brain. On this same note, searching for a “piece” of mind is much more common, trying to recall a memory or repelling an insistent one.

Overall

This song is an homage to Rihanna writing a lot of this album. She wanted the music industry to take her seriously as an artist and decided to prove herself by having a writing credit on all but one of the songs on the album (the cover was obviously written by someone else). Gemini is associated with writing and communication, making this very fitting. SZA and Rihanna’s back and forth also mirrors the twin mascots of Gemini.

Cancer- Close to You

“Nothing but a tear, that's all for breakfast

Watching you pretend you're unaffected

You're pulling our connections, expecting me to let you go

But I won't”

While I also cringe at Cancer’s constant connection to crying, I think it lies in place of maturity. Cancers are cardinal and, as such, are the masters of their domain. Cancers are able to adequately wade through their emotions and know the benefit of a good cry, as opposed to her Water sign sisters. Rihanna needs a good cry and has one. This excerpt also displays empathy as well as an inability to give up old memories. Cancers are tied to memories and the subjectivity of them.

“I know you don't need my protection

But I'm in love, can't blame me for checking

I love in your direction, hoping that the message goes”

Cancer’s protectiveness is exhibited in these lines. The subject of her care has obviously rebuffed her attempts at being protective; or perhaps she truly is being a bit suffocating with her care. Cancer is associated with the mother and these traits are often associated with mothers and Cancer placement alike. But at the end of the day, Cancer focuses on their emotions first and foremost. She’s forced to cut off a toxic situation and love this person from a distance, loving in their direction instead of loving them in person.

Overall

This is the most balladic song on the album, which always give me the emotionally heavy vibes of Cancer. The heavy piano accompaniment also evokes a traditional and old fashioned style; very Cancer. The song’s  overall focus is on the refusal to move on from a past love which can be linked to Cancer’s tendency to hold on to the past.

Leo- Love on the Brain

“And you got me like, "Oh, what you want from me?"

(What you want from me?)

And I tried to buy your pretty heart, but the price too high”

Leo is, by far, the most giving sign when it comes to affection and gifts. This line shows that Rihanna attempted to put a price on love and give her lover gifts to secure their love for her. When that price don't to work, Leos will give their whole heart for their love. The line “what you want from me” exhibit's Leo’s willingness to do whatever it takes for their partner.

“Must be love on the brain

That’s got me feeling this way

It beats me black and blue but it fucks me so good

And I can’t get enough”

If you couldn’t guess from the previous excerpt, this one solidifies the fact that Leo rules the heart in medical astrology. More symbolic associations with the heart are also associated with the sign too, like love and romance. Leos tend to focus on the fun side of the relationship, though, ignoring the work (like Libras) and the struggles (like Scorpio). Even through those things, the love and romance is still foremost in her brain.

Overall

The Doo Wop style of the song reminds me of the 50s; very glam and Leo. It also evokes the idea of sweethearts and school dances and all the other things privileged people of the 50s got to enjoy; romanticization of romance, regardless of the pain that may have been inflicted. The song’s overall focus is on the power of love and the ability of it to conquer all negative things for better or worse.

Virgo- Kiss It Better

“What are you willing to do?

Oh, tell me what you’re willing to do

(Kiss it, kiss it better, baby)”

This line discusses giving a sacrifice in order to get something you want, a process not unfamiliar to Virgos. Even sexually (as this song is) Virgo is servile and wants to please their partner. Their aim is to heal and assist. Rihanna’s partner is taking the role of the Virgo here, as Virgos are the physical healers and nurses. This is interesting considering that Rihanna is a Pisces, the sister sign and partner of Virgo. 

“Man, fuck yo pride

Just take it on back, boy, take it on back, boy [..]

Hurtin' vibe, man, it hurts inside when I look you in yo’ eye”

Pride is definitely a Virgo trait, again, painting her partner in a Virgoan light. Rihanna wants him to let go of his pride and admit that he’s hurt too and that he needs healing as mush as she does. Virgos have a tendency to get past their own pain in order to help others and to get things accomplished. They need to heal each other and, at that moment, the sex is doing it.

Overall

This song focuses on an already broken relationship that is in need of serious mending. There are several methods that are needed to repair a broken relationship and sex is definitely one of them as physical healing may be required before the emotional healing.

Libra- Same Ol’ Mistakes

“I can just hear them now

"How could you let us down?"

But they don't know what I found

Or see it from this way around”

Libras are always looking at how others view them as they're associated with he seventh house of our charts, which controls how we see the world and the projection we actively use when in relation with others. That’s why Libras are often indecisive, as they’re concerned with not only their wants and needs, but the perception of others too. They see multiple points of view and others don’t tend to bother to try.

“I know that you think it's fake

Maybe fake's what I like

Point is I have the right

Not thinking in black and white

I'm thinking it's worth the fight”

Libras are often considered fake, a they’re great at conforming to the situation they’re in and with the people surrounding them. This line pokes a hole in the negative view of this though; maybe, I want to be fake. Libra’s focus on justice and reserving energy for the right cause is also displayed in the latter lines of the excerpt, displaying Libra’s often overlooked ruthless attention to fairness and dispensing justice.

Overall

The whole song focuses on how a romance or connection completely changed the person in the song, a love is known to completely change Libras for better or worse. They tend to immerse themselves in their relationships. The song is full of backing vocals that can represent the self-doubt Libra often faces. They represent how they’re always checking themselves.

Scorpio- Work

“He see me do mi

Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt!

So me put in

Work, work, work, work, work, work […]

Meh nuh cyar if ‘im

Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt, hurting”

“He see me do mi dirt” references some secretive actions that Rihanna has done, likely cheating or something similar. She’s know required to put in work to make things right or to simply ge this mind off of the transgression by “putting in work” or having sex. Both secrets and sex are centered around the sign of Scorpio, especially using both to manipulate and control a situation. Scorpios may go to the extreme in reaction and sometimes just to get a response, pointing toward Rihanna not caring if she’d hurt her partner with her actions, only wishing to make them right, now.

“Nuh body touch me you nuh righteous

Nuh badda, text me in a crisis

I believed all of your dreams, adoration

You took my heart and my keys and my patience

You took my heart on my sleeve for decoration

You mistaken my love I brought for you for foundation”

At their core, Scorpios crave someone to turn to when things get dark. When a crisis happens, Rihanas wants someone to turn to for support. The later part of the excerpt points toward Scorpio’s tendency to put their all into others. This often leaves them feeling unappreciated if the other person isn’t all in or isn't as intense as they are.

Overall

This song is as overtly sexual as Aries’ “Woo” and Taurus’ “Yeah, I Said It”, but it focuses on the connection and power gained from sex. Rihanna uses sex to get her partner over their troubles, including her working too much and ever her possibly stepping out on him. Drake’s inclusion in the song also didn't go unnoticed, as he is a Scorpio Sun and adds even more sex appeal and Plutonian energy to this hit.

Sagittarius- Desperado

“Gotta get up out of here

And yuh ain't leavin' me behind

I know you won't cause we share common interests

You need me, there ain't no leaving me behind

Never, no, no, I just want outta here, yeah

Once I'm gone, ain’t no going back”

Sagittarius’ need for freedom and to roam is keenly exhibited by this excerpt. Rihanna’s parter is, again, the focus of the sign’s energy as he wants to leave. It isn't know whether he wants to leave their situation, their location, or Rihanna, but she wants to throw caution to the wind and go with him regardless. Sag’s need constant and renewed interest and good conversation to maintain their interest for someone. He and Rihanna have a lot in common and she hopes that can keep them bonded.

“If you want, we can be runaways

Running from any sight of love

Yeah, yeah, there ain’t nothin'

There ain't nothin' here for me

There ain't nothin' here for me anymore

But I don't wanna be alone”

Sag’s are very much known as the nomads of the sign, needing to travel and experience things in order to feel like they’re experiencing life. Rihanna is taking on the traits of this nomad, wanting to run away from the stagnancy and boredom that often comes with settling into love. These are two things that Sag is known to have not much interest in and is known to run away from emotional connection when unready to settle down and share their experience with someone.

Overall

A “desperado” is defined as “a desperate or reckless person, especially a criminal” by Oxford. Sagittarius is a fire sign, often down for reckless tact and a desperate need for freedom, making them desperados in life. The criminal activity isn't too much associated with Sag, but who knows once they get a drink or six in them.

Capricorn- Needed Me

“I was good on my own, that's the way it was

That's the way it was

You was good on the low for a faded fuck

On some faded love”

Capricorns are known for independence. Not like Aries wanting to do things on their own or Sagittarius wanting to experience things with through their own unbiased eyes, but Capricorn can be something of a hermit, being okay with reaching their goals by themselves and for themselves. They’re not particularly known for emotional connections, leaving that to their sister sign, Cancer.

“You needed me

Ooh, you needed me

To feel a little more, and give a little less

Know you hate to confess

But baby ooh, you needed me”

When Capricorns do decide to share their lives with others, they may assume people are operating under ulterior motives. Rihanna feels that she was used as a status symbol due to her success by her partner; hell, maybe several partners. Capricorn’s are foremost interested in their status and may often not be sure if people are attracted to what Cap can do for them or in Cap themselves. This proves to be true in this case, as she is said to have given more to the relationship than him and he felt even less for her because of it.

Overall

This song has a definite theme of female empowerment that can be appreciated by the feminine Cardinal sign of Capricorn. Capricorn women do typically embody the role of a woman in charge and demand respect, even from heir partner. The tempo of the song is laid back while conveying very bold lyrics, very much the Capricornian vibe.

Aquairus- James Joint

“I'd rather be smoking weed whenever we breathe

Every time you kiss me

Don't say that you miss me

Just come get me”

Besides Pisces, Aquarius has the strongest connection to drugs in the zodiac. Whereas Pisces is seeking escape (see “Higher” up next), but more of a normal activity that unlocks the mind and allows one to look at multiple points of view. The excerpt goes on to exhibit Aquarius’ hate for words of affection. “Just come get me” shows their tendency to relying on acts of love instead of words, as Aquarius is an air sign and they know that words are simply wind.

“Just making scenes, here come the police

They know about your history

How you live and love like "fuck rules"?

Don't care why, just know I love you”

“[F]uck rules” is possibly all I need to explain this line. Aquarians are very anti-rules unless they've been proven effective and this instance shows her partner, James Joint, is very much interested in making his own rules. Their fight and arrival of the police represent unexpected circumstances, instances ruled by Aquarius’ ruler, Uranus.

Overall

This song is an interlude. They’re used as a break from the flow of the album and to introduce some for the quirkier sides of the artist, a perfect Aquarian venue for expression. The song was also released early on 4/20 as a teaser for the album, further connecting it with drugs and weed culture.

Pisces- Higher

“This whiskey got me feelin' pretty

So pardon if I'm impolite

I just really need your ass with me

I'm sorry 'bout the other night”

Pisces is connected to being under the influence, seeking escape and rest from the tiresome world. Rihanna is in her hotel room and obviously cross-faded, wanting nothing more than to spill her feelings to her lover. This excerpts focus on apologies and the general clinginess are also often associated with Pisces.

“You take me higher, higher than I've ever been, babe

Just come over, let's pour a drink, babe

I hope I ain't calling you too late, too late

You light my fire

Let's stay up late and smoke a J

[…]

But I'm drunk instead, with a full ashtray

With a little bit too much to say”

The whole second part of the song is the content of her emotions spilling over like I mentioned earlier. It’s a bit chaotic and train--of-thought, fitting the mutable nature of the Water sign Pisces. Pisces also gets inspiration from its connection to those around them. For them, the solitude that Rihanna is experiencing can be a win/lose situation, allowing them to feel their on feelings without being filtered by the vibe of everyone around them, but it also leaves them alone in their spiraling thoughts and occasionally self-destructive tendencies.

Overall

Overall, the song is full of raw emotion and honesty. It only took Rihanna less than half an hour to write and that, again, denotes its purity. This hits home even more when you consider that Rihanna herself is a Pisces. The title of the song shows a connection to Pisces’ association to escapism and getting high to not feel so low.

check your moon sign (for the song that makes you comfortable and puts you in your emotions), sun sign (the song that makes you happy and the one you ride around to) and venus sign (the one that speaks to your inner artist).

[fieryfantasybooklover]

Everything Isn't Enough - A Jemma fic

First collab with @pleaseleaveamessageblog

SHE IS AWESOME PLEASE CHECK OUT HER BLOG AND HER WRITING!!

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Diana Wrayburn was left in charge of the Los Angeles Institute for the weekend. The Institute’s normal heads, Helen and Aline Penhallow-Blackthorn, had gone on a short trip with the Consul and his husband. The majority of Helen’s younger siblings were also away from the Institute. Mark away in Faerie with Cristina Rosales and Kieran Kingson. Drusilla in Idris studying at the Shadowhunter Academy. And Tiberius, far away in the Carpathians, at the Scholomance. Julian and Octavian were still in L.A. Tavvy, still being under the age required to patrol, remained at the Institute with Diana while Julian and his former parabatai, now girlfriend, Emma Carstairs were on patrol duty for the night. 

It was a normal night. Patrol nights had been slow recently, so the two were perfectly fine with going by themselves. Also, they were Emma Carstairs and Julian Blackthorn. The two were basically legends at this point. They had been transformed into True Nephilim not even two years ago and lived through it. The two were the dream team. They were damn near unbeatable. That’s what everyone believed, at least.

“Think it’ll be a slow night, Em?” Julian asked. The two had just begun their drive into the city, Julian watching the road and Emma the sensor. They did not expect to see anything out of the ordinary. Because shifts normally alternated, Diana had briefed them on Mark and Cristina’s patrol from last night. No irregular activity had been noticed.

“If it’s slow we can always drive down to the beach,” Emma answered. “We’ll have time.” And just as expected, they did just that. After about an hour and a half of no problems or run-ins with a demon, the pair decided to take their patrol to a place with a better view of the sunset.

“Should we text Diana to get the “Okay?” Julian inquired, knowing that Emma had no intention of playing it safe. 

“Jules, we are adults,” Emma replied. “Plus it’s a slow night, I doubt she’ll even care. I’ll bring the sensor and my phone, just in case.” Emma was aware that anything could happen, they were Shadowhunters, she needed to be prepared for anything. 

What they weren’t prepared for though, was a nest filled to the brim with Scorpio demons. They walked down the beach, hand in hand, weapons ready, if necessary. However, as the made their way further down the beach, Emma noticed that the sensor in her pocket was becoming warm. 

“Jules,” She said. “Be on guard, the sensor is heating up.” He looked at her and nodded, now being made aware of a potential threat, his attitude was immediately shifted. 

“How close?” He asked.

“Not sure.” 

“Emma! Watch out!” Julian yelled. It was only at this moment that he had become aware of the presence of a looming Scorpio demon. Julian, drawing a seraph blade and calling out “Gabriel!” with great force as he prepared to face off the demon. Emma, drawing Cortana, silently moved to flank him. The demon, yellow eyes narrowed to slits hissed, revealing its needle-like teeth. This was the moment the battle calm descended in one swift motion. The rest of the world fell away, becoming distant and insignificant in the face of this hulking, bestial threat. 

The demon was the first to lunge, moving as quickly as a blur, barbed tail whipping and spearing towards Emma. She barely managed to dodge, avoiding the needle-like tail. Julian darted forward, then, using the seraph blade to cut deep into the demon’s side, causing a spray of ichor that spattered over Julian. Contact with the liquid made his skin burn. The demon hissed louder, lunging backward before moving with lightning quickness towards Emma. But this time, she was ready, dodging the moving demon and sinking Cortana deep into the demon’s side, killing it in a single fatal stroke. The demon sunk to the ground, disintegrating into nothing. 

Julian exhaled deeply, waiting as the rest of the world came into focus again. Turning towards Emma, Julian’s euphoric feeling of victory faded unbelievably quickly. Emma had sunk to the ground and was clutching her side tightly, her face contorted in pain. Julian dropped the seraph blade to the ground with a clatter, rushing to her side. “Emma!” he shouted. Bending over her, he inhaled sharply at the sight of the vicious stab one penetrating Emma’s side.

“It stabbed me right before I killed it… I didn’t realize it until it was gone.” Emma whispered her face was drawn and pale, the mere act of talking seeming to drain everything from her. 

“Hey hey hey Em stay with me. Stay with me, you’re not dying here.” Julian whipped out a stele, drawing an iratze on her as quickly as possible. The rune faded into her skin, and both anxiously waited for the injury to vanish or at least get milder in some way. When the wound continued to bleed and Emma doubled over wincing, it was clear the rune hadn’t worked. What’s going on? This isn’t normal. Julian’s mind was racing, panic beginning to take over.

Emma was fading fast; it was clear, the poison that had been in the demon’s tail consuming her from the inside out. It feels like fire in my veins. she thought as she faded in and out from consciousness. “Julian, what’s going on?” She managed to say before passing out again.

“No no no no no no Emma hold on please hold on. Don’t leave me now.” Julian begged, tears streaming down his face. Helplessness nearly crippled him at that moment, drowning him in a wave of infinite blue-black darkness. “Help! Somebody, please! Help me!” Julian shouted. Yelling to the angel, praying that he was being heard, but knowing even as he spoke that it was hopeless. They were alone, and beyond help at this point. Emma was convulsing at this point, violently shaking and shivering. Julian frantically drew more iratzes on her, dozens more, hand flying in desperate gestures. But as each one faded, his remaining slivers of hope faded, leaving him cold and empty. 

“Jules,” Emma whispered faintly in a raspy whisper. “I love you.” 

“Oh, my Emma. I love you too.” Their eyes met in that moment, and only a few moments passed before Julian was forced to witness the life vanish from behind her eyes. Her soul, her spirit, her life, everything that made Emma Emma quietly vanished, leaving behind nothing but an empty shell. At that moment, Julian’s heart splintered into pieces and he sobbed. Gripping Emma tightly, Julian sobbed as his very being broke to pieces with grief and sadness and regret and every other possible feeling. 

Have you ever seen the light leave someone’s eyes? Julian had seen it happen more times than he’d care to remember. The moment when you look into a person’s eyes and you know their heart has stopped beating. He had watched some of his closest relatives pass before his eyes. He had looked his father in the eyes as his soul left his corrupted body. He had watched his precious sister’s life be taken away far too soon.

But this? This was infinitely worse. The knowledge that not only was she dead, he had done nothing but sit and watch. All of his efforts seemed so pointless now, insignificant. His Emma’s last words echoing in his mind. Jules. I love you. And he loved her. So much, more than anything he could possibly dream of. For years, she was what kept him grounded. She was what his life was centered around. She had gone from being his first love to being his forbidden love. But that never stopped either of them. Julian had lived silently in love with her for years until their curse was broken. Then, finally, he went back to being his Emma. He would have done everything for her. But now, everything wasn’t enough.

I should have done something else, something more. I could have saved her. If I could have done something better, she would still be here. Julian sobbed to himself, folding inwards under the weight of crushing guilt and grief. Why am I so helpless? Why didn’t I do something, anything else? Em, I am so sorry. I will be sorry until the day I die, and it will never be enough. Because I couldn’t save you, or anybody else. 

[nad-zeta]

Match up (◕‿◕✿)

nAdDy sEnpAi if you’re still doing ikevamp matchups, could you do mine pleaseee 👉🏼👈🏼, school’s been really hectic and i need a pick me up 😔😔 here’s my updated info hehe 😚

I’m a female on the libra-scorpio cusp and a Slytherin, I used to be an ENFP but now I’m an INFP. Appearance-wise, I’m 5'2, i’ve brown eyes and caramel brown hair. I also wear glasses and I’m also quite tanned from being out in the sun all the time.

Personality-wise:

- I can be really enthusiastic about stuff I’m really interested in, such as history (especially world war history), sciences (but physics is trash to me) and anime (I’m a closet nerd hehe) .

- I can be really ambitious and competitive, and I would sometimes place unrealistic expectations on myself, leaving me mentally exhausted and stressed, but like i place these unrealistic measures on myself to strive to be the best

- I do try to chill and take it slow, but you know, sometimes i just can’t 😅

- I’m quite an open book to all my close friends

- I also tend to be really possessive, like I dont like people purposely trying to steal my friends (it happened a lot of times before) and i hate it when someone randomly butts into a conversation i’m having with anyone, especially if it’s a deep conversation

- I can be really awkward around people i don’t click with, but around people i click with, i can be pretty wild and will be able to hold conversations with.

- I tend to procrastinate a lot, and people say i look intimidating but i don’t feel like I’m intimidating.

- I can be really sensitive to other’s emotions and i tend to put others before me, so like my close friend always told me that i’m too much of a giver, like I try to please everyone else and ignore myself

- My love languages are physical touch and quality time

- I can’t stand people who are attention seekers or just aim to be public nuisances as i feel that they’re just really irritating and it gets on my nerves, especially those people who are just doing stupid things to be popular (which is lowkey why i think tiktoks dances are dumb, like seriously i dont get the hype, but i do like tiktok meme videos tho)

- I listen to a lot of different genres of music, but i especially love classics (mozart and chopin are my favourites) and pop.

- I can really insecure at times, because i always feel that every other girl out there is better than me and i’m just a plain and ugly, and partially because i got bullied when i was younger about my appearance

- I like dressing up and putting on makeup occassionally, but i do act like a tomboy most of the time (ie. I hate skirts, like i really dont like them and i have no idea why, but jeans are supreme).

- I also love playing the piano and singing as well, even though i’m not that good at it :D

- People tell me that I’m very curious and persistent, constantly pushing until i get answers, but i do know my limits.

- I’m also very passionate about things I love, and i would do anything to protect people that i care and love.

- I’m also very affectionate and supportive towards my close friends and people i love. - I do have trust issues and I often feel like i do not deserve love and that I hate people who betray my trust.

- I’m ok with pda, but not anything overly affectionate, like hand-holding and kissing is ok, but not making out 😳😖

- I also tend to be pretty forgettful, and i’ll not eat for hours to get my work on hand done (whoop pretty unhealthy but :0)

- I’m also really sarcastic when i want to be, and i can’t hold a poker face to save my life (i swear i always start laughing like 2 seconds in) and I tend to sass people a lot, especially if I’ve had a bad day

- I’m also pretty fiesty and I hate people stereotyping me for my gender (i.e like when someone says that “oh you’re pretty good for a girl”) like what does my gender have to do with my ability? Like there is zero correlation

- My sense of humour is kind of twisted at times but i really love memes and i tend to crack inappropriate jokes sometimes

- I’ve been told that i come across as really flirty to some guys but it’s because i can be really touchy feely to my friends

- I’m also quick to anger, especially if i have a bad day, i hate people who nag and i hate people who put down others

- I’m kind of touch-starved, so i really like hugs and cuddles, but I’m also ticklish so my friends tend to tickle me when hugging me

- I can be a daydreamer at times, like I would get stuck in my own fantasy world when i shouldn’t 😂😂

- I’m also a drama queen around my friends, I dont have a lot of them in real life because of some rumours that others spread, so i only have a close circle of friends i really treasure and would do anything for them

- I also tend to bottle up all my anger and negative thoughts, and would sometimes like explode on others even though I don’t mean to

- Sometimes I don’t really think before I say or act, which is why sometimes I can come off as a bit rude or unfeeling but it’s just me and my impulsiveness 

Fun Facts:

- i really love food, especially sweets (dark chocolate and dango is my life)

- i really hate horror movies (I’m usually pretty brave, but horror movies just get to me so much ergh) but i love chick flicks and adventure flims

- I’m also a hopeless romantic, which is why even little romantic gestures can make my heart flutter

- My hobbies are reading, writing and shooting (only air-rifle though)

- I used to be pretty athletic, I still am, but to a lesser extend now, because i injured my left knee playing volleyball in the past. It’s on it’s road to recovery, but it still hurts quite badly when i overexert myself.

- I love artic foxes and cats, dogs are too energetic for me 😅

- I’m also a sneaker hoarder and I love collecting and wearing sneakers hehe, heels are like torture devices for the feet i dont care even if they make me taller

- Coffee over tea anyday, no offense to peoples who like tea, but a fresh cup of brewed coffee is one of the best things in the world 😚

- I’m really terrible at drawing, I’m not gonna kid you. When i was younger, my art teacher threatened to fail me because im really terrible at drawing. 😂

- I’m also very injury-prone and a bit clumsy, which caused me to have bruises occasionally

- I’m kinda bad and math and physics, but like if you take your time to explain to me then I’ll understand a bit more lol, my best subject is like chemistry

- my ideal date would just be cuddling with my boyfriend, and either watching a movie together or bookshop date hehe

uwu i would be super grateful and happy if you did my matchup uwu thank you sm sending you all my love and hugs and cuddles 🥰💖💕

Hi hi, lia! ❤I’m so happy ya requested! 😆Hehe, I hope you enjoy it love, and I hope this cheers ya up! Love ya lots, and I hope you enjoy it! ❤😊

So I match you with……………. Isaac

Oh, the first time Isaac spotted you in the dining room, introducing yourself to everyone, he was paralyzed with fear. You quite possibly looked more intimidating than anyone he has ever met in his whole entire life, and that’s saying a lot considering you were standing right next to his pure blooded vampire, sire. Comte spotted Isaac hiding behind the doorway of the dining room, peaking in to catch a glimpse of their new guest. You instantly turned around when you heard the blond vampire beckon, someone closer, whose name you know all too well. He had been the cause of endless amounts of math and science homework over the years. 

Your eyes locked with his for a split second, but moments after you met his rosy eyes he darted them to the ground. “I-s-saac Newton, n-nice to meet you.” You gave him a shy smile and took his outstretched hand and shook it, before you could even say a word, Arthur budded in and interrupted. An action which caused you to feel slightly irritated, Isaac looked up at your face and saw that you were starting to become awkward with being the centre of attention. The two of you still held hands when the physicist decided to pull you into the kitchen with him to give you a moment of peace. You smiled when he is a very soft meek voice confessed that he didn’t really like crowds or loud people, a little fact that the two of you bonded over. And before you knew it, you and Isaac were now sitting in the kitchen chatting away in a deep conversation about your mutual dislike of overcrowded places, bullies and plain old public nuisances.

The next day you decided to curiously explore the mansion. You came across a great big library, and you felt as excited as a kid on Christmas day. They had every and any book you could possibly wish for. You decided to spend the day doing something you absolutely loved, and that would be... reading. You had found yourself an old outdated science book, and you were honestly so fascinated at how little had changed in terms of scientific principles over the years. You were so invested in the book you were reading you didn’t even hear Issac walking in. He was on the hunt for his little hedgehog. 

You were awoken from your book reading trance when you heard the sound of a vase smash against the floor. Startled you turned your head towards the loud crash only to see a very distressed looking Isaac. You are naturally sensitive to other emotion, and very much a giver, so it only took one glance at Isaac’s troubled face to prompt you into action. You noticed that he had cut himself on the fallen vase and he was now down crouched on the floor trying to retrieve his terrified hedgehog, who had gotten himself caught at the bottom of one of the large bookcases. 

Wordlessly you laid on the floor beside Isaac and peered under the bookcase, when you spotted little Harry cowering in the dark corner tangled in a ball of wool. Your hands and arms were much smaller than Issac’s, so you were easily able to reach under the bookcase and secure the little hedgehog. Both of you sat up as you cradle the scared little animal in your hands, trying to untangle the wool that was wrapped around his body. “My God, Harry, I was worried sick about you, please never disappear like that again.” both you and Isaac breathed a sigh of relief at the now rescued critter.

That is when you looked up and noticed that Harry wasn’t the only hedgehog who had been injured, “Isaac, your hand!” You stood up and offered Isaac a hand up, you then gently took his hand in yours and led him to your room. You sat him down on your bed and gently started treating the injury as Harry had made himself comfortable, now sleeping on your pillow. While treating Isaac’s injury, you started chatting away with him. You could see him blushing profusely from embarrassment so you decided to tell him about the book you were reading before the whole fiasco. At the mention of the science book, Isaac instantly perked up and met your enthusiasm ten fold. After his wound was wrapped and treated, the two of you sat in deep conversation for the second time that week, chatting all about science and your mutual love for the subject. And that my dear friend is how you and Isaac had become good friends

Since that day, it wasn’t uncommon for the two of you to be sitting across from each other in the library, reading away. Usually, Harry would be nestled in your lap as you and Isaac enjoy a quiet afternoon together. Some afternoon the two of you would just simply sit in silence and read while other afternoons were filled with laughter and conversation between the two of you cuties. 

As the days went on Isaac had noticed a very curious fact about you, and that was how forgetful you were. He had noticed that you would go hours and hours without eating or drinking something which strangely enough, was the exact opposite of him, who required minimum routine of five meals a day. It was this curious observation that had started the habit of the two of you dining together every day. Something which both of you really enjoyed, especially now that the two of you were determined to find the best sweets in all of Paris. Every day without fail, at lunchtime you and Isaac would go out to town to try a new cafés for lunch and sweet. These café crawls usually involved Isaac showing you around Paris, visiting book stores together and leisurely walking beside the Seine. You honestly loved spending time with this hedgehog, who had seemed to have completely opened up to you. 

Isaac loved your inappropriate jokes and twisted humour and would bust out into uncontrollable laughter whenever you would crack a joke. One time as the two of you were sitting on the fountain’s edge eating some ice cream, you saw a man falling up stairs. As hard as you tried, you couldn’t keep a poker face, it just wasn't in you, especially when Isaac had just witnessed the exact same scene and was now looking at you and snickering. Of course, being the sweet angels you were, you rushed to see if the man was alright, however, your walk home with Isaac was filled with jokes and endless laughter of the days events. 

Ooh how Isaac had fallen head over heels for you, his favourite thing in the world was to hear you sing and play the piano. He would silently walk into the piano room whenever you played, and just let the beautiful sounds wash away his weariness of the day. He would shower you with endless compliments, even more so, when you would deny them, saying that you aren’t that good. These playful little banter fights usually end with him tickling you. He usually won’t give up until you admit that you are the best singer and piano player in the whole mansion. Cue Mozart walking in like challenge accepted.

The night Isaac finally confessed his feeling for you was on, one warm summers night. The night started of with Isaac taking you out to watch a musical concert. He knew just how much you love music. Before he had met you, he had never really bother taking the time to listen to music, as he had always been far to absorbed with his own work, to stop and smell the flowers. However since meeting you, he found himself utterly enjoying going to the opera and musical concerts and letting himself just get absorbed by the sound of music. He loved the way your eyes gleamed as you watched and listened to the performance. 

After the concert, he lead you out into the garden, where his telescope had been all set up. The two of you sat together and stargazed while Mozart played some romantic classical music in the background, which was arranged by the resident hedgehog himself. Somewhere between the beautiful sight of the stars and the gentle melody playing in the background. Isaac build up the courage to finally reveal to you just how madly in love he was with you. He then produced a bunch of red roses out of thin air and resting in the roses was a card with a hand-drawn meme ( courtesy of Sabastian) asking you in the most hilarious way to stay in the past with him. The two of you met in a sweet kiss and the rest of the evening was spent cuddled in each other’s arms under the stars.

Both of you are pretty touch starved creatures, so expect to be cuddled, snuggled, kissed and hugged whenever Isaac comes across you. Like if Isaac spots you in the garden hanging laundry he will give you the biggest hug from behind, kiss your neck and then tell you how much he loves you, before he is off with Napo to teach the children.  

Don’t worry about your impulsive behaviours, bottled up emotions or a quick temper. Isaac might be new to the whole human behaviour thing but he is very in-tune with your emotions and he will instantly pick up when you are feeling upset or angry. He will aim to fix every and all problems immediately, especially if it is causing you hurt or upset. This also counts for when you are over stressing yourself, about putting too high an expectation on yourself. If he sees you getting angry, stressed or frustrated, he will pull you into his arms and gently stroke your hair, you can’t be angry when you are being so gently held and loved. Isaac will sit an listen to all your troubles. 

He always encourages you to communicate whenever you are having negative emotions so he can help you through it the best way he knows how, with cuddles. He would usually make you a cup of coffee and pull you into his lap and cuddle you, as you unpack everything and anything that had upset you that day. He will patiently listen and leave small little kisses on your cheeks to remind you that he is there for you and will support you no matter what

He loves your competitive side, even more so when you use it to win a bet and beat Arthur. HE also loves how open-minded you are. The two of you often teach each other new skills, for example, you have been teaching Isaac how to shoot while Isaac has been patiently teaching you maths and science.

He low key loves how possessive you are and is just as possessive over you. He absolutely adores you and will remind you of that every single day. 

He loves holding your hands and giving you small kisses on the cheeks whenever the two of you go out together. He honestly can’t believe it when you feel insecure about the way you look, “You are honest to God, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.” Will tickle you and shower you with kisses and loving words whenever you are feeling insecure about yourself. 

He will always snicker when your feisty side comes out. Like whenever you sass the men at the banquets for spewing gender based stereotypes and being ignorant. Once they have been put in their place, Isaac while still laughing at the hilarious smack-down you just gave the ignorant men will always give you the sweetest kisses, “God, I love you so much.”

Isaac legit loves everything about you from your quick temper to your clumsy streak. You best be sure this hedgehog is ganna be right by your side whenever you clumsily injure yourself. He will legit sweep you off your feet and nuzzle into your neck, all while making sure you didn’t injure yourself too severely. 

This boy loves you to the moon and back and would do anything to make you happy. If you are overexerting your injured knee you best be sure he will piggyback you to his room and do everything in his power to ease away the pain. Even if that means taking a soothing hot bath with you.

Often the two of you cuties can be found cuddled together, each reading their own book. Both your love languages are physical touch and quality time so Isaac is happiest when you are nestled near him simply spending some good quality time together.

Other potential matches…………. Comte 

I hope you have the best day lia! Sending ya all the hugs! ❤❤🌻 @i-sleep-like-napoleon

[act-addict-actors-matchups]

@otomeramblings said,

I'm a girl, 23 years old, around 162 cm, with medium length dark brown hair (almost black) and brown eyes. I'm one of those people who are often asked "are you okay? Are you mad?" and no, more often than not that's just how my resting face looks lol

I'm a Scorpio and an INFP. According to my friends, I'm usually very sweet but no one likes to be around me when I get seriously angry ^^; I guess it's because i'm generally very soft spoken and I try to avoid conflict as much as I can, and when I'm upset is one of the times when I actually raise my voice. I have people tell me that I'm smart, but I just consider myself to be an overall average person. It usually takes me a while to fully trust someone but once they've earned my trust, I cherish their friendship for life.

I can fluently speak English and Spanish, and I recently got my English Translation degree. I love to read (both novels and manga) and to discover new music, I also really like dancing (I did ten years of ballet) and I recently rediscovered my love for drawing and writing.

Qualities I would like in a s/o:

-passionate, about anything, really. I'm usually very reserved unless I have something I really want to talk about and I appreciate when others listen, and for that reason I love to listen to people talk about things they're passionate about

-mature, not in relation to his hobbies bit more so in the sense that he can have a serious conversation when needed and take responsibility for his actions.

-patient. Being introverted and kinda awkward, I usually need time to recharge after being social and even while spending time together there will probably be silences when I think of what to say or even times when I'd just rather we spent it doing our own thing while being together.

Qualities I don't like:

-shouting. I hate it when people shout at me when they're mad because it makes me tear up immediately, I would much rather you tell why you're mad in a calm tone so we can work things out.

✧ The way I scREAMED when I saw your url 🤭 I love your writing so much skdhksdhksjd thank you for requesting a matchup. 😳💞 Stay safe! I hope all goes well for you!

I’d match you with: . . .

➜ HOW YOU TWO FIRST MET ; The blue sky was dotted with fluffy white clouds that drifted lazily in the gentle breeze while you were on your way to buy new drawing pencils. Your current ones were not exactly in the best condition after being used too many times. A sigh escaped from you as you fastened your pace. In all honesty, you would rather stay at home and maybe watch one of your shows but you knew if you didn’t go out to buy those now, you never would. As one particular building came to your sight, you suddenly stopped in your tracks. It was a flower shop. The vibrant display of flowers covered the table outside. Bold purple, soft pink and light lavender flowers sat right in front of you as well as some others you didn’t know the names of. The sweet smell of blossomed flowers filled your nose as you inhaled and exhaled. They were so beautiful that you couldn’t help but to reach at a lavender, the purple petals felt like soft velvet against your skin. The chime of the door opening ringed into your ears, drawing your attention away from the flowers in front of you. A man with a blue striped T-shirt, a pair of black pants and black leather shoes came out of the building with a bag you thought had flower seeds in it. A brown trench coat with a blue inner lining slung over his shoulder, beautiful, dark blue hair rustling as he gave his thanks to the employee before closing the door. The man turned around and you swear you stop breathing for a moment, because oh my god how dare someone this handsome come in to your field of view without a warning. After realizing that you’ve been staring at a stranger for a good seconds, you hesitantly looked away. But just your luck, while you decided that it was the time to carry on with your mission, you dropped your purse to the ground. You groaned before bending over to pick it up but to your surprise, you see another hand reaching over it? And most importantly, you saw that it was that handsome stranger when you looked up??? He gave you a kind but awkward smile as he hold out your bag to you. You muttered a “thank you” before grabbing it. After that cliche moment, there was an awkward silence between you and the man, but he decided to speak up to start a conversation by asking if you liked flowers. The conversation smoothly flowed from there. He just had that aura of gentleness radiating that you couldn’t help but warm up to the stranger, who you later learned the name of, quickly. He even offered to accompany you to the shop you were going, which you agreed if he didn’t mind. Your relationship steadily developed from there. To be honest, it wouldn't be obvious at all that Tsumugi has a crush on you. He's friendly and sweet to everyone he meets most of the time so nobody thinks twice whenever he's with you, except maybe Tasuku. His underlying feelings for you would show in the little things he does, the way his eyes shine whenever you laugh, how his ears perk up whenever he hears your name, how he somehow memorized all your favorite foods after you offhandedly mentioned it once before. For someone who majored in psychology, it’s kind of hilarious how dense he is regarding his own feelings. He would mistake those feelings of his as a weirdly strong platonic attraction for you and continue spending time with you in hopes to appease the feeling but be confused as to why he always felt unsatisfied. He finally realizes how smitten he is for you after a long internal monologue he had after he almost had a heart attack when you hugged him once for whatever reason.

➜ PERSONALITY COMPATIBILITY ; Tsumugi is the walking epitome of every single thing you’re looking in a S/O. You want someone passionate about something? This man literally couldn’t give up on his dream and love for the performance art. He’d be more than willing to talk about how acting involved a broad range of skills, including a well-developed imagination, emotional facility, physical expressivity, vocal projection, clarity of speech, the ability to interpret drama etc. He’d try bunch of different gestures in front of you and ask you which one you liked the best. He also absolutely loves it when you are the one who does the talking. His strength is CANONLY listening to others after all. He just gives off this aura that compels you to think that you can talk about anything and everything with him. Just like you, Tsumugi has a great need for harmony and dislikes any conflict so if there were to be any fights, they would be resolved in a day or two with the two of you talking it out. He majored in Psychology in university, and is very good at reading people so if you’re both in a social gathering and he senses you need to take a break, he will hold your hand and walk you somewhere with less crowd and noise. When you want to be alone, he’d give you the space you need and if you want to spend time he would be there. He is a pretty clueless baby at the start and would try to ask people for help on dating advice. He will however remember every single memory you two will and have made. You’ll never see him forgetting any milestones in your guys’ relationship. His way of saying “I love you” is through the flowers he picks and grows. As someone who can be shy to vocally express his love for you, he handpicks each flower based on their meanings with the hope that they could accurately convey the emotions he holds for you. The very sight of your smile as you watch each tiny plant grow kindles a budding warmth inside him, as if he’s a bee intoxicated by the nectar of your happiness. And to him, the vision of you happy is prettier than any flower in his garden, pushing him to always keep you bright and blooming.

➜ SHARED ACTIVITIES ; Tsumugi canonly moon/stargazes with Misumi so why wouldn’t he do the same with his S/O? It’s a cool, romantic and surprisingly unique activity to do together. There aren’t many activities one can plan for a date that are sweeter or more intimate than a night spent together under a beautiful, sparkling sky. You would ask each other questions about one another, without being afraid of letting the conversation slow down. This is a date to relax and linger over. If not that, I can totally see him taking you to a botanical garden. These places are beautiful and not too busy in general. Bonus points if you bring a camera and get some nice photos together as a couple. i’m so soft rn 🥺 But I feel like your most common date would be either tending the garden in the mankai dorm or just doing your own little things while being together. You might be writing on the table while he’s going over his script for the winter troupe’s newest play one more time or he might be grading his student’s test, since he’s a tutor and all, while you’re drawing. I see Tsumugi as someone who reads a lot so maybe both of you can read the same book together and discuss it afterwards. These types of dates are great for discovering how the other person views the world. One might learn that their significant other is passionate about a social justice cause, their favorite author, or their philosophy of beauty. These dates are great for sparking good conversations and they are introvert friendly. Or something even better: reading aloud. Reading out loud to each other can be incredibly sweet. And, as spiritual counselor Davida Rappaport says, "just the fact that you are both close and sharing space is ... a nice way to spend an evening."

➜ ZODIAC COMPATIBILITY ; Tsumugi is a Capricorn, his birthday being December 28th. When Scorpio and Capricorn make a love match, they get an opportunity to not only enjoy a loving relationship and learn the value of being a pair, but also to grow and mature as individuals. These two may be wary about sharing themselves with one another at first, and this emotional caution may dampen the initial impact of this relationship. These two tend to be a bit cautious (Capricorn) and pensive (Scorpio), and it takes a while for them to feel comfortable with a significant other. Though they may be shy of getting involved and not the quickest to trust and share, these two Signs will discover that they can have quite a profound connection — one of friendship and deep loyalty. What’s the best thing about the Scorpio-Capricorn love match? Their determination toward shared ideas and their strong devotion to one another. They can open doors to one another’s souls and show one another new ways of perceiving and feeling.

[isabeladraws]

this took longer than i wanted to, hopefully you don’t mind! i wanted to make a big thread of random thoughts that came into my head. i decided to answer this way so i can put a cut and people don’t have to read this ridiculously long post!

sunday and beckett pregnancy hcs 🌷👶✨

beckett knows sunday is pregnant before herself. during her period week he knows her mood changes and how horny she sometimes can be. her period is very regular and he knows what to expect and how to comfort her during it. but, it never came. he was busy himself and didn’t realise it until that time of the month was well past them.

“sunday, is everything alright with… you know.. your period?”

“what do you mean?”

“it’s late. your period is never late”

“i think it might be from stress of the games. it’s been madness!”

beckett didn’t seem reassured but he let it go. she knows her body better than he ever could. sunday however was starting to have doubts so she buys a pregnancy test and wouldn’t you freaking know it… it’s positive.

beckett knows when sunday looks at him after she takes that test. he doesn’t even have to see it to believe when she says “you were right… i’m pregant, b”

he hugs her like never before, lifting her off the ground, swaying her in his arms. beckett cries a little, sunday does too. the shock is so big, it wasn’t planned but at the same time, very wanted.

“only beckett harrington to figure out when a girl’s period is late”

“hey, it’s a great few days for said beckett harrington”

“well, too bad they won’t be happening for a while”

“i wouldn’t change a thing, sunday. i love you”

“i love you t- WHAT IF IT’S TWINS BECKETT????!! we cannot handle two babies at once, can we?? omg mom is going to freak out, and atlas… we’re gonna be PARENTS! BECKETT WHY ARE YOU SMILING, YOU NEED TO FREAK OUT WITH ME!!”

they only tell atlas and shreya during the first trimester. sunday knew atlas wouldn’t be able to keep the secret from shreya and shreya would figure it out in 10 minutes anyway. they’re happy to have someone to talk to about it.

it’s the 6 week apointment, sunday had only had a blood test to confirm the pregnancy and passed with flying colors. beckett was with her of course and they were excited to see baby.

the doctor found one baby and they smiled, everything looked healthy and 10 seconds later the doctor is like oh looks like there’s two! oh my mistake, there are three babies in there!

beckett didn’t faint because he was already sitting down. sunday saw her life flash before her eyes.

“what?” said both of them

“yeap, three heartbeats, it’s too early to tell if they might be identical or not”

“are you absolutely sure, doctor?” asked beckett

and the doctor showed them in the ultrassoung machine, three black voids filled with a white dot each and their pulsing hearts. they were having triplets.

i believe pregnancy with multiples need to monitored way more often than ones with just one baby so regular appts for these two. beckett hates missing them but they’re both busy

beckett would still be studying and working freelance (i still have no concrete idea what his job would be, maybe something with writing/research?)

sunday is told to slow things down so she takes a break from the team before quitting altogether 

i haven’t decided on the triplets birthday yet but i’m leaning torwards scorpio/sagittarius season (maybe aries season too?)

beckett and sunday still travel quite a bit 

sunday feels pretty great for the most part, i think the hardest part of her pregnancy is towards the end

beck really wanted to take a photo of sunday each week and see the growth of their babies;  he made a whole album with his thoughts and hopes for their family and gave it to sunday after the babies were born

they travelled to quite a few places during the 9 months, maybe 6 to 7 different locations. sunday being at home more and feeling pretty good during the 2nd trimester they took a few roadtrips to places close to them

atlas and shreya moved out of their shared apt so beckett moved in with sunday right before they found out they were pregnant

i don’t know if they’d be married at this point in time or not

they would have been living together before getting pregnant, sunday would spend most of her time at beckett’s place but she wasn’t “officially” moved in because she travelled quite a bit due to thief and the games 

to me, for some reason, their lives seem hectic and busy af after graduating, everything happens at once for them

getting signed with a thief team, beckett getting acknowledged for his skills and scoring independent jobs and working on his masters, sunday is travelling all the time

i feel like beckett one day, in the midst of all the business, while they were still half asleep in bed was just like “marry me” and sunday thought she was actually dreaming. there was no way this boy was asking her to marry him right now 

“what” she kinda giggled “marry me” he sounded so serious she woke up and sit up

they stayed in silence just staring at each other for a while until they started smilling and the thought really sank in, it was barely morning 

“sunday, marry me” 

“i think i’ll need to hear that again a few more times”

did they elope later that afternoon?? WHO KNOWS 

back to your scheduled programming of pregnancy with triplets:

sunday got real swolen, painfully swolen at some point in time. 

weird cravings of butternut squash everything. beckett became quite good at using it in a variety of recipes

sunday really missed her job during her pregnancy and felt quite lost. she felt her only purpose was to carry these kids around and moan back pain every 5 minutes. 

but she also realised she didn’t want to do thief after becoming a mother. that chapter felt like it was closing for her and she needed to take a step foward into a new career path (i have yet to figure it out)

very cranky and moody sunday. she also hated getting advice from her mom on her pregnancy. it would just annoy her

atlas got real good at getting these two away from each other

god atlas as an AUNT wow

she really started to fear sunday at the end of her pregnancy like... the look sunday would give when she was pissed off ... oof 

atlas and beckett are the only ones sunday wanted with her when it was delivery time

i imagined it was most likely a c-section? would there be more “innovative” ways in the magick world to give birth?? 

moving on that’s not important

beckett studies pregnancy yoga intensely so he can teach sunday

tmi.. or nsfw... sex is pretty fun 

sunday thinks it will be 2 girls and one boy, the girls being identical 

beckett thinks it’s 3 girls

they restored their baby blanket atlas found and used it in the nursery

sunday and beckett did not find out the sexes of the babies until birth

(it was a bet. sunday was actually the one that was DYING to find out and lost)

shreya was the only one that guessed correctly (2 boys 1 girl) 

bougie ass baby gifts from shreya. special one of a kind super gentle lotion, shampoo. baby shoes, oils and butters for stretch marks, blankets with their names on it, literally you name it

there’s something about baths... sunday would never take them but it became nighttime ritual at some point

beckett is very aware of people’s names now that he has to name 3 kids and is VERY opinionated 

he even starts to question his name, sunday’s name, everyone else around him “you have a such a weird name sunday, what was theia thinking” “COME SAY THAT TO YOUR PREGNANT WIFE’S FACE, HARRINGTON”

sunday needs to pull a break on that for a while so they stop throwing name ideas for a few weeks 

they agree on marlow first, sunday suggests it and beckett isn’t much of a fan until he finds himself using it in his head. when he sees his baby boy he knows it’s his name 

they had one unexpected visit from the sources to congratulate sunday and beckett on the pregnancy and marriage. i’m pretty sure gemma called selene’s wood attunement.

sunday does not want anyone touching her belly but she’s kinda anxious about it so atlas is always ready to fight somebody’s hand off

god can u imagine these sisters coming this far in their lives, sunday is going to be a mother, atlas an aunt how happy atlas is to be able to see a future she thought would be lost after so many years of running from raife and the heartache and loss. I AM EMOTIONAL. 

doting aunt atlas like she SPOILS these kids to death

katrina might have a kid of her own at this point in time, since she’s older than beckett? sunday would appreciate her advice way more in comparision to her mother’s. (i could also see katrina not wanting kids but i don’t know if she has hinted either way)

beckett’s family has been a bit harsh when it comes to sunday’s job but she wins everyone over eventually so they do find themselves falling in love with her. they find sunday so warm and kind and easy to talk to. his parents are so happy to be grandparents of three kids no less, and are prepared to spoil them to bits. 

i can see her with the harringtons spending the summer together, his mother talking about when beckett was a baby himself which seemed not that long ago. 

the boys share a room in their grandparent’s house while selene has one of her own once they’re about 5/6 years old. while they’re toddlers, they do sleep in the same room together. 

they really do dote on these kids. beckett has never seen them this affectionate before in his life. 

beckett’s father and jett bond very nicely. both are a fan of sports. 

zeph and griff give sunday and beck so many delicious homecooked meals they can freeze for after birth but also to eat whenever they want. 

zeph got the tendency of showing up like “my abuela cooked extra this week so i thought i’d give you some for dinner”

they do not complain once. the meals are delicious

zeph really enjoys babysitting the kiddos, especially as they get a bit older and start to waddle around, speaking gibberish you understand but not really. the kids are really impressed by his water tricks. bath time is a mess (with him and in general tbh)

beckett and sunday have one big fight during the pregnancy. sunday is feeling lost and weird about her career, job, path in general and beckett always has something to say instead of just listening which frustrates them both. they fight all day the first time but can’t go to sleep angry so they talk it out during the night. neither of them has much sleep but they settle things down, beckett just listens and explains where he came from, apolagizes, sunday too, they figure it out in the end. this comes up again but sunday just points it out to him what he’s doing and he’s like “my bad, babe”. 

sunday eats pretty much plant-based during the pregnancy apart from having a few eggs here and there. she has this aversion of meat, it sounds disgusting to her (marlow’s influence?) 

beckett sings to the babies a lot, sunday falls asleep to it often

i can see beckett having choir lessons when he was younger and actually being a pretty good vocalist

atlas buys baby things ALL THE TIME. goes jogging, sees a random store “oh sunday i found this dumb ass onesie, here” “i saw this arylu plushie and thought the kids would like it” “this muslin cloth has cat butts on it, let me get that 1 for each kid” sunday literally doesn’t need to buy anything because everyone is buying them baby stuff 24/7 

shreya planned the baby shower where they basically just asked for diappers and ended up with high-tech baby stuff, beckett was actually pretty intrigued by some of them

massages. everyone that goes into that apt just sees beckett rubbing some lotion on sunday and massaging some area in her body, feet, back, legs. towards the end it’s a must if sunday wants to walk around for more than 20 minutes without being in pain.

if you finished reading this, congratulations! here, have a 🍄.

this is already so freaking long and even though i feel like i could get some more hc’s going i’m gonna stop here and save any that i find important for another post. let me know what you guys think and don’t mind the typos too much  I’M SICK🙈

[antpernas]

1/23/21

This day was... whew boy. A trip.

So, we started off alright, we woke up at an OK time but didn’t end up getting ready to do stuff until after my parents had left for work. At that point, we decided to *get it on* which was SOOOO much fun. Douching together was hilarious, and a nice little throwback to when we first met. It was also nice to finally have sex with someone that I truly, deeply cared about again, and (MOST IMPORTANTLY) to have it be reciprocated. The fact that it was good sex was just a nice perk :) Definitely boosted my confidence with topping, since it had been so long!

After we finished up, we started getting ready to head north! Our first task was to test my kayak and see if it would hold up under our combined weights. The answer; barely! But barely would HAVE to do, since the beach I wanted to take him to was only accessible by boat or by kayak. We loaded my kayak, and this time I made sure that I actually grabbed the oars! Then, off we went!

Before we got to the park, we made a stop at Joseph’s market to get some lunch. Oh my GODDD how horrible a decision that was!! Scorpio was, yet again, overwhelmed with the many choices available to him. He ended up buying various quantities of different items, as opposed to doing the dinner combo like I had suggested, and spent just a bit too much money on food. But, GREAT food, so in my opinion it was worth it! Though, I’m sure his wallet didn’t feel the same.

Afterwards, we made a straight shot to the park, all the while making sure my kayak wasn’t slipping off my car to go tumbling into traffic like a large boulder the size of a small boulder. I think Scorpio ate a little bit while I was driving, and I, as always, took the opportunity to show him more music. This time, I showed him the soundtrack to the sequel of the game I tried to get us to play the night before, which we ended up dozing off while playing. Once we got there, I parked so I could eat my food, then we started getting ready to launch!

Getting into the kayak was the simple partl. The real challenge was getting across to the entrance. Poor Scorpio had to sit in the seat and row us across on this barely balanced kayak, otherwise the weight wasn’t properly distributed. I remember him asking me to hold him tighter while he rowed, which was just... UGH butterflies! It was in this moment that I started singing “Go the Distance,” sparking a new, very unique step in my intimacy with him. Singing seriously was something I had never done in front anyone, and especially not intentionally. I felt very vulnerable, but it was also kind of liberating. And he told me it helped, which made me feel even better. Soon enough, we made it across!

The walk to the beach was gorgeous, and we ended up sparking a discussion about Disney movies and Broadway musicals, which was a part of my memories I hadn’t brushed off in a LONG time. It was also interesting to hear about some of his experiences with them. As much as I love to talk, hearing him talk about his past or his life at any time he felt comfortable sharing it was so amazing. It was almost like it made him seem more real to me, like he wasn’t just this perfect, extraterrestrial angel that brought happiness everywhere he went, but in fact, a human! It was nice.

We ended up singing some more until we got to the beach, which was choppy as SHIT. I already knew from the clouds that it wouldn’t be a good day for snorkeling, but to say I had anticipated the water to be that bad would be a lie. We ended up making an attempt for a few minutes before we just decided to swim normally and then walk the beach and chat more. At some point, we turned around to start trying to get to the exit, but we couldn’t find it! We ended up passing it and hitting the north end of the beach/island, talking about musicals and stuff the entire way there. We found a pretty cool abandoned jetty/pier thing, though, which was SUPER cool. We decided to risk losing the daylight and walked along it while chatting some more.

We got a ways into the path before he stopped me for a second and said there was something he wanted to tell me.

Oh boy.

He didn’t even finish the sentence before I knew where this was going. And then he said it. “I just don’t think I like you that way... You’re like a bro to me.” Surprisingly, I took this pretty well at first! I didn’t cry, didn’t pout, and I think I handled it pretty well. But then we sort of finished the conversation that we were having and it went dead silent between us. And THAT’S when I started to feel it.

I don’t even think I can recount the absolute rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts I had while we started searching for the exit again. I tried my best to be as sweet and enthusiastic as I normally was with him, but I just wasn’t in the headspace to do it, I don’t think. And halfway through the walk back to the dock from the beach exit, I just started choking on my tears. I remember just being so very... conflicted? Angry? Sad? I just couldn’t even begin to piece it together. I was disgusted with myself for thinking I was mad at Scorpio simply because he didn’t feel the same way about me, and I felt stupid for even thinking to feel entitled to that from him in the first place, even though, up until that point, it had never occurred to me that I was! I still don’t even think I was; my mind was just trying to jump to an easy answer to the questions I had bouncing in my head, and blaming Scorpio seemed like the most simple solution, even though every part of me knew that’s not what I wanted to do.

I kept thinking about it, though, and once we were coming up on the entrance, I finally realized who I was REALLY angry at; myself. I was angry because I felt stupid for devoting so much of myself to someone who never felt the same way, for potentially making someone I cared about so much feel that they were obligated to show me that same affection back. Once I came upon this realization, the waterworks REALLY started coming down. But it was liberating to know that I wasn’t truly angry at Scorpio. Really, all I felt in my heart for him was, and is, love. And it was comforting to know that there was nothing more to this situation than that it just. Plain. Sucked. We can’t control who we get butterflies for, and it just so happened that Scorpio didn’t feel that way for me. And that’s okay!

(Sidebar, he chipped his toenail soon after he told me that, and joked that the universe was already putting him in his place. I have a thing to say about that later.)

And this is when I asked myself one very important question; what’s next? That’s what I got to mull on once we got to the kayak and I had to hold him while he rowed us across again, still in silence.

Loading the kayak was a bit of a chore, but we managed to do it and started heading on our way. As much as I tried to hold back my tears once we started going, it just wasn’t happening. This was especially true once I REALLY tried to choke them back to finish talking about the soundtrack to the game I was showing him. The floodgates were OPENED. But it was a relief.

We started chatting and I got what I wanted to say off my chest; that it was all okay. That I realized I’m just mad at myself, and that it’s not his fault that he doesn’t feel the same way for me (not that he needed my validation or anything). I thanked him for being honest and giving me the chance to see him again, as well as this closure, and I apologized for being distant while we were heading back to my car. He was reassuring through all of this, telling me that it was okay, and making sure I understood that he still wanted to be friends, as long as I wanted to be.

And this is when I sort of came upon an answer to that question. I realized a LOT in that hour~ long period after he told me what he needed to, but perhaps the most important takeaway for me is that I just want to be happy. All the other details about situations are semantics; if I love someone and it makes me happy to spend time with them, then I should do it! And if it doesn’t, then I won’t. It’s as simple as that. It doesn’t matter if we’re dating, if we’re friends, or whatever it may be; I didn’t even have concrete definitions for those anyway, so this thought process was the real answer to all my problems. Do what makes me happy. And Scorpio makes me happy. So even if he doesn’t love me the same way, if he wants to be friends, then I’m thankful he’s not just cutting me out of his life and I get to spend more time with him some day! I just need time to get over the heartbreak and adjust to our new relationship. A strong relationship at that.

The “thing” I had to say earlier was that I didn’t by any means want Scorpio to feel as though he deserved some kind of punishment just for breaking my heart. I can already imagine it sucks to hurt someone you care about, and the last thing I would ever want is to rub salt in his wounds. I may poke fun about it in the future when we see each other again, but I would never want to make him feel as though he needs to truly be ashamed or guilty for being honest with me. It’s sort of for this same reason that I don’t like saying he “broke my heart.” Even though he did, just saying it like that paints him as an antagonist, when really, he was just honest with me, and he still means the world to me. He made me realize I need better friends, JAJA!

But, yeah! That was my internal journey, and after that all that was left was to heal, mostly. On the way home, I gushed more about the soundtrack and we chatted about my background with music. He said he was always impressed with me and how I’d taught myself so much about music, and it made me feel all sheepish, but good! We stopped at my old middle school and took a walk around the park/trail right outside of it, and chatted a little bit more about me and my childhood. Once we finished there, we hopped back in the car and went home.

For the most part, home was alright! The only weird part was figuring out our new boundaries, and since everything was so fresh, I wasn’t sure where I wanted to set them. Of course, the ball was in my court, but I didn’t want to suddenly turn on a dime and act as if I didn’t like Scorpio at all, because that would never be the case! My second greatest regret of that trip was not cuddling him when we went to sleep that night.

EDIT: I LIED we tried to play Monument Valley before we went to sleep but we ended up dozing off. Also we talked about our views on relationships when we parked at Red Reef park.